#youre goin in the official tags fuck it
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
um like fanart of renee with his new nerf gun cause i’m obsessed with mm
@coldresolve would’ve sent this in an ask but u have ur images off. sorry 😭
#im freaking OUT this is amazing!!!!!#look at him with his smug lil smile what an ass akdsjlkff#renee#youre goin in the official tags fuck it#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#what an amazing thing to wake up to#😭😭😭 look at him guys its my boy#you put so mcuh effort into this im gonna cry#im gonna stare at this for a few hours now excuse me#alkdsjflsdkhsfjkdsfakjkljfsdjhhjknnnngngngmgmgmgngh#moneymakers fanart tag
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UNDER YOUR TOUCH
Summary: After her difficult breakup, Tiana wanted to start anew with her life. That's when she realized her life would be better when she met him.
This fanfic is 18+! NO MINORS ALLOWED
word count: 3247
smut warning; it’ll come in the story randomly so PLEASE PLEASE look out for it I’m not really good at writing ✍🏽 smuts but I’m improving at the moment.
Jey Uso x Tiana
AWFUL GRAMMAR IM GETTING BETTER I SWEAR LOL.
comments, likes, repost are appreciated I would love the constructive feedback in what area I need to approve in. 🤍
ALSO! I don’t not want nobody stealing my fanfics or take it as theirs that will be an issue fasho so keep it cute respectfully.
I only own my OC along with the make up scenarios
But I’ll be writing along the way since this story is in my drafts on Wattpad right now so yuh. 💁🏽♀️
TAGS ⬇️ lmk if you wanna be tag 🏷️
@pinkwithhearts @jstarr86 @biancasreign @empressdede
@angiedawn02 @fearlesschimera @paigereeder
V.
JEY I was on a mission to plan out this surprise for Tiana later tonight with the help of Bianca, Trin, and Jon. Of course, I wanted to make things official with her because her aura and energy felt so good to me. I love being around allat.
I was at the mall shopping with Bianca while Trin was making decorations. We went inside Pandora to check out some jewelry that I got for Tiana. She's a special girl and definitely deserves it.
"Do you know what size ring she wears B?" I asked as she nodded her head.
"Yeah, of course. She's a size six, and I Ion' know if you've been paying attention to her jewelry lately, but she loves bracelets, especially charm bracelets, " she said as we went to pick out the jewelry.
"I'll keep that in mind for the future then." We both laughed at each other.
After we left Pantora, I went to Foot Locker to get her some new kicks, while Bianca went somewhere else. We'll meet again.
But I went inside the place, finding her some shoes that she'll like or that we can match one day, so I just picked out whatever.
'Yes, I am spoiling the fuck outta her'
I came out of the place, seeing Bianca with a Victoria Secret bag in her hands. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion, and she looked at me with a grin.
"Who is that for?" I asked.
"Well, it's for Tiana. Don't tell her that, though. It's something that she could pull off in front of you, and if you like it, so." Bianca said.
"Ight bet then you finna get her in trouble, B." She chuckled at me as we walked towards the car.
✧.*
After we did all of our shopping together I had to stop by the flower shop to get Tiana some white roses because I knew that those were her favorites as I paid for the roses I was headed out towards my car before I could do that I've seen Kehlani with her hoe ass friends while her eyes darted my way.
She had a smirk on her face as she and her hoe-ass friends came right up to me while I put the roses in the front seat next to me.
"Hey papi, are those flowers for me?" Kehlani said as she rubbed all over me.
I felt uncomfortable with her being up all on me I only like it when Tiana is like this with me so I just gently pushed her off me.
"No, these roses aren't for you, and secondly, back up off me." I said sternly while folding my arms.
"This must be for yo' bitch, huh? Jey, she's not better than me, and you know it." She said as I scoffed in disbelief.
'This girl is delusional as fuck dawg.'
"I ain't goin' to repeat it; watch your mouth, Kehlani, and she is better than you."
"Nigga whatever you know where home is, boy, stop playing with me."
"Last time I checked, my home is with my girl, not with you, so please take your delusional ass and your hoe ass friends somewhere else with allat I got things to do." I retorted while grabbing my keys out my pocket.
I went inside of my car as I turn on the ignition switch while pulling out the parking lot seeing her face being pissed off knowing her hoe-ass friends were comforting her.
I texted Tiana, telling her that she needed to be ready around nine because I wanted to take her out to dinner somewhere private, just me and her. Even though Trin, Bianca, and Jon would be there, they'll be hidden somewhere.
I pray that she'll like it and don't feel overwhelmed by this.
✧.*
TIANA I was finishing up my clients nails for today as usual when she paid me and gave me a huge ass tip for today I sighed with joy, knowing that I love doing my job.
But I got a text from Josh telling me I needed to be ready around nine, which confused me a little bit, especially since I didn't see Bianca today, only Montez. So I wonder what he has planned for tonight.
As I was cleaning up my equipment and space, I received a text from an unknown number. I sighed, thinking that it was Malakai, but when I saw the text, I already knew who it was.
Unknown number: Jey is cheating on you girl so don't flatter yourself. Tiana: Girl you know I'm not stupid right? So you can shut that shit up honestly. Unknown number: he doesn't want you he know where home is at. Tiana: how about you take yo' delusional ass of my phone and tell somebody else that also get blocked hoe.
I blocked his ex-girlfriend's number while closing up shop. As I headed towards my BMW, I unlocked the car and threw my purse in the seat next to me as I started to pull out the parking lot.
I was listening to some music in the car on my way back home when Josh called.
OTP Jey: mamas what you doing baby? Tiana: I'm driving home Josh so I could get ready for tonight. Jey: ight baby, you good? you seem irritated. Tiana: somewhat like that Jey: what happened? Tiana: Your ex Kehlani I don't how she got my number but she was texting me some bullshit. Jey: what? Tiana: yeah I had to block her ass. Jey: what was she sayin' Tiana: she was saying how you know where home is and that you didn't want me.
I heard him scoffed over the phone while chuckling.
Jey: god she is so delusional and desperate man. Tiana: I know it's crazy. Jey: well I'll come pick you up for tonight. Tiana: what do you have planned Josh? Jey: you'll see mamas I'm not spilling. Tiana: fineeee, I love you Jey: I love you too baby.
CALLED ENDED.
Hearing him say he loves me just brings me joy every day. It feels like I am in a dream or something. I wasn't expecting to be in a relationship so good.
It was so much better being with Josh than Malakai because Kai had never done these things with me. All we ever did was fuck, and that was it.
It made me feel like I was being used for my body and not being loved by him like I am with Josh.
✧.* I checked myself out in the mirror, seeing that I looked good for tonight. I was nervous because I knew that Josh had something planned up his sleeve. He wasn't slick, but I played the role for now.
I saw a car pull up, knowing that it was Josh. Montez was calling for me, and I walked downstairs, seeing Bianca coming, including Josh. He never fails to look good.
He smiled at me, holding my favorite roses in his hands. I smiled back at him. God, he looked so good and fine.
Wearing all black and with his silver chain on his neck, including his Rolex on his wrist, I saw Bianca smile at me while she whispered.
"I've got a surprise for you when you get there, girl," Bianca whispered as I nodded my head.
I walked up towards Josh, standing on my tippy toes. I kissed him on the lips and looked into his eyes.
"You ready princess?" Jey asked as he handed me my roses.
"Yes I'm ready." I said.
We interlocked our hands together while leaving the house. Jey opened the door for me as I got in, and he shut the door next to me before heading inside his car.
As we were driving to the place, Jey and I were listening to music until this song, ' Get You,' came on. I and he listened to the song while his hand was on my thigh.
'Through drought and famine, natural disasters My baby has been around for me Kingdoms have fallen, angels be callin' None of that could ever make me leave, yeah'
I darted my eyes towards Jey, who was focused on the road. Seeing him drive with one hand just did something to me, but he looked so good. Everything was so good about him.
His side profile was so pretty that I couldn't stop admiring him. I think he noticed that I was admiring him as he stopped at a red light, turning my direction.
Grabbing my face he placed a few kisses on my lips as he pulled away and continued to drive.
'Every time I look into your eyes, I see it You're all I need Every time I get a bit inside, I feel it'
These lyrics were deep because of how Jey and I are right now; it just feels so right. That's when I started singing the lyrics to Jey.
"Ohh, who would've thought I'd get you?" I serenade to Jey as he smiled at me
'Ooh, who would've thought I'd get you?'
We finally pulled up at the restaurant, and it looked so aesthetically beautiful. I wasn't expecting us to be going here, but I knew that this was going to be my favorite restaurant.
He held his hand in mine as we walked inside, opening the door for me as I looked around the place. It was so fancy.
Josh was speaking to the greeter about our reservations as they walked us towards the elevator. I was honestly confused as to why we were going up until I saw why.
We were on the top floor, and my mouth went wide open. The view was absolutely beautiful. Words couldn't even describe how he put this together.
He saw my reaction as we walked towards our table while sitting down.
"This is just half of it baby." Jey commented as my eyebrows furrowed a bit.
"What do you mean half of it Josh? What is happening right now?" I asked him, being the impatient person I am.
"You'll see baby calm down girl." He said.
We were enjoying ourselves while we were drinking some wine, as I saw him getting up and holding his hand out.
"C'mon mama dance with me." He said as I held his hand into mines while we began dancing.
'And when we're making love, uh Your cries, they can be heard from far and wide It's only the two of us Everything I need between those thighs'
'Every time I look into your eyes, I see it You're all I need Every time I get a bit inside, I feel it'
Jey spun me around as he bent me down while holding my back as he held me up. He can dance really well, so what isn't he good at?
We looked into each other's eyes deeply while pulling our bodies close together, I can't believe that this is actually happening to me.
He placed a kiss on my cheek, whispering in my ear, "I got a surprise at the hotel, mama." Damn how many surprises does this man have?
We continue to dance while embracing each other more closely.
✧.* After a few more drinks, we finally made it to the hotel. Jey covered my eyes. Honestly, I was terrified to see what the hell this surprise was. He guided me through the room while removing his hands from my eyes.
When I told you I wanted to cry, I wanted to cry so bad. It was so beautiful, and all of the gifts I've seen on the bed just warmed my heart.
I turned around to hug Jey so tightly as he hide the same giving me a kiss on the lips.
"You love it mama?" Jey asked.
I sniffed my nose while wiping my tears away from my eyes.
"Yes, I love it so much, Josh. Omg, you mischievous man," I said while hitting him in the chest.
"Ight, ight girl calm down." He said.
'Ooh, who would've thought I'd get you? Oh yeah, oh yeah, babe Ooh, who would've thought I'd get you?'
My eyes noticed a dart towards the Victoria's Secret bag on the bed, and then it clicked to me about what Bianca had said about a surprise she had for me.
I went towards the bed, grabbed the bag, and saw two pieces of red lingerie in there—my favorite color. I love my bestie so much, so I took it out; it looked so good.
Until I saw Jey walking towards me with a smirk on his face, he stood in front of me.
"Why don't you put that on baby? Lemme see how it look on you." He said as he held my chin up.
'Ouu Bianca what did you do girl?'
SMUT WARNING.
Jey had pulled my lingerie to the side as he was beating my shit in, as my eyes were rolling in the back of my head, moaning his name loudly.
I felt him put pressure on my back as he dug his dick deeper inside of me, causing me to grip the sheets tightly.
'And I'll take some time Just to be thankful That I had days full of you, you Before it winds down into (Got someone you like, feel something that's right) The memories, it's all just memories (Somebody, just tell somebody) Now'
"Fucccck Dadddy..." I moaned as he smack my ass.
"Uh-Huh...mama, this daddy's pussy.." Jey grunted as he moved his hips faster and deeper inside of me.
My back was hurting as I tried to get up only for him to push me down while making me feel miserable underneath him.
"Nah keep that shit arched mama." I loved when he is dominant and aggressive with me.
'(If you've got someone you like) Don't you love when I come around? (Feel something that's right) (Somebody, just tell somebody) Build you up then I take you down (If you've got someone you like) Don't you love when I come around? (Feel something that's right) (Somebody, just tell somebody) Build you up then I take—'
As he was pounding me to oblivion, I felt him grab a whole head of my hair as he pulled me up toward his body, making me look at him.
He smirked at my facial expression knowing that he was fucking me good, giving me a good dick. He grabbed my throat firmly, continuing to thrust into me deeply.
"Fuck, mama looking so good in this lingerie baby." He cooed.
"Y-yeah D-daddy?" I breathed out.
"Yeah, mama look so sexy.." I felt myself clenching onto his dick, causing him to groan softly in my ear was music to my ears until he let me go while pulling out, which caused me to whine.
He turned me towards the side of my body and got back to work at it, thrusting into me deeper, causing me to moan loudly.
He was hitting my g-spot so good I was seeing stars in the back of my head as my mouth parted open as I made eye contact with him.
Grabbing me by the throat yet again as he pound into me vigorously, hitting my spot so good.
"J-Joshhhh! W-wait!" I cried out tapping his arm.
"Nah gimme that shit mama, make a mess on this bed." He purred as he smacked my ass.
'Ooh, who would've thought I'd get you? Oh yeah, oh yeah, babe Ooh, who would've thought I'd get you?'
I felt myself squirting on this man as I cursed under my breath as tears came out of my eyes as I felt my legs shaking uncontrollably knowing that he didn't give a damn as he kept going.
'This feels like summer Boy, you make me feel so alive Just be my lover Boy, you'll lead me to paradise'
My moans became very high-pitched noises as my facial expressions were growing more intense the more he kept thrusting inside of me.
The way his dick stuffed inside of me going in and out of me.
"you belong to me baby?" Jey cooed.
"Yesss, Josh, I belong to you." I whimpered weakly as my eyes went to the back of my head.
Both of us were moaning and groaning loudly and cursing as his dick was stretching me out so good.
"she so wet for me, fat Ma knows what it is right baby?"
"God! Yes Daddy!" I managed to get out I couldn't even comprehend or get the first few words out of my mouth.
I felt drool coming down my face going straight on the sheets, "You fuck me so good, Josh." He smiled down at me, knowing.
"Oh, I know ma."
I didn't know how much I could take from this, as I felt that same pit in my stomach again. Jey noticed my facial expressions.
That gave him the opportunity to go deeper inside of me, causing me to squeal loudly as his hips found the perfect rhythm to make me reach my second orgasm.
"cum for me again, princess, make a mess." He growled while pushing into me deeply.
I grabbed his arm that was wrapped around my neck still as I let it go cumming all over this man, feeling defeated.
My legs were uncontrollably shaking and aching as I was breathing heavily up and down, his movements were getting sloppier and sloppier knowing that he was going to nut.
As he kept his rhythm going, I couldn't even moan anymore as I felt defeated and lost. My mind was foggy from this sensation.
"Imma fill yo' pussy up like a Twinkie mama." He meant that shit, too as he gave his all while cursing underneath his breath.
He groaned loudly as he filled me up like he said he would. It felt so warm inside of me while he pulled out of me, gazing down at me.
SMUT OVER.
I was breathing heavily as my chest was going up and down while looking up at Jey, who was gazing down at me with his hands on his hips.
I tried to get up but ended up falling on the ground laughing as Jey held me up by my waist, holding me tightly.
"C'mere mama let's go take a shower together." Jey said as he carried me to the bathroom.
I just knew I was going to get fucked yet again.
Under Your Touch.
tianasworld, zillafatu, biancabelairwwe, and 300,000 people liked your post.
uceyjucey: my perfection 🫶🏽😮💨 tianasworld: I love you so much baby. 🤍 uceyjucey: @ tianasworld I love you too mama you deserve it. 🤍 zillafatu: okayyyy uce i see you spoiling yo' girl did you finally make it official? uceyjucey: @ zillafatu yessir 💁🏽♂️ biancabelairwwe: omggg 🥹🤍 theyhatelani: wtf why didn't I get that type of treatment? uceyjucey: @ theyhatelani didn't yo' ass cheat on me? Oh yeah I forgot you did.
Read all 100,456 comments.
uceyjucey replied to your story: you deserve it mama. biancabelairwwe replied to your story: i love this for you girl finally. 🫶🏽 shelovekai replied to your story: bro tf you mean by that I did everything for you. shelovesemma replied to your story: oh my goooood Tiana did your new man do this??? shelovekai replied to your story: bro he ain't better than me Tiana.
Phewwww man oh man, Jey did his big one with this I hope yall enjoyed this chapter lmk in the comments.
Stay Ucey
#jey uso#black writers#black fanfic writer#jey x oc black#black oc#wwelove#black reader#wwe fanfiction#jey uso fanfiction#jey uso smut
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✮ 𝐦𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐚 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐬, zegras' have more fun
♡ ─ summary | media day pictures (NOT MINE AND IT'S NOT THE FC) and something makes the jack stans go crazy
♡ ─ warnings | light-hearted flirting/arguing, brief mention of hate crimes (ITS A JOKE THOUGH), hughes bros being dumb (not trev for once LMAO)
♡ ─ taglist | tbd
♡ ─ ev's notes | this lowkey eats I MISSED THIS AU
back to navigation back to AU masterlist
stasszegras ann arbor, michigan
Liked by trevorzegras, lhughes_06, jackhughes and 9,935 more
stasszegras | media day pics, first (official) fnl + WENT LOWKEY VIRAL ON TIKTOK???? tagged: pchandler68, umichfootball, lucafantilli september 23th, 2022
View all 1,008 comments
briesbagels | my favorite tiktok influencer 🤭
↳ stasszegras stop it. 😐
↳ briesbagels 3 million views on a tiktok IS CRAZYYY
↳ stasszegras it's only cus luke was in the video
↳ lhughes_06 clout chaser 😝
briesbagels | LAST PIC OF LUCA IS HORRENDOUS PLS STASS 😫😫
↳ lucafantilli ok this one hurts brie, i thought u were on my side
↳ briesbagels its either u or stass (im choosing my girl)
↳ stasszegras 🤭😏😍
↳ pchandler68 hmmmmm 😏😏
↳ adamfantilli 🥸🥸
↳ stasszegras what's goin on here.... 😥
umichwsoccer | THATS OUR GIRL! 🫡〽️
↳ stasszegras 🤞🏼🤞🏼
jackhughes | wowww okay stassie.. 🤞🏼🤩 woo 😮💨😮💨
↳ trevorzegras 😟😟 oh no
↳ lhughes_06 since when we callin her stassie????
↳ jackhughes WE?? get ur own nickname lukey 😑😑
↳ stasszegras k y'all let's just stick to stass or little zegras 😶
↳ trevorzegras @/griffinzegras
↳ griffinzegras bffr right now 📸📸📸 aren't you like 30 jack??
↳ jackhughes actually i'm 21 so calm the FUCKK down... and i was just being nice and friendly griff come on now
↳ briesbagels and thats why we wear sunscreen kids 🥴
↳ griffinzegras yea maybe a little too friendly..
↳ stasszegras guys im gonna disable my comments if u keep arguing like 12 year olds
↳ trevorzegras mhm yeah and thats the ONLY REASON why you would wanna disable the comments
lucafantilli | last pic should be considered a hate crime bro how'd u even get that
↳ stasszegras don't ask stupid questions like that luca
↳ adamfantilli 🥸🥸
↳ lucafantilli MY OWN BROTHER?!?!?!
↳ lhughes_06 i guess we are all getting betrayed by our flesh and blood rn 😪
↳ jackhughes be so fr rn lukey
↳ trevorzegras agreed luke
↳ jackhughes 😑😑
↳ pchandler68 interesting.. 📸
quinnhughes | you ate little zegras 🫡
↳ stasszegras thanks quinner 🫶🏼
↳ trevorzegras YEA this is really being friendly @/jackhughes
↳ jackhughes bro. let this go.
↳ quinnhughes leave me the fuck outta this guys, please 😁
lhughes_06 | gonna win us a jr world cup zegras ✊🏼
↳ stasszegras YESSS SIR 🫡🫡〽️〽️ but thats not how it works buddy
↳ lhughes_06 there's no jr world cup????
↳ jackhughes messi is rolling in his grave rn
↳ stasszegras messi is alive????
↳ briesbagels no way bro 😭😭
↳ quinnhughes LMAO PLEASE 😭
pchandler68 | LUCA LOL PLEASE HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH
↳ lucafantilli count your days chandler
↳ pchandler68 wait no luca im sorry
↳ lucafantilli its ur fault u introduced me and stass and NOW LOOK. all the hoes are gone
↳ stasszegras 😑😑😑
↳ adamfantilli not all of them.....🥯🥯🥯
↳ lucafantilli shut up adam.
↳ pchandler68 wait what??...
adamfantilli future manager AND she plays for our soccer team?? it's perfect 🤞🏼🤞🏼
↳ stasszegras hahaahaha no.
↳ nolan_moyle STASS PLEASE
↳ stasszegras stop harassing me nolan
jhughesnews
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jhughesnews | jack hughes and anastasia zegras are reportedly going out after he comments a suggestive comment on her most recent post. thoughts???
View all 2,190 comments
fan01 | WHAT?? NO WAY????? WHO WAS GOING TO TELL ME
fan02 | guys they are just friends, if u guys look at her other posts he makes those kinda jokes all the time
↳ fan03 nah bro did u see trevor and griffin's comments? they obviously know something we don't
↳ fan02 yeah but that's their humor
fan04 | good 😭😭😭 for😭😭😭 them 😭😭😭
fan05 | didn't she go out with luke too 😐
↳ fan06 damn she wants the whole crew
↳ fan07 who can blame her tho??? have u seen them 🤭🤭
↳ fan08 no she didn't lmao, those were also JUST rumors and it's obvious they're just friends
fan09 | guys stop it, these are baseless rumors and REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENS TO TAYLOR ALL THE TIME, stass is great just by herself 🫶🏼
↳ fan10 all right girl..
↳ fan11 its giving "coach is right guys... 😣"
↳ fan12 im crying BYEEE PLEASE 😭😭😭😭
-> make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated! <-
thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡
#zegras' have more fun au#nhl imagine#nhl#nhl oneshot#nhl fic#hockey#jack hughes#nhl fanfiction#hockey fic#jack hughes blurb#jack hughes fic#jack hughes x reader#jack hughes imagine#jack hughes x y/n#jack hughes x you#jack hughes x oc#luke hughes x oc#luke hughes blurb#luke hughes fic#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes imagine#luke hughes x you#luke hughes x y/n#trevor zegras x reader#trevor zegras fluff#trevor zegras imagine#trevor zegras#luke hughes#alex turcotte#nhl hockey
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hey, uh. hi. yeah. sorry i dont know why im doing this. im pretty sure youre dead. god i hope you arent. maybe this is just the digital form of visiting someones grave eh? yeah, i dunno. its lonely without you. keep wanting to tag you in things, god i fucking wish i could still tag you in things. i was a little scared to send this one, even just to write it, but id rather you be alive and proving me a fool for writing this than dead. maybe with my luck the universe’ll wanna make me look stupid so bad that ur actually fine. i miss you. ive been waiting the past few days you know that? waiting to be wrong waiting for you to come back waiting for this to be like the other times, but its been four days now. i just. i hope you found peace man, i hope if you are dead its better than anything ever was back here, you deserve it.
while im here i figure i may as well catch you up on everything goin on, not anywhere near as good as getting to freak out about it on here with you but i think its the best im gonna get. so basically a couple days ago frank posted five random dates in the shape of the mcr logo and that was. jesus frank. the dates are 11/13, 2/16, 3/7, 2/24, and 12/6. i now live in fear. and then today the official mcr account posted a picture with a background that looks reminiscent of paper kingdom, oh god, 150 peices of,, ash? confetti?? falling down over large red letters that spell out a backwards k and then cr. so basically. going insane over if this is mcr5 or not. fuck youll never get to see mcr5 will you? fucking scary, feels wrong to get excited about it without you. i hope youre okay, i really fucking hope youre okay and all this is for nothing i hope youre in the hospital because soneone found you before it was too late and you just cant have your phone because of it, i hope you didnt even do anything and youre just staying off tumblr just anything, please, fuck man you have to be okay alright?? im scared, i really miss you, i know we werent that close or even close at all but you mean do much to me alright i need you i need you to be fine. i hope you see this. oh, on the topic of not being close, i uh. never learned your real name. i made a small patch with your username and put it in the left breast pocket of my coat, i hope thats alright. wanted you close to me and all
i think thats it, so uh. this is goodbye i suppose. i didnt get to say goodbye before. saw your post 2 hours late. it hurts, i try not to get too caught up in the what ifs though. its hard. so goodbye friend, until next time. i hope to see you again. i love you.
