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crystalelemental · 5 months ago

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A while back, there was a Tumblr poll making the rounds asking gamers a simple question about which is worse, good gameplay/bad story, or bad gameplay/good story. At one point in time, I would've said obviously bad story is worse, because I was a pretentious little shit. As an adult, the answer seems a lot more obvious. If the gameplay is bad, it doesn't matter how good a story is, the full product is intolerable.

Anyway, completely unrelated, but I finished Final Fantasy 8.

FF8 is funny. I remember hating it in the day, and have long considered it the worst in the series, putting it below even FF2. Part of this was, as many in the current climate can identify, a matter of the big internet names of the time dunking on it, and teenagers are ever primed to recite opinions of people they look up to regardless of whether they understand it or not. So my main issue was "Story bad, bad game."

Having replayed it...yeah, no, FF8's story's actually really good. As someone who often considers themselves a character-centric person, FF8 is particularly nice because it really feels like a character-centric narrative.

Squall is great. Possibly my favorite protagonist right now? The story is primarily about connection and expression, centered on Squall's inability to just talk about what he's thinking and feeling with others. He's a fascinating protagonist because, despite all the edgelord accusations, Squall is deeply compassionate from minute one. His problem is not about caring or empathy. He cares greatly, and understands people pretty well. His problem is about opening up to others.

I think how the game presents it is my favorite part. This game involves a lot of internal monologuing from Squall, and his words often betray those thoughts. A good scene example is talking to Cid about protecting Balamb. When asked about his reasons, internally Squall has a laundry list of explanations - not wanting people to get hurt, caring about the people here, etc - but all he outwardly says is something to the effect of "It's my job." This complete disconnect really hits hard when we're switching between seeing his thoughts and seeing what he says.

Squall's reservations largely stem from the trauma of losing others; his parents first, then big sis Ellone. Squall doesn't want to make connections to people who could leave him. He's fearful of being hurt, and so makes himself lonely by refusing to open up to anyone. This is where his foil, Seifer, becomes more interesting.

Seifer is similarly lonely, but while Squall's is self-imposed, Seifer's is externally enforced. Squall is, for all his faults, well liked by his classmates and staff. He's not much for chatting, but his actions generally provide the appearance of a clever, polite, and caring young man. Seifer, comparatively, is an asshole and a moron. He demands to be seen by others and recognized, but everyone he engages with considers him intolerable. He approaches connection to others through authority and control, immediately taunting Zell and making threats about adding people to "the list." Seifer is alone because no one wants to deal with him.

What's interesting to me is that Seifer, much like Squall, cannot articulate himself either. He talks a lot, but he's not exactly honest. He keeps the truth of what he wants as his romantic secret, and when it comes to bear, it turns out his goal is...becoming the sorceress' knight. Now obviously, this isn't his goal. It's just what he has propped up in the moment. What he wanted is connection. Fujin and Raijin care about him, but he only reciprocates as far as his ability to boss them around. Ultimecia gives him a sense of connection, a sense of belonging and purpose, by carrying out her needs. He wants to belong just like Squall, and his reticence and lack of connection through peers puts him in a position he can be manipulated by someone.

Critically, Seifer mirror's Squall's "I don't want friends who will leave me" with this attitude. Fujin and Raijin aren't really important enough to be his friends. His sense of connection has to be bigger, more significant than these meaningless, small-time connections. We get to see this from Squall actively when Seifer is assumed dead. Squall freaks out, horrified at the prospect of people just talking about him loosely in past tense, and fearing what legacy he leaves behind. Squall wants friends, he's not opposed to connection. But he's convinced himself that this only counts if it's guaranteed forever; if it's something special and transcendent.

But...that's not most connections. Most connections are mundane and everyday. Most connections aren't guaranteed to be forever. And coming to terms with the fact that he does deeply care and doesn't want to lose them is his entire journey, and what makes the orphanage scene pop.

Okay, yes, it's a little goofy that all of them are from the same orphanage and no one remembers. It's a little silly to have the GFs be what removes memory. But I think that what it lacks in direct weight it makes up for thematically in spades. Squall doesn't remember these people from his past, in part due to this belief that his connections are more serious, but just as much because of trauma. He held a deep connection to Ellone, but even forgot about her, because the fear of losing others caused him to block out the specifics of those memories. Rinoa calls him on it later; he tries to brush off lack of recollection of something as a side-effect of the GFs, and is told "That's just an excuse, isn't it?" Squall hides away from these memories because they're hard to bear, and willingly severs his own connections for personal safety, symbolized by the Guardian Forces. It's why the ultimate GF summoned by Ultimecia is the one on his ring: Griever. Literally one who is grieving. That safety manifests as grief, a deep sorrow and loneliness for what is lost, unable to look ahead to what can still be. Time Compression, drawing everything to a single point, is collapsing that lived experience to that moment of trauma.

The other cast members don't get nearly the same development. This is very much Squall's personal journey. But I like Rinoa pretty well, as another who is deeply significant to the story. She's just got a fun personality. I could take or leave the rest. Irvine especially doesn't feel like he adds much. They're fine.

It really was staggering to come back to this game, feeling certain that my complaints were with the story being crap, and going...no, actually, this is really well done. That said, it may still be my least favorite in the series, because all the narrative significance in the world will not fix the gameplay.

I'm going to avoid specifics. You probably already know. But the big question that was raised for me here was...what is the intended first playthrough experience here?

The biggest draw, the thing that, as a player, you're going to go for, is GF skills. They require skill points obtained after battle, and you'll want a bunch of different ones, since they augment stats. So more than likely, you might stop and grind some out. Which results in EXP yields, which increases your level, which makes encounters harder before you have spells to Junction, etc. Playing this game like you would any other is immediately and severely punished, with no indication of why or how to avoid it. How are you to know that Card avoids EXP? How are you to know enemies scale to your level? How do you figure any of this out? It feels like a game that requires external knowledge. I've been watching someone play FF5, and they talked about FF8, saying "if you just beat the enemy then they're dead and you continue playing," but man I tried that when I first picked it up. It resulted in a softlock where I could not beat anything I came up against because I didn't understand Junctioning or level scaling. You kinda have to engage with these shitty systems. The remastered version is playable, but only because it has 3x speed and the ability to turn off all random encounters, which is the only reason I made it past Esther, which was about to drive me insane.

I feel like I at least somewhat understand the general vision at certain points in the game. Tutorial bosses all having Cure is a clever way to teach players to use the spells obtained from enemies to manage, and this kind of tutorial continues through the fake president having Esuna to draw while spamming status. There's a late-game boss in Ultimecia's Castle that is basically immune to damage, except for Demi, which can be drawn from it, and another boss that mentions "fearing elements it doesn't use," and it has Tornado and casts lightning, so you hit it with Fire or Ice (or others). Those are neat systems! I kinda like those! But scaled levels and junctioning magic to stats and having limited casts that if you use them the stat boost for junctioning goes down...it's doing too much. It's overly ambitious, and the system starts to break down very early, around the time you find out there are like 50 spells and only 32 slots, and oops some of that stuff you drew is basically useless now.

That's not to say combat is the only thing that drives me nuts. Junctioning also results in several situations where the party changes, but doesn't offer the "swap junction" option, so you have to do that shit manually. Looking at you, Laguna sections. Battle of the Gardens was the worst, because there are like four goddamn party transitions that result in needing to swap junctions, and none of those sections involve fights, but you wouldn't know that unless you'd done it already. It just eats so much time. And all of this is around constant random encounters you can't kill because level scaling, and hard to navigate PS1 maps where I can't tell what is and isn't traversible half the damned time.

FF8 feels like a more extreme FF7. I came away from that game feeling like the story was much better than I recalled, but I considered it the game I'd least like to replay. FF8 is the same but even moreso in both directions. I really enjoyed this story, it's one of my favorites, but I think I'd rather saw my arms off than play it again. So it is...very hard to consider this anything but my bottom of the barrel. It can be a beautifully presented narrative all it wants, but as a wise man once said: "It's a video game! I play the game to play the game!"

#final fantasy 8

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angelosearch · 20 days ago

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Congratulations on finishing Chaos Theory! To celebrate this happy occasion and all of your works thus far, I chose ten random lines from your stories to see how well you know your own writing. 😉

Who said the line and which fic is it from?

As a bonus, please give us a fun fact or favorite memory about each fic!

"It's been a privilege cooking with you today." "How about you come live with me?" "Please forgive me, Rinoa said this wasn't your style but… I guess I was just being a little selfish." "Do you like Behemoth burgers or are you more of a Thrustaevis wings kind of guy?" "You told me to stop you if you did this again." "I just want this moment. I don't need to know what happens in the next one." "She gets some hot dog before I do? Seriously?!" "You will fix my Rinoa under the threat of death!" "That's why I have to get Chickenwuss off my squad!" "You know I care about you, right?"

