the-second-jar - Tumblr blog

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every time i see a post with Bill telling people to buy his book, it reminds me of the BDG “Buy My Bed” video. so i did this, as a way to celebrate finally getting my copy.

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I cannot stand the parodies of modern major general, they're overdone and simply not as good as the original. They've done them about everything, whatever topic, big or small.

And when i notice one of them my eyes will always start to roll.

The diction's always slurry when they rush the complicated words, and adding many fricatives will turn it so cacophonous. The slanted rhymes are silly and they keep just making more and more, please someone stop the parodies of modern major general.

The scanning of the lyrics in the meter is unbearable, they emphazise the syllables in ways that are untenable, in short in matters musical, prosodic and ephemeral, i cannot stand the parodies of modern major general!

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On my recent cabbage merchant art someone commented on this man’s sheer resilience and how he was the Sisyphus of ATLA and that inspired me.

[ID in Alt Text]

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Tears of the Kingdom: Wiggle to Detach (colorized)

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Twilight: How do you want to be remember?

Time: By my character.

Sky: By my kindness.

Legend: By my merit.

Wind: Freaking Stained Glass Windows.

Twilight:...What?

Wind:...Freaking....Stained Glass Windows.

(Later in Spirit Track's Castle.)

Zelda: And this is the room dedicated to the Hero of the Winds. There are several detailed Stained Glass Windows about his adventures.

Wind: HECK YEAH!!!!

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Some internet language things I really like:

Phrases like “that’s certainly a thing”, “it’s so shaped”, or “one of the most animals” (is there a name for this?)

when people write with little to no punctuation like they are just so done

More specifically, asking questions without punctuation i.e. ‘what’ or ‘why’. It’s like, you want to know but also you are resigned to the answer?

When people capitalise The Thing for emphasis - particularly if they add a trademark symbol to really drive The Point™ home

How we use both bold and italic text for emphasis, but they convey it in different ways and I can’t quite explain how

Responding to things exclusively with punctuation, because sometimes words fail you and all you can say is !!!

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everyone ever needs to play spirit tracks

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So like, in botw all food- whether or not it has an effect on it or was made with bad ingredients- can heal you. Better yet, they also can make you resistant to heat or cold, make you sneaky, or energize you! All you have to do is put in the right ingredients.

The only drawback is the effects don’t last as long as an elixir (the time only increases when you put in more of the ingredient, or a different one with the same effect. Different ingredients with different effects will cancel each other out and make it a neutral healing dish), which is a fair trade given how you also get health in return.

Wild takes notice of the boy’s issues and handles it accordingly, because magic healing food is very normal in his world. You can imagine his confusion when the others are screaming about how they are suddenly so fast that they’re tripping over their feet, or how it went from blistering hot to pleasantly cool, or how they can’t for the life of them find Wind who is literally standing right next to them, perfectly silent.

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The opening title screen. Honestly it was seeing this that made me want to play the game. So I had to do it!

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Some Twilight headcanons I have:

He has a really nice singing voice, but he struggles to say on-key/keep the right pitches

He’s got a burn scar on his collarbone and a little up his neck from where the Shadow Being grabbed him

Since being turned into Wolf Link originally, he’s slowly going colorblind (this one’s from this fic)

His sense of balance is impeccable

He’s actually allergic to cats, he just doesn’t care

He’s afraid of the dark because he keeps thinking he sees Twili creatures everywhere

He got made fun of by Dusk’s court for his accent for a while until he stopped an assassination attempt and they they stopped making fun of him

His wolf form can see ghosts (technically the Twili Spirits aren’t ghosts)

He’s got an immune system of steel except for illnesses from Warrior’s Hyrule, where there are tons of big cities and foreign peoples all mingled together

Going off that he doesn’t get sick often but when he does it’s bad and he’s basically delirious

He’s afraid of fire (a surprising amount of things in Twilight Princess catch on fire)

His accent gets stronger in rural areas (like Ordon Village or Lon Lon Ranch)

He carries a little fragment of the Twili Mirror in his bag

He talks to his shadow sometimes as if Midna is still there

His Twili Magic hates light magic and he struggles to use any of it (especially the Dominion Rod)

The Twili Magic gets worse on Blood Moons to the point where touching Triforce-bearers is painful (especially Sky cause he’s got the Master Sword)

Less angsty, sometimes if he’s not thinking he’ll do wolf things in Hylian form

Example A: he’s caught things in his mouth when they’re thrown to him

Example B: yawning/stretching like a dog (you know what I mean)

Example C: he sniffs for things like a dog

His sense of smell is actually better than a Hylian’s normally would be, as a matter of fact

that’s all for now! Chances are I’ll post a part two at some point :) thanks for reading!

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Zelda Awakening her Power. 

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A thing for ferret Wars: Ferrets will fight literally anything that moves for fun/to start a game of chase so please imagine with me Warriors attacking everyone’s feet because ‘how dare you just walk past me’ with the confidence of his usual full size packed into this teeny tiny body.

Alternatively; Ferrets like to hoard small objects. My friend’s ferret would steal bracelets and hide them in its nest. So Wars sneaking into Legend’s bag and pulling out rings and such just to stick them in places he’d normally sleep when they’re traveling, like Four’s hood or something.

GVIEAGYUVA HE LPhe's literally perfect i love him so much. "ow- wars stop. OWWARS .WARRIORS-" - twilight, being attacked by a very persistent and confident ferret

absolutely ADORE the idea of this Little Guy digging through legend's bag and stealing rings and trinkets ,,,thief. criminal

also h . have u. have u guys c. have u guys considered

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BotW Dragon trio! I think Dinraal was my favourite to do.

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Jojo excellently brings up the fact that most of Twilights strength is all natural and I desperately want to talk about that.

Link is 17 in twilight princess and can yeet a full-grown goat without problem. And ordon goats are not tiny like ours tend to be they are almost cow sized.

Now to top that. He can also yeet a full sized Goron. Yes he needs the boots to keep him from get knocked on his ass. But the boots do not add to his upper body and grip strength. He has the grip strength to stop their rolling, and the upper body strength to drag and throw them without falling over. AT THE AGE OF 17!!

So him at whatever age he currently is, is bound to be a little terrifying when it comes to strength.

Not only has he kept up with the heroing but he's also kept the fee items he has and each of them have a lot of uses.

Now we get to the whole reason for this rant. The boots.

In the game he struggles to move around very well in the Iron boots. But with years of practice? Aside from understandably heavy and noisy foot steps still I be he could walk normally in them by now.

Meaning given the chance he could absolutely crush someone with his legs without help if he needs too.

Because even if he doesn't use them all the time he would probably keep up with specific training to keep it so he can use them easily, it only makes sense.

So yeah...absolutely terrifying

A skilled fighter with natural hunting instincts that could crush you in more ways than one.

Yet he hits you with that adorable golden retriever boy smile and and all you see is fluffy little ranch hand just being a dork.

Help.

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high school is soo funny in hindsight. the entire time you're there thinking it's the most important period of your life and then the second you're out you're like well that was fucking stupid

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Satori Spring! Probably my favourite location in BoTW.

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