#zee just starts saying things

[secretagentsloveblogs]

MINORS LOOK AWAY THIS IS NSFW LMFAO

submissive and breedable gavin awakened something in me. i need to peg him

[aashiqeddiediaz]

lowkey wanna drop this post about ibuprofen vs naproxen (im a med student and i have a masters degree in pharmacology so those are my credentials xD).

(cw pharm mumbo-jumbo) buck's allergic to naproxen, which is a non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drug (NSAID). Ibuprofen is also an NSAID. these both are different in their mechanism of action, because ibuprofen is non-selective in blocking COX-1 and COX-2, and naproxen is selective for COX-1 only. this leads to some overlap, but not a lot in terms of allergic reactions. (there's like. a helluva lot of biochem involved in this so im not gonna go into it but basically, they're not the same drug)

now, some people will have you avoid NSAIDs altogether if you're allergic to one, particularly if you have a super adverse reaction to one. so if buck were to have severe reactions to naproxen like anaphylaxis, he probably should not be having ibuprofen just for the risk of another adverse reactions (and get an epi-pen dude).

however, we don't know what his allergic reaction is. if he has a milder reaction, like...maybe hives, GI upset, or something, he still might be able to take ibuprofen with no problem at all. and honestly, if he has ibuprofen in his own apartment, he probably can take it with no problem xD so...im so sorry, but it's not quite the plot hole or catch-all that you might think it is xD

[sweetfushi]

HIS RED FLAGS

angst, hurt/comfort | rintaro suna, kotaro bokuto, satori tendo, kentaro kyotani x reader, difficulties with expressing oneself, difficulty taking criticism, harsh bluntness (unintentional), anger issues | word count. 0.4k ◦ notes. they're trying their best </3

RINTARO SUNA

Sometimes he finds it hard to express himself, not necessarily because he’s faced trauma or hardship, but because he’s never exactly had anyone open up to him. He appreciates that you’re so willing and confident in him to express your own emotions but he sort of just stares at you when you wait for him to do the same. Especially when you’re arguing, he’ll say most things with an unintentionally apathetic tone, despite the fact that he truly means well. You can’t always detect that though, thus resulting in you feeling severely neglected.

KOTARO BOKUTO

He finds it difficult to take criticism, even where it’s constructive. Even when you politely call him out on something, his mood and smile will drop instantly. He views criticism almost as a way of making fun of his capabilities to do things, even when people have the opposite intention. He’d listen when you try to reason with his sudden change in mood, telling him that what he views as hate is actually the product of love and how much people care for him. It would take him a few hours to snap out of his bad mood.

SATORI TENDO

Although he tries the best he can to do otherwise, Tendo speaks his mind. Initially, you viewed it as a green flag, grateful that he was honest with you. However, sometimes you needed sweet treatment in times of despair or pain, and he had trouble holding his tongue. His teasing tended to turn into blunt remarks that you had to glare at him for, which would quickly make him seal his lips after apologising promptly. Sometimes he catches himself before you do once he sees your expression start to anger, which would cause him to reword whatever spills from his mouth.

KENTARO KYOTANI

He gets mad quick. God knows he’s trying, especially for you, but his therapist had insisted that you must be patient with him for both your sakes. He’d get mad over the smallest things and stare at you incredulously when you do nothing but smile sheepishly at his outbursts. Yes, it satiates him slightly to see you so calm, but it also just causes him to walk away with a fire still heated in his chest. He always apologises though, you never have to prompt it out of him, he’d eventually approach you with his hands in his pockets and an apology spilling from his lips (following which you’d tackle him in a reassuring hug).

sweetfushi © do not modify, repost, translate, copy or use my post in any way. all that is included in this post, aside from the fictional characters and universes, belong to sweetfushi (zee).

[anasui-at-disneyland]

Chelsea Van Der Zee - Villain Re-Write

Chelsea is probably the one thing that makes me feel conflicted the most about this movie:

I love her chemistry with Ruby and the scenes where is just them hanging out is by far the most entertaining parts of the movie

I hate her as a villain because she´s on the level of "I´m evil because the plot needs a villain" (and her twist being Nerissa downright sucked).

With that in mind, this is a bit of my "re-write" of her as a villain to give her a bit more depth:

*Most of the events of the movie remains the same, just modifying the bits with Chelsea

Make her Nerissa´s actual daughter (because that twist was dumb, came out of nowhere and I´m dying on that hill).

2. After her mother´s death on her battle against Agatha, she´s raised by the Mermaid kingdom´s courtiers basically her entire childhood.

3. She´s indoctrinated into believing Krakens aren´t these so called protectors of the sea, but rather they heavily police the rest of the kingdoms so they can´t expand their reach and keep that territory all for themselves (That way, just like Ruby, she´s being told the other side is in the wrong).

4. Through her life she develops a passion for all kinds sea creatures, and isn´t to fond of the idea she was taugth about Krakens controlling how much other sea kingdoms can expand.

5. The courtiers tell her there´s a way to bring her mother back AND to lower Kraken´s power so the sea territories can be balanced, and it´s by spell/ritual that involves the trident and Kraken´s blood.

6. She meets Ruby, and upon realising she´s a Kraken, at first sticks with her to manipulate her so she can retrieve the trident and take her blood to bring back her mother.

7. Over time, she actually starts bonding with Ruby over their shared interest over sea creatures and get to know each other backgrounds, so propose to her to get the trident as a peace sign between both kingdoms to reach balance (By this point, it plays a lot like in the actual movie, only that Chelsea still omitts the Kraken´s blood part because she believes Ruby would not accept if she knew that detail).

8. Ruby brings back the trident, and when Chelsea is preparing the spell, she stabs Ruby´s arm-tentacle, a weakened Ruby is baffled by this and Chelsea tells her it was necessary for the plan and she has to understand.

9. The trident reacts to Kraken´s blood and manifests Nerissa´s soul, to which Chelsea greets her mother as is the first time she sees her since she was a child.

10. Chelsea explains she learnt eveything about her and the courtier´s plan to balance the sea territories, and she even convinced Ruby, the heir of the Kraken´s throne to the plan.

11. When Chelsea asks how the trident could do all of that, Nerissa says that the trident never was intended as a peace sign, but rather a weapon with enough power to kill a Kraken, and when the Krakens are gone, all sea creatures would unite and obey the Mermaid kingdom as the supreme sea kingdom, and the ones to no comply would run into the same fate as Krakens.

12. By this point both Ruby and Chelsea see both of them got played, Ruby by accepting to the spell and Chelsea by trusting the courtier´s plan, now not only Ruby´s family is at risk, but pretty much every other creature on the sea.

13. Chelsea tells Nerissa that the plan is complete madness, and as heir of the throne of her kingdom, she wouldn´t let it happen, to which Nerissa says that she no longer has a voice on it since she was back as queen, and the role she plays on her plan is being her avatar to wield the trident, and that for starters, she was going to get rid of Ruby.

14. Chelsea refuses, Nerissa tells her how dissappointed she is that her daughter is so weak, but she got a contingency plan for that, if Chelsea doesn´t do it herself, then she would.

15. Nerissa´s souls enters Chelsea´s body to control her, but while Chelsea still has some control she struggles against the possesion, tells Ruby to escape and pushes her to give her a headstart, letting Ruby to get into a sea current, pushing her away while she sees Chelsea falling to her mother´s control and starting to grow.

16. Ruby gets to the Kraken´s palace and tells her mom and grandma everything that happened (the big kaiju fight takes place as normal).

17. Once the trident is shattered, Nerissa´s soul vanishes and Chelsea shrinks back to her normal size several meters mid air, to which Ruby rushes to catch her, saving her from the fall.

18. Upon waking up and staring at Ruby´s giant eyes, Chelsea breaks down after realising how she almost doomed the entire sea AND hurting Ruby (This way we can see Chelsea on a phase we never saw her before, instead of being bossy and self-confident, she´s now doubtful of herself and the things she did).

19. Ruby´s grandma tell Ruby to bring Chelsea to her so she can fry her, to which Ruby refuses (Just like in the actual movie, despite everything that went down, Ruby still advocates for Chelsea´s life).

20. There´s a talk between the 3 royal Krakens (Grandmamah, Agatha and Ruby) about what they should do with the trident´s shards, since it´s too dangerous if it´s assembled back.

21. Ruby has an idea and says they could scatter all parts across the sea, so there´s no way someone could find all of them, to which Grandmamah and Agatha recognise it might be a good idea, with the issue that they being as big as they are, that would draw to much attention and would risk to spot the shards.

22. Chelsea still shocked by everything that just went down, overhears their talk and says that she could scatter all the shard, since being smaller she would pass on as a regular fish.

23. Grandmamah and Agatha immediatly turns down her initiative after all that happened and how she backstabed Ruby, to which, Ruby stands up for Chelsea and tells her mom and grandma that she would be dead and couldn´t be able to alert them about Nerissa´s return not being that Chelsea fought back against her mother.

24. After some time pondering about it, they accept the initiative, under 2 conditions, those being that Chelsea must hide the shard where they tell her too being escorted by a guard, even if that includes land as well, AND, once she´s done with it, she must stay at the palace, since they don´t want to risk another betrayal (by doing this, Chelsea is given the chance to redeem herself, without immediatly being forgiven so she can work on her character for a possible sequel).

25. Chelsea accepts her new duty, and after they give her the map and her designated guard to start her journey, she goes to Ruby to say her farewells, hoping that Ruby will forgive her, to which Ruby says it may take some time, but she is grateful that she once gave her the determination to embrace her Kraken self and becoming better, so she will be waiting for her to comeback.

I know that this re-write may come as a long, dramatic and a bit corny (because it´s all of that, I recognize that), but that´s because I wanted to write both Ruby and Chelsea as 2 sides of the same coin:

Both of them were taught about the dangers of another sea creatures.

