sitkainsnow

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No bc I love the HC of Bruce always being in the public eye, and the batkids not really, but none of the news papers or paparazzi actually WANT to see them anyways bc interacting with them is like trying to get a cow to jump over a fence. They don’t understand, they don’t want to, they make it hell, and they totally COULD jump over the fence, they just refuse to and make it your problem. So like they just give the batkids a wide berth and don’t question anything Bruce does in regards to them bc that would mean actually confronting them lmao.

Dick and Steph would be the exception bc they’d actively point/seek out reporters and paparazzi and try to get their attention just to fuck with them

Bruce Wayne core

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LOVE the idea of Batman being very conscious of his appearance bc he’s a major public figure and bc he just likes being pretty. So like his teeth are all really nice and white and straight, he’s got an expensive skincare routine, fancy hair products and soaps, he regularly uses and when he fights he’s conscious of not marring his face or hands beyond a bruise or two. He’s also careful about how wounds heal so the scarring isn’t too bad.

But this is NOT the case for the batkids, who have no real regard for it and do whatever necessary. This means dozens of cracked, chipped or completely lost teeth, countless nose jobs, wackass hairdcut (not you dick) stumpy ugly nails, skin in desperate need of moisturizer (esp Jason) and very poorly healed wounds turning into ugly scars because they just don’t think it matters.

I do like the thought though of Damian noticing this and seeing how well Bruce’s cleans up and finding it very dignified so he starts fussing over his hair and skin too lol

Inspired by @frownyalfred ‘s post abt teeth lol

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When people talk about Who’d win in a fight l, Batman or Superman, they kinda forget how dependent performance is on how you’re feeling that day, where you are, what you’ve been doing, and just how much you actually want to win.

If bats and Supes fought for the fun of it, Bats would win bc Supes wouldn’t take it seriously enough.

If they fought as training Bats would win bc Supes wouldn’t be relying on his Superpowers very much bc it’s training.

If Bats fought Dictator Supes, Bats would win given he has access to Kryptonite and has been planning it.

If Supes attacked Bats out of the blue, Supes would win bc Bats wouldn’t have time to deploy his safety measures.

If Evil post-apocalyptic Supes fought Bats, Bats would lose bc he would’ve been suffering for months or even years prior to their fight.

Hell, if Supes and Bats fought in the woods Supes would win bc it’s a terrible environment for Bats.

If bats and Supes just lost all inhibitions and went all out, Bats would lose.

And ofc, in arguments, Bats always win bc of his pattented Batglare and need to always have the final word. Plus I mean, how can Clark stay mad at him when mid argument he finds Bats is actually really wounded and needs help?? (Bats does this on purpose)

People like to glaze batman (me included lmao) but they forget how much of his strength is imbedded in his genius intellect and fighting technique. That alone, even if your evenly matched in a fight, makes a WORLD of difference. Idk I’m just tired of seeing people ramp up both characters bc of favoritism without actually thinking about the characters themselves. This can also be said abt most Batfam members too!!

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Okay here’s my thoughts/HC on Batfam ethnicity and religion BUT I wanna know your thoughts on it:

Bruce is white/Ashkenazi Jewish. Thomas and Martha were Jewish, and while they weren’t like super religious they still celebrated the holidays and did all that. Bruce is an atheist now, but he still celebrates some of the holidays.

Dick is ancestrally Mediterranean (not opposed to the idea of him being Romani but idk anything abt them so idk the vibes) but he has very few features suggesting that.

Jason is white. (Personally hate hc he’s Latino bc like that man is WHITE) and his mom was raised catholic, so sometimes on Christmas she’d take him to church. He’s not religious, but his beliefs still align with it iykwim

Tim ofc is just plain paper white

Damian is very much middle eastern, however he’s got Bruce’s curly Jewish hair. He’s familiar with the Koran and general Islamic beliefs but is atheist like Talia.

Steph is white but was raised around a bunch of different people/cultures so while she isn’t religious her idea of it is very mixed.

Cass ofc is Chinese but also has some slight Indian. she’s very much an atheist now with Bruce, but to me David isn’t religious but very much had Christian beliefs abt god n stuff, so it’s something that’s influenced her view on religion even w/out being Christian

Duke is Dominican/African-American mix

Babs is white but love the idea of her mom being from the UK.

