#zane looks cool but kinda scary

[the-ninja-legacy-whip]

HELLO YES I´D LOVE TO KNOW ABT JAY´S EYE??? i´m guessing skybound related?? (i am SOOO curious abt your plans for skybound btw aaaaaa!!!!)

(adgsfgsdfass i actually hadn´t noticed it first, my dumbass went and looked at the pretty lights of the ferris wheel and brain shut down lmaoo, gotta step up my game >:0)

also damn!! those are some GOOD colors, the atmosphere is amazing!!!! been to the beach when the weather is like that, scary stuff!!!

Operation Rainbow Lights Distraction is successful *-*)9

Kidding, but it's good to know that his eye is both subtle yet striking! S'what I was going for!

Anywaaaay, explanation time! Grab popcorn and really think about if you're ready to discuss fantasy eye trauma before jumping in <3

So we all know Jay gets an eyepatch in Skybound, but in actuality Clancee just gives it to him for aesthetic reasons, even though Future!Jay was seen to have one back in S5. And, of course, the fandom has run rampant with all sorts of deliciously angsty ideas (blinding him, making it a different color, gouging his eye out, etc), but I...can't do that lmao

-Blinding his eye completely would cause too much of a butterfly effect for a lot of the things he does in later seasons, and I am already juggling enough subplots lmao. Besides, this is one of the common go-tos for him and I wanna take a different approach. -I can't change the color of his eye without going against my own established lore (I did consider just making it a light blue but a) that's also a common thing and b) would wind up looking too close to Zane SO—) -I don't have the stomach to gouge his eye out completely. I can tear Zane limb from limb, carve into Kai's face like a Christmas ham, and have Lloyd nearly lose a hand but I can't bring myself to do that aaaaaaaAAAAA–

BUT I wanted to do something interesting with his eye, and to do something at least a little bit different from what I've personally seen.

Soooo then instead of some kind of external injury (that is, a physical trauma caused by someone/something else), I started looking into the effects that Lightning can have on the eye (so for my purposes, something Jay would inflict on himself). Turns out there's actually possible "lightning injuries" that can occur on the eye (rare though they are), ranging from star-shaped cataracts, electrical burns, iris collapsing (kinda cool, but also ew and horrifying), and ofc effects on vision itself without just straight up blindness.

There's also that I haven't seen very many changes with his sclera (white eye part) either. From scleritis to simple eye strain, the eyes can become bloodshot...but, what if it was permanent, and what if it was from electricity?

ANYWAY I put all this info into a blender and made the following smoothie out of it:

So during Skybound, Jay gets chained up in Vengestone on Nadakhan's ship and mercilessly tortured, yadda ya, but instead of one of the pirates inflicting harm onto Jay, he still tries to force the use of his powers even through the Vengestone, which causes an internal surge within him (as his powers "run in circuits", and applying Vengestone essentially makes his powers an "open circuit", meaning they have no current to follow/no outlet to head towards, so all that power/energy just gets channelled back inward and goes nowhere)

...meaning that the force of the attempt "blows" Jay's eye out from the strain (not literally, but think of it like he's having a contained Outburst, with all that power trying to channel out through the eyes as it would naturally but it can't). The resulting flash/pain turns his eye glassy, makes his eye bloodshot (but instead of "blood" its with electricity, hence the blue), and affects the shape of his pupil (making it diamond star-shaped, though you can't really tell in the tarot card unless you squint).

Resulting complications of this are that his one eye becomes extremely sensitive to certain amounts of light, his eye tears up randomly and get easily irritated, it causes chronic pain on that one side of his head, there's a on-and-off haze around his gaze, and he does start to gradually get worsening vision as he gets older (but not until he passes on his powers to whomever).

He wears the eyepatch when the environment is particularly bright (or he's meeting someone new and doesn't wanna freak 'em out), but without both his eyes his precision and evasive ability gets hindered (which is inconvenient when you're lightning. Also inconvenient when you're trying to teleport and lack depth perception). So, sometimes it's a gamble of if he wants to miss his target, or to avoid excruciating, crippling pain.

But other than that he's fine <3

[neine]

List of very specific nostalgia things

Web game where everyone was a pastel blob, with a cut scene at the beginning showing you coming to an island from a cruise. Then it becomes (I think) a scooby doo type of game but not scary where you interact with others. I remember there being also a hotel, otherwise the island looked pretty empty.

Animated ninjago meme compilations, very old, very visibly made by a child (however you could see a huge potential). I specifically remember cooking by the book animation? Kawaii Zane and i think something cute thing Lloyd. I fucking loved them when I was a child. I think I read somewhere from the author that they used sketch-something program for animations and I tried using it but it was paid.

Harry Potter game, and i remember only the part where you were in a dark forest or something and you had to move a huge rock or something. I think it was based of a part where they were already much older. I remember the game to be quite detailed but i may be very wrong. I think the camera was just locked at one point.

Feary: Legends of Avalon. I found the title but there's no way for me to pirate it haha so I just have it favorited on my steam.

Minecraft by zyczu, Pet Party (it has like a billion names, you can find it on android now. It's laggy as hell tho), Avataria (its also on android), the game where you make an island with two zombies, The Sims 2, Margonem, Papatka, Hugo

That one very specific korean hair styling game

That one (flash i think) game where you make cement and place bricks????? I swear it's real 😭. I think it had pixel art, like a simple shit kind.

Slime game where you're a slime and you change colors of a city? Kinda like splatoon I guess? I remember specifically playing it on my cousin's PC. I remember a train... The whole city was gray....

One wizard game that I also played on his PC, a platformer, 2d, I remember cool music, the art style was kinda grunge I think, but it was very satisfying.... Ahh I don't remember much more. It was happening at night....

Mmorpg game where there are rovers or cars it was on some shitty looking space base?? Also the one with magical stuff + the pigeon game that one youtuber made a video about

Barbie 2d driving game. It was shit you needed to pick up some bitches in some specific time frame.

[robobirdie]

Some Fan Story Fun Protagonists interviews: Creatures and Robotics

While working when stuck with writers block I sometimes would take a break and have a little fun writing down what I felt the characters thoughts would be on certain things in the story. Some give some minor spoilers but nothing too serious about the main story or events in the story. They are fun humorous little tidbits some of which helped me with working out some concepts in my story namely character relations. This one is on the creatures and Robotics of the Lost Realm:

Ancestor Wing

Jay- I guess they’re not too bad. They are kind of cute and very friendly plus they eat bugs including the bad ones. They’re nice to have around especially at night when all the big freaky bugs come out.  Cole- They’re cute and real soft just be careful when petting them that you don’t accidently poke them in the eye. They don’t like that and will bite in defence and those little needle teeth of theirs can leave a pretty nasty bite.  Zane- Their looks are what others would consider adorable and their biology is quite interesting. They are capable of keeping both wing structures in synch while flying yet can move their arms independently from the winglets when moving on surfaces.  Nya- They are cute and their fun to feed from your hand. They’re so tame and gentle.  Lloyd- I find the mythology around these creatures interesting; that they can commune with and be messengers from those in the departed realm. I wonder if it’s true.  Kai- Their not too bad. I defiantly don’t mind having these around.  Aaron- They’re totally cool; soft, gentle, friendly and eat all the bad bugs who wouldn’t want these things around.  Axl- Did you know they can eat almost their own body weight in insects in a day! Sure they don’t weigh much but it still equals a lot of biting insects.  Clay- They are cute and very beneficial. They keep both crops and people safe from harmful insects, I get why the people treat them with such high respect.    Macy- They’re so cute you just want to hug them but you have to be careful. They have hollow bones like birds so you have to be careful not to hurt them.       Lance- Finally a creature that’s not creepy or annoying in this place.    Jestro- They are cute and very friendly.

Ash Walker

Jay- Huge and can eat me no thanks.  Cole- They’re not too bad. Yha they’re big and kinda scary but surprisingly gentle.  Zane- Despite what some think they are surprisingly gentle and empathetic to others. They will aid and protect other animals even those who could hurt them. They have great respect for all living things.  Nya- Despite what Jay says they’re not bad. They’re actually kind of sweet. If their babies get too tired or can’t cross a river on their own the parents will let the babies ride on their backs. How can such a caring creature truly be a monster?  Lloyd- Yha they are nice and not too bad but they are a bit scary looking.  Kai- I guess they’re not too bad, I just worry about accidently getting stepped on by them.  Aaron- They’re pretty rad. They don’t mind if you take a ride or even nap on their backs. They apparently let animals do it in the wild all the time.  Axl- Big and powerful yet gentle and caring; I like them. They remind me of me.  Clay- Contrary to what some believe they haven’t had very many attacks or problems from these creatures even wild ones. The real biggest danger you have with being around these is being under the wrong end at the wrong time.  Macy- I like them, sure they’re big and moody but they’re not really that bad; no worse than Axl when he misses a meal.  Lance- Luckily they have people whose jobs are to clean up what these things drop around town. What they drop strangely doesn’t smell too bad but I still don’t want to get that stuff on me.  Jestro- They might not be bad but their size still kind of scares me.

Creatures of Blackreach

Jay- Just more nightmare fuel. Dark glowing beasts that have no qualms with eating you and plant mutated zombie creatures controlled by mushrooms no thanks.  Cole- Some are kind of creepy yha like those Gloam-beasts but the others aren’t bad; kind of cool actually.  Zane- I find these all rather fascinating. The way they have adapted to a world without sunlight and dominated by fungi is rather intriguing. I would love to learn more about them and visit them and their home.  Nya- I guess the thought of creatures controlled by fungi is rather creepy but these things apparently aren’t as bad as you’d think. They don’t seem to have any desire to hurt others. They just want to protect their home I can respect that.  Lloyd- Yha it’s a little unnerving to think of but it actually doesn’t seem too bad. It might actually be interesting to see this place. I wonder if the fungi are annoyed by the caverns inhabitants eating them? Maybe they have some sort of symbiotic relation so don’t mind it.  Kai-I guess they’re not too bad, there could be worse things to come inhabit such a place.  Aaron- This place and its inhabitants seem so far out, I’d love to take a trip their and explore the place.  Axl- They don’t sound too bad so why are the people scared of them.  Clay- I get to come across one of these things in a dark place might be rather scary but I doubt they’re as scary as many proclaim.  Macy- How’s this whole controlled by fungi thing work? Is it some sort of magic or can it communicate with them in some way? Truly I’m more curious than scared of these things.  Lance- They sound cool but I don’t want to encounter these things in person. They probably are not very friendly and likely reek of an earthy rustic smell; I’m no fan of that.  Jestro- Even though many look like creatures above ground something about their dark with glowing markings appearance sounds kind of unsettling.

Insects

Jay-Why! Can’t bugs just stay smaller than sparrows for once? Then again even the little ones are kind of creepy here too. See through spiders, beetles that shock you in defence, mean crabs that make better deterrents than guard dogs, wasps that can burn you with a heat worse than Coles chilli do I need to go on? I guess though not all are bad. The Torchbugs are cute and those Rockipods aren’t too bad just be careful not to sit on them. It’s a bit embarrassing to fall off them when they curl up when you do that.  Cole- Yha quite a few are kind of creepy even if they don’t wish you harm but most aren’t too bad. I do kind of like those Torchbugs though. Rockipods are kind of cool too and very chill not to mention their shells are made of rock isn’t that cool. Don’t try to kick them like they’re a ball when they curl up though. As Kai found out those shells are rock hard, they’re a bit heavy even when they’re the size of a small dog so you can almost break your foot on them.  Zane- They’re not too bad. I don’t fear insects and find many just as fascinating as other animals but I just wish they would stop being attracted to my eyes. I keep accidently swallowing a couple of the small ones each day because they keep getting in my face especially when it’s not very bright out. It doesn’t feel or sometimes taste pleasant and those Shalk beetles really hurt. So do any species with spines, horns, large pincers or mandibles or other decorative or defensive structure. The noises of some like mosquitoes and flies near my ears are really annoying too. I do like the Torchbugs I just wish they wouldn’t be so interested in my eyes when it’s dark.  Nya- The big ones yha kinda creepy but some of the others aren’t bad. The Torchbugs are cute and the Lava moths rather pretty. The spiders I could go without. I wonder if those hornets are as hot headed as my brother; from what I’ve seen they seem like it. I wouldn’t doubt they are; I also wouldn’t doubt he’ll probably do something stupid around them and get stung. Just because they like the heat I don’t think they’re fans of fire. I won’t feel sorry for him if he gets stung, he probably will have done something to deserve it.  Lloyd- A lot of them are kind of unsettling yha especially when you find them hiding under things like your pillow. Sure I believe Zane that ant is harmless despite the spikes and horns and just scouting not wanting to hurt anyone but it still creeped me out. Thankfully he took it out of my bed and put it in the planter outside our room. How can he hold them without getting creeped out? Anyway not all of the insects are that bad or creepy though. Most beetles, crickets, grasshoppers, moths and butterflies aren’t too bad even if they are a bit big. The Roly-poly bugs aren’t bad and I do like the Torchbugs; it took some patients but I managed to get one to actually land on my hand. It was cute.  Kai- Not going to lie I’m not a big fan of bugs especially when their bigger than a songbird but I do like the glowing Torchbug, they’re kind of cool and those burning hornets are kind of cool they can wield fire just like I can. I wonder if that would make them see me as a sort of king or god to them? I should test it out. Also when these things are wearing a rock armour don’t try and give them a kick; I’ve never stubbed my toes so hard before.  Aaron- I don’t get why others are so creeped out by bugs. Sure they’ve got more limbs than we do but they’re not that bad; unless you accidently swallow one while speeding around on your hover shield that is. That’s not pleasant. Having them ping you in the face under the same circumstances isn’t pleasant either especially if they’re quite big. That can sting and not in a good way. Outside that they’re pretty chill and rad.  Axl- I guess they can be creepy especially the spiders but they’re not that bad, just don’t make them angry. Some have some pretty nasty powers and aren’t afraid to use them but aside from that most are pretty harmless. This is good cause then you can have some fun with them. That ninja Jay really gets spooked over a lot of the creepy crawlies. Me and Aaron like taking those little Embers Ants and spooking Jay with them. It’s funny to see his reaction to them especially when he finds them where he least expects them.  Clay- I’m not much for insects and yha some of these are creepy, defiantly the spiders and those big ants and their little cousins, but they’re really not that bad just creepy. Luckily most of them are generally easily to scare off even the spiders. Not all are bad or creepy. The butterflies and Torchbugs are pleasant and so are the Isopods. Even though they’re a bit creepy the little Ember Ants are harmless and a lot more even tempered than their large Spiny Ant relatives. It is a bit creepy though that you can find them hanging around everywhere in the city and people aren’t bothered by them even if you find them somewhere you don’t want to find them like in your bed, on the table while you’re trying to eat, in your helmet when you go to put it on... they do eat them here so I guess they’re not that bothered by them but it’s still unsettling. I guess it could be worse though. Other regions here have some that are much worse like sparrow sized mosquitoes, crocodile sized millipedes and bear sized spiders. Thank goodness we don’t have to go to those places.  Macy- Yha I’m not much of a fan for many insects especially spiders or things with too many legs like centipedes; millipedes and isopods aren’t too bad though. They’re not fast or as creepy looking as centipedes, they even look a little cute in that these are creepy crawlies but their nice and not too bad kind of way. Not all of them are bad or creepy and some here are nice and not too bad. The Torchbugs are cute and so are the moths. The little ants aren’t bad just more of annoying; gotta feel a little sorry for them. Some of us, you can probably guess who, have been using them to freak out that ninja Jay. Can’t be nice being used to scare someone like that.  Lance- Bugs ew no thank you; they’re gross always crawling around in the dirt and many have too many legs. It was funny though that one time Aaron collided with one of these Torchbugs while flying around it pinged him in the face and left a colourful glowing mark on his face for a few hours even though he had cleaned it off. I’m not sure why it was like that, the ninjas metal man said it was something to do with chemicals being absorbed into his skin or something I didn’t hear or understand much of what he said. It was a lot of science-y stuff I couldn’t care much about but how that ninja Jay reacted to it was hilarious. He acted all paranoid to Aaron for a while.  Jestro-I guess they’re not too bad; they’re not monsters just animals; well I’m not sure about spiders but the rest are just mostly harmless bugs even if they have strange powers like those shocky beetles. They really hurt. Sure some of them freak me out yha but they’re not too bad and the glowing torchbugs are pretty.