I'm not dead!
I'm sorry I scared you like really badly but I'm okay
What happened was I like almost didn't but I didn't go deep enough to do any real harm to myself
I cut a little but not the full way so I'm fine but if I had went all the way I would probably be gone bc no one did like come in my room for a while after
I've just been staying off of here and not really posting because I didn't really think anyone would really care if I was dead or not
But I know you do
Also I really appreciate you saying what's been happening with MCR thank u
I know abt everything but still u telling me is really sweet, thank you
The patch is really nice, thank you
I feel like doing something similar since u did that and I probably scared the living shit out of you so yeah something with ur user maybe idk is that weird idk
I love you too man
I'm really sorry for scaring you I just didn't know what to do that day and I'm sorry for not really posting anything after that 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤
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writerly ephemera
✨ share some little bits of you, easter eggs, memories, etc. you have left scattered in your fics or art. if you fancy it, tag a pal. ✨
thank you to the lovely @moondal514 for the tag, and shoutout to the wonderful @decaflondonfog for starting this up!! one thing about me is i love yapping about the behind-the-scenes of my fics
Andrew’s gaze is heavy, like Aaron’s spiraling thoughts are displaying on the dashboard screen amid the radio information: 101.1 Columbia’s Alt Rock Hits — my mother died in a car crash i could kill myself or someone else just as easily and knowing my luck i probably will — Now playing: Sugar, We’re Goin Down by Fall Out Boy — (on the cusp of getting it right)
since getting a functioning aux cord i rarely, if ever, listen to the radio BUT when i do, my favorite local station is 101.1 because they're always playing alt rock. also, writing this scene was terribly amusing to me because (1) this was for last year's T&N fest and was posted anonymously and i was certain i'd exposed myself by mentioning fob by name and (2) when i was learning to drive, my dad never EVER allowed me to have anything playing during a driving lesson. and you know what. he was right to bc i did once nearly crash while trying to change the song when doing practice hours with my mom.
What he learned was that Aaron’s shoulders tensed first when he was scared. What he learned was that Aaron liked things in threes and fives. What he learned was that Aaron was a creature of habit who got cranky when his routines were disrupted. What he learned was that they shared a distaste for mayonnaise, an inability to sleep on their right sides,... (breaking every finger, praying that it makes me clean)
all of the above are true of me as well!
Dan, Matt, and Renee burst in, the latter mediating a debate between the couple about something useless and incomprehensible as usual. “I’m just saying, I don’t give a fuck if Harry has had the most successful solo career, I’m going to be a Louis girl ‘til the day I die.” (proof of survival)
take a wild guess who my favorite member of one direction is
Aaron would love to have an answer. At first he’d thought it was exams: there’s nothing like the last two weeks of a semester to send him into a soul-crushing, mind-destroying study spiral to prepare for three straight days of tests that will directly impact his future. But it’s officially winter break and he should be relaxing, yet he can’t shake the tight flutter of nerves behind his collarbone. (call the parents, tell them i'm okay)
right around my collarbones/upper chest/throat area is where i tend to feel the physical effects of my own anxiety
On the table directly in front of him are rows and rows of pin-back buttons in an overwhelming number of color combinations, each emblazoned with PSU PRIDE ALLIANCE in blocky font. (despite everything, i'm still human)
tbh this whole fic is projection central, but this was inspired by my school's annual coming out day table in the campus center, which had tons of buttons and is where i got the aromantic and asexual pins that lived on my backpack for the rest of my undergrad years
unrelated to the fic but still feels relevant: someone in my spanish class who i barely spoke to all semester let me know on the last day of class that he saw my ace flag pin and wondered what it was and that eventually led to him not only learn what it meant but to figure out that he is also ace. i don't think i ever saw him again but i think about him a lot. i'm so glad he told me that.
In the bakery, a package of cookies for you. Frosted in ice blue and dotted with snowflake-shaped sprinkles. (leftovers)
i didn't describe them with specifics in the fic but i was thinking of the lofthouse brand sugar cookies with frosting that are the subject of much debate on the internet bc so many people think they're gross. however they are very gorgeous to me. dessert of all time imo
There is a house inside Katelyn’s mind. In the room where she harbors her instincts regarding her boyfriends’ respective addictions, a light switches on. This bulb is rarely used anymore; it flickers, uncertain. The room it hesitantly illuminates is bare but for a floor littered with dusty liquor bottles and orange pill canisters prescribed to a dead woman. At the threshold, by her feet: a bottle, empty. “Kevin,” Katelyn says, standing in that doorway, looking at him over her shoulder. (i've known this dream for a long time)
this is one of my favorite metaphors i've ever written. partly because i love inventing incorporeal spaces like this as a way to represent emotions, and partly because this specific metaphor is a reference to something only i'll get. it references the original novel i wrote a couple years back, about a young woman and the ghost who is possessing her. whichever one of them is not presently in control of her body retreats to a house that 'exists' in her mind. inventing that internal world was the most fun part of writing that story (i'm hoping to edit that novel into something readable or at the very least repurpose the concept at some point)
no-pressure tags (sorry if you've been tagged/done this already!): @merceyca @cummandercold @jaywalkers
#steph writes#one thing about me i am gonna throw in a self-reference that no one else will understand. as a treat for me
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Diabolik Lovers LOST EDEN ー Subaru Dark [07]
CHAPTER MASTERLIST
Monologue
ーー Eden, which has been under supervision of the Mukami family,
was attacked by the Vibora Clan.
Those are the words which came from Reiji-san’s mouth,
as he spoke to all of us in the living room.
And at the same time,
he cast his eyes downwards,
as if something did not click with him.
I wonder if Reiji-san,
had something on his mind.
ー The scene starts in the living room of the Sakamaki manor
Reiji: ...Zweig is a person of character. He would never attack another clan without there being an official declaration of war.
I simply cannot help but feel like he must have had some kind of reason...that or there’s something else behind it...
...Either way, I shall have my Familiar investigate the Vibora Clan’s course of action.
You lot must all keep your guard up high as well.
Yui: Y-Yes...
( Apparently none of the Mukami’s got hurt but... )
( I’m worried about them and Eden as well... )
Subaru: ...What? Worried?
Yui: Eh?
Subaru: Aren’t you worried ‘bout those guys?
Yui: ( Those guys...He’s talking about Ruki-kun and the others, right? )
( Can I be honest with him? If possible, I’d love to be able to go there to check up on them but... )
( Subaru-kun has yet to learn to fully control his powers, so he probably wouldn’t want to go there, right...? )
Selection
→ I’m not
Yui: ...No, I’m not worried.
Subaru: Don’t be lyin’. It’s written all over your face.
You can’t fool me that easily.
Yui: ...! S-Sorry.
→ Yeah, I am... (❦)
Yui: Yeah, I’m worried...
Subaru: ...I figured you’d say that.
Subaru: Although the only way to find out how they’re doin’ is by goin’ to Eden...
...The Demon World, huh...?
Yui: ( I guess it’s difficult after all... )
( If we consider the possibility of his powers running rampant over there...It only makes sense to remain here instead. )
Subaru: ーー Guess we have no other choice. Let’s go.
Yui: ...Are you sure?
Subaru: Haah? I thought you wanted to go?
Yui: O-Of course I do!
Subaru: ...Then shut up and follow me. If you cause me any more unnecessary worries, it’s game over for you, capiche?
Yui: Thank you, Subaru-kun!
Reiji: ...Well then, I shall send a Familiar to Ruki to inform him of our coming.
Kanato: Before we leave...I better stuff my bag with as many sweets as I can fit in there.
Ayato: Hehe, things are gettin’ interestin’ now.
Subaru: ...Oi. Don’t tell me all of you are gonna come with us!?
Laito: Well, I’m sure you’d be lonely all by yourself, wouldn’t you?
Shuu: I just don’t want for this whole situation to get even worse, that’s all.
Subaru: Che, fuck off. I never asked for any of this...
Yui: Oh come on, don’t be like that...Why don’t we all go together, okay?
Subaru: ...
Hmph. Whatever.
Shuu: ...Look who’s not being honest with himself again.
Yui: ( Subaru-kun is the youngest after all...So despite what they might say, I’m sure they’re all worried about him. )
( While they may not get along that well on a daily basis...I guess they’re still family in the end. )
Monologue
And so, we decided to head off towards Eden.
Even though Subaru-kun,
was not too stoked about the idea of everyone tagging along,
personally I found it very reassuring.
Because I strongly believed,
that they chose to come with us,
because deep down they know how kind (優しい) of a person Subaru-kun is.
I just cannot help but feel that way.
After all, it has been that kindness of him,
which has saved me (救われてきた) time after time.
ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー
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hi malloy i want to listen to more fob do you have any song recommendations?
hellow vic! gosh how do i recommend fob to someone when the discography is so large and varied... hmmmmmm
ok i’ll separate by album so you can like choose what you wanna listen to depending on your style, with one gateway song that i think is a good intro to it and a personal fav
under the cut because i got carried away (like seriously i ended up writing a paragraph for each album 💀) but there are eight albums so sixteen recs for you👍
malloy’s crash course in fob albums + what to listen to first
take this to your grave — their first official album, a pop punk staple, extremely pop punk very clearly showing their hardcore roots:
gateway song: grand theft autumn/where is your boy (teehee its my url song but also i believe every person dipping their toes into the scene needs to listen to this song. it’s that iconic)
a fav that u should also listen to: saturday (this song means a lot to the band! they close every single show with it! and also it goes off!!)
from under the cork tree — the breakthrough album, the album with sugar we’re goin down and dance dance, another pop punk staple but now with slightly more pop friendly elements:
gateway song: a little less sixteen candles a little more “touch me” (another hit single and also just. a bop. an absolute bop)
a fav that u should also listen to: the music or the misery (this one isnt even on the actual album it’s technically an additional track from a deluxe edition. however i think it’s going to be in my spotify top 5 this year. the hook goes SO hard)
infinity on high — probably the most popular among fans? ive already said this album is insane it had such a perfect mix of their pop punk sound with stuff like soul, r&b, horns and violins… fucking insane. this is the one with bang the doldrums:
gateway song: i’m like a lawyer with the way i’m always trying to get you off (mmm i feel like i can eat this song it’s so comfy and easy to get into)
a fav that u should also listen to: i’ve got all this ringing in my ears and none on my fingers (OUGH. the orchestrations.. the piano!! the horns!!! patrick’s ba ba ba ba ba ba ba da da during the bridge. a banger.)
folie à deux — this one goes hard. it was a very different album so there were a lot of people who hated it when it first came out but now it’s commonly agreed that it’s one of their best!! folie is like ioh with the experimentation turned up even more with lyrical focus on criticizing the media and celebrity culture among other things and it is cool ✨:
gateway song: she’s my winona (catchy as hell, i’ve always thought it was the best track to introduce someone to folie)
a fav that u should also listen to: america’s suitehearts (my fob tag (#you don’t don’t know you’re a legend) is lyrics from this song. it is. really fun to sing to and the music video is wonderfully trippy)
save rock and roll — first post-hiatus album! these next three are very different from the previous albums, way more pop than pop punk. srar itself is what i can only describe as an album that sounds so 2013 radio pop rock sometimes feel like i’ve regressed 10 years and the next song i’m going to listen to is counting stars by onerepublic. this is the album with my songs know what you did in the dark. album still slaps tho. fun fact they made a movie out of it which has elton john:
gateway song: alone together (top tier example of a 2013 pop song tbh. pop done wonderfully. wowzaz)
a fav that u should also listen to: where did the party go? (the bass… the synth… the delivery of the lyrics… this was the song that convinced me to relisten to save rock and roll and really get into it)
american beauty/american psycho — people call this one sports commercial/stadium rock music and honestly yeah. yeah. this one had not only centuries but immortals from the big hero six movie. i’m like split down the middle on this album because half i simply cannot care about but the other half goes really hard fav after fav so:
gateway song: fourth of july (*cackling* (this is the other song people heavily associate with mikey way) but seriously this one can wreck you)
a fav that u should also listen to: the kids aren’t alright (this one will wreck you. genuinely? lyrics of all time.)
mania — my fav ✨😌 though polarizing among fans because this album is the furthest from pop punk theyve ever gone; it’s experimental pop rock/electropop. but i love it to pieces its clear themes of changing yourself for better or worse and looking back at how things used to be and knowing that you’ve survived and redemption through love drive me insane. ough:
gateway song: the last of the real ones (a single. it bops and its lyrics are wonderful. the piano is iconic)
a fav that u should also listen to: sunshine riptide (SONG OF ALL TIME!!! idk if it’s still my fav but damn i love it so much. beach vibes. a summer song. banger hook. vocals that make me feral.)
so much (for) stardust — THE RETURN ALBUM! came out in march :D “a return to their roots” everyone says, mirroring folie in its rock/pop punk sounding base with funk, soul and even disco influences? insane. absolutely insane:
gateway song: hold me like a grudge (the funky bass is enough for me to die happy tbh this is such a silly bop. yeag this was the song with the lyric fanfic writers were clamouring over (“part time soulmate, full time problem”))
a fav that u should also listen to: what a time to be alive (they made a fucking earth wind and fire song about the fucking pandemic and it is kinda their best song ever)
#i mightve spent like an hour on this 💀#yeah.. i get like this on a daily basis…#i hope u find stuff u like!! they have something for everyone according to pot#you don't don't know you're a legend
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Fire and Steel (Speedrunning Therapy) Part 2
Content warning for some mild suggestive themes. Remember that collaboration with @drabbleitout I posted in May? Well, I finally wrote part 2! Here’s the link to part 1. This one is super long at about 7,500 words, but it’s a lot of fun! Tagging: @ratracechronicler, @maple-writes, and @pen-of-roses!
Beau moved to the front, and I stiffened a little and watched to see where they took me, but they took me where they said they would. An official looking building that was totally a police station. Fuck, I was still way too nervous. These places always meant trouble.
Once he parked, Garnet got out and opened the door for me. I shuffled out, my eyes darting everywhere. There were plenty of places to run, just in case, but Beau would catch up easily. And I wasn’t sure if they were bad, but these places always put me on edge. Garnet looked around and then back at me. “Hey, one thing before we go in here. Let’s not mention the fire stuff to anyone else just yet. Alright?”
I wouldn’t have anyway. I nodded. “I don’t want to show that off either.” I looked back at the police station and flinched. I hated places like these.
Garnet led the way in, scanning a wristband to open the door. People were chatting as we walked along the carpeted floor, and we passed offices, and Garnet pointed out one of them. “That’s Chief Thatcher, let’s just hurry on past here.” I kept my head down as he nudged me forward.
“Garnet.” I froze when the man spoke from inside the office. Shit.
“Dammit. Beau, take her on in,” he whispered and walked into the office.
Beau kept me walking as the man kept speaking. “What is about another incident report?”
We left that conversation behind, instead walking through a room with glass for walls, and then to an office room with cubicles and everything. Beau stopped and looked around before walking again. “Over here, come meet Valetta.” I just nodded and followed him, trying not to look too suspicious, but I still hunched a little, noting any exits.
He led me through the room, and someone was throwing a ball against the wall of his cubicle. He froze when we walked past but then relaxed and gave me a peace sign. Wow. This was so different.
The person Beau was showing me to had tons of computers on her desk. She was sitting cross legged in her chair, staring at tone of the computers and chewing on her lip piercings. Once we approached, she looked up and smiled. She had short, black hair and brown skin and, shit, she was my type. I blushed immediately.
“Bo-bo, how’s it goin’? You finally push Garnet into traffic? Good for you.” She snickered, sitting back as her eyes flitted towards me. “Oh, shit, sorry. I didn’t see your friend. Hey! Love your hair. That color’s gorgeous.” She leaned back in her chair and held out her hand.
My cheeks were burning. She was so cool and pretty and…wow. I hesitated but shook her hand. “Th…thank you. You’re…so pretty.”
Valetta clicked her tongue. “Stop, you’re going to give me a condition. You’re one to talk.” She looked me up and down and fiddled with one of her ear piercings.
“Chess, this is Valetta. She’s our squad’s explosives expert, and part time cybersecurity operator,” Beau said.
“That’s suit and tie speak for I blow up bombs and hack servers.” Valetta winked.
“And this is Chess. She, uh…she’s a friend of mine. I wanted to show her around, she’s new in town.”
“Well I’m glad even with Garnet around you can make friends. Maybe we can all go out of drinks later. How long are you in town?”
As long as I could. I didn’t want to go back to my own world. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m here a few weeks, maybe longer. I like travelling. But drinks sound lovely.” I ducked my head. Damn, I sounded like a dumbass.
“Oh no, Amor, I told you if you want to keep friends, you better keep them away from her.” I looked over at the other person walking up, and…well, fuck. Was everyone on this world gorgeous? I blushed more as the lady walked up. She had long, black hair; tan skin; and brown eyes. And she was so tall. Shit.
“Ms. Valedictorian,” Valetta bowed her head. “This is Beau’s new friend, Chess.”
“Ooh, what a cool name.” I blushed more at her words.
“Lora is the squad’s mom.”
“No, I’m not.”
“Reach in your pocket, I bet you’ve got like a cereal bar or something in there right now. Go on. Let’s see.” Valetta sat up straighter, and Lora checked her pockets and found some kind of food bar. “Called it. Squad mom. Her and Ives always have snacks.”
“Lora helps with crisis operations,” Beau said. “Negotiations, cases that revolve around mental health, or anyone who wants to harm themselves. She’s very good at her job. She does take care of all of us.”
My stomach growled as I glanced at the bar. “It’s nice to meet you. You’re so cool.”
“Beau, I thought we agreed low profile.” Garnet walked up, glaring at Lora. “Not bring her out on parade.”
“Don’t worry, Garnet, we’re all still aware you’re an asshole,” Lora muttered.
“Sharing is caring, G.” Valetta leaned on her desk, propping her head in her hand and grinning. I blushed more. “And, apparently, Beau has much better taste in friends than you.”
“Yeah. Great. Thanks. Glad you’re getting along so swimmingly. Look, we’re still on shift, and Chess might need to hang out for now.”
“You look like you haven’t eaten, do you feel alright? Fevered? Tired? Here, would you like a snack?” Lora checked the bar before she handed it to me. My stomach growled again.
“See, told you. Congrats, you’re adopted now,” Valetta said.
I took the bar. “Thank you. You’re all so kind.” I couldn’t believe how kind they all were. I had never thought I would meet people who were so nice. Shit, the walls felt like they were closing in around her still. And Lora had mentioned being fevered. Could she tell that I was warmer than a normal person? “I’m fine other than being hungry.” I tried to smile, but I was feeling suffocated. I hated being here, even though the people were so nice.
“Why don’t you just ask Captain to let you off for the day,” Valetta said. “We’re full staffed.” She grinned. “Might be a good idea with how heated the Chief is with you.”
“I’m sure he will, especially since Beau has a friend in town.” Lora smiled at Beau and Garnet. “She’s probably exhausted from the trip.”
“Yeah, let her go rest so maybe later we can hang out.”
They kept discussing, but Beau looked over at me and leaned closer to whisper. “Would you like to get something to drink from the breakroom, or maybe step out for air?”
I blinked and flinched. He could tell I was kind of panicking that easily? But I didn’t want to leave. They were really nice. All of them. And they were all so pretty. I was fucking hopeless. “I’m fine. I just don’t like these places.”
He smiled and nodded. “I can tell. Your blood pressure is up. But we don’t want to leave you alone, especially in a place you aren’t familiar with. Our job is to look out for people, make sure they’re safe. What usually makes you feel safe?”
Wow. They certainly weren’t like the cops back home. But…well, when was the last time I had even felt safe? I frowned and tilted my head. “Nothing I know of really.”
“Does staying with someone, going back to work with us, or going with us to Garnet’s sound better? What are you most comfortable with?”
“I don’t want to be in the way. What’s the best for you?” I hesitated. I liked hanging out with Valetta too. And I’d be in the way with them. “I won’t take you away from work. If anything, probably staying here with someone.” My cheeks burned, thinking about staying near Valetta for a while.
“You’re not at all in the way, Chess. And believe me, Lora and Valetta will take great care of you. I promise.” He turned and grabbed Garnet’s sleeve. “I think it might be best if Chess waits here for us. It won’t be long, and we won’t be far. Are you two going to be here?”
“Oh yeah,” Valetta sputtered, gesturing at her computers. “I’ve got all this code to go through.”
“I’ll be here too,” Lora said. “It’s paperwork day.”
“And I’m here!” someone else said.
“Couldn’t miss you, Mid,” Valetta said. “I’d be happy to hang out with her in the meantime. Doubt she wants to go sit out there in rush hour with you two anyway.”
My cheeks burned worse. It would certainly be nice to hang out with Valetta. She was so cool. “Thank you. I’ll be happy to hang out with you.” I nibbled at the bar, not able to meet anyone’s eyes. The walls didn’t seem to be closing in anymore. But I didn’t feel comfortable yet.
“If you need us, for any reason, pick up any of the desk phones. They’re all automated and can reach us by name.” Beau nodded.
“I’m serious, V,” Garnet whispered to Valetta, but I could still hear him. “Take care of her.”
“I’m not a teenager babysitting a toddler.” She scowled. Garnet whispered something else I couldn’t hear, and her scowl faded. “Okay, okay, I get it. You’re soft.” She grinned as he flipped her off.
“C’mon, Beau, let’s go. Chess, anything you need, okay?” He held his hand up to his ear to look like a phone before he walked off, with Beau waving as he followed him.
“Here, have a seat and make yourself comfortable.” Lora pulled up a chair, and I sat down gratefully. “Let us know if you need anything. There’s water, hot tea, and coffee in the breakroom if you like.”
“Coffee is garbage here, just to warn you,” Valetta mumbled. She looked back at her screen, but then her eyes turned back to the door, and I looked over too to see someone standing there with a…what kind of animal was that? “Eee! Niner, baby!” The animal was about waist height (but the man in the door was super fucking tall, so the animal was actually thigh height for him), it had black and brown mottled fir, pointy ears, and a long…snout? It was beautiful!!! “Can you send her into freerange mode?”
The man (which now that I looked at him, my cheeks burned all over again; he was gorgeous) looked down at…Niner? She ran towards Valetta, expertly avoiding the desks. I stared at Niner as Valetta rolled back her chair with a screech and caught Niner, petting her as she leaned against Valetta. She was so beautiful. I wanted to pet her. Could I?
Valetta was smiling. “There she is! She’s a good girl! Has Ives been cooping you up all day?” She laughed, looking up at me as I kept staring at her. “Do you like dogs? Ever seen a Synthetic dog? Amazing. They don’t shed.”
So, she was called a dog! Dogs were the best! I reached out and hesitantly petted her, and she was so soft! I froze, probably looking like a dumbass as I grinned and stared before I petted her even more. This was the best day ever. “What’s a dog? She’s beautiful, though.”
“You’ve…you’ve never seen a dog? Oh man, they’re great. They’re little four legged doofuses that are just as excited to see you as you are to see them. Niner is Synthetic, of course, like Beau and Ives, but she’s clearly still dog coded.” Valetta took Niner’s head in her hands and smooshed her snout and petted up her ears. Amazing! She was ok with that! “At least, when Ives doesn’t have her working, which is like all the time.”
Valetta stopped petting Niner, and she turned her attention to me, and it was an even better day! She moved over to sit between my feet, and I made sure to pet her even more. Her head was even softer than her back! She was so amazing and beautiful! I grinned. “Oh, she’s amazing! I love her!”
I didn’t even notice the man walk over until he spoke. “She likes you too.” I looked up as I kept petting her. She liked me? It was an even better day! He looked more serious than Beau, with a stiff posture and a neutral expression. His eyes seemed to drill right through me. But I didn’t feel uncomfortable at his stare. It lacked the lust and maliciousness other people directed toward me. And did I mention he was gorgeous? He didn’t get too close, so that made me feel even more comfortable. “I don’t believe I’ve seen you before. Are you a new team member?”
“Actually, this is your brother’s friend.” Valetta smiled, and his eyebrows rose. “And you were worried he’d be the odd man out.” She looked at me. “They’re unofficial brothers. This is Ives, the older brother of Station Six. Best marksman and breaching operative. He, uh, he handles the real ugly stuff.”