Both of them had good intentions at heart wanting to make the sea a better place.

Both of them got their trust played with and in consecuence got hurt by it.

I just really like Chelsea´s character and design that much that I don´t want her to go to waste to not be seen again.

___

But sadly, things are set in stone now, and unless they decide to do some crazy retconing for a sequel/series, we will be stuck with Nerissa "NO Chelsea" Van Der Zee.

But hey, not everything is doomed, in the words of Luz Noceda:

...

Hey, if you´re still reading this actual wall of text, you deserve a pat on the back, I knew this was LOOOOONG.

[yumenoyousei]

I asked for a commission of my DC OC Shay from @jnephrite and look at my girl!! 😭 She so pretty I can't even😭😭😭 Always loved @jnephrite art so seeing Shay in hers is a blessing 🙏🏾

And since the fic is almost halfway through posting, I thought, might as well introduce Shay properly!

Full name: Shay Michelle Frank (♀) Occupation: Graphic Designer / YouTuber Height: 5'9"  Birthday: September 16th  ☀Virgo 🌙Aries ⬆Aquarius Proud African American/Haitian & Gothamite  Hobbies: Poetry, Arts, Rap/R&B music, help the Gotham North Community Center, Discover new artists (both musically and visual arts)

Shay was born and raised in Gotham, close to the infamous Crime Alley, by her maternal grandmother, Marie-Monique "Manmi Mo" Antoine, and with her 3 years older brother Zachary "Zee" Frank. Her mother died of childbirth (she had had complications with Zee which was why she was hospitalized when pregnant with Shay) so her whole family distrusted the American health system. This is why when her grandmother was diagnosed with cancer, they didn't go to the hospital and only went to the illegal clinic. (Also; money.) Her father is unknown. 

Ever since young, she went to the Gotham North Community Center, mostly run by the Black and Latinx communities of the Crime Alley neighbourhood. Her grandmother would teach the children about mostly Black literature but also all sorts of arts which is why Shay is such a creative person. That's also where she met Jason Todd for the first time when she was around 4-5.

Her brother very early on started to "run the streets" and started to hang out with bad crews, but always had his heart on his sleeves. He just couldn't find other ways to get money to make sure Shay had the right education/a chance away from crime.

Her grandma died when she was almost 17 and her brother died not even 4 weeks later (2 weeks after her 17th birthday) because of a dispute between gangs. (Allegedly) 

After her grandma and Zee died, she went to live in Metropolis with her second-degree cousin, Jennifer Antoine, until she graduated from university. Even when in Metropolis, she would go as much as she could back to Gotham to see her people/help the center.

She started a YouTube channel talking about Gotham's art and musical scene to change people's persepective of Gotham after too many people at Metropolis U "pitied" her for being a Gothamite. 

As soon as she was about to graduate, she applied to work at Wayne Entreprise back in Gotham. She got a job as a graphic designer and moved back to her city.

At the start of the fic, "Awakening in Gotham", she is 22 and has been working at WE for almost a year.

Read more about Shay (and her love story with Jason) on AO3! (Trying to update every week!)

Random notes about Shay:

As I wrote in the fic's notes, the first reason for creating Shay was: who the fuck would stay in Gotham that isn't a criminal and/or a vigilante??

So I created a black girl who loves her community and sees all it could be while being very conscious of what it is and its dangers. Then I went, hey! she'd be good with Jason while I was starting my Jason Todd Thirst so obv my fic turned into romance. lol

The name comes from Belgian rapper Shay, Montreal-based singer Shay Lia, and Haitian Montreal-based singer Shah Frank. As I was creating Shay I was obsessed with all three of them and the name Shay Frank wouldn't leave me.

Ngl, I gave a lot of me to Shay; like her Haitian roots and GAD but very quickly she went her own way and grew in this character I'm proud of. I'd like to say I also gave her my music taste but she is way more into hip-hop than me and she rejects most of my pop playlists (sadly).

Because Shay was based on me, all her entourage I created is based on people in my rl. lol

I also absolutely wanted her to be friends with Bernard because I absolutely love Bernard (and Bat SO who are civilians? Tim and Jason bonding over the fact their SO are the only civilians in the Batfam?! So many fun things to do!!)

Zee is also a character that I love, based on one of my favourite cousins, and I got lowkey mad at myself halfway through that he was dead. So I have an AU where he didn't die in my head lol 

I'd like to write a oneshot of it when I'm done with this fic.

Last fun fact about Shay that I wasn't able to put in fic yet: all the rogues annoy her (mostly because they cause mayhem that cancel events) but she madly respects Poison Ivy because of her convictions and: "is she wrong tho?" 

I have a lot of other small notes about Shay and the Shay-verse but I'll post the rest when the fic is completed!

EDIT 2024-10-04: I completely forgot to add the link to the post fic notes! So if you read Awaking in Gotham do check those other notes!

[hwajin]

— we don’t need to do fine dining, make love when the sunrise

⁺ 𓂋 𓈒 ✦ :: bang chan | 4k follower event

genre: smut, fluff

pairing: chan x fem!reader

req

send me a request!

Silken sheets beneath your bodies, Chan's on your own, hovering, caging, loving. Late noon and you were yet to get dressed, yet to brush teeth and eat breakfast, yet to get the day started; and yet you lay between the sheets, mattress worn, the shape of your bodies embedded in the cushion. Kissing as though it was the very thing you were made for, giggling and talking in silence as though reality was far gone, unreachable to either of you.

Chan's lips wandered, on silken skin, on shivering body. Caressing neck, tracing mounds and hills and dips, granting love to each inch, each part oh so small. Tracing his way down and further, tickling inner thighs with hot breath, elliciting whines utterly soft.

"You wanna do something tonight? Go out, grab dinner?"

Voice muffled against your plush, followed by kisses, by sweet licks and grazes of teeth, drawing bruises, drawing lovemarks. You arched into his touch, into his feeling, shook your head. You didn't need anything, didn't want no other thing if he was what you had. For yourself and forever.

"Mhh, just wanna stay here the whole day. Don't wanna go anywhere."

Words breathy, wrapped around his fingers, under his influence entirely. Sighing when his mouth inched closer to heat, to gushing wetness, when fingers moved along slit, when eyes met your own. Speaking a million words in silence, saying so much more voices could.

And you let him pleasure you, lay beneath his touch, beneath his gaze, bare to the bone, exposed to him, no shame lingering in between your figures; if he was what you had you wouldn't allow embarrassment to settle within you. Arching your back further when lips met yours, kitten licking and caressing all to your liking, the way he knew you loved most, the way he knew drove you to infinite content. Fingers prodding into you, curling to find sweetest spot and you gasped out, eyes shut, head lulled back.

And hours later, having passed sunset, having passed nightly sky, met with lavender sunrise instead you yet hadn't moved, yet lay in bed, limbs entangled, lips connected, tiredness striking bodies due hours of lovemaking, though you didn't mind. If he was what you had, if you were what he had, no tiredness would be enough to lull into sleep, no sunrise would call for love to come to an end.

@es-kay-zee @jeyelleohe @angelwonie @lix-ables @yvniek4ng @ppiri-bahng @bintificreads @svintsandghosts @llunapastell @sensitiveandhungry @minniesvenus @junebug032 @noellllslut @a-cute-french-fry @felixinameadowandthesuniswarm

[coffeeghoulie]

Ghostober Day 12: Bondage

Much thanks to @kroas-adtam for putting Ghostober together <3

Pairing: Zephyr/Ifrit

Zephyr wants to make their flame look pretty, and Ifrit is happy to oblige.

Mature, 1.1k. They/Them for Zephyr. Contains bondage (technically shibari but i have plans for that day re: the other prompt)

Divider by @wrathofrats <3

"Are you ready, my flame?"

Zephyr's voice cuts through the chatter already starting to cloud Ifrit's mind; he shakes his head to try and clear it. He straightens up, shifting a little on the cushioned stool Zephyr's directed him to sit on as they set their cool hands on his broad shoulders, the point of their chin resting between his spiral horns.

Ifrit takes a deep breath, relaxing some under the points of contact. "I, uh." Ifrit pauses. Clears his throat. Zephyr doesn't try to fill the silence. "Not sure if I'm going to be able to sit still for this, Zeph."

Zephyr hums, a warbling, soft note like a dove's call. Considering. "Would you like some help?"

The fire ghoul huffs a breath through his nose, charcoal lashes resting on his cheeks as he shuts his eyes. "Please help, Zee?"

The air ghoul's head moves to press a kiss just under the point of his ear, nose nudging the several gold earrings threaded through the lobe. "Of course I'll help. Hands?"

"Will they be in the way if they're behind my back?" Ifrit cranes his neck to glance at his mate over his shoulder.

"Not terribly, no," Zephyr hums, trailing kisses down random spots over Ifrit's shoulders, over freckles that look like little flakes of white ash. "I think I saw a modification to what I wanted to put you in that restrains the arms behind the back as well."

"You gonna share with the class, 'specially because you're putting me in it?" he asks lightheartedly, taking a deep breath of the sweet apple blossoms and mint of their scent, letting it settle any residual nerves. There is no one else Ifrit trusts as much as his air ghoul. Will put himself into their hands time and time again.

Zephyr hums again. Drags one of those hands down Ifrit's sternum, feeling the rabbit pulse of his heart. "Was thinking a chest harness. Frame your perfect tits. But," They trail off, pianist's fingers tracing a pattern of lines across his skin. "A nice pentagram across your chest."

Ifrit groans softly, letting his head roll back softly onto Zephyr's shoulder. "We making this a religious thing, Zee? Lust for our Lord and all that?"

Zephyr shrugs, raising an eyebrow. "If you'd like to see it like that. I imagine we don't need to dedicate it to Him for it to count."

