#// a lot of bisexuality here. im biased

[dingodad]

I have been thinking about you saying of course Karkat the misogynist would say of troll society "We don't think about or care about genders on Alternia and making me think about that is culturally insensitive" but then oh geez everyone just believed that. and im having a laff. Because I remember being a teenager going like "Hm...karkat's attitude toward terezi and the general narrative weight around kanaya's lesbianism plus eridan's deal with feferi would imply similar gendered oppressions as real life. but trolls don't have those problems...weird!"

and then just stayed confused about it forever. like maybe the contradictions just meant karkat lied. i just didn't think he would do that.

disclaimer: i'm not sure i've ever expressed this exact sentiment? so it's possible you're thinking of someone else and i don't want to take full credit if that's the case LOL. but karkat's misogyny and the way things on alternia are never as benign as they have been painted by readers in retrospect are certainly themes i have frequently and recently touched upon.

to that effect, though, unless there's something i'm majorly forgetting, my position is moreso that i don't think karkat DOES ever imply trolls don't care about gender? certainly it's from karkat's mouth that we get the most vivid image of how unfriendly alternia really is to girls. and yeah, he gives us the "HOW IS THAT [HOMOSEXUALITY] EVEN A THING?" which was presumably the kernel of the idea that led to trolls "reproducing bisexually", but the way i see it "trolls are bisexual and therefore don't care about gender AT ALL" was only ever wishful elaboration on the part of a vocal and influential minority of readers.

i think it's good that you bring up how you never considered that karkat could be lying, because i think the fact that we go into a story assuming that characters will tell us the truth - or rather, more importantly, that what they say will have some meaning to us - is a convention that homestuck dedicates a lot of thought to. that's the whole reason scratch has his arbitrary "i don't lie" rule. so i think you or any reader are totally justified in hesitating to believe karkat would just lie to you! and i think the key here is that "lying", per se, is not really a tool in karkat's repertoire. being deeply misled and chronically biased, on the other hand, definitely are. and once we dispense of this misconception that karkat must necessarily be a "nice guy" (and the planet he's from must necessarily be a "nice world" in some way, no matter how desperately small) it becomes a lot easier to read this bias for what it is, which is not necessarily truth, not necessarily lies, but necessarily informative about the world he lives in. bc that's what a story about stories is really talking about, right, not whether someone is telling the "truth" but whether they are peddling a "narrative"

[moon-upright]

Julian personality styles brainrot. . .

so i was taking personality tests on behalf of julian devorak, as one does, and i thought this was actually kind of interesting.

disclaimer: while i believe this is pretty true to julian as a character, it's probably at least a little biased because i did answer based on how -> I <- see him, so it might not align with your opinion.

**also, any terms used in this are NOT talking about or diagnosing any disorder, just used as ways to describe a personality. this is a for fun test and isn't meant to be taken very seriously. (i.e., scoring "histrionic" does NOT mean this is a representation of hpd). ok? ok.

the results i got (or the results that Julian got) were "Multiple Personality Styles," which basically means i either pressed "agree" too much or he has more than one equally prominent personality style. tied for first, as you can see in the image, are "histrionic" and "depressive". the idea that these two personality styles are expressed equally in julian is lowk funny to me, but also makes perfect sense. those two go hand in hand when it comes to his personality.

histrionic is defined as "overly theatrical or melodramatic in character or style"

depressive personality is related to traits that include (but are not limited to) nonassertiveness, gloominess, self-criticism, low self-esteem, guilt, and anxiety. depressive and histrionic seem to contradict a bit, but julian is a PTSD-ridden, depressed, flamboyant bisexual theater kid who loves people. that's a lot. and if anyone would have two strong personality styles concurrently, it's him.

his next highest is "masochistic" which is, well. yeah.

3rd place is hypomanic, hypomania being considered a milder version of mania (elevated mood or energy, overactivity, etc). this makes sense once again, since we know he can be restless and energetic, has consistent difficulty with sleep, and even worked so hard during the plague that he apparently didn't even notice his apprentice (potentially his love interest, depending on your interpretation), getting sick.

im not going to discuss everything on here, but i do want to define the 0% ones. Sadistic means hurting others and enjoying it, Narcissistic is inflated sense of pride (and a sensitive ego), Negativistic is opposing what other people say and do, and Schizoid is characterized with aloofness and being solitary. for all of these, - for the reason that julian is very sociable, selfless, and doesn't want to hurt a fly - 0% is the right level in my eyes.

so long story short. i just wanted to share these silly personality test results. it makes me understand why valdemar wanted to dissect julian's brain so much (though i will never support that). this was kind of a mess but really im just brainrotting and i don't post that often so 😭

here's the link for the quiz if you want to take it for yourself or even try to see if your Julian results match with mine !

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hello again!

Okay I'm just here for a chat (if thats okay) (i think you're lovely!)

There are some stuff about the show that really bother me you know... First of all in season 4 What Happens to John Watson.. like he is simply characterized by loyalty right it is who he is, then HOW does he cheat on Mary?! (Okay granted that his heart was elsewhere... ahem. But he's just not someone who would cheat)

Also i think Mary shouldn't be a villain... i know she possibly looks like it messes up Johnlock but i think its the opposite actually. I think John is bisexual and his love for her was real but she was basically a Sherlock substitute who looked like him (John)! Plus, she was there when he was at rock bottom so. But what doesn't make sense is her shooting Sherlock in the chest?! What's up with that!

Okay but the Weirdest part is in the last episode when Sherlock has to choose between John and Mycroft and finally choses to shoot himself... BOTH John and Mycroft do Nothing?? HOW

AAAAA the Last Season was SO much angst.. i think this fandom saved me <3

In my head It was love at first sight... and then slowly falling head over heels crazy in love with your best friend and all of it culminating in the most beautiful TV Romance.

(okay im sorry i think i ranted a bit)

Hi Lovely!

