boysofhyrule
BoysofHyrule
77 posts
I make fun Zelda incorrect quotes/stores /AU involving rare pairs and comedy. If you have any questions about any of them please feel free to ask!
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boysofhyrule · 14 days ago
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Groose: I want to wake up with you every day for the rest of our lives.
Impa: I wake up at 4:30 AM every day to train.
Groose: I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives.
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boysofhyrule · 18 days ago
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Gerudo yoga pt2
Urbosa: It’s quite
Guard 1: Isn’t that a good-
Guard 2: WAIT SISTER DONT SAY-
Urbosa: Too quite.
Both guards cover their ears and wait for something to happen, after a few moments they look around and see nothing happened
Urbosa: What are you two doing?
Both guards: NOTHING!
Urbosa slumps back into her thrown and rest her chin on her hand board
Urbosa: Where is that Voe? It’s not like him to go this long with out doing something!
Guard 1: Chief who are you talking about?
Guard 2: Oh OH does our sister have a Voe that has captured her eye?
Guard 1: Maybe it’s one of those knights from hyrule that travel with the princess and her bodyguard!
Guard 2: Or or one of those merchants that vist the oasis! Or or-
Urbosa: Let me remind you I am your chief and will reassign you to clean the Sand seal stalls
Both Guards: Sorry Chief
Urbosa to herself: but where is he?
-meanwhile in the deep dark layer of the Yiga cave-
Master Kohga: oh-ho! Oh! My back! Ah! I threw out my back!
Outside the master room Yiga foot solders look between each other in worry till one goes and knocks on the door
Yiga 2: Master are you ok?
Master Kohga opens the door shacking trying to stand
Kohga: Yep! Never better, why do you ask?
Yiga 2: well we heard noises from your chamber and were worried so-
Kohga:Never better!
Yiga 1: but-
Kohga: I.Said.Never.better.
-A few hours later the group of Yiga stand around a campfire talking-
Yiga 1: I’m really worried about master
Yiga 2: me to, he hasn’t left his chamber all week!
Yiga 47: The kids want to see master kohga and give him some get well soon drawings
Yiga 1: aww that’s sweet, how are they doing?
Yiga 47: oh amazingly! Lori just learned how to..
The three Yiga wouldn’t hear the figure approaching until she was standing behind 47 mincingly 
Yiga 47: ..and then we just had to eat the banana salad… why are you guys looking at me like that? Do I have something on my mask?
Urbosa: where is he?
Yiga 47: oh what in Hylias left ti-
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boysofhyrule · 18 days ago
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Twilight : I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine.
Midna: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.
Twilight : O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns??
Midna: Is it working?
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boysofhyrule · 1 month ago
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Randall The Hyrule soldier AU: New Captain
Impa: RANDALL FRONT AND CENTER!
Randall: YES SIR! 🫡
Randall runs to meet General Impa and a Hyrule Captain
Randall: you call sir
Impa: Yes, I would like to introduce you to your new captain.
???: Morning Lad, I have heard you are my go to guy for handling the fish lady
Randall cringing: yes that would be me captain-
Captain: -Captain Knyte!
The new caption shakes Randall’s hand and Randall thinks for a moment
Randall: nice to meet you Captain knight
Captain Knyte: It’s Knyte
Randall: night?
Captain Knyte: No, it’s pronounced Cnight lad
Randall:Captain Nite?
Captain Knyte: No it’s Knyte
Impa: I believe I understand the confusion, you prefer to go by your rank of Knight?
Captain Knyte: No that’s my first name Cnitee
Randall: wait so your first name is knight
Captain knyte: no it’s Cnitee with a silent second E
Randall: so it’s Cnitee
Captain Knyte: yes
Impa: your rank is a hyrule Knight?
Captain Knyte: Correct General
Randall: and your surname is Knyte?
Captain Knyte: That is right lad
Randall: so your full title is Hyrule Knight Cnitee Knyte?
Captain Knyte: There you go lad, you got it now!
Randall looks at Impa
Randall: Knight Cnitee Knyte
The General looks back at Randall
Impa: Captain Knight Cnitee Knyte
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boysofhyrule · 1 month ago
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boysofhyrule · 2 months ago
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Gerudo yoga pt1
The Yiga and Gerudo were in the middle of a battle with the two leaders of each squaring off
Kohga: It seems today I have the upper hand! It’s only natural for your arch-nemesis to be the one to finally defeat you!
Urbosa: For the last time you are not my arch nemesis you stupid Voe!
Truth be told Urbosa was worried, The Yiga did indeed have the upper hand in this fight with a sudden surprise attack
Konga: sure sure, whatever you say but with this next attack I will defeat you!
Master Konga summons one of his signature spike balls above his head until a loud pop and the Yiga leader goes rigidly stiff and the spike ball vanishes
Konga: oh no
The battle stops and everyone looks at the two leaders
Urbosa: *whispering* what are you doing?
