#// idk thinking of this today how he tries to live normally
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b0kksu · 9 months ago
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Hot take: Gojo who actively dated after the worse moments of his life is heartwarming. He still took a chance regardless of the sentimentality that was shattered, the desire to be close to those around him, it's just really cute to think deep down he held normal yearning like everyone else. So much of the time it is emphasized he is the greatest, the strongest, it's easy to forget he really was just a 28 year old man.
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f1fantasys · 3 months ago
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uh this is so random idk if you would write this but i have an idea so you are Lando’s roommate. one day you came home early and you heard a girl moaning from his room and immediately feel jealous but you tried to brush it off. then as the voice is getting more intense eventually you lean beside his door and can’t help to start touching yourself. you didn’t realized that you moaned too loud that makes Lando opened the door. he is shocked ofc but then start teasing you until you pushed him away because you respect his girlfriend. and it turns out… he just watching videos so no girlfriend or anything. later he decided to help you and even makes you squirt then ended up fucking you against the wall
Hi anon, i love this! Hope you enjoy.
Caught
Warnings - heavy smut, porn, kissing, p in v sex, oral f! receiving, fingering, swearing, squirting.
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You moved to Monaco a few weeks ago, being a Sky presenter, meaning you always had things to film and create with drivers and teams, so naturally, it made sense to live closer to everyones' base.
You had an amazing relationship with all the drivers, and were close to a few of them as well. Of course there had to be one, who'd caught your eyes on the first day of work 3 years ago.
Lando.
You wouldn't particularly say you were as close with him as you were with Charles and Carlos, but whenever you were together there was an undeniable sexual tension. Though you both would always brush it off and act like nothing was wrong.
Things were pretty normal between the pair of you until you'd arrived in Monaco, with your landlord telling you the apartment you were supposed to rent wasn't available anymore.
Long story short, Lando offered you a place to stay for as long as you needed, and you don't know how, or why, but you accepted.
So here you were two weeks later, coming home at an ungodly hour because your meeting at work ran over.
Lando's probably sleeping, you thought to yourself as it was already 12.35am when you checked the time, choosing not to make something to eat in fear of disturbing him at this time of the night.
As you walked quietly to your room, which was next to his, you heard something which froze your body still.
At first you thought your ears were deceiving you. It surely couldn't have been.
But as you willed your body to walk closer to Lando's room, you were done for.
It was moaning. Loud, sexy, goosebumps-raising moaning. There was a girl, and a guy, whom could have only been Lando.
To be honest, you had thought he'd bring random girls home much sooner than today. But still, the thought of him literally fucking a girl on the other side of the wall had your body quivering. In shock and need.
You knew you should retreat to your room, put your headphones on, and block out all of the noise. But once again, your body deceived you, wetness already pooling at your core.
You could hear them both panting through harsh breaths, moaning as if their life depended on it, and swearing as though they didn't care if the neighbors heard them, let alone you.
Somewhere at the back of your heart, it hurt, to think it was Lando with another girl, not you, but in the moment, all you could think about was how his naked body would slide against yours. You imagined his girth to be thick and long, just big enough to fit perfectly, having your walls clench around him as he moved in and out of you. You thought about how it would feel to have his lips on yours, roughly kissing you while slipping his tongue into your mouth, and about how he would pinch your nipples between his fingers before sucking on him, having you a moaning mess underneath him.
Without really realizing what you were doing, you found your hand slide into your joggers and slip past your panties, running your fingers through your folds as you collected you wet and sticky juices.
The noises coming from Lando's room were obscene to say the least. Man must know what he's doing, you thought, as you imagined it was his fingers that were dancing on your folds.
You bit your lip, trying to suppress your own moans as you pushed two fingers through your core, shutting your eyes, mind trained on listening to your surroundings.
You could hear from the girls' whimpers that she was close, saying incoherent words through gritted teeth, and when she finally hit her high, Lando must have emptied himself in her by the sounds he was making, moaning into the oblivion.
Lando's moan alone had sent you spiraling, gushing cum all over your fingers as you let out your own soft whimpers and moans, not realizing that you were actually louder than you thought.
And just as your mind caught up with just how loud you were, Lando's room door suddenly flew open, the both of you staring at each other in shock.
He was stood there wearing nothing but his boxers, hair disheveled and cheek flushed.
You quickly removed your hand form your joggers, holding both your arms behind your back as if you were hiding something, as you looked at him not knowing how to get yourself out of this situation. You wanted the ground to swallow you up.
You didn't miss how Lando's eyes darkened when you did that, and with the way your body was still riding down from the high, you held in soft quivers, opening your mouth a few times to say something though nothing came out.
''I-I, um, I-'' you started but Lando cut you off.
''What are you doing?'' he asked, not sounding one but annoyed or confrontational, but rather teasingly.
You gulped, 'nothing'' you lied, knowing your face would give you away with how hot your cheeks felt.
He smirked, let out a small chuckle. ''Enjoyed that, didn't you?'' he teased again.
''I-, fuck, I didn't mean to eavesdrop'' you mumbled shyly.
He didn't say anything back, just nodded his head with a full on boyish grin.
''I'm gonna go, let you get back to your girl'' you softly said, turning to the direction of your room.
''My-, what? My what?'' Lando asked, clear confusion on his face.
You raised your brow. ''I'll let you get back to your girl'' you said, pointing in the direction of his room, quickly hiding your hand again because your fingers were still glistening with your cum.
Finally it clicked in him. Did you really think he had a girl in there? he thought to himself. And fuck, seeing your wet fingers had him growing hard.
He chuckled again, smirking, before he grabbed your hand and pulled you into his room, shutting the door behind you and placing his hands on both sides of your face, staring into your soul.
You both stayed silent, searching each others face until soft moans filled your ears again. Your eyes grew with shock when you looked past Lando and saw his laptop on the bed, facing you, with two people fucking each other taking up the screen.
Suddenly it dawned on you. He was watching porn, not fucking anyone.
You took a deep breath again when you looked back at Lando. His gaze stern and determined. And then he did the unimaginable. He took you hand in his and brought your fingers up to his mouth, taking them in and sucking harshly on them, swallowing all your juices.
All you could do was watch with your mouth agape, pussy clenching around nothing, desperate to feel him down there.
''It wasn't me babygirl. But it can be if you want it to'' he whispered.
Your breath hitched as his hands landed on your waist and started roaming your body. Instinctively, you wrapped your hands around his neck, and in no time he leaned down to crash his lips to yours.
It was a feverish kiss. Hard and deep but so natural as if you'd kissed a thousand times before. Your mind went back to a few minutes ago to when you were standing outside his closed door, imagining what his lips felt like, and now you could confirm it was a hundred times better, a hundred times sexier, as he slid his tongue into your mouth and memorized every inch of it.
Your hands ran through his hair multiple times before lowering down to roam his back and taunt core muscles, instantly feeling your self aroused again at how hard his muscles were to the touch. It was something you found extremely sexy.
As Lando's own hands continued to dance around your body, he let one slip through your joggers, landing instantly on your core which had you jumping in his hold.
''Gonna take care of you baby'' he said before leaving wet kisses along your neck as his calloused fingers twirled their way through your slick folds.
You moaned out as he began to nip and bite at your neck, no coherent words forming in your mind. All you knew was how good he felt.
''So wet for me, yeah?'' he asked.
''Uh huh'' you replied, shutting your eyes as he let a finger push through you entrance.
You held your breath as he pumped it in and out with ease because of how wet you were.
''Fucking hell, you're so tight'' he said through gritted teeth, using his other hand to get past your tshirt and massage your boobs.
''Been a while'' you said, though immediately regretted it because he did not need to know that.
Suddenly he pulled back and looked at you. ''No'' he states.
''Yes'' you say back.
''How long?''
Does it matter? you thought to yourself.
''I don't know, like 3 month'' you said, not knowing how he would respond.
''Fuck'' he said, before sending you a wink.
''Gonna destroy you'' he said, mumbling it more to himself.
He quickly pulled your tshirt off of you before ripping your bra off, licking his lips at the sight of your perky boobs, nipples already stiff from the cool air.
He took way too long staring at them, and only when you whined did he snap out of his trance and sink down on on his knees, pulling your joggers down at the same time.
You mentally thanked yourself for shaving this morning as you looked down to see Lando licking his lips, before leaning down and licking a strip up your cunt.
You instinctively tried to close you legs around his head through he held them open with his strong hands, and you could do nothing but let your own hands latch onto his precious hair and pull it at.
He was devouring your pussy. Licking, sucking, soothing, nipping, doing everything possible to make you feel every emotion.
''Fuck Lando'' you hissed as he quickly found your clit, biting at it harshly before pulling back and blowing some cool air on it.
He returned his fingers and slid two in, hitching your breath in the process as he let his mouth back on as well, showing you no mercy with a relentless pace.
All you could do was let out a series of moans and bated breaths as you held onto him for dear life, feeling the warmth build up in your stomach.
''Gonna cum Lan'' you said.
He pulled back for a second, ''let me taste you again'' he said, before returning to his activities.
In no time your body was shuddering above hi, your orgasm letting you reach the best high as you gushed your fluids all over his face and fingers.
Lando groaned to himself when he go the first taste of you. Warm and milky with a salty aftertaste that had him grow extremely hard with the mix of hearing and feeling you.
He finally pulled back for a few seconds, letting your body calm down.
He looked at you with soft eyes. ''So fucking delicious baby'' he murmured.
Before you could even respond he was spreading your legs apart again, as far as he could as he ran his tongue through your fold again. Then he used to fingers to pry your pussy open, leaning forward and thrusting his tongue in and out of your core.
Once again you pulled at his hair, body like jelly though he was strong enough to hold you in position as his tongue did wonders to you.
''Hmm, not gonna last long, fuck, Lando please'' you begged.
Suddenly his tongue was being replaced with his fingers again, three this time, which stretched you out, making you gasp for air.
You could feel your next orgasm building up, and just when Lando curled his fingers to hit your g-spot, your body was in a state of bliss. You didn't even know that your cunt was squirting out juices, drenching Lando's face as he smiled wickedly at the mess he's made of you.
''I-fuck Lando!'' you all but screamed, watching as he started licking at every place you gushed over.
You tried to get out of his hold so you could bolt to you room, so embarrassed that you made such a mess on him. ''Lando, let me -I''m so sorry, fuck'' you mumbled.
But he stopped you in your tracks.
''Don't. That was so fucking amazing, fuck I''m so hard'' he said, quickly standing up again and roughly pulling you into a heated kiss, while still holding your body up. You were sure you'd be on the floor by now if he wasn't.
As his face was pressed your yours you could feel the slickness and stickiness rubbing off on to you as he continued to roughly make out with you, sucking on your tongue, probably drawing blood with how intense it was.
When Lando' hands reached down and massaged your ass, giving you a few gentle slaps, you snaked your own hand down and slipped through his joggers, taking his achingly thick girth and pumping him a few times.
When you felt how big he was, you were internally screaming. How the hell is he gonna fit, you thought.
He must have sensed your hesitation because without realizing, your movements with your hands and mouth were faltering.
''Gonna be ok baby, we'll make it work'' he said, pulling back and giving you reassuring eyes.
You just nodded your head and pulled him flush against you again, working on removing his boxers completely.
Once that was done, Lando took himself in his hands and raan his angry dick through your folds multiple times before groaning and pulling back.
''Shit'' he said.
You gave him a confused look, suddenly feeling exposed because why else would he pull away if this was something he didn't want?
''Don't have a fucking condom'' he sighed.
You let out a breath and chuckled. ''Top right drawer of my dresser'' you said confidently.
Lando was quick to shoot out of his room and not a minute later he was walking back in, pumping himself as he ripped the condom wrapper open with his teeth before sliding it on himself. It was tight, anyone would be able to see that with how bigger than average he was. But for now, it would do the job, hopefully.
You watched on in anticipation, really took you time to gawk him up and down and you couldn't help but feel the blood rushing down to your core. He was so fucking hot, and right now you wanted him to ruin you. Use you as he pleased, because god you were putty in his hands right now.
Once he was done putting the condom on, he looked at you and gave you a cheeky smile, as if he was proud of his efforts.
That lasted all but a few seconds because the smile was quickly replaced by a dark lust in his eyes.
As eager as you were to finally have him in ways you'd only dreamed about until now, there was still a part of you that was nervous as hell because, one, he was thick, very thick, and two, this would change everything, and you only hoped it would be for the better.
Lando cupped your face again and gave your forehead a quick peck, as if he could see the wheels turning in your mind.
''Baby'' he whispered, as he lined his dick up at your entrance.
You nodded, and he let himself slide in, all the way in with a single thrust.
You held your breath and shut your eyes, nails digging into his biceps as Lando left little pecks all over your shoulders.
The stretch was blood sore, but as he pulled out and thrust back in again, the pleasure started to take over the pain.
He was going slow, allowing your body to get used to the intrusion as he hiked one of your legs up to his hip and held it in place.
He continued at a slow pace for a few more thrusts before you told him it was okay to go faster.
Now, Lando was relentless, fucking into you continuously as all you did was bite you lower lip as hard as you good, whimpers and broken breaths leaving your mouth.
Lando himself was letting out moans, praising you through gritted teeth.
''Fuck y/n, so fucking tight but taking me so well. Shit. Never felt this good before. Fuck me you're incredible''
You won't lie. Hearing his praise you like that was turning you on even more, though it seemed impossible at this point. But just listening to his hoarse voice had your body trembling in his arms.
''Lando, gonna cum. Fuck'' you breathed out, moans getting louder by the second as he was burying himself deep inside of you.
''Do it'' he mumbled as he caught your left nipple between his teeth and bit down harshly at it.
''Fuck too much'' you squealed. You could feel him smile against you as he soothed his tongue over and blew on it to relieve it.
Lando snaked his hand down to your clit, he had barely touched it and you felt your orgasm over come you, your body shaking violently in his arms as you gushed warm sticky juice all over his cock, having him groaning at ''how fucking sexy'' you are.
He gave you no time to come down from you high, immediately pulling out and turning your body around so your back was to him.
You just about fumbled as you quickly reached your hand down and pulled the condom off, desperate to feel him. His eyes grew wide but all you did was send him a wink as you heard him mutter a few swear words to himself.
You grabbed his dick again and positioned it against you again, before Lando rammed himself into you, the new position having him go even deeper than he was before, making it feel a thousand times better without the condom.
''Fuck me, Lando, fuck'' you moaned, probably the most pornographic noises you'd ever made before.
''I am fucking you baby. And you're taking me so well. Never felt so fucking good before'' he said, nuzzling his nose into your neck.
The pace was raw, unfiltered, as if you were both starved of each other. Lando's hands were surely leaving purple marks on your hips how hard he was pressing down on you, and his cock was surely bruising your insides as he relentlessly thrust in and out of you until you were a moaning mess again, body shuddering in the wake of another orgasm ripping through you.
''Fuck, i'm gonna cum. Where?'' he impatiently asked.
''In me, fuck, please'' you begged.
Within seconds Lando emptied his milky load into you, ropes of it already leaking out and down your thigh as he slowly decreased his pace to ride you both through, both your bodies shaking and overstimulated, high of adrenaline.
Lando leaned forward onto you, squeezing you between his body and the door as your mind tried to catch up to what just happened.
His head was in your neck, and you could feel his curls sticky with sweat as his cool breath left goosebumps on your skin due to the chill of your own sweat.
Neither of you said anything for a while, just basking in each others bodies as you tried to catch your breath.
You could feel Lando softening inside of you as he started leaving wet kisses along your shoulders and back.
His hand found yours, and you both hissed as he slowly pulled out, turning your body back to face him.
He gave you a sheepish smile, cheeks flushed as you bit down on your bottom lip, not knowing what was gonna come next.
Lando tucked a strand of hair behind your ear as he leaned forward to kiss you gently.
''You're so fucking amazing y/n, and I've waited way too fucking long to do this''
''We...waited too long to that'' you said, emphasizing on the ''we''
Suddenly you saw Lando getting to his knees again, and as much as you couldn't wait fro more from him, you were fucking sore.
''Lan, too much'' you whispered, latching onto his hair.
''I know'' he said softly as he let his tongue run through your folds, collecting the mixture of cum before he got back up and pryed your mouth open.
You held your breath as he let the cum drip from his mouth down to yours before giving you a feverish, toe curling kiss, the both of you moaning at the taste of each other.
A few minutes later, and Lando, being the gentleman he is, cleaned you up and pulled you into his bed, your body curling at his side.
''So...goes without saying, but be my girlfriend? I mean, you're already living with me..and I've already made you squirt'' he smirked
You felt your cheeks flush, ''Ug Lando!'' you couldn't help but try to hide your face until he pulled your body to lay on top of his.
''And it was the hottest thing I've ever seen'' he said, smiling genuinely.
''Yes'' you said softly.
''Yeah?'' he asked, eyes growing wide and full of excitement.
''Yeah'' you said, leaning down to kiss him for the hundredth time today, feeling his hands on your ass giving you a few playful smacks.
Hope y’all enjoyed this! Please do leave comments and remember requests are always open xx
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beloveds-embrace · 2 months ago
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hi, this idea kind of comforts me but it makes you feel uncomfy just ignore this request.
but since you do poly 141, I was thinking of a fic where reader comes from a bad abusive family but she doesn't talk about it and thinks it's normal. and the 141 tries to get angry/frustrated with her because they are concerned for the fact she is fine with people treating her badly or not prioritising herself they come to realise it's just how she thinks. and they remind her that she now doesn't have to survive and fade into a background or is a burden and that she can live and be happy.
i know it sounds complicated and specific but I kinda have this really serene picture in my head that if that happens everything will fine AHAHA idk. but again if this idea doesn't correspond with your writing or feeling or comfortability please just ignore this. apologies if it made you feel uncomfortable.
hope you have/had a nice day or night!!♡♡
I hope you have a nice day/night as well!! And i hope you enjoy this! CW: past abuse, past emotional abuse and neglect
You met them first through a mutual friend, an unplanned introduction that turned into something you hadn’t quite expected: a tentative relationship, but one that had happiness blooming like the flowers and greenery you tend to. It was unconventional- a group of elite soldiers who spent most of their time between missions scattered across the world and a civilian- but when they returned, it felt like they brought your home with them.
You still didn’t understand why they liked having you around. You were just a florist who helped them with decorating their new house, or who listened when they needed a friendly ear. You didn’t ask for anything, and they were kind enough not to question it even if you'd seen their displeased little frowns and furrowed brows whenever you'd refuse.
But recently, you noticed them getting… concerned.
It was Soap who brought it up first, his frustration seeping into his usual easy smile.
It happened after you’d offered to run a series of errands, insisting they rest after a mission. As always, you tried to downplay your exhaustion, helping them settle in their home, making sure everything was clean and in order for them before you even considered sitting down.
Soap watched with a frown, noticing how you brushed off the heaviness in your movements and the bags under your eyes, doing your best to tend to them, such a sweet thing. But after you finished, he gently grabbed your arm.
“Dove, why do you do this?” he asked, voice softer than you’d ever heard it.
“Do what?” you replied, a little too quickly, trying to pull your arm back almost instinctively. Almost like a habit.
“Act like you don’t need anything. You haven’t even eaten today, and you’re lookin’ after us like we’re helpless. What about you, aye?”
You stared at him, unsure of what to say. You didn’t know how to explain that putting yourself last was just what you did. That it felt right, somehow, to stay in the background, to make sure everyone else was fine before even thinking about yourself. It was normal, no? It was how you were raised, and your parents only ever insisted that discipline was needed.
“Just… used to it, I guess?” you finally mumbled.
Soap’s brows drew together, but before he could say more, Gaz stepped in, giving you a gentle, worried look. So Johnny... wasn't the only one who thought so?