Ekhindahogs

Jay- Finally one of the few species that isn’t mean, ugly, creepy, wants to eat me or dangerous; these are cute and so funny to watch.  Cole- Cute little burrowers with comical attitudes; plenty to love about them though they can be a nuisance. They have pretty tough claws so the town does have problems with them digging through the walls of the Under-city and peoples basements and getting into trouble.  Zane- They are cute and have a rather interesting biology and social structure. Apparently to combat the harshness of their environment they developed so that both males and females can care and feed the young so if one of the parents dies their offspring won’t risk dying either.  Nya- They are cute and enjoyable but that whole males giving milk like mothers I find kind of weird. Nice to see a species where dad plays such an important role as mom but still I find it a bit weird.  Lloyd- They’re cute and playful and it’s kind of relaxing watching them playing around. It must be nice being so carefree; I bet the fathers also have good relations with their sons… sorry did I say that sentence out loud?  Kai- They’re not too bad just watch where you sit when these are near. They might kick dirt in your hair while digging in planters… well I’m hoping it’s just dirt in those planters and not well you know; I hope they don’t fertilize with manure in those things or I’m going to need another shower.  Aaron - First off the milk thing is kind of weird second they don’t lie about that venom; I didn’t mean to startle that one during training… man that sting was nasty. Felt like having the worst case of pins and needles ever combined with all your muscles being pulled at the same time! My leg was paralysed from the pain!  Axl- I like them. They’re not very soft and those beaks have a surprisingly strong bite but they’re overall enjoyable to have around.  Clay- They are cute but can be troublesome. A pair somehow got into our room and tried to make off with my shield. I can’t have that; a knight should never lose their shield.  Macy-They are cute but don’t let that fool you, they can be real troublesome especially when in groups and they want some of your lunch. I think they know their considered cute and use that to get lots of treats.  Lance- I found a social media page dedicated to these things that has way more followers than I do; how’s that possible? Sure they’re cute but can they act or pose no… though looking at these photos and videos I kinda see the appeal. Maybe I should add some pictures of these with me to my social media pages.  Jestro- They aren’t too bad but those quills hurt when they get stuck in you.

Fabricants

Jay- Combining dangerous animals with dangerous machinery; why would you want to create such monsters!  Cole- The thought of them is kind of strange. Do the creatures know and understand they are now half robotic? How do they feel about their situation?  Zane- I find them intriguing. I can understand them and what they have to say is interesting. Some understand what they have become, others aren’t too sure. They know they’re different but they all love what they’ve become. They feel it improves their life and lets them view the world with a deeper understanding making them deeper in aware to the beauty of the world around them. They also enjoy that they can now play with and take advantage of the machines people make. One of those for the training arena apparently has learned to hack vending machines to get treats from it.  Nya- I find them interesting; I wonder what inspired their creators to merge animals with machines and how did they do it? It can’t be an easy process.  Lloyd- They’re kind of cool but also a bit unnerving, those Venom-fang ones especially are creepy looking especially in the dark.  Kai- Animals merged with technology, something about that I find very unsettling. Maybe it’s because I don’t understand technology very well but they kind of creep me out.  Aaron- I think they’re cool. Did you know their cybernetics give them the ability to play video games? Imagine giving your pet that ability, you know how much fun you could have!  Axl- They kind of sound cool but also very dangerous.  Clay- Animals with the calculating and precise thoughts and movements of machines. That sounds like a dangerous combo to me. Hopefully they have measures in place to keep them from causing harm and chaos.  Macy- Sounds like a cool concept they’d probably make for good training partners but they can also hack into your phone when you’re not aware of it. Imagine your pet being able to tattle on you when you plan to sneak out for a party?  Lance- Why not just make the machines into animals in the first place instead of merging them with animals? You just make them smelly and drooly that way.  Jestro- Is it just me or does anyone else get goose-bumps from the thought of these things?

Fear

Jay- It’s in the name that’s how I feel about this thing!  Cole- Yha I’m not too keen on ever encountering one of these. Good thing they’re technically extinct.  Zane- While I may be a bit more resistant to damage than the others to attacks by this thing I still would not do well against it and likely receive fatal damage from it.  Nya- Yha I can see why they would give it the name they did. It probably wasn’t pleasant dealing with these things when they were around.  Lloyd- I think for things like this it is one of the few times I’m glad to hear something’s extinct.  Kai- big, lots of teeth and sharp clawed dangerous reptile no thanks. Let them stay as fossils.  Aaron- I’d want to say add the term less to its name and that’s how I’d feel about meeting one of these but that would be a lie.  Axl- Just the name of this thing unnerves me.  Clay-Luckily we won’t have to worry about facing one of these, I don’t think we’d do to well against one.  Macy- I wonder who the brave warriors to take these things out were. They must have been pretty tough to face one.  Lance- big nasty and drooly reptile, no thanks. Good thing this monster is extinct.  Jestro- Good thing these are extinct. I saw a stuffed one in the museum and nearly wet myself. It mustn’t have been nice having these around.

Hoofivore

Jay- It’s not a bug or reptile but I still find it a bit scary; it is after all a massive meat eating animal that could eat me. It’s sad what happened to them though.  Cole- These things actually sound so nice. They bond for life and are caring parents. They even look cute like giant horned dogs. Why would those snakes want to hurt them like that?  Zane- These creatures sound rather pleasant, it is sad that they are now so endangered all because of one races hatred to another.  Nya- Poor things, hopefully they can bring them back.  Lloyd- It’s a good thing what they are doing for this species considering what was done to them.  Kai-That’s not right attacking innocent animals just to spite other people.  Aaron- That wasn’t cool of these snake people to hunt down these creatures purely out of hatred.  Axl- Poor things, hopefully things get better for them.   Clay- Does the cruelty of some people know no bounds? At least now these creatures are in good hands.  Macy- I hope they taught these snakes a lesson for their actions.  Lance- Why would these snake people go after these creature? What purpose would wiping them out honestly have?  Jestro- Just because these creatures weren’t on their side didn’t mean they had to be destroyed, that’s a pretty monstrous act and I should know. I’ve worked with monsters.

Hyenoids

Jay- This will probably upset Zane but no thanks, they should just scrap these things.  Cole- I’m not sure what to think of these things. They’re not Zane that’s for sure but are they really the monsters everyone claims they are?  Zane- Why does everyone hate them? Haven’t they ever tried to get to know them? I doubt they’re truly the monsters everyone says they are. They’re not mindless machines; they are thinking feeling living beings just like animals and people.  Nya- I think we’ll need to be guarded with Zane around these things. I don’t think he fully understands they’re not like him. These ones were created for evil and don’t share his views or values. They are likely no more than monsters.  Lloyd- I find these things very worrisome. I’m pretty sure they’ll see a kinship towards Zane and may try to get him to join them. Given who they serve that would be a very bad thing.  Kai- No offense to Zane but I don’t like these things simple as that.  Aaron- They sound cool but at the same time worrisome; they’re very dangerous and might want to turn the ninjas cyber-bro to their side. That could be a very bad thing given what they serve. Even if they aren’t inherently evil they serve a monster who is.  Axl- I think we should try to avoid these things as much as we can; I don’t like the sounds of them.  Clay- We shouldn’t trust these things. From what I’ve been told the ninja are having a bit of trouble with their droid brother becoming over trusting to these things. That could be very bad.  Macy- From what we’ve heard these things are very unsettling; defiantly nothing like our friendly and helpful Squirebots.  Lance- The town should capture a bunch of these things and change their programming to make them servants then maybe the place wouldn’t be so peasenty… then again with this Stag thing around how would you be able to trust these things wouldn’t want them to enslave you or worse. Maybe they should just leave these things in the wild.  Jestro- Monstrous machines so human like you can’t tell the difference between them and people; does that sound a little unsettling to anyone else? How do I tell who’s who? I don’t want to fall to this monstrous leader of theirs; I’m done with the being evil kind of life.

Kaguar

Jay- Scary looking reptilian like beaked tusked cows; I’m not sure what to think about that but it does seem weird.  Cole- I like them, they taste like beef and I hear their meat is healthier than cows meat.  Zane- They are very helpful creatures and materials from them don’t taste too bad and are rather healthy you just have to be careful with those tusks; I hear they have been known to disembowel droids with them. I find that kind of unsettling.  Nya- They’re not bad, they kind of smell odd but you won’t notice a difference between their milk and meat and a cows.  Lloyd- Just pretend they’re a strange breed of cow and they don’t seem so alien even though they don’t sound like cows or look anything like them.  Kai- They may taste like cows but they ain’t docile like them. When they flaunt those tusks at you don’t take that as a sign that their showing off. That means they’re mad, trust me I found out the hard way.  Aaron- A cool looking mix between some reptile and a cow plus you can eat them. Not a bad creature.  Axl- I found some good recipes for their meat if you’re interested.   Clay- They’re not bad and useful but something about how they look at you when you walk by makes me uneasy. They look angry all the time.  Macy- Compared to some of the other things people keep as livestock these are one of the less strange.  Lance- Others can use such rustic methods of travel like these I’ll stick with my mecha-steed thank you.  Jestro- I guess they’re not too bad even though they’re kind of scary to look at.

Parrot Cruncher

Jay- I guess they wouldn’t be too bad and be rather cute if it wasn’t for their venom, those quills and their strong nut cracking parrot beaks. Luckily they usually won’t bite with their full force on you with those but I’m not going to take the risk. They can bite with enough force to break your arm!  Cole- They’re not too bad though very annoying if they try to steal your lunch. I think they know they have a venom that messes with us cause they don’t have much fear to people even wild ones. Trust me if they take your lunch just let them have it. Just touching them will make the parts you touch them with go numb and you lose functioning to them which can mean a full body paralysis if you try to wrestle them to get your lunch back.  Zane- It’s creepy to have venoms affect me. I can feel the stuff mess with my programming when it contacts my nervous system. I’m not sure how it is affecting me, I think it’s some sort of magical effect, but it’s very unsettling and I am unfortunate to not benefit from anti-venom shots so I have to suffer the full effects of the venom for its full time. It’s not pleasant.  Nya- In ways they’re cute but I think their dangers really hinder their cuteness especially if you’ve dealt with their venoms. It’s very unpleasant and removing those quills is pretty hard especially when you have to pull them out of a droid. You have to wear gloves when touching the quills and they can easily get stuck in metal.  Lloyd- Cute but rather annoying. We’ve all had the unpleasant misfortune of getting affected by their venom and quills at least once while here. Most of them were by accident usually from training though Cole kind of asked for his the one time when he tried to wrestle it to get his lunch back from it.  Kai- Yha the venoms not too nice but at least it’s not lethal and wears off quicker than you’d think about four to five hours. Truly that’s not too bad. The creatures aren’t too bad themselves and very passive. Unless they feel threatened they won’t attack.  Aaron- Their pretty cool; they’re like someone mixed a parrot with a capybara then gave it quills like a porcupine. They like to chew like all three animals too. These creatures have a habit of chewing up wooden items to keep their beaks trim. The towns taken to making all important posts and signs within these creatures reach out of metal to keep them from chewing them up.  Axl- While they eat largely plant matter like fruits, vegetables, leaves and stuff like that they do and will eat meat. They’ll eat smaller animals, carrion and bugs. Luckily they are very food orientated so you can use that to herd them away from where they aren’t supposed to be so you don’t have to actually touch them.  Clay- As far as the creatures in this place go these ones aren’t too bad; yha the venoms annoying to work with or around but they aren’t too big and while annoying the venom isn’t lethal. Quite a few people like to keep these as pets. They’re apparently very dog like in temperament. If you want to keep them as pets though you have to get their venom sacks removed or you can’t really touch them and they will leave traces of their venom all around your house.  Macy- They’re kind of cute, probably would be cuter if it wasn’t for the fact that you can’t touch them without getting poisoned. Sure it won’t kill you but the poisonings not fun. Imagine needing to scratch your nose but having both your arms paralysed. It’s not fun.  Lance- Not a fan of the venom but at least it doesn’t mess with your looks. It sure doesn’t feel pleasant though, I prefer to just sleep it off unlike some who try to fight it. You should remember though if you’re going to pass out from the poison do so behind a locked door where others can’t get you; I’m still pretty mad about what Axl and Aaron did leaving me on a bench in the Under-city like that. It took hours to fully clean off all the makeup and markers people drew on me with!  Jestro- They are cute and friendly but someone should have told me of their venom. I hadn’t read the book yet and Lance told me they were safe to pet; he purposely messed with me. It was scary when I lost feeling and use in my hand.

Pryphon

Jay- Cute, Playful and friendly but loud defiantly loud! They wouldn’t be so bad if they weren’t loud and full of attitude and if they couldn’t guilt you into giving them things; they especially love food. They also love to watch TV and when you play video games just don’t let them near the controllers cause they’ll chew off the buttons.  Cole- Cute but watch out for that bite. They can crack coconuts with it so you don’t want them using it on you when they’re mad. They can also chew up a wooden chair in around 20 minutes if you let them. Also unless you want to give some of what you’re eating or hear an earful then don’t eat around them. They’ll beg for food and if they don’t get any they somehow give these really sad eyes or will throw a tantrum and yell… I had to share a sugar cookie with one. They can’t really pull off facial expressions but somehow it gave me such a sad look I just had to give it a piece. I felt guilty for not sharing with it.  Zane- They are what many would consider cute along with entertaining, caring, intelligent and emotional creatures who enjoy being a part of the family. They are defiantly an enjoyable species though loud at times and have surprising mimicry abilities. Thought I kept hearing some of the others phones ringing the other day even when they weren’t around for over an hour turned out it was one of these just messing with me; I know it was messing with me because it laughed when I caught it in action.  Nya- Cute, playful and friendly defiantly one of the more enjoyable creatures here and I’d have to agree with Jay they can be quite loud and are full of attitude. Trust me if they’re being loud or moody don’t yell back at them. They’ll just get louder and start throwing things at you and you don’t want them to bite you.  Lloyd- I like these. They’re cute, friendly, family orientated, caring and playful. It’s enjoyable to watch them play together. Did you know they have a noise just for play that gets everyone in the mood to play? You should be careful though they are quite destructive. They’re playing often involves tearing things apart and causing mayhem and they like to steal things especially if there’s food involved. I’ve even heard of them breaking into people’s homes to steal things and cause mayhem.   Kai- I can defiantly see the appeal to these creatures. They are cute and entertaining but loud and messy. They like to play with your hair for some reason and enjoy stealing things so keep an eye on your belongings… had to distract them with some food to recover my phone the other day.  Aaron- These are fun and rad looking but their loud calls waking you up while you sleep is so unpleasant. I think they do it on purpose too, I’m pretty sure I heard some of them laugh when they did it.  Axl- They’re so friendly you can get the more tame ones in the city to eat rate out of your hand. They love peppers, apples, watermelon, corn rate off the cob, potatoes and chicken. I heard they’ve actually on rare occasions been known to hunt chickens; they must really love chicken.  Clay- These are cute and enjoyable to have around but you can’t let them distract you when you’re working. I will admit it is a bit hard to stay focussed when they’re playing near you especially when they are in groups. Somehow they know how to catch your attention and if you’re not careful get you involved. While I was watching two play fighting another stole my shield and took it into a tree. I went to retrieve it then it dropped down and started running around with it. The other two joined it and they played a game of keep away with me for longer than I would like to admit… around thirty minutes. Even worse it was in public, it was embarrassing.   Macy- Their so cute you just want to hug them. I hear though that’s a bad idea. They are quite nippy and can do a lot of damage with those beaks. They also apparently don’t take kindly to being hugged unless they want to be. They’re very opinionated creatures.  Lance-They are cute but they don’t like to have their pictures taken and can be quite rude; most of the pictures I got of them are them trying to bite the camera or giving me their butts!  Jestro- They’re so funny and adorable I get why they are sometimes called the jesters of the wastes. If only I could be as good at entertaining as them then maybe everyone wouldn’t think I was a failure.