"I mean, just wasn't expecting a ritual when you said you wanted to play, is all."

Zephyr smiles, gap between their front teeth. "No, flame, no ritual. Just wanted to make you look nice for me."

"I'll never say no to that," Ifrit says. "Just, might need some help sitting still. Don't want to mess up your work."

"That can be taken care of," Zephyr laughs, finally leaving Ifrit's side to grab the two hanks of rope set out on their nightstand. They're beautiful pieces, if they had to say, each length dyed an ombre of yellow to orange to red and back. Slowly, Zephyr makes their way back to their mate. "Grab your elbows."

Ifrit flashes them a grin before complying, wrapping thick fingers gently around his arms. Zephyr pulls up a matching stool to the one Ifrit's on, taking a seat and unwinding the shorter hank of rope.

Zephyr hums something soft and melodic as they begin to work, tying Ifrit's wrists together with a simple cuff. It's slow and precise, even with such a simple tie. Zephyr smiles as they watch Ifrit's shoulders relax as they check the tightness and tension. He's always so worried he'll move and mess up a tie, wants nothing more than to be good for them, and Zephyr's always happy to indulge him in stillness.

"Better?" they ask as they tie off the cuffs.

"Much," Ifrit nods, not a moment of hesitation.

Zephyr smiles, rubbing their cheek against his shoulder with a soft coo before unwinding the second hank of rope. They give him a moment to enjoy the nuzzling before straightening, adjusting his posture. "Alright, my flame. Nice and still so I can make you look pretty."

Ifrit's back straightens, his shoulders flexed as the rope holds his hands behind his back. Even the finest sculptors' works couldn't compare to their flame, but Zephyr shakes their head as they begin to work.

It's meditative, and Zephyr even dares to think they might enjoy this more than Ifrit does, even as they sense his breathing slow and ease. They don't need to be quintessence to know that all of the thoughts have quieted in his overactive brain as they work.

Zephyr weaves the rope carefully over and around Ifrit's shoulders, between his biceps and his body. Solid horizontal bands that sit above and below his pecs. Each tie is checked meticulously, two of Zephyr's fingers between the rope and Ifrit's skin, warm to the touch like they're holding their hand over a flickering candle. The rope gets undone if Zephyr's not satisfied, finds the slightest flaw in how the tie sits over Ifrit's body. Nothing but perfection for their fire ghoul.

If Ifrit ever gets impatient with Zephyr's meticulous fussing, he never shows it; when Zephyr stands in front of him to arrange the pentagram over his heart, his eyes are soft and unfocused.

Ifrit lifts his head slowly, meeting Zephyr's eyes, giving them a tiny, crooked smile. His dark hair falls out of its ponytail, loose waves brushing the tops of his shoulders. Zephyr returns his expression as they tie off the last knot, taking a step back to admire their work.

As always, Ifrit's a vision, and Zephyr lets their eyes rake hungrily over his chest, his dusky nipples peaked from exposure to the cool air around them. His tits are perfectly framed by rope, seemingly making them bulge even further. Zephyr, despite their grip on their composure, feels their mouth water at the sight.

"You did such a good job staying still for me, my flame," they coo. Something in Ifrit's eyes flash and spark at the praise, and a glance down to his lap finds his cock bulging at the front of his gym shorts as he starts to harden. "I suppose I should reward you for such good behavior."

"Yeah?" Ifrit asks, voice slow as Zephyr moves to stand behind him once again. Their hands come up to his chest, pianist's fingers dimpling the muscle and fat.

Zephyr nips at Ifrit's earlobe, at the gold ring threaded through it as they begin to whisper. "Anything for my good little flame."

Ifrit's responding groan is music to Zephyr's ears.

[deluxewhump]

Guilt Rituals II

Cam asks Zee about their history

CW: past abuse, discussion of past dubcon, cam/zee stuff. Zee is largely forgiving/sees it more like Cam does than Alex does if that squicks you!

I think I avoided this conversation in depth because I think Cam would definitely avoid it for a long time, but it would happen eventually. Alex’s house timeline

*

Cam let himself into Zee’s room one night after work, discarding his work shirt in the laundry hamper. It was wet with warm rain from the short walk from his car to the apartment. The summer storm continued to drive against the windows. He pulled one of Zee’s tee shirts out of a drawer and sat on his bed.

“Hey. Can I ask you something?”

Zee looked up, a flash of uncertainty in his eyes. “Sure.”

Cam told himself anyone who was asked a question like that felt slight discomfort. It wasn’t because it was coming from him. He pulled the clean shirt over his head.

“When did you start to like it?”

It was out of the blue, but it had to be. He didn’t know how else to bring it up. He dreaded the answer he might get, but it would feel better than the speculation he’d been suffering in lately.

“When did I start to like what?”

“You know what,” he said quietly. Seriously. “With me.”

“Oh.” Zee thought for a moment, looking back and forth between Cam’s eyes. There was a pit of unease in Cam’s stomach that gnawed all day and only grew stronger at night. He felt it now. It made his heart beat faster.

“When I knew what you were doing,” Zee answered.

“What do you mean?”

“Well at first…” he switched off his tablet and repositioned on his bed so he was facing Cam more directly, his legs crossed beneath him. “Look, I wasn’t opposed to it. I never was. I just didn’t know how far you’d take things. I didn’t know if you’d try to hurt me with it. Like, is this sex or is it going to turn into something else?”

Cam nodded. That was more than fair. He’d thought Zee might say it was all a part of the hurting. That it was just more violence in a different form. His own thoughts paced in circles telling himself it wasn’t, it was, it wasn’t.

“If you’d asked,” Zee added, “really asked, I would’ve said yes.”

I’m sorry was on Cam’s tongue, but it felt vile. He said nothing.

“And it wasn’t something else,” Zee said gently, trying to reassure him. Reassure him. It was absurd. “You never hurt me with that, Cam. It was fucked up. I see that. Back then I was… not myself, a lot of the time. What was I gonna do, turn you down? But I’m not mad at you. I was just a little afraid of you still.”

“I’m sorry.”

He could say it for that part, for some reason. He was sorry he ever made Zee afraid of him when they were alone. He still couldn’t say it for the other thing.

“I know,” said Zee. “I can’t tell you it’s okay, but… you and me are okay.”

“Yeah. Well, I’m glad about that.”

“Did Alex bring it up again or something?”

“No,” Cam answered, pressing his fingers over his eyes. He had barely seen Alex this last week. Their schedules were fairly different. Now even Zee was working, albeit from home. He kept saying it was nothing much, that it was just an hourly gig, but Cam overheard Alex telling him it wasn’t “nothing much,” it was a leaps-and-bounds accomplishment considering the damage they’d done to his reading, and how hard he’d worked to regain it. Most importantly, it gave Zee some money of his own that wasn’t a gift from a former keeper, and a daily sense of purpose.

“I’m just stuck in the past right now, I think,” said Cam, just to say something.

“You’ve kind of made a lot up to me, you know.”

He winced. “How can I ever really make it up to you, though? How can I make it up to myself?”

Make it up wasn’t even the right words. He wanted to pay for it. There was no way to pay for it.

“I’ve wondered that, too,” Zee told him. “I’ve done more than one stupid thing in my life that I’m reminded of every single day.”

“Stupid isn’t the same as mean.”

Zee stared at his dresser in the corner before deciding whether or not to ask him something. “Why were you so mean? I remember trying really hard to be whatever you asked me to be. I get why the other stuff happened between us. I really do. I was there. But I still don’t get that part.”

Cam shook his head. “I dunno. I resented you. Not for who you are, I didn’t know you yet. Just for… being. Once you got there I kind of couldn’t stand to look at you. I think because I knew it wasn’t right. The conditioned responses and stuff kind of freaked me out. And, I think I wanted you to myself, and in order to be okay with the arrangement, I went with the part of me that resented you.”

Zee was looking at him calmly, indulgently. “I guess. I do wish it could’ve been a little different. I had Alex and Dom. They kept a lot on the rails for me. Kept me from, I don’t know, totally despairing, I guess? You guys made a frat house feel like a prisoner of war camp sometimes. It would’ve been awesome to have you, too.”

The gnawing grew stronger, spread outward and felt like missing a step on the stairs and nearly falling. Gutted, was the word he was looking for.

“I wish I could go back,” he said. He was pretty sure he meant it. That if he could press a button and have to relive all the bad parts of that year and a half over again, he wouldn’t hesitate. “I’d do it differently. I mean, I wouldn’t buy a boxie in the first place…”

“Don’t say that,” Zee said, widening his eyes for effect. “You guys were still a better deal than I might’ve gotten a lot of other places.”

“Okay, well, day one then. I’d… do it different. But I can’t.”

“That’s what regret is. It means you would if you could. But you can’t.”

“And what do I do about that?” he asked flatly, to no one in particular.

“I don’t know.” Zee laid back against his pillows and put his legs across Cam’s lap. “But if you figure it out, let me know, would you?”

[sammy-deserves-better]

Hey people who definitely didn’t follow me for my AUs here’s another AU I thought up on the spot!!!

