sp1r4l-1nk

[sp1r4l-1nk]

You know what? I bet disorders like DID and other cluster B disorders wouldn't be considered so rare if doctors just interacted more with the people more likely to have it.

We have government assistance insurance, and we are desperately looking for someone who has experience with DID and more complex disorders, but so far, none of those doctors accept our insurance. Even Psychology Today wasn't helpful.

That doesn't make any sense! People with personality disorders are often prone to struggling with things like getting and keeping jobs because of the disorder being so disruptive. They're also people with a lot of trauma, people like minorities and people in poverty. These people aren't going to have things like their own insurance or the ability to pay for it out of pocket! Why wouldn't you accept government insurance assistance programs??

I bet the entire DID model would be reworked too if psychologists actually encountered more people who were likely to be plural in general.

- Rue

[sp1r4l-1nk]

can’t believe i have to say this but negligence is abuse. if a child is struggling and there is no action taken to help that child, that is abuse. if a child’s needs are ignored, that is abuse. if children are told to “suck it up” or punished for expressing their needs, that is abuse. if a child is suffering and you don’t care— that is abuse.

it doesn’t matter if it’s purposeful or intentional, neglect is neglect and children, especially young children, need adults to help them thrive.

[sp1r4l-1nk]

A lot of pop psychology gets thrown around and since I already have a headache, here's preventing you lot from making it worse.

Love-bombing: A manipulation tactic of increasing affection and grand gestures before or after doing something abusive, specifically to weasel one's way out of consequences.

What it is not: A streak of affection and generosity towards friends/loved ones.

Trauma-bonding: Knowingly traumatizing someone to take advantage of their vulnerable state, to then act like the "hero" or the one who cheers them up.

What it is not: Bonding over similar traumas.

Gaslighting: *Knowingly* convincing someone they cannot trust their own perception of a situation in pursuit of one's own narrative.

What it is not: Misaligned perception of events.

Narcissist: Someone afflicted with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, a traumagenic cluster B disorder, that struggles with self-obsession, paranoia, craving validity from the public, delusions of grandeur, and social disconnection.

It is not: Your rubbish ex that cheated on you.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

-Xanthe

[sp1r4l-1nk]

I agree but I also think that it's hard for people to look into it when there is so much overwhelming information and not as many places break it down or describe it well enough.

The Rings System on youtube is a good starting point

Y'all genuinely need to do more research on DID

I see way too many people asking about the most basic of DID "is insert basic thing normal?" Yes, go do more research /lh

I mean this in a not so mean way, I just genuinely don't think y'all are doing enough research on this disorder if you don't know that passive/unnoticed switches are normal 😭

Go do research!

[sp1r4l-1nk]

I wish people understood that more, the sentiment that faking is intentional. You cannot fake something you don't think you're faking - that's just being mistaken. Even if it was imitative DID, do not come into the system community directing what actual survivors must constantly say to themselves. Imitative DID is still clinically significant and it is not the actual DID community's responsibility to make sure you don't "fake" DID because you took internet stranger's words over your own research. You can't unintentionally fake and saying you can is what harms people and makes sure people never get help. Real DID or not, do not automatically trust online strangers and please seek help if you are in a safe place to do so.

Sorry if this isn't coherent, it just upsets me when a group of disabled people are berated by people that the advice didn't even apply to.

Hot take: The "If you think you're faking, you're not!" stuff that's constantly pushed in the sys community is extremely harmful and completely false. Faking is not always intentional and I wish more people would listen to former fakers. People need to stop demonizing former fakers. I'm friends with multiple people who used to fake and all but one of them said this rhetoric is part of what stopped them realizing for do long. Imitative DID is a thing and it's horrible to have. It can get you into such a deep hole that's hard to get out of. People talking about being concerned that they could be faking shouldn't automatically be dismissed or told they're not. Yes, denial is a real and common thing in DID but that doesn't mean it's always just denial.

I'm just gonna have to tell you this; if it's unintentional then it's not faking. That is the point. That is what a majority of people mean. You can be mistaken, yes, but that doesn't mean you're faking. A mistake ≠ a harmful action. Faking is something done intentionally, usually maliciously, it cannot be done on accident or because you just thought you had the symptoms when it was actually something completely different. "Former fakers" are either people who were confused and mistook it for something else or people who intentionally faked it and are therefore not welcome among me and my community (unless they were like, really young, I any forgive that because kids are stupid). I understand what you mean, but words mean things. Don't misuse them.