#your para gave me so many feels especially the first one

[stoopid-turtle]

I've seen people theorize as part of the devil's timeline (which I don't really subscribe to, but am curious about) that ggdd were pretending not to know each other beforehand when they started filming CQL and that that would explain why they got more familiar over time but also so quickly in the BTS. To me this would explain a couple things (like sharing phones so soon) but creates so many more questions that I have a hard time buying it. Mainly: I 100% understand why they wouldn't want to tell fans/the world at large any more details about their personal lives/relationship, since it's not our business, but I can't figure out why they'd like... act in front of the whole rest of the cast as strangers. I don't *think* it would make it seem like one gave the other any advantage in the casting process, but what do I know? And I can't think of a lot of other reasons for acting that elaborate/long-term. I was wondering if you had any takes on this?

Also! I wanted to say thanks again for your posts so far and I respect that it's not something you plan to keep doing, but I was (hoping) wondering if you were thinking about sticking around in the fandom as more of a spectator? I'm also a new turtle as of like 5 months ago so it's nice not to be the only one still going 🤯 over some of the BTS in 2023 when it's ancient news to everyone else. Thanks again for your hard work on your posts and timeline!

Hi!

Do they share phones really early? The earliest I saw was 7.7, though I'm not especially eagle-eyed. Beyond that instance and dd using gg's phone while the cast ate lunch on 8.2, I didn't notice either of them sharing phones in the videos I saw.

I guess I'm the odd one out bc I don't think they became familiar unusually fast. It seems like a reasonable timeline for the age they're at, from my experience. So I don't see the need to have an explanation for that since I don't see anything out of the norm in how their relationship progresses.

That's probably why I take the Devil's Timeline as interesting speculation but not much more.

But your main point is definitely a sticking point for me too.

Spitballing it, maybe they wanted to hide the nature of their relationship at first until they realized it was a gay-friendly set. But even then, why act like they don't know each other at all? They have a reasonable explanation for how they'd be acquainted: they met on DDU a year before. I'm not sure why they'd play coy.

Of course, behind the scenes industry stuff is always a wild card. We don't know what we don't know, and maybe gg and dd had a good reason to pretend they didn't know each other at all. I'm not well-versed enough in c-ent to even have a guess as to what that might be, but I assume it's possible.

At the same time, they later seem open about their relationship on set, even having couple fights and flirting while surrounded by cast and crew. So why hide things at the beginning?

I've been watching through some more of the daily bts on another playlist, and gg and dd act how I'd expect 2 reserved people to act on the first few days of working together. Of course, that's real subjective to assess, so somebody else could come away with a completely different impression of how they're acting. But, personally, I don't see anything that needs any explanation.

re: your second para: I'll probably go back to lurking. I have a primary tumblr acct that I use to lurk on a bunch of fandoms. I already followed the bjyx tags and a lot of the turtles on that acct before setting this up. I definitely plan to keep up with the boys, but I don't foresee posting that much in the future.

(I reserve the right to give in to my impulses and hunker down for the long-haul, though.)

I always get to a fandom late! I missed all the excitement when the bts first came out, but I still feel hype when I come across new-to-me stuff. I'm happy to enthuse with others!

[lizzypotter14]

I Will Stand By You - Part II

Sorry that this took so long but as it is my second baby, and a long one to top it all, I was going back and for in many aspects.  Hope you enjoy it!  Thanks @chelseagirl98 for your support

Warnings:  Angst, fluffy

The car ride to the airport was filled with a comfortable silence.  I can feel DeeDee’s eyes on me but no words coming forward.  Dropping me at the departure gate, she rolled the window down… “Just take care of him…and yourself.  Let me know when you arrive and take the time to be with Chris.  But if you need anything, and I mean anything, I’m a call away”,

“I will.  Love you, D”.

“Love you too”, the car moves forward leaving behind to take my flight.  

The waiting was not long but at the same time, long enough for me to browse the social media accounts. The comments towards the Club, the manager and some  specific players were awful and  hurtful. The ones directed at Chris were just spiteful.   My only hope at this point is that he has stopped looking at them; that all the boys are done looking at them.

Finally, I closed all accounts and just waited for the boarding announcement, which came 30 minutes later.   I thanked my lucky stars that DeeDee and I booked my ticket for first class so I could try and sleep throughout the flight, but my mind had other ideas, and after a little more than two hours of tossing and turning, I gave up completely on it.   Instead, I just stared outside the window looking at the endless night in front of me, playing different scenarios on how things could go once Chris and I have an opportunity to talk.

To say that I was exhausted upon arriving will be putting it mildly. Once the plane landed, I turned my phone on and shot a quick text to Andrea, who responded immediately to say that they were waiting for  me at baggage claim.  As I walked in, I got a pleasant surprise.  Waiting for me were Andrea and Kepa, both with identical smiles on their faces.

Andrea was the first one to reach for me and greet me, as Kepa went to retrieve my luggage, after asking which one was mine.  “Hola y/n, como estas?  Me alegra mucho que estes de vuelta con nosotros, aunque detesto las circunstancias en las cuales estas en Londres. (Y/n, hi.  How are you? I’m so glad to have you back with us, even if the reasons for being back in London are not the best), said Andrea giving me one of her trademark hugs.

Suddenly I feel a hug from behind in the form of my favorite goalkeeper.  “Mi turno para saludarla, mi amor.  ¿Como estas, mi niña?  Dormisteis algo en el avión.   Te ves cansada.  Andrea, mi amor, no crees que y/n se ve agotada? (Love, it is my turn to say hi. My little girl, how are you?  Did you take a nap on the plane?  You look tired.  Andrea, love, don’t you think that y/n looks tired?)

But before Andrea could answer him, I just said.  “La verdad? No he podido dormir.   Yo estoy preocupada” (¿“Do you want the truth?  I had not been able to sleep.  I am so worried”)

“Yo sé que estas preocupada, y lo entendemos perfectamente. Pero nosotros estamos preocupados por ti”.  (We understand perfectly well that you are worried.  But we are worried about you too”), said Andrea holding hands with me and guiding me towards the car park with Kepa closed behind.

