thatpersonalex18

[thatpersonalex18]

How to Grow Up

A guide on how to grow up. It was originally posted by @/friendliness but half the links were broken. So I took what links weren't broken and added other links and more things to know.

This is USA based resources

Personal

Reasons to Stay Alive – A Tumblr post of 116 reasons to stay alive by @/friendliness.

How to Get Better At Asking for Help – Website is Harvard Business Review. The article is “5 Ways to Get Better At Asking for Help” by Wayne Baker.

What to do if you Can’t Afford Therapy – Website is Psych Central and the article is by Steven Rowe.

How to Quit Smoking – “The 22 Best Ways to Quit Smoking” by Debra L. Gordon and David L. Katz M.D. from the Healthy Digest.

How to Legally Change your Name – Website is Forbes.

Wanna Learn Something New? – A Tumblr post made by @/hamletthedane with various new things to try from language learning to ballet.

Free Harvard Courses – Harvard University’s free online courses.

Getting a New Computer? – A quick and dirty comprehensive guide by WIRED on what to look for.

How to Sew – Website is Autodesk Indestructibles. The article is “How to Sew” by Jessyratfink. Having a small sewing kit (that you can pick up from nearly any craft store) is super handy and has saved my life and clothes.

What to Look For in Clothes A YouTube video by Alyssa Beltempo titled “How to Identify High Quality vs. Poor Quality Clothing | Slow Fashion”. Here’s a WikiHow [x] if a YouTube video isn’t your style.

Dealing with Executive Dysfunction – A Tumblr post made by @/compassionatereminders. It's a list to more links on how to deal with executive dysfunction.

Another List Like this One – A Tumblr post made by a now deactivated account. It's a list much like this one.

Home

What’s a mortgage? – Website is realtor.com and the page is called “What is a Mortgage? Home Loan Basics Explained” by Cathie Ericson.

First Apartment Checklist – A checklist PDF. Here’s another link to a Tumblr checklist [x] 

What to Ask Landlords Before Renting? – “25 Questions To Ask a Landlord When Renting a Home” by Morgen Henderson.

What’s Renter’s Insurance? – Website is Forbes Advisor. The article is by Jason Metz and titled “How to Get Renters Insurance”.

Plant Care – A master list of how to care for plants made by @/difficults

Job

Time Management – Website is Entrepenuer and has 10 time management tips. One I personally recommend is keeping a physical calendar book on hand. I keep mine in my bag with a designated pen.

Finding the right job – Website is The Muse and it has 13 free career assessment tests.

Make a resume – Website is Resume Now. Many hirers look at your name, the middle of the page (where your experience list is) and skim the rest.

Job Interview Tips – Website is Linkedin. The article is titled “10 Job Interview Tips to Land The Career of Your Dreams” by Caren Merrick.

How to Write a Cover Letter – Website is The Writing Center. University of Winsconsin, Madison. It’s titled “Writing Cover Letters” and I can’t find the author.

Money

Couponing! – Website is Coupon Database :: Southern Savers. It has a list of mobile apps for coupons to places.

Call 211 for Help – the website leads to 211.org. It's anonymous and can help you get connected to food programs, paying bills and things like doctor appointments. Here’s a Tumblr post about it [x] by @/poessionisamyth

Groceries! – This is a Tumblr meme post, but scrolling through tags/reblogs/replies and there’s plenty of good tips. The post is by @/charlotten

What To Do if You Can’t Pay Your Bills – Website is Nolo. The article is “When You Can’t Pay Your Bills: Thiings To Know” that was updated by Amy Loftsgordon. 

Are You Paying Too Much for Your Phone Bill? – An article by Beht Beverman titled “How Much is Too Much to Pay for a Cell Phone Bill?”.

54 Ways to Save Money – Website is America Saves.

How to Do Taxes – Website is Wiki-How.