Inbox is always open for a chat (even if it takes me a long time to get to it, LOL), so no worries!

Let's address each of you things one by one:

What HAPPENS to John Watson – Your guess is as good as mine, Lovely, and it's a lot of the reason a lot of us can't take S4 seriously. It feels so OOC for John to cheat on Mary with ANY other woman, other than Sherlock (hence it being part of the Alibi theory, this part of it referencing SHERLOCK as being the one John is actually texting in the night), so many of us just don't think that S4 is what it appears to be on the surface. Of course, it could all just be a coping mechanism to deal with how dirty a beloved series did it's fandom, but we take what we can get, honestly.

As for villain Mary, I have to respectfully disagree, only because I believe that I think they were setting her up in S3 to BE a kickass antagonist for S4. Amanda ALSO thought they were going that route for a bit until (my speculation) things went sour with MF, AND they built up her character as a psychopath imho. Then they made her character attempt a piss-poor redemption arc that just... really soiled S4 for me because I firmly believe that John would have NEVER forgiven Mary for trying to kill Sherlock after seeing what it did to him the first time.

But to your point: John is bisexual, yes, but I don't think he's biromantic. I think he's homoromantic, and it's VERY played up in the series that this is the case: his blasé attitude about ALL his girlfriends, but pouncing around the close men in his life like a puppy? Heck, if Lestrade was single, I have NO doubt John would have taken his chances with him too, LOL. John is horny. That's literally the gist of it. He likes sex, he doesn't care what hole it goes in, just as long as he gets it. But I do think he forms VERY strong attachments to men in his life, and in turn he gets hurt, so he pretends he's not into men because it's "just easier" (you can read more posts about my and others' thoughts on John's sexuality here). He was with Mary because he was lonely, and Mary played him like a fiddle. She knew what John liked, and played that up. I believe it's even explicitly stated she knows what John likes. They only knew each other 6 months, CONVENIENTLY just before Sherlock was on his way back? Even ANDERSON picked up on Sherlock making his way back to London. I believe she was a Moriarty plant to see if John knew Sherlock was for-real dead, and she herself enjoyed the game and stealing and keeping John for herself away from Sherlock was part of that game upon the return. So yeah, I really have a hard time believing she OR John actually loved each other. I dunno, again, personal biases and readings of the series, apologies, LOL. I spent a LOT of time analysing Mary's character arc. But I WANTED her to be the big bad for S4, and it just... fizzled and died.

And finally, on your point about the weirdness of John nor Mycroft opting to stop Sherlock, yeah, have to agree with you there. TFP was a goddamned clustereff of WTF moments and mischaracterizations of literally every character on-screen. The only character NOT in character was Eurus and that's literally because they didn't know what to fucking do with her. TFP was so dumb. I have a hard time believing any of it actually happened the way it did on-screen. But yeah, S4 was a big disappointment for everyone including the actors. I think they only people who thought it was great was Mofftiss and that's because they love the smell of their own farts. I can't believe that they GENUINELY thought TFP was going to be Emmy-worthy (for those unaware, they initially planned to nominate TFP for the Emmy, and instead chose TLD, I believe, after the poor reception of TFP, and acted like they were always going to nominate TLD lol).

Anyway, yeah, it was full of angst, though my reasons for it are probably different than everyone else's, LOL. But the fandom IS fantastic, and that's why we stay here, and why I choose now to curate fandom content. Makes me happy, and keeps me out of drama, LOL.

Thank you so much for giving ME the opportunity to chat and rant! It's been so long since I've done mini meta, and posted my thoughts about everything. I like chatting.

Hope you're having a wonderful day, and sorry again for the delay! <3

[aeongstarss]

hi all!! i’m new to tumblr, so here’s an introduction!

about me ^^

age: 19

sign: libra

loc: usa

lang: eng/中文

sexuality: bisexual

interests/likes:

crochet, drawing, painting, cats, kpop, hamsters, kdrama, cdramas, cpop, sleeping, youtube, roblox, reading, vkei, sunsets, vinyls, the ocean, night time, city life, romance, flowers, uncanny counter, alice in borderland, anime

ult groups and biases:

loona - hyunjin, choerry, gowon and hyeju

billlie - haruna and siyoon

nct - taeyong

new jeans - haerin and minji

ateez - wooyoung and mingi

fave animes: dororo, tomodachi game, attack on titan, blue lock, black clover, assassination classroom, chainsaw man, jujutsu kaisen, hxh, demon slayer, erased, nana 🤍

MY PURPOSE ON TUMBLR:

i’ve always enjoyed writing and reading, and i love to bring mine and other peoples scenarios to life! so i’ve come on here to write fanfiction/one shots. i will always put descriptions and tw on all of my writings! most will center around kpop idols and k actors.

i started writing fanfic at around 14(?), and i’ve always enjoyed both reading and writing. i prefer to write lengthy stories but am also okay with writing short scenarios and one shots! i have decided to jump back into the community since i’ve noticed over the years, a lot of fanfics are written very poorly; that being poor grammar, no plot, no lead ups or anything. and it’s quite annoying! you know that feeling when you think you find a great story, but when you start reading it, it’s very disappointing. i’m here to save the day!!

i’m planning on making a carrd to better introduce myself. for now, im looking for moots! please make sure to read the DNI below before!

DNI: under 17 years old, stray kids fan, gg anti, solo stan, like gore, promote ed and unhealthy habits

BYF: i am 19!! soon to be 20. i am not comfortable with being friends/moots with anyone under the age of 17.

thank you all for reading! let’s be friends! 🤍

[joleneghoul]

Just talking abt frustrations: transphobia and ableism talk.

Life has been really hard for me lately (which ig is nothing new, but I've been through multiple deaths and shit recently etc, etc my business) and then whenever I go online or turn on the tv or anything its people calling for elimination of people like me and people i care about people i consider family. Everywhere i look people are trying to control what others can do with their OWN bodies.

