lewismonochromepepper

[lewismonochromepepper]

Dear diary,

There was certainly an adjustment. When it came to the weavers, Only a few of them seemed to relax enough to be around me, including Greg. Jamila was still angry, which… i wasn’t particularly happy about it, but I couldn’t blame her. The siblings - Oscar and Lila - were less than pleased too. With Lila keeping a distance. I think she was trying to protect her baby because she kept cradling her stomach. I don’t know when she got pregnant, but if she had a husband he wasn’t there. Oscar seemed more distanced mentally. He didn’t talk much, besides asking a few questions. His wife was a lot more curious about it all, mentioning that she thought she saw him a few times while she went to work. We used to be coworkers, the three of us. 

I couldn’t help but blush whenever she commented on one of my features, and how it was so much different than the picture that was stationed in the kitchen. A small memorial was put up In the corner, and she explained that the cooks and staff members missed him dearly. So while there was already a small memorial in the family home in the livingroom, there’s a few more Tucked in various parts of the restaurant. 

I’ll admit, I felt selfish. The fact that it took so long for me to come back, only to find out how much people missed me… I didn’t have the heart to tell her that I was out having adventures myself, but I should have. It’s been weighing on me.

The kids were a mixed bag. they were stationed around the living room, watching him like a hawk, but only a few of them were actually willing to talk to him. The rest of them were mainly quiet, and when they did speak it was about how he changed and such. It was obvious that they were trying to be polite, which hurt a little bit, but I’m trying not to let it get the best of me. I have been gone for about two years, and now to suddenly show up being so different…

Anyway. Other things have been happening as of late. Nothing too drastic, but my clothes have been losing color steadily. And it’s become even more apparent in my world than an Arthurs. As well as the decor in my room. When I first arrived it was bright and the pinks were pigmented and the stuffed animal seemed lively. Maybe it’s just my own skewed perception, but it feels lonesome and tired now. When I step into the room I don’t feel comfort in the brightness of my childhood room, instead I feel… I don’t know.

But I do you know, is that Arthur has been on my mind a lot. I can’t help but miss him, since he was my roommate for so long… And my feelings for him… I don’t know how to feel about it right now. All I know is that I miss him and I want to message him, but it feels too soon. He was injured when I left, it might be a startling change for me to suddenly be gone. I… I feel like I abandoned him.

there’s a few more sentences of words that are in the end scribbled out.

Mono forgot how twitchy his own Arthur was. The man was sitting beside him in the backyard of the restaurant. Which was just a little fenced off area with some patches of grass to the fence to block it from the parking lot. Rose bushes and flowers masked the fence so that way there was a semblance of privacy.

The air felt tense, although mono couldn’t tell if it was because of his own anxiety or if there really was tension between them. But there was for sure an awkwardness. The two would keep glancing over at one another and then promptly looking away. Arthur looked like he had something to sat, opening his mouth and then closing it. Opting to clear his throat

Mono hums lightly. His fingers sliding along the metal tail of the cat pendant that lays over his button up shirt. The special charms ensure that nothing would find him… But Arthur still had a reaction to him.

Mono chews his lip, studying the underside of a bush as he rakes his mind for things to do. Things to talk about. There was the obvious small talk, about Arthur’s van, and his job. Then there was the awkward, of what was happening while he was gone… That was sure to bring up some bad memories considering how the weavers responded to his appearance. He could bring up the others that he had met… Salena and Arthur, Frenzy and Lament, all the Vivi’s and all the Lewis’. Talk about the beach and the cave and… Reverb.

No…. That… monos frown tightened as he tried to imagine how Arthur would respond if he brought any of them up. Maybe he would be upset that mono was being well acquainted with multiple people while they were still here in mourning. Mono would have to bring up like he didn’t return any sooner, and how he was scared and how he was selfish, and how-

“Nice charm you got there.“

Mono bobs to attention and turns to him, his brain scrambles to catch up and understand what Arthur was talking about. Arthur’s face, a little stony, softened the smallest bit. His eyes dipped down to monos chest and then back, and it finally occurred to him. Mono pinched the metal in between his fingers and he held it out a little bit, so that way both of them could get a better look at it.

“Thank you.” He says quietly, a little too quiet. “A friend made it for me. “

“It looks cute. Suits you.”

“Ah-! That’s sweet of you.” Mono smiles softly, thankful for the break in silence as the gears in his head turn as fast as they could. Latching onto this new conversation starter, mono leans his head back and hooks his fingers under the chains of other charms and amulets that were stashed away under his shirt. Unlike his clothes, they still glittered finally with the colors it adorned. The cat charm, a second warding charm, the amulet he was given by a mysterious animal, and a stabilizing charm. Mono holds the centerpieces over his hand so that Arthur can get a good look. Mono smiles with pride as Arthur twists around to peer close. There’s a small question on if Arthur could inch closer, that mono accepted without thought. Now Arthurs leg was now brushing against his own thigh. Butterflies picking up in his chest.

“Mind if I touch them?” Arthur asks, his eyes dropping to something else, “oh, cool ring.”

It’s a shock that he was so surprised by the things that Arthur noticed. Why?? He couldn’t tell. The metallic rainbow metal ring that made his heart skip a beat. His face darkened a little.

Something that Arthur noticed almost immediately. He lets out a soft chuckle that was a mixture between clearing his throat and projecting his voice. “What? You got engaged already without us?” His voice was anything but malicious. But mono’s face dropped and he quickly shook his head.

“No!" Mono haphazardly covers his hand and the other charms. Fidgeting a little with them as he tries to think of a way to explain that could banish the thought from Arthur’s head. But all the damage was already done, and his quick movement has Arthur scooting away a little bit and sitting up straighter.

“Hey, it’s alright? “

“… I’m sorry. But they were just - gifts. Um. Look, see?” Mono holds out his hand and flicks the ring, causing it to spin. Arthur watched with the smallest flicker of fascination, but his movements were stiff. 

Mono cursed himself. He didn’t want Arthur to put his walls up, and yet here he was hurting him regardless. Maybe this was too soon of a meeting. Maybe he should’ve rehearsed it a few more times in his room. Maybe-

“So, who made it? “

Mono swallows, flicking the ring twice until the hollow sound was louder than his rampaging thoughts. He needed to calm down. Now. 

Deep breath. Deep breath. 

“.. Lewis.. breath buddy.” without meaning to, mono stiffens under the hand pressed to his shoulder. It’s secure and firm, and mono focuses on the pressure for a minute. Counting to ten and counting his breaths.

The panic subsided, and Mono's head sinks forward as he calms. “Sorry.” He’s quiet again. It’s almost familiar, acting so rash and being so - messy with his feelings.

“It’s fine. No- no, it’s okay.” Arthur says firmly, eyebrows furrowed together with worry, making a face all too similar to Lance. “It’s - it’s a big change, right? Passing and then - well, moving back. It can be like that sometimes, so - take your time.”

That’s right. Arthur would know better than anyone how uprooting yourself would cause problems, considering how many times his family moved and how he was constantly sent to lance and then taken back, he would know. Mono also knew, even though he only moved once- twice now - but it was the biggest shift he had ever experienced at the time.

Mono frowns still, wanting nothing more than to fall onto his crux of chrome. It used to be so easy, back when he was alive and even a few months ago. 

“Thank you. I’m still sorry. I was hoping I wouldn’t be like this. But I-“ mono chokes out a soft laugh, “I guess I’m still getting used to everything.”

“It’s - it’s okay, Lew. Really. You… well you died, so your temperament changed.” It did. A lot changed. 

“.. I’m glad you’re here right now, Arthur. I missed you.”

