risingfire17-the-weeb-trash

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 40- Anime that changed you the most: Fruits Basket (2001)

See Day 28 for synopsis.

Long personal story rant incoming!

TL;DR: I learned how to people by watching Fruits Basket and it didn't go well.

So, I didn't have a lot of friends growing up, and the time I finally started socializing with peers coincided with the time I got really heavy into anime and manga, which was my junior and senior years of high school. A side effect of this combination was that I learned a lot about friendships (and relationships but that's a whole other problem for a different post) from the medium.

Fruits Basket was one of my first and favorite manga series, so it had a huge role on my social development. I got it in my head that it was only the "selfless" doormat codependent girls who have true friendship and love, so I basically spent ages 16-25 trying to be Tohru Honda. I also thought that it was normal in friendships to have like no boundaries, be obsessively protective, and spy on your friends' dates and stuff like that. *God I'm cringing so hard as I type this I was so young and dumb omg* So, as you can expect, that didn't lead to me having any healthy relationships in my life. I put off good people without understanding why (now I know they were disturbed by my lack of boundaries) and I attracted the most selfish, narcissistic, dysfunctional, toxic, and abusive people, the people who love to take advantage of people like Tohru, into my life. And I didn't have any angsty, delinquent with a heart of gold like Kyo or super strong or superpowered, overprotective friends like Uotani and Hanajima to scare them off.

It took half a decade of therapy, a 12 step program, and a religious phase (emphasis on phase) for me to unlearn all the toxic behaviors I learned trying to be Tohru, and to learn appropriate alternatives. And in the beginning, it was so hard like I had a full on identity crisis like if I'm not the "selfless" person than who am I??? I even put off grad school for 5 years (I was finishing my BA in psych at the time) because I wasn't sure if being a therapist was what I really wanted or if that was just be trying to be "selfless" again. And after 5 years of soul-searching (and tons of therapy) I'm filling out my grad school applications for next year!!! I think after the childhood I had on top of almost a decade of social skills learned from anime, I needed to take some time off for a recovery arc and I think my journey will make me a better therapist, so I have no regrets!

Now, spewing my whole life story is NOT in any way a criticism of Fruits Basket. I'm basically a case study of what happens when you have negligent parents, no close relationships, and you need to learn how to people by watching TV. Because healthy relationships don't sell in any medium, people want the angst and the drama, but I didn't have parents that talked to me about the differences between fiction and reality, nor healthy friendships to compare with what I was learning on TV. There are plenty of healthy, well-adjusted people who watch Fruits Basket and love it and remain healthy and well-adjusted. My horrible life choices are totally on me; I would have picked up some problematic social behavior from some TV show, and Fruits Basket just happened to be the one.

That being said, I still LOVE Fruits Basket!!!! (especially after the 2019 reboot OMG it was so good!!!!!) It's my wish fulfillment fantasy where everyone is inherently good underneath their rough exterior, and kindness is rewarded with love every time. But, now I have real, healthy, not all-consuming relationships with real people, and I wouldn't trade them for any fantasy angsty relationship ever!

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 39- Your guilty pleasure series: Diabolik Lovers (2013)

Synopsis (from IMDB): “[Yui Komori] arrives at an old mystical house to live there. Inside the house she quickly discovers that the habitants, 6 brothers, that are vampires and that she is meant to be their bridal slave.”

Is it horribly written? Yes. I’ve watched porn with more plot progression than this anime. Is it horribly problematic? Absolutely, and that’s coming from a ship trash connoisseur. Like, the whole plot is just a hapless girl being kidnapped, fed on, and sexually assaulted by incredibly emotionally stunted vampires, but she learns to accept it because they have tragic backstories so how can she not forgive them?

However...I think this anime awakened a fetish in me >_< Also the art is HOT!!!!

From what I’ve heard, the otome games the show is based on are way better written, albeit still problematic af. (I don’t play games so I’m relying on the expertise of @blueeyesgirl​ here)

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 38- Anime you wish had a few more seasons: No Game No Life (2014)

Synopsis (from IMDB): “[Step]Siblings Sora and Shiro make up the most feared team of pro gamers in the world, The Blank. When they manage to beat God himself in a game of chess, they are sent to a world where all disputes are settled with games.”