The 70/20/10 Method – Website is Business Insider. The Article is “A Beginners Guide to the 70-20–10 Budgeting Method” by Paul Kim.

Side Hustle Ideas – Website is Forbes. “30 Side Hustle Ideas To Make Extra Money In 2024” by Krista Fabregas.

Emergency

Your Rights When a Cop Pulls you Over – Website is Business Insider. Cops are allowed to lie to you, and they will, so be careful.

Hotline List – The website is DoSomething.org. Depression/Suicide, domestic abuse, child abuse and runaway/homeless/and at-risk youth hotlines.

What to Keep in Your Car – Website is MentalFloss. I live in a snowy area that gets blizzards and bad ice. I keep blankets, water and other aids in my car as well as a knife and road flare. I also own a self jumping car battery and it has saved my ass more than once. Heimlich Maneuver – A one minute video by the Mayo Clinic.

The Heimlich Maneuver on Yourself – A one minute video by The List Show TV.

What to Keep in Your Wallet – Website is PureWow. The article is by Rachel Bowie. Keep your drivers license, medical insurance card, and an emergency contact in your card. If you have a pet home alone make sure that you have a card detailing this. Free printable one here [x]

Traveling

Packing List – Website is Smarter Travel.

Traveling with Little to No Money – Website is Nomadic Matt.

How to Pack a Suitcase – Website is Real Simple. The article is by Thersa O’Rourke.

How to Apply for a Passport – Website is WikkiHow.

Making a Travel Budget – Website is Travel Made Simple. “How to Make a Travel Budget” by Ali Garland

[thatpersonalex18]

Hot water

Tw: self hatred/self harm

Every night at the same time exactly,

I step into the shower to wash myself for five minutes precisely.

I take the shampoo and scrub it into my hair,

Letting the soap drip into my eyes as I try not to swear.

I don’t touch the shampoo-mother says it makes my hair greasy,

She says it would make me look easy.

I run the soap bar over my body,

My stomach getting knotty.

My face starts to fall apart,

I begin to cry as I wish I could restart.

I fall to my knees as the hot water scratches at my back.

I feel the pain.

Gods do I love the pain.

The pain that almost makes me feel human.

The pain I so deserve.

Like the hounds of hell themselves, the water scalds my skin.

Making me feel human,

Oh so human.

- A.F.A Makar

[thatpersonalex18]

The After shower

Tw: Self hatred/self harm

I sit in the bathtub. Now I understand why girls keep the water scorching. I sit down, feeling the water scratch at my back like the dog of hell. Now I understand why the girls get pretty after saying ‘beauty is pain’. I sit under the shower head praying that it will burn every last cell off my body-be-rid me of the sins that occurred in the last few hours. As I sit under the burning water I finally understand. I can feel something, some morsel of humanity within the pain I’m experiencing. I almost don’t feel like a monster as I claw at my skin. As I ask the gods why. As I cry to myself hearing those words my brother told me. As I question why he did to me what he did.

- A. F. A. Makar

[thatpersonalex18]

Hot Air Balloon

When we were younger we had an eccentric old man for a neighbour, and he owned a hot air balloon.

Whenever we would ask him about it he would tell us he had travelled everywhere with it, even the moon.

We’d laugh at the absurdity, and tell him there is no way it was true.

He’d pick up the toothpick from between his lips and wave it at us, saying: as true as a cow’s moo.

Then he’d sit us in the basket and watch the wonderful worlds we’d pave.

And now we stand, crying at the hot air balloon carved on his grave.

But every time I look at the skyline from this eccentric old balloon:

I see his face smiling from the horizon and then moon.

- A.F.A Makar

[thatpersonalex18]

Two Trees

There are two identical trees I see,

They stand together, content as can be.

They dance gleefully in the summer,

And hold each other bare in the winter.

I watch them from my maths class,

Bored, trapped behind the glass.

But there? They laugh free,

Loving with a love stronger than me.