I'm 23, im not old, but ive been through this a lot, ive been around people my whole life who have faced this stuff too. My fathers best friends were gay men his age as well as my uncle. I heard stories of bar horror stories, police, etc. Those men are the reason im an artist today and would buy me gifts when we couldnt afford anything.

Chronic lifelong illness runs in the family both ways and ive had friends and family die and disappear and so have people before me because of the lack of care, hate, and biases from professionals.

I have had mentors who were older gay people when i was a child who are the only reason im here today. When I was a teenager a lot of these anti trans bills were in their baby steps, like bathroom bills etc, i know the loneliness and pain that comes with it and hopelessness. My bisexual art teacher would sit with me during lunch and tell me she was scared too.

Im trans im disabled i have reproductive health issues i have hormone issues i am sick, me and my body are allowed to fucking exist.

I struggle to talk about it myself because these are difficult and scary things and i am not in the safest place myself right now, but it is important now more than ever to speak up and care for others and listen to people and their experiences.

Being alone is one of the deadliest things at times like these, but nobody truly is. Trans people have always existed and always will, even if you don't see them. People you will never know or meet will be there with you, existing.

[transingthoseformers]

Top 5 Decepticons?

5: tfp soundwave. The mans is amazing with he groundbridge skills and has a very pretty design. The datacables are by FAR an interesting idea and I wish I could have a visor like his. He's the oil in the Nemesis's joints and one of the few characters whose body language i can not only read but enhances him.

4: sadly mtmte Tarn. His design is interesting, he's pathetic as hell and that means i must bully him and want to fuck him. The mask is cleverly designed, he interacts with the rest of the DJD in an interesting way, and his Voice is a cool concept and i wish i could further understand how it works. I hate him so much that I'm obligated to put him in juuuuust out of the top three

3: g1 Starscream. His ass is Fun. I absolutely love his color scheme, her helm looks so discordant from the white/red/blue frame that it seems like Starscream is in a full body suit. Her persistent desire to become the leader of the Decepticons, the random screaming like yes! I also have major issues keeping my voice down and I wish i could just scream please. Starscream was a scientist and had a frozen boyfriend and is 100% the face of g1 in my opinion

2: tfa Strika. Tbh we don't see a lot of her in series but I enjoy her design, the anomalous marriage to Lugnut, and in general wish we could see her more in future series girlboss needs to come back. Her being a general makes me have so many questions about the tfa Decepticon command structure besides megs the sic and the tic, and fr her colors are super pleasing and I enjoy how she's not some little lithe mech who looks like a living barbie doll no she's built to cause some damage. She's big, she's destructive, she runs her shit well, and she has serious bisexual husband energy

1: you know full well I'm putting Megatron here, and as far as continuity I cannot decide. I love tfp Megatron's obsession with the purple crack and his design and im biased as that's the first megan i was introduced to and the one i find myself going nuttiest for fanon depictions of him. I find mtmte Megatron so intriguing especially his introduction to the flying asylum known as the Lost Light and the slow and steady redemption arc. I Love how tfe Megatron not only has a human buddy but hasn't lost the g1 energy— instead he's channeled it to help people. BW Megatron is fucking hilarious with his yessssss and his face and being Inferno's royalty. G1 Megatron is So Goddamn Erratic in just the best way possible and I've seen so many fun depictions of him. TFA Megatron is amazing because we see him succeeding at playing nice with the humans, he hates Earth so goddamn much it's hilarious, instead of dealing with tfa Starscream's bullshittery he just up and shoots them, and I honestly think it was a good decision to have him wired into the lab as a head in the first season. Plus, in general you can see the attitude that people have towards Megatron changing and how he's slowly changing depiction to depiction. He's gone from your average literally and metaphorically two dimensional character to a massively intriguing mech known to be many people's favorite.

[xxe123spiderfreakxx]

when my sister was going through some stuff in high school my mom showed her the film "he's just not that into you" which is like...an okay film but I at least stand by that it's addressing how we set up cis girls to struggle and fail in romantic relationships with cis guys. so it's a limited coverage that mainly looks at heteronormative relationships but it's digging at something there.

and i don't think amy is straight personally but i imagine vanilla would see how sad amy is about stuff with sonic and struggling and would sit her down to watch that movie (imagine that movie but now everyone is a furry. i would actually like that film helluva lot more tbh).

it's her way of trying to help and be a mother for her and maybe gently encourage to move on to find someone who would really appreciate and be into her romantically. but in her way too that knows amy won't listen if you tell her to give up sonic directly (bc vanilla has probs suggested that and it upset amy so she stopped but also she's not just going to watch her daughter continue to be miserable) because amy is so determined to chase him.

there's something to try and approach someone when you're worried about them, and when you know they probs won't take your advice or maybe you don't have the most proficient skill to tackle a problem they're having so you're like "here read this i think you'll like it :)"

i think teenagers are usually more of this ilk where you don't want to push them away or come down too hard when you're worried about them but you still want to keep them safe or try to help them. like. vanilla knows that this movie won't be a cure-all for amy's heartache but she's hoping it'll be a useful addition to her toolset when she inevitably has to grapple with the reality of her and sonic not being a thing.

like you can't stop your child going through upsetting or difficult experiences as much as you want to but you hope you've done everything you can to prepare them or help them and have maintained a warm place for them to run back to when it inevitably does go to shit.