“Los amo muchísimo.  Gracias a Chris, tengo a los mejores amigos que una chica puede desear.  No importa la distancia, ustedes han sido parte de nuestras vidas desde que empezamos nuestro noviazgo, y todo este tiempo han sido los mejores porristas.  No sé qué haríamos sin ustedes” (“I love you, both, so much.  I gained, thanks to Chris, the best Friends that a girl could ever wish for.   You had been our biggest cheerleaders and had been part of our journey from the start.  No matter the distance”).

“Tú eres especial para nosotros también. Es por esa razón, que te llevaremos a la casa de Chris más tarde. Primero, queremos que descanses, tomes el desayuno con nosotros.  Kai y Sophia se reunirán con nosotros más tarde y después de conversar con ellos, en lo que nos puedes preguntar lo que quieras, te llevaremos a casa de Chris” (“To us, you are special.  And that is why we will take you later to Chris’ house.  First, you will rest, and then eat breakfast with us.  Later, we will meet and talk with Kai and Sophia, during this time you can ask us any questions. After, will drop at Chris”).

“Pero yo quiero ir a verle inmediatamente” (I want to see him now”).

“Lo se.  Pero debes descansar” (“I know, but you need to rest”).

“Kepa, estas ocultando algo?” (“Are you hiding something, Kepa?”)

“Hablaremos en cuanto estemos con Kai y Sophia.  Te lo prometo” (“I promised that we will talk with Kai and Sophia”)

Should I be concerned about it.  Maybe.  But I trust my friends.

“Está bien. Vamos” (“Okay. Let’s go”)

During the drive to Kepa and Andrea’s home, I took the opportunity to send a message to DeeDee and let her know that I arrived fine.  To my surprise, she responded immediately and asked if I was on my way to see Chris for which I responded in the negative.

“What do you mean no?” was the quick reply.

“I looked and felt exhausted due to lack of sleep, so Kepa and Andrea had suggested for me to take some rest at their home before heading to Chris.  That it’s all”.

The dots that appeared on my phone just too quickly disappeared.  When I was about to give the conversation up the dots reappeared and a message followed.

“Y/m…”

“DeeDee…”

“Just rest”.

“Nothing more to say?”

“No.  I promised to butt out and that’s what I am doing.  Just relax, sunshine.  Need you to be in your ‘A’ game”.

“Stop, DeeDee.  You know I value your opinion”.

“And I love you for it, but a promise is a promise.  By the way, do not forget to send a message to your future mother-in-law, and let her know that you are okay”.

“Stop teasing me, and I will.  Also, why are you still awake?”

“Couldn’t sleep either.  But now, that I know you are in safe hands, I will take advantage of this room, and will sleep for a while before heading home”.

“Please sleep well, DeeDee.  Do not drive if you are too tired and send me a message once you get home”.

“Stop worrying about me”.

“Never.  I have to say goodbye for now as we just arrived and need to spend some time with my hosts”.

“Okay but y/n…”                  

“Yes?”

“Nothing.  Just love you”.

“Love you too”.

When I lifted my eyes from the phone, two sets of eyes were staring at me. “Solamente estaba enviándole un mensaje a la hermana de Chris para dejarle saber que llegue bien” (“Just sending Chris’ sister a quick message to let her know of my arrival in one piece”).

“No hay problema.  Vamos a cocinar el desayuno.  Andrea te preparo la recamara de huéspedes.  Toma un baño y ven a buscarnos cuando estes lista” (“No worries. The spare bedroom is set for you so just go ahead and take a shower.  Once you are ready, come and find us as Andrea and I will be getting breakfast ready”).

“Gracias” (Thank you”).

Fifteen minutes later, I was heading to the kitchen.  I arrived quietly and took my time just observing the interactions between the couple.  They were so comfortable with one another and seemed to work in the kitchen like a well-oiled machine.  Andreas’ engagement ring sparkled with the sun streaming through the kitchen window. I always felt drawn to it; daydreaming a little bit about the moment in which will be my hand showing a ring.  A girl can dream.  As they were flipping pancakes and setting some places  on the kitchen island, Andrea noticed my presence at the door.

“Y/n, está lista para desayunar?”  (“Are you ready for breakfast, y/n?”)

“Si, gracias” (“Yes, thank you”), and with that I just sat down next to Andrea as Kepa started dishing the pancakes.

Our conversation flowed as easily as ever. Love that, no matter the distance or the lack of seen each other daily, our friendship was solid.  I normally face time or talk with them once a week.  Christian always finds it so funny that his teammates and partners get a weekly run of my life and that sometimes that cuts his time with him which I simply remind him that isn’t true as our time is more valuable than anything else.

As we were done, I offered to help clean up and do the dishes but was quickly dismissed.

“No.  Solamente ve a descansar.  Te despertaremos en dos horas.  ¿Está bien?” (“Np.  Simply go and rest.  Will wake you in two hours,  Okay?”)

I nodded but before heading to the bedroom, I got on my tippy toes and kissed both Kepa and Andrea.  I knew rest was need it, so it wasn’t a surprise that as soon as my head touched the pillow, I was out.  Next thing I’m aware of is a hand shaking me slightly from my slumber.  I just groaned, “Not now. I just went to sleep. I’m so tired”.

“Mi niña. Es hora de que te despiertes. Sophia, Kai y Andrea están en la sala esperándote’ (“It is time for you to wake up, my little girl. Waiting for us in the living room are Sophia, Kai, and Andrea”)

Stretching, I opened my eyes and simply nodded.  “Dame 10 minutos y allí estaré” (“Just give me 10 minutes and I be right there”).

Kepa just left the room, closing the door behind him.  I took my time and freshened up before heading to see my friends. As I got closer, their conversation seemed to stop altogether.  Sophia and Kai got up from their spots and engulfed me in a heartfelt hug.

“How was your flight?”, ask Sophia.