Retch

Jay- Floaty leathery jellyfish things; sure their relatively harmless but they still creep me out. I think it’s because of how they just float there kind of mindlessly and they have no eyes and the noodly tentacles, the glowing bits which make it creepier in the dark like all you see is their glowing markings just floating in the dark… that’s so unsettling! I’m not scared of them just more of creeped out by them. They apparently have smaller relatives you can find in some swampy forests, some caves and places underground. I don’t know if shrinking these things would make them less or more creepy. Cole- What do I say other than they just confuse me; they’re apparently some sort of Jellyfish, I can kind of see the relation a bit but other than that they just confuse me and I think I’m with Jay in that how they just float around is weird and unsettling. Their kind of mindless too like regular jellyfish and just randomly float around eating bugs especially flying ones like flies and the plant debris off the floor. They don’t seem to have much going on in their brains though they don’t have a brain… I guess that explains why they’re so mindless. Zane- These things are very confusing. How are they staying in the air without wings or artificial forms of propulsion? How are they staying a float and how do they keep from floating away? I get their tail helps them move but they have no eyes at least I cannot see any though apparently they do have photoreceptor cells, the structures in organic organisms that are precursors to eyes. They apparently have quite a few of these in their head region. Is that how they navigate? If not then how do they sense the world around them? Can they sense it much? They don’t have a brain so can’t sense the world like we can. They can’t be made or share a similar anatomy to jellyfish despite relations because a jellyfishes anatomy cannot survive outside water so what are they made of and how do they work? They are cool but all that is confusing about them un-nerves me. Even though it is a bit creepy how they just float around is kind of relaxing and calming to watch. Nya- So they’re like air jellyfish; I guess that’s not too bad. They’re not venomous like normal jellyfish so it won’t hurt you to bump into them or have the tentacles touch you; they can however produce electricity to shock anything they consider a threat so you have to be careful around them. Luckily they are rather docile but yha they’re kind of creepy; especially during a dark night. Strangely these things will also go underwater sometimes; I don’t know how they do it. They’d probably have to eat a bunch of rocks to counter the rising effect that lets them float unless they have some sort of magic that lets them do that. Lloyd- Yha something about them is unsettling yet strangely relaxing; seeing them floating in the dark yha very creepy but watching them mindlessly float around during the day can be oddly calming. I know they’re harmless but I just can’t get myself to get close to them. You know they made some of our armour from their skin. It doesn’t seem any different from normal leather. It stretches more than normal leather and apparently has some resistance to elemental magic. Other than that it’s no more different than regular leather. Kai- In one word they’re strange. Jellyfish like creatures that float in the air and can be just as sparky as Jay. Even stranger they farm them here. Not as food since their meat is poisonous to humans and will make droids sick but for their skin to make leather and this jelly that they use to make paralysis poisons. Apparently it’s not easy to farm them. Hard to contain something that can float away and they can wield electricity like Jay making them hard to work with. Truly I don’t see why they would bother with that. Did I also mention they can be creepy to look at especially in the dark? Aaron- I would say they are cool if they didn’t confuse me so much; all that confusing just makes me a bit nervous about them. I can tell you though accidently flying into them is not nice. They’re not as soft and squishy as jellyfish, that’s thanks to the armour plating and some internal hard parts that help their bodies retain their shapes without water to support them. Those though are not what makes hitting into them bad. Luckily they’re not venomous but that shock they can give you is pretty wicked, not as bad as Jays when he panic shoots you with a bolt of lightning but still it hurts pretty bad. Axl- How can something pretty harmless with not much of a brain that looks like a balloon made of leather be so creepy? If the floating isn’t unsettling enough seeing them floating in the dark where all you see is their glowing markings is even worse. Even weirder they are like insects and are attracted to lights which can be very unnerving to see these things suddenly float up out of the dark to come bump into the lights. Luckily the big ones usually won’t show up to your porch but they have a smaller relative that’s no bigger than a large pigeon found near swampy regions here that will and it’s more decorative with more glowing spots than the big ones so they’re even creepier to see in and float out of the dark. Clay- Yha I’m not sure what to think of these. Defiantly seeing them in the dark is creepy and the floating is weird. Their whole anatomy is confusing too. They are pretty passive at least so that’s nice. They could be worse. I hear these things have small pint sized cousins in some mountainous areas known as Sky Lamps that are parasitic feeding off others like mosquitoes and have a set of sharp spear like tentacles to help them grip their victims. I would not want to encounter those. Macy- Yha even after being here a while I still find them creepy particularly at night. A lot of the natives don’t mind them I guess they’re used to them though most from regions where these things and their relatives aren’t found feel the same as us; creeped or unsettled by them. They’re at last passive, if they weren’t they probably wouldn’t be very pleasant to have around. They at least can be humorous at times such as when they float into a clothesline or decorative light strand and get them stuck on them as they float around. Lance- Apparently this creepy floating jelly thing has a jelly they harvest that can be used as a decorative hair gel. It can give your hair a colourful glow in the dark. Sounds interesting but the extreme numbness, strange tingling feelings like someone’s sending electricity through your skin, some get rashes and have their hair fall out and the possibility of paralysis you can end up feeling from or having using it will have me steering clear of it. It sounds cool but I would rather not risk the possible effects. Who knows what damage they could do to my looks. Jestro- Weird and a bit creepy, the fact they can shock you with those tentacles makes them even more unnerving. Did you know the Ashers think these are a delicacy; obviously they must be immune to their poisons. The meat is poisonous. They like to force their prisoners to eat a tiny bit of this or anything else that will make you sick or weak to weaken them so they won’t fight back. Trust me that isn’t pleasant.

Constructs

Jay- Nothing against Zane but conscious calculating machines no thank you! You know most of the types don’t have eyes that can blink; they could secretly be watching you whenever you least expect them too! That young knight Robin found one of the snake ones and fixed it up and I found it the one day on a shelf in the main room. He claims he just left it there earlier and it was inactive but I swear there was light in its eyes and it was watching me slowly moving its head to keep an eye wherever I went! Cole- Yha these things are a bit unsettling but they’re not evil or monsters like what some think. They’re just machines. Whether their as special as Zane or not I’m not sure, most of them probably not; they’re really simple compared to my buddy but that doesn’t make them evil besides I’m pretty sure I’d side with them on some things. If I had a stranger walking into my house uninvited yha I’d attack them too especially if they’re there to take things without my consent.   Zane- I get they are kind of unsettling but they are not evil. They just want to protect their homes so why does everyone hate them? I know they are not as advanced or special as me, some largely the militant ones, are barely more than machines but they still don’t deserve to be hated so much. They are just doing what they were made to do how does that make them evil? Why do humans hate things that aren’t truly human… I’ve never done anything wrong to the people here so why do they see me as an evil machine like these things? Nya- They’re cool but they’re also dangerous and unpredictable. We should be very cautious with these things. Many were designed to protect their homes and masters even if their main purposes were in other tasks so they come with some pretty serious defensive abilities. Despite what Zane thinks these things aren’t like him. Generally they’re way more simple than him and I don’t think they’ll consider him an ally at least not on first sight. He shouldn’t be as trusting to them as he is; that could prove dangerous. These things can hurt him just as much as they can to the rest of us. Also on record I don’t think they’re spying on us like Jay thinks; I think he’s just a little paranoid there. Lloyd- In general these things kind of unnerve me. The fighting ones I defiantly wouldn’t want to get in a fight with them but those little ones the snake, beetle and rat ones are scarier. They’re stealthy and they can be there without you realising they are there… I think I’m with Jay a bit here that some of them like to watch us. That Serpeton Robin has I found under my pillow once and I saw it sneaking behind me trying to remain hidden once. Even creepier I once woke up in the middle of the night and saw it curled onto the bedpost staring down at me... that was very unsettling. Kai- Me and technology don’t get along very well, odd cause me and Zane get along pretty fine then again he’s special, very special and he’s nothing like these things. These things are very simple, some of them are kind of animal like, they are no way as smart, they don’t really have feelings at least I don’t think they do… that snake one Robin has though was acting all dramatic once when I wouldn’t let follow me to the bathroom when I went to have a shower. I had to let it in to keep it from drawing attention… it just wanted to sit on a counter and watch me do my hair and brush my teeth… it was creepy. Anyway they’re dangerous and unnerving so I’m no fan of them. Aaron- Sure they’re dangerous but so is a blender and you don’t see people freaking out and hating those when they get hurt by them. That makes me wonder maybe if these metal dudes gave you a milkshake or smoothie before tossing you out of their home then maybe people wouldn’t be so scared of them. Anyway personally I think their pretty cool and their danger makes them cooler. Axl- They’re kind of cool and can be very helpful when programmed right, that one Robin found can be very helpful. If you need help finding something it can find it for you though it might not have the strength to bring it to you. A can of pop sure it can handle that, your axe when you misplace that yha that’s too heavy for it. Even though they can be helpful something about them still unnerves me. Clay- I get they’re not inherently evil but it’s easy for dark forces to sway what they want and some of these things are easily corrupted by dark forces. We should be careful with them. I’ve asked Robin to keep that Serpeton he found and refurbished shut down when it is not in use and I trust his word that he is doing so but somehow it keeps ending up active and somehow sometimes the best I could describe it as is observing us. Even odder it’s locked up at night yet Lloyd has told me he has seen it in their room at night… maybe he was just seeing things if not I’m scared to think of how and why that thing was out. Macy- I guess they wouldn’t be too bad if it wasn’t for the fact they can easily be controlled by dark forces and are pretty tough combatants. They can defiantly give you a work out and a scare. Came back into our room the one day after having a shower and Robins little snake one he found was sitting on the dresser in our room staring at me. It wasn’t there before and it seemed to watch everything I did. That’s kind of creepy. Lance- A living machine that can burn my hair off by spitting fire from its face no thanks plus these things have brains that can connect to technology like your phone or tablet right. Do you know what kind of damage they could do by hacking your devices… especially to your social media profiles! That would explain why that robo-snake Robin has was playing with my phone the one day and how some of my selfies ended up with those fake moustaches and paintings on them. Did that thing think those were funny? I wonder if Ava could program something to keep that thing from hacking my stuff. Jestro- I don’t know they kind of unsettle me. How can you tell when they’re actually sleeping or if they’re pretending to spy on you? I’m pretty sure the others are using the snake one Robin has to keep an eye on me. I’ve seen it following and watching me wherever I go.

Skeever

Jay- Garbage eating scavengers with bone crushing jaws not to mention they sound scary, are bold for wild animals, just as stubborn as Kai, as possessive of their foot as Cole, just as resilient as Zane and people want to keep them as pets?! Why? Why would you want one of these? They’ll try to rip each other’s ears off when they’re mad at each other, they rarely get infections no matter how many or how bad the scratches and bites they get are and even when young they fight each other just to get fed by their mother. Why would you want such a creature for a pet?  Cole- I don’t think they’re that bad. They’re just animals not monsters. Sure they sound a bit scary especially when you hear them fighting at night and they’re hot headed like Kai but other than that they’re actually pretty nice unless they have food. I don’t blame them though for that, I’m not going to let others near my food either. Well maybe I’ll let Zane near it cause he won’t take everything if I offer him some unlike some others. Offered Jay some cake once and he left me a sliver of it! Yha I get why these creatures will bite your fingers off for taking their food, I’d do it too especially if you take most of it when I said you could only have a small piece!  Zane- These creatures are not that bad. Much of their supposed aggressive behaviours are over exaggerations due to dislike of the creatures. They get a bad rap because their lifestyle and appearance does not match with what humans find cute or desirable but when you look past what people don’t like about them you will find there is plenty to love about these creatures. They are kind, very intelligent, actually quite gentle most of the time and quite caring especially to family members. They’ve even been known to come to the aid of others of their kind when they need it and will aid their injured companions. They’re fighting is used to establish dominance and in truth is no more aggressive than many other social carnivores.  Nya- You’d think for an animal that will eat anything even dead and rotting things would smell bad but they actually don’t smell any worse than a cat or dog. They actually like to keep rather clean and enjoy bathing and relaxing in water. Also Jay thinks their fighting while kids makes them unpleasant, obviously having never grown up with a sibling he doesn’t get that yha sometimes you’ve got to fight with your siblings when you want something. There’s nothing wrong with that it’s normal. Lots of siblings do it both human and animal.  Lloyd- At first they seem intimidating especially when you get them in a group but after a while you’ll see they’re not that bad well except when food is around but even then they’re not too bad; they’re no worse than Cole when he’s hungry and you bring food around. Especially if it is cake; I think Cole beats the creatures there especially if you take too much of it or don’t ask before taking some. Anyway they’re not as bad as many make them out to be.  Kai- Will eat anything and gets cranky around food, are we sure we’re talking about this creature and not Cole :).  Aaron- I don’t care what others think I think these little critters are quiet rad. I wouldn’t mind having one as a pet. I hear they’re actually quite good pets like a weird cross between a cat and a dog. They’re easily trained, love boxes and things to scratch and chew, they’ll play fetch and follow you around and they can also use a litter box. They are though apparently hard to keep out of places you store food when they’re hungry; that’s no different from dealing with Axl.  Axl- Why is getting moody around food a bad thing? I get their mood I wouldn’t want someone touching my dinner when I’m trying to eat either.  Clay- Truly they’re not bad. Defiantly a bit of a nusciance especially when some leave food and garbage lying around because they won’t pick up after themselves, I won’t say names but they know who I’m talking about. They left the parts of our meal one night that they refused to touch because they found it too gross and peasenty in his words to eat anything made with bugs on a table in the common room. It drew in a pair of these which I had to remove. Every time I took one out the other just rushed back in, I had to get Macy to help me remove them because he refused to fix the problem he had made not wanting to touch or get close to the creatures.  Macy- Yha not really dangerous or bad; really not much differently from feral cats. Luckily you can grab them on their scruffs to keep them from biting, scratching and squirming just like cats. Really helpful when you have to move them from places they’re not supposed to be like in the living quarters after someone won’t clean up after himself.  Lance- They may be clean but they still eat dead and rotting things including things that had some pretty nasty diseases. I’d rather not get close to something like that. Sure they’re immune to the diseases but I’m not and I’d rather not catch something especially if it messes with my looks and they have a few of those here.  Jestro- I feel for them. They get hated just for doing their thing and being themselves. I know what that’s like… it’s not nice.

Tree-bill

Jay- I guess they’re not too bad. Friendly and playful, they are cute especially the babies but they are loud though, sometimes very loud, and their nimble fingers can get into a lot of things. Watch your pockets when they’re around, they like to steal candies and cookies. Cole- They’re cute and very friendly; I get why people like them and why they like to feed them even though the city officials don’t want you to. They don’t want to encourage the creatures to be too friendly or become dependent on people for their survival. It’s fun and rather relaxing to interact with them though. Their faces kinda look like a ducks and like ducks people like to feed them bread. That however is not the recommended thing to feed them though. It’s bad for their health and the environment. Zane- They defiantly are highly curious, a little too curious sometimes. One found the control panel in my arm and kept trying to play with it. I was not comfortable with that. Thankfully Cole got it distracted by handing out some bread for them to feed on. Nya- They are cute but you shouldn’t let that fool you. They are very mischievous and seem to enjoy getting into trouble which can be really annoying. The town has a bit of a problem with them chewing through things especially wooden items and measures to discourage them never work. They’re smart enough to find ways around them. I also found spraying them with water doesn’t discourage them from their mischief, in fact they like that. Lloyd- I love how they are very family orientated with everyone helping each other though they also cause mischief together. One stole my phone while I was petting one of them. It distracted me so its family member could steal my phone! Zane managed to get it back for me though it found out about the panel in his arm and kept bothering and messing with him through it. Luckily Cole was able to get it to leave him alone. Kai- They are cute but can also be very annoying especially when they keep trying to steal your food and I found they aren’t affected by hot sauce so dousing your food in that won’t stop them from stealing it. Aaron- These little things are quite rad. You know they can swing through the branches using both their arms and tail to grab branches; pretty cool huh! Axl- These things are crafty. They know they can trick people into giving them food by taking things from you. They also know how to break into things like coolers, rubbish bins, sheds even people’s homes! Clay- They wouldn’t be too bad if it wasn’t for the mischief they like to cause. That one Ghidorah found Robins Mini-trex and began playing with it even with Merlok still on it. He drove it around the hall in the bedrooms and crashed it into one of the planters. He gave Merlok quite the scare. Macy- Don’t let their cuteness fool you. They’re loads of trouble. If they can get into trouble they’ll do it. I’ve heard some of those hear describe them as eternal toddlers with pliers for faces. Seeing what they can do and the mischief they can cause I can see why they say that. Lance- Their not bad and you can take selfies with them. People here like seeing selfies with them. I think the creatures like it too. They seem to enjoy being the center of attention. They also like to try and groom your hair; I wouldn’t mind it if they had clean hands. I’ve seen what they do and handle with those paws of theirs. I don’t want that in my hair! Jestro- They’re fun and funny to play with and they don’t seem to mind my comedy routines in fact they seemed amused by them. They also like to play keep away with anything you drop while juggling and they will bite if you try to get it back without bargaining with food.

