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[madie-evelyn-blog]

Repeat after me: Fascism BAD.

We shouldn’t have to repeat this so many times, but for the time being:

- Fascism is a right wing ideology

- White Nationalism and the groups within it (Proud Boys, Patriot Guard etc) are fascist in nature

- Far right groups who have outspoken leaders and use violence & intimidation for political means are, by definition, domestic terrorist organizations

- ‘Antifa’ is not an organization because it isn’t a centralized group of people and it doesn’t have a designated leader

- ‘Antifa’ is short for anti fascist and is a movement designed to push back against the rise of violent far right, ie fascist, groups in America

- Trump wants to label Antifa, or anyone who opposes his government, terrorists (which reeks of Authoritarianism), but refuses to do the same for White Nationalist groups

- White Nationalists have murdered their political rivals; Antifa hasn’t murdered a single person

- If you say you’re against Antifa, you are, whether you realize it or not, supporting Fascism.

- To be Anti-Antifa is to be pro-fascism, and to be pro-fascism is to support the rise of White Nationalism, Authoritarianism, and other dangerous right wing ideologies

Learn your history so those in power are no longer able to lie to you.

[madie-evelyn-blog]

We are beings composed of a myriad of faces & identities, reflecting and shifting with every passing day...

[madie-evelyn-blog]

Wow. Even as a staunch supporter of the modern climate movement, it’s still heart wrenching hearing the profound dread from the younger generation and it really puts into perspective how corporations, mainstream media, and corrupt governments have very nearly sealed our fate.

All for the love of money. It’s disgusting on a level beyond words and I hope that Greta’s brutal honesty will ‘light a fire’ under the billions around the world and open everyone’s eyes to the dire situation we’re all in.

I don’t like talking about revolution. But we’re at a tipping point now where it may be necessary for our survival.

Give it to them, Greta. 

[madie-evelyn-blog]

s/o to all the lgbtq+ individuals that feel like they have to choose between their family or their partner, their identity or their faith, their expression or their culture. i see you and love you and want absolutely nothing but good things for you.

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[madie-evelyn-blog]

Greg Abbott and the Conservatives in Texas are a clear and present danger to public safety.

I don’t even know where to begin with this. It’s astonishing that they crammed so many blatant lies and so much misinformation into one article.

First off, I honestly feel bad for people who actually believe this. They’ve completely fallen for Evangelical & Conservative propaganda and don’t realize it.

‘Thoughts & prayers’ do NOTHING. God, if such a thing even exists, seems oddly passive while more and more innocent people are senselessly murdered. You’re being told it’s a ‘God problem’ because those in power want to keep you passive and distract you from their corruption, which has cost countless lives.

To quote astrophysicist Katie Mack, “In America, the only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is to wait until he is actively shooting people, because any attempt to make mass murder more difficult to initiate would upset the NRA too much.

Creating a society supersaturated with weapons of casual mass murder is a very reliable way to make sure the “bad guy with a gun” will get shot, as long as you don’t mind that a whole lot of other people will die senselessly in the process”.

The NRA has spent millions on pro gun propaganda and deliberately lied to its’ loyal followers in order to increase their bottom line. They do not care another human cost. If they had any shred of humanity, they would’ve attacked the issue of gun violence head on years ago. With their resources and level of political power, imagine what they could’ve accomplished.

But no. Profit over human lives is the name of the game for too many on the right (Ted Cruz, the Bush family, Mitch McConnell, Greg Abbott, the list goes on).

Also, what is this about the media’s ‘narrative about racism as the cause of the mass shooting epidemic’? Excuse me?

White Nationalism and domestic terrorist organizations like the Proud Boys, Patriot Guard etc have been on the rise in recent years and have been supercharged by Trump’s horrifically racist, xenophobic, and violent rhetoric.

Remember when White Supremacists in Charlottesville were chanting things like “Jews will not replace us” and “blood and soil”? Those are NAZI CHANTS. These people idolize Nazi Germany and want to give birth to a Fascist, Authoritarian America.

They have murdered innocent civilians. The vast majority of those who committed mass shootings have been white men with AR-15s, and many of them have cited Trump and Nationalist, Fascist ideologies as their main inspiration (the Christchurch shooter cited Trump, Ben Shapiro and more as personal inspirations).

They repeatedly talk about an idea called ‘the great replacement’, ie mass immigration will cause white people to be bred out of existence and wipe out their ‘culture’, therefore it is an existential threat that must be stopped.

This idea is RACIST to its’ very core and is what has radicalized countless Conservatives to take matters into their own hands and kill those who look different than they do. This has been documented over and over and over, and yet Conservatives keep yelling that it’s all just a ‘narrative’, and that racism has nothing to do with it.