“It was okay.  My anxiety got the better part of me, and I just want to see Chris.  I’m glad that I had time to rest but I’m ready to go and be with him”.

Kepa and Kai exchanged a quick look between each other, but not quick enough for me not to intercept it.

“Okay boys, what’s with the look?”

“What look? There was no look”, said Kai.

“Kai Lukas Havertz, you are insulting y/n and our intelligence.  We saw the look between Kepa and you.  What going on?”,  said Sophia hitting Kai’s head.

“Ouch, love!  Okay, just hear us out.  Y/n, after your conversation with Kepa, we started observing Chris more closely.  He was extremely quiet and chose to sit down with Hakim on the way back.  At one point, we saw him texting which we assumed was with you, but instead of being his happy self, as he is normally after your calls, he retrieved more into himself. So, we decided to confront  him after we got home”.

“And how it turns out?”

“Well, we went to Chris’ house and talked for a while.  We know he asked you to give him space and…”

“What do you mean Chris asked y/n for space” said Andrea looking between Kai, Kepa and I.

“Mi amor, let Kai finished” said Kepa still looking towards me.

My eyes were down and the hands on my laps kept playing with the hem of my t-shirt .

“Y/n, what are the boys talking about?”, said Andrea sitting next to me and ignoring Kepa.

“H-he said that he doesn’t want to drag anybody with him, especially not me, and that maybe, he needed some space”.

“Are you giving him the space that he is asking for?  Because Kepa and I don’t think that this is what  he really wants or needs”, said Kai kneeling in front of me.

“Well, I just asked him to let me talk with him.  I love him so much and waited so long to be with him to let others dictate things for us.  I know what he is doing and I’m not okay with it”,

“We cannot tell you what to do but we will support you both.  Things are far from great at club level, and I know that the lack of playing time, and the uncertainty of his future at Chelsea is breaking havoc with Chris’ self-esteem.  You don’t have to be a genius to see this.  He is our friend and, if for any reason, he leaves this club, you and he will always be part of us”, said Kai.

“We are not the only ones feeling this way.  Ben, Mason, and Reece are worried and want to be here for you and him. We don’t think that he wants to leave you, he’s just confused and hurt and thinks that he is not good enough, but he is.  He needs you, and you both need to talk, alone, about all this.  Your future, together, depends on it”.

Finally lifting my eyes, I asked to my friends, “can you, please, take me to him?”

“Do you have your key? We don’t have practice today, so you will have all day to talk with him without any interruptions.  We will make sure of it”.

“I do”.                                                                                                                     “Then let’s get your luggage and take you home”.

And with it, my friends took me home.  The girls tried talking with me and offering a distraction but after a while, they gave up completely and just took hold of my hands.  I was scared, nervous , and my anxiety levels were sky high. But above all, I am certain of what needs to be done.  Fighting for us is something that I can do.  We had come a long way, jumped lots of hurdles to be together.  No room for mistakes here.

“Y/n, y/n.  We are here”.

Sure enough, I looked outside, and we parked outside Chris’ house.  Andrea opened her door and we both exited the car. Kai took my luggage from the car’s trunk and handed it to me.

“Do you want any of us to go in with you? I am not 100% sure but he should stills  be asleep”.

“No, Kai.  Thank you. I am okay.  I-I need to do this on my own. Thanks for everything, and just know that that I love you so much.  All of you”

.“Please call us if you need anything or if you need the boys to come and get you” said Sophia holding me tight.

“I will.  I promise, but I am confident that it will not be necessary”.

I waited by the door, luggage in hand, until their car disappeared down the street.  With a deep sigh  I turned the key in and got into the house turning the alarm off in the process.  Leaving my shoes and luggage by the door, I made my way to Chris’ bedroom.

When I opened the door, my  eyes took some time adjusting to the darkness in the bedroom, even if it was noon. During my last  ,  before international break, we installed these new blinds and curtains to block the sunlight. He wanted to get more rest, and these were ideal for him.  Chris was completely wrapped under the blankets, his face the only thing visible. I loved watching Chris sleep because it is the only time in which he is relaxed and at  peace.

Carefully, I made my way into the bedroom, closing the door as quietly as possible.  I laid down facing him and just kept staring at my handsome boyfriend.  Temptation to touch him won over my desire to let him sleep more.  Gently, I move some curls out of his forehead and with featherlike touches, trace the contour of his cheek’s bones, freckles, and lips.  He started twitching and finally his eyes opened, blinking rapidly to adjust.

“I smelled your perfume.  I thought that it was just my mind playing tricks on me, but  you are here”

His voice was raspy, and it was music to my ears.  I love Chris’ voice in the mornings as it is quieter than normal and possesses a hint of sexiness that’s just so him and awakens the butterflies inside me. I continued the exploration of his face before I could find my voice.

“Hi baby”.

“Hi princess”. His right-hand comes from under the duvet and starts tracing my face with his fingers, just like I am doing to him.

“You are not good at following directions, love”

“When it comes to us, I followed my heart, Chris.  You should know that by now”.

He removed his fingers from my face and with both hands rubbed his instead. “What is the time?”

“12:30”

“When did you arrive? Who picked you up from the airport?” asked Chris while fixing the pillows under him, without losing contact with me.

“I took the red eye from La Guardia, and Andrea and Kepa picked me up this morning.  And before you asked, I stayed with them for a few hours to rest prior to coming here”.

“Y/n…”

“Christian…”

Still trying to chase the sleep away from him, Chris sat in bed, back against me.  Slowly he turns and stares at me for a few minutes.  “Why are you here?  I need time to deal with all that is going on and I don’t want you to be a distraction or to be a target for the fans.  Things are out of control at club level, and I don’t need to add more with your presence here”.

Sitting with my legs crossed, I took a deep breath to calm myself before addressing him. I  need to keep myself balanced and my emotions under control.  He is aware of the pain caused by his words, but his demeanor shows no signs of backing away from this.

“Can you listen to me before taking decisions that will affect us deeply, and our possibilities of a future together?”