“It’s not right,” Gaz said, frustration simmering in his tone. “You’re allowed to put yourself first, you know?”
You shrugged, glancing away. Allowed. You hadn’t thought of it that way.
Price was the next to notice it, his observant eyes always catching the little things: how you’d flinch ever so slightly when they raised their voices, the way you stayed at the edges of conversations, nodding along but rarely chiming in. It had been the same when they'd met you, but he had assumed- hoped- it was merely you being naturally shy.
But this clearly went beyond that.
One night, as you were tidying up after dinner, John approached you, folding his arms across his chest. He stands close, but not too close.
“Why don’t you sit with us, love? Someone else can do the dishes. You barely let us help you cook or set the table either.” He says, his voice gentle, but with a hint of a command.
“I’m fine, John. I really don't mind.” You answered quickly, quietly. You couldn’t meet his eyes, a reflex you’d developed over years of keeping your head down.
He tilted his head, as if trying to see past the answer you’d given him. “No, my love,” he said softly, but with a firmness that made you pause. “I think you’re used to telling yourself that, but I don’t think you believe it.”
You froze, unsure how to respond, feeling something painful stir in your chest. The idea of asking for anything, for taking up space- of needing more than what little you had- seemed wrong. Like wanting was a burden in itself. But it is. It's what you've learnt and been taught.
John sighed, his eyes warm but sad. His hands raised to cup you face slowly, gently. “You’re not a burden, you know that, right?”
You gave him a small, shaky smile, one that didn’t quite reach your eyes. “Yeah.”
The next time, it was Ghost.
He was usually silent, lurking in the shadows, watching with that keen, unreadable gaze that only ever softened for you and them. But one evening, as you were dropping off supplies at their base, Ghost noticed you hurrying off after you’d finished. He easily caught up with you just outside, his hand gentle as it grasped your shoulder.
(Yet it still had you flinching.)
“You don’t have to go, birdie.” He murmured, voice soft but clear. You met his gaze, startled by the gentle concern in his eyes.
“You… don’t mind?” you asked, trying not to look too hopeful. You always worried your company might be too boring, unproductive. Unwanted.
Ghost shook his head. “If anything, we mind when you don’t stay,” he scoffed quietly. Then he sighs. “We’re worried, you know. About how you treat yourself, luvie. Like you don’t deserve anything more than the bare minimum.”
You swallowed hard, his words hitting deeper than you’d care to admit. He waited, patient, a pillar of quiet understanding.
“I just… it’s what I know,” you finally whispered, unable to look at him. “Growing up, I was never… important. And I don't have to be! I'm not demanding it, I promise-”
He was silent for a moment, and then he took in a deep breath that cuts your frantic mumbles off, as if finally understanding something he’d long suspected. “Well,” he said, his voice a low rumble, “you’re with us now, birde. You are important.”
Something warm spread in your chest, something unfamiliar yet comforting. You managed a nod, finding a small sliver of strength in his words, and a little smile forms on your face- leaning into Ghost's knuckles so lightly caressing your cheek.
After those days, things began to change more and more. For the better.
Kyle would check in with you every day, insisting you take breaks with him, sharing laughs over simple things. Soap began inviting you to meals, not taking no for an answer, piling food on your plate until you couldn’t help but indulge. Those two especially adored taking you out to sample new cuisines, delighting in getting you to be more open with your expressions and reactions.
John and Simon would go on walks with you, listening to the little stories you’d been hesitant to share, showing you that your presence mattered to them as much as theirs did to you. And slowly, day by day, they chipped away at the walls you’d built around yourself. Showed you that what your family raised to be wasn't right, was cruel to you.
One evening, as you sat on the couch in the common room, leaning against Johnny's shoulder, Kyle leaned over, a gentle smile on his face.
“You know, love, you don’t have to survive anymore,” he said softly, meeting your gaze with a warmth that made your heart ache. “We want you here because you make us happy. Just as you are.”
The words felt foreign, but you let them settle over you, warm and safe. Kyle gave your hand a gentle squeeze, reassuring, a silent reminder that you didn’t need to hide.
“We’re here to take care of each other,” Soap murmured, his arm wrapping around your shoulders, “and that means you too, aye?”
You gave them a tentative smile, feeling that familiar ache soften just a little.
Simon, sitting nearby, nodded in silent agreement, and John leaned back in his chair, giving you a small, proud smile. “You’re one of us, love,” John said quietly, his voice steady. “And as long as you’re here, you’re part of this family. We won't just let you fade into the background. That isn't fair to a dove like you.”
And looking at them now, at the love and gentleness they held for you, it wasn't hard to believe their words.
Maybe, just maybe, you’d finally found a place where you belonged.
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sp6ncers · 7 days ago
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sunday morning — s reid
summary: reader is struggling on the anniversary of her trauma and spencer tries to comfort her.
spencer reid x fem! reader. angst, fluff? spencer's pov, 2nd person.
song: sunday morning by ethel cain
warnings/content: depression, trauma/ptsd, mentions of abuse & sexual assault (past), self deprecating talk from reader, hurt/comfort, established relationship, pet names (baby, sweetheart, sweet girl, angel), non-sexual showering together, allusions to self harm but not really
wc: ~ 2.8k
author's note : hai !! this is my first tumblr fic so pls bare with me while i figure out how everything on this app works 😭 this is a very self indulgent & angsty fic because idk i just wanted to write it to make me feel better about some stuff that happened to me lolol anyway i hope u enjoy & any feedback is appreciated !!! 💞
Spencer is drinking coffee at the kitchen table, a book settled in his hands, when you drag yourself out of the bedroom. His gaze flits away from the book, falling onto your dishevelled form. You don't even look up at him, your eyes staying low as you trudge towards the bathroom, feet dragging on the floor.
His eyebrows furrow in concern, his worried gaze following your journey until the door shuts. The faint click of the lock sounds in the otherwise quiet apartment. Sliding a bookmark into place, Spencer closes his book and sets it down on the table.
He tries to think logically. Maybe you're just tired. That's a simple, normal explanation. It's not like you'd even done anything to show that something is wrong — yet his gut still tells him that. He's a profiler, after all. He's trained to read body language. And the way you had held yourself as you had passed through was a clear sign of distress.
After a few minutes, you emerge from the bathroom, your eyes somehow even more tired than before. Again, you don't look at him, and his concern only grows.
"Good morning, angel," Spencer says gently, his voice soft and almost cautious.
He gets a barely audible hum of acknowledgment and nothing more as you disappear back into the bedroom, shoulders slumped.
Worry gnaws on his bones with its sharp teeth, making his legs feel weak as he stands up and crosses the apartment to the bedroom. His knuckles tap gently against the slightly open door as he slowly pushes it wider. His eyes fall on your form, curled up small beneath the covers which rise and fall in time with your slow breathing.
Quietly, his voice barely above a whisper, he says your name. But you don't answer.
Spencer knows your struggle with depression; he's known since the third date the two of you went on. He has always been there for you, good days and bad, and he has always been patient and gentle and understanding. He knows what it's like to be stuck in your own mind, bad thoughts like a cage around you. But he's never seen you like this before.
In the time that you have been together — and the two months living with each other — he's witnessed your mental health worsen and become better. He's been by your side when you've had breakdowns and couldn't even leave your apartment. He's researched every possible way to help you feel better. He's done all he could to help you.
But what he's never seen is you so deeply distressed that you can't even say hi to him. Every morning, no matter what, you say hi, or good morning, or ask how he slept. But not today. It worries him, a deep pit forming in his stomach and swallowing him whole.
Carefully, he makes his way over to the bed and sits on the edge. The dip of the mattress beneath his weight makes you look up. He notices the redness in your eyes and the exhaustion on your face. Had you slept at all last night?
"Hey," Spencer says quietly, shifting to sit beside you. "Are you feeling okay?"
You're quiet for a few moments, and he wonders if you just don't feel like speaking today. Of course, that would be fine with him, but he'd much prefer to hear your voice.
"I'm okay," you respond, but the crack in your voice tells him otherwise.
"You sure?" he asks gently. He knows that if he asks if you're sure, you'll tell him you're not really okay. That's how it always goes. He doesn't mind it, but he always wishes you'd just tell him the first time he asks.
The room falls quiet as you push yourself into a sitting position, your back against the headboard. His eyes trace over your face and body language, taking note of the way you wrap your arms around yourself in an almost protective way. Your eyes glisten with unshed tears, red-rimmed, the dark bags beneath them prominent. The soft light filtering through the curtains shines against your damp cheeks; it would be beautiful if you weren't so upset. His heart aches, hating how utterly sad and distressed you look. He wants to take away all your pain and bury it in himself rather than in you. He would so much rather be the one suffering with whatever is bothering you than have to see you like this.
Your bottom lip quivers as you manage to force out the word, "No."
Eyes softening, he watches as you sniffle and bring your hands to your face, pressing your palms into your eyes. "What's wrong, baby? Did something happen?" he asks softly. "Or is it just a bad day today?"
You shake your head, wiping your hands down your face as tears begin to fall once again. You take a deep, shaky breath before speaking, your body shuddering as you let the breath out. "No— no, it... it, um..."
You can't seem to put your thoughts into words, your sentences fragmented and unsure. Spencer reaches out a gentle hand, resting it on your shoulder to test the waters. When you don't shy away from his touch, he wraps an arm around you, pulling you close as his other hand comes up to your hair.
"It's okay, sweetheart. Take your time."
Another deep breath, your body trembling in his embrace as you turn to bury your face against him. He doesn't mind that your tears are soaking through his shirt. He just wants to make you feel better.
"It's..." You don't finish your sentence, instead letting out a quiet sob that breaks Spencer's heart.
Of course, he's seen you cry before. But it's never been this bad. He hates the feelings that build within him, the feeling of helplessness, of being unable to do anything to make you feel better. His mind feels fuzzy, but he knows that's nothing compared to what you must be feeling. He can't even imagine what's going on inside your head right now. Instead of speaking, instead of rushing you to open up, he simply holds you tighter, rubbing your back in what he hopes is a soothing motion.
The way your body shudders against him with each shaky breath and gasping sob makes him feel sick. He wishes there was something he could do to make you feel better, but all he can think of is to just hold you close.
"I— I'm sorry," you whisper, your voice shaky and breathless.
His eyebrows furrow at your apology. Shaking his head, Spencer holds you tighter. "Why are you sorry?"
He feels the movement of your shrug as you bury yourself further against him. "I'm being stupid," you mumble, your words followed by another pained sob, the sound muffled against him.
"You're not being stupid, angel. Not at all," he assures you. "Whatever is making you feel like this isn't stupid. If it's upsetting you this much, it is not stupid, okay?"
A quiet sound, something akin to a whimper, escapes your lips as you bunch up his shirt in your fists. He knows you need something to ground you. He would let you rip his shirt to shreds if you needed to.
"I want to help you," Spencer continues softly, his hand rubbing slowly over your back. "I want to help you feel better, sweetheart. Can you tell me what's upsetting you, please?"
He doesn't mean to rush you — that's not something he would ever want to do. All he wants is to find out why you're feeling this way and what he can do to help. Seeing you like this, so hurt and broken, is destroying him. It's like a mould, creeping through his body and over each inch of him until his entire being aches.
You hesitate for a few moments, sniffling softly as you pull yourself away from where you had burrowed into his chest. Your hands are harsh as you wipe the tears from your face, fingers digging into your skin. Spencer gently takes your hands in his, pulling them away from your face to prevent you from hurting yourself.
"Hey, don't do that, please," he says gently, holding your hands in his lap and rubbing his thumb over your knuckles. "I'm right here, okay? You can take as long as you need, but I'd really like to know what has you feeling like this, baby."
The breath you take in is deep and shaky, your body trembling as you sniffle. He reaches up one of his hands, cupping your cheek and gently wiping away your tears. "I love you, my sweet girl. So much. You can tell me anything, okay?"
Nodding, you lean your face into his palm and take a shaky breath. He watches you carefully, his thumb tenderly stroking over your cheek to comfort you. He knows that what you need to say won't be easy, not at all, and he knows you need a few moments to prepare yourself to say it. He waits quietly, patiently, listening to the shuddering breaths you take.
After a few moments, you finally speak. "Two years ago... I, um..."
You speak hesitantly, stumbling over your words as you try to get it out. Spencer's hand slips away from your face, trailing down your arm to hold your hand again. Giving your hand a reassuring squeeze, he stays silent to let you get this out.
"I was..." You trail off, swallowing nervously. After taking a deep breath, you wipe away your tears and attempt to continue. "I was in a relationship with a guy. He— he wasn't really, um, a good person."
The way you say it makes him nervous; his mind immediately goes to the worst possible places. He gives you another gentle squeeze, his other hand reaching up to carefully tuck your hair away from your damp, tearstained face. His touch is delicate and gentle, hoping he makes you feel better. You've barely even started explaining, but he feels his heart pounding and his throat growing tight with worry.
"We had been together for a— a few months, and... He'd, um, recently started getting kinda... I don't know. He— he'd started saying weird stuff and—"
You cut yourself off with a sniffle, blinking back more tears. Spencer can't imagine how hard this must be for you. His head is a mess, trapped somewhere between unfathomable worry and empathy for you, and anger at the fact that someone had hurt you so badly. He chews on his lip to stop himself from speaking as you brokenly explain what had happened on this day two years ago. His stomach twists, a nauseous feeling rising in his chest as you tell him how that man had violated your boundaries and ignored your protests to what he was doing. Each word is like a knife plunging into his chest, over and over and over. Each hurt little whimper as you recall the story breaks his heart further.
"He—" You sniffle again, blinking harshly as tears paint your skin. "I'm sorry," you mumble, wiping away your tears on your sleeve.
"Don't apologise," Spencer replies gently with a shake of his head as he gives your hand a squeeze. "Take your time, sweetheart."
Taking another trembling breath, you continue in a quiet, broken voice. "There were... there were bruises where h-he had grabbed me. It— it was like a reminder of what happened. I— I know that I should've... I should've ended things before it got that far, but I..." Your voice trails off. He knows what you mean. He's studied human behaviour enough to understand how abusive and manipulative relationships affect someone, making it difficult to leave.
"I just... I didn't know how. And— and I didn't really have anyone to— to go to," you murmur. "And I know... I know it's stupid to still be upset about it... But I just... I can still f-feel his hands on me, and— and I hate it. I— I can't get him off. Please get him off."
Your face crumples as you end your sentence with a sob, your shoulders shuddering. He carefully pulls you back into him, resting your head against his chest. One hand strokes your hair as the other securely wraps around you in the way he knows makes you feel better. His heart is in pieces, completely broken from what you'd told him. You haven't given him too much detail — he doesn't expect you to do that — but what you've said is enough for him to understand. He understands what happened is horrible, and awful, and sickening. He understands that you feel like you can't cleanse yourself from that awful man's touch. He understands that you might still be scared of your trust being broken again.
"It's okay," Spencer whispers, kissing the top of your head. "It isn't stupid to be upset. It's rational. It's normal. What happened to you was terrible, and I am so, so sorry you had to go through that, angel. I hope you know that it wasn't your fault. At all. And I promise you — I promise — you are safe with me."
You sniffle softly, and he can tell you're trying to control your shaky breathing. He continues to gently stroke your hair as his thumb rubs small circles on your waist through the fabric of your sweater. You shift against him, your fist rubbing at your eye.
"I'll never let anything like that happen to you ever again. I promise," he tells you softly, his voice sincere. He really hopes you know that he would never even think of doing that to you, but he understands that you might still be wary. "I love you more than anything."
It's quiet for a few minutes, the only sounds being your trembling breaths and occasional sniffles. He continues to hold you against him, trying to bring you comfort. He's glad you told him, and he hopes that you feel better now that you have, at least a little bit. His mind is a mess of emotions, but right now he just wants to focus on helping you calm down. He can deal with his own thoughts once he knows that you're okay. Sure, that isn't exactly a healthy way to deal with things, but he doesn't know what else there is to do.
"Everything hurts," you murmur, your voice muffled against him. He's not exactly sure what you mean, whether you're physically in pain or if it's just emotional turmoil, but either way, he wants to help.
"Do you want me to run you a shower?" he asks quietly. "Or get you a drink? Breakfast?"
"Shower," you whisper, your voice slightly hoarse from crying. "Please."
"Of course. Stay here."
Spencer carefully removes his arms from around you, his lips ghosting over your forehead in a soft kiss as he stands up. Heading into the bathroom, he turns on the shower and heats it up to the temperature he knows you like. After turning on the radiator and setting a towel on top to warm up, he walks back into the bedroom to find you looking much more calm than before. Giving you a gentle smile, he takes your hand and helps you up off the bed, guiding you into the bathroom.
Not wanting to overstep or make you uncomfortable, he asks, "Do you want me to stay?"
"Please," you respond softly with a nod.
"Okay," he replies, his voice barely above a whisper. "Should I come in with you, or—"
You give another nod in response before he can even finish the question. Slowly, tenderly, he helps you undress, taking note of the reddish marks on your skin. He assumes they're from where you showered yesterday and desperately tried to cleanse yourself of your ex's touch, your hands harsh and uncaring as you had scrubbed at your skin. His chest feels tight at the thought.
Following suit and undressing himself, he guides you into the shower so that you're standing beneath the warm spray of water. His touch is gentle and caring as he washes your hair the way you'd taught him. He makes sure you're okay before washing your body. Whispering quiet reassurances to you, Spencer rinses the soap suds from your skin and lets you wash his hair with a soft smile on his face. Once you're both finished, he pulls you into his arms and rests his chin on the top of your head.
"Except you," you murmur, and he almost doesn't hear it over the sound of the shower.
"Hm?" he hums, not sure what you mean.
"Everything hurts, except from you."
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begko · 1 year ago
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keep quiet. -seijoh 4
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warnings: 18+ MDNI, poly, implied masturbation, implied sex(? I think), idk how to tag so lmk if there's anything else
contains: fem reader, seijoh 4 x reader (but mostly Matsukawa x reader and Hanamaki x reader)
wc: 1.2 k
a/n: I feel like there's not enough seijoh 4 fics out there so I decided to write one myself lol. This is my first fic so if anyone likes this I'll finish this and try to post more. Just ask and I'll lyk if I can do it!
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Living in an apartment with four other boys never left your days feeling dull. Although you were all in your 20’s and supposedly more mature than your younger selves, they were still boys. 
They would each find ways to somehow piss you off, whether consciously or not. Dirty laundry in the living room, a bag of chips left open on the counter, or the loud moans of a random girl spilling through the crack in their bedroom door. These things wouldn’t typically leave you feeling so annoyed, but hearing a repeating “Yes Oikawa!” at 3 AM– the night before your abnormal psychology midterm may I add– was seriously starting to test your patience. 
Before you knew it, you found your feet gliding stomping down the hallway towards the brunette’s room, unknowingly drawing the other three to peek out from their own doors. 
“I SWEAR TO GOD TOORU. IF SHE DOESN’T SHUT UP YOU WILL NEVER SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY AGAIN.” You emphasized your threat by loudly pounding your fist on his door, then swiftly retreating back to your room, slamming your door for good measure. You put your earbuds back in and tried to focus on the music that filled your ears.
Thankfully, you eventually drifted to sleep, but the groggy feeling you had the next morning did not dissipate, even with the large coffee you had made. After fumbling with your keys for what seemed like forever, you were met with the faces of your roommates, all waiting to greet you. They each gave you a warm smile, which normally would brighten your mood a bit, but the sight of Tooru’s face made a frown appear on your face. Without a word, you disappeared into your room and threw yourself onto the bed, hoping to catch up on some sleep.
“What did I do?” Hajime immediately slapped the back of Tooru’s head in response. “You idiot! She had an exam today and you haven’t even apologized for keeping her up!” Hajime clicked his tongue in annoyance at his best friend. Tooru rubbed the back of his head to soothe the pain. “Well how do I make her forgive me? I didn’t know she had an exam!” 