Venom-fang

Jay- Fast, agile bird lizards with a lethal venom. How can people feel safe with these things around? At least they have anti-venom shots for these. I carry two on me at all times. One for me and one for Nya; she doesn’t think it’s necessary but I think she misjudges the danger of these things. Their venom can hurt Zane; you know it’s bad when it can hurt him! Cole- Honestly you see a picture of them and they don’t look too bad but to experience them first hand is something else and that venom… you don’t even realise you were bit and are hallucinating. Zane- I don’t like how their venom can mess with my mind and senses and worse I could not even tell it was affecting me. Worse to prevent problems the others had to clean the venom out of damages they left in me and I accidently gave Nya a black eye… I didn’t mean to I thought she was a bear trying to tear me apart. Then again it wasn’t much of my fault she and Jay should have waited for the venoms effects to wear off before helping me. Nya- I get Jays fears but I don’t think we need to be carrying these anti-venom shots all the time. Yha these creatures are a bit scary especially the strange reflective quality to the stripe on their sides in the dark but unless we give them a reason to attack I don’t think they will. Also when some ones affected by their venom wait for it to wear off before helping them; you could get hurt from their hallucination especially when they have metal skin and bones. Lloyd- If it wasn’t for what they can do and how creepy they look in the dark they could be cool. Having to deal with the aftermath of their venoms isn’t a pleasant or easy affair either. After they got poisoned by that session in the arena with the maze Zane gave Nya a black eye and Cole started eating the wooden table coasters to put cups on in the main hall thinking they were cookies. It was not easy keeping both under control. Kai- Yha something using hallucinating venom that also turns out to be lethal no thanks; I’m going to steer clear of these things; very clear. The hallucinations however were funny to see especially Aaron when he got bit that one training session. He gets even more crazy and a bit wild like a cat on catnip with that stuff. I managed to trick him into biting Jay and his panicking afterwards was priceless. He thought he was going to get whatever curse he believes Aaron has and made Merlok and Clay hit him with a bunch of spells to cure him. Lance has gotten footage of all those that have been infected by these venoms, I’m goanna get some copies of those; they’ll be fun to have. Aaron- Yha I’m a fan of extreme beasts but these are something I feel are best admired from a distance. I’ve experienced quite a few of the venoms from the creatures from this place all were unintentional despite what that ninja Jay thinks and man they are not pleasant. The hallucinating effects of some like these guys is not a pleasant feeling, it really messes with your head. Axl- Trust me they may be small but they’re no less nasty than the bigger guys especially when they’re in a group and with that venom, it was not pleasant. Clay- Despite how dangerous they are and the problems their venoms create these creatures don’t often attack people and when they do it is strictly because their hungry not to be evil. That being said they are not creatures to mess with. They are very dangerous and that venom can really mess with people. That stuff had Axl thinking Aaron was a were-wolf for several hours, I think some of Jays paranoia influenced that. He kept trying to muzzle Aaron so he wouldn’t bite anyone and kept trying to get Merlok to cure him. Aaron was not pleased by the activity nor Axl constantly trying to lock him in a dog cage when he kept removing the muzzle. He bit Axl to scare him and that worked too well. He locked himself in a dog cage the rest of the time thinking he would become a were-wolf. Macy- Yha they’re dangerous but they’re just animals not monsters. You make a lot of noise and wave a weapon or even just a stick around and they flee. Sometimes a couple good whacks to their hides helps drive them off. No special weapons or Nexo Powers needed. You do need to be careful not to get bit though. Their venom is pretty dangerous and has some rather unpleasant effects. Not sure whose harder to deal with when under the hallucinating effects of some of the venoms here Axl, Aaron, Zane or Cole. Axl didn’t give us much of a problem well except for Aaron but the rest of us had no problem, Aaron goes a bit crazy and did become a bit nippy. He can bite quite hard but he isn’t made of metal nor do either of them have super strength or powers like those ninja so I guess we’ve had an easier time than the ninja when we have to deal with those affected by these venoms. Lance- I like the golden markings to them but I’m not a fan of these things. Seriously dangerous bird lizards that can figure out how to open doors; I saw one do it. It used it’s jaws to manipulate the handle and open it! That aside that hallucinating effect of their venom and some of the other venoms is hilarious; along with footage of Aaron while he was under a few of these venoms I got footage of Axl and those two ninja Cole and Zane. When we get back to Knightonia I’m posting them on social media despite what they think; everyone will enjoy the laugh and I’ll get such a following…(gets a text message then whispers ‘Clay why’d you have to tell them’) or maybe I’ll hold off posting them until I get their permission. I’d rather not face any of their wraths… Axl and Aaron can be dangerous enough I’d rather not find how dangerous those two ninja can be. Jestro- There are a lot of pretty scary things in this place and these are one of them. Sure in the day when they’re not hunting you I guess they’re not too bad, no worse than you’d expect from something that’s a cross between a reptile and a bird but when you see them at night… as if that glowing effect animals eyes normally have isn’t eerie enough that strange reflective strip they have just makes them creepier. Not to mention that venom, I don’t want to know what it’s like to be hallucinating from it. From what I’ve seen and heard it can be quite scary.

To read the story this is related to you can find it here:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34894561/chapters/86888878

You can also find images pertaining to the story here: https://www.deviantart.com/nerdy-hyena/gallery/72478681/story-project

[morroodle]

Hi pls tell me more about your baby morro au

Like literally any random facts or whatever that you have I need to know moreeee

Also how does he get along with each of the ninja?

Baby morro my son <3 ask and you shall receive.

Relationships with the gang:

When he first arrives morro is very shy and scared, clinging to wus leg. He still has some faint feelings and extremely fuzzy memories leftover from his previous life and it makes him scared of the ninja. The ninja aren't massive fans of him either at the start but with time they warm up and get used to eachother.

Wu: his dad! Love him. Morro is a cuddle bug and loves to hold onto wus tail and yoink his hat.

Zane: intimidated is the easiest way to describe it. Morro has no idea how to interact with him and is usually extra shy and on his best behavior around him, but he relaxes once zane starts cooking. I think zane would eventually offer to teach him and morro would love it

Jay: not too many strong feelings but he is fun to mess with. Jay absolutely tries getting morro into videogames but it dosent work too well.

Cole: Cole has decided to be morros big brother. Morro was intimidated at first cause Cols is big and intimidating but it didn't take long for him to warm up. Cole gives amazing hugs, is very protective (a bit like wu) and absolutely spoils him with sweets.

Kai: so much fun to mess with. Usually the target of Lloyd and morros shenanigans. Morro likes to terrorize him and Kai chasing a giggling morro through the monastery is a common sight.

Nya: scary but SO COOL. Morro respects her and thinks she's an absolute badass (he loves watching her train) but he's got some leftover feelings from his previous life so it takes a while to warm up.

Lloyd: best friend! And enabler. Morro brings out the child in Lloyd and they get up to so many shenanigans together. Are they being safe and following wus rules? Probably not. Is Lloyd a good influence? Probably not. Are they having fun? Absolutely.

A scene I came up with: Morro flies a kite

After morro has been in the monastery for a while wu gives him a gift: his old kite (kinda. it's a new one but looks the same). Morro wants to fly it immediately so they head outside and Cole joins them. Unfortunately for them there is no wind and morro is very disappointed. Wu says they can come back another time but morro refuses and starts to get cranky, yelling that he wants to fly his kite NOW! Suddenly the wind picks up and his kite goes high in the air but it's too strong and the string snaps, sending the kite flying away. Morro starts crying but Cole takes off running after the kite, trying to catch it. Wu takes morro back inside and cut to around 20 minute later when an out of breath and dirty Cole comes back with morros kite in perfect condition. Morro hugs him with no hesitation (and so begins big brother Cole).

Bonus: baby morro doodle because I can (he hates shoes)

[icorro]

I heard its DHX media who's making the anime but they also made equestria girls. Hmmm idk what to think.

[serpentfever]

Rating ninjas based on how tolerant they would be towards serpentine

Kai: 5/10. I blame a lot of Kai’s meanness on his ignorance, to be honest. Though you could probably argue this with all the ninja. Given his comment of thinking the serpentine were just a myth, it doesn’t surprise me that much he’d be scared and hostile towards them, especially when they’re making themselves to be a problem.

Cole: 3/10. Honestly, rewatching s1 it kinda surprised by how much of a disrespectful jerk Cole was towards the serpentine, especially given how often people tend to view him as the heart of the team nowadays. He makes constant mean comments about them, is the one to refer to them as monsters in that first episode of s1, insults their story telling methods (the cave paintings of the Constrictai), and for some reason just struck me as even more hostile than the others.

Zane: 6/10. I do remember Zane making a few distasteful jokes while fighting them, but not that much. And really, especially in the early seasons, a bit of taunting’s to be expected in action shows. It’s also possible Zane was simply following everyone’s lead, blindly trusting everything Wu and the others told him about their enemies. He doesn’t strike me as the kind of person who would judge someone based on their species, but rather their merits.

Jay: 4/10. Slightly better than Cole, but still pretty mean at times. Though given he and his parents both almost turned into snakes, he at least has more of a reason to be a little apprehensive towards them.

Nya: 7/10 I don’t really remember Nya making any insensitive jokes or display any kind of malice outside of the fact that the snakes were their enemies. She also seemed fairly educated about them, but on the other hand, I do have questions about where on earth she found that fangpyre skeleton. Did Nya graverob the bitch??? Though she does get points for being down to kiss Jay while he looks like a snake, that is very promising.

Lloyd: 9/10. I have to give Lloyd points because it was his idea to open the snakes’ tombs to begin with. Lloyd also strikes me as the kind of person who would be drawn to animals most people usually associate as being scary, and by proxy would think the serpentine were pretty cool. And even despite the betrayals, Lloyd never really seems particularly mean towards the serpentine. A real trooper. Lloyd is also a bleeding heart and an empath, and I think he would have a lot of sympathy towards them.

Wu: -10,000/10. This bastard got betrayed by a snake ONCE, over 1,000 years ago, and still holds a grudge. He also played a direct part in sealing them away. “Never trust a snake” more like shut the fuck up.

Garmadon: 0/10. Showed dislike towards the snakes in the comics, and clearly has little respect for them. Like Wu, he also played a part in getting the snakes trapped underground. Problematic fav if I say so myself.

[spinchip]

A/n: rocco sweet moments? kinda, he’s complicated. More OC stuff wooooo

Sunlight slants across rolling blades of grass, warmth and calm spreading across the earth, comfortable heat pooling in Roccos chest where he’s laid out across a bed of clovers. His head is pillowed across Zanes lap and he's got a bottle of apple juice precariously balanced in the crook of his neck so he can drink from his straw without moving, lazily sipping as he allows his eyes to close. It's a risky gamble to fall asleep here, the chance of his drink spilling down his shirt increasing with each passing moment, but he can't bring himself to care about anything other than the fuzzy lull hanging over him.

He loves afternoons like this, with Zane. He loves most things as long as he’s doing it with Zane, but he doesn’t like to acknowledge that. It’s a feeling that’s a lot bigger than he expects, overwhelming and a little scary, and not something to dwell on while a perfect day is just waiting to be enjoyed to the fullest. Rocco kinda wants a cigarette, but Zane had convinced him to quit. He chews on the edge of his straw, and reaches his hand across his chest to touch Zanes knee, just to be closer to him.

A breeze brushes the hair from his forehead, and Rocco ignores the first few times Zane wiggles, assuming he’s trying to find a more comfortable position. Until, that is, Zane lurches to the side so hard he nearly sends Rocco's juice flying down his chest. He barely manages to catch the bottle, eyes snapping open, looking at his boyfriend upside down with his straw still hanging out of his mouth in surprise.

He furrows his brow, trying to make sense of the scene, “What are you doing?” he asks, genuinely baffled.

Zane, who’s got one hand outstretched to the sky and a focused, determined look on his face pauses his apparently crucial task to look down at Rocco, pinning him with those blue doe-eyes apologetically, “I am trying to encourage this butterfly to land on me.” He admits, glancing back up to the colorful little thing.

Rocco, careful not to spill, rolls over onto his stomach and shuffles onto his hands and knees, sitting up to watch the butterfly fly figure eights in the breeze. He looks back over at Zane, he’s watching the display too, his eyes filled with a sort of wonder Rocco had thought himself too mature for. The warmth from before returns full force through no fault of the sun at all, spreading from his heart to the tips of his fingers.

“Here.” He says, taking Zane’s hand and turning it palm up. He tips his bottle over and pours Zane a handful of juice.

Zane makes his non-expression, the one where his eyebrows go flat and his lips relax to a straight line, the one that means I don't think I understand what’s happening and Rocco can’t help but giggle, “Trust me. It’ll like it.” He reassures him. Zane leans forward and thrusts his hand out in offering, and Rocco takes his wrist gently, pulling his hand back to his chest, “Hold it here, and stay still.”

Zane freezes in place at the command, doing his best impression of a statue, and Rocco relaxes back to wait it out and chews absently on his plastic straw. Hopefully the sugar would attract the bug. It lands on Zane quicker than he would have expected, but Zane had always seemed to have an affinity for animals in a way Rocco never had. It’s orange, maybe a monarch? Rocco’s not sure he knows any other type of Butterfly.

Staring down at the tiny animal, Zanes face practically glows, adoration and awe- and then he looks over at Rocco with this expression of happiness and excitement and joy and- and- “I raised a caterpillar once,” He blurts out so he can avoid saying I love you, “All the way into a butterfly, and then I released it.”

Zane glances back to his new friend, watching fondly as it drinks it’s fill and flys away, “You did?” He asks, looking down at his palmful of apple juice. He has no idea what he’s supposed to do with it now, and just settles it against his leg carefully.

“Well, my class did, in first grade or something.” He amends, taking the straw from his mouth and crumpling it up, pocketing it to throw away later, “And I guess my teacher did most of the heavy lifting.”

“I do not think caterpillars weigh that much.” Zane cocks his head, and if Rocco didn’t know Zane as well, he’d have assumed that was a joke.

“I mean that she did all the work, we had a whole bunch in a big net thing. I got to pick one and name it. I can’t remember why we did it, I think it was just something cool?” he hums, mulling it over, shifting to sit criss cross next to Zane. he rests his head against his shoulder absently, fiddling with the now-empty juice container.

“What did you name it?” Zane turns his face and asks the question into the crown of his head.

“Crawly,” He mutters, cheek pillowed against the white of Zane’s long sleeve, “Because when he was a caterpillar he crawled.”

“It’s a good name. Descriptive.” Zane says genuinely, and then he glances down at the apple juice still in his hand. There’s a moment when Rocco can practically hear the gears turning in his head before he holds it up towards him, “Do you want to drink this?”

