hogwartswirelessnetwork

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Who act the most like siblings even though they aren't?

Half the castle seems to have adopted @becclaw. A bit odd, isn’t it? Particularly @vladthelion calling her his sister as if he doesn’t already have a real sister of his own.

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Oliver and Leo: romance or bromance?

Gro-mance, with the gro being for gross, of course. @olstarhopkins and @lionleos nauseate me with the way they behave towards one another, whether it’s platonic or romantic. 

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What are your predictions for Easter break drama?

My money is on the usual. Someone will cheat at the Ministry’s Easter Egg hunt, someone else will cry, students will embarrass themselves and ruin their chances of ever being employed by the Ministry of Magic... A bit predictable, really. Although given that Easter is a family holiday, perhaps there’ll be a blowout at home between siblings. Who will it be? @zacboot and @zoeboot? @gwen-peakes and @gavin-peakes again? @scarletandgoldstein and @becclaw? @lionsandkrum and @vladthelion? I’m waiting. Don’t disappoint me.

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Who do you think will win the Easter Egg Roll?

I personally think I will be the victor, but if I can’t take home the prize... Well, @nobodyputskelseyinthecorner has been very intense about it. Perhaps a bit too intense. I wouldn’t put it past her to cheat to make sure she wins. 

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Who do you think will be the next pair to hook up around here?

Myself and @urquhartofslytherin. Although should that fall through, I’d wager something is brewing between @codeandchill and @shawn-morse.

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What is the worst food they serve in the Great Hall?

Blood pudding. It’s not just the worst food in the Great Hall, it’s the worst food in the whole world.

hihgossip, 

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Do you two ship Brian and Shawn?

Not really. They look a bit like the same person to me. And do they have anything in common besides being gay? At least they’re not thirsting over @urquhartofslytherin, but still. 

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One word: Gavlivia.

One word: yes. Sorry, Lulu, I know you have delusions of grandeur and think you can date a beautiful boy two years above you, but @gavin-peakes and @olivia–jordan would be much better suited for one another. Have they done something recently to spur your interest in them, anonymous? Do tell us the details of their tryst.

Yeah, I’m obviously the one with delusions of grandeur. But I don’t see it, Gavin deserves someone sweet and encouraging - not a dream crusher like Olivia Jordan.

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Bed, wed, behead: the Boot siblings.

Bed: @zoeboot as there’s no chance of accidental procreation in a female/female sexual encounter.Wed: Jeremy, as he’s the most respectable of the clan by far.Behead: @zacboot. He’s not a fellow Slytherin, and he’s also a risk for impregnating me with a vertically stunted child. No thank you.

Yikes! That’s a little weird but...

Bed: Zoe, she’s so pretty! But I don’t actually feel like we have much in common.Wed: Zac. I mean, he’s no Gavin but he’s in a band and he treats his cat really well...so he’d probably treat his wife pretty well?Behead: Jeremy. He skeeves me out and he seems to have something going on with @olivia--jordan, and I don’t want her murdering me in my sleep.

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Do you think there's any chance of a student teacher affair around here?

Get your heads out of the gutter. I may not like all of the members of the Hogwarts faculty but aside from Professor Binns and Professor Firenze, they all seem qualified. And the unqualified ones can’t really “hook up” with humans, so no.

I don’t think Professor Firenze thinks enough of us to interbreed. Much as several female students might wish otherwise. Professor Barbieri seems to be the skeevy old man type though, all the girls we see him with in Hogsmeade look awfully young for him.

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If someone else was going to run the Hogwarts Herald, who would you nominate?

I think that the fault lies not with @alexishaleclaw for not doing her job, but with the faculty of Hogwarts for allowing such mediocrity. I don’t know that anyone else would be better with such terrible mentorship, but if I had to guess, @urquhartofslytherin could get the job done. He could get any job done. Isn’t he dreamy?

Obviously it’d be Mei Burke! She’s sweet, smart, and would probably be a lot more productive.

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If you two were different dog breeds, what kind of dogs would you be??

I would be a canine of the three-headed variety.

Well, at least she’s self aware. According to Playbuzz, I should have a golden retriever but I really don’t want a dog that big. Maybe something adorable and high energy like a corgi!

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Who in the school do you think would be the grossest smelling Amortentia and what would it smell like??

My wager would be that whoever is in love with @creaturekidcaleb will get a whiff of the worst love potion the world has ever seen. After all, the rumor in the hallways is that he wears the same two pairs of pants everyday and never washes them.

I bet Winston’s Amortentia smells like dung bombs!

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Most likely in the school to be a vampire in disguise?? An alien? A ghost who doesnt know they're dead yet?

I don’t feel like discussing this dreadful vampire business again. You can find my previous guesses here. As for an alien, I would not be surprised if @lionleos and @zacboot and even @fabulousfawley were sent here from a planet that worships cats. And @tara-goyle seems rather dead inside. @ghostlyparker must be disappointed that she’s not a year older so she can’t live with that ghost of a girl.

I would not be surprised at all if Ben Pucey turned out to be an alien. That kid can be seriously weird sometimes. I think Blair is way too obsessed with money to be a vamp, but maybe she could be a vengeance demon like Anya from Buffy. I could definitely see @shawn-morse being a ghost, given his ancient taste in fashion. As for who really is a bloodsucker? Maybe that’s what @creaturekidcaleb is really doing in the forest all the time. I bet if we look, there’s some dead unicorns lurking around.

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Who would you rather threesome with, Zac and Zoe or Gwen and Gavin?

@gavin-peakes and @gwen-peakes, certainly, are preferable to @zacboot and @zoeboot. Given that every sexual encounter runs a risk of pregnancy, I’m not taking any chances. I’m small enough in stature without procreating with someone as short as @zacboot.

This may easily be the grossest thing I’ve ever heard. But technically, a threesome with two other girls wouldn’t risk pregnancy. And I refuse to chose between your incest trios. As much as I’d like to hook up with Gavin, someday when I’m ready for sex, I don’t want to emotionally scar him in the process.

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This goes out to @lionleos.

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Can you play Grenade for Leo Spinnet??? It's his favorite song!!

I have to, but I am leaving this radio booth immediately after I start playing it. Merlin, how awful.