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Hot take: Elf On The Shelf was introduced to get kids used to the surveillance state.

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I've been binge listening to The Magnus Archives, and I'm obsessed. I feel a dark stirring in my mind, akin to the obsession I felt for Invader Zim in my teens. It's more than just really liking the show; I feel it seeping into my brain and tainting my thoughts like a fungus. I can't stop thinking about Jonathan Sims and his smooth deep voice and his compulsive effect. He asks a question, and I can feel the static in my brain as much as in my ears. This show is changing me.

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Someone passed me in traffic with this licence plate, and my sister and I were utterly baffled. They also have a sticker of a deer skull on their window, so maybe they go into the woods to look for antler sheds? All I could picture at first was the Predator doing the Snidely Whiplash tiptoe into the yard of a Home Depot.

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Today I lost Uhura, my emotional support animal and doggy best friend. She was 8, and she got an infection that progressed too quickly to be properly treated. My hometown has no emergency veterinary services and she deteriorated over the weekend, so nothing could be done. Rest in peace, my sweet girl 😭💕

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Pro tip for those of you who own a Swiffer: use a washcloth on it instead of a regular Swiffer cloth for extra scrubbing power. Pre-moistened Swiffer cloths have all the scrubbing power of a disinfectant wipe, so using a washcloth helps you get the hard to reach areas AND minimizes your time in Cinderella mode.

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A piece of advice I was taught as a kid that I now realize probably sounds absolutely batshit outside of New Mexico: always buy from people selling tamales or burritos in parking lots. You're supporting local people AND getting fresh homemade food, and I've never once been disappointed by parking lot tamales/burritos.

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And then they're so glad you assured them you can keep a secret, when in reality your depression has eroded your memory and your ADHD has eroded your attention span to the point where you didn't retain a word they said.

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I made myself a pride flag! I'm demigirl and autistic and my favorite color is purple. I hue-shifted the demigirl flag to be more purple and made a symbol that's a mix of the infinity symbol and the female symbol. I like how it came out.

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Ms. Mowz, what the hell are you talking about. There's nothing here. Seriously, WHAT does she think she's signaling about? This area is devoid of Star Pieces, Shine Sprites, and hidden blocks. I checked everywhere, including the background. Can someone please help me figure this out? It's gonna bug me so bad.

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I really hate the word "unalive". I wish people could just say "die" or "kill" like they always have. It's stupid that censorship has led us this astray.

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Anyone else think Mienfoo looks like a kung fu Pooh Bear? I mean look at this little guy.

"Bitch better have my hunny" lookin ass

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I can't believe this LEGENDARY post just showed up on my dash. I feel like I've been blessed.

Doctor: $140,000 a year

Furry artist on Patreon: $160,000 a year

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I like to use music albums to keep track of the passage of time while I'm doing stuff, but I have a really bad sense of the passage of time, so I've decided to label all my albums with their total length. I think this will help me learn to gauge how long intervals of time actually are.

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Update: I'm bad at estimating amounts, and I have no gallon ziploc baggies. Send help.

I'm making waffles to freeze for the mornings! Apparently all you have to do to make frozen waffles is make regular-ass waffles and freeze em. I know it sounds obvious, but for some reason I thought there was more processing involved.

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I'm making waffles to freeze for the mornings! Apparently all you have to do to make frozen waffles is make regular-ass waffles and freeze em. I know it sounds obvious, but for some reason I thought there was more processing involved.

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My headcanon for the weather segments in Welcome to Night Vale has always been that the music is just a carrier for the signal that beams the weather info directly into the townspeoples' minds. We as outside listeners are not within the original broadcast radius and are only receiving the audio portion of the broadcast after the fact.