#/know/ the other wont believe them which makes for a great but also really funny kind of trust

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

"this is the third secondment youve been selected for" "i thought it was the second" ... "this is your fourth secondment"

[zelenbug]

me and my friends came up with an incredible interpretation of raymesis and glombrox which makes them really good to put into situations LET ME RAMBLE ABOUT THEM AT LENGTH THEYRE LIKE THE FUNNIEST GUYS EVER

-

raymesis is a Giant Petty Loser. for reasons unknown to everyone (even to himself) he HATES rayman SO BAD, he believes hes raymans greatest rival, and and he is obsessed with trying to soil his reputation or at least mess with him by pulling things on him

he never succeeds bc hes also the unluckiest person in the glade. he would try to sneak in and try and explode rayman with cartoon dynamite while hes not looking but ends up tripping over the wire and exploding himself. that type of stuff

one particular method he tries to mess with rayman is by pulling various bad things (kicking over a trash can! oh no!) and then trying to convince everyone he IS rayman. it Never Works. everyone can tell hes some other guy

oh yeah also what makes him even more mad is the fact that nobody really even knows who he is. every time he announces to rayman's face hes his greatest rival rayman just goes "wait really? i dont rememeber you" and continues to be nice to him and that makes him Livid

raymesis would actually do this pose and think that makes him super cool. he wears embarassing gamer shirts unironically. hes such a loser that literally god himself calls him ugly

-

glombrox was never "a hero" or "possessed by darktoons" he is Just Like That. like a lot characters in my interpretations kept being bullied as a kid but glombrox is the one who Bullied others as a kid. he gets a kick out of messing with everyone, he views everyone basically the same (acceptable targets for kicking) which includes raymesis

he just nonchalantly decides to play basketball with a teensy instead of a ball, he would do the exact same things to lums that lividngstones do. he goes to the docks at sea of serendipity and does this to all red wizards

he doesnt do any elaborate pranks he just shoves people or kicks them around or whatever. that said, you wouldnt be able to tell by looking at him or how he acts, but hes actually surprisingly clever/smart at times

glombrox also has the complete opposite issue from raymesis. being that he literally wont stop being mistaken for globox, having a basically identical shape and voice, and its not helped by the fact that globox and his kids also find it acceptable to slap people for fun (actually for fun with no mean intent)

nobody catches onto the fact that hes so mean and still keep mistaking him for someone whos the complete opposite of mean! they just thank who they THINK is globox but isnt!!! he has a personal vendetta against globox because of it, but not remotely to the same extent as raymesis' whole thing. hes just extra mean to globox when he comes across him but globox is like "hi me : )" and just takes it all as a fun thing which doesnt help matters

-

their dynamic is basically wario and waluigi in warios warehouse (raymesis is waluigi) except if they didnt live together and wario had no idea who mario and luigi were beyond getting mistaken for mario one billion times which makes him mad

raymesis mostly just drags glombrox along for his Evil Plans, taking advantage of what everyone keeps thinking he is, and glombrox just goes along mostly because he thinks itd be funny. theyre technically friends but in some messed up way and would gladly insult each other

glombrox himself takes advantage of the fact that raymesis fully believes that glombrox is his great trusty sidekick (which he isnt). also he just comes to raymesises dingy apartment and raids his fridge and occupies literally the entire couch to watch tv

Heres some incorrect quotes (from here) to describe all of these fools further (though rayman would Not swear in the first one he would just be like "huh what??")

also this one but i actually put names in there

-

bonus:

murfy counterpart to raymesis and glombrox is the guy who wrote the manual. hes nicer than murfy is he just doesnt appreciate murfys comments about the manual. raymesis thought it was a Great Idea to drag him along with him and glombrox on occacion. but he doesnt actually want to get involved he wants to write for gods sake

teesny counterpart would just be ales honestly but ales doesnt like to associate with these other losers (despite being one himself and also being comically petty about being bullied as a kid) so he usually doesnt

[yuhi-san]

Hospital yuri be on my yay! Vol 4 lots going on in the few first pages already.

Floppy haired vash is so adorable omg

Them making contact all of a sudden just then felt a little abrupt but good for them! Of course knives has to ruin it. Makes you wonder just how much he notices and knows of things going on.

Wolfwood oh man. I think its easy to miss how much time he spends just trying to keep it together and to adjust to all the curveballs hes thrown ever since he met vash. I think that deserves his own post eventually but he is not having a great time. But his reaction to the satelit and them making contact is really telling. His “will we be saved? Us…?” speaks volumes about ww. I think it shows how little hope for the future he really has. He can’t think much further than surviving tomorrow and maybe, if he’s lucky and smart and ruthless enough, keeping the children save for a little longer. But its clear he didn’t believe that there truly could be a future, let alone a good one. he has so very little hope abiut that but at the same time he wants to hope so, so badly, if not for himself then at least for the kids. And ouch that hurts.

Vash trying to sneak off alone, thinking he has to do it all alone. Of course he does. One day you will be at the receiving end and it wont be fun.

Ohh midvalley. Still very intrigued by him. But on the same note, what an unhinged first impression you give knives. But anyway  I think midvalley is actually a lot like Wolfwood. At least in the sense that he is very, very terrified but also has a very good intuition for a situation and danger. He also clearly does not want to be involved in this insanity, less out of a sense of morality but self-preservation. He can feel in his bones how evil and dangerous knives is and he really, really rather not cross his path again but what would be worse is getting on his bad side, so. I guess in a way midvalley is in a very futile situation, not too much unlike Wolfwood. Makes me wanna see an au where midvalley switches sides, if for no other reason than thinking this is more likely to keep him alive. Him and Wolfwood would be so interestig

Well knives seems confident Wolfwood is doing exactly what he wants. Though I’m not sure if that is because knives is so certain about ‘chapels’ loyalty (to the children, that is) or if he thinks it doesn’t really matter how it plays out either way as no matter what, he IS guiding vash and also it IS going to cause him so much pain regardless on how it goes down. Also not sure he even knows ww is the wrong chapel. On one hand, knives is meticulous and damn smart on the other hand I can see him not giving enough of a fuck to realize or maybe worry about it.

Vash and Wolfwood are soo dumb. How are they not dead. Bless milly and meryl. What absolute idiots. Especially vash. you traveled the desert for over a century, you should not make mistakes like that!!

It may be short but some badass milly and meryl moments! Man does meryl look mad. It reminds you that if they are not dealing with basically superpowered people, these two girls are not ones you want to mess with

Wolfwood waving at milly and und the horrified face he makes when she starts crying is so funny. He was just saying hi!!

Goddamn vash is mad and ready to strangle zazie, I’d say with the way he jumped at him (which went great. That was some hilarious rodeo of a worm vash)

It probably wouldn’t have worked out well but man I have no doubt milly would have shot ww. Shes so determinate I love her.

Lots and lots going on. The action and dialog is sometimes a little hard to follow to me. The missle Wolfwood shot into the sky. What was that for? Or was that the same one that hit between vash and hopperd?

Knives. We get to see him some through midvalleys eyes but there is also the shot of vash with a black eye stumbling after him while knives looks… displeased and uncaring at best. And we’ll see how my opinion evolves but I do think already then, knives was rotten to the core with no sympathy and love left. I do not at all think he is a case of born evil or anything. Knives very much was a victim of the circumstances. But what I do think is the whole tesla situation and all broke his innocent mind to a point where for him, there was never a chance of healing, no matter the course his life would have taken. You know what I mean? Maybe I’ll get more into that in another post.

[saltyr3mix]

have I ever told you that second chances had multiple test concepts?

before I decided on empires, I considered Stardew Valley because the original idea for this was an ask game where you put the last character you drew in the last game you played and I thought he would vibe :D

Then, when I decided on empires, I considered making him a ghost in a cursed pendant that llama Owen picked up! The story would have been about him trying to get brought back so he could continue his massacres but being worn down by llama Owen’s stupid antics lol

NO YOU DIDN'T

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

THOSE IDEAS ARE SO SO SO FUN!!!!

I neeeeeeeeeeeed more outsiders x other servers fixing them fics. There was this one fic where they took outsiders and fused it with the maze runner and it was amazing. and like i ADORE ADORE ADORE LOVE ABSOLUTELY FAWN OVER YOUR FIC OF COURSE!!

Cause i love taking messed up characters and sending them on the most painfully complicated fix it arcs. Its literately the plot of both These walls scream your name and Played my game now you're in it. OH! and my new secret wtdw fic only Danger knows about that i wont share for a while. (im going to wait till i have a few chapters before hand ready to post so i don't get behind on it like all my other fics lol.)

ANYWAY

I've also been tossing around more combinations for this kind of au. taking outsiders and putting them in places they shouldn't be. and here are some of the ones i've nearly written but just don't have the time for.

O!Krow in Newlife. just, it's reaction to sparrow would be so funny and also the angst potential in death and hybridizing Krow even further. Also there is one opening to one of the NL episodes where Krow does a Japanese voice over intro that catches me off guard every time i hear it.

O!Bek in SOS smp. Look. Scott, Eloise, and Owen are there but my girl is missing and that makes me just a little bit sad that they can't reach their full chaos potential. its more so to fix them than her at this point. but i also think it would to see O!Bek specifically try to adjust to it all cause shes isn't a big......team player..... to say the least. Which is something that smp relay on big time.

O!Magic on Pirates. i think she deserves a gun. and to kill people. and also think she would be a great apprentice for P!Gracie and would be besties with cruppy. this is less of a lore heavy one and more i just want her safe and happy and also to kill whomever she so desires because she deserves it after everything.

On a similar note on sending people place for the sole sake of letting them kill people, i think sending O!Oeca to the traffic series would just. just think about it. they were made for each other. and you know what. Put O!Mowhee there with him. Just the two of them running around on red just. i don't know man. i think its very fun and that they would thrive.

O!Squidney and O!Spidey i firmly believe should have the pleasure of being in Rats. Just as a treat. just so they can be silly and forget the horrors.

Anyway those were plans i had for another super big grand fic where every outsider got put somewhere new and each chapter centered around them healing. but i quickly realized that's way too big of a project to take on right now and also i don't know enough about servers or enough about every outsider for that.

Hope you like the little exchange in ideas!!! I do really like yours and i have so many i couldn't help but spill some of my own!

(i also may have another little idea for a oneshot sort of inspired by your fic, if i get around to having the free time to write it and you allow inspiration)

[tadpolesonalgae]

Okie i'll copy you for a bit a do the quote for each comment thing so i dont get lost hehe

I don’t know? I think to us as readers of the series I kind of agree, but then he cooperated with the alliance, and also I’m on the side that if anyone should be able to see through his mask it should be the IC since hello Rhysand? UTM? CoN???? The idea of a mask/persona???

honestly this is one of the million problems with acotar because yeah when i say the ic has no way of knowing that eris isn't all bad i mean sjm keeps writing the story like that but you're right it doesn't make any sense. i mean even apart from eris doing literally what rhys has been doing since forever, how am i suppose to believe that mor knows all truth or whatever her powers even are and that rhys is a mind reader, and azriel and amren are supposed to be able to read people so well, that azriel's shadows see things that others don't but they still think eris is as bad as beron. that and both eris and mor kinda have made it seem like there's something else there (i genuinely think sjm planned on making mor and eris mates or something but then people started calling her out on having no diversity and she made mor gay out of nowhere). im also pretty sure its common knowledge in the ic that yes eris dumped her over the border without any other help which sucks but he didn't actually hurt her (that was kier) and one look at the autumn court would be enough to tell them that mor would have been hurt even worse if beron had seen her so how did they not put 2 and 2 together. i guess he still hurt her enough and as her friends they probably wont ever forgive him but it doesnt make sense logically for them to still think eris is the same as beron

This might sound hypercritical or conflictive but I’m not writing/don’t want to write Mor to be a bitch? I like Mor and while it might add to the angst and drama to have her be cruel to reader I just wouldn’t be able to commit to it 😭 In my mind it was Mor acting on the hurt reader has caused her and while it was unnecessary, emotions should be let out?

im sorry to say but mor was in fact a bitch but i get what you're saying like she's justified in her anger (in a way) but yeah trying to make someone who just attempted suicide feel bad about themselves is beyond bitchy. but im saying this as someone who doesn't really like mor most times (to me there's no depth to her character tbh like she was just there as the obligatory female friend for feyre, if you compare how developed cass and az are to mor... yeah she just falls flat idk if its bc cass and az will become the main characters in their books and mor might not get one or if its just not so great writing coming from miss maas once more)

Azriel calling Mor out??? After some of the things he’s said to reader????

i feel like this could be a good turning point though. like imagine azriel heard it and calls her out and has to admit not only to himself but out loud about all the shitty uncalles for comments he's thrown reader's way but even while admitting to it, deciding that he wants to be better to her and calling out mor on her bullshit is one way of doing it. also calling out mor is especially significant because of the whole he was in love with her for 500 years (i refuse to go with sjm's shitty ass "he loved her for 500 years and one day just stopped" bullshit - if she was a decent writer who cared a little more about character growth and plot instead of superficial romance tropes and smut she would write a whole book for azriel with no love interest but of him finding his own way and letting go of his love for mor that lasted for 500 fucking years before ever thinking of making him fall for someone else anyway i digress)

