#//So they can go all out and fiend together lol

[dxfiedfxte-a]

Fall/Autumn starters. || Still Accepting

@bluescarfvivi​ sent:  🔥 - Our muses hang out by the bonfire

It was the first day of October on a perfect fall day, and with cold weather, came the perfect time for a backyard bonfire, and who better to enjoy it with, than his girlfriend, fellow paranormal investigator Vivi Kimoto who was the leader of her own group Mystery Skull Investigation Team, or MSI for short. This was their second October together, which meant that it would also the second Halloween since they’d been together. Despite their respective companies keeping them busy, the couple had managed to work through their busy schedules, and October was always a busy month in the realm of the Paranormal, so he wanted to enjoy as much time as he could with her before the month’s work would begin to pick up for the both of them.

Earlier, Minato had texted her inviting her over to join him for the bonfire, whenever she’d respond, he let her to know that he’ll send a follow up text when he’s ready for her to head over. With the texts sent, the fool got in his car and went shopping to stock up on items for the planned bonfire. In total, he spent about three hours shopping for items as well as getting some general groceries on the side, he was already out, so he figured he may as well kill two birds with one stone and take care of all of his shopping at the same time, it would save him the trouble of doing shopping later in the week, giving him more time to relax and prepare for another busy October.

When evening came around, Minato got home just as the sun began to set good timing. Taking a few minutes to put away all his other groceries away that weren’t related to tonight’s event. Now that the groceries were put away, Minato started to set up the bonfire. Unlocking his storage basement, Minato went downstairs to carefully pick up his firepit, lugging it upstairs and bringing it outside. Setting it down in the yard just past the walkway on some gravel, he opens the cage and returns downstairs to grab a bag of fire wood bringing it up and outside to his yard to begin loading up the pit with a couple pieces of fire wood to start it off, before putting in some newspaper and igniting it with a barbeque lighter. 

Grey eyes watch the flame begin to travel up the piece of paper and all the way towards the wood sparking the logs as the bonfire officially began, the crackle of wood beginning to burn, and the smell of burning logs began to permeate the yard, all that was left now, was to set up chairs, taking a couple minutes to do that, he brings out the bag of marshmallows along with the pokers to hold them. Just as he came out with the marshmallows, Minato was greeted by the sound of his backyard gate opening, she was here.

Turning his head to face her, he rises up from his seat and walks over greet her. [{ 🦋 }] - “Hey Viv-Viv! Glad you could make it.”

Minato goes in for a hug, planting a kiss on her lips welcoming her to the bonfire, their first one of the season. Taking her hand gently in his own, he leads her to the bonfire so they could sit down close beside each other.

[{ 🦋 }] - “I invited some of the others, they said they’d be here a little later, so it’s just you and me for now. So, how about we start roasting some stuff? I got marshmallows and mini-sausages to start us off, a bunch of s’mores kits too. There’s plenty, so feel free to help yourself babe~”

[apclyptc]

NSFW ALPHABET— CHRIS STURNIOLO

warnings— obviously suggestive content, if u don’t like don’t read kinda thing. nsfw will be under the cut!

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

chris does his best with aftercare i feel like. he’ll always bring you a towel, ask if you want anything like a drink or even just a cuddle.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

he loves everything about you, he doesn’t seem like the type to be judgemental about anyone’s body. but he specifically loves your hips, and always wants to have his hands on them whether that’s in bed or just in public. as for himself, he likes his back. especially when your scratch marks are all over it.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

loves cumming on your face. i said what i said. there’s something so hot about seeing your cute innocent face ruined with his cum. also in your mouth. chris loves seeing you swallow every last drop.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

has a pair of your panties in his room. whenever he can’t be around you, he will use the underwear to get off. he’s not even ashamed about it.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

definitely not a virgin. he’s not like some crazy sex fiend but he has enough experience to know what to do. he also has a need to be good at everything so he makes sure he knows exactly what you like.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

doggy. he is a doggy man. buuuuut when he’s feeling extra clingy he wants you to ride him so he can see your pretty face.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

definitely likes to have fun with it, chris doesn’t take anything too seriously so it makes sense that he is the same in bed. it’s only when he’s close to finishing that he gets really into it.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

he doesn’t like to be completely bare down there. it feels weird. but he would also die of embarrassment if he wasn’t well groomed so he keeps the hair short and tamed to prevent any awkwardness when y’all are going at it.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

he can deny it all he wants but he would be sooooo lovey. of course, if he’s been stressed lately or you tease him too much, he gets kind of wild.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

would honestly prefer you do it for him. but if you aren’t with him, he just goes to his photo collection of you or the video you made together and uses that instead.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

chris is a simple guy. he’s not overly kinky but he does enjoy to give you light slaps from time to time. and he’s a sucker for fucking you to the point you can’t even speak. and then there was that one time with the handcuffs…..

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

he doesn’t really venture out anywhere other than his and your bed. or sometimes the couch in the warehouse. and over the desk in the conference room. and sometimes public bathrooms. and also the kitchen. actually he’s pretty much down to go at it anywhere as long as there’s no one around.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

if you wear his clothes, he can not do anything all day until you have sex. if you play with his hair he will be in the mood instantly. he’s always ready whenever the fuck you want him. (lol.)

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

would never consider a threesome. he’s too possessive for that. he’s also not a fan of choking. he just doesn’t want to risk hurting you in a bad way.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

no one can convince me that this man isn’t a munch. he just loves eating you out. and he’s good at it too. he would happily do it for hours. as for receiving, he loves that too. especially if he’s had a rough day, the best way for him to relax is if he’s fucking your face.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

chris likes to start off slow and gradually go faster. but it’s a different story if you’ve teased him, he will refuse to go faster just to annoy you. if you’re in missionary he enjoys going slow too, it feels more intimate that way.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

quickies whenever, wherever. he does not care. he still prefers to take his time in bed with you, but he is never opposed to a quick fuck.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

there was one time when you almost got caught by his parents. and that one time where you actually got caught by nick. after that, you both agreed not to be too risky when others were around.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

chris is too obsessed with you to last for a lot of rounds. it’s usually one or two, but he always makes sure he lasts longer than you.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he never uses any on himself. not when he has you. he does have a couple for you, but why use them when he doesn’t need them? he can do it all by himself.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

chris was born to tease. in any setting, he loves to make you needy . he finds it especially fun to tease you when there are others around. it’s unnoticeable things, like placing a hand on your upper thigh, sneaking a hand underneath your top, whispering things in your ear about all the things he wants to do to you when you’re alone. it drives you crazy.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

even if he tried, chris can’t help but be vocal. whether it be grunts or soft groans, he always vocalises how good you make him feel. when he’s close, you have him fully moaning and sometimes the occasional whine slips out if he’s really into it.

he does it on purpose sometimes because he knows you like it.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

chris often rips apart your panties when you fuck just so he can take you to buy more and get you to try them on in the fitting rooms. he always ends up following you in just so he can fuck you in front of the mirror.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

what chris doesn’t have in girth, he makes up for in length. his dick is the perfect amount of thickness that you like, with an impressive size that he knows how to use. the veins on either side make his dick truly delicious.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

this guy doesn’t have an off switch. he’s so attracted to you, even just seeing a photo you send him makes his pants tighten and he can’t help but need you.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

he usually just waits until you fall asleep to get comfortable. most of the time neither of you fall asleep so he gets to talk to you and cuddle while you relax.

a/n: matt next? hope u enjoyed my take!

© APCYLPTC 2023. do not repost, translate, or duplicate any of my works here or any other websites.

[mactavishsgfandwife]

saw that ur reqs r open, and i love all ur work sooo here i am lol

what would the tf141 boys be like w a reader who’s into horror? (i was thinking reader is like rlly sweet but loves playing horror video games or smth, but u can interpret it however u want!)

i can js imagine johnny freaking out when he sees reader playing like,,silent hill or smth. or resident evil 7 (can u tell im a horror game nerd lol)

but yeah! js a silly little idea i had, feel free not to write it if u don’t want to! have a good day, ily!

TF141 Watching a Horror Movie With You 🎃

hi omg this is such a cute concept!! thank you so much for the support, you have no idea how much i appreciate it! i have so many ideas for them with someone who loves horror movies so that’s what this post is about (i hope that’s ok :( ) but i’ll try to write about horror games another time because that’s such a cute concept! i just have lots of ideas for this one rn so i thought i’d do it first female reader, fluff, not proofread <3

Simon "Ghost" Riley thinks it’s cute that you love horror movies. He spends half his life in a real-life horror, he’s seen things that you could never imagine. Teasingly calls you a ‘psycho’ for just sitting there happily, cuddled up to him as you watch something absolutely terrifying go down on the screen.

Simon is a pain in the ass to watch certain horror movies with, because if guns or fighting are involved then he will make sure to point out to you exactly what the directors got wrong.

"He’s holding it wrong… if I even… Price’d never let me hear t’end of it," he mumbles, not talking to anyone in particular.

When you cuddle on the sofa, if you’re laying face down on his chest, he loves to keep one hand on your ass. Sometimes, if something does make him jump, he’ll squeeze it out of instinct.

People don’t usually expect it but you’re very good with scary stuff, you rarely ever get spooked out. But sometimes you do, especially if you’re tired and it’s late.

Once, after you’d watched a film, you went to get ready for bed and Simon went ‘to eat something’. Even when you were all changed and ready for bed, he still hadn’t returned, and so - twiddling your fingers together for reassurance - you peeked out into the darkened hallway.

Only for a 6'4" soldier in a skull mask, wielding a cup of tea, to jump out at you from behind.

You screamed, stumbling back in a state of panicked confusion, about to cry out for Simon when you came to your senses and realised that the masked intruder was Simon.

He stood there, laughing his ass off, until he realised that you were obviously very on edge and a little bit teary eyed.

"C’mere…" he sighed, placing down his tea to take you into his arms, "i’m sorry, baby girl, please don’t cry…" Your heart was racing and you were debating whether or not to slap him, but you knew he didn’t mean to upset you. And you were happy so long as he made up for it.

Soap Mactavish claims that he’s not scared of anything. Nooo, no way, he’s not scared. He’s so not scared that he’s looking away and squeezing your hand.

Poor guy is so easily jumpscared, it makes you giggle.

"You sure this i’nt going t’be too scary for you, bonnie?" he coos, placing an arm around your shoulder as he half-watches the film that has plunged into a strange silence. He’s definitely trying (and failing) to be subtle as he flexed his muscular arms a little bit, in an attempt to show off.

"Oh yeah, don’t worry," you nod sweetly, smiling up at him.

"I’m just saying, angel, if you need to bury your head into my chest, or if you can’t look, then that’s okay, you just go ahead and make yourself comfortable. I’m a soldier, I could easily take on any- Shit! Fucking hell!" he jumps, squealing and then clearing his throat in a poor attempt to disguise it.

"You sure this isn’t going to be too scary for you, bonnie baby..?" you tease, kissing his cheek.

"Lay off it," he pouts, blushing a little bit as he nuzzles his face into your hair.

Alsoooo Johnny is a fiend for feeling you up when you’re watching a film together. He sees it as a perfect opportunity to get to know his pretty lass a little bit better.

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick’s favourite part of movie night is the food. He loves takeaway (he’s definitely a Nando’s lover) but his absolute favourite food is your home cooking. When he was asked his favourite food when he was younger, he was always the one kid who would say "whatever my mum makes!" and now he’s an adult it’s just the same, but "whatever my girlfriend makes!" Whenever he realises you’re going to watch a film, whether you invited him or not, he will call out to you from the other room to "HOLD ON!" as he grabs snacks and drinks for the two of you.

Gaz isn’t too easily creeped out, but it happens. He’ll never admit that it’s because he was scared, but you’ve definitely noticed him ‘accidentally’ leaving the hallway light on. If it wasn’t an ‘accident’, then he obviously did it so that you wouldn’t feel scared in the night. He probably realises that you can see right through him, but you always say you believe him, just to make him feel better.

