noodlemaxie-blog

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Making friends is easy, it’s killing them once you’ve finished with them that’s the hard part.

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Germany invading Russia (1942)

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Thor

Why did Thor get hurt when he sat down?

He lost his ass-guard.

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Germany suffers from hyperinflation (1918, colorized)

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Wonderful Digital Surrealism from Justin Peters

I’m a 22 years old German digital surrealist artist who merges reality with my own imagination using photoshop. “Everything you can imagine is real” by Pablo Picasso, is a quote I live by, especially when creating my work: Painting my own dreamworld where everything is possible, through unexpected and unique imagery combinations, and photo manipulations. I hope that when people experience my work, they discover a new and different world, which they can dive into, to prove that everything is possible when you open your mind.

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Behance

Thank you Justin for your submission! Submit here & don’t forget links to your website/other work and contact details.

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Lee Harvey Oswald takes aim at John F. Kennedy. (Dallas, Texas. November 22, 1963)

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The Invention of the Jelly Baby

Head of Design at confectionary company: So we've got this new jelly product we just need to figure out what kind of shape will be most attractive to consumers.

Worker 1: Hmmmmm.

Worker 2: Hm.

Worker 3: No idea man.

Worker 4: Babies. I wanna be able to eat infant shaped gummies.

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I love how the article thumbnails are him in his action movies. Like, he's a hero irl just like in his movies.

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Same with voting

If you can be too young to drive, you should be able to be too old to drive as well.

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SO many great points made in this thread. If I could emphasize anything Ms. Duke said, it would be to pay attention to people who try to minimize any crime or transgression by shoving it into this far away safe place called “the past.” This should be a flashing red warning light when this “defense” is used - especially in politics. The person using this tactic is conceding the fact that what they did was wrong, without directly saying so.

“The past” is a strategic safe place often used by people who have done wrong, where “past” wrongs no longer matter anymore, and therefore no one should ever be admonished or punished. Because hey, it’s in the past, remember? Whenever you hear someone say “it’s in the past” about a controversial issue, please understand that what they’re really saying is, “HURRY UP AND GET OVER IT.”

People frequently use this tactic of stuffing harmful words and problematic deeds into “the past” when talking about things like slavery, or mass incarceration, or the structural inequality that was planned & enforced by the government, and obviously for sexual assault. But ignoring “the past” just doesn’t make sense. It’s like saying what happened yesterday had no impact on today. Imagine telling someone that what happened to them in their childhood doesn’t matter today; that your childhood had no impact on who you are today….because your childhood was in “the past” and isn’t relevant today.

Black people today are still feeling the financial and psychological impacts of centuries of slavery & Jim Crow Laws. Arrest records follow people arrested for marijuana possession 20 years ago; the Black and Latinx people disproportionately arrested under the 1996 Crime Bill are still having trouble finding good work today, and they still cannot apply for housing and financial aid even today in 2018—if they aren’t still in rotting away in prison for their non-violent drug “crimes” of possession, that is.

Similarly, a woman who was sexually abused may suffer the impacts of that abuse for a lifetime. It does not matter if it was two days ago or 20 years ago. Rape is a mental and physical trauma that leaves lifetime scars. I almost can’t believe this still needs to be said, but apparently….

Finally, the other point that needs emphasis is how deftly the “both sides are at fault” argument is being used here by Pastor Savage. Shared blame. I’ve seen racists use this tactic before. It usually sounds like, “Well everyone is a little racist - both sides do it and white people are victims of racism too.”—of course that’s complete BS, but I’ve rarely seen this trope used so blatantly as an excuse for rape: the pastor is arguing that he, the rapist, and his underaged victim (a high school student) placed in his care, somehow they both share equally in the blame. That’s what’s being argued, but without using those exact words.

This is disgusting. How dare Pastor Savage use this—confessing to the crime of rape—to give himself a pat on the back. Andy Savage is a disgusting rapist and he needs to face a prison sentence. The congregation that gave him a standing ovation is disgusting. Terrible excuses for human beings all the way around.

The only hero here is Jules Woodson.

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E.T Time

If there's other 'intelligent' life in the universe, the chances that they perceive time and are the same size is quite slim. For example our planet moves at a certain speed and we see time in a certain way. If we met another civilisation out there, they could easily move way faster than us and do everything way quicker, or much slower.

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Did I st-t-st-s-s-t-st-STUTTER?

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Pissing

Guys, do you ever forget to lock the toilet door but just piss in the water as loud as you can to make sure people know you're in there?

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Rather than traveling to Oz, the Scarecrow, Tin-Man, and Lion should go for a run at congress as they lack a brain, heart, and courage.

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Poe: Now that Leia’s in a coma, I’m going to start a mutiny

Person: Why?

Poe: She’s like 85% of my impulse control