That would be so ooc of reader but I think it would be funny (in theory) for reader to suddenly do a 180° and act with them how she does around Eris and snap something smart and sassy back 😭🤭

i hope the ic gets to see her being herself with eris though and realize they really dont know shit about her

But then also idk how much the ‘thinking loudly’ was amplified by Rhys and Feyre’s bond, so whether it would even apply to reader in that way?

honestly sjm refuses to explain anyone's powers or even how magic works atp so who knows

also i saw another ask of you going in on cc and i would like to join a little. i have to start by saying i havent read the books bc i didn't do anything wrong but from the bits I've seen her writing really has been going downhill and it shows the most in the cc books. i never thought she was an amazing writer tbh like acotar reads to me like a teenager book almost but with smut so it's supposed to be ya and if it wasnt for fanfic i wouldn't be here or even remember the books. i read the first one and already had to skim through some of it but then the 2nd one was a bit more promising, unfortunately the 3rd book was going downhill by the chapter, i dont even like to talk about acosf because how is that supposed to be a book about healing when everyone that's supposed to love nesta treats her like shit and most of it is just smut that does nothing at all for the plot. so im not surprised that not only has cc been having a lot of these critics but also that sjm doubled down on the smut in that book. i also heard some of the characters are kind of copy paste from acotar but again i havent read the books. i honestly dont even know if i'll read any other acotar book because they keep getting worse and whether elain ends up with az or lucien or az with gwyn or elain, i dont think sjm will be able to pull a good book out of it when there's this big mess between all of the characters i mentioned plus her insistence on making the ic act like assholes to each other, creating a found family to make it shitty is just dumb in my opinion, but i know for a fact im not gonna read any of the other sjm series (even though tog is supposed to be the best one) and even if i did i wouldnt touch the modern fantasy if it was the last book on earth tbh. technology ends up taking a lot of the magic out of fantasy and obviously im reading fantasy because i like magical aspects. one of the reasons the later books fell off for me too tbh, she started modernizing things too much (like leggings and cans of soup?? when there are no factories or anything?) like the spring court had so many fun magic things and then velaris was a city with clubs, the moonstone palace and the hewn city felt more magical at times than the court of dreams.

i also agree that one of the biggest problems with the later books is the amount of smut. i like smut as much as the next person and dont mind reading pwp but in fanfictions not in books i pay for and that are written by professional authors. sjm tries less and less to write good characters and to keep up a plot because she knows her fantasy books were one of the first of the "spicy fantasy romance" to become popular and she's not losing that place and smut sells so who cares about a good story? definitely not her.

and with the bryce thing you're absolutely right, from what i've read she acts like a petulant selfish child most of the time and correct me if i'm wrong but she's not supposed to be like 19 like feyre so she's a grown ass woman. and yeah i definitely think sjm made her plus size because again she got called out for having no diversity in her books but treats it really weirdly. im someone who may not be plus size but pretty close to it and the way sjm writes bryce definitely gives me weird vibes. what i've seen most and even some people talk about is that a lot of characters keep mentioning how they're attracted to bryce, like sjm doesnt expect us ymto believe bryce is really hot by the descriptions she's made unless she keeps reminding us that people wanna fuck her. idk it may just be a bit of my trauma reading into it

im sorry if this ran too long im a bit drunk apologies - 🧶

Warnings: CC spoilers!, plus a little more slander, please consider looking away if you like the series! 🧡💛

‘when i say the ic has no way of knowing that eris isn't all bad i mean sjm keeps writing the story like that’

Right? Please miss Maas I want everyone to get along and be happy, let the drama between Eris and Mor be solved so that everyone can be happy and peaceful 😭

‘how am i suppose to believe that mor knows all truth or whatever her powers even are and that rhys is a mind reader, and azriel and amren are supposed to be able to read people so well, that azriel's shadows see things that others don't but they still think eris is as bad as beron.’

Also we’re kind of kept in the dark about specifics too? Mor’s just said to have ‘truth’ but what does that mean!! Can she force people to tell the truth? Can she see things in their true form?? Has she come out of the cave and seen the sun and the shadows it casts???? (Plato’s cave reference 😎)

Like I can understand to a degree why Rhys doesn’t look into people’s minds and appreciate that part of his character—that while he is morally greyish he has his own rules if that makes sense? He has his own perception of right and wrong which makes him interesting? But I might be confusing canon with fanon here 🫣

And yes I can see how miss Maas has written the IC to be flawed and Eris even says how Rhys is blinded by his love for his family so he has trouble seeing truths or discrepancies in those around him?

‘(i genuinely think sjm planned on making mor and eris mates or something but then people started calling her out on having no diversity and she made mor gay out of nowhere).’

Haha I hadn’t thought of it like that!

I’m still unsure what I’d choose between no representation vs. bad representation? On one hand it’s kind of disheartening/irritating to see sexuality used as such a cheap plot point? Unless miss Maas expands on it properly it’ll feel kind of useless to me? But then on the other hand representation is representation, like at least it’s becoming more prevalent in general media? I think another angle is some of the issues with acotar wouldn’t be as problematic as they are if the book series wasn’t so popular? But because it’s liked by so many people it’s also under much more intensive scrutiny when I don’t know if Miss Maas even planned for it to be taken so seriously as it is in some places? Not that the analysis is a bad thing, though, it’s interesting to see different things pointed out if I’d missed them the first time? (Particularly with Emerie and her descriptions of beauty? I hadn’t noticed it in the first read through but then saw some other people pointing it out, as well as other things?)

‘but he didn't actually hurt her (that was kier) and one look at the autumn court would be enough to tell them that mor would have been hurt even worse if beron had seen her so how did they not put 2 and 2 together.’

I suppose while Eris didn’t hurt her, Mor was in an extremely vulnerable position and the with Eris already being from the autumn court it would be easy to make the assumption that he would have inherited the beliefs in his father? Also with the saying of ‘if you’re not part of the solution you’re part of the problem’—I think that’s contextual, but for the sake of the point it’s making, I’m using it here—Eris didn’t do anything to help Mor that we know of, and also according to Mor’s narrative Eris said some cruel things, but then on the other hand since Eris hasn’t done or said anything exactly to contradict what Mor’s said so I’m not going to blame the IC for being protective and standing with her on what was likely an extremely traumatising moment for her? Honestly I guess it would be kind of weird and shitty if they doubted her to be honest 😭

‘im sorry to say but mor was in fact a bitch but i get what you're saying like she's justified in her anger (in a way)’

I expressed myself wrong, sorry 😭

Mor definitely said something bad, but I’m not going to write her in cbmthy to continue making horrid comments like that when nobody else is around, it was kind of a one-off thing so hopefully she won’t be a bitch in the rest of the story, just temporarily 🤭🧡💛

‘yeah trying to make someone who just attempted suicide feel bad about themselves is beyond bitchy.’

Hard agree, I might even have to say it was a little uncalled for 🫣😳🫢

‘to me there's no depth to her character tbh like she was just there as the obligatory female friend for feyre, if you compare how developed cass and az are to mor...’

I think in the books/canon she’s a bit contradictory? Maybe? With how harsh she is with Nesta and how gentle she is with Feyre? I can understand it I suppose, thinking of it through Mor’s perception, but it does sometimes feel like Mor was added just to be the one to add drama to the books? There might be something to say about how Mor and Amren are written as female characters as opposed to the batboys who we’re supposed to like and are romantic interests? Fanon Mor though 🧡💛🫂😭

‘like imagine azriel heard it and calls her out and has to admit not only to himself but out loud about all the shitty uncalles for comments he's thrown reader's way’

Okay so this is something I (maybe unnecessarily? I’m genuinely not sure) want to stretch out for a bit and give it time so it doesn’t magically disappear? With Azriel facing some of the things he’s said to reader and why they were so hurtful to her? I think him knowing she tried to kill herself will speed things up, but only to a certain degree since there’s still a lot they don’t know about one another?

‘i refuse to go with sjm's shitty ass "he loved her for 500 years and one day just stopped" bullshit’

I guess one might be able to argue he was naturally coming out of it already but it there’s no evidence to really support that? I guess it would be difficult to implement it though due to the nature of where the story started and who it follows, but it would have made more sense in my opinion if we somehow got to see Az beginning to lose feelings for Mor, but because that would require something to be set before Feyre came along I guess it would be impossible 😭

‘i hope the ic gets to see her being herself with eris though and realize they really dont know shit about her’

They probably will, however reader is the one who intentionally or not does change how she acts around people? To a certain extent reader does try to act more ‘appropriately’ around them? Like she would never speak to Rhys the way she speaks sometimes to Eris 😭 Though I can imagine it might be funny if she accidentally did and then slapped her hand over her mouth because she hadn’t meant to 😭

‘i never thought she was an amazing writer tbh like acotar reads to me like a teenager book almost but with smut’

I was wondering, did you know anything about acotar before you started reading it? I went in blind since a friend recommended it to me, so I had no idea about how popular it was or anything, but I can see how if someone had heard how hyped up people were about it and then read it, it might fall flat and be super disappointing?

‘but also that sjm doubled down on the smut in that book.’

I know I feel quite strongly that Bryce and Hunt didn’t really have that much of an emotional connection compared to their physical one? Though to be fair I also love seeing emotional vulnerability so maybe it was just a difference in taste? If you’re someone who liked that kind of lust-fuelled romance that’s fine, but personally it wasn’t my cup of tea :/

It also felt like when Bryce and Hunt introduced that ‘no sex’ rule (I think maybe in CC2) it was Miss Maas realising she hadn’t built up and kind of tension between them and had jumped into sex way too quickly and so was trying to dial it back which irritated me? I skipped over I think all of the sex scenes in CC2 because I just wanted them to hurry along and get back to the plot? Also I feel like Miss Maas was trying to make them kind of freaky to appeal to the smutty side, like with the dry humping, the electricity (I think a vibrator might have also been used but I skimmed the scenes so I can’t remember) it was just too much for me when I wanted to read about what was happening and wasn’t interested in their relationship at all 😭

‘i honestly dont even know if i'll read any other acotar book because they keep getting worse’

I know I won’t be reading another CC book and will just wait for someone to very kindly write a summary for it, but I’m desperately hoping she won’t mess up another acotar book 😭

If she does though, isn’t it such a relief we have fanfiction? 😭

‘like the spring court had so many fun magic things and then velaris was a city with clubs, the moonstone palace and the hewn city felt more magical at times than the court of dreams.’

I absolutely adore that factor in fantasy books! I particularly like Holly Black’s version of fae, where they live off the land more and are much more tricky to deal with? More folklore-esque, and I wish we saw more of that kind of thing in acotar 😭 I agree the Spring Court with the will-o-wisps was so lovely—To Old Gods is one of my favourite pieces in that aspect and I want to write and read more of that kind of ancient/slightly mythical/sometimes eldritchy magic 😭

‘i also agree that one of the biggest problems with the later books is the amount of smut. i like smut as much as the next person and dont mind reading pwp but in fanfictions not in books i pay for and that are written by professional authors.’

I used to enjoy reading smut in books (I only started reading regularly and realising I enjoyed it in the past four years) because it was new and exciting but I think now if it’s in professionally written books I absolutely adore it and author has nailed emotional connection? And yes, pwp in fanfiction? Great! Love it! But the amount of smut in CC was unbelievable and I suppose that might be how you feel about acosf? I have to admit I liked it but I think it’s heavily to do with enjoying the characters 😭 Bryce and Hunt in CC? I don’t want to read about that, please spare my eyes 😭😞

‘so who cares about a good story? definitely not her.’

I think I disagree with you here? Maybe? I can’t remember the CC books in particularly great detail? 😭 I think actually for the most part I did find the plot parts a little slow, and Bryce and Hunt made it worse for me, however I loved the ending to CC2, and I enjoyed the asteri story but I think the power levels got out of control? (Don’t even get me started on how Bryce literally doesn’t earn her magic, it infuriates me so much!!! Feyre, Aelin, and Nesta all went through some kind of training and Bryce literally just touches a stone then inherits starlight and has the audacity to say she worked for it? Babes, no.)

And actually with miss Maas being lazy in writing—her using a pill so that Bryce can understand the acotar world was so obviously a deus ex machina. It was so cheap and basic there wasn’t a single amount of thought that went into it.

‘and correct me if i'm wrong but she's not supposed to be like 19 like feyre so she's a grown ass woman.’

Yup. She’s twenty-three 😐

‘what i've seen most and even some people talk about is that a lot of characters keep mentioning how they're attracted to bryce, like sjm doesnt expect us ymto believe bryce is really hot by the descriptions she's made unless she keeps reminding us that people wanna fuck her.’