Kyle’s favourite horror movie series is Paranormal Activity, because it’s a so-bad-it’s-good kind of thing. He loves sitting in bed, eating popcorn, with you in his lap, laughing til you cry at all his jokes about how horrendously made the films are. Once, he was taking the piss out of how bad the film you were watching was and then immediately got jumpscared. He even let out a weird noise in shock - he didn’t hear the end of it for weeks.

Even if he’s not cuddling you as close as possible, Gaz loves to rouch you, usually by holding you with one arm as you rest your head on his shoulder. He is a serial thigh-squeezer.

John Price is a total dad, and that extends to when you can convince him to watch one of your favourite films with you. He wants to watch the movie, it’s not his fault if he falls asleep 15 minutes in every single time.

He lets you lay on his broad chest, that’s warm and rises and fall under your head, while he rests his hands behind his head and closes his eyes. He’s prone to snoring, too - in past, you’ve had to rewind the film because you missed part of it while you were trying to get him to wake up and shut up. The only sureproof way to wake him up is to try and move off of him - he’ll open one eye and grumble at you, as he pulls you right back into him.

"You’re not even watching the film, you’re asleep…" you whine, looking up at him.

"’M watching, love. Shhh," he mumbles, eyes still closed as he softly pats your hair.

"Are not," you pout.

"Shhh. ‘M trying to watch this," he hushes you, eyes closed and totally ready to go back to sleep. You’re almost annoyed at him but he makes that very hard, breathing softly through that moustache as he presses you against him, like you’re a teddy or a weighted blanket.

In terms of the films himself, Price isn’t easily scared (partly helped by the fact that he spends half of the time asleep). The first time that you two watched something scary together, he was almost expecting you to be terrified, but he was pleasantly surprised when you weren’t. He thinks it’s funny how you can sit in his lap perfectly happy and watch something that would have any ‘sensible’ (as he puts it) girl screaming.

He either gets very irritated by the main characters making terrible decisions and getting themselves into trouble, or finds it hilarious. He also loves to rub your feet while you watch the movie, literal princess treatment.

i kind of want to watch a horror movie nowwww

all pictures are from the game or from pinterest as far as i’m aware

i hope this was ok for you!!! i know it’s not exactly what you wanted but maybe we can just consider it part 1 of the horror obsessed reader saga >:)

masterlist

[silverzoomies]

silverzoomiezzz hi hi i was eating my cloudberry ice cream and i dont know why i start to think about peter and then i think about you. and i have a question for you. what do you think peter’s fav snacks that he would save it for you because he wanted you to enjoy and love it as much as he does? this is so silly lol but anyway have a great summer <3

💗oh my gosh, hello anon sweetie !! i'm sorry for answering so late !! i hope your summer has been nice !! it's been pretty decent here, aside from the lame ass humidity.🔥🫠🔥

i'm so honored you would think of me, after thinking of our beloved speedy boy. 💗honestly, i take that as such a huge compliment !!

⚡snacks i think peter maximoff would like (he hoards them, cuz he's the snack hoarding type. ty dofp 💗):

⚡in canon, he hoards hostess snack cakes. specifically the chocolatey, cream-filled kind ⚡and twinkies. dude's got twinkies for two movies in a row ⚡like it's no wonder people assume he's a twinkie fiend ⚡we also see him with so much pepsi and mtn dew ⚡and i know it's just product placement obvi. but he does seem like a mtn dew guy, right? i bet he'd love baja blast. code red too ⚡dk if this counts as a snack, but he'd probably love taco bell. i mean, it's fast. it's cheap. it's addictive. it's easy to indulge in. mans would quote those old taco bell commercials with the chihuahua ⚡sour candy. all of it. gummy worms, airhead x-tremes, sour twists, sour patch kids. tell me i'm wrong. i'm not ⚡he'd make a mess with some fun dip, lemme tell ya ⚡any candy they used to give out on halloween? he'd be addicted to all that shit. he'd love sugary junk. he constantly needs his fix. laffy taffy, nerds, now and laters, skittles, pop rocks, m&m's - you name it, he's into it ⚡imagine the dorito fingers, anon. the cheeto fingers. the takis fingers. do y'all think he'd be more into regular cheetos, or hot cheetos? he reads as a hot cheetos guy to me ⚡he'd slam some icees. slurpees. any kinda syrupy, frozen drink. he mixes all the flavors, sucks it down, and feels no brain freeze ⚡if you took him to carnivals, boardwalks, or amusement parks; he'd put the funnel cake stands out of business ⚡sweets are his kryptonite, really ⚡i personally like to imagine he knows his fair share of international snacks too. since he can zip around the world in a blink. taiyaki. baklava. conchas. tres leches. pirozhki. european chocolate. any and all kinds of street food. he knows all the best 7-eleven instant ramen - and the best toppings for 'em too ⚡i think he'd also go hog wild over a really good steak, y'know? or some barbecue. some ribs. some brisket. all the shmeats !!

⚡snacks i think peter maximoff would save, just so he could share them with you💗:

⚡he wouldn't ⚡correction: he couldn't ⚡c'mon, do you honestly think he'd have the self control? ⚡you're asking him to do the impossible ⚡see, anon, he'd think about saving a yummy treat for you ⚡keyword being think ⚡like, just as he starts to realize he's crushing on you big time ⚡he's guzzling something tasty, when he has the thought: hey...wait a sec! you'd probably really like this!! ⚡but a second later, the treat's already gone. devoured in an instant. whoops! oh well!! ⚡he's just way too impulsive to save anything ⚡like it would have to be out of sight, out of mind ⚡or you'd have to pick from his own, secret stash ⚡because otherwise, he can't hold himself back. he'll gorge any snacks in the nearest vicinity ⚡he'd legit have to wait 'til you were both together. in that moment. if you had a few minutes. he'd be like, "hey. babe. babe. babe. babe. i got somethin' i wanna show you." ⚡he speeds you away for some mind-blowingly good street food, in some country you've never been to, nor heard of ⚡even on valentine's day. he has to snag you one of those heart-shaped boxes of chocolates last minute ⚡that, or he has to hide it from himself. if he doesn't, he'll be lookin' down at an empty box - chocolate all over the corners of his mouth - like "ah, shit."

[itsmarsss]

Scandalous [Blitzø x Fem!Succubus!Reader x Stolas] (Helluva Boss) pt. 9 - If I Had a Nickel

pt 1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3 | pt. 4 | pt. 5 | 1st bonus | pt. 6 | pt. 7 | pt. 8

Getting into a weird three-way situation with an imp and a succubus isn’t exactly considered classy, Stolas.

If Blitzø had a nickel for every ex of one his friends’ he’d fucked he’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice, right?

Word count: 6,117

Warnings: since it’s something concubi need to survive, having sex with humans for that need is not considered cheating between them in of itself. doesn’t mean it doesn’t feel shitty. you’ll get this when you get to it. this takes place during spring broken but I’ve already said do not take the shows timeline as entirely the same as my own lol. Spring broken will have happened after Exes and Ohhs but Exes and Ohhs will have happened before Ozzie’s in this fic. Kind of sexual/physical assault of Moxxie (same that happens in the episode, nothing graphic or anything), pretty tense chapter, Verosika is very much a bitch here but don’t worry abt it.

If you were to say so yourself, things have been pretty okay the past few weeks, which is a great freaking accomplishment, especially with Spring Break coming up.

Apart from being emotionally hard, considering the... well, the memories tied to it, Spring Break just makes you anxious, more than ever now that you actually had access to the human world during it with Stolas’ Grimoire.

… Which is the exact concern Ozzie expressed during the last sleepover you had at his place the previous week.

But you got this under control.

Of course, you'd still be careful, planning on staying in the office more often until you could find yourself less nervous about going up, and you made sure to tell him that.

Besides, there's plenty things more fun and more important for you to think of. You've been hanging out with Blitzø a lot these days, and you were actually having fun with the ‘trade’ with Stolas that you were now an official part of. You and Milllie managed to keep the weekly sleepover nights pretty consistent, Loona hasn't been in such a terrible mood lately and, therefore, Moxxie has been significantly calmer, too. You'd even managed to be sooo brave and keep yourself calm enough to make small talk with Fizz when Ozzie left the two of you alone for a few minutes in one your nights over at their place. Hey, maybe next week you can ask him a question, even!

Not much, admittedly, but progress nonetheless. Befriending your best friend's boyfriend is a little nerve-wrecking, especially when he’s so wary of the fact that you’re the only demon in hell with the power to confirm the rumors about them are real and have shit hit the fan for them.

You even- wait.

You recognize the song the very second it starts playing, taking you out of your thoughts and glancing at Blitzø as he turns the volume all the way up.

“You were the spicy little demon with the bleach blonde hair-“ you sing along with the car radio, holding an imaginary microphone to yourself before holding it to Blitzø.

“F-fiending for some- uhh- yeah, when I caught your stare!” Blitzø tries to sing along into it as he drives and you laugh at his attempt to sing the lyrics, already knowing he'd get most of them somewhat wrong, before leaning towards him so you can both sing into the imaginary mic together.

“Thought it might be love- but what?”

“But you went too far! Fucked all my friends and-“ Blitzø’s eyes widen so much they might as well fall off their sockets. “Holy shit-“ He steers the wheel so violently everyone thrashes around in the car, everyone in the backseat falling over each other and pushes the brakes forcefully, making the car come to a stop abruptly and he immediately proceeds to shove his head through the open window to yell at whoever it was that, as you could see now, had parked in his designated parking space. “Oh, you suck for life, do ya?”

He even goes through the trouble of fumbling to grab a megaphone he apparently kept in the glove compartment for... situations like this? Well, something like that. He continues yelling out insults until the sight of who comes out of the car makes him stop speaking completely.

It’s a hard task making Blitzø shut his mouth, you gotta give her that.

“Oh, shit. Verosika.” You state out loud, but it's more to yourself than anything. What's weird is that Blitzø says the exact same thing, the exact same time.

"Oh, shit. Verosika?” He asks, and you figure it's more to himself than anything as well. He turns to face you for a moment, blinking a few times before speaking. “You know her?”

“Uhhh…. “ So much for things being good lately. You want to stall as much as you can, you want to vanish from where you were, you want the floor to swallow you whole never to be seen again. The most you can do about all of that is trying to sink down on your seat so she doesn't see you, but it’s no use, really. She pops her bubblegum and grins at you. She already has.

“Blitzo.”

“I should have known you’d be here. I could smell fish from miles, which is odd, because I believe the nearest ocean is-” he pushes himself so far out the window he ends up falling face-first to the floor, but gets up as quick as he can just so he can finish his insult. “Three rings down!”

“And I should’ve known you’d be here when I heard the amber alerts.”

“Oh, yeah? I’m surprised they let your fat ass out of rehab.” She was in rehab? Again? “I can see you're still a drunken whore, clutching onto that beelzejuice bottle like its the last cock in hell!”

“They let me out because I’m still famous. And rehab is for sad, loser washups. So… your sister says hi. You wanna come out now, y/n? I'm sure you're familiar with the subject."

You sigh, deciding it’s better to confront her right now than to let her say too much, and so you get out of the car, walking towards where her and Blitzø stood. “Hi.”

“Hi? That’s all you have to say?”

“What do you want me to say?”

“For starters, what the fuck is going on, maybe?”

“What do you mean?”

“Getting with my fucking ex? Now that’s low even for you.”

“Your ex? Who's your ex?”

“Oh so you didn't know I dated him, that’s totally not why you’re here with him right now. Right.”

“You dated her?”

“Yeah, we dated for a while,” Blitzø shrugs. Oh, no.

“Yeah, until he ran off leaving me to pay for the hotel room, stole my car and-” Blitzø joins in, finishing word for word what she had to say, like he'd heard the speech a million times before. You don't doubt he has. “-run three rings to wrath and max my credit cards on shitty horse-riding lessons!”

