theglassishalfsomething - Tumblr blog

theglassishalfsomething · 6 years ago

Text

Darcy Interviews Bing: Romance

1. Do you believe in love at first sight? If so, convince me!

I do believe in it! Proof: a family friend of mine met his wife at a Catholic youth group meeting and told the friend he went with to the gathering as they were leaving that he couldn’t live without her. He just knew. They’ve been married for 30+ years now.

Look- we’ve talked about this. I don’t believe in relationship at first sight- that’s crazy. And I don’t think that the love is fully formed or mature but I think it’s real, I think it’s love, and I think it can happen at first sight (meeting).

I’m not saying it’s the only way people fall in love. It’s not the way a lot of people do and that’s totally fine. I also think it’s something that irresponsible people can use as an excuse for irresponsible behavior and it doesn’t justify anything in terms of recklessness or even foolishness. You still have to get to know someone before you commit to dating them, you shouldn’t be reckless. But what’s in your heart, though fragile, undeveloped, “no proof, not much” IS love. That’s what it IS. It’s not something else!

And in a sense all love is love at first sight. As Christopher Marlowe says, “Who ever loved, that loved not at first sight?” Sometimes it just takes us longer to see it- the first sight happens down the road but it still happens in a moment. I totally get why people love the Darcy/Lizzy love story more than a more conventional love at first sight. I too am probably more moved by “I cannot fix on the hour or the spot or the look or the words that laid the foundation; it is too long ago. I was in the middle before I knew that I’d begun” than “I just knew” but then idk !!! they’re both beautiful!!

I tend to get in fights with people about this and I haven’t yet succeeded in convincing anyone of this and also it doesn’t really matter because I think it’s probably wiser that people don’t go around believing it and being convinced that the cute person you made eye contact with on public transportation is THE ONE and you “just know”. But I just. In my heart of hearts I believe it’s real.

Matt Damon met his wife at a bar okay!!!! Saw her across the room !!!! and KNEW. I didn’t make that up- that happened to him.

2. If you could spend an hour talking about love with one person, living or dead, who would it be?

Well, in truth I’d talk about it with my family and friends but as I already DO that I’m going to go with Taylor Swift and/or (hopefully and) Jane Austen. I think it would be pretty funny if they were both prosaic about it though. Being an artist and being an explainer/rhetorician aren’t the same thing and I love the idea of both of them being not very eloquent about something they’re so GOOD at talking about in other ways. Like the way you once described Megan Whalen Turner and Adam Driver as discussing their work in the same matter-of-fact, understated, unflowery way. (I think about that a lot.)

This question got away from me. I’d still want to talk to Taylor about it though haha.

3. Do you think that “opposites attract” is a more consistently true principle of successful romance, or can two similar people work together?

WHAT A GOOD QUESTION AND ONE ON WHICH I HAVE MUSED MUCH SINCE YOU FIRST POSED IT TO ME

I think in the end it comes back to the idea of balance. (#reylo, #willieverstopbeingthemostannoyingaboutthisNO) Romances, friendships, any kind of relationship works great and beautifully when there are complementary differences that create a natural check and balance between two people. We’ve all got to steady each other out you know. But romance especially calls for those differences in temperament and even outlook where faults as much as virtues help keep the other in check/help push the other to grow. Damon is so sarcastic, Elena is so sincere. She grounds him and cuts through his defenses; he draws her out of her seriousness and out of her head and makes her have a little more fun. Ben is contemplative and thoughtful and questioning, Rey reckless, impulsive, and action-driven. He steadies Rey’s unthinking action, she helps shake him out of his inaction. They’re better together. I could go on.

“Opposites attract” has definitely been overblown because I think having the same fundamental priorities and beliefs and values is most important in a marriage- the most important thing let’s be real- and even in terms of interests and outlook similarities are good. But the edge of difference in personality and approach is good- it’s what creates the spark! It’s what makes it work. Thank God (truly) that we aren’t all the same.

4. What is the greatest lie about romance that is widely accepted?

That romantic love can be separated from morality, from charity, and thrive. It can’t. As Lewis says in The Four Loves, “The rebellious slogan 'All for love' is really love's death warrant (date of execution, for the moment, left blank).”