Look people, we are living in the great age of continuing series we thought dead, like Classroom of the Elite, Devil is a Part-Timer, Cardcaptor Sakura, it’s been impossible to go wrong with an isekai anime ever since SAO, this was a well-received series, even the author of the light novels has no idea why the series hasn’t been continued, AND the ending! They didn’t have to set up for a sequel, but they did! They basically laid out the plot of the next season, and it’s been almost 10 years! Come on, Madhouse, let’s go!!!!!

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 37- Worst dub of all time: Cardcaptors (2000), English dub of Cardcaptor Sakura

Ok, this is my last Cardcaptor Sakura post!!! See synopsis here.

DISCLAIMER: I love Cardcaptor Sakura. And, in its own way, I also love the English dub Cardcaptors. After all, it was my first anime, and it is the reason I got into anime at all. It had my first anime crush, Eriol (Eli in the dub). And all of Sakura’s outfits are the reason I started drawing; I was so mesmerized by all the pretty costumes that I wanted to create my own. And it was one of the few shows marketed for girls on the WB’s Saturday morning cartoons, which, growing up without cable and in the pre-streaming era, was one of the few cartoon viewing options available. I found Sakura to be a very relatable person; she was cheerful, had a lot of energy, was awkward at times, a little slow to understand more subtle social cues, daydreamt a lot, and loved those dear to her intensely. Shortly after Cardcaptors, Sailor Moon came on and overshadowed it, and while I also loved and still love SM, Cardcaptors was my favorite because Sakura was near my age and relatable in a way Usagi and her friends wouldn’t be until I was older.

But, after growing up, reading the manga, and watching the original subtitled version, I’ve realized that the dub is almost a different story entirely than the sub. Because instead of just translating the script from Japanese to English, they HEAVILY edited the plot to make it more “kid friendly” for American children. They basically cut almost all romance out of the plot entirely, except for Meiling’s incredibly one-sided and obsessive crush on Sayoran. (Sure, leave the toxic ship in) Now, look, I understand that no CLAMP story is ever really kid friendly, even the ones that feature children as the main characters. The target audience in Japan was teen/YA girls and women, which was not a demographic interested enough in anime (especially ones about children) to market to them in the US in the late 90s/early 2000s. So, they marketed it to elementary school girls. 

And so maybe a little editing was necessary, though thankfully the original anime had already edited out some of the wildest elements of the manga (looking at you, Terada-sensei and Rika) And maybe the eventual romance between Sakura and Sayoran should have been toned down a bit. Like, elementary/middle school kids might have crushes and “date” (i.e.: holding hands and sharing cookies) but they’re probably not falling in love. But to eliminate all romance? The bears were not  “thank you” gifts and we all know it! Also, cutting out the part where Yukito (Julian in the dub) tells Sakura that he loves Touya (Tori in the dub)??? That was a totally healthy, age-appropriate depiction of late teen/early college age courting! Children see these much older characters and think, oh I’ll have a love like that when I grow up! But...too gay for America in 2000. And Tomoyo’s(Madison in the dub) unrequited crush on Sakura, removed. That could have been toned down to age appropriate level without getting cut. Tomoyo’s support of Sakura and her relationship with Sayoran is an excellent lesson for children about consent and not pushing your feelings on someone who doesn’t return them and not refusing to be friends because of it. Also Ruby Moon was explicitly female in the dub, when they were canonically genderless in the source material, but, if they’re going to cut the gay, of course they’re going to cut the genderqueer smh. Touya was also openly bi in the original, but that is proven by showing his past relationship with his middle school teacher, so I can’t really blame the dub for overwriting that part. Like I said, CLAMP isn’t kid-friendly. 

Cardcaptor Sakura was a feminist and LGBTQ+ icon far ahead of its time. And Cardcaptors...was a good children’s show and gateway to anime for a lot of American girls, but it was a children’s show. It was very “villain of the week,” which, given the slow progression of the main plot, was alleviated in the original by the romantic subplots absent in the dub. Cardcaptors could have been the icon it was in Japan, and I’m sure it would have been a much more faithful adaptation had it been released in the late 2010s to now, but alas.