;-; vanilla and amy's relationship is so important to me <333

but also i take umbridge with ppl saying sonic isn't into her bc he's gay, and i know im biased bc im the biggest diehard of bisexual nonbinary sonic...

and i think it's a simpler solution for ppl to write it that way, but uhhh i just think it's bc he's not that into her <3 sonamy besties 4 life tho after they sit down and hash it out

[rachalixie]

hi hello, how has life been for you?🫧 this is actually the first time i am lurking into your anon box heheh

i would like to inform you as a danceracha biased stay that i very much loved your hyunlix drabble and i have loved every one of your minho drabbles ever.

like how are these gorgeous men breathing the same air as us?????? i have no idea but every time i think about it my braincells melt a little bit.

i'm also a little late but as a bisexual stay i also need the feel to say that hyunjin and yeji didn't need to go that hard with the collab???? like i don't know who i want to be more

anyways i'm sending lots of love and freshly baked croissants to my fav writer here!!!🫧🫧

eeee hi!!!!!

omg thank you!! it flopped so it’s nice to hear that you enjoyed it :))

god i VERY much agree they’re not REAL they can’t be that perfect it really just doesn’t make sense in my head!!!!!

STOP the first reaction i had to their collab was BISEXUAL PANIX HAHAHA im glad we have a collective experience

also SCREAM i love croissants and i love you you’re so sweet <333

[junietuesday]

I know exactly what you mean as a bisexual who reads a lot of zelink fanfics. I feel like it's the most glaringly obvious when it comes to nsfw fics. It really brings people's biases about gender roles out when they write smut. You can kind of immediately tell when a fic was written by someone who was brought up with conservative christian ideas and still has those ideas vs a queer or non-religious author by how they approach things. It's very obvious. It's suddenly "no sex before marriage" or something of that ilk or it's suddenly painfully obvious the author has only watched porn aimed at men and has no other reference about how sex works. I also can't help but notice people are afraid to state the male character "moaned" it always has to be "groaned" for some reason. Like "moaning" is somehow less masculine or something? I also hate when people make Link a complete horndog. I don't mind people giving him the occasional realistic intrusive teenage boy thought, that's just embarrassingly relatable when done right, but when people make him this sex god who goes around sleeping with everyone in castle town or something to make him more "manly" I just. Ugh. I wish they'd realize there is nothing wrong or "less manly" about a guy having no experience with girls. To say nothing of how they make Zelda uncharacteristically meek and demure. People seem to be weirdly afraid of ~emasculating~ the androgynous elf guy who canonically crossdresses or ever letting him be vulnerable, something that is important in relationships.

YES LITERALLY ALL OF THIS. esp the thing abt it being so much more prevalent in nsfw fics. like they really need to make link this hypermasculine virile animalistic sex god, and zelda this shy fainting flower to his manliness. like this is zelda, did we even play the same game if you think she’s not headstrong and enthusiastic and shes Anything but meek to link in the memories, and link is just a goofy somewhat-guy, i just cant reconcile this cishet manly man version of link w his softness w her in the cutscenes and, yknow, all the gender he has going on. ive even seen fics when its like, the idea of link being Not cishet gets played for laughs, like “his masculinity being tested” by anal(????? hello??) and zelda full on laughing at link for having kissed a boy once and link denying it as a phase when he was young…… girl im sorry but not even getting into the homophobia there, zelink is (t4t) bi4bi it just is. you can really tell when the authors still buy into cisheteronormativity from the characterizations getting put second to the gender roles, and from even the descriptions of their bodies being almost objectifying to match conventional beauty standards from movies (its always link’s bulging rippling muscles or zelda’s feminine curves and “womanhood”). its so jarring to get used to less cishet romance writing in fanfic compared to some mainstream media, only to get reminded that those cishet romance writers are here too lmao. at this point i just stick to the few zelink authors who actually get them right and dont really go diving through the whole tag

[gwinnetts-archive]

// seeing all the “my muse is [orientation]” posts makes me, as a multimuse, weep gently bc i dont wanna spam everybody by reblogging them. SO here’s a post with a listing of my characters’ labels instead, which is something i... don’t think i’ve done anyway

elle — panromantic gray asexual zetta — demisexual and not as straight as she expects she is riley — bisexual bellamy — aromantic asexual, borderline sex repulsed maccready — bisexual

dean domino — heterosexual edward deegan — bisexual shaun — aromantic asexual x6-88 — [redacted] xavier — homosexual

jack cabot — oblivious but he ain’t as straight as he’s expecting either, he just hasn’t put any thought into it emogene cabot — bisexual link — he aint know, i aint know braska — bisexual xion — she aint know, i aint know saïx — homosexual will turner — elizabethsexual

[xiaq]

Hi, I have a question re:sex and Christianity. Small background: I still go to church, and I still live with my parents even though I'm not much younger than you, because housing is very very expensive where I live (pretty common here, I would say about 2/3 of my friends live with their parents and we are decently privileged kids)

Anyway. How does one get over purity culture? To be clear, I've never been told in church not to have sex, I've never gotten the gendered lessons that you got. But I am terrified of having sex. My first real, multi-year relationship just ended and while there was hand stuff etc, there was never any p in v sex (lol I feel 12). But I still had insane anxiety about being pregnant despite being on bc. And I think its because I know my parents would be so disappointed if I had sex. And if I was pregnant I could imagine all the gossip. And honestly I think im from a pretty open church, b/c one of our previous ministers kids recently got married at 8 months pregnant and lots of church people were at the wedding and supportive and her parents were there and everything.

I dont even think I particularly like sex, i might be on the ace spectrum, but how do I remove it from all the anxiety that's tied to it so I can even give myself the chance to find out???

(Asking because it seems like you've been pretty open about purity culture/removing yourself from it)

CW for sex talk (again)

How does one get over purity culture?

Oh man. That really is the million-dollar question, huh? Obviously, I can only answer re my personal experiences, and this is something you should talk to a therapist about, but I can tell you how I’ve tackled it with my therapist at least.

Purity culture is, at its core, an ideology that is perpetuated by shame. If you’re indoctrinated into purity culture when you’re a kid, the concepts become baked into the way you construct your identity, your perception of self, and your perception of your sexuality. It’s practically intrinsic, by the time you’re an adult, to feel shame any time you’re reminded you have a body, much less a sexuality.

