gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

“you talk like a smart/pretentious person” actually I just forget simple words constantly and am forced to rummage through my brain for the nearest synonym, which is usually twice as long and needlessly specific

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

haha

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL LESBIAN DAY!!!

it would be really cool if I could celebrate it with someone someday haha

haha

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

A porcupine’s Halloween present (+ original sound effects)

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

International Trump supporter found in the wild:

"I think the way he's handling the immigrant terrorists is amazing and he'll treat Putin with the same ferocity"

later:

"I would immigrate to America just to vote for trump"

...That would make you the terrorist, babe? 🤨

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

platonic kissing.

platonic cuddling.

platonic love and affection.

petting, head scratches.

biting your friends?

open conversations about physical affection, talking about what you do and don't like

you agree

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

I just wanted to add my two cents on anti-aging and the fear of growing old.

As someone who has struggled with suicidal thoughts and self harm, I always thought I wouldn't survive past 20. I neglected my health, hygiene and self-care because I didn't think I was going to make it long enough for it to matter.

Now that I've been in recovery and I'm feeling the most healthy I've ever been, I have realised that I want to live a longer life. I want to age. I want to grow as a person and experience all the life stages I can.

The day I get my first wrinkle, my first grey hair - I will know that I have made it farther than I ever thought was possible 2 years ago. To me the signs of aging are like trophies. Wrinkles, stretch marks, grey hair - these all signify to me that I have grown. All of these marks or blemishes don't compare to the scars I would've had if I kept thinking I wouldn't live long.

Wrinkles show that I've experienced emotions, laughter, tears, anger - things I didn't have when I was in the darkest parts of my depression. I didn't feel a thing. So getting to develop laugh lines or frown lines or whatever will arise is a sign to me that I have felt things wholeheartedly.

To me, aging is a privilege.

Sure I'm still terrified of a lot of things in life I'll have to face. I'm scared of the unstable market of the career I'm choosing, I'm terrified of losing my parents, of losing my friends, of illness and a decrease in health. I'm terrified of getting cancer or alzheimer's - two things that run in my family. All these things come with living a longer life than 20. But at least I would've lived. I would hopefully be able to fall in love, to make more friends along the way, to graduate uni, to find fulfilment in the job I adore, to fail, to struggle, to overcome. To grieve and heal and hold precious memories.

Aging to me, is something beautiful.

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

The moment you decide that horrific violence is okay if it's aimed at Bad Guys™, you immediately have an incentive to categorize all of your "enemies" as Bad Guys™ in order to justify violence to them. They are not people anymore, they aren't complex and diverse human beings with their own motivations and lives and desires, they are the Bad Guys™ and everything done to them (no matter how horrific or indefensible in any other situation) is okay because it's for a Good Cause™.

The only way to not fall into that sort of mindset is to just not let yourself create exceptions for your basic morals. And that isn't EASY, you have to correct yourself constantly and break away from people and blogs and new sources and the like that push dehumanizing and violent narratives, but it's the only way to approach sensitive and important topics with kindness and compassion rather than hate and anger.

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

I just wanna talk about the concept for All Stars 9 of Drag Race for a minute cuz I have some thoughts.

To me, turning charity into a competition isn't the way to go about it. That is not how charity is done. Pitting charities against one another gives me the ick and makes this season unwatchable for me. As someone who comes from charity-worker parents it really just isn't how you do things.

Now if one girl doesn't win a challenge AND the lip-sync at all this season their charity gets nada. You're also making contestants block each other which could force them to potentially consider which charity deserves it most which is big moral baggage. I just don't think this format works for this at all.

Then you're roping it into propaganda (propaganda isn't always bad, it's just relaying a message in a campaign format) that can save the image of drag artists and trans people into charity which feels so forced and feels like virtue signalling. It comes off like this charity season is just a tool for them to say "hey look at how cool drag queens are, we're good people!" It's exactly the same in essence as billionaires donating to charity to lower their taxes. Just a tool.

It makes the season completely unwatchable to me and it sucks cuz I love the cast and know they're gonna ace it but I just feel sick to my stomach when I watch it. I had to watch episode 1 in three separate sessions because of it and I don't think I'm watching the season in full this time.