This is... LITERALLY THE COOLEST ASK I HAVE EVER RECEIVED!!!! thank you so much 😭 I am so excited to play this game!! Let's see...

"It's been a privilege cooking with you today."

The Weiner Takes it All! These are the lunch ladies in Balamb Garden sadly packing up the hot dogs, per Squall's orders during the Garden Battle. I cry-laughed writing this scene in particular. One of my favorite forms of humor is taking very silly things absurdly seriously and this part of the fic was definitely that!

"How about you come live with me?"

This took me a minute but I think it's from Eyes of the Storm? If it is, Rinoa said this line! That fic remains my favorite of my works. I started writing it as a 5k AU... and then it got three times as long. WHOOPS. I wrote most of it in 4 days and actually pulled two (nonconsecutive) all-nighters working on it because it had that tight of a hold on me.

*goes through the rest of these and comes back*

Wait. WAIT. No, this has to be from The Ballad of Ma Dincht! This is what Muadine says to Zell when she decides to adopt him. 😭❤️ Honestly, I forget about this fic a lot! Not because I dislike it or anything, but it was a very quick piece to write and I published a lot of other stuff around the same time. BUT writing this definitely got me interested in all the other SeeDs adoption (or lack there of) stories. Just more projects I want to tackle.

"Please forgive me, Rinoa said this wasn't your style but… I guess I was just being a little selfish."

This is from August 23, and the line is said by Ellone. I really didn't think I'd have time to write Squall something for his birthday, but this one struck me at the last moment! I guess the fun fact here is that I looked back in my developmental psychology textbook to make sure his characterization at each age made sense.

"Do you like Behemoth burgers or are you more of a Thrustaevis wings kind of guy?"

Haha, awww! A Laguna and Squall bonding moment from A New Beginning! This fic is a Star Wars and FFVIII mashup. I remember watching the last episode of Star Wars: The Bad Batch on Father's Day and thinking that Star Wars is all about family/parents/legacy. Then I was like WAIT FATHER SON FIC WITH SQUALL AND LAGUNA AND STAR WARS LET'S GO!!! I tried really hard to get chapter 1 done that same day but I think I posted a few hours after Father's Day.

"You told me to stop you if you did this again."

Chaos Theory: Rewind, and this is Xu, admonishing Quistis (or who she thinks is Quistis 😏) for being with Seifer. This fic is a spin-off of Chaos Theory entirely following Quistis's perspective. Rewind was supposed to be just a chapter of Chaos Theory but it got too long!

"I just want this moment. I don't need to know what happens in the next one."

Oh damn, I'm not sure! This is a classic Rinoa line, so classic I feel like she could have said this in most of my fics! I feel like it's likely Chaos Theory or Eyes of the Storm. Okay, I think I'm leaning toward Eyes of the Storm, but an earlier quote was that and I don't think you'd repeat fics... UNLESS THE QUOTE I ASSOCIATED WITH EYES OF THE STORM WAS WRONG!!! *goes to correct*

Lmao I already gave a fun fact about Eyes of the Storm but I'll give another one: Rinoa's library job is based on my own experience working in my college's library. I worked there for two and a half years as a circulation desk assistant and then manager, and also as a helper at the research help desk. (Gotta say, learning how to use those research databases to assist other students was a great skill to learn and it's so useful to me now.)

Particularly, there was an instance when I was working as an overnight manager and when I woke up at 3 am to go to my shift, I had an email saying campus was closed due to snow. Now, I went to school in Ithaca, NY, and that place never closed for weather. This was a SERIOUS snow. And because the campus was closed, the library should be closed... but it wasn't. I hiked across campus in at least 2 feet of snow which was still falling. I remember feeling like a Yukon explorer or something, muddling through in the small hours of the morning. When I got to the library, the stairs to the entrance were nothing but a mound and I had to climb it. I had to get the few straggler students to leave and lock up the place... and then, hike back to my apartment and go to sleep at 5 am. I think they reopened campus at noon.

ANYWAY, in Eyes of the Storm Rinoa contends with snow storms while working at the library, something I have very specific experience with 😆

"She gets some hot dog before I do? Seriously?!"

100% Angelo Reverse! Zell is complaining because sad Squall gave the last of his hot dog to sad Angelo as they are both worrying about Rinoa in a coma in the beginning of disc 3. Angelo Reverse is one of my faves because it has so much of my dogs in it ❤️ a lot of Angelo's more playful interactions with Squall are based on how my husband plays with our dog, Duey.

"You will fix my Rinoa under the threat of death!"

Heeheehee, Balamb Harbor Playhouse! Stage!Squall is threatening Stage!Odine in Stage!Esthar, and Squall is in the audience, mortified. I think this was my third fic I published and it was my first try at an all-humor approach. It's the FFVIII version of Ember Island Players (Avatar the Last Airbender). I wrote this fic in a day and I was laughing to myself the entire time.

"That's why I have to get Chickenwuss off my squad!"

Ah, Final Fantasy VIII: The Musical! Seifer is singing the "Gaston part" of the song introducing Squall, which is based on "Belle"! "Look there he goes that guy is cold, no question. / Mean and distant, that’s not all: / Never part of any crowd, / Yet he is strong and proud. / No denying he’s a funny guy, that Squall." Originally the first song in this fic was going to be Selphie singing a version of "I Think I'm Going to Like it Here" from Annie but I decided Squall needed top billing, even though he's not going to sing himself for awhile...

I haven't added anything to this in a long time but I promise you it lives in my head rent free. I have a playlist with all my planned songs and a whole doc outlining it and several songs later in the plot written and ready. I just need to be in a certain mood to work on it!

"You know I care about you, right?"

Quistis trying to talk Seifer down in the Chapter (I want to say 7?) "Live From Timber" in Chaos Theory! In the Chaos Theory timeline, Quistis and Seifer come together because Squall isn't there! Seifer is lonely and lost without his rival, and the feelings Quistis has for Squall in the game sort of shift to Seifer without him there.

Well, there it is! How'd I do? I didn't look at anything but my list of titles... hopefully I got it right! Thanks for this fun trip down memory lane ❤️

#answered asks #fanfiction #ffviii chaos theory

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moodymelanist · 2 years ago

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My Fire Was Fate With You

so... instead of finishing the many, MANY wips I have floating around, I decided to go for a little genderbent acotar action. hope you all enjoy female!cassian and nesta<3

Summary: Nesta lets Feyre set her up on (yet another) blind date, but her sister fails to mention the most important detail: her friend Cass is a woman.

(Or, the one where female!Cassian and Nesta get together)

Word Count: 4,445 words

Read on AO3 here!

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Nesta

Nesta sighed heavily once she realized her phone was ringing in the middle of her workout. Sighing, she changed her treadmill settings so she was walking at a reasonable pace instead of sprinting so hard that she worried her sports bra would snap.

“Hello?” she answered, hoping she didn’t sound too out of breath.

“Hey, Nesta!” Feyre replied. Her sister sounded way too chipper for six in the evening, so Nesta figured she must be at happy hour or something. “How’s it going?”

“I’m wonderful, you’re wonderful,” Nesta responded, rolling her eyes with affection. She loved her sister, but she knew Feyre only tended to call when she wanted something instead of just texting. “Get to the point, please. I’m at the gym.”

“Fine, fine,” Feyre agreed with a laugh. “I volunteered you for a blind date with one of my friends.”

“Absolutely not,” Nesta immediately shot it down. “Do you not remember how the last ones went? Because I do.”

Feyre had tried to set Nesta up with her friend Lucien a few months prior, which had been so awkward that Nesta had texted Elain begging her to show up at the restaurant to save her. Lucien had taken one look at Elain and declared on the spot that it was love at first sight, and Elain – instead of sticking to the script and acting like she’d had a serious emergency – had shooed Nesta away from the table and taken her spot instead. They’d been going steady ever since, and Nesta couldn’t even find it in her to be mad at her sister for finding her soul mate or whatever. She and Lucien were just so clearly made for each other that the incident was funny instead of infuriating.

After that, though, there was Azriel. She hadn’t met another man in such dire need of therapy since her last conversation with her father, and considering Owain had been six feet under for years, she supposed Azriel could take the top spot. She hadn’t spoken to Feyre for a week after that, and she’d made her sister promise to stop trying to use her matchmaking skills.

Skills had been a generous word. Clearly, so had that promise.

“Come on, Nesta,” Feyre wheedled. Nesta could practically hear her pouting over the phone. “I know I promised, but Cass is nothing like those other guys!”