“Goddamit, whore, you will not let that go!”

“You… did that?”

“What, you gonna crucify me for it? How the fuck do you even know each other? Were you friends or something?"

“I- uh-”

“We dated too. Unfortunately.” Verosika spits out.

Blitzø turns to face you. “Wait what? You dated my ex?”

“Well I definitely dated her first. That tattoo was not there,” you point at the tattooed heart with Blitzø’s name crossed out inside of it, and Verosika instantly covers it with her coat.

“That’s true. Until… well, I’ll let the slut tell you what she did,” she tells Blitzø before smiling at you. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I'm doing a bit of freelance for one of the infinitely more successful companies in the building, and they wanted to have me come in this week to lead their team during Spring Break. Hey, maybe you wanna come too? Oh, wait, I forgot you’re on the big guy’s watchlist. Maybe he can give you a pemission slip?"

You avoid her gaze, feeling smaller than ever at the dig. She laughs at your reaction.

Blitzø interferes. “Well I don't know what that fucking means. But you said a week? No, no, you are not parking here for a fucking week.”

“Aw, you mad, Blitzø? Choke on a sandpaper cock.” She walks away flipping him off, and he chases after her.

You stay right where you are.

Blitzø follows suit behind her and threatens to call HR lest she parks somewhere else, which understandably sends all three of them into a laughing fit at the ridiculousness of the thought. Verosika snaps her fingers signaling to whoever her guard hound she’s parading around is to go, both exiting the parking lot.

As soon as they're gone, Loona barges out of the van. “You guys know Verosika Mayday?”

“Oh, yeah, her, yeah, we dated.”

“Yeah. Same.”

“Wait. You both dated Verosika Mayday?”

"Apparently."

“Ha! Now that’s karma.”

“Shut up, Moxxie,” Blitzø tells him.

“Was it before or after she became a popstar?” Millie asks.

“Sir. You dated a popstar?”

“Okay, why are you all acting like thats such a shock? Where's all that negative energy for y/n?”

“Hello? It’s Verosika Mayday.” Loona says, in a tone that's meant to shove it in his face that what they're trying to say is obvious.

“It’s… you.” Millie adds.

“I just- I mean, y/n is understandable. But you? Was she suffering some form of brain damage?”

“Okay, look, you are all making this into a way bigger deal than it needs to be. I don't pry into your stupid personal lives.”

A chorus of different ways to tell him he does, all the time, erupts from the three, you even joining in with a “dude, yeah you do.”

“What was sex with her like?” Millie asks you, and you feel like you’re going to short-circuit. This is not something you want to get into right now.

“Millie!” Moxxie exclaims before you can even say anything in return.

“What? She’s a popstar! You'd wanna know what sex with Michael Crawford was like.”

Moxxie opens his mouth to dispute her but stops himself. “Touché.”

“So, tell me later?” Millie asks you.

“Just drop it!" Blitzø exclaims. "Millie, find a temporary spot for that truck, okay?” He throws the keys to her. “Looney, Moxxie, Y/n, let’s go handle this shit.”

You take the elevator, and Loona begins to nervously pull on her hair. “Do you think they saw me? Fuck, I did my makeup shitty today.”

“Oh, you look perfect, Looney! Like alwaysss” Blitzø tells her, and she rolls her eyes.

“Shut up da- Blitz.” She shoves him away.

“You look great, Loons. Not coming from your dad.”

“Ugh, don’t say ‘dad’,” Loona complains, storming off, presumably to the office, but bumps into the hellhound Verosika had been with in the parking lot, who you assume is her bodyguard.

Loona stutters as she tries to apologize for bumping into him, clearly flustered, and hey, you get why.

Blitzø notices it too, though, and immediately goes into protective dad mode, throwing himself between the two. “Aww, big man, where’s yout bitch bag of an employer?”

The bodyguard doesn’t seem amused by Blitzø’s try at being intimidating, a bored-as-ever look on his face. “She’s in her office. There wasn’t room on the second floor, so they rented one here on this one,” he explained, pointing at the door….

The door right across from the I.M.P. office.

Great. Awesome. Fucking fantastic.

“Oh, come on!” Blitzø exclaims, frustrated as well.

The guy laughs and shrugs before walking out. “Sorry, man.”

“Oh, no, you don’t, bitch,” Blitzø mumbles under his breath, eyes trained on Verosika’s door.

Moxxie chimes in. “Sir! How about you let me go in and try to reason with her? You two clearly have a history with her, but I’ll be immune to her insults! I don’t really listen to what’s classified as ‘pop genre’ music, so her status to me is-”

“Moxxie, shut the fuck up and go,” Blitzø interrups, and Moxxie goes on his way, entering the office. Through the blurred glass wall, you could make out the silhouette of Verosika and two other concubi.

From outside, it’s still possible to hear what he says to her, and it is pitiful. “Hello Ms…. Verosika, was it? I work for IMP and it is actually rather important for us to retain the singular parking space we were assigned, because-”

One of the concubi interrupts him, and you swear you find the voice familiar. “Aw, look at the little one! He’s got a little bowtie!”

“Please don’t condescend me, ma’am. I’m-”

An incubus pops out of nowhere, offering to do something you can’t quite make out to him.

“A… kind offer, but… I’m married.”

Verosika leans down to Moxxie’s level. “Hey, why don’t you send a little message from me back to your limp-dick boss and his new girlfriend?”

Oh fuck, oh fuck-

They’re on him in a second, the true forms showing through the blurred glass as silhouettes..

“Shit, Moxxie!”

“Moxxie, don’t let her access any of your holes!” Blitzø yells at him.

“We should go inside!” You tell him, but it’s a mere second before Moxxie’s thrown out the door. You help him get up, and you can’t help but worry if he’s okay. “Mox?”

“I- I gotta go lie down, now,” he tells you, walking into the I.M.P. office.

For a second, Blitzø looks worried about him too. And then that’s replaced with anger. “Oh, this won’t stand!” He screams, kicking open the door to Verosika’s new office and promptly yelling at her. “Alright, cunt, that’s it! If you’re gonna be shitty to my employees, then I challenge you to a fucking…challenge! Fuck, I said that twice.”

“Is this imp boy starting a demon duel?” Fuck. It’s Izabeth. That’s why the voice was familiar. You remember being her friend too. Now she glanced at you as you stood by the door like you were nothing.

All of them did.

“I think he is!” Verosika replies, seemingly excited. “What’s the game, then, Blitzo?” Of course she insisted in calling him that, too.

“Every year you STD spreaders go up topside for easy picking while Spring Break is a prime time for crime of all kind.” You know he says it to hurt her, but his words hurt you too. Does he think that about you, too? Is that how he sees you? Is that how they all see you? There’s not much time to dwell on that just then. He keeps on. “So I bet you succu-bitches can’t fuck as many people as we can off by the end of the day.”

They all laugh at him, and, yeah, you would too if you were in their place, probably.

When Blitzø doesnt back down, she leans down to be at face-level with him. “Oh, you’re serious? Well, then we’re gonna talk rules.”

“Rules? You fuck and we kill why would we need rules?”

“Her.” She points at you with a gloved claw, and your eyes widen. “She can’t seduce anyone to lure them to be killed.”

“What? That’s bullshit!”

“Hey, I’m only making things fair! Seducing the humans is our thing. And you wouldn’t believe how good she is at that. There would be none left for us, would there?” she grins.

“Oh fuck you, Verosika,” you say, tired of the witty remarks about the past you so desperately wanted to bury.

“Bet you still would if I let you.” She leans down to face Blitzø once again. “Fair?”

“Okay. We don’t need that anyway.”

“Alright then. Game on, bitch.”

[. . .]

Blitzø manages a whole two seconds of silence as you walk to the office before he just has to say something. “So. Ya wanna tell me what that whole thing was about?”

“What do you mean?”

“The way she was acting super shady and talking shit about you? She said she’d let you explain what you did to her and that’s saying something cause when it comes to me? Oh she looooves talking about what I did to her.”

“I don’t really want to talk about it.”

“Huh. I’ll get it out of you somehow. But. Apparently you were like some sort of human seducing machine is what I hear? Why do we take so little advantage of that?”

“Cause we don’t need to. I’m an assassin now. I kill. I don’t need to seduce anyone to do that.”

“Okay! Okay, geez. Whatever. But don’t think I forgot whatever that was about you being on some “big guy’s watchlist”.”

You wish he would.

The two of you are the last ones to enter the meeting room, and you take a seat next to Loona as Blitzø stands in front of the big white board with stupid shit drawn all over it.

“Alright, shut your assholes! Here’s how we’re gonna do this shit.” He pulls out a drawing of yourselves, seemingly out of nowhere, and points to it as if it explained everything, when in reality it was pretty much indecipherable. “First, we find a fuck ton of clients. We portal up. We have our fun murder time as per usual. We pile all the bodies into a big fucking canoe. We push said canoe into some water. We light it on fire to attract the sharks and eagles and maybe a goose too, fuck it. They come and eat the bodies, we win the bet, we rub it in that sloppy bitch’s drunken whore-ass face, do you have any questions?”

“A canoe?” You ask.

“Why do we have to light them on fire?” Millie follows.

“Uh, yeah, why was that nonsense?”

“That one wasn’t a question.”

“That wasn’t a plan.”

“I’m sorry, that was a flawless presentation of what we should do, Mox, it’s not my fault you got a smooth little brain upstairs.”

“A what, now?”

“I’m calling you slow, Moxxie. God, why don’t you learn to take criticism, you talentless baby fucked troll?”

Moxxie climbs up to stand on the table, fuming. “Why don’t you take an art class?”

“Why don’t you see how expensive they are?” Blitzø yells back, pulling on the collar of Moxxie’s dress shirt.

“Hey, is there a way I can come with you guys this time?” Loona questions, nonchalant, interrupting whatever it was that was happening between the two and making everyone turn to look at her.

“Absolutely not, I forbid it. Not gonna happen. Sorry, sweetie, Spring Break is no place for young, vulnerable goth girls. You know the kind of freaks up there who drool all over you!”

“Just let the girl go, Blitzø,” you tell him, and he gives you a dirty look.

“Yeah, Blitz! I can blend in with humans easy enough. Just let me tag along!”

“Wait. Say that again.”

“I can… blend in with humans?”

“Do you have a human disguise?” Millie asks her, and you stop to think of it too. Since when has that been going on? Everyone’s seen yours plenty enough, even though you didn’t use it every single time you went up. How did you somehow miss the fact that Loona had a disguise of her own?

“Yeah, don’t all of you? I’ve seen y/n’s.”

The three share looks between each other, similar looks of deer caught in headlights.

“Wait. Are you the only one who has one?” Loona asks you.

“Well, yeah.”

“The three dickheads have been screwing around on Earth this whole fucking time without human disguises? And you’ve been letting them?”

“Hey how’s that my fault? Not like I can conjure disguises for them.”

“Hey now, we have to focus here! New plan. Y/n’s not allowed to use her human disguise cause apparently she’s this huge human awe-ing machine or something. But they didn’t say we couldn’t use Looney’s. Looney, you can help lure the humans to us and we’ll take care of the rest. Real simple, yeah?”

“Wait what’s that about a human aweing machine?” Moxxie questions.

“Unimportant,” you reply.

“How about the new plan, then?” Blitzø asks.

“Flawless logic,” Millie says.

“I think you’re missing the biggest issue, sir. Isn’t it crucial to have a client who demands enough kills to win this bet? We aren’t just going up to massacre!”

Moxxie has a point. But, surprisingly, it seems Blitzø has thought of that already.

“I got that covered.”

Blitzø takes out a blank piece of paper, scribbling away on it with the markers you bought him for his birthday a few months prior. After finishing whatever it was he was doing with it, he takes you all outside, revealing the handmade flyer as he glued it to a lamppost just outside the building.

Spring break

Victim

50% off!!

