#hihjustin

[random-edits]

Aubrey Flint: Justin, can I speak to you for a minute?

Justin Diamond: Ooooh, someone's in trouble.

Justin Diamond: It's me, I don't know why I did that.

[hogwartswirelessnetwork]

if there was a Mr./Ms. Hogwarts competition, who do you girls would be the best competitors?

Well, would we first split people into houses instead of countries of origin as front runners and then crown the queen. I’m going to do it either way because it sounds fun for me!

Mr. / Ms. Gryffindor: @lionsandkrum​ and @vladthelion​ seem to be the obvious choices here! They’re very pretty, athletic, and Ana’s also got a razor sharp wit which would be great for answering those questions about world peace. Of course, she might come off a little sarcastic while doing so knowing her.

Mr. / Ms. Hufflepuff: @andie-longbottom​ seems like the kind of girl who would proclaim her perfect day is May 25th because it’s not too hot, not too cold and all you need is a light jacket so let’s go with her. And I guess Tim because he’s got all those social justice issues down, but they would also keep him from getting to the finals.

Mr. / Ms. Ravenclaw: While @becclaw​ kind of looks like the blonde beauty queen perfect image, I’m going to go with Lydia. She’s well-rounded enough to make it pretty far. And Isaac would obviously charm his way into the hearts of Hogwarts by just smiling at people…or taking his shirt off.

Mr. / Ms. Slytherin: @zabinilegacy​ is the obvious choice. She has no problem being fake for personal gain, but she really wouldn’t stir up the heartstrings of anyone involved. And Sam would probably just grin and win this, he seems to have quite the effect on the ladies.

Mr. / Ms. Hogwarts: @badgerjustin​ is sweet, pretty, and sincere enough to take home the crown! And in a complete converse of that @fabulousfawley​ would be his queen. She’s shallow, materialistic, and slightly unaware of reality just like any real beauty queen would be. Plus, they look pretty good together.

Now for a most important bonus category Miss slash Mister Congeniality! This really matters more than any crown if you love Sandra Bullock as much as I do. And I hereby nominate @scarletandgoldstein​ and @gavin-peakes​. They’re both obviously too sassy and not appealing enough to the masses to go all the way, but they’ve got hearts of gold, they’re a lot of fun, and they’re not bad to look at either.

Lulu’s way of doing this is so tedious. Bloody well, I wish I’d gotten to go first so I wouldn’t have to follow her formula. Yet now I’m trapped, so here’s my best effort.

Mr. & Mrs. Gryffindor: @nostringschandler and Hunter Liew. They’re an underappreciated pair, with a strong friendship and good looks. Chandler’s supposedly well-rounded, what with art club and Quidditch, and Hunter seems passionate about rights. That unfortunately makes for a winning combination, despite my personal feelings about them.

Mr. & Mrs. Ravenclaw: Perhaps @shawn-morse. He has the potential to be more interesting than he is, he just needs to take some advice from me and Lulu about how to make his radio show more interesting. I’ve heard he’s good looking, though, so let’s give him the nod and pair him with his “cute” blonde Prefect counterpart, @codeandchill. She wouldn’t win, Merlin forbid, but she’d make the audience laugh with all her incoherent sputtering. No composure, that one. It’s like feeding a lamb to the lions.

Mr. & Mrs. Hufflepuff: @duncanwhitby and Bradley Smith are practically the same person to me, but I think Duncan is the cuter one? Or the smarter one? I can’t remember, but I’m going to trust my gut and give this nod to him. Then I may as well pair him with Brittany Wenlock, since she’s got that sob story about falling off her broom. That’ll carry her quite a long way.

Mr. & Mrs. Slytherin: Nearly everyone in our house is qualified for this, but I’m sure it’ll come as no surprise that my vote goes to @urquhartofslytherin. We’ll pair him with @olivia–jordan, the undervalued protegee of @zabinilegacy. Perhaps Mila trained her to reach almost perfection, but she just couldn’t make the cut.

Mr. & Mrs. Hogwarts: Unlike Lulu, I remembered that people actually have to compete to win. So choosing from my pre-selected competitors, I’d say broom girl, Brittany Wenlock, is going to be Mrs. Hogwarts. As for who stands beside her… I tried very hard to choose someone else, but I just can’t. @urquhartofslytherin, congratulations, no one else deserves this honor as much as you! I’m so very sorry for sticking you with a Hufflepuff who can’t even properly stay on her own broom.

And no bonus categories for me, because they’re ridiculous. Lulu, why waste your time with such stupid movies? 

[fabulousfawley]

Send ☁ for a hateful text. Send ♔ for a admiring text. Send ● for a text that wasn’t meant for you. Send ♬ for a desperate text.

Send ☁ for a hateful text. 

Blair: Ugh, I don’t even know why I thought that buying you new dress robes would make you more presentable anyway. You have stupid carrot hair.

Send ♔ for a admiring text. 

Blair: I don’t even know why I’m texting you since you like, probably put the devil emoji by my name and blocked my number or something, but I actually kind of admire you. I mean, it’s obvi to me that you don’t really have a lot, but you carry yourself with like, your head held high and I’m pretty sure no one else at Hogwarts has any idea because you like, never complain, so congrats. 

Send ● for a text that wasn’t meant for you.

Blair:  I don’t care if you guys think this Isaac thing is hopeless, Clara. I mean, it’s not like it could be any worse than Justin. When I wanted him to take me to a dance, he humiliated me all because I was nice enough to buy him new dress robes!

Send ♬ for a desperate text.

Blair: Ugh, you know I would never ask for your help with anything under normal circumstances, but this is an emergency. Princess got into a fight with another cat and she’s hurt and I’m scared to walk down to Professor Hagrid’s hut alone, can you come with us? Please, please, I don’t know what to do :(

text message memes.

[becclaw]

Send ☁ for a hateful text. Send ♔ for a admiring text. Send ● for a text that wasn’t meant for you. Send ♬ for a desperate text.

Send ☁ for a hateful text. 

Becca: At the risk of sounding like a Hufflepuff hater... Why do some Hufflepuff accessories look mustard yellow instead of looking like sunshine? WHO LIKES MUSTARD MORE THAN THEY LIKE THE SUN? That’s just so wrong! 

Send ♔ for a admiring text. 

Becca: Oh my gosh, this seems like such a silly thing to compliment you on, but I just -- thank you for being such a good friend to Aubrey! I try so hard to be nice to her and Jade, but neither one of them seems to want to be my friend, really, and well... it’s just nice to see her actually smile when she’s around you. You’re an amazing person for getting through to her like that

Send ● for a text that wasn’t meant for you. 

Becca: I don’t get it, Kels! You’re so pro the idea of Sam and Flora, and Sam’s actually mean to Flora. Blair and Justin clearly just had some kind of misunderstanding that needs to be resolved, why don’t you think they’re cute, too??? It’s like Sam and Flora but BETTER. Becca: Merlin, I am so, so sorry. Surprise? Fourth year girls gossip about everyone, oops.

Send ♬ for a desperate text.

Becca: So I don’t know if you have any interests in Ancient Runes at all, but Kelsey and Gwen convinced me to join the club and said that if they get enough interest, there’ll be a trip to a site in Mexico this summer. I think you’d have a lot of fun, can you pretty please join the club so that we can get enough numbers to go?? I know it would mean a lot to them! 

text message memes.

[random-edits]

Austin Solano: Stephanie - she was here. I can feel it.

Justin Diamond: What? She hasn't been here, has she?

Austin Solano: Smell that?

Justin Diamond: Smell what?

Austin Solano: The room - it smells like Chanel No. 5 and disappointment.