buckbisexually

[buckbisexually]

eddie being the only constant, the one person who has always been there and now he is leaving buck too. oh god it’s going to hit buck so hard, and just reinforce in his bpd brain that everybody leaves. please baby let me give you a hug

[buckbisexually]

i think some people do not seem to grasp that FEELING abandoned doesn't always mean you ARE being abandoned. like. and buck actually is capable of recognising this. which is why he's like. I WILL HELP EDDIE DO THIS I WILL BE THAT FOR HIM. because rationally part of him does know that it's not about him. because it's not. BUT. knowing this doesn't make it hurt less. doesn't make the abandonment feel any less real. it's such a hard thing to explain i am realising as i type this. because like. two things feel true at once. two opposing things. 1) i feel like i am being abandoned and left and that this is about ME and once again proves i am not good enough and 2) but i KNOW this is not about me and this isn't about them leaving me so why do i still feel like this. and it's a really fucking frustrating warring duo of feelings that often feel impossible to reconcile. because the KNOWING doesn't cancel out the FEELING. it just makes you feel stupid and terrible for feeling like that. and that's on abandonment issues i guess. phew.

[buckbisexually]

we are overdue for another buck near death storyline honestly. get to it abc!

[buckbisexually]

EVAN BUCKLEY in 9-1-1 8.08 - Wannabes

[buckbisexually]

[Buck was quick to volunteer to help him find a place, but he’s got to be devastated. Take us into his head.]

Tim Minear: Oh, I think there are fire alarms going off in his head right now. You can see it in Oliver’s performance, too. As soon as Eddie turns his back, Buck looks like he’s been hit in the head with a baseball bat, and that will figure in mightily when we come back.

[buckbisexually]

#which could mean nothing

9-1-1 | Season 8, Episode 8, ‘Wannabes’

[buckbisexually]

evan buckley seriously character of all time. first question he asks eddie is if the houses will fit in his budget. second questions he answers himself as a bat smashes through his heart 329832389 miles per hour is if eddie needs help.

[buckbisexually]

9-1-1 3x05: Rage

[buckbisexually]

Eddie’s breakdown to Bobby gives us an even deeper understanding of why he blew up at Buck in the middle of the grocery store. Eddie’s so used to being strong, his go-to emotion when he’s hurting is anger. He wasn’t just missing him- it was much more than that. By filing the lawsuit that kept them apart, Buck [unknowingly] made Eddie feel like he was all alone again, and had further fractured Eddie’s already broken heart.

But here’s the thing: Eddie has himself so convinced he wasn’t enough for Shannon- that’s he’s not enough for anyone- he can’t see (or is choosing not to see) what’s right in front of him. Buck, doing anything and everything for his forgiveness. Buck, who noticed right away something was wrong with him when no one else had. Buck, who loves his kid like his own. He’s Christopher’s Buck, but he’s Eddie’s Buck too.

[buckbisexually]

Ep 8.08 Post Mortem Interviews about Buck & Eddie

[buckbisexually]

buck used his key, came in with a gift basket of baked goods, offered to make eddie snickerdoodles, thought eddie was watching porn, pointed out eddie was wearing a fancy little button down, said they can look for homes in el paso TOGETHER ON THE COUCH, then was hit in the head with the realization that his best friend might be leaving him. literally what the fuck ever

[buckbisexually]

got dumped/chris is still in texas/eddie wants to MOVE to texas/maddie is getting kidnapped by a serial killer: come march 6th buck buckley is going to spontaneously combust

[buckbisexually]

and if buck moves into the diaz house while eddie and chris are away in texas as he waits for them to come back like he did for abby. what then.

[buckbisexually]

buck’s face the two separate times he realizes that he’s losing a diaz boy to the state of texas.

[buckbisexually]

WHY IS HE SUCH A FLIRT

[buckbisexually]

evan buck buckley character of all time. he loves big romantic gestures but is bad at relationships. he doesn’t know movies that came out before he was born. he met a man and basically adopted his child within a month. he has ADHD. he loves his job so much he was willing to sue about it. he spent hundreds of dollars on a coffee maker just to fuck with his best friend. he hates basketball but hates eddie making basketball friends without him even more. he died and came back. he owns a kitchenaid stand mixer. and of course. he’s even bisexual

[buckbisexually]

#*as loud as you can* your new girl ex is my clone.