Nesta just sighed and turned her treadmill settings up slightly. She was clearly going to need the extra workout. “Oh yeah? What’s he like, then?”

“That would defeat the purpose of a blind date,” Feyre told her, deflecting the question with ease. “Just give it a chance, please? I absolutely promise it’ll be the last blind date I’ll send you on.”

“What’s in it for me?”

“...A chance at finding true love and happiness?”

“That’s rich, even for you.”

“Ugh. I’ll pay for your dinner?”

“Fine. Tell me when and where to be.”

“Yay! I promise you won’t regret it!”

“Whatever. I’m going to finish my workout.”

“I love you so much, Nesta! I’ll Venmo you.”

“Love you too, but only if you Zelle me. Bye.”

Nesta sighed as she hung up the phone, already feeling drained. The things she’d do for her sister never failed to amaze her.

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True to her word, Feyre sent Nesta more than enough to cover the dinner she’d coerced Nesta into attending. She also sent Nesta over all the details for the blind date, which was how Nesta found herself at one of the nicer restaurants in downtown Velaris a few days later. She’d put in a little more effort than usual since Feyre had seemed so eager for her to say yes, deciding to leave her hair down, put on a little more makeup than usual, and wear her favorite sweater dress and boots.

When she walked into the restaurant, there were a few people waiting around, but no one that matched her usual type. She pulled out her phone and checked the time – it was 7:23, so her date had a few minutes to arrive still – and would’ve been content to wait, but it seemed the universe had other plans.

“Nesta?”

Nesta turned at the sound of her name and her jaw dropped of its own accord. Feyre hadn’t given too many details about who she was setting Nesta up with this time, but her sister had failed to inform her of one very important detail.

The person standing in front of her was another woman.

Granted, she was a very attractive woman, but she was still a woman. Her hair wasn’t as long as Nesta’s, but her curls looked soft and shiny underneath the restaurant lighting. She was wearing a patterned blue shirt tucked into a pair of dark blue pants, and she’d left so many buttons unfastened that Nesta wondered just how much faith she had in the shirt.

“Hi,” she said with a grin. Nesta only had to tilt her head up slightly to make eye contact, which was a feat in and of itself considering she was 5’8. “I’m Cassandra, but everyone calls me Cass for short. You’re even more gorgeous in person.”

Nesta felt like her brain was short-circuiting, but she managed to return Cass’ handshake before introducing herself. Feyre had to be playing a joke on her — right? “Right. Um. I’m Nesta. Would you excuse me for a second?”

She shoved her coat into the other woman’s arms and dug her phone out of her purse, already dialing her sister’s number as she stalked her way to the bathroom. This was low, even for Feyre, and she was determined to give her sister a piece of her mind the moment that phone call connected.

“Hello?” Feyre answered on the second ring.

“Feyre Lynette Archeron,” Nesta hissed into the phone, her heart pounding in her chest. “What the fuck?”

“Hello to you too, Nesta Rhea Archeron,” Feyre replied pleasantly, like Nesta wasn’t ready to throttle her through the screen. “You must’ve met Cass. What do you think?”

“What do I think?” Nesta snapped, trying hard to keep her voice down. She didn’t know if anyone else was in the bathroom, and she didn’t want any more people overhearing this conversation than necessary. “I think you can go fuck yourself. This isn’t funny.”

“I’m not trying to be funny, Nesta.” Feyre took a deep breath like she was trying to keep her own temper in check. “I was just…”

Nesta pinched the bridge of her nose. “You were just what?”

“I was just trying to help,” Feyre responded. She sounded like she was gritting her teeth, and Nesta felt a glimmer of satisfaction that her sister was just as irritated as she was. “You’ve always had shit luck with men. You don’t even sound like you like them very much, not even in a ‘haha I hate men but at least the dick is good’ kind of way like the rest of us. Have you ever considered that maybe… you’re just not that into them?”

“That’s ridiculous,” Nesta seethed, indignant. Of course she liked men. Maybe she wasn’t as touchy-feely as Feyre was with Rhys, and maybe she didn’t enjoy sex with her boyfriends as much as Elain seemed to with Lucien — was that a crime? “You need to stay out of my fucking business.”

“I wasn’t trying to piss you off, I promise,” Feyre told her. “I just thought maybe you’d do better with another option, and I didn’t want to scare you off by asking you ahead of time.”

“That’s a really strange way of saying I’m sorry,” Nesta snarked. “I’m not gay, and if you’d bothered to run this by me ahead of time, you could’ve saved me and your friend both our time.”

“Come on, Nesta,” Feyre attempted to cajole her. “Cass is really cool! She’s hilarious, she’s smart, she can cook, and she’s gorgeous. If you don’t want it to be a date, you could at least try being her friend.”

“She came here expecting a date, and you didn’t even do her the decency of telling her that I’m not into women,” Nesta whisper-yelled, any goodwill Feyre may have earned rapidly evaporating once again. “You owe both of us apologies, Feyre. I hope you’re happy, because this is the last blind date you’re ever setting me up on.”

It was supremely satisfying to hang up on Feyre after that, and Nesta took a few more moments to collect herself in the bathroom before she could even think of leaving to face Cass again. What was she supposed to even say? Sorry, my sister thought I was a closeted lesbian and decided to set me up on a date with a woman without telling me. Do you want any appetizers?

The entire situation was preposterous. Nesta had never had any reason to question her sexuality, and she wasn’t going to start now. Surely everyone admired the female form – it was more symmetrical than the male one, that was for sure. And a lot of people were like Nesta when it came to physical touch, something she blamed on her parents for not being nearly as affectionate as she needed growing up. That didn’t mean she wasn’t straight.

Either way, she needed to get herself together. She was Nesta Archeron, for fuck’s sake — she’d survived law school, so she could certainly survive whatever painfully awkward interaction she was going to have. She allowed herself one more deep breath before turning and walking out of the bathroom entirely, easily spotting Cass still waiting for her near the entrance.

Cass perked up once she noticed Nesta had returned from the bathroom, but her excitement quickly dimmed once she noticed the look on Nesta’s face. “I take it Feyre didn’t tell you everything?”

“She failed to mention a few things, yeah,” Nesta replied shortly. She forced herself to take a deep breath before meeting the other woman’s gaze. “Sorry. That’s not your fault, and I shouldn’t be taking it out on you.”

“It’s fine,” Cass answered. She put her hands in her pockets just for something to do, and Nesta struggled not to be obvious about how she was tracking the way those golden brown muscles flexed in the process.

They stood in awkward silence for a few moments before Cass took a deep breath and handed Nesta back her coat, clearly preparing herself to say something. Whatever it was, Nesta could at least do her the courtesy of hearing her out. No matter how mad she was at her sister, she didn’t need to take it out on some random stranger.

“Look, I’m not going to pressure you into anything or whatever,” Cass said, her hazel eyes soft as she looked at Nesta. “But we’re already here, right? Let’s just have a nice dinner and we can go our separate ways after if you really hate me so much.”

“Okay,” Nesta replied after a minute. She resolutely ignored the way Cass’ answering smile made her palms feel clammy. “And for the record, I don’t hate you. My sister just can’t help minding other people’s business.”

“Yeah, my brothers are the same way,” Cass responded with a little laugh. “My entire family, really. Fucking meddlers.”

They made their way over to the hostess after that, Cass standing back to let Nesta go first as they made their way to their table. They’d been lucky enough to get a secluded little booth, and Nesta sighed happily once she realized she realized she was right next to one of the vents. She’d always ran cold, especially when she got nervous, and she needed all the extra help she could get right now.

“So,” Cass said once they’d ordered drinks and an appetizer.

“So,” Nesta replied, the nerves coming back with a vengeance. Cass looked even more beautiful under the mood lighting of the restaurant, and it was almost too easy to get lost in those hazel eyes. “How do you know Feyre?”

“We go to the same kickboxing class,” Cass answered easily. “I’m how she met Rhys, actually.”

Nesta vaguely remembered hearing about this. “Oh, that’s right. So I guess the real question is how do you know Rhys?”

“He’s basically my brother,” Cass responded with a wry tilt of her mouth. “My dad was never in the picture, and my mom died when I was in middle school. Rhys’ family took me in.”

“Oh,” Nesta said. “I’m glad you had them.”

“Yeah, me too.” Cass took a deep sip of her cocktail before changing the topic. “I would ask how you know Feyre, but you don’t seem like you like stupid questions.”

Nesta laughed despite herself. “I don’t, but I’ll humor you anyway. She’s my youngest sister, and definitely the most annoying out of the three of us.”

“Cut her some slack,” Cass joked, mirroring Nesta’s smile. “You know youngest siblings can’t help it.”

“I wish she would try,” Nesta joked right back. “You wouldn’t believe just how bad she is once she decides to meddle.”