Fantasy/Royalty AU bam lets get into it

Julia and Bowie are the princess and prince of the kingdom, as you do, it’s gay and lesbian hostility in that castle every day

Axel, Wayne, Raj and Emma are knights with Axel being the head of the knights, Emma is also secretly a florist because why not

Priya is the head of the guards while Caleb is the personal guard/advisor to the king

Chase is a travelling bard who loves to talk about his ‘amazing’ adventures of ‘helping’ people

Nichelle is still a famous actress but instead of movies she’s like, famous from plays and all that jazz

Ripper’s a barbarian that’s pretty good at his job, unfortunately he is not taken very seriously

Millie is a famous writer but she’s so damn difficult to find at times and only a few people know where she actually lives

Damien is a wizard’s apprentice, he’s still learning but he’s got some real talent within him

Zee is the court jester, he didn’t even like try out for the role he just started talking one time and the king thought he was hilarious

Scary Girl is a famous necromancer because she is, funnily enough, scarily good at her job

And MK, silly ol’ MK, is a master thief who is wanted all over the world, but can never be located, always managing to escape at the last moment

Alright here’s some more details yippee

Raj and Bowie are like, in love, obviously, knight x prince romance! Forbidden love that isn’t really forbidden but like it’s super cute and Raj is so smitten and Bowie just loves this handsome knight that would do anything for him

Wayne and Emma are friends here because I also think they’re silly, Wayne’s the only one who knows Emma’s secret florist job because she trusts him enough and also he accidentally found out but it’s fine!! But he also nearly gives away Emma’s secret so many damn times because he’s just a little bit stupid

‘Man I wish I could get Bowie a nice bouquet…’

‘Oh well Emma is actually a fl-‘

And then Wayne gets elbowed so hard he can’t breath for 2 minutes

Emma also definitely has a thing for the cute court jester but she has no idea on how to actually approach Zee so she just sends him flowers anonymously and sighs while looking at him lovingly

Julia and MK meet because MK climbs up the damn castle walls at 2am and sneaks into Julia’s room just to rob her, gets absolutely slammed by the princess, wakes up and is tied to a damn chair with Julia right up in her face about to rip her to shreds and all MK can say is ‘you are REALLY attractive oh my gods’

This throws Julia off, they start talking, Julia realises that despite the fact she is holding one of the most wanted criminals hostage in her room, she wants to keep seeing MK because she’s entertaining and mean and just slightly pathetic, so she lets MK go on the promise that the thief will come back every night and so she does and yadda yadda lesbians toxic yuri wins

Millie’s stories actually come to life because shocker she’s actually a wizard in disguise and she needs to be really careful about what she writes so that’s why she hides herself away and is so hard to track down because if the wrong people knew about her magic capabilities oh no that’s a lot of blood and injury and angst and 10k words every chapter

Millie’s parents also had this ability to create anything from mere writing, they shared this ability with the kingdom, and so if an important figure asked them to say…make a protector of the kingdom, they would do so, and they did, and that’s where our villain/antagonist comes in but that’s a story for another day

The older gens are also involved in this one way or another as well, most are just backgrounders but some hold important to the story

Damien is the wizard apprentice to Leonard and Tammy, two great and powerful sages who spend their time helping the world

DJ is the one who taught Emma how to be a florist, he’s kind and understanding and always helps Emma choose the right flowers to give to Zee

Eva trains Ripper under her watchful eye, she’s proud of how far he’s come, but feels he can do just a bit more

Aleheather are the king and queen of the kingdom, Bowie and Julia are their adopted children

And that’s all I got for now uhhhh add whatever you want to this it’s just a silly time

[your-ne1ghbor]

Asha's Animal Side Kick

Now presenting...

the one...

the only...

BONSAI !!!!!!!!!

It was either between a possum, ferret, or a great eared nightjar/type of bird, but either way, I had to go with the possum.

I liked the light brown possum a lot personally since I thought it was really cute yk??

It was also based off of this possum:

OKOK, you may be wondering why I changed Valentino, or Bonsai into a possum.

There are 2 reasons:

Numero Uno:

VALENTINO IS FUCKING UGLY

I think my friend @sewerpalette said it best here:

Nothing can convince me otherwise. His design is just SO ugly to look at. It is not pleasing.

And it doesn't help that I wanna punch his stupid fucking face like it is so punch-able

OKAY SURE, the concept versions of Valentino is cute...but ever but I didn't like how I drew goats in my style. It could be just that I'm not good at drawing them, but I also didn't like my color pallet I did for him, which was a lot like what Bonsai has color pallet wise, and it fitted Bonsai more than Valentino.

Numero Dos:

ESMERALDA HAS A GOAT SIDE KICK.

OR BETTER YET, WE HAVE ALREADY SEEN IT.

It is basically a repeat of what we have already seen, which I didn't like.

Just because you aged down a goat does not make it ORIGINAL.

Its okay to have Asha have a pet goat in the other rewrites though I don't MIND AT ALL. ITS YOUR AU U DO WHAT EVER, IM JUST MAINLY TALKING ABOUT MY ICK WITH THE MAIN FILM. IT JUST REMINDS ME OF SOMETHING ELSE.

What I'm trying to say is that Valentino feels like a refrence to Huntch Back of Notre Dom, which this movie has a thing with adding stuck out refrences instead of making it subtle. I mean I know it was a 100 year aniversary, just make it more subtle though so people can rewatch it and find refrences they didn't notice first time watching.

Anyways....

Some fun Facts about Bonsai:

Bonsai is actually a little dwarf, and the runt of his family. Asha adopted him when she found out Amaya told Charo (Charo is a lynx btw) to get rid of them all since she thought they were rats (even though they are fucking HUGE) (PLUS IT IS TO EMPATHESE ON THE FACT THAT THEY ARE MISTAKEN FOR RODENTS WHEN THEY AREN'T, THEY ARE APART OF THE MARSUPIALS FAMILY AND THEY GET RID OF RODENTS/EAT THEM)😭

(I might actually make him slightly bigger than how I drew Bonsai, but who knows yk?)

So Asha took the responsibility of taking care of the little Possum, since she didn't want the possum to grow up alone, and so that she can have some company.

IT TOOK A LONG WHILE for Bonsai to warm up and trust Asha, but in the end, he saw her good nature and swore to protect Asha like how Asha protected him from getting eaten from Charo. Which is why he dislikes Star Boy A LOT (mainly because he doesn't trust how this creature can literally transform into anything and doesn't want him to end up being something like Charo 😭)

He is just a little guy that wants to make sure his friend doesn't get hurt by a celestial force.

This is basically how I imagine how they both would meet:

(Just wait till he finds out Asha likes him. He is going to be so judgemental)

To get this part out of the way, if I end up having Bonsai speak, it would sound like a child, since I DREADED when the goat started...TALKING LIKE A GROWN ASS MAN LIKE NO PLEASE NO. And it would be more adorable yk?? :3

Lastly, here is the first doodle I did of him.

(JUST IMAGINE HIM TALKING LIKE A CRAZY 7 YEAR OLD LIKE THAT WOULD BE SO FUNNY)

@oh-shtars @annymation @signed-sapphire @chillwildwave @spectator-zee @uva124 @rascalentertainments @tumblingdownthefoxden

I might also go with a different color pallet for Bonsai but idk yet

[another-lost-mc]

if Lucifer calls mc when things just starting to get spicier, will your ocs let them pick up the phone?

So, are we pretending that Lucifer’s ringtone starts blaring on MC’s D.D.D. when they and (OC of choice) are getting frisky?

OH BOY.

(It goes without saying that all the OCs will stop what they’re doing so MC can answer if needed, but their reactions to the interruption are a bit different.)

(NSFW / Suggestive below)

Azra: He’s so irritated that his first instinct is to keep going and fuck MC harder. Maybe if he weren’t as jealous as he is, he’d want MC to pick up so Lucifer can hear exactly what it was he interrupted and why whatever he wants can wait. It’s not a coincidence if Azra starts moaning louder than before to drown out the noise until it stops.

Zee: Snarls in frustration, lifts his head up from where it’s buried in the crook of MC’s neck (or between their thighs) and gauges their reaction. If MC asks him not to stop, he won’t (although he may be tempted to throw the stupid thing against the wall just to get it to stop making that awful racket). Like Azra, he tries distract MC from the noise - the growls and grunts and filth he mutters in their ear is more than enough to accomplish that.

Karasu: It startles him and he stops and pulls away instinctively (if you heard him whine or whimper a little, no you didn’t). He would hope only an emergency would prompt Lucifer to call MC during one of their evenings alone together at Karasu’s nest. He’ll need a few minutes after the distraction before he’s ready to resume things.

Tenebris: Oh, MC can answer the phone if they need to, he’ll smother his own disappointment for MC’s sake. Does he pull MC onto his lap so he can hold them (and nuzzle them and kiss them) the entire time? Yes, he does. Does he care if Lucifer hears? No, he doesn’t.

Meta: He startles easily and the sound he makes - somewhere between a yelp and a squeak - is less than dignified. He whines when MC slips out of bed to find their D.D.D. and he pouts until the conversation is done and he’s finally able to pull MC back into bed with him.

[xxhappy-chickenxx]

next prince reactions

cause omg do i have lots to say!!!

first things first, ZEE ON A HORSE!!!

next, this absolutely *gratuitous* titty shot

(director: we can close your robe- zee: absolutely not)

nunew being a brat as usual

ZEE FLICKING THAT SWITCHBLADE OPEN??? (i couldn't get a better screen grab T_T)

HERRRRRRR!!!!!!!

kinky sex in blouses!!!!

the sexual tension of THIS!!!!!!!!

you've heard of knife play, now get ready for: saber play!

nunew being THAT!! BITCH!!!

gifs of this incoming bc AHHHHHH

i'm not gonna put a screenshot of zee's happy trail askakfsl; but just know that it will be circulating in my brain for the next 7-10 business days

and finally... THE WINKKK!!!!

we also NEED to talk about the outfits bc this trailer alone has fed me for the next century but that'll be its own post

this looks SO promising, i remember watching the original trailer at work on my phone and SQUEALING so i am beyondddd excited for the show to start airing!!!!

[enteringdullsville]

‘24 was alright, but it’s definitely the Action to ‘23’s Island; stuck having to continue a tough act to follow.

I know I’m skipping Pahkitew Island (and to a lesser extent World Tour) to get to this, but I have a lot of ideas for what I want (but don’t at all expect) for a third season.