On a (somewhat loosely) connected note, that’s why I side-eye those romances that start out and then continue against the wishes and support of family, friends, a wider community. I don’t want to overstate it! Parents, friends, community can be close-minded, unfair, hateful, wrong etc. FOR SURE. But marriages that start out against everyone else in their circle with no intention or desire for reconciliation, with just the two people involved feeling that “this is us against the world, we can defeat all odds!” are not a good idea. A couple’s reasons for cutting ties and starting out in isolation may be necessary but should never be undertaken lightly or as a matter of course because we all need support. We need each other.

“We’re In Love And Anyone Who Says We Cannot Do Whatever We Want Because Of That Hates True Love” feels like a default attitude in today’s culture, especially for teenagers, whenever any objections are raised. Objections should be raised. Sit DOWN and be willing to work your way through them and prove that you’ve thought about them and are ready for the risks and the work involved to make this the best thing it can possibly be. Stop being stupid!!! Your love is not the answer to everything!!!!! Your love cannot be your sole guide!!!!

But I mean, true love that wants the true good can. But that’s different from passion, emotion and it’s not what everyone is operating from you know? We’re messy and human.

5. What do you dream of for your own romantic future, if you do?

Judging by these answers, it seems that I think it’s far too big a risk!!

But I mean, dreaming. Hmm. wow this is making me feel very shy. (Can I lower my font size so it’s like I’m whispering.) I want.............I don’t know. Alright, apart from someone who agreed with me on what was most fundamentally important- faith especially obviously- I’d want to love and be loved very deeply. I want all the things we talk about- friendship, trust, someone who helps me grow, someone who challenges me, someone who loves me a lot whom I loved as much in return. It’s- yeah. This isn’t a good answer but it’s such a hard question.

6. Is I love you the most romantic thing that can be said, or are there other words you would choose?

you know I think “I love you” IS the most romantic thing !!! !!! Before you asked this I would have thought that I didn’t think that and I do love other verbal ways of expressing love but there is something about the words themselves that get to me. Whenever I hear it onscreen I kind of tear up a little bit. It’s why I always tend to ship canon couples at least a little bit because it’s like “BUT THEY LOVE EACH OTHER”. You know how I feel about Tyler and Caroline which is not much but there’s that one scene where he writes her a letter and it’s like “I will always love you” and i’m like “SHOOT ME I CAN’T TAKE IT.”

They’re such beautiful words, so straightforward. So ageless. They don’t change! Human beings have been saying them to each other for centuries.

7. How, in this crazy fandom world, do we identify relationships that are ACTUALLY toxic, versus those that are growing/developing/in need of work?

ahem ahem aHEM A relationship isn’t toxic because screenwriters decide to have the characters say it is without backing that up or with writing bad decisions. I’m not bitter I say bitterly with a bitter expression.

Relationships that are built on nothing but bad things- selfishness, control, abuse, lies- are toxic. Relationships that are separated from the pursuit of the good are toxic.

That said, and it’s a big “that said”, we’re all broken, we’re all damaged, we’re all wounded and sinful and I believe that things can get better, that people can heal so a lot of rhetoric around this topic strikes me as wrong. Tumblr especially tends to label conflict, challenge, and imperfections as toxicity and it’s just- no. Those are all parts of a healthy relationship in this fallen world.

Another way of putting it is that I think, in fiction especially, relationships that don’t DEAL with anything, that don’t involve the struggle of communication are not good. Lies and surface-level resolutions aren’t good.

I’m not qualified enough to talk more about it. (I mean it hasn’t stopped me so far but it’s stopping me here.)

8. Is love a choice?

Yes, but you can’t always control how you feel initially. You can always control what you do though, and it’s the doing that’s the most of love. To paraphrase Lewis, the feeling is just the spark that ignited it.

(*sings* “I can’t decide if it’s a choice, getting swept away”)

9. How do you like your romance, in fiction: full of light and sunshine, warm and constant, or tragically resolute?

All of the above. If I had to choose one I’d say “warm and constant” but all of it absolutely kills me. Screams into the void.

10. Tell me what kind of man I should marry.

Someone principled, steady, witty, kind. Also someone who’s a good cook and also who likes dogs so that you know they’re real and have at least one fault in your eyes.

#darcy interviews bing #romance #my answers get progressively shorter #i could ramble forever but it's getting late #amazing questions emma

11 notes · View notes

theglassishalfsomething · 6 years ago

Text

Bing Interviews Darcy: Romance <3

1. You’ve talked before about why you don’t believe young people should date in college. Can you explain that more for us?