Cass just smirked in a way that made Nesta’s body tense with anticipation. “Well, I can’t say I’m complaining.”

They took a break from their conversation once their appetizer arrived, taking a few minutes to order their entrees and dig into the food before them. Nesta found herself staring too long at Cass, especially her fingers as she popped a piece of calamari into her mouth, and desperately fought the blush that was taking over her cheeks. If Cass noticed, she thankfully didn’t say anything.

“So what do you do?” Nesta asked curiously.

“I’m a teacher,” Cass answered proudly. Fuck, Nesta really liked that. “I teach world history to a bunch of hormonal high schoolers, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. How about you?”

“I’m a lawyer,” Nesta responded. “I’ve been at my firm for about four years now.”

Cass reached for another piece of calamari. “No time to date, then?”

“What?” Nesta asked, confused. She reached for her own piece just for something to do, flushing again when she realized Cass was tracking her movements the same way Nesta had done to her only a few minutes ago. “I… are we not on a date right now?”

“So you’re counting this as a date, then?” Cass fired back, amused. “And don’t mind me. I’m just trying to figure out a good explanation for why you don’t have a girlfriend.”

“I – no,” Nesta replied. Cass was clearly having fun with the new topic, but Nesta wouldn’t let herself be so easily flustered. “Feyre’s an asshole. I’m not into women.”

“You sure?” Cass leaned forward with a grin and Nesta had to fight to keep her eyes away from all the skin suddenly on display. “I don’t think she would have set us up if that was true, sweetheart.”

“Don’t call me that,” Nesta said with a scowl. Based on the look of pure glee on Cass’ face, Nesta knew immediately that it had been the wrong thing to say, and she resigned herself to hearing the nickname for the rest of the evening. “And what happened to not pressuring me into anything?”

“Nobody’s pressuring you,” Cass replied, the portrait of serenity as she leaned back into her chair. “But you’ve been looking at me a little too much to say you don’t like women.”

“Because I don’t,” Nesta insisted. She took a sip of her cocktail and let the alcohol settle her nerves a little bit. “I’ve dated men my whole life!”

“Yeah, because that’s the determining factor,” Cass replied with a playful roll of her eyes. “Case closed, your honor.”

They took another break from the conversation to dig into their food as it arrived – eggplant parm for Cass, and spaghetti and meatballs for Nesta – but Nesta knew the reprieve wouldn’t last for long. Cass was clearly having fun needling Nesta, and despite her best efforts, Nesta would admit this maybe sort of date was more fun than she’d been expecting.

“All I’m saying is that you shouldn’t knock it until you’ve tried it,” Cass said as she twirled spaghetti on her fork. “I mean, I didn’t figure out that I was lesbian until my freshman year of college. I wasted so much time trying to convince myself otherwise.”

“What?” Nesta replied, shocked that Cass could be so open about this. “But – what do you mean?”

“I hated men touching me,” Cass answered. “I mean, I didn’t mind when my friends touched me or whatever. But don’t even get me started on how much the sex fucking sucked.”

“Sucked…how?” Nesta asked cautiously, suddenly hanging onto every word. This was hitting a little too close to home for her, but she didn’t want to examine yet just how close it was.

“I mean, if you hate being touched by men, no shit you’re not gonna enjoy fucking them,” Cass responded bluntly. She took a quick pause to take a bite of her food. “Don’t get me wrong, nobody ever forced me to do anything or whatever, but it just felt like something I was supposed to enjoy when it always felt like more of a chore.”

“But doesn’t everyone think that?” Nesta followed up, confused. She knew she’d grown up with some pretty antiquated ideals thanks to her mother, but she’d always just assumed her female friends had been exaggerating about how much they liked having sex for the sake of their partner’s egos. “Happy husband, happy life and all that.”

Cass stared at her for a few moments like she couldn’t believe what Nesta was saying. “Oh, sweetheart. No .”

“It’s not even your business,” Nesta replied, suddenly embarrassed. What the hell was she doing, talking to a stranger about her sex life in the middle of a nice restaurant? “I don’t even know why we’re talking about this.”

“I think you know,” Cass told her seriously. At the sheer panic that must have been coming off Nesta, she abruptly changed tactics, that familiar smirk coming back as she added, “but in case you don’t, I’d be delighted to educate you.”

“Shut up.” Nesta studiously ignored the sound of Cass laughing as she aggressively dug into her food, cheeks burning all the while. “I have a professional degree. I don’t need more educating.”

“I’m just saying,” Cass continued to tease her, still laughing. “As a teacher, I think you’d benefit from a more hands-on approach.”

“With lines like that, I’d hate to see your performance reviews,” Nesta retorted with a roll of her eyes.

“Trust me, they’re all glowing,” Cass fired back with a smug look. “I’d be more than happy to show you my references.”

“Oh my God,” Nesta huffed, laughing again. “That’s fucking awful.”

Cass just waggled her eyebrows, and Nesta noticed she had a scar cutting through the right one that only added to her appeal. “That’s the only time I’ll let you put fucking and awful in the same sentence when it comes to me. Enjoy it while it lasts.”

The rest of the meal passed quickly, the two of them bantering back and forth and keeping the laughing going for the rest of the meal. Cass even grabbed the bill before Nesta could pretend to reach for her wallet.

“You know, for someone who won’t see what’s right in front of her, I had a really good time tonight,” Cass said once they left the restaurant. They’d both parked in the same garage, so it made sense to keep walking together until they reached their cars.

“I… actually had a pretty good time, too,” Nesta admitted. It was true – Cass was hilarious, and she had a way of lowering Nesta’s defenses with every well-timed joke. It definitely didn’t hurt that she was easy on the eyes, and she’d given Nesta a lot to think about tonight even if they never saw each other again.

“Enough to hang out again?” Cass asked hopefully.

“Maybe,” Nesta answered, looking down at her feet. It was almost too hard to look at Cass, almost like staring at the sun for too long. “You gave me a lot to think about.”

“Playing hard to get,” Cass replied, her voice light. “I see how it is, sweetheart.”

Nesta just laughed as they walked inside the garage, quickly making their way toward the elevator. “I’m being serious! I really do have a lot to think about.”

“Don’t hurt yourself with all that thinking,” Cass teased with her own laugh. She maneuvered herself so she was standing in front of Nesta, those hazel eyes suddenly so close that Nesta could see the flecks of green in them. “Can I kiss you?”

Nesta swallowed hard, her heart pounding in her chest so loudly she wondered if Cass could hear it. “Um…”

“I’m a big girl,” Cass said with the ghost of a smile. “It won’t hurt my feelings if you say no. I was just wondering if it would help with all that thinking you have to do.”

“I’m not saying no,” Nesta eventually replied. What would it hurt to say yes, anyway? She could easily prove Cass – and Feyre – wrong and go on with her life as usual. “Just… go slow.”

“I can do slow,” Cass agreed, and then she was leaning in before Nesta had the chance to second-guess herself.

Nesta’s eyes fluttered shut of their own accord once their lips touched, and it was like every nerve ending was suddenly lit up. Cass’ lips were warm and soft and gentle as they moved against Nesta’s, and Nesta found herself stepping closer so she could feel the other woman’s body pressed against hers. She’d never felt like this kissing any of the guys she’d dated, especially not the first one, and it was all she could do to keep her hands to herself once she felt Cass’ tongue against hers.

Oh. Oh. Maybe she had been missing out all this time. If the kissing felt this good, maybe she could finally understand why Feyre and Elain were constantly throwing themselves at their boyfriends.

Cass pressed one last kiss to Nesta’s lips before pulling away, her hazel eyes warily assessing Nesta’s face. “Good?”

“Yeah,” Nesta eventually answered, trying her best to pull herself together and failing miserably. Fuck. She wanted more, and she would do anything to get it. “Actually… really good.”

“Yeah?” Cass replied, her smile slowly growing wider the longer they looked at each other. “Maybe Feyre had a point, huh?”

“You don’t have to be so smug about it,” Nesta grumbled. God, Feyre was going to be insufferable once Nesta told her about this.

“I think I’m allowed to be smug about it,” Cass fired back, her smile turning into more of a smirk. “It’s not every day that you’re someone’s gay awakening.”

“Just shut up and kiss me again,” Nesta ordered.

Cass thankfully didn’t waste any more time bickering. She leaned in for another kiss, and Nesta let herself actually touch Cass the way she wanted to a few minutes ago. One hand moved up to cup the side of Cass’ face, while the other slid its way down to her hip, tentatively exploring the curve of her body. It felt… good.

“Do you want to come back to mine?” Nesta blurted out before she could stop herself.

Cass lit up like a Christmas tree. “Yeah, definitely. What floor are you parked on?”