First the elephants in the room, the newbies. Assuming season three is full length, 18 contestants is seems like a good cast size. Nick, labeled “The Know-It-All”, is like an unholy cross between Sierra and Dave: He’s seen every episode of this show fifteen times…and he’s already regretting attending. He’s actually an online critic who made the vital mistake of pissing off Chris in front of millions of his (Nick’s) viewers, prompting Chris to personally reach out to invite him onto the show. The fact Nick’s an in-universe character means he’s a lot more fair to the contestants than most fans and critics would be, but he’s still incredibly caustic to everyone with a pulse (and also Scary Girl). Felicity, labeled “The Gamer Junky” combines Sam’s interests and Lindsay’s demeanor…which I guess is just Kitty. More or less the pain magnet for the first half of the season (Damien takes over partway through), Felicity’s a moderately famous streamer with a rapier wit and is almost as athletic and coordinated as Tyler. She’s more straightforwardly a fan of the show, that’s why Chris picked her, but given that her team is a ticking time bomb, she’s gonna hafta work fast.

The teams consist of the Hiding Snakes (Nick, Damien, Julia, MK, Wayne, Raj, Priya, Millie, and Caleb) and the Feral Kittens (Felicity, Nichelle, Bowie, Emma, Zee, Chase, Ripper, Axel, and Lauren).

Episode 1. The cast is dragged kicking and screaming back to wherever the season takes place. Wawanakwa again? The abandoned movie lot? Boney Island? Who knows, but they don’t have to worry about it, since the challenge is solely for the new duo to pick their teams by collecting golden statuettes of the cast. Maybe it is an Action Sequel.

Episode 2. Nick and Felicity both have their work cut out for them. In one corner is Nick, who has to put up with Julia/MK vs Priya and also everyone on his team not named Wayne. On the other corner is Felicity, who has the misfortune of being caught up in a popularity contest: now that Ripper and Axel are dating, Chase feels he and Zee have been left in the dust (Zee has no clue what’s happening), leaving Chase and Axel to bicker endlessly throughout the challenge. Meanwhile, Emma’s finally taking her opportunity to patch things up with Bowie, who himself is more preoccupied with Scary Girl, who’s taking her loss last season about as well as Courtney did in Island. The absurdity of Ripper being forced to play the voice of reason is not lost on him, but it doesn’t save him from elimination by Felicity, Nichelle, Emma, and Bowie to make the arguing stop. I didn’t want to eliminate him so soon, but he made it halfway through two seasons, so it had to be done.

Episode 3. So it turns out sending the one guy keeping Axel in check and Chase from accidentally killing everything packing was not Felicity’s best idea. Feli and Niche bond over poor game decisions (and the fact the latter’s career is starting to pick back up helps too), while Emma and Bowie are now on speaking terms again. Speaking of which, Emma tries to sic Lauren on Chase (he’s voted her off twice now), giving a recap of all the reckless and insane stuff he’s done. Gotta get rid of your distractions while you can. Unfortunately for Ms. People Person, Lauren was nicknamed “Reckless and Insane Girl” before signing up and the two surprisingly hit it off. MEANWHILE BACK AT THE LAB Nick picks up where Bowie left off and commandeers Julia and MK’s cheating skills for the team, much to Priya’s chagrin. Caleb grows worried about Priya’s mental state, but Millie, determined not to screw herself over again, goes with everything she says without question. In the end, Zee goes home, still hopelessly confused about why everyone’s fighting, but at least avoiding any major social gaffes. It’s a good thing he and Ripper merged twice, otherwise I’d really feel like scum.

Episode 4. This one’s a breather, but we don’t have to tell them that. Nick for the first time is divided over his role as a contestant and as a critic. As a contestant, he knows it’s best to keep Julia, Priya, Wayne, and Caleb as close to him as possible (and pats himself on the back for acing the team picking challenge), but as a critic he doesn’t particularly want to keep them around, especially Julia and Priya who pulled a Gweathuncanoey and have stuck around for two seasons in their entirety. He also kinda wants MK and Julia to become an item. On the flip side, since Emma introduced Chase to his demented new bestie, he’s gotten even more crazy himself and spends the entire challenge locked in a dare contest with Nichelle. Emma and Bowie watch on in amusement to take the latter’s mind off of being separated from Raj, while Axel reminisces about simpler times when she was an early boot. Caleb and Millie continue their power quartet with Damien (who has taken it upon himself to start lugging a first aid kit every he goes) and Priya, whose fuse grows shorter than Eva’s.

Episode 5. Caleb should probably know better than to make deals behind Priya’s back by this point, but it’s her own fault for sharing the Bow’s taste in men. Since the final four of the previous season (and also Damien) are all on the same team, Lauren makes her first strategistical move now that she knows the group’s biggest fears. MK proves to be a tougher nut to crack, however, building on the two’s interactions in the 24 finale. Axel and Chase have entered “Cold War” territory and are both trying to gather allies. Emma and Bowie are a given (although the latter can’t promise anything), and Chase has Scary, but Felicity and Nichelle are anyone’s game. Not that it really matters though, since that deal I mentioned was for The Boys (TM) to vote Caleb out, since he doesn’t want to hold Priya back anymore. Priya is crushed, Julia is laughing hysterically, and Damien’s salty that nobody voted him off when he was literally asking for it. I didn’t want to give him the Gwen/Ezekiel treatment where he’s the lowest member of two teams, especially since it means he’s 16th again, but here we are. Curse my impartiality!

Episode 6. Knowing Priya’s going to stick around as long as she has allies, Julia and MK start gunning for Millie, hoping she slips up eventually. Nick, however, secretly chooses to plot against the duo, even though MK is his favorite character from this season, because honestly, who would you pick as an ally? Meanwhile, the Kitty Kold War’s come to a boiling point with Nichelle and Felicity’s votes up for grabs. Bowie’s been on Team Axel, but after suffering a migraine all day decides to join the two wildcards. In the end however, Wayne genuinely asks Axel and Chase why they’re even arguing to begin with. Realizing that Ripper’s already gone by this point, they decide to cooperate this one time…a decision that sends poor Wayne right to the losers’ circle. I wanted to see how long I could keep the Hockey Bros around before I had to eliminate the one who lasted longer last season. At least he still has his sick awesome two buses.

Episode 7. Did somebody say “reward challenge”? With the teams even for the first time since the second episode, the two have to wrangle up old contestants scattered across the lot (I decided this will be the Action reboot), and appropriately it’s the three most frustrating contestants to track down: Shawn for the Kittens (much to zombie slayer Axel’s delight), Dawn for the Snakes (much to tiny Tsundere MK’s horror), and for a bonus, Ezekiel (who Chris has “procrastinated a bit” on retrieving). This one’s more or less an excuse for character growth, so that’s why I’m describing the challenge in a little more detail. Anywho, Dawn, Shawn, and the one whose name doesn’t rhyme are all caught, the Kittens winning. And MK’s secrets are totally safe and not revealed to the public at all. In other news, Dawn and Shawn both want off the lot immediately after finding out Scary Girl’s still on it.

Episode 8. (Sotto Voce) I’m gonna have to eliminate a girl sooner or later. Anywho, the Cold War arc has finally cooled down since even Axel can’t stay mad forever and Chase is too narcissistic to hold a grudge. With the merge coming up, Felicity requests Nichelle train her since her leadership skills can only get her so far at this point. Priya and Millie are taking the opportunity to relax since Julia and MK are still awkward about the secret crush I totally lied about earlier. Maybe they’ll get together, maybe they won’t…but Nick ensures they totally do, if only because he refuses to let his OTP sink…at least not before he takes the opportunity to eliminate MK, who’s both a bigger social threat and less of a physical aid at the moment. I think she’s made it far enough for me not to have to explain her elimination in detail.

Episode 9. With Julia out of allies, she’s gotta either guarantee her team wins, bribe Chris into throwing in another immunity idol, or make one of her teammates look less desirable than her. In unrelated news, Raj is still missing Wayne after I cruelly tore the two apart. Axel’s now in on Nichelle and Felicity’s alliance, meaning Emma and Bowie have to get in their good books before Scary Girl (she’s still plenty mad at him) does what Fang does best. Try as the noble Priyanka and Millicent may, Julia manages to play up Raj’s misery to get Nick and Damien (in a moment of weakness) to vote him off. For whom Raj himself voted, I didn’t think too hard about, but the Snakes are sucking for a team with four different finalists on it. Oh, and Bowie is pissed. TOTAL DRAMA BOMB!

Episode 10. In the final pre merge episode, not much occurs. That dang moon from All-Stars is making Lauren act strange, even by her own standards, and not in a productive way. Bowie throws caution into the wind and goes all out in trying to make sure Julia goes home (don’t have to tell them twice), making Emma realize how tiring it is to have to play damage control to someone else’s revenge schemes. Nichelle takes charge, refusing to get eliminated before the merge again, while Chase gets everything on film. By this point, Millie’s competent enough to single-handedly win this for her team, and also by this point, Scary’s freaked enough people to get voted out. Of course, this isn’t the last we’ll see of her…because she ran off before Chef could apprehend her.

We now interrupt this program to bring you this picture of Team Victory I drew for a follow up to my iconic TDWT/Jellystone animatic. I wasn’t feeling like making a whole video, but I kept the boarded first shot anyway.

Episode 11. Chris has dissolved the teams for one purpose: catch Scary Girl before she tries to reenact the events of Scarlett Fever. To make a long freaking story short, they apprehend her…and Chris decides to go the Dakota route and give her a promotion…to tertiary third host…meaning she has the means to cause even more mayhem. And no, Chase, that doesn’t mean you get to submit challenge ideas.