“A pleasure to meet you.” He nodded at me.
He had to see how red my cheeks were, but I still looked up at him. “It’s nice to meet you. My name’s Chess. Your dog is so sweet.” I started rubbing her ears, and she grumbled happily, at least she sounded happy.
“Chess. We’re glad to have you here. And I’m glad you like Niner as well, she’s very important to me.” He paused, going completely still. “I was on my way to kennel her for the rest of the day. Would you like me to leave her here with you? I can come back to get her later.”
“Works for me,” Valetta said. “The more the merrier. I really don’t want to work on this.”
He looked over at me, and I just realized how blue his eyes were. Fuck. He was way too pretty. My cheeks got hotter, and I couldn’t speak for a bit. Both because of him and because I’d be able to stay with Niner. I nodded, and my voice cracked. “I would like that very much.”
“Ives?” An older man stood at the door, carrying a handheld computer, I supposed. He looked like a bastard. “We need to complete diagnostics before we run behind.” He looked up and waved to the rest of the room, but Valetta scowled at him.
What did diagnostics mean? Was he going to do something to Ives? I started to push myself up and ask what the fuck he was doing when Ives calmly turned and answered. “I’m on my way.” He turned back to me as I sank back into the chair, and he nodded. “I have an appointment with Auditors, but I’ll be back for Niner once I’ve finished. Again, it was a pleasure to meet you, Chess.” He turned and followed the man out of sight.
“Hate those fuckers,” Valetta scoffed, still glaring after them. “They treat Beau and Ives like garbage.”
Oh, so I would have to punch them. I kept petting Niner and glanced over at Valetta, and shit, she was gorgeous too. My cheeks heated up worse again. “Who are they, and why are they mean to Beau and Ives?” Beau and Ives had been nice to me, so it was ridiculous that someone would treat them badly.
“That was an Auditor, they’re like…software engineers. And to them, Beau and Ives are just big computers. Treat them like science experiments or a convenience.” Oh, so I would destroy them instead. Got it. I had been treated like an experiment for my prosthetics, and no one should be treated like that. “They’re number people.” She chewed on her lip piercing, took a deep breath, and released it in a huff. She leaned over her desk, closer to me, to whisper. “When he first got here, I thought he was the best looking guy, and guys aren’t even my drink of choice.” She winked and clicked her tongue, and my cheeks got hotter somehow. Both the comment about Ives and Valetta’s implication. “You’ve got brownie points with him though. He must like you to leave Niner with you. Way to go, chick!” She offered a hand for a high five.
I had never high fived before, at least not that I remembered, but I high fived her, and warmth bloomed in my chest. These people were so amazing and nice. I looked back to where the Auditor had been, though, and I tensed. “I hate them already.”
“We are gonna be great friends.” Wait, she wanted to be friends? That…that sounded nice. I had never thought I could be friends with someone. But before I could respond, she continued. “I noticed you’ve got a prosthetic. Is it heavy? Mine always feel heavy.” She moved back and kicked her heel up onto her desk. She rolled up her pant leg to show off a beautiful prosthetic. It was hollow with a web-like structure. “These see-through ones are the only ones light enough. You ever have that problem?”
My prosthetics had never felt too heavy, fortunately, but I wished I could get prosthetics like hers. “That one’s lovely. I think mine are pretty lightweight, but even if they weren’t, I wouldn’t be able to change them. If I could, I’d probably have something like yours.”
“Can’t change them…? Oh shit, man, I’m sorry. I didn’t even think how serious it might be. I was actually kinda admiring the work of your hand there.” I immediately thought of a flirt and my cheeks got hotter. “Like, I hope this isn’t weird, but everyone has all these modern, minimalistic designs. And yours is, well, badass, really.” She glanced down at her hand, but it almost looked like she was blushing too. “Sorry, that was probably weird. I meant it as a compliment. I should probably close my mouth and get back to work.”
I moved my prosthetic hand so she could see it better. “I don’t think that was weird. Your leg prosthetic is badass too. I like talking to you.” Fuck. Why was I being so awkward? I was usually smoother than this!
“Oh, thanks.” She laughed nervously. “Glad I didn’t completely fuck that up. I am one of the worst conversationalists ever. That’s why they sit me back here. I’m used to dealing with explosives, not people. But, you know, I like talking to you too. You’re sharp. And anyone who instantly hates Auditors is good in my book.”
“Thank you. And could you tell me more about what you do? Your job sounds amazing and so important.” I leaned a little closer, my cheeks still burning, as I petted Niner. She had set her head on my lap, and it was truly the best day ever. But my eyes wandered to Valetta’s lips, and I had to look away quickly. Fuck.
“Oh, sure. Mostly? It’s this, picking apart suspected servers or blockchains for the detectives upstairs. They see this and go dizzy.” She tapped something on the keyboard. And I was dizzy looking at this too. “My real paycheck comes from bomb threats. Not many of them -which is a good thing. And usually it’s little pipe bombs. Nothing crazy. Did get in a bad situation a few years ago. The little disposal rover didn’t see a trip line. Thankfully, Ives was there. Threw me down and kept the blast from turning my insides to jam.”
She paused. “But pretty much it’s memory and chemical reactions.” She rolled up a sleeve, and I smiled at the tattoos. I had always wanted a tattoo. They looked like different structures. “Knowing how to disable different kinds of explosives. What wires to cut. How to corrode a fuse. That sort of thing. Ives could probably do that part of the job for me, but, I’ve got better hands for it.” She smiled, her face scrunching, and she giggled. “And what about you? You seem like you’d have an interesting job.”
“That’s amazing. You must be very brave. And, I just pick up odd jobs wherever I go. So, not that interesting. But I’ve travelled a lot. I don’t like staying in one place for too long.” I hadn’t actually been able to ever get a job because of how people saw me.
“I’m a little bit of an adrenaline junkie, so I don’t know if you’d call it bravery. But, aw, man, I’ve always wanted to travel! I bet you’ve seen all kinds of places, done all sorts of things.” She glanced over at me. “I’ve always been too scared to pick up and go. Like, what if you can’t make it where you go next? If anyone’s the brave one, it’s you.”
I didn’t know about that. I was just running away and hiding. I didn’t really have a choice. My expression fell. I nodded. “Yes, I’ve seen a lot.” Which wasn’t always a good thing. “And I’m not brave. Not really.”
“Not really?” Valetta turned back to me, and Niner leaned more on me. “C’mon, don’t sell yourself short. It takes a lot of guts to be out on your own, especially traveling. There’s no way I could do it -I’ll tell you that much.”
I shook my head, petting Niner more. She was so soft. “I don’t have a choice. So, it’s not bravery.”
Valetta frowned, watching me before glancing around the office. She leaned closer slowly and dropped her voice to a whisper. “Are you in danger? Is someone stalking you?”
I blinked. Huh? Was that what happened when someone stalked another person here? I shook my head. “It’s nothing like that.” I could take care of a stalker on my own. I’d had to before.
She still watched me carefully. “What did you mean by you didn’t have a choice? Is someone trying to hurt you?”
Well, that was the reason I had to keep travelling. And I didn’t want to lie too much. “Something like that.”
“If you recognize someone who’s trying to hurt you, you’ll tell me right?” She glanced at the door, and she shifted to put her pistol from her hip to the desk. “You don’t worry about a thing, sweetheart. They’re not gonna get you here. Not brave, my ass.” She grinned.
My cheeks heated up again, but I wasn’t brave. “Thank you. You’re amazing.”
“Hey, I’m just doing my job, and doesn’t hurt to look after a pretty girl either, huh?” She laughed as she blushed too. She looked back at her computer. “I should seriously ask you if you’d like to file a report on whoever’s trying to make your life a nightmare. I can get Lora over, she does that.”
I bit my lip, my cheeks burning worse. “No thanks. That wouldn’t work anyway.”
“Alright, but if you change your mind let us know, that’s what we’re here for.”
“Hey,” the guy who had been bouncing the ball spoke up. He leaned around the wall to look at us. “How come she gets to play with Niner? I never get to play with Niner.”
“Because you tried to feed Niner a gas station burrito last time you were around her for five seconds.” Valetta peered over her computers. “That and you haven’t finished your quarter reports. Which is what you’re supposed to be doing. Ives told me, specifically, that you shouldn’t be left alone with Niner. Chess here has actual self control.”
I laughed, rubbing Niner’s ears as Niner leaned more on me. This was so much better than the police on my world. “Thank you. I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Don’t let me talk your ear off, I’m bad about that.” She turned back to me, smiling. “You might be tired. Which, I do have a yoga mat back here if you want some place to lie down. The detectives have cots upstairs, but, I wouldn’t.” She grimaced. “I don’t think they’ve ever seen the inside of a washing machine.”
I shook my head. I was tired, but I couldn’t rest. “I’m fine. Not that tired. And I’d rather pet Niner. And I like listening to you talk. I’m sorry I’m not that talkative at the moment.”
“Oh, no worries. I figured your trip might have you worn down. Or after dealing with Garnet. I know he can be a handful.”
Lora sputtered loudly from her desk, and Valetta smirked. “Yeah, it’s not every day someone uses nice as a descriptor for Garnet. He’s usually a little difficult to get along with. But since he’s looking out for you, I know you’re legit.”
But…Garnet was so kind. He hadn’t cared about my prosthetics, he hadn’t been pissed when I had kicked him to try and escape, and he had bought a jacket for me. He was one of the nicest people I had met. Lora spoke up before I could say anything. “Must be because she’s Beau’s friend. He’s having to play nice after his suspension.”
“Maybe, but it’s because he’s got a soft spot for him.”
“No way, Garnet hates his guts.”
“I’m just sayin’.” Valetta shrugged. “Garnet and I used to not get along. How many fights did we get in? Besides, maybe it’s just because Chess is such a sweetie.”
I ducked my head, flustered. “I don’t know about that…”
“You leave her alone,” Lora scolded but then laughed. “You and Garnet fought because you’re too much alike. Chess has been here half an hour and you’re already overwhelming her.”
“Hey, this is a No Mom Zone. We’re having a friendly chat. Stop trying to steal my friend.”
I smiled, but then I froze as the words sank in. Friend? Could I really have a friend? “Wait, friend?” I looked up at her and tilted my head. Did she really feel that way?
“Oh…oh! Sorry, that might be weird. I mean, I know we just met, but you’re super cool. I kinda consider you a friend. Is…is that too weird?” She grimaced.
Oh no, I had already fucked it up. I shook my head quickly. “No! It’s just…I don’t make friends easily.”
“R-really? You seem pretty good at it.” She smiled. “I mean, you might be a little quiet, but it’s not like you’re an asshole or anything.”
My cheeks burned. “Thank you. Once we’re somewhere else, I’ll probably be more talkative.” I just hated police stations.
“Secondary location,” Lora snickered.
Valetta blushed. “Does that mean you want to go with us after work? Grab something to eat, maybe some drinks?”
I nodded. “That sounds nice. I’d love to go! I don’t have any money though.”
“That’s okay, we invited you so we’ll cover it. Consider it like a welcome party! Have any favorite food or are you okay with bar food?”
Any food would be amazing! And really? Did they really want me to not pay them back? I didn’t get it. I shook my head. “As long as they have good drinks, I don’t care.”
“See, you get it.” Valetta snickered.
Niner perked up, and I looked down at her to make sure I hadn’t bothered her, but then I looked up, and Ives was back. My cheeks heated up more. He was so gorgeous. But something was wrong with his arm. He was fiddling with a panel or something, trying to get it back on his arm. Bastard Auditors.
“Ives, I know you don’t usually do dinner—” Lora said.
“Ives, dude, come to dinner. We’re having a welcome party for Chess,” Valetta said over Lora. He slowly looked from Lora to Valetta and then to me. “Just to socialize.”
“If you want,” Lora added.
I looked up, knowing he could see my blush. “I’d love for you to come. If you…if you want. And thank you for letting me hang out with Niner.” She was the best.
“If you’d like, I’d be happy to join, and thank you for watching her. I believe time spent not working is good to balance her abilities. She doesn’t get as much time as she should, so I appreciate the time you’ve spent with her.” His expression lost a little bit of the intensity.
“Everyone should be on their way back soon. It’s almost time to clock out, thankfully.” Lora sighed. Valetta got working on her computer. “I’m gonna text the boys and see if they’re game.”
I watched Ives. It was hard to read him, but I felt pretty comfortable around him. He seemed to be thoughtful and kind. He certainly cared for Niner. “She’s amazing. I’ll watch her again, if you’d like.”
“Of course, if you visit again and she isn’t on call that would be excellent. Will…will you be visiting again?” He stepped around Valetta’s desk, tapping her chair. She pointed something out as I was about to say something, so I stayed quiet as Ives looked over at what she was talking about.
He explained something and looked back at me. “I’m sorry. Will this be the only time you come by the station? I’m afraid I haven’t had the opportunity to meet you.”
“I don’t think so. I’ll be here for a while and as Beau’s…friend, I’d love to meet his other friends too. Make sure you’re treating him well.” I smiled. It had been hard to call Beau a friend, but it had felt nice.
He nodded, mouth curling in a faint smile. “I’m glad to know he has others looking out for him. And we’re happy to have you.”
“Aw, jeez-o.” Garnet entered with a grumble. He glared at Ives, edging around him to get to a desk. I frowned. Why did he not like Ives? Ives had been nice.
Beau followed Garnet in. “Hey, Chess!” He slowed a little, shoulders falling. “How was your day?”
I smiled at seeing both of them, though. “It was good! I got to pet Niner!”
Beau grinned, glancing at Valetta. “I’m glad you’re going out with us too. Garnet said he’d go.”
I smiled more. “That’s good! It’ll be nice.”
“Oh, okay, I see how it is,” another voice said. An older man entered, taking off his jacket. “We get plans and everyone wants to show up on time. Is that all it takes? But no food and drink and everyone wants to be ten minutes late.” He chuckled, stopping when his eyes landed on me. I stiffened a bit. He seemed to have more power than the others, with what his jacket looked like. “And you must be the lady of the hour. Hope you haven’t been overwhelmed with the squad. I’m Captain Ryker, Beau mentioned you were in town. I see Ives is showing off.” He walked over and held out a hand.
I shook his hand, trying not to hesitate. He seemed nice enough. “It’s nice to meet you. My name’s Chess.”
“Nice to meet you, Chess. I’ve been working with Beau for a few months, as his mentor, and I’m so grateful he’s out making friends. How did we want to ride?”
“Garnet, you driving?” Valetta stood, shutting down her computers. “I’ll go with you guys if you want.”
“I’ll go with Ives and Ryker.” Lora stood too. “Midland, you going?”
Beau leaned closer to me as they talked, so he could whisper. “Chess, did you want to go with us?”
I nodded. I needed to figure out how honest I could be with the others, so maybe I could talk to Beau about that.
The others figured everything out, and I followed them to the car. Garnet drove, with Valetta riding up front. So, I’d have a good chance to ask Beau what to admit to. Beau kept glancing at me, looking like he was about to start fussing over everything.
Garnet also looked back to check. “Everything okay? Comfy?”
I had breathed a sigh of relief when we left the building, so everything was great. I nodded. “I’m doing good.” Once Garnet looked back ahead, I looked over at Beau to whisper. “I have a few questions about the story. Should I just pretend like my life is normal? Like, happy?” Valetta already thought someone was trying to hurt me, so I hadn’t done a good job yet.
He looked thoughtful. “I don’t think you should pretend that you’re happy if you aren’t. And a possible inebriated slip may complicate things -not to assume that would happen, but just in case. I don’t think sharing with them would result in any danger. At least, as much as you’re willing to share.” He smiled. “I know we’re still very much strangers, and you’re entirely out of your comfort zone, but I promise you, this is my family, and they’re going to want to help you.” He patted my arm. “Although, I don’t want to pressure you. You’re not obligated to share anything you don’t want to. I’m sure they won’t pry.”
I scoffed at the inebriated comment. “I’m not a lightweight, and I don’t let myself get drunk.” I nodded and softened when I registered he had touched me. In a friendly way. I was so used to people touching me in a hateful or lustful way, but this was just a friendly touch. “And, um, okay. I’m fine sharing if they ask. I just didn’t want to tell them what was going on if that wasn’t a good idea.”
“Ryker may have the most questions, just from being ex-military he tends to…be that way. You don’t have to worry about Garnet, we discussed things earlier. Valetta probably won’t believe you, that it’s some big prank we’ve set her up for. Lora may be concerned but she’ll listen when we vouch for you. And, don’t panic, but I think Ives already knows.” I honestly was surprised the others weren’t confused about some of the questions I had already asked, so I wasn’t surprised Ives knew. Beau rushed to continue, tapping the side of his head. “He messaged me about it, right before we left. He noticed like I did the unknown origin of your prosthetics. I didn’t tell him yet. I didn’t feel like it was my place. But I did tell him everything was alright, that we could explain later. Like me, he’s going to completely believe you.”
I nodded. And I should tell him about my magic. “Okay. Sounds good. Also, I know you mentioned the fire. Well, it’s magic I got from these prosthetics, and it hurts me. The coughing up smoke comes from what I think is a magic fire in my lungs that flares up when I’m stressed. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I’m not lying. Also, if I feel warmer than I should, that’s normal from the magic too.”
“I…well, I was worried you may be running a fever.” He blinked multiple times. “I admit, if I hadn’t seen the smoke myself, I don’t know that I’d believe you. It…does it hurt all of the time? Right now, are you hurting?”
“My throat’s basically burned and scarred, so that’s always uncomfortable, but it only really hurts when I’m stressed and the fire flares up.”
“Then I’ll try and make sure there’s nothing for you to worry about. I don’t want anything to cause you pain.” He hesitated, eyebrows furrowed. “I may be overstepping, and if you don’t want to answer that’s okay. But…if the prosthetics give you the magic that hurts you, did you…choose it? Did you know it would affect you this way?”
I grimaced. “I don’t actually remember, but these are from some experiments, and any other victims I heard about said they were forced into it. And I’m terrified of doctors and scientists and needles, so I don’t think I chose these. Can’t get rid of them either.”
Beau took longer to respond. “I’m sorry. I know it may not be my place, but I’m sorry you were subjected to that. In a fraction of a way I understand what you mean. Sometimes appointments with Auditors feel like an experiment. But is it due to medical reasons they can’t be changed, or does it have something to do with the magic?”
Those fucking Auditors. “I’m going to have to punch them, won’t I?” My voice shook with anger, so I had to pause to compose myself. “The prosthetics are fused with my skin, and my skin has somehow been made to be invulnerable to getting cut around the prosthetics. And that goes up my skin until it would kill me to cut off the prosthetics.”
Beau laughed, fidgeting at his zipper on his jacket. “You sound like Garnet. No, no you won’t have to punch them. It’s routine maintenance. But…maybe if tonight goes as well as I’m predicting, we could run things by Mikki. She’s like our version of a medic. She can be a little blunt, but she’s nice. There’s a chance she may think of something. At least be able to help with any discomfort.” He frowned, shaking his head. “I just don’t understand why someone would do such. Against your will.”
Oh, it made perfect sense to me. But I nodded to answer his first idea about Mikki. “Thank you. I would like that.” And people were always like that. I honestly wasn’t surprised at all. I sighed. “It’s because they want power and to hurt people. There’s not much to it, honestly. Just people flaunting power over others as usual. But…you’ve been so nice, and I don’t get it, but thank you. Is there any way I can pay you back?” There was no way he wanted to do all this for free.
“I’ve heard of people being that way but that’s terrible. To that extreme. It reminds me of some of the wars the others have talked about from before. But, oh, no, you don’t need to pay me. If anyone deserves people being nice to them, it’s you. With everything you’ve been through, this is the least I can do for you.”
Huh? I frowned. “I don’t deserve anything. I’m…not a good person.”
“Why?” Beau tilted his head. “Have you done something bad? And if you mean stealing pocket change I can go ahead and assure you that doesn’t make you a bad person. You were doing it as a means of survival. Not greed or for power, like those people.” He motioned at my prosthetic arm.
I looked away from him. He didn’t understand. “I’ve stolen and killed, and yeah, it was to survive. But I’m worthless. I can’t help you at all. No one cares about me except for how attractive I am to them, and I’ve used that to my advantage to have someone to sleep next to instead of a dark alley. I have nothing really to offer, and maybe they’re all right and I am a monster and I deserve to be hurt.” I gritted my teeth. Beau was kind, but it didn’t make sense for people to be kind to me. It made much more sense for people to hate me and hurt me.
Beau hesitated, taking my hand carefully, and I didn’t pull away. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that being alive is the hardest thing someone can do, and it’s apparent you haven’t had an easy road, Chess. I believe you. You say you’ve done what you have to survive, and I know if that was a lie things would have ended very differently. If you were a bad person.”
I…I didn’t understand. He leaned down, looking small, keeping his voice to a whisper. “I wasn’t there to witness those things, and even if I was it isn’t my place to be the judge of that. All I know is what I’ve seen today. And I haven’t seen a monster. I’ve seen a rightfully terrified woman who’s been thrown into a strange world. I’ve seen a strong but very stubborn woman holding a brave face. And I’ve seen a very kind woman making friends and giving very satisfying puppy ear rubs -so I’m told.” He smiled. “Those are all very priceless things you have to offer.
“And you have helped. Everyone is excited to get together and meet you. We care. I’ll have you know Garnet worried about you all day. And Lora knew you were hungry. And Valetta wanted you to come spend time with us. And Niner isn’t allowed to be left with just anyone. Ives is very particular. So, please don’t think we don’t care. You’re new, and you have an important story, and we’re glad you’re here!”
I couldn’t look right at him, trying to process everything. There were good people in the world, and I had stumbled across the nicest people ever. Tears blurred my vision, and I tried to blink them away. “I…I don’t understand. I’m sorry.” My voice cracked, and the tears fell. Shit. I held tightly to his hand, using it to help ground my thoughts as they threatened to spiral out of control.
He held firmly to my hand. “It’s okay, please don’t apologize. It doesn’t have to make sense right now. But I promise, you’re doing wonderful. And you’re probably really hungry. You’ve barely had anything to eat…I hope you like the food. I can’t say what it’s like.” He laughed. “But I’m going to be right here, the whole time. So if you get overwhelmed, you just tell me. Okay?”
I sniffled and wiped furiously at my eyes. I couldn’t wrap my head around such kindness, so a good distraction would be to flirt. He was attractive anyway. I nodded and laughed. “Like my knight in shining armor? You’ll take me away to a private room and take care of me?”
“Of course, we can…” I saw the exact moment that he realized what I really meant. The shock on his face was priceless. “Well, we might, that is. I don’t know that there is a private room. But I’ll be sure to take care of you.” Amazing. He stuttered to continue. “T-to make sure you’re alright. Not overwhelmed, that is.”
This was nice. I leaned a little closer to him, smiling wider. “Such a gentleman. I certainly won’t get overwhelmed with you.”
He seemed unsure as he jumped, his shoulder bumping against the seat. He didn’t speak for a bit, just staring. What was he seeing? My amazing beauty? How attractive I was? “You have really pretty eyes. You remind me of an orchid.”
The honesty was cute. I smiled a little more genuinely, less sexily. “Thank you. At least I think. What’s an orchid?”
“You’re welcome. It’s a…well, it’s a beautiful flower. There’s some in one of the market windows they sell. Your eyes are almost the same color.” He tilted his head and leaned forward to kiss my cheek. It was such a soft and sweet touch that my cheeks actually heated up. “I’m sorry if that wasn’t right.” He sat back. “I admit I’m not very good at flirting and I’m very new to emotions, but I’m having a hard time describing what I mean. I want you to be my friend, but you looked really happy just now, and it made me happy…I probably shouldn’t have done that, though.”
I stuttered before I could get the words out. He wasn’t repulsed by her? He wanted to be friends? “I…I don’t mind. Fuck. Now I’m confused all over again.” I paused. That sounded bad. “Not…not in a bad way though! And I just kind of flirt regularly, so you can take it as platonic and just having fun, or as romantic, whatever you’d prefer!”
“I hope I didn’t make things worse or complicated. I…” He glanced up front. “Maybe platonic? Like I said, I’m very new to…this. And I might be trying to figure out if I feel this for someone.” He fidgeted with his jacket. Ok. We had to have some private flirting sessions to help him figure this out and flirt with whoever it was he was interested in. “But you seem very comfortable and relaxed. Like it’s freeing. I feel like you’re more yourself and it makes me happy that you’re feeling better.”