Hajime merely shook his head, “Figure it out.” he said before going to check on you. As he opened your door, he found you– jeans and all – laying face-down on your bed. A groan of acknowledgement came from your figure, causing Hajime to let out a breathy laugh. “You okay?” 
“Headache.” Was all you managed to say before beckoning him to lay with you. He obliged, letting you roll over before laying on top of your half-made bed with you. He adjusted you both so your head would be comfortably caged in his arms, while you curled into his warmth.
“It’s alright, just get some sleep. I’ll stay with you, baby.” There it was. That nickname he gave you. It always put a smile on your face, this time no different, as you drifted off with your lips sleepily curled up at the corners.
While, yes, they were annoying at times, one could argue that they had a soft spot for you. They would often lay with you if they knew you wanted the company, just as Hajime was doing. When a boy would break your heart, you would find one of them waiting outside of your lecture hall with a bouquet of daffodils, ready to take you out to eat or to a club. With them, you never needed to watch cringey rom-coms while incessantly crying. They distracted you from the heartache, until it eventually melted away. And those nicknames, god, those nicknames. You were sure that they meant nothing, but the way that they locked eyes with you as they uttered ‘Princess’ or ‘Darling’ made your heart stop in ways that felt more than platonic. Sometimes, when you touched yourself in the dead of the night, you found yourself imagining them saying it, driving you to your climax. But you would never admit that to any of them. Just as they wouldn’t admit that you would sometimes let your moans get loud enough for them to hear, driving them to let their hands wander down beyond the waistbands of their boxers. They quickly chased their high, knowing that without the sweet noises of your pleasure seeping through the thin walls, they would be left unsatiated.
You awoke to the delicious smell of food wafting in from the kitchen. After stretching a bit, you opened your eyes to find Hajime no longer next to you. You followed the smell into the main area of your apartment, finding the boys sitting at the kitchen counter chatting while Tooru stood with a pink apron on. 
Your small laugh caused them all to turn their heads to wear you stood, a smile appearing on each of their faces. You walked up to them and put your hands on the counter, surveying the mess left on top of it.
“I made you your favorite! And before you say anything, I was just about to clean up.” That drew another giggle to fall from your lips. You mumbled out a ‘You better.” as Tooru wrapped his arms around your form. “I’m sorry for keeping you up last night, please forgive me?” 
“ Fine, just buy a gag for the next time you wanna bring one of them home.” The four laughed while you began to set the table.
After dinner, Tooru told you to put on a movie while the rest of them did the dishes and grabbed something sweet to snack on. You opted to take a quick shower before doing so and changed into a comfortable tank top and shorts. As you plopped down on the couch and simply chose to re-watch The Hunger Games, Hiro and Issei sat down on either side of you. Issei guided you between his legs, allowing your head to lay on his chest, as Hiro moved your legs into his lap. Hiro draped a blanket over your form, as you gave him a small smile of thankfulness. Soon after, Hajime and Tooru sat in the smaller armchairs and started the movie. 
You’ve seen this movie a million times, after all it was your favorite. But as you watched Katniss tie herself to a tree in an attempt to get some sleep, you began to grow bored. You shifted from your position, fidgeting in hopes of becoming comfortable again. “Sit still, pretty girl. I wanna know what happens next.” You heard Issei whisper into your ear. You freeze. For some reason, the mixture of the hot breath that you felt on your neck and the raspiness of his voice made your stomach form a knot. But it wasn’t until you felt Hiro’s hand start to slowly travel up the length of your leg that you finally realized what you were feeling. You felt hot, making you squirm even more. Issei’s arm snaked around your middle, holding you in place. “I said sit still. We’ll give you a reward if you’re good.” Suddenly it felt like your senses were heightened. The feeling of Issei’s arm and Hiro’s wandering hands made your breathing come to a halt. Is this a dream?
“Do you trust us, pretty girl?”
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sukunas-wife · 9 months ago
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PLEASE TEACHER SUKUNA!! I love him so much. Imagine him “proposing” after attending someone’s wedding and him saying something along the lines of “back when i was a brat, marriage was yet another political affair … im glad i found you now.”
I LOVE THIS SO MUCH I LIVE FOR AND LOVE TEACHER SUKUNA BECause I think of this VERSION in his “normal” form but I also- when he wants to be true form idk how but he can convert to true form. Because cmon he’s Ryomen Sukuna, if anyone can do it, it’s the 1000+ yo sensei. Let me get this show on the road :’)
Let’s pretend this was posted Easter morning as a little Easter gift 🤍🤍🤍
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It was a few years after your graduation and you were well into your years as a teacher at Jujutsu high. 3 almost 4 years, considering you’ve been with Ryomen Sukuna for 3 of those years.
But today was a special day, it wasn’t an anniversary or anything, no it was a wedding.
There you sat by Sukuna, you couldn’t help but take a longer look out of the corner of your eye. You had to fight back a smile at his concentrated brow, it made him look more annoyed than he already seemed to be. You saw his eye flick to you before you looked away to your left to avoid being caught.
Shoko leaned over, “So it’s Gojo and Gojo sensei, those poor kids aren’t going to know what hit them when they come in.” You laughed, “It’ll be hell if Gojo really starts to wear off on Gojo.” She snickered and you both straightened up catching Getou’s unimpressed and raised brow from the altar. You tried not to laugh when you heard Shoko force whisper through her laugh “Gojo sensei might get mad and punish us, be quiet y/n.” You wanted to laugh harder, having to hold yourself back as your stomach trembled and you bit your lip. You could hear Shoko letting out shaky breaths trying to breathe. You sniffled, hands grabbing at your robes, Satoru had persisted everyone dress in traditional attire because he knew it was what Suguru wanted even if he wouldn’t voice it.
You focused back on the scene, unaware of your hand still grabbing tightly to your robes until you felt heat moving over your own hand. Your eyes flicked over to see Sukuna’s hand on yours, he didn’t look at you giving your hand a squeeze telling you to let go. You did, your hand falling flat under his hold, you didn’t miss the way his head lifted slightly and the small twitch at his lips.
You did your best to turn your hand under his heavy hold, just managing to interlock your fingers and pay attention to the Vows. Satoru was saying something ridiculous that even Suguru was wearing a bit of a “are you serious?” Look. You heard Sukuna let out a single snort through his nose and it made you smile. You smiled bigger trying to not laugh when Suguru visibly sighed, shoulders slumping briefly when he looked over the crowd. There was no doubt he saw you and shook trying to force the laughs and smiles back while trying to look down to avoid his look. The time old question came around, “Do you, Satoru Gojo, take Suguru Geto to be your lawfully wedded husband?” Gojo was smiling like a fool, “I do.” Suguru had a small smile, Satoru was a fool but there was no doubt he was Suguru’s fool. “Do you, Suguru Geto, take Satoru Gojo as your lawfully wedded husband?” Suguru’s smile grew to be just as cheesy as Gojo’s “I do.” “You may now kiss the groom.” Yaga looked away not wanting to see the act directly in front of his face, being the one to marry them was enough in his eyes. Everyone cheered and applauded as the two shared their first married kiss. You couldn’t, considering the fact your hand was being held hostage, and due to the fact that everyone was asked to stand outside to congratulate the couple. Sukuna dragged you with him to the grooms while they were signing their marriage certificate. You were confused and were going to ask why, until Sukuna pulled out a gold fountain pen, it had a diamond. The two moved away leaving the paper to him, Geto had a small smile and Gojo was smiling like a fool. “Thanks for doing this man!” Gojo smacked Sukuna’s shoulder only getting a side eye, as he sighed the witness line with a perfect and extravagant signature. Get smiled at you, “Thank you for being a witness to our marriage.” You were confused still, until Sukuna handed you his pen then you understood. “Oh, it’s a pleasure Suguru, who else gets to say they officiated Satoru and Suguru Gojo’s wedding.” Your smile made Geto laugh while you felt like you were signing your life away.
—- —- —- —- —- —-
The evening passed as everyone drank and lived their party up. Sukuna had listened to you talk with Shoko and Haibara who were sitting at the same table. He was busying himself with his sake, eyebrows raising head tilting slightly as he was pleased with the quality. Maybe that dumbass Satoru did know enough to please him. “Come on y/n! Come congratulate the boys with me!” Shoko was surprisingly pulling at your arm and you laughed, “Sorry Sho, I already congratulated them, Take Haibara with you, I’m sure he’d love to go with you.”
“Nooooo I want you to go with me.” Sukuna was watching out of the corner of his eye, questioning why you were so persistent on not jumping up to bully Satoru and Suguru as you usually would. Finally Shoko relented with a sigh, taking Haibara with her, you smiled, shaking your head no as you looked at the table. Noticing sukuna’s Choko was empty, you took the sake to fill his cup. His brow querked, watching your soft features, “Are you unwell, woman?” You looked up at him a little confused “I’m fine Sukuna why?”
He took the choko you had just filled, watching you as he drank. “Then why didn’t you go with your little friend?” You hummed with a small smile filling his choko again, “I’d really rather just be here with you Sukuna.”
That was the end of that conversation as peace fell over your quiet table and your companions came back, Shoko complaining that Haibara kept apologising for her. She had begun to tell you some of the things she had said to which Sukuna had even chuckled to himself. The festivities ran into the last hours of the night, Satoru was tearing it up on the dance floor trying to messily seduce Suguru who was facing second hand embarrassment and turning away from the scene that was being recorded and photographed by not only 5 different professional photographers but everyone who snuck their phone in, you included much to Suguru’s dismay. Sukuna was smiling watching “That idiot Gojo” present a ridiculous scene that he would never live down. You understand now why Gojo never drank when the party came to an end because Gojo became brave and tried to hollow purple a mosquito that had landed on Suguru’s cheek.
At that point you had lost it burying your face against Sukuna’s arm trembling from laughing. He looked at you amused seeing you gasping for air and silently laughing tears welling in your eyes. It was time for him to take you home, maybe he shouldn’t have let you join him in all those rounds of sake.
But he could admit to himself, he enjoyed the confidence you displayed, the sight of you smiling and touching him so casually as if he wasn’t the 1000+ year old king of curses who could so easily overthrow your little world.
—- —- —- —- —-
The Monday after was uneventful, back in School tending to students. Studying them to see where their weaknesses were, figuring out where you need to help them improve.
“What are you thinking?” You turned to find Suguru. “These kids suck, look at this.” Your hand motioned to them, they were getting beat up by Fushiguro who was putting no effort into battling the group of 5. Suguru smiled, closing his eyes, “Well it takes something special to hold your own against someone who’s well trained with a heavenly restriction y/n.” It sounded like he was teasing you. You side eyed him, “I could take him.” You joked and Suguru laughed, shaking his head, “I’m sure you could, but what are you really thinking? You didn’t even notice Satoru standing behind you for 10 minutes not too long ago. He was so offended by your lack of attention he ran to me to come find you.” You rolled your eyes, “Hard to believe that’s really how my superior acts.”
“Well?” Suguru asked, giving you a closed eye smile, it reminded you of a cyndaquil. You sighed, closing your own eyes, “thinking about marriage regretfully.”
You turned to see his eyes widened, “Sukuna proposed? Do you not want to marry him y/n?” He spoke in an incredulous whisper. While looking around, “No, he didn’t propose, and it’s not that I don't see myself marrying him if he ever did propose it’s…”
You fell silent, eyes looking away, “Don’t tell me your planning on over throwing the jujutsu world and that’s why you won’t commit Y/n.” He raised a brow at you and your eyes met his, “I, no! Maybe… no! Well actually…” your head tilted to the side, “no, no no that’s not it I don’t care about that, I don’t wanna say this on school ground because you never know who’s listening. But it’s not that I don’t see myself marrying Sukuna, I don’t see Sukuna marrying me at all.” Suguru gave you a look.
“Y/n you truly are a fool,” you gave him a look back, “A man doesn’t pay thousands for matching robes and kimonos for just any event because he’s just in a relationship y/n. You might not see it, but almost everyone else in this school can see it as plai- stink stink! I made you something.” You turned away from Suguru with a smile, “Stink stink huh?” He sighed, shoulders slumping, “He’s spending too much time on the American side of social media y/n. If I didn’t love him I wouldn’t tolerate this, the same way I can almost confidently say if Sukuna doesn’t genuinely love you even a bit, he wouldn’t tolerate you being as close as you are.” You watched as Suguru smiled, as satoru stood beside him. “A macaroni bracelet.” You smiled watching as Satoru tied it on Suguru’s wrist, “Now we match Suguru.” Suguru laughed through his nose, “That’s why we got custom rings Satoru.” Gojo pouted so you don’t want it?” You turned “Well I’ll leave both of you too it,” you waved them off leaving your poor students to Fushiguro’s hands.
Walking the school you were left thinking to yourself and judging your attire with every window you passed. Out of everyone in this school there was no doubt in your mind that you customise your requests more frequently than anyone, to think just last month you requested this style when Yaga was ordering necessities. You’d even gotten Sukuna to help you change your design a bit, he even branded the back of your shirt collar to have the mark his tongue had oddly enough.
“Where are you going, brat?” Sure enough there was Sukuna standing in an open window looking unimpressed and intrigued at how you were going to walk by him without notice.
“Oh, Sukuna! Sorry, I’ve just been out of it all day.” You looked at his face quickly, instantly deciding it was better to look at the floor. “Come here, it’s been a thousand years since my hearing started to go.” You laughed stepping closer knowing that was a lie, he could probably hear Geto hiding from Gojo half the time. Just as you got closer he grabbed the front of your shirt dragging you out the window like it was nothing. Leaving you stumbling and holding onto him before you felt the ground, the cigarette between his lips didn’t falter, “What’s wrong.” It wasn’t a question. “‘M just tired I guess, and my students aren’t doing too well. They should have a decent grasp on their techniques but it feels like they only get more and more hopeless. It feels like I’m not getting anywhere. So I asked Toji to rough em up for a while so they can at least work with cursed tools and close combat if they fail at their techniques.”
Sukuna was staring and listening, sure you said one thing, but he knew better than that. You never explained so deeply unless you were really trying to convince him of something to avoid something else. “Alright then.” Was all he said leaning back against the wall taking a drag from his cigarette. You let yourself fall into his side against his arm, you stayed like that for a bit until he pulled his arm free, dropping it over your shoulders and pulling you closer into his side. He didn’t know how to ask you what was troubling you so deeply so instead he let you find comfort in his side. He held you tighter when he felt you bury your face in his side, hand coming up to weakly grab his shirt. His hand rubbed your shoulder while he dropped his cigarette, stepping it out of existence, before he pulled you around to his chest. His arm stayed around your shoulders, that hand moving to the back of your head holding you head against his chest, his secondhand came to your back slowly rubbing up and down, resting his chin on your head trying to comfort you the way he had seen you comfort a child on one mission. Your sniffle sounded so pathetic yet it squeezed his chest in a way he didn’t understand, “Thank you Kuna…” your slight tug at his shirt didn’t loosen until you pulled away from him and he let you go.
The sun had started to set leaving you in an orange glow, you were curious why he was even around the school if he didn’t have a class today. “Why ar-I had a mission it was over before it began.” You smiled up at him, “I see.”
“Let me walk you back to your dorm, before your brats come to look for you.” His hands tucked into his pockets, you were quick to hug his arm when he offered his elbow with the slightest movement. It was nice, almost like you could have a normal life with Sukuna one day. Your walk was quiet and nice, you listened to Sukuna talk about his mission being a special grade, and a local deity of some village. She had been parading around saying she was the God of Curses, so he had to prove a point. You were humoured by the way his chest puffed when you offered praise saying of course The True King of Curses would be able to conquer Gods with ease.
It was after you were standing in your door facing him that you noticed him lingering. Did he want to come in? You were about to ask when he held out his right hand, you were confused, “Let me see your hand.” You were quick to put your hand in his and studied your hand with a blank expression, you became self conscious of your nails and what if your hands looked funny??? What if- you stopped feeling his thumb run over your knuckles, “Interesting.” Was all he said before letting your hand go.
“Rest y/n,” you watched as he stepped back, “Do your best to not worry so much. Only a fool would waste their life away wondering if something deemed impossible would ever really happen or not.” You were confused until your phone rang. You pulled it out looking away from Sukuna’s retreating figure. It was a message in a group chat with Geto, Gojo, and Shoko, ‘Oh, our little Y/n is taking a man to her home.’ Shoko sent a clear picture of where you were holding onto Sukuna’s arm, he was staring down at you, you were looking up at him, and your dorm house was very clearly in frame. Then Geto sent an image, “It seems she had it planned from earlier today.” It was a video of Sukuna dragging you out the window followed by a picture of the way Sukuna held you against him. Gojo finished you off, “I will give it till the end of the year and she’s either pregnant or getting married.”
—- —- —- —- —-
Spring days warmed to summer afternoons as months passed, you found yourself dying on the engawa in your new uniform. It was a light material and fitted long sleeve shirt and loose pants like Suguru’s, you’d take Toji’s advice and get shoes like his, they were perfect for slipping off and throwing at people like Gojo even if they’d never hit him. He’d forget in the moment and would fold easily.
One thing didn’t change, the mark of Sukuna stayed permanently embroidered on your shirt. “Y/n?” You lifted your head from the wood, opening your eyes, “Oh, hi.” You smiled at Shoko who gave you a sympathetic look, “Why aren’t you at the school? We’ve been looking for you.”
“Oh, my kids are on a mission and I get the feeling they won’t be back till tomorrow. I didn’t want to do any extra work so I just came home.” She watched as you moved to lay on your side, one leg stretched out and the other propped up. Your head being half up by an arm that was propped up, your free hand grabbing a fan to fan yourself, “It’s so hot even in the shade it’s ridiculous, I need the fall season to come back.”
She watched you, “Your significant other was looking for Y/N, maybe you should find him?” She shrugged, “But that’s all I know though, have fun.”
You whined licking your feet, with the summer festivities there have been so many festivals, tourists, and things festering, everyone’s been on double time. Meaning you hadn’t seen Sukuna as frequently as before, and now he was looking for you? You should have called him, but your phone fell off the engawa and you hadn’t picked it up, and Shoko had left before you remembered. They passed as you laid there spacing out in your own head in fantasies of arguments you’d probably never have but preparing so you could win. Your argument with Gojo was interrupted with Sukuna’s voice, “How long are you planning to ignore me woman?” You rushed sitting up forcing your stiff muscles to cooperate.
“I wasn’t ignoring you, I was just…” your head tilted to the side, “thinking over a conversation I had with Satoru.” He knew instantly you were just arguing with a figurative Gojo in your head, oddly enough he had caught Satoru doing the same. He humoured himself thinking the two of you had some unknown connection to insult and argue with one another. “Take this and get ready, we’re going out tonight.”
You were excited the moment you saw the box, Sukuna surprisingly had very good taste in attire, but what you were more excited for was that if he got you a new set of robes it means he also had a new set of robes to match. You jumped up carrying the heavy box with you getting ready to run into your dorm before you stopped, placing the box down and being about eye level with Sukuna thanks to the raised engawa. You pulled his face to the side kissing his cheek, “Thank you, I’ll get ready quickly.” Just as you were about to rush off you stopped smiling sheepishly, “Will you pass me my phone? Please?” He looked down following your finger, there it was, your phone. He reluctantly picked it up muttering something under his breath until he saw your Lock Screen. There was no chance in hell he hadn’t noticed someone following both of you to your home. Yet there was proof, he was becoming too comfortable with you. The picture from behind, of you holding onto his arm from months ago. He passed you your phone, “I’ll be back after you let me know you’re ready.” You smiled nodding, “I’ll call you as soon as I finish up.”