-A.F.A Makar

[thatpersonalex18]

“All parents damage their children. It cannot be helped. Youth, like pristine glass, absorbs the prints of its handlers. Some parents smudge, others crack, a few shatter childhoods completely into jagged little pieces, beyond repair.”

— Mitch Albom

[thatpersonalex18]

So sometimes, i like to convince myself that im not traumatised and I’m making it all up. HOWEVER, my mum was on my ass about some homework thats due in two weeks so I told her Id done part of it (i had, just not as much as she thought) so now Im doing it in my room so she doesn’t know (she also doesn’t know I have this phone up here) and I was listening to Darling by christian leave. Now for those of you who dont know, darling has a sudden pop because they hit the drums a certain way at 1.03-ish into the song. So ya boi, unsuspecting is listening while doing this with HELLA anxiety and I’m worried she’s coming to my room as I write ‘would’ I fuck up the d and write an O because the pop scared my will to live back into me. Idk the point of this but yk

[thatpersonalex18]

The gender euphoria when your workout starts showing results>>>>

Trans joy is something so unique and pure that it genuinely is indescribable. It is one of the best feelings in the world, especially when you don’t have the luxury to have a supportive family.

[thatpersonalex18]

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU TURN SNAPCHAT ON DARK MODE😭😭😭😭😭

I GOT A NEW PHONE AND ITS HELL!!!

From now on, im just gonna shitpost all my thoughts.

[thatpersonalex18]

From now on, im just gonna shitpost all my thoughts.

[thatpersonalex18]

He Frustrates Me

He frustrates me,

He is everything I try to be.

He is the beautiful ray of sunshine,

He is the smell of the dark forest pine.

His smile is the first setting of snow,

His hair is darker than the hide of a doe.

His posture is hunched,

His smug face deserves to be punched.

He is arrogance,

He is a wince.

He is a critical teacher,

He is a frustrating preacher.

His grating voice sings the songs of angels

His perfect smile hides teeth of whack paddles

His laugh is a thousand rusty nails

His intellect can cure all your ails

He starts everything but commits to a peep

He commands an army but wants to sleep

He’s beautiful but he fell out of favour

-A.F.A. Makar

[thatpersonalex18]

Words

I dont have the words,

I never have.

I dont have the words of leaders,

I dont have the kind of words that hold power.

I dont have the words to tell people that fighting is useless.

War is futile but my words are pointless.

I dont have the words to teach man that war and violence does nothing.

I dont have the words to show them the horrors and destruction they cause

When they could just sit down and talk because

They have the words.

And even if I were given a platform,

To yell,

And scream;

These cowards would still go to war.

And I’d make a fool of myself because

I dont have the words.

Even if you were to extract the idea from my brain:

There’d never be enough words that can be formulated from any lexicon to even begin to understand the sentiment because:

I dont have the words.

I dont have the words to show my outrage at people’s disregard of their planet.

I dont have the words to scold the past generations for making us clean up their mess.

I dont have the words to show what their greed and negligence  has done to their home.

I don’t have the words to show people how they are condemning their children with their oversight of their planet.

Even if there was a live stream, where I could rant and cry at the world;

They’d still destroy their only home with overwhelming apathy.

And I’d make a fool of myself because

I dont have the words.

It frustrates me every day that ��

I dont have the words.

I don’t have the words to show people how little their leaders care about them.

I don’t have the words to teach people how badly the bigotry can affect people. 

I don’t have the words to persuade people to be even just a little nicer. I don’t have the words to teach people why “all lives matter” inherently negates “black lives matter”.

I don’t have the words to explain why Cis and Straight people don’t get a pride flag. 

I don’t have the words to stop people is prejudices.

I don’t have the words to educate people on the differences between Islam, and though the terrorists who pervert it.

I don’t have the words to show the world the vile things are refugees and immigrants have go through just to be ridiculed by the country they’ve escaped to.

I don’t have the words to teach people why women say, “kill all men”.