Honestly that wasn’t that big of an issue for me? Like I get it’s fantasy so I can excuse every love interest and even some who aren’t being attracted to the fmc, but I did definitely have an issue with how lust-fuelled and physical it was 😶‍🌫️

Like with Feyre and Tarquin it’s made clear they’re both attractive/beautiful people but I got the impression that ultimately they liked (?) one another for who they were? To an extent they had a kind of understanding and felt more honest?

‘idk it may just be a bit of my trauma reading into it’

Not sure how much it will help but I’m sending you internet hugs :/ 🫂🫂🫂

‘im sorry if this ran too long im a bit drunk apologies - 🧶’

Haha, don’t apologise it was fun getting to discus all these things with you!! 🧡💛

[timidloner]

can’t believe Joren is canonically a malewife (thank you for confirming in the tag i have ascended) and also a whore (pos) at the same time cause THE TEASING YOU USED IN YOUR EXAMPLE? I DID NOT EXPECT THAT BUT YESSSSS CONFIDENCE WHEN FLIRTING >> people with strength kink are fainting, i am people <3

how did you manage to create such a menace yet one that’s so pure because woah i’m going to need a hurt/comfort with this man please even more with the crying from getting the love of a gentle mc… what inspired to create a masterpiece like him the population needs to know!!

also much luck to you for college, i hope youll like it and it wont be too much in terms of time cause sometimes schedules are just cracked its not even funny. - rambling

Haha! He gives too many malewife vibes, I had to!

And yes, he may be very shy and awkward to ask/give affection, but flirting by showing off is something he can do! Mostly because there's no shame related to his body so he can show it without feeling exposed (no intimacy). But displaying his soft feelings is like revealing his emotional underbelly.

I have this Thing™️ rooted in some other Things™️ that have led me to be very sentimental over characters starved for love, or those who must always stay strong to survive. Bonus points if they're dangerous and they commit atrocities.

I really like it when these big and bad characters are so starved for affection that it becomes their undoing, they're manipulated by someone they love, or they abandon their plans for it, and they die without knowing how it feels to be cared for... It feels very innocent to me, even if these dudes are anything but.

For example, my first great borblo was Kylo Ren when I was in middle school. I liked him because there was something very innocent about seeing him cry and be so desperate to belong somewhere that he fell to the darkside. Hated the other two movies, though. And that comic!

Anyway, when I made Joren I knew I wanted him to have a little air of innocence. It goes hand in hand with what we talked about yesterday! About treating something monstrous with care. I like seeing monstrous characters letting themselves be vulnerable with those they love... which never happens because no one loves them.

That's their great tragedy, which I find very sad and very cute at the same time.

And thank you for the good wishes!! I hope to find people with similar tastes to mine (impossible), and make a lot of friends (achievable). It will be fun to keep this IF going as I go through college, you know, as emotional support, but I better be finished with it before I become a nurse, haha!

[tfw-no-tennis]

tfes thoughtz

not quite a liveblog as I am wont to do but ruth and I watched tf earthspark so I figured id write down scattered thoughts bc who KNOWS when the next eps are dropping and id love to remember what I think of things whenever that rolls around

so let me start off by saying this show is banger. we rlly like it so far awww

still also gotta say rip cyberverse, that show was SO good and died too soon :( 

but yeah I like this show a lot!!! I rlly dig how it looks, I wasn’t sure about the art style/3d animation at first but it looks really good. better than cyberverse if I'm honest (sorry cybv your budget probably wasn’t as good its not ur fault)

I loooove that we’re starting off at an interesting point in which the autobot-decepticon war is over and has been for a while, and megatron is on the same side as the bots, but there’s still conflict....LOVE IT 

cyberverse was also based for having the war going on but in a different way than shows usually did, and having the sides kind of aware of how fruitless the fighting was, and then eventually w the quintessons the two sides had to unite. anyways I have a whole separate post on cyberverse so I should chill 

the human characters are great. I feel like there's the right amount of focus on them and I really dig the family dynamic we’re getting. the kids are cute and fun and I love their relationships w/the bots...I love that mo calls OP “mr optimus” awww

I love the parents also. alex husband of the year he’s so great. and dorothy is so cool and I LOVE her and megatron. they’re like platonic malewife-girlboss. power bffs. 

LOVE how she doesn’t like OP but like megatron. SO funny. 

I really enjoy that the robots aren’t ‘in disguise’ either - the world seems to be aware of them and their existence and the war that went on. that’s cool! I like that a lot; ik the tagline for tf is ‘robots in disguise’ and all but if u think about it they weren’t really hidden in g1 even

Love that there’s comics about the tfs in canon too

I really like this bumblebee!! his design is so cute and I really appreciate that he isn’t ‘the kid’ in this, and has to assume a more mentor-like role. very cool and entertaining

ok and the terrans are adorable. theyre just babies and I love them. I looove how they were adopted into the malto family its so cute. I’m enjoying them and their antics and I feel like there’s a great mix of cute hijinks w/them learning how to be tfs, and also with other plot stuff 

LOOOOVE the plot implications. JUICY!!!!!!!!!! GHOST is so fucking sketchy I LOVE THAT. I love that OP is working for them, and has a sense of ‘I’m doing this for the greater good/this is a means to an end (the end being peace)’ but OP seems to know that GHOST is sketchy as fuck - with him hiding the terrans’ existence and bumblebee being alive from them...but also he tells megatron to give them a chance, which is very OP of him, so that makes sense, but I’m curious if it’ll blow up in his face ((it totally will))

megatron was RIGHT in that one ep where he was trashing GHOST. them having all those cons locked up is bad news. and ruth pointed out that we haven’t even seen who’s in charge of GHOST which is pretty concerning.

also I can’t believe that one agent guy isn’t voiced by will arnett bc he totally sounds like him 

I super loved the flashbacks of the cybertronian history that were animated in g1 style :’) it reminded me of in tfa where they used clips from g1 as part of the history lesson 

I loooove megatron in this show he’s so cool. he gives me some mtmte megatron vibes - he basically says that he agreed to join GHOST/the autobot side in order to protect the cons from worse consequences. I’m interested to hear more about the war and what went on. I’d love some war flashbacks personally

I like that he clearly doesn’t want to hurt the decepticons or hand them over to GHOST, and also the cons think of him as a traitor, but it seems rough for cons out there. what else are they gonna do?

I think it would be epic if they paralleled OP and megatron - with OP joining up with GHOST bc he think he’s doing the right thing for his species and humans, only to discover that GHOST is fr bad news - and megatron binding himself to service w/GHOST and the autobots in exchange for supposed safety (?or something? Not super clear what the cons/megatron got out of that bargain) for the cons, only to discover (as he basically already did) that the cons aren’t doing great out there and they think of him as a traitor

also mandroid is actually pretty interesting for a human villain. I was expecting not to like him (espec at the beginning, he reminded me of silas from tfp who ended up being a nuisance and didn’t really have a point in the plot imo) bc tf human villains are more often miss than hit but he’s interesting 

I like that he has pretty legit reasons to want to get rid of the “invasive species” (as a biologist I love that phrasing), after he got drafted into the war and then injured in friendly fire

LOVED the part where he talks about this and dot is like ‘yeah I also got injured in the war and that sucks for us but I’m judging you based on your actions and YOU suck’ that was so epic she’s so epic and cool

and he knows alex??? ?? fruity ????? are they exes??? whats the vibe. I bet alex used to work for GHOST and that’s how he and dot met

having a whole ass giant robot arm is wild tho. no way that’s how it works bro 

also what happened to swindle. he was so funny. he sounds like meowth from the 4kidz dub lmfao 

SOUNDWAVE BRO I fucking love him. icon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am SO happy that his cassettes are here and actually turn into cassettes and not other more modern stuff. I love that anachronism sm 

thank god frenzy is here. I hope rumble shows up too (tho bumblebee talking about how one of the cassettes exploded ???? hi????)

we saw starscream for like 0.2 seconds but I’m ready for him to cause havoc like the annoying bitch he is <333 

super interesting that the world is cut off from cybertron and has been for quite a while. I think OP also mentioned that the cybertronians on earth are likely the last of their kind - I’m curious if that’s true or if there’s a bunch of them on cybertron a la the 1984 movie. I bet there is, no way cybertron is empty. pleaseeee I want hot rod and ultra magnus and all them I’d cry 

also congrats to skywarp and nova storm and frenzy on the transgenderism <3 

oh yeah and I LOVE arcee. she’s like Question Authority Barbie. Bite Chomp Kill Barbie. SO good. I love her design and alt mode and how she taught the kids not to blindly follow the people in charge. ICON. 

the 3 new bots are cute, but ruth and I couldn’t get over the fact that they were born and then IMMEDIATELY thrown into a conflict before even getting alt modes. omg 

ruth: ‘they already have blue hair and pronouns tho!’

LMFAO TRUTH. I LOVEEEE that nightshade goes by they/them :’) we didn’t expect that at all and it was such a good surprise 

also hashtag gay???? #GAY???? 

can’t BELIEVE that bot is named hashtag. immmmmm 

tho ruth and I both agree that the cast is full enough and having 3 new terrans might be too much, so we’ll see how that goes - I kinda feel like they’ll end up more on the periphery and only show up sometimes. we’ll see tho! 

holy SHIT the fight scenes bro. specifically in the last 2 eps, oh my GOD. SOOOO fucking juicy. I’m gonna make a separate post abt that but they were EXCELLENT. one place I think cyberverse was weak in was the fight scenes - in s1 I would say they were actively boring (sorry cybv ily) and they got better but still were a bit clunky and awkward and formulaic. I feel like it was due to animation/budget constrictions more than anything 

but yeah these fights scenes rocked. I especially love the 2d smoke and fire effects 

I just wanna know more about the war too!!! like mandroid got injured, it seems, from friendly fire - did Dot as well? is that why she doesn’t seem to like or trust OP as much? 

also megatron has been working w them for 15 years - what were the previous 15 years like? what was the war like? why were they fighting? what exactly made them stop? how many other tfs are on earth? when did GHOST start being a thing? are there gonna be combiners???? I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS. 

biggest Q is when are the next eps coming out. pls not in like 6 mos. 

also w the fight scenes. skywarp’s warping looks SO FUCKING COOOOOL I’m so glad. yesssss 

I feel kinda bad for the cons tbh. they seem scattered and lost, with no real leader, and they’re apparently disappearing (presumably mandroid) or being imprisoned by GHOST, who I'm SURE doesn’t have any ill intentions...I wonder if the show will continue to take a more sympathetic approach to the cons (kinda like mtmte, where they kinda had a point at the beginning before they lost the thread w/all the murdering and whatnot)

also I love everyone’s designs generally but I still think OPs face looks weird hgfajkdfksjndfkj whenever he has the faceplate off I'm like Put That Back On Please. 

I like that the humans are directly involved in the plot in a way that makes sense bc the human world has already been to war with/alongside the tfs, so there are a ton of different relationships that humans can have w/the tfs. this is way more interesting than st like tfp, which I think did a pretty bad job integrating the humans, or tfa, which had Sari w/a macguffin that was plot-important in order to keep her involved 

tbf that’s kinda going on w/the kids having links to the terrans but I like the way it’s played out so far. I love the suggestions of lore we’ve gotten too, w/quintus prime and stuff

also they’ve made a point of showing that symbol in the cave where the terrans were born MORE THAN ONCE, and it totally looks like those spiderbots, so I’m thinking there’s definitely a connection there. something weird is going on 

ok also SUPER fucking funny that wheeljack showed up and found out he kinda has a kid and IMMEDIATELY decides he’s a deadbeat dad hvbkjdsfbjksandfkl. I mean he came around in the end but that was so fucking funny. PLEASE SIR 

when they bonded by shooting at each other (lmao? classic tfs) and then twitch was like aww lets hug and he didn’t even notice lmfao sir plssss 

I wonder if the dinobots will show up and if they’ll still have been created by wheeljack (and ratchet) like in g1 

also kind of hilarious how megatron was like ‘no I don’t wanna hurt the cassettes’ and then when the seekers attacked he was like ‘fuck them kids’ and went all out fighting them lmao 

I’m super curious how the megatron starscream dynamic will be in this show 

oh yeah and ruth pointed out that it’s interesting that the three new terrans are bigger than the original 2 terrans and I feel like it’s bc they were created DURING an active conflict and basically got MTO’d into a fight. Ls 

firstborn vs secondborn vibes lmfao 

ok and quintus prime....r we gonna get quintessons. hello. I would LOVE that the quintessons are like my fav antagonists (especially in cyberverse they were so good. man I should rewatch cyberverse) 

I think the quintessons are perfect villains for cases like this where the autobots and decepticons aren’t fighting each other. I’d love to see the quintessons as the villains after GHOST is dealt with 

maybe the tfs on cybertron are already dealing w/the quintessons? 

omfg and the ep where bumblebee is trying to call OPs comm and megatron and then elita pick up instead ?? hello ??? polycule?????

