#zero time to make a split screen this week

[alienpossession]

This is the original post by @mindmelter

I think the tatted hunk knew how much I went nuts for him because he literally brought a friend along just a couple hours after the alien slithered into him with my help. This friend is similarly built with the tatted hunk (dare I say bigger) and he seemed to be more of a rugged, non-Caucasian version

This friend's takeover only happened hours after they walked out from the elevator and do God knows what in the tatted hunk's room. This time, the friend entered the elevator all alone as the time shown that it's almost sunrise. Judging from his look, he seemed to be heading to the gym and clearly they fucked the night before. I press the button to release yet another alien, and he seems to be too deep in his own thinking until it's too late as the alien already shot itself to his ear when he realized from his peripheral vision that something is lurking near him. He thrashed around wildly, a common occurence I already used to see for the past few months which indicate that the alien is on the process of covering the entirety of the human brain with its slimy self, and I obviously fished out my cock from my uniform while enjoying the sight.

After all the usual moves of physique check coupled with a quick self-worship, the alien then surprised me with his request

"Open up the access to your office, human. I want to meet you directly,"

"Okay, why?"

"We didn't employ you to ask question, human. Just do it,"

I have zero idea what is up with this particular one, but if it's like the encounter that happened during the early weeks I started this whole arrangement with them, well I expect him to fuck the shit out of my mouth, which I don't really mind if I have to be honest, but judging from the time, this is quite a risky move as the next shift is about to start in 40 minutes.

But I eventually let him walk into the control room since I'm not going to mess around with a slimy extraterrestrial being that can make my brain obsolete and practically turned me into a meat puppet. Once inside, he told me to open up the folder filled with all the video I have of all the takeover. I gulped before asking him

"Why?"

"How many times do I need to remind you that we don't employ you to ask questions, human. Just open the folder," As I double-click the folder and revealed the 68 videos of the takeover, he grinned at me

"Let's make video 69, shall we?" He double-clicked the video titled "The Three Musk-eeters" which I vividly remembered to showcase three gym junkie that just finished their late preparation for some sort of worldwide bodybuilding competition taken over by one slime that managed to split itself into 3 and made the three into a closely-coordinated unit that operates in group.

The video played while the tatted hunk draped his muscular arm over my shoulder and rested his chin on top of my head while his hand fondled my cock. "Sir, why are we doing this now? This is almost the end of my shift, what if the next shift walks in to us doing all this?"

"Well, you can always use a helping hand, don't you think? Oh fuck, look at them going at the blond's dick, how long you held that elevator LOL?"

"T---ten minaaaggghh---minutes,"

"Seems like you won't last that long if I keep this up, next video!" He stopped jacking off my cock, but not before he tugged at it very quickly I started to leak pre. Then, with that slick sweaty and slightly coated hands of his, he handily used the mouse to click on another video randomly. It opens the one titled "Gun-totting Russian" as he then moved away from his previous position and instead kneeling to then expertly swallowed the entirety of my 5.5 incher hardening cock.

All the crazy head action happened while my eyes fixated on the screen that shows how the big Russian dude, Maksim, managed to grab the slime and tossed it right before it shot itself to his ear canal. Then, he swiftly shot at the slime and split it into two, thinking that he just killed some sort of weird abomination or something. He then squatted, his big mistake, to check on what kind of shit that just attacked him but before he could thoroughly check it, the two slimes leapt from the floor right to his mouth and ear. He screamed to no avail as he flailed on the floor, all 240 pounds of his muscle jerked uncontrollably as the alien started its violent takeover of his massive body. The video successfully pushed my cock to reach its full mast at almost 6 inches and I can feel that I'm so close to shoot my load before the tatted dude stop the head action

"Ohhh.......judging from the file name and the sound made, it must be Maksim Alimov," he said to me while still placing himself in between my legs with his mouth hovering right in front of my cock and his nose exhaling warm air right to my tip, "Big catch, don't you think? Probably the most notorious one among the other 68. Must be crazy hot to think that such a ruthless mob boss on the run like Alimov there is merely a dumb muscle puppet *slow lick around my tip* controlled by my kind, all thanks to a lowly security *gentle flick of his tongue right on my piss slit* like you," he finished his sentence right when I eventually shoot the warm geyser all over his face.

He chuckled at the sudden eruption and in a shocking display of his puppet's physical advantage, his long tongue cleanly lapped the surrounding of his lips, chin and even the tip of his pointy nose. He then grabbed my day-old underwear and use it as if it's some kind of cloth to clean the rest of his face before tossing it back to me

"Well, that's video 69 for ya. No takeover but I bet it will be your favorite from now on because why on Earth a straight, macho tatted hunk like me willingly kneel and then eat your cum unless I'm just a brainless human with no free will whatsoever, right?"

I nodded in embarassment as his statement managed to make my softening cock hardened once more

"Fuck, you're one horny guy. Hmm too bad it's 5:47 now, clean yourself up quickly before your shift replacement comes. I'll see you later and keep up the good work, security man," he said as he quickly dashed out to the parking lot, probably roleplaying as the tatted hunk driving his sports car to do his morning gym routine.

As I finished dressing up, saving the recording of this very room from the time he came until he left just now and replaced it with fake recording of me just sat in silence, the time on the screen shows 5:52, and a fit-looking daddy just entered the elevator to come down for his breakfast.

Noting the usual time needed for takeover and how my friend Juan usually came a bit late around 6:03 to 6:05, I pressed the button to recruit this daddy to the collective. I'm this close to press the button once the daddy walked out from the elevator to have his breakfast in the hotel restaurant and a shirtless buzz blond stud walked into the elevator. But, it's 5:58 and I'm not about to risk Juan to witness what I'm up to, so I just sighed and prepare myself to leave for the day. Next time you'll not be so lucky, stud.

[sofasoap]

Forget me not.

Pairing: König x  f!Reader ( aka Mini MacTavish )

Summary: The bad news you never want to hear, and more. Takes place after Interlude two : Everyone deserves happiness.

Warning: Mature theme. TRIGGER WARNING: gun violence,blood and gore and death.  English isn’t my first language. You are responsible for your own media consumption.

A/N : Character of Mini MacTavish is from @saltofmercury fic “ “The Favorite MacTavish” ” which she graciously let me borrow and write bit more expanded universe. Please go read her wonderful story to get bit of background,

“masterlist” for more prequel to this Mini MacTavish expanded verse.

Staring at the screen, drumming your fingers on the desk. You can't seem to concentrate. You been typing the same sentence for the last thirty minute and making no progress at all. Decided to give up on doing your clinical reports, you dragged yourself into the staff room to make yourself a cup of tea. You been feeling very antsy all day, it's a bad sign. Everytime you feel very fidgety nothing good came out from it. Last time it was Johnny declared MIA , your poor Ma cried her heart out until him and Ghost was found a month later, alive but worse for wear.

Your thought gone back to the boys again. It has been seven weeks since they left for their mission. There had been zero contact from them, but you weren't surprised. There have been times they will be silent for weeks until just before they return home. But this time it's different. Senses are tingling. Mindlessly stirring your cup, you saw the HR manager walking by. Doing a double take when they saw you in the staff room, " Oh Mini, I was on my way to find you. Your emergency leave application has been approved." They informed you. You frowned. What leave? You weren't planning any holiday until Christmas. Your phone went off at the same time. Unknown number. You answered it after hesitating for a split second, " Hello MacTavish here." " ... Mini." The deep distinctive Manchester accent. "... Simon?" " Go home now, pack your bag. Soap will be waiting for you in one hour. Don't forget your passport." and he hung up immediately. " Wait wh... UGh". Sculling down your tea, you rush towards the locker room and grabbed your bag, not bothering to get changed you drove home as fast as you can. Throwing all the necessary stuff into the duffle bag, you send Emma a text explaining your haste departure, you heard a car pulling up in front of your flat. Seeing your brother's face , you hurryingly lock the door and throw your bag into the boot. Giving Johnny a quick kiss on the face, you bombard him with questions while he drive off towards the airport. "Johnny, what the hell is going on?, Is that a bruise on your face??? Ah Jesus did you get shot as well??!!" You reach out trying to touch him, he swat your hands away. " Ah I'm fine stop fussing. We going on next flight to Germany." He didn't elaborate further. " Who put my leaves in?" " Price managed to pull few strings. Your boss wasn't too overly impressed but a word from the high up shut them up pretty quick." You sunk back into the seat. You doubt you will get anymore answer out from him until reaching the destination. The rest of your trip was spent mostly in silence. You can see Johnny is trying to hide something. He is never good at holding secrets from you. Always can tell by his body language.

Gaz was there to pick you two up from the airport. He tries to make little chit chat with you during the car ride to... somewhere? This got you confused even more. Aren't the boys on a long term mission? " Where is Simon and Uncle Price?" "At the hospital." Soap interjected. " OH Gosh something happened to them?" " No they are fine. Don't you worry."

" Why isn't anyone telling me anything????" Gaz pulled into what looks like military hospital car park, everyone got off and he gave you a sympathetic look. As you walk further into the hospital wing, you starting to put two and two together. Johnny is here, Gaz is here, Simon and Price is fine... so that leaves... König. " Where is König?" Both Gaz and Soap stop on their track. They look at each other. Soap is getting agitated, he couldn't tell his sister the truth of this visit. He couldn't. He felt guilty. He felt responsible for what happened. " Mini... Look.." " MINI." As Gaz open his mouth to explain. Ghost appeared. You ran towards your adopted big brother and pull him into a tight hug. He return your hug and proceed to lead the group to one of the private ward, tucked away in the deepest part of the hospital. Putting his hand on the door knob, pausing for a moment, before opening it. You see Price sitting on the chair in the corner who gave you a wave as soon as he saw you, and you turn your attention to the person currently lying on the hospital bed, with all the tubes and machine attached. It's your big teddy bear, the love of your life. König. Your mind goes blank, body started to shake. Soap came up beside you and pull you in with one arm. " He's been in coma for about a week or so now. Doctor said he is in critical but stable condition. I am sorry Mini... It... It was my fault.. I should have been more aware .. " " Don't fully take the blame Johnny." Ghost sighed. " We weren't too sure what was going to happen." He patted your head. It's something he started doing lately to comfort you. " You shouldn't even be here really. Someone owed Price a huge favour, so we manage to get you here without problem." You glance at Price with gratitude. The boys left you alone with some privacy while four of them have left the hospital for military related business, but promise you one of them will take turn to stay with you during the time of your stay. You put your bag in the corner of the room, out of the way and pulled a chair in so you can sit closer to him. He look so pale. There are still some bruises on the side of his face where he took some sort of hit. Lifting your hand you run your fingers through his hair, gently down his face. Tears starting to drop. Leaning your head on his big hand, the gentle hand you love so much and cried yourself to sleep. The boys were true to their words, They take turn in shifts to stay with you. Gaz usually try to have little chit chat with you, Johnny and you usually bickers about stuff, Both you and Price sits there silently, him going through his mission files and reports, while you do some administration work on your laptop. Simon just sit there and read books. It's not until one morning about a week into your visit, Gaz has ducked out and grabbed some coffee for both of you, you notice his hand twitched a little, and he is stirred awake. Blinking his eyes few times, getting use to the bright light, he slowly turned his head. He sense your presence. His eyes met yours with a piercing look, you sense something wasn't quite right. There was no love, let alone recognition in his stare. You shrink back a little, feeling like a prey being assessed by its hunter. The next three words that came out from his mouth next made your heart shattered. " WHO are you."

[mahou-furbies]

Once again it is time for

This year's event will be hosted by mahou Zeldas, because I've been spending a lot of time in Hyrule this year.

Mahou anime of the year:

(Futari Wa Precure Splash Star, Yes! Precure 5, Yes! Precure 5 GoGo, Smile Precure!, Mahou Tsukai Precure!, Hirogaru Sky Precure!, Otona Precure, Tokyo Mew Mew New s2, Magical Destroyers, Zettai Bouei Leviathan, Petite Princess Yucie, season movies for Splash Star, Yes5, Yes5 GoGo, Smile & Delicious Party, Crossover movie for Fresh Precure!)

Then the stuff I read:

(Saint Tail, Stellar Witch Lips, Magical Girl Tsubame, W.i.t.c.h. reboot, Smile Precure novel, Null Magical Girl, Magia Record Scene Zero)

I also keep up with what kind of designs Magia Record releases though I don't play it or otherwise follow the story.

Extremely Precure year this time around though that was not intentional, usually I only manage one backlog season per year. But I started with Smile, and then we were hit with the news that we'd have a Yes5/Splash Star sequel in autumn, and in preparation for that I had to power through some 150 episodes for the original series. And then I somehow ended up watching all of Mahou Tsukai in less than 2 weeks. And then there was Otona as well of course.

Now there's only three backlog seasons left, and they should be doable in a year if the Mahou Tsukai sprint is of any indication, though we'll see how that goes. I'd like to take a look at other similar shows too (like Doremi and Sailor Moon) but I want to clear Precure first before moving to the next thing.

The W.i.t.c.h. reboot was also a thing this year, which seems to have come and went with a thud. Which is a shame because I was looking forward to it, but... well it wasn't particularly good. I guess it can pick up of there's more to the story.

For the first time I've followed a Magia Record (game) story, with Scene Zero. The format is difficult but I am interested, so it's possible I'll look into more MagiReco stories once Scene Zero is over. The game has so many cute characters so I'd certainly like to know more about them.

This year I also took part in ArtFight and did some mostly mahou themed OC art, which was a lot of fun. I'm looking forward to doing the same next year as well if they host the event again.

Now onto the awards!

Best henshin design goes to Cure Sky! Blue lead Cure aside this is a top tier magical girl design, and that is mostly thanks to the cape, especially the red inside and yellow fringe. It looks so majestic! But being a half-cape prevents her from looking too stuffy. The thin twintails also look great with the cape in action shots. And of course she is also stupidly cute.

Also a shoutout to Saint Tail's simple but very effective look with a rarely seen colour scheme.

Best team design goes to Stellar Witch Lips! Similar enough to be a team but everyone has their own take on the theme, black makes for a good base colour and the sparkly tops look amazing.

Best powerup design goes to Cure Felice's Alexandrite form! She looks so regal and powerful, truly a nature goddess!

Best civilian design goes to Cure Sky in general! I just like her practical style and the clothes look all comfy.

Best hair goes to Junia! It looks so soft and poofy and her pastel colour palette makes everything even cuter.

Best magical item goes to the tiara and amulets in Petite Princess Yucie! They aren't that special to be honest but I'm always ready for magical items that don't look like cheap plastic toys.

Best henshin scene goes to Cure Sky! A lot of dynamic animation, the tinted split screen at the end is fresh for Precure, the modulation in the middle amps up the power, the dark background makes everything a little bit cooler, and the cape flip and wings at the end just look amazing.

Best fan creation goes to ArtFight in general! It was my first time participating, and getting to draw other people's ocs on a low threshold was great, and obviously receiving a ton of art of my own ocs felt amazing.

Best relationship goes to the group in Petite Princess Yucie! I really like how the side characters have distinct relationships with each other and not just the main character, and how not everyone gets along all the time (or most of the time with Glenda and Elmina). The fact that they're also rivals makes things more interesting and everything culminates successfully in the power of friendship in the end.

Best mascot goes to Saki's cat Korone! Not exactly a traditional Precure mascot but he does become more mascot-like towards the end. Absolute unit of a cat, gets a funny deep voice and even lands a hit on the final boss, and most importantly isn't annoying.

Best supporting character goes to Kintoleski from Splash Star! He's a pretty simple character but I like villains who are honourable and polite, and he managed to be consistently funny as well.

Best visual goes to Stellar Witch Lips! The story wasn't really anything to write home about but the ultra cute and sparkly art is just magical.

Best audio goes to Updradft Shining bgm! It's surprisingly epic for such an early series attack and it'd be cool if the franchise used music like this more.

A honourable mention to Tsubasa's eagle sound effect in the Majestic Halation attack, Mabayu's (MagiReco) silly "nuwawawa" scream of pain in a decidedly serious scene, and every "Haa!" from Ha-chan.

Best scene goes to the separation and reunion scene from Mahou Tsukai Precure! Or I guess that's more like half of an episode. Really impressive how they spent so much time on pretty low-key character stuff like this.

Honourable mention to the big battle towards the end of Petite Princess Yucie.

The Innovation award is given to a magical girl work that I think does something fresh for the genre. This year it goes to Hirogaru Sky! Precure for having a boy Cure, an adult Cure and most importantly a non-pink lead Cure! Which isn't particularly notable for the genre as a whole but a gigantic achievement for this franchise. Hopefully it wasn't just a 20 year celebratory fluke and we'll see more variety in the future too.

The Golden Mana award is the prize given to one thing I didn't like.

This year it goes to the henshin forms in Otona Precure, or more specifically the way it did absolutely nothing about them. No adults-as-magical girls, no new looks as 14-year-olds, and not even a new powerup form for the final finisher. Boo! I'm not really saying that the show is required to include new forms just because I wanted it or because it's common in the genre, but that would definitely have made me a lot more forgiving of its many other flaws. And this is my list so I get to complain about my preferences.

Dishonourable mention to Nozomi's catchphrase in Yes5 and GoGo for exemplifying the selfish and pushy aspect of pink heroines like this that often goes uncriticised.

Best character goes to Cure Sky! In addition to the excellent character design she also has a fun personality, "earnest dumbass" is a great combo, and her determination is just great. I also like that she isn't super girly for once. The story of Hirogaru isn't that good so Sora too is held back from having a truly awesome story, but as a character she is still enjoyable enough.

Best work goes to Petite Princess Yucie! It has fun characters, great designs, good group dynamics, interesting world and a really strong ending. It's a shame they don't seem to do kids' anime like this nowadays?