STRANGELY ENOUGH, I made a post about this (or very near to this) just today. Basically I believe our culture has shifted and we no longer are equipped, by the time we get to college, to form the kind of serious and stable relationship that has to underpin all the rosiness and joy of romance. I don’t think it’s IMPOSSIBLE, but I also don’t think it’s ADVISABLE to look for love in college. The immaturity, the artificiality of structured interaction, the immense emotional, physical, and financial pressures that too often exist in the modern college setting are all hostile to being in a calm, self-secure state of mind. And I do believe that you have to be READY for relationships, so when I perceive an environment that is not conducive to such readiness, I say...hey. Wait. Be patient. 22 or 23 or 25 is not too old to find love. Far from it! And once you are settled in your life, and responsible for your life, in ways that college is now designed to make impossible, you’ll be in a much healthier position to make life-impacting personal choices.

Now. No doubt anyone reading this OTHER than you, Maria, is very much like “this is dour and out-of-touch af.” And hey, maybe it is! (It’s not. I just spent 8 years in higher ed, thank you very much.) But the point is: a romantic relationship--a TRUE romantic relationship--has an inherent element of separation and isolation in it, in that you and that person are committing to each other in unique ways that cannot be shared communally. And in the barren wasteland of the “college experience,” a lot of young people can’t AFFORD to isolate themselves from what little support system they’ve scrabbled together of friends, a reliable schedule, study buddies, etc. In other words...it’s not a great time to cordon yourself off with another young person who is probably very stressed and at least a little immature.

BUT, you say, I HAVE KNOWN MANY PEOPLE WHO--yes. Yes, I’m sure you have. And I’m sure you will again! But I like to approve of such successes when they ARE successes--and that leaves their reckless impetus in hindsight.

2. What is the most common mistake you believe people make in relationships? Just starting out dating + in a marriage! (A bold question, but I’m excited to hear your answers)

- Insisting that infatuation is love.

- Insisting that your friends/family “get on board” immediately, and also are willing to take second-tier precedence

- Insisting.

3. What’s one thing that is widely considered romantic that you don’t think is romantic? What’s one thing you think is romantic that most people wouldn’t commonly think of as romantic? (this was a mouthful lol)

Using a relationship as a status symbol is gross and any man who tries that with me can find the door himself.

Getting to know someone’s family and friends may seem like a non-sexy, non-romantic task that just goes along with a relationship, but it’s actually SUPER romantic.

4. What IS romance?

I love the broader understanding of the word that infuses it with something fanciful and adventurous and classic. I think that romance is that which should make our souls more beautiful. Transformative love--for our soulmate, for God, for our creative passions.

5. When it comes to romance, is it more important to be prudent or take risks?

Life is full of risk. We must do our best to be prudent. I mean, it’s always both, right? We’re always living through a complication, and we are all the more fortunate AND unfortunate for it. Whenever I advise, I tend to sound a little cold and clinical (I think). But I want to acknowledge here and now that we ALL make decisions, constantly, that may not be wise, or that may not be fair to our future selves. But we have to keep living. We have to keep trying. We have to carry prudence with us through our eternal attempts at self-reflection, even when we’re leaping over chasms.

This is very vague and incoherent. To simplify it and apply it to the context of romantic love, I would say: prudence in pursuing a relationship is another form of kindness towards the person you love. Of course you’re taking a risk by the nature of choosing them--by the nature of choosing anyone. But when you reflect, and try to be sensible, and wise, you are doing it FOR their good. You are developing your own heart and wellbeing for the good of another. And that makes prudence a pretty romantic virtue!

6. What makes for a healthy romantic relationship? An unhealthy one?

Communication, the lack thereof. Justice, and the lack thereof. Humility, charity, passion, and hope--and the lack(s) thereof.

7. What’s the best written romance you’ve ever read?

1. Everything by Jane Austen

2. Mara, Daughter of the Nile by Eloise Jarvis McGraw

3. Queen’s Thief series by Meghan Whalen Turner

4. Waking Rose by Regina Doman

5. The Witch of Blackbird Pond by Elizabeth George Speare

AND...

1. A number of really, really good fanfics (Janus, Out of the Blue, The Politician’s Wife)

8. Why are people so quick to dismiss romance? How would you defend it as a worthy subject in art? (besides your iconic “I won’t be debating this” response)

People mock simplicity--which romance clings to despite all cynicism and ugliness--because they fear it as a complete answer. People fear what clarity would show them, and true love IS clarity.

