theloveandhorrorhere

[theloveandhorrorhere]

Sméagol

Those bright black eyes

Looked up at me with such wonder

Those little hands in mine

The way you held onto my wrist

As I picked you up

Your tail so bushy

As you scurried around on my lap

You hid your face

In the crook of my elbow

And burrowed under my Hawaiian shirt

You clung to my back

And I felt the warmth of your body against mine

You must’ve felt so safe

In your little cave

In between my shirts

Because you visited it often

If I had known the last time I had held you

Would be the last time I ever held you

I never would’ve put you down again.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

Indigo

In deepest gloom,

I finally found you,

Gazing out the windows,

Of your room,

You point,

Asking me to look past the Darkness,

Do I see it out there,

Do I see the Light just ahead,

Blazing purple for all to see,

Lighting up the blackness-

All I've seen for months now.

I want to say yes,

I do see it,

The indigo light in the sky,

So bright I can see the stars again,

But all I see is cast in heinous shadows,

Filtered through the despair I feel outside,

And covered in blood,

I tell you "yes" anyways,

I do see your light,

And you smile, delighted.

I do not know if what you see,

Is a figment of your imaginings,

Or if you're able to look past the blackness,

And see something I'll never be able to;

A Light at the End of the World,

So little is well Outside,

And I hope for your sake,

That purple Light is real.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

The Fair City or Ode to Pompeii

Death is in the skies,

Floating in the air,

Ashes coat my lungs,

And I wonder if this shall be my last breath,

I would close my eyes,

But I know it won't lessen the pain.

The reaper's calling,

My city's falling,

And I know we're going to die tonight,

Not by some blight,

But by Vulcan's fiery wrath,

I see my life pass by my eyes, and I see death at the end of the path.

I watch my city,

My dear Pompeii, falling down,

Nothing can be done.

Magma courses down the roads,

Puddles of it in ferocious droves,

People run and people hide,

But nothing can be done,

And I know we're going to die tonight.

I should have known it was too good to last,

A city so grand as Pompeii,

I should have known I was going to see it fall one day.

The end has come to pass,

The fair city has been destroyed,

And I knew we were going to die going to die tonight.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

Fabric

It fell from the tear in the sky,

Inky, shimmering black,

Soft to the touch,

Like velvet;

The fabric of the world in my palm.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

The Patriarchs

And those great beings of old, those titans, those dastardly heroes,

Fell dead to the ground;

Just mortal men after all,

Their secrets and lies going with them to the great beyond,

Not even a proper farewell were they given,

Nor did they give to their children

Perhaps it was deserved,

Perhaps they deserved a sendoff cut short,

By their own shortcomings.

They were just men... they were only ever going to be flawed,

And what we need to remember is that it's dangerous to romanticize people just because they're gone and dead,

We need to remember their imperfections, many as they were,

And keep in mind the fallibility of flesh and matter,

We need to remember what a bad person at least one of them was,

And we are still alive,

We can do better than they ever did.

Echoes from memory; let them trouble us no more,

We step out from the past,

And claim our rightful legacies together,

Or not at all,

Their ways are gone; they are done,

There's no place for men like them in our time,

Let them be forgotten,

Let them rot away from the tapestry of thought,

We are the future.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

Haunted House

It's not my home,

It never was,

This place so plagued with shadows

And shadows of promises

Forcing me to linger and listen

As I wait my turn to leave.

It's not my home

A home is not a place to fear

Being eaten by the walls themselves,

Digested by some ghoulish fiend

Calling itself your safety, your solace

In trying times.

It's not my home

It's not my friend

It's a whisper floating through the mist,

Telling me lies about myself

In vain, in fear I'll leave it behind at last,

So is my dearest wish

To escape its raking claws.

It's not my home

It strips away at my soul, day by day,

Tearing me down until I'm but a whisper of nothing,

A no one compared with its vastness

A single microbe compared with the cosmos;

It's not my home

But it may become my coffin.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

The Nightly Conversation

I'm the shadow outside your window,

I'm the nails scraping against the glass,

I'm the wind whispering,

"Let me in, let me in."

I'm the movement in the corner of your eye,

The strange shape lurking in the dark,

The creaking floorboards just out of sight,

I'm the unseen brush against your ankle,

The haunting laughter in your ear.

I'm the feeling that makes you pause,

Makes you think before flipping the light switch on,

The terror building in your chest,

The frothing drool dripping and glistening on your forehead,

The yellow, yellow eyes peering out from the closet door,

Those are all me.

I am waiting,

Ever watching,

Now pull yourself from under the covers and come find me;

It's not hard, I am everywhere, everything to fear

And I grow restless, young one, for you to join me,

All you need to do is let me in.

It'll only be worse if you wait,

For I have nothing to lose,

Nothing to stop me.

Let me in.

Let me in!

[theloveandhorrorhere]

Our Good Friend, Mothman

Omen of the air

They call him harbinger of fate, of destruction

"Stare too long into those red, red eyes," they say, "and see beyond time itself... if only you dare."

