#+ the world feels so... empty idk
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
Tumblr has 411 employees.
Text
Ik that its probably the burnout from brsrk fanboys saying it's the best shit ever but. Brsrk worldbuilding isn't even that good
#the characters are the story strength#but then i see peopls saying it has the best worldbuilding ever. and it really isn't??#+ the world feels so... empty idk#like the villages are all the same we don't know anything that differentiates mi dland and tu dor#you could switch the two kingdoms and nothing would change#the ku shan have barely any relevance bar a few tropes that say nothing abt their culture they're just watered down fantasy india#there is an holy see that isn't mentioned until the con viction arc while it should have been mentioned earlier#the world simply doesnt feel alive and its more like a set piece than a part of the story#that said#I DO LIKE what mi ura did with the magic system and the go dhand and the spirits#it does fit the setting and the tone of the story#sorry for being so negative xjxjajdkakskskakaka
0 notes
Text
I'm not getting into The Giving Tree discourse...
#personal#delete later#idk i just saw a post of the “alternate ending” comic on my dash and everyone praising it as an improvement and “fixing” the original#which i kinda resent#while tulli and i was taking my nephew to a book store we walked around the kids section and found the giving tree and we read through it#and i was so stricken by how profoundly sad it is. it's not a happy story#in the end both versions tell the exact same lesson. but one flat out tells you and the other makes you sit with a pit in your stomach#and work to find the answer#i dunno it's kids literature but kids literature is important. i don't wanna discredit anyone's bad memories with the book but also i think#sometimes it's ok to make kids a bit sad and upset with fiction.#tweet that goes “what if romeo and juliet didn't kill themselves and explained to the audience that family feuds are bad”#idk you can't seriously read the original book as an adult and say it's glorifying self-martyrdom#when the final drawing of the book is of an old tired man sitting on arotting stump with his hat fallen to the ground#again i don't wanna invalidate people's feelings if they enjoy the alt version i think it's really nice too. but the original has its#purpose too. imagine if at the end of the lorax they show that the boy did it and replanted the world happy ending#wait they did that in the movie shit#i dunno i just love somber children's literature. tulli and i are talking about moomin right now and how the series ends with the moomin#family just leaving. and nobody gets to say goodbye to them. their friends have to find ways to live with the emptiness they've left behin
254 notes
·
View notes
Text
i haven’t been here much recently, and i’m sorry i’ve only been negative on the off chance i’ve been online, but let me just say one last piece before the end of this month, so that maybe the next might be better….
#or maybe my time here ends w this month…i’m not sure i guess it all depends on how i feel but as of right now#everytime i think i'm fine i open tumblr and immediately am sad again the whole app has become my doomscroll at this point#i got a notification on a random talking post from a while ago and it felt like reading the words of a completely different person#lately i find it difficult to find any joy here at all when it always feels so lonely… a type of loneliness i’ve never experienced before#everyone always has ppl interacting w them who are interested in their stuff or are always sent things that are reminiscent of them....#i’m always praised for remembering stuff abt other ppl but i wonder if anyone remembers anything abt me#what is it about me that is so forgettable am i dull am i uninteresting did i not solidify myself enough do you guys just not like me lolz#but i don't want this to come across as guilt tripping or being ungrateful to what i do have because ik comparison is the death of joy but#it's still hard to watch when it's so in your face and it makes me think if ppl only talk to me because they feel obligated to#because anyone can say empty words.... i wish my perception of things didn't turn bitter i wish i hadn't become so jaded but#over and over i've felt irrelevant cast aside overshadowed and i cannot exist in a place where i feel like i'm a ghost in the corner#idk i've never felt like This before and i'm at least glad it's something i can walk away from by just....leaving...#sad that this used to be somewhere i can run away To but now it's become somewhere i want to run away From#i don't know...even if i get over whatever this is...things will never be the same for me... i just don't think i belong here#if only i had never made this blog then i would have saved myself a world of turmoil
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
took myself on a little shopping trip yesterday in the city where i used to study in hopes of lifting my spirits but by the end of the day i felt so disheartened. wandering the same streets 10 years later and not much has changed. i’m still the same lonely unlovable girl.