(I think that answers why it’s also a worthy subject for art.)

9. What’s something our current culture gets wrong about romance?

That sex is the appropriate way to first say I love you, that you can “fix” someone by your love, that uncontrolled anger = passion, that women are the “emotional ones,” that cheating is sometimes inevitable, etc etc etc

10. What makes a couple have good chemistry or is it something that can’t be put into words?

Shared trauma. (Sorry, that’s just my angsty fic-writing heart.)

No, seriously--there has to be a sharing of connection while there’s also a clash of purpose or will or personality. That, at least, is what gets the sparks going for me. I want CONFLICT!

And on that note, I’ll close. :D

#bing interviews darcy #romance #love

21 notes · View notes

theglassishalfsomething · 6 years ago

Text

“True contentment is a thing as active as agriculture. It is the power of getting out of any situation all that there is in it. It is arduous and it is rare.”

— G.K. Chesterton

#BING #omg #quotes

49 notes · View notes

theglassishalfsomething · 6 years ago

Text

Bing Interviews Darcy: reylooooo

1. What made you start shipping reylo? Meaning both what moment in the movies sold you and what fandom occurrence sold you on them?

When I went to see TFA, I wasn’t in my fangirl mode--more that “family fandom” mode, where you just are like WOW COOL MOVIE without being all, HOW CAN I WRITE FIC ABOUT THIS/BLOW UP TUMBLR. So. I definitely was the most...intrigued by Kylo and Rey’s dynamic, thought Kylo was attractive the MOMENT he took his helmet off, and I think I had this inkling in the final battle of ... wowww ... ok...I wonder if anyone else is shipping this. So, for me, I think the moment was “You need a teacher!” Like--BOI. YOU NEED A TEACHER??? THis is a BATTLE.

Wow. This is a very incoherent answer, but my point is, the spark was there. The fandom occurrence was most likely�� you. Your blog really won me over to the idea of them not just as A ship but as THE ship. It wasn’t hard to convince me, because it was so RIGHT.

2. When you think of reylo, is there a color that comes to mind?

Let’s not pretend it’s not the violet wash of red kissing blue, against the chiaroscuro wrath of both their tilted faces. *Rey closes her eyes*

It’s not so much a single color as a color story.

3. Real Talk. Are they a Happily Ever After couple or are they made for angst?

BOTH! But they deserve their sunset and sunrise. The peace and warmth of dying light; the challenge and promise of the next morning’s glow.

4. What do you think each of them give the other, besides love and understanding? What’s something particularly theirs that they give the other that no one else can?

Being the Greatest of Their Kind. Rey is “nobody” and Kylo is a “legacy”--but that doesn’t matter. Mind, heart, and presence--they’re both on a different plane than everyone else. That’s what TLJ shows above all--these two are drawn together and it comes down to them fighting together (back to back) or against each other. Everything else is just stage dressing. (I know that’s a bold statement, but I’m STICKING TO IT.)

5. Where would you rank reylo in terms of your OTPs?

WOW. It’s so hard because I THINK Darcy/Elizabeth has to be #1? But at this point they just might be #2. (FWIW, Darvey, Captain Swan, Gen/Attolia, Sherlolly round out the rest of my Ride-or-Dies). Reylo is so high-ranked because I think it’s in-depth and perfect and well-acted and ACTUALLY CANON and ACTUALLY CENTRAL TO CANON, which are all very important facets. The reason D/E ranks above it is because it’s the ultimate prototype. I mean, I’ve written a book about it lol.

6. There are many interpretations of reylo and each focuses on a different aspect of them. Some reylo shipping focuses on their tension and angst, some on their Softness, some on the fact that they’re equals who can fight and protect each other. Which is your favorite? What’s specifically your reylo?

Tension and angst are my middle names :P. I guess I just really love the softness of two hearts connected against the warring world, even when the the two owners of those hearts think they’re at war too. So it all combines--so many of these questions are only answerable by, IT’S ALL OF IT, THEY’RE ALL OF IT, you know? Because this is pretty much the ultimate OTP.