—- —- —- —- —-
It took you an hour to have a quick shower, and fix the robes you thought were so pretty. They were light blue and white, and you couldn’t help unceremoniously flailing your arms around making the extended fabric of your sleeves flutter and fly around with loud sounds, “It’s so pretty.” Your little pose in the mirror made you feel cute before you tied your hair back with the blue hair ribbon. It was failure after failure until you gave up and Sukuna arrived. He walked in to watch you aggressively pulling the ribbon out of your hair flinching when you lost 2 or 3 hairs. You watched Sukuna standing behind you when you were aggressively tie your hair to fail, finally he smacked your hand lightly when you tried to yank the ribbon out again. “Stop mistreating my things L/n.” His voice was a stern warning when he slipped the ribbon from your hand, you looked down slightly feeling his hands run over your hair. His fingers running over your scalp pulling a bit of your hair back, you watched through the mirror as he pulled the ribbon from between his lips tying it easily, you were going to move but you noticed how his hand lingered on the strand of hair tied by the ribbon. He let it slowly slip from his hold, “We need to leave.”
Sukuna had brought you to walk with him through the Arashiyama Bamboo grove. It was a summer night, but also the night of a festival meaning it wouldn’t be as busy as you normally would be. It was exactly what you expected as you walked through the Bamboo forest, full moon rising and lighting up the sky.
You held onto Sukuna’s arm, head laid on his shoulder as he casually led you through the space. Until you made it to decent sized clearing you’d seen many tourist use for photos. “Sukuna,” your voice was like a whisper. His eyes flicked to look down at you, “hm.” “Can we take a picture here? This is the first time we’ve been together here and I’ve seen people take pictures here, so maybe we can….” You were smiling at him hopefully. He looked at you a second longer than you liked to admit, “Your ambition is palpable, I’ll feed into your desires for now y/n.” You didn’t miss the spark in his eyes, as you handed him your phone, he set it up along with his on the fence point across from where you stood. It was weird for him to use his phone, usually any photos you took you’d send to him whether he’d ask or not and he’d be content with that.
Still he stood by your side, you pulled his heavy arm around his waist to rest your head on his shoulder. Your right arm behind his back to hug his waist, your left hand reached out to take his right hand to hold it in the picture. It was cute, your phone screen flashed but Sukuna’s hadn’t so you stayed still hoping it would. That was until you felt Sukuna pull himself away, you looked at him about to stop him.
Your expression was priceless, your dropped jaw, wide eyes. The look of disbelief, the way your hands smacked your face covering your eyes and moving down to cover your mouth while you started to tear up. He hadn’t even had time to ask the question before you were crying, “Listen to me before you started crying y/n.” You sniffled, wiping your face vigorously and unceremoniously with your sleeves nodding and trying to pay attention to him.
He tried his best to look at you, but his eyes faltered and he took a deep breath, “I understand the concept of marriage in our eyes were to completely different things,” he rolled his eyes, “I’ve heard you say it many many times that if you ever married a man it would be because you’re affections were deeply requited. My own,” he closed his eyes clenching his jaw for a second, “My own interests in marriage were strictly political or to produce what could be a stronger generation.” His eyes were somewhere beyond you, before he settled on your face, you could see the brief flash of vulnerability, “When I was an ambitious and aggravating brat I had only ever thought of marriage as a way to improve one’s lineage, as the golden age of sorcery came to an end for its own reason, my ideals of a political marriage have come to an for one sole reason.” He opened the ring box showing a flashy golden ring, “Your presence is peculiar, your ambition and confidence are palpable, there is no soul on this earth that has ever managed to catch the attention of my body, soul and mind. I feel as if our lives have become ensnared with one another like the wild wisteria. As displeasing as it sounds, I can wholeheartedly admit y/n, that in all my years, with every breath, I am gratified, elated, and beyond pleased to have found you, so now I ask you,” you were tearing up at his little speech, “Y/n…” he paused and you could feel his judgement for your years before you saw the smile tug at the edge of his lips, he knew he had you hooked and you wouldn’t say no even if he made you stand there for another 30 minutes, “Will you have the honour in marrying- YES! Sukuna, yes!” You tacked him in a hug, kissing him and kicking him back, he held you with one arm snapping the box closed to not lose your ring. He was sat back on the ground, you were in a weird position of kneeling and lying on him while you wrapped your arms around his neck kissing him, he kissed you back pulling you against him tighter in a rougher kiss. You laughed against his lips pulling away taking his face in your hands kissing his forehead, cheeks and lips again. He let you, amused by your actions he didn’t fight off your public displays of affection, instead he revelled in the feeling of your lips on his skin until you stopped offering to help him up. After he stood you were snuggling up to his side hugging his arm, you didn’t care about the right, you were content enough knowing he had asked the question, at this rate in your brain you were saying he could give you a bread tie with a craft gem and you’d probably show it off anyways. He looked down at you, your little love struck closed eye smile. Still he took your hand and you opened your eyes watching as he popped open the white swan ring box, sliding the ring onto your finger, it was a perfect fit. You ooo’ed before reaching up to his face to pull him down and kiss him again. You were going to pull away when you felt his hand pull you back into him, he kissed you this time, “This is your warning y/n, if I find you mistreating my things against you will be punished, hmm.” You felt the embarrassment and heat on your face when you buried your face against his shoulder, “I uh… I understand .”
—- —- —- —- —-
“Alright- so as Satoru so kindly pointed out,” you forced a smile at Gojo who snickered, this is a waste of time because Mr. Nah, I’m Sato Gojo, wants to prove he’s the best he’s taking all special grade assignments this months everyone just throw your stuff at Hoe-jo.” Shoko snickered and Gojo protested “That’s not what I meant! I don’t wanna get stuck doing all the special grades!”
“WELL THAT'S TOO DAMN BAD SA TO RU You’re doing them because you made me mad” your line made Sukuna laugh through his nose catching almost everyone’s attention for a second, before he reclined in his sets arms crossed his chest.
“Now, Yaga wants us to list down things we need for this new semester and no one is going to take time later this week to do it so I’m doing my best to do a general list,” everyone watched as you started to hang a large paper pad on the roll in board, “So this is the list of general items everyone usually requests.” You motioned with your hand to the names off most of the teachers, “you see here-IM SORRY-“ Gojo cut you off looking at you in disbelief, “but what’s that???” He was pointing at you accusingly and you were confused just to see Geto, Shoko and Haibara as equally judgmental, Nanamin, Toji and Sukuna were having their own conversation, you felt your eye twitch “what do you mean SATORU, I JUST EXPLAINED ITS A LIST- NO Y/N WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT DO I MEAN!? LOOK AT THAT!” He pointed again and you looked at the board, “Satoru please I will cry if your playing with me again,” Sukuna looked over briefly at the mention of your crying. Geto spoke up, “Y/n… I really don’t think he’s playing if you just think about this for a second.” You watched as he waved his left hand around as if telling you to continue, “Suguru, If I didn’t think he was playing I would 100% give him an answer, and I did-“ Shoko gave you an incredulous look, “Sweetie, y/n.” You watched as she held up her left hand, taking her ring finger between her thumb and pointer finger. It was then you slowly looked at the board, your hand splayed out on the paper. There was your ring, gleaming at its mention under the school's light.
“Oh… THAT'S what you mean.” You looked back at Gojo, he was giving you an “Are you serious look?.” You cleared your throat, “You see Satoru, all those times you say you move in silence because you're a beast of prey or something like that?” He raised a brow, “So you do watch my snap stories? “Regrettably yes, they make me laugh and cringe, but you see -OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT!” You pointed out the window with pure fear, they all rushed over letting you slip out the room unnoticed, “Escaped that situation.” Just as you were making your way down the hallway you heard screaming coming from the room, more specifically Satoru, “WHO SAID YOU COULD MARRY MY Y/N RYOMEN!?” you heard the whack clear as day, “GAH Sugguurruuu why’d you hit meeee???” You smiled to yourself, “Who said she was your y/n Satoru?”
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Tag List: @sad-darksoul @satorisgirl @bontensbabygirl @lupita97lm @queen-luna-007 @venus-seeks @bofadeezs @sakuxxi @mercymccann @certainduckanchor @najiiix @bakugou-katsukis-wife @amitiel-truth @souyasplushie @mylovelessnightmare @ynjimenez @dolliira @princessluvz @furiousblacktiger @anyaswlrd @shytastemakerthing
@simpforyoubitch @domainofmarie @ilovemybabies378 @cyder-puff
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theshy1sout · 7 months ago
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Okay, so
I finally got my bf into reading Homestuck. I was on a phone call with him as he read it at loud, voice-acting and stuff, while I was drawing. Today he reached the Dave first appearance and he discovered Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff.
You have to understand that I always thought that this comics was just a stupid joke that only Hussie understands and finds funny. Bc the moment I saw the page with the dog (you know which one) I left the comics and never looked at it again. Until today.
My boyfriend read every single page of Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff in complete silence. I asked him what's wrong, and he said "This is extremely sad". I was confused so he started explaining to me how this comics is a way little Dave was coping with trauma of living with his abusive brother. I didn't believe that, so I started reading the comics again and you know what?
Imagine adult Dirk, being completely under Lord English control, going shopping with little Dave and destroying supermarket in frustration of not finding anything that Calliborn would recognize as a food, being arrested by police in process and leaving little Dave alone hidden somewhere in the shop.
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Imagine little Dave being pushed from the stairs so many times by his bro, he drew a caricature of himself pushing his bro off the stairs in revenge. Or being regularly beaten so hard and often, so he drew comics in which his brother got beaten up, shitted on and even brutally killed.
Imagine little Dave being so hungry (bc of course brother didnt give him proper food) he literally threw himself at a Subway sandwich machine during idk a walk with his bro (probably) and tried to steal some food or even just smell the actual normal food and while doing so got abandoned by his brother. Again.
Of course we can't interpret this way every single page of Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff, but come on, if you start seeing it, you cant stop sensing that every single page is either a way Dave coped with a traumatic experience or a way he kind of got revenge on his brother in a way his brother wouldn't understand and notice and beat him up for doing so.
I searched internet for so long and can't find a single person who would interpret it this way. Am I wrong though??
It gets better. As we know, Dave from universe B also drew this comic. And we even got a directly explained to us interpretation: he started drawing it as a simple comic (probably to cope with the loneliness). Then when Batterwitch became a real danger and he saw that but couldn't react directly, he started using his comics as a way to show what Betty Crocker was really like. So we also had this two characters, one represented Betty Crocker and the second one represented society, and they had this very abusive relationship that had references to situations in real life in Universe B.
So my theory (or more like my bfs theory) is that Dave from universe A was using his comics for the same exact thing. He drew situations from his life in a unreadable for others way (and also no one taught him how to draw or write, and maybe later he kept the shitty format so it's unreadable and too shitty for his brother to read) to cope with trauma. We see in this comics that Sweet Bro is shaving himself above Jeffs face while he sleeps, a thing that Dave's bro could definitely do. We see some pages of Dave trying to understand sport, economy and politics in his own way, bc his brother of course didn't teach him shit. And we even got a page that might suggest that Dave was sexually molested by his bro. There are many scenes of Bro being abusive to Jeff or Jeff getting his revenge. We also have Geromy, a possible interpretation of John, and on one page Jeff (Dave) tries to come to Geromy's (John's) place to visit him, but he can't and he drowns instead (which is so sad???).
I could go through every single page with this interpretation. I think some pages being a foreshadowings for what is happening later in Homestuck is just an additional joke, Hussie loves having layers of meta twists and many unrelated things relating or referencing each other for no reason. I don't think the comics is Dave's unconscious traveling through time and revealing the future, bc if so then we would see every single page of Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff being a foreshadowing, and they are not. I also think that the huge wink to the audience was the scene of Dave being pushed by his bro down the stairs and we see him falling with accompaniment of a little panel of Jeff saying "I warned you about the stairs, bro". For me this is a visible hint that this is what this page of the comics was about, it was a way of coping with trauma, it was Dave drawing his brother falling down the stairs and himself saying probably a line that his brother irl was saying to him a lot.
Dave drew his life. His own horror of a life and it was probably more terrifying than he revealed in act 6.
Do you remember the iconic "bro hug" from Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff? A hug from his bro, sth that Dave really needed and wanted, a simple hug that he was very nervous to asked for, he literally drew himself hugging his brother in his second comic, and then we have the very same scene of Davepeta and Arquius hugging (part of them was Dave hugging Dirk, even if artificial), and then we have the exactly opposite of the scene between actual Dave and Dirk, when instead of enthusiastic "we're doing it bro, its happening, were making it" it's Dave saying "fuck forgive me for what I'm doing, this is so messed up fuck" and it's not even full embrace like in his comic, it's awkwardly side by side hug when they didn't even sit on the same level (like in the comic or with sprites), no, Dave is lower, he's smaller, he's scared, he cant face his brother, he wants to but he can't and this is just aaaansnanbska dmnsksnsdkydykdky
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Can someone talk about this comic more? This flashy shitty documentary of Dave's life drawn by idk maybe 8 years old Dave ? The more I read Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff, the more depressed I am, cause this is so sad if I'm right about it. I really wish it was just stupid colorful comic without any deeper meaning, just faking to have one or sth....
Also I think Geromy is black bc either Dave didn't know how John looks like so he imagined him being somewhat similar to his fav president Obama or maybe he was just trying to make John's character as unlike John as possible so no one would suspect a thing. Or maybe he just imagine himself being friends with young Obama, who knows.
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After editing this chaotic rambling I have two more things as a prove for my theory. One is picture above, and second is what Hussie said about Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff:
“SBaHJ is absolutely inseparable from HS, and has been almost from the start. If you don't understand this, then you don't understand HS very well. SBaHJ is like the mentally handicapped step brother of MSPA, requiring special attention, but no less cherished as a part of the family. It was originally intended as the chief source of in-house memes for dialogue, but this is ultimately a superficial purpose. Though it only has 20+ strips, it contains a pretty dense and internally consistent language of recurring symbols and typo-driven grammars, applicable as a rich sub-cognitive lexicon for highlighting elusive elements woven into the mythology of the story which tend to be shrouded in the unconscious.”
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plmp0 · 8 months ago
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The Sex Love House PT 3
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Summary: Welcome to the love house where a lot of stories will infold, 7 participants will have a chance to live together in the same house for a mounth while still doing their normal activities, will they find real love in this short period? Or at least this is what ur friend want u to believe. Part 1 Part 2
Warnings: a very manipulative!jay, manipulative!sunghoon, manipulative!heeseung, ex!bf!Jake, everyone is a perv in this house, reader is clueless, shameless reader, kinda stalker reader, Siyeon (from dreamcatcher) is also part of this, this is a pure filth, explicit content.
Smut warning: hand!job, oral (f), cum eating, desperate Jake, kind of subby!jake, p in v, unprotected sex (cause it's fiction), overstimulation, a lot of teasing, i think that's it
A/N: This part was supposed to go out a long time ago but i forgot to save it and i had to re-write it again so it's not as good cause i got annoyed sorry. Also this is not proof read so there might be some mistakes and typos so yeah
It's the week-end Jake woke up today going straight to ur room knocking on ur door before entering, u were still in ur shower robe hands blow drying ur hair as he looked at u through the mirror "oh hi i was going to talk to u after i finish, we didn't get a chance to yesterday" u said upon brushing ur hair.
He noded his head eyes scanning u, u got more beautiful since the last time he saw u, he's ngl he forgot about u at some point but he just woke up one day having u running through his head, what could u be doing now? Did u get taller? Did u let ur hair grow? How many relationships have u been through? He had these small thoughts about u, but everytime his heart tries to soften to u, the memory of ur ghosting and its side effects come back to him, it was like a trauma for him, getting in the way of every relationship he tried to be in, always having doubts about the other part, not able to trust her fully, he really has abandonement issues now.
"There is no need to bring back what happened in the past" u said getting him out of his thoughts, u turned off the blowdryer approaching him eyes softening now that he is close to u, ur guilt kicking in immediatly "m so sorry for what i did, i know nothing can excuse what i did but i wasn't mature enough" u said holding his hand in urs, he cleared his throat avoiding looking at u, pulling out his hand gentely and that was enough for u to know that he didn't forget u.
U sighed feeling bad but deciding to brush off the topic "so tell me, what r u doing now?" U asked hoping to get rid of the awkwardness noting how he didn't let a word out.
He smiled shrugging "i took over my dad's work"
U smiled back remembering how sweet his dad used to be and how good he treated u "i hope he is doing fine"
"He is" was all he replied with, taking a seat on ur bed "ahh right! Do u want something?" U asked after runing out of ideas to lighten the mood, he sighed hands massaging his forhead "i just wanted to ask if u have some pain relievers"
"Ohhh? Ur head hurts?" U asked hands busy searching in ur drawer for the said pills, taking it out and handing it to him "here" he took it from u thanking u and putting it in his pocket .
U sat on ur chair facing him now forgetting that u r still in ur robe that is about to open in any second now, ur hair isn't fully dry u look so... so tempting Jake's eyes can't help but stare at u head empty only u running through it.
"U don't want the guys to know that we were together?" U asked after talking for sometime now without getting a reply from him.
He cleared his throat again " ah idk i didn't know if u'd like them to find out so i chose to not say anything" he shrugged, u smiled at him he is still considerate as always "i don't really mind but since we didn't talk about it the first time let's just keep it between us"
He smiled back wanting to stay with u longer, seeing u now in front of him again brought back his old feelings towards u.
U heard ur phone ring on the table behind u "excuse me" u let out softly turning back and stretching to get it without standing from ur seat, exposing ur bare thighs and a faint sight of ur blue panties to Jake whose eyes were boring into u tongue darting on his lower lip , he gulped hands sweating and itching to feel ur soft skin, u smiled at ur succeed attempt to get ur phone seating properly now and answering ur call, Jake's eyes didn't leave u even for a second scanning the way u pout whenever something is not pleasing u, the way u roll the end of ur hair listening to what's been said on the other line, lips smiling from time to time flashing ur white teeth, everything about u was beautiful and he miss having u for himself.
U made eye contact with him in the middle of the call mouthing a sorry, Jake only smiling at u as he waited for ur call to end (but wishing it to take longer so he can drink in ur beautiful features more).
U ended the call that was from one of ur co-workers asking u about some file u wondering why tf they want that in the week end, u sighed looking at Jake noting the way he is looking at u.
"That took longer than i expected sorry"
He didn't budge even when u waved ur hand in front of him, only waking up when he heard ur soft voice calling his name and he almost let a sound out from that "are u okay? U r spacing out a lot" u asked concerned, eyes looking at the way his adam apple boped down before hearing him gulp loudly.
He shakes his head like he was in some sort of trance head dizzy as he inhaled u r fresh smell now that u approached him " m fine dw" u sat next to him, resting ur back on the wall and he followed ur movement head titling to face u " u r still as beautiful as u were" he let out making u blush a little bit as u give him a thank u chewing on ur lips fingers playing with the hem of ur robe.
He massaged his shoulders letting out a small groan and u turned to look at him he really look so tired "do u want me to give u a massage it's gonna help u relax a little bit" u said.
And he stayed still for a minute thinking about ur offer before noding in agreement, u stood up going to take an oil u use whenever u wanna relax "come on lay down" u rushed him and he did "i think it'd be better if u remove ur shirt" u said as he removed it and tossed it somewhere on the bed, u straddled his back he pressed his face on the matress upon feeling ur weight on top of him, his body shivering when the cold oil met his skin ur hands following after, massaging his nerves skilfully, he shut his eyes his body relaxing while releasing soft groans every now and then.
U were so good with ur hands he almost fell asleep if it wasn't for the unintentional scrach he felt on his back, u just continued working ur magic ignoring the way his body squirmed, u smirked a little bit knowing exactly how he liked that, u kept digging ur nails on his skin saying a sorry with a fake pout whenever u do so.