Also, the English voices SUCK. I don’t know how I didn’t notice that as a child lol

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 36 Anime that got the source material horribly, horribly wrong- Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle (2005-2006)

Let me start by saying I love, LOVE the manga! It is actually my all time favorite manga. It told a great story, had some fantastic character development, did not shy away from difficult topics (it was definitely not kid friendly), and kept me guessing from start to finish. 

The anime...didn’t do that. The anime was a watered-down, kid-friendly version of the manga, due to being released during a children’s programming time on NHK. It was loaded with filler and made into a more episodic, supernatural slice of life kind of adventure story. It feels like there is almost no plot progression at all. And it ended before the Tokyo Reveal arc, which basically explains why Sakura and Sayoran are the way they are, and why all the events of the series even take place- but it was not adapted in the anime because it wasn’t kid friendly. And this is why the show never should have been in a children’s programming time slot to begin with- it’s not kid friendly, and trying to make it so undermines the entire point of the story. 

A series of OVAs were released by a different studio, covering the Tokyo Revelations arc, and those were great and much appreciated, but the story was never able to continue after that. 

Still keeping hope alive for a reboot....

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 35- An anime you regret watching: Onegai Sensei (Please Teacher) (2002)

So, I have a hard time regretting watching anything, because I either like it or I don’t like it but don’t hate it enough to regret it. I’m also pretty picky about what I watch, so I usually like it.

The one time I really dislike anime is when I hate the main characters, and even then my opinion can be salvaged if I like a side character who has a decent amount of screentime. So, for these reasons, I almost went with School Days or Welcome to the NHK (see my rant about that here) but I had to go with Onegai Sensei.

In this anime, I hate both main characters. I also don’t really like any of the supporting cast enough to make up for it- they’re not bad, they’re just meh. But I pity one girl in particular- one who would’ve ended up with the main character had her teacher not MANIPULATED and SPIED on her and their love interest. And I had to watch this poor girl get her heart broken. So, not only did I have to see terrible people be terrible people, but I had to watch a poor child suffer for it. That sealed this anime’s fate for me. 

On top of the horror the anime alone brought me...I didn’t choose to watch this anime. @sailorstarr-chan4 made me, because the main guy reminded her of her ex that she was 100% not over (and who I also hated so figures a character I hate would remind her of him- admittedly I could see quite a resemblance) And I had to listen to her for HOURS on the phone talking about why this anime qualified as “good.” 

And to top it all off, I could only access the English dub. Now, though I strongly prefer sub, I have seen a few good dubs. This one was not one of them.

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 34- Most messed up anime you’ve ever watched: Happy Sugar Life (2018)

*Trigger warning: mentions of pedophilia and sexual assault*

Synopsis (from MAL):  Satou Matsuzaka is a beautiful high schooler who has...a chance encounter with a young girl named Shio Koube [that] makes Satou realize that this is her first and only true feeling of love...Satou secretly shares an apartment with Shio. Despite her innocent appearance, Satou is willing to do anything to protect her beloved, resorting to desperate measures to ensure that their ‘happy sugar life’ remains intact.”

Okay look (I feel like I start a lot of these off that way lol) I’m a connoisseur of messed up anime. And something I’ve realized in my history of watching messed up anime is that most of the time, there are some redeeming qualities, especially if the anime ignores some of the more disturbing parts of the source material, particularly regarding children. For example, Kodomo no Jikan addresses the changing role of the school in student life in Japanese culture and the delicate balance between the school’s respect for family privacy and the duty to intervene in suspected child abuse cases. Bunny Drop and If It’s For My Daughter, I’d Even Defeat a Demon Lord both showcase found family and adjusting to the responsibilities of parenthood, particularly in a society that historically has not been friendly to adoption or adopted children. IF we ignore the fact that in the manga versions of all 3 anime, the adult caretakers of these 5-8 year old children become romantically involved with said children when they become teenagers. The anime studios felt the anime would be better received if they just stopped before reaching that point, which was probably a good move. So even anime that show some...less than healthy blips along the way (probably most evident in Kodomo no Jikan), there are some good things to be found.

