xsapphic-celestialx

[xsapphic-celestialx]

saw @nataliepleasecallme asking for squishy soapy pics on @f4ggydog post so here is a collection I compiled (with a bonus squishy Ellie in the second one)

I want to tuck her into bed and feed her soup and protect her from freaks who care way too much about her lip and whether or not she’s had buccal fat removal (free my girl from the accusations)

god forbid a mewing queen gets in a scooter accident and has to have surgery on her mouth that leaves a scar because her teeth got knocked out

[xsapphic-celestialx]

“(also the httyd books did what people think the h*rry p*tter books did but that’s an opinion I don’t think people are ready for)”

Hey. Psst hey. I'm ready for this opinion and I know others are too. Please share it with us I love it when the HTTYD book series is appreciated!!!

ok so when I wrote that I had actually given it zero thought I just knew it in my bones to be true el oh el

I also haven’t read the books in years so my memory is very rusty

but now I have given it a few thoughts so here are some of the things I think httyd does better:

building the prophecy into the story from the beginning. The seadragonus giganticus maximus knew hiccups name in the first book. Fishlegs’ lobster claw necklace is mentioned in the second book. As opposed to “oh btw there are these things you have to destroy, here are some random ass objects that have never been mentioned”

the lore and world building. With Harry Potter it really felt like details were added in as the author decided the plot needed them, with httyd we are fed information about the world the characters are living in naturally. Also Cressida Cowell wrote an extra book on the ins and outs of dragonese and types of dragons and I think that’s cool

THE SLAVE PLOTLINE. IN HTTYD THE PEOPLE WITH THE SLAVEMARK DO NOT WANT TO BE SLAVES. THERE IS NO PLOTLINE WHERE FISHLEGS TRIES TO FREE THEM AND HICCUP AND CAMICAZE THINK HE’S WEIRD AND EVERYONE ELSE IS LIKE “ACTUALLY WE ENJOY BEING OPPRESSED” AND THEN ITS NEVER ADDRESSED AGAIN

Hiccup actually makes an effort to learn dragonese as opposed to just being able to speak it innately

the names. Who the FUCK is Bellatrix Lestrange, my girl Valhallarama of the White Arms and Chunky Thighs solos that bitch

the author isn’t a raging transphobe. Cressida advocates for libraries in every school and for mature language in children’s books so they develop a better vocabulary from a young age

Hiccup doesn’t become a cop at the end of the series

and just in general I think how to train your dragon was a much more creative exploration of a boy navigating his way through political upset in a magical world

anyway that was explained atrociously and I’m sure there’s more I missed so if anyone has anything else to add please do, and thank you anon for letting me ramble

[xsapphic-celestialx]

“*blank* is for the girls and the gays!”

No they’re not. If a person says they’re for the girls and the gays there’s a 90% chance they mean feminine straight women and white gay men. If I put a fat hairy butch lesbian with he/him pronouns in front of Sabrina Carpenter she’d run away screaming.

(fat hairy butch lesbians with he/him pronouns i love you guys i would lay down my life for you….truly the backbone of the community)

[xsapphic-celestialx]

The how to train your dragon movies are so fundamentally different from the book series and yet I really don’t mind because they’re both incredible in their own ways, but a part of me will forever mourn the loss of sassy little green toothless

(also the httyd books did what people think the h*rry p*tter books did but that’s an opinion I don’t think people are ready for)

[xsapphic-celestialx]

OKAAAAY now can we talk about how lottie wasn't the one to fucking start the hunts but they've managed (mainly misty) to convince her it all came from her?? I FEEL SICKKKK witnessing it in this rewatch. this worsened her mental condition SO MUCH even more so because it seems everyone but tai and shauna, when rescue came, put on their masks and was set on pretending they were sane the whole time there. meanwhile lottie's in a fucking mental hospital for YEARS. for them to suggest in the adult timeline she should be institutionalized AGAIN because she wanted another hunt. something they told her would be for the best. something she explicitly said she NEVER wanted. how they all kept saying HOW MUCH they needed her. and here's photo evidence bc those episodes are truly making me feel so bad for her CHARLOTTE MATTHEWSSSSS

LIKE???? FOR FUCK'S SAKE THE ONE THAT SUGGESTS THEY SACRIFICE ONE OF THEM OUT LOUD FIRST IS TAI. BEFORE SHE HAS THE GUTS TO BE THE ONE TO SAY IT OUT LOUD NAT AND TRAVIS ARE WALKING TOWARDS THAT CONCLUSION. SHE ALSO TELLS LOTTIE IS SOMEONE THEY CAN'T LOSE. IF SHE WAS HAVING DELUSIONS EVERYBODY WAS SUPPORTING IT. AND WORSENING IT. SHE LITERALLY VOLUNTEERED HERSELF TO BE BEATEN UP AND THEN TALKED ABOUT GIVING >>>HERSELF<<< AS SACRIFICE BECAUSE SHE IS SO MENTALLY FUCKED UP AND SUICIDAL AS IT BECOMES EVIDENT WHEN SHES SAD SHE DIDNT DRAW THE QUEEN CARD IN MARI'S HUNT. OH GOD I FEEL SICKKKKKK NO ONE EVER DARE TALKING SHIT ABOUT LOTTIE MATTHEWS TO ME LIKE YEAH SHE DID CREATE A CULT AS AN ADULT BUT CAN YOU BLAME HER FOR WANTING THAT FEELING OF BEING NEEDED SO DEEPLY BACK???? WHEN SHE DIDNT HAVE IT EVER????????