“Y/n…”

“Can you just listen?  Please”

“Let me take a shower and we can talk in the living room”.

I stared at him and without any further words, removed myself from the bed, opened the bedroom door and exited quietly.  Three steps away from the closed door, I lean against the wall to steady my shaky legs.  I must be stronger than the situation; Chris’ stubbornness is legendary, and I should prepare myself for what is to come.

I headed to the kitchen, and prepared my favorite tea, which was still in the pantry from before.  I lost track of time, simply gazing at the basketball hoop in the backyard, a cup of tea in one hand. But the moment Chris came to the kitchen, I was aware of it. My entire body tingles, it has been like this for a long time, so I just simply turned around and face a showered and cleaned face Christian, leaning slightly against the door frame looking at me like a starve man.

It has been almost two months since we last saw each other face to face. The person in front of me is a shell of the one that was so happy and carefree during the USA matched against El Salvador.  Chris was happy, relaxed, and enjoying the company of teammates, friends, and family. I can’t believe how good he was at covering and hiding things from me.

“Would you like tea or coffee”.

“No, thanks.  I will just get some water”, he said getting into the kitchen and going around me to grab a glass from the cabinet next to me.

“Chris, please talk to me”.

Slowly, he turned around, getting so close to me.  Instead of the warm feeling that I normally associate with it, a coldness took hold of me.

“I don’t want to hurt you or say something that will cause more problems, y/n but I need you to go home.  I need to do this on my own”.

“Let me help you, Chris”.

“How? Do you know how to fix this? Or how can I get more play time on the field? Or to silence the haters?  This club, my childhood dream, is suffocating me.  I don’t need you or my family to help me.  I just need space and time to fix it.  Be worthy again”, and with that he stormed out of the kitchen towards the living room.

My heart shattered.  I gave him a little breathing room before following him.  He was on the couch, head in his hands.  I sat down next to him, trying to put my thoughts in order.

“Christian, I want you to listen.  If, after I talk with you, you still want me gone, I will respect your wishes and give you the space to deal with this situation on your own terms”

.He turns his head around.  I can sense his defenses building up.

“When you asked me to be your girlfriend, a little before the World Cup, our lives were going in opposite directions.  I was worried about the distance, and how things were going to affect us.  I was worried about being hurt by your fans.  But you had an answer for every single one of my fears and concerns.   You told me that together we could do anything, and I believe in that simply because  I believe in you.  I had been in love with Christian, the man, for quite some time, but I am wary of Christian, the footballer”.

“You broke every single one of my walls, and piece by piece made my life a little better, a little brighter.  The night before leaving for your dream of representing your country on the world stage, you took me aside and asked me to trust you, one more time, to give my heart to you with the promise of never break it or cause me pain. You told me that there will be days in which things will get  hard but that together, we could go through them”.

“We had many obstacles, Chris, but that night I made a promise to you. I told you that I will always be there for you, that I will stand by your side, and that together we will navigate the storms that surely will come our way”.

“The more that I am around you, even as we find ourselves separated by distance and our current activities, the more that I love, and the more that my heart is flooded by love for you.  You had made it impossible to live without you”.

Tears started rolling from his and my eyes. I couldn’t continue.  I had laid it all out, and it was his move. I tried to get off the couch, but his hand  was wrapped around my wrist.

“I am so sorry, princess.  I love you so much  and you are right.  We made all those promises, in what feels like a lifetime ago.  I am not a perfect person, but something that I’m sure of is that I have no right to hold you by my side with all the uncertainty that’s surrounding me at this moment.  I will never forgive myself if anything happens to you; that will made the already existing hole inside me, even bigger”.

“Chris, we were friends with no secrets before we started dating. I should not be telling you how important you are, and always will be in my life”.

“As you are mine. In case you didn’t know, you are the reason to keep fighting.  I just feel lost, babe.  I’m falling without a safety net”.

That caused me to catch my breath.  “You are not alone.  But before we can do something about it, I need to ask you an important question.  I will understand and even support, reluctantly, your decision.  What would you like us to do, together, to fix this?  The football part can be revised but your mental health needs to be addressed. I can step away from you if that will help as I want was best for you.

Immediately, Chris shakes his head now.  “I don’t deserve to be with you.  I’m just a complete failure and…

”Kneeling in front of him. I hold his hand, “stop please.  You are not a failure.  Far from it.  Things will get better, and you will silence all your haters. That I know for sure because it is what you do best”.

“And this is one of the many reasons why I love you.  Thank you for believing in me; for being by my side even when I push you away”.

“And that is all that I ask, Chris.  Don’t cast me away. That will destroy me completely.  That will be the fastest way to hurt me”.

Taking me in his arms, he just whispered in my ear “I’m sorry that I hurt you and I making you a solemn promise to be truthful to myself and you for now on.  The best decision I had ever made was the day I listened to my heart and asked you to be mine.  You are my everything, love”.

After a couple of hours talking with one another, we started healing and preparing to tackle the next set of hurdles coming our way.  Chris finally called his parents, assuring them that everything was okay, that I was with him, which his mom already suspected, and that his girlfriend, me, would catch up with them before heading to camp in June for the Nation’s League semi-finals and finals.

Things were not perfect, and his future at Chelsea was still up in the air, but we knew with certainty that working together and talking things out with one another was the key to our success.   

@neverinadream @chelseagirl98 @lovelynikol16 @notsoattractivearenti @thoseboysinblue @swimmingismywholelife @bracedes @pulisicsgirl @mortirolo @masonsrem @masonspulisic

[fasa-umich]

The Origin Story of Tendra || Kendra Le, FASA's 2023-2024 Co-Performance Chair

Hi! My name is Kendra but some of you may have met Tendra… Just FYI, those two are not the same. So, I would like to walk you through my journey being in FASA.