Plans for 2024

Onwards to 2024! I swear this year I'm going to continue with MagiPro, I've been stuck at volume 7 for several years.

[roseofithaca]

Gotta vent my frustrations with that finale because holy fuck. If you don't want negativity then don't click the cut.

So far I've been praising this series for drifting away from one of my biggest gripes with the show and that's the oversaturation of romantic couples over found family and friendships. That hasn't been much of an issue this series, I've loved all the little moments of comradery, for example how it was Isaac and Sam who came to talk to Hetty after her reveal rather than Trevor, as well as Sas bonding with Jay even if just for that one episode. I liked Flower's polyamory being brought up again and had hopes it wouldn't just be mocked again....we'll get to that.

But then this last episode decided to leave me with such a vile taste in my mouth I dunno if I'm gonna bother watching more.

First off I'm not a big Isaac and Nigel shipper so it's not like I'm super devastated they didn't get married but I thought they were cute enough. I praised the show before about having an on screen gay couple as opposed to the typical tragic bury your gays of Caphavers, even if they didn't have nearly as much chemistry as the couple who have three scenes together.

But now Nisaac is dead, or on a respite (OK that made me giggle), and we didn't even get to see them have their emotional talk, just have Isaac sum it up afterwards. The show had an opportunity for a really heartbreaking moment with just the two of them but instead we were left with "He took it well". And Isaac has been dragged into the mud which, I'll admit, was incredibly cathartic on behalf of the basement ghosts and Nancy in particular.

Honestly it's the Thor/Flower/Nancy stuff that angers me the most and had it not been there then I might not have brought up what happened with Nisaac, but it just adds into the whole "queerphobic" narrative by having your mlm couple split while the mlw couple admits their love and another random mlw couple gets their wedding (one half of which is a horrible character). I knew the throuple thing wasn't going to be long term but....why bring it in at all? Just to mock poly people? Why not just have Flower say she needed space to think before being with Thor again? Why the need to mock Nancy as the "disposable unconventionally attractive" third wheel?

As for Flower...talk about character assassination. So last week she's all "how dare you be so cruel to Nancy?" and in the premier the basement ghosts are saying how kind she was to them - now she's abandoning Nancy in the basement and doesn't care that Nisaac didn't invite them - yet Carol was there?! Flower is the only other queer main ghost besides Isaac yet her wlw relationships are treated as jokes of her being a "silly hippy" and apparently she wasn't into Nancy at all? That's that for the only wlw rep in the show I guess. It doesn't help that Thor and Flower have zero chemistry imo.

I'm not gonna pretend the main guys in the BBC show treated the plague ghosts that great but at least they were invited upstairs to watch the panto. Again the thing with Patience was the only saving grace and I like that the guys had no idea she would do that so they're not painted as evil.

As for Pete's subplot, I actually did like Donna and was glad she didn't turn out to be some femme fatal like she was coming off as. But again, we have yet another mlw romantic subplot - when instead we could have had Pete with his daughter and her family and having the same dilemma of if he wanted to disappear there or return to his new 'home'.

Not to mention how irrelevant Sam and Jay felt to the point I forgot they were even there. All previous finales have had some sort of stakes going on with them whether it be the floor collapsing or the fake cousin, but here they were barely spectators.

I think worst of all, it just wasn't that funny. Often I can forgive a comedy's writing so long as it still makes me laugh but I got nothing from this other than disgust. Maybe my feelings will cool by the time S4 rolls around but I can't see myself wanting more of this show.

[thethistlegirlwrites]

What are some common elements of stories you are tired of seeing? What would you avoid writing about?

What themes would you like to write about that you feel don’t get explored very often?

Favorite dialogue in your wip? (If asked more than once, respond with a new piece each time)

What is some of the best writing advice you’ve read or received? Why does it work for you?

How do you come up with character names? Do the names have a special meaning? If so, what are they?

What writers have inspired you with their use of language? What are some of your favorite quotes?

Thank you for the ask!

What are some common elements of stories you are tired of seeing? What would you avoid writing about?

Oh boy, you really know how to ask them...at this point I guess the thing I'm most done with is 'special' characters who have some kind of magical power that makes them the chosen one. That and the 'strong' female characters who do things that male characters would never get away with and are praised for it. I have ZERO problem with morally grey female characters *cough cough Emma, Sierra, even Maira to some extent* but I want the complexities and fallout of their choices to at least be as realistic as someone would demand from a male character.

What themes would you like to write about that you feel don’t get explored very often?

I will NEVER get enough found family, in whatever way shape or form it arrives. It's becoming more common in books now, but I still want more. Redemption arcs that are meaningful explorations of change and based in more than just a 'I pulled your pigtails because I love you' kind of explanation. And a WHOLE lot more stories that play with characters' internal hypocrisies and ask the reader to consider if maybe they share some of the same.

Favorite dialogue in your wip? (If asked more than once, respond with a new piece each time)

“Magic is stronger near the rifts, but it also remembers what it lost. There is bitterness in it now, and it passes that pain on to its wielder.”

What is some of the best writing advice you’ve read or received? Why does it work for you?

Print your entire first draft, or at least pull it up in a split screen window next to a blank document, and fully rewrite the second draft. It forces me to think through every single word choice and every bit of the action, and I don't feel bound to what is already there like I would if I was editing the document with words already in it.

How do you come up with character names? Do the names have a special meaning? If so, what are they?

Sometimes, they just sound good. Occasionally, there's a meaning, either an in-joke to myself about where the character originated or the literal meaning of the name itself, but most of the time they just pop into my head as the 'right' sound for the character. The right names are essential to me being able to write a character well, I have to have one for them or the story won't be able to start.

What writers have inspired you with their use of language? What are some of your favorite quotes?

I tend to pull out themes more so than the ways writers use their words (notable exception, the time I read Nicholas Nickelby in three days and then everything I wrote sounded Dickensian for a week), but I remember a quote from the book "Gilead" by Marilynne Robinson absolutely destroying me when I read it in college. Something about ash, maybe, all I know is I was crying on my bunk an hour before a class started.

Possibly it's this one but I'm not entirely sure. “It has seemed to me sometimes as though the Lord breathes on this poor gray ember of Creation and it turns to radiance - for a moment or a year or the span of a life. And then it sinks back into itself again, and to look at it no one would know it had anything to do with fire, or light .... Wherever you turn your eyes the world can shine like transfiguration. You don't have to bring a thing to it except a little willingness to see. Only, who could have the courage to see it? .... Theologians talk about a prevenient grace that precedes grace itself and allows us to accept it. I think there must also be a prevenient courage that allows us to be brave - that is, to acknowledge that there is more beauty than our eyes can bear, that precious things have been put into our hands and to do nothing to honor them is to do great harm.”

From this ask game!

[mariacallous]

Over the past two weeks, Chinese President Xi Jinping has been holding court for visiting European dignitaries. In late March, Spanish Prime Minister Pedro Sánchez was the first European statesman to meet the Chinese leader after his summit with Russian President Vladimir Putin in Moscow. French President Emmanuel Macron followed last week together with EU Commission President Ursula von der Leyen. The only winner from these visits is Xi. Not only did he not make any concession on any issue vital to European interests, from Russia’s war to economic relations, his European visitors treated Xi to a display of European and transatlantic disunity serving the Chinese leader a major strategic objective on a silver platter and leaving Europe’s China policy in disarray.

It was not supposed to be this way. The plan of European leaders was a good one in theory. They wanted to take advantage of reopening after the end of China’s “zero-COVID” regime and personally press important concerns with Xi, in particular Russia’s war. Macron had invited von der Leyen to join him in Beijing to celebrate European unity and met her for a preparatory lunch in Paris before the trip. The French president clearly seemed to want to signal that he is a more committed European than German Chancellor Olaf Scholz, who had embarked on a solo trip to Beijing in November 2022, after rejecting Macron’s offer to go together. Von der Leyen had done her part to signal a determined European approach.

On March 30 in Brussels, she gave the boldest speech of any senior European decision-maker yet on how to deal with Xi’s China. The very fact that the EU Commission president chose to invite Berlin-based Merics, Europe’s leading think tank on China that had been put under sanctions by the Chinese party-state in 2021, sent a clear message to Beijing. The speech itself was even clearer. Von der Leyen depicts a China that is “more repressive at home and more assertive abroad” where security and control trump all other concerns and that is quick to use political and economic coercion trying to exploit the very dependencies of other countries on China that it systematically seeks to encourage. She described a country that Xi prepares for a long-term violent “struggle” with the United States and that has the “clear goal” of “systemic change of the international order with China at its center.”

To prove her point, von der Leyen added that the recent “show of friendship in Moscow” says “a thousand words about this new vision for an international order.” No other European leader had ever presented such an accurate dissection of Xi’s agenda. As a European response, von der Leyen outlined an ambitious “de-risking” strategy that puts economic security at the center of the relationship with Beijing and includes an instrument for outbound investment screening in technologically sensitive areas. Just as in 2019 when it introduced the notion of China as a “systemic rival” the EU Commission had again pushed the boundaries of Europe’s China policy. But straight away, China’s EU ambassador, Fu Cong, voiced doubts whether most member states were ready for von der Leyen’s agenda. For him, it sounded like “two people quarrelling with each other,” he told the New York Times, meaning “Europe has not formulated a coherent policy toward China.”

Both Sánchez and Macron worked very hard during their China trips to prove Fu right. In a speech at the Boao Forum, China’s version of Davos, the Spanish prime minister praised China for its belief in “a strong, transparent, and rules-based multilateral system,” directly contradicting what von der Leyen had said about Beijing’s vision for international order.

Given France’s status as a permanent member of the United Nations and Europe’s second-most important economic power, Macron could have offset these remarks by clearly aligning himself von den der Leyen’s de-risking agenda. The French president instead chose to do his utmost to pull the rug from under von der Leyen’s feet during their joint visit in Beijing. Instead of de-risking, Macron firmly stuck to illusions of reciprocity in economic relations with China, as if he learned nothing from the previous instances that he had pursued this approach only to find Beijing did not deliver. On Russia, Macron did not manage to extract any commitments that substantively go beyond the statement against the use of nuclear weapons that Scholz got from Xi in November. That is not surprising given Xi’s determination to stand by Putin’s side to keep Russia as an ally in the struggle against the United States.

But it is not that Macron tried very hard to signal that Beijing’s support for Russia’s war violates a European “core interest,” to use a favorite term of the Chinese Communist Party. Macron brought a 50-strong business delegation, four times the size of Scholz’s delegation in November for which he was criticized. Macron’s delegation included a member of the board of directors of Huawei France and former Prime Minister Jean-Pierre Raffarin, who is the French equivalent to Gerhard Schröder selling out to both Russian and Chinese interests. That is anything but a signal that because of the support for Russia’s war it is no longer business as usual in EU-China relations.

But it is on Taiwan policy where Macron chose to cause the most damage. When asked in Beijing on the meeting between Taiwanese President Tsai Ing-wen and U.S. House Speaker Kevin McCarthy, Macron coined the heroic formula: “I am neither Taiwan nor the U.S. As a good stoic, I can only deal with what depends on me. One does not have to mix up everything.” That was his only major statement on stability in the Taiwan Strait on the ground in China. It flew in the face of von der Leyen’s statement in Beijing vis-à-vis Xi that “stability in the Taiwan Strait is of paramount importance” and that “threat of use of force to change the status quo is unacceptable.” But Macron was not done yet. Just after the farewell fireworks Macron received before taking off, the People’s Liberation Army started a series of aggressive drills of “sharpening the sword” by encircling Taiwan as a reaction to the meeting between Ing-wen and McCarthy. On the plane ride back, Macron gave an interview to Politico Europe and Les Echos that amounted to a carte blanche for Xi on Taiwan. Macron described Taiwan as a “crisis that is not ours” that Europeans should stay out of and not be “America’s followers.”

The will of the majority of the Taiwanese people, expressed in democratic elections, not to be ruled by Beijing does not feature in his thinking. Despite Xi having made clear his determination to control Taiwan with ever more aggressive acts, Macron seemed to make the United States solely responsible for the ratcheting up of tensions in the Taiwan Strait. Macron seems to foolishly presume that Europe can insulate itself from a war between China, Taiwan, and the United States and therefore does not need to even try to deter Beijing from using force. But a Europe that cannot even deal with a much smaller war on its doorstep without U.S. help has no way of escaping the much larger consequences of a U.S.-China war. He undermines French credibility by going against key G-7 statements on Taiwan (most recently in August 2022) that France signed.

Perhaps most disconcerting is that Macron seems to lack any positive definition of the French national interest and strategic objectives on stability in the Taiwan Strait beyond not simply following the United States. His much-trumpeted approach of France as puissance d’équilibres, or “balancing power,” seems to be one of exclusively balancing against the United States. The irony is that Macron is right that Europe needs to chart its own course on China based on its own interests and invest in its own capabilities to achieve what he calls “European sovereignty.” But by presenting his approach as a purely anti-U.S. agenda, he discredited the “European sovereignty” approach even further in the eyes of many, especially in Central and Eastern Europe who were already skeptical before. A divided Europe only benefits Europe’s enemies.

That is why it is now crucial for Europe to shift to damage control mode. However self-defeating and provocative Macron’s remarks were, there is no point for other European leaders to add fuel to the fire of public debate. Rather, they should calmly restate the key principles on Taiwan outlined in G-7 statements also signed by the EU. At the same time, they should push the debate back to engaging with von der Leyen’s de-risking agenda. A majority of EU members is open to spelling out a “de-risking, not decoupling” agenda with China. Germany plays a key role on fronts. In November, Scholz was clear in the press conference on both Taiwan and human rights, including Xinjiang, not being internal Chinese matters. According to a German diplomat, Scholz delivered an “incredibly clear” message to Xi about the consequences of using force against Taiwan for the bilateral economic relationship. Scholz and Baerbock need to try to get the rest of Europe quietly behind such an agenda of deterrence against Beijing over Taiwan. Scholz himself has used the term “de-risking” vis-à-vis China, although he does not seem to want to move as decisively as von der Leyen on some fronts.

Building a coherent EU China policy on de-risking got much harder after Macron’s dismal China trip. But it is the only way for Europe to assert, in Macron’s term, its “sovereignty.” Baerbock should find ways to publicly back this de-risking agenda as well as the G-7 and EU position on Taiwan during her trip to Beijing. But let us not hold our breath this will impress Xi very much. As long as he can count on Macron as his best ally against a sovereign Europe asserting its interests vis-á-vis an aggressive Beijing, he will simply sit back, relax, and enjoy the show.

[soulsow]

textual frustration

words: 1581 rating: e (18+ readers only)

this one is inspired by the "would your wol take nudes" wolqotd. sorry about it. a few things to note: sam is left handed and this is set in me and egg's university AU!

It hadn’t started out as a particularly remarkable evening by any means, but Sam had been learning a lot—and not from the textbooks that sat forgotten on his desk across the room, shrouded by the darkness that extended past the piercing glow of his cell phone screen.

First off, he learned that sexting felt super weird (and a little embarrassing to start) but also felt super good, if the stiffness between his legs was anything to go off of. Euphie seemed to be into it too, unless she was lying about what his words were doing to her—but what reason would she have to lie?

Normally instead of texting all the things they wanted to do to each other they’d just actually do those things, but Sam had been insistent they spend a few evenings apart as finals week was rapidly approaching. Clearly his plan to study quickly went out the window as he was in bed with one hand on his phone and the other on his cock, too wrapped up in his budding sexual frustration to focus on study guides and notes.

Secondly, Sam learned that sometimes girls do want dick pics.

He’d never sent one before. Sure, he could be oblivious sometimes, but he wasn’t that stupid. Anyone who existed in this day and age knew that unprovoked photos of penises were almost always looked down upon. Besides, until just an hour ago he’d never sexted! He’d never had a valid reason to even think about taking a picture of his dick until now, as he looked back and read and reread the last couple texts he and Euphie had exchanged.

Euphie 💖: are you as turned on as i am right now?

im texting with my right hand…does that answer ur question lol?

Euphie 💖: show me~

He wasn’t about to leave her wanting, though. Kicking the blanket down a bit and pulling his erection fully out of his boxers, Sam aimed the phone in the general direction of his groin and tapped the camera button. The flash went off and the camera app clicked and Sam was presented with…probably the worst picture anyone could have taken of a dick in their life.

Sam didn’t really think that penises looked great to begin with, but this photo (blurry and washed out due to the flash, no less) was doing his member zero favors. Making a slight face at how ugly that first attempt was, he deleted it and pondered for just a moment before pulling up the web browser app on his phone next.

“How to take a good dick pic” wasn’t something Sam thought he’d ever have to Google, but here he was doing just that. Too much reading would make the boner go away, though, so he skimmed a few articles (and went through his texts with Euphie again to harden back up) before trying again.

Reaching over, he turned on the lamp on his bedside table, squinting as his eyes adjusted to the warm light that filled his corner of the room. The blanket was fully pushed to the end of his bed and his boxers followed suit, his t-shirt pulled up to expose his stomach and the happy little trail of hair that climbed from the base of his cock to his belly button.

Speaking of bases of cocks, that’s where one of his hands settled, holding his member up at what he hoped was a more appealing angle than almost laying flat against his body. With all the pieces in place all that was left to do was take the picture—making sure the flash was off this time.

The final product was better than the first, though it was still a little blurry, but maybe it just looked…artistic? Sam wasn’t good at these kinds of things and Euphie knew that, so he assumed she knew what she was getting into when she asked for a nude picture from him.

Attaching the photo to his next message he typed a quick message and hit send.

sorry that took a sec, idk how to take dick pics lol

The typing bubble showed up and for a split second, Sam was awash with an unfamiliar anxiety. They’d seen each other naked plenty of times and Euphie always told him how attracted she was to him, but maybe the picture wasn’t what she was expecting. Maybe she didn’t actually want a nude? His mind raced for a moment until her message finally popped up on screen.