7. Is there a piece of reylo fan art you especially love?

How about I give you five? (These are just a few examples, there are SO MANY GOOD ONES)

http://rxyl.tumblr.com/post/146038743336/rosa-rosa-rosa-where-is-my-heart

https://reyloship82.tumblr.com/post/173061609805/there-is-no-horizon-for-us-cosmo-gonika-the

http://verauko.tumblr.com/post/136695827545/the-kiss-star-wars-meets-gustav-klimt

http://elithien.tumblr.com/post/169890093857/another-reylo-commission-complete-thank-you ( @elithien is my favorite Reylo artist)

https://theforces-of-destiny.tumblr.com/post/169753827520/ben-solo (this is a manip and I love it)

AND WAIT! ONE MORE! I THINK ABOUT THIS ALL THE TIME!

https://i-am-drowning-in-the-rain.tumblr.com/post/169670396977/belonging-because-there-is-no-such-thing-as-too

8. You love Rey; Ben loves Rey. Do you think you love her for the same reasons?

I think that Ben loves Rey because she represents salvation to him, as well as understanding and a future. However, I think we also love what makes Rey Rey...her innocence, her strength, her optimism, her loyalty, her passion. There’s so much about her that is truly heroic, and she is INSPIRING. I think that both Ben and I appreciate that.

9. Looking back now, does one-sided reylo make any sense at all? Do you still find the idea of it appealing in any way?

Haha. This question. So one-sided Reylo was never really a thing for me because I pretty much refuse to acknowledge the existence of unrequited love? Just in general. I always think people are in love with each other. ESPECIALLY with Reylo. I mean, as soon as I started shipping it I knew that they were drawn TO EACH OTHER. The fact that Ben felt it first/sooner/whatever is just part of the narrative.

I guess that unrequited love can improve a person but in a way it’s something that we have to let go of. I often think that unrequited love is either a beautiful failing--in that a person CAN’T let go of something they should have--or it’s just...not actually love. True love is about the intertwining of souls. If someone else isn’t in love with you it just doesn’t last forever. Or if it does, it’s not exactly the best direction to take your life in, you know? (Not to say that people CAN’T love someone who doesn’t love them back, or that I haven’t enjoyed the tragic heroes or villains who DO love someone unrequitedly, but...yeah. I mostly think it’s Not as Real a Thing as we pretend.)

10. How has reylo inspired you in your own writing?

Well, I’ve written a lot of Reylo fanfic (and YES, I REALLY need to get back to nor are we forgiven!).

I must say, I think Reylo inspires me to explore AUs when I’m really more of a canon person in general. Now, I know you just said you wish there were more canon stories! And I definitely get that. I love canon character studies and canon fill-ins and even canon extensions that try to predict what will happen next. But I think there is a universality to Reylo that lends itself well to AUs, and that makes for an interesting and fulfilling experience as a writer.

It’s also made me enjoy and explore the mythic elements of it. I love fairytales and myths and Reylo feels so close to that model.

#bing interviews darcy #m&e interviews

14 notes · View notes

theglassishalfsomething · 6 years ago

Text

Darcy interviews Bing: Reylo

1. Do you think there’s an argument to not ship Reylo?

Great question!! Yes and no. The best argument I’ve ever heard is from @ihaveonlymydreams (who does ship it btw :))) She pointed out that what they have at their very best, their intimacy with each other, unspoken understanding, and gentleness, is not exclusively a romantic thing. Connection, passion, intense emotion- those belong to other types of relationships too. And so if someone didn’t want to ship it because they saw what they have in a different light rather than romantically, I’d respect that.

But also it doesn’t fully make sense to me because, as we have discussed several times, Ben and Rey are attracted to each other. TLJ leaves no doubt about that; I’d even go so far as to say that TFA doesn’t really either. TLJ explicitly (though also subtly) paints this as a romance. I don’t think that’s up for debate. And it’s just- if you combine all of their similarities and experiences and connection through the force, all of their intimacy and understanding, with the fact that they are both young and beautiful and they’re both aware of this fact, I don’t really see the point of trying to nOT make it a romance. BEcause that’s what romance is!! Right!!!