He could feel his muscles tensing up again, his forehead now resting on his hands teeth biting his lower lip not wanting to let a sound out, but it was impossible at this point especially when u brushed ur fingers faintly over his soft spot, u knew his body so well doing the most to get a reaction out of him, ur competitive side kicking out until a moan skipped his lips making u stop ur movements immediately "ohhh?" U said mockingly leaning forward until ur lips met his ears "u r still the same Jakey" he whimpered his hips humping the mattress shamelessly making u chuckle "what are u doing?" U asked faking a confused tone as u moved from his body standing in front of him. Jake titled his head looking at u confusion written all over his face, u cocked an eyebrow at him as he didn't stop his movements his eyes boring into ur body that was all exposed for him at this point, the robe not doing any job at hiding ur skin, the small curls at the end of ur hair still wet arms crossed waiting for him to speak but he didn't, u sighed clenching ur jaw slightly leaning forward lifting his chin with ur index finger "where r u looking? My face is here" u exclaimed wanting to get something out of him but his eyes are fixed on ur lips, u dart ur tongue on them watching how his own mouth is open almost drooling at the sight of you. Jake has always been like that, everything u did used to turn him on, and it looks like nothing changed.
U chuckled softely kneeling on the floor so u can face him blinking slowely as u caressed his cheeks titling ur head and getting closer to him until ur noses touched u were planing to tease him a little bit more but he rushed kissing u like he was starving for years, his lips moving so fast tongue rolling around urs u let go of his cheeks one hand now around his neck while the other one is searching for his hair tugging slightly as he moans in the kiss.
U left his mouth panting for some air, u looked his way and u can't help the heat that went to ur cheeks when u saw him, he looked so fucked out just from a kiss coming closer to kiss u again "so eager" u thought
U kissed him again his hands holding onto ur thighs, Jake now sitting properly without breaking the kiss making u also stand and straddle his lap, u started rolling ur hips slowly his hands following your pace, his thumbs tracing circles on ur inner thighs, ur hand going from his hair to his neck applying a small pressure and he groaned in the kiss.
"Shhh" u warned him and he whined in return making u smile in the kiss as ur hands traveled to his pants, unbuttoning them and sliding them down his knees along with his boxers, he let a deep breath out his body tensing up as he waited for u to touch him, the anticipation killing him.
"Please" he managed to mutter out his dick twitching in the cold air as his head tilted backwards and a sigh left his lips when u wrapped ur hand around his cock.
Ur thumb pressed on his slit collecting the precum that is oozing from it and spreading it along his length, his grip on ur thighs tighten as his body shakes under ur touch, he moaned in the kiss the need of breathing making him part his lips slightly, his moans were so loud despite him trying to stay silent his eyes were rolling to the back of his head.
His hips started moving up to meet ur strokes as his moans increased in volume, u felt him getting close, ur thumb now pressing on his slit again teasing him by stroking the base and going to the top before repeating the same process.
"Baby" he moaned against ur lips as his hips buckled upwards his stomach and chest rising, his hands are gripping ur thighs tightly, his nails digging in ur flesh, his toes curling as his mouth parted in a silent scream the only thing coming out of his mouth was a gasp as his eyes rolled back.
His dick twitched a few times his cum landing on ur robe and his chest, ur eyes were scanning the view, his head was still resting on the bed his eyes closed, his whole body shaking still feeling the waves of his orgasm, he was so sexy like this, and u can't deny that the thought of him getting off just from u stroking him made u so turned on, u were sure that your panties were soaked wet.
He was catching his breath when he felt u getting off his lap, he opened his eyes, his chest moving up and down, his dick still twitching as he saw the mess he made.
"Fuck y/n im sorry" he said trying to grab a tissue but his body was numb and his mind hazy.
U didn't pay him any attention going straight to ur closet pretending to get another robe and discarding the dirty one on the ground.
Jake was looking at u his dick already hardening again his eyes were roaming over ur body his gaze fixated on the curve of ur ass and the way the blue panties hugged ur thighs.
He wanted to eat u alive, he wanted to make u cry out his name, he wanted to fuck u, and u wanted the same, his dick was pulsating against his stomach, and all his senses were focused on u.
U felt his stare, turning back to face him a smirk forming on ur lips as u took a step forward and his hands were instantly on ur waist pulling u down on his lap, he attacked ur neck kissing, biting and sucking on it, he didn't want to leave a mark so he didn't suck for a long time, he went lower until his teeth bit ur collar bone his hands pulling down the new robe as his lips met the top of ur breast leaving kisses and licks.
"Oh" a sigh escaped ur mouth as u tilted ur head backwards, his right hand went down cupping ur clothed pussy while his left hand held onto ur waist for support.
He started moving his fingers, drawing circles on ur clothed clit, he didn't stop the movement of his mouth on ur breast as u started grinding against his hand. Jake was like a starving man, his touches so earger, his actions desperate.
U held onto his shoulders for support as he pushed u back laying on the matress, his body covering ur smaller frame as he started sucking on ur right breast his hand moving away the panties and entering two fingers inside ur pussy making you arch ur back as a gasp left ur lips.
His fingers were hitting the right spot and he went to kiss you again, his mouth making it hard to breathe, the pleasure was too much, ur eyes were watering, and his dick was rubbing against ur thigh, Jake broke the kiss panting like a dog delivering kisses on you stomach as his thumb was circling your clit, u were so sensitive his every move was sending shivers down ur spine, he was so focused on pleasing you, and it wasn't hard for him to get the job done, it's like he has been dreaming about this for a long time, he was now on a face level with your pussy he groaned biting his lips before replacing his thumb with his tongue, a scream slipped your lips and your back arched high in the air, his grip on ur waist was bruising, he didn't want to let go.
He hummed upon tasting you his eyes closed tongue going wild making it hard for you to contain ur moans and u were sure by now that if Heeseung was in his room he 100% have heard you, his room next to urs and that just added to ur heat making u go crazy, you were close by now already worked out just from earlier, Jake's finger went deeper making you let out a cry hands tugging at his hair and he moaned upon that "Cum for me" he mumbled against your pussy, the vibrations of his voice enough to make u reach your peak.
You cried out his name legs shaking uncontrollably, head dizzy, and chest heaving, and Jake didn't stop licking on ur clit not even giving u time to calm down and recover from ur first orgasm, "No-omg" your hands went to pull him away but instead you found them back on his hair pushing his face closer, his tongue was so skilled and u can feel yourself getting close again letting out small cries , the feeling of his tongue was so amazing and u can feel your whole body burning up, it didn't take long before u came again squirting on his face this time.
Jake pulled away his lips wet, face glistening with your juices, his eyes dark, "That's so fucking hot" he muttered licking his lips and wiping his face with his hands, he was looking at you hungrily, his cock red and dripping with precum, you wanted him inside you.
"C'mon here" u said pulling him closer for a sloppy kiss tasting yourself on his tongue as you started moving your hips, both of you were a moaning mess, the need to be close was so strong.
"Jake" u moaned against his lips and he hummed eyes still closed "fuck me" you said and his eyes shot open his mouth hanging open his breath got caught in his throat, and u smiled at him softly you were always a fan of his reactions always acting like he hasn't heard these words before as if it's his first time and you were sure that he was now going crazy, ur words made him feel like his heart is about to explode.
He didn't hesitate to get between your legs, his dick rubbing against ur wet folds as his mouth went to suck on your neck, your hands went to his back leaving red scratch marks as his tip was pressing on your hole, the need to enter was strong his eyes scanning your expressions as he entered you, a satisfied sigh escaped both of you lips, you were so warm and wet around him he didn't have any energy to start slow, his thrusts were hard and rough his hands holding onto the sheets as his hips met yours with a slap, the air was filled with your moans and the sound of skin slapping, the bed creaked underneath you and you could hear it hitting the wall, it's not a surprise if u end up with a hole in the wall, and he was going so fast he didn't give you a chance to adjust his cock hitting the right spots, "fuckk you feel so good Damn" he groaned his hips moving by themselves his head dropped enjoying the way you feel around him, your hands went to his back pulling him closer wanting to feel him deeper, his chest was now touching yours, his skin was so hot and he was sweating a lot, you can see his veins popping his mouth hanging open as his forehead was touching yours, his thrusts becoming more aggressive and it was hard to catch your breath, you can feel yourself getting close for the third time tonight your stomach twisting and your eyes rolling to the back of your head, Jake's hand moved away from the sheets gripping the headboard as he was slamming into you loving how you moan his name, he was close, so close, his dick twitched inside of you.
He was so lost in pleasure he had other plans for you but he forgot about everything focusing only on the delicious feeling of you he swear he hasn't felt this good since being with you, he doesn't know why but u just enjoys it more when it's you, his thrusts were now unrhythmic moaning as his hands went to the pillow and you let out a surprised yelp when his other hand grabbed a fistful of your hair pushing your head back loving how you look for this angle ,his cock was throbbing and pulsating inside you the knot in your stomach was so tight and you could feel yourself reaching your peak, Jake was grunting his eyes shut curses leaving his lips "fuckk fuck fuck" and you could feel the tears building up so sensitive from the previous releases and it was a matter of time before both of you came at the same time, he pulled out after spilling his seeds all over your stomach.
He let go of your hair and collapsed on the bed next to you, both of you were panting your minds were blank and the air was still thick, the room smelled of sex, Jake's hair was sticking to his forehead, his chest was moving up and down, the only sound in the room was the heavy breathing. You were laying there trying to come back from the high, you looked at Jake his eyes closed, his face still sweaty and red, your eyes moved lower, his chest and stomach are covered with his own cum and he didn't seem to mind.
You chuckled "what?" He asked eyes opening to look at you.
"Look at the mess" you said pointing at his stomach, he sat up a little bit checking it out wanting to say something but he stopped after seeing you crawling, ur hands dropping his body back as u leaned down collecting all the cum that was on his body licking it up making sure to leave no trace behind Jake had to slap himself to see if he was dreaming, his eyes were bulging and his mouth was dry 'fuck you are so sexy y/n" it was too much, too many feelings all at once, it was hard to control the heat pooling in his groin and he can feel himself getting hard again, he let a deep breath out when you stopped to show him the cum u collected before swallowing it.
"Fuck so dirty" he said pulling you for a heated kiss, your tongue battling his for dominance, he was already hard again his body was aching for u and u couldn't help but rub your pussy against his shaft.
"Please" he begged, and as much as u wanted him you were sure that your body can't take anymore, already sore from yesterday and the events that took place minutes ago.
"Next time Jakey" u said pecking his lips and he whined, his hands went down to rub your pussy and u let him, u were sure that you can't do it but a few moments later u were bouncing on his cock again.
-
You sighed after what happened Jake stayed with your for a bit helping you move to the shower wanting to help but u stopped him wanting to relax for few minutes and have an alone time and he nodded pecking ur forehead and leaving. You took longer than intended cleaning your body lazily, you went out expecting to find a mess in ur room, ur robe thrown on the ground along with ur panties and the sheets wrinkled but instead everything was neat your clothes on the basket another sheets on the bed and that alone made your day.
Jake was sweet and caring as always and ur heart ached with guilt, ur mind was still in shock from everything but you didn't have the energy to spend a long time thinking, you dressed up wearing a long blue dress with a small slit on your left leg, drying your hair only with a towel putting on some perfume and walking out. U heard some noises on the living room and u followed finding everyone except from Jake and Siyeon sitting on the table having breakfast
Jay's eyes followed your every move his jaw almost dropping, the sight of your thighs driving him insane and it was so unfair, "wow y/n u look so beautiful" Heeseung said devouring you with his eyes and Joy nodded her head while Sunghoon didn't say a thing his eyes scanning u head to toe while stuffing his mouth with food, Joy pulled the chair next to her patting it for you "come on". She is such a sweetheart and u can't help the smile forming on your lips, you took the seat sitting now between her and Sunghoon and across from Heeseung and Jay, a small groan slipping Jay's lips when he saw u sitting so close to Hoon, his eyes were dark remembering yesterday's night but he wanted to take care of you today not liking how he let u go without helping. He grabbed ur plate putting a big amount of various food and handing it to u making u chuckle "i don't think m gonna be able to finish this but thank u" u said softly making him smile as well "enjoy, u need to regain ur energy".
Joy and Heeseung were talking about something but u can't pay attention u didn't realize how much hungry u re until u had ur first bite of food. "I thought u were going out this morning" Heeseung asked eyes not leaving ur face wondering what kind of excuse u'll make after he woke up to ur moans and you could feel ur cheeks heating up remembering the events that took place just few hours ago, u cleared ur throat shaking ur head "i changed my mind" u replied trying to avoid eye contact and laughing awkwardly afterwards, Heeseung grinned nodding his head pretending to believe u "Ahhh i see" he said. Joy's eyes roamed on the table "Where is Siyeon?" she asked particularly no one and Jay answered "She still have things to do at her house but she'll be back this afternoon"
"Where is Jake?" Sunghoon asked after a while and Jay was the one to answer him again "He left few minutes they called him from work"
U nodded, it was obvious that he didn't want anyone to find out, "How did u sleep last night?" Heeseung asked u and Jay chocked on his drink while you almost spit your food, Sunghoon who was taking a sip of his tea was now coughing loudly, Joy turned to look at him her eyebrows raised "are u ok?" She asked and he gave her a thumbs up eyes watering, Heeseung was laughing at the reaction of everyone his eyes meeting with yours and you could feel the heat on ur cheeks. "Oh my god u look like a tomato" he commented still laughing and u kicked his leg with ur feet under the table so embarrassed wishing that a black hole could swallow u and take u away from this place.
Sunghoon was now smirking loving to see u in that state remembering meeting with you yesterday when u were about to head to ur room after getting out of Jay's room sweating, face flushed and lips swollen ur robe closed messily and ur hair was in a very terrible state, u stopped at ur steps upon noticing his shadow turning to see him in front of you and u really tried to act normal but there was no point of that at that rate, so u just decided to do what u do everytime = running to ur room and die from shame! u hated that it's Sunghoon who caught u all the time and u weren't sure that u'd be able to look at him the next day but u managed to do that somehow. The table went silent again until Heeseung spoke again "i was just asking cuz it was too cold yesterday and the heating system wasn't working for me so i went to ask u if it works for u but u wasn't in ur room"
"Ahh yes" u lied "i was probably in the kitchen i got so thirsty and i didn't bring water to my room before sleeping" u mumbled, ur words beating u making Sunghoon laugh again impressed by ur ability to lie that fast. Heeseung and Jay were grinning knowingly, Joy didn't seem to understand the whole situation but she shrugged continuing what she was doing on her phone. U finished eating not daring to lift ur head again rushing to clean the table and do the dishes and u almost tripped, ur legs still sore from earlier if it wasn't for Sunghoon who catched u his hands around your waist holding you close, he chuckled his lips next to your ear his hot breath tickling you "are u still thirsty?" he whispered making u push him away chewing on ur lips, he chuckled again "just kidding watch out ur steps" he said tickling ur chin and leaving, making u freeze on ur spot questioning wtf was that about before walking out to the kitchen.
Jay followed u the thought of u doing the dishes while obviously looking tired not clicking with him, he insisted to do them instead asking u to have a rest in ur room, u sighed defeated and went back to the living room not wanting to spend ur time alone knowing that u'll just gonna be having unnecessary thoughts so u hopped on the couch laying there next to Joy who was watching some random insta reels and she smiled creating more space for you "what are u watching?" u asked her softly, Joy positioned her phone to match it with ur sight "just some reels" and u nodded watching videos with her while talking about some random stuff, u sighed the mic on ur back making u uncomfortable, "u should sit in the middle" Joy suggested but u shook your head "it's fine" you replied and Joy frowned not satisfied but she didn't say anything.
After some minutes Sunghoon walked to the living room sitting accross from you, his eyes not leaving ur body and u tried not to meet his gaze, his stare was so intense and intimidating and u wished he ignored u like earlier, "y/n" he called your name and ur heart skipped a beat it was probably the first time u heard ur name skip his lips, Joy looked at him raising her eyebrow but watching ur interaction quietly "yes?" u answered voice almost unheard and Sunghoon smiled, he loves when ur all shy and awkward with him, he cleared his throat before speaking "u wanna go on a date with me?" he asked u making ur eyes widen u certainly was not expecting this from him especially and u were wondering for a second if u've heard him correctly "uh?" u managed to let out and Joy couldn't stop herself from giggling next to you, Sunghoon didn't lose his charming smile making ur insides melt not even bothering to repeat his question, u looked at Joy for help, this situation almost awkward, she was smiling at you encouraging you to give him an answer, "umm... sure" u said after some moments, Sunghoon was waiting patiently and he seemed happy with your reply and Joy clapped her hands excitedly "great then it's settled" she said and u could feel yourself drowning, not knowing what to do and what to expect ur face as red as Joy's phone case ur eyes still looking at Sunghoon who didn't drop his smile now smirking at u, his eyes so intense making u question ur respond "i hope i don't regret that" u mumbled only for u to hear.
This part has been sitting in my drafts for a long time sorry :( but yeah this was not how i wrote this part originally nd it really sucks that i didn't save it but yeah hope u enjoy ^^ the next part is gonna be super intense, spoiler: it'll be both Sunghoon and Heeseung focused and oh god this duo is a lot!
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profundcherrylady · 9 days ago
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SINGLE DAD!SAE ITOSHI
A/N: Idk how many of these I'm gonna make but the next one is gonna be craaaazy. You can check the last one here
Warnings: None. It's really short y'all I'm sorry for that, I'll do better next time 😔
Contents: Sae being awkward, ooc Rin at the beginning. Fluff because this is what it's all about.
Description: Sae gets home from a long trip and worries he might not be spending enough time with his daughter when he sees her getting along with Rin.
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Sae struggled, as he always did, to open the front door. He didn't know why but it just stuck sometimes during the winter. The cold, he guesses; regardless it was still annoying. He got inside the apartment, luggage being pulled from behind him inside as well, and he closed the door quickly before taking off his shoes. As soon as he was in, his ears were filled with the sound of his daughter's giggling, so he finished setting aside his coat to walk around the corner into the living room.
"I'm home." for the first time ever, Mao didn't run to his arms as she usually did whenever he got home. She was too distracted playing with Rin, apparently, because she didn't even notice his presence or heard his voice. He watched as Rin wore some kind of puppet on his hand with a poor dinosaur shape, sitting at the ground yet seemingly having fun with his niece. She was containing her laugh, jumping in her place as she tried to express her thoughts on words.
"Do it again, do it again!!" she exclaimed. Rin let out a huff before responding.
"I don't think so, it's late and- hey, watch out, the dinosaur is going to eat you!" he aimed his hand to her neck as if the dinosaur was eating her. He wasn't being agressive, it was literally just him tickling her and making pretend dinosaur sounds to make it look like she was actually being eaten, yet she started rolling on the ground, laughing uncontrollably at the game.
"Again, again!!!"
"I'm home." Sae repeated, succeeding in gaining their attention. Mao stopped laughing as she spotted him, but even though she seemed happy, she wasn't as eager to jump and hug him like she always was. This was strange.
"Hi, papa!"
"Seems like that's my cue. I'm outta here." the younger Itoshi took off the dinosaur puppet and set it aside, making Mao do a little disappointed sound at the knowledge that he had to go while he stood up.
"Awwww, can you stay a little more?"
"Sorry kid, I have to go. I'll see you next time your dad decides to abandon you, though."
"Don't tell her that." Rin just shrugged, dismissing his brother's words as he walked out.
Now Sae felt a little weird. His daughter had this really sad face watching his brother go and she didn't even seem interested in the fact that he was back after being away for three weeks. Weeks. Like, what was up with her today? She was so attached to him normally; she literally begged to sleep in his room to feel near him and now she wasn't even looking at him. He saw Mao wave at her uncle as he left and then, FINALLY, look at him. But the words that came out of her mouth almost sent him into a coma.