Euphie 💖: oh my god sammie that’s so hot

The anxiety washed away and he was left with an incredibly strange sense of pride, though his face felt a bit flushed. It was a little embarrassing to keep seeing the picture of his own penis on the screen followed by her praise, though he didn’t have a chance to reply before the screen was filled with a photo from Euphie this time.

They had seen each other naked before, many times—but that didn’t stop a pang of need from coursing through him when he saw Euphie’s nude form on his phone screen, the hand that wasn’t holding her phone buried between her legs. His hips thrust forward almost involuntarily before he began to pump his left hand up and down his length again while his right fumbled as he attempted to text back.

fuck

so r u

Not poetry in the slightest, but Sam tended to get a bit of a one-track mind the closer he got to climaxing. Pulling his hand back for just a moment he spit in it (not a moment he’d be proud of in his future post-nut clarity) and continued to jerk off, trying to pretend the wetness from his own saliva could even compare to what it’d feel like to be inside of his girlfriend right now.

Euphie 💖: i wish you were here sammie

my fingers and toys dont feel as good as you

His eyes kept retracing her words as he continued to pleasure himself, thinking about how Euphie was doing the same, yearning for him as much as he wanted her in this moment. Scrolling back up a few messages his eyes locked onto the picture she’d sent, feeling that familiar tension building in his core.

euph im guna cum

(He didn’t care much about typos right now.)

It took only a split second before another series of text messages from Euphie showed up on screen.

Euphie 💖: show me

please

Slowing his hand for just a second he managed to pull open the camera app once more and flick the output to ‘video’ instead of ‘photo,’ hitting record just moments before he finished. Angles and lighting and whatever else be damned, he didn’t have time to try and make this aesthetic.

With one hand on his dick and the other on his phone Sam couldn’t suppress the sound that escaped him when he came, something between a whine and a growl that rumbled in his throat and devolved into heavy panting. As the orgasm faded and the last spurt of cum landed on his stomach, he stopped recording and sent her the video before he could get shy and second guess himself.

It took a bit for Euphie to respond, and it wasn’t with text but a video of her own. It was too dark to see much of anything but there were two things he could certainly hear—Euphie breathing his name over and over and the undeniable wet sounds of a very aroused woman touching herself.

If that wasn’t enough to get him horny again, the sounds she made as she approached and hit her own orgasm certainly were. Sam couldn’t help but play the video a few more times, relishing the sound of his name on her lips as she came. The video was interrupted by a new incoming text, however.

Euphie 💖: i just want you to know i came again but it happened so fast i couldnt record it for you

if it was anything like the one you sent me then i bet ur feeling really good

Euphie 💖: im still shaky and quivery sooo yeah. feeling amazing right now 💗

god dammit euphie, that was so hot im gonna get hard again and u kno i can only cum once lol

Sam was trying to will his rebound erection away to little success. Falling asleep after all this was going to be next to impossible, he just knew it.

Euphie 💖: heehee 😁 sorry sammieee~ guess you’ll just have to take care of it in the morning

might have to skip morning class and have you help me with that

Euphie 💖: what about getting ready for finals, huh??

yeah, because i did SO much of that tonight lol

Reaching over, Sam grabbed a handful of tissues to clean himself off before turning the lamp off and pulling the sheets up over himself once more (the tissues would be properly disposed of after getting up in the morning…probably). The banner across the top of his phone screen read 2 a.m.—definitely later than he wanted to stay up, but the warmth of love and satisfaction that filled the spots in his chest vacated by desire and lust just moments prior made it all worth it.

(And the thought of seeing Euphie in the morning to finish off what they’d started over text. That made it worth it too.)

[lurkiestvoid]

So I haven't really said anything about this to anyone except my wife yet because I'm a notorious flake and 'tell ppl abt ur projects so u feel compelled to finish them' has the opposite effect on me and I didn't wanna jinx myself

But anyways, unimportant but still newsy: a Project of mine is shaping up into something kinda cool.

For the last two months I have been working on a tightly-knit series of Dragon Age fics that spans all my Heroes and companions over a minimum of 25 years, intricately weaving a custom world state, with prologues and drabbles and everything else I want in my personal canon, leading up to and including Veilguard (once I get my hands on it, anyway -- I have a decent outline for it already though) and beyond. I've been doing it for myself, but I'm having so much fun I wanna throw it up on AO3 when it's polished a bit.

I have never done anything like this before nor gotten so far into it so I'm really psyched about it! I've written fic, sure, and gotten decent reception, but it's been rare and tiny; I've written original fic, but usually got stuck a few chapters in and abandoned it. This shit is coming out sideways as one whole entire baby and it is as surprising as it is painfully life-changing.

More about The Project under the cut.

The Prologues fic will cover everyone pre-Origins, eventually, or later/younger characters before their official appearances. Then, there are four Main Fics, one for each O/2/I/V, I haven't yet decided if I'll split them up or run it as the massive interconnected beast it really is. ...I also have some derivative 'original' fic loosely planned for after a 100+yr time skip but that's separate There will certainly be plenty of smut in a variety of combinations and relationships, buuuut I think I'm going to post all that together as its own separate semi-canon drabbles fic just to keep things tidy and because I do have a kid who is soon to be unleashed on the internet who is already begging for AO3 i might post it under a secondary account

There will be many playlists.

General idea: The world of Thedas and both major and minor plotlines become massively but reasonably Changed by player choices, character deaths, character survivals, and by continual involvement of the Heroes and their companions and allies, in some form or fashion. 'Alternative' player-character Wardens/Inquisitors/Rooks survive the character creator screen, at least for a while. Chapters mostly explore the "in between" scenes of relationships, personal and interpersonal growth, shenanigans, minor events and conflicts, the intricacies of sociopolitics, processing the Horrors, and with major/familiar plot points told from interesting perspectives or other changes, or skimmed for brevity. No "party sizes" we adventure as a group, occasionally splitting into teams to delegate or pinch; this, too, changes some things. Filling in plot/lore holes and probably making new ones, but all for fun. And because Bioware is fucking terrified of children, apparently (I refuse to believe virtually zero children have any affect on half a century of history or really any lore at all, nor that 60%+ of all the Big Names aren't constantly fucking nasty style throughout the halls of power and the alley slums alike) there will be plenty of kids running around and mucking things up for everyone, adorably or otherwise, and explorations of tons of different family types. (Kieran matters again. So does Feynriel, and Connor, and the like 2-3 other kids we ever see across games. Now plus gaggles of baby OCs, sprinkled throughout)

Total rough-draft notes word count is currently sitting over 300k. My "notes" generally consist of bulleted list summaries and quick word-vomit snippets while sitting in traffic so I don't forget ideas, and a few 3k-12k rough draft chapters. I recently moved into my first major editing phase, which will take a few weeks, then I'll do a second writing phase to fill in gaps, straighten out details, rewrite scenes, etc, and a second editing phase where I repeatedly reread and hunt typos/dangling participles/whatever. And then I'll start feeding it chronologically to AO3, one chapter at a time, once a week for like a whole fucking year or three

It's... uh, big. Big project. Massive. Why am I doing it? I don't know but I am VISCERALLY COMPELLED to do this, I have not been in control of my actions for like two months and the consistent high rate at which this has poured out of me has been MIND-BOGGLING to experience. I have been possessed by whichever spirit of Inspiration finally gave up on George R R Martin, is my best guess. But hey, if it works, which is seems to be working VERY FUCKING WELL, I'm going to use this exact formula to plow through years of abandoned novel ideas.

OH AND I'm going to be doing fanart the whole time, both of canon and fanon characters. Dustin off the lil Wacom and getting back to work. I'm going to start taking commissions again also (not just yet) and maybe start a BlueSky for that I guess. So, uh. Yay productivity? But if anyone is interested in beta reading or has art requests, hit me up and I'll start putting out sometime probably after xmas lol

[bllsbailey]

Trump Declares Victory in Wake of Biden 'Disaster,' Dems Panic

Donald Trump made it appear obvious to America: President Joe Biden cannot stand next to him on a debate stage without a "disaster," Democrats and leftist media sources were forced to admit Thursday night after the earliest debate in presidential history.

The Trump campaign messages blared "It's So Joe-Over" and "Crooked Joe Biden's Horrible, Humiliating Night," and Friday outlined the reaction from several mainstream reporters, saying that the reaction "speaks for itself."

NBC's Kristen Welker: "There's widespread panic among Democrats."

NBC's Chuck Todd: "Biden looks like the caricature that conservative media has been painting ... you saw it before your eyes!"

CNN's Chris Wallace: "This has been, quite frankly, a car accident in slow motion."

CNN's Abby Phillip: "The panic that I'm hearing from Democrats is not like anything I've heard in this campaign so far."

MSNBC's Nicolle Wallace: "What was wrong with [Biden]?"

In a second memo about the debate, the campaign declared that the American people "witnessed a split screen for the ages — a strong, focused, and powerful performance from President Donald J. Trump and an incoherent, humiliating, and embarrassing display of Crooked Joe Biden's weakness and decline.

Some "must-watch moments," the campaign said, included:

Crooked Joe Biden took zero responsibility for the millions of illegal aliens he has ferried into the country — and even credited them as "the reason why we have the most successful economy in the world."

Crooked Joe Biden blamed President Trump for his own historic inflation crisis.

Crooked Joe Biden admitted he has NO PLAN for Social Security.

Crooked Joe Biden lied about raising taxes on middle-class Americans.

Crooked Joe Biden was unable to name a single limit he'd support on taxpayer-funded abortion-on-demand until birth.

Crooked Joe Biden malfunctioned in real-time (again, and again, and again, and again).

"Meanwhile, President Trump took Crooked Joe Biden to task over Biden's border invasion, his disastrous foreign policy, his plan to raise taxes on 91% of American families, and his lifetime of chronic lying," the campaign said. "There's a reason two-thirds of Americans say President Trump was the clear winner of tonight's debate — because he was."

The debate left many in the left-wing media shaken, including CNN analyst John King, who commented minutes after the debate ended that "there is a deep, a wide, and a very aggressive panic in the Democratic Party."

The campaign, declaring victory, said that Trump "delivered the greatest debate performance and victory in history to the largest voter audience in history, making clear exactly how he will improve the lives of every American."

In its statement, the campaign commented that Trump "over and over" again "highlighted common-sense plans to reduce inflation, bringing down the costs of groceries, housing, and gas, as well as his plans to bring back his successful first-term policies that kept our southern border secure and free from the wave of Biden migrant crimes currently sweeping our country."

Biden, on the other hand, "showed exactly why he deserves to be fired," the campaign said. "Despite taking a week-long vacation at Camp David to prepare for the debate, Biden was unable to defend his disastrous record on the economy and the border. Throughout the debate, Biden lied, invented stories, and could not articulate a single plan to make things less expensive and keep our people safe, choosing instead to change the subject and dwell on the past."

Even worse, the campaign declared, "Biden couldn't explain why he took a week of vacation at Camp David while 50 ISIS terrorists ran loose in our country. President Trump is spot-on when he says that if Joe Biden is too incompetent to stand trial, then Biden is too incompetent to be president."

Meanwhile, "Americans are struggling financially while the families of Laken Riley, Rachel Morin, Jocelyn Nungaray, and every other victim of Biden Migrant Crime are grieving," the campaign said. "Our country is on fire at home and we stand on the brink of World War III because of Joe Biden's incompetence. But we can turn it all around, and bring back the American Dream, starting on day one, by reelecting President Donald J. Trump.

Sandy Fitzgerald ✉

Sandy Fitzgerald has more than three decades in journalism and serves as a general assignment writer for Newsmax covering news, media, and politics. 

© 2024 Newsmax. All rights reserved.

[thesmolgoblingf]

Gobbo’s Goals 2024

Balance my budget on a zero-dollar method that accounts for enjoying life but also creating an emergency fund. 💰

Establish and follow a care plan with my healthcare providers to improve my mental and physical health. 🩺

Explore the Curly Girl Method more in depth for better methods taking care of my wave pattern. 👩‍🦱

Eliminate heat, bleach, and hair dye from my haircare routine to help promote better scalp health. 💆‍♀️

Get regular trims to keep unsightly split-ends from becoming frizz while promoting healthy growth. 💇‍♀️

Continue to treat my nails to make them long and strong while keeping them clean and a manageable length. 💅

Write my weekly affirmations in cursive every day; once on Mondays, twice on Tuesdays, etc. ✍️

Write a poem for my partner every week. 📝

Squeeze in an hour of pleasure reading a week and finish a book a month; it doesn’t matter if it’s something I’ve read before, just that I’m taking the time to enjoy a physical book and getting a break from the screen. 📚

Read an article a week about homesteading, parenting, and/or marriage to prepare for my future. 🏡

Cook something new once a month; you can’t expand your cookbook or your palette by playing it safe! 👩‍🍳

Eliminate any debt and continue to build a good credit history. 💳

Continue to invest regularly in both my retirement and personal portfolios to build a nest egg. 📈

[beatricethecat2]

Bering & Wells: Screen Shot from "For the Team"

[ms-demeanor]

uh, if you think you are going to need a new computer in the next six months and you have money to buy it now, and you have been able to find it in stock someplace, go buy it now.

It is my actual, professional, real-life job to buy computers for businesses and right now that is basically impossible.

I found one computer that will kind-of work for someone who has been waiting on an order that WE'VE been waiting on from our vendor for a month and when I placed the order for that computer it was almost sold out. I don't even know if I'm going to get an email tomorrow saying that the order was cancelled due to stock imbalances.

Look at this:

My Lenovo rep sends me an inventory of what's in stock with the big resellers nationwide every two weeks. This shows that there were about 400 Lenovo Business desktops stocked through the whole of the US. There are normally at least a couple thousand split up among various vendors and part numbers.

This inventory is from a month ago, all of those part numbers are currently at approximately zero. When she sent me her inventory update last Friday it was all for chromebooks, no desktops or laptops.

I have to get monitors for an office, a total of 8. The main vendor I use was out of stock and so were two of the other ones I have accounts for, so I waited a couple days. I saw on Wednesday at 10am that the main vendor had 197 of the monitors in stock at $134 each. I went to place the order at 11am after I was out of the meeting and there were only 4 left in stock and they were at $158. I managed to find 8 monitors for my customer today, but they were not the models that matched the ones currently in her office and she had to choose between keeping the same price but getting monitors that need a converter and only having a one-year warranty OR getting the same brand (though a slightly different model) with the same inputs and the same warranty but paying $50 more per monitor.

It has been a pain in the ass to buy graphics equipment for years, and there have been ups and downs with HDDs and SSDs and RAM, but this is the biggest overall "everything computer related" shortage that I've seen and that includes the run on laptops last year and various other floods and disasters that have taken out big chunks of the supply chain.

SO my advice is to try to keep your current devices running as best you can, do some preventative maintenance and make some backups and make sure they aren't getting heat stressed.

If you can afford a computer right now and you think you'll need one and you've found one for a good price, go get it.

Black Friday/holiday sale computers are usually pretty crap but if you think you may need to get a computer at a discount, that's the time to look for one and now's the time to start saving for it. Just make sure you're getting a relatively new processor because a lot of people are unloading stuff with older processors at low prices because they won't be compatible with Windows 11.

RAM, HDDs, and SSDs are actually pretty stable at the moment so if you think you can get your computer to limp along for a while longer with an upgrade instead of a replacement, try that.

Remember: if you kill your laptop screen you can always plug it in to an external monitor, and if you kill the keyboard or trackpad you can plug in USB devices instead of using the built-in components. If your battery is dead but the computer still works when it's plugged in, you can often replace the battery cheaply. If your battery is swollen, remove the battery and discard it, but remember that you will likely still be able to use your computer when it is plugged in.

Try to take care of your tech and treat it gently for a while if you can; don't yank out cables, don't drop shit, don't keep drinks around your devices and if you have pets or if you smoke, consider opening up your device and cleaning up accumulated ash/dust/dander/hair etc.

[lena-in-a-red-dress]

Rojascorp. Andrea comes to Lena and confesses her feelings for Lena, and suggests the two just leave and live a happy peaceful life together. Something sweet between them, and maybe it ends with their new happy life, or we see them return to the city a year later and she the reactions of their old friends. Who some could be happy for them and some maybe jealous they missed their chance.

When Andrea comes seeking absolution, Lena initially resists. Kara may have ripped their friendship to shreds, but Andrea had cleaved Lena from what remained of her mother, and that could never be forgiven.

But then Lena visits Andrea at CatCo for an unrelated meeting, and she catches the look on Kara's face when she leans in to give Andrea's cheek a perfunctory kiss. Shock sparks when she sees Kara staring not just in curiosity, but something else. Jealosy, perhaps, she thinks. But then it hits her-- longing.

Kara Danvers looks at them with thinly veiled longing, and a plan starts to form in Lena's brain.

After their meeting concludes, Andrea walks Lena to the elevators. Lena feels gazes following them, and knows that Kara's is one of them. In a split second, Lena makes her choice.

Affecting a conciliatory smile, Lena reaches out with a gentle touch to Andrea's elbow. Her friend's surprise soon shifts to hope when she sees Lena's expression.

"I'm tired of being angry," Lena says quietly. She waits a bit, then meets Andrea's gaze. "I've missed you."

That much carries a kernel of truth, though her purpose in sharing as much is less than honest.

"Have dinner with me tonight," Andrea breathes in a rush.

Lena lifts her chin in acquiescence. "All right."

Andrea's fingers catch gently at hers when they part. Lena lets it happen, even throws a glance over her shoulder as she steps into the elevator. It reveals Andrea's subtly eager countenance, but also Kara's arched brows as her eyes zero in on their joined hands.

