cydneyfrench

[cydneyfrench]

The Hill

I realized while I was on the hill the real power of Spirit.  I knew it intellectually before I went but  still I  prayed for a sign of the power I believe in, born from our environment, our consciousness, our connections.  No one will ever convince me that magic doesn't exist as a result.  I've seen things that are unexplainable, but for this.  

I came to an important lesson while I was there.  The veils are thinner than we imagine.  To see deeper into this reality, I had to allow myself to surrender into not knowing.  All my life, I have been able to sense or dream our present.  Not in any kind prophetic way.  More like a remembrance of what I already know has occurred, but only as it happens.  It's a mind twist.  And it's different than deja vu.  I can see things happen a split second before they do or know how an experience will look and taste as it unfolds.  But on the hill, I had no predictions or remembrances like that.  I went into it asking to be shown, concretely, the power of belief and its fruition.  I yearned for a sign that what I sense ACTUALLY IS.  My ego was all wrapped up inside the prayer.   Spirit saw into the heart of me, beyond my physical limitations....my humanness, into the realm that animates this vessel.  My true consciousness.  The SOUL.  The place of evolution.  

The nights I spent in the forest were a strange mix of physical discomforts, bug invasion, fear, and the intense desire to stay awake and bear witness to the darkness.  My teacher had told me that the night was where all the fun happened.  The physical effects of not eating and drinking felt more pronounced in the night, too.  I observed how my body was slowing down, processing a little less and a little less each day, each night.  My resistance, the urge to fight, was being ground out of me with every prayer I drummed and sang into.  By morning three, I was jotting down the impact of this adventure with longer looping handwriting and shorter messages, brought on by my fatigue.  More often than not, I drifted in and out of waking at night.  I was surfing a wispy landscape of disjointed dreams or vivid interactions with different Beings when I closed my eyes.  I remember feeling, in one of those rare moments of life, that I was truly safe in every way.  I was so thirsty that my mind chased itself into the deepest cracks and crevices of my soul looking for moisture.  I was appalled by the knowledge that people, children, feel like this everyday in our world.  The first inkling that I was soon to stand up for something important.

The third night I slept, I was plunged into intensely crisp and rich lands.  In one, I met an African man.  He stood before me, unattached to my suffering.  He was straightforward and direct with me.  

"Drink," he said, as he handed me a glass pint glass filled with water.  I lifted it to my lips and swallowed as I took him in.  Tall and dark, a simple shirt and shorts on him, flip flops on his feet.  

He said, "No, you must move your throat if you are to feel the water become real."  And I had to push myself to exert control over my swallowing ability.  I could visualize it as if it was something I was watching.  But I couldn't feel it happen at first.  I felt as though I was trying to swallow through slow motion.  I watched myself drink the first glass he handed me.  Towards the end, I exerted the will to move my throat and feel the wetness slide into my body.  I handed him the glass back.  Immediately, he handed me another.  

"Again."  His commands were gentle but firm.  "Try again."

I finished another glass.  He handed me more.  Several more glasses of liquid to rehydrate me.  

The morning of the fourth day, after this series of glass after glass of water, I awoke.  As was my habit, I rose to relieve myself in my designated spot.  I did not think of my night.  I did not think of much, rather taking in the sunshine and the ways the leaves were flickering in the light of the morning.   I looked around the forest knowing today was my final day on the hill, that I would be retrieved the following morning.  As I crouched, I began to pee.  And pee.  And pee.  My legs were so weak I had to brace myself against a tree until it was done.  I felt astonished.  I barely made water the day before.  Today, I was a fountain.  And then I remembered the African and he smiled in my mind.   I stumbled to my feet and headed for my drum.   

[cydneyfrench]

it shifts #cydneyfrench #oregon #election2016 #free #remember #awake #love #what #LIFT #unite #hold #freethought #nogoingback #pnw #portland #fopo #astonishment #reality #shift #evolution #revolution #rejection #shock #russia #china #usa #africa #india #europe #america #korea #iran #muslim #christian #hindu #native #african #tribe #indian #indigenous #buddist #UNIVERSE

[cydneyfrench]

Keep the wonder, child. Don't let the world harden your heart, nor steal your awe. Let the moon draw your eye skyward, bringing a smile to your lips. Please, oh please, don't grow up so fast. The world needs your whimsy and delight. Shine brightly so we remember what it is to love so purely....So we remember what it feels like to feel free. #cydneyfrench #oregon #powellbutte #landscape #liveauthentic #spiritdriven #LIFT #child #innocence #joy #photography #love #awake #remember #free (at Powell Butte Hiking Trails)

[cydneyfrench]

there is always more of this life to explore just around the bend. the unknown the unpredictability is part of the adventure. ~~~ KEEP GOING. ~~~ we've made it to here so far! #cydneyfrench #oregon #oregonexplored #pnw #bridge #explore #adventure #photography #pnwoutdoorwomen #pnwonderland #pnwlife #ohtheplaceswellgo #life #keepgoing #LIFT #spiritdriven #liveauthentic #landscape (at Hood River)

[cydneyfrench]

in the end. ~~~~~~~~ Detail WIP 110416 #cydneyfrench #art #paint #painting #artist #oregon #longing #shamanlife #LIFT #canvas #acrylic #animal #detail #wip #seek #channel #spiritdriven #liveauthentic #queen #kingdom (at Portland, Oregon)

[cydneyfrench]

