rachelgardnerfictionkin

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

⚠️Content Warning: Violence, Bullying, Suic/de Mention, Trauma etc. | 🆔 Title: Rejoined but Left a Discord Server.

I hate people.

People can be very scummy and sometimes I wonder what I do to deserve such responses. I don't want to call anyone out or disclose this server here (even though it's a public server and those people do not deserve respect) but it's one I've been on before. Decided to leave after friends and my headmates kept telling me to do so, NOT because people on that server told me to.

I was bored and decided to broaden my social life a bit with revisiting an unhinged "degenerate" server I used to be on many many years ago leading to a couple of the friends I have today. I thought it was a "good" idea because not many places I felt comfortable in because of my dark passions and beliefs and the general consensus of most people. But it wasn't worth it in the end.

I can handle a slander or two but in the end it made no sense to stay where every time I spoke I'm told to "kys", it's why I disable messages and replies to my posts on sites like Tumblr and Bluesky. I regret attempting to expand my social life and rejoin a Discord server that I believed I would fit into.

I hate people. I hate how this kind of mentality and behavior is normal and accepted. I hate being a human and living in this society.

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

🆔 Title: Speak up, boy! | Victor ft. Colton the Slime Cat | AllTalk TTS

📜 Description: A couple of my Slime Rancher OCs are talking. Victor is insisting that Colton speak. Hesitant, Colton shares the information Victor wants to know. I made a mistake with AllTalk TTS yesterday and spent the whole day trying to correct my errors. After sleeping on it, I reinstalled everything, this time for v2, which has a slightly different interface than v1.9c that I had been using.

🗣️ Voices: Victor the Slime Cat (AI Generated) & Colton the Slime Cat (AI Generated) 🔊 Sampled: Arumat P. Thanatos (Voiced by Kyle Hebert) from Star Ocean 4 (Victor the Slime Cat) & Finn Ames (Voiced by Brian Timothy Anderson) from Mashle: Magic and Muscles (Colton the Slime Cat) ⚙️ Made by: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

Victor the Slime Cat ©️ RachelTheFictionkin (Me) Colton the Slime Cat ©️ RachelTheFictionkin (Me) Slime Rancher ©️ Monomi Park

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

🆔 Title: I woke up next to Donkey Kong | Rachel the Angel | AllTalk TTS

📜 Description: Donkey Kong was in my bed this morning... I don't know why or how he got there. Maybe he just wanted to visit. I have no idea why I made this... I age restricted the video just to be safe. But at least I have a voice for myself now.

🗣️ Voice: Rachel the Angel (AI Generated) 🔊 Sampled: Rachel Gardner from Satsuriku no Tenshi (Angels of Death) ⚙️ Made by: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

Rachel the Angel (Me) ©️ RachelTheFictionkin (Me) Rachel Gardner ©️ Hoshikuzu KRNKRN (Makoto Sanada)

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

🆔 Title: I'm more than suitable | Victor the Slime Cat | AllTalk TTS

📜 Subtitle: One of my many Slime Rancher OCs

🗣️ Voice: Victor the Slime Cat (AI Generated) 🔊 Sampled: Arumat from Star Ocean 4 (He's literally him so it was only fitting) ⚙️ Made by: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

Victor the Slime Cat ©️ RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

*I used an old drawing of Victor since I haven't updated his appearance in a while.

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

i go on tumblr, talk to myself then leave

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

🆔 Title: What about your parents? | Clouse the Slime Cat | AllTalkTTS

📜 Subtitle: One of my many Slime Rancher OCs

🗣️ Voice: Clouse the Slime Cat (AI Generated) 🔊 Sampled: Ratchet from Ratchet & Clank ⚙️ Made by: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

Clouse the Slime Cat ©️ RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

🆔 Title: Hey, I'm Clouse the Slime Cat | AllTalkTTS

📜 Subtitle: One of my many Slime Rancher OCs

🗣️ Voice: Clouse the Slime Cat (AI Generated) 🔊 Sampled: Ratchet from Ratchet & Clank ⚙️ Made by: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