Only when the elevator doors close does Lena allow herself a smirk.

----

They share their first meal in years at a restaurant that is upscale enough to offer a modicum of privacy between tables, but not good enough to become a favorite of either of them. It's neutral territory.

Nothing is said about the medallion. Lena is more than happy to ignore the elephant between-- it's easier to pretend when neither of them acknowledges it. Instead they share gossip, catching each other up on what's transpired in their missing years together. Inevitably, Andrea teases her.

"And what about this Supergirl? I admit I've been following your escapades with National City's favorite superhero. You two seem... comfortable."

"Purely business," is all Lena says.

Andrea senses the end of the conversation, and smoothly moves on.

They part that evening outside the restaurant with a promise to text later. Within a week, they meet for lunch. Then, morning coffee before work. That morning, before Lena can slip back to L-Corp, Andrea's features suddenly turn nervous.

"Can I make you dinner at mine tomorrow?"

There's nothing that sounds more claustrophobic than an evening trapped with a former friend, but Lena forces a smile. "Sounds lovely."

Dinner is a simple pasta and red wine, followed by a dessert of chocolate raspberry torte. Conversation flows easily enough, and the mood slowly softens as the wine continues to pour. Eventually, Lena pulls out her phone to request her driver, only for Andrea to cover the screen with her hand, stilling Lena's typing fingers.

When Lena meets her gaze, Andrea's eyes are soft with wine, pupils wide with desire. Lena isn't surprised: she's been expecting this for some time-- a rekindling of the unspoken chemistry between them, without Russell around to pull Andrea's attention away.

"Stay," Andrea offers, voice low and throaty. She reaches up to cup Lena's cheek as she hopefully searches Lena's gaze. "Just for tonight."

Lena leans ever so slightly into her friend's touch, then loops her arms around Andrea's neck. "Just for tonight."

Leaning in, she allows their lips to meet.

---

Lena stays until morning. She leaves before Andrea, but lingers long enough to share coffee in the kitchen, clothed in nothing but one of Andrea's sweatshirts. It's large, even for Andrea, and Lena wonders detachedly whether the sweatshirt might have originally belonged to Russell.

Their texts throughout the day remain casual, but Lena makes a point to visit CatCo the next day. Andrea makes no indication of the change in their relationship, but Lena fixes that by kissing her square on the mouth. Gentle enough to be discreet, but sure enough to let anyone watching know.

And the one person Lena wants to have see is certainly watching.

A mug drops and shatters on the floor, echoed by a frantic yelp and censored 'shoot!'

Andrea blinks at Lena, stunned.

Lena slips a hand to Andrea's waist. The touch is intimate, and softens Andrea's shock to happiness.

"Hello, darling."

---

So it continues. Weeks pass, then over a month as Lena continues the charade of amends. It's as easy as breathing, even when Lena smoothly accepts Andrea's invitation to visit the Rojas home in Argentina.

It's there that Andrea surprises Lena with a question.

"Why are you here if you don't want to be anywhere near me?"

Lena's eyebrows lift. "Excuse me?"

"Come on, Lena. I know you, remember? The kiss, the dinners, the sex. We both know it's not for my benefit."

Caught on the spot-- on the sand, no less, spread out on a lounge chair beneath a broad umbrella-- Lena says nothing. They're as isolated as their affluence can afford them; she has nowhere to go but to endure the understanding in Andrea's voice.

"I'd hoped it might bring us closer, regardless your motives," Andrea continues. "I just want you to know that I know, and that I'm okay with it. There's been enough secrets between us."

With that, Andrea returns to her book. Lena scowls at her own book, nearly forgotten in her lap. Andrea's lack of judgement rankles her, poking the part of her just spoiling for a fight.

"I'm not going to forgive you."

Andrea's shoulders fall, but she doesn't rise to the bait.

"I'm not asking you to."

---

When they return from their trip, something has changed. No longer forced to pretend for Andrea's sake, Lena just... forgets to pretend.

The public kisses cease, the flirting stops, and though their dates continue, the tension Lena felt maintaining her deceit eases, and slowly she feels herself responding to Andrea's persisting presence.

Eventually, Lena realizes that her enjoyment in her friend's company is genuine. She looks forward to seeing Andrea-- her smiles when Andrea teases aren't forced.

One morning, waking in Andrea's bed, Lena realizes-- she's herself again. The part of her that had ruptured from Kara's betrayal has been stitched back together. She feels reassembled, glued piece by piece under Andrea's open affection.

Rolling over, Lena gazes at her friend's sleeping face, and discovers that Andrea is, in fact, her friend. Again. Without Lena knowing, Andrea has slipped back into her life, into her heart.

Most surprising of all is that Lena is okay with that.

---

"Kara," Lena hears Andrea say from outside her office. "I don't remember assigning you the L-Corp piece."

Lena can hear Kara's sheepishness in the beat of silence that follows. "I traded with Todd, actually. He... wasn't feeling well."

"I'm sure."

Taking pity on both of them, Lena rises from her desk and collects her things to leave. It's late enough to take an early afternoon, and honestly Lena doesn't mind that Andrea seems to be of a similar opinion.

She opens her office door to find Andrea regarding her employee with a skeptical look, but her expression eases into a smile at the sight of Lena.

"Hey, babe," Andrea greets. The affection is second-nature by now, just as it feels natural for Lena to accept it, just as she had in boarding school. Andrea catches sight of Lena's purse and grins. "Playing hooky?"

Lena returns the smile. "Something like that." She loops her arm through Andrea's, propping her chin on a satined shoulder. "Wouldn't mind some company."

An unprompted kiss drops onto Lena's hairline. "My thoughts exactly."

Having ignored Kara for a sufficient amount of time, Lena straightens and regards the reporter with none of the warmth she'd shown Andrea.

"Can I help you?"

Her tone is cool and professional, but Kara winces like Lena had stabbed her. A flood of emotions flashes behind Kara's glasses, before she manages to recover enough to respond.

"I, uh... I wanted to..."

"I'm afraid I have other business to attend to today," Lena dismisses casually. She even offers a detached, though courteous smile. "Let Todd know he's welcome to make an appointment with my office as soon as he's feeling better."

Turning back to Andrea, Lena waggles their interlocked elbows. "You ready?"

"You jump, I jump."

Together, they stride to the elevator, leaving Kara behind with her cheeks burning and tears in her eyes. With Andrea warmth behind her, the flickers of anger that sparked at the sight of her former friend quickly subside once more.

And if Lena kisses the corner of Andrea's mouth in gratitude, the responding kiss is anything but.

[jeongjaebae]

Heartbreak for hire

❥ Younghoon x reader, 12.8k | AO3 ❥ College AU, romance, fluff, bit of angst(???) ❥ Warnings: mentions of mature subjects, a tiny bit suggestive

❥ Breaking his heart would be easy. Figuring out why someone would want to do that, however, would be an entirely different story.

The first thing you notice is that he's handsome. The second is that there appears to be a lot of zeroes in the amount of money that arrives in your bank account along with this request.

It makes sense at first—the good-looking ones are always worth a ton of money. It's not easy to worm your way into their big circle of friends, and it's even harder to ensure that you're the one they fall for instead of one of the several others crushing on them. But when the request form comes in, you have to do a double take at what the description says.

Kim Younghoon, junior at Creker University. Tall, handsome, but... a bit of a loser.

"Chanhee, are you seeing this?"

Your roommate bends over to take a look at the screen from over your shoulder, narrowing his eyes at the tiny lines of words. A frown forms on his lips as he reads.

An outcast who doesn't have many friends, preferring to spend his time alone as he reads or writes poetry.

"Are you sure someone like him even exists?" Chanhee takes off his glasses and rubs his eyes. "They also don't state a reason for sending the request."

You shrug at him. "Not all of them do. I would assume it's the usual ex or someone who got rejected by him. Maybe he's a heartbreaker himself." Clicking on the picture of this Younghoon guy reveals that he's even more handsome in full screen than he was in the thumbnail. "He certainly has the looks to be one."

"Wait, is that his schedule attached?" He puts his hand on the mouse over your own and clicks the next attachment. "Whoa. Okay, whoever sent this in really wants their revenge, huh?"

"I guess this is going to be an interesting one."

"Alright," Chanhee stifles a yawn, "I'm off to bed. Show me what you have tomorrow, okay?"

"Yeah, of course." You nod at him before going to open a new document. And then, you begin to work on the plan.

Heartbreak for Hire. The red words stare back at you as you go to look at Younghoon's description again before you start jotting down a vague timeline. Chanhee had been the one to come up with the name of the website this time, seeing as he kept calling you 'a walking heartbreak waiting to happen.' Maybe it was time to change the name though. You'd have to ask him if any of the ones you brainstormed sounded good at all, even if you personally thought this was the best name it had in the past two years.

It hadn't even meant to be an official business—it only started in freshman year, when resident fuckboy Kim Sunwoo had broken Jiwon's heart only to go after yours right after. You'd used that chance to play around for a bit, mostly because you were curious about the mindset of a fuckboy, but you never predicted that he would actually fall for you. Chanhee had said you had an affinity for making people fall for you when you wanted them to, and Jiwon had been ecstatic that Sunwoo had finally been put in his place.

Then it became taking requests from some of Jiwon's friends. Star quarterback Juyeon had been left in tears, foodie Haknyeon had stopped going to his favourite restaurant that he'd taken you to, and gamer Hyunjae had quit spending his days at the internet cafe. You'd paid your tuition and rent comfortably and then split the rest with Chanhee when he built the site as a project for a computer science class.

Thus, Heartbreak for Hire had started.

***

The description wasn't exactly wrong. In the week that you've silently observed him for, he does exactly what the description said he would do. Younghoon sits alone during lecture, usually off to the side of the room, and he doesn't speak in class unless he's called on by the professor. In between classes, he's either visiting the student center for lunch or at the library. He sits alone at both places too, sometimes pulling out a book to keep him occupied and other times a little notebook where he writes stuff down. You'd never gotten close enough to actually see what he reads or writes, but it could very well be the poetry that the description form had mentioned.

Kim Younghoon was tall, handsome, and a bit of a recluse.

You sigh, jotting down the last of your plan as you tune out the professor droning on and on about some French book. The course didn't matter to you after all—you were simply auditing the class as part of your plan.

Younghoon sits a few rows in front of you, taking down notes in a fairly neat scrawl from what you could see. That didn't matter either though; this vantage point was only so that after class, you could start executing your perfect plan.

Three, two, one.

You trip on the steps of the lecture hall, bumping right into Younghoon as he walks out from his row after class. The impact makes you tumble a bit, which was a sacrifice that you'd have to make if this were to be realistic at all. So you end up on the floor along with your binder and the couple of notebooks he was holding.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" You give him an apologetic look. A bit of a pout, extra twinkle in the eyes. "These stairs are spaced so terribly, aren't they?"

He seems to freeze in place with a dazed look in his eyes as he stares back at you. Clears his throat softly before reaching for your binder, then proceeding to offer you a hand to help you up.

You quickly gather the notebooks on the ground before taking his hand. This part was entirely unplanned—you hadn't expected him to help you in any way, so this was going even better than you'd hoped for.

"Thanks," you flash a smile. Forty watts; bright but nothing crazy. "Oh, I believe these are yours."

He takes the notebooks from you and offers your binder in exchange. And there, you had your perfect opportunity to brush his hand just slightly when you reach for it. Younghoon gives you a stiff smile almost as if it's something he hadn't done in years, and then quickly leaves the room.

This was going to be a fun project.

You find him in class the next day—a different class this time, though he still sits in his typical spot midway and off to the side.

"Oh hey! Do you mind if I sit here? Sorry," you quickly add, putting on the harmless person pout, "it's just that transferring to a completely different major has been a rough time and—you're the only familiar face here."

You wouldn't be surprised if he says no, if he simply continues to sit there and stare at you before ignoring you entirely. But he doesn't do that. Younghoon moves his bag over to the seat on his other side, clearing the space for you beside him.

"Thanks." You give him little more than a forty watt smile this time.

"So," he starts quietly, though it takes you by surprise anyway. His voice is fairly low but a soft sort of timbre. "You just transferred into English?"

"Yeah. You know, biology wasn't really my thing."

He hums. "You do know that English isn't easy, right? It's not just bird courses and an easy way out."

Was he implying that you're stupid now?

"Of course not. I just wanted a challenge that wasn't biology." Fingers playing with your necklace. You look over to him to attempt some eye contact, but he doesn't look your way. It's hard to blame him though; these lecture seats are so close together that it's definitely weird to look at the person beside you. "But I guess judging by what you said, you must be so good at it."

The corner of his lip rises just slightly. "Depends on which of the profs you ask."

Then the lecture starts. You pull out your laptop and take some notes to make it look realistic even though they don't make much sense to you, but at least you could grasp that the professor was talking about one of Shakespeare's plays. Was this an entire course on Shakespeare? You'd have to check Younghoon's schedule again and see what each of his courses were.

"Wow, that was quite heavy for a first day." You give him a wry smile as you put away your stuff at the end of class.

Younghoon's expression doesn't change but you could see that there's a look of amusement in his eyes. "Yeah, you have a lot of catching up to do."

"Tell me about it," you chuckle. "I'll see you tomorrow?" Then you give him a small wave, with just enough hesitance, and another flash of the forty-watt smile before heading out of the lecture hall and back to your apartment.

You let out a breath of relief as soon as you're out of the vicinity. The acting wasn't exactly difficult, but it does take a toll on you when there was much more to remember than simply playing a role. You had to control each and every expression on your face as well as your actions to make yourself seem more attractive. To make yourself become someone worth falling for.

"So?" Chanhee looks up from where he sits on the couch, already a permanent part of the living room view you come home to. "Did you scope him out? Did you get a gauge of the difficulty?"

You roll your eyes at him. "My day was great, roommate, thank you for asking. How was yours?"

"I'm taking that as a good sign."

"Hmm, it's kind of hard to gauge right now." You set your bag down and settle in beside him on the couch. "He's tall and handsome, which you might think would make it difficult. Yet he's quiet and doesn't seem to have many friends, which might make it easy? But at the same time, he seems so guarded all the time that making him open up to the idea of love might be a challenge in itself."

Chanhee eyes you carefully and you could see the wheels turning in his sharp mind.

"What?"

"Nothing," he waves dismissingly, turning back to his laptop. "I'm sure it'll be just fine. Make yourself seem harmless and not so intimidating. Or whatever it is you do in these situations."

"Oh, let me tell you a story about that. I sat beside him in his lit class or whatever it was and told him about switching majors and all, and—you know what? He totally thinks I'm dumb." You have to wait for Chanhee to stop laughing before continuing. "He said something like 'this isn't going to be bird courses or an easy way out.' So yeah, I would say the plan is going quite well so far."

"Well, isn't that a good thing? This should be easy then."

"Yeah," you nod, "very easy."

***

The following week consists of time spent clinging onto Younghoon whenever you could. Not to the point where it would be creepy, obviously, but you played the role of a confused and helpless student in need of a tutor perfectly. And surprisingly enough, he was receptive to your attachment and was willing to help you catch up with the couple of courses you'd planted yourself in.

Soon your days began to consist of hours spent at the coffee shop analyzing pieces of literature. Sixty-watt smiles. Stops by the student center where you'd buy him food to make up for the time he spends tutoring you, which was really just a nice excuse to eat together. Playing with your earrings. Classes where he'd have his bag on the other side of him so that you could sit right beside him when you arrive if you weren't already walking to the lecture hall together. Subtle but intentional brushes of your hand against his.

"Have you taken any of the English courses from first or second year?" Younghoon asks, looking up from the book to peer at you.

"Um." You glance at the upper left corner of the room, as if trying to recall past memories. "Yeah, actually. I took a few courses as electives last year just to have some variety in my life."

Of course the story was all prepared in case it came up in conversations. You would have two courses with him, and the other three this term would be in lower-level English courses that you would have to catch up with. It was all a meticulously crafted lie—in reality, the rest of your time would be spent in your actual life of biology lectures and labs.

"Hmm, that would be helpful. Your graduation shouldn't be too delayed then." He hesitates a little before adding, "Why did you want to switch majors?"

"Well," you say slowly, dragging out the word so you can whip up some more of your little story. "Not all of us want to follow our parents' wishes for us to become doctors."

"Oh." Younghoon nods at your words, but you can see the way he bites his lip and looks away.

You quickly backtrack. "But anyway, I'm sure you can understand that it's important to live your life the way you want to."

"Yeah," he shrugs, "maybe you're right."

It becomes silent again when he turns back to the book, and you pretend to follow suit. Had you touched a nerve? You didn't know anything about his story other than what the request description had told you, but he already seemed different from all of your previous targets—there was definitely much more to him than meets the eye. It would be interesting to try to figure him out like putting pieces of a puzzle together.

When you glance at him again, Younghoon seems to have retreated into his head. His eyes may be gliding over the words silently, but it looks like he doesn't absorb much of the content. You hoped that this wasn't what you looked like every time you tried to read, but if it was, at least he hasn't called you out on it yet.

"You can say it, you know?"

He slowly blinks at you. "What?"

"Whatever it is on your mind. You don't have to hold back your thoughts."

"What, you want to hear what I think about this passage?" It comes out almost sarcastic as Younghoon gives you a strange look. Like he doesn't believe what you're saying.

You nod. "Yeah, if that's what you want to talk about. But I mean, if you want to say something outrageous about it then uh. Maybe don't do it in front of the prof," you chuckle. Shrug a little. "But it's fine here. It's just me."

"Oh. Yeah, I guess."

"So," you give him a warm smile, "tell me all about how stupid you think our main character is."