Rocco laughs, the absurdity of the question getting to him- he claps a hand over his mouth to stifle it as he flops back on the grass to giggle. Zane smiles at the sight, not quite knowing what’s so funny but enjoying Rocco's laugh all the same.

I love you. It’s right there, on the tip of his tongue- he could say it, and if he did he would mean it. He could say you’re beautiful, he could say i’m so happy when i’m with you, he could say you make me want to be better and he’d mean every word. it would be so easy.

Instead he says, “No thanks.” between fits of giggles, and then he leans up and pulls Zane into a short, sweet kiss. When he breaks away he pats his cheek lightly, “Come on, let's go home. I know you want to wash your hands.”

Zane kisses him in return, smiling and pleased and a bit flustered, “I really do.”

[calpalsworld]

Not "autistic anon," but also autistic, (being called maybe ableist made me want to put this out there before go to bed) i thought Zane was depicted that way purposefully by the writers. He has stereotypical traits like taking things literally, and has an actual humor switch. The writers have done things with Zane before like have him lose bodily autonomy (during that one Wu's teas short) and did something with his voice be it making him unable to be understood or talking too loud and the forced pirate voice by Jay. (what you're doing isn't too different from that, right?) I thought it was just a little iffy to distort his body and memory bc that could be interpreted as something not that I'm sure what exactly, it's some kind of disability. I dunno. I'm not good with putting this to words. I hope this makes sense.

Sorry I went to bed but now I’m awake 😭

Also I ended up totally spilling all my thoughts here rather than only specifically replying to you please forgive me context: my scary zane concept design, & my ninjago rewrite i refer to a lot 

Im a little confused but I think I get what you're saying? You're saying the Ninjago writers absolutely DON'T write Zane well (you listed examples of this) and you don't want me to fall into the same trap?

I had the opposite logic earlier. I thought: If Ninjago writers made Zane have stereotypical autisitic traits while also being a dehumanized robot, I may as well embrace it, say he is autistic blatantly, while also making him do funny/cool non-human robot things, so its clear as possible the two aspects of his character are literal and separate and not a metaphor for each other. But you're right! I do have a choice and I dont have to embrace things! :)

Like there were a couple ways I was gonna reject the original, for example, I never wanted Zane to have a funny switch, and I hated how other characters could fuck with Zane and he didn't even care 😬. I want to change that stuff. So youre right, if I am changing shit like that, it would be counterproductive for ME to GIVE him MORE traits along that theme. 😬😬😬 I should try to feel less obligated to portray Zane like he originally is. I still like the concept of "scary zane" (for reasons i explain below the cut) but I might tone it down a bit like with the claws and weird proportions and shit. I’d def make him look more skeletal and undead. That was my original intention, but i didnt execute it as good as I could have.... idk if anyone could tell thats what he was supposed to be like...my bad! But rn I dont wanna redesign him I wanna draw other stuff like normal alive Zane. Sorry LMAO 😳. Like I said in some earlier asks I think, I think Im gonna focus rn on how I should portray season 1 normal not dead Zane so thank you and feel free to share any other Zane thoughts ^_^ SOME OTHER THOUGHTS:

Also I Wanna Argue Some Stuff But I Understand its a Weak Argument Since All of This Context was Just In My Brain (so don't take this as an argument, just as me rambling): I don't want messed up things to happen to Zane and for it to just be ignored. I think if Zane is going to have fucked up things happen to him, as all characters must, its best for it to happen during a season where he actually addresses his feelings about being a robot (learning to accept that he will always be himself, regardless if hes "human" or the "original" or whatever. (thats how I always interpreted his emotions)). But I wouldn't have the other Ninja be very phased by Zane's looks because the whole point is they already love who he is (seasons 1-3 were about getting to know Zane) and now Zane himself just has to learn the physical, robot part of him is okay. Its about person-hood rather than humanity. Because the season focuses around Zane's soul, and because he lost his original body, I feel like I could mess around with his current, temporary body and have fun and make it scary. Because that body should be irrelevant. I understand it possibly being upsetting for an autistic character to be designed like this, but other people I talked to see it the opposite way. They find it comforting for him to look so different but still be himself and be so loved. SO IM ABSOLUTELY NOT saying its wrong to be bothered or to hate it or to feel any way. Just that I personally think it would be cool for Zane to be portrayed with a little spice lol, so thats why I like scary Zane for season 4.

Another Thing I Wannna Say But Is REALLY Hypocritical: (this isnt directed at anyone I just REALLY want to say this) I know I say "this is Zane but scary, he looks like fnaf" so he's obviously dehumanized, but I always felt like "scary" is more of an objective fact. Its an instinct. But what's "not human" is subjective. I think there is a problem with saying anything different from "average" human is dehumanized because that could extend to real people. Lol I know its bad for me to compare FNAF-ass Zane to real people, but I mean he could be real. People can have exposed teeth, and people can be shaped weird. And when someone first sees a person who looks like that they'll probably think "woah those features are scary" by instinct. And that surprise doesn't make someone ableist obviously. But bring that person’s humanity into question is NOT an instinct, and is fucked to shit. This is kinda a bad point for me to make since its about the fictional FNAF Zane I drew, and I am NOT implying ANYONE was thinking like this. [especially not the original asker anon who I am totally forgetting about at this point OOPS]. But I just thought it was an opinion of mine I couldn't go without mentioning when talking about dehumanization and disabilities.

^^^ I think you (anon) understand what I mean and might’ve said the exact same thing as me if you were writing a long ass response? I think this because you started to bring physical disabilities up and you said it was "a little iffy." ^_^ So we agree, but I don't see Zane's relation to real life disabilities as "a little iffy" I see it more like "complicated"? IF THAT DIFFERENCE EVEN MAKES ANY SENSE?????? I feel like a lot of things about Zane are really just complicated and need the right context, rather than the concepts necessarily being wrong -- NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT! THATS THE WHOLE REASON I DO THIS STUPID REWRITE! XD thats why a lot of my rewrite SO FAR has been the same concepts and plot beats, but different dialogue n specifics and such. I like a lot of concepts in Ninjago but I dont think they were presented correctly.....! :( So I guess all we can do is wait and see if I make Zane offensive or not....???

Also something about the memory part - yeah i agree i was surprised no one thought that was weird to make jokes out of his memory issues..... BUT I am like 100% firm on making his memory take longer to come back because I think its stupid how quick Zane was able to recover from literally dying. Like its just dumb to me. Hate it. (also bc memory & soul mechanics is ummm kinda important in my rewrite.... for reasons). Another memory thing btw, I was going to make his original amnesia come from hitting his head in an attack against the Skulkin when they stole his dads corpse, rather than his dad fucking choosing to make him forget. (its a sweet & iconic scene, but Um, WHY?!!!?!?!?!?) He has to follow data recovery instructions he finds in his dads diary. I think in that context it makes moments of memory loss somewhat different for Zane's character? Instead of loss of autonomy associated with disability, its a literal violent loss of autonomy associated with being traumatized by physical force. Idk how to phrase it exactly but I think that makes some vibes different?

Sorry, I think I got really distracted, and I don't know if I responded well to your points. Because uhhhh I think I agree with your stance actually? If I understand correctly? Fuck Ninjago writers for making the robot lose autonomy (a stereotypical robot theme) while also making him seem clearly autistic (NOT A HAPPY THEME FOR AUTISTIC PEOPLE) and not addressing it. And also auuugh Zane with a weird body is a difficult topic - kinda sussy pretty iffy.

Lol anyway idk if this made any sense and I REALLY rambled on you. but this was nice 👉👈 more Zane criticism pls love you and i love zane. i hope u dont feel mad at me because then it would be weird that im saying that lol. if you do feel mad at me tho you can send another ask (ILL TRY TO JUST LISTEN NOT RAMBLE NEXT TIME) but assuming ur chill rn, love you thnx

Take this page, don’t mind cole’s ass.

[sketch--booked]

what are your thoughts on canon ninjago ships? (including Conya and Wusako, just for funsies)

bro okay,, watch me struggle to even remember the canon ships ghghg. Being straight in the ninjago fandom? what’s that never heard of it ghghgh I jest.

Conya,, never did see it, tbh never did see Jay with Nya either but after season 6 I'm okay with Jaya. I don’t mind Conya, I’ll deal with em. But if an assassin was gonna kill me and I had to choose one of them, I’d chose Jaya. (tho there is a point where I don’t like any shipping with Nya or Lloyd, simply because she is a solid few years younger than them in my mind’s eye and hhhh not okay with that bit ghghghghg, don’t like that age gap no no no--)

Wusako,, Is just kinda weird in my brain? simply because I look at it from Lloyd’s perspective. I just see it as “My uncle is getting frisky with my ex-widowed mother,,” Not the biggest fan but I’ll deal. tbh love triangles or general relationships are hard for me to read an stuff, it’s proabably actually nothing like that in the show ghghgh but it’s just what I s e e.

I stan Pixane just because in the show, they do actually have multiple moments where their relationship is broadened and I just kinda wish we got a bit more of that for the other canon relationships which is kinda why I’m looking forward to seasons 14 and 15,, that and cocky Zane and an entire Nya seasonghghghg

I wanna talk about Kailor, canon or not idk which it is. Kailor is cool, simply because I like Skylor’s character so damn much and I know for a fact that Skylor would be the scary one in the relationship. As much as Kai tries to be the big man, Skylor is the one that defends him when people grab his ass.

.

I really can’t remeber anything else??? I’m not a shipping person in all honesty I just vibe around it. I don’t hate shipping, don’t get me wrong, ship whatever I’m just not very active in that part of the comunity ghghgh

(I apologise if my oppinions suck ghghg I don’t do this kinda stuff)

[greenygreenland]

Having Morro as your boyfriend:

-when he fell for you, he fell h a r d

-he may look tough and mean, but he's actually a real softie because he's just a teenager

-acts all emo/cool because he wasn't the happiest guy growing up

-you change that because he learns to find joy in life again

-he's awkward at love-related-stuff because all he ever knew was the way of the ninja

-if you met him when he possessed lloyd, then there's no doubt that you held a grudge against him

-that changed when you realised he had corrupted himself over the idea of becoming the 'chosen one'/green ninja

-you begin to forgive him after he redeems himself

-you save him from dying because yeah, you kinda like him and hate to see him go

scratch that--you love him

-he's not the cuddly type at first and is kinds shy at public affection even if it's hand holding

-baby steps baby steps

-your relationship = difficult at first because he's a ghost

-you learn to get used to it

-morro lowkey sad he can't physically hold you/hug or kiss like a human could

-he wishes he could be a regular human again

-kinda insecure about that and fears that you'll leave him for a man who could offer what he couldn't

-you give him a long talk and spend each day showing him how much you love him and why he's so special to you

-"morro, i would never leave you because you stole my heart"

-he'd laugh a little and say with a small smirk, "did i now?"

-you'd grin at him and give him a tight hug

-he's a gentle kisser despite his tough exterior and he'd be the quiet romantic

-so he wouldn't like to bring you to public places or fancy restaurants

-he prefers long walks, star gazing, long talks under the moonlight, movie night on the couch, or anything that's not too loud

-lowkey a great flirt despite thinking he's too awkward/inexperienced

-"are you a star because you make all my dreams come true"

-you'd probably be blushy if you're shy

-if not, i bet you'd tease him back or begin a flirting contest

-would do anything for you even if it meant leaving the land of the living to let you live another day

-if someone bothers you he'd probably threaten them

-if you don't like that kind if stuff he'd just glare at them until they cower away and run for the hills

-watching a scary movie with him is like watching cinema sins because he criticizes the whole movie

-"fake"

-"makeup"

-"so fake"

-"that's not even what a ghost looks like!"

-if you get scared he'd wrap his arms tight around you and let you lean into his shoulder

-"it's not real, don't be scared"

-"your boyfriend is a literal ghost you have nothing to fear"

-cuddles after the movie to offer you comfort if scared

-would be the type of guy to put his arm round your shoulders and let you lean into his side

-the ninja disapprove of him at first

-especially kai + lloyd

-nya would just be cautious while zane wouldn't be too happy about it

-cole would thinn you're crazy while wu would give morro a 'talk'

-jay would keep a careful eye on morro

-lloyd would freak at first

"You're dating the guy that possessed and almost killed all of us? Are you nuts?"

-"fear isn't a word where i come from...?"

-"don't give me a starfarer quote. This is serious (y/n). What if he hurts you?"

-"he won't. I just know it."

-you have such strong faith in him that lloyd decides to be like elsa and let it go (but he keeps an eye on morro)

-they later find out how much he loves you when he protects you from some thugs in the street

-"are you okay? Are you hurt (y/n)?"

-"i'm fine. You?"

-he would smirk at you and give you a big, firm kiss on the lips

-"not a stratch"

-the ninja learn to respect and trust him because they see how much you both love each other

-morro spoils you with little gifts here and there or by giving you a breakfast in bed

-he goes to wu for advice on relationships because he's still kinda i n s e c u r e

-"i can't say i know much about that, but i know the best thing to do is to be yourself. It's less complicated. And if (y/n) loves you as much as you do her, then she will not have a reason to leave you."

-takes his advice and applies it to the t

-turns out the old man is right

-you both would do anything for each other, even if it meant walking to the ends of the earth and back

-morro = defintion of i love you to the moon and back

-you guys = perfect power couple/soulmates

[coleisunderrated]

Silence

I feel like going back to my old ideas including the nindroid!Jay stuff so here’s a little something I wrote starring Nya and Skylor cuz the girls of Ninjago need more love.

There are times Nya just wants to get away from it all. That could explain why she was at Chen’s Noodle House, soon to be renamed Skylor’s Noodle House. The Master of Amber’s current occupation was a far cry from being her evil father’s ruthless tool but it’s understandable she’d want a more peaceful lifestyle after all that. For now, she seems content, making a living out of something she truly enjoys and surrounding herself with people who actually care about her. Maybe that’s why Nya came here to escape all the drama that’s been going on.

The newly appointed water ninja watched the raindrops clinging to the window. She observed each drop running down the glass in some sort of chaotic race to the bottom. She pondered on the possibility that she was controlling their direction and speed. She still doesn’t know how to feel about all this. Her element was something passed down to her from her bloodline but as Samurai X...

Samurai X was something she made entirely from scratch. It was her own identity she crafted out of her own hands. Samurai X was a title and power she earned, not handed to her like being the water ninja. It doesn’t feel right. How could Sensei Wu and even the other ninja expect her to abandon something she had so much heart and passion on to become something she never planned to be in an instant? Shouldn’t she have her own say in this? Do they even respect her decisions?

She was only slightly aware of the Master of Amber saying something to her.

“Nya?” Skylor’s voice finally reached Nya’s sense of awareness.

“W-what...?” The former samurai’s mind returned to the real world.

“Would you like to order something? Don’t worry, it’s on the house.” Skylor offered.

“I’ll just have some iced tea.”

After preparing the cool beverage, the redhead sat across the table occupied by the new ninja. The silence was threatening to suffocate her. There’s probably a whole lot of stuff she and Nya could talk about.

“How's Jay doing?” Skylor blurted out the first topic in mind.

“He’s... still getting used to his new body...”

Skylor simply stared at the water ninja, not expecting any response. She can tell it’s a really difficult subject and she mentally kicked herself for bringing so impulsive. Before she can stop Nya, she resumed speaking of matters regarding the lightning ninja’s situation.

“Pixal and I are making a special suit for Jay. It’s infused with Volt Ore so his body won’t react when he uses his powers. It’s actually kinda scary... being hurt by your own element...”

“And what’s Pixal up to these days?” Skylor quickly changed the subject.

“She’s very concerned for Zane and Jay though I don’t blame her. Besides that, she’s been acting strange lately. She keeps asking people if they need anything more than she usually does and I saw her the other day looking at some info on swordsmanship. Cyrus Borg never really programmed any ‘pro’ combat skills in her and even when she shared Zane’s powers, she never used any weapons. I think she had this strange-looking blade when she was controlled by the Overlord. Then again, she wasn’t herself so I don’t know if she’s any good or not. I’m not trying to put her down or anything...”