By nature or science, by Earth or space, we know not where he comes from

Be he bird or moth or man, we dare not ask

For fear of his wrath, his haunting roar,

As he perches atop the doomed Bridge

And considers its fate.

In Point Pleasant, he makes his home, his haunt for now,

But where will he go when it's all over,

When the deeds of fate are fulfilled and there is nothing more to warn against

Here in this sleepy town,

Will he return to his forever home or is it simply onto the next disaster?

He is hunted, sought after, his visions demanded by men with suits of deepest black,

But he is more elusive still than these pretenders of flesh;

He flies away into the dark, becoming one with stars and shadow,

You'll never see him unless he wants to be seen.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

The Hardest Path

Writing stories in my head of what could have been

Waking up next to you

Basking in the warmth of your laugh, your smile

Every single day

Telling each other funny stories

Kissing and holding you close

In my arms

Every night

It's not true, but it doesn't feel like a lie

Fairytales only for my aching heart

I loved and I lost and I love and lose it all again

Why must everything feel hollow without you in it

Just a ghost of memory

I love you with all my heart

But you don't love me at all

And so I need to move forward

But forward is such a hard path

To walk alone.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

We Could’ve Been Friends In Another Life

In another world, another universe, maybe you could've been my friend,

We could have run around the yard and played pretend,

But now this game is reaching its end,

And the rift between us is not something I could ever mend

[theloveandhorrorhere]

Heartache

Pain I did not know,

I could feel until now;

A numb beating,

Inside a hollow chest,

A waterfall,

Flowing from dry sockets,

A churning inside a stomach,

That has no will to eat.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

When Will I Get My Answers?

My heart aches for you, but why?

Why you?

Why can't I let go despite everything

Why am I still so in love with you?

What am I supposed to learn from this?

I let someone in after so long, and for what?

For you to turn out like the rest,

  What am I supposed to learn from that?

 I have known for so long not to trust

And this only continues that trend

 So I ask again: what exactly am I meant to learn from this that I haven't already?

Maybe the answer is there isn't one

 Maybe not everything is a lesson sent by the universe

 But a melancholy attached to my soul nonetheless.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

When You Say You Need a Break (From Everyone)

And what can I say to that really?

That I love you (I do)

That I miss you (desperately)

That I need you right now (in my arms)

That the last I felt (truly human) truly alive was with you?

I need you to kiss my face (and run your fingers through my hair)

And tell me everything will okay, (that we'll be okay)

(But I don't know) if you can;

You are not a want, but a need

And I hope and long that you'll come back (to me)

So I can shower you with all the love (and praise) you deserve.

And if I must wait (to hold your hand)

And feel your lips (against mine)

I will wait (as long as I need);

A life without you is no life at all

Not as far as I'm concerned

Not as far as I'm concerned.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

The Lovers Reversed

We were like otters

In the water

Drifting together through the night

And

Holding hands

But you let go

You let go and now we’re drifting apart

Where we can’t find each other again

Our connection broken

Leaving our love behind

Scattered to the ages

Amidst the waves

Crashing, crashing against the rocks

Like so much debris, debris, debris

[theloveandhorrorhere]

A Feast of Flesh and Love

I want to be devoured by you

In the same way I want to devour you,

To bite you, to inhale you, to savor every inch of you

To consume you and become one,

To feel you in my mind, my blood, my bones,

To entangle you in my brain and swim beneath my skin,

To make each other full at last,

We reach and yearn and explore every part in our feast

We are one,

We are one,

And we understand each other body and soul at last;

Drink my blood and eat my body

As I do the same for you

There is something so holy to the way we hold our banquet of flesh

[theloveandhorrorhere]

Only in My Dreams (So Far)

I dreamt about kissing you

Again

So sweet and soft

Held in your embrace

Hidden away from prying eyes

But when I woke

I knew it had never been;

Just a fantasy, a gift from my sleeping mind,

But a gift that left me wanting.

[theloveandhorrorhere]

Crushed

It's been quite awhile, I think--

But my brain feels like it's melting,

Dripping down into my cheeks,

Turning them hot and scarlet,

They must be glowing for all to see,

Like the dying light of the sun, reflected upon my face,

My heart wants to explode out of my chest,

And though my face grows hot,

Cold tendrils work and worm their way up my neck,

Down my arms and shoulders--

And still I think of you.

I wonder if

Your touch would make it better or worse,

Is this sensation meant to last,

Or will it soon pass,

Your voice could be but a whisper of a word,

Yet it would echo in my head like thunder,

I play our conversation back,

And wonder- if this is just banter between friends

Or something more,

In the foggy static of my brain,

I try to unravel the answer, hidden in the mist.

I will do my best to make you laugh and smile

Because when I think of losing you, it's

As though my ribs are crushed and fragmented,

Stabbing, stabbing into my lungs; I cannot breathe

and my eyes throb and sting as though wasps have made their home in them,

I listen to your words across the table and I listen well,

For any day could be the one we say farewell,

I drink it all in with a smile,

Even if this won't be a story our families will tell one day.