“I missed you too, Lew.”

[lewismonochromepepper]

“   anything  you  wear  looks  good  on  you  especially .   ”

Face lighting up on surprise, mono blinks several times at her before his face became completely red. He Averts his gaze but the smile there was bright and unwavering.

“Oh stop it you! You’re just trying to flatter me so I’ll get you some ice cream, Hm?” He teases, not that she asked for anything in particular, but considering that there was an ice cream shop up ahead on their trail, mono was planning on doing so. But she didn’t have to know that. He gestures down to himself, “these old things? They’re practically pajamas!” There’s a twinkle of mischief in his eye.

“Although, I think the same for you if I’m honest. I keep having to look away because I want to point out every detail I like about you.”

[lewismonochromepepper]

“   who  needs  a  heart  when  a  heart  can  be  broken ??   ”

Mono watches Alice carefully after she said that, thinking over his words carefully but ultimately drawing a blank. There was a chance she wouldn’t listen, and he didn’t want to spend too much energy trying to cure her mindset.

Shrugging, “it allows you to be empathetic and compassionate. Even if it’s jaded, it can heal and become whole again. It’s nicer to love than wallow in loneliness,”

[lewismonochromepepper]

/hello there! It’s been a few months of hiatus, but I think I’m getting well enough to get back into the writing scene!

I know I said I wanted to write Drabbles, and unfortunately because of my wrist injuries, I haven’t been able to. They’re still kinda bad, so I have to be careful, but my hope is to write a ficlet per week of what happened with mono over the course of the hiatus.

[lewismonochromepepper]

❥     𝟖𝟎𝐬 𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐒    [   𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝚁𝚃𝙴𝚁𝚂    ]   .

sentence starters inspired by various lyrics from random hits from the 1980s !!   some lyrics have been slightly modified to be more usable .  change gendered language   &   add context to your needs .  happy roleplaying !!  ♡

“   something’s  buggin’  me .   ” “   something  ain’t  right .   ” “   my  best  friend  told  me  what  you  did  last  night .   ” “   i  should  have  been  with  you  instead .   ” “   wake  me  up  before  you  go .   ” “   i’m  not  planning  on  going  solo .   ” “   take  me  dancing  tonight .   ” “   you’re  my  lady ,   i’m  your  fool .   ” “   it  makes  me  crazy  when  you  act  so  cruel .   ” “   come on ,  baby .   let’s  not  fight .   ” “   we’ll  go  dancing   &   everything  will  be  alright .   ” “   we’ll  go  dancing  tomorrow  night .   ” “   it’s  cold  out  there ,   but  it’s  warm  in  bed .   ” “   don’t  look  at  it  like  it’s  forever .   ” “   i  guess  that’s  why  they  call  it  the  blues .   ” “   time  on  my  hands  could  be  time  spent  with  you .   ” “   picture  my  face  in  your  hands .   ” “   live  for  each  second  without  hesitation .   ” “   never  forget  i’m  your  man .   ” “   cry  in  the  night  if  it  helps .   ” “   i  simply  love  you  more  than  i  love  life  itself .   ” “   some  boys  kiss  me ,   some  boys  hug  me ,   i  think  they’re  okay .   ” “   the  boy  with  the  cold  hard  cash  is  always  mister  right .   ” “   you  know  that  we  are  living  in  a  material  world .   ” “   i  am  a  material  girl .   ” “   boys  may  come   &   boys  may  go .   ” “   experience  has  made  me  rich   &   now  they’re  after  me .   ” “   opposites  attract .   ” “   you  must  try  to  ignore  that  it  means  more  than  that .   ” “   what’s  love  got  to  do  with  it ??   ” “   who  needs  a  heart  when  a  heart  can  be  broken ??   ” “   it  scares  me  to  feel  this  way .   ” “   there’s  still  enough  time  to  figure  out  how  to  chase  my  blues  away .   ” “   i’ve  done  alright  up  ‘til  now .   ” “   i  wanna  dance  with  somebody  who  loves  me .   ” “   i’ve  been  in  love   &   lost  my  senses .   ” “   sooner  or  later ,   the  fever  ends ,   and  i  wind  up  feeling  down .   ” “   when  the  night  falls ,   my  lonely  heart  calls .   ” “   don’t  you  wanna  dance ??   ” “   i’m  sick   &   tired  of  everything .   ” “   all  i  do  is  eat   &   sleep   &   sing .   ” “   there  are  moments  when  i  think  i’m  going  crazy .   ” “   the  sight  of  you  will  prove  to  me  i’m  still  alive .   ” “   some  boys  take  a  beautiful  girl   &   hide  her  away  from  the  rest  of  the  world .   ” “   i  wanna  be  the  one  to  walk  in  the  sun .   ” “   you  could  never  know  what  it’s  like .   ” “   there’s  a cold   &   lonely  light  that  shines  from  you .   ” “   you’ll  wind  up  like  the  wreck  you  hide  behind  that  mask  you  use .   ” “   did  you  think  this  fool  could  never  win ??   ” “   i’m  still  standing  after  all  this  time .   ” “   i’m  picking  up  the  pieces  of  my  life  without  you  on  my  mind .   ” “   i’m  still  standing .   ” “   if  our  love  was  just  a  circus ,  you’d  be  a  clown  by  now .   ” “   heaven  is  a  place  on  earth .   ” “   they  say  in  heaven ,   love  comes  first .   ” “   we’ll  make  heaven  a  place  on  earth .   ” “   in  this  world ,   we’re  just  beginning  to  understand  the  miracle  of  living .   ” “   i  was  afraid  before ,   but  i’m  not  afraid  anymore .   ” “   when  you  dance ,  there’s  a  magic  that  must  be  love .   ” “   i’ll  be  coming  for  your  love ,   okay ??   ” “   i’ll  be  gone  in  a  day  or  two .   ” “   i’m  slowly  learning  that  life  is  okay  ??   ” “   it’s  no  better  to  be  safe  than  sorry .   ” “   you’re  all  the  things  i’ve  got  to  remember .   ” “   you’re  shying  away .   ” “   i’ll  be  coming  for  you ,   anyway .   ” “   sweet  dreams  are  made  of  this .   ” “   who  am  i  to  disagree  ??   ” “   everybody’s  looking  for  something .   ” “   keep  your  head  up .   ” “   it’s  gonna  take  a  lot  to  drag  me  away  from  you .   ” “   there’s  nothing  that  a  hundred  men  or  more  could  ever  do .   ” “   i  seek  to  cure  what’s  deep  inside .   ” “   i’m  frightened  of  this  thing  that  i’ve  become .   ” “   some  are  born  to  sing  the  blues .   ” “   sometimes  i  feel  i’ve  got  to  run away .   ” “   the  love  we  share  seems  to  go  nowhere .   ” “   once  i  ran  to  you .   now ,   i’ll  run  from  you .   ” “   you  need  someone  to  hold  you  tight .   ” “   don’t  touch  me ,   please .   ” “   i  love  you ,   though  you  hurt  me  so .   ” “   i  just  want  to  tell  you  how  i’m  feeling .   ” “   we’ve  known  each  other  for  so  long .   ” “   your  heart’s  been  aching ,   but  you’re  too  shy  to  say it .   ” “   you’re  turning  heads .   ” “   anything  you  wear  looks  good  on  you  especially .   ” “   there’s  nothing  i  can  tell  you  that  you  haven’t  already  heard  a  half  a million times ,   but  still ,   i’d  like  to  say  you  wear  it  well .  ” “   they  can’t  compete  with  you .   ” “   you’re  more  than  just  a  pretty  face .   ” “   you’ve  got  exactly  what  it  takes .   ” “   can  you  feel  it ,   too ??   ” “   i  toss   &   turn  in  my  bed  in  the  morning  when  i  think  about  you .   ” “   i  attempt  to  look  my  best  for  you .   ” “   you  sure  are  sweet .   ” “   would  you  mind  if  i  had  a  little  bit  more  of  your  time ??  ” “   just  keep  doing  what  you  do .   ”

[lewismonochromepepper]

Mono now wears wigs. He had cut his hair pretty short at one point and began collecting many wigs, every kind he could. Becoming more materialistic during his absence.