Episode 12. It’s Scary’s first day on the new job, but Chris insists she “sTaRt SmAlL”. The girls’ alliance approaches Nick, partially to build their numbers but also because Felicity feels it’s only fair she at least tries to build a friendship with the other rookie player. He agrees, but only if he can bring Damien (his best friend on the island and his second favorite character). Bowie and Emma take their chance to get rid of two birds with one stone, since Priya and Julia now have nothing stopping them from maiming each other. And maim, maim, maim they do, since (as you could probably guess by how I highlighted their names), they both get sent packing! Did I deliberately hold off on voting them out solely so they’d reach the merge a third time? Yes. Did I do this because having them be proper enemies instead of rivals like in 23 was entertaining? Yes. Did I also do this to piss off the people complaining they (read: mostly Priya) had too much screen time? YES! Do I love making this fan base cry? You tell me.

Episode 13. Against his alliance’s better judgment, Nick tries to edge Bowie back into active villainy, realizing too late he’s prioritized competent gameplay over plot by getting rid of the main conflict. Unbeknownst to him, Millie has her sights on him, correctly viewing his alleged alliance as suspicious, not to mention him turning against MK a few episodes back. Damien suffers from a terrible disease called “having Scary Girl in your general vicinity”, and to add figurative insult to literal injury has to deal with Chase trying to befriend him at her request. Luckily for everyone, it’s a reward challenge for the final eight.

Episode 14. Nick may have awakened a monster. Trying to stir up drama again, he decides it’s a great idea to set Lauren on Emma, claiming A: that it’s the best way to get his attention, and B: that only she gets to cause him harm. Feeling genuine emotions of protection for the first time in her life, she does all she can to make Emma suffer (even though the latter genuinely doesn’t care what Chase does at this point and is willing to be polite if he doesn’t pull anything). Millie and Bowie put aside their differences to stake out Nick, but of course Bowie has other plans. The girls’ alliance continues to serve and oh would you look at that, Emma’s gone because she’s canonically rich anyway and Scary’s not gonna let up while she’s still on the island. I could’ve made her elimination not Chase related. But I didn’t. Emma deserves better, but this is Total Drama, where we don’t even remotely give a crap.

Episode 15. Bowie’s out of allies and Scary’s still after him, so now he really needs to keep Millie close, and what better way is there than to break up an alliance? Nick’s more than a little suspicious about Millie’s sudden investment about everything he does, prompting Bowie to claim she’s in love with him and can’t communicate it. Nick is doubtful, but the idea behind planted in his mind causes him to catch feelings. Damien, being Nick’s confidant and feeling guilty about how he indirectly screwed Priya and Caleb (and also Zee) last season concerning their romance arc, tries to steer him away from her. Axel and Scary bond a little when they trick out the Sling of Shame, and by that I of course mean they accidentally break it in half. Chris already sold the Drone of Despair, so let’s call this one a draw.

Episode 16. Bowie, now fully back in the groove of things, tries to drive a wedge between Nick and the rest of his alliance, while Nick has some delicious angst over what he should do about his budding feelings, knowing full well that Bowie’s lying to him but failing to realize Millie wants him gone. Felicity pops up for the first time in a while, which in Island would mean she’s going home next (let’s imagine she won immunity last episode) but here means the girls’ alliance goes through its first rough patch when Axel, who’s long since taken over as leader, tests Felicity’s resolve. Unfortunately for Axel, Millie, Bowie, Damien, and Nick view her signature brand of tough love out of context and drop her like Ripper’s parents dropped him.

Episode 17. Ten episodes left and a lucky number seven contestants remain. Chris tells the kids (or are they 18 by now?) upfront that today’s a reward challenge, the prize being a FaceTime with the eliminated contestants. Millie, still wanting answers, and Bowie, wanting to see Raj again, immediately dissolve their alliance. Everyone tries (except Chase, who had a phone the entire time and got to keep it three seasons in a row by not being as obvious as Julia was), but Millie comes out on top, ultimately learning about Nick’s alliance…and his crush. She has the decency to let Raj and Wayne say hi to Bowie. Chase learns something, too…

Episode 18. Nick decides Bowie’s more trouble than he’s worth, but rather than just telling everyone to vote him off (which he predictably finds overused), he decides to play a game of “show, but don’t tell”. So using that as the episode title. He immediately decides to play this on hard mode with the two remaining contestants who have the least amount of beef with him: the fangirl Felicity and the airheaded Chase. Surprisingly, this actually works and Bowie gets sent home, Nick realizing he doesn’t have to rely on others to make drama for him. Millie sees what he’s doing but is confused about his slightly convoluted methods, not helped by Nick’s complete and utter failure to explain himself, by this point completely smitten. Damien notices that Nick’s popularity is fading and decides to lie low for a bit rather than betray him or risk being associated with him.

Episode 19. Reward challenge time? With only Millie, Felicity, Nichelle, Chase, Damien, and himself left, Nick seriously considers playing the main villain. Chase is the odd man out, lacking any sort of alliance and still having sort of a target on his back, but he doesn’t seem too concerned. Millie struggles to approach Nick without breaking his heart, since while he isn’t really her ally, he hasn’t really done much to wrong her. After all, he’s a better partner than opponent.

Episode 20. Every villain has their nemesis, and Nick was not expecting it to be Chase of all people, but Chase outs him before Millie can. Damien sticks by Nick (in silence of course, because he’s still friends with Nichelle and to a lesser extent Felicity), but Millie’s conflicted. Nonetheless, Nichelle and Felicity start gunning for him, breaking up the alliance, and they would’ve gotten away with it too, if Chris didn’t remember sudden death challenges exist. Millie has the misfortune of finishing last and is sent home, but not before she decides to just ask him out, figuring she doesn’t have anything to lose at this point.

Episode 21. Notice a pattern? It’s another reward challenge! Scary Girl’s been in a rut lately, and the challenges have grown dull, so Chris has brought in many of TD’s most terrifying beasts, mutants included back on to spice things up a bit. Even the Dakotazoid returns, half the size she was before but now sporting wings for some reason. I guess mutations evolve. Chase chooses now to start caring about other people, but because it’s Chase it’s doomed to backfire horribly, given that it gives Lauren a wonderfully wicked idea…

Episode 22. …that involves locking people in closets. Specifically Chris and Chef. Scary Girl’s the host today and she’s back and more terrifying than ever. Nick, Nichelle, Felicity, and Chase put aside their differences (not that Felicity ever had issues with any of them) when the challenge becomes “Stop Lauren”. Aaaand now I realize Scarlett Fever was probably recycled from the scrapped episode where Dakota hosted the show after locking Chris and Chef in a closet herself. Anywho, Chase is fired on the spot for starting this whole mess…right before Scary kisses him, resigns, hops on the sling with him, declaring him her “boyfriend for eternity”. Chase has only half a second to process what the freshwater frick just happened before getting flung away.

Episode 23. Can you tell I’m getting tired? Only four remain, split between two alliances who used to be part of a greater one. Nick assures the others it’s nothing personal before things can start. Things happen, hijinks ensue, interns are mauled, but it’s ultimately Nichelle who crosses the finish line last. Better 4th than 12th or 14th. On that note, now we all know Felicity’s gonna be a finalist.

Episode 24. Nick and Damien part ways somewhat amicably, Nick knowing it was bound to happen eventually.

Episode 25. One final breather episode: this one’s just a big pre finale party! Really, the only thing the contestants need to worry about are Chase diving into the cake, Wayne and Raj freezing the pool, and Julia and MK doing their darnedest to bring the mood down.

Episode 26. A simple, no frills finale…is what I’d say if Chris hadn’t brought back every finalist the show has had (including Ezekiel, ostensibly because he got the TDWT prize money, but mostly to squeeze some mayhem in before Zeke’s first therapy meeting), in particular Priya, Bowie, Millie, Wayne, Julia, and Caleb. Damien vs Felicity vs Nick, battle of the nerds! Three go in…one comes out.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - There's so much airing even I'm struggling to keep up

That's why I'm late.

Aug 2023 Wk 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

Laws of Attraction (Sat iQIYI) 6 of 8 - Oh no. I am totally in love with the escaped young master & his smitten bodyguard. How did that happen? (Be careful P’Thee the broken ones are the most tempting. Tin understands.) NO SINGING! Trust Thai BL to destroy any moment of sentiment I might have by picking up a damn guitar. And we finally get Charn’s Batman villain origin story. Good use of back hug! This is a GREAT show. Melodramatic as fuck, but GREAT. Gotta say this pair in NOT Thailand’s best kissers but not everyone can be Zee++. Still I think that + singing + a touch of overacting is likely to keep this out of the 10/10 club.

Dangerous Romance (Fri YT) ep 1 of 12 - Rich /poor dynamic with characters & set up exactly as expected. Chimon is great. Perth is good too. A real rich-kid bully, Heirs level or Japanese F4 evil. All the teachers are also corrupt (that’s kinda a Thai thing, I think because they can't call out the government). I gotta say, Marc is doing a bang-up job as the jock friend, too. And the kiss twist was fun. All in all, this is good. And you know me, I love a high school BL.

I Feel You Linger in the Air (Sat YT) ep 1 of 12 - The time travel historical romance many of us have been waiting for. Adaption of y-novel by Violet Rain, from the producers of Lovely Writer. Heartbroken architect is transported to the 1930s. Nonkul (actor playing Jom) keeps reminding me of Cho Han Gyeol from Love Mate. It’s a bit slow to start but interesting when it hits its stride. The pacing feels like a Chinese historical (makes me wonder if this with be 4 or 6 act structure). Nonkul is a wonderful actor. They weren’t sharing the screen for long, but the leads seem good together. I’m in. 

Only Friends (Sat YT) ep 2 of 10 - Well. It’s entertaining, I'll say that for it. Addiction. Manipulation. Queer as folk & all that jazz. (No jazz for you, Thailand. Oh no! I’m giving them ideas.) I would like it to turn out that Mew is actually manipulating everything. This is his revenge con on Top. Mew is, after all, supposed to be "the smart one." Gotta say, this is darn near perfect casting. But honestly? This show could just be about Ray & Sand. Their story (and them in it) is easily the most riveting. Sand better be careful, the wildly broken ones are always the best in bed, because they don’t care ao they have no shame and that's HOT.