#i just wanted to have a good time and not rot in bed for once on my work free weekend but of course my brain can’t let that happen#it was such a lovely day actually the weather was sunny and windy it wasn’t too hot or cold ideal weather to stroll through the city#i had delicious food and found some comfortable clothes but at the end of the day i just felt so empty and worn out#seeing all these couples and friend groups and families and i’m still all by myself after so many years#tbh i’m even lonelier now than i was 10 years ago back then i at least had a few friends#idk what i’m doing with my life tbh.. i just want to be happy but even when i take myself on a cute little date i end up feeling miserable#bc it just hits me how truly lonely i am#i fear i’m incapable of forming any genuine relationships anymore bc i had so many bad experiences that i just stopped trying to connect..#with anyone.. even though i crave community friendship companionship and love i completely shut myself off from the world#i’m not even sure what i’m trying to say with all this.. i wish i knew how to be a person in this world#i wish i could be happy#tbh ever since i got back from my italy vacation i’ve been feeling depressed bc life could be so beautiful if i didn’t have to sacrifice..#almost all of my time for work#the post vacation depression is too real…#realizing you can only spend a very limited time traveling and enjoying yourself bc you have to work most of the time just to afford living#let me stop.. i keep rambling and my thoughts are falling like a waterfall#idk what’s wrong with me… i should have breakfast and put my phone away#sorry to anyone who actually reads all this word vomit#☁️
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
once again crying bc im thinking abt all the homeless cats and dogs and bunnies.... :(
#and all other animals#and also all the animals that are illegally exported and stuffed into boxes to travel thru customs etc and they are tortured in there#nobody cares abt animals as living beings#like the numbers of these are millions and millions it isnt smth that just happens a handful of times#millions of animald are abandoned and homeless and millions of animals are illegally transported#humans dont deserve animals. in fact we just deserve them rising up and eating all of us#i mean thats what we do now so thats#just karma. there is no *real* reason why humans are the center of the universe#the only reason is bc humans is the no1 narcissistic species#cats are 2nd... the world would still be better if cats overthrew humans and ruled the world#ok lmao none of this matters it just hurts so much to think abt#animals are in our hands and we should care for the#them*. not this... it disgusts me#and ppl are so fucking... stupid#like there's a video of a bunny jumping from a cardboard box in an airport and runs around#and everyone loved that video and thinks its sooooo cute and funny ahhahah#and im like.. y'all rlly have no b#rainscells or basic understanding or any compassion???#ppl smuggle animals like that and that poor bunny was trapped in there w no food or water or space or air supply#and what do u think they'll do when they catch the bunny??#that isnt funny nor cute that is awful#most ppl who claim to 'love animals' only mean that#in a superficial sense. they love looking at animals bc theyre cute#but they dont view animals as living beings with rights or etc etc#humans are awful... ok anyway#thinking abt homeless cats and when a human is kind to them they get this look in their eyes#idk how anyone can be so empty and braindead and soulles to think animals dont feel#humans are animals. we are part of the universe and world. earth doesnt belong to us. we arent the centre of the universe. ew
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
I don't know if anyone's brought up this critique of the pjo show yet, so I wanted to:
Look, I get where the writers' problem came from. As the pjoverse goes on, the more and more you realize just how shitty the gods are. And it's hard to justify why we ought to be on their side at all. So when writing this tv series, they wanted to make it clear they know and we know that the gods are shitty (also probably bc they don't want to be endorsing their behavior to kids? idk).
But the problem is that the original Percy Jackson series is about Percy becoming a hero, and not just any kind of a hero, but a hero of Greek mythology (see my posts about this). The entire story is him learning what it means to be a Greek hero, rejecting the paths of those before him, and becoming his own kind of hero. By not giving us a reason to root for the gods, you're also taking away Percy's character arc. Look, it's not Percy Jackson the regular guy who's too good for all this who saves the day. It's Percy Jackson the fucking hero who belongs to this world and is still brave enough to change it who saves the day
#idk if i'm clear enough#i'm just emptying drafts#also like Percy feels at home in the camp and Greek world#it's when everything about his life so far suddenly makes sense#why are we treating him like he's too special and above it all for it#his mom didn't want him to know about the greek world bc its DANGEROUS and she wanted to keep him SAFE that it's that's the only reason#idk i'm not making sense sorry#pjo show#pjo show crit#agent h#agent report
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
something about being told im 'the leading person at this whole academy when it comes to interpretation and stage intelligence' by the husband of the woman im trying (not really. but i mean. who knows) to seduce... ok boy you got me. lets make it a polycule.