This beauty arrived on the beach. It's a small stretch of beach that can only be accessed if you live on that street or the tide is very low, crossing the boulders from another larger beach. I happened to be staying on that little street and had walked down with Michael and the dogs to say hello to the ocean. There were more people than I had ever seen as the tide was very low and She was there. People were flocking. She was laying flat, her eyes and head rolling back and forth trying to see all the movement around her. She lay still, crying aloud if a dog came too close. I thought that she might be hurt as soon as I saw her. We approached slowly, far behind her, Michael taking the dogs further on. Oddly, the beach cleared. We watched as all the people walked back to the opposite end and disappeared except for a random couple who were taking in the scene as we were. Why was everyone suddenly leaving? I slowly approached her where she could easily see me, keeping my distance so I didn't scare her. I introduced myself and she lifted up. I'm pretty sure my jaw dropped open at this point. Absolutely beautiful. Majestic. I crouched with her, snapping a couple photos but mostly just being with her. I cannot really explain what happened next as it seemed like I dropped into a journey instantly. Everything slowed. She talked and then I did and she did again. I wanted to soothe her. I don't remember what I said. She lay back down, watching me. I remember that the Wind picked up and it blew so hard I felt lifted to my feet, my arms riding up and out above my head. I swayed to the ocean waves as she too rose up again. We stared at one another-the wind whipping my hair into my face. I dropped back into a crouch and waited. Many long moments passed. Suddenly, the water came rushing in and I stumbled towards the beach to avoid sinking. She looked at me one last time and entered the water, calling out as she hit the spot where only her head was visible, looking back at me. I bowed. What else was there to do! Magic had just happened. It was a moment encapsulated in the elements. Incredible! #cydneyfrench #oregon #ocean #oceanstory #sealion #sea #animal #mammal #connect (at Hwy 101 Oregon Coast)

[cydneyfrench]

...And the thinning of the veils can be felt far and wide. With prayers cast forward, we sing into the ether to connect once again to those who have left before us. ...The end of a spiritual year and beginning of a new one. We welcome in the coldest half of the year and say goodby to summer drawing up the end of the harvest season. Tis ALL HALLOW'S EVE, SAMHAIN, HALLOWEEN plus a new moon in Scorpio just arrived! Enjoy all the spooky, decorative, exciting bits and ghoulish souls of this celebration! #cydneyfrench #oregon #fromthitown #halloween #samhain #newmoon #scorpio #veil #LIFT #spiritdriven #prayer #fire #mask #drum #sing #portland #spooky #fun #play #ghoul #spirit #womensweekend #connect #harvest #end

[cydneyfrench]

there wil come a time, before long, that all this tipi energy will come to bare fruit in my yard. #cydneyfrench #tipi #oregon #oregonexplored #beach #ocean #water #photography #landscape #nature #liveauthentic #LIFT #medicine #aho #shamanlife #pnw #pnwonderland #sing #drum #prayer #fire

[cydneyfrench]

It's the little things that count. #cydneyfrench #oregon #oregonexplored #tree #adventure #explorer #liveauthentic #pnw #pnwonderland #LIFT #pnwoutdoorwomen #nature #photography #liveauthentic (at Hood River)

[cydneyfrench]

Summer day longing. #cydneyfrench #oregon #oregonexplored #pnw #pnwonderland #pnwoutdoorwomen #water #creek #river #nature #landscape #photography #explorer #adventure #mthood #remember #summer (at Mt Hood National Forest)

[cydneyfrench]

crow dreams #cydneyfrench #oregon #pnwexplored #art #photography #painting #light #crow #water #beach #river #nature #spirit #crow #bird #skull #LIFT #dream #halloween (at Portland, Oregon)

[cydneyfrench]

who am I to say what's real?! #cydneyfrench #oregon #oregonexplored #pnw #pnwoutdoorwomen #pnwonderland #danger #pause #humor #atthegate #reality #bites #explore #velociraptor #adventure #riverlife #river #geteaten #getoutside #bestoforegon #halloween (at Hood River)

[cydneyfrench]

glorious day on the river. #cydneyfrench #oregon #oregonexplored #pnwoutdoorwomen #hoodriver #liveauthentic #landscape #photography #art #river #water #flow #spiritdriven #pnw #bestoforegon #hoodriver (at Hood River)

[cydneyfrench]

Water as.... #cydneyfrench #metaphor #Oregon #river #water #PNW #explore #adventure #emotion #pnwoutdoorwomen #seek #processwork #spiritdriven #pnwonderland #sojourner #LIFT #liveauthentic #photography #landscape #hoodriver (at Hood River)

[cydneyfrench]

no shortage of color this time of year. subtle richness. #cydneyfrench #oregon #pnw #getoutside #explore #nature #mushroom #autumn #artist #macro #landscape #earth #liveauthentic #hoodriver #pnwoutdoorwomen (at Hood River)

[cydneyfrench]

Mullein leaf, also known as velvet leaf. Medicinal plant for the lungs. #cydneyfrench #oregon #native #plant #mullein #leaf #lungs #medicinal #explore #adventure #velvet #macro #landscape #artist #photography #artist (at Hood River)

[cydneyfrench]

water as metaphor ~~~ #cydneyfrench #oregon #river #water #emotion #pnwoutdoorwomen #art #spiritdriven #LIFT #pnwonderland #pnw #explore #adventure #liveauthentic #hoodriver #seek #sojourner #photography #artist #landscape #pnwexplorations (at Hood River)