Konga: *whispering* I think I threw out my back
Yiga blade master: Boss you ok?
Konga: YES OF COURSE MY LOYAL *he tries to turn to the blade master but let’s a low painful scream through clenched teeth*
Yiga blade master: Boss are you injured?!!
Konga: No No Not at all…but I think we have shown the Gerudo the strength of the Yiga today so we will let them flee
Konga teeters back to look at Urbosa with a almost pleading look on his mask
Konga: Isn’t that right Lady Urbosa?
Stifling a small laugh urbosa rests her weight onto her hip
Urbosa: oh no I believe we can still battle
Konga: No need to keep face you can flee with your pride!
Urbosa: No No I insist we continue
Konga:…
Urbosa:…
Konga: Fine!
Master Konga very slowly shifts into another fighting stance often stopping and breathing heavily
Urbosa: Your not serious are you?
Konga: y-ye -ow yes I am
Urbosa: you really are stupid *sigh* Gerudo we are moving out
Konga: *whisper* Thank you
Urbosa just shacks her head as the convoy leaves
Yiga blade master: We won boss! All thanks to your leadership!
The blade master then slaps Konga on the back in congratulations
Konga: AHHHH-
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boysofhyrule · 2 months ago
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tfw your husband’s older brother is a 13 year old
anyway, just a “malon meets the chain” mini comic but adding the hyrule warriors time shenanigans lol
I already explained it in this post, but I really love the hc that wars+time+wind all went through HW pre linked universe, cause the older brother now turned younger brother dynamic between wind+wars and time is HILARIOUS to me lol
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boysofhyrule · 3 months ago
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Nicknames pt. Final
Purah: you know what I’m going to ask right
Link sips tea nodding
Purah: and then your just going to deny it like the other two
Link shakes head no
Purah: Wait what? So you do have pet names for each other
Link nods
Purah: Then why did they deny it???
Link shrugs
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boysofhyrule · 3 months ago
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Groose AU: Hair
Impa wait impatiently outside the bathroom tapping her foot
Impa: Groose can you hurry up? What’s taking so long??
Groose: Just give me 10 more minutes
Impa: WHAT? How? What is taking you so long that you need to spend an hour in the bathroom?
Groose: My hair
Impa: by the goddess that’s absurd! How can your stupid hair take so long?
Groose opens the door and half his hair was dripping down and covering his left eye
Groose: First off don’t insult the hair. second, you can’t rush perfection
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boysofhyrule · 3 months ago
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Randall The Hyrule soldier AU: WHAT?
Ruto: Randall!
Randall: what?
Ruto: Randall!!!
Randall: what??
Ruto:Randall!!!!!
Randall: WHAT???
Ruto:…
Randall:…
*cricket sounds*
Ruto:RANDALL!!!
Randall: WHAT????????
Ruto: would you love me if I was a worm?
Randall:…
Ruto:…
Randall: no
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boysofhyrule · 3 months ago
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A Yiga’s advice
On the balcony of the gerudo chiefs palace Urbosa looks over gerudo town as the night life swirls around
Urbosa: Peaceful as it should be
???: Yeah despite the lack of bananas
Urbosa quickly turns around aiming her Scimitar at the neck of the intruder
kohga: woah! woah! woah! It’s just me!
Urbosa: That’s so much worse then any assassin! HOW DID YOU EVEN GET PAST THE GUARDS AND DEFENSES?
Kohga: First off, harsh. Second, there are literally no doors I basically walked in
Urbosa: For the love of the seven sisters! why are you here?
Kohga: I don’t know I was bored…
Urbosa: so you sunk into my palace to what?
Kohga: hang out? Talk? I’m new at this
Urbosa: …
Kohga: …
Urbosa: you are unbelievable, You do realize that we are enemies right?
Kohga: and?
Urbosa: and enemies don’t chat like a group of young Vai!
Kohga: ok look during our battle today you seemed off and as your arch nemesis-
Urbosa: you are not my arch nemesis
Kohga: -AS YOUR ARCH NEMESIS I wanted to check up on you, so what’s up?
Urbosa looks at the Yiga through the mask and sighs, lowering her scimitar and sits next to him
Urbosa: It’s about the princess…
She would talk to her arch nemesis for the next few hours till early sunrise
Urbosa: I just don’t know what to do, I have taken the role as her mother figure but I’m unable to treat her as I would if I had my own Vehvi! She keeps getting into trouble and with the calamity on its way…
She sighs resting her head in her hands
Kohga: Then don’t. Kids are rebellious regardless of what you do, she going to act out in defiance and do what she believes is right
Urbosa: what do you know about kids?
Kohga: Do you forget I’m the leader of the Yiga? I’m constantly around little banana eaters either babysitting for their parents or taking in strays.
Urbosa: strays?