Btw when I say religious I mean someone who actively practices it rather than just beliving it, yeah? But like I wanna know what y’all think of this; also I’m not entirely sure but its sometimes cannon that Dick is a Romani right??? Maybe?? Same with Bruce being Jewish. Idk though

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having Batman as your dad is so cool (training, adventure, being treated like an equal) but people also forget that Batman is Bruce without the cowl, and Bruce is the kind of asshole who’ll watch you faceplant after a missed flip and go “hn….suboptimal.”

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I don't really like a lot of the early-batman interpretations, bc a lot of the time he's slow and can't fight, and also just doesn't really do any detective work? He's never really all that smart.

Instead I think an early Batman would have two mains faults with his fighting and thinking. When it comes to fighting, he's trained for the last however many years in all sorts of martial arts and has trained his body to withstand all sorts of stuff. but he has no battle experience. Most the goons in Gotham don't even know the first thing abt marital arts anyways, so they just throw the most random, out of pocket attacks and Bruce has no idea how to counter or how to prepare for it, so he just takes it head-on. Just imagine Batman squaring up with some random goon and they go in front a right hook and Bruce is just “Ah, yes, by the way his right knee is caving he’s attempting a feint and will follow up with a kick, so I need to block that instead” but the goon literally just has shit balance and Bruce gets hit square in the face bc he didn’t actually think the goon would be so obvious.

As for his thinking, Bruce is really smart and has been since he was young. But he's also has a very specific and logical thinking pattern, and expects other smart people to think like him. So like Riddler would set up all these bombs across Gotham and Bruce would be trying to deduce their location, figuring he'd be attacking all the weak or crowded points, when instead Riddler just sets them up in a random part of Gotham in the shape of a question mark and it takes Bruce forever to figure it out because there's no logical reason he'd do that. That's also why he has such trouble dealing with Joker, bc the dude is crazy and nothing he does is logical or reasonable and Bruce struggles to think like him and therefore struggles to deal with him.

idk the biggest thing I hate about most interpretations of early Batman is simply that they just make him a clumsy, brooding character (looking at you, Batman 2022) when he canonically has gone through years of training, both in fighting and detective work, and has been smart since he was a kid! Brooding is like on-point though, soooo

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I don't actually know the extent of Booster's powers so if he can yeet people into the the next galaxy please ignore

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Talia may have been an awful mother (loving yes, but giving a child a good and healthy environment? NO. BUT Ra’s also gets most the blame) but by the gods did she save Damian from younger Bruce. Like he in most cases was born before Jason's death, or at least around then, so can you imagine grieving Bruce, who at that point believed himself to be more Batman than Bruce, trying to take care of a kid? Tim already was essentially babysitting him at that point in time trying to keep the guy from killing himself, not to mention the whole slew of emotional problems he had that worsened by tenfold when Jason died. Like tbh Damian probably would've been wayyyy worse off😭

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SuperBat Civillian AU where Bruce is an Actor and Clark is a bodyguard who was first assigned to Bruce by happenstance- a crazy, screaming fangirl comes running up to Bruce chanting his name and Clark very politely stops her like the brick wall he is, scolding her for acting so rudely, and spins her around and sends her off, and Bruce just thinks “damn, that’s really hot.” And continues to request Clark in the future.

Que Bruce aggressively flirting in a way which no one would ever actually figure is flirting bc emotional repression and in this AU he’d never needed to pretend to be a playboy, so Clark just thinks he’s being friendly and enjoys working for him. Meanwhile Bruce gets more and more aggravated and whines to Dick abt how Clark is extremely oblivious despite all of his suggestive comments and Dick asks what he’s saying that Clark isn’t getting and he just goes

��I told him I liked his hair” and Dick let’s our a single laugh and walks away.

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This over and over and over again!!

this has probably been said before but too sweet is the essence of all superbat dynamics

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God they’re so gay

Superbat Moments #20

Griping at each other like an old married couple

Superbat Master Collection

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SuperBat fanfic where Comic Superman and Batman are thrown into the Snyderverse and meet the JL there. Snyder Supes takes it all in… how should I summarize? Perhaps this tells enough. I’ve taken my trazodone and cannot think straight.