“And how are things between you and Jay?”

“We’ve become... distant,” Nya sighed, “It’s not just because Jay’s a nindroid now. Over the last couple of years, we’ve been spending less time together. It’s like the moments we’ve shared together have lost their magic. And after the ninja went to the Tomb of the First Spinjitzu Master, he’s been... I don’t know... secretive. It’s more like... there’s something he’s wants to tell me but he can’t seem to spit it out. It’s like he’s hiding something from me. Maybe we just weren’t meant to be...”

‘Dammit, I came here to forget about all that stuff, not yammer on about it!’ The former samurai felt her head pound painfully. Luckily, Skylor sensed this was stressing Nya out. She wanted to make friends now and all she did was make the water ninja uncomfortable. There’s no way she’ll ever go back to the way she was, when she let her father rule over her.

“Don’t get so worked up. It’s my fault for badgering you in the first place,” Skylor placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder, “Let me make it up to you. I’ll whip up your favorite foods for free, okay?”

“I-it’s fine, really. I should get going.” Nya abruptly got up and headed back to the Destiny’s Bounty.

The restaurant was silent once again and never felt so empty. Skylor glanced at the drink Nya discarded. It was still full.

[lloydskywalkers]

terrorize y’all’s neighborhood

I can’t write short fics, you guys. I tried. 

Anyways, I know DOTD is the canon Ninjago-Halloween-equivalent thing, but I wanted to write about the ninja having a normal holiday, because in what world would Lloyd not love an opportunity to dress up and eat all the candy he wants?

(And the title is completely stolen from Thriller. Completely.)

Hope you guys are having a great holiday!

"Kai."

"Kai, look."

Kai rolls his eyes, glancing skyward briefly before turning.

Sure enough, Lloyd is holding a bloodied, rubber eyeball up to his own tightly closed one, his face screwed up in a grotesque expression. "Agh, my eye fell out!"

Kai leans one arm against the shopping cart, the other on his hip. "What did I tell you about picking stuff up we aren't gonna buy?" he says, even as he suppresses a snort.

Lloyd's expression falls, and he sticks his tongue out at him. "You're not fun," he grouses.

"I'm lots of fun," Kai says. "I'm just trying not to raise the Green Ninja to be a corrupt child criminal who steals bloody eyeballs from Walmart."

"I'm not stealing," Lloyd protests. "Look, I got it from the Halloween section, it's right there!"

Kai looks up and realizes that he has, indeed, made the crucial error of wandering into the Halloween section with Lloyd in tow, when they're only supposed to be getting a few groceries.

"Oops," he mutters.

"Oooh, look at all the fake blood they have…"

Kai quickly makes to drag Lloyd away before he's forever swallowed by aisles of plastic skeletons and cheap ghoul masks. "C'mon, bud, we've still gotta get stuff for meals," he says, as he tugs a reluctant Lloyd toward the food aisles. "We can't all eat rubber eyeballs for dinner."

"Aw, but they have so much cool stuff," Lloyd pouts, watching the Halloween aisle disappear forlornly. "What's the point of Halloween if you guys aren't even gonna let me celebrate it?"

Kai is only half-listening what Lloyd is saying, too intent on the scrawled shopping list he's got in his hand. He brings it closer to his face, squinting. Why do they keep letting Nya write the shopping lists? Her hand-writing is terrible, they should just appoint Zane as secretary from now on.

"-and that's why Halloween is clearly the best holiday in the entire world," Lloyd is still rattling on. "It's way better than those other dumb holidays, kris-ness, or whatever-"

"You mean Christmas?" Kai gapes at him. He shakes his head. "Boy, we're gonna have to change your mind on that one…"

Lloyd shakes his head. "Halloween is definitely the best, because you get to dress up and scare people, but most importantly you get-" He stops abruptly, eyes going wide as Kai desperately tries to drag them to the next aisle.

"Candy, Kai, can we stop, please, please please-"

"Lloyd, I told you, we're only here for groceries."

Lloyd groans, hanging off the shopping cart as Kai struggles to push it forward, kicking at Lloyd with his leg. "Just some of the mini snickers bars? The ones with little ghosts on them?"

"Lloyd-"

"I'll die without them."

"You've been hanging out with Jay too much," Kai huffs, dragging Lloyd up by his arm. "Look, if you're good, maybe I'll buy you a candy bar at the check-out."

Lloyd brightens immediately at that. "Okay!" He says. "What's next? Do we need cereal? 'Cause the cereal's right here. Can we get Froot Loops?"

Kai rolls his eyes, but he can't help but grin at Lloyd's enthusiasm as he practically tears down the aisle, the sleeves of Jay's old hoodie (that's still way too large for him) flopping over his hands again as he does.

The grin slides off his face as Kai glances back down at the shopping list, highly conscious of the tiny numbers Nya's scrawled at the bottom of the page. Those are painfully legible. He drags a hand over his face. They're not scrapped for money, per say, but after everything - the loss of basically all their belongings on the Bounty to the Devourer, the cost of keeping up with rent - they really do need to be keeping an eye on things, financially. They aren't terrible, but it reminds Kai uncannily of the days he spent struggling to support himself and Nya on the blacksmith shop.

It also means he can't buy Lloyd anything he wants - not even cheap little bloody eyeballs.

Kai glances over the list again, chewing on the inside of his cheek. They can't not get ibuprofen, that's a big no-go. Basic medical supplies are a must, obviously, and he can't skimp on the milk or Zane'll kill him. They could maybe skip the anxiety meds this time, but then Kai would feel awful if anyone had trouble-

"What's wrong?" Lloyd says, craning his head over Kai's arm. "Do we not have enough money? Do you owe some to somebody? Are we in trouble with the mob?"

"Are we - what?" Kai blinks. "The mob - no, Lloyd, geez. How do you even know about that?"

"Gene had an uncle in it! He said they would go yank people off the street, then they would like, steal their kidneys an' stuff if they couldn't pay you back," Lloyd says, gleefully.

Kai stares at him, mentally despairing. He finally decides to let this particular one go. "No, Lloyd," he sighs, wearily. "We're not in trouble with the mob. We're just…a little tight on stuff, right now."

Kai winces. How is he supposed to explain their financial woes to a kid? "Sorry kiddo, we probably won't be able to get those snickers today."

"It's okay," Lloyd says, with surprising nonchalance. "I know we're not super rich or anything. Stuff cost a lot. Before I was with you guys, back when I was on my own, I would try to buy food and stuff, sometimes? But it cost so much. Who even has that much money, anyways?"

Kai winces even harder, feeling the same frustrating mix of pained anger he does whenever Lloyd brings up his childhood thus far.

"-anyways, the point is, I totally get why people become bank robbers, because imagine if you had that much money, you could buy, like, so much candy-!"

"And that's our cue to check out," Kai says, a hand on Lloyd's back as he ushers him past the employee eyeing them suspiciously. "Didn't I say we were trying not to turn you into a corrupt child criminal?" he hisses.

"It was just a joke! You're never fun, geez-"

They get through the check-out line mercifully quick, and Kai's total ends up being slightly under budget, so he caves and buys them a snickers bar to split. Lloyd is seemingly pacified, so Kai decides it's a good time to bring something back up.

"Anyways, back to the whole 'we're tyrants who won't let you celebrate Halloween' thing," Kai says, as they pile the now-bagged groceries back into the shopping cart. "Where'd you get that idea? We're obviously going to celebrate. You can even go trick-or-treating with the other kids in Ninjago City, if you want. Or we can hit up Jamanaki, or Cole's hometown, I guess."

Whatever place is safest at the moment, Kai decides, as they head out of the store.

Lloyd, to his surprise, doesn't exactly look thrilled with that idea. "I dunno," he says, dully. "I don't really wanna hang out with the other kids. Can we just watch scary movies at the apartment?"

"What's wrong with the other kids?" Kai says, frowning. Lloyd isn't usually shy - maybe a little quiet around new people, but he's definitely not one to shy away from any opportunity to get candy, regardless of who's around.

Lloyd shrugs, looking down as he toes a scuff on the linoleum floor. "There's nothing wrong with them," he mutters. "It's more kinda...me."

Kai blinks, coming to a halt. "What?"

Lloyd gives a jerky little shrug. He grins up at him, a toothy one that shows his slightly too-sharp teeth, his red eyes flashing. "'Cause I'm the spawn of evil, duh, they all fear me!"

He says it brightly, still grinning fiercely, but Kai catches the slight waver in his voice, the fake edge in his smile.

Oh. Kai's heart twists.

He opens his mouth to give a rebuttal, fully prepared to insist to Lloyd that nobody even notices those things - and stops. Kai hesitates, thinking back to their trip in the store so far. You'd think, living in a place where literal snake people ran around constantly, red eyes wouldn't draw much attention. But living in a place where Garmadon is relatively well-known…

There'd been that shopper passing by who had done a double-take at Lloyd, her eyes quickly skirting away from his. Kai had shot her a death glare, and Lloyd thankfully hadn't noticed, but…still.

Kai's jaw tightens, and he feels about ready to bare his own teeth.

"You just…you just gotta show 'em it's nothing," he opts instead, trying to sound encouraging. Cole is usually much better at this positivity stuff. Or Zane. Or Jay, really, just anyone other than Kai. "Just be yourself," he finally says. "Once they actually meet you, they'll like you, no sweat."

"Just be yourself? What kind of stupid advice is that?" Lloyd glares. "You didn't even like me when you met me."

"Wha- that's not true," Kai says, frowning. "I-"

"You guys hung me from a roof!"

Kai cringes. "Ah, yeah…um….look, in hindsight, that was super uncool-"

"And then you all hated me for like, a month, until you found out I was the Green Ninja-"

"Hey, woah, now that's not true," Kai says, grabbing Lloyd's shoulders firmly, forcing him to look at him. "We definitely liked you before then, and you know it. But c'mon, Lloyd - you acted like a total brat, you know that, right?"

Lloyd huffs, but he nods, looking sour. "Yeah, yeah," he mutters. His expression falls a bit. "But…you guys are different. No one else has ever liked me. All the kids at Darkley's hated my guts."

Kai is dying, just a bit, on the inside. Like the I-Need-To-Light-Someone-On-Fire-For-This kind of dying, the kind where he goes out and does something stupid-

"Except for maybe Brad," Lloyd mutters, hand on his chin. "I think he sorta liked me, a little bit…"

Kai finally cuts in, his voice only mildly venomous. "Well, the kids at Darkley's were all little assholes-"

"Nya says you're not supposed to use that word," Lloyd says, suddenly very serious. He'd taken his "language learned at Darkley's is not acceptable language if you want dessert tonight" lecture very seriously, it appears.

Kai huffs. "Okay, those little jerks - they don't know what they're talking about. They're a bunch of brainless rock heads."

Lloyd gives a slightly happier giggle at that. "Like Cole?"

Kai gives him a side eye. "Be nice."

"Cole is way cooler than anyone at Darkley's, anyways," Lloyd amends.

"How about this," Kai says. "We all go trick-or-treating together, so if anyone decides to mess with you, I light them on fire."

Lloyd lights up brighter than the flashing electronic pumpkins next to them, and Kai mentally congratulates himself.

"For real?" Lloyd says. "You'll dress up and everything?"

"Cross my heart," Kai draws an x across his chest. "Now hop on," he says, patting the shopping cart handle. "I'll run and push us across the parking lot."

Lloyd whoops, hopping up on the cart.

"Okay," he says, as Kai puts one foot up. "I lied. You're sometimes fun."

"Oh, just sometimes, huh," Kai grins.

"On weekends, and holidays, and-"

Kai never does learn when else he's fun, because Lloyd is too busy laughing as they careen down the parking lot, shopping cart rattling loudly in their wake.

******

Nya thinks them all trick-or-treating a great idea, and she claims that she can make fake blood all on her own - so by the time Zane agrees with her, nobody stands a snowball's chance in hell of saying no to that particular team-up of puppy eyes.

Cole tries arguing that they don't have costumes, until Jay wickedly reminds him that they've still got the pirate outfits from the whole thing with Captain Soto and his men - but by that point, Cole isn't resisting much anyways. Lloyd's excitement is infectious, and it's fun to celebrate holidays with a family this big.

It's something none of them are quite used to, but it's welcome nonetheless.

"We're only sticking to this neighborhood, okay?" Cole tells them, for the hundredth time. "It'll gonna be crowded enough that I doubt anyone will notice it's us, and they're running a haunted house in the middle, so-"

"A haunted house?" Lloyd says, looking up from where he's finishing off the blood splatters on his own costume. "Can I take back what I said about Ninjago City being lame? This is awesome."

Lloyd, economically, has decided to as a ghost, which only requires Nya's old bedsheet, eyeholes, and a good deal of homemade fake blood splattered over it.

"I've gotta be a scary ghost," Lloyd tells Jay, seriously. "The more blood, the better."

"You got it, kid," Jay says, who's getting pretty liberal with the blood himself.

"You're a pirate, Jay, not a zombie," Zane says, ducking the drops of red paint that go flying.

"A zombie pirate," Kai offers.

"A zirate," Jay grins. Cole groans.

Nya's the last to dress up, and she's ended up going as a vampire, to Lloyd's eternal delight.

"You look like me!" he says excitedly, as Nya gives him a sharp-toothed grin.

"Yup," she says, running her tongue over the plastic fangs and making a face. "They feel kinda weird, because they're just lame fakes, but they look super cool, right?"

Lloyd's own fangs (which is a generous term) are tiny in comparison, of course, so they really look absolutely nothing like each other, but the megawatt grin he's got on - Nya's playing the long game here, and Kai has to respect her for that.

This means he's gotta get those snickers bars with the little ghosts on them later, though.

******

Trick-or-treating ends up being a lot more fun than Kai had been expecting - then again, he's never really been himself that he can remember, so maybe it's a new experience for all of them.

Well, except Jay and Cole. They're both far too invested in making sure they hit every single house possible.

Kai grins as he watches them head back from their latest house - Lloyd makes the cutest little terror of a ghost he's ever seen, swamped in the sheet as he is. Albeit a very bloody ghost, fake blood dripped gruesomely all over him. But he seems happy enough, flapping his sheet-covered arms around at anyone who dares get near them.

Well, he had been. Lloyd had discovered, much to his dismay, that it's almost impossible to eat candy with a sheet draped over his face - though there were an amusing few minutes where he had tried vainly to shove several Starbursts through the eyeholes at once. He's finally given up and shoved the sheet back over his head, where it drapes over him like a very bloody cape as he surveys his bag of candy. He's beaten them all by a ridiculously large margin, but that's just because they're all suckers who are slipping half their own candy into his bag the entire night.

"Hey, you got any chocolate you wanna share?" Cole says, reaching his hand toward Lloyd's bag.

Lloyd opens his mouth and snaps his teeth together. "I'll bite you," he threatens. "Like a shark."

"Ooh, Lloyd the Fangfish," Cole pretends to shudder. "Watch out, he's got rabies."

"I do not," Lloyd huffs, but he grudgingly hands Cole one of his Kit-Kats.

"Don't eat too much in one go," Zane reminds him. "You don't want to make yourself sick."

"Aw, c'mon Zane, it's Halloween," Jay says, through a mouthful of his own candy. "Lighten up."

"Hey, Zane can't help being such a mom," Kai says, slinging his arm around him. Zane shrugs at him good-naturedly, not hard enough to actually shake him off. "One of us has to be."

Zane rolls his eyes long-sufferingly. The moon dips behind a cluster of clouds, darkening the streets a bit, and Kai's about to suggest they head home - when a voice echoes across the street.

"Lloyd - hey, Lloyd!"

Lloyd's head snaps up. "Brad?" he says, almost incredulously, as the boy runs up to them, tugging on the hood of his own costume.

Kai stiffens, and he's distinctly aware of Nya giving the kid the stink-eye where she stands off to the side. Sure, Lloyd kind-of made-up with his friends after they lured them all to Darkley's and tried to re-evil-brainwash him, but years of being demon brats don't just go away (look at Lloyd). That, and Lloyd's words from earlier are still pretty fresh in his mind.