They held hands the entire walk back to their cars, and the kiss Cass left her with had Nesta’s lips tingling all the way back to her apartment. Thankfully, she’d taken the time to clean up before she left for the date, so when they eventually made their way upstairs, Nesta didn’t have to awkwardly scramble to clean anything.

“Nice place,” Cass said, looking around with clear appreciation.

“Thanks,” Nesta responded. She felt a little exposed having Cass here – she almost never took people back to her place – but she shoved it down before shifting into hostess mode. “Do you want anything to drink?”

“Just water’s okay,” Cass answered with a smile.

Nesta headed toward the kitchen to grab them both something to drink, and when she came back into the living room, Cass had slipped out of her coat and shoes to wait for her on the couch. Nesta did the same once she got close enough, gently placing the glasses on the coffee table before making herself comfortable and draping her legs across the other woman’s lap.

Instead of immediately pouncing on one another, they ended up settling on the couch to talk first. Nesta had never connected so quickly with someone, and her sister’s assessment of Cass rang true the entire time. Not only was she even funnier when they were behind closed doors, but Nesta found herself gravitating toward Cass with every gentle sweep of her thumb against Nesta’s ankle.

When they did finally pounce on one another… Nesta didn’t think she had the proper words to describe her experience. She’d never been so relaxed and exhausted at the same time, but she wasn’t so tired that she forgot that she owed her sister a text. Reaching over Cass’ equally relaxed frame, she dug around for her phone and pulled it out to send a few quick texts Feyre’s way.

Nesta Archeron, 1:19 AM

Hey

I owe you a huge apology.

You were right and I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. I know you were just trying to help, and I’m sorry for freaking out.

Anyways. I think I might be lesbian?

It was the first time Nesta had said the words out loud to somebody else, and her heart pounded as she pressed send for the final time. It felt like so many things were suddenly making sense, and while she couldn’t believe she’d spent so much time trying to convince herself she liked men, she knew it was part of the journey.

Besides, if the journey ended with the number of orgasms Nesta had had tonight, it had been more than worth it.

Surprisingly, Feyre texted back within a few minutes of Nesta’s last text delivering. Unsurprisingly, she was even smugger than Cass had been after their first kiss.

Feyre Archeron, 1:21 AM

YES I KNEW IT !!!!!!

Seriously so happy for you though Nesta !!!!!

I love u and thanks for trusting me with this !!!!

& it’s all good about earlier. I’ll hold back on more I told you so's if you buy me breakfast tomorrow<3

Assuming you can walk once Cass is through with you 😉

Nesta just snorted before she sent Feyre a selfie, complete with both her and Cass flipping off the camera.

#acotar #acosf #nessian #nesta archeron #cassian #female!cassian #lesbian!nessian #alternate universe #moodymelanistwrites #⭐️

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suleikashideaway · 2 months ago

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Updated October 3, 2024

Chapter 15: Precipice

Chapter length: 4,017

Chapter Summary:

On top of it all, why did Laguna have to look at him like that? It made his skin crawl, and distracted him immensely when now, more than ever, he needed his wits about him. He was certain Laguna was going to pass him a handwritten note or something equally stupid. A low panic hummed through his chest at the thought.

—

My poor baby Squall 🥺 He can’t be dealing with Laguna shenanigans right now. There just isn’t time for that!!

Also featured in this chapter is one of my favorite scenes between Squall and Quistis, and arguably the incitement of their friendship. Of all the arcs in this fic, the Squall & Quistis friendship is incredibly dear to me. I just adore them both. (And I’m glad to be getting this out around Quisty’s birthday since I don’t think I’ll have time to write anything for her character week! Wah)

More about Time Will Tell under the cut!

Fic Summary: Carefree, fun-loving, passionate, free spirited, can also mean impulsive, reckless, obsessive, thoughtless. Rinoa Heartilly is learning the dangers of her own personality, and who she will become if she continues down this path.

Squall Leonhart is fully awake now, no longer a pawn in someone else’s plan. He’s ready to take charge of his own fate. But what if fate has other plans?

Rating: M

Warnings: No archive warnings apply

Chapters: 15/? (expected 60)

Fandom: Final Fantasy VIII

Relationships: Rinoa Heartilly/Squall Leonhart, Selphie Tilmitt/Irvine Kinneas, Zell Dincht/Library Girl, Rinoa Heartilly & Selphie Tilmitt, Ellone & Squall Leonhart, Squall Leonhart & Quistis Trepe, Squall Leonhart & Irvine Kinneas, Ellone & Rinoa Heartilly

Characters: Rinoa Heartilly, Squall Leonhart, Cid Kramer, Edea Kramer, Selphie Tilmitt, Irvine Kinneas, Zell Dincht, Quistis Trepe, Library Girl, Laguna Loire, Ellone, Kiros Seagill, Ward Zabac, Fury Carraway, Seifer Almasy, Original Characters

Tags: Angst with a happy ending, Fluff in early chapters, Self discovery, Navigating relationships, Depression, Anxiety, PTSD, Codependency, Sexual content, Drug & Alcohol use, Canon-typical violence, Debunking a fan theory, Friendship, Fandom blind, Post-canon, What is time anyway, Fate & Destiny, Tags to be added

#ffviii time will tell #ffviii fanfiction #ffviii #ff8 #final fantasy #fanfiction #final fantasy fanfiction #rinoa heartilly #squall leonheart #angst with a happy ending

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gardengalwrites · 7 months ago

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Things That I Would Like To Know About My Fellow Writers

Thank you for the tag, @angelosearch! I tag everyone who's interested in participating. :)

Greatest literary inspirations: When I first discovered the FFVIII fandom in the early 2000s, I was especially captivated by four writers:

Ms Starlight

Lunatique

Ripley a.k.a. RipleyReprised

xahra99

I essentially learned how to write by reading their fanfics over and over again. It's hard to express just how deeply their storytelling has impacted, influenced, and inspired me. I wouldn't be where I am today without them.

If any of you beautiful souls ever read this, thank you for sharing your gift with the world! 💖 Last book I read: The Princess Bride by William Goldman.

Things in my current fandom I want to read but I don't want to write: All things Squinoa.

Things in my current fandoms I want to write but I think nobody would be interested in them but me:

I would love to continue writing the universe in which Xu and Zell become unexpected Best Friends Forever.

I am interested in developing the backstories of NPCs.

I want to try more stories in Second Person POV.

You can recognize my writing by: Happy endings.

My most controversial take (current fandom): I have never quite accepted Quistis as "The Ice Queen." 👀

Top three favorite tropes: This is almost impossible to answer. It honestly depends on my mood. I am always down for romance in any genre!

What’s your current writing mood (10 – super motivated and churning out words like crazy, 0 – in a complete rut): I am at a carefully controlled 8.

Share a fandom frustration: None at the moment. I love this fandom. 🌹

#tag post #tumblr mutuals #about me

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madam-kumo · 1 year ago

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Identity V characters as Music

(I did skip some because I had no idea what to do for them. Also Major spoiler warning)

Masterlist

Survivors

Emily Dyer (doctor)

Nurses Office by Melanie Martinez.

For obvious reasons

Freddy Riley (Lawyer)

The Fine Print by The Stupendium

He mentions in his backstory that he hopes to find a better job than the "menial" job he has with a low wage.

Kreacher Pierson (Thief)

Smooth Criminal by Michael Jackson

He literally steals parts from the ciphers.

Emma Woods (Gardener)

Dandelions by Ruth B.

A happy song for a happy character. (Emma is literally so cute, she deserves it)

Servais Le Roy (The magician)

Circus by Brittney Spears

Where do we find magicians? A circus...

Martha Behamfil (Coordinator)

Bang! by AJR

Martha has a gun. That's it.

Fiona Gilman (Priestess)

W.I.T.C.H by Devon Cole

I was gonna go with Dragula by Rob Zombie but that felt too aggressive for Fiona.

Tracy Reznik (Mechanic)

Puppet Boy by Devo

It has the cheerful sound to it like Tracy does but I chose this song because I love her mechanical dolls (they underrated).

Vera Nair (Perfumer)

Francis Forever by Mitski

I feel like this song sums up how Vera felt after murdering her sister.

Kevin Ayuso (Cowboy)

Country Girl by Luke Bryan

I gave him the most southern song I could physically think of.

Margaretha Zelle (Female Dancer)

Liquid Smooth by Mitski

I think this song shows how Margaretha felt and how she saw herself just before coming to the manor.

Sergei (Weeping Clown or Joker)

Cigarette duet by Princess Chelsea

This song is pretty much a nutshell of when Sergei was having problems with Margaretha and was trying to convince her to stay with him.