Slowly but surely, you can see the way he relaxes in front of you. With your carefree demeanor and poor attempts at humour, his initial hesitation gradually fades a little more with each turn of the page until he's comfortable enough with freely sharing his thoughts. He still maintains his distance like you knew he would, but you begin to get the sense that he really does want to open up to someone—at least in terms of the material you're studying together, you could feel that he wants to share his analyses of text and his opinions on each author's works. He wants someone to listen to his thoughts.

And listening to him makes you notice just how natural your role comes to you. You hadn't anticipated it to be easy when you'd have to pretend to like something you'd always found boring, but somehow the hours always fly by so quickly whenever you're with him. It makes you notice just how immersed you are in the role that it seems to become your new reality. You find yourself slowly becoming interested in the literary works you analyze with him, looking at them in a different light that allows you to appreciate them despite how you expected them to be putting you to sleep. Then there's the excitement in Younghoon's voice when he explains a passage or the twinkle in his eye when you answer a question correctly—somehow they motivate you to actually want to do better and to learn properly.

"Wait. You don't think it's crazy that Romeo and Juliet happened within a few days?" Younghoon peers at you incredulously over the book he's holding. "That they fell in love within one night?"

"Well, if you put it that way, just remember that Macbeth went from saying no to murder to being very enthusiastic about murder within one night."

He blinks at you, mouth slightly parted like he wants to say something, but nothing comes out.

"What?" you prompt, setting down your own book. "Are you surprised that I remembered?"

Were you really that good at playing your clueless student role or was he still under the impression that you were actually dumb? You didn't know whether to be offended by this or to be glad that everything was going slightly too well according to plan.

"Maybe a little," he admits. "I just... didn't think you'd pay attention to any of the things I said. Or remember them."

Oh.

"Why not? Of course I would pay attention." You gently rest your hand on top of his across the table, encouragingly. "You should give yourself more credit. You've already gotten me caught up with everything that happened in the term so far, and frankly, I like hearing what you have to say. I like—" you, nearly comes out of your mouth. But it wasn't time for that yet. You clear you throat. "I like seeing your perspective on different works."

"Oh." Maybe it's just the lighting but there's a pale pink that seems to creep across his cheeks. His skin feels hot under your hand, so you let go.

"Anyway, going back to Romeo and Juliet. You can't put a timeline on love, Younghoon. It just happens whenever it happens." Then in a quieter voice, you add, "There's no need to hold back from it or to try to dodge it."

"Fair enough." Younghoon nods slowly. He goes back to his book and a comfortable silence falls between the two of you again.

When you glance at the calendar on your phone, it tells you that you're supposed to fall in love with him two days from now.

***

The day of your confession comes in the form of both Chanhee's text and your own calendar reminder, which were actually quite unnecessary when this day hasn't been off your mind for a moment. It had required some intensive planning—Younghoon seemed like a romantic after all, so you wanted to do something that would suit him.

He agrees to your suggestion of a nice dinner at a place near campus that was just slightly above casual yet wasn't over the top. You're not sure why he agrees. But at this point you couldn't think of any reason that he would agree to this if it wasn't for being interested in you, so you take it as a good sign.

Dinner goes smoothly for the most part. You set out for ordering food that wouldn't be too difficult or messy to eat, but the main turns out to be much saucier than it sounded. Definitely not cute, but you could only hope that he was already in deep enough that he could overlook it.

"There's no way that actually happened." Your jaw drops as he finishes telling a whole rollercoaster of a story about his friend. "That's crazy."

"I can't believe it happened either," Younghoon laughs. "Meeting someone who also got stood up is already such a rare occurrence, but having to hide under the table so that they could get free dessert?"

"And the fact that they got together after that? Absolutely wild. Your friend Eric sounds like a fun person though." You look up to see the waiter coming by with your dessert. "Speaking of dessert, ours is finally here."

"Unfortunately not free," he chuckles, "but I'd rather have your company than free food."

The waiter sets a couple of candles on your table along with the dessert—you're not sure why but this would work to your advantage for the next few minutes.

"Hey, Younghoon," you start hesitantly, "can I talk to you about something?"

"Yeah, of course."

You dig into the cake first, taking a bite of it as you let the words hang in the air. "I guess there's really no good way of saying this."

"Hmm?"

"I didn't mean for this to happen. But I guess I should've seen it coming." You take a deep breath, "I like you. I really like you, Kim Younghoon."

If it were anyone else, you might expect a smile or some sort of pleased expression. But Younghoon simply furrows his brows. He frowns at your confession. "Are you sure? You barely know me, Y/N."

"Then let me know more of you. Let me see more of you and let me like more of you." So sappy, you think. Would it inspire a poem? Would adding sugar to these words make them more convincing? "I just know that you're a good person. I've seen the way you care for others, the way you're in love with life itself. And I just want you to know that I admire that."

Younghoon doesn't say anything, but you could tell that there's a wavering in his eyes. As if he's just barely holding himself back from wanting to give in.

The rest of your confession gets lost amongst the waiters that come by to take away the empty plates and used cutlery. It was bad timing on your part, but you were sure Younghoon wouldn't have said much in response anyway. Maybe he found the interruption to be a relief that saves him from having to talk. Well, as long as it does the job, it doesn't matter if your confession wasn't perfect.

The night air is cool when the two of you take your time walking in a comfortable silence. Younghoon looks deep in thought beside you, too stuck in his own head to notice you constantly sneaking glances at him.

So you ground him—you walk a little closer to him so that the back of your hand grazes lightly against his, and then you're taking his hand. Intertwining your fingers until his fit so perfectly between yours. He glances at you with surprise, but soon there's a shy smile that spreads across his lips.

"But anyhow, don't let my confession plague you," you say when it's time to part after you get back to campus. You pause only to look down and fiddle with the ring on his finger—a mask of the nervousness that you're supposed to be feeling. Perhaps there's some real nervousness too since your heart does pound loudly when you glance at him and try to read every one of his expressions. That much is real. "My feelings for you are my responsibility only, so you don't have to worry about letting them get between us, okay?"

Just before you turn to leave, you give him a small wave that he returns. The same shy smile is on his face—a tiny one that barely moves the corners of his lips, but you see it in his eyes. His eyes have softened, the wall lowered.

You smile a little to yourself as you pull out your phone to update Chanhee.

You: first mission accomplished. he's on the hook.

***

Younghoon doesn't respond to your confession. At least, not verbally.

The lack of empty tables at the library and cafe led to taking the study session to his apartment, a cozy place just on the outskirts of campus. It was quite neat for someone who lived alone; there were none of the piles of clothes you expected to find, and the books you thought would be scattered across tables were neatly organized on the shelves instead.

"You want a drink?" He takes the stuff out of his bag and sets them on the small table in front of the couch. "I have coffee, tea, and some other things."

"Hmm, surprise me."

It ends up being some sort of strawberry soda.

He settles in on the couch beside you and that's when notice the small black notebook lying on the table. The one that you've seen him carry around with him when you silently observed him all those weeks ago. You pick it up, tracing your fingers over the worn-out edges.

"Oh, is this the notebook that you've been doing your writing in?"

"Wait—" he immediately makes a move to grab it from your hands but stops himself halfway.

"Hmm? I was just kidding." You give him a reassuring smile, holding out the notebook to him. "Younghoon, I would never invade your privacy like that."

"Oh. Well, actually..." He bites his lip, suddenly avoiding your gaze. "If you did want to look through it," he takes a deep breath, "you can."

No, it's okay—I didn't mean to pressure you, is on the tip of your tongue when you realize. Despite his initial reaction, you get the feeling that he wants you to see it. As if he's letting you in and wants you to get a glimpse of his heart through his work.

"Are you sure?" you say instead.

Younghoon nods, hesitant but firm. "The last couple of pages. I-I wrote some poems... about you."

"About me?" You carefully flip open the notebook, turning to the last few pages with writing on them. "Oh."

You recognize his familiar penmanship in black ink across the pages. The letters have a slight tilt as if one leading on to the next, a graceful balance between print and cursive. But what you notice the most is how the words seem to be alive. As you read through his delicately written poems, his words begin to paint a picture in your mind. You start to see yourself from his perspective, from the moment your hands brushed in the lecture hall, to the brilliant smiles you'd shown him, to your confession. You see the times he wanted to smile back, the times when he was touched you remembered something he said. The times his heart thudded when you met his eyes. Each moment was captured in the fine lines of ink gracing the pages.

"This is really embarrassing," he mumbles, turning away from you. "Maybe you shouldn't be reading them. It's kind of stupid."

"No, Younghoon. It's not stupid. Anything that's worth liking is not stupid." You set down the notebook and go to cup his jaw, turning his head so that he's looking right at you. There's a flush on his cheeks that feels hot under your fingertips, but he doesn't avoid your gaze this time. "They're amazing. You're amazing. If it's any reassurance, I can easily say that this is the most romantic thing anyone's ever done for me. You have such a way with words that the emotions they bring are almost tangible. It's a gift, really. I've always admired your perspective and how look at life like you're right where you belong."

He's not the only one who's surprised by your little speech. It surprises you too. You had meant to give one of your typical responses from your plans, something casual but just enough to keep him in your subtle game of push and pull. But everything you said had ended up being the truth.

"Really?" he whispers. His eyes shine with such a bright glimmer of hope that it you find it hard to breathe. The weight of it crushes you, knowing that all of this is not as real as he thinks it is.

But you brush the thought away.

You give him a soft smile. "Yeah, Younghoon. Thank you for showing me."

What you do next is not in your calendar nor in the plans. It's as if you throw everything to the wind when an urge tells you to lean in towards him. It tells you to forget all about the plans because none of it matters except for Younghoon's lips and the way his gaze slowly travels down to yours. The way you really want to find out what it's like to kiss him, to have him in such a vulnerable state of intimacy that he once felt was impossible.

So you lean in, giving in like you've always said he should. You give in to the fluttering of your heart when his eyes close bit by bit, and you give into the burning of your cheeks when he wets his lips.

And then you finally close the distance. You can sense his hesitation at first, holding back like he always does. But as you kiss him and as your hands caress his cheeks ever so tenderly, he slowly relaxes into your kiss. Younghoon's lips move against yours until he's kissing you back, until his lips part and you can taste the heat of his mouth and the strawberry soda on his tongue. A faint sweetness, just like his presence.

The books and notes stay on the table and the studying long forgotten by the time you decide to head home. A glance at the stream of unread texts from Chanhee makes you realize that you'd also completely forgotten about updating him with today's progress.

***

Your roommate confronts you first thing in the morning. Chanhee waits for you in the kitchen with coffee for the two of you, which usually would've been a very nice start to your day, but there's a sense of dread weighing down your stomach. You'd wanted to avoid updating about yesterday because it seemed wrong to be telling anyone about how Younghoon's hair felt between your fingers or how he smelled like orange blossoms when you buried your face in his chest. The poems were a different realm entirely—maybe you'd talk about the kissing if Chanhee asks but revealing anything about the poems felt too much like an invasion of privacy.

So you give him quite a watered-down version of what happened. The two of you had gone to Younghoon's place, and you'd studied the passage that would be on your upcoming quiz, obviously. You'd had strawberry soda and ordered takeout. And that was it. No mentions of kissing, and no mentions of the poems.

Chanhee narrows his eyes at you as if searching yours for answers omitted from your words. "So when are you planning on ending it with him?"

"Maybe in a few more weeks?" you say hesitantly. "I just need to be sure that's he's actually on the hook."

A lie. You don't know why you lie, but perhaps you really weren't completely sure that he has feelings for you. Perhaps you really don't know how long you needed to get him to fully open up to you. Younghoon seemed to guard his heart so tightly that for once you weren't confident in your ability to worm your way in.

Chanhee rolls his eyes dramatically. "Y/N, there's no doubt he's on the hook. The guy is absolutely in love with you already."

"What, did you see him on campus or something?"

"Yeah, I saw the two of you," Chanhee nods, staring at you like it's something obvious. "It was so apparent from the way he looked at you. He's never come close to making such facial expressions before meeting you."

"Um," you pause to take in his words. Stare at him. "So you've also seen him before I met him?"

"I had my own observation period, you know?" He shrugs nonchalantly but a hint of a smirk appears on his face. "The description made him sound so strange that I wanted to see him with my own eyes."

"And? What did you think of him?" you ask nervously. Why did it suddenly feel like you were seeking your friend's approval for a boyfriend?

Chanhee takes a sip of his coffee as he thinks. "Well, the description wasn't wrong..."

"But?"

"But there seems to be much more to him than meets the eye."

"Yeah, of course." You take a sip of your own coffee, then try to search his face for any clues of what he's thinking. "That description barely did him any justice. Clearly whoever sent in this request took his strengths and turned them into his flaws. I just don't get why anyone would hate him so much though."

Your roommate nods slowly, though his face shows he's completely unconvinced. "Right. So. He's definitely in love with you already. And as your manager, I would advise you to end it soon."

"I guess," you mutter under your breath. "Just give me a few more weeks to make sure."

"Don't drag this out, Y/N. Nothing good will come out of it."

You down the rest of the coffee and flash a convincing smile before heading out. Younghoon would be expecting you soon.

But on your walk to campus, Chanhee's words keep repeating in your mind. Was Younghoon really in love with you already? That sentence alone should be enough to make you pleased, because this is what you wanted this whole time. It was a sign that you've successfully completed most of your mission. But for some reason, it's hard to feel happy about it.

***

Asking Younghoon for the translated version of The Little Prince was not an excuse to go back to his place. It wasn't, since you really did not want to attempt analyzing the original copy in French when you could barely count to ten in the language. Yet the shy look he gives you has your heart doing a little leap. The knowledge that you would be alone with him again certainly did not help, nor did the knowledge that he was all too aware of it too.

Maybe the two of you would actually be studying this time though—you'd asked for his copy of the book after all. Maybe you would just be silently reading while he works on that essay he had yet to finish.

And it does go well. The two of you end up lying on the couch, reading the book together as he points out his favourite quotes and helps you with their analyses.

"What do you think of this one?" Younghoon holds the book closer to you, pointing at a couple of lines near the top of the page.

It's the time you spent on your rose that makes your rose so important...People have forgotten this truth, but you mustn't forget it. You become responsible forever for what you've tamed. You're responsible for your rose.

"Oh, I remember seeing this one before when I read a summary earlier." You take the book and flip through it briefly, glancing at the cute drawings of the little prince on all of the planets he travels to. It brings back some memories from when the book had been mentioned in high school, although you hadn't paid much attention in class at the time when you'd found it so boring. When you hadn't had the ability to appreciate things like you do now. "Hmm, I feel like it sums up the central moral of the story quite nicely. What do you think of it?"

"It's one of my favourite quotes," Younghoon says, setting the book down. There's a sparkle in his eye that makes you stop to catch your breath for a second. "Isn't it beautiful that the time and effort you put into something is what ends up making it unique?"

"Yeah," you nod. "There may be hundreds of roses that look the same as yours, but they're not the same because they're not the one that you personally watered and watched grow."

That makes him break into a soft smile. "Exactly. And that alone is what makes it more special to you than the rest of the roses in the world." He pauses to brush a strand of hair away from your face. "That's what makes your rose something you can call yours."

His fingers trail to your cheek and then your jaw, tracing over your features lightly as if a paintbrush on a canvas. And you try not to stare at the warmth contained in his gaze and in his fond smile, but it's as if they cradle you, they coax you until the lines blur and you're unsure of whether this is real or an act. They make you want to give in in the same way you want him to.

"So are you my rose, Younghoon?" you murmur. "Are you mine?"

His thumb lingers on your lower lip for just a second before he answers. "I'll be your rose. Then Y/N, you know you're responsible for my heart now?"

"Yeah, I suppose I am."

The smile on his face widens and it's the last thing you see before his lips are on yours. He kisses you first this time as if he's finally opening up to you, and you find yourself wanting, always wanting, more and more. To hear what it's like when his breath hitches, when he lets out muffled moans against your neck. To see the pleasure written across his face when he stops holding back and lets go. You find yourself wanting him in more ways than you can fathom.

The thought leads to a slight twisting of your stomach, though it quickly becomes hard to remember why when he's now giving in like you'd always wanted him to. When his kisses you and touches you so gently as if you're as delicate as a rose. Maybe you were actually the rose, and he was your prince. Maybe he was responsible for the quickening of your pulse and the inevitable smiles on your face when you're with him.

In the morning when you go to grab the book for class, you can see another quote on the page it's open to.

But if you tame me, then we shall need each other.

***

Chanhee confronts you again as soon as you open the door. At this rate, you'd been avoiding his messages—you'd sent short and vague texts updating him on what had been happening, but some nights you'd put your phone on do not disturb before entirely ignoring it.

"Are you avoiding me?" is the first thing he says. He takes your hand and sits you down at the table before you could run off to hide in your room.

"Um. No?"

"Then why are you ignoring my texts?" Chanhee narrows his eyes suspiciously. "Y/N, what's been going on?"

You avoid his gaze, staying silent even though it would only make you seem more guilty.

"Jiwon stopped by yesterday. Dropped off some bio notes for you." He passes you the folder sitting on top of the counter, a questioning expression on his face. "Have you not been keeping up with school?"

"Um." You shrug. "I might be a little behind?"

Chanhee raises an eyebrow. "Yeah, but this is the first time I've seen you so enthusiastic about reading a play that you'd rather do that than study your gene regulation or whatever it was."

"Oh."

The folder feels thick beneath your hands even though you've only missed a few classes. But when you flip through it, the practice tests and the slides with Jiwon's neat writing filling the margins only serve as a reminder of how much of your real life you've missed while stuck in the role of your fake one.

"Y/N, this is about Younghoon, isn't it?" Chanhee sighs, sitting down beside you. "I knew it wasn't a good idea for you to take him on. Everything from the amount of money to the way his profile was written all looked strange."