[xsapphic-celestialx]

How sick and twisted would it be if when the Yellowjackets inevitably gets rescued in s4, there's a shot when the rescue plane (because of course it's going to be a plane) takes off, flies up above the trees — and through one of the girls' windows (probably Van's), you see a highway or road snaking through the landscape, or maybe lights of a park campsite — just close enough they could have reached it, if It would have let them. Back to Van, her lip trembling; behind her, Tai setting her jaw. Or maybe they're not even sitting next to each other at this point. Cut to Shauna with her rbf, slamming her window cover shut (her luggage is on the seat next to her. Jackie's dress is visible at the top of the bag/pile). Cut to Lottie with a sad thousand-yard stare out the window, not looking at the lights but back at the woods. One of the shots is strategically framed to put emphasis on all the empty seats. Episode ends.

Would that be fucked up or what?

[xsapphic-celestialx]

Natalies character asks the question: if you feel guilt does that make you a better person over someone who doesn’t? And my answer to that is yes!! I love you Natalie scatorccio they could never make me hate you

[xsapphic-celestialx]

this is the issue with the man's best friend album cover. sabrina has a history of sexualizing herself in the theme of being a little girl. here she is pictured in a photoshoot inspired by a novel about a 12 year old girl who's mother is murdered by a pedophile and then abducted by him and raped. but she used this movie adaptation as inspiration for a sexy photoshoot.

"im full grown but i look like a little girl come put something big in my little box"

"i'll take you somewhere that has no hair" we've been discussing how hairless women comes from pedophilia culture.

the issue with sabrina is not that she is sexualizing herself. it's how she's creating this power imbalance with men. and being walked like a dog on a collar, titling your album "man's best friend" only harms us. it aids to the growing culture of men overpowering women.

choice feminism is NOT real feminism. arguing that a woman should be allowed to sexualize little girls is wrong. arguing that a woman should be allowed to degrade herself at the foot of a man is wrong.

[xsapphic-celestialx]

every time i complain about being single and having no hoes i want everybody to remember that i intentionally and strategically sabotage any opportunity i have to open myself up to a romantic or sexual connection because i’m a pussy and an idiot

[xsapphic-celestialx]

FIRST step to enjoying any media is getting attached to the character whose suicidal tendencies are the most obvious

[xsapphic-celestialx]

Rip jackienat you would've loved Taylor Swift and Hayley Williams friendship

[xsapphic-celestialx]

propaganda i AM falling for

-lottienat

-multi shipping

-travis/javi/coach ben defending

-empathizing with shauna shipman NOT defending her

[xsapphic-celestialx]

This isn't going to make sense to anyone but me but jackienat is like lesbian stonathan

[xsapphic-celestialx]

Jackie Taylor queen of “ok but girls are just OBJECTIVELY more attractive than boys and everyone knows it, no I’m not gay Van but I WISH I was, then I could marry Shauna”

(Tai Van Nat and Lottie can all be seen banging their heads on a wall)

theory that jackie lowkey sucks at soccer bc she gets so distracted at practice by the other girls like damn sorry shauna's ass is popping sorry nat is literally bending over right in front of her while she stretches sorry what is she supposed to do not let lottie tackle her sorry van bit her lip while jackie was trying to score ofc it went wide sorry for being a human being with eyes ig???

[xsapphic-celestialx]

Shauna Shipman is so incredibly tongues and teeth by the crane wives

the entire song applies to her but especially the lines “abandon all your stupid dreams about the girl I could have been” and “I’ve grown a mouth so sharp and cruel it’s all that I can give to you”

[xsapphic-celestialx]

I absolutely adore this but have we considered; the only reason Jackie’s good at soccer is because she’s so deep in comphet she doesn’t realise she’s attracted to girls 😭 imagine an au where Jackie’s the best player on the team and then she realises she’s a lesbian and suddenly her abilities significantly decrease because her eyes have been opened to the fact that everyone else on the team is fine af. Like she’s running down the field distracted looking at lotties legs and a ball that she should’ve headed just smacks her in the face and the rest of the girls are like “damn wtf is up with Jackie is she sick or something?”

rip Jackie Taylor you would’ve had a field day with good luck babe

theory that jackie lowkey sucks at soccer bc she gets so distracted at practice by the other girls like damn sorry shauna's ass is popping sorry nat is literally bending over right in front of her while she stretches sorry what is she supposed to do not let lottie tackle her sorry van bit her lip while jackie was trying to score ofc it went wide sorry for being a human being with eyes ig???

[xsapphic-celestialx]

the way these few lines say so much about their dynamic

asking the question we already know the answer to

"why didnt you say something?"

and the way jackie says it and looks at her, i think its proof that shauna knew jackies true intentions, as this is just shaunas dream (although it could be some supernatural stuff if you believe its real)

jackie feels bad she called shauna a name she apparently always hated. something she didnt know because shauna never told her until it just came out.

and shauna doesnt answer jackies question at all, just shrugs and looks at her. to me it reads like "because you shouldve known" and then her realizing that that makes no sense, "but how would she have known if i didnt tell her?"

then she pushes down the thought because it cant be shaunas fault, its jackies, jeffs, the worlds fault. never shaunas.