Kai narrows his own eyes. Lloyd can handle himself against one little tyke, but just in case…Kai isn't too opposed to shoving some kids in a trash can tonight.

Lloyd and Brad have gone quiet, carefully eyeing each other. Kai holds his breath as they size each other up. Brad was the one Lloyd said might have liked him, right? Maybe this can work in his favor, then. If Lloyd can just be chill for five seconds, then maybe-

"Your fake blood is lame," Lloyd finally says. Nya smacks a hand against her head.

Apparently, it's the right thing to say when you're an ex-evil hellion of a kid, though, because Brad immediately relaxes, jutting his lip out in a half-pouting scowl.

"Is not. Where'd you get yours, anyways?" He gives the ninja a wide-eyed glance. "Did you get it from somebody they killed?" he whispers.

Zane sputters as Cole claps a hand over his mouth, holding back snickers. Lloyd rolls his eyes.

"Nah, they'd never actually kill somebody. They're good guys, remember? Nya - that's Nya, by the way! - she made it."

"Cool," Brad says, looking a little less nervous. "Hey, Gene's over at the playground - wanna help scare him? We still owe him for the fake spider thing, right?"

"Oh - uh, yeah, obviously," Lloyd says, and Kai almost snorts at the gleam in his eye. Gee, you spend all this time trying to reform a kid.

The two fall into easy conversation - mostly plotting an unfortunate Gene's demise - as if they'd never been strained at all, and Kai watches as Lloyd runs off with him to the other kids, feeling a little abandoned and a lot protective.

"Just one little hair," he says to Nya. "I'll just singe one off."

"Kai, he's his friend, look," Nya sighs, gesturing at Lloyd and Brad where they're now tearing around the playground with several other kids (who are, no doubt, equal hellions). "They're just having fun."

"Yeah, well, I don't trust 'em."

"Well, Lloyd can always blast them across town with an energy burst, if they give him any trouble," Jay says, tossing a chocolate bar at Cole.

Zane frowns at him. "That's…not exactly the use of power we should be teaching him."

"What, you don't want Lloyd to protect himself from bullies?"

Zane considers the point. "Perhaps, if the situation called for it…"

"Great!" Jay stands up, linking his arm with Zane. "Then who's up for the haunted house with me?"

Cole takes a step back. "Nuh-uh, you know how I am with creepy houses. I don't do that kind of stuff-"

"You do with us!" Nya says cheerfully, grabbing one arm while Kai wrestles the other. Cole sputters indignantly as they drag him along. "Come on, let's see if Lloyd and his little demon gang wanna join."

******

"Welp!" Jay throws the door open with unnecessary dramatics as they pile back into the apartment. "We're banned for life. I hope you guys are happy."

"Hey, I wasn't the one who drop-kicked the chainsaw actor," Kai mutters.

Cole flushes. "I'm a ninja, I can't help it - it was reflex!""

"Was the high-pitched screaming reflex?" Jay says. Cole elbows him in the gut, and Jay snatches the candy bar from his hand in retaliation. Cole gives an indignant yelp.

"Hey! That was my last chocolate bar!"

Nya roll her eyes as she squeezes past Jay, who's loudly chewing Cole's candy bar in his face. Lloyd totters in behind her, half-buried in the pile of candy he's amassed in his bag. He's giggling manically, and the look in his eyes is genuinely more terrifying than anything Kai's ever seen.

"Pace yourself on that candy, alright?" Kai says, eyeing him. "I don't wanna wake up to you puking your guts out tonight."

"Nuh-uh," Lloyd says, through a mouthful of taffy. "I don' ge' sick from candy. S'impossible."

"That's what you said the last time," Cole says, snatching the bag from Lloyd's hand and ignoring his cry of displeasure. "That's enough for tonight. You can eat yourself sick again in the morning."

Nya strides by them, falling onto the couch next to Kai with a a thwump. Kai watches in amusement as she rubs a hand across her eye, smearing mascara and eyeliner across her cheek in a raccoon-like smudge. Nya notices his stare, glancing at her hand and huffing.

"Remind me not to wear costume makeup again," she mutters, as Kai snorts. "At least I didn't ruin it for the picture."

She digs into her bag, pulling out a slightly-rumpled but still glossy photograph.

"Not that it matters," Nya continues. "This is the worst picture of us I've ever seen." She makes a face, staring at the picture the workers at the haunted house had snapped of them before they went in.

Kai shifts on the couch so he's looking over Nya's shoulder, squinting at the photo. "Is that supposed to be Zane?" he says, pointing at the blurry figure on the right.

"May…be?" Nya says. "At least you turned out alright."

Kai grins at where he's taking up half the picture, Lloyd wrapped in a chokehold around his neck that could be considered a hug if generous, both of them grinning wildly.

"Someone's gotta bring the beautiful," Kai says. He looks up to where Lloyd is being accosted by Cole, having somehow gotten his hands on yet another chocolate bar.

"Lloyd, I said that's enough. Lloyd, don't - no! Stop!"

Lloyd's hand stills, the chocolate bar hovering inches from his mouth.

"Put it down," Cole hisses. The chocolate bar moves half an inch closer. "Lloyd! No!"

Lloyd shoves the chocolate in his mouth before Cole can blink. "Lloyd!"

Lloyd springs from the chair, cackling wildly as he runs. Cole tears after him, seething. "I'll use you as a toothbrush for the Ultradragon, you pint-sized punk-"

"I'm surprised Sensei Wu hasn't come in and killed us yet," Jay says, flopping down on the rug below Kai and Nya, fumbling with the remote.

"He went out for the evening," Zane says. "Which means you can scream as loudly as you want over the movie."

Jay chucks a wrapper at Zane's head. He snatches it easily, tossing it back at Jay. Their worn TV finally flickers to life just as Cole and Lloyd finally wind down, Lloyd looking a lot less gleeful with his decision.

"O-oh, too much candy," Lloyd moans, clambering onto the couch next to Kai.

"You puke on me, I'm tossing you off the roof," Kai says, but he wraps an arm around him nonetheless, pulling Lloyd against his side.

"No you won't," Lloyd yawns, eyelids already fluttering as the movie starts. "You'd miss me too much. Wouldn't ever have any fun without me."

"Oh, I wouldn't?"

"Nope. I gotta…keep you from getting boring."

"No worries on that one," Kai says, grinning. He bites back his own yawn, settling further into the couch as Lloyd nods off, curling up against his side. "No worries at all."

Lloyd is soundly asleep against his side in seconds, snoring softly. Kai's getting all sorts of looks from Jay and Cole, but he masterfully ignores them - for now. Nya's taken to nodding off on his other side, so he's kinda sibling-sandwiched at the moment. Upsetting them isn't worth putting Jay in a headlock tonight.

"Here," Nya suddenly whispers over the movie, waving the picture up at him from where she's using his shoulder as a pillow. "Wanna put it in your modeling portfolio?"

Kai maturely sticks his tongue out at her, but he still snatches the picture. "Nah, but I'll keep it as a reminder of what massive dorks you all are."

They settle back to watching the movie, and he glances at the picture again. It's a pretty cute one - not that he's gonna admit that. It's a keeper, at least. They really don't have a lot of pictures of their team, and hardly any at all with Lloyd and his disaster-haired self.

Ah well. He can take more later. They've got plenty of time.

[parachutingkitten]

Season 1 Analysis

STANDARD DISCLAIMER: I am going to be applying the concept of criticism to a TV show you presumably love and adore as much as I do. If you do not want your idea that the show is immaculate to be challanged, I would not advise reading past this point.

Mood for this season: Logic? Nahh...

I'm taking three film classes right now, I only rip it apart because I love it! (Sry, if I seem a little overly critical at times)

So, let's start with some background (you get to learn about me, yay! This is what you came here for. Right?). When the original series (seasons 1 and 2) came out in 2012, my little brother, at the age of six, was THE target audience for lego ninjas that you could battle and spin really really fast. I... am five years older than him. He collected sets, and he even bought me a spinner pack with the "girl character", the "blue one", and one of the skeletons so that I could play with him. To this day they are the only legos I own, but they sit in an altoids tin in my night stand. It was right before our family moved to Germany (we're a military family btw) that our parents purchased the disk episodes of seasons one and two. When you live in Europe, you tend to want to do a LOT of traveling. Every weekend, I kid you not, we went to another country. Which means road trips. And road trips mean movies. I would always let my brother choose what we watched, because he was the one who would get fussy and upset, so we watched a lot of Kung Fu Panda, and Madagascar, and a LOT of Cars (as in plural movies. I quote Cars 2, regularly), but the thing we watched most often was those niniago DVDs. Because you could just auto play those episodes one after another for a seemingly endless movie that would last until you arrived. So, I've seen these episodes a few times. Like, A LOT of times. Drilling these episodes into my mind over and over is what made me obsessed with it later (but we'll talk about that when we get to season 3).

Upon rewatching... they are exactly as I remember. There were no real surprises, so I don't feel like I have too much to say shock value wise, but that doesn't mean I don't have anything to say.

Plot

I've made a joke post about this before, but season one does fall into the treasure hunt formula. Find a fang blade. Lose it. Look for next one. Repeat for the next few episodes. Same thing can be said for the true potential. Find what holds them back emotionally, overcome it by the end of the episode to save the person/people you needed to fix your relationship with, glowing orb/pillar to make you certifiably awesome. For four. Episodes. Straight. Even if you space out the episodes where the ninja get their true potential, or when they find the fang blades, it would keep you on your toes a bit more. This being said... it does greatly help to give every episode a PLOT purpose. Every one of those "previously on ninjago" recaps was shoving a bunch of stuff in there. Most ninjago episodes do serve a purpose (except of course the atrocity that is the first half of season two - we WILL get to that next time) at least character development wise, but it is nice to have meaningful plot development too and keep a consistent pace throughout the season. This season certainly keeps up the pace. There is not an episode you can just miss. Even with the recap, you would still probably be confused. One thing that NO OTHER SEASON has over this one, hands down (aside from season 9 maybe, idk yet) is flow from season to season. Planning benefits this season GREATLY. It carries over things from the pilot, and sets up more to come in the next season. Watch them all together and it flows more naturally than any other season bookends. (Although I will say all the ninjago season transitions are smoother than any of Chima's [I will not touch that rabbit hole EVER again])

Characters

Character interaction is AMAZING this season. You really get to know the characters and feel all their growth equally. Every. One. Of. Them.

Think about it, Wu has an arc with his brother, Lloyd has an arc with the green ninja, Nya has an arc as samurai x, and it goes without saying that all of our regulars have an arc. And... that's about it. Those are all the characters. And I think that's why this season works so well.

You have four main characters, a handful of side characters, and they all get time and focus. Everyone has something to do during this season. As the season's go on and we accumulate more and more characters there's less screentime to go around, and the characters can suffer for it. There's a reason by season 6 they were literally REMOVING characters from the show. They don't have time to get distracted by Kai and his petty problems and drama this season, cuz Jay needs some focus for once, and we'd like to give him a little development gosh darn it! But I'm getting ahead of myself. This season works really well. Just because I feel like I should, I'm going to give you a breakdown on my feelings on new characters as they pop up or change dramatically, and because this is the first season, that means we get to do it for... all the characters! So here we go.

Nya

She's good this season. She's the most responsible in the group. The samurai x reveal was handled really well. Making all the ninja jealous of her really worked to give her credibility. She's just the right amount of strong and independent while still retaining her femininity. It goes WAY down hill when season 3 hits, but as for season 1 Nya I actually really enjoy her.

Wu

I mean... what are you going to say? He's Wu? Anyone have a problem with Wu? No? Good, moving on.

Kai

So... this is where my bias comes out. Quick piece of info, my elemental personality is water... so like the opposite of fire. I see a little bit of myself in each of the ninja... except Kai. And I think that's why he's my least favorite. Don't get me wrong! I don't hate Kai or anything! He's got some good lines (episode 5 comes to mind) he's adorkable enough. It's not hard to play or to write a hot head, but it's hard to play or write a hot head that I personally enjoy. I think what Kai is missing for me personally is the tripping over himself because of his attitude, and sarcasm. Sarcasm and sass. It's there, it's just not as prevalent as I personally would like it. He has a lot of opportunities and theoretical development, I'm not sure too many of them were taken advantage of fully, or maybe they just didn't read the way I personally can grasp it, but none of it felt very completed or meaningful. Like I said, I'm a water gal, so maybe I just can't relate and that's why it's not as powerful. I'd be interested to see your rankings of the ninja and how they line up with your own elemental personality. There's got to be a correlation there, right?

Conclusion, just not for me

Cole

Cole and Jay are tied for second favorite in general. It fluctuates from season to season depending on what's going on, but for season 1 Jay has Cole beat. I think the only reason just being screen time. Goodness knows Cole has been a bit neglected in that category, but hey. He's still really good for what he's got. I think in real life I probably act the most like Cole. I try to be serious, responsible and a leader and then I just get goofy sometimes. I love his true potential episode! It's funny, and heartwarming, and the only episode actually about him, so it's fun to see!

Conclusion, just needs more love

Jay

Jay is then, my second favorite for the season. He's funny. What else can I say? Personal opinion; Jay freakouts are the best this season. Especially at the climax. He just has that pure goofball-ness to him this season that makes his humor not annoying and actually relatable and funny. I also love his family to death! He loves them, he knows it, we know it, and the interactions between them are precious! It really is the way he plays off of other people that makes him enjoyable. He has a lot more dry humor here than other season, which I am partial to. I've got some kinks to work out with this one in later seasons but for now, he's good.

Conclusion, No, I'm the real Jay!

Zane

...My baby! Especially this season he is so innocent, loving, caring, and mysterious that I can't help but love the heck out of this guy! I am a sucker for a good mystery! He has this whole other world he's a part of with his "sixth sense" and falcon and running away at night. It's unique and special to him and it's really cool! Plus, there is SO much ATMOPHERE that comes with this guy and MAN I LOVE it! It's all just so beautiful. I love interactions between him and Jay, I love his mutual respect with Cole, I love EVERYTHING. This season and the next have the most growth for him, and it shows.

Conclusion, there's a reason we call him the pure one

Romance

Kinda adding this one last minute, but I think it needs to be here. All we got this season is Jay and Nya but BOY has their relationship changed! This is the single one thing that caught me off guard. I forgot what their relationship, especially before Jay's true potential, is like. Honestly, I love it! They're so awkward and clumsy around each other at first, and then grow into this understanding couple of one another. There's not too much emphasis on it, but it's sprinkled in everywhere. I like it! Maya approved!

Villians

The devourer arc is one of my favorites. Maybe it's the nostalgia tingles at work again, but the snakes are ninjago's quintessential villains. Nothing can ever hope to replace them. It feels natural in the plot, they have their own culture and beliefs, and their motivation makes sense. You have your legitimately scary villains and bumbling comic villians in perfect balance. Scales starting as second in command was an amazing call. It proves he has power he's earned, is not easily put down and sets up his lust for power to be explored later. Pythor. Oh man oh man Pythor. I am a sucker for ATMOSPHERE and his introduction is BEAUTIFUL. Utilizes the rule of 3s and completely subverts your expectations with that eerie empty tomb. I love it! So manipulative! So sly! They aren't my all time favorite villians, but they're certainly among the best the show has to offer.

Garmadon is also there. He's half good half bad... sorta. Idk. He's not especially interesting, at least compared to the snakes and what they're up to. Let's be honest, he's just waiting around to get awesome in season 2 ;) I do like when he comes in with all the skeletons like, "yeah, no one likes you. Screw snakes!" Only to walk that COMPLETELY back next season, but you know. Whatever.

Lloyd... should I put him here? He's enjoyably annoying for a little bit... and then just annoyingly annoying. It's not too bad. He has some redeeming moments. Once he's the green ninja and has some responsibility on his shoulders, he gets a lot better.

Climax

... I love it. I don't know what else to say. It's tense, it has proper build up, the threat is real, they get desperate, they come up with a creative solution, they work together, there are stakes, there's good action, good drama, good humor. I don't have any complaints. I can't touch this one. There are minor things, but I don't think they're worth bringing up. Go watch it. It's freaking awesome. Enough said.