[lewismonochromepepper]

Mono “picked up a habit” of smoking during the time he was alone.

And by smoking, it’s pocky sticks. He’d make his own and carry it like he was actually smoking

[lewismonochromepepper]

CRUSHES

• “Wait. Have I been thinking of them this whole time?”

• “No. Bad brain. That’s my best friend. I’m not supposed to blush when I’m thinking about my best friend!”

• “This… This feels right. Being near them- It feels like the puzzle piece I was missing.”

• “Are you going to tell them?”

“And risk ruining our friendship? Or worse, them teasing me about it forever and ever? This is so going to go directly to their head.”

• “Okay. You can do this. Confess to the one person you thought you’d never have a crush on. Oh, who am I kidding- This is gonna be a mess!”

• “…I think I like you.”

“You’re probably the last one to realise this, bud.”

• [Screams into a pillow out of frustration] 

• “Why are you sitting alone in your room in the dark?”

“I told them I liked them by accident.”

“And?”

“They laughed.”

“Oh- Ouch.”

• “Awww, you have a crush on meeee. Adorable.”

“We’ll see if I’m still adorable when my fist meets your pretty face-”

[lewismonochromepepper]

21. A memory of the first time they did an activity they love

Send A Number to Experience One of My Muse’s Memories

The chill of cold air engulfs your entire being when you look around. It doesn’t matter which direction you look, there is nothing but snow and ice covering the land. The earth itself looks cracked in some places, but that’s further in the distance from where you find yourself. It’s not until you notice a large shadow taking over a stretch of the landscape that you bravely turn around.

Towering over you is a large structure, one that almost seems to touch the sky from where you are standing. The structure looks as if it’s made completely out of metal and stone, much of the metal curved in a particular way. There’s a giant set of stairs in front of you, leading to what you presume to be the entrance of this place. The temperature around you seems to drop as you make your way up the steps.

You can’t help but feel so small from where you are at the base of this tower. A name filters into your head as you stand before the open gates: ‘Icecrown Citadel.’

You step through the doors, leaving you in an open space. The walls inside the citadel are just as cold as they looked on the outside, flames of blue hanging as a light source within. You feel a shiver move down your spine when you see the pathway beneath your feet decorated in a pattern of skulls… almost as if it were partly made of them.

Something catches your eye, thankfully, to tear you away from the harsh aesthetic of this place. You blink when you see a familiar worgen passing you. Salena is walking with a group of… knights, all of them dressed in similar looking armor. There are various races in her group, but none you are too familiar with. You move around them so you can get a better look at Salena… noting the utter lack of any emotion present in both her eyes and face.

All their heads turn to one at the forefront of the group, your’s following them. His voice is loud, commanding, “You all are dismissed for the time being. Use it wisely. Your king will require you again soon.”

That sends another shiver down your spine.

You watch Salena as she walks away from the group, no change to her ‘expression.’ She walks through the citadel, passing other knights that look like her, as well as various creatures. Most of them look like skeletons and spiders, though both equally undead to each other. You hadn’t really noticed it before, but the glow in Salena’s own eyes is just as off-putting as everything else here.

You can’t really keep track of the layout of this place, simply following along at her side until she stops. The place you find yourself in looks just as chilling as anything else in this place, but you can see the unmistakable set up of anvils, tool racks, and what looks like forges with skulls on them. That’s a new one. You can see that at the far end of the room is another opening, but one that seems to lead to a balcony of some kind.

Salena had paused at the opening, but after a beat began to walk into the room. There are others here, working on what you can’t really tell. What you can tell is the metal they are working with is a light turquoise color. Your curiosity pulls you towards the pile of metal bars. As you stand next to them, you can hear something in your mind.

“They have turned against you... now, take your revenge…”

You quickly back away from the metal, returning your attention to Salena.

She’s moved over to one of the other knights, producing some of the same metal you just saw, but rather the shape looks more circular than the clean bars. Ore perhaps then. There is not much shared between the two in terms of words, the other leading her over to some other machines you don’t really recognize.

You watch as she processes the ore, heating it up, and hammering it until it is in the shape of the bars you saw earlier. You watch as the other knight comes over, looking over her work, “Crude, but it’ll work. Get started then.”

She doesn’t give so much as a nod before going over to the rack of tools, grabbing a couple before returning to the anvil. She takes the metal, seemingly unbothered by the strange whisper you heard before. She heats it up, using the hammer and anvil to help take shape. You lose track of time, simply in awe at watching her take one, maybe two bars, and craft it into a stylized blade. The last thing she does is take it over to the skull forge you saw before, watching her place it inside. You can see a magic flowing from her fingertips, watching as it carves out runes along the metal. When it’s done, she grabs it by the hilt, pulling it from the forge.

You may not be an expert on the craft, but from what you can tell, it looks well made.

Your head turns up as the knight comes over, taking the blade from her. He moves it around in his hands, swinging it a couple times. He hands it back to her, “It needs a lot of work. See to it you learn fast. We do not have the resources for you to waste on ‘trying.’”

She nods to the knight, returning to the anvil. You move to follow her, but the memory begins to fade out, and soon enough, turns to black.

[lewismonochromepepper]

/I’ve been thinking of ways to revamp monos world a little bit.

I still want to keep the whole ghost eat ghosts and corruption can make those ghosts demonic, but I also want a little bit more magic in it too, but on the down-low.

Like for example, witches might be prevalent, natural magic users may exist and they just don’t give off enough of a trail to be tracked unless they become more experienced with their power and magical abilities, and thus they need to up their security to keep themselves safe. Witches may be isolated from others, some may flourish in the city! But they have to be careful so they don’t jeopardize those around them.

There is also a possibility of witches giving blessings to folk who weren’t gifted with magical properties. Or - everyone has the ‘gift’ of wielding magic, but only few unlock it. Sticking with blessings and magic users being rare might be a better explanation.

So arthur would be - partially - a magic user since he’s a medium. But he’s a weak one because he can only detect and spot ghosts who aren’t making themselves present. He only gets vibes. Vivi probably would be a magical user that needs to be trained on order for her abilities to be harnessed, which mystery could possibly help her with.

[lewismonochromepepper]

28. A memory that strains a relationship

Send A Number to Experience One of My Muse’s Memories

You look around at the space you find yourself in. You are surprised when you find it’s a large office space. The structure of the area around the room and the doorway suggests this is an office within the Estate Salena lives at. The desk in front of you is stacked with so many papers that you can’t even seem to be able to tell them apart from one another. There’s an older gentleman sitting behind the papers, a hot coffee sitting at a free spot next to him.

To the side rests a fireplace, the heat almost engulfing you in its warmth. There’s an occupied couch residing in front of it, a woman in greek garbs listening to the crackle of flames. You can see scars near her eyes, a milky look over the eyes themselves…

She’s blind…

A sound turns your attention back to the doorway. There’s a knock before Salena comes into the room. The man places his lifted coffee back down, the woman setting down the tea she had been drinking from. Salena moved over to the desk, gazing at the man, “We have much to discuss.”