Happy Sugar Life is NOT one of those anime. Happy Sugar Life is a “love story” (aka Stokholm/Lima Syndrome story) between a 17 year old girl and the 5 YEAR OLD GIRL SHE KIDNAPPED. Multiple people die as she tries to keep the kidnapping secret. Also for some reason EVERYONE wants to get with this 5 year old, except for the ones who want to get with the teenage characters in the show. I don’t think there is a single adult character who isn’t a pedophile and/or hebephile. The only person in this show who actually likes someone her own age dies for discovering the truth. And there was no real point of it all. All we really got out of it were glossed-over tragic backstories of the perpetrators that are somehow supposed to make us forgive their actions. And look, I love a good tragic backstory and redemption arc, and with the right amount of screentime dedicated to each, I’ve found I can forgive a lot. And admittedly, I’ve also shipped plenty of ships between an adult and a consenting teenager (who is usually of the age of consent in Japan.) But I have yet to come across a story that can make me forgive the two greatest atrocities of this anime: sexual assault against an unconsenting teenager, and a romantic relationship forced on a prepubescent child. (With sexual relationship implied but thankfully not depicted.) And if an anime is going to try to redeem that, it better try a whole hell of a lot harder than it actually did. Although (having lived through the 2010s and the golden age of villain redemption) I realize there are people who may be able to forgive this kind of horror, which can cause problems if they also start to forgive it in real life. Which we already see in too many court cases.

Basically, my criticism of Happy Sugar Life can be summed up as: it had too much harmful shock value with no justification for it. And this is coming from someone who loves shock value and finding what motivates these horrifying actions most are too scared to look at. I mean, look at Kodomo no Jikan- is it horrifying to watch an 8 year old throw herself lewdly at her teacher every 5 minutes? Yes. Is it useful to remember that there are children who act like this because that is what’s modelled for them and that educators, social service workers, and anyone else who interacts with children needs to be able to recognize that this behavior means something is horribly wrong at home and intervene appropriately? Also yes. Happy Sugar Life just didn’t have any sort of moral to teach underneath the shock value and exposed viewers to disturbing content for no reason.

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 33- An anime you loved but will never watch again: Clannad and Clannad: After Story (2007-2009)

Trigger Warning: Mention of domestic violence

Synopsis (by me): Tomoya Okazaki is a sadboi delinquent with a heart of gold and a tragic backstory who helps a bunch of cute girls and some other friends overcome their tragic backstories. Eventually, he settles down with Nagisa Furukawa, who keeps getting held back for missing school due to chronic illness. In After Story, they face tragedy after tragedy in the adult world. Everyone hurts.

Ok look, I know I talk a lot of shit about Clannad. And the truth is, I really love it; I really do. It’s a fantastic anime with a great story, a whole cast of amazing, fleshed-out characters, beautiful artwork, and so many sweet feels. And I love an anime with good feels. But there are some things that fuck you up so bad you never want to face them again, and Clannad is one of them. That show was like an abusive boyfriend who beats you up and then is super sweet like “baby come back I love you so much” and he makes you forget why you ever wanted to leave and then he beats you again. That’s what Clannad felt like. (And don’t @me for making light of dv; I’m writing about my own past relationships here and if I want to make jokes of my own trauma as a coping mechanism that it my prerogative- not my fault if you didn’t read the trigger warning.) At least with Clannad I had the sense not to go back for more...took a few more mistakes to learn with the boys but I finally did!!!

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 32- Most hilarious anime moment: The corset scene from Black Butler (2008)

Synopsis (by me): Dark noble rich kid Ciel Phantomhive makes a contract with a demon butler to find and get revenge on his parents’ killers, and takes his late father’s job of secretly doing Queen Victoria’s dirty work.

10 years and my answer hasn’t changed. This will never not be the most hilarious scene in all of anime history.

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 31- Saddest anime moment *Warning: Clannad: After Story spoilers*

Ushio’s death in Clannad: After Story (2008-2009)

Synopsis (by me): Sequel to the gut-wrenching feels of the high school slice of life Clannad, this time with even more gut wrenching feels courtesy of the adult world. No longer a slice of life, this follows Tomoya and Nagisa as they face the challenges of work, parenthood, and terminal illness. No one’s feels get out alive.