It even had a drawing of his very happy doodle-self beside a decapitated person and, naturally, various horse drawings scattered around the page that had nothing to do with anything. As charming as it was, there was really no way this single tiny flyer could attract anyone, let alone enough clients to have you win the bet with Verosika.

“Now, we wait.”

Moxxie voices thoughts similar to yours. “Sir, there is no way we are going to get enough clients by the end of the day with one poorly spelled, bad-grammar flyer!”

It takes less than a single minute for the street to be packed with people waiting in line in front of it.

Blitzø opens a cocky grin, laughing at Moxxie and elbowing his side before walking up to the first few people in line. “Now, who’s first?”

Okay, maybe he had this under control, after all. Huh.

[. . .]

Satan, Spring Break was… the exact same.

It was the absolute same as it ever had been, down to the thick, thick scent of hormones, sweat and bodily fluids mixed with sunscreen and a hint of weed, up to the obnoxiously loud music and even more obnoxiously loud people.

As annoying as it was to think of it now,, Spring Break did serve you a great deal in the past. Easiest, quickest way to human sex you’d ever encountered. The weeks of Spring Break could be enough to saciate a concubus’ need to go up for a long time if you were smart about it.

They were supposed to be enough, at least.

It’s been quite a few years since you’ve been up on Earth during this time of the year. Ozzie would not be pleased to hear about it, and he’d probably still go on and on about how irresponsible and careless you were being, but if you could get through this, and you truly felt you could, then maybe you could make him proud, too. Happy for you, even.

Well. Nothing like a little murder to get your mind off of things these past couple years. What’s some more?

“Now, remember, we can’t be seen, alright? And loose shots will likely cause a panic, so Loona can help with leading targets to a better spot to off ‘em. You got thhe, Looney?”

Loona takes a sniff at the piece of paper before nodding, standing up to change into her human disguise. Blitzø beams at her appearance.

“Oh, Looney, look at you, you look downright awful! I am so proud. Now fetch!” He points to the packed beach, and she does as said.

Luring the humans was going rather easily with Loona’s help. Blitzø wasn’t wrong, they were all over her. All it took was a look and a ‘come here’ motion, and she could take them wherever she needed: dark alleys where Blitzø could blow their heads off with a gun as she leaned back and watched, by the bridge where Millie could push them to their death and Moxxie could take care of the body, by some hidden corner where you could behead them… yeah, things were going pretty okay, and you had nine kills in no time.

Blitzø was just bragging about it to no one in particular when her voice came on.

“Alright, Spring Breakers! Y’all ready to get fucked up and make som ebitching bad choices?” Verosika announces from up on the stage, where she stood in her human disguise while huge pink-colored screens read ‘fuck you blitzo’ on them in block letters all around her.

“Fuck, she’s gonna sing. We’re not gona stand a chance,” you say, more to yourself than anyone else.

And that’s exactly what she does. “This is your final boarding call. All aboard.”

Pack your bags

Sun’s out

Take a vacay, babe

Take it straight to bonetown

V-time, free time, baby, relax

Self-care, no hair, brazilian wax

Hornt-up, succu-bus to the beach

Catch some rays while catching some D

It takes less than a whole minute for all the concubi she’d come up to earth with to find themselves busy with one, two or more humans each. Which makes up more than the total kills up until now.

“Goddamnit, that bitch started her goadish mating call! Now she’s gonna win all these sex maniacs, we gotta pick things up, guys.”

You nod in agreement, motioning to a guy throwing up beside you. “How about him?”

“Is he on the list, Looney?” Blitzø asks, but she’s… distracted. Of course, it’s pretty clear what’s going on.

“Yeah. Yeah I think so,” she replies, and it doesn’t reassure you at all, not when her whole undivided attention is trained on the Vortex guy who you have to admit looks pretty hot in his human disguise. And hey, he looked human but he wasn’t human, so you wonder if it would- no. Fuck, no. You’re not here for anything other than killing the targets in the list.

Loona’s reply seems enough for Blitzø, who grabs an axe from who-the-fuck-knows-where and quite literally slices the man in half after getting asked if he’s a leprechaun. “Alright, Looney, c’mon, who’s next? Looney? Loon- Looney? Where’s my baby?”

Blitzø immediately panics as he can’t find her where she just was a second ago, and you grab him by the shoulders to turn him in her direction as she walks up to talk to Vortex, making to take care of disposing of the leprechaun guy’s corpse with Millie’s help as Blitzø just stares for a moment before following her.

Pack your bags

Sun’s out

Take a vacay, babe

Take it straight to bonetown

Verosika takes a swig out of a flask before yelling out “now, who wants a piece of this?” and throwing it to the audience. The liquid ends up spilled into many people’s drinks as it flies through the air before landing on the ocean water, and it takes about three seconds for your suspicions about what was in the flask to be proven right as you notice the way people are acting now- that sure as shit wasn’t just alcohol..

You and Millie find Moxxie after you’re done, and he’s watching Blitzø pathetically try to cockblock Loona. He sighs. “Aaaan, we’ve lost him. It’s looking like it’s up to us to handle this list. You wanna make sure he doesn’t blow our cover?” He asks you, and you sigh in annoyance.

“Not like I get to want anything.” You stand up regardless, making your way to where the three stood while Millie and Moxxie began their speed-run (speed-kill?) of the target list.

“What, I can’t have a break?” Is the first thing you hear from the conversation, coming from Loona.

You immediately interrupt, scolding Blitzø. “Blitz you need to get the fuck out of here you’re gonna get us into shit!”

“That’s exactly what I just said!” Loona tells you.

“That is exactly what she just said, actually,” Vortex comments and you ignore it.

“A break? We have a parking spot on the line!” Blitzø yells back, and you know he’s actually being protective of her but pretending it’s about something else.

Vortex decides to tell him off too. “Hey, dude, why dont you chill out?”

“Why don’t you stay out of it? ‘Kay? This is our business.” He holds up another one of his doodles with his tail for a second. “Literally.”

Loona growls in frustration at him. “Fuck, Blitz! Why can’t you stay out of my face for, like, five minutes?”

“Because I adopted you! And that should mean something!” He turns his back to her, crossing his arms over his chest stubbornly.

“Oh, what does it matter? You’re not my real dad. I was almost eighteen!”

“It still counts!”

“Well, it shouldn’t!”

“Loon-” you try to stop her. You know her well enough to know she’ll feel bad for saying whatever she’s saying right now, but it’s no use.

“No! I didn’t need him then and I don’t need him now. You hear that, Blitz? I. Don’t. Need. You!” She’s the one to turn her back to him this time, and he looks back at her with tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

“Okay, look, I know that hurt, but you can’t be out here, Blitz.”

“But- but Looney-”

“She just wants to talk to a cute guy without getting embarrassed. Let her be normal. She doesn’t mean it.”

“Oh how are you so fucking sure, huh? You keep secrets.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” You ask him as you shove him away from the large group of people.

“Yeah I said it. You’re a- you’re a secret keeper! Who are you to know if people mean what they say?”

“Blitz, if this is about what Verosika said-”

“Oh but it is! It is about what Verosika said! Or what she didn’t say actually. Do we even know you?”

“My life before you is none of your fucking business- fuck.” you lose track of what you were going to yell at him when you see Moxxie get thrown in the air, getting exposed to a few people around where he lands on the sand. Blitzø’s eyes follow yours.

“Ah! Oh, my god, it’s a fucking possum!” A woman exclaims, pointing at Moxxie, to which he curses under his breath before some guy grabs him from the ground and shoves him into a beer cooler, immediately throwing it around in the air with Moxxie inside.

“Come on, we gotta go help Mox out,” you tell Blitzø.

“Ya hear that, Looney? I’m gonna go kill something. You enjoy your break!” He childishly yells to her.

You find Moxxie at the same time as Millie does. Pulls the cooler’s lid open and he falls out of it, clearly drunk off his mind from the beer. She stands over him and he calls out her name excitedly from where he lies on the sand. “Millie! Hi. Hey. Hey, where did you get four heads? I wanna kiss ‘em!” He makes grabby hands and a kissy face at her, to which she just smiles in return at the drunken state he’s in. It’s sweet, actually.

“Come on, Mox,” she mumbles before helping him stand up. He’s so wasted he needs to lean on her to keep himself standing.

“You guys okay?” Blitzø asks her.

“Yeah, we-” Millie starts, but is interrupted by… well…

“Ooh! Fish!” Moxxie exclaims, giggling, as he points to the huge, monstrous creature that rose out of the ocean, killing everything in it’s way out of the water and causing panic to overcome everyone in the beach, resulting in a screaming, bloody mess all over.

Personally, that’s not the word you’s use for it, but sure. A fish.

The fish captures Moxxie with its gross, gigantic tongue, pulling him towards itself before attempting to swallow the imp. Fuck.

Millie shares a look with you before promptly killing a man, stealing the glass bottle he held and improvising a molotov cocktail, throwing it at the creature and stunning it enough to fall back in the shallow part of the water. “Kill the rest of ‘em! Go!” She yells out to you and Blitzø, which is enough for you to trust her to solve the situation on her own.

You and Blitzø resume to killing whoever more you could identify as targets, a harder task now that they were panicking and running around in a frenzy, but you manage to get about six before Millie’s done, cutting the creature’s tongue off as it held Moxxie and sending him flying over towards Blitzø, where Blitzø, who manages to catch him in his arms, making one of the targets shocked enough for you to put a bullet though their head.

Millie finally begins to walk up to where you are after killing the monster, chest heaving with heavy breaths and spitting a little blood on the sand, but otherwise okay.

“Is Mox alright?” Is the very first thing she asks.

“Oh, yeah, he’s fine! Way to show off, Mills!” Blitzø yells, and she smiles. You give her a fist bump as she approaches you before she grabs a giggling Moxxie off of Blitzø’s arms, and she can’t help but laugh herself.

“This is funny. I’m soooooo drinky.”

She squeezes him tight and you smile at the interaction.

You only get so much smiling time when Verosika’s around.

“Blitzø.” She calls, and you all turn to see her standing with her arms crossed over her chest.

“Oh, perfect! That must be the whores!” He quips.

“I only see two whores around here and they’re right in front of me.”

“Hey you watch your filthy fucking mouth.”

“That was handled rather… obviously, don’t you think?”

Millie picks up Verosika’s flask form the sand, holding it up before throwing it to her. “I don’t think this belongs to any of us. Would be a shame if anyone found out you guys were behind a giant monster fish in the human world.”

“Yeah y/n here could tell the big Oz himself. He wouldn’t be very thrilled, don’t ya think?” Blitzø is quick to threaten.

“Ha! She should be more worried about him finding out she’s up here right now.”

“Go fuck yourself. He’s not the boss of me. He’s the boss of you, though, isn’t he?”

Moxxie laughs obnoxiously. “Oh, Satan! You got yourself fucked!”

“Yeah, well, you three nasty-ass gremlins will be in shit for not being in disguises." She turns to face you, a bitter, hostile grin taking over her features. "And you! Your little friend already took your crystal privileges away. You wanna be a bigger disappointment?"

“Don't act like you fucking know him."

Moxxie falls over face-first onto the sand between you. “A human called me a possum. I am not a possum!” He slurs out.

“Hold on, crystal privileges?" Blitzø questions you.

It's Verosika who answers, though. “She not tell you about it?" She lets out a laugh. "Doesn’t shock me.”

Fuck. “Verosika-”

“You little fucks never wondered why she doesn't have one?”

“What do you mean? She gets one from Ozzie when she needs it like all of you freaks-" Blitzø immediately defends.

“Oh, Blitzo, you really are fucking stupid, aren't you?" She interrupts him. "She used to have one."

No. “Ver, come on-”

“Don't! Call me that. No. You're gonna hear me say what you did." She turns back to Blitzø, the same rage in her eyes as when she recalled all the ways he'd wronged her in the past, earlier that day. "Your little girlfriend here was forbidden from coming up to Earth without Ozzie’s permission for years.”

“What?” Millie asks, and it seems accidental that she says it out loud.