The man’s eyes turn up to her, both you and him watching as she takes a seat in one of the chairs sitting in front of the desk, “And what is it that we must discuss?”

“I've been able to learn some more about him from our outing.”

Outing?

“Oh? And what exactly did you learn?”

You watch Salena cross her legs, eyes narrowing to the man as she answers him, “I know I've told you before, but I reason to believe there's someone, or something, inside of him. I caught a glimpse of him when he bit me.” You blink at that, looking closer at Salena. It’s then you can see some rust-colored bandages along her hand and arm. True to fashion, she doesn’t seem at all bothered by this.

“He bit you? Or this.. thing bit you?”

“Yes. Far from the worst thing that's happened to me.” You can’t help but give a sigh at that. Of course she would say something like that.

“And what do you believe this thing is?”

“I can't really say for sure since I've only seen it a couple times, and even then, it wasn't for very long. A possession of some kind perhaps? I don't think it's some case of split personality.”

“A possession? Mmm... that could be rather problematic for us and that is something I do not need right now. Do you think he will submit to a psychological examination or even an inspection by some of our holy workers?”

As Salena lowers her head in thought, you can’t help but wonder who it is the two of them are speaking of, “Not willingly. He was already hesitant enough to go hunting with me, and I'm willing to bet that was because of whatever this entity was influencing him. The examination he might, but certainly not by one of the holy workers.”

The man at the desk narrows his eyes to her, a soft sigh emitting from his mouth, “Do you think that he is an immediate threat to the estate?”

“Not presently, especially not so long as I can keep an eye on him.”

“You won't always be around to watch him... and we cannot guarantee that he will be kept in check by you even during the times you are supervising him. It may be easier to just contain and study him and if need be. Eliminate him.”

You watch as Salena’s eyes narrow more at the man’s words, “He's not some kind of animal Alexander. And Malceum himself has been a good help to me since you hired him. He's talented.” Oh, that gives you at least some more context. You’ve heard Salena speak of ‘Alexander’ before, but never met the man in person. You’re not entirely sure what to make of him, but something that stands out is just how tired he looks. As for the other missing piece of information, they’ve been speaking about Malceum, Salena’s husband. You notice now that the ring Salena’s usually wearing is not present.

You turn your attention back to the conversation the two of them are having, “Talented or not.. the thing within him is an unknown variable and needs to be contained until we understand it. There are too many threats in the world already and I do not need one inside my own damned estate.”

“And if something happens then I can handle it.”

“Are we so sure about that, Salena?” You watch as Alexander reaches into his desk drawer, pulling out a file. You can see ‘Malceum Sorrowgrave’ written on the tab of the folder, “Alot of what you're telling me isn't in the dossier.”

“Of course it's not. Do you really think he's going to be so open with you about something like this? Do you think he's also going to mention his cannibalistic tendencies?”

His what?

“He is also a cannibal?”

“Yes, though from what I gather he's not happy about it.”

Who would be?

“Not happy that he has cannibalistic tendencies?”

“Put it this way Alexander. It's like the reason I go hunting. I am not proud of what I have to do to keep myself in check, but I have to do it anyway.” You can’t help but glance away at that comment. You’ve seen what she does when she goes ‘hunting.’

“And what does the eating of humanoid flesh keep in check for Malceum?”

“Well gee, I don't know Alexander. I don't judge people's habits or addictions.”

You watch Alexander’s gaze narrow to the point where it is a glare sent in Salena’s direction, “You will not speak to me in such a manner.” You would think Salena would have a remark to say to that, but she remains silent, her eyes narrowing before gazing to the side. Your attention turns to the couch by the fireplace, the sound of a cup being lowered to a saucer being what drew your attention there. The woman speaks, her voice far gentler than the man’s, “Dear, what do you believe his habit of feeding is suppressing or fulfilling?”

Salena sighs, “If anything, maybe keeping this entity in check somehow... or maybe he's been doing it for so long it's just something he can't stop... I don't really know…” You note that she seems more comfortable speaking with this woman than she does with Alexander.

“Thank you, my dear. It is good to at least have some small insight.”

“Yeah.. no problem..”

“What's bothering you? I know your voice well…”

“I don't know what you're talking about. Nothing's bothering me.” Ah… There’s the Salena you know.

“If you say so my dear…”

Your attention shifts back to Alexander, watching him as he lights a cigar. You see him exhale smoke when he speaks again, “Until we better understand this man.. we need to have him shackled and locked in one of our cells.”

Salena’s head snaps over to him, “That seems highly unnecessary.”

“Unnecessary? Nonsense! I believe it to be the safest path we could take.”

“He hasn't hurt anyone.”

Alexander reaches for the folder once again. There’s the sound of papers ruffling before some are laid across the desk. You can see there are a couple photos with some news clippings… the pictures… well they are quite gruesome… “He hasnt you say?”

You can see Salena's fur starting to stand up, “Fine, he hasn't hurt anyone here. And I can keep a watch on him.”

“I am not doubting your abilities but I am not yet convinced to take the chance.”

“Well why not?”

“Because there are more unknowns than knowns right now.”

“Then give me the chance to figure out the unknowns.”

“You have one month.”

What? Only one month? Surely whatever is wrong it would warrant more time than that.

“And after the month is over?”

What? You tilt your head at that. Does she really not see the problem with just accepting the idea that she would have a month to figure out what was going on?

“Depending on what you discover.. we either continue to employ him or we contain him.” You cringe a bit as you watch the reports Salena had picked up begin to crinkle in her grip. There’s the slight sound of ripping where her claws managed to latch into the paper, “Do you have a problem with that?”

“I don't like the idea of him being contained…:” Who would?

“And why is that if he turns out to be a threat? Did you forget our purpose?”

“Of course I haven't forgotten our purpose, but why should Malceum have to suffer if someone or something else is forcing him to do this stuff?”

“Because as far as we know there is no possible way to extract this entity and as far as the law is concerned, he is a murderer.”

“Then I'll find a way! My own world's got more options than your's!” You can’t help but look surprised. When was the last time you’d heard Salena raise her voice? Or if at all?

The glare from the man deepens, “Do not take that damned tone with me!”

Salena began to snarl, her tail lashing behind her, “I can handle this.”

“You have one month to handle it or else I will have the twins contain him for further study.”

If you thought the way Salena’s raised voice was a surprise, then the manner in which her face contorted into anger was even more so. Her fur seemed to bristle more, “Oh no. Don't you dare involve Marie. If I can't at the end of the month I'll contain him myself.”

You didn’t think a human could snarl as well as a wolf, but somehow Alexander seems to come close, pointing the end of his lit cigar at her, “At the end of the month timeframe it isn't your damned call to make anymore. Aaron and Marie will be the ones to subdue him.”

“I'm making it mine. I don't want them involved. I will not budge on this.”

“Who are you to demand such a thing of me?”

“Someone who fucking cares!”

You jerk back when you see Alexander slam his fist into the desk. He opens his mouth to say something, but the woman from before speaks up before he can, “Dear.. why don't you tell us your reasoning for wanting to be the one to handle Malceum if you fail to figure out anything during the next month?”

You watch as Salena gets up from her seat, casting one last glare to Alexander before going to join the woman. The name ‘Cassandra’ filters into your head when you look at her again, “It's... mostly Marie... I don't trust her, and I don't like her... how do I know she won't hurt him if they contain him...?”

“Why do you have such ill feelings towards your sister?”

Sister?

“She and I never got along... and she just seems so quick to eradicate things sometimes…”

“That is just how she is, my dear. Her upbringing did not.. give much chance for her to learn how to live in a normal society or have the knowledge of how people should act accordingly. You cannot blame her for that.”