Ok look...there were a lot of moments in this anime that fucked me up. But COME ON! We already had to watch Nagisa die! We already had to watch Tomoya become an alcoholic deadbeat like his dad. We already had to watch Ushio desperately reach out for her emotionally unavailable father. And then we got to finally watch her bring life back into his eyes. And we had hope. (That was our first mistake) This family has been WRECKED, and it has fallen apart, and then when we FINALLY have the start of redemption and rebuilding, THE KID DIES!!! THIS ANIME HAS TAKEN EVERYTHING!!!! CAN’T ANYONE BE HAPPY????? Also, at the very end?! Like, you just HAD to get one more death punch to the feels in there, didn’t you Clannad?????

@sailorstarr-chan4, this is entirely your fault >:(

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 30- Character you’d cosplay given the chance: Inori Yuzuriha from Guilty Crown (2011-2012)

See Day 1 Post for synopsis.

I’ve literally been working on this cosplay from scratch for 6 years and I’ve changes sizes 3 times during the process T_T

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 29- Favorite animal mascot: Kero from Cardcaptor Sakura

Yes I’m posting about CCS again, you know the drill, Day 5 for synopsis. (This is my second to last CCS post on this challenge)

Dude this guy has so much chaotic energy and I’m here for it! Like, the whole series starts because he takes a 30 year long nap on the job (which sounds lovely btw), and when he wakes up he argues with a 9 year old girl and is like well guess this is your problem now, oh btw I live here now, feed me! Sweets and video games appear to be his entire personality and the sole determinant of his alliances, and then when someone so much as looks at Sakura the wrong way (Sayoran and Meiling) he’s like “fight me you fuck!” long after Sakura has forgiven them (kinda reminds me of me with my bestie’s ex lmao) But when he needs to, he’s serious and he makes sure Sakura has what she needs to get the job done. This dude is literally me as an animal mascot lmao

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 28- Favorite sidekick/comedic relief: Momiji Sohma from Fruits Basket (2006, 2019)

Synopsis (from IMDB):  “After a family tragedy turns her life upside down, 16 year old high schooler Tohru Honda takes matters into her own hands and moves out...into a tent. Unfortunately for her, she pitches her new home on private land belonging to the mysterious Soma clan, and it isn't long before the owners discover her secret. But, as Tohru quickly finds out when the family offers to take her in, the Somas have a secret of their own--when hugged by the opposite sex, they turn into the animals of the Chinese Zodiac, [and] helps them deal with the emotional pain caused by the transformations.”

Despite being one of the major comic relief characters of this over the top feels show, Momiji is a Sohma with all the trauma that comes with it. He has such a big heart, putting the well being of others above his own (even those who don’t deserve it *side eye Momiji’s parents*) And he uses his childish comic relief side to show Tohru the parts of his family even the others can’t show her, usually playing games like chase or hide-and-seek to get her to stumble upon secrets. He brings levity to a rough emotional landscape without detracting from the plot the way so many comic relief characters do.

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 27- Favorite Villain: Shogo Makishima from Psycho-Pass (2012)

Synopsis (Paraphrased from MAL):  In the future, the Sibyl System examines citizens’ mental states to predict criminal intent. Inspectors subjugate, often lethally, anyone harboring the slightest ill-will (called latent criminals) before they even commit crime. Enforcers are latent criminals who are granted relative freedom in exchange for doing the Inspectors' dirty work. Akane Tsunemori is an Inspector with an honest desire to uphold justice. However, working alongside Enforcer Shinya Kougami, she learns that the Sibyl System's judgments are not as perfect as her fellow Inspectors assume.

Image Credit: Scarlet Rozen on Pinterest

So, according to Sibyl, this guy isn’t even a villain, even though he teaches others to kill, provides tools to incite riots, and even slits a woman’s throat right in front of police. So why is he not a villain? Because he’s a sociopath! He can commit crime without it affecting his mental state, so Sibyl can’t see his ill intent. He uses the loopholes within the system to commit crime and get off scot-free.