I nodded. “Got it. Do you want me to just not flirt at all, even platonically?”
“No, no, I think it’s okay. It can help me learn and know if…you know, uh, but I did mean it -that you’re pretty. And I’m glad to see you happier.”
I nodded again. I would help him figure it all out. “Got it. And…thanks. You’re handsome too.”
“Thank you.” He smiled, but I noticed that the car was slowing down, so I looked out the window to see a bar with a seating area outside on the roof. This was amazing! And I didn’t have to worry about getting food. This would be good. I’d see how it went to see if I wanted to tell the others where I came from.
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why blupjeans deserves the win:
-lup is canonically a trans woman and it was handled so well and so respectfully.
-which normally cheering something on just because it's Representation™ is meh but. it's just so heartwarming to see a trans person be valued and loved so unconditionally. in this case, i'm referring to the romantic love between her and barry, but also the love that other characters and the creators themselves and the fanbase have for her
-they're outwardly the "the coolest woman imagineable and Literally Just Some Guy" trope but the good flavour of that trope, where he knows full well she's the coolest woman imagineable and is head over heels in love with her, and she's like "he's not *just* some guy he's *my* some guy"
-barry is the Wife Guy of all time
-he loved her so strongly that his title in a prophesy about their group was literally "the lover"
-you like slowburns? these two took like FIFTY YEARS (whilst trapped in a sort of time loop/cycle of repeated apocalypses) to get together officially
-and the scene where they finally got together? beautiful. immaculate. they composed and performed a beautiful duet together commemorating their love
-the scene included a monologue that made me cry once:
"Our capacity for love increases with each person we cross paths with throughout our lives, and with each moment we spend with those people. But, too often we neglect that part of ourselves in favor of others. And by the time we realize just how important that is, we find ourselves with fewer folks around to practice with. But the seven of you have something that nobody else ever had: time. All the time in the world. Time enough to grow indescribably close. Time enough to- to learn how to care for each other, how to allow yourselves to be cared for. And in the case of Barry and Lup, time enough to fall deeply and truly in love. "
-watch this scene if you're curious and willing to listen to 6 spoiler-filled minutes of a podcast you've presumably not listened to before https://youtu.be/R6Ze7EFY8Wo
-on top of their "badass arsonist gf x weird nerd bf" thing, they ALSO have a "mad scientist wizard gf x mad scientist wizard bf" thing goin on. she's a nerdy coolgirl and he's the world's weirdest normalguy. there's Layers.
-these two decided to skip the normal people marriage step and instead elected to become liches together (as a tool to help them save the world but also possibly additionally as a failsafe for after they break the time loop thing, because he's a human and she's an elf who would outlive him by centuries otherwise)
-it was really sweet and they used their love for each other (as well as their bonds with their family) as anchors to keep their souls intact instead of becoming corrupted by the ritual
-as someone in the tags put it: they put the romance in necromancy
-at the end of the story they become immortal reapers for the goddess of death
-(and yet somehow they still retain their connecticut clark and malfina type vibes throughout all this)
-she goes missing for a DECADE and gets her soul sealed away and he never gives up on trying to find her
-he chooses to DIE (albeit kinda temporarily bc lich) instead of having his memories of her stolen away
-all the while, he clings to his love for her as a tether to keep his lich form stable as his family loses their memories of him and he faces extreme isolation and acute knowledge of the upcoming end of the world
-the first message lup manages to speak to her family while her soul is sealed away is a plea for them to trust barry
-there's a period of time between them being reunited where he has a body but she's still a ghostly lich and he offers to blow himself up just so he can hold her. then, after she gets her body back, one of the first things she says to him is "i'm gonna smooch your fuckin brains out". they are both so fucking Weird.
-but at the end of it all, they survived numerous apocalypses and years of separation and they manage to find a happy ending together and it's just so so sweet
#idk if this essay will convince ppl but idc i just need to gush about these two#because they wrecked me#i'm in the middle of my taz balance relisten and i am just going fucking BONKERS over So Many Things#taz#the adventure zone#long post#idk if anyone's even Reading All This actually#i'm just. they!!!#it's rare for my aroace ass to Feel Things over romantic ships but. they...#all the respect in the world for twiyor. my mutuals like them and i dig their fake dating coparenting deal#but come on. blupjeans.
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Over And Out (l.h)
End Up Here - Part 4
Pairing: Luke Hemmings x 5sos! Fem! Reader
Summary: A tour. A secret relationship. And rumors only grow...
Warnings: Angst, mild smut. Mentions of harassment, sexual harassment, sexual abuse, physical abuse, verbal abuse, creepy men, jealousy, alcohol, cheating, fighting, sexism, and many frustrations. Language and some grammatical errors (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)
Word Count: 10k
Author’s Note: this is the most frustrating thing I’ve ever written, I believe. Next part will be up on March 14th. Remember that Reblogs, Fedback, Comments and Likes are very important! You have no idea how much they help me ❤️ Hope you like it and Happy Reading 🦋🌻✨
My Materialist // wanna be part of my tag list?
Series Materialist || part 1 || part 2 || part 3
Liked by michaelclifford, 5sosfan4eva and 1,573 others
lukehemmings and away and away we go ✈️
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5sosfan4eva THEY ARE TOTALLY DATING
↪️ calumlovesash I hope they’re not 🤢 she was much better with Madden or Josh. At least they’re famous
yn5sos I’m changing seats with Michael
↪️ lukehemmings @yn5sos 🥺
*
@5sos EUROPE ARE YOU READY?!
“I can’t believe we’re already here!” Y/N cheered as they got to the hotel.
It’s been a month on the road already and they finally had a few days to rest before traveling to yet another destination. They had the idea of doing a tour to promote not only their new singles and tease the album release that’s bound to happen next year, and it ended up being one of the most incredible ideas they had after spending almost a year without doing shows.
They started with a small tour in Europe, then they will move on back home in Australia for a couple of shows, and then the big finale in the United States where most of their shows were already sold out. By that time, the fans would’ve already listened to the new songs and be even more hyped for the new album.
Luke was the newbie on tour, this not being the first time he traveled away from home, but the first time he did it with people he cared about. He was having the time of his life with Y/N, the boys, and their s.o. It all felt like a dream. He was actually living the life of a rockstar on his summer break, even if most of the things they did they had to keep it a secret.
When Y/N invited Luke on tour there was no way he would’ve said no to her - not just because he pretty much can’t say no to her, but that’s another story.
She said she wanted to take it slow and that was exactly what they were doing. They didn’t put a label on whatever they had going on, but rather they enjoyed the moment stealing kisses and nights whenever they could.
They would sneak out into each other's rooms late at night, longing to be closer. They would spend hours upon hours tangled in the sheets, loving each other and sharing whatever was on their minds at the time. Making those moments their own amid their borrowed time between destinations. A moment for the two of them.
Luke found it weird at the beginning; hiding their relationship from the world until it became official. But these last few months he could see a change in Y/N, she seemed happier, more open to talking about her feelings and her past. He understood that this was important to her, to live a normal life until she feels ready to share it.
If time is what she needed, time is what she’ll get.
The boys and their girlfriends were all supportive. They too understood the importance of keeping some things private as well as the changes in Y/N’s behavior. They were all happy to see their friend back, just in time for tour.
But it was almost impossible to control what was put in the media. The fans already know who Luke is and that he spends a lot of time with the members of their favorite band. They speculate about his relationship with Y/N, creating rumors that even though he wants to, he can’t confirm nor deny. And when it came to the media outlets, those were much, much worse.
They didn’t say much about him “The privilege of being normal” Said Calum once. But they did have a lot to say about Y/N…
“Y/N L/N is back at it again with a new man?!”
“No tears this time? Y/N L/N Caught smiling and getting cuddly with a member of her team! Can she mix work and pleasure?”
“Serial heartthrob Y/N L/N seen with other men while still refusing to talk about her most recent break-up? Sounds fishy to me!”
“What was she thinking?! Y/N L/N was spotted in an outing with his “new friend” wearing very thin shorts and a crop top. Not so family-friendly apparently”
Horrible things were written about her every day but she ignored them as if they didn’t exist. Luke wished he could do the same.
Every little article, tweet, or comment about Y/N made his blood boil. It was clear that they were completely made up to be some “big news” when the reality was far from that and they kept disrespecting them and their relationship even if it was still on the down-low.
But Luke could not stop reading them. It was addictive how he couldn’t resist clicking on her name every time it popped out, not because of some morbid reasoning behind it, but because those articles seemed to know more about Y/N than Luke himself. People kept talking about a past he didn’t know she had. Were those made up as well? Or are they based on reality? Would he be able to know the difference?
Truth was, he couldn’t. He loves Y/N blindly, he got to know her in one of the most genuine ways but it feels like that is not enough. It’s almost like she is living a secret life he doesn’t get to know.
He wonders when it will end. This seemingly permanent stage of seating on the sidewalk, waiting for the light to turn green so they could walk freely into their relationship. Where people will support them, respect her and let them be happy. But that could never happen when she’s the one who doesn’t want to move.
Luke respects that she is not ready to talk, as she said time and time again. But he just couldn’t comprehend how she, right now, could be so at peace while her name is thrown through the mud and back. Smiling with the boys as they take pictures for promo while management arranges the check-in. Does she not know what they are saying about her or she just accepts it without any retribution?
He was asking himself all these questions as he watched her so happy, his mind tormenting him with a dark cloud over their sunny day. He wants to protect her, but he doesn’t know how or if she would even let him.
And yes, maybe that was selfish of him. Banging on a closed-door with his heart in his hands. But what about the person with the key and the lock? Aren't they a little bit selfish too?
“Hey!” He heard Kat said as she sat beside him, nudging her shoulder against his.
Luke turned to her, his eyebrow still locked in a frown as he muttered a little “hey��
The blonde girl scrunched her nose at him “Yikes, what's happening that it has you all worked up, buddy?”
Luke pressed his lips on a thin line as his eyes traveled back at Y/N. She was laughing at something Ashton had said when she turned to look at him.
Y/N smiled, winking at him as she waved. Luke stared at her for a while, a small smile playing on his lips as he raised his hand in acknowledgment. He could feel his heart skipping a beat every time their eyes met, but the dark feelings in his mind made his expression turn sour the moment Y/N turned around again, something that didn’t go unnoticed by the girl sitting next to him.
“You read them again, didn’t you?” Kat asked, already knowing the answer just by looking at how his shoulders tensed the moment she asked it.
They were all aware of the tabloids and the stories, being a regular occurrence to them, but not for Luke. They all knew this was new to him as well and how overwhelming it might be. So they all tried to ground him as much as possible, not letting him get affected by it as he had before.
“Now why are they saying that?!” He spat as he threw his cellphone on the leather couch, calling the boy's attention.
It was a normal day at the studio. They were all getting lunch as they laid back in the break room while Y/N and their girls went out to get them coffee.
Calum was the first one to speak, confused by his friend's sudden outburst “Uh, what exactly? And who?”
“This!” He said, grabbing his phone and tossing it at Calum. The rest of the boys gathered around as Luke plopped himself down on the couch.
Ashton began to read out loud “Seeing the growing rumors of Y/N’s mystery man, here’s a list of every guy we wished would date her”
“Okay that’s fucked up,” Michael said, swallowing his food.
“It’s better than the last one…”
“What?!” Luke asked, outraged that there are worse things out there.
“Dude, chill,” Calum said, “We understand this is beyond fucked, especially now that you’re dating or whatever. But you getting this angry at it won’t solve anything”
“Won’t solve anything?!” He said in a loud tone “That’s my girl they’re talking about. My girl dating other guys while she’s with me!”
“But they don’t know that,” Michael argued.
Luke shook his head, taking his phone back from Calum’s hands as he started typing furiously.
“What are you doing?”
“What does it look like I’m doing?! Letting them know that they can go fuck themselves” Luke answered, eyes still on the phone, a second away from pressing send before Calum snatched his phone.
“No!” He said “You are not going to out your relationship without her consent!”
“But-“
“Plus, I already took care of it,” Ashton said, holding his phone up “I tweeted at them telling them how incredibly disrespectful they’re being, now the fans are onto them and I already messaged management to deal with it”
“And that’s it?” Luke’s eyes winded “That’s all you’re gonna do?”
“That’s all we can do right now,” Ashton said with a sigh, sitting next to it “We know these situations suck, they’re horrible and dehumanizing and we are glad more people are realizing just how shitty the media is. But if we respond to every rumor there is it’s going to be a never endless battle, it’s going to backfire. We know, we tried”
“But all the stories are aimed against her” Luke said, running a hand through his face with frustration clear in his eyes “She didn’t do anything wrong!”
“Why do you think that is?” Michael chimed in “Think about Taylor Swift, Katy Perry, Miley Cyrus, Britney Spears… They aim for women because they think are easy to kill”
“Which they’re not. It makes them stronger somehow. I wouldn’t have been able to handle it if I was them” Calum said “Women are stronger than you think when it comes to this, Y/N included”
“We’ve been living with this kind of shit show for years. We defended her with knives and teeth, dragging every single outlet that posted something against her. But that shit only made it worse for her”
“They loved the attention they were receiving” Ashton’s voices laid with sarcasm “Every interaction we had they profited from it, creating even more rumors, one worse than the other, just so they could have the clicks. Eventually, Y/N asked us to stop defending her publicly and she decided to ignore it altogether”
“But we still fight for her, though. We flag the post, demand they take it down, talk to PR and management for damage control, and even sue for defamation a couple of times. She’s never got to go through any of that on her own, we wouldn’t have allowed it”
“And what am I supposed to do, then?” Luke asked, a mix of frustration and desperation filled his voice “Just do nothing?”
“Be there for her” Calum answered like it was the most obvious thing in the world “Support her. Love her. Comfort her. Whatever she needs. She’s a strong woman, one of the strongest we know. But there will come a time when she will have to lean on someone, and you have to be there and ready for her. She trusts you. Don’t let her down”
Kath placed a hand on Luke’s shoulder, understanding the man’s pain.
“I just-“ He said with a sigh “She never reads them, you know? The articles. But I do, I can’t help it. They seem to know more about her than me and that’s just-“
“Fucked?”
“Yeah,” He said as he took a long breath “I don’t know… I’m trying. This is all very new to me and she’s a professional at dealing with this kind of shit. But at the same time, she never tells me anything, how she feels about them or if they’re real or not. It’s fucking me up”
Kat hummed “And I assume you don’t ask her about it either”
The girl crooked an eyebrow at Luke, seemingly seeing through him “I- I don’t want to push”
She sighed and patted his shoulder “Let me tell you something, Luke. From girlfriend of a celebrity to the boyfriend of a celebrity” She started, earning Luke’s complete attention “When I started dating Calum we decided to keep it private, out of the eyes of the media and even from some of his friends. It was good at the beginning, great even! But the heart is ambitious and it always ends up wanting more. We fought a lot during those times, part of us wanting to hold on to what we had but at the same time longing for some kind of freedom. In the end, we did end up going public, as you know. We endure a lot of hate, we still do. But we knew what we were up against, you’re still trying to figure that out. But I’m telling you to know there is something you’re lacking”
“And what is that?” Luke asked with curiosity.
“Communication” Kat smiled sweetly at him “How do you expect to reach a meeting point while you’re sitting here in your own dark cloud and she’s over there with no clue of what’s happening with you and vice versa?”
The blonde girl got up from her seat next to him, giving him one last piece of advice before walking towards Calum “Don’t give up before you try. No one said it was going to be easy but, it’s your choice to see if it’s worth it”
Luke watched her walk away, rousing her arms around Calum’s waist as she smiled sweetly at him, giving him a small peck. Luke smiled at their love.
He thought about their friends, how in love they are with their partners and how free they are to love publicly, facing the retaliations of being in the public eye. But they seemed happy, they were happy. And he realized he wanted that for him and Y/N.
His mind drifted off to the possibility of going public, cleaning the air once and for all. No more “mysterious guy” or “Y/N’s possible secret lover” he’d be Luke Hemmings, the proud boyfriend of singer Y/N L/N. They could be happier, free. They could fight those rumors together and face the stormy weather that would come. He’d defend her until the end of times, protecting her with his life and supporting her in everything she does. He wanted that for them. But it wasn’t his sole choice to make.
“Babe!” He heard Y/N call.
She was walking up to him, a playful smile on her face as the nickname rolled off her tongue. She was wearing one of his hoodies, making her look small as she approached him.
He noticed that her eyes were shining, lately, they always did and he couldn’t get enough of them. He could get lost in her eyes willingly, throwing away the map and making himself home.
He loved her. Oh, he was so in love with her he didn’t even know what to do. The more he thought about it, the more sure he was about wanting to love her freely. He just wished she thought about it too.
“I got our keys” She smiled, pulling two cards out of her back pocket.
“Oh?” Luke asked playfully with a grin drawn into his face “And where am I supposed to sleep this week?”
In order not to create any suspicion about their relationship, they decided that Luke will have his own hotel room on tour - even though everyone knows that’s not where he sleeps or where he wakes up in the mornings. Usually “Luke’s room” is used to store the extra luggage they carry.
Y/N fake pouted “Sadly, Mr. Hemmings. Your room is at the other end of the hall”
Luke gasped “That far away?! Is there any way I can be… closer?”
The girl bit her lip as she rounded her arm around his waist, standing on her tippy toes as she softly whispered in his ear “Let’s see what I can do about that, Sir”
Y/N giggled as she heard Luke let out a soft groan, pecking his cheek with a small kiss as she stood in front of him again “Baby, you’re going to be the death of me” He said, trying to get a hold of her by her waist. But she was quicker, swiftly moving a step back as she started walking towards the elevators. One last look over her shoulder got him grabbing their things as he followed her without any questions.
The elevator ride is quiet, the beating of their hearts being the soundtrack to their wait as they reached their floor. Y/N didn't look at him as she walked towards the door, unlocking it with one swift movement of the wrist and leaving it open for Luke to come in after her.
When he opened the door, she was nowhere in sight. He wondered if she hid somewhere, this not being the first time she would jump and scare the shit out of him. But then, his ears picked up a soft humming coming through the bathroom door, and with a devilish smile he let their luggage at the side of the closet, he locked the door and made his way to her.
Y/N was humming one of her favorite songs when Luke caught her reflection in the mirror but she was not looking at him. She was putting some lotion in her hands, fingers tracing up until her upper arm with barely-there touches.
“Remember we have a party in a couple of hours, Hemmings,” She said when she felt him getting closer “We should get ready soon” He just hummed in agreement, not really paying attention to her words.
Softly, he placed his hands on either side of her hips, pulling her closer to him. Y/N kept ignoring him as she dried the excess of product out of her hands and it wasn’t until Luke pushed away some of her hair and started kissing along her neck that she finally gave him a proper response to his action.
Luke smirked as he felt her let out a shaky breath as his lips traced the shell of her ear, kissing it softly before moving lower and lower, kissing and sucking on her skin as slow as he could, making her tremble under his touch.
“Luke,” She said, holding her breath as she felt his calloused hands travel under the hoodie she was wearing. His hoodie. The one that always smelt like him.
“Hmm?” He asked, not stopping his movements for a second.
“We- uhm” The girl stuttered in a whisper when his hands started touching her over her bra, softly rolling over the nipples and making them hard “We should - oh - we should start getting ready soon”
“We should, huh?” He asked, voice raspy and low “It will be rude to go a little bit late. Wouldn’t it?”
Y/N let out a sigh when his hands left her breasts, trying to regain her breath before she lost it all over again when his fingers started playing with the hem of her jeans.
His fingers wandered carefully, fiddling with the button and zipper until they weren’t an issue. His lips grazed her neck up and down, kissing it softly as his fingertips finally reached her center.
She let out a soft moan when she felt him over her panties, tracing her lips over them and feeling her arousal “I’m sure they could wait a little bit longer” He said as he pressed a finger to her clit over the fabric “We need to take care of a few problems before that, don’t you think?”
He pressed his hips onto her, a soft whimper escaping her mouth when she felt his growing erection against her.
“So wet for me, my love” He groaned as her hand flew to the top of his hair, trying to find balance as she tugged on his curls “Always so beautiful for me”
“Luke-“
He opened his eyes just in time to catch her staring at him through the mirror with a desperate look in her eyes. It took him less than a second to spin her around and press her against the countertop, ceasing his lips into her like she was his last meal on earth.
She tangled her hands behind his head, fingers deep into his hair as he grabbed her by the back of her thighs, easily lifting her off and taking her to the king-size bed where they made sure to lose track of time between kisses and moans as they satisfied their needs with each other, over and over again until they fell through the abyss of pleasure together, whispering sweet confessions as their breath went back to normal.
It was easy to say that they were the last ones to reach the lobby. What was hard for them to ignore was the knowing looks and teasing smiles from their friends that were waiting for them for a good amount of time.
“Don’t say anything” Y/N threatened Ashton as he opened his mouth. But he just laughed
“If you want Luke to walk around with his fly open then sure, I’ll keep my mouth shut”
*
The ride to the party was filled with laughter and chit-chats. They were all in a great mood to finally have a mini-break in between shows and what better way to celebrate it than at a big party?
Luke stole glances from Y/N as she talked to Bethany. She looked beautiful with her black dress, making Luke proud and a little bit snug about him being the one who would take her home afterward.
But he knew that after tonight they needed to talk. And not “talk” like they usually do. No, this time he was going to express his concerns to her, his hopes for them, and confess his love for her over and over again. He wanted her to know how he feels, he needed to know where they stand and what she needs to feel more comfortable and what he can do to help her feel at ease.
He just needs reassurance, something to hold on to while he provides the same for her. In the end, he knew they would be okay.
After a few minutes, they reached the house of the host. Luke marveled at the mansion that stood proudly in front of him. When Y/N mentioned a party with some label associates, she never mentioned that the party was going to be hosted by the president and owner of the label.
He felt Y/N tug on his hand a couple of times before separating herself from him and going to stand next to the girls.
For a moment Luke forgot that they needed to keep appearances and couldn’t be together romantically in public. He could feel his heart aching as he watched her walk away with her friends, laughing together as they stepped into the party.
“Hey,” Michael said behind him, following the eyes of the sad man next to him “It’s just one night”
He tried to be comforting, but all Luke could wonder was: Would it be just for a night?
The party was wild. That’s the first thought everyone has in their minds as they step through those doors into a world of darkness mixed with neon lights, smoke machines, and three open bars scattered around the hall. People were separated into groups: The ones who were too drunk to stop dancing, the ones not drunk enough to start dancing, and the ones who were networking their way into the industry.
Everyone that was someone was at that party. Producers, artists, songwriters, performers, agents… You name it. It was a party for the big leagues and Luke could not help but feel out of place the moment he stepped foot into the scene.
“Hey! 5 Seconds of Summer. C’mere!” A voice called over the music.
Standing not too far from them there was a man, his bald head shined under the lights as he held a drink to his lips, beckoning the band to come over.
Y/N and the guys started walking towards the man without a second to wait, leaving Luke and their girlfriends to witness the interaction from afar.
“Who’s that?” Asked Luke, getting closer to Danielle as they watched their partners laugh with a bunch of men who were now surrounding the band.
“That’s Anthony Kellinghs” She answered, swiftly grabbing a drink from one of the trays carried by the passing waitresses “He’s one of the big bosses in the industry. Ashton said his team approached them not too long ago to see if they would be interested in changing labels and work with them”
Luke glanced back to the group. Y/N was standing next to Calum, talking about something that made Anthony smile even though her face was serious. He did not like the way that man was looking at her.
Anthony laughed loudly, making other guests turn his face towards them. Y/N and the boys shared a confused gaze as they laughed awkwardly along with him. The bald man kept laughing, clearly intoxicated as he lowered his hand and rounded his arm around Y/N’s waist.
Luke’s breath got caught in his lungs as he watched how Y/N’s body movements came to a halt and her eyes widened in discomfort, her smile seemed stiff but she didn't stop laughing or talking to the guy. Luke could feel his blood boil as he watched his girl in the arms of someone else, acting like nothing was happening and that everything was fine, in front of him.
“What the fuck?” He muttered under his breath. Debating on whether he should go and punch that dude in the face. No matter how important he was in the industry, he wanted him away from Y/N immediately.
