#/angry goose meme

[pharawee]

Are we close enough now?

[hussyknee]

Tfw you find out that WHO estimated 14.8 million COVID or COVID related deaths...in January last year.

"Most of those are natural causes." The natural cause of what? What creates more natural causes to die from than other years? What is the natural cause motherfucker??

[thief-of-eggs]

“Silly goose” is such a funny phrase because like. Have you ever actually met a goose? Those bastards are anything but silly.

[kaiju-kisser]

My cats have provided everyone a free meme template if you are up for it

[jacobandjan]

(via "Cute angry duck" Active T-Shirt for Sale by JacobandJan)

[dischoarse]

Pretty sure he just waved the white flag. Definitely saw it coming when they start cussing.. "My sex organs no longer behave like a male's would" WHICH SEX ORGANS WOULD THOSE BE??? male sex organs because

You're male, through and through.

If "female" is a dogwhistle to you, you are a male supremacist.

If "vagina" or "vulva" or other female anatomical terms are dogwhistles to you, you are a male supremacist.

If "gay/lesbian not queer" is a dogwhistle to you, you are a homophobe.

If "same-sex attracted" or "same-sex marriage" are dogwhistles to you, you are a homophobe.

If "women's rights" or "female liberation" are dogwhistles to you, you are an MRA.

If "male violence" is a dogwhistle to you, you are an MRA.

If referring to biological sex is a dogwhistle to you, you are a science denialist.

If "two sexes" is a dogwhistle to you, you are a science denialist.

If "afab4afab" or "lesbians only" is a dogwhistle to you, you are an incel.

[ieatnomnom9823]

stupid headcanons no one asked for and make 0 sense

me and my friend enjoy in making the most shit headcanons to exist so i'm gonna share some of them bc why the fuck not?

princess kenny is an amazon box

kyle only knows how to play football because of how much he kicks Ike

cartman vibes to this video: https://youtu.be/PDJLvF1dUek?list=RDgBpdSlgR5qM (thats not mine btw)

butters has a MLP figure he literally sleeps with and treats it like his own child

everyone is sort of worried about butters obsession to that toy

the plural of kenny is in fact not kennies, but kennys

kyle not only kicks babies, but he also throws them

butters genuineley thinks the rickroll is a banger

kenny and cartman have the weirdest fucking pinterest feed *cough* maid catboys, shitty t-shirts, those random-ass pictures with text over them, like memes kinda but not with a very specific color text and font, the most random stickers and flags like bibble idk they really like bibble though also this totallyyyy isn't inspired by my feed *cough*

stan dedicates his LIFE to minecraft parkour. i'm talking watching those low guality parkour things with screenshits from the interent and he is a GOD at hypixel housing parkour (i came up with this because i have hypixel parkour open rn)

kenny is #1 lemon demon fan. i will NEVER change my mind about this.

craig literally sleeps with a fucking metal pipe.

instead of warming glasses of milk by pouring milk into a cup and microwaving the cup, he literally puts the whole fucking CARTON IN THE MICROWAVE AND THEN PUTS IT IN A CUP

instead of repenting your sins, cartman repeats his sins ( i just really needed to say that phrase today)

kyle is so weezer coded

stan's the type of mf to say "chat" instead of "guys"

anytime someone makes a dirty joke butters just akwardly smiles politely bc he doesn't get it but he's too embarrassed to ask what it meant

i found a picture this is exactly cartman and kenny's feed:

(that was my first screenshot since cleanig my files out other then the random bunny thing i drew in class cuz i was fucking boerd and had no idea what was going on)

stuart, randy, gerald, and steven (or whatever the fuck their name is) are literally besties but HERE ME OUT

randy and gerald are the silly besties like kyle and stan BUT stuart and steven (what the fuck is that man's name) are ALSO besties BECAUSE BECAUSE BECAUSE BECAUSE IN TFBW IN THE STRIP CLUB THEIR WATCHING LADIES DANCE TOGETHER AND THEIR GETTING DRUNK TOGETHER THEIR LITERALLY BEsTIES OMG

craig has flying powers

butters thinks skibidi toilet is peak comedy and that is why everyone hates him (except for literally like 2 people)

why the fuck is his name dougie

FUCKING HOW IS CARTMAN EVEN CAPABLE OF HAVING CLOSE FRIENDSHIPS AND BUTTERS DESERVES BETTER

"life goes onyonyonyonyonyonyonyon" is literally cartman's theme song after trying to kill everyone with some shitty plan he got from watching Megamind or something

kyle literally has trauma from burgers he will NOT eat any burger if you paid him fucking 56,000,000 bucks

kyle is so an elephant he's literally an elephant that's his spirit animal

tweek is literally a turtle idk how i can't describe the vibe but he is ik he's SO not a turtle but he just... idk he is

kenny is a fucking rat i literally have art of me bullying him and calling him a rat

butters is either a bunny or a cat of a duck he's just silly like that

cartman isn't a duck he's a goddamn angry goose

stan is a bear or like a giraffe or something idk ik he's the main character but i don't think about him that much for me

butters is literally in choir guys

HOLY SHIT STAN'S AN ORANGE CAT

craig is the most beaustiful majestic dragon to ever exist

craig's literally my favorite character if you couldn't tell

kenny is too scared to eat cheetos so he eats takis instead

literally everyone loves megamind

[fartshals]

