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wendynoire · 5 months ago

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A Divine Surprise

"This is the place for redemption, right?" A blonde sinner, having many toad-like traits, with 2 swords crossed on her back. Both were infused with angelic steel, but it seemed the colours were important to her due to the dual of the blades - one was angelic steel and a pale cyan, the other angelic steel and a rusty pink.

"Yes!" Charlie practically fell over herself as she raced towards the door which opened wider to reveal another sinner was there too. "I can explain how everything works while showing you around, you're going to love it here!"

The other sinner's head looked like they were wearing a black helmet with horns that looked like axolotl gills, 3 red eyes that looked like they were rotated versions of the others. Otherwise she looked like she belonged in an RPG adventurer game with her patchwork armour and skirt.

"You'll need to leave your swords behind to stay here." Vaggie's trust was stretched thin with the mish mash of sinners they already had at the hotel, especially with an Overlord, the last thing she needed was a murder happy sinner with not one, but 2 angelic weapons.

"Why? You have an angelic spear." The blonde sinner raised an eyebrow. "Besides, I only really use these when it's an extermination- Marcy, you're on fire."

"What- HOW!?" The other sinner's cloak was, indeed, in flames as she shrugged it off, flapping it around until the flames went out. "Sasha! Don't laugh!"

"Sorry, Marmar, but seriously? We've been in hell for 3 years now, and you still can't walk down the street without something going wrong." Sasha pressed a kiss on the part of Marcy's face that didn't look like a helmet. "I'm not going to use my swords on anyone here, and they're kinda important to me."

"How d'ya use them for the extermination?" Angel had wandered over to the newcomers quickly, with his long, spindly limbs.

"Stab exorcists." Sasha shrugged, though it was Marcy's turn to laugh at her under the breath complaint about how much taller than her Angel was, used to being the tallest. "They stop moving, so I assume it kills them."

"How'd you-"

"Jesus fucking Christ!" Husk's voice made Sasha jump, grabbing and shielding Marcy by putting herself between the source of the voice and Marcy. "Andrias!?"

"... My name is Husker." The cat bartender just blinked in surprise at the response to his voice. "The fuck is 'Andrias'?"

"A psychopathic piece of shit with the same voice as you." Sasha didn't quite look fully convinced that the cat wasn't the person she was talking about, her grip on Marcy still tight.

"He wasn't that bad."

Sasha slowly turned to face Marcy, her head tilted to the side.

"Marmar... He stabbed you through the chest, threw Sprig out of a window, got you possessed by the Core, acted as a dictator, and tried to take over and destroy Earth." Sasha spoke slowly like she was talking to a child.

"You also tried to be a dictator though." Marcy pointed out.

"And that's why I'm in hell." Sasha seemed satisfied that Husk wasn't Andrias due to his lack of input at her insults towards the giant newt as she turned back to Charlie, moving her hand down from Marcy's shoulder to her hand. "Anyway, sorry, you were talking about a tour?"

"Right! Yes!" Charlie smiled again as Vaggie, with her spear, joined the tour. "I have a meeting with heaven in about a month to get them to agree to help with the redemption plan! If you can tell us more about what happened to the 2 of you when you were alive it might help with redemption."

"There were 3 of us." Marcy peered around as she walked, relying on Sasha to lead her as she always used to in school.

"Anne ended up in heaven though. If she didn't I would sue heaven." Sasha followed Charlie as she told them which rooms were occupied and by who.

"I don't think you can sue heaven." Vaggie raised an eyebrow at Sasha.

"I don't give a shit." The toad shrugged. "I'm fucking doing it anyway."

-----

Needless to say, Charlie's meeting with heaven didn't go well.

The extermination was aimed almost entirely at the hotel, but thanks to Sasha's accidental discovery, they were able to arm themselves. The two members of the calamity trio in hell were prepared for a fight, and while they no longer had access to the powers of the crystals, they still had the experiences of fighting the core... Even if it had taken Anne's disintegration and reformation to get rid of it once and for all.

At least Sasha wouldn't have to fight Darcy this time - unable to seriously hurt her opponent who hid in Marcy's body.