“No.. I know.. I don't blame her for it.. but that doesn't mean I have to like it.. I don't want her hurting him..”

“Why don't you want her hurting him?”

“Because... because I care about him…”

“You care about him?”

“I... I see a lot of myself in him... I don't want him to turn out like I have…”

“Like you have? My dear.. what if he is already like you or has progressed farther than you have into his own personal oblivion.”

“Then I want to help him..”

“Help him how?”

“I don't know. I'll find a way.”

“I apologize for this task set before you.”

“Why are you apologizing to me?” You and Salena share the same look of confusion when Cassandra says nothing, but rather takes a sip of the tea she’s holding. There’s a small smile on her face when the cup leaves her lips. “Is it another vision...?” Vision?

“That is up for you to decide for yourself, my dear.”

Salena’s ears pull back a moment later, returning to a look you are much more familiar with, “I will do everything I can to help him..”

“Then you have my support in your endeavors but sadly the timeline must remain in place, my dear. Just don't lose yourself along the way.”

“I won't.. I just want his word that if the end of the month comes up.. I will be the one to contain him.. not the twins..”

“Oh don't worry. He will not argue against me.” You watch Cassandra give Alexander a sickingly sweet grin, which causes the man to lean back in his chair. He turns his gaze to the window, giving a puff of his cigar, “You're one of my beloved daughters, Salena. I put you in harm's way because that is what this family does to safeguard what little good is left in this world. However, I will not force you into danger that I can prevent. If after this month of time is up and you are unable to contain him, I will send the twins to aid you but Aaron will have orders to control Marie's more sadistic and psychotic tendencies.”

You can see the memory beginning to fade out. You hear Salena speaking, but it’s faint, “Not exactly being forced in harm's way when I'm willing... but fine... if I... can't contain him then that's fine…” After her words finally fade, everything turns to black.

[lewismonochromepepper]

//hey guys! My mono muse has been off the hook and I definitely want to go off hiatus sometime soon - maybe at the start of April or on my birthday!

[lewismonochromepepper]

19. A memory of someone they don’t see anymore

Send A Number to Experience One of My Muse’s Memories

You are unsure of where you are, as it does not look like any place you have been before. The air in the place you are seems to cloud, a bright green color held to them in the distance. Actually, now that you look around, the whole area seems to have a tint of green to it. What kind of place was this? The trees were twisted, nearly without any leaves, and you can swear the pattern on some of the trunks makes it look like the trees themselves are screaming. Pools of acid green water littered the land, dying grass along their shores.

It seemed like something straight out of a fantasy novel…

The name ‘Felwood’ comes to your mind, though you’re not sure where it came from. Looking around this place once more, you can make the connection.

Your feet find their way to the stone path, following it. You’re not sure why you’re here of all places, as nothing has happened so far. You find yourself following the path until a set of ruins cross your path. The structures here are broken, any part of their foundation covered by years worth of earth. From what you can tell, what is left of the structures, and even statues here are made of some kind of marble. It’s very detailed work, markings of nature and magic carved into the stone.

And gathered among these ruins are strange creatures. They look humanoid, but their skin looks… green? Blue? Purple? It’s a mix of all of them. They have horns coming out of their heads… fur growing along their shoulders… and have hooves for feet. Some of them look to be carrying bows, while others held daggers. What were they doing here?

A flash of something grabs your attention.

The gate is one you recognize, and so is the form that comes out not a moment later. It’s strange to you, seeing Salena step out of one of her gates without tumbling to the ground. Here, she has strolled through it, continuing to walk as if nothing happened. She’s dressed in one of the armor sets you’ve seen her show you before, blades attached to her hips.

You see the heads of the creatures inhabiting the ruins spin their heads around to her, readying their weapons…

You see her reaching for her own, fingers curling around the grips.

You blink as you watch Salena lower herself down to the ground, the arrows in the distance missing, or bouncing off the metal surrounding her with a ‘tink’. You see one of her feet move back, a pillar of ice shooting up at her side to take the next flurry of arrows. Her eyes narrowed, catching sight of the advancing ones with daggers. She moved to stand when something flew over her head.

A fireball! There were ones that knew magic as well?

You snap your head back over to the wolf? No that word’s not right. Worgen… That’s the one that your brain fills in its place.

She’s placed her back against the pillar she had made before, two more moving up at her sides. You can see small bits of steam from where the fire hits against the ice, but the ice itself is not taking as much damage as you are sure it should be. The archers seem to have grown tired of shooting at the pillars, adjusting themselves so they would be in front of her. You feel a sense of worry wash over you, especially when you see her smile of all things.

You see one hand move up, a familiar sight as a purple hand forms, reaching out for the creature closest to her. As it is pulled towards her, there is little hesitation shown as her other hand grips one of her blades, holding it out in front of her to impale the oncoming threat. You can see blood splatter across her armor, not that it seems to bother her. You can see the archers have pulled their bows back, fire dancing on the fingers of the others that lingered in the distance, the others running right for her.

The sound of arrows pass you as she holds the dead one in front of her like a shield. A wave of her hand, and a slight brightest to the glow of her unnatural eyes, there’s a replica of her blade floating at her side.

You watch the way her body moves, almost as if she is dancing with her enemies. The floating sword covers her blind spot from the bladed enemies. She has ditched her shield, hurling it at the archers once they have readied their arsonal again. When the fires come again, you are surprised to see their essence eaten away by a green shield encasing Salena.

You watch as her weapons make quick work of those around her, blood continuing to spill along her. When her gaze catches the archers once more, her stance changes slightly. You watch as icy spikes jut out of the ground, piercing through their bodies with noises you are too sickeningly familiar with.

That only leaves one set left.

You see her stand still, her eyes focused on them. Their magic readies, but pauses not a moment later. Their bodies twist in pain, the knight passing them as they fall. As you follow her, you see… worms? They’re around the bodies… eating at them. Rot begins to fill your nose. You hurry to catch up with the worgen now that her path is clear, her seemingly unbothered by what she had done, and not in pain as she normally would have been by now.

You both pause when a certain part of the ruins comes into view. It’s circular with water being held inside of it. You note that the water here is clear, not like the toxic rivers you had seen in passing. Resting near the wall is a sword? You watch as Salena steps forward, walking towards it. You can hear a voice in the air around you.

Well well. You’re a new face. I didn’t expect anyone to remember my existence.

You blink. Who was that? You see Salena cross her arms, “You’re not who I expected.”

Oh? Pray tell, who were you expecting?

“Someone by the name of Larregis.”

There’s a laugh that echoes in your ears. Oh! Ol’ Blackheart. He’s here. You must be desperate if you’ve come all this way looking for this old thing. What mess has he gotten himself into this time?

“That’s not really a matter that concerns you.”

Oh I think you’ll find it does. You see, this blade belongs to me. If you want it, you’re going to have to give me something in return. Is this mess you’ve involved yourself with worth that?

You can almost feel the grin of whomever this voice belongs to. You look over to Salena, and though the changes in her face are subtle, you can gather that she’s thinking really hard about her answer. Her hand reached out towards the hilt of the blade, “Yes, it is.”

You’ll be paying a debt back to me. You’ll serve me and you’ll do exactly as I tell you. Those are my terms. There is no bargaining.

You see her hesitate. It doesn’t last long as she continues the motion she had before, her fingers wrapping around the hilt, “Fine.” You can’t believe she would make a deal like this! You can feel a surge of magic around her and the weapon. With a close look, you can see strange symbols tattooing her left arm, or at least what you can see of the parts exposed from her armor. She pulls the sword out of the water, the metal tip ‘tinking’ as it connects with the stone wall. There's laughter that fills the air around you.