It’s all deflection, and it’s all they know how to do. The GOP has a long history of enacting policies that are deeply racist in nature (gerrymandering and dividing voting districts in a way that a) gives Conservatives an advantage in elections and b) makes it difficult for minorities to vote, for example), and their rhetoric over the past few years has more and more closely aligned with that of White Nationalists.

(I’m honestly surprised they haven’t outright called for a white ethnostate just yet, but that’s probably in our future)

They know that their voting block tends to be religious, pro gun, and either anti immigrant or prejudiced towards them and racial minorities, and they are playing every one of their followers like a fiddle.

They don’t want proper gun control policies because that would hurt their bottom line and push away their supporters who are openly racist, xenophobic etc. They will lie and deflect, use scare tactics, paint anyone who speaks out against them as the enemy, and use religion and language like ‘thoughts and prayers’ to keep you in a passive state in order to maintain their death grip on politics.

Every politician who vocally opposes gun control and refuses to acknowledge the true causes of this gun violence epidemic are complicit and fully responsible for every shooting that follows the most recent one. Every single one.

And they don’t appear to be too beat up or worried about that. Makes them seem kind of heartless, no?

Lastly, they’re making the claim that gun violence is caused by people who ‘don’t know God’, right? So we would expect to see higher rates of gun violence in more secular countries.. right?

Unfortunately, once again, the facts tell a very different story and show that we are one of the *only* countries in the world experiencing an epidemic like this and the ONLY country where guns vastly outnumber the # of citizens.

Also Texas is one of the most deeply red and religious states in America so you would expect it to have a lower rate of gun violence.. right?

Welp. I guess God really does ‘work in mysterious ways’.

I know I’m beginning to sound like a broken record but it’s only because this is so, so important: research these things for yourself and don’t ever believe what someone tells you simply b/c they’re an authority figure or claim they’re an ‘expert’.

[madie-evelyn-blog]

Why I Left Christianity

Growing up in East Texas meant that for 25 years of my life, I genuinely thought that Christianity was the one true religion and that Jesus was a real, living, breathing force b/c practically every single person around me believed the same thing.

It didn’t matter that these beliefs often conflicted with my understanding of science and humanity. I would use the excuse of ‘well God knows best so it’s not for us to understand’.

But things began to change when I started meeting friends who were atheists, LGBTQ+, Wiccan, pagan, Buddhists, agnostic.. I took a step outside of my bubble out of curiosity and unknowingly kicked off my journey out of the church.

And then I realized I was transgender.

I didn’t have all of the following thoughts in one “a-HA!” moment but little by little, as I pried into the religion I was raised on, I began to see contradictions, blatant bigotry, historical inaccuracies, elements carried over from older religions etc etc. Once the snowball began picking up speed, it turned into an avalanche and I knew that I could never go back.

Here are those thoughts:

This is what an abuser sounds like: If you give others more attention/affection than you give me & if I’m not the center of your life 24/7, I will NEVER accept you or grant you ‘salvation’.

But remember, I love you!!

Also, don’t forget, what YOU want for your life and what YOU feel you need for yourself are not as important as what I want. Serve the church. Serve ME. But don’t question me.

I’m right. You don’t need to understand why, just accept it.

If you leave the faith, you were never a ‘true’ Christian. True Christians follow my Word and believe what they’re told b/c only MY words are true. Everyone else is trying to deceive you.

(even though there’s no evidence that the Bible is the actual or inspired word of a deity, instead of words that were a) written by men who believed the Sun orbited the Earth & had no understanding of science, biology, psychology etc and b) reflect the culture and norms of the time. If modern society & culture seem to conflict with the Bible, maybe the problem is the Bible, not modern society.)

They want to separate me from you. DON’T TRUST THEM. Get away from them if you need to.

If something in my Word makes you uncomfortable, just say ‘only God understands’ and think on it no more. If I command something, it’s just, not ‘immoral’ or ‘evil’. Your human minds can’t understand my will or reasoning so DON’T.

My Word surpasses all understanding. No human discovery or scientific, geological or historical evidence will ever be enough to prove me wrong. It doesn’t matter if it was written by men. I inspired it. Don’t ask for evidence, just believe.

Sure, the flood story was copied directly from the epic of Gilgamesh & almost every major tenet of Christianity was borrowed from Judaism, ancient Canaanite & Babylonian religions, Zoroastrianism, a religion that predates even Islam, etc., BUT.. I am the only God that’s true. My Word is the only one that’s correct. Don’t question it.