“Yeah. Sorry-ass had to be babysat every time she had to come up. On a watchlist like a freakin' criminal, cause, well- she kind of is." She eyes you up and down before she spits out "I'm surprised you can even be here right now. Congratulations.”

“Well duh? Of course she's a criminal. That's kind of what we do.”

“Oh, Blitzo, the killing thing you guys do is adorable. But no one bats an eye at a little murder, it's Hell. No, she broke demon law." And, then, the final threat of a carefully blocked out, written-over past, coming to haunt you in the form of her. "You wanna tell them your record time or should I?”

“You have no fucking right-”

“I have every right! I have every right. It was five months, two weeks and two days. You know how pathetic that is?"

“That supposed to mean something, bitch?” Millie growls, protective.

“Other than her being a whore, no,” Verosika shrugs.

“What does that even mean?” Moxxie asks her.

“She stayed up here for five months, two weeks and two days straight once when we were dating. I was worried sick, we fucking lived together too. And then I find out she’s been up here fucking whatever human that came into her line of sight instead of coming back home.”

“I’m- it’s not-”

“‘It’s not what you think, Ver, I swear!’” She mocks. “Boo-fucking-hoo! Now she’s on a watchlist cause Asmodeus for some fucking reason liked her enough to just be worried instead of actually punishing her.”

“I wasn’t in my right mind, you have no fucking-” fuck, you’re voice is trembling now.

“Save it, bitch.”

Blitzø notices your discomfort, deciding it’s better to go home and solve whatever this mess was there. He walks up to Verosika. “Look. We keep this pathetic little b-movie scene on the down low and you let us use the parking space. She doesn’t tell her lusty bff about what you did and everyone lives happily ever after. Deal?”

“Fine,” Verosika says through gritted teeth. “But I hate you.”

“Don’t care. We fucking won!”

[. . .]

“So… you don’t have to talk about it, but… please talk about it. What was that?” Millie asks you, careful.

You sigh. Maybe this time there’s no running from it.

A/N: genuinely don’t even know of this is good vut alas! we’re so back! sorry for the long wait lol love y’all

[anachilles]

Hi!!

Just read all of your firehouse!au and I’m obsessed!

I saw your post about Chick observing them once they’re in a relationship and being pleased with the way he sees Gale take care of John.

Curious if you have any moments planned/HC of ways John takes care of Gale in this universe?

Loved the chapter where John helps out at the bar after seeing Gale is still a bit sick/behind on school btw! Does he ever get to be Gale’s person in those vulnerable moments?

Thanks for writing this and sharing it! (will be re-reading by next week LOL)

Hi anon!

First of all: thank you so much for the Firehouse love! I'm so so glad you're enjoying the story! 🥰

In terms of the ways in which John takes care of Gale, in my mind it mirrors the way we see it even just in the actual canon events of the show, just in a modern context where they're allowed to kiss lol.

As you've touched on, he's an acts of service fiend. Gale's very hyper-independent, by virtue of having to be growing up, and so John always gets a little thrill when he can anticipate something he might need before he even realises it himself - or something he has realised but won't just outright ask John for - and take care of it.

This often goes hand-in-hand with John's magpie-like tendencies and his inability to walk into any store without seeing something to bring back for Gale, something that either reminds him of him, or something that he knows he either needs or simply would enjoy. Like John will text him on his way home asking if he wants anything from the store because hey, he has to stop anyway, and Gale will say no but God knows John will come back with his favourite chocolate bar or a packet of Milano cookies.

(because it'll be a cold day in hell before Gale Cleven and his notorious sweet tooth will ever be able to pass up sweets, lol).

Assorted Other Ways In Which John Takes Care of Gale:

Contrary to popular belief, Gale does in fact have a car, and can actually drive. Not that you'd think that if you only met him after he and Bucky got together. Driving Buck around as much as possible is, like, part of Bucky's love language at this point (Gale's an incredibly competent driver but he's also a bit of a menace when it comes to speed and risky manoeuvres). Living that passenger princess life fr.

Growing to love Maverick like his own, even if he is to some extent "the spare human" in her eyes, lol. Takes care of her when Gale's not there without even thinking about it. When Gale gets home from campus, or the bar late at night, and finds the two of them lounging on the couch with Mav sprawled across Bucky's chest 🥺

In a literal, material, sense Bucky has tried to help Gale out financially in the past - whether that be a bit of help with the bills, groceries etc ("because hey, I come around here so much, I may as well contribute"), or by insisting on paying for stuff on their dates. He doesn't really think twice about it, it isn't a big deal to him - he's by no means rich but he has a decent job and is well off enough. Gale does okay but he's still studying and working essentially two jobs. It just makes sense to him, but it's one of the only things that causes real friction between them because it can make Gale feel uncomfortable.

Speaking of Gale working on a PhD and doing some teaching at the university and doing bar work - he inevitably gets burnt out. Where he'd push through before by hook or by crook, Bucky's getting better at prying him away from his laptop when he's been going at it for so long he's starting to look stuck, or frustrated, or tired. Makes sure he eats. On the days where Gale has to wear all three hats it's making sure the little things needing done around the house are done so he doesn't have to worry about them.

[internetprincess420]

hanamiya makoto hcs yayyyy

cw: fem!reader, nsfw themes at the end, mentions of kids, mentions of pussy, ooc!makoto?

also this is my first time writing anything since 2021 so pls don’t be mean 💔 i had a random night time urge to write something freaky and this is it. if you have any suggestions, reqeusts, ideas, or anything of the sort feel free to send me a request LOL

:3

- he will hold your hand, play with your hair, kiss you, etc, but he doesn’t overdo it

- prefers to call you by your name, but his nicknames of choice include sweetheart, peach, and princess

- random but if he was from america he would 100% be from the south and call you sugar, honey, and darling

- he HATES talking to your friends lowkey but not in a dickhead manipulator way more like a “i wanna go home and sleep and i hate talking to people” way

- he lets you bully him

- definitely on a leash but doesn’t want to accept it

- definitely has anger/mental health issues and unintentionally blows up at you sometimes

- but he feels awful and is actively working on bettering himself for you

- you quickly lay down the law that the way he acts and the way he hurts innocent people doesn’t fly with you

- no girl has ever really stood up to him before and he really likes the fire in your eyes and slowly starts to change

- his favorite dates are those that are at home on the couch or getting takeout and sitting on a park bench

- you two play basketball together and he lets you win

- he has such a deep appreciation for the women in his life and has always wanted to be a girl dad

- secretly a nerd and probably convinces you to play magic the gathering and probably threatened you to keep it a secret

(nsfw !)

- he LOVES loves loves lovesss to kiss your neck both in a sexual and non-sexual way

- thigh guy for sure

- loves to lay his head between them and kiss the inside of them

- this guy is a pussy fiend i’ll tell you that right now

- he loves to give head

- makoto is so kind 🖤

- seriously he eats you out like he’s a starving man

- and he also likes when you cum while his face is between your legs

- i’d say it’s 6 inches, veiny, thick, and pale

- contrary to popular belief, i think he’s 100% a virgin

- like he’s had the opportunity to fuck but he just doesn’t because he is waiting for the right person

- which is also why i think he is so good at eating pussy

- he has so much dick and doesn’t know how to use it

- lovessssss when you tell him what to do with it

- cums the hardest when you ride him

- loves to sit against the headboard and just watch you on top of him

- loves hickies but prefers to leave them and have them in places only you two can see

- borderline breeding kink

(nsfw over)

- he wants to marry you

- you are the reason he wants to be successful

- i think he likes your openness and the way you are so encouraging to him

- it’s so different from what he knows

- i think he will want 1 kid at first, and he wants a baby girl

- but after your beautiful baby girl is born, he will want another one so his baby girl isn’t lonely

- the second one is also a girl

- he loves to play house husband and cook and clean and get your girls ready and dressed

- all in all he gets a 10/10

[strip4kaneshiro]

Cole Cassidy x Texan! reader domesticity headcanons

hiii it’s Kay again LOL. My first comeback piece and it’s Overwatch head canons LMAO. Felt some type of way about writing headcanons about real people so we’re moving on to fictional characters as the lord intended. As of rn, I’m fixated on Cassidy, Reaper, and Lifeweaver as my faves. So expect me to write about them TRUST

You and him defo live on a small ranch back in his home state of Texas together

this takes place in a universe where Overwatch is a lil more flexible with him than before, so don’t worry too much about the logistics ok???

Not close too his hometown though ( he’s still wanted there, rip), so you end up choosing a ranch set of land south enough to still be able to reach the coast if wanted. Cole was adamant about being able to take beach road trips

Let’s you do majority of the interior decorating, while he focuses on upkeeping the outdoors of your home

In the process of choosing yalls house and moving in, contrary to popular belief, Cassidy was the super picky one

I swear you had to change real estate agents twice because he wouldn’t stop nitpicking LMAO, but all for good reason, He just wants the best for his darling <3

He will NEVER wake you up earlier than 9 am for any reason unless it’s a doctors appointment or a road trip. Babes just wants to watch you sleep

“Cole! It’s 10:30! You weren’t gonna wake me up?!” You chastise, jumping out of bed and pulling stray hairs out your face

“Now why would I disturb your peace?” and he flashes that damn cowboy charming smile smh i hate him so bad

If your into skincare stuff, he simply watches you in amazement as you go through a multi step routine

Begins asking you to help him, not because he cares much about his skin, but he loves to see you yap about what you love

(Please free this man from the 14 in 1 in the shower)

Bro CANNOT keep his hands off of you for any reason and it makes everyone both envious and uncomfortable

If you’re in the kitchen, hands wrapped around your waist from the side. Doing laundry? He’s leaning on your shoulder and simply watching.

Depending on if Overwatch needs him, he will force them to give him a 14 hour notice so he can tell you. Cole never wants you to wake up confused and alone like how he did Ashe and Deadlock gang

Speaking of, expect to see the, very often in your house. They all just decided y’all’s house was the hangout spot like a bunch of high schoolers

He doesn’t appreciate how Ashe and you team up to tease him

Ended up getting two dogs and a cat with him.

The cat loves you but cannot stand being near Cole unless it’s bribed (male cat)

“Oh, did your wife give you those scratches Cass?” (Baptiste)

Cole begrudgingly acknowledges the scratches on his shoulders and back during a training session.

He forces you to trim his claws and get him a scratching post when he gets back home

If you drink coffee/tea/matcha, he leaves enough hot water in the coffee pot so you can make whatever you choose. Or if he knows, he just does it himself and leaves it for you warm cold (ik some of you r iced coffee fiends)

Cole takes you on shopping trips every couple of months because he loves to spoil you, he even carries all the bags without one single complaint! (He gets to flex his ranch muscles)

Don’t let it be a nice day over 70 degrees, this man will take any chance he gets to have as little clothing on as possible around you (Why he does this we don’t know)

Catch him in a tank top or no shirt at all doing yard work while you lay in a chaise , tanning or quietly reading.

He wouldn’t have it any other way though, he loves working hard for the ones he loves.

So as the day comes to the end, and you come outside with some iced tea for him, he wipes as much sweat as he can off of himself before leaning over and kidding the top of your head.