Looking forward to working with you.

You see her move one hand to her head, a new voice making its way to your ears. There’s a static to it, almost as if you are not meant to be hearing this, yet you are anyways.

“What the fuck just happened? Kingston, what have you done?”

“What was necessary.”

“Are you fully aware of what you’ve gotten yourself into.”

“No, but I am sure I will learn in time. And in that time, I’ll pay for the consequences of my actions. Right now; however, I need you. You’re my best bet at getting rid of Fehskir.”

“I am not whole like this. You’ll need to gather more parts of myself. This sword should be able to absorb them, and I can bring myself more together. With enough, I can probably pull what he has already taken.”

“Let’s hope… Where should I start looking then?”

You move to follow them, but the voices fade out as she starts to walk away. The memory begins to fade from your vision… then turning black.

[lewismonochromepepper]

Old friends

Something feels so off, mono couldn't put his finger on it. The last few days have been a mix of anxiously waiting for his family to return to the house and drowning out that overwhelming loneliness with chores and old episodes of sailor moon. The distractions were fleeting, but did their job. He wouldn't think until his mama greeted him or when Vivi texted him.

But a few questions continued to pricked regardless.

What was he going to do? Who was he?

Obviously he was Lewis pepper, twenty two years old and the beloved son of the peppers. Good caring older brother, music lover. Lonely. But besides that, the question still buds.

Mono wanted to do anything. He was anxious and tired and stressed over the building weight of emptiness pressing on his back. But no matter how much he wanted to do something, every time he would grab his pencils or some of his clay, another part of his mind hissed.

Mono needed to get out of the house.

How on earth did Vivi deal with wearing sweaters and layers so much? Mono wipes at his forehead, clearing off sweat. It made him feel slimy, but that was to be expected. His long pastel sweater covered his arms, and his hands and feet were covered. He wore a hat- one of his mothers- and it casted a heavy shadow over his face, and yet it didn't do much to keep him cool, probably because of his scarf and sunglasses. Every breath was uncomfortable and heated. The temperature pulsing under his sweater and spreading all throughout his skin. It was almost Unbearable.

Not that he wanted to even vaguely risk Taking it off. No one can see him, and no one should considering he was circling outside of tempo. The only people who knew that he was a ghost was his family, and his ghastly skin would probably be a dead giveaway if anyone saw him. So to keep himself concealed, he would just have to cover his entire body. Even his amulets were warm to the touch under all of his layers. Taking a walk around town wasn't exactly worth it. No matter how much it seemed like a good idea before.

It was nice only to think, but there was only so much he could think about. Every thought ended up at the same destination, no matter how much he wanted to simply ignore it all.

Who was he when he was alone…? He draws a blank.

Only when he was with someone else did he feel complete. Only when he was focused on someone else was he okay. So besides that, who is he-

“Oi.”

Mono's heart stops. Sucking in all of his breath, he straightens his shoulders in attempt to keep himself composed, but in the process brought him to his full height of seven feet. Idiota!

The one calling out to him was a small man who looked to have stepped out of a movie. Striped rainbow shirt that matched his cane. Cute little suspenders. A face full of smile lines and wrinkles and an inquisitive (yet almost judgmental) look pinned directly on him. He felt like a deer in headlights. The spotlight was casted directly on him, and the weight of the familiar old man’s stare was just as intense and hot as the sun beating on his back.

“Aint you hot? What’s with the get up?” The man smacks his lips and stands up from his wooden patio, ducking under the umbrella set up to block him from the shade. “C’mere, sit down for a drink. You look like you need it.”

There was the faint thought to run, but seeing the man wheeze as he stretched his foot to walk down the short steps, he was hit with nostalgia and familiarity that was impossible to ignore.

Mono rushed over, holding out hand and lightly cupping the mans arm. “Señor- please, why don’t you sit back down. I’ll share a drink with you.” Dammit, he didn’t want that! He should get home! Greg cannot find out!

Greg looks from him to the ground before bobbing his head, “why thank you, son. How polite of you-“ only to double take and squint up at him. “Señor-? Ha! Well I’d be damned, only the little pepper girls call me that. Along with their late brother.”

heck. Mono holds his breath and twists himself to help Gregory get back up onto his sandy platform. It had been built a few years back when Gregory was a boy and would complain about always getting sand in their clothes, the man told mono himself time and time again when he let the girls play in his yard. The seating arrangement was new. Cushioned seats and rocking chairs surrounding a glass table. An umbrella stood high and tall and casted shadows across the sun bleached wood. How long has it been since he stood here? Mono ignores the thought, opting to help Gregory take a seat closest to the water pitcher. Mono plucks it up and refills his glass, mindful of the lemons bobbing.

Gregory made a noise of contentment, nodding and grinning an adorable toothless smile at him. “Why thank you, boy! How thoughtful. Pour yourself a drink, and feel free to use a straw! We got a new case of silly straws for the kids. My grandson flyod barked and scoffed until we gave in. But I like using 'em for myself. Reminds me when my two were little.” Gregory laughs, tapping the plastic cup full of swoopy colorful straws.

As mono takes a seat, heart racing. He didn’t want to cry, but his eyes were moist as he listened to Greg. Floyd and Eli were just born a few years ago… How big have they gotten? “You’re too kind, señ- mister.”

“Of course, it’s not everyday we get someone new in this part of town. Most people stop by the restaurants and the tourist traps downtown. And don’t you worry about calling me señor. It’s nice.”

Mono nods flittingly, reaching over and quietly grabbing his own cup with his gloves hand, filling it up and popping a yellow straw in it. He pulls his sweater and bends his head to take a sip.

Gregory was watching him, thoughtfully, “Whats your name?” Mono stiffens. “I almost called you Lew when I saw you. Ya’ kinda remind me of him with how you were walking, all hunched over. Got a similar voice to you, and he’s just as tall, if not taller! Kinda spooked me for a minute, I thought you was him. Wouldn’t that be a surprise.” He let’s out a laugh, tinged with fondness that made mono’s heart ache and swell in tandem. “My bad. He’s the pepper girls late brother. It hasn’t been the same since he vanished. I can’t help but reminisce about that sweetheart.”

“I-…” he shouldn’t be here, but the more he sat the more mono knew he would be trapped… but with an old friend like this, he’d be happy to be trapped, “my name is Mono. It’s a little weird, isn’t it?”

“Mono? Like one-? I like it.”

“Thank you, señor. Whats your name? I want to call you something proper.”

“It’s Gregory. I’m the town grandpa,” he smiles and laughs again, “actually, pest killer. But whose to say a man can’t have multiple businesses?”

“I got the feeling you were a grandpa.” Mono smiles behind his scarf, “you look like the kind of man that all the kids would want to hang out with.”

“You’d be right! My wife and I ran a little ‘day care’ for all the neighborhood kids. Rascals, the lot of them.”

“I bet.” Mono chews on his lip, wanting to add more and talk more. Dammit. Arthur talked to him about being open, but he’s not supposed to reveal who he is… “I would love to watch the kids. I really like em-“

“Sonny, why dontcha take off your hat and that scarf of yours. I bet you’re sweltering under there.”

“Huh-?” Mono flinches, and his gaze flicks up to meet Greg’s, who leaned over the glass inspecting him. Mono’s mouth hangs open under his scarf and he shakes his head, curling in on himself, “I can’t. I- I have a skin condition.”

“Psh, that’s fine! I ain’t one to judge. Cmon, let me see you.”

“N-no. I- I’m fine with the heat.”

“Are you runnin’ from someone? I can being ya’ inside if you feel safer.”