I wanna see more of elita 1 too! shes so cool 

also I kinda belatedly realized that this megatron doesn’t seem to have the same dislike for organics/earth people as he does in a lot of other media (most notably in idw1). that’s interesting and I like that we’re exploring a different side of his character, and I like seeing humans hanging with him. he and dot are great and I hope we get more of them, including flashbacks

anywaysss that’s all the thoughts I have for now, tune in for more next time byeeee

[alivehouse]

just wondering why you dislike Neil gaiman so much?? not trying to criticize or defend him, just curious

gghhhhh

(this is all just going to be based on good omens related stuff bc i havent really willingly interacted with any other work of his since i was like 12 he is not a great writer imo)

ok before i get into why specifically the way he uses his socials annoys me so much i just want to mention that good omens (tv show) has a serious problem with treating its characters of color poorly/as disposable (which this post goes into) and as far as i know neil has never so much as acknowledged this let alone apologize for it so theres that

but as for why i hate his social media presence specifically so much i just think the way he interacts with his fanbase is annoying & i dont want to use the term 'gaslighting' for something this stupid but i dont even know how else to describe his habit of like. pretending he wrote aziraphale and crowley in a relationship for the sake of clout?

^ he used to regularly regularly say condescending no homo shit like this but then when he realized he could get attention for pretending he wrote queer characters he pulled a 180 and started going 'ohhhh i DID write them in a relationship actually and also trans and also nonbinary i cant believe you didnt GET it just because its SUBTLE im sorry half assed vaguely subtextual scene #5 was not enough for you stupid fa- i mean people'

and he does this shit constantlyyyy and gets no flack for it. in fact a lot of his fanbase encourages it even bc were still stuck on begging for word of god scraps from rich straight men instead of engaging with work made by actual queer people i guess. (ALSO THIS TWEET SPECIFICALLY IS REALLY FUNNY bc like a month later he lied about there being a secret handholding scene in the show to send people on a wild goose chase zooming in on shit trying to find anything just to give him more streams i guess i dont know i think it was a stupid thing to even fall for honestly but it still strikes me as kind of cruel)

i mentioned this in tags before & idk if he still does this but he used to go look up his own name on here to find people talking negatively about him so he could reblog it and get them dogpiled which is why you see people talking negatively about him calling him 'neilman' so much instead of his actual searchable name. literal full grown man picking fights with random people on here bc he knows hell win since hes a famous author and will get backed up no matter what

and ok this is edging into fandom circlejerking (i think hes only said this one a few times but his fanbase brings it up constantly to shield him from any criticisms) so i wont go into this as much as i could but theres this Thing hell do where he says they cant be gay bc they technically arent men bc they arent humans (based on a bit in the book where they feel the need to specify that aziraphale is NOT ACTUALLY GAY after continuously subjecting him to homophobic language/aggression) and people will bend over backwards trying to interpret this as meaning they are canon nonbinary and Epic Trans Rep and hell vaguely encourage this instead of like acknowledging the extended man-in-a-dress evil nanny bit in the show and pointing out that it was fucked up? & honestly the whole undertone of that is like 'this character might go out of their way to look like and dress like and act like and refer to himself as a man but he cant REALLY be a man because he wasnt Created That Way' like how the fuck am i supposed to be treating this as a trans positive read of the situation lmao. not to mention the 'inhuman = nonbinary,' 'nonbinary = CANT be gay!!! there are no gay nonbinary people i guess' legwork going on here going on here i dont know its a whole mess

PLUS i just think its funny that hes said making characters gay would be disrespectful to his deceased cowriter but pulling an entire second out of his ass for that sweet amazon money apparently isnt lmao

and to finish this off just for fun heres him at the start of the pandemic when there was a crazy high rising death toll making it about his fucking book, + him answering another ask in response to that AFTER he had deleted the original post, to make the person asking him look like they were attacking him for no reason:

[rachelianello]

Officially six months seizure free!...Again. I won't ever drive again. I just don't want something to happen while I am driving and harm anyone that is on the road near me. I don't like driving anyways. I also have neuropathy. Pins and needles in my legs and feet times a million at first. I couldn't walk the pain was so bad. I couldn't even stand. Three weeks later after being in the hospital for a week a fucking MRI with some drug that calmed me down I was diagnosed with neuropathy which I already said. I was transferred to a in patient physical rehab facility for two weeks. The rain was still so bad and standing hurt. I couldn't even shower myself. Those two weeks with those therapist meant more that anything to more. Yes did I have to use a walker and a wheelchair after I got out? Absolutely. It has been a year not and I don't need to use my walker and I use my wheelchair to walk/jog around my neighborhood with my little puppy dog Otto. I went so long without being able to do anything like that. I just use my wheelchair for balance. I am not trying to walk around my neighborhood and fall down and scrape my knees. I mean, lets be real, I am not a ripe banana anymore just one with a lot of brown spots but more yellow. ALSO, IF I EVER HEAR ANYONE TELL ME THAT THEIR LEG FELL ASLEEP OR THEIR ARM AND THEY FEEL PINS AND NEEDLES AND IT HURTS. WHAT A JOKE. MY FEET WILL FEEL THAT WAY FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE AND I AM USED TO IT. MY MEDICATION HELPS BUT IT DOESN'T MAKE IT GO AWAY. My bad but don't be a little bitch, bro. Anyways....THANKYOU MOTHERFUCKING MISSOURI FOR LEGALIZING MARIJUANA.

I was very close to getting my medicinal card but my dealer always hooked me up. They still do but there is nothing better than walking as slow as I can into a dispensary and picking out what I want. My primary care Doc and all my other specialist ask if I smoke and I tell them, "Just Mary Jane." They look at me and say, "Well, its not illegal so I can't tell you not to and your oxygen/breathing is great. I am glad to helps." My gynecologist, neourologist, seizure doc and all the other docs I see say the same.

Still take my meds. Honestly, The first time had a seizure was the scariest. Not because I was in pain but I was at work and fell down and hit my head so hard. I can't believe I didn't break my glasses. Luckily I had so many employees around me to help. Not trying to toot my own horn but I was a pretty badass Kitchen Manager. I thought anyways. I tried my best. I was carried out for my first ride on the ambulance and the only thing I can remember was my General Manager asking me to call my best friend Kamryn and I said yes. My General Manager never stopped taking food orders. More than half the staff walked out that night. Saturday, February 19th 2021 9PM...Buffalo Wild Wings. My best friend was at the hospital before I even was even though I was rushed on the ambulance. I had covid to haha. If I knew that I would have never went to work but I needed to be at work for that seizure to happen. What would I have done if I was at home where I lived alone and that happened to me?

That was long. I don't care care if anyone reads this but PLEASE STOP MAKING FUN OF PEOPLE THAT HAVE SEIZURES OR ANY OTHER MEDICAL CONDITIONS. IT'S NOT FUNNY. IT DOESN'T ONLY MAKE SOMEONE FEEL BAD ABOUT THEMSELVES..ESPECIALLY SOMETHING THEY CAN'T CONTROL BUT IT IS SO SCARY FOR ANYONE AROUNT THEM TO WITNESS IT.

I PROMISE, NO ONE IS LAUGHING ABOUT YOUR IGNORANCE. IF YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW HOW IT FEELS BEING IN THE HOSPITAL..GETTING POKED BY MULTIPLE NEEDLES, (EVERY HOUR..ESPECIALLY RIGHT WHEN YOU FALL ASLEEP AND INSTANTLY WAKE UP AGAIN) HAVING SOMEONE WATCH YOU SHIT, WEARING A DIAPER AND PEEING YOUR PANTS, NOT ALLOWED ANY FRIENDS/FAMILY TO SEE YOU, NOT BEING ABLE TO SHOWER FOR A WEEK, LET ME KNOW. IF YOU WANT TO TAKE MEDICATION FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFT THATS PRETTY FUCKING AWESOME. IF ONE DAY YOU DON'T TAKE IT YOU WILL IMMEDIATELY HOPE THAT WHO WONT HAVE A SEIZURE THAT DAY. I have dreams of anyone that I am helping someone having a seizure.

Moral of this post. Please, be a kind human. You never know what someone is going though.

[300iqprower]

A character I mentioned getting screwed over by Fate due to wafiu-ism is Medb, but another that got completely screwed over is Penthesilea, and unlike Medb, I can't really identify why. She got given a bad deal in being introduced in Agatha but she is probably one of the easiest characters to drag out that dumpster fire, there is so many ways to take her character and so many relationships she has to other characters. She and Asclepius shared a writer, he must have seen that it was Penthesilea nephew, Hippolytus, that was raised from the dead, why doesn't she comment on that? In most versions of the story it is the Amazons, lead most likely by her, that accidently kill Hippolytus's mother, in this case most likely Antiope, shouldn't that be addressed? She must feel a lot of guilt over that. She is Romulus's half sister but they don't have voice lines for each other. Penthesilea is a character that had and still has a lot of ways to be explored, but they keep on focusing on this hatred of Achilles for what was a comment that doesn't really matter and it just annoys me, and TM can still do it, they can still expand on her character but it seems like they don't want to. I just wish more people would be able to appreciate who Penthesilea is as a character, the amazoness event was a good start, showing her leadership skills and also it was funny, but I just wish their was more. Also she doesn't have her iconic leopard skin cape, which is lame, give her the damn cape, it might be petty, but it shows how good of a fighter she is!

Sorry this took a while to get back to but I had to look into Penth's myths more. I knew a lot less about the Amazonians than I thought, like the fact they get their name from the belief they would cut off a breast so they could better use a longbow. Holy shit that is metal.

I feel like Penth is a character torn between Nasu's obvious adoration of greek mythology and FGO's priority of making sure there's not such thing as a strong independent female character who doesn't have some sort of caveat that makes it so they wont "Scare off" the (believed) target whale audience of insecure men. The end result is a character with a lot of qualifiers and self contradictions that are best resolved by sweeping her under the rug entirely.

I'm not against the idea of her being obsessively angry with Achilles; there's a ton of potential in that and if done right it wouldn't just boil down to "Oh this character is a badass bc we want to make sure you know this other character is an even better SUPER MEGA badass" unlike......actually I was gonna give a snarky "cough X cough" example but there's too many to pick from. Regardless, this post does a great job outlining what i mean and goes a step beyond by framing it in fate specific lore.

But they obviously didn't do that in the game. She never even had enough substance to commit to that level of deeper meaning (though the stuff that post talks about is very much hinted at in her dialogue) and that's because of the aforementioned "just pretend it doesn't exist" approach to an amazonian queen and how it's at odds with the gacha status quo. Not a real status quo, mind you, I think I speak for all of good taste when I say if Penth was a take no shit unflappable badass commander I would love her more for it not less. I'm talking about this ASSUMED belief on the part of those wringing money out of things that the only market is straight insecure men who want someone to be dependent on them. I'm sure you already know this and that it's exactly what you meant by "screwed over by waifuism" but I want to outline it because it makes clear just how at odds a character like Penth is. Her design, her mannerisms, her story relevance or rather lackthereof, all of it is them trying their damndest to skirt around the obvious. To restate what i've said time and again, these things aren't always inherently issues, but things that would normally be innocuous become problematic when you know there is a specific malicious intent.

In fact that's exactly why even though as I said her hatred for Achilles could be an incredible point of depth, it still ends up being on the list of problematic things with her.

Penth is obsessed with a man, and she specifically hates him, and even though she's clearly shown to not hate all men, her character is hyperfocused on that hatred of Achilles in order to make it "special" that she doesn't hate you (with the game as per usual being written with a clear assumption that the player is male); her 4th ascencion and bond 5 lines post name reveal are EXTREMELY on the nose about this, basically labeling you "the exception" to her not wanting to be seen as a women first and foremost, and portraying her desire for otherwise to be childish and naive.

Which brings me to the part that killed my interest in her as a character. She's retroactively de-aged which, on top of just being fucked up and so very very problematic for completely standalone reasons, means they can have their cake and eat it regarding her design. She's fixated on the events that happened at the end of her life how they define who she is, yet they don't have to actually portray her as that person. Supposedly she pulled a liz because she doesn't want to be seen as the same beautiful person Achilles fell in love with. She wants to be seen as a warrior first and foremost. Ok, if she's obsessed with being seen as a warrior then why doesnt she wear any armor? Why doesn't she have her golden belt, or her famous leopard pelt, or her crescent shield, or her helm? I'm fine with her not wielding a bow or lance, in fact IMO her (afaik completely original) ball and chain wielding along with the claws is easily her best aspect in terms of character design. But not even a mention of archery, the thing from which the amazons got their name? I'm not asking to show a mutilated chest or something, if she's younger and doesn't yet have to worry about that sort of thing that's a chance to have your cake and eat in a GOOD way! (and obviously ILR breasts are not going to be an issue with archery but baseless myths like that have affected character design before so...) But again, they don't do any of that. She's barely got anything on and nothing indicative of warrior status aside from the weapons themselves, which is such a blatant contradiction of their own in-universe reason for her appearance. If she's so obsessed with looking like a warrior, why is she wearing almost nothing and her FA is a stereotypical "undressing by waterside" portrait? Actually I know why, it's in addition to stupid eye candy garbage to the convey that this is an act, that she's obsessed with being this perfect warrior but at the end of the day under that nonexistent armor is a human being like anyone else. The mask has to come off eventually...

