Hey there it's Lex, I shitpost! | They/them please! | Main is @purplexiasphinx | I'm trying to post at least once a day thanks to my queue | Asks and submissions are always open unless I say they aren't | Unless stated otherwise my posts come from a lovely incorrect quote generator that you can find in the source of my older posts.
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Rita: I'm a nice person mista Steel, but I'm about to start throwing rocks.
#rita tpp#rita [redacted]#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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Ruby 7: *a series of whistles varying in tone and pitch*
Juno: What Ruby said- get in, loser. We're committing vehicular manslaughter.
#juno steel#ruby 7#is this in season 4 idk I haven't been mentally prepared to listen to it yet#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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Vespa: Now, the recipe calls for 2 shots of vodka.
Vespa: *upends the bottle*
#'it's for buddy' she says. emptying another bottle.#vespa ilkay#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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Juno: My favorite outdoor activity is going back inside.
#juno steel#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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Mick: Valentine's day? I'm ready. *sprays an entire can of AXE body spray on himself*
#mick mercury#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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Juno: So, according to my university, it is, quote, “my responsibility if there is an internet outage to contact the faculty and the department.”
Juno: Now, if you’re a critical thinker like me, you might be wondering one thing.
Juno: HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO EMAIL THE DEPARTMENT?!?!?!
#juno steel#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#was really torn between him and Sasha but I could ACTIVELY hear him saying that in his voice#swearing#oOP POSTED IT
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Juno: Hey, Wire. You know any birds?
Sasha: ???????
#regina spektor#two birds#I hit 'make post'#I forget what I'm going to say#two birds starts playing#idea#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue#juno steel#sasha wire
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Buddy: Yesterday, I overheard Juno saying "Are you sure this is a good idea?" and Rita replying "Trust me" and I have never moved from one room to another so fast in my life
#buddy aurinko#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue#ME? Posting? unbelievable#it's only been two weeks but I have ADHD so that's basically twice as long for me
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Rita: laying on the floor listening to Mitski’s Strawberry Blond on loop isn’t a healthy way to deal with your feelings for Nureyev, y’know
Juno: shush, I almost had the vibe
#submission#source: the-glorious-half-pints-twin#you are incredible I love you#rita tpp#rita [redacted]#juno steel#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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Juno: You know what? Fuck this, I deserve nice things.
Juno: *picks up Rita*
Juno: I'm taking this as emotional compensation.
#juno steel#rita tpp#rita [redacted]#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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Rita: Hey mista Ransom, what's your star sign?
Nureyev: My what?
Rita: Your star sign. Like when you were born?
Nureyev: That's a bit personal, Rita...
Rita: Ohhhh don't worry mista Ransom! I'm not gonna hurt you or nothin, but I could prolly find it if I tried hard enough...
Nureyev: That- won't be necessary, Rita.
Rita: Great! I'm gettin' the feelin' you don't know, so why don'tcha tell me your birthday and we can find out!
Nureyev: I see... well, I suppose- don't tell anyone this, though. Alright?
Rita: My lips are sealed!
Later...
Rita: Mission Get Mista Ransom's Birthday was a success!
#she was in fact put up to this by juno#who was unintentionally put up to this by Buddy who was just idly like 'do you know what Ransom's birthday is?'#'seems you two are rather close#you might want to do something if it's soon. we are doing a lot of thieving... you could get him a present on the next stop.'#of course Buddy knew Nureyev's birthday was coming up soon because she just asked Rita to find it at some point and Rita was like Sure#but JUNO didn't know#and Rita wanted to see if she could actually talk Ransom into giving up his birthday.#of course WHO says no to Rita#no one#so the mission was a success :)#peter nureyev#rita tpp#rita [redacted]#juno steel#he isn't present but he's There#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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Vespa: Hey, Steel. What the hell was that?
Juno: What the hell was what?
Vespa: You nearly got us all killed in there!
Juno: In where???
Vespa: The kitchen! I don't trust anybody in there, especially not you.
Juno: You... you know I can cook, right?
Vespa: Yeah, real convincing Steel.
Juno: I made dinner last night!
#juno steel#vespa ilkay#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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no post today only technoblade plushie made to look like juno steel
#I WOULD make a post#but I cannot think#only technoplush#genuinely there was a time I thought I would never enjoy these creators and yet HERE WE ARE#not tpp#not a quote#technoblade#HIS MERCH DROPPED TODAY AND I'M HYPED OK#hehe... big pilow...#tomorrow I will make a real post#lex speaking
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Rita: I don't get it mista Steel, how come they get to break the law but not us?
Juno: Because they're on the other side of the law, Rita.
Rita: That doesn't seem very fair.
#ok rita probably knows#but also uhhhhh I forgot to queue a post for today and this was all I could think of#juno steel#rita tpp#rita [redacted]#police tw#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes
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Vespa: Ay, Ransom. What're you doing?
Nureyev: Oh, this? Well, I'm working on a-
Vespa: I just realized I don't really care. But if I catch you being suspicious and I'll shoot you in the foot.
Nureyev, under his breath: what...?
#peter nureyev#vespa ilkay#tw violence#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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Nureyev: Rita, have you ever considered using your, ah... talents, for making a bit of extra cred? Now, I know it isn't the most legal thing in the galaxy but neither is what we're doing here.
Rita:
Rita:
Rita: I'm not sure what you're askin' me mista Ransom but I don't know if I like it.
Nureyev: ????
#nureyev: hey what if you committed fraud 😎 wouldn't that be super fun and sexy#rita: are you????? suggesting???? what are you suggesting???? what crimes are you bringing upon my doorstep????#credit card fraud is not a hobby sir and rita probably has like. a lot of random accounts she could drain if she needed money#she still deserves a raise but I think she has cash#oops I'm headcanoning in the tags again#rita tpp#rita [redacted]#peter nureyev#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue
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Juno: Hey, big guy, what are your pronouns?
Jet: What's that?
Juno: Indicative but not exclusive to your gender identity.
Jet: Stop swearing at me.
Juno:
Juno, to Buddy: Buddy, what are Jet's pronouns?
Buddy: Oh, he doesn't really mind, but we use he/him.
#listen the idea popped into my head and now I can ONLY think of Jet 'what's a pronoun' siquliak#I don't CARE if it's unrealistic I WILL share my headcanons in dumb meme format#juno steel#jet siquliak#the penumbra podcast#incorrect tpp#tpp#tpp incorrect quotes#incorrect juno steel quotes#incorrect quotes#when trouble arises i simply queue#source: I actually have no idea I originally saw it in a mcyt shitpost I think???? but I have seen it all over
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