#im playing it all cool and funny now but atm i legit burst into tears lol#like he said i have a 'good voice too of course' but i know realistically that is not my strongest asset#and even if i were technically perfect. which im NOT lol. the voice itself is just nothing special. it's there ig but that's about it#but its nice to know i may not be 100% useless after all#(just 90%)#also apparently the most feared and respected professor who came to the concert said. again. that he likes me the most.#which again. crying real actual tears about this all rn this means literally the world to me this is everything i have#and i have no one to share this with because im not gonna say it to my uni friend cause i dont want her to feel like im boasting or sth#(even tho she has no such qualms herself but probably because i know how. not great. it feels when someone keeps talking about themselves#and about how great they are and how easy everything is for them. i dont wanna do it back at her.#well there's also the fact that i dont think im great and this is not fucking easy to me at all lol#but idk i think the difference between us is that she actually admitted she sees no point in singing if she cant show off (thus she hates#the duet we're singing because she sings the lower part and cant show off her high notes or coloratura.#which is like. an insane take to me. i mean it i get it. kinda. if i had a voice like hers maybe id be like that too fuck knows.#but that just feels so. idk. sad to me. so self obsessed and empty. like you dont care about the music itself? about you being a part of it?#also immediately made singing with her not fun anymore. i thought we were creating something TOGETHER. but thanks for the confirmation#that you only really care about being 'better than'. yikes.#like idk this behaviour is funny and iconic in old school opera legends like yes go bite each others dicks off.#but it hits completely different when it's your own colleague let alone your friend. like damn girl. damn)#) anyway. the husband is kinda hot too now that i think of it. i really should seduce them both.#except its realistically not possible since they've both seen me cry now (she saw it like a hundred times lol)#so ive lost the hot and mysterious card alas. no uni professors romance for me
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
god i've had such bad writers block lately. which i guess in a way i anticipated would happen when i went back to school full-time, but alas. like today i spent an hour staring at a doc, knowing exactly what i wanted to convey but completely forgetting how to actually say anything.
#plus for some reason i decided to write this particular wip in past tense which i hardly ever do with fic and that's really throwing me off#on top of everything else#i know it's such a first world problem and i go through unproductive phases a few times a year but still#i always feel so empty when i can't tap into my creative outlets#plus there's this pressure to strike while the iron is hot and turn something out before the show ends#but i just like. idk i just don't have it in me right now#sorry for randomly being a downer in the middle of sexy times#idk i was just overcome with a wave of sadness as i realized i completely failed to make progress with this wip today
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
also its so dumb that one of the arguments ppl have against a sims 5 is that theyve already invested too much money into 4. like yes its fucking scummy that ea charges so much for dlc and its Ludicrous the amt sims 4 costs if you have all the dlc and its going to keep getting more and more expensive but . to be honest . why are you paying for sims packs. im sry
#ik not everyone can pirate i get it and its your money do what you want#but itis your choice to invest so much into like. a sinking ship DJRNFJFNG. idk....#i want 2 be optimistic and believe that somehow they WILL be able to fix every single issue with ts4#but i honestly believe thats require them to take an extended break from releasing new packs and shit#and i genuinely honestly dont think theyll do that. lol.#but like. i think itd be a good idea like. Cut down on new releases and focus on fixing the base game and then pack refreshes#bc itd be rly cool to have like. pack refreshes to make them more fleshed out#but also like. sigh. it rly does come down to the packs bc i judt genuinely find it kind of disgusting how little is in each pack#and how many of the packs could be consolidated#genuinely earnestly feel like growing together and parenthood shouldve been one pack. like. and honestly throw hsy in there...