"When are you gonna abandon me next?"
"What?" he almost choked as he answered. "I've never abandoned you, you know that. I travel for buisness; not because I don't want to be with you."
"Okay, but when are you going away?"
"Why are you asking me to go away?"
"So uncle Rin can come over again!" Sae was absolutely baffled; he could not believe what his ears were telling him. Was he away that much? Was he not spending enough time with his daughter? Was he leaving her alone so much that she started getting used to his absence? Absolutely not. He had to fix this at once.
He knelt down to her level and looked straight into her eyes, "Mao sweetie, there's no need to look so sad. I'm here, you know? I can be just as fun as your uncle. What do you say we play together?"
"Isn't it my bedtime now?" True. His flight did land pretty late, it was always like that. He would arrive late and come home to scold his daughter about staying up past her bedtime, but he couldn't care any less about it at the moment.
"Well, lucky you; you have a special permission to stay up late today. Now come on, let's play."
"What are we playing?"
"Um... let's see..." he looked around to find something that could be entertaining, and picked up the dinosaur puppet Rin was using earlier. "This. I can continue with... whatever game Rin was playing with you. What is it about?"
"It's dinosaur attack! The dinosaur has to attack me."
"Why?"
"That's how the game works!" he watched as his daughter made him put on the puppet on his hand, so he sat on the ground.
"But... what is the purpose of the dinosaur attacking you?"
"It's fun!"
"I can't see how it is..." he didn't really understand it, but if it would make her happy then he could give it a try. If Rin did it, how hard could it be? "Alright... here I go then."
"Papa! Dinosaurs don't tell when they're about to attack! It has to be a surprise!"
"Right. Right..." so confusing. This game had literally no meaning or purpose; how did his daughter enjoy it?
He gave it a try and pretended to attack with the puppet, but it was a rather soft attack. He couldn't help it; he just felt the need to be soft. Taking the risk of hurting her would kill him... but now he was killing her out of boredom.
"Papaaaaaa! You're supposed to make the dinosaur noises!"
"What dinosaur noises?"
"Like 'raaaaawwwwr!!' Uncle Rin always does it! And then he makes munch sounds like the dinosaur is eating me."
"Stop comparing me with your uncle, please." this was getting ridiculous. Not only was he failing completely at bonding with his daughter, but she just kept talking about how much fun Rin was. Since when was his brother good with kids anyway? Sae thought he hated children.
He then saw his daughter huff and puff her cheeks in a disappointed manner. "Nevermimd... you don't know how to play this game right, papa. You're so bad at it."
...Bad? Him? Bad at something?
Even worse, bad at spending time with his own daughter.
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves; we'll try a different game." he then proceeded to take off the puppet from his hand. "What else do you wanna play?"
"Can I play princess?"
"I don't see why not." in fact, playing princess sounded a lot easier than whatever the hell Rin was playing with her earlier. How could playing princess go wrong?
"Papa, wear the tiara!" he froze, the words stuck in his throat as he struggled to find an answer. Sae did not expect her to want HIM to be the princess.
"You don't want to be the princess, honey? I think you'd do a much better job than me at that." he tried to gently coax her out of this decision. Now, don't come at him; it's not like he feels that his masculinity is being threatened if he wears a tiara, he couldn't care less. But it was still a little embarrassing, as he had never played the rol of a princess before and he didn't have any idea of how to do it. However, it was all for naught, as he saw his daughter shaking her head.
"No, you be the princess! I'll rescue you!"
"Is it really what you want? Wouldn't you rather be a pretty princess?"
"No, I wanna be the hero! I'm gonna rescue you, papa!" and how could he say no to those sparkling little eyes?
He sighed. "Alright... rescue me then." he finally took the shiny tiara and put it on his head a little awkwardly, while Mao ran around looking for something to use as a pretend sword, then settling for a cardboard tube that was left in the counter from the kitchen towels.
He kept a close eye on her, just ensuring she wasn't doing anything dangerous, until she came back and scattered around some pillows and plushies from her room. A little part of him cringed at the situation and the mess his daughter was making in the living room, knowing he would have to clean it later (or tomorrow), but he wasn't about to scold her when he was trying to spend quality time with her.
"All set!" she finally announced. "Obstacles and enemies!"
And he didn't really need to do anything either, he just sat there on the ground while Mao jumped, ran and played away all her energy pretending to rescue the princess (him). He saw her pretend to struggle, almost giggled at her uncoordinated movements and play-pretend, sighed 'impatiently' as he waited to be 'rescued' and struggled to hold back from helping her everytime she almost fell. Then after what felt like an eternity, she finally got to him, smile wide and beaming excitement at achieving her goal. And he smiled at her too, because maybe this was what parenting was about. Even when busy, just spending a few more minutes awake and pushing her bedtime a little bit later could make both of their days and mantain a healthy bond between them.
"You made it."
"I'm here to rescue you, papa! I mean, princess! I've come to save you from... the evil dinosaur!" she took that same puppet dinosaur once again and beat the hell out of it with her fake sword, and Sae had to retain his laugh.
"Okay, I think he's dead now."
"Now you're free!" she continued to celebrate, but it was clear now that she was pretty tired. It was past her bedtime and she has played like there was no tomorrow, so she let out a little yawn.
"Thank you for rescuing me." he carefully picked her on his arms and stood up, noticing her almost passing out from exhaustion, dropping the toys from her hands and getting hugging him back as she yawned once again. "Now, I think this little hero needs her rest after such an adventurous mission. Let's just get you to bed." Sae shifted her a little so he could take off the tiara and place it on the coffee table (for now), then walked towards the little girl's room. She was fast asleep now, breathing steady and calm as he carried her across the hallway and opened the door to her room. Once she was settled safely into bed, he took a last glance at her before going out to sleep himslef.
He should spend more time with her, take her with him to more places. Not only because he was feeling guilty that he may not be around enough, but because sometimes he was so busy with his tight schedule that he had the bad habit of forgetting. He forgot how much he loves being a father, and every second he spent with her seeing her smile and hearing her laughter and doing the childish stuff she does, he remembers. So yes, he should spend more time with his daughter. To make sure he never forgets his reasons to keep going.
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luvyeni · 2 years ago
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Can we get some more 9th member x skz talk? maybe some pervy action with that topic too. like feeling her up during lives or in the studio. idk sumn like that.
perv!ot8 skz x 9th female member
perv!ot8 who tells you that you don't have to leave the room to change into your music show outfit , "we promise we won't look." but the moment you turn around they're all opening their eyes taking a peak.
perv!chan who invites you to be a guest on chans room and touches you through your panties, you let out a whine but cover it up saying you have a headache and the comments are going crazy about how he's so attentive towards you thinking he's whispering in your ear if you're okay or something when in reality it's something totally different. "do you want them to know you're a naughty girl letting me touch you like this?"
perv!minho who tells you to come to the dance studio so he could help you fix your mistakes in the choreo before the comeback , eyeing you up and down when you come in with your leggings and sports bra. his hands are constantly going down, grabbing your ass, when you shyly push his hand away, he flips it on you. "why are you trying to rile me up then , you aren't slick."
perv!changbin who agrees to help you record your skz-player , meeting you in the studio alone, you're in the little box for a while , getting ready to give up because changbin keeps telling you to do it over , "does that sound good." you almost start to cry he says "not yet , do it one more time." you whine , doing what you're told , what you don't notice is changing fisting his cock to your voice.
perv!hyunjin who begs you to do a dance with him , and picks the dirtiest song that he could , saying "it's just a dance , we're professionals." but nothing about what he's about to do is professional, grabbing your waist , pulling you flush against his hardening cock , groaning into your ear , coping a feel of your boobs when he goes to do a specific move. "you're lucky that camera is there."
perv!han who tells you to sit in his lap while you're in the studio writing a song together claiming "because i'll work better if you're really close to me." , but you can barely get any lyrics down because because he's too busy rutting his hips against your ass. "j...jisung what are you doing?" "nothing love , keep writing your lyrics , this needs to be done today."
perv!felix pulls you into his lap when you complain about having to sit on the floor , "there now you don't have to." smirking at your flustered state. "they're asking if you're sick, you're a little red." he read the comment, "are you sick?" he bit back a smirk as you tried to explain that you are a little sick, but he knows you're lying , he knows it's because he's grinding his hard cock against you, whispering in your ear. "good girl."
perv!seugmin who agrees to help you with your vocals , meeting you in the dance room, "minnie we've been doing the same thing for hours, my throat hurts." he is so sick of your complaining. "come here." he sits unbuckling his pants , your flustered state making his cock harder , "get on your knees , i'll really make your throat hurt."
perv!jeongin who corners you in the unoccupied area of the music bank hallway , your outfit showed a lot more skin than normal and jeongin couldn't hold himself back anymore , "i..innie." you pushed at his chest, looking around to see if anyone was looking "that skirt is so fucking short." he pushed your thighs apart , his hand finding it's way into your safety shorts. "so messy, gonna cum right before you go on stage."
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bambi-kinos · 2 months ago
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Would you like to answer a few questions about you opinions about Paul. Peoples read him very different and of course as a human he too has good and bad sides. What are the things that stands out to you the most: pros and cons besides being icon and music genius. Not from beatle historians or anyone else's opinions just your personal views? In the Beatles, pre and post Beatles. How do you view him today vs from decades ago? (Don't know how long you've been a fan) do you think he's mostly happy or sad in private. I'm asking you this because to me you seem like the one on line blogger that seem to "get him". Also would you say that you are attracted to him? Have you seen him live? What are you favourite songs by him both as a Beatle and beyond. I'm a super-Paul-stan fan and proud of it and nothing you say can change my own opinions of Paul but because nobody is perfect. Ok I'll let you go now.
Had to think about this one for a couple of weeks.
My opinion about Paul is that most of positive and negative feelings towards him are earned. He deserves the reverence but sometimes people take it too far like when his stepsister Ruth called him a god with feet of clay or whatever lmao. That kind of behavior is incredibly cringe and its very embarrassing that people can talk that way about Paul. But I think that he's busted his ass for over 60 years so truthfully he's earned the accolades and praise that he gets. There are some people that get really pissy and mad that he's revered so much and the only thing that we can say to them is "get a fucking life." Paul McCartney has been working his shapely ass off for decades to get where he is and is still slamming out music at in his fucking 80s. When you accomplish half as much as he has than you can think about whining that he's too revered and too worshipped.
On the other hand Paul has done a good job of earning all the negative emotions directed at him. He's egotistical and isn't graceful about wearing that praise. He tries to pretend he doesn't care but it's so transparent and see through that it's actively irritating, I think it's this more than anything that can get people to bitch. There is a phony veneer to Paul where he's clearly doing a bit of some sort and it's aggravating because it's not entirely clear what the bit actually is. Like all the posts making fun of him for pretending to be """normal""" are not coming out of no where, it's real aggravation that he's worked his whole life to get where he is and he tries to go "heehee I don't actually want it I'm just a guy like you <3~" like cmon dude really. For fuck's sake.
When it comes to Paul himself, my take on him, idk. I identify with Paul heavily. I like to think I'm more aggressive than he is but who actually fucking knows. I went through a life changing trauma at a similar age. (I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes when I was eleven years old which is the insulin dependent diabetes that you hear about a lot on social media. BTW if anyone else has diabetes type 1 or 2 I'm available to talk, my dad and my partner are both type 2 and I know a lot about both.) I can identify with how your life is heavily bifurcated between Before and After. I also identify with how Paul really struggles to come to grips with his family life, while it's clear Jim and Mary did love him a lot they also simply were not stellar parents and a lot of their success with Paul and Mike lies in the fact that they gave their sons a steady home life without chaotic disruptions more than that they navigated the trials of parenthood well. I identify with that as well because diabetes makes my life very chaotic, and my parents did work to smooth those things over; but on the other hand my folks also had nasty and ugly moments with me just like Jim did with Paul. So I know what its like to love your parent immensely and be loved by them and still have a deeply resentful and distrustful relationship with them. And I never had a John Lennon in the mix to disrupt things.
I think it left me and Paul in similar places though our birth order is reversed with him being the oldest and me being the youngest. I realized a long time ago that I was completely on my own in terms of my diabetes and the rest of my life (my mother made some treatment decisions about my diabetes that nearly killed me a few times before I took control of it completely.) A parent can love you immensely, try to do everything right, and still damage you profoundly. With Paul having to endure physical blows and attempted emotional manipulation from his father, I think he too realized that he was totally on his own and that Jim could not give Paul what he needed. That is why Paul has such a strong self preservation instinct and why he comes off as two faced and why MLH remarked that he did not want to be in a dark alley with Paul if Paul did not like him. I've had to do some nasty things for self preservation and I think Paul has had to do it too. Some of them we know about but the majority we never will.
I think that it's hard to be the first born or the last born kid. You get so much of your parents attention but they screw you up in so many ways. I know middle children tend to feel ignored but I'm going to tell you right now, you're being shielded from a lot because you're not getting the Eye of Morder trained on you. Maybe we should all be thankful for what we have, idk. I have a lot more in common with my oldest sister than any of my middle siblings.
Paul is ruthlessly out for himself. I think John dying actually changed that a bit, it made him somewhat less vindictive and he was more open to letting people in but he's never not going to protect himself first. Or else he wouldn't have married Nancy in the first place, Nancy's first cousin was Barbara Walters and through Nancy Paul has a direct line to the news media which means he has yet one more string of influence so that he can control his public image. Nancy and Paul like each other a lot and their relationship is sincere, but Paul also benefits greatly by it. Do you see how this goes with him lol, he can invest in sincere relationships (and to be clear he does love Nancy) while still benefitting from it materially and immaterially. Note that a lot of the negative stuff about Paul started fading out of the press after he married Nancy.
Other fans often think I'm being negative and hateful about Paul when I point out that he is a manipulator and that he has a ruthless streak in him but that can't be farther from the truth. I sincerely admire Paul's ability to arrange his life in such a way that he is safe from most tangible threats and that he has such a way of moving chess pieces so that his hand isn't visible. I find that a great deal more admirable and amazing than John's bluntforce "let me squawk like a chicken to a reporter and they'll shit on Paul for me because I took a photo with them" thing. John was very blunt and clumsy with his sledgehammer and that did get results but I think that Paul is a great deal more artistic and beautiful with his media manipulation. The fact that he can carefully line up his pieces, get the results he wants, and then his influence is never seen (unless you extrapolate your way backwards from the results) is, to me, a great deal more elegant and sophisticated than the Lennono approach to bloviating during interviews.
Paul learned this during the initial Beatlemania rush when he had scads of heterosexual men all on their hands and knees begging him to let them fuck him. He does things exclusively through dangling something people want in front of them and then lets them take a course of action that suits him. And despite the fact that he is the architect of these movements you can never trace anything back to him because he does everything through influence and suggestion, not by out and out coercion or bribery. It's actually kind of incredible. Last week my friend remarked "I think Paul could pull off a bank heist and never get caught" and she's right.
That's what I admire about Paul. That is what I think is beautiful about him. Not necessarily the music or the lyrics or the insane life. Just the fact that he is a very patient and careful human being that doesn't lose his cool easily. I want to know more about him because I want that, you know? Being able to control facets of my life with that much care and harmony.
But that wasn't always the case. Paul was very clumsy during the 1970s because he let his feelings rule him when he should have crushed John like a bug. It wasn't until after John died that Paul started building the fortress, that was when he finally realized "oh shit, I need to build a persona for PR. I can't just be me anymore." Wings Paul is in some ways the most honest Paul, he vomits his feelings everywhere and we get a lot of insights into his mind and home life. That was before he had formed his own network of influence and political chicanry. 1980s Paul is when he's investing in that network finally and then 1990s Paul is when he started putting it into motion culminating in the divorce with Heather Mills. All in all I find it fascinating that Paul was not able to pull these disparate parts of himself together until he was in his 40s and Linda died. What is to be done with such a man?
I think that Paul has always had disparate parts of himself that he hasn't been able to reconcile. This is of course not unusual, it is the work of our lifetimes that we must see, accept, and internalize our contradictory natures. It's Paul's bad luck that he has to do this all in the public eye. No one envies him that. It's hell on earth and my heart breaks for him sometimes.
When it comes to Paul's moods in private, I think he is more or less "happy." Paul himself has said that he doesn't overthink his actions, he just decides what he wants to do and does it and whether it pans out or not is a different matter. I think that he's the kind of person that doesn't ruminate and he doesn't overthink what he's doing. And if he does do that then he goes to his guitar and does the "tell it all my problems" thing which is actually music therapy. It clearly helps him a lot and it clears his head so that he can keep his problems in perspective. I do that with journaling and my common place book, and I should do it more. It clearly helps Paul which is a good habit to have. All in all during his day to day life, Paul is happy and accomplished and has a big family with lots of grandchildren. Clearly loves Beatrice to bits and would do anything for her. The fact that we never hear anything bad about Beatrice is proof that she inherited all the right things from Paul lmao, she knows better than to get in trouble. Interestingly I think Beatrice is Paul's mini-me and considering Heather Mills is the same kind of personality as John Lennon, it makes me think that John and Paul having children together would actually have worked out very well for them.
On the other hand we know that Paul carries his share of anger and bitterness and old grudges. "No one knows the real me, do they." We're lucky that we live in a time where we can be relatively open about our personalities as well as our wants and needs. Paul did not grow up with such privileges and is only just recently starting to feel his way to the place we have inhabited our entire lives. He's suffered greatly for it. He's a naturally reticent person but I think John Lennon is the only person in the world Paul could fully express himself with; even Linda did not get full access to Paul considering comments made by others about Paul's controlling nature which belies anxiety. Why was Paul anxious around Linda, his soul mate? Because there were still parts of himself he didn't want her to know. And so on.
I think that in some ways Paul's lack of rumination and cheeriness is a choice that he's made for himself. He's been "tired" of negativity and hurtfulness for pretty much his entire life, he's always wanted to bring light into the world. John once said that Yoko painting "yes" on the ceiling of her exhibit was what he liked about her because it was positive, unlike the self absorbed 'woe is me' bullshit exhibits other avante garde people put up. I think John was attracted to Paul for similar reasons. Paul tries to take the sad song and make it better. Paul transformed John's life and he saved John from a much harder and painful path like the common belief that John would have landed himself in prison if he hadn't met Paul. I don't think it would have happened precisely that way but it was certainly a distinct possibility that John was aware of and he knew that Paul saved him from it.
Paul does it for himself as much as anyone else. I think he's actively trying to avoid the traps that many of us fall into. Rumination, bitterness, regrets. These are things that poison a person's life and even without therapeutic language Paul realized that he didn't want his life to be consumed by it. That doesn't mean he doesn't have his well of pain to tap into but he wants to live and be happy. He said once that John wouldn't want him to be hurt and depressed and he was right. I think if we all approached our lives with that kind of attitude, "I deserve to be happy and I'm going to do what it takes to get there," we would all be much better off. Paul is a role model in more ways than one.
Paul is a sport, a one off. There is no one else like him and when he dies there will never be anyone like him ever again. Treasure him now while he is here.
I have never seen him perform. When he has his next US tour then I'll go, I don't care what it costs.
Am I attracted to him: yes and yes. I find it more like an aspirational attractiveness but I think he's intensely beautiful and he became more beautiful as he aged (though there is something very special and breedable about 22 year old Paul McCartney. It's deeply depressing that he never got pregnant.) That's different from being handsome, all of the Beatles were handsome but Paul is intensely beautiful. It's the kind of thing that gets memorialized in Sumarian poems. If we were told he was descended from swan maidens or something like that, it would not be a shock. There's a story in that somewhere lol, imagine Paul bathing in a lake and John steals his feathered coat so that Paul will marry him or something like that. IDK. Paul is very intense.