According to the chapels I sat through every week as a kid, a girl's body could be 3 things: an intentional stumbling block for men, an accidental stumbling block for men, or unnoticeable. Women were to strive for the third option so as to keep their (and their male friends/authority figures) purity intact. After all, if a boy, or even your male teacher, had impure thoughts about you, it was your fault for tempting them (which, holy shit. I still can’t believe that was a thing I bought into for so long. If my 45 yr old grown-ass teacher had impure thoughts because he could see my 12 yr old collarbone, that sure as hell wasn’t my fault. But I digress.) The Only time a woman’s body can be something else, is when she gives it to her husband, at which point she must suddenly flip the switch in her brain that she is now allowed to be a Sexual Being and she must perform Sexual Duties despite living in outright fear of her own body and sexuality for years (decades?) up until this point. Jesus take the wheel.

Purity culture isn’t a thing you can just decide to walk away from if you’ve grown up in it. Because its ideology is insidious and internalized. So first you need to submit to the fact that you’re going to be fucked up about sex. It sounds like you’re there. Second, you need to interrogate what you believe. If you’re leaving religion behind entirely, you’ll approach removing yourself from purity culture differently than if you still identify as a Christian. It sounds like you might be the latter, which meant, for me, separating what’s actually biblical and what’s shitty, contrived, doctrine that I was told is biblical but is actually more political than spiritual. This helps you address the shame issue.

You need to throw away I Kissed Dating Goodbye and Lady in Waiting and all those ridiculous books you read and reread in the hopes of somehow obtaining impossible marriage perfection and look into actual scripture interpreted within its historical context. I could write a book on this, but the TL;DR is that the text of the Bible was written, translated, curated, and changed multiple times over thousands of years by human beings with human biases and, often, personal and/or political agendas. It contradicts itself! Reading it as it is—a flawed historical document—rather than some sort of God-breathed perfect document—is incredibly freeing. When you do, you’ll probably realize that purity culture is bullshit on a spiritual level. Which is a good start, if that matters to you. Because any time you start to feel shame or guilt you can ask yourself: does God actually care if I wear a bikini or touch a dick I’m not married to? Probably not. Wear the bikini. Touch the dick.

The most important therapy session for me was when my therapist asked what I would do if I got to heaven and God was actually the God I’d been raised to fear. What would I do if he condemned me for being bisexual and having premarital sex and becoming educated, for arguing with men, and failing to isolate while menstruating, and wearing mixed fabrics? If Montero had come out at the point, I probably would have said I’d pole dance down to hell. Instead, I said I would spit on heaven’s gates. If a god that cruel and that pointlessly demeaning really exists—a god who would create in me condemned desire—I won't worship him. The good news is, I’m 99% sure he doesn’t exist. At the very least, he isn’t supported by scripture.

Okay. The final thing you need to do is figure out what you actually want, sexually speaking. This bit is probably the hardest. I’m still in the early stages of this myself. You say: “I dont even think I particularly like sex, i might be on the ace spectrum, but how do I remove it from all the anxiety that's tied to it so I can even give myself the chance to find out???” Bro, I wish I had an easy answer for you. For me, whenever I’m feeling anxious about Sex Things, I tell myself: 1. My God does not equate my worth to my sexual habits. 2. My partner does not equate my worth to my sexual habits. 3. I do not equate my worth to my sexual habits. It seems silly, but reminding myself of those three things is massively helpful. If, after I’ve sorted through those, I’m still anxious or uncomfortable, I stop doing the thing. I evaluate. Am I overwhelmed and I need to try again some other time? Do I just not like the thing? Sometimes it’s hard to tell. Sometimes you change your mind. Sometimes you just don’t know. That’s why having a partner who you trust and who’s willing to patiently explore your interests (and respect your disinterests) is so important. Half the battle, for me, was having a partner who told me they’d be ok with no sex at all. Because that took the pressure off me. If the bare minimum they need is nothing, then anything more than that is a bonus! Hooray! This is maybe TMI, but let me tell you. I thought I was asexual* right up until I was able to have moderately non-anxious sex. Never in my life did I think I would initiate a sexual situation but… I do now. It’s a fun thing to do with a person I love and, holy shit. I am furious that I nearly missed out on it.

Finally, re birth control: I don’t know how you can approach that fear in a way that works for you. If you don’t want to ever have penetrative sex, that’s fine! If that’s a point of anxiety you can’t get rid of, then don't push yourself to do it. If you find out you like other sex things, do the other sex things! If you don't like doing any sex things, don't do any sex things! Also, have you considered sleeping with people who can’t get you pregnant? Always an option if it’s an option you want to consider. ;)

Okay. I hope this was even a little bit helpful. Sorry if it’s a little convoluted, I typed it up in bursts during my work breaks.

*This is not at all to say that asexuality can be “fixed." Rather, it’s to say that things like purity culture can drastically confuse your sexuality in general. If you’re asexual, then this process is still important to discover what you like/dislike. Then you can be explicit about those necesities and find a partner who’s a good fit (if you want a partner at all, that is).

