#hihalice

[random-edits]

Alice Churchill: That smugness of yours really is an attractive quality.

Ana Krum: Thank you. It was either that or get my hair highlighted. Smugness is easier to maintain.

[hogwartswirelessnetwork]

if there was a Mr./Ms. Hogwarts competition, who do you girls would be the best competitors?

Well, would we first split people into houses instead of countries of origin as front runners and then crown the queen. I’m going to do it either way because it sounds fun for me!

Mr. / Ms. Gryffindor: @lionsandkrum​ and @vladthelion​ seem to be the obvious choices here! They’re very pretty, athletic, and Ana’s also got a razor sharp wit which would be great for answering those questions about world peace. Of course, she might come off a little sarcastic while doing so knowing her.

Mr. / Ms. Hufflepuff: @andie-longbottom​ seems like the kind of girl who would proclaim her perfect day is May 25th because it’s not too hot, not too cold and all you need is a light jacket so let’s go with her. And I guess Tim because he’s got all those social justice issues down, but they would also keep him from getting to the finals.

Mr. / Ms. Ravenclaw: While @becclaw​ kind of looks like the blonde beauty queen perfect image, I’m going to go with Lydia. She’s well-rounded enough to make it pretty far. And Isaac would obviously charm his way into the hearts of Hogwarts by just smiling at people…or taking his shirt off.

Mr. / Ms. Slytherin: @zabinilegacy​ is the obvious choice. She has no problem being fake for personal gain, but she really wouldn’t stir up the heartstrings of anyone involved. And Sam would probably just grin and win this, he seems to have quite the effect on the ladies.

Mr. / Ms. Hogwarts: @badgerjustin​ is sweet, pretty, and sincere enough to take home the crown! And in a complete converse of that @fabulousfawley​ would be his queen. She’s shallow, materialistic, and slightly unaware of reality just like any real beauty queen would be. Plus, they look pretty good together.

Now for a most important bonus category Miss slash Mister Congeniality! This really matters more than any crown if you love Sandra Bullock as much as I do. And I hereby nominate @scarletandgoldstein​ and @gavin-peakes​. They’re both obviously too sassy and not appealing enough to the masses to go all the way, but they’ve got hearts of gold, they’re a lot of fun, and they’re not bad to look at either.

Lulu’s way of doing this is so tedious. Bloody well, I wish I’d gotten to go first so I wouldn’t have to follow her formula. Yet now I’m trapped, so here’s my best effort.

Mr. & Mrs. Gryffindor: @nostringschandler and Hunter Liew. They’re an underappreciated pair, with a strong friendship and good looks. Chandler’s supposedly well-rounded, what with art club and Quidditch, and Hunter seems passionate about rights. That unfortunately makes for a winning combination, despite my personal feelings about them.

Mr. & Mrs. Ravenclaw: Perhaps @shawn-morse. He has the potential to be more interesting than he is, he just needs to take some advice from me and Lulu about how to make his radio show more interesting. I’ve heard he’s good looking, though, so let’s give him the nod and pair him with his “cute” blonde Prefect counterpart, @codeandchill. She wouldn’t win, Merlin forbid, but she’d make the audience laugh with all her incoherent sputtering. No composure, that one. It’s like feeding a lamb to the lions.

Mr. & Mrs. Hufflepuff: @duncanwhitby and Bradley Smith are practically the same person to me, but I think Duncan is the cuter one? Or the smarter one? I can’t remember, but I’m going to trust my gut and give this nod to him. Then I may as well pair him with Brittany Wenlock, since she’s got that sob story about falling off her broom. That’ll carry her quite a long way.

Mr. & Mrs. Slytherin: Nearly everyone in our house is qualified for this, but I’m sure it’ll come as no surprise that my vote goes to @urquhartofslytherin. We’ll pair him with @olivia–jordan, the undervalued protegee of @zabinilegacy. Perhaps Mila trained her to reach almost perfection, but she just couldn’t make the cut.

Mr. & Mrs. Hogwarts: Unlike Lulu, I remembered that people actually have to compete to win. So choosing from my pre-selected competitors, I’d say broom girl, Brittany Wenlock, is going to be Mrs. Hogwarts. As for who stands beside her… I tried very hard to choose someone else, but I just can’t. @urquhartofslytherin, congratulations, no one else deserves this honor as much as you! I’m so very sorry for sticking you with a Hufflepuff who can’t even properly stay on her own broom.

And no bonus categories for me, because they’re ridiculous. Lulu, why waste your time with such stupid movies? 

[becclaw]

Jules, Alice, Aubrey, Isaac, Ana, Jeremy

send 6 characters/people and i’ll tell you who i would:

do the sexy love™ with: @aubrey-flint, you were the last one left, I hope this isn’t too weird!

sacrifice myself for: @scarletandgoldstein. 

kick: @bcct as a reminder to be nicer to his siblings!

take to prom: @codeandchill

abandon in jurassic park: @isaacfawcett, you like adventures, right?

push off a bridge: @lionsandkrum, for the same reason I pushed Leo off a bridge -- she’s a great flyer, she might even think it’s fun!

[hogwartswirelessnetwork]

Who in the castle most resemble the six main Riverdale characters?

Who are the main six? And why leave out the adorable side characters!

Archie Andrews: @vladthelion seems pretty torn between being good at quidditch and being good with his regular life. Hopefully he’s not having a gross affair with a professor. But if one of the teachers is being Grundy-esque, my bet is on Professor Bole.