They could've done a live charity ball for the finale asking the audience to help donate along with the prizes, they could've made a statement by not having a season and taking all the prizes and costs that a normal season would require and splitting that amongst a bunch of charities. Or have the same cast do a normal season while repping charities that the audience can donate to or that they can choose to give their prizes to. No blocking, no stars, non-elimination. They can come up with a better format with the same concept. There's way more options than what they did. Trying to mix this format with charity in the way that they did makes this feel like a stunt. It's completely demeaning to the people (and dogs) they're raising money for.

Now it feels gross, having people walk down a runway in an outfit that's probably more expensive than the money they're gonna win for their charities. Just give the money you spent on the outfits to the charities. And this is not the contestants faults at all, they all seem genuinely interested in raising money for charity, but the way this is going down just isn't what charity should be.

It feels like something out of Dynasty. Like those charity auctions and stuff - it's rich people bullshit in my book.

Sure you'll be making a difference somehow but the intentions just feel completely gross and condescending.

Just an out of touch mess that I'm so disappointed in...

To be clear, this is mainly towards the producers and anyone who had a hand in the format and the execution. No hate to the queens, I love all of them and wish they didn't get caught up in this.

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

Bottoms is not camp it's bad writing, I'm not sorry.

This isn't satire or absurdism, this is horrible writing that makes no sense that's being packaged as "Yes it's meant to be that way". And then just add blood. Yay. best movie ever.

Here I was, hoping for a cute campy time but no I got awful people doing awful things and ending up together when they should stay far far FAR away from eachother. I was actively rooting against everyone in this movie, except the love interests. The only reason the main asshole lesbian apologised was because the plot called for it and the other one appropriated the trauma of what it's like to be in jail to get laid and got to keep the girl in the end. Then they distract the crowd through fetishism, yay.

There's a line that separates satire from the thing that it's mocking and the writers had no idea what that line was. This was "haha, lesbians only want relationship with girl if they can fuck haha", no commentary. It was purely a stereotype with no, absolutely NO argument against it. Neither one of the "protagonists" learned their lesson. Everyone just became worse people overall by the end.

Also satire and absurdism are not the same things and are in fact practically opposites. Satire has a goal in mind. It uses all the chaos and exaggeration to mock the thing it's commenting on for a goal of speaking on the situation and it's flaws. Absurdism is the goal of showcasing how meaningless life is and that only you can make your own meaning in it. This film achieves neither!

How is this rated so highly??

Was it funny? Yeah. Did it make some great one line satire jabs? Yeah. But did the satire extend past a one-liner? NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT! It was just frustrating me to no end. Aghhh why can't we have good gay TV 😭😭

Great let's make the one good lesbian character and voice of reason a bomber. great. just great. god i am heated 🥴 i feel like my face is burning up from the rage 😭

How is this satire? What was the message? No seriously what was the message they were trying to convey with this? There were so many plotlines that just were not flushed out at all?? Why were the murders of the previous football players not investigated? Why are these schools still allowed to compete against each other? Why was there that guy in the leather jacket who wrote down plans to bomb the school when he did nothing in the end?

They brought up so many themes that could've changed people's lives if they handled them right but they never expanded on them? I kept waiting for it to get real and actually handle these heavy topics it was bringing up but they never did and now those heavy topics are just gonna seem like jokes to anyone watching who's dealt with these issues. This isn't how you do commentary. You don't just bring up "Oh I've been assaulted many many times" about a character and just move on with a different conversation and never address it again??? this is supposed to be one of the main love interests?????

Wtf movie???

nah I can't, I'm out. I'm done.

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

Update on Benny the Spooder: He pulled a classic Benny where he was out and about when I came in and then snuck back into le shadows. What I now can see is that it wasn't a "hiding so I can kill you" type deal, it's more goofy than that. We probably both went "oh shit" when I walked in, we stood in awkward silence for a bit and when I looked away to pick up my tooth brush, he said, "yeah I'll just... get outta your hair" with an awkward smile. So in short we are old school acquaintances who saw each other at the mall. Progress!