#hsy could do with a refresh Badd ik its fairly new but oh my god the school is so fucking buggy#and in general like. IDK. id rly love the packs to be refreshed and id love love love More fucking lots in the worlds oh my god. multiple#worlds have literally 4 lots. Thats fucking actually insane it makes me crazy#i get like. ooh bc you can travel between worlds the worlds can be smaller but i hate it 😭😭😭#i think its just bc i grew up playing 3 perhaps but like. i rly loved like. idk when i choose to play in a sims world i want to play in tha#world. i dont want to have to like. i live in moonwood mills (5 lots .) and thej i have to go to like. san myshunonif i want to go to a bar#or whatever. is there a bar in san myshuno idr#IDKIDK. i feel like Innnn my opinion there should be like. at least 1 of the basegame lot types for every world maybe with some exceptions#and there should be enough empty slots ppl can fill it out more if they want...#but also like. idk. i suppose it wouldnt affect me much bc i usually stay on my home lot as much as possible#bc of the loading screens#it wouldnt be so bad if like. idk. i understand why they didnt wanna do open world like ts3#well i dont its fucking actually stupid. but i get that ts4 wasnt supposed to be what it is and it wasnt built to be a longrunning game.#hence why ts5 should happen instead as a Strong Foundation BUT WHATEVER but like. yk. and ik im not the only person in the world and other#ppl want different but i feel like maybe you could have options .. idk. im not a programmer#but itd be cool to have some sort of way to toggle between like. open world semi open world and closed world#where itd be like. ts3 style where the exteriors of everything r there but the interiors r loaded in when u visit (if that is how ts3 works#i may be a bit off) nd closed would be ts4 style Loading screen to go . next door#am i misremembering or are there even loading screens between like. the new apartments with forrent.... there were for the city living ones#skull Fuckk i ran out of space
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
WODtober 2 > City By Night
#wodtober#world of darkness#wod#mine#art#could be a vampire. could be a werewolf. could maybe even be a wraith#whatever you are. get your gd feet off the seat#*23#i tried to lean into that feeling of being in a semi-empty bus at night#i was originally gonna go for like. a bar or a neon city street but idk. kept coming back to this#its so nostalgic n comforting i love it sm... the dark empty streets. the piss yellow/orange streetlights. the rain#and if you think im early for day 2. NO its actually 7 am here. prime time for posting as we all know lol
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
do you feel pain when engaging with your special interests or do you love things in like a normal amount
#idk I just got slapped with a sudden wave of love for kaeya#like... oh boy. oh my pretty boy you are so doomed#idk I love him so damn much#I want everyone to know how I see him#how much love for the life and the world and his found family he's carrying in his heart#and he too feels pain when he acknowledges his love#because he loves them a bit too much for someone whose world could be shattered in pieces from just one small truth#he knows that he doesn't have the right to love them. that his love will turn to be their death someday#and yet his heart is too big for him to not feel alone when it's empty#the only thing he wants is to be loved. to have a family. to be seen and heard and felt.#and he's afraid of everything he wants#yeah couldn't resist the urge to be dumb and poetic in the tags again#because LOOK AT HIM#I LOVE HIM SO DAMN MUCH#neurodivergent#actually neurodivergent#autism#actually autistic#special interest
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
🍜🍥🥢
#the problem is that... yes i do want friends but...#talking to guys i always feels like there will always be this divide between us that can never be bridged#and that we can never fully understand eo#but the thing is with women..... hmmm i dont really fw most women#bc women dont care at all abt other women#and women gaslight and victim blame eo to hell and back#i dont feel safe or comfortable around women either#so idk it just sucks bc i cant fully relate to guys but i cant relate to women either#im alwayyyyyyyys unable to relate and connect to any of them#it's so fkn alienating and it drives me crazy#because i just cant relate or connect or understand anyobe#anyone*#and no one ever understands me#it's such a lonely existence#and i WISH i was like everyone else#idk why i had to be cursed to be this way. i WANT to be normal and think and be just like everyone else#being different and abnormal is extremely painful#i dont fit in anywhere and i cant connect to anyone and im always ... and outsider and outcast#*always*. everywhere. it's so sad#i cant just pretend to be normal and like everyone else bc i just feel sad and empty and dont keep it up#i just think maybe i should die.... this world will NEVER understand me#and to be honest i will never ever understand this world#even if i do understand it on an intellectual level i dont understand it on an emotional one#i hate it sm. i dont wanna be alone#but i simply cannot relate to anyone i meet
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
hm do you think that working simultaneously on 4 different WIPs will end up confusing you, the flow, and the vibe? much to ponder...