Yes, I commanded my followers to murder men & children, kidnap & rape women, burn down the homes and villages of my ‘enemies’ in the past but I made a ‘new covenant’, remember?

It was necessary so MY people could thrive. MY will was correct. Don’t question it.

Sure, I didn’t give Adam or Eve the ability to understand ‘good & evil’ but Eve STILL ate the apple, so humanity should be punished for the rest of time b/c of her choice! It’s not MY fault that she didn’t know any better. She was tempted with knowledge of the world as it is and I couldn’t have that.

What happens to Buddhists, Muslims, Native Americans, Hindus, Wiccans, Pagans, Atheists, indigenous tribes & people who never had a chance to hear my word? That’s for me to decide. Don’t think about it. Stop.

Why would I send gay, lesbian, trans etc people to hell if I, as you say, ‘created them that way’? You say it’s ‘sociopathic’ that I would ‘create someone a certain way but only accept them if they turn against their true nature’ but show how little you understand me & MY will.

How can you know for sure that I am the only true God and that all of the others are false & nonexistent? How can you know I’m real, even though you’ve never spoken directly to me (or vice versa), you’ve never seen me & I’ve never actually been proven in any capacity to exist?

How do you know I’m not just a manifestation of humanity’s desire to make sense of its’ own mortality or a way for those in power to control others?

Human understanding won’t give you the truth. Just believe. Don’t question it.

People will tell you that the feelings and emotions you experience are just your mind ‘doing what it’s supposed to do’ and that your instincts are there b/c of evolution, natural chemical reactions & learned responses b/c of how you were raised..

Don’t believe them. Your emotions are me speaking to you. Everything that happens in your life is because of me. All of those little coincidences are because of me. I am responsible for your successes and failures. Without me, you’ll forever be empty.

How come Atheists and others from every walk of life seem to be completely content, happy with themselves and their lives, and full of passion and vitality? Because they’re not ‘truly happy’. They’ve never experienced MY love. Only I can give true meaning to your life.

Love me. Obey me. Don’t question me. If you turn your back on me, you’ll burn for eternity. But remember, I am a loving & pure God! I’ll always be there for you. Until you turn your back on me.

I’m not holding you hostage. Only I have the answers you seek. Live how I tell you to live. It doesn’t matter if it feels like ‘torture’ to you. It doesn’t matter if you think my standards are putting you through immense mental & emotional pain.

Only my way is right. By following me, you will glorify me. Your life is not about you. It’s about me. I created you to worship me. I’m not vain. I’m not unjust.

Don’t listen to science. Don’t listen to reason. Don’t be so open minded that your brain falls out. Don’t think too much. Don’t ask certain questions. Just accept. Remember, I love you and want the best for you.

[madie-evelyn-blog]

2018: The year that changed, & saved, my life

2018... where do I even begin in talking about how life changing this year has been.

When you hear stories or see films in which the main character starts off in one place and reaches a point where they’ve become a completely different, stronger and more well realized person, it feels Hollywood-ized, like something you’d only see in fiction.

This year, that ‘story’ was a reality for me.

Even though I don’t believe in a literal hell, just twelve months ago, I felt as if I were experiencing the closest thing to it. When for the past 15+ years, over half of your life, you’ve forced yourself to repress certain traits & desires due to fear over how family, friends & society would react, you begin to feel trapped in a prison of your own making.

I didn’t have an identity or personality that felt genuine. The way I tried to present myself was nothing more than a patchwork of male figures who seemed confident, full of life and sure of themselves. But the more I tried to force myself to become who I thought I needed to be, the more it felt like a facade. It didn’t make sense to me. It never did.

When I joked about actresses I had a ‘crush’ on, it dawned on me that rather than feeling an actual attraction towards them, I was projecting my innermost wants for myself onto them. Something deep within me screamed louder & louder that the entirety of who these women were was who I was supposed to be. Everything about it clashed with the ideals I was raised around but I couldn’t turn it off.

We can’t change who we are. Once I began talking to & reading stories from others who had transitioned, the wall I had tried for so many years to keep between myself & what was inside began to break. When I studied the science behind gender identity and looked at all of things I’d struggled with from childhood to then, I saw the connection between everything I’d experienced.

It made sense. And in that moment, all of things I’d tried so hard to repress finally burst through. There was no turning back, ever.

My choices were clear: transition and continue living, or...

I chose life.

And I was scared beyond belief but sometimes you have to face your deepest, darkest demons in order to overcome them and find the mental peace & clarity you’ve always thought was out of reach.