...even though what she aspires to doesn't have to be inherently wrong or something to live in denial of. Which brings me to the last, and arguably even more damning aspect. She's portrayed as childishly wrong. They emphasize her anger as something along the lines of denying reality and "going through a phase" even if they state otherwise. They try and dress it up with materials and such but there's a very clear tone of bullheaded recklessness she's written with, like someone who won't admit they're wrong and instead pushes back violently against being challenged. She's portrayed as arrogant, not proud. She's portrayed as brash, not determined. She's portrayed as in denial, rather than rightfully frustrated. She's portrayed as if she's a stubborn child who is in the wrong, and her one true story role having her be...THAT in agartha really makes that even more overt.

Penth COULD be an amazing character as you and that post point out. She COULD be an absolute badass with her own identity and expand on her in a dozen different ways without losing anything. But they won't, because that's not their intention. They don't WANT to write her as the best character she could be because that would go against the perceived market they're trying to cater. They would never admit it, but she's written condescendingly. Because in the context of a waifu obsessed gacha, she is patronized simply by existing.

[dballzposting]

Do you know what I mean about Mr Satan. He has a very specific physcial presence. If you were his daughter or granddaughter then you would know him for his huge size, the feel of his whiskers, the dark and warm tone of his skin, the hair on his arms, his impossibly large hands (that as a child, it took your whole hand to wrap around his one pinkie finger), his warm hugs, the smell of smoke on his clothes and breath. The way that when you get to be an adult you can see all the ways that hes only ever been a child.

If you had a father like that (which I kind of think is most fathers) then you know what I'm saying .... the physcial impression that he leaves in this world and in your senses.

He is somebody's father and he has a deep and husky voice that CARRIES, no matter the noise you're yelling over.

And this is the man who drinks beer and smokes cigars and hangs out with his guy friend Majin Buu in the way that middle aged men do.

But also. His wife is dead and his daughter has grown and moved out and so it's literally just him and his guy friend and their dog all day every day in that huge fucking house.

With no women in the house they're free to do things like: make messes and not pick them up, walk around naked, say misogynistic things, do stupid and childish things with the decor, believe that they can only do this becasue there are no women in the house becasue they believe that a woman's role is to stop them from having fun, etc .......

But that's really all just Mr Satan. Majin Buu isnt a typical guy friend becasue hes well you know. Hes straight up Majin Buu.

Mr Satan is a man who never grew up inside whereas Majin Buu is presumably a mature organism but the way he is is just childish? Is he a sort of man child? You know what I mean. Mr Satan is one of those men who is a wounded boy inside and it disrupts all mature operations hence forth. That's most modern fathers I feel like. But Majin Buu is honestly like a child but not but he is but hes not? Hes not human, not even close, is it comparable? Does he have the wisdom of a child?

It doesnt matter becasue you're not in their circle of friends. You dont know if they bathe together in great humour and fun and comradeire, like frat boys, like men; or if they dont bathe together, because Mr Satan wants his privacy, becasue hes funny about that sort of thing in the way that self-fearing people are, becasue he doesnt want anyone to think that they're gay. Majin Buu doesnt know what gay is. If he did comprehend it he would fail to see the relevance. But he tends to just listen to whatever Mr Satan says.

Maybe Mr Satan gets to have a best friend and hes giddy and childlike about it, experiencing those sorts of carefree joys after a long hard life of expectations and armoring against others (for fear they find out that he sort of sucks).

Or maybe instead hes still kind of self-fearing and repressed and when he and Buu are alone in the hot tub 5 feet apart theres a moment where the laughter suddenly stops and Mr Satan looks relaly serious and he says something like "hey look. I just want to be clear and up front. I'm on the straight and narrow, you understand what I mean? I mean I dont swing any other way but the way that God intended. Now I understand that things can get wild during a night out with the boys. But I dont play with that fag stuff. Not even as a joke. I dont find it very funny. Just wanted to make myself clear. If you and I are going to be cool then we have to respect that unspoken line. You stay over there and I'll stay over here. And no matter how crazy the night gets I want you to promise that you'll respect that. Can you do that for me? No matter how many drinks I get in me, no matter what I say - I want you to respect that. No matter what I say or where the night goes. I want you to promise that no matter what I say, you wont ever let anything homo go on between us. No matter what I say. You promise?" and majin buu just cocks his head and hes not understanding any of that at all but he promises becasue Mr Satan pressures him to and then after he tries to ask "but what-" but mr Satan says "SHHH. Shhh. Dont talk about it. Forget about it. It's not happening. Itll never happen. Dont make this harder than it already is." And Buu still is like ... Huh?.........

OR maybe the way that Majin Buu is like a big ole softie/teddy bear/kid is on the forefront and respected and Mr Satan gets to experience the joy of having a childhood best friend which for all we know he never ever got to have , and i think that he just wants to free his inner child too; and they really do take bubble baths and shit hard together and stuff. I havent seen much of DBS so I dont know what happens really....

I dont know which is funnier so I cant decide ......

Mr Satan and Majin Buu are guy friends and they will have conversations that are evidently uproarious becasue you can hear their laughter from across the house, Mr Satan will be in the shower peeing and drinking beer and laughing in his cacophonous way and Majin Buu will be on standby Not drinking beer becasue it's YUCKY but hes there in the bathroom doing who knows maybe sitting on the toilet . But hes there and they are laughing and carrying on

They also watch TV, such as pro wrestling. And they watch the Power Puff Girls.

They also spend a lot of time apart doing their own things, but they make room for the other in the home & and in their hearts and minds, and they will ask the other how their day was.

They also go frolicking in fields of flowers.

They also smoke cigars and hang out all masculine-like.

There are no meaningful differences between these events

[the-ghost-king]

wait Apollo isn’t originally greek? thats so interesting 👀👀

Where ever did you hear that? /ij

Definitely putting all of this under a read more, it’s a long one!

Cw: Greek statues, they're naked :/

But yeah, Apollo was actually an inherited god, it’s likely that because of this as well he was a blending of multiple different gods to some extent. It’s also good to note that Apollo’s name is unknown, meaning that nobody really knows what exactly Apollo means, which is pretty weird all things considered about the Greeks who placed such importance on the god’s forenames (ie, phoebeus, acestor, age’tor, etc). 

"Though Apollo was the most Hellenic of all gods, he derived mostly from a type of god that originated in Anatolia and spread to Egypt by way of Syria and Palestine." (X)

There’s a couple of different things which point to Apollo being a Anatolian god (or being of, coming from him) named Appaliunas, and it is said they were on opposite sides of a war most beloved of their people during the fight. It’s important to note that it’s believed Appaliunas means “father light” and that he shows some level of importance over drafting peace treaties (which Apollo has some reputation in as the bringer of civilized order). We don't know too much about their connections however, because the documents are incomplete.

This theory also makes sense, because the name Leto (Apollo’s mother) is Lydian in origin, and there’s decent connections to her having been worshiped on the coast's of Asia Minor. And it is known the Greeks have adopted Anatolian gods into their religion before, see Cybele (sometimes called Cybele-Rhea), and the origin of Kore (later Persephone). There's stuff which points also to an Anatolian goddess called "Artimu" (Artemis) who is often confused to Cybele for some reason, and again this bears connections to the Lydians which worshipped Leto. There's information which points to Hekate being a goddess from Anatolia as well, which shows significance considering she is Apollo and Artemis's cousin (leading to my personal question of was Phoebe Anatolian in origin?). Apollo's divine number being 7 shows Babylonian or at least Mesopotamian Origin.

The Geographical location of these two places also bears similarities, they are close to one another, and it's known the Greeks had decent travel capabilities over water. There's also the fact that both of these lands border Troy, which is shown to have significant values in Greek culture and mythology, as well as the Greek belief that the Anatolian gods were present at Troy as well as the Greek gods.

(It's also notable the similarities in naming traditions, Alaksandu for one such example, does not sound too far off from the later Latin name Alexander, which came from the Greek name Aléxandros).

The other possible origin given for Apollo is Aplu (Apulu), a Hurrian god (of people who lived in Anatolia, Syria, and Northern Mesopotamia). Aplu and Apollo bear semblance to one another in more than name, Aplu was the god of plague (bringer of the plague more specifically) and he bears a large amount of resemblance to Apollo Parno'pius/Smitheus and Aplu's main story provides reasoning as to why Apollo may also be the god of healing and Medicine.

The story of Aplu involves the idea that the individual which brings the plague, must also be the one to banish it. This makes Aplu both bringer of plague(s) but also, protector from plague(s). From this we learn Aplu's name means "son of" (please note here Apollo's iconographic connections to "youth" and "sonship" among the Greeks, as the god of kouros), but the connection of "the son of" was a title granted also to the god Nergal (worshiped by many different people(s) across Mesopotamia) who is at least in part someone who holds power over the sun, and holds connection to Shamash (Utu).

Aplu is also often depicted naked (ya know) but wearing a laurel leaf, and part of a cloak... It's funny how these images are Apollo though:

Aplu is also symbolized by a staff and laurel a twig(s), while we know Apollo to be associated closely with the laurel because of Daphne, and Apollo having iconography related to staffs involves him giving his away to Hermes- which perhaps has to do with the caduceus being interpreted as the symbol for medicine, or the connection of Apollo to Asclepius and the rod of Asclepius.

Aplu isn't isolated necessarily either, there is also the Etruscan goddess Aritimi (Artume, Artames, or Artumes) and she oversees animals, human assemblies, and is considered a hunting deity. As well as scrolling through this list, you'll note more than one Greek/Roman mythological figure.

There's also a ton of stuff from Etruscan mythology (Hurrian mythology is just a subsect of Etruscan mythology) which overlaps with Greek mythology, some sources even state Etruscan -> Greek -> Roman mythology (I wont comment on that because I don't know well enough).

There's some other places Apollo's name might have come from, but those are probably the two most likely under the assumption that Apollo is a collective of many gods.

These are the specifics of the Anatolian god's Apollo may be born of/from, but there's a variety of things which point to him and mythology around him being of other origins as well (Minoan, Dorian, and Proto-Indo-European... yeah)

You may have heard one of Apollo's sacred animals is dolphins, Apollo Delphinios/Delphidios, this is because of a Minoan god named Paiawon (Paion) who was worshiped on Crete and also originated in Delphi. In the second part of Homeric hymn to Apollo, Apollo would transform his shape into that of a dolphin and carry the new priests to Delphi for the transfer of religious practices:

"Phoebus Apollo pondered in his heart what men he should bring in to be his ministers in sacrifice and to serve him in rocky Pytho. And while he considered this, he became aware of a swift ship upon the wine-like sea in which were many men and goodly, Cretans... Phoebus Apollo met them: in the open sea he sprang upon their swift ship, like a dolphin in shape, and lay there, a great and awesome monster, and none of them gave heed so as to understand but they sought to cast the dolphin overboard. But he kept shaking the black ship every way and making the timbers quiver. So they sat silent in their craft for fear, and... so they kept sailing on; for a rushing south wind hurried on the swift ship from behind... They wished to put their ship to shore, and land and comprehend the great marvel and see with their eyes whether the [dolphin] would remain upon the deck of the hollow ship, or spring back into the briny deep where fishes shoal. But the well-built ship would not obey the helm, but went on its way all along Peloponnesus and the lord, far-working Apollo, guided it easily with the breath of the breeze..." (X)

Apollo Delphinios was largely only worshiped by people of Crete and surrounding islands, but this is also largely where Paiawon was worshiped as well. There's also many things from early Grecian history which simply state Apollo to be Paiawon or of Paiawon, or at least doesn't bother to specify which god is being talked about.

In the earlier parts of Greek history, seventh-sixth century, there was distinctions made between the pair:

"and in Solon's opinion it is Apollo who makes a man a μάντις (soothsayer) but healers do the work of Paion" (X)

The whole thing with Apollo being descended from Paiawon however, is that Paiawon may not be Minoan but Mycenaean in origin, which means even if Apollo is originated in Minoan culture one of the gods who has influenced that origin wasn't even necessarily Minoan but taken in. Others believe Paiawon was Minoan or Aegean in origin but very far in the past, since his songs used a meter of pre-Greek origin.

You'll also not the commonalities between Paion (a spelling of Paiawon) and Paean (also spelled Paian), Apollo's original name according to Homer. It could mean a variety of things but "who heals illnesses through magic" and "pre-greek" are the most common translations of the word Paean, but it is also associated with music (most specifically a song sung by Thetlas who cured the Spartans) and is said to denote hymns for Apollo.

"PAEAN, that is, "the healing," is according to Homer the designation of the physician of the Olympian gods, who heals, for example, the wounded Ares and Hades. After the time of Homer and Hesiod, the word Paian becomes a surname of Asclepius, the god who had the power of healing. The name was, however, used also in the more general sense of deliverer from any evil or calamity, and was thus applied to Apollo and Thanatos, or Death, who are conceived as delivering men from the pains and sorrows of life... From Apollo himself the name Paean was transferred to the song dedicated to him, that is, to hymns chanted to Apollo for the purpose of averting an evil, and to warlike songs, which were sung before or during a battle." (X)

In regards to the possibility of Apollo having been of Minoan origin, one must consider not only his origins but the origins of the gods and goddesses around him and how they may have developed over time.