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Update on Benny the Spooder: The lil dude came back to stop by and I was actually pleasantly surprised to see him. I'd call that progress. He either just dropped in quick or he's just chillen underneath the cabinet which i don't mind honestly. Thanks Benny, the real g honestly.

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ooohhhhh yesss it was worth it to wake up! take that you motherfuckin speed machine. SMOOOOTHHH OPERATOORRR!!!!!

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also is it worth it to wake up at 5:45am tomorrow morning for F1 just to watch Verstappen win by 16 seconds again?

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Update on Benny the Spooder: He has moved out of my residence and I kinda miss seeing his spiny stringy hairball esc form next to my sink every night. Peace lil dude, you scared the shit outta me and then let me chill out with you bud. thanks dude, hope i dont see yo giant momma showin up at my door askin where you been 🩵🕷️

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

Update on Benny the Spooder: He is back in his OG position and has brought his legs together so he looks more tiny and manageable. ⭐⭐⭐⭐🚫 4/5 stars on yelp today for arachnophobia journey.

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Today on my unlearning arachnophobia journey: So I've been lettin this long legged bozzo called Benny camp out next to my sink so I can learn to be like "ah that? that's just Benny" Then tonight this motherfucker MOVES. He moves out of his lil side pocket and into the light like Beauty and the Mark of the Beast and I clock him and I'm like "ah yeah that? that's just Benny that MOVES now." and I keep checkin him and I move my head and he's gone. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS GONE. I look a bit closer and he's returned to his original place and I'm like "okay. That's just Benny, the guy that's considerate and backs up when you're freaked out." Nope. I checked back in and he's FULLY GONE NOW. So now I'm like "Ah shit, that's Benny the guy who's planning an assassination sneak attack."

Long story short I had to finish flossing in the other bathroom. So... progress?

[gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

Hey kids of the internet... let auntie gay talk to you for a minute. There is so much stuff on the internet and I know that sounds exciting and it is, but it can also be really scary. I grew up in the high of creepypastas, gore fanart and messed up erotica. It scarred me for life. Shock value content practically rewired my brain in the worst ways. There are things I like that I shouldn't know I like yet.

Example: I did my first bdsm test when I was 14 and almost half of the categories were over 50%. That's not normal. You shouldn't know about that at 14. I'm a profound supporter for kink obviously but I shouldn't know so much about it before I'm even an adult.

Yes, has most of the stuff I've seen in kink been great and fun? Sure. Has a substantial portion been too much for me? Yes. Did those things stick with me for life and eat at me at night? Yes. It screwed with my head and endorphins made me believe I liked it in the moment and after the content was over I was messed up for days.

Kids should not have access to this stuff. And that's just sexual stuff like porn. There's even worse out there. Graphic gore fanart, explicit true crime, exposure to addiction and harmful behaviour. These are all things I found when I was like 12. To give you the context of 12 year old life, I had a mural of huge pink pony stickers on my walls and still wore neon yellow pants with neon orange jackets.

Parents, kids can still have their privacy but you need to monitor what they are consuming. There's too much out there for you to not do this anymore. Put in safeguards, use YouTube kids, put on safe search etc. There needs to be more options for child safety but these are all the bare minimum. Do check ins.

It is really really important. All of these things have made me desensitized to borderline graphic torture and has messed with my view on relationships and sex and all of those intimate happy things. Once you see something it snowballs.

Parents, look out for your kids. Kids. Realise the danger. If you've seen stuff already, try to limit your own use, be cautious on what you think you can handle, better safe than traumatised. It's hard. It's already in your head now you can't go back to before the exposure but you can limit how much farther you go. It can always get worse than what you've seen. And that isn't a challenge or meant to be enticing. That's a bad thing that you should not seek out. Ask for help to limit your use, if you see videos make sure to click the "not interested" button and it might slowly dwindle out of your feed.

I get that most of you don't care that this is what you're exposed to but for those of you who can feel the same nausea in the pit of your stomach when I'm talking about seeing too much... this is for you. Please. Take my advice and try to stop.

Your future self will thank you more than you could realise. ❤️