Has anyone who isn't an insufferable retard used that meme with the angry looking goose? I've never seen an example that didn't suck ass

[mystiika]

jamie is, objectively, a bit of a strange guy. now, its not that his music taste itself is odd, but rather his choice of playlist names. he won't knock other people's preferences but he personally believes that life is too short for boring playlist names. the ones he comes up with are just so incredibly niche but make perfect sense to him. his playlists i've come up with so far ( except 2 & 3 which i saw & stole ) are as follows:

chugging 5hr energies in the campus library is his study/focus playlist

neon green troll living under the golden gate bridge is songs that have big trickster energy, do with this info what you will

is this a wedding or the apocalypse is pretty much entirely optimistic nihilism if that makes any sense. sorta just nothing matters so do what makes you happy

songs that taste good is songs that have really satisfying sounds or lyrics that are just objectively fun to say/sing

ruh roh raggy ( got any scooby snacks ) is his late night driving playlist

arthur's fist is based on the meme & is basically just a rage playlist of songs that are both angry & aggressive

lets commit a felony & tweet about it is for when he's either feeling like the main characte or needs a confidence boost

white noise 10hrs is still just music but its what jamie categorises as having a noisy sound. i'm not sure how else to describe it tbh

call me austin powers the way i be groovin' is songs that have a fun bass line or are a lil funky

my frisbee is got in a tree again is just sort of his generic feel good happy music, the type of thing you want to listen to if you go on a park picnic on a nice day

sometimes violence IS the answer ( untitled goose game ) is his work out or training session playlist all really high energy & intense, very hype

how to channel your inner pomona sprout is his stoner playlist because weed → herb → herbology → professor of herbology

brb gotta level up real quick is just video game songs or soundtracks he enjoys

please don't sue i have a family to feed is copyright-free music he can safely play while streaming

welcome to the chum bucket is just metal music

got that dr suess flow is just rap music

hot sauce classics is for all the old school iconic rap

tongue stained from all the pop rocks is his favourite b-side tracks

call my dentist is bubblegum pop

little berry richard & chuck ( in them we trust ) is exclusively rock & roll

rock paper scissors winner gets an autographed picture of jack black in a bowser onesie is inspired by this tik tok but basically the concept is songs that evoke the feeling of jack black while being from other artists. no particular genre or subgenre either, they are truly all over the place but all have the jack black vibe to them. one of the comments also referred to this as wizard music which, yeah 100%

& his sex playlist is titled yo yo yo & a bottle of cum but was previously called shake n bake

jamie also is v much the type to make people playlists or mixtapes that have equally strange names bc its his brand <3 hits such as: two needles in a haystack or made this you in a fever dream & the songs were actually good. or from when he was feeling Romantic: i'd join a pyramid scheme for you

that is all, ty 4 ur time

[earnmysong]

P F & T for the fic meme!

thanks so much for asking, lovely!

P: ARCHITECT - story built and planned out or GARDENER - story unfolds as you, and it, progress

i'm such a freaking gardener, MY GOD! there's never any planning ahead. i usually literally say to myself 'well, shit, [exhibits a-z] gave me feelings. what would it look like if...' then, i type a bunch of emotions into a doc and make my chaos mildly more coherent. you've saved my ass from myself a time two as well, for which i'm eternally grateful!

F: one of my favorite dialogue exchanges in my repertoire, with explanation

this rather lengthy snippet of 'experience has made me rich' holds a high spot in the rankings:

“Good God, Alexis! Were you mugged?” David’s concern manifests rather forcefully and in an extremely high octave. She startles, scrunching away from the noise and blocking her ear with an arm. The closest arm, sure, but definitely the wrong choice.

“Ouch, fuck!” she hisses, cradling her ice-chilled {also bandage-wrapped and currently about five times its regular size} wrist. Silver lining? She can finally feel her pulse! Except, it’s kind of, like, not where it should be, and it seems really angry and basically shocks her whenever she moves. She must not be exactly at her quietest, either, because Ted glances over, every feature of his face asking if she’s okay. She smiles, shoos him back to steadying their daughter on that murderous contraption. “Hey, David? I, um, kind of broke myself?”