Chapter 1: Twin 1

I want to start by saying, I am not Filipino. I am Vietnamese. Going to UofM I didn’t really know what to expect or what to get involved in. It all started when freshman year I bumped into Ashley, who told me I should join FASA when I had brought up that I was from the Chicago area and did battle during high school. She mentioned that FASA went to Battle the previous year and was planning on taking a trip to UIUC for FACT, which I found really intriguing because many of my friends go there. She really gave me the rundown of how FASA worked and told me to sign up to be in a FAM/LIN and not even knowing what that might’ve meant for me, I trusted her and did it anyway. 

So… My first FASA “event” was actually an afterset at Ashley’s house where a handful of the other freshmen and I showed up for “anything but a cup” and of course… on time. Board was scrambling to set up still and I still remember that night very clearly and Amanda and Celeste showing up as animals hehe. 

At some point, people started mistaking me for Ashley and vice versa for some reason, and either you see the resemblance or you don’t. Regardless, she is still my twin.  But I want her to know  how much I appreciate her for all that she has done for me. 

Sorry Ashley for the rug!

Chapter 2: Twin 2

I pulled up to Halo Halloween with a group of friends dressed as Sanrio characters but little did I know my lineage was also Sanrio characters! 

Fast forward, now, here I am going to FACT with a group of people that I’ve never met before. I hop into the university van and the first thing Emily Paras says is “ I think you’re in my Lin”. Then Nate Tran says, “ I think you’re in my fam!”. Not knowing what any of that means I’m like “Oh, cool,”. This is where I’m sitting in the back seat with Jess and Adrian and they’re CODING. Anyway, we got there and Emily introduced me to Kris. She says “ This is your ate,” and that my lin twin, Sofia, wasn't able to make it because she was sick. Of course I had to stalk her but her following ratio was scary. I took this opportunity to find out more about performances and then joined PCN dances, which was one of the best decisions I’ve made. But also can we take a moment to acknowledge the fact that I won PUSO Merch through their giveaway?!

That night, we had a senior x freshman bonding session and during hot seat, I got asked which senior I was looking forward to getting to know and I said Kris because she’s my ate. 

So real quick shout out to Kris: Thank you Ate Kris for letting me, Sofia, and Jenny spend countless nights and hours at 815 talking about everything and anything. As your double ding, I have looked up to you in so many different ways and you have really made me feel comfortable in sharing whatever it is that I am going through. I can’t express how much of an inspiration you have been and I really hope that we will continue staying in touch. 

Shoutout to all the freshmen that I met here 🥹

Especially Eli who blew up the air mattress and woke up next to a cockroach!

Fast forward again, Kikilan was having their first lin hang at Slurping Turtle! This is where I met Sofia, so I guess we can call her Twin 2! I am going to skip over the lore but who would’ve thought that we would be bonding over being twins! I must say I love all my Kikilan girl bosses.

Chapter 3: Twin 3

Well now, I’m like “hmm, what if I became an intern?” 

I didn’t even apply l o l.

But this gave me the opportunity to get to know the other freshmen better. We had freshmen pre-games at Markley and more specifically Taryn’s dorm, and boy were they unforgettable memories that we created. 

Look at this one! 

Anyway who knew this Cali Boy would be the reason for the revival of Tendra…

Chapter 4: Throwback Tendra

So how did I end up in this position when I’m not even Filipino??? 

For some context, I am from Skokie, IL, the LARGEST village in the US. (Don’t ask me what that means). Going into high school, we had a huge Filipino student body and most of my friends since elementary school are Filipino. My sister and I both had good friends that were Filipino. Originally, I wasn’t too involved in my Filipino Club, Kapit Bayan because I was more focused on my other dance club. Until it was my sophomore year and all my friends had competed in Battle of the Bamboo and won third place, I was dragged to join and unfortunately during my year we did not win… But I must say it was a thrilling experience! From actually slicing my friend’s scalp to rolling off the 5 foot stage. (You can ask me about it after ) We were also one of, if not the biggest student organization. Right after, COVID hit. Then at the beginning of Junior year, I was asked by the current coordinators if I would be interested in helping coordinate battle with them. I was hesitant at first but then accepted anyway. I spent hours researching and story boarding and it was extremely hard during covid. However when senior year came along unfortunately I dropped out of being a coordinator. Still, I was very familiar with Filipino culture and always felt a sense of community.

Chapter 5: As(h)endra Arc

Back to the question of how did I even end up in this position? I received a message from Ash asking if I would be interested in running as his co because of my experience with Battle. Of course I was hesitant because I wasn’t sure if this was my place to step up in a leadership position especially since many times when I tell people I am in FASA, they always ask why I’m in it because I am not even Filipino. Many times this did make me feel weird about being so involved, but FASA itself has never made me feel like an outsider. I ended up running because I felt that Ash’s ambition to bring FASA back into Battle as a competitor was something that I could help bring to life. 

With both of us living being from Chicago or whatever, when summer hit, we spent hours and hours either just hanging out or working on FASA stuff. I must say, many of those hours were spent grinding Valorant… so @ FASA Hater we are coming for you this Rice Bowl. Even being in Chicago, we made the road trip back for Kalayaan and then Blondra became a thing!

Then when we got back to school, we were already sucked into the PCN grind. I just want to say that I am so proud of everyone who joined a performance even if it was their first time. Everyone truly grew so much and I hope everyone was able to get what they wanted to out of it. Everyone looked amazing on stage! Starting as a general member being on the outside of the circle to being the one saying the chant and starting the hype circle was such an amazing experience.

Then of course, Battle. We went through many battles with this. 17 hours of FASA for 5 weeks. How is that even real?! There were many times where Ash and I were really discouraged and worried about how our vision was gonna turn out. Many times where we were troubleshooting our story board, worrying about cultural accuracy, if we had the funds (*shoutout Andrew!!), and having enough people perform. It felt like a constant struggle with there being so many uncertainties going on and many times where neither of us wanted to do anything but we still pulled through. But even then, I felt confident that we would win. 

Again I would like to sincerely thank everyone who performed and helped us bring our vision to life. Thank you for your patience, and trusting us to lead you into Battle even when we were doing this for the first time, too. I really hope that you guys are proud of your accomplishments as much as I am proud of you all. 