But he didn’t move and neither did Y/N. Luke didn’t know if it was because she physically couldn’t or because…
No, he rejected that thought immediately. It was clear to him by her eyes that she was desperate to get away from his touch. And apparently not only to him because the moment that man put his hands around her Ashton and Michael called his attention away from her, moving a few steps back so Y/N could have more space to free herself the moment she could. Calum had his eyes on her, too, with his arm placed to his side as if he were to take her away from there at any second.
Yet the man did not move an inch away from her. Instead, his hand trailed lower with every word he spoke, until Luke couldn’t see it anymore. All he could see what’s Y/N’s uncomfortable face as she suddenly jumped forward, fear written all over her eyes.
Luke let out a curse as he took a step forward, ready to beat that man’s face to dust. But he stopped when he felt a hand on his shoulder.
“Wait!” Danielle said, eyes locked on the scene played in front of them.
Luke stared ahead and let out a breath of relief when he saw Calum taking Y/N away from the group and towards the bar, seemingly excusing themselves to get a drink. He saw how his friend’s arm rounded around her shoulders, making it impossible for her to look back and for anyone else to notice her face as they walked away with no intentions of coming back.
Luke lost sight of them as he watched them disappear into the party. “Good,” he thought “At least she’ll be safe and away from him” But that thought did not calm the rage he felt towards the creep that dared touch her in front of her friends.
“I’m going to kill him” He hissed, once again trying to step forwards but once again being pushed back by Ashton’s girl.
“The guys got it covered,” She said, her sweet voice laced with a warning as she whispered loud enough for only them to hear “They will handle it and make sure they never work with that man, ever. It’s not the first time this has happened”
“This happened before?!” Luke said, attracting some curious eyes to him. But he couldn’t care less about it at the moment.
The girls looked at each other and then at Luke. How could they explain to the man that this happens more times than Y/N would be able to admit? They knew first hand how the industry was full of creeps and disgusting men, having dealt with them in the past as well, but Y/N…
She was the front girl, the main focus of attention. She was beautiful, talented, hot… that’s all they saw, never caring about her caring personality, or how intelligent she was, how she was the driven force of 5SOS. She was more than her looks, she was a girl trying to live her dreams. But men only seem to see one thing.
“I’m going to check on them,” Kat said as she walked towards where Calum disappeared with Y/N. Bethany mentioned going to Michael to try and make them get away from the conversation they were still having with that fucker.
And Luke stood there, not able to do anything “Y/N wouldn’t want you to cause a scene, that’s why the boys never do it anymore. She knows how important image is for all of them and a scandal is the last thing they need right now. Especially if some “random dude” goes and punch one of the biggest names in the industry”
Danielle was right and he hated that. He hated that he couldn’t do anything to defend his girl because she didn’t want to be defended. But the fact that she knew how to handle these kinds of things didn’t make it any less wrong or difficult for him to ignore. More so because their relationship was still kept a secret.
Luke couldn’t help but think that maybe if people knew they were together, things like these wouldn’t happen. After all, the only thing men like Anthony respected was the presence of another man.
Ashton and Michael returned after a minute, both of them with their jaws clenched and eyes filled with the same feeling of powerless Luke felt.
“Where is she?” Ashton asked, standing beside Dani and holding her close by the waist, almost as if he were scared something might happen to her.
“Kat went to check on them, they still haven’t returned,” She said, comforting her boyfriend by running her hand up and down his arm.
“This is bullshit” Luke murmured, frustration lacing his voice as he grabbed one drink from one of the waitresses and drowned it in one go without flinching. He turned around and started walking away from the group.
“Where are you going?” Michael asked, half concerned and half furious from him walking away at this moment.
“I need air” He answered as he took another drink and walked through the garden doors. Not even sparing a glance back when Y/N called his name as she watched him go.
Luke spent most of the night going back and forwards between the main hall and the garden. He drank whatever was being offered to him and sat down on a bench as he watched the casual smokers come outside, accompanying him from a distance.
He knew he was being childish. He didn’t understand much about the industry, nor how people that worked in it were. All Luke knew was that Y/N was nothing like them; she was not greedy, nor was she a creep, she wasn’t evil or ill-hearted and she didn’t deserve what happened.
He wanted to be with her, apologize for his shitty behavior, and tell her that he loved her. Because he did. He loved her with all his heart and it hurts him to see her like that. But every time he stepped through those doors back to the main hall - every time more intoxicated than the others - she was nowhere to be found. Or she didn’t want to be found, but that didn’t stop Luke from looking for her.
And every time, wherever he found her, she would have company. Sometimes she would be with the boys and their girlfriends laughing along with some other group of people - usually men - that stood a little too close and personal with her. Other times she would be on her own, talking to some guy or girl he didn’t know, too preoccupied with her conversation to even notice Luke standing at a distance, looking at her with longing eyes as he tried to find the courage to talk to her.
Then, he would go back to the bar, order his drink and go back outside or with the group, tightening the grip on his glass as he watched the girl he loves being swept away in conversations he couldn’t be a part of, after all, he was just one of the composers and her friend. Nothing else.
The guys and their girlfriends tried to cheer him up, including him in conversations and inviting him to dance. They knew how new this was to him, having to remind themselves every once in a while when they caught his sad eyes dancing across the room on the looks of his fleeting love.
“She came looking for you a few minutes ago while you were outside,” Dani told him the third time he came by the group.
“Why didn’t she go out with me?” He asked, eyes on Y/N as she talked to Michael and one of the producers they met in London a few years back.
“She was going to,” Ashton chimed in “She walked over there but I think Niall caught wind of her and they started to catch up”
Luke clenched his jaw at the thought of Y/N with other men. His mind couldn’t help but to go back to all those articles about her exes, her possible new partners, her possible future partners. Cheating scandals, break-up songs, parties where she didn’t leave alone… All the things she refused to acknowledge came to the surface, hitting Luke in the face as he realized that they might not all be lies.
He hated to think about her that way, to think that he didn’t trust her enough or that she didn’t trust him enough or whatever the fuck was wrong with them. But as he saw how Y/N hugged a stranger, all his thoughts went out the window.
“Who is that?” He asked no one in particular.
“Who?” Bethany asked in response, following Luke’s stare towards her friend “Oh, that’s Josh”
“Josh? As in Josh Benthlow? Her ex?”
Beth furrowed her eyebrows as she saw the look of pure rage on the blonde’s eyes “Uh, yeah? But you got something wrong there” She said, “They never dated”
Y/N laughed at something Josh said, pushing him playfully on the shoulder as he kept telling his story. Luke recognized the look in his eyes; it was the same way he used to look at Y/N when they first met: Pure adoration. And, he didn’t know if it was the alcohol in his system that was making him see things that weren’t there, but he could swear he saw Y/N flirt back at him.
“Friends don’t act like that” He spat, taking another sip from his drink, already losing count of how many he had that night.
“Hey!” Beth called his attention, taking the drink from him “That’s enough now. Alcohol is making you act like a complete asshole”
“I-”
“I don’t care.” She said, interrupting whatever he had to say before he even said it “Look, I get that you’re getting used to all of this. But you need to stop with the jealous act right this instant. She’s famous, yes, they all are and that means that you will have to share her with the world whether you like it or not. It’s her dream after all, and besides Y/N would never do something like that to hurt you and you know it”
Did he?
Not long after the group decided to go back to the hotel, having already stayed at that party longer than necessary given that they have a show the next day. The ride back was quiet, everyone either being too tired to even speak or too smart to try and cut the tension that was being created by the new couple’s behavior. Even when Y/N sat next to Luke he didn’t acknowledge her, keeping his eyes looking outside the window the whole car ride.
Y/N was one of the first ones to get out of the car, walking up to the elevators and not waiting for anyone as the doors closed.
Luke clenched his jaw as he contemplated not going to their room tonight, fighting with the feeling of not wanting to see her and the feeling of never wanting to let her go.
“You need to go there right now,” Calum said, taking a step next to Luke but not looking in his eyes “Having been her friend for so long I can see that she’s upset… Nah, fuck that. Even idiots can see that she’s upset”
Luke scoffed “She’s the one that’s upset?” Voice laced with sarcasm.
Calum hummed “Guess not every idiot can see that” He pressed the button of the elevator and hoped in with Kat, not waiting for Luke as the door closed in his face, but not before saying “You’re not the only one hurting, you know?”
It took another 20 minutes for Luke to open the door of their room. Again, Y/N was nowhere to be seen, but the light coming from under the closed bathroom door let him know that she was there.
He sat at the edge of the bed, hands covering his face as he now wished he hadn't drunk as much as he did. His head was spinning, he couldn’t decipher if it were because of the alcohol or because of his intrusive thoughts that wouldn’t leave his head.
Y/N got out of the bathroom for what it felt like an eternity later. She was wearing her Spongebob pajama and her hair was tied in a messy bun. Her makeup-less face looked tired as she didn’t glance at Luke before sitting by her side of the bed.
They stayed in silence for another five minutes before she decided to speak.
“Are we going to talk about tonight?” She said, voice neutral of any emotion.
Luke scoffed “Now you want to talk?”
She ignored him “I didn’t see you all night, Luke. I was worried”
“Oh, you were?” He mocked with cruel sarcasm as he got up from the bed and started pacing around the room “Funny way to show it you weren’t around!”
“I wasn’t around?! Luke, you spent half the night outside! Every time I came over you were nowhere to be found!”
“And every time I was there you were too busy talking to other people”
“I was working, Luke!” She said with a groan, massaging her temple as she turned to look at him “It’s part of my job to make connections at these kinds of events. And if you didn’t notice, Calum, Ashton, and Michael did the same”
“Well, you must be pretty damn good at your job then!”
Y/N looked at him, shocked by the way he was speaking to her “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Luke was angry at her question. How could she not know? “Why don’t you ask Josh what I mean?”
“Oh my fucking GOD,” She said with the loudest tone he’s ever heard her talk “That’s what this is all about?! He’s a friend!”
“I was a friend, too and we still fucked!” Luke matched her tone of voice, probably waking the people in the room next to theirs.
Y/N laughed humorlessly “You have no right to-”
“And whose fault is that? Huh? Whose fault is that I cannot call you my girlfriend in front of other people? Whose fault is that I have to stand to the side and watch you flirt with every guy on earth just because “it’s your job”?” He asked “Y/N, I’m trying so hard for you to let me in and the only thing you do is push me away! Are you embarrassed by me in any way?”
“No,” She said, finally meeting his eyes and seeing no more anger in them, just an incredible sadness for both of them “No, of course not”
“Then why?” Luke asked, taking a step towards her and cupping her cheek with one hand “Why can’t you let me protect you? Why can’t I be with you freely? I know some things are hard for you to talk about, love. I get that. But I’m drowning here, not knowing what to think or what to say to make you trust me”
Y/N stayed quiet as she looked into his eyes before looking away. Luke sighed.
“We don’t have to talk about this right now. But we’ll have to do it eventually”
“I know,” She said with a string of voice.
“Sorry for the things I said”
“I’m sorry, too”
Luke wanted to kiss her, to comfort her. Even though he is still mad at her, he still has this need to protect her from the wrongs of the world. But she’s got to let him in first.
Instead, Luke placed a kiss on her head and walked towards the bathroom to get changed for the night. When he came back Y/N was already asleep on her side of the bed, her back turned to Luke’s side.
He let out a sigh as he turned off the lights, laying down facing the other side as he murmured a “Good night” Barely missing the soft sniff she gave in response.
The next morning Luke woke up without her by his side. He felt a tug in his heart as he remembered all the things he said to her, the cruel way in which he implied that it was all her fault when both of them had a bit of blame to put in their names. He wouldn’t be surprised if in the middle of the night she decided to leave and sleep somewhere else.
He grabbed his phone from the nightstand, ready to give her a call and apologize properly, hoping she’d pick up. But just as he was about to press the call button, the door opened.
Y/N walked in, sandwich and orange juice in hand. A small smile came to her lips when she saw him already awake.
“Hey,” She said softly, almost like if there were someone else in the room that was sleeping “You missed breakfast, so I bought you this. It’s now much but-“
“Thank you,” Luke said with complete honesty.
Y/N nodded, walking up to his nightstand to place the drink and the sandwich. But before she could walk away again, Luke grabbed her softly by the arm.
“Luke-“
“I’m sorry,” He said, his baby blue eyes looking into hers. He was sad to see no emotion in them compared with how shiny they were yesterday before the fight “I didn’t mean it”
Y/N let out a sigh as she sat on the bed next to him “No, you’re not” She said almost resignedly “And yes, you did. And it’s okay, I deserve it”
Luke shook his head, feeling even worse than before “No, Y/N I was out of place and-“
“You were, but that didn’t make your words any less than truthful. I hurt you, Luke. Even without wanting to” She said with a broken voice, but the tears didn’t come “But I want to change that. Tonight, we can talk after the concert. Okay?”
“I don’t want to pressure you” His hand flew to her face, placing a strand of hair behind her back. She smiled softly and kissed the palm of his hand.
“I know, but I want to” Finally, she got up from the bed and started walking into the bathroom, gathering some of her things. “We’ll start early today with some interviews and sound check, and the girls wanted to go shopping so they’ll meet us there. I will send a car for you before the concert and then we’ll talk. Alright?”
She grabbed her back and headed towards the door, giving Luke one last look and a soft smile before she left.
Luke didn't forget how she didn’t kiss him before she closed the door.
*
The day passed by and Luke was still in their room. He sat in front of the table with his notebook and pen, writing up words that, at that moment, reminded him of her.
He didn’t like how they were acting with each other. How quick everything went to shit after last night’s mistakes when words were louder than actions until those words became apologies.
Y/N said he didn’t mean his apology, and deep down he knew it to be true. He regrets the way he told her, admiring that he would have handled things a little better than he did. But he meant what he said about her pushing him away by not communicating. They were both trying but apparently, they sucked at it.
Truth was, there was no one to blame. Truth was, they were both at fault. And, truth was that he would still fall to his knees for her the moment she asked. Because he had never loved someone as much as he loved her.
When the time of the concert was almost upon him, he quickly jumped into the shower, ignoring all the beeps and rings of his phone as his thoughts and hopes filled his mind. He thought about what he was going to say to her, and he hoped that they could finally get past this and leave this whole situation behind; to start over and just be free.
He was putting on his shirt when his phone started beeping again, finally checking it to see what the fuss was all about.
Thousands upon thousands of notification flooded his screen, and they all said the same thing:
“Y/N AND MADDEN BACK TOGETHER?!”
“THE ENCOUNTER OF THE YEAR! MADDEN BANKS AND Y/N L/N SEEN TOGETHER AGAIN TALKING ON THE OUTSIDES OF THE VENUE”
“OMG Y/N X MADDEN SHIPPER REJOICE AS THE COUPLE SEEMS TO HAVE REKINDLED THEIR RELATIONSHIP AFTER CHEATING SCANDAL”
Luke felt as if an elephant was standing on top of his chest, losing his balance and falling to the bed with his phone in hand, unable to look away from his screen.
His breathing became elaborated as his eyes filled with tears as he read the tweets and article titles. He knew he shouldn’t click on them. He knew. And yet…
“Lead singer of the band 5 Seconds of Summer, Y/N L/N was last seen talking to her ex-boyfriend, Madden Banks, in a secluded alley outside the venue where the band is going to perform their concert tonight.
We last saw the couple last year around August when Madden announced their breakup after cheating scandals came out to the surface. None of the parties made any comments about it, but it was set to believe that Y/N was the one who committed the mistakes after a set of tweets on Bank’s personal account where it said that he was feeling “broken-hearted” by the situation and he hoped no one had to get through that ever again.
Now it seems that the past is the past! As Y/N and Madden were caught by paparazzi talking again, and by the looks on both their faces it seemed like their relationship was not over after all!
We are still waiting for confirmations from either of them but congratulations to the couple ❤️”
A set of pictures were attached to the article. All of them of bad quality and from questionable sources.
On the first one, you could see Madden smiling with Y/N’s back facing the camera. On the second one, Madden was closer to her, almost cradling her face as if to kiss her. The third picture had Madden pointing out the paparazzi, a surprised expression plastered on his face as Y/N appeared out of focus. The last picture had Y/N walking away with Madden following behind, both of them with angry faces seemingly for being interrupted.
Luke was gripping on his phone tightly, a sense of rage coming over him as he wiped his tears furiously and walked up the door. Turning off his phone before he could read Y/N’s message:
Y/N: it’s not true! Let me explain…
*
He did not go to the concert that night, nor did he stay in their bedroom, opting for sleeping in the room that was originally assigned to him.
His emotions walked him into a bar last night, letting him drown his sorrows in alcohol as he slowly drifted away from his senses. He doesn’t remember getting to the hotel, but he does remember not wanting to be with her that night. Feeling betrayed and used, what was the point?
It was pretty late when he woke up the next morning, too late for Y/N to even be in the hotel knowing that they still needed to do a lot of press before traveling to their next destination. It was sufficient to say that he was not going to go with them.
He was about to book a flight when he noticed his phone died while being turned off last night. He was in such a rush that he forgot to bring his charger with him, but he felt confident that it was safe for him to go back to her room now that she was gone. He would pack all his things and leave, he was not about to endure any of this shit anymore, no matter how much it hurts him.
When he opened the door to her room, however, Luke noticed that he was not alone.
“You didn’t come last night”
Y/N was standing by the window, looking at the street through the thin curtain, hoping she might catch a glimpse of Luke walking back to her. She was wearing the hotel’s robe and had her hair tied in a ponytail. Her voice was fragile, tired, and broken as if she spent all night crying.
“Good,” thought Luke “at least we’ll both be miserable”
Luke didn’t answer that, instead, he just asked “I thought you’d be doing the press tour”
She shook her head, her back still facing him as she sniffed “I couldn’t go. I didn’t know where you were”
He would’ve thought it was touching and he might’ve felt bad for her if she hadn’t shattered his heart the night before. So he said nothing.
“I needed you last night, Luke,” She said, voice a little firmer as she finally turned around. Luke’s heart ached when he saw her delicate figure, she looked sick, pale, and tired. Her eyes were puffy and her nose was red from all the crying. Part of him wanted to go to her and hold her, but her betrayal was still too fresh on his skin.
Luke scoffed “Sure you did” He didn’t intend for his voice to sound with such malice, but it was almost as if his tongue had a brain on itself “Was Madden not enough?”
“Stop,”
“Is he here?” He asked, voice mocking interest as he walked around the room “C’mon Asshole!” He called, opening the closet doors and walking into the bathroom “You won, motherfucker, you can have her! It’s not like it’s hard anyway”
Her eyes widened at his words, cheeks turning pink at the realization of the insult “Luke!”
“Was this part of your plan?” He asked, turning towards her with nothing but the rage inside his eyes “To bring me here to make him jealous? To make me fall for you so easily? Is that why we never went public? Ha! Should’ve known you just wanted a free pass to whore around while still making sure you have a secure fuck waiting back at the hotel”
Y/N froze. Not even Luke could believe the words that were coming out of his mouth, but he was too far gone in his own anger to process them or to take them back.
“This is the part where you apologize,” She said, eyes filling with tears she refused to spill.
“No, this is the part where I tell you to fuck off” Luke spat, taking a step towards her, not realizing how she flinched as she took a step back “You know, I tried so fucking hard for months to make you happy. And every day I read those fucking articles that were talking shit about you and every fucking day I told myself that those weren’t real. That you weren’t like that�� surprise, surprise! Looks like the cat is out of the bag. Makes sense! That’s why you never wanted to talk, you never wanted to admit to what you did because you never take any fucking responsibilities for the damages you cause! I thought I knew you, at least some parts of you. Turns out everyone is right about you. Every fucking word of it”
He turned around, ready to grab his things and go, but the adrenaline was kicking in and he just couldn’t stop.
“Tell Madden that he’s an idiot for taking you back,” He said with his back turned to her “That he should’ve left your cheating ass alone. Let you get what you deserve”
“I never cheated” She mumbled, voice barely above a whisper.
He scoffed “Yeah, right”
“I never fucking cheated!” Y/N raised his voice, making Luke turn around to face her. Her face was red with tears and she had her fist clenched to her sides, knuckles white from all the pressure she was putting in.
“I never cheated on Madden! I never fucking cheated on you! On anyone! He cheated on me, repeatedly and with several people for all the course of our relationship! I never touched a person outside ANY of my relationships. I have been nothing but faithful to you and now you’re throwing that shit at me without knowing an ounce of my side of the story?!
You want to know, Luke, why I never tell the story as it was? Why it’s so fucking hard for me to tell the story even to the people I love?”
It was a challenge, he knew from the look in her eyes that she was not going to stay quiet any longer. She didn’t even wait for his answer.
“I was fucking abused, Luke! Physically, mentally, sexually… you fucking name it! During that whole relationship. Want me to tell you the details or you could figure it out yourself?! I was getting beaten almost daily! I had to hide the bruises and cuts in front of the guys as they slowly watched me fall apart. I had to lie to them for YEARS because I genuinely thought he loved me. He said he did so I believed him. It wasn’t until one night where he got too far that I had to tell myself that it was enough. But what could I say? I was so fucking embarrassed I couldn’t go to the media that calls me a liar every chance they have! I couldn’t go to the police because he has money and could easily get away with it! I was so fucking alone until I met you and… You took his side”
Luke felt like his heart was taking a punch with every word that she said. Every tear that fell off her eyes was like a knife in the back. The guilt was eating him inside out, crashing into him like a tsunami. He should’ve kept his mouth shut, he shouldn’t have let his emotions take the reins, he should’ve... He felt all of his emotions turn to mush, all but shame as he stared into her eyes knowing he was the one who fucked up.
“Y/N-“
“I needed you last night when he cornered me. I needed you by my side as I broke down backstage because you weren’t answering your phone. How do you think I felt when I came into our room and found it empty? I was ready to tell you everything and then you just decided that wasn’t worth it anymore. That I wasn’t worthy anymore. All without giving me a chance” She cried, shattering sobs running through her body as she remembered the feeling of hopelessness she had “Not only that, but I come to find this on your side of the bed”
She threw his notebook at him, he didn’t need to open it to know what she read. Already regretting leaving it there.
“Sometimes, you're a stranger in my bed
Don't know if you love me or you want me dead.
Some days, you're the best thing in my life
Sometimes when I look at you, I see my wife
Then you turn into somebody I don't know
And you push me away
Fight so dirty, but your love's so sweet
Talk so pretty, but your heart got teeth
Late-night devil, put your hands on me
And never let go”
She recited the words by memory, having read them over and over again as she waited for him to come back.
“Is that really how you see me, Luke?” She asked, voice broken as she looked into his eyes.
Luke felt his body tremble with shame as he looked at her. He has never seen her look so sad and fragile before, the smile he loved so much was gone and he knew he might never see it again. He wanted to scream that that’s now how he saw her at all. Those words were written out of frustration, out of anger. He wanted to tell her that she’s the most amazing, loving, strong, intelligent person he know but... how could he even look her in the eyes?
He knew that he went too far. That he should’ve given her a chance to explain what happened instead of just letting the media fill his brain with lies; lies he believed without question because of his insecurities. He broke the strongest girl he’s ever known, but she was still standing.
Despite the hurt, he caused her, she was still standing in front of him. Demanding answers he doesn’t know how to give. Still being so much braver than him.
“Y/N, I-“ He began, voice breaking as he was left speechless. How could he ask for her forgiveness now that he broke every ounce of trust she held for him?
“Luke, I think you should leave,” She said, rounding her arms around her torso as she looked back at the window. Unable to hold her gaze to him any longer.
“No,” Luke begged of her. Pleaded, even “Y/N, baby don’t-“
“Leave” She repeated more firmly “If I’m such a monster, the best thing we can do is for you to go home”
She turned her back to him once again, and he knew that he had just lost the battle he was too scared to even fight.
Y/N cried silent tears as she heard him gather his belongings and pack his bags, feeling as if she might collapse into the floor if she weren’t holding herself too tightly. If she concentrated, she could hear him cry, too, until he closed the last of his bags and walked through the door.
Because, after all, he would still go to the ends of the world if she asked.
.
.
