finnish rock trash. mä tykkään petteri salmisesta. 18/04
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Happy birthday bro!! 💖
Im so late BUT THANK U!!
How are u?<3
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Well ill just try to forget him in a romantic way (not gonna be easy but i know i can love him platonically and more than anything just fear losing him as a friend) and go back to my hopeless love towards this classmate. I had feelings for him such a long time and i dont think they ever fully disappeared even tho i rly love this boy i was with
Never wouldve guessed this day comes but ive boy problems for real
#ive accepted that sometimes this happens no matter how much other still loves#i know i will hurt so so bad for weeks but im also sure that the love will morph into something platonic#i just hope i got new best friend out of this#and the cute classmate. well. i know ill never be completely over him anyway so it is whatever to go back liking him as a coping mechanism#AND i get something to do and think and he is lovely person so why wouldnt i still like him#now i just have two hopeless crushes on stupid metalheads#idk i sure do have a type#and hey tmi but at least i lost my virginity to a great guy i can proudly say had me first!!
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He left me. He feels that he likes me more as a friend and i get it. But why did he let me fall in love and then left me and broke me? He still wants to see me and be close friends and i do too, we match as people in any way. I just thought i finally got to be happy and someone liked me and then it changes in a few days
Never wouldve guessed this day comes but ive boy problems for real
#he said he PROBABLY wont change his mind but this came so fast and after we didnt really see for a while that i think he might think again#i know it is stupid to hope that but fr. maybe he still wants me back some day#it just doesnt feel real or fair that first he wanted to be with me and then just left me#im not even mad at him. we still care about each other but his feelings just arent romantic i guess#he didnt even hug me for two days otherwise than in his sleep/half asleep. means nothing but is he really sure about this??#if he fucking hangs on me when he sleeps but doesnt even touch when awakw#idk#im just so endlessly sad because i thought i deserved happiness and then it just ended#i will always love him. and theres this stupid hope thay he changes his mind#i just hate myself for trusting someone and letting them in like this just to be left#it is not even his fault really. he made me happier than ever for these maybw two months. i just hope it couldve lasted a little longer#but still. what if he takes me back? what if he realises that he likes me anyways and wants to try again?? it means nothing but do you#really show that kind lf affection to person you dont like in your sleep?#of*#it was so stupid to imagine someone could love me. i wish he never wanted to be with me. now im the one left feeling like this#and he wants to still watch movies w me and hang out and stuff. i hope he at least lets me hug him as a friend#thw fact is that we get along as friends too. as people. if i believed in soulmates (platonic or other) he would be mine#im sorry im just so very broken rn#i will never be happy again
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Im an adult now
Turning 18 in two days and what the fuck
#jk ill be a child next ten years. child with a permission to drink and drive (not at the same time)
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hugely underdiscussed variable in the summer-lover versus summer-hater debate is region.
reblog this and put in the tags: where you live, which season you prefer, and why
#finland#and i prefer autumn or winter. maybe autumn more#i like the dark and calm and hate allergies so theres that#also all my problems get worse the closer summer comes idk why#and i hate hot weather (anything over 20-25c is too much for me) and refuse to wear t shirts which makes me die#anyways colder seasons all the way#especially autumn since it is not freezing but chilly in a nice way
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Honestly my petteri salminen obsession is still very much present and idk what to think
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Turning 18 in two days and what the fuck
#tbh im not even celebrating#my bf is sick rn (nothing too serious) so ill either be with him or all alone and drink#my social skills and needs are at all time low
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When boys stretch and their clothing rides up n u can see their tummy and you
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Hey!!
Can someone edit dave grohl as "dave gorl", that gru meme?