"Here they come." Vaggie steeled her resolve when they all saw the portal open, Charlie taking a deep, calming breath. "Get ready everyone! We fight together!"

Sasha raised both her swords, Marcy aiming her crossbow with angelic steel arrow heads at the portal, everyone ready for the angels to come.

"Now! For your souls!" Vaggie raised her spear, the crowd of sinners and hellborn cheering as the exorcists came through the portal.

But before the exorcists were in anyone's range, the sound of a storm deafened them. Dark clouds none of them had seen since they entered hell forming above the hotel, even the exorcists holding still as they could sense the overwhelming power that this storm held.

"No!" Charlie looked desperate as tears formed in her eyes, seeming to realise what was going on as a ball of barely blue tinted light appearing.

There was simply no way any of the sinners could fight this thing, Marcy thought it was a reasonable assessment to assume that even Lucifer would come short if he was forced to face the overwhelming power. From the divine power that seemed to pour out of the being of light as if it were a waterfall, it also seemed likely for it to take the side of the exorcists.

"It was nice loving you, Marmar." Sasha didn't have a hand left to take hold of Marcy, offering a smile instead.

"I wouldn't give up our time together for anything." Marcy returned the smile.

Even knowing this fight was futile, they were going to keep their stand until they were dead. If they gave up easily then they didn't deserve to be members of the calamity trio.

"What are you doing?" The almost human shaped ball of light spoke with a voice that sounded like a chorus of millions, but something about it made the breath catch in Sasha and Marcy's throats. "I had already banned these practices."

"But they killed some of us!" Adam flew to the front of the exorcists, the sinners unable to do anything but watch, but his arguing showed a sign of hope.

"And you have killed millions of them." The echoing voice sounded like it was siding with hell. "And you would have lost none if you had done as you were told. Go back, exterminations are done."

"But-"

"Go. Back." The voice cut off whatever argument Adam was trying to raise, their tone final. "Don't let me catch you doing this again."

Adam and the rest of the exorcists couldn't argue with the divine being in their way, so they turned tail and ran before anything could happen to the hotel.

That didn't mean the danger had passed for the hotel, though. The exorcists were gone, but heaven had denied Charlie's attempts to work together. A divine being like this would surely be on the same side as heaven despite the disagreement with the exterminations.

But the ball of light didn't attack, instead changing form and becoming much, much dimmer.

It kept changing until it took the form of a woman with dark skin, and tightly curled hair with a lot of volume, tied back in a way that made it look like a pompom.

It was a woman so familiar it almost hurt.

"Anne!?"

Sasha and Marcy hadn't been trying to speak in unison, but their voices built off each other, almost sounding like the ball of light as they echoed in the now empty space. The woman clearly heard them, looking down in surprise despite the quiet frustration she had been showing.

"Sasha!" The woman's face lit up as she flew down to the sinners standing outside of the hotel. "Mar- Whyyyy do you look like that?"

Upon getting a good look at Marcy the woman who still gave off a strong divine aura hid behind Sasha, clearly freaked out.

"Yeah, it's really unsettling, but she's got no connections to the core any more. Just looks quite like Darcy." Sasha took one of Anne's hands, her swords forgotten on the ground in the presence of her old friend.

"Do you mind if I change it?" Anne was still using Sasha as a shield, the drone that the V's had been using to spy on the battle crashing to the ground glitching. "I can make you look like a newt?"

"That's fine, but Anne, what just happened?" Marcy took Anne's other hand as her form shifted, looking more like the friends she had made in Amphibia.

"Oh... I'm God now." Anne shrugged as though it was no big deal. "Why are you two in hell?"

"No, no no no, you're fucking what?" Sasha pulled away from Anne to face the woman, relieved to see her in better health than the last time they had spoken, but a finger in her face nonetheless.

"I'm God." Anne tilted her head to the side, confused. "Didn't I tell you that?"

"No, no you did not." Marcy, now looking remarkably like Andrias with her newt features and strongly blue tinted skin. "How long did you know you were going to be god without telling us!?"