But what’s really interesting here is that he does all this to point out the flaws of the Sybil system. He wants the same thing Enforcer Masaoka wants: a return to a world where people are punished for crimes they actually commit, not ones they might commit in the future. He sees people as dead and unable to feel because of all the efforts to keep them mentally clean. He wants to set people free from their mental subjugation and allow people to truly live. And to do this he’ll sacrifice anything and anyone. And boy am I a sucker for villains who have that “burn the whole world to save it” kind of mentality!

Also, what’s not to like? He’s well-read, musically talented, refined, brilliant, and charismatic. He’s able to lie and charm his way into a teaching job at an elite high school. 

AND LOOK AT HIM!!!!

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 26- Favorite fandom to write fic of: Axis Powers Hetalia (2009)

Technically my favorite fandom to write for is a game, not an anime, but this is my favorite anime to write for!

Synopsis (from Crunchyroll): “Forget what you learned in history class, and imagine all the nations of the world as guys on an inappropriate reality show. Pledge allegiance to your favorite superpower in Hetalia Axis Powers!”

Reasons I love to write for this fandom:

1) It’s a great way to vent my political musings, as in my Columbus Indigenous Peoples’ Day fic, or just to incorporate current events, as in this fic I wrote at the start of the War in Ukraine. 

2) It is literally the easiest fandom to write for because it can be crossed over with ANYTHING! Don’t believe me? Read this Prussia/Hungary fic I wrote that is crossed over with a BBC Earth video about stag beetles!

3) Ok look, anyone who knows me knows I ship some...questionable ships. But in Hetalia, everything goes! Like, you’re related? Cool, you’re a ship. One practically raised the other? That’s a ship. The countries hate each other or have literally NO contact irl? It’s a ship. It’s like all the rules of what is and is not acceptable to ship go out the window with Hetalia, and I love that!

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 25- Best Dressed Character: Sakura Kinomoto from Cardcaptor Sakura (1998, 2016)

Once again, Day 5 for synopsis (I know I keep writing about this anime but it’s amazing go watch it!!!)

Image Credit: StickerClub on Pinterest

This was the first anime I ever watched, and her costumes are what inspired little 8 year old me to start drawing. Sakura is lucky to have Tomoyo making her all these awesome battle costumes!

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40 Day Anime Challenge Day 24- Best Anime Parents: Gunther and Effa from Ascendance of a Bookworm

*Caution: Ascendance of a Bookworm Spoilers*

These two are relatively new to the small but mighty group of excellent anime parents, but they’ve more than won their place. They live in a world that’s about as technologically advanced as pre-Renaissance Europe (except where the upper classes have magic) and are commoners with 2 (later 3) children, including perpetually ill Myne. Now, in that kind of life, with resources scarce, it makes sense to let her die and focus on keeping their other children healthy. But they take care of her. 

They don’t question or condemn her obsession with creating books, or any of the other advanced technology she “invents.” When they find out the reason for her illness is that she was a commoner born with a high degree of magic, they don’t try to sell her off to nobles, the way other magic afflicted commoners are sold. They care for her just as they always have, and respect Main’s decisions how she handles her magic. They support her as she enters the world of merchants and then of the church, advocating for her so they’ll accommodate her disability (chronic illness), which is unheard of in her society. In fact, they both almost get killed multiple times standing up for her, because commoners aren’t supposed to stand up to upper classes. 

And finally, and this one hits me on a very personal level, they allow her to be adopted by a noble who can keep her safe from the bad nobles targeting her, something they just can’t do in their position, no matter how hard they try. They love her and want her to be safe more than anything else, even if it means they need to let her go. Now, this hits home for me because, years ago, I placed my son for adoption at birth because I couldn’t care for him at the time. I picked the family and they are the sweetest people ever and the adoption is open so I still see them and he knows who I am, but at the time, I was heartbroken losing my baby boy. And this is before I even got to know him. I can’t imagine the pain Gunther and Effa felt when allowing the girl they’d raised and bonded with to be adopted. And to top it all off, this was a closed adoption. Her name was changed, and they were not allowed to let on that they knew her ever again. She was just another noble they had no business approaching. In fact, her adoptive father even said the only reason he didn’t kill her whole family was to prevent Myne from going berserk with her power. To place a child they’d raised, in a closed adoption, and threatened with death if they ever approach her. I don’t know if I could do that. But they did. And for that, they have my respect.