Aesop Carl (Embalmer)

Coraline Opening Song

If you paid attention to when the other mother is making the doll then you can see when she lays the great aunts doll on what looks like a kit of some kind then you can see that it's an embalming kit. (My favorite movie song for my main)

Norton Campbell

Wolf in Sheep's Clothing by Set It Off

I saw somebody use it in an edit when he attacked Orpheus and Melly so I think this song fits.

Patricia Dorval (Enchantress)

Come Little Children from the Hocus Pocus 1993 film

I always got the vibe that Patricia is very family oriented and tries to avoid social conflict when she can so a peaceful song like this literally being sung by a witch is something Patricia would enjoy. (I love this woman so much)

Mike Morton

Freak by Sub Urban

I couldn't really think of one without repeating so I decided on this one.

Demi Bourbon

Alcoholic Friends by Dresden Dolls

I think this was how she felt after her brother got the invitation to the manor.

Victor Grantz

Message man by Twenty One Pilots

I think this song fits him because I'd imagine he's very observant since he's so quiet so not a lot of people know much about him but he knows a lot about others.

Andrew Kreiss

Tears to Shed from the Corpse Bride film

The movie is about death and the song is about comparing yourself to others. Nothing else fits quite like this one does. (I can't describe how much I adore Andrew)

Luca Balsa ("Prisoner)

Welcome to the Internet- Bo Burnham

I feel like Luca matches the overall chaotic vibes this song has and he would probably explain the internet just like Burnham did (very quickly and kinda passive aggressively)

Melly Plinus (Entomologist)

Entomologist by GHOST

Need I say more

Edgar Valden (Painter)

My Ordinary Life by The Living Tombstones

This song sounds happy like Edgar

Ganji Gupta (Batter)

The Sports Wii theme song

This is what he gets for beating up my poor Geisha during rank

Anne Lester (Toy Merchant)

Pogo- Living Island

A cheerful song because she deserves it (I have a soft spot for Anne mains)

Ada and Emil (Phycologist and the Patient)

Dark Red by Steve Lacy

I love their relationship so much

Orpheus (Novelist)

Satisfied by Marina and The Diamonds.

I don't know, just seems fitting.

Alice Deross (Journalist)

Ramalama (bang, bang) by Róisín Murphy

If you've ever heard this song, you know exactly why I chose this song.

Hunters

Leo Beck ( Hell Ember)

We'll meet again- Vera Lynn

This song is probably something he would listen to on repeat to hope that it will help him reunite with Emma. (I'm gonna cry)

Jack (The Ripper)

Run Rabbit Run by Flanagan and Allen

I have a feeling that he's one of those killers that taunts his victims so this song fits.

Violetta (Soul Weaver)

Spider's Web by Melanie Martinez (my favorite portals song)

She's literally a giant spider. (And I love her for that)

Michiko (Geisha)

Washing Machine Heart by Mitski

Michiko just wanted to marry the man the man she loved but it was ripped away by her lovers father. (I wanna give my main a hug so bad)

Joseph Desaulniers (Photographer)

Paparazzi by Lady Gaga

You saw this coming, don't lie to me

Burke Lapadura (Mad Eyes)

Rainbow Factory by Glaze

He works on machines and stuff. I don't know, I'm running out of ideas.

Yidhra (Dream Witch)

Puppet Boy by Devo

This is the only song I'm repeating because it fits so well.

Robbie (The Axe Boy)

Teenage Dirt Bag by Wheatus

I feel like it matches his energy as a kid with way too much energy and mischief in his little body.

Mary (Bloody Queen)

Where's your Head at? by Basement Jaxx

You could say she lost her head....I'm done.

BonBon (Guard 26)

Blow! By Ke$ha

His ability is that he can make these explosive thingies when he chair someone.

Ann ("Disciple")

Brutus us by the Buttress

This song was the first thing that came to mind when I saw her, obviously.

Antonio Paganini (Violinist)

Sex with a Ghost by Teddy Hyde

I feel like the "woman in the mirror" could be replaced by the devil he made a deal with.

Galatea Claude (Sculptor)

Breezeblocks by Alt-J

This perfectly describes how I think Galatea felt when her statue was destroyed by her father.

Percy (Undead)

Zydrate Anatomy by Alexa PenaVega, Paris Hilton, and Terrance Zdunich

Another song I can't really explain why but it feels right.

Grace (Naiad)

Siren by Kailee Morgue

Perfect for Naiad by the title alone.

Phillipe (Wax Artist)

Hidden in the Sand by Tally Hall

His backstory has always freaked me out a bit since he literally has a corpse covered in wax glued(?) to his shoulder.

Keigan Nicholas Keogh (Clerk)

The Principle by Melanie Martinez

I feel like Clerk would be the kind of person to subconsciously abuse her power like the principle does.

Alva Lorenz (Hermit)

Rat by Penelope Scott

Alva says he will never know the true answers to humanity so I feel like this song fits into that phrase.

Ithaqua (Night Watch)

Below the Surface by Griffinilla

This song was the first thing to come to mind for him so I'm gonna keep it.

Sangria (Opera Singer)

Ballad of Jane Doe from the Ride the Cyclone musical

Jane doe hits some of the highest notes in this song I've ever seen in a musical and I just feel like Sangria would really like this song.

#IDV #Identity V #identity 5

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bite-the-bloody-hand · 3 months ago

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6 SONG SOUNDTRACK (Part 1 - DISCO FUNK)

@chaosteddybear tagged me in the following game and the autism won. I decided to make an extra challenge for myself: a themed playlist with 1 'outsider' or anachronistic track that still fits the overall vibe. We begin... with Disco Funk.

PREPARE YOUR BUTTS

Rules: If you're tagged, make a new post with links to music and/or lyrics describing the following: 1. An event that defines your character's past 2. How your character sees themselves 3. How others view them 4. Their closest relationship (platonic or romantic) 5. A major fight scene 6. End Credits song

Spotify Youtube Music

1. AFRO CUBAN BAND* - Something's Gotta Give -

Dreams have done their share of dying love cries out but no one hears - oh, Something Something's got to give We can't, We can't go on like this

Is it a little on the nose? Sure. But a midnight revelation that he simply couldn't continue his life as it was going put Zell on the road to discovering his own path. He aches for the hurting, broken world he was brought into; he may not have the answer for fixing things, but he has to try something. Even if he's unsure of himself, even if he's convinced of his own fragility, he can fake strength if he can get out. He can't do anything while locked away in a Hellknight compound in Lepistadt, so he goes. And so it goes...

2. ARTIE SHAW - Nightmare - (Instrumental)

The problem with having an unclear sense of purpose and underdeveloped, poor self-esteem is that it can lead one down a path of introspection that keeps one in a spiral. Zell is an outsider when he isn't a rebel, never fitting with any authority and rarely synchronizing with any group; uncomfortable in his own body even when he's done everything he can to feel like himself. He desperately wants to solve the conundrum of connection - even when he's successful he has doubts that haunt him, especially in the lonely hours in the night.

(It's called Depression but they haven't invented therapy in Golarion yet)

Why this is the Anachronistic Outsider - Zell himself is a man out of time... even he doesn't know how old he is or how long he spent in Areelu Vorlesh's "care."

3. DEODATO - Also Sprach Zarathustra (instrumental)

I'm being a little bit of a shit with this; historically the misinterpretation of Nietzsche's Zarathustra have been that the title character is a teacher of doctrine/great leader/himself the 'Übermensch' he urges humanity to become. The actions of someone who wishes not to speak to the masses but instead live his own life of contemplation - and if he ever leads, to do it by example - often get twisted into fanatic parasocialization... if that isn't the life of the Knight Commander I don't know what is. Plus, this is just a bop.

4. EVELYN "CHAMPAGNE" KING - Shame

Ooh-ooh, it's a, oh-oh, it's a shame (Shame) oh-oh, it's a (Shame) mama** just don't understand Oh, how I love my man (shame) It's a, oh, it's a (shame)

Falling for someone when you already don't like yourself a whole lot can be hard, but it's much harder when nobody else likes the someone you love. Sometimes you just have to whip around and be assertive: the real shame would be abandoning what you have. Especially when it's this good.

5. C.J. & CO - Devil's Gun***

Get a new direction Well, well, well another resurrection Well now don't wait hesitate Or it's gonna be too late Flames are getting higher Got to jump out of the fire

I felt this fit as a big combat piece for Azata path especially; deeply anti-authoritarian theme about bringing together the community and avoiding the Devil (literal, figurative, and so on) and rebuilding? Yes please.

6. FRANCO MICALIZZI - Stridulum Theme (Instrumental)****

I wanted to close us out with something that felt a little magical and strange; this is a longtime favorite that really fit the bill.