"You remember when I died after absorbing the power of all the stones and defeating the Core?" Anne adjusted herself so she was sitting, floating just above the ground, the blue glow still there, the cannibals leaving as the food they were promised wasn't going to happen, the other residents of the hotel not sure if this new god would even let them talk.

"Yes... That was traumatising... You literally turned into leaves." Sasha spoke slowly, as though she was thinking Anne was being stupid.

"Well I met the previous God. Turns out the stones were a test, and I was the first person to pass the test. They offered to have me become God, I tried to reject it, but they just created the identical copy of my body for me to come back to life and made me become god the next time I died." Anne shrugged, clearly having had a long time to understand her situation. "Why are you two in hell?"

"Anne," Sasha lay a hand on the God's shoulder. "I tried to become a dictator of Amphibia. I also almost killed the Planters."

"And I'm the reason we got stuck in Amphibia in the first place, leading to Frogvasion." Marcy raised the hand that wasn't holding Anne's.

"Sasha... You were a therapist." Anne raised an eyebrow at the two sinners. "And Marcy, you paid for that with what happened with Darcy, and you were a comic writer. You've both done enough good to be redeemed."

"Wait, you're for redemption?" Charlie interrupted, Anne looking like she had forgotten there was anyone else nearby.

"Well... Yeah... I mean, it's already happened a few times." Anne wasn't omniscient, at least not yet with how many different universes she now had to take care of, but she knew that much. "One of the first was your brother." Anne pointed at Vaggie.

"My what?" Vaggie's voice was more aggressive than she meant with her shock.

"Yeah, Daniel.... You are Victoria, right?" Anne was starting to feel a little insecure, perhaps she had confused this angel with someone else, but she didn't think so. There weren't many fallen exorcists.

Vaggie didn't say anything else, looking horrified.

"I feel like I said something I shouldn't have, and I have a lot to do. The previous God kinda just fucked off, so I have no idea what I'm doing." Anne squeezed Sasha and Marcy's hands with a smile. "You two, get to heaven, I'll be seeing you.. Oh! The guy who ran you both off the road got arrested and I'm cursing him randomly when I'm bored."

"Serves him fuckin' right!" Sasha grinned an evil grin. "The guy's been stalking my patient and her family with insane rambling as a justification."

"Ehhhhh... He's not entirely wrong; Vee is a basilisk so technically a type of demon." Anne shrugged.

"So you two are friends with God?" Husk raised an eyebrow at the two sinners, Anne immediately reforming.

"What the fuck!?" Anne did the same as Sasha when she had first heard the cat's voice, placing herself between her friends and the bartender.

"That's Husker, he's got nothing to do with Andrias." Sasha put her hand on Anne's shoulder again.

"Then why does he sound like him?" Anne's voice was high pitched as she looked back.

"Shouldn't you know that?" Marcy laughed.

"I don't know shit!" Anne argued. "I'm a frog scientist!"

"You're the best frog scientist." Marcy grinned.

"Bullshit." Anne tinted her head back so she was looking down her nose at Marcy.

"Didn't you say you had shit to do?" Sasha laughed. "Go on, you know where to find us when you have time."

"Fine, but you both need to get to heaven." Anne sighed, giving them both hugs before she disappeared like she had come.

"What did I miss?" Lucifer was out of breath as he arrived, a little concerned now he couldn't see any signs of an extermination.

"Those two are friends with God." Angel pointed at Sasha and Marcy.

"Exterminations are cancelled." Nifty sounded disappointed as she said that.

"I have a brother who is a redeemed sinner and my name is actually Victoria." Victoria still looked shellshocked as Charlie tried to comfort her.

"The new God agrees with redemption and it's already happened." Charlie added.

"... What?"

-----

"Took you two fucking long enough." Anne greeted the remaining two thirds of the calamity trio as they appeared in a grand hall where not just Anne, but other angels who looked to be powerful. "This guy's a bitch, wanna be my new Metatron angels?"

"Be your what?" Sasha looked around, glad she had been redeemed with Marcy, but surprised at the same time.

"Metatron is the highest angel." Marcy explained. "But why us?"

"Because I can trust you two." Anne shrugged. "Will you?"

"If you retire, we get to as well." Sasha grinned, accepting Anne's offer.

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