Clouse the Slime Cat ©️ RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

⚠️Content Warning: Pokephilia & Sound

🆔 Title: Blade has a Question for Rachel | Blade the Bisharp ft. Zack the Goblin | AllTalkTTS | By RachelTheFictionkin

📜 Subtitle: "the pokemins" 😲

🗣️ Voices: Blade the Bisharp & Zack the Goblin (AI Generated) 🔊 Sampled: Gladiolus Amicitia (Blade the Bisharp) & Isaac Foster (Zack the Goblin) ⚙️ Made by: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

🆔 Title: What if the Jigglypuff... | Blade the Bisharp | AllTalk TTS 🗣️ Voice: Blade the Bisharp (AI Generated) 🔊 Sampled: Gladiolus Amicitia ⚙️ Made by: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

Mother is saying a lot of things too fast, and I begin to feel frustrated and stutter.

Mom: "Don't start that WEIRD acting crap with me!"

I hate when she says that word... She always says this whenever I become flustered. Saying that I'm just "faking it" and for me to "grow up."

There are times when I want to cry, but I have to force myself not to, so my mom won't see and yell at me once again. I really hate having to suppress my emotions. I've been made to see myself as a failure for getting upset over things that I've been told are "not normal things to get upset over." It's either act normal and be happy or get scolded.

It does nothing but aid in the manifestation of my paranoia of being judged.

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

I wish some people understood that I generally dislike others. Their existence tends to annoy and upset me, making me feel overall uncomfortable. It's a reminder that I have to endure being a human in human society. A society where people often behave and think differently than I do, usually for the worse. I'm constantly reminded of how horribly others treated me growing up, from harassment to manipulation, gaslighting, and abuse.

My therapist believes that all I need to do is just be out and socializing with people to overcome my trauma and sensory overload, but all it does is re-enable it, especially when most people like to discuss topics that upset me or make me extremely uncomfortable, leaving me unable to defend myself without escalating the situation further.

When I have to interact with someone, it's a battlefield that I typically have to mentally prepare for in advance, just to scrape by without losing my mind. I wish people understood how much effort it takes to do that and did not assume that their approach to social interactions is on the same level as mine.

Just try to understand... Stop treating me like I have to be like everyone else whether or not they are struggling with mental wellness.

I like fictional creatures and characters from video games. They make me happy. They're that safe space for me. That comfort tool whenever I go out or get into a situation that makes me uneasy. I try to find ways to include them in my daily activities to help me along. But I do still struggle with trauma of being told to "grow up" and "you're a failure for liking "kiddy" and "weird" stuff".

I admit, I should approach my therapist with that, hence why I'm doing my best to create write ups like these so that I have a better time speaking to her about what I desire and what I believe will actually help me.

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

🗒️ Title: Arceus would like Rachel to... | AllTalk TTS | Gladiolus Amicitia's Voice 🗣️ Voice: Blade the Bisharp (AI Generated) 🔊 Sampled: Gladiolus Amicitia ⚙️ Made by: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

I was bored today.

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

🗒️ Title: They keep giving me prompts... 😩 📸 Screenshots: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

🗒️ Title: 😏 Zack the Goblin wants to teach Rachel how to Play | AllTalk TTS | Isaac Foster Voice 🔊 Voice: Zack the Goblin (AI Generated) ⚙️ Made by: RachelTheFictionkin (Me) 🌐 Source: YouTube

Here's something I finally decided to dabble in after years of consideration. I spent a couple of hours learning the basics of creating my first AI voice using AllTalk TTS. I snagged some voice clips of Zack from an episode of Angels of Death and inserted them into the tool, grabbed some random things he said on Discord, and re-generated a few times to get something I appreciate. It was quite easy (unlike trying to learn AI art…). Now, it's by no means perfect and will likely need some tweaking, but I think this is good for my first attempt. I hope to create voices for all my soulbonds and do more fun things with this.

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

😴 Title: Zack, Where are You? (March 12th, 2025) 🖋️ Author: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

🗒️ Title: "This man is asking if you'd fuck the creature" 📸 Screenshots: RachelTheFictionkin (Me)

[rachelgardnerfictionkin]

Hey, I updated my little pinned intro post for anyone who hasn't looked: About Me — ⚜️RachelTheFictionkin ζ⚜️