You meet his gaze. "Wait, Chanhee, that's exactly it. I've been feeling quite hesitant about," you gesture vaguely, "ending this. But I think that's because I really can't understand why anyone would target him."

"So you haven't spotted any red flags?"

"No, I don't think so." You frown, trying to recall if you'd felt anything but safe and loved while around him. "He's sweet. Literally like a big teddy bear. And of course I don't know everything about him, but I know for a fact that he's different from all of our previous targets."

Chanhee matches your puzzled expression. "That makes it sound like this is a personal vendetta against him. Maybe stemming from a misunderstanding? Do you think there was someone he's rejected in the past?"

"He hasn't mentioned anyone," you shake your head. "But even if there was someone like that, I'm not liking the look of this."

"Does he not have any red flags at all? Maybe something that he's hiding from you?"

"Hmm, well." You pause to think. "Actually, the only red flag might the way he pours the milk before the cereal. Other than that, I really can't think of anything else."

Chanhee's frown deepens. "He—wait what?"

"Yeah, I had to do a double take when he did that."

"That's not what I meant," he waves dismissingly. "You were at his place? Eating breakfast? When this happened?"

"Um." Oh. You quickly wrack your brain, trying to think of excuses that didn't place you in Younghoon's apartment in the morning. Though you suspect that Chanhee must've known anyway when you didn't answer his texts nor come home that night. "Yeah."

"I'm not going to comment on your... personal life," he gives you a pointed look, "but you have to stick with the plan, Y/N. Someone's bound to get hurt if you don't."

"Yeah. Right."

Indeed it had been a stupid thing to do. Kissing your targets was already a sort of grey area but sleeping with them was entirely outside of the agreement. It was stupid of you to spend the night at his place, waking up in his bed with limbs intertwined and sheets tangled as if it were something truer than it should've been. Something real. And then staying for breakfast on top of that and walking to class together with your hand in his—it seemed like a lot of your actions concerning Younghoon had become quite reckless lately.

You check the calendar once you collapse into your bed. It tells you the breakup should've happened three days ago.

***

There's a sinking of your heart when you think about seeing him today. How was it possible to simultaneously feel such happiness and such dread? You wanted to see that beautiful smile of his; you hated the fact that what he was smiling at was only a facade. You wanted him to open his heart; you wanted him to keep his guard up so that he could protect himself from the impending heartbreak. You wanted him to love you; you wanted him to hate you and leave you before you could leave him.

"Hey, are you okay?" The sound of Younghoon's voice pulls you out of your thoughts.

"What?"

"What's wrong, Y/N?" He gives you a worried frown before enveloping you into a hug. "Talk to me."

You heave a sigh, tightening your arms around him as you breathe in his faint scent of orange blossoms and jasmines. Would it be so bad to just stay in his arms forever? You wanted to drown in him, to be so overwhelmed by his love that you forget everything except for the sound of your own name coming out of his mouth. But unfortunately, he couldn't be the solution to your problems if he was also the cause of them.

"Have you ever been stuck in your own kind of 'to be or not to be' moment?" you ask quietly.

Younghoon pulls back to look at you with wide eyes. "You can't mean you're actually contemplating life or death here, right?"

"No," you shake your head. "But I feel like I'm stuck between two decisions. To suffer through the slings and arrows of one even though it may be comfortable and safe, or to end the heartache even though it's uncertain what might happen next."

"Do you think I could help you with this?" An ironic question. It makes you heart hurt seeing that he was so willing to help you make this decision, one that he had no idea was about him.

"Sure," you meet his eyes just briefly, "but um, I can't give you any details."

"That's okay, I get it." He smiles and takes your hand in his, lacing your fingers together. "Well, if it's not concerning matters of life or death like in the play, hmm," he hums as he thinks. "I would say that there's no point in suffering through your sea of troubles. If you're not happy with where you are, then there must be some things that need to change. And even if it's uncertain what may happen next, there are so many possibilities out there that you could run into something good. You'd just have to take a leap of faith to find out."

You nod slowly, trying to process his words. Maybe he was right. Maybe continuing on the path to breaking his heart wasn't the answer, but rather taking a leap of faith and revealing the truth. Whether that might lead to losing him forever or... something else entirely.

"You're smart, Y/N. I trust that you'll make the right decision." Younghoon leans over to gently press a kiss to your lips. "Whichever one you end up deciding on."

When he kisses you again, his lips taste like sadness.

You nearly run home after giving some lame excuse that you can barely remember. With all the uncertainties and dilemmas in your mind, there was one thought that was now crystal clear to you: Younghoon doesn't deserve this. You had to stop this agreement somehow.

"Chanhee, I need to find out who sent in that request," you blurt as soon as you yank the door open.

"Are you okay?" He blinks at you, lowering his glasses. "And why? We said they would all be anonymous, Y/N. This is breaking the contract that you made them sign."

"I just—I can't do this anymore. I need to find out who sent it because Younghoon doesn't deserve this. He never did, and I have no idea who in the world would want to break his heart. If we find out who sent it, maybe I could go talk to them." You start pacing around in front of him, yanking at your hair in frustration. "I could return their money and back out of the deal."

"It's a lot of money though."

"I know. But he doesn't deserve this, Chanhee. There has to be something else going on, something strange. You've got to trust me on this." You then heave a sigh and collapse onto the couch beside him. "Even I have morals, you know."

Chanhee looks at you and then suddenly bends over in laughter. "Kind of hard to believe when we've been running this business since freshman year."

You sigh again.

"But Y/N," he takes your hand and gives it a squeeze, "if this is what you want, I'll find them for you, okay?"

"You're the best, roommate."

You try your hardest to avoid Younghoon for a while whenever you could. It wasn't that you didn't want to see him, but rather you couldn't stand seeing him show you so much love when you'd lied about everything. It was like kicking a puppy—the one person that he trusted was now betraying him. So the studying at the library became needing to help your roommate clean the apartment. Going over to Younghoon's place became a meeting for a group project in one of the courses you didn't share with him. Lunch breaks in the student center became catching up with your friend Jiwon.

Luckily, the result comes out fairly quickly. Chanhee was quite a genius after all, so it really shouldn't be too surprising when he corners you the moment you walk through the door a few days later. He's holding his laptop, glasses on his head, and bathrobe crumpled and half off his shoulder as if he hasn't slept in days.

"So," he stares you down. "Bad news first or good?"

You give him a questioning glance, stepping around him. "Um. Good news?"

"Okay." Chanhee nods, clicking around on his laptop as he follows you to the couch. "The good news is that I found the person who sent in that request."

"Oh. So who was it?" You had not prepared yourself for this moment.

"That," he glances over at you with a frown, "is the bad news."

"Why? Does he have some crazy ex? From what he's told me, I don't think he's dated anyone before—"

"Y/N." He puts the laptop down on the table and sits beside you. Takes both of your hands in his. "It's not his crazy ex... it's yours. Kim Sunwoo."

***

You couldn't believe it. Of all the people that you'd imagined who could've sent the request, Sunwoo was probably the farthest from what you expected. Why did it do it? Younghoon didn't seem to have any ties with the guy, and you certainly didn't either since breaking up with him in freshman year. Could they have known each other in the past? The worse case scenario you could think of was that maybe Sunwoo used to bully Younghoon in high school. Maybe he sent the request to continue it.

Sunwoo doesn't notice you until you're right in front of his table at the student center. He looks up lazily, a tiny smirk ghosting his lips.

"You sent in that request, didn't you?"

He stares at you silently before shrugging. "I might have. What's it to you?"

"Why did you do it?"

"Kind of wanted to see the infamous Y/N dating a loser," he shrugs again, the smirk on his face growing. "How's that been going for you?"

"Younghoon is not a loser," you growl. "He's a better person than you will ever be."

"Yeah? What, are you dating him for real now or something?" Sunwoo laughs and you want to smack that look right off his face. "Wow, didn't think you were this easy."

"Just shut up." Reaching into your bag, you pull out the wad of cash that you'd taken out of the bank today. You shove it at him. "I'm returning this to you and backing out of our deal. So don't contact me ever again."

Then you leave. You leave thinking that doing this made things right. That maybe this would make telling Younghoon the truth a little easier on your guilty conscience. Or that maybe you wouldn't need to break up with him at all, and what you had with him could become real.

But the rumours begin to spread shortly after the confrontation with Sunwoo.

There's no doubt that it was Sunwoo who spread them, seeing as he was the only other person who knew about your fake relationship with Younghoon. It was easy to brush off the whispers in class and the stares in the student center; it didn't matter what people thought of you since you've always had some sort of reputation anyway.

None of it mattered except for the way Younghoon doesn't text back that night, and the way he wears his emotions on his face when you walk into class the next morning.

"Tell me it's not true. Please, Y/N. Say it's not true." Sadness clouds his features as he fights back the tears. He looks absolutely broken.

You wanted to lie to him. To tell him that none of this was true. But for the amount of damage you'd already caused, you owed him the truth no matter how difficult it was.

"I... I'm sorry, Younghoon."

"But how could you, Y/N? I trusted you. I thought we—you were—" Younghoon bites his lip and then quickly wipes his eyes with the back of his hands. He runs out of the room.

You leave too. There was no longer any reason for you to sit in a class you weren't even enrolled in.

There's no reason to chase after him either, so you allow your steps to slow to a stop right outside the lecture hall. Because when you think about it, wasn't this what you wanted when you first laid eyes on the request that came in? Seeing him broken like this was supposed to indicate that you've successfully completed another mission. But the way he'd squeezed his eyes shut and the way his lip had quivered—seeing that had only made your own heart hurt. They make you regret ever accepting this request, ever starting this business in the first place.

When you get home, you finally reveal everything to Chanhee. Everything from your feelings for Younghoon and how you were going to tell him the truth, to the confrontation with Sunwoo and the start of the rumours. And as he listens, it dawns on the two of you that the website should be shut down. That maybe it should've never existed. There would be no more requests, no more targets, and no more pretending to be someone you're not for the sake of hurting others. It was already difficult to remember why you thought it was such a good idea in the first place—taking pride in being able to make anyone fall for you, and then using it to hurt them? It all sounds so stupid and hurtful now. But none of it mattered anymore.

None of it matters aside from the way Younghoon leaves the room right when you walk in. The way he sits in a corner as far from you as possible when he spots you in the library or at the student center, the way he seems to cower until he's so small despite being so tall. It's as if he's gone back to the way he was before meeting you, but to an even more extreme level—the walls are up and barricaded, refusing to as much as let anyone give him a glance.

It takes a week before you can muster up the courage to try to talk to him.

"Younghoon! Wait up. Can we talk?" You reach for his arm on instinct, but he flinches away from you. "Please?"

His eyes are already guarded but you can see the way they harden even more. "What is there to talk about? Haven't you done enough?"

"What?"

"You've managed to do what you set out to do, right?" He scoffs. "You win."

"No, Younghoon," you shake your head. "Listen, I gave that money back. I backed out of the deal because I couldn't do it anymore—"

"So?"

"So I care about you, genuinely. I couldn't go on with the deal anymore because I actually care about you. I don't want to break your heart, Younghoon. I want to love y—"

"Sorry to disappoint, Y/N." He finally looks you right in the eye. "But you can't exactly break my heart if I never fell for you in the first place."

"H-hey," you say just as he's about to turn away. "You can't just trust everything you hear, you know."

He barely spares you a glance. "Yeah? You also can't trust everyone who's nice to you."

And with that, he leaves. Never once turning back.

You heave a sigh, heading back home instead of going to any of the bio lectures you had scheduled for the rest of the day. You tell yourself that this was to be expected—surely, you couldn't have hoped that he would just magically forgive you and that things would fall back together so easily? If you'd learned anything from all the reading you'd done, it was that 'The course of true love never did run smooth.'

Ever since starting the business, you'd always thought that there was bound to be some red flags with each of your targets because surely they're targets for a reason, right? Maybe they were an asshole to everyone around them, maybe they were playing around with people and stringing them on. Maybe they spread nasty rumours. But in all of the time you spent with Younghoon looking for a red flag, you never realized that maybe you were the red flag. You were the one playing around with hearts, breaking them one by one until they're crushed beneath your feet. And this time with Younghoon, it was never about the target. It was about you.

Maybe Sunwoo didn't send that request because he wanted you to date someone he thought was a loser. Maybe this was his way of getting revenge on you—sending you a good guy whom he knew you'd actually fall for, and then having the heartbreaker's own heart get broken.

***

In the weeks you spend hanging around the apartment, you notice that Chanhee seems to feel guilty too. He helps you clean the living room, makes you coffee, and tries to cheer you up. It felt to you as if he was putting his efforts into the wrong person because you didn't deserve it at all, but you could also understand him. He may not have been the one to do the heartbreaking nor was he the one in direct contact with the people you went after, but you could tell that the guilt from creating the website and managing it seemed to be catching up with him now.

It was as if the haze in your mind had lifted once the website was shut down, and you were finally able to take a step back and evaluate the choices you'd made. How had the two of you become so lost in this journey? It's not that you had no morals—you knew that you were both decent people. But how had this business clouded your judgment so much? How was it possible to lose every sense of your being to such a worthless cause?

Perhaps now you realize how Macbeth had met his downfall, and how Hamlet had spiralled into his descent to madness.

"If you're that miserable then at least try to win him back," Chanhee raises an eyebrow at you from his usual spot at the couch. "Do something. Don't just mope around."

"I can't just do that. How could I ever dare show my face again when I've hurt him so much?"

The black coffee you're holding barely tastes bitter over the mask of how bitter your life had become. Between all the catching up you've had to do for your biology classes, you'd thought that there would be no time to think about him. And it wasn't like you've never been through a breakup before, but none of them had felt like this.

Your roommate glances at you up and down, frowning. "You do know it's not that simple? Yeah, you've hurt him but that doesn't mean his feelings for you will be erased just like that. And if you really want this, then you shouldn't be giving up so easily either."

"Maybe, but this isn't some kind of romance novel where the main characters always end up together," you groan. "And besides, how am I supposed to just win him back? He's probably blocked me on all platforms and never wants to see me again."

"Well, how did you get him to fall for you? Could you use the same tactics?"

"Ugh, don't even talk about that." You bury your head in your hands. "Everything was so fake, okay? No more tactics or games. I want to throw up just thinking about how I did that to him."

Chanhee crosses the room and sits down in the chair beside you. "Y/N, I'm sure not all of it was fake. If you're feeling this way right now, then that means you really did bare a part of your heart to him." He puts an arm around you, rubbing soothing circles on your back. "Everything you did for him outside of the plans when you strayed from them—those things weren't fake, okay? You did them out of your sincere feelings towards him."

"I guess." You sniffle, wiping the tears away with your sleeve. "But what am I supposed to do now?"

For someone who's always had a way of winning people's hearts and a bunch of tricks up your sleeve, you suddenly feel so lost. Without knowing the end result, without having the plan that you'd always so intricately built, it felt like you were grasping with the unknown.

"Show him your sincerity," Chanhee suggests. "He likes poetry right? You can attempt to write a poem."

You nearly spit out your coffee. "Is that a joke?"

"Obviously. Please don't actually write any," he deadpans. Then he nudges you playfully. "Hmm, how about a love letter? Handwritten on paper of course. I don't mean typing it out and printing it or anything like that."

"That might work." You nod, already thinking of potential things to write about. "Thanks for the idea."

"Just make sure your writing is neat, okay? You might need a bit of practice first."

You flick him on the forehead before retreating to your room.

***

Younghoon, I'm sorry. If you do decide to read this, just know that I honestly regret what I did. Though you have to know that I don't regret getting to know you or being with you. I don't regret any moment I've spent with you. The things I said to you were all genuine. I didn't need to fake those. I only lied about switching majors but the things that you've taught me were things that I've actually come to enjoy. My feelings for you are genuine too. I'm really sorry that we met this way, but maybe in another life—

You shake your head, erasing the last part. That was dramatic even for him.

I'm really sorry that we met this way, but I'm not sorry to have loved you—

Was that any better? Maybe it should be erased too.

"It's fine, Y/N. You're allowed to express your love in a love letter," Chanhee rolls his eyes from where he stands behind you, looking at your letter from over your shoulder. His face wears an expression of disgust despite the reassuring words he just said.

"Hey!" You quickly cover up your letter. "Were you standing there the whole time?"

He chuckles, nodding. "Are you done? Let's go send it to lover boy, shall we?"

And so, Chanhee walks you to the library. You don't have to check Younghoon's schedule to know that he would be between classes, probably studying by himself at this hour. It briefly makes your heart clench; you'd missed the times when the two of you hung out together, but now he'd be alone just as he'd been before you came along and ruined his life.

"This makes me feel like some boy in a romcom," you mutter under your breath. The envelope sits between your fingers, slightly wrinkled from how much you've fiddled with it on your way to campus. "You know. The whole throwing a stone at your window, waiting there with a giant sign and a boombox."

"That would be a little difficult to do when he lives in an apartment building," Chanhee laughs. "Just stick with your love letters, okay? I'm sure he'll appreciate those."

Chanhee lingers a few paces behind you when you walk up to the section of desks in the library. Younghoon was easy to find—this was one of the usual tables where the two of you had spent your time.

You're standing right in front of him when he finally looks up, but Younghoon quickly lowers his head back to his notes when he realizes it's you. It nearly makes you back out of this entire plan, and if it weren't for Chanhee making somewhat encouraging faces at you, maybe you really would have. But you don't. You reach over and quietly set down the envelope on the desk in front of him, then you leave.

The love letter delivery continues the next day.

Truthfully, you had no idea what to write now that the words you wanted to say had already been said. You've already expressed how sorry you were, and you'd said before how much you admired him, how you wanted to learn about every part of him. What was left for you to write to him about?