But more importantly.

To Ash:

Hi. I know that we’ve gone through many ups and downs, but I’m glad that I was able to experience this with you. I would have to say that there were many times that I felt like we weren’t doing enough and it really stressed me out.  I know that I focused a lot on appreciating the general members, but I want to say that I acknowledge all the hard work that you have put into performance. Looking back at our year, we let our ambition drive us and it was a really fulfilling and full circle moment especially bringing home our well deserved trophy. I am really proud of us for being able to create FASA Pamana and bringing FASA back to Battle as a competitor. I am really happy with our results and thank you for bearing with me. I also had a lot of fun practicing for FASApalooza and I think our creativity really brought FASA performance to another level. I don’t know if I would’ve been able to grow this much if it were anyone else.  So once again, thank you for everything. It has been a pleasure working with you. 

Chapter 6: Back to Tendra

So, Tendra.. Tendra really started when Eli’s mom was guessing Taryn’s name before Kalayaan. Then for some reason, Philip Churchley says “It starts with a K and ends with Tendra,”. Now, Tendra has been revived! But also, for those of you who don’t know… people would mix me up with Taryn. This makes her Twin 4. In conclusion, I found my own little happy family within FASA. Papa Eli and his quadruplets: Tendra, Karyn, Pip, and Fifi. 

But lastly, my message to board as Kendra:

Dear Board,

Thank you for supporting me and Ash through our vision. I’m glad that I was able to start the Taho train. I appreciate all of you for all the hard work and dedication that you’ve put into making FASA a wonderful and welcoming community for me. I will forever cherish our memories together and wish you all the best in your future endeavors. And if you ever encountered Tendra, no you didn’t.

Tendra signing off.

[kiyokoxd]

Come See The Stars (Dark Era)

Note - This story is from my Wattpad, you might not understand a few parts but if you want to, go check out my Wattpad - quaraplayz (this is a bonus chapter from there :))

Slight mention of Self Harm in the first para.

You were going to sleep, just as your dad told you. It was late, exactly 1 am right now. You were busy putting medicine and wrapping bandages around your wrist due to the hard training and your cuts. You wrapped yourself against the warm blanket, yet you couldn't sleep. You heard a loud bang coming from your window.

You sighed as you got up, what was that?

You quickly pulled your curtains aside as you saw Dazai, you flinched as you heard him loudly shouting.

"Hey Y/N!"

Slightly conscious, you signalled him to shut up as your index finger came to your mouth, making a "shhh" sound. He nodded happily, you put your 5 fingers up to show him that you needed 5 minutes.

He gave you a thumbs up. You closed your window and the curtains, a weird gut feeling coming in your stomach, what was he doing here at 1 in the morning? Shouldn't he sleep? Of course, Mori told you both to be friends but– You shook your head and sighed, "It's probably something important.."

You wore a jacket and sneaked out of your house, not wanting to ditch him. How did he know where you lived again–?

You came down the stairs in a hurry as he waved at you.

"Wh-What is it you dumbass?" You shivered at the sudden wind rushing by.

"Do you wanna come to see the stars with me?" He asked softly, his voice contained excitement but he didn't want to let that out.

"Huh..? At this time?", your cheeks having a soft evident blush.

"Mhm!" He nodded aggressively.

"Okay..?"

[ you can play the song ]

He dragged you along as you just followed him, not having a single idea about how his mind worked. He would act serious, intimidating, charming and smart, but only to act dumb, adorable, childish and cheerful. It was like he almost had a twin, both having different personalities. Somehow, it made you want to learn more about him.

He got you on top of a small cliff where there were no sounds, just comfortable silence surrounding you both. It was peaceful, something you barely ever felt or saw.

You took a deep breath in, you let it out only to flinch at the sudden warmth you felt behind. He was hugging you.

"D-Dazai?" You asked, still not used to these random acts of affection or kindness. This reminded you of someone and you weren't sure if you liked it or not.

"Sorry- You okay with it? I was just trying to scare you~"

"Well that successfully failed"

"Yep.." He yawned softly which caused you to have a slight grin on your face. A sudden light feeling in your chest.

"Dazai..."

"Hm?" He leaned into you more, you could feel his breath against your ears.

"Step away for a second.."

"Oh sure-"

He stepped back as you looked confused, you weren't sure what you were feeling.

"I feel light?"

He gave you a weird look while you shook your head, you can't open up to people you barely know, what if they tell your dad?

"Nothing."

He nodded understandably, smiling at you to show slight comfort in that you could trust him, the light flutter of your heart leads you to try and copy his smile.

You both sooner or later decided to lie down, you both looked at the stars. They were beautiful, small yet bright. It reminded me of the people laughing, the kids playing and shouting, you weren't sure why did they do that, was there a certain reason? It was impossible for you to remember how it felt to feel what others felt.

You somehow felt relatable to Dazai, he seemed happy, yet, it never seemed real. You were good at reading people and you weren't sure why he acted the way he acted.

"Dazai, are you sad?" You asked straight-forwardly, not thinking there would be any harm.

He flinched at this sudden random question, "I.. Well, I don't know."

It was somewhat the truth. He wasn't sure how he felt, no matter how heavy and empty he felt, no matter how pressured or pain he was in, he could never cry. Crying meant sadness, right?

"You know if Mori didn't call me, I would be most probably dead by now," You said jokingly even though your stoic voice didn't help and made it less comforting.

He looked at you as if he saw himself in you, "Well, how so?"

"I was trying to kill myself?" You recalled and he nodded his head.

"Ah well.. Same"

A small moment of silence as Dazai spoke up again, "Do you know what are constellations?"

"What?"

"Basically a group of stars that appears to form a pattern or picture"

"I see.." You weren't sure what to say to that, it seemed pretty cool.

"You know, like shapes in the cloud? Have you ever tried forming them?" He asked, trying to continue the conversation.

"I used to, I barely get time to focus on myself now" Your lips parted as you looked above again, you tried making a picture or any shape that came up in your mind. He gave you a curious look while looking above again.