“No, no, I’m not running from anyone. I just …” he wished he could lie, anything to get Gregory to back down, but nothing came to mind

“Well I can see you sweating. With all those layers I’d hate to see you get heat stroke. Unless it’s something like Vivi. She’s always doubling up. Then again, she’s always cold! Never could warm up no matter how much she tried.”

“……. A-alright señor. But.. promise me you won’t freak out? I want to keep a low profile, and I trust you.” It’s like the breath had been pulled from his lungs and tied into knots.

“I promise.” Okay. Okay, he can trust him. Gregory wasn’t one to make promises that he couldn’t keep.

Mono removes his hat and sets it gingerly on his lap, keeping his head lowered so his bangs cover his face, and then he pulls the scarf from his neck.

Gregory gasps quietly. Mono could tell. He doesn’t want to look up, not wanting to face the horror bound to be plastered on Gregories face. He wouldn’t be able to handle it. But still, mono lifts his head, so that way he could see.

And much to his surprise, Greg wasn’t scared. At least he didn’t seek that way. His mouth hung open and his body was splayed in awe.

Greg sputters, slapping around for his cane and shoving himself up, not daring to rip his gaze away from Mono.

“L-Lewis? Squirt?”

Mono’s set jaw softens at the nickname. His face twisting into one of sadness but also budding hope. He’s still as Gregory inches closer, his free hand reaching out and touching mono’s cheek.

“Is that really you..?”

Inhaling sharply, mono tries to nod. Leaning into gregories touch, his eyes dart to the silvery and beige planes of the glass, before those colors blur into fuzzy shapes. Closing his eyes, mono nods. Holding Greg’s hand over his cheek.

“Hello, señor.. I missed you.”

It’s impossible to tell what the astonishment on Greg’s face means. But Greg takes his arm and pulls, “junebug! Get out here! Lewis is home!”

The woman who appears in the glass door, meeting Greg halfway, screams the second she sees him. Dropping her apron and shoving pats Gregory and squeezing mono tightly around the waist. A sharp sting of pain rockets through mono’s chest from the scar, but he grit his teeth, it wasn’t enough to make jamila stop. He hugs her and Gregory as they close in on him.

“Lew baby! Where are you been? Goodness it’s been years!” She steps back, a clear frown pulling at her features but her own tears welling in her eyes. “Why are you wearing those glasses? Is the sun hurting your eyes-? Oh gosh, what happened to you…” she reaches up on the tips of her toes, cupping his cheeks, and mono leans into it fully, hunching over even more so she had an easier time.

“No, señora. I’m… fine.“ he’s lying, he’s lying to their faces and they loved him and he loves him, why should he have to lie? “I just - I went on a - on a trip?”

“Bullshit.” Her face is suddenly stern, cheeks puffing out, and she meets his eye passed his sunglasses, mono’s breath hitches, “you’ve been gone for two years. No warning or nothing! Your friends came back torn to bits and only recently do they have the light back in their eyes. Don’t lie to me mister, I know you just as well as your mother does, and you’re a bad liar.”

“Junebug, the boy just got back..” Greg touches her shoulder and she shrugs it off.

“I’d be willing to believe that if it wasn’t so long. There was no warning. Not even a letter!”

There’s that horrid heat behind his eyes which pulses like the heat under his sweater, slick and watery. The pain from his scar twitching and making his attention flicker. Mono tenses bit by bit. Unsure what to think and how it was suddenly brighter and colors were more strained. Jamila’s fierce Brown eyes bore holes in his, and mono grimaces.

“I… señora, I don’t think that’s - I can’t. I really- it’s not safe for me to say..” he murmurs quietly, pulling from her grasp. But she’s too steadfast.

“Well it’s not like we’ll just sit to the side if you’re under attack, squirt. You know that darn well.”

“But .. you won’t.. I don’t want you guys to - to be scared..” he shrinks, black tears sliding from under his sunglasses and staining jamilas thumb. Her eyes widen, and she pulls her hand away to look at the staining material. Only to return mono’s gaze intently.

“Nothing scares me now, spill.”

His breath hitches. A wild cacophony of dread and worry welling up in his stomach. He put himself here, brought them into this mess… now he needed to at *least be honest.*

Mono swallows carefully before shakily removing his glasses, averting his gaze away.

“Do you two believe in ghosts…?”

As it turns out, it wasn’t hard to believe In spirits when one shows up on your doorstep. For that, mono was grateful. Whipping the frosting one last time, mono sets it aside to set up a jar and a piping bag, scooping up the white frosting and packing as much in. He hums a small tune, going over the preparations for his *thank you gift.*

The weavers had a lot of family members, eleven in total, and that was even more people to reveal his secret to. Hopefully the cupcakes will butter them up enough.

“Lewis, cariño,” mama touches his shoulder, and mono flashes her a small smile, “would you like me to come with you?”

That’s right… mama nor papa were pleased that he went out on his own and revealed his undead status to a whole family, but they were close friends, trusted friends. Even if they were disappointed , they agreed to work with him in telling everyone, one step at a time.

Mono smiles in return and nods, “I’d like that.”

[lewismonochromepepper]

While at home

This will be a series of one shots about mono as he home, where he begins to question things about himself and ask what he really wants.

Dear diary,

Moving out has been weird. I never moved out officially, at least not until now. the timing probably could’ve been better. Arthur just got back… maybe that isn’t the right word, but he was just brought home after being kidnapped. The state of his body was heartbreaking. So heartbreaking, and I cried a lot. I had to resist tears whenever I was near Arthur, just from how horrifying it all was. And yet the entire time, I couldn’t stop thinking of my familia.

The timing could’ve been better, but after Valentine’s Day had come and gone, it was time for me to come home. I had talked about it with Arthur and Salena, and we made some last-minute adjustments to my charm, and then I was off.

Less to say… I didn’t think about how they would react when I showed up on their door, asking if I could stay there with them. Permanently. In hindsight, I should’ve given them at least a little bit of time, but I hadn’t, and when I asked if I could stay, they had pulled me in and into their loving embrace before I could even blink! Tight squeezes and then hands on his face.

That first night home was … hard. The transition period sucked. The girls wanted to spend time with me and mama y papa wanted to hear about arthur, but I was so tired that I wanted to hole up in my room for hours and sit around. I got to do so, later in the evening, but it was overwhelming.

The next few days felt like a blur. This time, it wasn’t a blur of gray days moving into each other, but excitement dancing throughout the hours of the day, filled with smiles and laughter and small heartfelt confessions as I spilled my heart to mama y Papa. They listened to me, and held me when I admited how scared I was. I didn’t know what else to do for my friends. I felt like I abandoned them.

Maybe it was selfish, but I dearly missed how papa would pull me into a hug and how mama would join. It was nice.

It slows down for just a few days after Valentines, and because of that the parents could afford a few days to help me settle. Oftentimes there was cake, and cookies. I would always try to get up early to make treats for the family, as well as to be sold in the restaurant considering … i wasn’t allowed in the kitchen. Or to work, because I was a walking health code violation, as Vivi put it. And then when the parents had to step away and check on things, i got to scoop up the little girls and Play with them in the backyard.

Then, Vivi and Arthur spent the night. I honestly didn’t expect the whirl wind blue and yellow to slam into me when I opened the door that day. But Vivi was unrelenting, and she and arthur dragged me around by my wrist. They had such amazing smiles. It was gorgeous, diary. They were gorgeous. I… I missed them a lot more than I thought I did. And they didn’t leave, as much as I told them to go to work and things like that. They refused.

We …. Gosh. We got - I’m embarrassed to even write it down! Goodness. But we got partially intimate. It’s hard when you’re in a house with so many people, but we made out for a little while and almost slept together. We hadn’t.