“I love you, darlin’.” He’ll mutter, before wrapping his toned arms around you and embracing you

[beneathsilverstars]

you could. probably think if some characters are texture eaters and if so which textures they would prefer or what reactions they'd have over disliked textures

@kimdokjafan replied

I would love to hear what you have to say about the party's food preferences! Things like favorite food, things they dislike/won't eat

i started answering this anon and then got this reply, so i'll combine them. got really long lol, food is such a complex topic!

bonnie enjoys the multi-textured fish head, so they're probably big on texture! i think they're starting to have enough cooking experience to get put off when a texture isn't correct. like the problem isn't the texture itself but rather that rice should not be like that, they overcooked it, yuck, ugh! they would probably make a new batch if possible. however, they're also used to eating what you have because it's all you have — sometimes the nice neighbor drops off her shitty mac n cheese and it's better than nothing, or you mix up salt and sugar for today's bread but you're almost out of flour — so they'll try to come up with a new use for the fucked-up batch where the weird texture works better, or just eat it themself. unpleasant, but better than serving it to someone else or wasting it! as for what they enjoy the most: lots of different textures mixed together, like a salad or deluxe burrito. and chewy things!

we know bonnie's favorite foods are pineapple, rice, and samosas. i'd say they love sweet things as most kids do, but they're really starting to prefer a little more complexity to their sweet treats, like the tart acidity of pineapple. rice is a great favorite bc it's a comforting plain staple, but it can also be used in such a variety of dishes, as the entire base or to add texture! bonnie likes spicy, sour, etc... bring on the flavor! honestly i don't think there's many ingredients they don't like, it's more often a case of that flavor doesn't go there, why would you do that??? maybe they haven't grown into bitter vegetables yet.

siffrin also likes the fish head, so they really enjoy a fun texture, and they like trying new foods as they travel — but when they don't like something they hate it. but they also hate to raise a fuss! so if they're eating with other people, they'll try to just eat around the offending element without making it too obvious that's what they're doing, and then claim they're just not that hungry. if they're by themself, they'll spit it out and rinse out their mouth and eat something crunchy. they don't like tomatoes, which is convenient bc they also don't like when sandwich bread gets soggy at all. they don't like mushrooms or caramalized onion. they enjoy super crunchy things and a nice thick soup!

we know malanga fritters are presumably his favorite. i think he likes mashed potatoes too. fish, of course, and hearty stews. he loves clam chowder! he used to be a big sweet pastries fan, but post-canon he pivots to fruity sweetness bc he can't stand caramel-marshmallow-candy sweetness anymore, and even fruit's on thin ice. most of his disliked foods are about the texture, not the taste. but he's also really sensitive to associations - if he coincidentally gets sick after eating something, eats something badly seasoned, etc, it'll put him off of that taste for a while even if he doesn't remember why.

iirc isabeau wasn't into the fish head. he likes simpler and more predictable foods! he gets yucked out by overripe fruits, but luckily it's usually pretty easy to tell if a fruit will be good. if he does accidentally bite into a bad one, he makes a face and swallows it as quickly as possible, and asks if anyone else wants the rest before he donates it to the local wildlife. he likes fluffy breads and nuts! he's the kind of guy to pack a stack of pb&js and an apple for lunch every day, just buying a different flavor of jam each time he runs out. he doesn't like anything too spicy or bitter! probably a cheese fiend too.

mirabelle isn't super particular about textures, but she is pickier about tastes; she doesn't like a couple common vegetables, like green beans and cooked carrots, and a couple common sauces, like mustard and marinara. she doesn't like nuts, but sometimes eats them anyway because they're so popular in dormont's house for some reason and she gets tired of refusing to eat them, and now she sorta hates them even more but also will absentmindedly stand there munching on them? in general if she doesn't like a food she's served she'll still try to eat enough to be polite, but sometimes can't manage it. some foods she loves are honey, olives, and apple pie. she does love plums too, but it's less that they're objectively her favorite taste and more that they're her thing. it's fun having a thing!

odile likes delicate textures like flaky pastries and watermelon, and doesn't like purely glop-based foods like oatmeal, though it's tolerable with a crunchy topping. she really enjoys a good meat, like a nice herby steak or buttery pork belly. she doesn't dislike sweets, but she doesn't indulge in them in often; when she does, she prefers lemony desserts or bitter chocolate. she finds most foods tolerable at least, and especially likes sharp flavors, like vinegar and vodka!

[pastelbatfandoms]

Daddy's Home

A/N: Obviously was inspired by Randy Orton coming back, plus it's been almost a year since I've watched WWE. Randy really wanted me to write him (or his higher self did lol) and kept appearing in my dream. So here ya go.

Warnings: Pure Smut, Daddy Kink

"I can only take you in small doses, loving's you explosive."- Small Doses~Bebe Rexha

I stormed down the hall, towards my hotel room. Upset of course at Randy, what else was new? This time though he was following me as I opened the room door and almos slammed it into his face.

Randy stopped it with his hand. "Roxy c'mon! What is it now?" He started to shout then lowered his voice, cooly.

As I whirled on him. My long dark hair flying behind me. "What is it now, Randy really? You come back and the first thing you do is flirt with Rhea!"

Randy stopped at that, raising his eyebrows in surprise. "That's what your worked up about? I wasn't flirting with her I was trying to get under her skin. Looks like I got under yours instead."

I crossed my arms, looking away. "It doesn't matter. You and I are not even together, but she is my friend. "

"True we're not. I get she's your friend but so what? I mean you been getting pretty close with her friend Damian Priest, haven't you?" Randy asked, eyeing me.

I looked at him then. "Why are you jealous? I've actually been gone for quite awhile Randy just like you. But yes I do find him attractive so? You going to take him away from me too."

Randy crossed his own arms, closing his eyes at that. "Rox I thought we were past this, I'm sorry about what happened with The Fiend and how I treated you, but It's not like I killed Bray."

I looked down, a bit sad. "I know. It wasn't anyone's fault. Regardless I don't think I can do this again with you Randy."

"I told you before how I feel Roxy. How we keep doing this, you say you don't want me and yet it's the same song & dance of not wanting anyone else too either." Randy said, walking slowly towards me.

I put a hand out to stop him. "Randy...I do want to be with you, I can't help it. I just don't want jealousy or possessiveness to get in the way."

Randy smirked at that, "I don't think that can be helped. That's just how we're wired especially me. But I can promise it won't go as far as it did before. Plus..." He grabbed the hand that was on his chest, as he went close to my ear and said in a low tone. " You like it when I get possessive over you in other ways, makes for great sex." He smirked at me.

I looked up at him,licking my lips. "True... Just don't hurt me again."

Randy shook his head the smirk gone. "I won't. I swear. Now how about you show Daddy how much you missed him." Randy whispered, running a hand through my hair.

I grinned up at him as I brought him down to kiss me, remembering how much I had missed him and forgetting what a great kisser he was as he gripped me to him and kissed me slow,deep and with passion, his tongue swirling around mine as we french kissed.

That's all it took as Randy pushed me against the wall. Making out with me roughly, as he bit my lip. "I need you so fuckin' bad." He growled.

"Then take me." I moaned out.

"How rough?" Randy asked, pulling my head back.

My eyes lit up. "As much as you want Daddy."

"Good answer." Randy gave me a wide grin as he licked up my neck.

Randy then stepped back to take his shirt off, as he undid his pants. I stared at his perfect body in awe. He stopped me before I could take my clothes off though. "Ah not yet. I thought you were going to show Daddy how much you missed him?"

With a dark glint in his eyes, Randy grabbed me around the neck and tongued me then growled "I want you on your knees."

I did as he said, as he gripped fistfuls of my hair, his cock already semi hard as I stroked him. I looked up into his lust blown gaze as he opened my mouth, running a thumb across my bottom lip. "Beautiful." He murmured, then brought his dick to my open mouth as I closed around it and started sucking.

Randy dropped his head back, closing his eyes with a groan as I went deeper, my tongue playing with the length of him. "Oh fuck yes Rox." He growled out.

Randy held the back of my head then as he thrust deeper, the tip of him rubbing the back of my throat, grinning when I gagged a bit. Then faster as he came down my throat. "Mmm good girl." He praised me after I swallowed.

I could feel myself getting even more turned on at that. "Daddy what about-" I started to ask what about me, when Randy grabbed me up, cutting me off as he nibbled my ear, kissing and biting my neck.

"Oh don't worry baby girl we are far from done." Randy breathed in my ear, my eyes closed and my head dropped back to rest on his naked chest, while he slowly ran his hands down my body, then reached up to undo my tight wrestling top.

Once it was off he palmed his hands over my breasts, pinching my nipples as I let out a whine. Then dragged his hands to part my legs as he slowly rubbed me over my latex wrestling shorts.

I squirmed as he touched me and he bit my neck in warning. "Ah don't you dare rush me. Enjoy it." He murmured, his voice low.

Randy did not rush sex, as was his nature, he was slow, methodical, sensual. And he made you feel every little thing he did to you.

Like now as pushed his hand into my shorts, his other hand playing with my breasts. I ground against him, already feeling his growing erection. He lightly played with my clit as he swiftly made me cum, then pushed two fingers in my cunt. "Take them off." He growled, as I shakily peeled off my shorts.

Randy spread my legs further apart as he ground against me. We were both naked this time and I felt his cock becoming even harder as he pushed against my ass.

I started to touch him but he slapped my hand away. "Nuh uh Babygirl. Daddy's not done playing with you." He denied me, as he pulled his fingers from not letting me cum a second time.

Smacking my ass when I whined in protest. "Daddy please.."

Randy snaked an arm around me then turning me to face him as he quickly grabbed me by the neck, pushing me against the wall again. "Wait." Is all Randy says raising an eyebrow at me.

Randy lets up on my throat then as he drags his hands down to play with my nipples again, then kneels down, slowly kissing up my thighs, then biting my inner thigh with an animalistic growl. My Viper.

My eyes closed in ecstasy as his tongue snakes out and he licks up me, with a satisfied sound. "Babygirl you are so wet." Randy's tongue delves into my pussy then as he fingers me, slowly. Randy tongues me slowly over and over again, tasting every inch of me as I clench around him, Randy stops, edging me. "Not yet." I bite my lip to keep from cumming.

Randy then brings his tongue to my clit then lightly as he opens his mouth to essentially make love to my pussy with his tongue. When he feels me getting closer, he flicks his tongue against my clit, hard but sensual over and over again. Randy looks up at me then, I open them long enough to stare at him, as soon as I meet those dark blue eyes with unspoken permission I cum in waves, shaking with a hand to his head as he eats me out.

Randy lets up then, standing up to give me a languid kiss, tasting myself on him. As he rubs against my opening, I whimper still sensitive but still wanting him as he well knows.

Randy smirks as he tells me, "Does my baby girl still want me? Beg for it."

I look up at him in lust and need. "Please Daddy, I need you."

"Mmmm. Where? Here." Randy touches my dripping cunt with his cock, "You want me inside of you..." Randy asks knowing full well he'd do it anyway as he rubbed his cock against me but never entering.

"Very much, please." I begged.

"Good." Was all Randy said as he placed one hand on the wall another gripping my thigh to raise my leg up. As he slowly entered me, I cry out in pleasure as he easily slid into me. He grabbed me up as I wrapped my legs around his firm waist, pulling his dick all the way out then pushing into me hard. Taking his time as he fucked me slowly.

I moaned out, and my eyes rolled back as he kept fucking me until I came again. One hand around my throat again as he kissed me hard biting my lip. "Fuck Rox, I'm going to cum soon." He groaned out.

"Cum for me Daddy." I whined out. As I dragged my nails down his back.

Randy sped up then as he went as deep as he could, cumming inside me with a loud moan his eyes closed and head back in pleasure. "Fuck yes baby."

Randy pulls out slowly then, kissing me softly, as he lets me down. As soon as our orgasms subside, though I am still shaking. Randy notices as he picks me up in his strong arms. "Easy Roxy. I got you."

"That was so good." I answered him with a dreamy smile still not all the way there. "I love you Randy."

"So good." Randy agrees as he holds me close, "I love you too Rox. Now let's get you to bed." Randy says as he carries me, still naked, to the bed.

Okay so we might have made love a second time instead of sleep. Hey he was that good and we were making up for lost time. Long overdue.