So you tell him about yourself instead—your true self. You tell him about your real major, your roommate Chanhee, your friend Jiwon. Some of your notable memories from childhood. Your favourite books and movies and foods. Then you tell him how the idea for this business started, and how you lost yourself in the process. Being intrigued by him, straying from your plans, and then falling for him. Having this teach you that maybe you weren't better than your targets with red flags all over, and that maybe you weren't better than the ex that put you up to this. You give him a piece of your heart in this letter in the hopes that you could return how much of his he's given you.

You find Younghoon at the student center this time, during the hour-long lunch break between classes. At least he hasn't made any major changes to his routine. You would be in trouble if you couldn't even find him on campus, and maybe then you'd really have to resort to throwing stones on his sixth-floor apartment window.

Younghoon gives no indication of having read the first letter, nor does he look at you when you place it on the table in front of him this time. He leaves it sitting there as he continues eating, and you leave before you could see what he does with it. But at least he's no longer going out of his way to avoid you now—maybe that was a good sign.

The third letter goes over some of your memories together. You write about how grateful you are that he was willing to tutor you, how sorry you are that that part had been fake. The way you wanted to impress him not to make him fall for you, but rather just to see him smile and hear him laugh. The way literature no longer became another boring page for you to read, but rather came to life around you with each word that came out of his mouth.

The fourth letter is conversational. You ask him about his life: what he likes to do for fun, how he spends his spare time. What he's hoping to do after graduation, what he wants to do with his life. What inspires him each day. What made him fall in love with the words across pages. You ask him what love means to him.

When you go to deliver this one to him, what you don't expect is for him to look up at you.

"I wrote you one back," Younghoon holds out the envelope just before you could turn to leave. He quickly goes back to his notes after you take it, but the simple gesture makes your heart quicken tenfold.

"Oh," you manage to get out. "Okay."

Chanhee isn't home when you ultimately decide to open the letter that night. Perhaps it might be better with some moral support around, but you couldn't bear to let him see your tears if the contents are saddening.

Dearest Y/N,

Thank you for your letters. Thank you for being truthful. I appreciate it, truly.

I'll start by saying that I don't hate you. I'm not sure if I forgive you yet, though I'll save that for another time. Ever since meeting you, my life has become a rollercoaster. You've made me so incredibly happy, Y/N. I loved the time that we've spent together and cherished every moment of it. You've taught me to feel an incredible range of emotions that I would've never imagined possible, and you've taught me that it's okay to experience different things and to live life fully without holding back. That being said, I've also felt the lowest of lows when the truth was revealed. It hurt, Y/N. It hurt to know that I wasn't wanted, but it hurt more knowing that someone as lovely as you would do such a cruel thing.

But as much as I wanted to hate you for what you've done, I know that we are not perfect. I know that people make mistakes and that oftentimes, things don't happen the way we intend them to. Maybe you had not intended to love me, but I had also not intended on falling in love with you. Maybe that makes us even.

Thank you for giving me some time and space. I think I'm ready to talk now.

Love always,

Younghoon

***

"Hi."

"Hi."

When he sits down on the bench beside you, all of the words you'd wanted to say suddenly leave your mind. You'd wanted nothing more than to pull him in and bury yourself in him, to make sure that he's real. That everything the two of you had was tangible. But now there's a tentative silence lingering in the air. It's filled with the chirping of birds in the background and the distant shouts of kids at the playground on the other side of the park, and the warmth of the sun on your face; even if nothing goes well then at least there was something good from today.

"I've missed you, Y/N," Younghoon says softly. An admission that takes you by surprise. "And I'm sorry for what I said to you that time... about. Not falling for you." He gives you a wry smile. "I think you already know by now, but it wasn't true."

"Yeah, but it's okay. I deserved it."

He shakes his head. "You don't need to be so hard on yourself. You're not a bad person, Y/N. Maybe it took some time for you to find yourself again, but you're still you."

Then he goes on to respond to everything you'd written in your letters: he laughs at your memory of dropping your scoop of ice cream with the first lick, and glances at you with worry at the part where you'd fallen out of a tree house in your backyard. A jokingly judgmental face when he questions your taste in books, and a restaurant suggestion when he gets to your favourite foods.

Younghoon doesn't mention the business, however, and it makes you realize that he doesn't need to. Because it's not something that's essential to who you are as a person and shouldn't be a part of your identity. The way his eyes light up when talking about the other parts of your life is enough to reassure you of that.

He answers all the questions you'd asked him too. He tells you about being in a city far from home, drowning himself in studies and hiding himself between the pages of books. Losing inspiration and then finding it again in people and in the beauty of the simple things in everyday life. Feeling lost in life and then realizing that maybe he's exactly where he's meant to be.

Younghoon hesitates when he gets to your last question. What love means to him.

"Honestly, aren't we all trying to figure that out?" he says thoughtfully. "I don't think it can be defined in just one way; it's something that we learn a little more about each day. The stories we live to tell and the events that shape our lives—they may teach us to love the world a little more, and by extension, each other. So in a way, love can be anything you want it to be."

You nod slowly, letting the words sink in. Feeling a wave of admiration wash over you again at the reminder of what made you fall for him in the first place.

His voice is barely audible when he asks, "What do you want it to be, Y/N?"

"I—"

This was something you hadn't thought about in a long time. With all of your recent relationships being fake, you'd not only lost your sense of self but also your definition of love. Your mind blanks and it doesn't help that each moment in the lingering silence sends your stomach into a frenzy of butterflies and makes your heart jump out of your chest. But when you see how he gazes at you so patiently, so lovingly, the answer becomes quite clear to you.

"I want it to be with you." You pause, trying to organize your words. They're cheesy and might've been something that would've made you cringe before, but now they feel right. "Dancing in the kitchen with you at midnight, as I ignore my roommate's texts. Having your face be the first thing I see when I wake up, and the last thing I see before I fall asleep. And well, coming home to you would be a much better sight that having Chanhee glare at me from across the living room."

Younghoon bursts out laughing. "Why am I getting the feeling that you hate him more than you like me?"

And then you join him, laughing freely until your stomach is hurting.

"But Younghoon, I don't just like you. There may be a million people out there and maybe we could've simply been nothing to each other. But it's the time that we spent together that has made you so special to me. And maybe there are millions of roses in the world, but you're my only one, unique rose."

You no longer have to fake your nervousness when it's now real. The heat on your cheeks and the loud thuds of your heart are enough to prove that this was never just a fake relationship—it was never fake when he means so much to you that you want to scream it from the rooftops until he finally knows.

When you see the way Younghoon presses his lips together as if holding back the grin that threatens to break on his face, you take it as a good sign. So you do tell him.

"And I want to be responsible for your heart, if you would let me."

This time, he gives in to the smile on his lips and his whole face lights up. "Y/N, you don't have to ask when it was already yours to begin with. Just take care of it, okay?"

"I will. I promise."

And despite the way you already have his heart, you can still see him continue to give you more of it. He gives you a tiny piece when he pulls you closer, and another when he wraps you in his arms like he can't stand another minute of being apart. The angle is awkward, your knees bump, and you have to twist your neck a little, but everything fades into the background once you meet his warm lips halfway.

He tastes sweeter than you remembered; the faint sweetness that had lingered on your tongue and then in your mind for much longer. And he gives in to you easily. He gives you the little fragments of a heart that you'd broken, piece by piece until they stitch themselves together and become whole again.

A high-pitched scream sounds in the distance, making you pull apart immediately. When you turn to look, there's a little girl running across the field in front of you followed by her group of friends.

"Ew, cooties!" she screams, laughing as she runs.

"Um. Let's take this elsewhere, yeah?" Younghoon says with a laugh. "Don't want to be scarring the kids for life."

You can't help the grin that creeps onto your face. "Good idea," you nod, "lead the way."

When you go to text Chanhee about not going home tonight, there's no longer any dread or fear since your update is no longer for some sort of mission. This time when you text him, you thank him for the idea of the love letters and let him know just how in love you are. He sends the vomit emoji back, but even that puts a smile on your face when your heart was blooming with warmth.

[lilysdaydreams]

Praise Bingus (No fucking way)

→  I do not claim to know corpse- therefore please don't think that this is what he would actually act like, or that any details about his life are actually true. this is fiction.

→ Pairing: Corpse Husband X Fem!Reader

→ Genre: Angst and fluff. (FLUFF IS COMING I SWEAR)

→ Words: 3.9k

→ In a world where everyone is born with a mark on their wrist, two souls come together over the power of bingus.

→ (this isnt crack lol)

→ Warnings: Lots of swearing, um self-depreciation? rejection (kinda) and negative thoughts overall. Sorry im new to warnings.

→ Authors Note: this is the first time im doing like angst so please tell me if I did well? Um also, I’ve already started on the part 2 so keep your eyes out for that. If you wanna be tagged for part two please comment and lemme know. Also check out my other fics if you want!