Betty Cooper: Well, @finestmclaggen would fit because of her constant snooping, but @codeandchill is more Betty material. They’re both blond, kind of nerdy, and constantly making weird facial expressions. Plus they both to seem have the unrequited love thing down pat.

Veronica Lodge: I’m going to go with Aubrey Flint on this one. Came from elsewhere to take our castle by storm, looks flawless and commands people with just a look. She’s edgy and dangerous enough to be V, for sure.

Jughead Jones: Oh, I really shouldn’t have to say this about anyone. Everyone in this school is too good to be Jughead! But I guess @alexishaleclaw is also kind of dark-minded and wants to write. But that’s obviously where the resemblance stops.

Cheryl Blossom: Mean girl who commands the school with an iron fist? Sometimes shows a glimmer of heart? It’s obviously @zabinilegacy. Is there even any question?

Josie McCoy: Future rockstar with impossible self standards? Must be Leo Spinnet! @tara-goyle could also fit into this role given her pressure induced rage blackouts though.

@brianpuff would be Kevin Keller, Luke Dawson is obv Reggie Mantle, @urquhartofslytherin can be Jason Blossom, and @gavin-peakes can be Valerie Brown since they both have great hair.

I can’t believe I had to research this drivel for you all. I refuse to do the side characters like Lulu, because I frankly don’t care, but as for the leads:

Archie Andrews: @badgerjustin is a dead ringer, is he not? And he’s about as painfully mediocre, so I’d say it’s a good fit.

Betty Cooper: Though @ameliapuff is a dead ringer, I would have to give this dishonor to @andie-longbottom. She’s so ‘gee, darn, I’m adorable’ that she screams girl next door.

Veronica Lodge: If only @fabulousfawley had a bit  more class, she might be able to fit the part. Instead, though, I’ll say @greatestollivander. She looks the part and must be rich by now off of all of her family’s wands. 

Cheryl Blossom: Flora Fortescue may have the hair but that’s all she has. @lionsandkrum could fit the bill. She seems like she’d be interested in an incestuous relationship with her twin, after all.

Jughead Jones: Bit of a wanker, isn’t he? Maybe @creaturekidcaleb. He seems like he’d have a secret emo freak streak.

Josie McCoy: Who’s in Frog Choir? @nobodyputskelseyinthecorner? She did orchestrate that girl band a while back. Let’s give this honor to her.

[hogwartswirelessnetwork]

Who in the castle do you think Alice would hack?

Considering her disgusting tendency to use dating apps at the ripe old age of 17, I’d assume @codeandchill plans to hack the student most likely to have lewd pictures of themselves saved on their laptop… @creaturekidcaleb, anyone?

While I don’t doubt that my lovely co-host has already hacked Caleb’s iCloud to look for proof of these lude pictures, it seems more likely that Alice would hack someone of the female persuasion to me. Maybe @scarletandgoldstein or @courtneylyons?

[hogwartswirelessnetwork]

Who do you think will be the next pair to hook up around here?

Myself and @urquhartofslytherin. Although should that fall through, I’d wager something is brewing between @codeandchill and @shawn-morse.

[hogwartswirelessnetwork]

so, jules and alice. Harold, they're lesbians or just gals being platonic pals?

I think it’s a bi-the-way deal with Jules, not sure about Alice. But I don’t think they’re just “gal pals”, at least not in @codeandchill‘s mind.

I would pay @scarletandgoldstein to seduce @codeandchill at this point, just so we can all stop hearing about her pointless dating app adventures. Do I think there’s something there, though? Doubtful. 

[hogwartswirelessnetwork]

Do you have any juicy new gossip about Alice?

I haven’t seen @codeandchill lately so no. Where is she? What is she doing? Did she finally embarrass herself so badly in front of @scarletandgoldstein that she’s gone to live in the dungeons out of shame? Stay tuned!

Perhaps she’s gone undercover to investigate all those men sending her pornography on Incendio. @codeandchill, how desperate can you be? You’re under 18 and you’re at boarding school. Get off the hook up sites!

[becclaw]

Alice (ง ͠ ͠° ل͜ °)ง Alexis

Alice! She’s practically my sister from another mister with how close she and Jules are, how could I not pick @codeandchill?

Send me (ง ͠ ͠° ل͜ °)ง + two names and my muse will say which one they'd back in a fight.

[becclaw]

Hello dearest sister from another mister. So as you can see, I’m absolutely shite at gifts, in fact, my mum insists I just stop trying to give them to people altogether but I keep on trying because I’d hate to not get you something for Christmas. Actually, you and Jules and Kelsey were the only ones I felt comfortable enough to get stuff for but uh. Yeah, so… I know how much you like candles and Pride and Prejudice. So that’s what the other two are for. The middle is from my mum. She said if there is anyone that she trusts with cooking in your family, its you or your dad. Apparently you’re a top chef in my mum’s eyes. And if that really is the case, I am gonna have to get cookies from you one day.

Anyway, Merry Chrismukkah Beccaw. I’m so glad to call you family, even though we aren’t actually. But you already knew that of course.  See you when we get back to school!

- Ali

[becclaw]

codeandchill replied to your post “Never have I ever had a mistletoe kiss.”

EVERYBODY HAS THOSE DAYS!

I couldn’t have said it any better myself, Ali!