"A heart!" You both exclaimed together, meaning that you both saw the same thing, you looked at each other as he starts laughing and your lips curve into a small smile.

"Well that was a weird coincidence"

"Yeah" You speak, you never had this much fun in years. It didn't seem much but it was for you.

"It's called a Capricornus"

You look at him, "You like stars?"

He looks at you back which causes your eyes to meet, somehow they were full of life. It was almost like two empty beings making each other whole.

"I like looking at them, they give me.. Inner peace I guess?" He blurts out. You nod your head as in to tell him you were listening while he smiles.

"It's 2am dumbo" You inform him. Time sure passes quickly.

"You feeling sleepy?" He asks.

"No, but my dad's gonna kill me," You tell him.

While you try to return and talking about other things you can talk, anything not Port Mafia related.

This was something you both needed.

"Ah well.. Bye! Good night!" He says energetically. You nod and hug him which surprises him, yet he takes this as an opportunity to tease you, "Aw does someone care about me~?"

"No, but I like you."

"...."

"I uh, never had a friend in years so.."

"Oh! I am glad then" He smiles.

"We're friends right?"

"Of course," He brings his hand in order to shake which you obliged, the warmth of his made you want to hold on to it later like it was the only thing that might give you comfort.

"Goodnight.." You leave him as he goes away, running to your room. You get inside your bed, oh your performance would be bad tomorrow, but this was worth it. You smile and blush remembering his face, it was like he was the sun while you were the moon. But, the sun gets tired too, the moon helps. That was your relationship.

You didn't panic or anything, but soon slept.

You found another importance in life, it was the stars. Reminding you of someone special and making you feel like you weren't alone. You felt peace in the violence, the stars moving, many people looking at it like they were the only ones, yet it connected so many people. The moon symbolising all their emotions together. You could look at it and you will see your loved ones waving from above, Asami especially.

Maybe Dazai and you could look at each other once in a while?

[omgrachwrites]

The Princess and The Duke - Chapter Six

Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader

Summary: As the   Princess of  Spain, you were always supposed to marry King James of   England to make  an alliance between Spain and England. When he marries a  woman at his  court for love, you are married off to his best friend, Sirius Black the  Duke of Bedford to keep the alliance. However, the   court is riddled  with secrets and a rebel in the North starts to rise   against the Throne.  Royal AU.

Warnings: fluff, fluff and more fluff! Mentions of sex, little bit of angst

Words: 2458

Disclaimer: This gif does not belong to me and I’m so sorry if this Spanish is wrong!

Translation: espero vivir para ver tu hermoso rostro una vez mas - I hope to live to see your beautiful face once more.

A/N: I hope you guys enjoy this part, please let me know what you think and let me know if you would like to be tagged! I love you all! xxx

Chapter Six - Onwards to England

The first day of summer heralded with a clear blue sky and an almost sweltering heat, it arrived a couple of days before Sirius and his wife had to leave for England. Sirius wanted to make the most of the hot summer’s day before it was too late. The weather in England was temperamental, though it was now summer, the weather in England couldn’t always be guaranteed. That was why he was taking some time away from his work to spend time with Y/N.

Sirius grinned as he put the finishing touches together before he left the garden in search of Y/N. He found her in the grand ballroom speaking with some of the staff about the ball they were throwing on the night before they left for England. When Y/N spotted him she bid goodbye to the servants and wandered up to him with a bright smile on her face.

“Good afternoon,” she cupped his neck and greeted him with a sweet kiss, “I haven’t seen you much today, what have you been doing?”

“Well,” Sirius started, pulling his beautiful wife close, “if you come with me, I’ll show you,” he grinned as he tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.

Y/N laughed as she raised an eyebrow, “I’ll go with you, only if it won’t sacrifice my honour,” she teased as she took his arm and they walked from the ballroom.

Sirius smirked as he held in a snorting laugh, “oh Princess, your honour was sacrificed on our wedding night, over and over again.”

“Sirius,” Y/N gasped and giggled as she slapped his arm lightly, a flush forming on her cheeks. Sirius chuckled and kissed her perfumed cheek.

Sirius led her over the beautiful sun kissed grounds, through the water gardens and through the small thicket of trees that were on the edge of his estate. Y/N gave him a quizzical look as he got an old rusty key out of his pocket, lifted the curtain of ivy and unlocked the heavy door.

Y/N gasped as she ventured inside and gazed at the garden and the flowers that were growing all around her, “I didn’t even know that this was here, it’s so beautiful.”

Sirius smiled and wrapped his arms around her from behind, resting his head on her shoulder, “I didn’t find it until a couple of years ago, I found the key in one of the cabinets in the chateau. I tend to it but I’ve never brought anyone else here,” he chuckled, suddenly feeling nervous.

Y/N let out a little laugh as she turned to face him and he saw the tears that were sparkling in her eyes, “I love it Sirius, thank you for bringing me here,” Sirius smiled as he pressed a lingering kiss to her lips.

“Come on,” he led her down the stone steps and through the flowers that grew around their feet to the spot beneath the tree where he’d set up the picnic, “I wanted us to make the most of the remaining time we have left here. I made sure to get all of your favourite things together.

Y/N smiled, “you are simply the best husband in the world,” she giggled as she popped one of the ripe strawberries into her mouth as Sirius uncorked the wine.

There weren’t many things that were sweeter than ripe strawberries and summer wine but Y/N’s lips were definitely one of them. Their stomachs were full and they had resorted to kissing in the shade of the tree. When Sirius’ hand dipped beneath Y/N’s skirts she giggled against his lips and placed a hand on his chest, pushing him away gently.

“Where did you find all the time to do this? What about your work for the King?”

Sirius sighed, biting his lip, he wasn’t sure how Y/N would take the news, “I’ve got it all sorted, Regulus is going to Cumbria as a spy. He offered.”

“What?” Y/N sighed, sitting up, “why didn’t you tell me? I’ve sent some of Spain’s best men to investigate the threat,” she narrowed her eyes.

