thetablestspoon

[thetablestspoon]

[thetablestspoon]

the priest at my church trying to convert me into christianity after he learned that i like shen jiu: you know who else hung out with prostitutes?

[thetablestspoon]

Interesting how the cultivation world sees Shen Qingqiu as the victim in his relationship with Luo Binghe and his martial siblings are like "just say the word and we'll get you out", meanwhile Shang Qinghua is like naw, those two are freak4freak and y'all are just blinded by your rose tinted vision of Shen Qingqiu

Shang Qinghua: I once told Cucumber-Bro that he'll never fuck my heterosexual fictional protagonist, and he somehow proved me wrong

[thetablestspoon]

i struggle with vampire hua cheng aus sometimes because whenever he needs to drink blood this image keeps coming to mind.

crimson rain my ass

[thetablestspoon]

based off this text post lul :]

[thetablestspoon]

you think youre so funny and cool huh. well you are. i love you

[thetablestspoon]

[thetablestspoon]

Assigned Bat At Birth

i stepped on the scale today and it said “bat”

it took me a few seconds to realize it meant the battery was out, but before i realized that i just said “i am not a bat” out loud

[thetablestspoon]

>two parts oatmeal one part milk

that shit goes down smooth as silk

>two parts oatmeal one part rice

kinda weird but could be nice

>two parts oatmeal one part stew

now it's getting hard to chew

>two parts oatmeal one part mole

um no thanks i'm really full

>two parts oatmeal one part mouse

what the fuck dude leave my house

>two parts oatmeal one part arm

where'd that come from who'd you harm

>two parts oatmeal one part ned

who is that oh god he's dead

>two parts oatmeal one part gourd

oh fuck yeah i'm back onboard!

[thetablestspoon]

[thetablestspoon]

can they get a room

[thetablestspoon]

the girl ever

[thetablestspoon]

"please advise" is the professional email equivalent of "girl help"

[thetablestspoon]

honestly i think im good without that thanks

[thetablestspoon]

compilation of some totally normal behavior

[thetablestspoon]

yess

[thetablestspoon]

Thieves Guild