Kohga: Little ones left without homes for one reason or another
Kohga: Anyways look, kids especially teens need their space every now and then to grow on their own, but as long as you are there for them when they need it. than that’s all that matters in the end.
Urbosa: Sa’oten, I’m surprised that’s actually really insightful, hard to imagine something like that coming from you
Kohga stands up and leans back to pop his back
Kohga: Weeeell what do you expect from the leader of the feared Yiga? *yawn* I better be going, I’ll see you and don’t expect me to go easy on you next time in battle
With a blast of smoke he is gone, but due to the sound two guards run into the room
Guard 1: Lady urbosa are you alright?
Urbosa: I’m alright sister, I’m.. just contemplating the future is all
With that she looks back of the horizon of the desert
Guard 2: madam that doesn’t explain the small explos-
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boysofhyrule · 4 months ago
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boysofhyrule · 4 months ago
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Banana sake over the sand
On a overlook of the Gerudo desert Master kohga sits alone drinking a bottle of sake watching the festive lights of Gerudo town
Kohga: One day I’ll *hic* one day I’ll be *hic* Uggh
???: One day you will what?
Kohga: ehh?? Oh it’s just you
Urbosa:I believe I asked you a question
Kohga: Yeah yeah *hic* man I really need to lay off the banana sake *hic* can’t let people just sneak up on me
Urbosa stands waiting for a response
Kohga: Don’t just stand there! Sit sit *hic* join me for a drink, one Chief to another!
Urbosa: Why in Hylia would I-
Kohga: Sit, you won today I’m to sore and bruised to do anything
Urbosa sits down next to the banana man 
Urbosa: If your not planning anything then why are you out here?
Kohga: Is it a crime to enjoy a succulent bottle of Banana sake?
Urbosa: Those two things should never belong together
Kohga: Just shuddup and try it
He shoves the bottle into her hand and after a tentative sniff she takes a sip and coughs
Urbosa: That’s vile! How do you drink such things?
Kohga: Lack of choice? Making due with what we have? Up to you
He takes the bottle back
Urbosa: If this is all a ploy to-
Kohga: Do you think under different circumstances we would have been friends?
Urbosa: Ok how hard did I hit you today with my lightning?
Kohga: Oh pretty hard but I gained feeling in my toes hours ago
Urbosa turns to look up at the moon
Urbosa: In another life maybe, your a fierce warrior despite what others think, you care for your people and I respect that maybe in that other life we could have been-
Kohga: *Loudly snores*
Urbosa smiles softly looking down at the man
Urbosa: But nothing to say that can’t change in this life

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boysofhyrule · 4 months ago
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Randall the Hyrule soldier AU: Glair
Midna:…
Ruto:…
Both are glaring at each other
Lana: what are they doing?
Hyrule captain:well Ruto is mad at Midna because of how she defended a keep
Lana: what did she do run out of enemy’s to throw so she threw are troops?
Hyrule captain:…
Lana: Wait-no���she wouldn’t…I mean if someone especially annoyed her
Randall rolls in on a wheel chair
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boysofhyrule · 5 months ago
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LINEBECK THE II AU: it’s not what it looks like
Linebeck II: ugh my head
Linebeck would feel around and find that he is laying on something cool and squishy
Lana: I wouldn’t do that
Linebeck II: why no-
Cia kicks down the door followed by Link
Cia: Lana stop what you are doing!
Lana: I’m not doing anything!
Linebeck II was laying in a chu-chu water bed
Lana: I can explain
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boysofhyrule · 5 months ago
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Paya AOC AU: Are They Happy?
Mipha: “Lady Paya do you have a moment”
Paya internally: “oh no no no please no”
Paya: “yes, what is it lady Mipha?”
Mipha: “Are…are they happy in the future?”
Paya: “I’m sorry? I’m afraid I don’t understand”
Mipha: “Link and Zelda, Sidon told me about the three of you”
Paya: “Lady Mipha I’m sor-
Mipha: “No no it’s alright, I’m not mad, I understand they are different people to who I know and love”
Mipha sits and offers the seat next to her for paya, which she takes
Mipha: “I understand that they are not the Link and Zelda I know. so I’m curious, are they happy”
Paya: “yes”
Mipha: “Thank you”
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boysofhyrule · 5 months ago
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THE GROOSE AU: Portal arc PT 9
Skyward Sword Impa slowly waking up in a tent and sees Groose sitting in a chair next to her
Impa: Groose?
Groose: Impa! Your awake, how are you feeling?
Impa: Sore, and I had the wildest dream it’s actually funny
Groose: oh? What was the dream about?
Impa: you step through a random portal and Dave and me followed after you, we then ended up in the sea and happened upon a annoying sailer named linebeck or something we then went through another portal we’re we fell through the sky and landed…
Groose:…
Impa: Groose it wasn’t a dream was it
Groose: on the bright side-
Impa: Run while I’m still dizzy
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Just a reminder that I changed some things about this AU the
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