[austinsastrology8991]

> Mer{Cure}Y <

I gots some drugs for yall fiends > plug back <

1 > No one wants to talk to each other Hi how are you? good thanks :) Nice day isnt it. It for sure is! Hey wyd. not much wbu. Im chilling. Same lol. what are you doing? Im watching something on youtube. Oh nice. Wbu? im watching anime. Oh cool. No wonder we are all fiends for some entertainment, because we are incapable of entertaining each other. 2 > The insecurity of not sounding smart makes everyone conform into a retarded form of one another. We all have the same views. The same topics are constantly being brought up. And when someone speaks about something new, everyone loses interest because no one can handle the reality that maybe they don't know something. Oh and the only reason you listen to each other is to get something from that person whether that be attention, or clout or whatever the fuck you define as your ends. Since most of us, are in a state of fear, we aren't able to talk about something we don't know about. 3 > Mercury is about confidence. And most of yall bite your tongues but love to act tough. Every person who has told me they are hard, is incapable of pushing the envelope. I think you are more caught up with your own image, and are afraid of not appearing tuff. But guess what true courage is about revolting against whats normal, or the courage to be wrong. Show dont tell true?. ANd im done hearing about whoever the fuck you think you are. Show me something interesting dont tell me what you think you are. Don't tell me what you want me to hear. 4 > Conversations are being ruined by people who are constantly telling others they are wrong. Excuse me fucker. But are you capable of arguing against me? No beyond that. Can you stick to the conversation at hand, or are you going to source the same sources every SJW ever has cited. Your not even a real person, your just mimicrying beliefs you believe in. Pathetic tbh. Hey whatever more people will agree with you because we are all jsut looking for a place to belong. so good for you. You chose the easy way out bravo. I thought conversations were a place to discuss and learn. But your so focused on being correct. to me you look wrong, but you do 'sound' right because well .. to reiterate we all want to be right so we band together with whats acceptable. 5 > School fucked you. You were told to sit down and stfu. and if you were invested in to the conversation in the class room. You were memed on by all ur class mates. School breeds insecurity, and teaches people to sit down. Thats why some of yall are so forceful in standing up for yourself. Trying to break the chains of the past. And before you point the finger at me. Don't shoot the messenger. we were all brainwashed, I dont blame anyone trying to change the foundations of your past, considering how fucked it all really is 6 > "Im not that smart" This is just an excuse. Learning everyone can do. You just need to concentrate and put effort in. "oh I canT beCauSe I HaVe ADHD" well my bad just take more of that meth shit that way you can turn into mini hitler and become smart I guess. Also if your so insecure go cry to your psychologists like ffs. Eveyrone can be smart. YOu just need to develop your confidence > Rule 3 <

7 > You learn from what you see. monkey see monkey do. if your surrounded by a bunch of dumb cunts. YOur a dumb cunt now. If your being put down by people in your clique you are surrounded by negativity. If your being constantly praised for nothing you are surrounded by yes man. Find diversity. use discrepency. Its perfectly okay to judge people. stop suppressing that urge to appear 'normal' Many people are not normal but we are so caught up in trying to act normal when we are all pretty fucky 8 > The past was different and so will be the future. Would you shut the fuck up with the pessmism. Things will change. You need to be open to receiving it. You've had happy times as much as youve had bad times. ANd if your trapped in a big pit hole of death. well you better get climbing because no one can be bothered to help anyone anymore because we are probably the most selfish we've ever been ever (social mediaaaaasaa) and the adults are still trying to adjust to the internet because the world been flipped (itll flip again) 9 > No one cares about your opinion more than you Thats why your so uncomfortable speaking your truth. Because everyone is more into their own truths. So we practise the art of self affirmation by denying other peoples truths. When everything exists for a reason. WE are so caught up in making our own manifestations true by denying others 'truths.' Selfish cunts.... But hey wtf am I saying Im just an anonymous pluto I don't know shit ;')

My next post is my last post. Don't cry. I have my reasons. My next post however is going to my >master piece< ;')

[yakuzacanons]

here’s a random one:

you did the boys and watching spooky movies w their s/o,

so how about the boys taking their s/o on a date to the movies? what types of movies fo they prefer, who’s getting what snacks, etc?

HELL yea, I'm a huge movie fan and I collect DVD so I lowkey spent time going through my collection wondering which ones the boys would watch lol. Each entry in this list is on the shorter side but I tried to include as many of the lads as possible here, enjoy!

Kiryu Kazuma

Not a big fan of movie dates as he prefers actual one-on-one time and interactions but does enjoy going to see a movie occassionally in a serious relationship. Likes action movies for the most part, partial to samurai dramas as well.

Majima Goro

Whatever you do, do not take his ass to the theater cuz he will not shut up during the movie. Even if he begs, do not give in, just make him watch the movie at home. Popcorn fiend, can eat an entire large bucket in one sitting. Will watch anything but he HAS to be entertained, that's the one rule.

Saejima Taiga

Thinks a movie and dinner date is cute as he can talk about the movie after. Almost never gets snacks at the theater but will buy some to share if you really want some. He likes westerns or samurai flicks. Romances make him cry sometimes.

Akiyama Shun

Secretly a rom-com enjoyer. Will hold your hand during the movie. Not big on snacks but almost always buys a drink of some kind. Romance movies and dramas are good choices for him. Likes anything with pretty cinematography and pretty music.

Tanimura Masayoshi

Fond of animated movies, both domestic and foreign. Prefers TV shows over movies since they're easier to get into on his days off work. Actually doesn't like buddy cop movies, finds them annoying or innaccurate. Serious crime dramas are okay but be warned he will have a lot of comments afterwards. ALSO he sneaks snacks into theaters. Most theaters never carry what he wants anyways.

Nishikiyama Akira

Likes a good movie date on occassion, but only if there's something both of you really want to see. Buys snacks to share, totally holds the popcorn bucket in his lap so you have to reach over to get some. His movie taste is kind of all over the place; one week he'll want to see a musical and next week he'll want to see an action movie.

Ryuji Goda

Not super into movie dates because he's usually super busy and he tends to fall asleep in them a LOT. He prefers dates that have the two of you doing something together, not just sitting in a dark room. He WILL however chow down on some snacks. You do have to stop him from going overboard on the popcorn butter...

Daigo Dojima

Same boat as Ryuji for similar reasons, although he'll gladly watch a movie at home with you as an indoor date, especially if it's bad weather out. Prefers oldies and classics; think Seven Samurai, Casablanca, etc. Watches them to try to get an understanding of what makes them so important, as he finds that aspect most interesting. Not snobby about it though; if he doesn't get it, he'll straight up be like "... THAT'S the movie people keep raving about?!"

Mine Yoshitaka

Sick horny bastard is into a movie date in the idea that you are in a dark room with him, teehee. He's not ALWAYS like that but he will try to get it on during a movie with you at least once. If he's actually going to watch the movie, it's crime thrillers for him. Loves a good, brooding atmosphere.

Tatsuo Shinada

With how expensive tickets are these days, his ass cannot afford to go to the theater often so it's very much a special treat. He also sneaks in his own snacks... likes comedies and 80's movies the most.

Ichiban Kasuga

Bless his heart but he cannot stay awake in a movie theater for the life of him... it's just so comfy in there. At home he actually has a better chance of staying awake, somehow. But still, it's not the best option for him and he knows it. Most fond of superhero or action movies though.

Yu Nanba

Doesn't watch a lot of movies or keep up on what's trendy so you'll likely have to suggest a movie date. Watches some documentaries at home by himself though. Pretty open minded otherwise.

Adachi Koichi

Lots of comedies or action movies for Adachi. Enjoys movies pretty frequently and likes going out to see them with you. Snacks are a must if it's a blockbuster movie. That's the rule, he claims.

Tianyou Zhao

Down to see a movie now and then but he does kind of get fidgety if he's not fully entertained. Also sits funny in movie theater chairs. He's a little embarassed to admit it due to how stereotypical it sounds but he likes movies with lots of cool stunt work or martial arts. Things like The Raid or John Wick are fun for him.

Joon-Gi Han

Kind of a human trash can in that you can make him watch just about anything. Not super into popcorn but WILL eat a whole bag of candy by himself if you don't watch out. It's not that his sweettooth is even that bad; he just kind of does it absentmindedly. Never talks during movies, ever.

Osamu Kashiwagi

Likes arthouse and underground films; if it's something he's never heard of, he will want to try it just to see if it's interesting. Also likes to check out local filmmakers or festivals if he can make it. He would love for you to join him!

[kroosluvr]

"an inside look into shujin academy's famed 'royal trio'" fic notes

link to the fic / link to tumblr post / link to tumblr ART!! post

this is going to be LONGGGG just all of my rambles/easter eggs(??) AND ETC. Not mandatory reading i kinda just want to write this for me to refer back to in like a few years or whatever hehehe

it is def confusing that i called shujin tennis academy that instead of giving it a diff name but i wanted to be a little tongue-in-cheek

mishima is a wannabe sports reporter, but maya amano (+ yukino mayuzumi) r already established sports reporters @ coolest magazine! :3 small cameo(sorta) at the end

goro does not want mishima out of a job he just hates interviews. he knows he HAS to do them though, and generally he's only featured alongside akira or sumire or both bc otherwise he doesnt wanna do em. for reasons i will elaborate on in futchure fics or art

i wanted to keep the mishima-using-akira-(SORTA)-for-popularity that canon has bc i always thought that was funny!!! since akira is so popular everyone's gotta read mishima's articles for info abt him....

'Ran donuts around ‘em' -> donuts is slang for straight sets (winning 6-0 6-0). incidentally, i've heard 'donut' used mostly in the PNW area while 'bagel' is used more in PNE. could be wrong. source: californian and i played college tennis in boston

generally, akira is always first seed while goro is second seed. sometimes the ranking is a littleeee inexplicable but it usually turns out this way when theyre in the same tournament

in general i wanted to emphasize the weird codependency needy attached-at-the-hip but we also hate eachother sort of "teammates"/friends(???) relationship that you develop in competitive sports... so all the "romantic" gestures throughout the fic can kinda just be boiled down to that. like, in a Normal context, maybe it'd be considered romantic, but in a "im fucking fiending for my life on a tennis court" context then it's just tuesday

sumire IS a walking ITF (international tennis federation) handbook. for reasons i will elaborate on in futchure fic/art! but she takes tennis very VERY seriously. (goro also takes it VERY seriously and akira takes it seriously.)

goro lets sumire call him by his first name abt 3 months into training w her at the academy (with him and akira its like within the first match bc theyre already at eachothers throats LMAO) after her landslide victory! thats when he kinda acknowledges her as a teammate i guess? beforehand they were just hitting partners

anyway the idea of "teammate" in competitive, individual, professional tennis is very fun and interesting to me as u can tell. LMAO. and like "what makes a Friend" versus A Teammate in terms of pro athletics

goro gets embarrassed when akira lets sumire sleep in their room not because of the actual fact of her sleeping there but because he doesn't WANT her to see him with his guard down. she always sees him on the court, ready to conquer his opponents, top-notch quality tennis, etc so he's mortified that she saw him Like that (just woken up LOL) though ofc she doesnt think anythign of it bc shes just like yayyyy tennis yayyy

Yup whenever u see a ping pong table u gotta round up all ur tennis oomfs and duel it out (i suck at ping pong....)

sumire being hard on akira and goro's tennis is kinda peak to me LOL she takes this sport so serious

AKIRA MISHIMA FRIENDSHIP MEANS THE WORLD TO ME. aside i read a few akira x mishima fics lately so theyve been buzzing in my head... important ...

dats a real club that i played at... one of my fav tournaments even though i played at like 8:30am or smth and it sucked. but it was reallyyy pretty and quite a drive

sumire + kasumi one-sided rivalry drives me insane ESP in tennis au, they're literally in two different fucken universes when it comes to athletics yet sumire is still deathly intimidated by her

goro picking fights w akira and sumire YAYYYYYYYYYY <3 and sumire boiling "friendship" down to "we play tennis well together" is so peak. yeahhh angst

"why do you play tennis" / "do you love tennis" / "what do you like about tennis" r such difficult questions. i read up on some pro interviews and they hurt me physically broooo like... it seems like a rarely asked question and you get a lot of common answers but u also get stuff that just breaks ur heart

aside, this convo btwn goro and sumire is very accomplice violetcrow to me. they're complicit in their hatred and their violence and their self-destruction except its very very very self contained to a couple of lines on a hard court (and sometimes grass if we're feeling special.) they truly hunger for number 1!!!!

i really like this section LMAO its probably my favorite.

woahhh shido mention. wonder what thats abt. TO BE CONTINUED

usual jokercrow scare tactics. mating dance type situation (sumire is used to this and doesnt think anything of it) like i said its like stuff that'd be DEFINITELY romantic and flirty in a normal context but in sports when things are highly charged and emotional and you're neck to neck it's less so. (obviously it still kinda is but this is what i mean in that u could totally read this whole fic platonically all the way around if u wanted to)

"Sumire hadn’t responded to that. She had practice to get to, after all." yupppp why would sumire spend time on anything thats not tennis? shes not number 1 yet, so how can she afford to waste time? 8)

akira/mishima playing basketball at the end IMPORTANCE!! also had to include akira stealing shit obviously. BUT YEAH i think its so important that akira finally gathers the idea that like... woah.. my life extends beyond the tennis court.. i can have HOBBIES.. and FRIENDS.... and hes the first of the 3 to realize that. sumire takes ages and goro also does (but quicker than sumire.) and also callback to when mishima said he missed him!!