We’ve talked about this before but I get quite annoyed at the rhetoric around reylo that insists on a platonic read not because it’s your own personal favorite interpretation (valid!!) but as the supposedly “better” or “deeper” reading of their dynamic. Romance IS deep; romance is about a spiritual connection and understanding. Love isn’t shallow!!! And there’s something condescending (or at least it makes me bristle) in the denigration of a romantic view of reylo because “this goes BEYOND shipping”. I’ve seen a few incredibly ridiculous posts about this that completely mocked “the shippers” because “this is a SPIRITUAL/FORCE connection” and all of us SHALLOW PEASANTS were mISSING THE POINT by wanting them to, you know, love each other and get married. And I mean, of course it depends how you’re defining shipping. But romance can and should include big, mystical questions about who both halves of a couple are and what their destiny is and how they can help each other grow as people. Those are the best romances!!!!!!

Plus, we’ve ALSO talked about this, it’s perfectly valid to be like “they’re pretty, i ship it” because THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT PART OF ROMANCE. It doesn’t make you deep to pretend you are above such lofty concerns. None of us are purely intellectual creatures, and it’s delightful and beautiful and important that Ben might not be able to feel the pull of the light as strongly if Rey weren’t standing in front of him in all her wild-rose, youthful beauty, looking at him with those clear eyes, and in the fact that she probably wouldn’t have been QUITE as quick to ship herself straight into enemy territory if he wasn’t 6′3 with the eyes of a Disney prince. BODY AND SOUL Y’ALL.

2. We often see Reylo discussed in terms of the many tropes it fulfills, both romantically and narratively. How do you think that it breaks beyond tropes or what’s expected to be original and fresh?

This question just shot me through the heart. ahhhhhh. AHHHHHHH. This makes me so ???? I’m sorry, I’m just very overwhelmed.

i have two answers. The first is that I think it has something to do with their youthful traumas and the current (again, at their best, etc. etc.) gentleness with which they treat each other because of that. They’re two people who are so deeply wounded and who were wounded SO YOUNG. And their love (and the potential of their romance) is the healing of that loneliness in a way that is so equal between them (it’s not one-sided healing) and so uniquely them.

The second is the fact that they meet at their lowest points in the most hostile of ways and slowly and painfully help each other be better people. I wrote about this in my monster meta on authoritative vs dialogic discourse but (let me just scream about this FOR ONE SECOND), they meet IN A FIGHT, they get to know EACH OTHER IN A FIGHT, and they’re locked together in this intense thing, and slowly, almost in spite of themselves, they help each other grow, they make each other better, it’s this slow upward building thing. So it’s like “love at first sight” meets “relationships take WORK y’all” and honestly I’d say the reason they are currently torn apart from each other- Ben’s terrible moral decisions aside- is that they’ve leaned too heavily on love at first sight and trusted that to carry them over all their differences. Essentially what is unique about them is that they are instant, automatic, completely natural SOULMATES and They Need To Be In Couple’s Therapy Like Yesterday.

Love is easy and it is hard- the reylo story.

3. Who are you more like, Ben or Rey?

AHHHHH. :))) BEN. I relate to his overflow of passion and honestly to the way his heart guides everything. The good, the bad, the stupid, the noble- everything is personal for him. Everything is inspired by wounds or by love. His heart was just MADE to love and the fact that you can still see that?? Even when he’s the villain? I relate to that so much.

I do relate to Rey, though, especially in that we both have the similar problem of everything looking fine on the surface and of being able to lie to others and ourselves about the wounds/flaws we’re hiding. I’m not nearly as bad as her but I can have that tendency to just “put a brave face on it” instead of dealing with a problem. Also I too would try and go save a boy while pretending that that wasn’t what I was doing.

“THIS IS ONLY FOR THE RESISTANCE”

surejan.gif

4. I know that you often describe a balanced dynamic as having one emotionally heavy person and one emotionally light person. Let’s twist the expected: How is Ben the emotionally light one and Rey the emotionally heavy one?

THIS QUESTION MADE ME SHRIEK IN DELIGHT. (I know, they are all doing that.) My best guess is that it has something to do with how they deal with their pain. Ben’s is out in the open; Rey’s is buried so deeply within her. And I could see there being some lightness in him because of that, all of his wild intensity aside- because he’s not a pretender and he’s brutally honest. I think that could really steady Rey and lift her up help her loosen her death grip on her trauma and help her unclench it from her chest and slowly let it go.

5. What should their first kiss be like? Sweet, passionate-on-the-point-of-death, or fiery (in the middle of a fight)?

STOP. I CAN’T EVEN THINK ABOUT THIS. HOW DARE YOU.