Beauty is sovereign. Beauty triumphs over all things. Paul is one of those rare people that handles (almost) all of his affairs adroitly. Every little thing he does is magic.
I'm a big fan of all of Paul's work, I genuinely enjoy London Town for instance and I don't get why some circles make fun of it. Synth owns what is the problem here. Some of my favorite Paul songs:
With a Little Luck
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Probably my favorite "John, I love you, I'm sorry, please come home" song. It's just very Paul, the very carefully arranged harmony, the minor key in an upbeat tempo, with the almost mismatched lyrics before Paul brings it back to a major key resolution. It makes me want to find my partner and kiss them on their lower lip. (My partner has a very pouty lower lip, easily one of their best features.)
Let 'em In
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I have an entire animated music video in my head about this song. I've actually been looking up how to teach myself art because I want to pursue it. First learning to draw, then learning to animate and all because I want to animate this sequence I have in my head. Oh Paul. I adore you.
Rock Show
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This one actually made me stand up and dance around my house which never happens anymore. I just love the energy and Paul's silly voices. And Paul's platonic fascination with axe wielders rears its head again! I wonder if Paul ever fantasized about killing people with an axe.
Another Day
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This is the anthem of my life lmao. At least I have a romantic partner but we're long distance until I can emigrate to the United Kingdom so again I identify very heavily with this Paul piece. Ahhh…
When it comes to Paul's Beatle work, I don't really want to reference anything there because Beatles music was such a community effort, even Paul's songs aren't fully his once the other three got their hands on it. That's not a bad thing but it does mean the Beatles were an engine unto themselves. Paul never had full control of his songs. My choices are not particularly enlightened but they are true which is all I can provide.
This was a really great ask to get, thank you for sending it in. Very flattered if I'm someone who "gets" Paul. I think it's more like he makes a lot of sense to me and it's very rare that he does something that does not make sense to me. I'm probably projecting a lot but we all do that so who cares?
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dan-the-womans-blog · 6 months ago
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hi! could you possibly write some spencer hurt/comfort? (it’s what i live and breath for) maybe reader has started a new job, and had a rough day, so when Spencer arrives home, he immediately picks up on the signs. they’re in bed, not feeling good, dreading the next day, but Spencer comforts them and eventually flips their mood around, so they aren’t thinking of work in such a negative light.
i tried to use gn pronouns cause idk what readers you write for. so if you wanna do this, could it mb be fem or gn? whichever you’re most comfy with. thank you! and no pressure to get this done x
You're so considerate, thank you!!!! I prefer female readers, however if requested i can do any. Ig not specified then the default will be fem, but most can be read as gn. Hope you enjoy, i rushed it a bit😅😁😘
Title: When Comfort Finds You
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As the sun set, casting a warm, golden hue over the apartment, you lay in bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. The day had been long and arduous, your first at a new job. It wasn’t just the workload or the unfamiliar faces that weighed heavily on your mind; it was the feeling of inadequacy that had seeped into your bones, making you question every step you took, every word you uttered.
The sound of the front door creaking open broke the silence. You knew it was Spencer. His work hours were long and unpredictable, but you had come to recognize the subtle cues that signaled his return: the soft shuffle of his shoes, the quiet click of the door, the faint scent of old books and coffee that seemed to follow him everywhere.
“Hey,” Spencer called out, his voice gentle but laced with concern. He had a knack for sensing when something was off, and tonight was no exception. You heard him set his bag down and make his way to the bedroom.
You didn't move, hoping to avoid the inevitable conversation about your day. But Spencer, perceptive as always, wasn’t deterred by your lack of response. He stepped into the room, his eyes immediately finding your form curled up on the bed.
“Rough day?” he asked softly, sitting down on the edge of the bed. He reached out, brushing a strand of hair away from your face. His touch was tender, his eyes filled with empathy.
You nodded, a lump forming in your throat. You had wanted to be strong, to handle the new job without crumbling under the pressure, but today had proven to be too much. “It’s just… so hard,” you whispered, your voice breaking.
Spencer’s brow furrowed as he listened. He had always been a great listener, his ability to empathize unmatched. “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked, his hand resting on your shoulder, offering comfort.
You hesitated for a moment, then sighed. “I just feel like I don’t belong there. Everyone is so confident, so sure of themselves, and I… I just feel like I’m floundering.”
Spencer nodded, his expression thoughtful. “Starting a new job is always tough,” he said softly. “It’s normal to feel out of place at first. But that doesn’t mean you don’t belong. It just means you’re human.”
You couldn’t help but smile a little at his words, appreciating his attempt to lighten the mood. “I made so many mistakes today,” you admitted, the weight of the day’s failures pressing down on you.
Spencer’s grip on your shoulder tightened slightly, a gesture of reassurance. “Everyone makes mistakes,” he said firmly. “Even me. Remember when I first joined the BAU? I made a ton of mistakes. But that’s how we learn. That’s how we get better.”
You nodded, taking some comfort in his words. Spencer had faced his own share of challenges and had come out stronger. Maybe you could too. But the doubt still lingered, gnawing at your confidence.
Spencer seemed to sense your lingering unease. “Do you want to know what I think?” he asked, his tone gentle but insistent.
“What?” you asked, looking up at him, seeking the reassurance you desperately needed.
“I think you’re amazing,” he said simply. “You’re smart, capable, and incredibly strong. And I know that, given time, you’ll find your footing at this new job. It’s just the first day. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed. But don’t let today define your entire experience.”
Tears welled up in your eyes at his words. You had been so caught up in your own self-doubt that you hadn’t allowed yourself to see the bigger picture. “Thank you,” you whispered, your voice choked with emotion.
Spencer leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. “You’re welcome,” he murmured. “And remember, I’m here for you. Always.”
You took a deep breath, feeling a sense of calm wash over you. Spencer’s presence, his unwavering support, was exactly what you needed. “I don’t know what I’d do without you,” you said, a small smile tugging at your lips.
He smiled back, his eyes twinkling with affection. “You’d be just fine,” he said. “But I’m glad I get to be here for you. Now, how about we do something to take your mind off work for a while?”
You nodded eagerly, grateful for the distraction. “What did you have in mind?”
Spencer’s smile widened. “How about a movie? Something light and fun. Or we could read together. Whatever you want.”
“A movie sounds nice,” you said, feeling a bit of the day’s weight lift off your shoulders.
Spencer stood up and headed to the living room, you following closely behind. He picked out a classic comedy, something you both loved, and soon you were curled up on the couch together, the comforting sounds of laughter filling the room.
As the movie played, you felt your anxiety slowly dissipate. Spencer’s arm around you, his presence grounding you, made everything seem a little less daunting. You knew tomorrow would bring its own challenges, but for now, you allowed yourself to relax, to enjoy the moment.
By the time the movie ended, you felt lighter, your mind no longer consumed by the day’s events. Spencer turned to you, a satisfied smile on his face. “Feeling better?”
“Much,” you admitted, leaning into him. “Thank you, Spencer. I really needed this.”
“Anytime,” he said softly, kissing the top of your head. “And remember, you’re going to do great. Just take it one day at a time.”
You nodded, feeling a renewed sense of hope. With Spencer by your side, you knew you could face whatever challenges lay ahead. And as you drifted off to sleep that night, you felt a sense of peace, knowing that no matter what, you weren’t alone.
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cure-typhoon · 1 year ago
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please please please talk more about the beta troll’s friendship 🙏
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You have summoned me in my favorite subject: 🎉🎉🎉🎉 FRIENDSHIP!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉 Take a sit because this is going to be long, so long i may end up dividing into different posts!
Okey so sadly we don't have a lot of info of the full group dynamic besides some clues and what we know is them literally at their worst thinking they we're going to die in a meteor,after a full one month campaign in the game they had won yet was taken from them being chased by an undefeatable enemy that destroyed their planets and probably their lusus too. And at the end three of them going on a rampage and killing the rest of the team
So not the most reliable info of how their normal dynamic as a friendgroup would be, but tbh it could never be "healthy friendgroup" in a human sense because, well, they live in Alternia.
But even in hell, the flower of friendship can blossom, so lets talk about the fucked up friendship between these kids:
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We know little about how their friendship started, contrary with the Beta Kids that we know because of June's birthday presente for Jade arriving in the past to young Jade with her pesterchum and her probably looking at the clouds in Prospit and seeing there the pesterchum of Rose and Dave following suit
Because the Beta Trolls are a much bigger group and we dont really know if they actually celebrate their wriggling days, as none of the trolls mentioned it but it could also be in part because of Karkat's disdain for the celebration or them maybe not knowing because he is a very private kid after all
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Maybe Kanaya was the first troll that befriended all of them, like Jade was and both of them being the assigned Space player of their group and the first ones to wake in Prospit, but i also doubt that considered she didnt went through the birthday gift shenanigan that young Jade went through
So what most likely happened: The trolls who we're closest to eachother (Equius and Vriska, Eridan and Feferi, Aradia and Tavros, Terezi and Vriska* (not totally sure about that one) and maybe Sollux and Aradia/Feferi) befriended eachother first and meet the rest (Karkat, Nepeta, Gamzee, Kanaya) online and just shared their info between eachother.
I honestly wonder who thought of the idea of all sharing their Trollian between eachother, maybe Feferi? maybe it just happened overtime? but what matters right now is the
F R I E N D S H I P
So today we will talk about the underrated friendships between the group
Starting with Aradia and Tavros! Both members of Team Charge, i see very few people talk about them as friends even though they were obviously very close considering they we're part of a Flarp campaign together.
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Both seem to match pretty well personality wise, both adventurous and wanting to have fun in the game, Aradia knows that Tavros picked a hard class for himself yet she still encourages him and tries to cheer him on and advice him in the case of Vriska trying to get under his skin.
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When Vriska starts to surrond him, she tries to communicate with her first, but sadly she and terezi where distracted by Doc Scratch, so he gets paralized
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Side note: After Aradia and Terezi, his third option for asking for help is Karkat, which is...interesting, they dont talk a lot but when they do its Tavros trying to get advice/help from him (2 out of 3 convos), so either Karkat and Tavros have more convos besides the ones showed (very likely) or Karkat just having a reputation of helping with issues that he is the first one who comes to Tavros's mind
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also Karkat calling him bro is so fucking funny cdbhd, idk if its sarcasm or if its genuine like with Eridan but he seems worried for a little before going on a rant about how stupid this is, only to come back trying to advice him to do this in private (also he winks at him as GTavrossprite but thats smt for the Tavkat shippers)
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Anyway, back to Aradia, after her death we dont know about their relationship that much, we know that the whole reason that this whole revenge cycle was because Aradia wanted to avenge Tavros
But after her death, we don't know if they talk or if Tavros even knows she is dead, as it was mostly secret that only Sollux, Vriska, Terezi and Equius seem to know,
What we know is that Aradia keeps Tavros close to her heart, as the only reason she didnt straight up kill Vriska is
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Because he was there to see it
And thats all the info we have of their relationship while Aradia was a robot, is more than likely Tavros confronted Vriska (besides creating Bec Noir) because Aradiabot had just exploded and he was blaming her for that too (especulation)
Their post-death/revival shows them having the same relationship pre-aradia's death, after they find eachother in the afterlife
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Theyre big pals :)
Staying with Tavros, another friendship people dont seem to talk a lot about is Kanaya and Tavros, which tbh, we dont have a conversation on screen between them, but we know they talk and Kanaya tries to mediate to help him when Vriska is bullying him
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And also, even after she cut Vriska out because of the whole ''Having a crush on her but finding out she has a crush on Tavros'' (probably because she was sulking) she seems to have a fine relationship with Tavros, as she made a Tinkerbull plushie for him
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To other friendships, Kanaya and Feferi! Another group of trolls with very few coversations, but we can easily tell in those that they cared for eachother
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They have a lot in common, being of the few trolls who woked up in their moons before the game, having a huge responsability as their lusus can either kill or revive their entire civilization, being in a unhappy moiralliagance (with their cases kinda mirroring eachother, with Feferi not wanting to be in any quadrants while Eridan wants to change them, while Kanaya wants to change quadrants while Vriska seems to be fine with where they are) and knowing their lusus were going to die when they were 13
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Feferi and Kanaya seem to have very a similar relationship as Karkat and Eridan, where they advise eachother about their moirals + possible romantic relationships. And their very contrasting personalities helps them balance eachother out
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Feferi is even comfortable enough to invite Kanaya to the horn pile and knowing Kanaya's expressions enough to guess that she is nervous about coming off as meddling with them
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After Feferi gets killed off, Kanaya is already ready to attack, only waiting to see what Eridan is planning to do, attack her first or trying to escape
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If it weren't for Kanaya distracting herself with the matriorb, and Eridan inmediately picking on this opportunity
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To piss her off enough to set her off and attack him first
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So she is an easier target that he can kill her off without a fight
Speaking about this two, next time we will to talk about the complicated (annoying) friendship between these two, why next time? because this post is already getting to fucking long!
Come here for Part 2 -> Here! (when its done this will get updated with a link lol)
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sleepyhutcherson · 11 months ago
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Hi! I have a sweet fluffy and very angsty Mike Schmidt idea, if you'd like it??
Okay, so what if Mike and the reader dated for a good while in highschool? Like, they were childhood best friends, tried dating in highschool, but ultimately decided that it was a classic case of "right person, wrong time"? Like, they genuinely love each other, but when they were teenagers, they just couldn't do it.. I hope that made sense?
Know It’s For The Better
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pairing: mike schmidt x gn!reader
word count: 3.1k words
contains: child bestfriends to lovers to strangers (sorta), “right person, wrong time”, angst, use of y/n, reader works at a cafe, they’re genuinely so in love w each other but it’s just never the right time.
a/n: thank you so much for requesting this anon!! this was so fun to write xx peep the ‘normal people’ and phoebe bridgers references in this. btw maybe this could do a part two but idk.
You lived a quiet—boring, surely—but cosy life at twenty two. You lived alone in a lousy, small flat that you were growing to like more and more everyday as you started shaping it more around your liking. You worked at a small cafe that paid you pretty well, with hours that worked just right for you. You were comfortable at your job, your co-workers were all friendly with each other, you couldn’t complain about your life, even if it was dull.
On your day off your boss had asked you to come in, you agreed but frankly you were a little pissed that you were working on your day off. The cold weather today drew customers away so in a way you couldn’t really complain. You were at the counter, a book in hand that you would occasionally peek up from to glance at the weather from the window. It amused you how only yesterday the sun was shining brightly and now today the sky was threatening to pour, the wind blowing harshly through the trees.
You return your attention to your book, having to re read the passage again. Just then, the bells hanging above the door chime, announcing someone’s arrival. You perk up, closing your book and setting it aside.
You complained about your life lacking entertainment only weeks ago, wishing for some kind of shocker to just happen.
You, however, did not mean for that “shocker” to be Mike Schmidt.
For a second all you can do is stare at him, trying to figure out if you were hallucinating. It was such a rush seeing him—your breath caught, your brows knitted as you tried to make out if it was really him. The last time you saw him he was about eighteen, grasping onto you as he sobbed, precious words being said between you two. But, irritatingly enough, you think you could recognise him anywhere, even after all this time, from merely his appearance, to his hazel eyes you remember getting caught up in, to the familiar black coat he wears even now.
Mike reacts about the same, his eyes widening, the light inside the cafe reflecting on them just perfectly. You almost get trapped into them again.
“Mike,” you breathe out after some time. His name sounds so strange coming out of your mouth.
“Hey,” he replies, tone uncertain. Your eyes trail up to the curls that rest carefully on his head, and you smile. You used to practically beg Mike not to cut his hair, loving the curls that formed whenever he kept it just a little longer than usual. Now he kept them, messily, but still enough to lure your eyes. "How…how are you?" He manages to ask.
Your hands rest on the cool counter in front of you, you can see the way Mike’s eyes land on your hands, longing for touch. “I’m doing good. How have you been?”
“Good.” A simple reply. This all felt weird, seeing each other again after your failed relationship, one neither of you have really moved on from.
Silence. A long, painful silence.
“So, are you going to order something?” You ask, smiling the way you would smile at any other customer because a part of you just wanted to believe he was just another customer. “My boss will scold me if he sees I’m only talking with the only customer we’ve had all day.”
“Right,” Mike looks up at the menu, although he really only came for black coffee. When he looks back at you, his mouth opens, and closes, like he’s debating on what he’s going to say. “I don’t know if you’re busy later but do you want to…catch up? If you’re free, of course.”
You had nothing else to do and you didn’t really have it in you to reject him. “Yeah, okay. I get off in two hours.”
Mike shyly smiles, trying not to be too obvious your agreement meant a lot. “Sounds good,” he says, and then remembers Abby has a school project she’s supposed to work on at home today. “Shit, is it alright if we meet at my place? Abby has this project she needs to work on for school…unless you want to reschedule…”
You can’t help but smile when he mentions Abby, the last time you saw her she was still a baby—about three years old, to be exact. Mike was taking care of her practically full time, you helped with her as much as you could, both of you being constantly mistaken as her parents.
“That’s fine,” you say. He thanks you, throwing in an apology for the inconvenience that you wave off. He writes down his address on a napkin before leaving, not even ordering that black coffee that had drawn him to the small cafe in the first place.
The blue front door makes you question if you have the right address. Compared to every other house in the dull neighbourhood, Mike’s house appeared to be the only one with a colourful door—that is if this was Mike’s place.
You’re proven correct when the front door swings open and Abby, who you recognise almost immediately despite her being much older than the last time you saw her. She smiles widely, but it’s obvious she doesn’t recognise you.
“Hello…” you say, awkwardly. You’re not even sure what to tell her when she asks who you are—a friend of Mike’s? It just sounded odd. You’re saved when Mike appears behind Abby.
“Y/N,” he seems pleased to see you. In fact, Mike is pleased to see you. Honestly, he wasn’t sure you would actually stop by. “Oh—Abby, this is who I was telling you about.” Mike says, and you recognise that gentle, almost innocent tone he always used with Abby.
“Hi,” she greets with a smile, standing by Mike’s side. “Mike hasn’t shut up about you—“ she’s interrupted when Mike looks at her with a more stern expression. “Oh, sorry!” She apologises, giggling—she knew well what she was doing.
“Why don’t you go and continue your project, yeah?” Mike suggests, paying no attention to you anymore, his focus entirely on Abby right now.
“Okay.” Abby agrees, which surprises Mike a little. She says a quick “goodbye” to you before running off to her bedroom.
Mike then looks back at you, cheeks slightly flustered. Don’t ever tell Abby anything ever again he makes a mental note of that. “Come in?”
You don’t know what exactly you expected walking into Mike’s home but you feel somewhat pleased seeing Abby’s drawings displayed everywhere in the house, stuffed animals — a dolphin, two bears, a rabbit, a duck, and even a fox — neatly sitting next to each other on the sofa. The house has such a childlike atmosphere to it that you couldn’t help but smile.
“Do you want something to drink?” Mike asks, looking for something in the fridge.
“Sure, thanks.” You reply, your eyes still ogling Mike’s home.
Surely a lot of the decor had to be Abby’s idea, there was so much colour everywhere; from the pillows, the carpet, a crocheted blanket on the sofa, the little toy figures that were placed on the TV stand. It had to be Abby’s touch, the only colours you ever saw on Mike were dull shades of greys and blues.
You’re pulled away by the sound of Mike setting down two glasses of some kind of soft drink on the table. “Abby’s a talented artist,” you say, sitting down at the table, across from Mike.
A small chuckle escapes Mike’s lips. “Yeah,” he agrees, taking a long sip of his drink as he stares at the drawing you were fixated on. “She’s got a real chance at being someone great in life.”