Vivi and arthur couldn’t stay afterward, since they already spent a few days at our home, they both had to go back home. I’m actually writing this since they both just left, and I have a moment to myself… I miss them. But perhaps I’ll see them tomorrow.

Goodnight diary

The light outside his window shone against his eyelids, warming them. He was half asleep, and quickly waking up. Mono nestles into his pillow, pulling the blanket tighter against his shoulders and keeping the warmth trapped. His body was heavy, and he wanted nothing more than to slip back into sleep for another few hours.

No. No he should get up. There was breakfast to cook and plans to make for the day. Perhaps the girls would like something more traditional?

Pushing himself up, mono stretches his limbs and crawls out of bed. Rubbing his eyes and squinting. It’s considerably brighter than it usually was when he woke up. He glanced out the window and his suspicions were confirmed, the sun was rising. Darnit, he didn’t mean to sleep in!

Mono fishes his clothes out of his closet and hastily dresses himself. Fastening his vest as he opens the door and pokes his head out.

There should have been a little body jogging through the halls ready to greet him, and then several more bouncing and clinging to his leg, if memory serves him correctly. Instead, the house is quiet. Too quiet. Mono frowns, looking up and down the hall way again before he makes his way to the living room. Peeking into his sisters rooms as he passed it. Only to be met with an empty room…

The only time it’s this silent is when everyone is asleep. He knew from the past few days and years ago when he would get up the earliest to prepare lunches and breakfasts for the girls. Where were they? Did they get hurt-…?

No. No. Stop that thought this instant. Mono lightly flicks his forehead, banishing the thought to the shadow realm where it belonged. That kind of thing didn’t happen here. It .. shouldn’t happen here, not like it did in the other realms. The fae couldn’t bother him here, so it’s fine! It’s … fine.

Better check the restaurant, just to be sure.

Unlike the house, the restaurant was in motion. Chatter of cooks and the sizzle of fresh food being prepared. It’s muffled from entrance within the home, but it settles his nerves a tad bit. Mama Y Papa should be in there and should be working.

Mono pushes open the door to the break room, peaking in slowly and catching sight of the spare employee sitting at the booths set up for them. He holds his breath, shutting it with a quiet click.

There’s no way he can let anyone see him. His parents and family was one thing, but there was no telling how people outside of them would respond to his presence. Muscles tense, mono chews on his lip. Then with a quick motion, he yanks out his phone and opens up his messenger. Should he text mama? No, she's probably busy with orders and managing everyone.

Opening up his fathers contact, he sends a quick message.

‘¡Buenos Dias papa! Do you know where the girls are? Acabo de despertar y no están aquí.’

Mono chews on his lip as he stares at the message. Watching the read symbol pop up and then the following triple dots…

‘Good morning, gordito. They are at school currently.’

‘Con la abeula?’

‘Sí, tienen que ponerse al día en su trabajo escolar.’

They have missed a few days of school, because mama y papa wanted them to spend time with him for a little bit. There’s a pang of guilt. Cayenne and paprika must be swamped, since the only one mono could recall actually doing their work was Belle. That was partially because he helped her with some of her English. He lets out a sigh and sends a thank you back, running a hand through his hair. They’re going to be gone for a good bit. Perhaps until six in the afternoon if he remembered right…. Mono whines.

No matter! He has the house to himself, so he can just … entertain himself for a bit.

One house and many cookies later, with bread rising in the fridge, mono stiffly sits down on the couch. He bites his lip, tensely staring at the window. His knee bounces. What was he going to do? There were a few more hours left and the house was still empty. What was there to do? Well - many things. He had all of his manga that he could read, shows he could pass the time watching. Nothing sticks out as entertaining. Just - wanting to talk to someone. At least when he lived with arthur he could interact with him, and it didn’t feel so lonely because they had each other - because he could still talk to him throughout the day, and if not him then Salena and their other friends. But now? Everyone is at work and unavailable.

Well, it wouldn’t hurt to just sit around, would it?

It did. Sitting around was possibly the worst thing he could have done. Not even thirty minutes passed before his mind betrayed him and became a spiral of negativity that was getting worse by the minute. He missed his friends, and arthur, and now that his familia was out and busy, that fact was even more apparent.

Monos up and pacing now, or really, ambling around and dragging his feet. He needed someone to talk to. Anyone! Or he was going to go mad…

Pulling out his iPod, mono puts it on shuffle. He bounces in a spot, tapping his foot to the beat as he Close his eyes and attempt to feel.. Let the music flow through him, and guide him towards something. Anything that could make this awful feeling go away. He didn't know what to do, but listening to music always helped him… it always comforted him. Just like being around his friends. His friends who…. Weren't there right now. They were at their own homes and he was at his. He should be happy that his family allowed him to come back and stay with them, considering he was…

Nevermind.

Mono turns up the volume. Sure enough it should be loud enough that he wouldnt have to think about anything.

And then he makes a crucial mistake. Sitting back down with the music playing. The world a steady stream of oranges, browns, pinks and reds…all fading Into something dull and Lack luster… It becomes gray. Everything, gray. What did he even want to do? he was alone, empty, and how mind dissipated into small sparks That lacked anything. Time passed, and the songs played on repeat, but mono couldn't hear it. Not until the front door opens and Belle waves, and paprika squeaks with delight and rushes over to him.

[lewismonochromepepper]

Dear diary,

Day one. It’s one in the morning. I’m in bed now and I’ve been staring at my ceiling for several hours. I got my lamp set up and I’m just sitting here. I’m… sad. For some reason.

I added the blankets to my bed - turns out I have a lot of them. I have all my plushies in my bed with me. I took out snowballs voice box because it was too scratchy and was waking me up. Albert sasi is very.. soft. It’s very nice.

But I keep … wanting to text arthur. Ask him how he is and what’s going on. But I don’t want to be clingy. I thought that maybe my crush would go away at some point, but it hasn’t, and when I saw him when we brought him home… it broke me. And I feel horrible that I wanted to leave and go home to somewhere stable and okay and … I wish arthur wouldn’t get hurt. I wish Salena wasn’t someone who had to hurt people to live. I wish we could have a normal life.

I’ll send them a letter soon.

Today I mostly played with the girls and set things up. It was late in the evening so they wanted to spend as much time with me as they could before bed. The girls wanted to play dress up and wanted to play with my stuffies. They kept mentioning school and art class. It seems mama y papa took them to an art club.

Mama y papa are kind. They’re very kind to me and they keep wanting to talk to me, and I want to talk to them too! Tell them everything, and explain what’s wrong. But I’m - overwhelmed. I just want to sit in my room. As much as I want to spend time with them as well, I feel off and different and … weird. I wanted to come home. Why am I so off? Is it the change in atmosphere? Sleeping somewhere else?

Perhaps it’s because of the snacks. mama y papa had a lot of valentines dishes that they didn’t sell. So I was allowed to pick whatever desserts I wanted. I was hesitant at first before I snatched quite a bit of it, and mama made a joke about how much more I ate than when I was alive. I was unsure what to do about it. And I almost put away everything back, but she insisted that I take it and then I enjoy myself. And yet … and yet I can’t. It’s so weird. I just feel like crying. Perhaps tomorrow I’ll talk to them about it, when I feel better.

I feel like an ungrateful child, I’ll make them breakfast for everyone tomorrow. Wake up early…

Goodnight

[lewismonochromepepper]

*gives Mono amulets so he's protected against ghosts and demons until he feels good enough to return*

It’s added to his growing collection of necklaces and charms. He’s grateful for it.