→ Buy me a coffee

Part two  →    

~~~

Soulmates were a phenomenon. They'd been there for ages, drawn into the Egyptian tomb paintings, seen in the cave paintings from millions of years ago, talked about in stories passed down from generation to generation. They could be matching drawings, first words, names; all black before the soulmates met and turning gold the moment they talked to each other. There wasn't a scientist in the world who could explain the phenomenon.

You'd received your mark at birth just like everyone else, a sentence running around your wrist,

"No fucking way."

Your parents weren't that happy when you asked at the age of 4 what "fucking" meant but it wasn't that bad. You were happy that you had something unique, something other than the "Hi," or "Excuse me," that was on every other arm.

When you were 13, a little girl on the train pointed to your wrist and asked her mom what it meant. Ever since then, you'd taken to wearing bracelets over it. This had turned out to be a good idea because a few years later you started making Youtube videos. At the age of 16, you started a Youtube channel where you focused on a variety of things; makeup, fashion, games, art, skits and a whole lot more.

At the age of 20, you had a steady following of a little more than a million subscribers, and you had moved to LA to be closer to all your Youtube friends. You hadn't just grown on Youtube, you'd also started a lot of side projects. You were known for the art that you did on the side, along with the makeup palette you'd come out with a year ago. Soon you were planning to release a merch collection, one that you had been working on for a whole year now.

You hadn't met your soulmate at this point but honestly, you didn't really mind. Balancing Youtube and study (along with all your other side projects) was hard. There was no need to add the struggle of love into it... Or that's what you told yourself anyways.

There were days though, days where you wished you had someone to hug, someone to cuddle in bed with, someone to go on long walks with. You didn't let yourself wallow on it that long though. Crying about it was gonna do absolutely nothing.

It started on a rainy day. The story of you and him. You were editing your soon to be uploaded video, an e-girl outfits lookbook, which had been requested by your followers. Your personal style was all over the place and your previous soft girl and cottage care look books had done well, so you decided to continue the series.

You eyes blurred as you looked at the same point of the video, and you sighed, removing your glasses and rubbing your eyes. Your editor was sick and had let you know that they wouldn't be able to edit it by the deadline so here you were, editing it yourself. You stretched in your chair letting out a yawn. You were contemplating on whether to make coffee or not when your phone pinged.

"Nooooo" you whined when you noticed it was on the coffee table that was just a little out of your reach. Stretching your foot out, you tried to grab it between your toes and then sighed when the phone fell.

"I have zero luck, I swear" you muttered to yourself, bending to pick up the phone.

The text was from Rae, asking you to join a game of Among Us. You and Rae had been friends for a bit now, which all started when she came across your art and decided to order something from you. You had chatted and clicked immediately, immediately becoming fast friends. Ever since the lockdown started, she often asked you to join in on Among us games and your friendship had really grown over these past few months.

You sent a quick "sure!" and then went to your table, waiting for the PC to turn on. Quickly tweeting out that you were streaming, you opened up Youtube and turned on the stream, saying a quick hello and letting them know what you'd be doing.

"Rae just invited me guys, I don't really know who's there," you mumbled, replying to a comment asking you who you were playing with.

You squinted your eyes, joining the voice chat and then opening your phone camera to quickly check that you didn't look horrible. Sure you didn't really care about how you looked but it was always good to check that you didn't have anything stuck between your teeth before you turned on the camera.

There was already a conversation going on, between who you thought was Corpse and Sykkuno, judging by their voices.

"Yeah I could totally do that. Get a cat and name it Bingus. I wonder if th-"

You gasped when you heard what they were talking about and unmuted yourself immediately yelling "PRAISE LORD BINGUS" and effectively shocking everyone in the chat.

A moment of silence and then Rae yelled: "OH MY FUCKING GOD Y/N, YOU SCARED THE CRAP OUT OF ME."

You giggled as everyone groaned and whined, saying hi as they realised who it was. You had played with Sykkuno and the others a few times before but you'd never met Corpse before. You'd heard his voice though, as he was trending on twitter constantly over the past few weeks. Once they all quietened down, you realised Corpse hadn't said anything. Since you knew everyone else in the lobby, you introduced yourself, wondering if you'd scared him a bit too hard.

"Hey Corpse, I'm Y/N from Y/C/N, its so nice to finally meet you," you said gritting your teeth at you awkward introduction. For a second there was no response and then three words were said that made your jaw drop to the floor.

"No fucking way"

He had whispered it, obviously still in shock, and your eyes widened in surprise as a tingle spread all over your body. So this was what everyone meant by "you'll just know," when you asked them about how you would recognize your soulmate.

"Holy shit" you thought frozen in your seat.

Never had you been more glad that you hadn't turned the camera on yet.

"Uhhhh-" you started, but stopped now knowing what to say.

What the fuck were you supposed to do now.

"Wha- Whats wrong?" Rae asked after a moment passed.

Corpse cleared his throat and started "Its um, shes my -" and you cut him off, heart beating in your chest.

"Nothing. Its nothing." you said talking over him. "Who else are we waiting for Rae?" you asked joining the lobby quickly and choosing red as your colour.

"Uh one more person," she said slowly, still a bit confused.

"Oh awesome!" you said fake enthusiasm prevalent in your voice. "So Sykkuno," you started, wanting to keep the conversation going. "How's Bimbus doing?"

Sykkuno launched into a story of Bimbus and you blew out a sigh of relief, mind still numb over the revelation.

Corpse was your soulmate.

The guy who had literally went viral the past few weeks was your soulmate.

You'd finally found him.

You heard Rae cut Sykkuno off, telling everyone she was starting the game and muttered a "Thank god" when the words "CREWMATE" appeared on your screen. You would not have been able to play imposter at the moment, your mind pretty much stuck on the fact that Corpse was your fucking soulmate.

Heading down to admin, you realised you hadn't said anything yet to the stream so you quickly turned on your cam, saying a quick sorry to the viewers.

"Sorry guys, I forgot to put the camera on," you smiled focusing on card swipe.

"I hope everyone's been okay, I know this was quite sudden, but Rae invited me and I was like why not you know," you said rambling as you moved to comms and did the task there.

Lights were called and you moved to electrical, arriving there just as Leslie fixed them. You moved into the back of electrical doing the three tasks you had there when Sykkuno suddenly came in and went straight to standing on top of the vent.

You giggled already knowing his trick.

"Okay guys," you mumbled watching Sykkuno wiggle on the vent. "do we trust Sykkuno or not?"

"You know what," you said making a split second decision. "Its the first game, we might as well."

Joining him on the vent, you stilled for a second and then breathed a sigh of relief when he didn't automatically kill you.

"See, what did I tell you guys huh?" you question smiling straight at the camera. "I knew Sykkuno could be trusted."

You decided to follow Sykkuno going into reactor with him and starting 'Simon says' and just as you were on the last part, a body was found making you let a whine out.

"Guysss," you whined to the camera as Rae started talking about how she had found Daves body in admin.

"Um, I havent been in admin since the start of the game," you said, "also I can clear Sykkuno, for the last part of the round, he's been with me since lights went out."

Sykkuno confirmed it, "Yup that's right, also I can hard clear Y/N cuz guess what? She stood on the vent with me and none of us died."

Everyone chuckled as he said "Thats good enough for me."

"Uh, I was in navigation mostly." said Lily.

"Poki, can I just ask what you were doing?" said Sean, an undercurrent of mirth present.

"Me?" asked Poki speaking for the first time. "What was I doing?"

"You weren't doing any tasks, you were literally just walking from one side of medbay to the other when I peeked in."

Poki started laughing, trying to get her words out at the same time.

"Okay so-" a giggle. "okay okay- I was just, I was trying to um do the beep test," she said finally breaking down and making everyone else laugh as well.

"What the fuck?" you said, laughing at the image in your mind.

"My chat told me to do it last game so I decided to do it now, I was literally just playing around," she said finally, adding "I swear I'm not imposter" at the end.

"Hmmm," you hummed, bringing a hand up to stroke your chin. "Are you sure it was last game Poki... hm...."

Giggling at Poki indignant "YES it was last game", you quickly skipped voting like everyone else as the timer went into the last ten seconds.

Humming a tune under your breath, you went back to reactor, taking a minute to carefully do Simon says and then moved to the other task counting out one two three as you pressed on the numbers. Humming, you moved out of reactor, only to come face to face with Corpse. You paused for a second, and then moved ahead, refusing to show anything on camera. For some reason he followed you as you went to storage, looking at you while you did the trash.

"Why is he just staring?" you mumbled, biting your lip. God, you really didn't wanna think of him right now. You started walking to shields, him still walking with you when lights were called and not a second later a body was reported.

Suddenly there was screaming your ears as Toast and Rae both started accusing each other.

"Wait- Wait WAIT" yelled Poki trying to get them to stop. "What happened?"

"I'll explain" declared Rae, not letting toast get a word in. "We were in navigation okay, me, Toast and Leslie. Lights went out, and suddenly a report buttons there. It's either Toast or someone came in just as lights went out and killed but that doesn't seem likely because I didn't see anyone anywhere near us at all. Anyways I'm fucking telling the truth guys, its Toast, he's the one who did it."

"Toast, do you have anything to say for yourself?" asked Corpse, his voice making your insides shiver.

"Holy shit, this is my soulmate", you thought for the fiftieth time.

"Uh yeah," replied toast. "I didn't do it."

Everyone laughed as he continued.

"Like seriously, I wouldn't do anything like this because it'd be a stupid move from my own part, and I think Raes smart enough to not do this as well. I think someone else came in just as lights went down and killed immediately, which to be honest, was pretty smart of them."

"Okay so I can clear Corpse," you cut in noticing the timer was close. "he was with me in weapons when it happened, he wouldn't have had time to go all the way up, or even vent there because we were literally walking in."

"Yup that's right," confirmed corpse.

"I'm in cafeteria" said Poki.

"Yeah, I saw her on my way to weapons," said Sykkuno, "and I'm in weapons right now,"

"I'm in lower engine" said Sean, and Lily said she was in reactor.

"I think it's Toast," you mumbled and then rose your voice to talk over everyone. "Look okay fine, maybe he said it was a stupid move and he wouldn't do it but maybe he did it for that exact reason. He thought he could get away with it because no one would expect him to do something like that."

As the timer started going down by 10, you voted for Toast and it turned out 3 had skipped the vote while five had voted for him.

damn.

"Guys you actually voted for him?" you said in a high voice, re-enacting one of Sykkunos most said lines.

You heard a "oh for gods sake" from Rae before everyone went silent and you giggled as you moved back down to weapons to do your tasks.

You finished all your tasks and decided to go to security to check where everyone is. Humming as you moved through the electrical hallway, you narrowed your eyes as Corpse came out of electrical and went towards storage. Quickly ducking in you didn't see a body so you headed back out, going into cams and gasping as you saw the body. Reporting immediately you were shocked to see the four kills that had happened. Now only you, Corpse, Sean and Rae were left.

"Oh my god," you mumbled confused. Either there were still two imposters, and Toast wasn't the imposter or the imposter literally killed and did nothing else. Now either that could mean that its definitely Rae if Toast wasn't the imposter, or that it was Corpse as the only imposter left. That was a bit weird though becuase he could have totally killed you at the start of the game. You didn't suspect Sean at all.

"What the fuck?" mumbled Corpse, and Rae made her animal noises expressing her shock.

"Okay," you said taking charge and relaying the kill and your theory to everyone. "So either it was Toast and there's only one other imposter, who is Corpse. Or Toast wasn't an imposter and there's two of them left. I-" you took a deep breath in at the end, very confused. " I don't know anymore,"

"I think its Corpse as well,"

Corpse who hadn't said anything up till this moment suddenly started stammering out "hey-hey uh let-lets not gang up on me okay. It's not-"

"No, wait, its because Y/N said you came out of electrical right, and I saw you in upper engine literally a bit ago and you went down. I went towards cafeteria so I don't know exactly where you went but its totally possible that you killed."

You voted form him after that, convinced it was Corpse, and the other followed quickly.

"Guys what the fuck, at least give me a chance to explain my self" he whined when his body was thrown off the ship seconds later. You cheered when the "VICTORY" sign was displayed across the screen, bringing up your chat and laughing at Toast as he pretended to be angry at me.

"That was a great round, good work Y/N"

"Thankyou" you mumbled staring at your chat. You were confused when you saw the absolute influx of messages on there, and you were barely able to read them because they were going so fast. You scrolled up, and read through the few of the messages;

"You've made corpse sad."

"Corpse has literally been so quite since you came in, can you leave."

"Omg stop with the hate messages, its not her fault if corpse isn't talking to you"

"are you his ex or something? What was that reaction at the start?"

"what did you do? Corpse literally hasn't said a word since you came in."

"Um..."

Corpse POV

Corpses heart stopped for a minute, his breath catching. The words on his wrist glowed gold, and he stared at the little red character standing there.

This person was the reason that he had "PRAISE BINGUS" stretched across his wrist.

They were the only reason that he had searched "Bingus" on google for all of his life. The only reason Corpse knew about the meme before anyone else was because he was constantly monitoring the word online. Ever since March, he had been waiting with bated breath, anxious that he could meet his soulmate at any moment. and here you were.

For some reason, he had never expected that he would meet you in among us, or while he was on stream. He always thought it'd be someone outside. It was a bit stupid in hindsight as all he did nowadays was play among us.

He heard you introduce yourself to him but the only thing that came out of his mouth was “No fucking way”.

Immediately after he wanted to slap himself.

“Idiot” he thought to himself. “At least try to make a good impression.”

When Rae asked what was wrong, heat sprung to his cheeks as he started revealing that they were soulmates, but Y/N cut him off, saying that it was nothing.

Corpse’s heart sank a little then.

'Maybe she’s just a private person,' he reasoned with himself.

'I shouldn’t have tried to say it on stream either. God, I’m a fucking idiot, if I said it, literally everyone would know and not only would I have hated the attention, she probabaly would have as well.'

Convincing himself that she was right, he reassured himself that it wasn’t because of him. She wasn’t revealing it because she probably didn't want all the attention.

For some reason though, his heart sank even more when Y/N didnt talk to him, instead talking to sykkuno about his dog. Like sure he could understand not wanting to reveal they were soulmates but shouldn’t she at least wanna talk to him? At this point he wouldn’t even mind if she talked about his voice like everyone else.

He groaned when the word "Imposter" came across his screen, his and Toasts character standing together. He was not in the right mindset right now to be able to be a good imposter. Breathing in deeply he continued in the game, with the first round passing by quick. The second round, he saw Y/N and stood with her for a bit wondering if he should kill her. Her red character moved to weapons and he sighed moving the mouse over the kill button. Just as he was thinking of clicking a body was found. Corpse swore as Toast flew off the ship. Deciding he needed to speed it up he killed four people in the round, hissing when the meeting was called. The moment Y/N accused him, he knew it was over. He didn't even bother defending himself much, just hoping the game would end soon.

When they were in the lobby, he quickly told everyone that he was going to leave because his internet was acting up. Turning off the stream after saying a quick thank you to everyone, he leaned back in his seat breathing through his nose.

What the fuck was his life.

Even his soulmate didnt want him. Honestly, he should have expected this. Abandoned at 12 with no one around him, why did his expect his soulmate to even give a fuck about him. Tears pricked his eyes and he blinked trying to get rid of them. He breathed in deeply, grabbing the water on the table and taking a big gulp. He had never hated himself more than he did right now. Why couldnt he have an easier life.

“Why cant I just fucking be NORMAL” he yelled throwing the empty bottle of water at the wall.

Throwing himself into bed, he scrunched up his eyes, hoping that sleep would come today, not noticing as his phone lit up with a single message.

Your POV

You stayed for another game and then ducked out apologizing and making an excuse up.

"Sorry it was such a short stream, everyone," you said pouting at the camera. "It was fun though so hopefully I get to do it again." Waving goodbye, you turned off the camera and leaned your head back staring at the ceiling.

What the actual fuck.

Grabbing your phone, you stared at it for a bit. Everything that you had pushed to the back of your mind in the game, was suddenly in the forefront.

The only thing you knew about Corpse was that he had a really deep voice, he narrated horror movies, and he maybe did music?

'Rae mentioned that once right?' you thought to yourself.

You unlocked the phone and then locked it again, too scared to actually do anything.

Unlocked.

Locked.

Unlocked.

Locked.

"Oh get a grip," you muttered to yourself, opening the phone and sending a text to Rae.

‘Hey Rae, do you have corpses number? Do you mind sending it to me, I need to tell him something.’

A reply came in a minute,

‘umm, why. he's pretty private so idk i don't rlly wanna give his number if he doesn't want someone to have it’

You sighed, and decided you might as well tell her. You knew Rae wouldn't betray your trust.

‘He's my soulmate’

Immediately a ‘AHDJHAKJKAGDAK’ came as a reply and you giggled at the string of emojis after it.

‘Don't tell anyone,’ you sent quickly, trying to calm her down.

‘Okay okay, its XXX - XXX - XXXX, ASHAGDH IM DYING OMG. GO TALK TO HIM.’

Biting your lip you added Corpse into your contacts hesitating before putting a small black heart next to his name.

"Already simping," you mumbled under your breath, hands hovering over the keyboard as you struggled to think of what to write.

You finally decided on 'Hey, its Y/N, can I call?' thinking that something short would be the best way to go. Hand hovering over the send button, you sucked in a breath and pressed it, waiting with bated breath.

A minute passed.

And then five.

And then, without you even you realising, it'd been half an hour of you just looking at your phone.

An hour later, you were slumped on your desk, eyes closed and snoring lightly, the phone still open, the message you sent lighting up the screen.

tbc.

[shojimezolovemail]

Smile for the Camera

reader is a camboy, sero is sad bc they broke up but endeavor is in the chat and reader fucks him <3

A/N: originally written for a friend but i thought enji stans would enjoy! requests are always open :3

warnings: smut, reader has feminine body parts but is technically gender neutral!

also available on ao3

You didn’t want to end things the way they did with Sero. It was heart wrenching just thinking about it but you knew it was probably for the best that you split up. He did cheat on you after 9 years after you had moved in and almost had children together.

You had received a call from Kirishima the night that it happened and didn’t want to believe him at first. Why would your husband of 4 years do something like that? The boy sent photos and clips of Sero grinding up on Kaminari kissing all over his chest.

Your stomach dropped and you immediately blew up his phone. The two didn’t even get the chance say their goodbyes as you packed up and left during the time Sero was out. You tried to call him or Kaminari or anyone at that event. Kirishima offered to leave early to help but you couldn’t bare to be around anyone besides yourself.

That was almost 6 months ago and now you’re steady living on your own in an apartment near the city. It was nice and easy to manage, though a bit lonely.

You started a side hustle as a camboy in the last few months and gained quite the attention. You rarely showed your face but the body you inhabited was basically rented on the internet for whoever was interested.

A couple hundred people would join by this point, sending gifts and compliments as you got yourself off on camera. The vibrations and idea of that many people gawking at you was enough to break the dam, cumming over the comforter you laid upon.

You dizzily sat yourself up against a few pillows and curled a finger into your pussy, lapping at your fingers with your tongue to clean them. The chat went wild at the view, pouring out praises and fantasies.

A large tip came through and you nearly doubled over. There were at least 3-4 zeros behind the number received.

“Thank you so much, hellflamedhero. I take it you’re an Endeavor fan? What I would give to be between those tits of his.”

You, unknowing of the dilemma you just caused the number one hero on the other side of the screen.

“I’ll be logging off for the night but, it was always a pleasure to play with you all. See you soon!” and with that, the show was over and so was the fantasy.

Enji leaned back in his desk chair and palmed himself a little, a groan escaping his lips. He had been a fan of this particular camboy for a few weeks now, you were able to appeal to something deep within him. He’d be joining your cams whenever he could.

He rose and returned to his bed chambers for the evening, keeping the images of you fucking yourself for safe keeping.

You started another cam session for ‘premium’ members of your community a few nights later and of course, Enji bought right into it. You were riding a dildo suctioned to what looked to be your bathroom floor.

His jeans grew tighter at the sight, a hand going to palm himself through the rough denim and match the pace of your movements.

The camboy let out pitiful whimpers, begging a non-existent person for the high of an orgasm and Enji nearly came without actual contact to his cock.

You leaned forward to read the chat as they continued to bounce yourself but slower to not overwhelm your own mind.

Enji’s free hand typed faster than he could even process, “I would pay any money in the world to just get between those hips, if you’d allow me the pleasure.”

“Oh my dear hellflamehero, you coudl do anything to me for free. No payment necessary, you practically keep my lights on,” you laughed before a moan erupted from your mouth.

He rushed to unbutton his pants and pull his cock out, stroking himself at the replay of words in his head. His head leaned back, hips jerking into themselves as he imagined he was the one making this pretty camboy shake.

Soon you resumed your regular session, taking a few requests from the chat and following their wishes. “I bet you wish you were here, hm? Getting to make me feel like this,” You whined, back arching as you teased the audience.

Enji continued stroking his cock, immediately tipping you almost $7,000 with a private message directed to you and squeezed himself. You dipped to check the chat and eyes widening, not just from the amount of money but the message attached. “Here’s my private number. Send a message. I’d like to take you out sometime.”

—————————————

Sometime after that session, Enji received a message from you and began chatting.

Unknown (Possibly Camboy)

“Is it ok for me to ask who you are? You obviously know me form my camboy reputation.”

Enji

“Of course. It’s natural to be curious. I would prefer to introduce myself in person. When can you meet for coffee?”

Pretty Camboy

“I’m free this weekend, send me the details and I’ll be sure to meet you :)”

Enji

“Sounds good to me. Thank you.”

———————————————

The weekend rolled around and the two were off to the diner they agreed to meet at. You were very nervous, overthinking and assuming the worst. What could this customer possibly want that wouldn’t be provided over a session?

Enji arrived earlier to the diner and was sat in a booth toward the back to bring too much attention to himself, despite his stature.

Your breath got caught in your throat as you made eye contact with the number one hero. A brief smile flashed across his face to show no malice but you couldn’t help but be nervous.

You approached the booth and sat across from him, gazing over what was visible of his body. “It’s very nice to meet you, Endeavor.”

“The pleasure is all mine...?”

“Oh! My name is [Y/N] I don’t usually disclose it over my session but I suppose the number one hero could use the information,” you laughed a little.

“Very nice to meet you then, [Y/N]. You’re even more attractive in person, if I may say.”

You blushed and brushed off the compliment, “Thank you, thank you,” you rested your head on your hands, “I do have to ask - why did you request to meet me?”

Now it was Enji’s turn to blush but only slightly and drop his voice’s volume, “I have kept your little comments about me under my belt and...I’m very attracted to you.”

You widened their eyes and nodded as he spoke, “I’m honored and a bit embarrassed that you had to hear me say that.”

“No need to be embarrassed, especially if you knew the fantasies I have about you. Would you care to join me tonight?”

“Oh! I’d love to but I’m supposed to have a live show tonight...the viewers don’t like it if I reschedule.”

Enji let a little smirk dance across his lips, “I’m sure they wouldn’t mind if I joined, hm?” He brushed a piece of hair behind your ear and you nearly fainted.

You let out a nervous laugh and thought about it for a moment before nodding slowly. “I guess it wouldn’t hurt to mix up my content. You better let me play with these tits though, hm?”

He chuckled and crossed his arms, “I guess I’ll see you later? I’ve got to get on patrol soon. I’ll message you the address to my home soon.”

You pressed a quick kiss to his cheek before standing and bidding him farewell.

———————————————————

When the time to arrive at Enji’s came, the nerves were bubbling up again and they only seemed to get worse as your eyes met Shoto’s as the two entered the home.

Shoto squinted and looked over you, meeting the linked hands between you and his father. Enji had a loose grin on his lips, almost giddy. Thankfully Shoto wouldn’t be around long enough to find out whatever the two had under their sleeve or in that carrying case.

Once Shoto left, your phone began blowing up and you had to excuse yourself into another room to see what was happening. You unlocked their phone and sighed seeing the multiple texts from Sero’s number.

You began seeing red and immediately answered the call coming in, “Can I help you?”

“Hey [Y/N], was just tryna check in on you. Haven’t seen you around lately,” Sero mused.

“I think it’s for the better that we haven’t seen each other around. I moved near the city and got a new job. I don’t really have time to obsess over my past.”

“Woah, woah, who said I’m obsessing? I just miss you. I feel really bad for what I did. Do you think we can talk?”

“You lost the privilege to speak to me the night you fucking cheated on me. Get a fucking life and stop butting into mine.” You hung up the call and peaked out of the room you entered to accept the call

“Everything alright?” Enji questioned, seeing a change in mood from you.

“Not really but I’d rather enjoy my time with you, handsome. Let me get set up and I’m all yours.”

You disappeared into the larger room at the end of a hallway, assuming it was Enji’s and beginning to set up the equipment you brought.

Enji bent down to see what you were doing before you attacked his lips and pushed him back on the bed. You hovered over him and turned to face the camera, “I have a very special treat for my viewers. I’ll be fucking with this beefy dilf and he’ll be scrambling my brains, just for the show!”

You left gentle kisses wherever you could reach until you finally took Enji’s cock out of his pants. “Oh baby, you’re already so hard. I can tell you’re a shower. I don’t even think it’ll fit.”

“We’ll make it for, sweetheart.” Enji immediately yanked at the clothing covering your body and hummed once it was removed out of his way.

Your hands made quick work on his cock, spitting to create some lubricant and grinding against the tip, teasing around it.

He grabbed your hips and dug his nails into them, surely leaving marks. “A bit antsy aren’t you?” You slowly sank yourself down onto the large extremity, twitching at the stretch and length.

“You’re almost at the hilt, you’re doing so good. Just a little bit more for me?” He mused and you sunk down, slowly beginning to fuck onto the pro hero.

You ran your hands over his chest, squeezing the large breast like mounds on his chest and nearly toppling over when Enji began fucking into them. “H-hey! If you’re gonna do that, at least flip me over.”

With that, you were on your back and was being absolutely ravaged by the number one hero, a large hand groping your boobs and lips trailing over the skin of your neck.

You could barely process what was happening besides the pleasure coursing through your body, overwhelmed by the pure bliss you were feeling. No one had ever fucked you this good. It felt like a third eye was open.

Enji slowed his thrusting after a while and hovered over you, “Can I, uh, cum on you? Hate to waste this moment.”

You took a moment to nod and wiggled out from under him, immediately positioning yourself to be in view of the camera.

He stoked himself, using his free hand to finger you and get you their final act of pleasure. You almost immediately came from the first set of fingers entering you.

Enji let out a loud grunt before cumming all over your mouth.

“Smile for the camera, sweetheart”.