nashintero

[nashintero]

I thought I had a lot to say turns out I just can’t remember any of it.

[nashintero]

monteverde

Catching a glimpse in the wilderness

Of your perfect arms

Warm and inviting

Waiting to take away every bad thought that I’ve had today

m.elmwood

[nashintero]

lottando per andarmene.

send me off to the trenches

to where i can fight

for something worthwhile

i’ll always search for a fight

because i will always need to defend myself

m. elmwood

[nashintero]

here’s hoping

removing you from that toxic gaze

trying to separate

all the mistakes i’ve made

wondering how much of them

i can actually debate

because i can talk myself out of anything

and make it feel effortless

m.elmwood

[nashintero]

I fear putting myself out there because I can’t fathom what people will think about me since I don’t even think of myself.

[nashintero]

Post-deniability

I would rather rot in solitude

than thrive in unison

with you

because that’s what keeps you going

is a conscious stream

of inflated truths

m.elmwood

[nashintero]

i tell myself that it is okay and that i forgive you that it doesn’t bother me anything really anything but the words are thin and hollow and collapse under their own weight because it was you i couldn’t even bear to look at the wound ten years later  in a checkout lane line i would notice that i was bleeding and remark that i couldn’t remember cutting myself i love like a beat dog i eat your sin

[nashintero]

North Star

it’s the compass that leads to

the Escapism

we seek

relaying that information

til we peak

into our sense of self-worth

regardless of the climate

because she will always be there

in the sky

prying into every dark thought

and illuminating light into it

m.elmwood

[nashintero]

their true self

explosive rain of regret

words unsaid

pain exploited

in the name of revenge

what are you supposed

to think when the sidewalk

shows you it’s cracks

and lets you trip over them

time and time again

 m.elmwood

[nashintero]

distortions

opens doorways closes faces opens places tortures my faces because I can’t decide which face to use while I’m wasting rotting my brain away at a desk til ends day.

-m.elmwood

[nashintero]

who’s gonna tell her?

hands like blades

ripping every single paper

with my rapidly anxious thoughts

writing them down so fast because in

every moment

my feelings waiver

-m.elmwood

[nashintero]

a Yellow royal

we reaped the consequences of the environment you created

the place you made that provided you with everything you possibly needed

instead desolation was chosen

and verbal abuse and dissatisfaction was the theme

of the story that was childhood

- from the family you should’ve never had

m.elmwood

[nashintero]

giving credence

putting your insults through the grinder dissecting each word like it’s code wondering how to decipher what you meant instead of what you actually said it’s excruciatingly normal for me it’s time for me to take what you say and actually believe you instead of making excuses for your disdain

-m.elmwood

[nashintero]

i live in the void but if you dont && youre breaded up consider donating to one of the best free learning resources in the world rn

[nashintero]

conjunctive chaos

sparks ignite

as I fuel your fire

of deflection,

your issues onto me

setting ablaze your disdain

for yourself

instead, the blame is condemned to me

while I hold the match

that is holding our relationship together

and you spark it because it’s the only thing you know how to do properly

— destruction

-m.elmwood

[nashintero]

Camellia

i long for peace

with myself

with others

and with this damn world

i long for security

within myself

with my relationships

and in my own damn home

i long for art so fucking jarring my breath is taken by the mere thought of it

i long for passion

because everyone these days wants interim stays

and i just want permanence

-m.elmwood

[nashintero]

in Lapland

words represent sheets

on the bed of lies

you facilitate,

a place I lay in every night

because the lies are stifling

and the truth is glacial.

-m.elmwood