Hidden Agenda (Sun GMMTV YouTube) ep 6 of 10 - I like how soft Joke’s version of seme flirting is. It’s mellow, like his voice gets with Zo. I also liked Zo casually chatting to his friends about how he feels about being flirted with. His friends gave good advice & were supportive. Oh no! A boy in a BL went into the rain ALONE. What ON EARTH will happen next? The argument was interesting, because it gave us insight into Zo’s maturity & ability to handle a relationship. I’ve been wondering why anyone would like him, and now I know. Joke & Nita’s backstory is fun. I like the gay boy protecting the straight girl reverse beard action. On a complete aside, I really like Dunk’s makeup in this series. It’s very Kdrama.

Low Frequency (Sat iQIYI) ep 7 of 8 - The house ghosts trying to help are cute. The plot is at least... a plot? I don’t know. Dias Ex Mafia is a new one on me. (COME ON THAT’S A GREAT PUN, PRAISE ME!) I’m ready for this show to be over. 

Be Mine Super Star (Mon Viki) ep 7 of 12 - Honestly, the whole time I’m watching this I’m just thinking I wish JaFirst got better scripts. Speaking of, I don’t object, but these characters sure moved into sex fast. I really don’t quite understand how Daddy & Hot Doc got together so fast either. It feels like their story was meant to be spread out into the other episodes but didn’t get cut in properly, so it ended up all in this one? Or is it just the pacing is particularly bad in this show?

Dinosaur Love (Sun iQIYI) ep 8 of 10 eps - I have no idea what is going on. What are all of Dino’s friends doing? What do they want? what’s their point in the story? I’m even annoyed by Peak, and love him. Sex scene which they tried to make sexy. Operative word being tried. Although, there was some interesting after sex discussion about mechanics. And there was a cute bathtub chat about pet names. But this show is a lotta work for very little pay out. 

Wedding Plan (Wed YT & iQIYI) ep 5 of 7 - I like the sunshine sides? PUNCH LOM 2023! Trash watch here!

Love in Translation (Sat iQIYI) ep 1 of 10 - Pushy older bro is Earn from Love Sick, yay! And he’s the hyung of a side couple, which is "best friend’s older brother" trope! My favorite!!!! Have we seen this in BL before? I don't think so. Anyway, DOUBLE YAY! The main couple… eh. You know I loathe stalker characters. And I viscerally HATE this one. Almost as bad as SCOY, not sure I can take it, actually. The squealing of "Tammy!" is worse on my ear than any off-key guitar strumming. I may have to DNF or fast forward through all his parts… but he’s the lead. What to do? I do like the “Chinese” businessman actor. He very cute. (On an aside, I was just reading about commercial real estate as the loophole for foreign property investors in Thailand. Cool plot point.) I’m getting a Taming of the Shrew vibes from this. Just me? For now it's living at the bottom of the list for sheer unadulterated loathing of Phumjai. Not the actor, he was my favorite and only good thing about Our Days. But this character? NO.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Jun & Jun (Korea Thur Viki) ep 5 of 8 - This is basically the gay Boys Over Flowers of my heart. Or as close as I think we’ll get from BL. I like both of the 2nd leads, even though I suspect Simon of actually being into everyone’s fav hyung. Cute to see the Mr Heart boys back on my screen, oh so briefly. Such a Taiwan trick, reusing a beloved couple like that. Nice gimmie to the fans. Meanwhile, Choi Jun - boy sure knows his angles but his motives? Please don’t let this be another arranged marriage beard situation? I can’t take 2 in the same month. 

Stay By My Side (Taiwan Fri Gaga) ep 8 of 10 - The boyfriends ep! JC is biggest simp spoiling his baby EVER. Taiwan = the sappiest of saps. “Owning the same key” is such a cute way of putting it. Also I love the "knew all along" twist, made me happy. The angst is silly but that's normal in Taiwanese BL. 

Love Class Season 2 (Korea Fri Viki) eps 3-4 of 10 - Pair 1: Lee Hyun is such a wide-open, bleeding, no-shame romantic. It’s kinda great. Boy has a poet’s soul & NO artifice. J-Min is startlingly good, very nuanced. I know I keep saying that, but I’m v surprised by his skillz. And… add in creepy stalker, goody. Pair 2: The "other student couple" I’m not into, also NO SINGING. Pair 3: The underwear gift was so fucking funny. “I’m going reap the boxers I sewed” is next level script excellence. These two are brilliant at gayest-of-gay flirt-negging, I'm INTO IT. One of my housemates said, in response to my audible cackling, "You seem to be enjoying your shows extra much tonight."  

My Personal Weatherman AKA Taikan Yoho (Japan Sat Gaga) ep 2 of 8 - Oh I love love love them. It’s so old school yaoi and SO JBL. No other country could produce this kind of show. I love this little feminist aspect where the weatherman treats his boy like a 1950s housewife & said boy thinks that makes him an indentured servant. Clocks. But also, the way our weatherman LOOKS at his boy. He is so in love. (It looks like we skip next week for holiday reasons?) 

Sing My Crush (Korea Wed iQIYI) eps 5-6 of 8 - It remains enjoyable. 

Minato's Laundromat Season 2 AKA Minato Shouji Coin Laundry Season 2 (Japan Thu Gaga) ep 6 of 12 - At least we know Minato actually desires Shin, he just won’t do anything about it. Also, Minato chose the perfect person to come out to. That's nice for him. Finally, Shu & Asuka are glorious. Sides are winning these days.

Stay Still (Hong Kong Tues YouTube) ep 3 of 5 - A proper faen fatal has entered one of our couples. She won too, since she ended up marrying the boy. Still not sure about this show (and it should have convinced me by now). I definitely like the tattoo couple better than the reunion couple. Still, not a lot happened in this episode and this is short series, they don’t have time to waste. It remains intriguing but not... erm... good.

In case you missed it

River Knows Fish Heart is leaving Gaga soon. It's a decent little bully romance Chinese BL (pulp) - yes, you read that right. Actual CBL. Not great, but if you're into the CBL stuff, especially the early stuff, this has some of that tenor only made in 2018 (I have a feeling it was shot in 2017 and skated through). Anygay, just staying. Catch it before it disappears because with CBL once they gone, often, they gone forever.

Friend. Boy Friend a new Thai BL pulp was supposed to start airing on Aug 19th. I can't find it. Neither can MDL.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Everything from Thailand seems to be dropping on Sat & Sun this month. It's a good thing I got quiet weekends for a while. Also the BL firehose is upon us, so much content.

Starting this week:

8/20 (tomorrow) My Universe series (Sun iQIYI) 24 eps - This is sampler pack BL, 12 pairs, each pair gets 2 eps, not sure on the order they’ll drop. Known couples include EarthBank from Destiny Seeker and KaownahTurbo from Love Stage!!!, fresh faces otherwise. Jane to direct.

8/22 Kisseki: Dear to Me formerly known as Miracle (Taiwan Tues Viki & iQIYI) 13 eps - From screenwriter Lin Pei Yu (We Best Love, H3: Trapped) features a student doctor forced to take care of a gangster. I love the premise and like the writer.  

8/23 Why R U? (Korean remake iQIYI) 8 eps - I find everything about this hilarious. I mean if Korea remakes it, we lose all the sexy and then... would we have a story at all? No we would not. Not even for 8 short eps. It’d be like one of those mesh shopping bags.

8/24 Man Suang (Thailand movie, domestic cinema release) - historical drama about Thai burlesque with KP’s MileApo. 

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED).

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Another show reviewing itself. (Dino Love)

Don't insult bastards, Lom. (Wedding trash)

I would like this adorable romcom GMMTV, please and thank you.

See what I mean? Trixy.

Thanks boys. (All Only Friends)

(Last week) 

[tpher]

scary girl analysis !

something something the most clearly gimmicky gen 4 character we know. as your resident pahkitew island apologist, i dont care. it actually took me a bit to warm up to her and i figured id talk abt why that is

so her main thing is being creepy and sadistic for the sake of jokes. its not serious.. mostly. she does prove to actually be down to hurt others (such as when she got a hold of a jackhammer). but what about an instance where she wanted to hurt someone for actual reasons? when was that?

that was when priya went up to her to compliment her on doing a good job on the previous challenge. priya says that shes surprised by scary girl having done a good job.

scary girls response?

a very defensive "oh, it surprised you that i was good? cuz you thought id do bad?"

and thats the thesis of this post

scary girl is very insecure

backing up for a moment, in ep 2 when the teams were on ships and attacking each other, she was the one who came up with the idea of sinking the other teams ship as an idea on what to do when they were out of ammo (? iirc). but no one else heard that, just zee

then in ep 3, ripper makes her go last in the relay race thing bc he didnt want her to "blow things" for the team. she reacts by trying to bite his finger. not with a funny creepy smile, but with genuine anger to her literal bite. and then during that challenge, she infamously grabs a bear by the arm and starts beating it up while saying "thats what you get for growling at me!!!". once shes done, she goes "byeee" and goes on like nothing happened. proving that if someone wrongs her, she can easily let it go.. so long as she gets to do something back. remember this for later

and here we come back to her interaction with priya. so far, scary girl has proven herself to be a pretty alright player and she herself knows that. so the notion of someone being SURPRISED she did well?? does not sit well with her at all. but the way that she harps on the wording, even before zee steps in to make it worse, is what gets to me. it just really adds an extra layer to her character that, well. ironically surprised me! for someone who always seems to be in her own world, so unconventional, so ill-fitting with everyone else to also be insecure in some capacity?

anyway she tries to hurt priya with a spoon but gets interrupted. later on, priya is still thinking abt their encounter and feels bad so she tries to make it up to scary girl by flattering her. namely by saying that scary girls question was smart.. and priya being her awkward self, only dug herself in a hole by making it seem like that was a smart question by scary girls standards

scary girl is speechless. baffled. mad beyond words

it should be noted that scary girl looked offended when priya even started speaking. meaning that she also did not forget about their conversation that morning. she REALLY took it to heart. applying the bear logic here, had scary girl hurt her with the spoon earlier, would she be less mad? would she had considered each other even? and in that case, would this comment go over better or would it had simply restarted her need for revenge?

well. they dont interact for the rest of the episode up until the very end. after ripper used priya as a human shield, obviously injuring her

scary girl tells her that rippers a jerk and that priya didnt deserve that. so she'll be voting to get ripper out. and calls priya her "friend".