[cloneslugs]

top 5 magical girlies!!

would cheat and list out all my magical girl OCs but i wont i will share the love beyond me but know i would put them here too but i wont but i would

1. WHA girlies (: i will not pit them against each other bc that would 4/5 spots on the list and also bc i love them all equally they're my little girlies & theyre all so wonderfully developed and very like. just very well written children (: Coco is just one of the sweetest protags to exist ever she has autistic swag through the roof and she's very sweet and has a beautiful heart & just <3 seeing her grow and her view towards the world and everything so much love & care in her it means the world to me Richeh is my little baby girl shes so uniquely charming i love her blank little face and her attitude towards magic and individuality & shes very quirky cute & Tetia is just a sweetheart such a sweet little girl i love how happy she is also theyre all transgender but she has so much tgirl swag & the creator retweeted transgender art of her so she kind of rules & she just makes me smile shes so kind and loving and well thank you for everything ms tetia & agott is my very very wonderful darling girl i have a soft spot for angry bitter little girls a bit she is my little angel i will always root for you and cheer you on i love how she interacts w people i just they all make me so sniffle ;__; my little girlies ohh you all do so wonderful happy magic i cannot to see where it takes you (:

^ tetia touch (pages L -> R)

2. sakura (: from ccs she is very dear to me she is a very sweet girl and ccs is just genuinely so full of love between characters its very <3 she wins in the mg department just bc she has no consistent outfit and always gets a new mg outfit its very charming and i love her rollerskates i just think she's so sweet, i think she's just very charming she is a sweet little girl who loves her friends and family and is always just very kind (:

3. sorry for wha again she just wins bc shes cool as fuck & also she has one of my favorite designs of all time Ininia win i think every girl needs ribbons and horns

also she just has the fucking coolest brim hat design, makes me very heheheheh hehehehehehhehheh that she doesnt have a brimmed witch hat she has ribbons that serve the purpose of a brim i just love everything about her look

putting jujy here too just bc i dont wanna take more wha spots but she deserves her own spot as well bc i also love her design this isnt to say i dont love the main group's desigsn but i think its so cool to see how other people design their apprentice's cloaks and hats i love all her tassles and i love her cloak especially & the pants her hair is very darling

gonna shut up about wha now bc i would also add lulucy even just for design & also the buff nurse who doesnt do magic but deserves a spot anyone bc women love her sorry . everyone look at wha designs though make me very (:

4. luz from the owl house biased a bit bc i just watched an ep but i love witchy weird girls so so so much shes just very sweet and fun makes me smile a lot (: bisexual win and etc etc

5. i am just gonna list random girls i like i want to say princess comet just bc shes very very very cute and i love a princess from space who is just yayy yayy interacting w the world i only skimmed the first ep of her bc riza wont watch more w me but she charmed me very quickly, i like madoka from pmmm but its been a while im a sucker for pink girls though and shes sweet from what i remember, snow white from [redacted and hit by a truck dont look at this one] bc she is just genuinely one of the sweetest magical girls ever esp given the circumstance of it all and etc & i wont ever forgive the dark magical girl "break the cutie" trope i hope someone dies for that one, rachel roth is my everything goth girl i love emotional problems shes very dear to me as always, trese and kaine are also girls i love who do magic but in a less cute way kind of but also i love you w all my heart thanks for kicking ass and also the tgirl swag, also marcille from dm just bc she has weird girl evil magic swag that just rules and shes funny, i would also list off every hatsune miku song/module thats based on magical girls bc i have 3 off the top of my head that mean a lot to me very cute i think everyone should sing songs about magical girls and what that means and etc, theres other like misc cartoons and stuff of just girls who know magic who also make me smile just bc i think girls learning/doing magic is a sweet and cute thing also for also for honorable mention i'll say the filipino witch from little witch academia even though i know nothing about her but a win for filipinos i hope

[gayfrenchtoast]

Okay fine we're doing this. I havent read the books and I'm probably not going to I've only seen the movies so I'm sorry if anything I say is contradictory or has already been stated.

So! Descendants 3 was kinda shit and I dont like it but especially because of the ending because everybody was like "oh yeah island is open and we're all happy with no worries or implications about free villains or people being spiteful about being imprisoned for years!" In fact if anything they joked about those things.

The island is basically its own culture, I can't say how long it's been around, long enough for some almost adult kids to be about and to develop a kind of community.

The Isle is a place of poverty, people are dirty and on the street, eveyone steals from each other and most people don't put much effort into appearance upkeep (personal or of the sourounding area) not because of laziness or being "evil" but because they clearly don't have time or luxury to do such things or possibly even the clean water. Does the Isle have clean water?? How to they get electricity??? Someone tell me!

Another thing that I've noticed is easy to see but is not much explicitly said is the unique style of those on the Isle. As previously stated they don't have much but those who have the most "power" and such on the Isle are the best example of this As they have the most colourful outfits. However these outfits are often made out of patches and ripped things put together, even salvaged things like nets and chains as we can see on thing like Uma and Harry's outfits in D3 they make the best of what they've got and they do fantastic because their outfits are intricate and detailed and just tell you everything you need to know about them. Which is why it's a damn s h a m e when the original VK's ajust their style to be more like Auradon's. That's not an improvement! Be proud of where you came from!! It's like they forgot what it was like being on the Isle in D3!

Moving on, here's something that was touched on in D2 but not enough. Equality. On the Isle there is basically equal opportunity as in saying everything is shit and nome cares what gender and presumably what sexuality you are as long as you can work. Sexism is shown to be almost casual in aurodon from the looks of it, Chad makes sexist comments and litterally none else says anything or seems to see anything wrong with it except Jay who caves to pressure from peers and expectations. He does redeem himself because he's from the isle and he knows you shouldn't give a shit about anyone's gender or anything. If they can do something and ask to be included you give them that opportunity. The sexism is also implied in the way that the rule book has men written specifically in the first place and that it has taken until then for anyone but boys to be allowed on any kind of sports team. We never see it! It seems to be the hetronormative veiw where the boys do sport and girls do cheerleeding and other genders? What other genders? Never heard of that? BAD AURADON!! I bet there's so many trans folk on the island just living their lives, thinking Aurodon is the better place and not knowing that it's a cis het filled nightmare.