“Mhmmm, yes. I did notice that. Sort of difficult to miss the striking resemblance between you and Anna Paquin after her car crash in that movie you always lose your shit over? Where she’s Mother Goose? And how exactly have we achieved this ultimate form of flattery and maimed ourselves so spectacularly this fine spring evening?”

“Okay, first of all? Shut up, David. Fly Away Home is fantastic and you totally got misty when Len held you hostage and finally forced you to watch over Chrismukkah. Don’t bother denying. Lying is beneath us now. Also?” She fluffs her hair, bracing herself to recount her harrowing ordeal. “Len’s got a shiny new itch to be a tinier, much more adorable Tony Hawk? Because of the Vans.” She growls the brand at him; he peers down apologetically – he’s probably wearing the traitors as they speak – and scoots himself slightly farther back. “She assigned me the role of guru, and I said: What the hell? It’ll be like surfing. But on solid ground.”

“I don’t think –” David grimaces at her misguided logic, nods in understanding. “That hasn’t ended well for you?”

Alexis treats him to a slow, shaky pan of her battered physique in case he requires assistance to arrive at the correct answer. “Clearly not, David,” she huffs. 

“Yes, well. To render the sting of your obviously declining athletic aptitude less sharp, I’ve just shipped you the largest, most expensive bottle of peach schnapps that a five-minute search can yield.” She flips him off. “I also took the liberty of having ‘Get Well Soon’ engraved on an ice bucket, to both commemorate the occasion and be available in the event of future mishaps. Whether these will relate to beverages or body parts of course remains to be seen.” 

“So much love!” Sarcasm edges her cheer, but her grin is genuine; she boops his nose through the screen. 

Then: “Mommy, I can almost land an ollie!” Len announces proudly, clambering up to sit next to Alexis as Ted mouths She can stay upright. “Are you alive? That was so much blood! And, see? I told you I memorized Daddy’s numb – Oh! Hi, Uncle David! Did Mommy tell you she taught me to skateboard?” 

David snorts in a ridiculously impolite manner, choking down the rest of his chuckle. “You could say that. The marvelous Ms. Mullens she most definitely is not, however. Oooh, have we added to our wardrobe without consultation?” 

Alexis listens to Lennox and David chat while Ted examines her mangled wrist. “Um, babe? Are you sure this – ” he’s pushing gently on various spots “- is the safest bet? Like, knowing something’s broken when I pass out in the park?”

“I’m not just going out on a limb, Lex. I have had practice.” Ted laughs, pressing his lips softly to hers, trading an unnerving touch for one flooded with comfort and calm; okay, yes, he might be, like, an expert at taking care of everything he encounters. 

“No. No.” David’s insistent scold cuts into their impromptu make-out sesh far sooner than she appreciates. “None of that, please. Your child is present and that fact alone should deter you. Because I am well-acquainted with your habits, however, I must also submit this for your consideration - my sister has wreaked enough havoc upon herself in a single afternoon to, quite possibly, last a lifetime.  Do we really want to put her further at risk, given some of the fun in which you’ve engaged in the past?” 

okay, so! my affinity for, and admiration of, dan levy et al. and 'schitt's creek' as a whole is storied and unrepeatable. typically, i would be terrified to attempt to capture the essence of a universe i value that highly. because i love SC as much as i do, still, i also wanted to see how close i could get. i'd already written two installments of the saga before this, but they'd only featured alexis and ted. here, david enters and the established tiny human speaks. i ended up coming pretty close to the mark, if i do say so myself, a fact that makes me smile, even a few years removed.

T: fandom tropes i can't stand

i don't necessarily understand when protagonists are paired romantically with villains who showed no glimmer of redemption in canon [carol danvers/yon-rogg, jyn/krennic, etc]. also? i'm not one for when violence extends beyond the action/fight sequence realm.

[stygicniron]

"I’m getting the distinct feeling that you didn’t expect to see me here."

Meme Tag -- @littlebadger

"I did not," Nico replied, voice tight as he tried to keep his grip on the cliffside. He might not be as afraid of heights as Thalia, but there was still a very practical side of him that recognized that he was very high up in the air and he had been climbing for a very long time. He didn't think his shadow travel would be able to help if he slip, and if he tried to shadow travel now, he would loose all the progress he made.

And if there was one thing about Nico, he was too stubborn to give up easily. Lip pouting forward slightly, he shimmied to the side, finding a better hold on the rock face so he could almost sit rather than climb, finally giving his arms a break. "Okay, your turn. What are you doing here?"