(her face and tone makes me a bit suspicious if this was genuine. but thats probably just her being her offputting self so i'll ignore it.) ok so by scary girl logic, priya deserved to have SOMETHING bad coming her way after what she said to her.

but not this.

scary girl, who came here to "make friends and watch them get really hurt", was not okay with what ripper did to priya. perhaps she thinks that only she could be allowed to hurt priya to balance things out? personally giving priya her karma, perhaps?

but now she considers priya a "friend". who likely wants to see her get hurt. but in the fun way that scary girl likely sees most other contestants as, possibly? idk.

anyway after all of that, we can see just how insecure scary girl can get over unintentionally awkward phrasing. just how deeply it hurts her feelings to be underestimated like that

season 2 spoilers ahead !!!

in season 2, we see even less of her. but there is SO much to work with

normal girl is so fascinating to me

by the time s2 starts, scary girl already has an all new look. shes trying to be "normal"

she admits in her confessional that some ppl thought she was too scary in the first season so thats why she changed her appearance and her everything. who were these ppl?

other than a dog as a joke, online forums, showing an interesting glimpse into the in-universe ""real world"" stepping into total drama. perhaps also a meta joke on the fandoms response to her but who knows. imagine unabashedly being yourself on tv and everyone is telling you to change. you are 16 and likely going through a weird phase. feeling a lot of heightened emotions already and ""knowing"" that this is who you are (at the moment). and if its not a phase? still 16 on international television getting lambasted by millions

and last but not least, her MOM??? her own mother. that just raises more questions abt how scary girl was before getting on td. was she NOT like this before? was she playing it up for the cameras? or did she just go unhinged without parental supervision? in any case the fact is that even her own mom wasnt okay with what makes her happy and how she presented herself.

so scary girls solution? to try her best to suppress anything that made her unique. to try to adhere to "societal norms", in her own words.

we dont see much of her in this ep other than her commenting on how shes normal and totally did not want to see someone get hurt. shes clearly struggling so bad. she knows that apparently what she likes isnt "right", therefore the opposite must be true, right?

she is simultaneously so immediately different that the others didnt even recognize her at first. yet still so "scary" that she cant fit in. she just doesnt know how no matter how hard she tries. if she were to stay longer, what can she do? this game is not only abt your skills in the challenges its also a social thing. how long until she snapped and went back to her old ways?

and then we get to the campfire ceremony. chef is about to call out whatever it was the she did wrong that day, but she interrupts him with a simple "no."

she cannot fathom being sent home, at least not this early. bc shes normal! she is sooo normal and she tried SO HARD to be normal! she read normal books and normal movies and studied normal people. she even taught herself to smile in a more acceptable way, which is so autistic coded to me. so she deserves to stay longer.

(getting flashbacks to my topher psychoanalysis and his entitlement being both a tragedy and his self-imposed downfall)

..but she studied "normal people" in her own not-normal way. while they werent looking. while they were sleeping. while they had no idea she was there.

so she got booted out for that. and she cannot believe it.

when she says that she "didnt even try to hurt anyone this time", she is mad. that was her ""fun"" and she managed to control it 100% only to get eliminated??? shes fed up!

but when she talks about how she taught herself how to smile in a "less-creepy" way?

she softens up and looks genuinely hurt.

she tried so hard. she saw all those horrible comments from people judging her based on like 5 episodes on a reality show. her own mother didnt accept her. her insecurity won and she aimed to change and repress everything that made her unique

and it still wasnt enough

[miss0atae]

Random Thoughts about The Rebound Ep 5 and 6 :

Let's give credit where its due, The Rebound remains a compelling story and these two new episodes haven't changed my view on the series. It's truly an interesting sport series. Even if you're not a fan of basketball or a fan of the main actors. I'm neither of those and I still find a real pleasure watching it. I would even say, it shouldn't deter you from giving it a chance.

▪️ So Ryu and Zen were back to square one in their relationship and they couldn't stand each other anymore in these episodes. Their disagreement was starting to be an obstacle for the team as they were constantly fighting on the court. Their coach figured out a way for them to make peace. He forced them to be tied to each other for 24 hours. When you can't escape the other one, you're forced to deal with it. It was easy to see they both missed each other, but what happened in the past is still remaining a sore point between them. Of course, Zen is still sad and lost about the disappearance of Ryu in the past, but we kind of get pretty fast that it's not the only thing which hurt him. From the beginning of the 5th episode, we had a flashback of Ryu and Zen when they were in middle-school. They were both showering and helping rubbing soap to each other. Then, they got this moment… There are a lot of interrupted moments between them. Zen was fully expecting Ryu to kiss him and he was eager to do it… but then Ryu freeze and decided not to do it. I believe Zen was clearly hurt by this too. Even if he can't really say it out loud, he has these very strong feelings for Ryu and he finds himself constantly disappointed by him. While being force to stay together all the time, Ryu and Zee's anger quietly dissolved to make they find their strong bond again.

▪️ The state of the team is totally linked to whatever Ryu and Zee are feeling when they are playing with the rest of the team players. When they are both in their right mind and happy with each other, the team is able to success in anything they want to do. Otherwise, when they are at odds or something is bothering them, the team isn't able to work well together. I'm not saying the rest of the players are just here to make contrast, but most of them remains solely background character. Only few of them seems to be important to the story: Jed who is mostly the comic relief, Prince who has a special bond with Jed (but it remains to be really seen), Shogun who is the basketball prodigy and Jedi as Ryu's friend. Lin is totally the token girl of the series who will be used to create some tension between the main couple as she has a crush on Ryu. Thankfully the story seems to have provided her with an alternative choice when she will see that she has no chance of being with her crush.

▪️ Last week, I thought it was Ryu who was hurt because he couldn't get Zen to see his feelings for him. I felt he was the one who was showing more his love. I think it was because both Q and Atom questioned him about it. It made me think it was him who was, at the moment, more in love or more aware of his feeling. However, now that I watched episode 5 and 6, it seems to me that it's the opposite. Zen is the one who has already accepted his romantic feelings for his friend, while Ryu isn't really sure about it. I mean, he likes/loves Zen. It was shown countless times, but at the same time, he doesn't really want to talk about it or to make others know about it. By the end of episode 5, we get a kiss between them. It was full of lingering feelings for something they wanted to experience before, but didn't get to. The way Ryu was slowly moving his face towards Zen to kiss him sweetly. He was also stroking Zen's hand. It felt to me like he was finally experiencing something he deeply wanted to do, for a long time. Ryu didn't have any hesitation and gladly consented to this kiss because it is also something he desires. The moment is truly precious for them and it is reinforced by the melody of the soundtrack. However, when Ryu heard the sound of the dropped bottle, he quickly opened his eyes and you could see how scared he was and he turned over fast. It left Zen alone who was still looking at him, as if he was still processing everything. Ryu was flustered and he was looking at the ceiling, while Zen was still looking at him, hurt again. I get deeply emotional thinking about this scene.

▪️ Let's talk about Atom now. I have to make amends. I was so hard on him last time after I described my thoughts about episode 3 and 4. I felt like we couldn't trust him and he would hurt Zen… Turns out, he is better than I thought he would be. I think he really wants to make a friend. Since he never really seems to have a real friend in his life, the first person who was nice to him, he got too attached. The way he wants to be close to Zen is so wrong, but at the same time, I believe he just doesn't know how to do it. That's why it gets across as clingy and a bit controlling. I'm not saying he is right. I'm just feeling like he needs to understand boundaries and how to create a healthy friendly relationship with someone. There is also the fact, that he doesn't just want to be friend with Zen, but he also has a tiny crush on him too. Atom has grown in a family that expects him to devote his time to sport. His father seems to be really authoritarian and Atom can't really do what he wants. It seems he made really a lot of effort to be available when he met Zen. I felt bad for him. It is not easy to grow up in a family where you have to constantly prove your worth and when they expect you to stand out. Now we know he is also a basketball player in a rival team. I'm glad he remains true to sport values and didn't befriend Zen because of this. Of course, he becomes the perfect love rival for Ryu and he seems determined to be close to Zen. I wonder what it will bring. Now that he is again in my good book, I feel like I'm back with the same dilemma I had while watching Deep Night where I couldn't decide if Seiji had to be with Pan or Ken.

▪️ I also felt really bad for Q. It seems to me that he is stuck in this life without any way of escaping it. Yes, his relationship with Boss Tos is hot, but at the same time it’s kinda pitiful. There is nothing sexy or healthy in their relationship. Q doesn’t seem to have any feelings for him and he only has sexual intercourse with him to protect Ryu. However, it’s not exactly working well and he is back into threatening Ryu to work for them and to play street basketball. Q is always dragging Ryu back to the trappings of his past. At the same time, we can’t deny the protectiveness Q has for him. I really think he has his best interest at heart, but unfortunately Q is not a big shot in the “streets”. He is just a small fry.

I really want to see what is going to happen in the next episodes.