almostsomewheremaybe

[almostsomewheremaybe]

you hate me you made me

[almostsomewheremaybe]

Alfonsina Storni, tr. by Dorothy Scott Loos, from Selected Poems; "My Ghosts,"

[almostsomewheremaybe]

My type: the unreachable ghosts of my past

[almostsomewheremaybe]

Certain sins can be redeemed. Others scar lifetimes. Like making a girl cry. Breaking a heart that beats still. A crime that follows the ages. Until your name is Judas Mud and Brutus Arnold and can only mean treachery.

[almostsomewheremaybe]

My body is a brutal thing.

[almostsomewheremaybe]

Endless Stairs

When I was a child, I played Super Mario 64. Inside the mushroom castle, there’s a red carpeted staircase that leads to the last level. Each side of the stairs mocks you with portraits of sworn enemies and stolen lovers. You can see the final victory, right there from the beginning, but the stairs are endless. A trick. You could sprint up forever and never reach the top. As soon as you stop, you just turn around, and it’s like you barely went anywhere. I fear that’s what I’ve made of myself. I’m an endless stack of failed steps that lead nowhere. Mislead by a mirage happy ending, I exhaust those who dare to climb my steps. Once it’s over, they’re left feeling like I wasn’t real and didn’t matter. I hate that that’s how they feel and I hate that that’s how I’ve been.

[almostsomewheremaybe]

we would not defy gravity

we would define it

a force pulling

two objects together

across space time

a force, together

[almostsomewheremaybe]

Your only job is not to hide anymore.

[almostsomewheremaybe]

Ruined flesh, rejoice.

Scars: a celebration of

defeat's transience.

[almostsomewheremaybe]

two hands never let me go one long, one short forever turning against me

but your hands two worlds all palm and psalm I imagine it’s kinder, calm to be held by you

[almostsomewheremaybe]

when you were mine (and everyone else’s) the pain felt special is that what Hell is?

[almostsomewheremaybe]

“liked your post” how bout you like me instead

[almostsomewheremaybe]

I feel ya

I pray to God you don’t

[almostsomewheremaybe]

my vibes have never been worse apparently lol

[almostsomewheremaybe]

she has a perfect hand. Wrapped in skin as flawless as heavens cloud. each finger, a loving feather, on angel wing. She has a perfect hand. It won’t change a tire or chisel a stone. It will, in unbreakable grasp, hold every inch of my world.

[almostsomewheremaybe]

Kenneth Koch, Straits

[almostsomewheremaybe]

here she is