Speaking of Thalia though, Nico glanced back down the cliffside, trying to catch sight of the Hunter of Artemis in the forest below. He didn't think the daughter of Zeus had led him on a wild goose chase, but it also seemed weird that Artemis would care about something so obscure as the breeding patterns of griffins. Either way, he'd been tasked into helping check on the nest, but angry, territorial griffins meant he would take as long as he could.

[noswordinourlake]

5 Lines Tag

I was tagged by @failed221b-chill! Wow I can do the fanfic writing memes again huh? This is wild

rules: find five lines based on the prompts you are given, then change one of the prompts at the end!

I am. Interpreting 'lines' in the loosest possible sense here.

A Line About Butts

Across the room, Huan Hua, still in Shen Qingqiu’s assigned seat, has taken one bite of soup, turned virulently purple, and started choking.

“Oh dear,” Shen Qingqiu says, again on his way out of the door. “I wonder if Hallmaster Peng is allergic to mushrooms? How unfortunate.” Shang Qinghua is dumbfounded for half a second.

Shen-shixiong you asshole! You can't pin this on him!! That's the last time he'll try to do something nice for you!

shockingly for only having written SVSSS fic recently SQH calling Shen Jiu an asshole in my fic Plausible Deniability is the closest I get to butts so far! Am I letting the fandom down

all of the rest of these are from my WIP (my heart avoids itself) like a moon once married to the sea so I don't have to link it every time

A Sad Line

Of course this jinbu was familiar. He had saved up his night hunt earnings for a full half year to buy the jade, and knotted the tassel himself.

Shizun pales at Luo Binghe’s close inspection of the ornament, but pushes forward through the moment brazenly. “I doubt that my lord would—it was a personal gift from the artist. I suppose bamboo motifs are a common gift for Qing Jing cultivators. It may be that.”

Luo Binghe trails his fingers over the jade, feeling his own energy echo back to him, before he lets the pendant fall. “Yes,” he says, “I suppose that may be it.”

We're allergic to vulnerability and open communication here but I think this is uh. Pretty sad

A Furious Line

“I told you,” he says, voice as flat and cold and cutting as the memory of shizun falling, falling, “to leave him. Alone.”

She huffs, stomping a foot and jingling every bell on her many bangles in an angry chorus. “And this Hualing told the Junshang! It's too suspicious! I wasn't going to touch him, I just want to watch him for a bit!”

“And this lord told Sha Hualing that he is not an idiot. She will leave Huang Feng alone.”

“If you didn't want us following him around why did the Junshang put a spirit flag on him as flashy as a venomous peacock-tailed panther—”

Luo Binghe has many faults. He does admit this. He does not count to five before punching Sha Hualing so hard she almost makes it back to Two Hills.

A Line About Food

“This cultivator must admit to being deeply curious about what skills he might offer the Junshang that his other advisors do not have in plenty?” Shen Qingqiu asks. Luo Binghe’s dreamscape has transformed into a well-lit and welcoming receiving room, and a tea service sits on the table between them. Shen Qingqiu wonders if Binghe will expect him to drink the dream tea and then, immediately on the heels of this first thought, if blood gu can be transmitted in the dream realm. He…probably won't have to drink the dream tea, right? A receiving room needs tea, it's there for verisimilitude, surely?

A Line About Animals

The last three places he'd stopped for more than a night, Sha Hualing had showed up within the day. So far in his list of ignominious escapes, he has jumped out of a third storey window, stolen clothing off of an unattended wash line, and generated probably indelible mental trauma in himself creating a distraction by irritating and then setting loose a pen of geese (not even any kind of demonic fowl! Just regular geese!). Shen Qingqiu had thought, after the goose fiasco, his escape attempts could get no worse but this. Feels worse, definitely. Smells maybe about the same?

This was fun! I thought I was going to have nothing for the food prompt but then I ended up being surprisingly spoiled for choice. Also all these low EQ POV characters... Why are you making the emotional prompts so difficult...

Tagging (of course only if you want to) @tavina-writes, @cerusee, @livingmeatloaf, @yletylyf and an open tag for anyone else who wants to join in!

Prompts:

A Line You Think is Hilarious

A Sad Line

A Furious Line

A Line About Food

A Line About Animals

[perryshmirtz-described]

[Image description: two images.

First is a digital illustration of Ducky Momo with an angry expression and holding a butter knife in its mouth. Text on the left says, “peace was never an option.” It’s in front of a white background.

The second image is the original meme the drawing was based on. It shows a goose instead of Ducky Momo. End ID]

Important art

[animalcrossingmemes]

[dronttiedvard]

There is NOTHING more terrifying than hearing a bunch of bypassing geese making goose sounds at midnight

[silverhand]

And my absolute fav is hearing all of the Sensible Centrists scolding me because I'm whining about the things I need being pricey when the economy is booming.

<Angry goose meme: Booming for who, motherfucker?>