In this case Britomartis (Diktynna) is of particular interest, she was the Minoan "mistress of animals", she was a goddess (or sometimes nymph, or oread) of the mountains and the hunt. There's points to the name meaning "sweet maiden" or other similar things, but it is debatable.

Eventually Britomartis would become the goddess of nets in Hellenic myths, and would simply be closely identified with the goddess of Artemis. However, to the Minoans Britomartis wandered alongside a bow-wielding male hunter who's name has been lost, it is likely that aspects of this hunter were absorbed into Apollo; when the introduction of worshiping Artemis was brought to the island of Crete where Britomartis was also worshiped they were compared and quickly said to be of one another.

It is also said in some variations the myths of Britomartis that she was taken to the mainland in the nets of men after fleeing Minos, this seems like a euphemism for her as a goddess of worship being brought by fisherman to mainland and taken into their culture and worship, more so than it sounds like a goddess's story. Perhaps this led to her becoming Artemis, although most myths seem to agree Artemis gave Britomartis immortality... So who knows, but it's a point of particular interest for me.

Also I know I mentioned proto-indo-european origins for Apollo and I could analyze gods and goddesses relating to Apollo being a Minoan god like Aphaea, but I am not going to lie I am rather sick mostly of sourcing everything and I don't like to talk about stuff without stuff to back me up because I don't want to come across like I'm pulling information or ideas out of thin air because that's how misinformation spreads... But yeah, here's a somewhat simplified piece on Apollo's possible origins as a pre-Hellenistic god, and I hope you enjoy because I know you sent the ask a bit ago <3

[stxleslyds]

Robin Jason, a friend and ally of the Titans.

PART 1.

Last Friday I was feeling extra rage-y after the news about the Titans mini with the Titans show line-up of heroes. I still think that a) Jason shouldn’t be considered a Titan or be in the team as Red Hood and b) that him going back to wearing a bat symbol on his chest is just bad but as @randomlut said there is a possibility of that book not being set in DC’s current universe and if that’s the case then okay, I will not complain about it anymore.

But this post isn’t about that Titans book it’s about Jason’s Robin’s appearances in volume two of the New Teen Titans!

Now, this won’t be an in-depth review of those issues from a story point of view, it will be a post in which I talk about Jason’s characterization and interactions with the Titans. Maybe I will even dive a little bit into why I think that the interactions that Jason and Roy have in those issues makes the relationship that they had in New52 very out of place.

Let’s begin!

·         NTT (1984) #19

Jason as Robin appears here only in the last page of the issue. After the current team of the Titans appears to be falling apart Donna calls Jason and others to help in a mission, this team that she puts together resembles the “original” line-up with Robin, Speedy, (Kid) Flash, Aqualad and Hawk.

·         NTT (1884) #20-21

Jason appears in the Titans tower along the OG Titans, when Donna finally tells them what the mission is all about (stopping Cheshire from interrupting a meeting) she asks if they are in on the job, Jason is not only excited about being there but about Batman actually letting him come all the way to the tower. A little bit of what Jason thinks or saw in Bruce is shown when Wally says that he “didn’t think the Batman could be thrilled by anything. He is always so grim.”

Basically, what Jason says is that the Bat isn’t that bad if you get to know him and that he cares about Jason’s education outside of vigilantism. Also, Jason seems to be grateful and very receptive of the things that Bruce taught him, he regards him as a very good mentor.

After everyone decides to help, they get on their jet. Here we have a very important interaction between Jason and Donna, she is telling him how she is feeling about the attitude of the rest of the team and about how she is a little bit lost now that she is in charge of the Titans and then she asks what Robin thinks about the whole thing, Jason is obviously thrilled once more, someone as experienced as Donna is asking him for his opinion? It blows his mind away! Batman never does that, he is always following his lead and never has a say on what they do so, to him, helping the Titans is only getting better and maybe he will ask the Bat to let him join them permanently.

Because they were talking Donna wasn’t paying much attention while flying and after they barely avoid crashing the jet, she apologizes to everyone and once more looks for reassurance with Jason, this time Jason is caught off guard but after Hawk teases him about his hesitation he tells her that “everything’s okay”.

When they arrive to Switzerland (where the meeting will be held) we have Jason’s first interaction with Roy Harper and him also slowly transforming into a burrito, that boy was cold and pissed off about it!

It’s really funny to me that Roy talking about Oliver’s pervy arrows is his very first interaction with Jason, who would have thought that a mad man would later make them besties?

They all go inside a building to get warm and for a while Jason is just chilling while the other Titans are all having an existential crisis, because here is the thing, Jason is a kid, he was presumably 14 here while all the other are in their twenties. Donna is having trouble with her new position as leader of the Titans, Wally is trying to live up to Barry, Garth is grieving his love, Roy is still very uncomfortable about being on a mission that involves Cheshire and Hank is just crazy. The others are trying to complete a mission while their real-life problems loom over them and Jason is just on an adventure with cool people.

Its not much later than Cheshire attacks the Titans, she first takes on Wally because he is her biggest threat and then detonates a bomb, now here I will give a little bit of context, Cheshire does not want to kill the Titans as of now, she just wants to incapacitate them because them being there is making her own mission more complicated, all I will say is that she doesn’t truly have villainous intentions and that she has a very weak spot for Roy.

Anyway, the bomb incapacitates Garth and Roy and Cheshire also managed to shoot Wally so only Donna, Hank and Jason are left standing to capture Cheshire, but here is the thing, Hank doesn’t want to capture her, he wants to kill her.

Jason has interacted very few times with Hank so far and it has always been Hank teasing him but now as Jason is going to fight Cheshire Hank interrupts him telling him that he will do “what has to be done”. Cheshire of course wont fall easily and I think that at this very moment she is thinking that killing Hank wouldn’t be a bad idea because he is going to mess her plans up! But not to worry as she is raising her gun Jason comes in to save his ass!

Jason is not a match for Cheshire and after that she quickly subdues him. But what’s important here is two things, first Jason doesn’t want or consider the idea of killing Jade, he just wants to capture her and bring her to justice, secondly, he doesn’t even want her to kill Hank, who has been violent towards every Titan and rude to Jason every single time that he has interacted with him. What I am trying to say is that this IS Robin Jason, he doesn’t think or act the same as Red Hood will in the future, he has his opinions on what punishments killers should get but he is not there to kill anyone himself.

There is this whole page where Donna beats Hank against a tree so he stops killing, because that’s not what the Titans do, she explains that if they do that then the public (that is already quite afraid of them) will just fear them more and they don’t need that, plus she believes that he is acting that way out of grief after losing his brother, as she is saying all of this though she is putting quite a lot of pressure on his chest and that might have ended up in her actually killing Hank if Jason hasn’t been there to stop her.

Donna is obviously not having a good time and after this she says that she “has had it” and that from now on Robin should “take command” because “its his group anyway”. Oh man…its clear to the reader that Donna is not having a good time being team leader but she also misses a certain person a lot. She is obviously not seeing Jason there, she is seeing Dick, the person that she is used to take orders from but he is not there.

Jason is aware of this, he might be a kid and might not have as many problems as the other Titans as of now but he is not a fool and he doesn’t want people to see someone else when they look at him, so he confronts Donna about what she just said/did.

Jason is just great in this scene; he just doesn’t want people that he admires to treat him as if he were someone that he isn’t. Just because Dick isn’t there doesn’t mean that he (because he is Robin) can replace him, they are not the same person and they do not have the same experience. He calls out Donna on her behaviour towards him and Donna being an adult takes responsibly for her actions and understands that ultimately, she was hurting Jason’s feelings. We have a kinda wholesome moment when they hug but because this is written by Marv Wolfman and he just can’t help himself, he proceeds to write Jason as a horny teenager. What a way to ruin the moment Marv…

Back to Cheshire, she is about to kick Wally’s face in when she decides to first tell him what he has to tell the others when they wake up, which is “Cheshire remembers”.

Wally tells the Titans Cheshire’s message but none of them truly understands what it means, Hank says that he doesn’t even understand why they are alive. Donna comes to the conclusion that Cheshire might want something from them and this is where Jason gives his thoughts, he says “Doesn’t matter what she wants. We take care of her. She’s a killer.”, its clear once more than although Jason (as Robin) wouldn’t kill anyone he does feel a certain type of way about criminals and wants them to be locked up.

After yet another verbal fight between Hank and Donna the Titans take a cable car to their next location, Jason is shown as exited about the view and the whole experience once more. When they arrive, they find Faraday (the guy that called Donna for help in #19) and he explains a bit more the situation but Jason once more is having trouble staying warm so he goes to the cable car tunnel nearby, but he doesn’t go alone, Roy goes with him because his “costume wasn’t made for this kind of weather either”, in this second interaction between these two we get to see Jason’s detective skills shine.

Jason has been watching Roy and he found his reaction to Cheshire’s message quite sus. Not only is he showing his detective skills here but he also said in a previous panel this: “The Batman keeps telling me to watch people’s eyes. And every so often I notice you become awfully agitated…like something was going on you didn’t want to be part of”.  Zdarsky, hey pal, I am talking to you, look at this dude! He read Roy like an open book, this is Robin Jason, he likes being Robin and he is brilliant at it, he is methodical because he learnt from paying attention and working with Batman, so, you sir are wrong, not only did UtRH disprove your dumb narrative but so does this interaction (along all his appearances in this book).

Roy is impressed by the kid, and yeah, he calls him kid because he is a kid…Roy is visibly older than Jason as he should, do you see it Lobdell? Yeah, there is no dubious age gap between those two as you made it seem. Roy is impressed because between both of them he is the one that is most experienced, not the other way around. How did Lobdell manage to make up a whole as run where not only were Roy and Jason close in age and besties but also Jason was better at vigilantism than Roy and Roy was the one being impressed. It’s wild, wild and bad.

Back to the issue, Jason taken out of the fight quite fast once more by Cheshire and she proceeds to talk to Roy, that’s where we find out that they were lovers and that she feels weak when she is around him because he makes her feel feelings but that’s not all, she tells Roy that he is “the man that fathered my child” …Oh and now she does want to kill him. That’s where #20 ends, so let’s see what happens with Jason in #21.

In the beginning of #21 Jason is conscious once more and when he hears Cheshire’s threat, he attacks her so she can’t shoot Roy, he also says this “Sorry ‘cat’ that’s a definite no-no. Don’t you know mommy’s and daddies should never fight” I, I don’t know why he had to say it like that…the 80s were weird. While Jason is being himself Roy is thinking “Don’t be cocky kid, Jade hasn’t got a sense of humour…” but because he wants to talk to Jade, he tells Jason to go, that he will handle Cheshire and he leaves.

Roy and Jade talk, Donna and Hawk are fighting bad guys and each other and at some point, Jason joins Garth and helps him take down a couple of guys, he also tries to make conversation with him but Garth is still not talking to anybody.

Cheshire tells Roy that he will never hear about their child again and that he needs to let her do her thing and stay out of it because he doesn’t understand what’s going on, Roy doesn’t do what she asks and she “poisons” him. Donna saves a guy that Hank was trying to kill. After Cheshire leaves Roy comes to the conclusion that she wasn’t there to kill the people from the meeting or that she poisoned him, but because they were there and everything went to shit now the people that were getting together are blaming the Titans for the interruption. The whole thing is a mess and the news channel are not nice about the Titans as a whole, but I am not interested in exploring that here. All you need to know is that the people that made Cheshire do what she did to the Titans were the Brother Blood people.

It’s on the jet that we see Jason again, he and the others are going back to the tower. Because the news are painting the Titans as bad when they are arriving to the tower Jason sees a lot of people protesting about them and he feels bad. This was his first job with the Titans and he is a kid, imagine how sad it would make you if you wanted to help and after getting the job done people were mad at you. But even though he is sad about that he takes time to ask Roy if he is okay after he sees him almost running away from the tower, he doesn’t get a response but he isn’t mad about it.

Jason’s stay with the Titans comes to and end and he says that he loved hanging out with them and is grateful for having been invited, he is so sweet!

·         NTT (1884) #24

Here, for some reason, we see Jason saying goodbye to the Titans again and unlike at the end of #21 Roy is there to see him leave.

I am not going to lie though; I liked this goodbye better it feels like it’s more complete than the other one. Here he says that Batman wants him back in Gotham but that if the Titans ever need him again all they need to do is call. He also mentions Nightwing which is funny because he will be called by Donna again in #26 to help the Titans get Dick back from Brother Bloods Church.

I am going to cut this part here because issues 26 to 31 have a lot of Jason content that I want to explore and I can’t put any more pictures here, also this post is already long as it is now!

I just love Jason’s little moments in these issues, him confronting Donna and reading Roy like and open book in #20 are my absolute favourite, I just think this is a nice way to kinda show how wrong some current characterizations of Robin Jason are and what better way to do that than reading and looking into some good stories.