TAGGING~ @Rlainarin @thedosianexplorer @arendaes I'm pretty sure two of you have already been tagged so feel no obligation, naturally.

*Had to transcribe the lyrics here myself so I'm not 100% sure I got them on the mark. Frustratingly I think this group only did one other track, which was the b-side for Something's Gotta Give. Real bummer, I love what I've found.

**Mama in this context is 100% Irabeth. She does NOT approve of this obviously farcical union. She's watching Arendae like a HAWK .

***YES, OF COURSE I played this during the Mephistopheles fight, who do you think I am?! TBH it was a real close call between this and Stayin' Alive but Devil's Gun won out for thematic reasons.

****I've had this track on Zell's playlist for a long time simply because I love the sound. It's the theme to a truly bizarre 70s Italian horror flick called The Visitor / Stridulum that's worth catching if you're curious. Free on youtube via the link.

#navel gazing #knight comander hellsing #the autism won #soundtrack ask game #this has been SO much fun #you asked #dj hellsing

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asoulofatlantis · 10 months ago

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So guys I am back yet again, after almost 3 weeks of a Horror that still doesn't seem to end. First I had a mild stomach flue and since it was (relatively) mild, I decided to go to work, since... you know I work had for the money. After taking multiple warning that I should not take the symptoms so lightly, I felt like I've finally recovered but for some reason I was still feeling weak. Just a few days after seemingly recovering from the stomach-flue, my immune system decided to kick me for what I did and for the first time in many, many years (this was a normal ocurrecence back when I was a sickly child tho) I had the flu. Like the actual 6 days of dangerously high fever - kind of flue. It took an unhealthy cocktail of pain medicine to even get the fever down a bit. On day 7 the fever was FINALLY gone and I though my body would gain back strength and the ability to eat. (I was not having hunger nor did anything taste good, so whatever I had been eating was me trying to force some energy source into my immensly weakened body) BUT I did not. I was feelings worse, even with the fever gone. So the doctor found out that the flu had weakened my immune system even further, so on top off still recovering from the flue I had bronchitis and Sinusitis. Giving him no choice but to pump a bunch a medicine inside me, including some antibiotics. And after 3 days of Antibiotics I am still not feeling very well. I still have to take painkiller against the Sinusitis, while my stomach start to revolt against all the medicine, by making me feel nauseous (AGAIN) and I am also still couching slime. So... not sure how long it takes for the Antibiotiks to kick in, but I feel like if they don't, the doctor will see me yet again on Friday, while my work place won't see me again next week - which isn't such a bad thing, since I found out just the day when I broke down with the fever, that my colleagues told my boss I am a lazy bitch who never ever does anything anyway. So.... no one is gonna miss me around there anyway.

All that aside... I had a lot of brain fog fopr the past weeks but I think I am not capable of FINALLY going back to Squall and FF8, so that I can rush to finish this game soon. So... lets go!

Can someone please tell me why I was so stupid to think it was a good idea to stop playing right at the beginning of the Galbadia-Garden-Attack? I have no idea were to go XD

I know this was basically the last chance for the Ring exchange, but neither of them know that. So... the timing is really weird. Especially since, Zell was supposed to be tired because he worked on remaking that ring for Rinoa, but what did he do all night, if he didn't even have the original ring as a reference? Its all a bit weird, if you ask me, even if I get that it was supposed to be a secret from Squall.

THIS GIRL IS GOING ON MY NERVES! She constantly gets herself in trouble and for some reason, only Squall can save her, as if he has nothing better to do as the leader of the garden then to babysit that spoiled so called princess. ARG!

Personal preferences aside... I think it speaks for Squall that he didn't let anyone else die, just because "his" Rinoa was in danger. He IS the Leader. He can not afford to play favorites in a situation like this.

This is so unreasonable, its making me angry. "Hey Squall, we might be going to die soon under your leadership, but your biggest priority should be saving Rinoa right now, because this is a lovestory!" is basically what they are saying and I can not even put into words how stupid that is!

This minigame is so freaking stupid!

XD I mean, its nice that she managed to hold on for so long because she wanted to gave him back the ring an all... but it was not nice of Zell to just give the ring to her without Squalls permission, especially after promising to not lose it or anything like this.

They are his best and only friends and sometimes as a friend, you have to do what's best for them, even if they do not agree with you. And I think it is good that Raijin and Fujin understand that. They could have just followed Seifer blindly like they did so far, but they do understand that that is not the way to save him.

For some reason my mods don't work anymore. That is really bad timing...

I did not take Rinoa with me and it makes no sense at all that the other would let her come running alone when they don't know if we might be in the middle of the fight with Edea. And I mean, we already confirmed multiple times that Rino is stupid enough to try come running to Squalls side for no apparent reason but shippiness, but the other are not stupid enough to let her.

The problem here is that the game had to handle the situation in case you do not bring her along and they couldn't come up with anything better than her just randomly finding us in this room before the fight with Edea.

I can kind of understand him. He just couldn't fight his own wife. But he still should have done this whole thing a bit differently.

In the fight against the Galbadia Garden, when Squall thought Rinoa was lost, he was merely thinking a sad "Rinoa..." and now all of a sudden she is all he can think about, even tho when he previously mentioned everyone trying to get them together he did not sound that enthusiastic or interested at all. And I do get that some people only know what they had or could have had after they lost it and Squall certainly is the type for it. But the whole buildup for this ship until now was really, really bad to begin with.

They did? When? Just a short while ago in Fishermans Horizont you just had another argument.

I forgot that I still have to deal with Lagunas part of the story...

This scene is only in here to see Laguna with a Gunblade because apparently its important to see Laguna using the same weapon his son does ^^'

It is a bit more complicated than that. But I understand why Ellone feels like its her fault.

We are traveling into the unknown with a comatose friend and a witch that could be controlled by some evil being at any given time... what exactly makes you feel like this is a picnic?

#ff8 mona version

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aberooski · 2 years ago

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Because I think about this far too much:

Yu-Gi-Oh GX characters as Final Fantasy classes in the context of my fic Sons of The Stars.

With explanations that might only actually make sense to me unless you've read the fic and played the FF games akaksk

Jaden - Thief

Fights with daggers/other short swords ninja sword if ur playing FFXII 👀 he doesn't ever actually steal anything except Jesse's heart 😏 but otherwise aligns well with the class imo. He's got the energy yet seriousness a lot of Thief characters in FF have Locke, Yuffie, Rikku, Zidane, etc, he's clever and agile, and he fights mainly for self defense and only if he has to. He tends to try a lot of stealth to get out of having to fight. Sneaky little man.

Alexis - Knight

Standard sword class, similar to Warrior. Fights with a two handed greatsword, and she chose to train herself to fight so that she could defend. That way she would be able to protect Atticus even though she'd left her station as princess of their dimension and was living in hiding on her own. She still cared about her people and wanted her brother to be safe, knowing there were people who wanted the royal family dead and gone. She'd rather protect the crown than be the crown in that sense.

Chazz - Warrior

Standard sword class similar to Knight. Fights with a one handed sword, but he didn't choose. He's been trained to fight to be a soldier for many years because of his family, and is being trained to fight to fight. Unlike Alexis, it was all about the glory for him because there was no other choice. He gained favor with Crowler, chancellor of their dimension, being so young and yet so highly skilled, which only ultimately put more pressure on him by his family to be the greatest warrior in their entire dimension. A feat which he attained by the time of the fic, when the J-Squad was only 17 years old.

Bastion - Black Mage

Not a dedicated Black Mage since he uses spells like Protect and Shell during the fic and even a standard Cure spell, but his main source of defense is his magic. His main elemental type would be water cuz water dragon ofc but he's only seen casting Thundara, Blizzara, and Thundaga during the events of the fic. And obviously as a Black Mage, he carries around a cool wizard staff 😌

Jesse - Summoner

Fairly straightforward, his main source of combat is summoning his Crystal Beasts and providing support to the others on the field.

Hassleberry - Berserker

Again. It's Hassleberry so pretty straightforward. He manages to never lose control in SoTS he loses it in OUAD though but very much has the capacity to. Having suffered for 2 years pre-fic as a military experiment in his and Jim's dimension after the accident with his leg left him with his animalistic side due to the dinosaur bone in his leg, and their scientists attempting to strip him of his humanity in order to weaponize him because they're fucking terrible people. Thx for breaking him outta there Jim 😭 Though he also aligns a little with the Monk class as well since like characters like Yang, Sabin, Tifa, Zell, and Snow, who in tradition FF job systems would fall under that class, his weapon is his fists 😌

Jim - Beastmaster

He'd also potentially fall under FFV's Chemist class since he's a scientist of sorts in the fic, or maybe even Geomancer dipping into his archeology and paleontology guy stuff. But factoring in Shirley, I'd sooner class him as a Beastmaster/Tamer.