#i feel like im on a deadline bc idk if my hyperfixation on zs will survive my big trip and the move fdjsdsjn#i wanted to post siyt in july after the actual kendo world champs bc i thought that was a fun little detail but i wont be here#sad. but good excuse to take a real solid break from all the others and wrap that up i guess#really not my fault i got and fleshed out that new one so fast that ones not on me !#is it trite to post 3 fwb fics almost back to back? lets say empty spaces doesnt even count bc its a bruise offshoot#still is 2 a bit much? like i care<3
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
where's that post about how people come up with the worst characterizations of Trant due to the strong autism he gives off I need to reblog it
#it falls in like imo with why i dont like certain jean/trant stuff#to me i dont feel anything for those two its like looking at drywall#but like i especially get a little weirded out when people push them cause of the SUPER CHEERY and super grumpy like i get it#but also idk Trant is polite i read him as what is he is#an ex addict who busies his brain so he wont go back to his addiction#if anything hes a narrative foil to harry#trant for his own issues seems to be attempting to manage his emptiness with Always Going#always ignoring never quite stepping into the world#harry is the exact opposite#seems odd to then put him with jean imo#but there is a lot to be said for someone who you could read as autistic and looking at him so plainly#Hes cheery! hes creepy!#and the thurd thing i dont remember from that post
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
One day I'm going to finish my FFXVI mega essay, but for now I think my thoughts on the game can be summarized like this:
When making FFXVI, the developers sure knew what they wanted to do, and by god were they going to do it.
Were they also going to do other things that would make those first thing better? Were they going to do other things that make a good game overall? Ehhhhh...they were going to do what they wanted to do, and invest all their time and effort into that, so surely that would be enough! Surely!
#i saw someone call FFXVI the most disappointing 8/10 game they'd ever played#and i agree 100%#it started off SO STRONG#and then. and then!!!#ffxvi#my overall rating is in fact an 8 out of 10. maybe 8.5. definitely not a 9#i enjoyed many parts of it but by god were the lows low#some of the highs were very high too! i don't regret buying or playing the game! i'm glad i did#but yeah most disappointing 8/10 i ever played is an apt description#my opinion might be slightly impacted by my uh. mental state at the time#2023 was not a good year for me. for several months ffxvi was the only thing i had to look forward to in life#and that's really sad but that was just the place i was in. life was absolutely miserable#i played the demo and was over the moon. good things were coming! it was way better than i anticipated!#then i played the game and while i enjoyed a lot of it a lot was just tedious in a bad way#so many repeated plotlines and so much whacking you over the head with the points they wanted to make#like come on guys i am not an idiot do you really need to tell me this exact thing 18 different times#and have me go out of my way to get. reward which is just a slightly different flavor of that same thing 18 times#that's what i mean by them doing a few things very well. by god were they going to do them. and only them#graphics? beautiful. i had to stop at several points bc i was stunned by the quality.#but after you've seen a few forests and some fallen ruins it gets boring when that's it. the world was just so small and empty#yes i do support the rise up against your oppressor plotlines because that is a good thing to do but that was like. 90% of the story#(including sidequests) and it just kind of got old. why did i just spend 3 hours straight doing sidequests that gave me nothing new#made some of the sidequests feel pointless. especially because the rewards in this game sucked#uh oh i'm getting too negative so i'll end it here#ffxvi was a good game but it is not one of my faves. glad i played it but idk when i'll play it again.#erurandomness
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
god i don't know if i can do this anymore
#camera talks#vent#this is NOT a suicidal post btw i swear#this is mainly about this whole fucking friendship situation happening rn in my life#and i genuinely can't handle it#its been totally blown out of proportion and i feel actually Empty#this person told me i said i wanted to punch them. ive never said that Ever and god it just fucking hurts#to see someone i was close to treat me like this idk what to do#(it feels like my relationship with my parents but worse bc i care about this person)#i feel awful like. just everything is fucking bad#and i dont want to feel this way i just dont know what to do i dont want to stop being friends with them but this is so unhealthy#and ive explained the Actual situation to them a million times and its not getting through and ive just given up#what the fuck ever.#im going to go make cookies and play video games now#i love you all so much you mean the world to me <3
2 notes
·
View notes