I think it should be gentle and hesitant. I know that he was ready to literally sweep her off her feet in the throne room but also I think there is too much fear and newness in this for both of them for it to be anything more dramatic, at least at first.

(i really can’t think about this, why are you making me think about this)

6. Three best Reylo fanfics you’ve ever read?

Janus (ofc)

nor are we forgiven (which brings us back)

miles from where you are

7. What annoys you in fanfic? Conversely, what do you wish you saw more of?

Smut is annoying. So is anything that twists Ben’s character too far one way or another. He is NOT the King of Smooth so anything where he’s just radiating charisma and confidence is wrong, but also the dude has some game. He’s not a totally helpless puppy. It’s a fine line to walk. I get the struggle though, especially when we’re dealing with an AU Ben Solo.

I would love to see more in-canon fics but they are ridiculously perfect for AUs so I get why there are so many.

8. I think it’s a truth universally acknowledged that Reylo is a ship of dreams. But what will Ben and Rey have to fight against? What about each of them will make their relationship difficult even when they finally come together?

So. They both have lots of issues they need to keep working on and there are going to be deep scars that never fully heal but thinking about them in terms of their fairytale setting and NOT applying a real world psychologist/therapist’s view here, I’d say it would be not disappearing into their own little world. They’ve been looking for each other their whole lives I think the danger could be both of them making the other their world entire. They’ve been so desperately lonely for so long and I could see them both just being like “goodbye we only need each other” and obviously that’s a bad idea.

This is a cop-out answer- it’s like saying your weakness is that you work too hard :P so I will say that I do think they’d clash fairly frequently. They are both stubborn and passionate and I don’t think either of them are the yielding type. He is a little more than she is but not completely? So they would need to work on that and on making sure they keep this a balanced dynamic. But still it’s A Good Thing. They’re A Good Thing! :)

9. What are five other fictional couples who you thinks have a “Reylo” dynamic?

so I do think they are deeply, iconically themselves and I struggle to think of a couple in popular culture whose love story is as interwoven with and as central to the main theme of the story- in that their love IS the main theme, the core, the heart. I’ve certainly never seen it in a blockbuster, family action movie before. But i know what you mean and this is a great question.

Darcy and Elizabeth (mostly to annoy Tumblr and that one post that keeps showing up in my recommended about how you’re wrong to compare them because don’t you know kylo MURDERED PEOPLE and Darcy didn’t- slams head into a brick wall)

Delena (they’re actually very different in terms of personality and couple style but I think of them in a parallel way because they’re both couples where their very existence makes you think about what love IS)

Amy and Rory (just for their “the universe can’t tell us what to do” dynamic)

Romeo and Juliet (because they are jUST SO YOUNG and potentially tragic)

Eugene/Rapunzel (because....i said so)

10. What’s an observation about Reylo you’ve never made before?

Hmm. Something I have trouble articulating about them and so have never really talked about before (and I guess this circles back to the first question) (and this is more of an opinion than on observation?) is how important symbolism is for them.

It’s really easy to exaggerate and/or ignore the symbolism (including but not limited to sexual symbolism) going on with them in both movies. But it’s part of what makes their story so rich- that so much of what’s happening with them is happening under the surface and I’d love to pay more attention to it at some point. There’s a reason they feel like every love story and fit every song and it has a lot to do with symbolism.

#darcy interviews bing #m&e interviews #reylo

35 notes · View notes

theglassishalfsomething · 6 years ago

Photo

Kylo/Rey

#em and i are going to be interviewing each other about reylo next #so here's a reminder that the creators of this blog love reylo #ALSO THIS IS SOME NEXT LEVEL FAN ART #reylo #(this is bing)

6K notes · View notes

theglassishalfsomething · 6 years ago

Text

Darcy Interviews Bing: Jane Austen

1. What is your favorite JA film adaptation of all time?

the 1995 mini series of Pride and Prejudice. It’s very special to me because I grew up with it so there is so much warmth and comfort and familiarity and happy memories tied up with it, but I also think that it’s just really wonderfully written and acted and filmed. And Jennifer is my favorite Lizzy. I love her warmth and sweetness and archness and charm. She’s so RIGHT.

2. You always defend Northanger Abbey to those who give it a lower ranking (aka me). Can you give me three sentences (I KNOW) as an elevator pitch to win someone over to it? And of course by win someone over to it, I assume we all already love it, but how would you convince someone it deserves top billing?

haha okay! But can I just say in advance, that I DO understand why it isn’t everyone’s favorite.