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#luke hemmings#5 seconds of summer#5sos#luke hemmings imagine#luke hemmings fanfiction#Luke hemmings fanfic#suchalonelysunflower#end up here series#5sos!reader au#5sos fic#5sos imagine#5sos writing#5sos fanfiction#luke 5sos#5sos luke#luke 5 seconds of summer#luke hemmings angst#Luke hemmings smut#5 seconds of summer luke#5 seconds of summer fanfiction#5 seconds of summer fanfic#ashton irwin#calum hood#michael clifford#over and out#Luke fic#Luke imagine#luke fanfic#Luke x reader#luke x you
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❛ A FUTURE COP ❜
❚❙ REQUEST BY ANON: hi i hope ur having the greatest week on the planet , can i request where reader is younger than hank and she tells him shes pregnant and telling him with some fluff
❚❙ HANK VOIGHT MASTERLIST.
❚❙ WORDS: about 2k.
❚❙ A/N: this writing hasn’t been edited, you may find some grammar mistakes, I’m sorry about that. If you find a description about body or a word out of place, or something that it makes you feel uncomfortable / unrepresented, let me know by a private message and I will change it delighted.
❚❙ GIF credits: to my amazing @sonsofeorl.
❚❙ Tag list: @melblacc @rebelwrites @skyofficialxx @sesamepancakes @scarletsoldierrr @mondefantastique @that-chick212 @enbyamaro @inlovewith3 @ocetevasgirl @sophie-writes @destynelseclipsa @jadakiss13. If you want to be added to my tag list, send me a message.
You have lost the count of how many minutes you've been sitting in the locker room, in silence. Your head is loud enough right now. Hank has left the police station already, and you're waiting the time accorded before doing the same and driving your way to his house. Almost one year and you keep staying there ten minutes more than him, to not make anyone suspect about your relationship. But you aren't sure if you're ready to go.
The fear of losing Hank for what you have to tell him is consuming you, like a big fire reducing your bones to ashes. It's painful, for describing it somehow. The pressure within your chest is going to kill you, suddenly breaking into an anguish crying, resting your back against the wall and curling your legs to your torso. The two of you haven't talked about starting a family. The loss of Justin still being an open wound, bleeding a little bit every day. How are you supposed to tell him that you're pregnant?
“(Y/N)?”
Antonio's voice races your heart, peeking his head out through the lockers. He sounds worried. He looks worried, walking slowly towards you without profering any sharp move. Kneeling next to you, not sure about what he can do, the detective holds your hand to caress the back of them with his thumb; thinking that this gesture can help you to relax. But the sob continues stuck in your throat and the tears roam your cheek like a torrential and furious racing river.
Sitting down by your side, Antonio places an arm over your shoulders, urging you to rest your head on his. He doesn't know what to say. And even if he wanted to say something, his vocal cords fail when your phone dings with a notification and he sees the screen illuminating over the floor. Hank. “Voight?” He thinks raising up an eyebrow, in a mix of curiosity and confusion.
“Where are you? Something jumped off?”
Grabbing your phone and blocking it to keep it inside your pocket, you turn at the man. Your lips are trembling. You're not sure if you can talk, but you need to rip it off from your chest. You don't want to lose Hank, at this point, not even your work matters.
“Ant—Antonio… I am… pregnant”.
Shaking his head slightly, his eyes widened surprised. His forefinger points at the floor for a moment, to the position of your phone a second ago, asking without words if Hank is the father. You nod pressing your lips. He's in shock. You can see in his eyes, trying to find the correct sentence to say. Congratulations? Are you kidding me? Voight, seriously?
“We… started to date… a year and a half ago and… hm… made it official almost a ye—year ago”.
“Who knows it?”
“Only you. No one else. And I'm terrified, be—because… I was there when he lost Justin and… shit, we've always taken all the care, but… this happened”. Biting your bottom lip, as the tears keep filling up your eyes, you try to not cry anymore. “I don't know… how to tell him. I don't know if he wants this. I don't want to lose him, Antonio”.
“Hey, listen now. You're not gonna lose him, okay?” Turning his body at you and adopting your same position, he hits your shoulder briefly with his fist. “I've an idea. Write him and tell him that you're on your way and meet me in the hall”.
Nodding, he shows you a soft smile before standing up to leave the locker room. Cleaning your cheeks with the back of your hands, you do exactly what he has told you. After writing to your boyfriend and picking up your things, you walk out of the place to wait downstairs. Not a minute after, Antonio comes from behind the main desk saying his goodbye to Platt, before following you to the outside.
Offering you the bag he's carrying in his right hand, keeping the other in a pocket, you take it with curiosity.
“This department, his career, is his life. This is a good way to tell him”.
Grabbing the piece of clothing inside it, you read the emblem of Chicago P.D. before noticing the small size of the shirt.
“We usually give these shirts to the kids who come to see the station”.
Yes. That's the better idea. Your lips curve up in a tender grin of gratitude. You can't help but hug him, without caring who can be watching you.
“C'mon, go to his house and give it to him”.
“Thank you, Antonio… I don't… I don't know what to say”.
“You don't have to. Tell me tomorrow how it has goin'”.
In silence, you nod after placing a kiss on his cheek, keeping back the grey t-shirt inside the bag to go find your car in the private parking.
As always, the road is somewhat empty, reaching Hank's neighborhood in a sight. You can see the lights turned on inside, through the windows, and a free place to park your SUV behind his. Taking your time to leave your car there, you step out having a deep breath trying to calm yourself and your nerves. In your head dance a lot of possible ways about how he will react, and every one of them scares you like never.
Putting your eyes on the bag, you find the needed encouragement to come into his house. Leaving your backpack at the entrance, you lead your steps to the back garden, finding Hank sitting on a wooden chair, leaning forward and shaking his knees nervously. You haven't come this ‘late’ before. But as soon as you sit by his side, placing the bag over the dinner table, he feels less agitated.
Resting his back against his chair, tangling his hands over his abdomen, he can't help but feel curiosity about the content of it and the worrying installed on your face.
“What kind of hell are you into, hm?”
Rubbing the line of his jaw with his thumb, he intertwines his hands again waiting for a response. Maybe we need to talk aren't the words you want to choose, but they're the ones that escape from your throat. Watching how his face hardens, you gulp before licking your bottom lip.
“I don't know how it happened. It's not like… I planned it”.
“Don't beat around the bush and be clear with me”. Hank gesticulates with his forefinger, as he always does when he's losing his nerves. “That's why you have been acting distant, right? If you don't want to continue, just tell me”.
He hisses the last three words, hiding the misery in his tone of voice, leaning forward to you. And that really hurts you, to think that he believes you don't love him anymore. That he may think that his life is not compatible with yours. But that's bullshit. You would make them both fit at any cost, if you would have to.
“What? No, no, no! I'm not going to leave you, Hank. I don't want to”.
“Then, what is this about?”
You can't help but close your eyes and take a deep, deep, deep breath until you feel your lungs about to explode. Expelling the air through your nostrils, you decide to give him the bag instead of continuing screwing up the situation by using the wrong words. Frowning, he slides his hand inside it to take off the shirt of small size. Putting it between his fingers and in front of his hands, Hank raises an eyebrow without understanding what that shirt means.
“You stole it?”
“Technically… It wasn't me, but… Antonio”.
“Antonio stole a shirt and gave it to you, because he doesn't know how to return it?”
Moving your lips in silence, trying to say something, you can't believe he's really this fucking dumb. Shrugging he keeps it back inside the bag, pressing his lips.
“I will do it tomo—”.
“To be a detective, you're too stupid, Henry”. The laugh fills up the garden for a moment, starting to feel less scared than five minutes ago. “Hold the shirt again and put that brain of yours to work”.
He grunts tired of your games, doing what you just told him. Placing it stretched over the table, your boyfriend seems thoughtful rubbing his chin. Looking at you sideways, he shakes his head not getting what you want to tell him, turning towards you clapping his hands.
“I hate riddles. Spit it of a damn time, sweetheart”.
“I'm pregnant”.
Hank doesn't move a single inch of his body, as if he hadn't listened to you. His brown eyes are glued on yours. He doesn't even blink, looking at you as if he's studying your face to make sure himself that it's not a macabre joke. That you aren't kidding. That you're telling him the truth. When he kisses his lips, still remaining silence, you feel at the edge.
“Listen, I was scared of telling you. Not only because it means that people should know we are together, but because I don't know how you feel about it. But I swear for my badge, if you don't say anything in ten seconds, I'm gonna punch you in the face. And believe me, I have had a horrible day, Hank. Got too much rage accumulated in my hands”.
“I don't know what to say”. He whispers while you finish your threat.
Barely breathing, you nod, licking your incisors, putting your gaze away somewhere in the garden. It wasn't the response you wanted to hear, but it was the one you were waiting for. Being sure that he's going to end your relationship, but at least taking care of your baby, the tears fill up your eyes, reddening them again.
Cleaning a furtive one running down your left cheek, you get up from your seat about to leave the porch to come into the house, grab your things and go to your apartment. The only thing you were afraid of since you met him is now destroying you slowly. But Hank doesn't let you pass him away, gently gripping your forearm to make you take a step back and sit on his lap.
“I'm sorry…” You sob covering your face with both hands, not being able to look at him.
“Why?”
“I just… I don't wanna lose you. I've never felt happier in my… fucking life, before meeting you. I'm my best version since we're together. I lo—I love you with all my heart, I swear it…”
“Is this because of Justin?”
Your cry suddenly stops, using the sleeves of your jacket to clean your face, raising it towards him. It's been a long time since you talked about his son for the last time, keeping the mourning for himself.
“I saw you, Hank. You were devastated… Your wound is still bleeding and it's okay. It's normal, I understand it. I will never tell you to not cry for him. I didn't want you to… feel like I'm trying to cover this hole in your heart, just because the only thing I want is you to be happy. I didn't wa—”.
“Justin died, that's a fact. I miss him every day of my life. I should have been a better father for him. Maybe he would be alive now, maybe that night wouldn't have ever happened. But that doesn't mean I don't want this”. He points at the grey t-shirt, giving you some hope. “There's no one who cares more about me than you do. I've imagined my life with you thousands of times. How it would be to have a family together. Do the right thing, because it's never too late to change. And as you said so, you made me a better man too. I want it, (Y/N). I want this life with you. I want this kid. And I want you”.
You pout at him, feeling much better knowing that everything is clear. Placing a hand on the back of your neck, he pushes you closer to catch your lips with his to transmit you all the happiness and the tenderness he has inside his soul, after giving him this second chance in life.
“We will talk with Crowley and Platt tomorrow, okay with that?” You nod in response. “So… Antonio knows, uh?”
“Yeah, he… found me crying in the locker room and saw your message on my phone. It was his idea”.
“He had a good one”. Hank assures while chuckling, urging to rest your head against his chest. “I will give him a biscuit tomorrow, you know, for being a smart dog”.
“He wasn't in Narcotics for anything…”
#lemme know what you think in a comment! ⚡#hank voight x reader#hank voight imagine#hank voight#chicago pd#chicago pd imagine#chicago pd x reader#one chicago
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Summary: You and Aran go to a smoke circle with some friends in matching outfits. During the 13th pass or so, someone brings up the mention of kinks.
Warnings: NSFW • drugs mentioned { Weed } • proof read
Cast: Top!M!Reader x Bottom!Aran
○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○
"You trying to hit up the twins for a circle tonight ?" You ask. Scrolling through your feed, you see Atsumu and Osamu post a tag list of people on their shared account. They had been the ones who sold you and Aran's weed in highschool.
You chuckle at those memories until you a see Aran appear in your peripheral vision. With a slight grunt he sits next to you with some chinese food in his hands. Body leaning into yours as he scoots his well built form close to yours while slipping your phone out of your hands. Reading the invite in the post directed to the people tagged, he says, "Can we match with the clothes you bought last month ?" He says. Stuffing his face with a spoonful of rice.
You nod. Chuckling slightly at the thought of you and him matching during a smoke session, with friends you might add. He caught on to your entertained noises as he cocked and eyebrow. Swallowing down his food, he looked at you. "What ? Embarrassed to go out matching ?" He asked.
Rolling your eyes you lightly push him, in move of getting up. Stretching your limbs before you started to head to the kitchen.
"Where you goin' ?" Aran hollers from the living room, homebody boyfriend. You say you were going to go get your chinese, since he already ate his. He probably thought you weren't going to eat your food so he could, greedy for your food. Not this time, can never smoke on an empty stomach.
--
You zipped up your jeans. "Ow-! Fuck !" You look behind you to see that your boyfriend was tearing out the tag from the hoodie the both of you were wearing. Your hand moved to your neck on where he gripped to take the tag off. "You need to stop surprising me, I swear to god." You mumble. You hear a light chuckle as he throws it away before coming back to kick the side of your neck.
"Sorry, sorry. You would have forgotten it and or stuffed it in your hood," He says. Your phone started to buzz on your bedroom bed. Aran grabbed it because you were busy touching up your clothes in the mirror. "Hello," He answers. A gruff hum was heard on the other side of the phone as Aran's face scrunched up in question. "Hellleer-"
"Aran ? Why you got Y/N phone ?" Osamu says across the line.
Aran laughed a bit as he says, "That's because he fixing his clothes in the mirror. Did you guys start already or sum' ?" Static and slight car noises could be heard a bit until he spoke again.
"Um- Dang. Well, we going over to Kiyoko's house because she said she wanted to roll this time." A hum of acknowledgment was given. You finished up picking leftover lint and whatnot from your outfit. Aran gave phone back to you as he went to go brush his teeth. You eyed him a bit before a short 'hello' got your attention.
"Hey 'Samu, what's up," You say. Not even getting an answer had hung up on you. "Wow, okay."
Aran spat out his toothpaste before turning back at you from the bathroom. "He said we are going to Kiyoko's house this time," Rinsing his mouth out and cleaning up the sink dutifully. "They suck at rolling is what they said." You nod at his words as he come your direction. Checking your phone you see it's 1:45.
You hum a small tune as your hands make way to your boyfriends waist. "You trying to be good for me today," Rocking back in forth in the middle of your guys' room, he nods as his head rests on your chest. "You get frustrated when high so if anything happens we can leave. Even though we've been 'round these people for a long time." You say.
He giggles a bit and breaks from your grasp. "Yeah, and you aren't any better than me. If you get like how we are in private, I'm going to personally choke you," He says. "Come on so we can get there early. Her house is far." You laugh following him to the car outside.
This day will get messy either or.
--
"Look, it's gay and gayer ! What's good ?" Tanaka greeted you and Aran. He meant no harm, but you people in the room cringed at his welcoming to the both of you.
Tanaka looked down and he saw your matching outfits. "Oh okay," he started hyping the both of you up, making and "Ouuu" noise. "I need me a girl or sum to match with." He pouted. Aran laughed in his face before Atsumu came over for a hello.
The smell of multiple alcohols and body fragrance was enough for you to realize it was gonna be a chill smoke sesh.
--
"So why yall matching like two twins at a birthday party ?" Kiyoko snickered lightly. Drinking her sure enough expensive wine in a cup. She hated wasting dishes for events like these.
Aran looked up from his phone to check if she was talking to you or him. "What," Kiyoko shook her head, taking another gulp of her velvet liquid. She fiddled with her tongue piercing before eyeing the actual twins in the room as she got up. "Don't fuck up my house. My parents get home literally tomorrow. Goodnight everyone." And with that she retired to her room.
Apparently this was cue for the twins to take initiative. Osamu brung out the speaker from his back pack as he turned on some music. Obviously nothing too loud, or everybody was going to sleep.
"You already know she don't like music playing. If you gonna play some, might aswell turn it down." Aran says. He was right. You chuckled. Snatching Osamus phone out of his hand.
"Hey, I was about to play something." You rolled your eyes. He had a bad thing with never actually picking a song. Osamu would play a dead or unwitting song just so he can say he did in fact play a song. Meanwhile he is watching some big booty hoe on live. Many occasions the audio switched to whatever porn his screen was on.
"I don't want shit to seem like a whore house Samu. Realize we in a different setting." You scoffed at him as he visibly ignored you.
Atsumu got up heading to the kitchen. You picked a decent song by a familiar artist to the room { Preferably SkiMask The Slump God }. Your body took after it's own conscience by your hand smoothing over Arans natural waves. He hums in appreciation to the contact as his own body ushers closer to you.
So touch starved he seemed to be in public spaces. A smile crept on your face. Tanaka sulked with his red cup in hand at the sight of the only official couple in the room.
You could say that Noya was in it with Yachi, but that man fucks with everyone. Last "official couple" was you and Aran, and it will probably stay that way until college graduation or even later than that.
You and Aran were close before college, but one day you just had to not act like what you two were doing was not gay. Going on casual walks like two girl bestfriends in a mall hand in hand like lovers. He thought it was skin-ship, which it was but you honestly piked how he idly leaned closer to your side to avoid the street.
All beside the flashbacks, you set Osamu's phone down and raised your voice. The twins always brung the appliances for the specific occasion in one of their backpacks.
"Hey, A-ron can you get that bagback ?" You said. Aran immediately shot you a face. He didn't liked being called that so he didn't move. Continuing to do what he was doing on his phone.
You groaned. "I can't get it," you tried reaching for the bag on the other side of him. "See ?"
"Yes you can." Aran scoffed.
You groaned boisterously until he finally grabbed the back pack and handed to you. "It's not called bag pack by the way." He said. You hummed as you took out the paper and weed. Holding it between you and Aran.
"So, who's rolling ?"
--
After Aran rolled, everyone including yourself, sat in somewhat of a circle. By circle I mean some people sat on some pillows and or closer to walls. Chips and any other snacks like skittles were laying throughout the living space. You would remember to clean up along with Tanaka since he brought majority of it.
"Have you guys been into anything freaky ?" Kyotani asked the room. A few necks craned his way as he continued to pick at the black polish on his thumb.
"No. If I did I would probably go to jail because I would tie'er up too tie, and they'll think I was trying murder her." Tanaka said.
Aran put his hand up in Tanakas direction. A signal for him not to finish nor entertain the thought anymore. "You are right however I don't believe you ever fucked anyone before,"
You chuckled. Tanaka shrugged laughing anyway. Osamu perked up afterwards saying he was intrigued by a few, but most didn't feel right with him. A mello and vanilla guy. You secretly hoped he found someone to match him perfectly.
"Let's ask the only two who have actually had sex then !" Tanaka shouted. Kiyoko banged on the walls from her bedroom, warning him to pipe down.
You and Aran are the only ones who have had intercourse and have been in a relationship. Aran shrugged. "It's that ugly ass cut on top of ya head, G." He said. Taking an inhale of the blunt before holding it up to you. He was a bit "loose" now and when he was, he was literally in a different world, and clingly while at it.
You did the same before passing it on to Tanaka in the midst of him physically blowing steam out of his ears before taking the hit.
"Shut up, 'Naka. You too loud. And Aran is right by the way." Atsumu says. Eating a bag of hot fries as he manages the music which was now playing Ocean Frank.
"Anyways," You chuckled. Looking down in your lap was Aran. Eyes lidded as he was playing with one of the strings on his hoodie. You thought he was cute as you backed his head in your chest, as he was laying on his back, legs sprawled in front of him.
"Aran looks faded as hell." Atsumu laughed. You nodded slowly since you were a bit faded aswell. Aran groaned as he got up from his original spot to curl himself in your lap. No reaction was given from the group since everyone didn't really care.
"'M fucking horny." He mumbled. You jolted a bit, but kept cool. Instead you patted his back and rubbing it with a rythym as he hummed. It was unoriginal or anything, but the way he said nearly brung you out of your high.
--
{ hours went by and eventually you guys got kicked out sooner or later. Kiyoko found half the group dead asleep or still barely snacking on leftovers over candy. You and Aran were probably the main reason though since you both just ended up kissing on her mom's couch.
"Just get fuck out." She calmly said after kicking the others bodies around the room. Opening windows to un-hotbox the room.
"Take care of him by the way. Bye Y/N." She said before shutting her house door in front of your face.
It was 11 AM so you just called an uber and layed Aran down in bed before going to sleep yourself. }
#aran smut#aran ojiro x reader#aran x male reader#aran ojiro x male reader#haikyuu smut#aran ojiro smut#bottom aran ojiro#top male reader#smoking#smoking smut#ZensFics-☆
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perfidy;tom holland|1
chapter 1: the script
enemies to lovers au
story summary: Tom and you have been sworn enemies since you were young. However, you happened to be best friends with the twins. When one of your friends challenged you to break Tom’s heart, you immediately accepted to get back at him for all the times he’s hurt you. Old feelings might come back, while both of you try to go past your pride and your lies.
chapter summary: the first time he broke your heart
pairing: tom holland x y/n
warnings: swearing, flashback in italics, juuuuuust slightly angsty but not really
word count: 3.9k
teaser next chapter series masterlist wanna be tagged?
As you know, Limits of Desire is coming to an end so I’m starting this new series. I’m very excited for this! Maybe it’ll flop but I like the idea, so I hope you like it too!
You were running late. Your alarm had not gone off and you were currently running around your apartment. Your wet hair was leaving droplets around the kitchen as you quickly devoured a cereal and tried to apply your makeup at the same time. You needed to look presentable, you’d have an interview to be an official writer on the series you currently interned at.
Everything was going too quickly this morning for your own convenience, it seemed like you were running out of time and it seemed like nothing was real. It didn’t feel real, but it was. You were trying to catch your breath as the excitement and nerves were tickling your skin.
A writing assistant/intern/coffee-runner was all you were by now, but you didn’t want to give up. Everybody’s got dreams and maybe yours were closer each day. You knew you’d have your big breakout one day, maybe it was closer than you could think of.
But everything had seemed to be stopped suddenly, as soon as good things were coming down your way, life would bring in more and more pebbles to your path. Just like the day before, everything was ready but your car, however, had decided to stop working, and of course you had been stuck under the rain in London.
Cue to the next day, to this morning when you had overslept and your nose was slightly red, and you had no transportation. You believed life hated you, but you ended up not worrying, everything would turn out to be fine even if all the odds were constantly turning around for you.
You had called your best friend, and he had assured you he’d be there to give you a ride. Seemed like he was the guardian angel that you so much needed in your life at the moment. Besides, you were excited to see him, you’d barely seen him in the last few months, his new girlfriend was taking him away from you. And you weren’t jealous, you’d still have Sam, but Sam was too busy with his own things so whenever you went to visit Harry you’d end up stuck with his older brother, whom, thank you very much, you despised.
You heard the usual claxon honking outside your building, you grabbed your coat and bag and rushed downstairs.
Harry would be picking you up and he’d probably give you a very needed pep-talk to get you ready.
You ran to the car as you felt butterflies inside your stomach. It’s alright to be nervous, you guessed, it was the opportunity of a lifetime.
But life was once more proving to you how much it could suck.
“I thought Harry was picking me up,” you stated as soon as you saw who was behind the wheel. Tom looked up from his phone and dedicated a corny smirk, you could even see a wink under his sunglasses.
“He got some stuff to do, you’re stuck with me,” Tom said.
“Was Sam not available?” You groaned.
“Work.”
“Haz?” You asked with hope.
“He had a shoot.”
“Paddy?” You were desperate.
“Oh, fuck’s sake y/n, be thankful I came. I was about to leave, took you long enough, you know makeup won’t do you miracles.”
You rolled your eyes as you opened the door and hopped into the car. You pulled out your phone to avoid any further conversation.
“You know, I’m no uber,” he sassed.
“I know, uber drivers are usually nice,” you snapped.
Tom started the car.
“I brought you tea,” he said as he eyed the cup with a smirk.
You frowned staring at it.
“I didn’t poison it, y/n,” Tom said condescendingly.
You slowly picked it up, “Thanks,” sceptically, you took a sip.
“I did spit on it, though,” Tom grinned.
You widened your eyes and glared at him. “Oh fuck off, Tom.”
“Oh, you’re gonna be that way?” Tom frowned. “You know I could pull over right here and you’d have to walk to your precious interview,” he snapped.
You sighed. “I’m sorry,” you rolled your eyes. “Did you really spit on it?”
“No, I’m kidding, y/n, gee you don’t have to take everything that serious,” He chuckled as you flipped him off.
“I don’t trust you,” you admitted.
“I know you don’t,” he laughed. “Which is the reason as to why I didn’t even have to do anything with the tea, your sole mind is doing the trick.”
You remained quiet. The ride was going to be very long.
“Are you nervous?” He turned slightly to look at you.
“A little,” you confessed.
“Ya goin’ to pitch a screenplay?” He asked.
You shook your head. “I...uh, not really.”
“Good, they wouldn’t like your writing anyway,” Tom cornily input. “Bit cheesy.”