Oh! Before I forget, in #21 Roy leaves the Titans’ tower to go see Jade and he actually gets to meet his daughter Lian for the first time, so yeah, that was a wholesome moment!

[wickedpact]

dear tumblr user crim wickedpact pls write the essay/dissertation about nicky being shakespeare's fair youth (if you have time, ofc!!)

Not To Imply Nicky Was Shakespeare’s Fair Youth But Ive Read The Fair Youth Sonnets & Nicky Was Definitely Shakespeare’s Fair Youth, an essay by me, tumblr user crim wickedpact

background knowledge: our man shakespeare wrote some 120 sonnets about a young man referred to as the Fair Youth during the mid 1590s; there has been some debate among shakespeare enthusiasts whether shakespeare’s interest in the Fair Youth was platonic or romantic (but like. they were definitely romantic). no one knows for sure who the Fair Youth was, but it was definitely nicky and my first and most important piece of evidence regarding this hypothesis is the ‘lmao babe do you remember that guy who had a crush on me?’/ ‘i try not to remember the guy who had a crush on you’ look joe and nicky exchange when Merrick brings up shakespeare during the movie. especially since gina confirmed in a tweet that joe and nicky canonly did know shakespeare

my second piece of evidence is that it just Works (except for a couple small facts like.. the Fair Youth was prolly closer to his 20s than his 30s. and the fact that shakespeare implies that the Fair Youth slept with his mistress at one point. but he doesnt know what hes talking about shhh we IGNORE)

long post under cut

A. The Description Matches

when describing the Fair Youth (who I’ll call the FY from now on), shakespeare says he has a ‘gold complexion’ and ‘beautiful eyes’ and compares him to a ‘summer’s day’. He says the FY has “A woman’s gentle heart" and “An eye more bright than [women’s are], (...) Gilding the object whereupon [they] gazeth”

As much as shakespeare’s perceptions of sexuality and gender are very........  late 1500′s (whoo boy sonnet #20 is a wild ride) ...... the description does match, and also:

  B. The Fair Youth Refused to Get Married

it’s never really said why one way or another (shakespeare assumes it’s because the FY is selfish) but the FY didn’t/wouldn’t take on a wife and have a kid, and this was something that was a real sticker for our man Willy S. because, as he says in his sonnets a million times: beauty doesn’t last forever, but having a child not only passes down the FY’s beauty, but also blesses the woman the FY would have a child with (im not saying shakespeare wanted to bear the FY’s children, but he definitely did)

Whose fresh repair if now thou not renewest, Thou dost beguile the world, unbless some mother. For where is she so fair whose uneared womb Disdains the tillage of thy husbandry?

(ie. If you don’t renew yourself/ have children, you deprive the world and deprive a woman from having your child, since what woman out there is so beautiful that she wouldn’t want to bear your child?)

Like.

1.) if nicky is the FY then so many of these poems center around the idea of nicky growing old sometime soon and that must have been pretty funny to Nicky and

2.)  the fact that shakespeare would have been So Desperate for nicky to find a wife must have been the opposite of funny to joe. considering the ease of his and nicky’s relationship and the fact that being gay in late 1500s england was probably not a walk in the park, it is very likely shakespeare wouldn’t have known they were in a committed relationship-- or at least not known how close they actually were. Thus:

  C. The Rival (aka. Joe)

shakespeare mentions having a poetic rival in regards to the FY in several sonnets. In sonnet #21 he talks about how he’s not like Those Other Writers who use grand metaphors to talk about their muses

So is it not with me as with that Muse, Stirred by a painted beauty to his verse, Who heaven itself for ornament doth use And every fair with his fair doth rehearse, Making a couplement of proud compare With sun and moon, with earth and sea's rich gems, With April's first-born flowers, and all things rare,

(ie. I’m not like other poets who, when inspired by a ‘painted beauty’ use heaven and every other beautiful thing on the planet to make a grand comparison to their muse: he specifically lists the sun and moon as examples as well as other beautiful things)

He then goes on to say

And then believe me, my love is as fair As any mother's child, though not so bright As those gold candles fixed in heaven's air:

(ie. my love [the FY] is as beautiful as any other beautiful person, though I wouldn’t compare them to the stars/heavens (which is what he means by the 'gold candles’. those are stars.))

So shakespeare insults poets who compare their subjects to the sun, moon, and stars (amongst other things) and in the comics, Joe does literally exactly that

That man is the stars in my sky, and the sun that lights my days. That man is the moon when I'm lost in darkness, and warmth when I shiver in cold.

shakespeare also goes on to say in the same sonnet “Let them say more that like of hearsay well / I will not praise that purpose not to sell” which is to say ‘let people who like that kind of language use it, I wont because I don’t want anyone else to have the subject of my affections (the FY)’.

(which is a bit of a contradiction regarding his feelings abt the FY getting married, but these sonnets are full of contradictions. shakespeare was a confused dude; man spent the first 100 or so sonnets convinced the FY loved him back only for him to start wondering if the FY ever loved him near the end)

(not to mention Marriage For Love wasnt really.. much of a thing in Ye Olden Times but thats a different conversation. so shakespeare prolly didnt associate marriage with love/competition? anyways)

Shakesy-boo goes on to complain about this rival several times. In #79, he says

Yet what of thee thy poet doth invent He robs thee of, and pays it thee again. He lends thee virtue, and he stole that word From thy behaviour; beauty doth he give, And found it in thy cheek: he can afford No praise to thee, but what in thee doth live.

(ie. everything ‘your poet’ (as the FY apparently favored this unnamed rival) says about you, he takes it from you in the first place. he talks about your virtue, but learned the word from watching your behavior. he calls you beautiful but only discovered beauty by looking at your face. every compliment he gives you he took from you in the first place)

[and, as a smaller example, he also bemoans the fact that people want to paint the FY in #67, saying, “Why should false painting imitate his cheek, / And steal dead seeming of his living hue?”. and yknow. Joe’s an artist.]

And then another example in #86

Was it the proud full sail of [the rival’s] great verse, Bound for the prize of all too precious you, That did my ripe thoughts in my brain inhearse, Making their tomb the womb wherein they grew?

Was it his spirit, by spirits taught to write Above a mortal pitch, that struck me dead?

(ie. he’s talking about how he’s having difficulty writing abt the FY and is rhetorically asking if ‘the proud sail’ of the rival’s verses was the reason his ‘ripe thoughts’ were killed in their ‘womb’. He then asks (again rhetorically) if it was the rival’s ‘spirit’ (or creativity, maybe) ‘’’‘by spirits taught to write’’’’ that killed his own drive to write. none of the analyses I’ve read really explain what shakespeare means by ‘spirits taught to write’, other than maybe being a joke or reference to something we dont know, but... ‘taught by dead people to write in a way mortal people can’t’ very much sounds like a description of an immortal poet, eh?)

Which brings me to,

  D. Willy Boy Thinks There Are 500 Year Old Writings About the Fair Youth

shakespeare talks about people having written about the FY ‘500 years ago’ from the late 1500s in #59 which......................... would have been around 1100 AD. :thinking face:

Oh that record could with a backward look, Even of five hundred courses of the sun, Show me your image in some antique book, Since mind at first in character was done, That I might see what the old world could say To this composed wonder of your frame;

(ie. Oh if I could look back 500 years and see how you were described in some old books so I could see/reference what people used to write about you)

Which again brings me to,

  E. I’m Not Saying shakespeare Stole From Joe, But:

1.) In #22, shakespeare says this,

For all that beauty that doth cover thee, Is but the seemly raiment of my heart, Which in thy breast doth live, as thine in me: 

(ie, your beauty is due to the ‘clothes’ my heart gives you-- probably means something like ‘you’re beautiful because i love you’. goes on to say his heart lives in the FY’s chest, and the FY’s heart lives in shakespeare’s chest)

so: shakespeare tells the FY he has shakespeare’s heart. in comparison, Joe calls nicky ‘my heart’ in the comics...... :thinking face x2:

2.) In #109, shakespeare tells the FY ‘thou art my all’,

For nothing this wide universe I call, Save thou, my rose, in it thou art my all.

which rings similar to Joe’s ‘he’s all and he’s more’ as well as (from the comics) ‘he is my everything’

and just saying. joe looks pretty #done the mention of shakespeare.

  F. The last One

Despite shakespeare writing 30+ poems about the FY eventually growing old, the very last poem he writes about/for the FY says,

O thou, my lovely boy, who in thy power Dost hold Time's fickle glass, his sickle hour; Who hast by waning grown, and therein showest Thy lovers withering, as thy sweet self growest. 

(ie. you [the FY] have power over the ‘mirror’ (fickle glass) of time as well as time’s ‘harvesting’ ability (sickle hour) and as you grow older, you remain beautiful while your lovers [shakespeare] wither and grow old)

The transition from ‘get married and have a baby before you get old!!!!’ in #1-20 to talking about the FY’s presence in 500 y/o books in #59 to admitting the FY isn’t growing old in #126 kinda seems to imply shakespeare learning of/about nicky’s immortality at some point, and this last poem is him accepting it.

TLDR: not only does it make perfect sense if nicky was the Fair Youth from the FY sonnets, but it also makes perfect sense if joe was the Rival from the FY sonnets. its canon nothing will convince me otherwise

[tinyjeanmarco]

Your display name literally defines my week mood, Porco is the best boy🥺 i was wondering if you could write some hc about him?? I didn’t have any specific in mind, maybe something cute but ofc it’s up to you and you can even not write anything, that’s alright too!! Im just happy seeing more people warming up to him☺️ i hope you have a great February and that you stay safe and happy💖

eee! porco really is best boy, i love him to pieces. and of course i’ll write some hc’s about him (*°ヮ° *) these will be super soft, i promise. and thank you! my february has been going well so far, so i wish the same upon you! this is also my first request i’m doing, so i’m really excited. i hope you enjoy!  ♡

summary: some hc’s about domestic life with porco. canon divergence because in this he’s not a warrior, that way reader doesn’t have to worry about having a time limit w/ him or worry about anything happening to him (∩_∩). (i think this ended up like some sort of canon-ish au with some modern setting mixed in, whoops!)

porco x gn!reader

warnings: none

you’ve known porco since you two were kids. you essentially grew up together and you had always had a tiny crush on him growing up.

it wasn’t until you guys were teens that he confessed to liking you as well. this totally took you by surprise, but in a good way!

a few days after he confessed to you, he told you that he did so because he knew reiner also liked you, and he was afraid that reiner would admit his feelings for you and that you’d date him instead.

he didn’t want to become the pathetic childhood friend who was too afraid to say something and then be doomed to watch you be in love with someone else for the rest of his life.

when he told you this, you found it quite funny (and also felt bad for reiner since porco just outted him and now he would never get a chance cuz you’re dating porco), since you had always liked porco, not reiner, so he wouldn’t have had to worry, anyways.

you two had been together for years, not really having many issues. that isn’t to say you would never fight or disagree, but you two always made an effort to resolve any tensions that arose.

porco seems to me the type who holds grudges and doesn’t really care to talk things out, but he knows that if he does that with you, he will most likely end up losing you.

whenever you get into a disagreement/fight with him, he needs space and time alone before he can come back and confront the situation. if you try to make him talk right away, he will lose his cool and say something he doesn’t mean.

you sort of learned this the hard way with him when you started dating. he’s long since made up for those times, but in the back of his head, he still feels bad about them (although he would never tell you this).

after dating for like six years, porco finally decided to wife you up and make you his officially.

he would definitely want it to be really special for you because he absolutely adores you and wants to make it something that you’ll remember forever.

he would have a whole plan put together. he has the ring, he just needs to take you out, have a nice night, eating really well, and then as you two gaze up at the stars on the roof of the building you live in, he would whip out the ring and propose. bam! foolproof.

probably not as foolproof as he hoped because he actually ended up accidentally proposing to you while you guys were just cuddling one night.

you would be all cuddled up to him, both of you almost asleep, and he mumbles out, not thinking, “marry me.”

and you’re instantly awake at that, turning your head to glance at him, and just say yes.

boy do his eyes shoot wide open. he’s stumbling over words, trying to correct himself before you just kiss him to get him to shut the hell up.

he tells you that he had a whole plan to make it special for you and spend the whole day together before popping the question.

you respond, saying that he can still do that, you’ll just pretend you never heard anything, but any way that it happened was special enough to you because you love him with your whole heart and you just want to be with him.

he bonks you on your nose and just calls you cheesy, but his heart is beating fast with the pure love he holds for you.

you both end up going through with his plans and having a wonderful day, him proposing again at the end of it all.

okay, so, porco loves kissing you. his favorite activity. you want a smooch? you don’t even have to ask, he’s one step ahead of you.

he is a clingy baby that wants to always have you near him. he will constantly have his hand on you, whether it’s in your hand, on your thigh, around your waist.

he loves kissing the top of your head. if you are shorter than him, it’s a win and easy peasy. if you’re taller than him, he will make you bend down so he can still kiss the top of your head.

he also will love kisses on the top of his head if you’re taller than him, or if you two are cuddling and he has his head laid on your chest.

he also loves it when he’s just showered, and his hair isn’t slicked back, if you play with his hair, running your fingers through the soft blond locks. it really relaxes him and helps him fall asleep.

this clingy boy also loves to cuddle with you.

he will look for any opportunity to wiggle into your arms and tangle his limbs in yours.

he loves to be both the big spoon and little spoon, all depending on his mood. sometimes he just enjoys the comfort of being held close to you, and other times he wants to hold you in his arms to remind him that you’re really there with him.

he will have an iron grip on you, refusing to let you go ever.