Axel - Freelancer

Guy's a mercenary, he can do anything. If he had a weapons specialty, he'd be a Gunner/Machinist he literally gives Jim a gun before the final battle with Yubel, but he's a jack of all trades. He just kinda does whatever he feels like it or whatever is best to get the job done.

Bonus since he's extremely important to the fic but isn't actually a party member:

Syrus - White Mage

Sy actually was originally supposed to be an actual party member since he's my favorite character oh wow, I wonder why he's so important to the plot, like the fate of the entire universe hinges upon his safety 🤔 but it just didn't really end up happening, and considering his position in the fic it unfortunately makes sense to me that he isn't. But whether in the context of this fic or in canon, or literally any context, Sy is the team White Mage. Stereotypically a very weak and squishy, low defense/low attack class which I mean... yeah. But I've always thought he'd have a very strong magic stat which most White Mage's do Rosa, Porom, Aerith, Garnet, Eiko, Yuna (literally the strongest magic stat in FFX), Vanille and if he was able to be a party member he'd the team healer. Who can also tear holes in the space time continuum to open portals to travel through dimensions 😌

#I really do think about these things far too often #somebody stop me I can't keep getting away with bullshit like this #yugioh #yugioh gx #yugioh gx fanfiction #jaden yuki #alexis rhodes #chazz princeton #bastion misawa #jesse anderson #tyranno hassleberry #jim crocodile cook #axel brodie #syrus truesdale #final fantasy #abby's fanfic writer power hour #abby needs to be stopped

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foreverdreamsds · 6 months ago

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Our Mother's Day this year has been a tough one. Our beautiful, handsome and precious Aries had passed away in his sleep this morning. He was such a love of life and the light to our mornings. He was a big personality in the senior pups world. He was 16 yrs old and enjoyed being here with all his senior pup buddies.

He was a wonderful bossy little boy, who touched my heart and taught me lots of patience. He never showed any signs of struggling or pain, instead he laid on his favorite bed for his morning nap and restfully fell asleep forever. I miss him so much. He had been such a trooper and when Ebenezer was adopted Aries took over his spot of guarding the kitchen door while I was preparing their meals. There will be no tail wagging and hitting the kitchen door tonight. I will miss this sweet old man forever and ever. ❤️

Thank you everyone! Your support allows us to rescue seniors and special needs pups. To give them love and care for all their needs. We will be forever grateful!

If you would like to donate in his honor you can do so via Facebook, PayPal [email protected], Venmo @foreverdreamsds, Cashapp Sforeverdreamsds, Zelle: [email protected] our website https:/ www.

foreverdreamseniordogsanctuary.org or mail to

PO Box 521 Tryon NC 28782

Thank you❤️

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lovemesomesurveys · 1 year ago

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What was the last thing you spent more than $20 on? A bill. A bit more than $20. Sigh, adulting.

Give us a lyric from a song you’ve recently listend to: “He said Cashapp or Zelle, never mind scratch that I’m gonna send you a stack just cause you fine as hell. And I said, thank you, baby. Anything for my favorite lady.”

Do you wear actual designated ‘pajamas’ to bed? I am now; it’s a short gown. It’s blue and says, “Eat. Sleep. Coffee. Repeat.” Typically, I just wear t-shirt dresses or oversized tees to bed.

When was the last time you were tempted to do something you’d later regret? Hmm.

Have you ever had feelings for someone who was seeing someone else? Yes.

Have you ever had feelings for your best friend’s significant other? I’ve never been interested In a friend’s significant other.

What color is your hairbrush? It’s gray and green. I want a new brush. I really like the Wet Brushes.

How many times did you ride in a car today? I had my medical transport service pick me up with the gurney to take me to and from my doctor appointment this morning.

Who was the last non-relative to call you? Some spam call.

Are you comfortable in your own skin? No. I feel like I get so itchy sometimes and it’s an itch I can’t scratch and I just want to rip my skin off. Like sometimes whatever I’m wearing I can’t stand to have on my body cause it feels like it’s just rubbing against me and wrapping around my neck.

That probably sounds crazy.

What are your plans for tomorrow? I don’t have any plans outside of the normal stuff.

Are you in a good mood right now? I’m okay. I think after a few weeks I may have found the special gummies for me to help with my anxiety, pain, mood, and appetite. I have a few different ones; certain ones for certain things. I was trying to figure out what dosage was right for me and how each made me feel. I think I finally have found them. Game. Changer.

When was the last time you had an ice cream cone? Uhhh. I have no idea, honestly.

Did you eat breakfast this morning? Yep. I switched it up from my normal Cream of Wheat and had over-easy eggs, beans, cilantro and onions, guacamole, crema, and cotija cheese sprinkled all over. It was sooo good.

Have you ever been in a cemetery at midnight? No.

Do you live on your own? If not, who do you live with? No, I live with my parents, my brother, and our doggo.

How old are your siblings, if you have any? 23 and 39.

Can you tie a cherry stem in a knot with your tongue? No.

Have you ever used your cell phone as a lightsource in the dark? Yeah, many times.

Is your birthday in less than 6 months? Yep, my birthday is next month.

How old will you be in 3 years? I’ll be 36.

Do you remember who you were dating in August 2007? Yep, no one.

Why did you cry the last time you did? Mehhh, life.

Where are your parents right now? My dad is asleep and my mom is at the gym.

Would you rather be able to fly or breathe under water? Fly.

Have you ever had a crush on a sibling’s friend? No.

Do you know where your calcaneus bone is located? I don’t remember.

Have you donated blood in the last 2 years? I’ve never donated blood. I have severe anemia.

What was the last free t-shirt you received from? Uhhh. I have no idea.

Have you kissed your 10th contact in your phone? I’m not checking, but I can bet I haven’t.

When did you go to bed last night? I think it was a little after 11PM.

Is there anything you are looking forward to at the moment? No.

Who was the last person to piss you off? Blehh.

Are you a Scorpio? Nope. Are you an Atheist? I am not.

Are you Asian? I have some Filipino.

Are you blonde? No.

Are you taller than 6'0"? Haaaa, no. I’m like 5′3.

Are you fluent in another language? No, I wish I were fluent in Spanish.

Are you in the military? No.

Are you female? I am.

Are you single? Very much so.

Are you a parent? No.

Are you an artist? No, I wish.

Are you a musician? No. I sadly have zero talent.

Are you an athlete? Nope, another field I suck at. I’m not athletic at all.

Do you like winter? I love winter. The holidays, the weather, the scents, the colors, the decor, the coziness, the treats.... I love it all.

Who did you spend last New Year’s with? My mom and my aunt.

Did you do anything special for St.Patrick’s Day? No. I got into the whole ‘wear green’ thing as a kid growing up. I’ve had a few green beers. And my mom has made corned beef and cabbage every year for my dad cause he loves it. I personally don’t care for it.

Did you have a Valentine last time Valentine’s Day came around? No. I’ve never had one.

What is your relationship with the last person to comment you? Comment me where?

Who was the last person to sit on your bed? My mom.

Do you have a favorite flower? Not really. They’re all beautiful.

What is the best gift someone can give you? What I really want isn’t something that can be bought or is even tangible.

Was your last kiss a mistake? No.

Would you rather be stuck on a desert island with your ex or a python? Oh hell nah, I’ll take the python! lol kiddinggg, I’d take the ex. There’s really no hard feelings there, it’d just be awkward as fuck. I’m terrified of pythons, so that’s a definite N-O.

Do you kiss on the first date? If it feels right.

Would you rather visit Norway or BrazilI? I’d love to visit both.

Name three objects within your reach? My Starbucks energy drink, my phone, and a notebook.

What jewelry are you wearing? I have a ring on.

Would you get a shamrock tattooed to your forehead for $5000? Uh, absolutely not.

What do you smell right now? The cream of wheat my mom is making me.

Are you very flexible? I’m not flexible at all.

Where was your display pic taken? It was taken when Alex was at the Met Gala this year.

Do you like Chinese food? Sure.

Where was the last place you went that was more than an hour away? Why were you going there? To the beach early last year for my dad’s birthday trip.

If your best friend asked you to marry them what would you say? I don’t have a best friend. Or friends.

Are you under the influence of anything at the moment? I’ve had an edible and a pain med.

Would you consider yourself open-minded? Yes.

Who was the last person to tell you you looked nice? I have no idea. I haven’t looked nice in a very long time.

Have you ever been to a nude beach? No, and I have no interest in going to one.

What time is it? 11:33AM.

What are you going to go do now? Watch some YouTube, eat breakfast, scroll through Tumblr. I may do another survey at some point.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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