You clenched your jaw. “They liked your acting, didn’t they?”
He scoffed. “Remind me who’s got a career.”
You stayed quiet and looked out the window. He pursed his lips.
“I’m sorry,” he broke the silence, and it seemed real. “I was joking, you’ll do amazing.”
“You really don’t have to try to make conversation, you know?” You said, slightly hurt.
There was no easy way to explain your relationship with the Holland’s. With each member of the family, you had your history.
Your mum was best friends with Nikki since diapers, they had been to school together, roommates at college and even their respective maids of honour. Naturally, they had expected you to be friends with all her kids. You were sure your mother and Nikki had had the fantasy of their kids playing in the garden, while they enjoyed a mean cup of tea. You were also sure they both had had the stupid fantasy of one of their kids falling in love growing up and becoming best friends with the others.
And it kind of went like that, growing up with them in your house, birthday parties with them, some Christmas, New Years. Always together. You knew them perfectly. Too much for your own convenience.
You were friends, at least with the twins and Paddy. There had been no trouble with the twins, the three of you got along perfectly. Sam, Harry and you had been inseparable since you were young, even if you were slightly older than them. You had hit it off right away. Even if they were fighting between them, you’d always be alright with them. It was a very innocent friendship.
Especially with Harry, both of you had shown your interest in films and cinema from a very young age. You’d be seen together always with a camera on your hands and directing Sam and Tom to act. You’d come up with the stories and Harry would help you bring them to life. Usually, your homemade movies came out fine, even if they usually involved hours of you and Tom fighting.
Especially since you lacked crew, the four of you would end up playing roles you never really liked.
But Harry would always bring out the camera your parents would borrow and film everything. Thanks to that, you’d have a lot of memories of your childhood on video. Even the ones you didn’t want to remember.
Tom always wanted to be in front of the cameras, but since you were the only girl at the time, you’d often be paired up with him. That’s when you stopped coming up with romantic stories, you really didn’t want to even hold hands with Tom,
Tom, Tom was complicated. Older than you, and extremely annoying. You had been “ friends” when you were kids, but he seemed to always have a reason to bother you. It was extremely annoying. When you were only toddlers, you got along fine, but of course what problems could toddlers possibly have.
But you grew up, and Tom possibly, no, he definitely was the worst kid you could have ever possibly imagined. He never wanted to share anything, he would always whine and he’d throw tantrums. And he’d pull your hair and he wouldn’t let you play and he’d go running to his mum to cry to complain if you ever won while playing together. He, very maturely, would stick his tongue out whenever you spoke, and he’d push you, and he’d mimic you. Now, now, if you were completely honest you weren’t good friends, you’d both always end up on the floor fighting each other. You would always pride yourself on being able to take him down. More than once you had been on top of him, after an innocent and childish wrestle.
However, you were getting tired of never being able to have 5 minutes without him insulting or bothering you. Because even with everything, you found the boy cute. Whenever he wasn’t bothering you, he was nice, he was remotely kind. It was cute. It wasn’t that you guys didn’t get along, well, you didn’t, but it seemed that Tom wasn’t able to be decent around you.
He had his good moments, like whenever he would be a gentleman and give you the first cookie, or whenever he would cut a flower and give it to you, but of course, that was usually followed by dirt being thrown at your face, as if he was trying to make a point.
And he’d constantly confuse you and your stupid little heart, which would make you blush whenever he decided to be remotely kind.
And you cursed the day your mother and Nikki had said the following words;
“He bothers you because he has a crush on you,” Nikki had said.
“That’s true, boys want attention and the only way he’s getting your attention is by being annoying. He likes you.”
And being the stupid 6 yeared old you were, you changed the way you viewed Tom, and finally became completely foolishly smitten with him. Very stupid decision. Because, really, whoever came up with that theory was very stupid. Why would you bother someone you like? And why would people go on around telling girls that guys treating them badly would mean they loved them. It was fucked up, wasn’t it? Of course, now you were older and you didn’t believe in any of that bullshit. Because at the end of the day, that’s all it was, pure horseshit.
But of course, you didn’t know well back then, so after they told you Tom had a crush on you, you, it started, the stupid decision to crush on him more. And you started to act differently, and initially, he noticed. He would ask why you would wear more dresses rather than the tomboy look you loved to have when younger, and he’d ask why you had stopped being fun. Because of course, you’d take longer to brush your hair and now you wouldn’t be playing soccer with him as much. You’d still let yourself wrestle him every now and then because that meant you could, if you took him down, hold his hands.
You were very stupid.
And you took your shot, because not only were you stupid, you had the balls. Which, looking back at it, only made you more of an idiot. But one day, just as you’d taken him down, and as he was trying to push you off of him, you decided to try something different.
“Calm down,” you had said just before you kissed his cheek, making the boy turn red and frozen to shock.
You hadn’t said anything else and you had quietly left him.
He had changed after that. It seemed like he had caught on to that, and he had stopped in a way, bothering you as much. Of course, he’d always bring in his childish games like burping in front of you, or proving how masculine and ‘better’ he was whenever you’d play anything. He’d still get angry at you whenever you beat him in a videogame or any game at all.
But something had changed. He’d now be nicer, in his own particular way. He’d be smiling more often and he’d give you more hugs, like children do. He’d let you use his favorite car, or let you be spiderman if you played.
Tom Holland had broken your heart several times throughout your life, that didn’t mean each time it hurt less, but you got used to it. You weren’t going to let him get near your heart ever again, or so you had promised yourself.
The first time he’d ever hurt you, you had been young. He was 10, you were 8. And you had taken the guts to finally tell him how you felt, in your own particular way. You’d told the twins, 7 back then, to help you.
And you had planned it perfectly, a new homemade movie. Your script consisted of you telling him you had a crush on him, and you had the guts to even write a kiss. And you were going to film it, and to this day you remembered it, and even if you didn’t want it, it was on camera.
“Alright, so the princess is going to…save the prince!” You explained to Tom. “Because she is in love with him!”
“Why does it have to be a princess?” Tom frowned. “Why not be a superhero! Besides, it should be me who saves the damsel!” Tom pushed.
“This is my movie, Thomas,” you complained.
“This is my movie, Thomas,” he mimicked. He groaned. “Why can’t I be the dragon? Why does Sam get to be the dragon?”
“Because you’re the prince!” You pushed.
He took the script off your hands. “What does it even say?” He asked as he read it. “This is stupid!”
“No, it’s not!”
Tom frowned. “Why would we kiss?” He wrinkled his nose as he stuck his tongue out.
“Because we like each other,” you explained.
“Why would anyone like you?” He sounded disgusted. “You’re ugly and stupid and you’re you!”
“Tom, Tom,” Harry said behind the camera. “It’s a movie, it’s pretend!”
“I don’t want to be in this movie anymore, less with her,” he frowned. “You’d have to be pretty stupid if you think I’d kiss you.”
“Maybe I am.”
“Everything you write is very stupid.” Because Tom and you had had boundaries, and he knew he was crossing the most important one.
“Tom that’s very mean,” you said.
“I’d rather eat a frog than kiss you.”
“She did this because she likes you,” Sam admitted, with a giggle. An innocent stunt a child pulls. “Tom and y/n!” Sam sang.
Tom walked past you. “Disgusting.”
And he left, and Harry pointed the camera at you. Your face was conflicted, and confused and sad.
Your first official heartbreak was on camera, and of course, you never watched it. You guessed your current feelings for Tom were derived form that one moment. You had been cold after that. And that was the first time you even truly cried because of him. But you were 8, it was stupid to cry over a boy.
Your mum understood why you had distanced yourself from him, for a while, at least. Even Nikki understood, so for a while, you didn’t visit the Holland’s household, and you’d only invite the twins.
And you were very petty and explicit if you ever were with the three brothers you’d use his words: “I’d rather eat a frog than have you come over.”
And the movies were ceasing, at least for a bit. But Tom did apologize, and you had been sure Nikki had forced him.
But he had come to your house with flowers on your 9th birthday and apologized, and you were sure he had written and learned the apology. But you were still very angry, and it wasn’t even because he had rejected you, it didn’t even have to do with the fact he had dared to reject you in the meanest way he could, but you were angry he had insulted your writing. From a very young age, your pride was even more
“I’m very sorry, y/n, I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean your writing was stupid and I am sorry for calling you all that, I was the one being stupid,” he had said. “And I really want to stay friends with you, because I really like you as a friend. And you look pretty in that dress.”
You had looked at the flowers, gently took them in and said: “I like the flowers but I don’t like you and I don’t want to be friends but you can have cake, I guess.”
And he was slightly upset, you could tell. And then you walked away and placed the flowers on the bin. You were dramatic.
But he had had his revenge right there on your birthday, one stupid insignificant revenge, he had ‘accidentally’ tripped on your dress and dirtied your dress with cake.
And it had started, the war. Tom and you were constantly fighting and you were sure you were now sworn enemies. It started innocent, from little pranks to insults, to very hurtful pranks that had had you crying. But you were hanging out together again, at least in the same room, and now the videos weren’t movies anymore, they were just you and Harry sillying with the camera, or sometimes Sam. Even Tom. Creating memories, you guessed. You filmed everything, birthday parties, the first time either of you got drunk, proms, studying sessions and successes.
Tom and you were friends sometimes, sometimes you weren’t, sometimes he’d act like more than friends which would make you very untrusting.
There had been several more times when Tom had hurt you and he’d later apologize. It seemed like that’s the only thing he knew how to do, apologize without meaning it. Because an apology wears out when you keep on committing the same crimes.
But you’d always end up believing in him again, and he would pull the exact thing he’d always done, give you flowers and then throw dirt at your face.
But he was so complicated, so complicated. But you guessed your feelings were more complicated. You hated him, you couldn’t stand him. Whenever he was around you’d get annoyed. But there were sometimes, just like you were kids that you’d end up having nice times, like when he’d give you one of his favorite cookies, or when he let you play with his favorite controller.
Because he’d done things that were nice, very significant things. Like the time your boyfriend had broken up with you hours before prom and Tom had shown up at your house, tux and everything, maybe it was slightly awkward at first, but he’d been there to cheer you up. He had been decent then, even nice. You had even believed, for a bit, that he could like you. Of course, he stopped talking to you the very next day and then proceeded to say that you had pathetically begged him to go to prom with you. Even if Harry had on camera how Tom had picked you up and given you flowers, he denied it, saying you had been the one to ask him.
Yes, he was still an asshole.
Yet you never seemed to learn your lesson, he always managed to warm your heart just slightly and make you forget, at least for five minutes that you hated him . You never learned that he’d always end up hurting you, just like right now, you were in the car with your stomach hurting from listening to yet more hurtful words, even if he knew he had crossed the line he shouldn’t cross. And you wished you were somewhere else instead, because he knew he had poked on what he shouldn’t have poked, and you knew he was sure you wanted to cry. But it seemed like he loved doing that, his favourite sport. He loved to play with your heart.
Because Tom and you had an off and on relationship, the relationship being enemies. But sometimes, if you were true to yourself and to each other, you were nice. Just like right now, even in his own rude way, he was still driving you.
“I really do mean it, y/n,” Tom pushed again.
You ignored him.
“Y/N.”
“What? You meant I suck at writing?”
“I meant you were amazing,” he whispered. “I’m sorry.”
“You’re always sorry,” you sighed.
Tom bit his lip. “You know, you could...uh, send me one in an I could help you get to producers, or we could write one together, or I could produce one-”
“Thanks but I--”
“I know you want to make a name by yourself,” he sighed. “But I could help you in.”
“I know, I know, thanks, Tom,” you were merely saying this because you wanted to avoid any further conversation.
“And—uh, I’m really sorry for last week when—“
“Don’t bother, don’t worry,” you quickly silenced him before he could continue with the subject. You really didn’t want to get your head thinking on anything but the interview. Probably Tom was trying to sabotage you and that was the reason why he was bringing it up.
He played music. It seemed extremely awkward. But you didn’t want to give in to any kind of conversation, because if you did then you’d have to understand if today you were going to be decent or if you were going to be rude.
You didn’t want to be anything, you didn’t have the energy to fight with him and you didn’t have the energy to pretend and be nice. It usually was his call, you just played along unless you were in the mood for something. It was either fight or flight with him.
His phone rang, and he gulped as he saw it was Harry calling. He answered it with the free hands mode anyway.
“Tom—Where’s the car? Fuck, I overslept, I didn’t set my alarm.” Harry seemed rushed.
“I took it,” Tom explained.
“No wait, I forgot I had to drive y/n—Shit I’m gonna call her.”
“No need man,” Tom cleared his throat.
You raised your brows.
“Tom, fuck, I know you guys are very angry again but this is very important to her, like—“
“I know,” Tom seemed anxious listening to his brother.
“I need the bloody car, don’t be an asshole,” Harry stated.
“You don’t need it,” Tom pushed.
“Tom—“
“Hi, Harry,” you chipped in. “He’s driving me.”
“Wait—what?” Harry was shocked.
“I was up early, tried to wake you up but since I saw you were definitely not waking up I grabbed the keys and I’m driving her,” Tom explained.
You raised your brows, perplexed. So today, he had decided it, he was your friend.
“What?” It seemed that Harry was as confused as you were.
“Yeah, I’m here,” you said.
“Y/N I’m so sorry I completely forgot last night to set it,” Harry apologized.
“No worries,” you chuckled. “I overslept, too.”
“Are you being held against your will? Is Tom not trying to kill you?” Harry asked.
“No, I’ll do that later,” Tom laughed.
“Well—uh, I’ll—“
“See you later, man,” Tom hung up quickly.
You stared at him. “I don’t want to know what you’re up to. But now I’m even more scared of being in this car with you.”
“Can’t I be nice?” Tom smirked.
“No, you can’t,” you stated. “But—thank you.”
And you would believe Tom was being nice, but you knew that he wasn’t doing this to be your friend, he was probably feeling guilty about last week. This was just another empty apology.
But you could live with it today.
teaser next chapter series masterlist wanna be tagged?
I’ll be using the tag list I used for LOD, please DO TELL ME IF YOU DON’T WANT TO BE TAGGED NO HARD FEELINGS!!
tag list @clairesrainbow @underoosmarvel @wronglanemendes @itsvianny @jake-and-amy-are-married @starlightfound @kill-the-stereo @originalpinkpowerranger @spidxrparkxr @mukesnugget @anxiousdesignerdancerbandlover @organicpurplepants @happywolves81 @nedthegay @skylar-mendes @sentimentalquackson @savannah0111 @spidermansmj14 @soccerstud004 @marinaabernardii @applenter @silver-winter-wolf @dark-infernal-instruments @claredolphinbear24 @bookgirlunicorn @tomshufflepuff @avengersgirllorianna @nevertoofarfromivar @saintlavrents @herofiennestiffinashardinscott. @tomzfrog @tohollandback @morganhoran1671 @awkwardfangirl2014 @spideysimpossiblegirl @everythingbooknerd @xapham @xapham @xxtomxo @tomhollandisagod @danicarosaline @laurfangirl424 @vintageroses1014516 @cinnamon-roll-peter @the-lost-fairy-tale @lala-florez @fufaation15 @healthyassdonut @ilcveyou3000 @xxtomxo @socorroann @muffinmari25 @cassindeansass @rogers-obsessed-barnes-curious @southsidespidey @nathaliabakes @nathaliabakes @marvelstuck @embrace-themagic @bradfordbantams @sanniegirl1214 @gioandreolli @peterpandco @fairytaleparker @underooling @griff1ndor @chubby-cheek-calum @thatweirdomimic @avengersgirllorianna @reginalaufeyson-holmes @better-daisy @yeahimcrying @allmonstersxarehuman @spider-manholland @clairesrainbow @georiaang @sebxstianbarnes @kissingtrutharchives @snoopy3000 @prettymessygurl @spideyparkerstark @fanfic-4-you @lexshead @officiallyunofficialperson @mannien @whitewolfandthefox @melodiclovesong @bizzlepotter @localfangirlx @xxpeachyxo @acceptance07 @witchything @witchything @swaggyspiderman @localfangirlx @queengemsworld @liberty01 @stiles-banshees @itsjusttor @stretchkingblog97 @annathesillyfriend @dangerousluv1 @tomshufflepuff @thewayilookatbacon @petersdiaries @emjaywrites @swaggyspiderman @infamousmany @jungeunave @bullshitstars23 @ispiderdudei @calhtlland @literalfsngirltrash @quacksonhq @it-is-rebel-owl-ma-dudes @desir-ae @pxkajesus @unbelievableholland @peterporkpie @justanotherusername80 @smolpeachees @thenoddingbunny-blog @quackeroos @spideyyeet @astoldbydanid @hollandcreep @itscaminow @milly7110 @iriaaarb @laurieteddy @rubberducky-jrr @rebekkah4766 @farfromtom @fancyxholland @seaveyheartful @oh-whatabeautiful-parker @coveredinthemessimade @shameless-self-promo-of-a-shrub @dreaming-lia @thatdamjoke @annathesillyfriend @love-sick-blues @witchything
#tom holland#tom holland x reader#perfidy#new series#tom holland au#tom holland x you#tom holland x y/n#tom holland and you#tom holland blurb#enemies to lovers#tom holland smut#tom holland imagine#tom holland fluff#tom holland angst#tom holland writing#tom holland series#tom holland fanfic#tom holland fanfiction#tom holland ff#tom holland story#tom holland serie#tom holland imagines
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“My Girl Who’s Not Really My Girl, But Is My Girl Anyway.”
The Pacific One Shot
Summary: Snafu opens up to the guys and tells them about you, how you two are hook up buddies, and he ended up falling in love with you before enlisting in the war. After he returns home, you two make it official.
Pairing: Merriell “Snafu” Shelton x Fem!Reader
Non Requested
Tags: swearing, ethnic slurs, smoking, my shitty attempt at writing implied smut (not too detailed), mentions of war violence
Word Count: 1,753
Author’s Note: snafuuuuu!! i don’t write smut as its stated in my rules, but i thought i’d give this one a try lmfao and verdict: i’m not continuing on doing so because to me writing smut doesn’t suit me. likes/reblogs/feedback needed & appreciated <333
THE boys ganged up on Peck - but for a good reason. Peck was a man who mesmerizingly gazes at a photo of a chorus girl he met and fell in love with while his wife waits for him to come home every day, and is also the man who had gotten their mortar rounds with his own ripped poncho, resulting in getting a fellow marine killed after running to retrieve new ones.
Snafu was the first one to call him out for it. When it came to mentioning girls and whether or not each of them had one, Snafu was definitely going to be next to at least mention a name, or coat himself with a comment, and so he did.
“I don’t care what you think!” Peck exclaimed, annoyed by everyone, especially Snafu. “It’s not like you wouldn’t do the same.”
“Oh?” Snafu said, grinning. “I got a girl waitin’ for me to come home back in Louisiana.”
“Really?” Eugene raised his brow, showing a hint of curiosity that his friend never opened up about it until now. “You’ve never mentioned her before.”
He shrugged. “Nah. Well, she’s my girl who’s not really my girl, but is my girl anyway,” Snafu paid no mind to the twisted confused looks on everyone’s faces, he just continued lighting his cigarette with his filthy hands completely worn from the battle.
“What does that even mean? Is she your girl or not?” Jay D’Leau asked.
“We just fuck around, but we’re not together,” Snafu spoke with the cigarette lit in his mouth.
“Not surprised,” Leyden says.
“Fuck’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means it’s not like you could hold down a girl for more than a week,” Peck says.
“You don’t got a say in shit, Peck. You carry a photograph of a Chorus broad while your wife dreads the day you die in the hands of a fuckin’ Jap,” he snaps. “I’m the luckiest son’a’bitch there ever was.”
“What’s her name?” Hamm asks.
THE tiny storage closet could fit up to only two people at a time, one if they were to bend over to get a hold of supplies from the shelves and bottom drawers. In that particular night was that storage closet used as a place of privacy for the extroverted Snafu, named Merriell back in Louisiana, and his girl who’s not really his girl, but is his girl anyway: you. Y/n.
People would have definitely heard you, whether they were walking past or were simply far away inside any seminar. The door to the closet was literally being pounded on by your back hitting against it with such force, after all. As for Merriell, he couldn’t give two shits. He’d let all of Louisiana hear you to let them know you belonged to him at that moment.
“You’re way too good at that,” you caught your breath moments after, straightening your dress despite its now developed wrinkles. Your hair was no longer neat and styled, but you did your best to fix it without a mirror.
“You’re experienced and lustful when you know what you’re doing,” he said so confidently.
“So when are you leaving?”
“Next week. Time flies when you’re having fun,” Merriell put his shirt on, exposing a bit of his chest from the buttons down, and realized you weren’t paying attention to his answer. “Ya hair’s fine, girl.”
You rolled your eyes. “I don’t wanna walk out there and catch people staring at me, wondering what the hell happened to mess up my hair.”
“Oh they’ll definitely know what happened,” Merriell smirks. “They’re gonna know you walked inside a closet and got drilled by Snafu Shelton until the cows came home.”
You chuckled. “Snafu? Are you sure you want people to go along with that nickname?”
He grins. “As long as I go along with it first.” He tightened his belt, shuffling a bit around the enclosed space of the storage closet.
You ran your hands down his chest. “I’ll write to you.”
Snafu chuckles. “Don’t get serious on me now. I’ll be fine. And don’t write to me,” he then went ahead to button his shirt.
You frown. “Why?”
“It’s a waste of paper.”
“Don’t you wanna keep in touch? Or don’t tell me, you’re planning your proposal to some girl up north?”
“No girl. But there’s nothing we have for each other but a good fuck, that’s all.” And he opens the door, letting you walk out first. He followed you behind, wishing he could hold your hand.
OK. Perhaps that was a lie. He saw you more than a good fuck. He saw something in you that gave him a bigger motivation to make it to the end of the war, to do his part and come back home. He was gonna miss catching a whiff of your strong perfume that would make him cough and crinkle his nose from his sinuses deteriorating. He was gonna miss how your hair was in his hand as he played with it while cuddling at a movie theatre.
He was gonna miss you.
NIGHT fell when Snafu hopped off the train. Louisiana was still the way it was when he had left it. The same old calls from food stands, chatter from one group to another. It was nothing new, but it was home.
He stopped to take a moment first. He didn’t want to wake up Eugene, who had been fast asleep in his seat. Knowing he had something to say before bidding a farewell to his friend, he bit his tongue and kept walking towards the exit.
Snafu, of course, didn’t expect to have anyone wait for him at the station. No family, no friends, no girl. So... what now? He thought. Just find yourself an old man as your chauffeur home, grab a beer and a bowl of peanuts.
“Damn, you look like a lost puppy, Snafu.” Snafu froze in his tracks. He shifted his weight from his duffel bag slung over his shoulder to turn himself around, to find you standing out from the walking crowd.
A sight for sore eyes.
“Shit, you’re here. As loyal as they come!” A smirk appeared on his face due to the surprise unexpected surprise, even referring to him as “Snafu”.
“You really think I wouldn’t be here waiting for your ugly ass to come home?” you teased.
“That’s four years of waiting,” Snafu points out. “Maybe five. Shit, you are loyal as they come.” You smile, your eyes twinkling like Christmas was happening way too early near the end of August.
“I have my parents’ car. They told me to bring it back by nine o’clock. I just want them to give me a later curfew, y’know? At least now that you’re home, I have a better reason to borrow it more often.”
“Well all I wanna do is pop a cold one once I stretch my fucking legs. I felt sick from the train ride home.”
“Motion sickness? It’s just one way.”
“A mixture of smoke and onions stunk up the whole boxcar.”
You made a face at that comment, and walked Snafu to your car. He stayed in the passenger seat even though you had pulled up to the house and shut off the engine. You both sat in silence for a moment.
“Should I even ask how service was?”
Snafu answered your question by changing the subject. “I really missed you, y/n.”
Cocking a brow, you gave him a look. “You insisted for us to not write to each other.”
“I missed you, whether we wrote to each other or not.” Snafu looks ahead of the night through the opened car window. “It was hell out there. I felt like all of Louisiana could hear it. But I knew I would come home to see that pretty lil’ ass of yours again.”
You chuckle. “Snafu-”
“Merriell.”
You frown. “I thought that’s your name now.”
“It is... but when you call me by my Christian name, you chase the loud noises away.” It didn’t matter if that was a metaphor or if he was starting to hear things that could cause a trigger in his senses.