Comparing then to now, it’s still a little surreal to be able to say I’m happy, at peace with who I am and with where life is and have an almost uncontainable joy & excitement for the future. The noise that used to drown out every one of my thoughts is gone in its’ place is contentment and assuredness that even better things are coming.

This journey is far from over & I’m still a long way from where I want to be but I’m grateful to be alive, to have such an incredible family, blood & beyond, around me and to finally have a cause I’m willing to fight to the last for. Once you find belonging & purpose, all other inconsequential things in life just seem to fall away.

Thank you, everyone, for supporting me, pushing me and helping to keep me afloat through everything. You’re the reason I’m still here. I could never repay that but still. I’m grateful❤️

Here’s to 2019, yeah? May it be the best one yet. If all works out like I’m hoping, it definitely will be...

[madie-evelyn-blog]

Remembering Leelah Alcorn

“Refuse to be your child’s first bully”.

I remember hearing about Leelah Alcorn’s death four years ago to the day but didn’t realize how devastating the circumstances around it were until recently. After coming out as trans to her religious family, she suffered, by their hands, untold amounts of emotional abuse, neglect & ostracization, to the point where she felt dehumanized and was driven to suicide.

Part of her suicide note said “After 10 years of confusion I finally understood who I was. I immediately told my mom, and she reacted extremely negatively, telling me that it was a phase, that I would never truly be a girl, that God doesn’t make mistakes, that I am wrong. If you are reading this, parents, please don’t tell this to your kids. Even if you are Christian or are against transgender people don’t ever say that to someone, especially your kid. That won’t do anything but make them hate them self. That’s exactly what it did to me”.

Why are we always so quick to attack what we don’t understand? Even if you can’t relate to someone’s personal struggles, that doesn’t mean said struggles are nonexistent. It breaks my heart that so many teenagers (who are still children, mind you) are either mistreated or outright disowned by their family for merely coming to an understanding of who they are and wanting to express that.

When you’re already going through a stressful, emotionally volatile period in life and are bombarded with messages like “you’re broken & need to change” or “you’ll be sent straight to hell for this”, your self image, mental health & will to live can be damaged to the point of no return.

Even though religion itself isn’t something I have an issue with, it sickens me that so many families feel justified in wielding the Bible or Quran as a weapon to bludgeon their child into their own idea of ‘conformity’, regardless of how severe the consequences will be for the child’s well being.

Who you are is who you are. Your personal identity, orientation & sense of self are an inherent part of what makes you ‘you’. It’s ignorant & arrogant to think bullying a child into an arbitrary binary would in any way be healthy for them & pleasing to any sort of ‘all loving’ God. We don’t even have proof that a God exists but these texts are still treated by too many as unfalsifiable fact, while the actual science behind being bi, gay, trans, etc is called fake.

Leelah’s suicide note ended with “The only way I will rest in peace is if one day transgender people aren’t treated the way I was, they’re treated like humans, with valid feelings and human rights. Gender needs to be taught about in schools, the earlier the better. My death needs to mean something. My death needs to be counted in the number of transgender people who commit suicide this year. I want someone to look at that number and say “that’s f***ed up” and fix it. Fix society. Please”.

Love each other. Listen to one another. Even if you don’t understand someone’s perspective, lend them your shoulder when they’re suffering & don’t make judgments or assumptions. Humans need one another to survive in this world. Seeing children like Leelah suffer so needlessly makes me want to do everything in my power to somehow help them and so many others feel supported & safe.

That’s a cause I’d hope everyone could support, regardless or personal beliefs. A nationwide ban on conversion therapy, which is nothing less than mental torture, should’ve been enacted decades ago but it’s encouraging seeing how much progress we’ve made in recent years.

We have the ability to make the world a better, more loving & more open minded place for ourselves and those in vulnerable minorities. The eternal optimist in me will never give up hope that our country will reflect that, someday❤️

[madie-evelyn-blog]

Things to NEVER say to your Transgender/Agender/Bigender/Gendfluid/DemiBoy/Girl/Etc. Child:

They are broken/sick/wrong.

Their pronouns & name don’t matter/shouldn’t be an issue bc it “doesnt matter how people refer to you”.

“You have a penis/vagina so I’m going to call you a Boy/Girl”

Tell them they will never get HRT or Surgery.

Tell them they’re pretty, beautiful, etc(dfab) or Handsome, Ladies man(dmab) when it makes them uncomfortable.

Tell them you’re taking them to conversion/reparative therapy.

Add more if you have them!

Side Note: Guys, Leelah Alcorn’s death is December 28th. It marks a year without her in it. Leelah’s Law to ban conversion therapy to minors didn’t pass.