Q6. Do you love tennis? Haha. haha. haha. yeah mishima ur not asking that one. that's hell ur walking into

[val-of-the-north]

Wanted to pop in and just say thanks for all your hard work with lore posts! Elden Ring is such a tough game to get a grasp on, leaving so many things up to interpretation. But in the end, there are also things solidly backed by actual lore, and you do such a great job of referencing and adhering to that canon pretty objectively. We all have our biases when we read this info, which leads us into the realm of interpretation. But when posters like you go to lengths to outline canon lore with screencaps and images to back your interpretations up, it's not just helping me see how you reached a conclusion but also laying the info out clearly so I can decide if I agree with that conclusion.

There's a lot of info that gets missed or plain old ignored in favor of either villifying/woobifying characters depending on what people think of them. And then sometimes people make these huge leaps from A to B that are just mystifying and seem to be purely based on "this sounds good to me so it must be right". It's refreshing to see someone trying hard to just present the facts and go from there, without these leaps of faith and desire to change the characters in one direction or another. It's easy to think you're reading things objectively while still clearly interpreting everything with a certain bias that will paint your favs/unfavs in a better/worse light, so your more neutral efforts are a breath of fresh air!

Hey! That's very sweet to find in my inbox... I am glad people appreciate the way I write my lore posts. I strive to be very objective when I tackle these topics, so I am very glad it's noticeable. I still have room for improvement, I will not lie, but I am surely getting better and better! The use of more images in my claims is something I started to pick up on recently, though believe it or not, I used to do it a looooong time ago too, for sillier stories lol. Now they are here to stay though, and they provide a very neat way to space out posts too.

I am honestly really flattered with your words ahahahah. Characters are probably the hardest ones to keep a purely objective lens on, as I do have my own personal opinions and headcanons on them as well as certain events that involve them… regardless, I try my absolute best to not rely too much on those and simply on things I have structured those headcanons after.

Of course, depending on what the lore I am discussing is about, I will be focusing and highlighting particular aspects over others, because I can't make an entire character study every time one is needed. Things would get really bloated and not as understandable really fast! I also avoid fandom tropes like the plague unless I am purposefully making a meme lol. I do dislike when meme/flanderized versions of characters end up popping up in genuine lore analysis (like "absolutely worthless fool" Godrick and "completely irredeemable fiend" Miquella, but there are many more)

To conclude... thank you so much for this! It was certainly a breath of fresh air that I needed too eheh... but I guess since we are talking about lore posts, I could tease that the next thing I wanna tackle has to do with the soul and body in Elden Ring! It's a topic that has fascinated me for some time, and the DLC actually helped me piece together some stuff I had missed from base game! I will try to make it as good as it can possibly be!

[notmyprey]

Have you told us anything about your character Jay yet?

Im going to assume you're talking about the sea dragon, seeing thats the only one I specified their name to be Jay. (I have a bad memory when it comes to names, so normally, I default to the names Jay and Lilly for my oc's)

Ive not talked too much abt them, but I can definitely give some more info!! (After the cut)

2 things to remember:

The world they live in does have magic.

The thing is, is that magic normally comes in the form of enchanted objects and is rarely able to be used directly by a creature.

To start basic info:

Jay is a sea dragon who does possess a special illusion magic that allows them to not only show visual illustrations but also audible and sensory. That means that they are effectively able to create a human illusion version of themselves that can interact normally with the world. That illusion can allow Jay to see through the illusions eyes, but it does not allow them to feel what its feeling. They also are not able to simultaneously move in their normal form and their illusion form.

Also, due specifically to their species, they can control if they have stomach acid or not.

Background about the world:

Humans were forced to live in underwater dome like places due to the lack of land to live on. The domes are just a little air bubble that's held together with magic.

Storyline:

Jay met their friends because their now friend Dave, who had inherited a sub from his late dad (ooo foreshadowing, is the dead dad important lol?), gathered a bunch of his friends to all go kinda "monster hunting," aka trying to find new sea creatures. The problem is that none of them know shit about sea creatures. That's where Jay comes in. Jay may not know the names of the creatures, but they will tell you whatever you need to know about it besides that. Jay ends up finding them through a little flier that the group posted asking for assistance in identifying sea creatures.

Eventually, Jay gets close to the group and eventually becomes really good friends with all of em.

To get food while also helping their friends, Jay keeps their mouth open at the entrance to their home so that fish get caught so they had an easy meal.

One day, while out exploring, Jay realized a little too late that they were horriblely close to where their home is. (They didn't notice cause in their normal form they are absoluntly fricking ginormous, and the landmarks they see at their normal size are harder to see when tiny) they are not able to keep up the illusion and move their physical body at the same time, so ofc they try to stear their friend away, but being curious little shits they keep going anyway.

They find the entrance to Jays home and end up going a decent way down Jays throat before Jay just opts to drop their illusion.

Jay coughes to push their friends out of their throat and slinks away from their friends and back into their home.

After gaining their footing again, the friends are like, where tf did Jay go??? It's an enclosed sub??? Huh??? They end up following the tunnel where "the strange creature," aka Jay, went.

They get into this really big ass cave with light flowing in from many small holes in the roof, allowing sunlight in. They then see a poor sobbing Jay, just absolutely devastated, believing their friends hate them and are afraid of them now.

Their fiends dont know its Jay, and they excitedly start to chatter among themselves and grab their cameras.

Jay hears the noise and move to look at it, and upon seeing its their friends the press themselves as far against the wall as they can. Jays friends, however, freeze, unsure how to know if this new creature is friendly.

Still trembling, Jay quietly apologies, tears starting to fall from their eyes again.

Finally, at hearing Jay speak, their friends finally figure out its them and go to comfort them.

A couple of "Filler Episodes" Lol:

1. The group is exploring (after knowing Jay is not human), and they run into a large creature. Jay tries to fight off the creature, but it is difficult since they also have to protect their friends. After the other creature almost hurts the submarine Jay's friends were in, they decide 'fuck it' and just swallow their friends, sub and all.

2. Jays friends go on a mini field trip down Jays throat and to their stomach.

3. Jay has not been able to taste most food since its such a small amount that their tastebuds dont detect it. Once Jays friends find that out, they set out to buy a heck ton of stuff so Jay can taste some good food. They end up making enough soup to fill a 2 story house to the brim, and fortunately, it was enough for Jay to get one bite of soup.

[shohokubasket]

Mitsui/Kogure Postype Fics

In case there are any mitsugure/mitko shipper fans out there and curious about some of the fanfiction that is out there, I am posting a few of the fanfics from Postype (a Korean blogging site, often used for fanfiction and fanart) that I've really liked!

For all of these fics posted here you can view them for free and don't need to set-up an account 😄 (adult-rated fics and fics with payments require an account to view )

I'll start with just a couple, and will add more if anyone is interested 👀

Re: Translation

Full disclosure I do not know/speak Korean, so I often just start reading these just with Google Translate and I'm able to get the gist of everything! I also recommend using Deepl and Papago for a little more context/nuance, if you'd like and/or if you have time for that lol.

Re: Names

Since these are Korean authors, about 90% of the time the characters' Korean localized names are used (Kogure Kiminobu = Kwon Junho, Mitsui Hisashi = Jung Daeman*).

*The machine translations will translate some of the Korean names to a literal meaning-so "Chisoo" (Akagi) will translate as "Dimensions", "Baekho" (Sakuragi) will sometimes translate as "White Tiger", etc. This is that case here where Daeman will translate to Taiwan (a literal meaning) pretty much everytime. If I remember correctly I think Korean fans have noted that it's kind of an older ("very 1980s") name.

Links to the fic are in the title (all the "tags" are what I would subjectively tag the fics and not what the authors tagged, just FYI)

My Personal Favorites 🥰

해나미 국수 (Toshikoshi Soba)

Author: Spockkie

"Junho, what about you?" "...Huh?" "If the world were to end tomorrow, what would you want to do?"

Tags: 1990s/ Adult Room mates/ Confession / New Years Eve

손가락 (Finger) [Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3]

Author: 날치

Junho recalled the face that came out to see him off at the gym door just a few hours ago. The figure standing hesitantly as if it had something to say. The hand repeatedly opened and folded his palm as if he was going to jump right in and carry his bag. When he remembered his face with his lips twitching with an expression as if he was about to say something, a smile came naturally.

Tags: Canon AU / Kwon (Kogure) Family OCs / Hospitals / Illness/ Angst

Cute Fluff 🌼

충전 완료 (Charging Complete)

Author: apollo

They say that when you get married, you're newlyweds for up to 10 years. We've been together for more than 10 years, so why do we feel like newlyweds now?

Tags: Medical Doctor (Hospitalist)! Junho / Recently Retired Basketball Player! Daeman / 30s

용기있는 자가 권준호를 차지한다 (A courageous person takes out Kwon Junho)

Author: jet

True courage is not about stepping forward at any time, but being able to step forward when faced with a situation that requires courage. Then shouldn't I, Jung Daeman, be courageous here? For Kwon Junho, who seems to be in trouble?

Tags: Canon AU / High School / Not Together

Angst

If you like Wattpad-esque, fan-culture centered fics, these are for you! 🤭

오타쿠는 억울해 (Otaku's Are Unfair)

Author: 날치

“What number is our room?” “Room 1405.” “…Kwon Jun-ho, did you rent that room on purpose?”

Tags: OC POV / Kpop Idol! Junho / Pro Basketball Player! Daeman / Modern AU / Social Media (Twitter)

내가 좋애 (My Favorite Person/My "Bias")

Author: 농놀하는 기나긴겨울

Besides, basketball? A few years ago, she didn't even know the rules of basketball. Now, however, she has become a strong fan of basketball, where you can recite the rules of basketball, when to when the season will be, what year the game was, and what kind of great game it is, and pay half a dozen times for all-star ticketing. Once again, her favorite favorite was never Jung Daeman. But why did she become a basketball fiend? It was because her favorite actor, Kwon Junho, was a fan of Jung Daeman.

Tags: OC POV/ Actor!Junho / Pro Basketball Player!Daeman / Modern AU / Humor

*BONUS* Seongji (Moroboshi) => Junho (Kogure) => Daeman (Mitsui) 👀

이렇게 될 거면 (If It's Going to Be Like This)

Author: 농놀하는 기나긴겨울

"Anyway, that's great jumping ability. I've seen it before, but your reflexes are really excellent." The compliments he gave me with his gentle face were extremely sweet. Have the Buksan guys received this kind of praise? Suddenly, that thought passed by for a moment. While I was thinking about that, Kwon Junho approached me smiling. "Ma Seongji, I heard you also joined this school, but I didn't know we would meet like this"

Tags: Unrequited Love / University AU / Modern AU