Okay no I'm headcannoning now, if their are now a bunch of Isle kids at auradon prep they find it fucking aweful the way all these preppy royals are treating them and make the first LGBT club in Auradon. There is lots of pushback and they get bullied a fuck ton for making themselves the most prominent queer folk in the school until a fight breaks out and the club demand that they should be treated better, taking all the evidence to fairy godmother who is very hesitant because COME ON she's never been that great she is biased to Auradon kids and if putting away those in the Isle is brought up she is all on it, she is jelly spined about doing anything against the royal kids. So the kids are like "Fine, if you won't help us we'll take this to the King himself!" Well mainly the queer mom's of the group (you know the ones I'm talking about) who lead the others and protect the anxious queers as they storm to Ben at his fucking locker and demand an audience because they are being harassed and bullied and none is doing anything. Ben had no idea there was even a LGBT club (too busy ig) and is gassed there is one for a moment before he's like "wait people are harassing you?" So Bisexual King Ben gets his lovely Bi wife and they start coming to club meetings and investing in the pins and stuff the club makes. Most club members are pleased but the queer mom's are apprehensive that this will help until some assholes come to the club to do their usual bullying only to find King and Queen Beast themselves siting there with rainbow bracelets and bi pins and all trying to have a nice old time eating their fucking cupcakes what the fuck are yall doing? The bullying dies down quick once they realise it ain't gonna fly, the other OG VK's that hear about this become members and very protective over their queer children. Did I mention Dizzy and Ceila are a part of the club? They're girlfriend's. Celia is one of the queer moms. Harry becomes one of the biggest protectors over the group as the pan dad. He's been going around snogging everyone and anyone wholl snog him everyone already knew he was queer they just didn't have the balls to try and bully him over it as much as they bullied the lil club members. But now Harry can often be seen in jackets and shit with pan and general queer patches and pins and running around with his gay children yelling "MOVE WE'RE GAY!!" He totally calls them his queer crew. Anyway as a result lots of queer royals start coming out of the woodwork, obvs Lonnie is one of them, and the club eventually serves to bring members of Auradon and the Isle close together.

Where was I? Yada yada auradon expects girls to be pretty princesses and boys to be brave knights or dashing princes. It's shit and should stop being portrayed as good. Moving on!

Food! One of the things we'll established in all movies is that the food of the Isle is shit compared to food of Auradon. The Isle has no fresh fruit which likely means its almost impossible for things to grow there which is fair because again there doesn't seem to be much fresh water and there are always clouds overhead so no sun. Maybe there is some people trying really hard to grow stuff but the general attitude of the Isle seems to be "there is no time for that" and fruits are forgotten so much that the VK's litterally don't knownwhat they are when they come across them. That and anything containing sugar. Actually it's mention by Dizzy and Celia that they enjoy the fact that the cake dosent have dirt or flies so basically food there is terrible. We don't see much food on the Isle but what we do see seems to be beans, eggs, chips and shellfish. Basically protine and carbs that can be easily stored and produced. To be fair beans are kidna good for you but they're likely a sign that if they get any imports from the mainland it is canned stuff. Prison food. There's probably some chef villain that is trying their best to make good food out of the shit but honestly the Isle dwellers should be angry that they've been deprived of good food for so long not happy they're finally been given decency.

Moving on, music! Auradon dosent have nearly as many musical numbers it seems, the Isle songs have a distinct style, to them, the villains that basically "founded" the place were masters of the dramatic songs (with backup or solo) so banging music is basically ingrained in the music's culture, even for battle as we see with the fight between Mal and Uma in D3. Meanwhile Auradon seems to have mainly romance and "I want" songs. Even Audrey's villain song is basically an I want song.

Okay let's talk about the Villains. We've established that the VK's are not inherently bad. However not all of them can be totally good and there are legit OG Villains just kinda chillin on the Isle. They've obviously lost quite a bit of their power, motivation and sanity (isolation will do that to ya as they lost everything and the VKs know no different) but deadass? They were bad guys. You can try to rehabilitate them sure but you've basically just let them free roam, they could make a runner and you wouldn't get the chance. They were also shitty patents which is brushed over/joked about in the interaction between Carlos and...man I feel bad I forgot her name deadass their relationship seemed to come out of nowhere in the second film she didn't seem interested in them at all and friendzoned them multiple times I'm pretty sure Disney did that becaue queer kids were relating to Carlos and headcanoning them as queer (which they deffinatly are) but deadass their mom is an attempted animal murderer and has hurt her child as we can see from how they're afraid of her and her rhetoric and yet it's "haha I'm afraid to meet your ma!" "Me too cus im a dog! Lol!" Fuuuuck offfffff

I think I'm running out of thoughts so here's a last one for now; with the magical barrier down a bunch of magical Villains kids should be coming out for the woodwork. We know Mal has magic basically stored in her so it's is possible, she technically doesn't need the spellbook to do magic it is just inherent to her. So with the diverse range of people from the isle there are deffinatly magic folk in there. Actually if we're following Disney movie law I saw something mentioning Jay being half Genie and yeah! He should be half Genie! Jafar got turned into a Genie he's probably only human because of the barrier! Oh also Ben should be able to go beast on command as long as he had a better beast form than he did in the movies. And give him back the beard and fangs like fuck you he looked so much better

Okay I'm done for now

[sapphos-darlings]

is it OK that I'm more attracted to curvy women? I feel bad because I feel like im being like, idk, upholding beauty standards? I think that flat girls can be really cute and I'd still probably date her if I really like other things about her, but I seem to find wider, curvier bodies more attractive. Ik that bi girls tend to be pretty misogynistic but I'm trying hard not to be like that. But also on the other hand isn't it technically my personal preference? Idk, I'm conflicted.

Hey there! First off, bisexual women are individuals just like anybody else, we're not doomed to repeat patriarchal sexist nonsense any more than any other woman is. It's always good to be checking your own biases, but bisexuals are no more misogynistic than other women. Internalised and externalised misogyny is, unfortunately, just a problem that many women have because of the values and biases we're conditioned to by society - even lesbians have these problems!

As per your question, liking a body type is a value neutral trait. Everyone has preferences and likes and wants, it's neither here nor there what those are, as long as they're not things that are either harmful or distressing to the person themselves or the people they're attracted to. A lot of women are curvy, it's a natural body type, so of course you can ve attracted to that! Curvy bodies are not offensive, man-made and unattainable, or unrealistic in the slightest. They're just a type of female body.