“porco, please, i have to pee.”

“noooo. stay here, pee later.”

“porco, i will pee on you.”

i also totally hc porco to love cooking or baking. he definitely loves to eat and it’s more fun when he gets to eat it with you. better yet, cooking with you.

when you’re making cookies or something, you’ll have to yell at him to stop eating the raw batter. it’s not good for you. (if you’re vegan, you wont really have that exact issue, but him still eating it means there will be less output, so stop eating it, porco!)

he first started cooking when you guys moved in together which means he was pretty bad at it. you kind of had to help him and were brutally honest if he burnt something or did something wrong.

i don’t think he would really be a disaster in the kitchen because he would always follow the recipes down to a T.

i mentioned above you two moving in together. let me tell you, that was one chaotic day. so many boxes, so few hands. you legit spent all day moving things in.

porco would constantly be like “ow, ow, babe, i hurt myself!” to make you fret over him and then when you ask him what’s wrong he’ll say something along the lines of “i hurt my hand carrying this box. can you kiss it better?” or he would straight up be like “my heart hurts because you’re not kissing me right now.”

cue rolling your eyes and giving this dumb baby a kiss nearly every fifteen minutes.

you end move in day with all the boxes piled up around your apartment, and you two fall asleep on just a plain mattress with a few pillows, too tired to unpack anything else. maybe a blanket too so that way you guys don’t get too cold.

i’m hopping around a lot for these hc’s, but the wedding you two have is a nice small one with just your closest friends and family.

he doesn’t even care (that much) when you invite reiner, he’s just excited to marry you and be yours.

seeing you all dressed up for the wedding makes his heart leap into his throat, and he just starts crying. he never thought this day would come and that he would be lucky enough to spend his forever with you.

after you two say your vows and the officiator says you may kiss, he leaps to you and gives you the slowest, most gentle kiss ever. he pours his soul out into the kiss, making sure you know this is the happiest day of his life.

the whole part at the after party where you feed each other cake? he’s the one to smash it all over your face. yep. he’s that kind of husband.

calling him your husband is also your new favorite thing. it just makes it feel so real.  

“hey, can you get me a glass of water, husband?” and he melts because he loves hearing that come out of your mouth. it reminds him that you actually married him. (he still can’t believe that.)

porco will try his hardest to be the best husband ever and always make you happy. he just loves you to the moon and back and is never afraid to show it.

[palettes-and-prompts]

Fake Dating Prompts

Dialogue Prompts

1) "Just so you know, I don't like you." "Yeah, well, I'm not paying you to like me. I'm paying you to laugh at my jokes and cling to me like a magnet so my ex doesn't think I miss them." 2) "Can you at least pretend you think I'm funny?" "That costs extra." 3) "Oh shit, they're coming this way. Kiss me, kiss me right now!" "Yeah, okay." 4) "If you ever kiss me like that again-" "Shut up, you liked it, you opened your mouth for tongue." "I did not!" "Then why'd you lick mine when I stuck it in your mouth?" "Just don't kiss me, alright?" 5) "Careful, it's sounding like you're dangerously close to caring about them." 6) "You know, if I didn't know better I'd say you're in love." "I don't love anyone." "But they're not just anyone, are they?" 7) "This was all fake, this was just supposed to be fake you weren't supposed to tell me you love me!" "And you weren't supposed to say it back!" 8) "Did you mean what you said in there?" "No. Obviously. Did you mean what you said in there?" "No. Obviously. I was just talking you up in front of your ex, you know? Just showing them what they're missing." "Right." 9) "They're coming, kiss me." "Ew, no, you just had funyuns." "Do it!" "Fine!" 10) "We're going to have to kiss in front of them so maybe we should practice." "Yeah, just so we can find out what we need to do when they see us." "Exactly, just want to make it more passionate." 11) "That was a good practice kiss. Should we...practice sleeping together too?" "No!" "Right! Yeah, no, I was kidding." "..." "Totally kidding." 12) "God, one bed?" "The company does want us to pose as a couple." "Whatever, get us more pillows put a line of them down the center, I'm not sleeping in the floor and neither are you." "I'll call room service." 13) "They'll be in here in a second. Get naked." "What? You didn't say anything about getting naked!" "Just take off some of your clothes, I want them to think we're doing it!" 14) "I can't believe I have to pretend to like you. I hate you so much and when this is over I am going to ki-" "My ex is coming." "Kiss you because you're just so irresistible when you smile at me like that." "Aww, baby, you're so sweet." "Haha, careful, too much sweet'll kill you." 15) "You're not thinking about getting back together with them are you?" "No! No...of course not." "You are." 16) "I guess it's time for us to part ways." "We don't have to...do we? I mean we're already on this trip, might as well make the most of it." 17) "If they think you and I are together they'll both be furious." "You want us to pretend we're dating?" "Why not?" "Because you hate me." "I don't hate you." "You don't like me." "Okay, I don't like you. Doesn't mean I can't pretend to like you." 18) "Your ex is a piece of shit and I know I said I wasn't down to make them jealous but I change my mind." "What?" "I'm gonna kiss you and push you up against that wall in front of them. If you're not into that tell me now." "Well, what are you waiting for?" 19) "Come on, you're not really in love with Person A, are you? You're just using them to make me jealous." "I'd appreciate it if you took your hands of my girlfriend/boyfriend." "Cute, you've really got Person B playing the part, don't you?" "I'm not playing a part. And if you don't let them go my fist will let you know how much I'm not playing any part." "You're seriously with them?!" 20) "They can't give you what I can. I've got money and cars. I could take care of you. But them? They've got nothing, they're just a nobody, baby. You're a somebody. You deserve to be with another somebody like you. If you stick with them you'll just be a nobody." "I'd rather be nobody with them than a somebody with you."

Regular Prompts

1) A had a bad break up with B but when they remember that B's got a jealous streak they find C to help them out. C used to be friends with A, and B hated C when they were around A. When A suggests a price or something C insists they wanna do it for free to piss B off since B got them expelled from high school or something for something they did. When B sees C around A they're distracted and can't focus around their new partner. But when C's picking up A and kissing them against a wall B gets more than just distracted and A remembers a previous kiss they had as kids and think they might've been together if B hadn't got C expelled. 2) A's a thief who gets bailed out by a person B, the ex boyfriend/girlfriend of the person they tried to rob before they got arrested, Person B tells them they'll pay bail and more if they help them make their ex jealous so they'll take them back. A agrees and they go out a few times but their ex, Person C, doesn't seem to be interested in getting them back at all. Person B pays A anyway and tells them they're just going to go home. Person A tells them no and comes up with a plan. A then successfully robs them and plants the items on Person C's new arm candy. They continue to do that with each new person until C decides the only person they can trust is Person B. When B and C get back together B's happy but A realizes C doesn't treat B right. After watching them tear B down after a bad day A decides to steal one last thing from C, Person B. Person B is hesitant to leave because they've been wanting C back for so long, but when A promises a lot of things B doesn't want to leave. B doesn't leave until A admits their feelings in front of B and C. 3) A makes the mistake of falling for Person B, someone who only wants what they can't have. Even though B likes a lot they just wont as them out. A asks C to help make them more desirable to Person B. C thinks that's a stupid idea and requests money or a big favor for it. A agrees and they start going out, earning B's attention. A tells B that C's just perfect and that they're happy together. This does nothing but drive B crazy and make them want A more. Person B finally asks them out telling them to leave C. A agrees and C tells them they can't believe they wanted to be with a person like that since they deserve better. A thinks about C more and eventually B finds it hard to be tied down to anyone. A dumps them and tells them they will never have them again, which has B back to being into A. A finds C and C's drinking by themselves asking if they can date them a little longer. C tells them they're done faking it and A tells them they're tired of faking it, earning a smile from C. 4) A and B are sworn enemies but when the loves of their lives are dating each other they decide to date to make them jealous. C and D are having a nice dinner when A and B sit down a few tables away they immediately come over and tell them they know what they're trying to do and that they're not even into each other so they should stop trying. But A kisses B passionately and B kisses back until B's in A's lap and C and D are like 'We get it.' They still don't believe them but A and B try to have a nice dinner, complaining about the kiss quietly while they have smiles on their faces. When B finds out they're going back to D's place they tell A their apartment is right above theirs. When they leave A and B go back to B's place and hear them talking about them through the floor. B suggests they fake having sex and A tells them that's a good idea. They fake sex over the spot they're talking and make up dialogue. C and D still don't believe they're together and talk about going up the fire escape to see them just sitting around on the bed. A tells B they need to take their clothes off, which they do super fast as they mess up each other's hair. C and D catch them in a compromising position and they both fake embarrassment when they see C and D just standing at the window. This does make C and D jealous and A and B acknowledge they're a good team and they have a moment that they can't stop thinking about when they're back with their ex's. 5) When A's family can't stop talking about how B's doing way better than A and that B already has potential boyfriends/girlfriends, A impulsively tells their family that they've got a boyfriend/girlfriend already. They don't believe A at all and A promises that they'll bring them to [insert big event here]. A panics and calls C, the most respectable person they know and tells them the whole situation and asks them to pretend to be married to them and then after the event they can 'break up.' C agrees and since they already know everything about each other they don't even lie about how they know each other. A's family is impressed and B can't believe A could get someone so handsome/pretty who's also so classy. When A's family put A down in front of C, C informs them of A's accomplishments and how great they are. C excuses themselves and after a while the family is wondering where C went and suggest maybe they left because they realized A wasn't as good as they seemed and that they were just being polite. C comes back in, sweaty and out of breath and proposes to A on the spot, leaving B and the rest of the family speechless. A immediately says yes. 6) When A and B break up before they're supposed to go on a couples cruise A offers to give the tickets to C and whoever C's sleeping with at the time. C feels bad and tells them they wanna go with them and the two end up pretending to be together to mess with the other passengers, thinking it's hilarious. But somewhere along the road of fake dating they realize they like being this close to each other and they like spending time together. They end up sharing a kiss while in front of the other passengers to prove they're close but end up thinking the other person isn't feeling the way they do. They realize they're in love by the time they get home and when C's about to admit their feelings B shows up at the dock to apologize to A and beg for them back. 7) A and B are crime partners but when they decide to complete a bigger job with the help of their friends they're sent to play a married couple. Since they work well together it's easy and soon they even begin acting more like a couple when it's just them and their team. Eventually they're forced to share a guest room at one of their target's houses and it only has one bed. They find themselves moving closer until they're holding each other. This inevitably ends with them asking each other the question 'What are we?' 8) When A and B break up A is quick to get with someone else but B takes it pretty rough. When B sees A with C they manage to find D and ask them to pretend to be with them just for one date. D agrees, not really that interested until A and C show up and A laugh telling B that Person D is the worst person to be with because they're always sleeping around and don't know how to keep it in their pants. Person D is pissed off by this and decides that they're going to fake with with B even longer and convince A that they can make a relationship work. Anytime A is around when B and D are together D is extra affectionate and nice and even thought B knows it's all for show they can't help but fall for them. When B confesses their feelings D doesn't know how to react. 9) A is a professor with a student who's obsessed with them, Person B. When B gets increasingly more desperate for their attention A confesses they're seeing someone and convince their friend, and boss, person C to pretend to be with them. This upsets B but  they tell A they'll just have to wait until C slips up so they can have their chance at them. C is annoyed they have to keep up this charade and that B is watching them to make sure they don't 'cheat' on A since they're known to sleep around. A apologizes and they soon end up spending more and more time together until they start feeling things for each other. When B meets someone else, Person D their obsession with A disappears and they become head over heels for D. A and C realize they don't have to date anymore but find themselves unwilling to stop what they have so they decide to just go on a real date to see if they like it. (The obsession part is meant to be more head over heels, struck by cupid kind of 'in love.' Not like the scary/creepy/stalkery kind of 'love.' But it's up to you on how you wanna write it.) 10) A and B agree to pretend to be a couple to earn a lot of money by playing a 'How well do you know your partner' kind of game. The winner gets money or a big prize and so A and B spend the whole week asking each other newlywed partner games and everything and basic questions someone would be asked. Over the week they grow close and when they win they celebrate with a trip, now bonding over their earnings they go to a place the other would love and A realizes they like B a lot more than they thought. While they're talking B realizes they feel the same way but before they can kiss A's ex, Person C, pops up out of nowhere and brings up some old feelings. Bonus if Person C is B's best friend and so their feelings make things more complicated, especially if Person C is talking to A about getting back together.