You both don’t say anything for a minute. Mike dreads the silence that falls between the two of you, trying to think of something to say to fill it.
“She’s grown a ton,” you then say. Seeing Abby brought you back so many memories—the good ones, for there were so many of those with Mike. “Remember that time we took her to the park and she kept trying to eat flowers?” You laugh at the memory, one you haven’t thought about in a while.
Mike smiles upon hearing your laugh. “Yeah. She loves flowers, I mean, of course she doesn’t try to eat them anymore but she’s pretty skilled at painting them.”
“She’s doing good then?” You ask.
Mike nods, his hands wrapped around his glass. “Yeah. She’s doing great. Her birthday’s coming up so she won’t shut up about that.” He says teasingly.
“Oh, how old is she turning?” You ask.
“Eight,” he answers, running his finger around the rim of the glass. He couldn’t sit still being around you, his heart racing, but he tried not to acknowledge it.
“That makes me feel old,” you joke, which actually gets a genuine laugh from Mike.
“Then what does that make me?” He teases, a wide smile on his face that makes your heart flutter. Mike was only one year older than you making him twenty three.
You don’t reply and then it hits you, Mike is twenty three, he’s not eighteen anymore. Of course you knew that, you just never really realised just how long it’s been, how much you’ve missed. It’s been five years since you last saw to him—five birthdays you missed, Abby’s and his.
The atmosphere changes then. A depressing realisation hitting you. Mike wasn’t anyone to you anymore. He was once someone to you, not just your boyfriend but your childhood best friend. But now? He could easily be a stranger.
You take a sip of your drink then, and you can feel Mike’s eyes on you. You could always tell when Mike was staring at you, there was something so different about the way his eyes felt on you compared to anyone else’s.
There’s another dreadful silence then. You force yourself to look at the way the bubbles in your drink rise, the way the ice cubes crash into each other.
“Did you feel ashamed seeing me today after how things ended?” Your head snaps up once hearing Mike’s question. You don’t know what to even think—what to even say! He’s got you in a spot, and now you wonder, did you?
No. You didn’t. You really didn’t. You longed for him for so long, for the memories you shared, the pretty words that were exchanged—the many promises that were said.
“No,” you reply, your hands wrapped around the chill glass, still staring at it like it’s the most interesting thing in the world. “I just…it was difficult seeing you.”
Mike nods even if you can’t see him. “I know,” he replies, and then; “it was hard for me, too.” He says a little more quietly.
You realise how unfair everything is, how you and Mike are being pulled together again all of the sudden after all these years—after it never worked for you two. There was always something pulling you apart when you were dating, a sudden intervening, but you both always tried to make it work. Until, of course, both of you saw it best to end things, that perhaps there was a reason why you were being pulled apart.
The last time you saw Mike he was eighteen, trying to find a job to help provide for Abby, and mourning the sudden absence of his father. It wasn’t a good time for him.
A guilt washes over you because you deserted him the time he needed you most. “I’m so sorry,” you say, finally building up the courage to meet his eyes. Honestly, he had no idea what exactly you were apologising for.
His brows pinch together slightly, his eyes fixed on yours with such focus even if you’re avoiding his. “You don’t have anything to apologise for,” he says, “we both agreed it was…best to end things.” Which was true, the breakup was mutual, one both of you agreed to despite how much it pained both of you.
“I shouldn’t have left you though,” your eyes are sad and Mike can’t bear the way they look.
Mike smiles sadly, reaching across for you hands. They’re cold from the glass, the contact from his hands immediately warming yours up. You don’t pull away from his touch, the sudden touch startles you but you soon relax at the familiarity.
“Maybe it was for the better.” Your heart breaks at his words, the memories that linger within them. The memory of Mike kissing your tears away, whispering “it’s for the better” between each kiss that last time you saw him.
Your eyes shut, and you let your head fall not wanting Mike to see you struggle fighting back tears. The sudden sound of his chair screeching against the tile making your eyes flutter open, and soon Mike is kneeling beside you, looking up at you with his soft, doleful eyes.
“Hey, hey,” he whispers, his tone rather soothing. He tries to meet your eyes but you look away from his knowing that if you do you’ll probably break. “Look at me, baby.” You relent, being manipulated to meet his eyes hearing the intimate nickname.
And for a moment you both just stare into each other’s eyes, Mike’s mouth opening slightly, being enamoured by the sight of you alone. He could live like this—staring up at you, if he could he thinks he would agree to stay like this forever, with you being his only sight.
He stands up and pulls you up with him, his hands resting on your waist holding you still. Holding you tightly, scared to lose you again. “I’ve thought about you everyday since,” he admits in a whisper. You feel a pang of guilt.
“Mike,” you sigh, your hands grasping onto his dark blue zip up tightly, your knuckles turning white.
He doesn’t say anything. His hands move up slowly from your waist, to your arms, to your shoulders, to your neck and finally up to cup your face. It’s such an intense moment, both of you overwhelmed with the touch.
Mike fears that this could be the last time he touches you, he doesn’t know where this will go but with the reputation you both have he isn’t sure this will end well. You know it, too. You know that the universe has spawned Mike back into your life the very moment you’re far too busy for a relationship. You don’t want to address it, you don’t even want to recognise it yourself so you say nothing.
But you both know deep down.
His hands feel warm against your skin, they’re callous but perfect against your cheeks. “I’m here,” you say, “so kiss me.” It comes out more desperate than you would like, but it doesn’t matter, you were desperate, craving what could be a last kiss.
Mike doesn’t hesitate, of course. He pulls you in, gradually, looking at you briefly before he closes his eyes to push his lips against yours. Your body weakens, your heart beating quickly in your chest as the kiss deepens. He makes sure to take his time like he did the last time, kissing you ever so passionately. He wants you to know that in this moment he has everything. That the one thing he has ever lacked in life has finally come back to him even if only briefly.
You can tell that he’s giving you all the control—punishing you to be the one to have to pull away first because if it were up to Mike he would scoop you in and keep you here like this forever if he could. If you’d let him.
Pulling away from the longing, awaited kiss leaves you hungry still. A pathetic moan escapes Mike’s lips when you pull away, as if you’ve just put a dagger through his already maimed heart. You clutch onto his shirt now, looking at his eyes that are growing bigger, sadder.
“No tears this time,” you say, more to yourself, but when you say it a single tear rolls down your cheek. You let out a chuckle, Mike smiles a little too sad for your liking, wiping the tear away with his thumb. But you can feel that threatening knot in your throat. You bury your face into Mike’s chest, his hand going to the back of your head, softly stroking your hair.
You cry into his chest, grasping desperately onto his shirt. Both of you had a strong feeling this would be the last time you would see each other for a while. You sob into his chest, staining his grey shirt with your tears. You were mourning someone who was alive. You felt your body warm up with anger, not at anyone specifically, but because this would always be your ending, the time just never right.
Mike forces himself to look up at the ceiling, forcing back tears. He continues to stroke your hair, letting you cry into his shirt. When you’ve calmed down, he kisses the top of your head before pulling you back to look at you once more.
“We’ll be okay,” he hears himself say.
You nod, wanting to believe him, but by the look on his face he doesn’t seem to believe himself. “Okay,” you say, “I’ll go.”
His hands still cradle your face carefully. “And I’ll stay.” He whispers, a tear escaping.
You grasp his face, a little less gentle than he’s been with you. You pull him closer to you, planting a chaste kiss on his cheek. And then another. And another. And several more. When you’re done you take notice of his curls again, you move up to tangle them in between your fingers, tugging at them just slightly. It makes Mike smile.
“I keep them for you now,” he mumbles. “I know how much you used to love them.”
“I still do.” You whisper, tugging at them one last time before letting them go. You move towards the front door which isn't too far from the dining table and Mike follows.
He grabs your arm before you can open the front door. He turns you to face him, his hands moving up to cradle your face, planting a long, delicate kiss on your forehead. A goodbye kiss. A promising kiss that this doesn’t have to be the last. A kiss that speaks more than he does, telling you he’s always here for you to come back to him. He’ll wait.
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whoisneo404 · 9 months ago
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i have a request if you’re taking them. nick and his bf have been together for a while and are about to have sex for the first time, but bf is nervous because they’re a virgin or just less experienced and it’s all cute but hot at the same time 😏💖
Romantic night.
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Summary: you and (bf) Nick have been together for a while, one night while watching a movie at your house things get side tracked and start to heat up. You have never done anything more than kissing and a bit of touching so you are a bit nervous, lucky you that Nick is here to calm you down and teach you everything he knows.
Tw: nsfw, cursing.
Note: I tried to make neutral body parts so everyone can enjoy this. But idk if it’s the best.
Note 2: reader is bottom.
‘’Come on, pay attention.’’ Nick whines as he points to the screen with one hand, his other hand is resting on my shoulder, we are cuddling n my living as we watch k-12 for the 6th time.
‘’We have seen this movie like 10 times, can’t we watch another?’’ I look at him and he pouts. ‘’All right, we’ll watch I’ll pick the movie we see after.’’ He nods and kisses my cheek.
‘’You know what I have been thinking about recently?’’ he says looking at the screen.
‘’No idea, tell me.’’
‘’I was thinking about how you haven’t kissed me today.’’
‘’What do you mean? I gave you a kiss when you arrived.’’ I lower the volume of the tv a bit and sit facing him, he does the same.
‘’Yeah, but it was on the cheek. You know I need more than that, I need your kisses, kiss me.’’ He says while pouting and laughing at himself.
‘’All right, all right. Come here.’’ I say as I crawl closer to him, sitting on his left leg and grabbing his face with both hands. ‘’God, you are so needy.’’ His arms wrap around my waist and pulls me closer to him.
‘’I am, and you love it.’’
He leans in, giving me pecks on my lips, cheeks and nose, I chuckle and I feel his smile against my skin. I kiss his lips, what started as a romantic and tender kiss turned into a more passionate one, our mouth moving in sync. I feel him adjust himself on the couch, grabbing one of my legs making me sit fully on his lap. My hands are on his chest, caressing it, drawing small figures here and there. His hands wondering from my hips to my thighs, up and down, again and again. The room starts to get hot, filled with the wet sounds of our kisses and the music from the movie that was playing on the background. I feel Nicks hips move, I let out a moan against his lips and surprised by it I back up and cover my red face with both of my hands.
‘’Hey, are you okay?’’ Nick grabs my waist and rubs it to soothe me. I nod. ‘’What happened?’’
‘’I just have never… you know, done it.’’ Nick grabs my hands and pulls them down slowly.
‘’It’s okay, if you don’t want to, we don’t have to do anything.’’
‘’No, I want to. I’m just nervous.’’ I look down at his chest, I see it going up and down unevenly.
‘’That’s normal, love. I’m here, I’ll be as patient and as slow as you need me to.’’ He kisses my cheek. ‘’If you ever want me to stop, just tell me.’’ I nod and he gently lays me down on the couch.
Nick is now on top of me, his one hand on my waist the other on my cheek, kissing me, whispering sweet nothings on my ear.
‘’Can I take your shirt off?’’ I nod, and help him take it off.
He leans in, groping my legs making them wrap around his waist. He kisses me roughly yet lovingly; his hips start grinding and humping against mine. His groans and our moans muffled by our kisses. One of my hands is grabbing his shirt pulling him as close as I can, the other is playing and pulling his hair, I feel myself getting lost in the moment.
‘’I need you.’’
‘’What was that, baby?’’ His voice is low, it sends shivers down my spine. My hips moving with his wanting more friction and pleasure.
‘’Please, I’m ready. I need you Nick, please.’’ My hands are nor covering my blushing face, his face is red too, I see his messy hair and his shirt filled with wrinkles, he looks so hot.
‘’As you wish.’’
Nick takes off my sweatpants, leaving me in only my boxers. I reach out to help him unbuckle his jeans, but he grabs my hands.
‘’Wait, just a second.’’ He stands up and grabs his backpack which was near the coffee table, he searches inside and takes out a pack of condoms, with a blush on his face he speaks. ‘’I… don’t think bad about this, it was Chris, he gave it to me after dropping me off with Matt, and they insisted and I-…’’ he was rambling, I could tell he is very nervous.
‘’Hey, it’s okay. It’s okay.’’ Nick bites his lip and lets out a short laugh.
‘’Okay. All right.’’
Nick makes his way on top of me again, putting the tiny box near his reach. He leans down, kissing me gently, one hand on my face the other struggling with his pants, once again I reach down to help him, this time he lets me help. After many breathtaking kisses Nick takes off his jeans.
I can feel him, so close, so romantic and hot. Our breaths are unsteady, our moans filling the room. His mouth is on my neck leaving bruises and hickeys everywhere, his hands slowly sliding down my body, stopping at the hem of my boxers. He stops, looking up at me with a ‘’can I?’’ in his eyes, I just nod and he takes them off.
‘’Okay, if you ever wanna stop, just tell me. We’ll go slow.’’ He reassures me and kisses my cheek. I just nod, shy because of the situation.
He slides down his boxers but doesn’t take them off. He grabs my hand and wraps it around his dick, moving it up and down. I see him bit his lips and let out a deep groan. He stops moving my hand but I don’t stop moving my hand.
‘’Okay, that’s enough.’’ He whines out. ‘’Now we have to focus on you, okay? Just stay relaxed, it won’t hurt. Open up, please.’’ Two of his fingers make their way into my mouth, I start to suck on them for a while. He slides them off and puts them near my entrance. ‘’Okay baby, take deep breathes for me. Just relax.’’ He slides one finger in. ‘’That’s it, good boy.’’ He pumps hi finger in and out, and then the second finger slides in, moans slip out my mouth while he whispers praises into my ear. After lots of kisses, moans, and praises he asks ‘’you think you can take me now?’’
‘’Yes, yes I can.’’
‘’All right, relax.’’ I feel it slide in, my back arches as I let out a chocked moan, he kisses me lovingly. ‘’It’s okay, I won’t move yet, tell me when to.’’ I grab his face, kissing him, deeply, with all the care and love I can express in one kiss, it’s a long kiss, one of his hands caressing my head, the other rubbing my waist.
‘’You can move, please, move.’’
He does, he moves, at first painfully slow. Later he finds a pace we both enjoy, our faces red, music in the background, moans and smacking filling the room. I feel my body twitch and squirm.
‘’Fuck, I’m close.’’ Nick moans. I feel it in my stomach, that familiar sensation that I have only experienced alone. I let out a whine, finishing all over our bodies. ‘’Shit.’’ His thrusts speed up and stop fast. His chest goes up and down unevenly and my brain is still dizzy. He leans in and we share one last passionate kiss, I feel him pull out.
‘’I love you.’’ I whisper against his lips.
‘’I love you more.’’ He whispers back. ‘’I’ll get us cleaned up, and I’ll bring you a snack, stay there, baby.’’ He kisses my cheek and starts walking to the bathroom.
‘’White Chicks.’’
‘’What, baby?’’
‘’I want to watch white chicks.’’ He laughs, and gives me the sweetest smile.
‘’As you wish baby.’’
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i hope you like this, i feel like i could improve my "spicy" writing a lot, im not very good at it. but i hope you all enjoyed this.
take care and be kind.
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williamrikers · 1 year ago
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some incoherent thoughts about THE queer rights scene of 2023
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i love that in this episode, kawi had to confront his latent fears about being part of the queer community. notably, we can see his face on "queer people do not have the same rights that straight people do". if he wants to act on his feelings for pisaeng, this is the reality he will have to accept--and this is the reality he has been trying to avoid for A LOT of years at this point.
he spent so much time trying to make fetch happen, conform to society's standards by step 1: romancing a beautiful woman, step 2: ???, step 3: profit. however, even when he did manage to romance pear, he failed to go through with the other ""normal"" heterosexual milestones: he refused to marry her, refused to start a family with her, both of which she explicitly asked him for. kawi never outright says this but i would like to think that the reason he doesn't is because deep down he does not want those milestones for himself. the original plan before he started time traveling was "make pear fall in love with me". the plan never went any further than that. apparently, once she was in love with him, kawi then didn't really know what to do with her.
because all that time, kawi had been deluding himself. had been hiding from the truth of himself because the truth was scary and painful, not just on a personal level but in a "if i admit this about myself, my rights might be taken away, my humanity might be questioned" way. and in this scene, kawi had to confront that. had to be told, yes, this is the risk you are taking. and kawi decided that for pisaeng, that risk is worth it.
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one of kawi's main flaws that he's been struggling to overcome is his tendency to run away. max called him out on this a few episodes ago, and the whole story even starts with kawi running from the bleak reality of his lonely life by escaping into his own past.
kawi, pisaeng and max all have storylines about not running away, about choosing to stay and fight: for pisaeng and max, that choice is mostly geographical, but for kawi, that choice is spiritual. he has to choose to stay by pisaeng's side and fight for him. he has to choose to be honest and upfront about his feelings. he has to choose to live his life in the present and taking on the challenges life throws at him without running away from them.
interestingly, in this episode where he truly starts to embrace that, the episode opens on his father finally and irrevocably dying. some things can't be changed even through magical time travel. some things kawi has to face, no matter how hard he tries to run away from them. (and yes, i am extremely smug about having predicted this correctly.)
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not gonna lie, "love for your body, your soul, or even love for someone else" changed me on the molecular level. queerness as love for our bodies and our souls, man, that just hit me today, especially because i honestly Do Not love my body. i can't bear to look at myself most days. but recontextualizing that desire to change myself into a shape i will be more comfortable in as love... i think this show somehow gave me therapy today?? idk i'm very incoherent about this but man. this is going to stay with me for the rest of my life.
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GOD, my man kawi is so scared. SO SO SO scared. always has been. and him having to confront that along with everything else he's had to confront is just so beautiful. he has to embrace the fear if he wants his life to be better. there's no magical button that's going to take the fear away (ironic, on the show with the magical time traveling device), he has to confront it and power through it, and we see him do just that in the confession scene.
that confession. jesus, kawi is TERRIFIED. he tries to tell pisaeng like three times and can't do it every time, up until pisaeng threatens to leave again and kawi is like. no. not having pisaeng in my life is even worse than telling him the truth, and it just breaks out of him. that confession scene is just utterly brilliant on so many levels, because at this point, kawi has learned to speak gracefully and with purpose, and he does that, but it is so clear that he's also deeply afraid. and pisaeng teasing him about it by letting him believe for a moment that he won't go out with kawi... these two deserve each other. they're both idiots. why am i crying.
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everything in this show has been about growth from the start: pisaeng going from marrying a woman he knew he could never love to outright saying "i'm gay" to his homophobic mother, kawi going from being a cringefail anti-social shut-in to someone who can speak and listen gracefully and with humility (when he tries). and those journeys weren't easy! we saw kawi struggling for eight whole episodes to become a kinder, more sociable person. we saw pisaeng literally flee the gay club the first time he went there.
because love isn't just about feelings for someone else. (max actually mentions those last.) love is, first and foremost, love for ourselves, for our bodies and our souls. and, as max says:
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this show is a love story, but more importantly, it is a story of growth. of kawi and pisaeng loving themselves enough to embrace the fear and the uncertainty and daring to love themselves and each other, daring to live their truth. daring to grow and change and embrace these changes. and some of those changes they go through stem from their love for each other, while others deepen their love for each other (personally, i think we'll see more of the latter in the upcoming episodes).
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pisaeng loved kawi from the very start. he loved him as he was: a shy, awkward loner. in pisaeng's opinion, there was nothing wrong with kawi, no reason not to love him. however, they can only love each other after kawi makes the effort to change himself, makes the effort to "become a better man", as the lyrics of the theme song would have it. because that shy, awkward loner could never stand in front of tall, gorgeous pisaeng and tell him with emotional honesty and complete certainty that he likes him and wants to go out with him. and a relationship can only work if both parties are equally invested in it.
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