After reading, tell me if I should do one from Snyder Batman’s POV…

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Desperately need a fic from a police officer’s pov and they watch SuperBat interactions bc like all the cops either hate or love Bats, but are still kinda terrified of him, but ofc Supes is all sunshine and smiles and “He’s my best friend y’all!” And they KNOW bats probably totally has kryptonite and an attitude worse than the devil.

So they end up in a situation where they’re working together and Batman in taking with the police and Superman’s standing behind him waving and smiling at everyone while Batman is giving single-word or just huffs for answers. And then Superman freezes and cocks his head and to everyone’s surprise grabs Batman by the shoulder and whispers something in his ear and then what’s more surprising is Batman doesn’t even mind as he wraps his own arm around Supes and then they’re gone in a blur of blue and Black. All the cops are just left standing there like 🧍‍♂️shocked bc Bats didn’t mind Supes touching him.

Or another instance where it’s after this big battle in Gotham and it’s with whatever villain but Superman is there too and the villain had kryptonite. Anyways so after the battle Bats is talking to the police and handing over the villain and Superman comes over after talking to the civilians, picks Bats up by the scruff mid sentence politely nods to the officers he was talking too, and moves him a couple feet away and just starts yelling at Bats abt how stupid it is for him to run around jumping in the way of heavy blows EVEN if they have kryptonite and Bats just scoffs and turns his head away and all the police on the area watch as Superman and Batman argue about how stupid it is to risk your life to save the other (they both did it) completely oblivious to their audience and the police whose POV it’s in just thinks “god they sound like a married couple. Wouldn’t it be crazy if the two of the worlds greatest hero’s were actually a couple lmao. But that’s crazy they’re just really good friends”

Gordon watched all this trying not to blow his fuse bc yes, Batman does need to be yelled at, and yes, he does need to prioritize his safety more, but NO, you don’t need to be having your lovers quarrel in front of the whole damn GCPD.

Or in another instance Batman racks up a bunch of charges on him for whatever reason and the GCPD by luck manages to arrest him and so here comes Superman trying to bail his partner(in more ways than one) out of prison and the police are like “we’re really sorry Mr. Superman sir but we can’t legally do that” and Supes goes “what the hell did he even do” and so the officer goes “Property Damage, unlawful violence, arson, punched a cop in the face and broke his nose, caught carrying weed which is illegal in the state of New Jersey, multiple -and I mean multiple- unpaid speeding tickets. Oh, and the DMV wanted us to talk to him about his unregistered Batmobile and Batbike.”and Supes is about to cry as he quietly asks “Okay, so how much is bail” And the officer looks away and mumbled “sixteen grand” and Supes gasps and cries out “I don’t get paid enough for sixteen grand!!”

However thirty minutes later Supes is back at the GCPD station shakily counting out bills bc he can’t use a check or card (obvi) sweating heavily and looking extremely pained. The cops don’t even ask where he got all those bills so quickly and just watch him and another 30minutes later Bats is out and Supes is shaking him by his shoulder shouting “so who’s gonna lag me back!! Who’s gonna reimburse me for for 16k?? Whose gonna apologize for the heart palpitations you gave me?? Whose gonna apologize for all the gray hairs this is going to give me?? You’re giving me gray hairs all the time B!! I can’t do this!!” And Batman just sighs and pats Superman on the back as they walk out of the station and Superman is mumbling about bank credit and loans and how bad he looks with wrinkle lines and gray hair sounding like he’s about to cry.

Meanwhile the police try not to loose their minds throughout this whole interaction and Gordon’s just staring at the door blankly smoking a cigar and the police whose POV it’s in looks at the cigar a little bit closer and goes “That smells like weed” and Gordon looks at her and just says “I feel for Superman a bit more than I want to”

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I think about this quote everyday. You're right Arthur, they ARE best friends and it IS kind of adorable

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No you mean you have a child: Robin

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The iconic hug

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happy pride month! i think these two have problems