I don’t have the words to convince people that anyone other than native cis white straight men should have rights. 

Even in a meeting with anyone who have the slightest shred of influence,

I could scream,

I could rant,

I could yell,

I could cry,

I could shout,

I could break down.

But they still oppress people for things they can’t control.

and I’d make a fool of myself because

I don’t have the words.

I’d scream from the rooftops,

but I don’t have the words.

If I did, I tell you every day how beautiful you are:

I tell you the sunsets are jealous of your smile.

I tell you that God’s favourite Angel is envious because you were chiselled out of the purest Alexandrite.

Id tell you Apollo’s harp is nowhere near to the sound of your laugh.

Id tell you you look like a Taylor Swift song.

Every day i try to go and tell you how pretty you are.

But you’re standing there with,

All your friends and,

All the fourteen eyes on me because I’m interrupting the conversation for…what exactly?

To stammer and stutter and make an absolute fool of myself in front of them because,

I just don’t have the words.

You’d think if you looked at what I’ve done,

“Now that’s a man who has the words”

But my brain is just a big bowl of twisted scribbles,

Rolled up into one big knot,

And whenever I try and find the words to speak,

They just tumble out in to a vomit of turmoil.

And when I try and tell you, even though I want to be more, that I just want to be friends;

the words just jumble up and travelling an endless loop from my mouth to my brain to my stomach to my mouth because

I just don’t have the words.

Yesterday you said that was the funniest thing I’d said,

And he told me, “those words were yours, you have the words”

But I fumble and care and overthink, and I can’t pick the right words.

What if I say the wrong thing?

What if I make you think worse of me?

What if I offend someone?

I wish I could speak some

I wish I could find the words or the courage 

I wish there was a VR world where I could practice saying it so I can get it right.

And I wouldn’t make a fool of myself because

I’d have the words.

I know I don’t have the words to stop wars.

I know I don’t have the words to fix climate change.

I know I definitely don’t have the words to save people from bigotry. But maybe one day,

I can have the words to tell you how I feel about you.

- A.F.A.Makar



[thatpersonalex18]

Who wants to be my penpal?

Im looking for a penpal so i can find a friend to write letters with :D

[thatpersonalex18]

Brown eyes

Brown eyes,

The common older sister to the blue eyed younger brother.

Brown eyes,

Written and stamped in bold.

Brown eyes,

Those that share the colour and many secret that a bookshelf holds.

Beautiful brown eyes,

The colour of my favourite tree.

Brown eyes,

The colour of childhood, wild and free.

Brown, brown eyes,

The colour of the fallen leaf.

Brown eyes,

The colour of the dinner chairs before the evening beef.

Burnt brown eyes,

The colour of the scalding coffee on the morning trip to work.

Bejewelled brown eyes,

The colour of hot chocolate to keep away the cold that lurks.

Brown eyes,

The colour of his.

The colour of him.

Brown,

The colour of his arrogance when he does better than everyone else.

The colour of his stress when he’s overwhelmed

The colour of his impatience as he rushes down the corridor.

The colour of his annoyance when I go too far.

The colour of his happiness when he’s with his friends.

Brown,

Coffee,

Walnut,

Chocolate,

Syrup,

Hickory,

Brown,

Her beautiful brown hair.

-A.F.A.Makar

[thatpersonalex18]

Ok, i waited. I was patient, i waited five episodes where the FUCK is my pretty boy genius.

[thatpersonalex18]

I forget straight people exist. It’s crazy, cause like, I’ll be scrolling and then make it to a video of a man simping for Jena Ortega and be like “why are cis men simping for her-

Oh wait they’re straight”

AND THE WORSE PART?

I have a crush on a straight boy-

[thatpersonalex18]

Ok this is really pissing me off, you don’t smell your crush in amortentia. You smell your favourite scents, like yes Hermione smelt Ron’s hair but that’s because she liked the smell.