[maldito-arbol]

Sexuality and/or gender head canons for the calamity trio in ibybf? (Sorry for all the asks,,)

No no I’m having the time of my life answering :3 and because I feel like Neurodivergently Rambling currently this post is about to be kinda Long

SCREECH OKAU OKAY SO THIS IS HOW I HEADCANON EVERYONE IN CANON

Anne

Sexuality: lesbian

Gender: trans girl she/her OR she/they both good

Marcy

Sexuality: lesbian (my irl friends insist she’s pan but i know her personally ok)

Gender: literally any flavor of non-binary, tho I’m biased towards it/they pronouns for our Marbles

Sasha

Sexuality: bisexual (it’s the VIBE idk how else to explain it)

Gender: Genderfluid and/or transmasc headcanons are all very big brain, tho im biased towards she/he pronouns for our Sashy

+They’re all poly too sorry I don’t make the rules

+I like the headcanons where when Sasha and Anne figure out their Genders they swap any and all gendered clothing

+Sasha and Marcy help each other bind cause god knows it is Difficult sometimes

+the fact that short hair Sasha has become a Phenomenon in the fandom will never cease to amaze and enchant me but I like to think Marcy helped her and/or went with him to Do the Deed and they both got nailed with Gender Euphoria all at once

+this is entirely off topic but the very first character I headcanoned as trans was Sprig he just gives off VIBES aGAIN and I think he’s pansexual too. But Anne was my immediate second she is so trans i can’t function wndjwksks

Now for IBYBF in particular, I don’t know. Their sexuality headcanons still apply but I’m not sure what to do about genders. It really never crossed my mind to do anything Gender related with the trio especially since I was still grappling with my own gender identity when I started off with PMIT and I most certainly was not Out to anyone at that point, which means the series started and has continued with everyone being cis. HOWEVER,,,, you can tell my Gender influence has started bleeding in with the Gems having blue hair and pronouns. Heart being they/them, Wit being she/her, and Strength being it/its. This was largely because I started off using it/its on all of them but then I was like ‘no no, give them some flavor✨’ so here we are now. A large part of this decision also has to do with the emphasis I’m placing on the Gems being People, which, going forward, you’re going to see a lot more of. (One of the major threads of fic 3 is going to revolve around the dynamics between the gems and their previous vessels and how it’s impacted who they are now.)

Will I touch Gender territory with the calamity trio in the future? I don’t know. I talked about the question in a reply to a comment on the fic proper too but basically most of what holds me back is the fear that I might portray something inaccurately at best or straight up offensive at worst. I know very little about the experience of mtfs because I’m afab and while I am Genderfluid, I’ve come to understand my experience is hardly universal and Gender is experienced very differently by different people. I could write it In Theory, I’m just terrified of doing so sndjeksksk. It’s in a similar vein to my fear of how I’m portraying polyam relationships too—which I went on that terribly disjointed rant about in my last post. Its a topic that gives me Anxiety and I don’t know if I wanna tackle another when I’m already freaking out about writing poly relationships even tho I AM POLY. We’ll see how I feel in the future tho—after all, I was worried I’d be too uncomfortable portraying Anne’s self-destruction arc too and yet i did it anyway.

But anyway if you would like to read the characters as Gender regardless feel free to do so in fact I encourage you to do so cause damn sis those girls ain’t cis 🧐 thank u for coming to my Ted talk 💜

[monstroso]

casting frenzy and sending you frasier crane for that ask meme

kjhsdkjfshdfjkh omg. when i say i screamed......

okay so FAIR WARNING, i have not finished Frasier but i am trying!! im on like season 3 or something.

My NOTP for them: ...Lilith.

This is going to sound so bad, I know, given that (I'm pretty sure?) Lilith is considered Frasier's best match in the general fandom at large. I just... they tried it! It didn't work! I've seen lots of redditors argue that he should have (or did, depending on your tinfoil hat fan theory) patched things up with her and I just feel for poor Freddie in that situation. These are the same people who think Toriel and Asgore should get back together. The relationship might be interesting but it's definitely not fun as a romance. I love divorce!

My BROTP for them: Niles

Saying Niles here feels like a cop-out but it's absolutely true. The best moments on the show so far have been Frasier and Niles having some kind of argument or falling out and then coming back together to talk about their views on the situation and either patch things up or agree to disagree.

My OTP for them: *buries face in hands* ROZ.

I know the show makes it abundantly clear this pairing is WRONG and they're WRONG and you're bad for thinking it's good but I am suuuuuuch a sucker for workplace will-they-won't-they and the writers KNEW that and they're TAUNTING ME. There's something to be said for chemistry! That's all I'll say!

My second choice pairing for them: Kate

I loved Kate. I think she probably didn't go over well with audiences or something because the way they wrote her off the show felt like a bit of a cop-out to me (and also kind of a joke at the expense of people who liked them together? i digress). I might just be biased because I really did love every second she was on-screen. Again, there's something to be said for chemistry!

My fluffy pairing for them: Daphne

This is a non-romantic relationship that I actually really love. I like Frasier and Daphne having a sort of older-brother-younger-sister deal, and it's nice to see it play out with Frasier looking out for her well-being and Daphne never pulling her punches when it comes to telling him exactly what she thinks.

My angsty pairing for them

"Frasier" and "angst".... not really what we're here for, but I imagine Frasier/Lilith Round 2 is a strong contender!

My favorite poly ship for them 

I do not want to see the poly ships for this fandom, i cannot imagine a more snug-fitting personal hell.

My weirdest pairing for them: Alistair

Waiting for someone to write the 150k word epic about an AU in which Frasier said yes to Alistair's invitation to that beach vacation where Frasier finds out he's bisexual. taps my watch impatiently.