Humor

Pretty good this season. There are a few eye roll lines, but that's in all the seasons. Things can get kinda stupid, but for the most part, especially some of the more subtle humor really works.

Favorite line of the season, Cole's "I don't like metaphors" episode 11 - All of Nothing. You're welcome.

Drama

Not overly saturated this season, which is kinda nice. I mean, there's always "drama" but as far as heavy stuff, we have Zane's whole crisis thing, and then the Garmadon family reunion. I'll get to how I feel about the Zane stuff down below. As for the Garmadon stuff... it's fine. Gets a lot better next season, but for now... fine.

Spotlight Episode

So for every season I'll choose one episode that stood out to me to either praise or criticize in detail. There are a lot of episodes that come to mind for season 1 for one reason or another. The one about the power of rumors (also known as the pink ninja episode), lloyd rescuing the team, Cole's true potential is a classic episode with a good mix of heart and comedy, and of course THE FINALE, but because I am biased, and because I am a sucker for personal drama, season one's spotlight episode is episode 7, Tick tock, Zane's true potential. This was by far the episode me and my brother watched together the most. Aside from the movie Cars, it's probably the one piece of media we have scene the most times together. The episode begins by establishing Wu leaving, the ninja are at a loss of what to do and then... THE FALCON. Best character this season! XD seriously, the falcon theme is one of, if not my favorite piece of music in the show. Certainly the most memorable. And most importantly it kicks in the ATMOSPHERE! Have I mentioned ATMOSPHERE?

ATMOSPHERE

I am a sucker for some good ATMOSPHERE (no, I will not stop spelling it in all caps), and BOY the falcon chase scene! Zane is slowly taken away from his team members in order to reflect upon himself, and as he runs through the snow by himself to follow this bird you can see his determination, curiosity, desperation, and just that Zane factor that makes you go "awww, my child! He must be protected!" (Even though, you know, he was built to protect and all that) but just AGHH! I can't put into words for beautiful this whole sequences is! Go watch it right now! Look at that beautiful Zane! Listen to that music! That FREAKING MUSIC AGGHHHHHH! I LOVE IT SO AGGRESSIVELY! LISTEN TO IT! LIKE SERIOUSLY, LISTEN, HERE'S THE LINK!

https://youtu.be/2p07cgwwYws

It makes my heart SO happy! Idk if I'm the only one who feels that way about this scene but oh... oh how it gets me. Every. Time. Michael Kramer and Jay Vincent are freAKING GODS!

Okay. I'm done with the falcon chase. Now onto, like... the part of the episode people care about. The tree house, again, an amazing location. Unique, and mysterious, and as soon as he walks in, you just get this sense of memory. The flash back is ADORABLE and the others finding him... I think this was handled pretty well. Their reactions seem genuine (I mean, I would want to get out of there as soon as humanly possible too XD) and you can feel the genuine concern from all of the ninja, trying to help their buddy out in their own ways.

Zane's true potential feels really earned, and his thing that holds him back was established as soon as the series began. He was different and weird and he didn't know where he came from. Coming to accept what he is, accepting his past and finding an identity of his own is what gives him the power to unlock it.

Now, just for fun and because I know I'm going to hear it in the comments like "why is Zane's discovery of identity more valid than anyone else's? What about Kai! His true potential is entirely based on finding his purpose!" And yes. Theoretical commentor you make a valid point, but I think the key difference is in the identity they find when they unlock it.

Zane accepts his personality, his past, and his robotic nature as himself and can be proud of who he is as his own person. The thing that held him back was vague and sort of indefinable, and what he became afterwards was concrete, solid, and dependable. That's why you feel like the character has gotten stronger.

Kai goes in the opposite direction. The thing that holds him back is that he wants to be the green ninja. That's solid and concrete. The problem then becomes that you know exactly how the potential will play out. He's going to face something, discover he's not the green ninja, and come to terms with it. And his ending identity is much more vague. His purpose is to protect the green ninja... okay, what does that mean? What kind of a person does that make you? He didn't change as a person, his views about a certain topic where changed. Those are two very different levels of progress.

And I know you can argue that it wasn't the green ninja thing he needed to get past, he needed to get past his pride and all that, but even if you make that argument that conclusion is harder to reach and less apparent than Zane's progress as a character. Zane's progress is entirely centered on him. Kai's progress will never be separated from Lloyd. Just watch the episode. It feels like a Lloyd episode. I remember thinking the first time I watched it when he came out of the volcano "wait... what was his true potential? Why is this happening?"

Anyway, that's my little soap box rant. I hope I didn't offend too many Kai fans. Again, it's probably just my water bias coming into play. I know there's a frame work in place for development of all these characters, and every single one of them gets an arc and theoretically everything should work out and make sense and work beautifully and perfectly, but sometimes when you step back and look at it, it's just a matter of "but does it work?" And maybe it's a matter of opinion, but Kai's potential didn't work for me.

I've been on this way to long. I'm stopping now.

Misc

I really like the suits this season. They're all unique and the masks... compliment the Lego head shape nicely? Does that make sense? It makes them look a bit cuter. Anyone else see that? Idk, maybe I'm just going crazy.

Watch this season thinking about how the snakes become good in season 3...

I want more of the Pink ninja.

I love scales and his slight incompetence. Not total, just slight.

This exchange:

Pythor: I hardly have any friends

Lloyd: Woah! I hardly have any friends too!

Pythor: You don't say!

All together I really like this season. Light hearted, funny, good action and characters. Not super compelling or anything, but it doesn't need to be. Second best season for nostalgia tingles in general, third best for me personally. Most of this is a matter of opinion, so don't fret too much over anything I say. I'd love to see your thoughts/rankings/comments/disagreements in the notes! That's the point of this thing!

If there are any aspects of the season I skipped, let me know, I'm not perfect.

Thanks for reading! And if you got this far... I don't know. Work the word saxophone into your comment. Bonus points if it makes sense!

-Maya (a.k.a. parachutingkitten)

[heatherly84]

Ben’s Ultimate Movie Playlist

When he gave this to Zane and Xur, I have no idea. Maybe after they watched Star Wars, I dunno. But watching Star Wars was why. For him, it was actually really fun and exciting to be part of shaping how aliens see his planet. And also he just loves sharing the movies he likes generally.

It was those two goals that drove what ended up in this collection and what didn’t.

So. The list. Alphabetically:

Aladdin (1992)

This is actually Ben’s favorite Disney movie. That started for a typical seven-year-old reason (it was one of the only feature length animated Disney films that wasn’t about a girl), but frequent rewatching and the passage of time has just turned it into pure, unadulterated nostalgia. 

And The Band Played On (1993)

(Author’s note: Did not realize that alphabetizing the list would put the biggest downer on it so close to the top. Whoops. /o\)

This movie made the list, even though Ben has almost no other serious ones on it, because trying to explain the whole gay thing to Ziz and Zia was a nightmare for them as a family (obviously more Nat and Zach, but- Ben cared) and he thought of this movie as the ultimate one that shows what human society has historically thought about it. And maybe that’s something Zane might want to talk to the kids about, with some context to put it in. Essentially: this is Ben trying to help Zane parent. ...that the movie he chose is so depressing says something about how Ben feels about the idea of parenting.

Clue (1985)

Ben doesn’t watch a whole lot of mysteries, but when he was told that Xur liked them, he really tried to squeeze one he really loved out of his memory. This was the first result he got. Sure, it’s not exactly a mystery in the classical sense, but it has one and it’s also really funny. He especially loves that it has three endings (his favorite is the one where Miss Scarlet did it).

Fiddler on the Roof (1971)

Secretly, Ben likes musicals. He blames Disney on general principle. This one is one of his favorites, even though it does edge too close to more serious than he’d like, because he kinda identifies with Tevye. He’s a dreamer and a joker who resolves an incredibly serious issue at one point by just making up bullshit. Yeah, Ben relates.

Inglourious Basterds (2009)

This one ended up on it because of the tendency people have to refer to Zane as Space Hitler. Yeah, Ben thought he’d give him a movie about plotting to kill Hitler when people call him Space Hitler and that seemed totally appropriate. Because Zane’s trying not to be Space Hitler anymore, and that goal is one Ben really wants him to succeed at. So he’s trying to show Zane the lens through which other people see him. He knows it’s something Zane already knows, but he wants it to be something Zane feels. Part of the magic of movies is that they can give people feelings in a way that history lessons and witness statements cannot. (Though he is genuinely anxious that when Zane watches the legendary scene of Hans Landa intimidating a dude into giving up the Jews he’s hiding in the floor, Zane’s going to relate more to Landa than to Shoshanna, the girl in the floor.)

Juno (2007)

The “find him a movie about it” school of teaching people things is an ideal that Ben comes by honestly because it’s how he was raised. If Squirrel didn’t know how to explain something to him, she’d find a movie, a TV show, or a book that did. This was part of a series on sexual responsibility that his mother put him through. She chose it because it got across very nicely “sometimes people get pregnant, and giving the baby up for adoption is a choice available to them- but that can be very hard, even if you’re very sure.” 

For Ben, this is a formative movie that he has a lot of feelings about because of that, but also? It’s funny. And sweet. And has a romance that gave him a lot of feelings as a kid who was bad at socializing, because Paulie Bleaker should not remotely have been able to get a girlfriend like Juno with how awkward he is, but that happens and in context, it even makes sense. Plus, the soundtrack is fucking rad.

Kill Bill - Vol. 1 (2003)

This is just straight-up a fun action movie, with awesome sword fights and insane karate. This edges out most other action movies for Ben because- well, he likes Quentin Tarantino. (He’s the only director represented on the list four times.) And on a somewhat tactless level, he hopes that Zane will identify with someone on a revenge quest for their child, and the twist that the child is actually alive, complete with happy ending. (I suspect that’s not going to be as cool for Zane as Ben is hoping.)

Kill Bill - Vol. 2 (2004)

Well, you can’t rec the first one without the second one! The second one is the one that has the happy ending!

Moana (2016)

The first movie to make it as part of Ben’s Intro To Human Religion series. Ben’s not a particularly religious person, but he recognizes how much of that informs human culture- and also that Zane’s kind of going through a crisis of faith right about now. So here’s a story about what humans think gods are like, what other gods are out there, and what kind of relationship some humans have with them. (Yeah, Moana and Maui have a relationship that’s between god and man. Weird to think of that way, huh? *g*)

Also, it’s just plain got a good story with cool characters and a good soundtrack. ...this is the second time that observation has been part of a movie’s selection for the list. It will not be the last.

Mulan (1998)

Ben’s second favorite Disney movie. (His feelings on Classic Disney, like Snow White and Sleeping Beauty is that yeah, they’re prettier, but he doesn’t like the stories or music as much.) This is very much his Weep A Lot Over My Daddy Issues movie, which is not really a secret. Mulan goes on the quest as part of her search for independent self-identity, sure (and he figures Zane can relate to that), but at the heart of it all, she did everything for her father. 

Ben doesn’t know what it’s like to have a father, but he likes to imagine it involves loving and being loved that much.

Plus: LET’S! GET DOWN! TO BUSINESS!

Newsies (1992)

Part of Ben’s secret love for musicals. This is a favorite- although he’s seen this five hundred times and actually still can’t describe the plot to anybody beyond, “Um. Strike, strike, strike, strike! ...?” But he remembers the songs and the dances. Holy fuck, does he remember the songs and the dances. If he wasn’t tall enough now to hit his head on the ceiling, he would probably still sometimes jump on his bed singing “King of New York.” 

Other than that, he’s also hoping to teach Zane to root for the underdog. Which is a pretty important component to human movies in general, actually.

Prince of Egypt (1998)

Another part of Intro to Human Religion. Ben finds the actual Bible very tedious, but discovered in films that a lot of the stories in it are fucking amazing. This is a good one for that because from the very beginning, the stakes feel tremendously high: it starts with Moses’ mother, a slave, trying to hide her baby from Pharaoh’s soldiers so that he isn’t killed. That is a strong as hell opening, and the movie is very good at keeping you on the edge and very invested in what’s going to happen.

As ways to introduce Zane to the most popular theology on Earth goes, he figures this movie is better than most.

Psycho (1960)

Another that made the list because Ben wanted to have more mysteries for Xur and this was the closest he could think of. This DVD case actually has the plot summary on the back removed with a note stuck in its place that says, “Report back. I wanna know when you cracked the twist.”

Pulp Fiction (1994)

Another Tarantino. This one was chosen because it has more pop culture jammed into its first fifteen minutes than most of the other movies on this list combined. If you wanted to condense everything you needed to know but were afraid to ask about late 20th/early 21st century humans into one movie, it would probably be this one. 

Plus, how fucking legendary is Samuel L. Jackson doing that fake Bible verse?

Plus plus, also a great soundtrack!

Rosemary’s Baby (1968)

Ben realized at some point he had got this far without having even a single horror movie on the list. He’s not a huge fan of horror, but at the same time, he felt like he should make an effort to include one. Just for the sake of exposing them to the idea. ...also, this one’s scary as hell, even though there’s almost no violence and only one special effect in the whole damn thing. That’s actually a majorly impressive achievement.

It cemented its place when he realized that its plot is kind of also a mystery. (The next time he sees Xur, he is going to apologize for how many of his choices are only “sort of” a mystery or “also has a mystery,” nothing is straight-up procedural. He just doesn’t really watch them.)

Saved! (2004)

Continuing Intro To Human Religion, but also borrowing again from his mom’s series on sexual responsibility. (”Keeping the baby is a choice you can make, too.”) This one’s a comedy that’s also a great look at Evangelical Christianity (...it’s very critical of it). He thought it was probably a more helpful choice than Prince of Egypt was, since that one’s about the mythology that inspires people to believe, but this one is about how people who believe actually live. 

He did tape a note to the cover to watch Prince of Egypt first, though. The scene where Mary tries to get G-d to smite her really only makes sense if you already have the context that G-d smites people occasionally.

Se7en (1995)

“Finally, a mystery that’s pretty unambiguously a mystery! Shows police work and research! Excitement! \o/

...okay, yeah, it’s also a gruesome horror movie with a horrifying twist ending, but I’m doing my best here, okay?”

Does not count as Intro to Human Religion, but Ben did consider that some of the movies that are will probably give helpful context to this one.

The Shining (1980)

Also part of his “crap, I should add some horror movies” selection, although like Rosemary’s Baby, it made the list because it’s good and it’s scary, even without a lot of violence or special effects, just something that builds tension and builds it and builds it and builds it until the protagonist snaps and it’s almost a relief that you’re not just waiting for when he’s finally gonna do that anymore.

As human movies go, it’s a fucking great one.

Sound of Music (1965)

This movie appeals to Ben on several levels. One, it’s a musical, and it’s probably one of the best ones, at that. Two, Ben had a desperate hunger as a child for brothers and sisters, and this movie is about seven of them. Just watching them all together was the kind of thing that could suck him into a movie for no other good reason as a kid. Three, they’re siblings in a band. Fuck. Yes.

Oh, and there’s some cool historical drama stuff unfolding.

But mostly that siblings in a band thing.

West Side Story (1961)

Just one more musical! Just one! This actually isn’t one of his favorites (did they not have Latinos in the sixties? Were we invented by a mad scientist in 1985?), but he recognizes that its influence on how musicals would be made afterwards is important and worth acknowledging. Also, they managed to make Romeo and Juliet without suicide, that’s pretty cool.

And who among us could ever resist singing “I Feel Pretty” in the shower after hearing it for the first time?

Yours, Mine, and Ours (1968)

This movie is basically sibling porn* for people who used to fervently wish they had siblings. Ben grew up enraptured by the relationship between Mike and Philip as they go from stepbrothers to brothers. He also still falls over laughing over the line, “My sister’s locked herself in the bathroom and she can’t get out and I can’t get in and it’s my turn!” “Which sister?” “I don’t know her name yet, but she’s stuck for sure!”

It’s also basically “being a military family” porn for people who might be into that. Like, for instance, Xur or Zane.