A 3 sentence elevator pitch for NA.

This is a story about learning how to tell false friends from true, hypocrisy from virtue, true love from empty promises. It’s about a soft-hearted naive girl who grows up without needing to be stripped of her softness or shown that “real life” is always ugly and cruel. And it’s about the fact that sometimes in this imperfect world love grows where you give it and that it’s not less worthy for being a response to the interest you show and give first.

3. What’s the most underserved Austen novel? Like, which one hasn’t been adapted enough, or well enough?

Oh. Mansfield Park. I want a good adaptation of this!!!!!!!!

4. Who’s the Mr. Darcy of RIGHT NOW?

This isn’t perfect but my instinct says Adam Driver. There are a lot of differences but there is something about who they are (or seem to be, sadly Adam and I are not personal friends) at their core that is similar to me. They both strikes me as men of integrity and dignity and like they’d both command a room simply by coming into it. Adam seems WARMER and more affectionate but also when Darcy is comfortable he’s very quietly affectionate. With the people they love, there is a lot of sweetness there.

Also Adam would never consider himself a Darcy and that’s how he proves he’s not actually a Wickham.

5. Do you think that Jane Austen is the originator of the romcom, or that her approach to love stories differs from what we think of as “romcom formula”/tropes?

Oh wow! Great question! ! I think Pride and Prejudice kicked off a very specific type of romcom that has exploded in popularity especially in the last couple of decades. But overall her works are different than the average romcom and so, so, so much better. The PLOTS of her stories are so beautiful to me because they spring organically and truthfully from her character’s choices and temperaments and circumstances. Her stories are like real life, and honestly she’s spoiled me for the average romcom and its ridiculous premises and contrivances. I LOVE romcoms, but then do I? I love their potential but am frequently frustrated by how dumb their stories are when Austen proves that you can tell ordinary love stories that make sense and hold together without a String of Tropes.

Idk, Austen is better. Way better. So much better. Miles better.

6. Let’s play a more sanitized version of FMK--who would you 1) Do the dishes with, 2) Watch a sunrise with, and 3) Have a poetry read-aloud with?

I would do the dishes with Edward Ferrars; I think he’d relax and open up with something to do. I’d watch a sunrise with Knightley because I feel like he would enjoy its beauty but not be unbearably emotional about it so we could have a nice walk back talking about other things. I’d have a poetry read-aloud with Mr. Tilney because that just seems FUN. Plus he’s got enough snark and spirit to keep it from being sentimental.

7. What do you think of Becoming Jane?

Oh I love it so much. It’s painful so I don’t often rewatch it but it means a great deal to me. I have no idea how accurate it is to Jane Austen’s life but that doesn’t matter as much to me because it has one of my favorite themes of love stories- which is that, sometimes, in order to really love someone you have to walk away. Sometimes the answer isn’t to follow your heart and marry where it’s imprudent and dangerous; sometimes it’s better to break a heart now than start something you won’t have the strength to finish. I watched it when I was 16 or 17 and honestly I was Shook™.

Plus, Anna Maxwell Martin is kind of the Love of My Life and she’s such a good Cassandra. I LOVE HER.

8. What’s the best order to read the novels in?

ooh! I’m not sure. I guess it’s cliche but I would actually say start with Pride and Prejudice. It’s a great introduction. I would say the order for the rest should run Emma, Sense and Sensibility, Mansfield Park, Northanger Abbey, and then end with Persuasion. But I wouldn’t die on this hill. Any order works I think. :D

9. What do you think Jane’s favorite modern love story would be?

This just popped into my head but I think she’d love Crazy Rich Asians!!! Jane loves fairytales and family dysfunction and sacrifices.

10. Do you think Jane Austen HAD a flaw in storytelling? What was it?

Actually I don’t. I think like every other artist Jane was doing what she was doing and not doing what she wasn’t doing so if we look at her work trying to find something that wasn’t there because it was never supposed to be there I suppose we could find deficiencies. But that’s not very productive or worthwhile. To me, as much as is humanly possible in this imperfect world, she’s a flawless artist and storyteller. She’s incredible. I’m genuinely so grateful for the enormous gifts she’s given us.

#jane austen #darcy interviews bing #I loved answering these #amazing questions emma #m&e interviews

15 notes · View notes