Either way, you just had to ask, “Merriell, is everything right?”
Snafu- Merriell- looked at you. “Yeah. I mean, I think so. Y/n, I think I’m in love with you. Is that all right?”
“Anything that’s been goin’ on between us is just fine, Merriell Shelton.”
“I’ve been in love with you ever since we started foolin’ around. I didn’t think much of it. I always thought a new broad would occupy my thoughts a week after, but each week passes and all I did was look forward to seeing you and you only.”
Sighing, you take his hand that was rested on his leg. Merriell came to realization that this was the first time you two ever held hands without it leading to sex right after. Physical intimacy, indeed. “Merriell, I had a feeling our hookups would turn out into something more.”
“Really?” he asks.
“We were there for each other no matter what. It’s like I found my ride or die - y’know before you rode out of America for the war trying not to die.”
Merriell stroked your hand with his thumb, his eyes locked onto yours. “You were always my girl. Someone special.”
“I wasn’t really your girl to begin with,” you laughed. “But I also wasn’t anyone else’s, either.” Merriell leaned in, kissing you deeply. None of you pulled away until you had to catch a breath. “We waited a long time to do this again.”
Merriell leaned in again, closer this time that he could go on top of you. He whispered against your lips. “And thank Jesus H. I’m back.”
You both kissed for a couple of minutes. It stopped abruptly when you remembered where you two were at the moment. “Shit, sorry. My dad could have opened the blinds. You should come inside for dinner. My mother would be thrilled to see you in a uniform.”
“Shit, I’m already meeting your folks?” he curls his lips to a nervous grin. “I know damn well ya Dad’s gonna stare me down across the dinner table.”
“As long as you don’t tell him that I call you daddy, too, then you’ll be fine.” You earned a laugh from Merriell Shelton, and you two got out of your car and both walked up to the front steps, holding your boyfriend’s hand.
THE END
#snafu shelton one shot#snafu shelton imagine#snafu shelton x reader#snafu shelton#the pacific one shot#the pacific imagine#the pacific x reader#the pacific#the pacific fic#snafu shelton fic#reader insert#one shot#imagine#mk's faves
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HellO!!
Wow okay so it has been 2 years (almost 3)?? I feel like Tumblr is a very different place now and 3 years a lot of time so if you’re wondering who the fuck this even is popping up on your timeline I FULLY understand SCROLL ON MY FRIEND
If you’d like to continue reading an extremely long and jumbled stream of consciousness, keep goin under the cut
I’ve been wanting to post an update like this for a while, but it’s been really hard for me to sit down and write something because of how disconnected I am at this point to the Haikyuu community, and how guilty I was feeling for just sort of..leaving abruptly? But I signed into my account recently and realized that after being inactive for years I was still getting the kindest, most warm hearted messages- not just about art, but people saying they missed me popping up on their feed, that wherever I was, they hoped I was doing well, or that I was happy, and folks just checking in and genuinely concerned and wondering if I was okay. I also realized that it was pretty uncool of me to just sort of peace out like that without an explanation, so I thought I owed you all at least that much.
*Things are about to get a little sad here (just a warning, in case you’re not feeling up for that)*
Basically, around the time I left, a very close childhood friend of mine passed away in a very tragic and unexpected accident. She was like a sister to me, someone who was always there and was always supposed to be there- we grew up together, shared so many first experiences side by side, and of course we annoyed the shit out of each other to no end. She was supposed to be there for my other firsts, but now I have to do them alone. Losing her broke me like nothing I’ve ever felt in my entire life. The pain was both terrifying and debilitating, and I had to take a break from EVERYTHING for a while. I went backpacking for a month in the woods with a couple of friends to get away, no service or anything, completely detached from everything and days of just walking, eating, sleeping, and being in nature. It was very healing. And I guess I never really came back.
This blog was a safe and happy escape for me, a place to just have some laughs and fun, and that’s what I wanted it to be for everyone else. My life on social media was always pretty separate from my real life (though y’all got a weird ol chunk of that in the tags), but this especially had no place on my account. I didn’t want to bring something so unpleasant and painful into my safe space, but that resulted me in completely abandoning this blog altogether since that loss is something I’m still learning to cope with.
I am finally feeling ready now so I’m here to say: I am okay!! I’m still picking myself back up, but I’ve come such a long way. I’ve been seeing a therapist for almost 2 years now who’s helped me deal with not only the grief of losing my friend but making sense of past traumas I’ve experienced and teaching me to learn how and why I’m feeling the things that I do. I’m still the same fucking weirdo with maybe a bit more emotional depth. I’m now a full-time freelance animator and illustrator, and currently thinking about making the jump into comics!! And you know what, I don’t think any of that would have happened had it not been for the wonderful experience I’ve had on here.
Concerning the future of this account and contents: I guess it goes without saying but Full Eyes Full Hearts is officially being discontinued- thank you for the love and support for this comic, even if it was short lived. I know how frustrating it is to become invested in a story only for it to be discontinued, so I am sorry for those of you who were so looking forward to it. But here is a big
*SPOILER ALERT*
They love each other. They always loved each other. WHAT A TWIST THAT IS HUH I BET YOU DID NOT SEE THAT ONE COMING??????
*END OF EXTREMELY HUGE SURPRISING SPOILER*
I have no current plans to return to this account, but as Justin Bieber once said, “never say never.” Who knows, maybe someday I’ll get back into haikyuu (I heard my BOYY came back in some of the latest chapters and if there is oikawa content to consume I WILL consume it), maybe I’ll join another fandom? Maybe this brief resurfacing will awaken the tumblr child inside of me. Even I don’t know. For now though, I’ll be doin my own thing, working on my own projects and maybe one day you’ll find my work again!
I’ll also be popping in and out in the next week or so in case anybody has any questions or comments or wants to talk, ANYTHING
The world is wild right now, so I also just want to send some love to everyone. Things are not always happy, and that’s okay. Something that my friend taught me that I hold dear to this day is that: it’s important to laugh, and play, and cry when you’re sad, and just enjoy all the bad and good the world has to offer you. Because feeling means that you're alive.
I cannot thank everyone enough for the love and support you’ve given for me and my art, my mutuals for being there to inspire me and teach me and push me to do more, honestly I would not be where I was today without any of that. I never took art seriously until I realized how much I enjoyed it on here. Maybe that sounds silly to some people that Tumblr Dot Com changed the course of my life, but it really did.
Thank you!!
#asks#replies#a whole big life update#did yall think i wouldnt have something#extremely weird to say here in the tags after an uncharacteristically serious message#wrong#i had a dream last night that my butthole disappeared#and i looked at my arm and realized i was growing a new butthole on my arm#and when I woke up I though for a solid 5 seconds i was actually growing a butthole on my arm#it was the most confusing and concerning 5 seconds of my life#happy to report there is no asshole growing from my arm
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Another DC TA Marinette | #2
*So I’m still not good at fighting sequences, so if the fight scene towards the end seems off and not quite right, I’m sorry. Also if you asked to be tagged and don’t see your name please tell (DM) me so that I can add you to the next part. I’m aiming for at least 5 parts for this version, so we shall see how this will go.
Part 1 | Part 2 (here) |
Part 2: Dupont Meet Gotham
Caline was very, very sorry for her class. They haven’t been in Gotham for a single day and Lila’s already causing trouble. The trouble that cannot be fixed if something goes wrong here. There was no Hawkmoth to save her or to validate her emotions. It was no secret that Caline has Marinette on speed dial, but she knew how much the graduate loves her time away from this class. Maybe it was best to bring Marinette in and give the class a shock, but it may be too late for that.
“No, no, I’m Damian Wayne’s girlfriend, there must be a special or something for your boss’ heir.” Lila tries to spin her web of lies to the barista as the class gathers around at a nearby cafe.
The barista stares boringly at the Italian native waiting for her to make up her mind and order already.
“Look girly, you’re holding up the line. We don’t do specials for Wayne’s here, and if you’re truly Damian Wayne’s girlfriend then you would know that.” The barista states gesturing to the long line full of Dupont’s students and actual customers.
Lila’s eyes began to get teary-eyed, “I will have you know…”
“Lady, if you don’t order something in the next five seconds, you will be kick outta here.” The barista firmly states glaring at Lila with no room for negotiations.
Lila scoffs and runs into Alya’s waiting arms, crying her eyes out. Alya glares at the barista, who gave zero fucks about what just happened and takes the order of the next person.
“Shh...everything will be okay, Lila. Besides, don’t you have that date tonight with your boo?”
Lila sniffles a laugh and nods. Oh, how she has them deeply entangled in her web. “Then let this one incident go and let’s go out the strip, you can spend some of my earning for ice cream or something.”
Caline along with everyone (meaning two people, maybe four people) in the Marinette protection squad could do is either roll their eyes or shake their heads.
Chloe with her coffee in hand scoffs at the scene in front of her and looks over to Adrien. “At least she’s not hanging onto you every second of the day.” She jokes remembering the times when Lila’s lies were small and surrounding around the Agreste name.
Adrien softly groans, “Don’t remind me. For she had to be my date to one of my father’s fashion shows which were quite weird considering that I was already with Luka when it happened.”
“Yeesh,” Chloe grimace at the thought of that situation. Her phone buzz signaling an incoming message. It’s from Marinette.
“Bug is texting. I’m surprised she didn’t send it to the group chat.” Chloe states before taking a sip of her drink and opening the message.
Multi-Bug: Hey did you get to Gotham, alright?
Melitta Bee: Yea, y weren’t u w/ us?
Multi-Bug: You’ll see why soon ;)
Multi-Bug: Anywho, how’s the class goin?
Melitta Bee: Gettin worse by the min
Multi-Bug: It will be good soon
Chloe scoffs at the message and shakes her head. “Bug will be the death of me., literally.” She groans opting to not reply to the message.
“What did she say?” Adrien asks keeping a firm eye on Lilia, looking to see if she does anything stupid to get them killed.
“You know how cryptic she can be. All I got from that was that everything will be fine. Like how she’s going to get here? Seriously, this trip is utterly ridiculous, ridiculous.” Chloe vents to the model.
Adrien nods, but then quickly nudges Chloe seeing that Lila is heading there way.
“Oh look, trouble.” Chloe jokes as Lila stands very close to the two blondes.
“Do you always complain about stuff, Chloe. I only came here to befriend you seeing that Mari isn't here to corrupt you.” And there goes the dramatics.
“The only thing that is corrupted is you and this fucking class.” Chloe turns around, grabbing Adrien’s hand, and walk out of the cafe.
Chloe B. @queenbeeyellow Hey, wish @mdcfashion is here with us. It’s boring here w/ only @adrienagreste
Attach is an image of Chloe and Adrien in front of the cate wearing sunglass and making funny hand gestures towards the camera. It was clear that it was a selfie.
----------------
Marinette smiles at the tweet before returning her attention back to the Headmaster of Gotham Academy, Mr. Collingwood .
“Miss Dupain-Cheng, where are your key cards for access to the building of both here and to your class’s residential stay. Will you be joining them at the hotel or be staying with Mr. Wayne?”
“I’ll be staying with Mr. Wayne, Mr. Collingwood .” She answers with a soft smile.
The headmaster nods and leans back into his chair.
“I’m I required to participate in class sessions as a student or am I just there to observe?” It was an honest question seeing that she is the teacher assistant rather than a student.
“That would depend on your class’ homeroom teacher. It is most likely that you and that teacher’s T.A. would work together and demonstrate whatever projects are and hand out paperwork.” He answers clasping his hands together as his focus remains on Marinette.
Marinette nods and takes the small stack of supplies into her arms.
Marinette: I have gotten everything ready
Marinette: Everything should be set for Monday. I’ll see you then.
Mme. Bustier: Oh thank you, Marinette.
Mme. Bustier: Your classmates will be ecstatic to know that you’ll be here.
Marinette: I doubt that.
Caline Bustier closes her messenger app and turns to the class and gasps. The core Lila group is missing. No longer in the cafe, just great, great. They barely know their surrounding area despite what Lila said about being here, but if that was true it wasn’t recently. Places change and Gotham is no different.
“Chloe, Adrien, do you know where the core group went?” Caline asks, turning her attention to the two blondes drinking, perhaps coffee, maybe even tea.
Chloe shrugs while Adrien shakes his head unsure how to answer. It was no secret that the dislike the Lila group.
“First day here and I’ve already lost some teens.” Caline huffs and walks out of the cafe to find her so-called perfect students.
“Did she look panic to you?” Adrien asks setting his drink down.
Chloe nods, “Should we go help?”
“It’ll lessen her panic attack later.” Adrien agrees as the two of them get up and follow their teacher.
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Tina @thepinkmistress #anotherdayingotham so apparently Two-Face has a bunch of foreigners held at gunpoint. They’re officially now apart of Gotham
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With Lila and her small crew of loyal followers, they were just stirring up trouble. It all started when Alya offered to take Lila out to the strip for shopping not realizing how dangerous it was to be. Well, it’s not like they cared. To them, this was a vacation with added on classes.
“Oh, I can’t believe my Damibear texted me saying that he was excited that I was back in town. We can finally rekindle that long lost love we had.” Lila gossips about as the two were entering a nearby storefront.
“Girl, you’ve waited long enough, let’s go prep you for your man,” Alya exclaims dragging the twin tail girl further into the store. Nino unsure why he is with them just sighs and looks for something to give to Alya as he wasn’t able to for their anniversary.
“What do you mean, he doesn’t have a discount here?” Oh great, here we go again.
“Look, lady, Damian Wayne may be a big name here, but we don’t do discounts for people like him.” The store attendant spoke up about rubbing her hands against her face.
“Surely, he would have a tab open or something. He knows this is one of my favorite stores to shop in when I’m in town.”
“Uh...we just opened our stores, like, two years ago. That and we’re strictly located here and in Metropolis.”
Lila pouts and begins to throw a fit. If only, Hawkmoth was here.
“Girl. I sure this is some kind of mishap. I’ll pay for the clothes and then we can go sightseeing in this part of town.” Alya offers, showing her a credit card in her hand.
Lila squeals and jumps into Alya’s arms. Little did she know that it was actually Nino’s credit card instead of Alya’s. Alya’s parents were very concern about their daughter’s spending habits and put a cap on it that she clearly maxed out before the trip.
Ivan walks over to Nino seeing as the poor DJ was lonely and that Mylene was trapped in the web of lies, well he is too, but he hides it well under the impression that it’s to make Mylene happy.
“You okay?” Ivan asks catching the Dj’s attention.
Nino grunts and shakes his headphones off. “No--yes-maybe, I don’t know.” He admits staring off to the empty space that was his girlfriend and her best friend.
Before Ivan could answer, a loud scream can be heard from outside the store.
“Shit, do not leave this place.” The store attendant gasps, only to be ignored by the remaining students of Dupont. The store attendant sighs and ducks behind the desk.
“Lila!” Alya screeches.
----------------
Miraculously Safe GC:
Melitta: How quickly can you lose a spider?
Ryouko: Quick why?
Musical Viper: That depends, when did you see the spider? How big was it?
Melitta: Mme. B lost the spider and her trapees
Multi-Bug: WHAT!!!
PunNoir: Yeah, she lost them so now we’re out searching for them.
Melitta: It’s not like they went that far?
Multi-Bug: You’re in Gotham, crime central, and she lost some students!!!
Ryouko: I’m sure everything will be fine, Bee.
Musical Viper: Keep your eyes open, Punn, if things do go wrong we’re only a plane ticket away.
Melitta: SHIT!! Lila started up another mess.
Muli-Bug: WHAT!!!
Chloe and Adrien quickly hide their phones and disappear behind a building, hoping that the shadows cover them from the watchful eyes of Two-Face and his minions.
Mme. Bustier apparently didn’t get that message and wounded up wrapped into the mess her students have caused.
Two-Faced stares menacing at the teens as his men surround the group all at gunpoint.
Lila being the idiot she is started crying how her Damibear would pay him, save her even. The man was not swayed.
“Clean, we shut the girl up; scarred, we kill her right here and now.” He murmurs drawing out his lucky coin to do his bidding. “However, we don’t have much time. That bats would be here any minute.”
As Two-Face explains his plan to his men, one of the guns goes off. Everyone shrieks in terror. Alya stares, frozen as her phone lays died with a bullet hole on the ground. Blood seeps through her hands.
“Boss, she was filming us.” One of the henchmen explains with steam oozing out of his gun.
“Dumb girl, did she really think it was smart to film right in front of us. At least be like every citizen here and do it in secret.” Two-Face groans, gesturing for the men to fire a new round.
Everything freeze, while Lila screams her head off naming off every possible hero she could think of.
----------------
Marinette runs through the city at a hasty pace. She’s maneuvering her way through the large crowd of citizens all trying to get away from the lastest villain attack down near the shopping strip. Marinette comes to a barreling stop.
She could hear the cries of Lila Rossi from a block away and it was painful to hear. Her naming every hero only to get knocked upside the head by one of the henchmen. This will not look good for the exchange program in the future. Mme. Bustier tries—and fails—to negotiate with Two-Face.
Two-Face keeps playing with his coin deciding what misery he shall put these foreigners through just to grab the Bat’s attention. Then again would he even care, that just means new toys for him and his men.
Marinette looks around searching for a distraction. Nothing comes up. She needs to think fast seeing as the Batfam and they are currently being held up. Not that the public needs to know that. She got it. Getting closer to the range. She then pulls out her traveling yoyo and readies a swing.
Just as Two-Face flips his coin, Marinette throws the yoyo.
The yoyo knocks the coin away, just as the string wraps around it as she pulls back. The Parisians students look up hoping to see a familiar hero in red and black. They saw no one.
“Find my coin you fools and kill however took the dang thing.” Two-Face shouts out in a fit of rage.
Marinette yelps and disappears around the corner. She finds Chloe and Adrien hiding spot not far from her. Unwrapping the coin from the string, she tosses it up into the sky and takes off before gunshots are heard near her way.
“Thank god you guys are okay.” She pants out, scaring Chloe in the process as the Bee miraculous holder shrieks out and attempts to roundhouse kick the graduate. “Chloe! It’s me.”
“Multi?” Chloe gasps out in shock as she finally takes in the appearance of her leader. Marinette wasn’t in her usual Paris getup but instead in a pair of black leggings, an over-the-shoulder tee with all the Batfamily emblems. Ankle boot thick heels, good for running. The biggest difference being her hair as it’s half up and half down with pink lowlights covering the once fully black, nearly blue hair. “Damn, hun, you look fine.”
Marinette chuckles, “I’m sure ‘Gami would love to hear you say that.”
Chloe shrugs as Adrien comes out of his shocked stance. “Mari, what? How? When?”
“At ease Chaton, I’ve been here in Gotham for the past few weeks. However, that is not our issue right now. The class is being held hostage by Two-Face, a villain with a mess-up sense of justice. An excellent attorney but he has a few loose screws. I bought the class time from being publicly executed for the Bats to get here. I just hope that they do it quickly.
From the corner of her eye, Marinette could spot the familiar colors, that she very much hate but haven’t gotten the time to screech at them for, appearing on the rooftops of a nearby building.
“Thank kwami, they’re here.”
“Who’s here?” Adrien and Chloe chimes together. Marinette smiles at the two with a twinkle in her eyes.
“Two-Face let the students go?” Batman demands, appearing on the scenes with little to no room for negotiations.
“And where’s the fun in that, Batman?” Two-Face asks as a new coin is placed into his hand. It may not be the one that Marinette stole but it will do. “Clean says I leave, but scarred says I will kill every one of them.” He tosses the coin up.
The coin lands in his hand, lifting his hand up it shows the scarred face of the coin. “Oh look at that, they’re dead anyway.”
Immediately, the henchman readies there guns only for bat-a-rangs to knock them out of the out of their hands.
“They never come alone do they?” Two-Face mutters as Robin and Nightwing jumps down into the scene.
Robin with no hesitation attacks and disarm whoever comes his way. Batman could only facepalm seeing his son basically ignore the plan. Nightwing shrugs and joins in. This only left the big Bat and Two-Face at a stand-off. Two-Face readies his own gun and shoots a couple of rounds at the dark knight.
It wasn’t long before the fight ends and the paramedics come in to help the injured students. Marinette motions for Chloe and Adrien to follow. She walks over to Robin with her arms folded against her chest.
“You shouldn’t be here.” He whispers to her when she was in earshot. Marinette huffs and rolls her eyes before playing the average Batfamily fangirl.
“Oh my god, Batman, you saved my class!” She squeals. Her voice catches the attention of her conscious classmates.
“Marinette?!” They shout in disbelief as Mme. Bustier smiles in relief.
The paramedics gave Mme. Bustier a slip as the class minus Aly and Lilia, both who are still in custody of the paramedics, run over to their missing classmate.
Marinette quickly gives Robin a knowing look before focusing her attention on the class.
It wasn’t long before she’s surrounded by an overwhelming amount of questions. So, now they care about her.. Yikes. Marinette turns to Chloe and Adrien for help. Chloe scoffs and shoves through the class.
“Leave the girl alone, besides you just went through something most people would consider traumatizing but knowing us this is nothing compare to dealing with akumas.”
Marinette smiles at Chloe.
The class disperses.
“Maybe it’s time for us to head back to the hotel.” Mme. Bustier pipes up knowing full well that she’ll have to report this incident to the board under the predicament that it was due to Lila’s compulsive lying that put them through struggle.
----------------
At the Dupont’s homestay--well it was more of a hotel than anything, Lila and Alya were ushered to their rooms while the rest of the class goes to comfort the two in the best way possible. While that was going on. Marinette decided to have a meeting with Caline about the issue.
“She can’t be alone in this city.”
“I know that, Marinette.”
“On a different note, I’ll be attending your class session at the academy.”
“That’s good, isn’t it? “I suppose, but it’ll be slightly harder to keep my status as a lycee graduate under wraps.”
“You’re what!” The familiar sound of Chloe’s shrill voice echos in the room.
“Hi Chloe,” Marinette meekly greets one of her best friends.
“Don’t hey Chloe, me missy. When were you going to tell us that you graduate?”
Caline took this moment to exit the room leaving the two teens to their demise.
“Do you want the real answer or the answer that will satisfy you?”
Chloe glares down at the teacher assistant.
Marinette sighs, “I’ve been done with lycee since last quarter. Instead of making a big deal of graduating early, I volunteered to be a teacher assistant for the rest of the year while I start my university courses online.”
Chloe looks down before hugging Marinette. “Thank you,” She whispers into the graduate’s neck. “You could have left Adrien and me to the spider but you chose not to. Thank you, Multi for everything.”
Marinette blinks the tear away and returns the hug.
Marinette left the hotel with the promise of catching up tomorrow when they have class. The only thing good that came through was that she didn’t have to deal with Alya or Lila that night, the next day, she wasn’t so sure yet.
----------------
“That was really stupid of you, Angel, to get involve like that,” Damian states bringing his girlfriend into his arms when she’s safely located in his bedroom.
Marinette giggles and kisses his cheek. “It wasn’t like I was directly involved., my Prince.” She whispers into his ear. A faint pink blush against Damian’s cheeks.
“If it wasn’t for Robin and the rest, you could have been killed if Two-Face found out that it was you that took his coin.”
“You know I’m stronger than what I look. Besides, I have better things to worry about than a villain that isn’t my foe.”
Damian groans, “Angel, you will be the death of me.”
Instead of speaking, Marinette kisses him, allowing him to pull them onto the bed.
“Use protection!” One of his brothers shout out, it was most likely Jason.
“Kill him in the morning, when I’m not around.” Marinette murmurs before preceding with their original plan.
----------------
The next morning, the Dupont class along with Marinette stands outside the booming gates of Gotham Academy.
“I wonder if my Damibear is here, too. The last I heard he was overseas on a family vacation.” Lila blissfully wonders to get the reassurance from her loyal friends.
Marinette rolls her eyes and looks to the person walking towards the gate.
Manette @gothamsfashionsense Hanging out in GA for the next couple of days. Does anyone want to join?
In the image attached is a photo of a coffee cup in one hand with the gates of Gotham Academy in the background.
As of 12/9/19, the Tag List is CLOSED
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#daminette#marinette x damian#teacher assistant Marinette AU#teacher assistant au#maribat#dc x mlb#ml x dc#dc crossover#ml crossover#miraculous ladybug fanfic#miraculous ladybug
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