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it escalated and now ive a boyfriend
Never wouldve guessed this day comes but ive boy problems for real
#he knows i still have a crush on this classmate and knows that those feelings wont just disappear#more casual thing but i really really like him tbh#and i cant keep liking one person who doesnt even like me back for the rest of my life#anyways#idk why im telling#but this is fine at least right now#it is just so hard to believe someone likes me#weird#very odd indeed#perkele
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Never wouldve guessed this day comes but ive boy problems for real
#so theres still this cute guy im classmates/friends with who ive liked forever. i still like him a lot. way too much. not going away.#and now theres this another dude who probably likes me. im pretty sure. we hang out a lot and he held me yesterday and we#lowkey kissed and stuff and i really like to spend time with him#also he knows i have massive crush on this classmate and said that it is okay and good that i told him early on#now i really dont know whats between us two. id love to like him and i do but the feelings towards this classmate are not going anywhere#i guess im not being unfair to him because i clearly told everything. i still feel bad that i cant 100% like him/stop liking someone else#i wish i was the kind of a person who gets crushes all the time#but this classmate is my only real irl crush ever and now i have warm-ish feelings towards the new friend too but thats not helping at all#i wish i could just NOT BE IN THIS SITUATION#hsjfjsf sorry#rant over#hi
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Okay no one cares
#but someone might remember the cute guy in my class who i dont like but maybe like a little bit#well im not sure but i think we are friends now#at least we hang out with same people and can talk to each other. so if not friends then friends friends#im like 99% sure they do not have tumblr so it is pretty safe to talk about them#but this one time we were having a few beers at friends place he INSISTED i use his phone charger and wont get up to get mine if it fits#he almost fucking physically stopped me from going. but his charger fit fine so thats nice.#the thing is that he wouldve needed it for his half broken vape (...giving a great impression here) but still just had to give it#it was kinda cute tbh. he is less quiet outside of the school (and while drunk) but so am i#he also sings very nicely. and likes so many of my fav bands. and plays well many instruments. im jealous and also so very chrushing on him#and he is my exact type when it comes to looks too which is just a plus thing!! he has the prettiest smile and eyes and nice hands and#he is perfectly soft and idc about height but also tall!! i love his stretch marks and pathetic tiny moustache and he has amazing hair#but his smile. it actually HURTS when he smiles at me and i hate it because what the fuck.#there is like one person ive ever liked this much before (...hey) and im not sure if i like this since he doesnt like me back#IDK WHY I TOLD IM JUST BORED AND TRYING TO BE ACTIVE AGAIN AND VERY 👁👁 AT HIM#and his stupid jokes and cute laugh and at least the personality he lets people see at school (and occasionally otherwise) and music taste#idk if this is weird but i really like his hips and stomach lol. and also arms and hands. IM SORRY NO ONE CARES#i just felt like talking about something happy even if no one sees#sorryyyy byeee
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guys what day of the week were you born on? i was born on a tuesday
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In sorry i pretty much disappeared
#ive been so tired all the time#and maybe have not been so well#like everything is fine and stuff#im just tired#it is likely that i start depression meds and i hope they fit#i dont even think im depressed or anything. i dont feel sad almost at all but i guess professionals know the best#i had to do some tests#also friends keep pressuring me to bring up add/autism to the psychology person i go to but idk#i honestly dont think i qualify for those#i just happen to be like this. most likely with no real reason#i guess itd be a waste of time#also ill probably stop going to the psychology person at least if i get the meds because talking seems to do nothing#idk what theres to do tho because im okay#it is difficult to fix something that is not even real#but anyways im really sorry ive been away and stuff and idk if that will change because im still very tired#but i wanted to explain anyways#also getting a cat soon!!#moms friend has a cat that has babies every now and then and one needed a home.#and my money situation is good enough since rent stayed the same and i have basically free meal five days a week#and i rarely cook anything anyways so i dont need that much for myself#sorry long post#and tw weight stuff here#but im so happy that ive lost about five or six kg now. just a little tiny bit to go. i feel a lot better at least some days than before#okay bye
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…it is still 7:34am 😂
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Im up at 4am to "fix my sleeping schedule" but tomorrows class is gonna be hell with no sleep at all
#i just got home#we have online class because the teacher is sick but it doesnt make it one bit easier when my ablility to focus on online class is zero#even when well rested#so no sleep is terrible idea#but i dont want to live on 3-5h of sleep#so gotta do what students gotta do i guess#no i couldnt fix it on holiday
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