“Look Y/N, if it is rebels then Regulus will be in a much better position to deal with them. Our family were awful; they would have done anything to overthrow the Potters. James and I were tutored together as children and we became best friends. I hated my parents and their ideals. James’ parents took me in as their second son. If it is rebels in Cumbria then they’ll think that Regulus is one of them. He’ll be taking passage to England with us before he rides to Cumbria.”

Y/N sighed as she fiddled with her fingers, “it seems like you’ve got it all figured out, I just wish that you had both spoken to me about it,” she looked so hurt, “we were supposed to be in this together.”

Sirius nodded as he cupped her cheeks, pressing a kiss to her mouth, “we are in this together, I’m sorry Y/N.”

Y/N smiled as she combed her fingers through his hair, “I forgive you, it’s hard not to with that pretty face,” she giggled, tracing his lips with her thumb, “I want another try at making a baby, we may have made one already but if we haven’t then I want another try.”

In that moment where she was lying against the tree she had never looked more beautiful and he had never wanted her more. He was glad that his new wife liked to be intimate with him, “as my Princess wishes,” he hesitated, looking down at her. He wanted to tell her, he needed to tell her, even if she didn’t feel the same, “I love you Y/N.”

Y/N smiled as she gazed up at him, tears sparkling in her eyes again, “I love you too Sirius, truly,” she beamed, leaning up to kiss him.

After their picnic – and their love making – they came across Remus in the corridor and he was looking unusually grim. Before Sirius could ask him about it, he had blurted it all out, “Do you remember that Lord who wanted me to meet his daughter, Mary? Well, I’ve invited him to the ball,” he took a deep breath, “you’re right; sometimes we have to do our duty to the King. Sometimes we have to choose duty over love.”

Sirius was rendered silent. What was Remus doing? Why was he giving up everything?

“What about Sophia? Have you thought about her, My Lord?” Remus just gulped before shaking his head and striding down the corridor without another word.

Y/N heaved a huge sigh as she gave Sirius a worried look, biting her lip, “Sophia will be heartbroken.”

Sirius nodded as he clenched his jaw, “I know my love, I’ll try and talk to him.”

The ball quickly came around the following evening and Y/N looked beautifully ethereal in a dress of golden satin and a crown of bronze leaves in her hair. She looked stunning and it seemed that many of the guests thought so too. Many Lords and noblemen were vying for her attention and Sirius felt an itch of jealousy as he watched stranger’s eyes roam over his wife. Though as soon as Y/N kissed him passionately in the middle of the ballroom his jealousy melted away and all he could focus on was Y/N.

The ball was going splendidly so far, there had been no drunken brawls to speak of and it seemed that everyone was getting along fine; Sirius didn’t want a fight to break out in his home. However, Y/N had been right, Sophia seemed completely heartbroken; she ended up spending most of her time outside in the balmy summer air beneath the setting sun. When she came inside in short intervals to get another drink her eyes were red and bloodshot. It was painfully obvious that she’d been crying her eyes out and she ended up retiring from the party early. What was worse was the fact that Remus had refused to look her way all evening. The Lady Mary was charming and beautiful but it was clear that Remus’ heart just wasn’t in the right place.

Sirius smiled as he danced with his wife while she gazed up at the beautiful artwork of the angels that had been painted on the ceiling, “are you looking forward to going to England Y/N?”

Y/N tore her eyes away from the ceiling and smiled at him beautifully, “well, it will certainly be an adventure,” she grimaced, “onward to England I say.”

Sirius pulled her close, “I’ll be right by your side, I promise, I’m not going to leave you Y/N.”

Y/N beamed at him as she nudged her nose against his and she kissed him long and deep, “I love you Sirius.”

------------------------------

The voyage to England was just as rough and unpleasant as you remembered from when you travelled from Spain. You spent most of the trip with your head in a bucket as Sirius stroked your hair. When you weren’t ill you were reading stories such as the Arthurian legends and tales of pirates and mermaids that dwelled in unknown corners of the world.

Finally, after what felt like forever, the ship docked in Portsmouth and England welcomed you with a blue sky and just the hint of a sea breeze. You smiled as you watched the sun shine on the surface of the sea, making it shimmer like diamonds. It was a beautiful sight to see.

When Regulus parted ways with you to leave for Cumbria you hugged your brother in law, “good luck Regulus and be careful.”

He smiled as he kissed your hand, “espero vivir para ver tu hermoso rostro una vez mas.”

Sirius scoffed at his brother’s words and you fought back a giggle, you were especially glad that Sirius couldn’t understand Regulus; otherwise you doubted that Regulus would be leaving here alive. As you rode through the pretty English countryside you gazed over the rolling hills, spying little chapels and cottages that were nestled among the trees. Sirius told you tales of his childhood with James, how they stole the piping hot bread from the kitchens and they tried to smuggle a peacock out of the menagerie.

You giggled and looked over at Sophia, she was smiling but you could see the sadness in her eyes and you couldn’t blame her, it seemed like Remus would be getting married before the year was out, “it’ll be alright Sophia,” you promised.

“Thank you, Your Highness,” she sniffled, “I just wanted him to love me,” you wished that you could take away her pain but words could only do so much.

As you and Sirius were lead into the throne room there were many chatters and murmurs as you and Sirius approached the King and Queen. You ignored the many jealous filled looks that the ladies of the court awarded you. Queen Lily had a hand resting on her stomach and you hoped it was because she was pregnant.

“Duke and Duchess, welcome. Thank you for coming back to court, it’s an honour,” King James began.

You curtseyed while Sirius sank into a low bow, “the honour is all ours, Your Majesty,” Sirius smiled.

“The two of you must be exhausted after your long trip. Why don’t you get settled in your chambers and we’ll have a feast this evening to welcome you,” Queen Lily radiantly smiled at the two of you.

The chambers that you and Sirius were going to be staying in were very comfortable and spacious, there was a grand fireplace in the middle of the room but hopefully you wouldn’t be getting use out of it this summer. There was a portrait of two beautiful little boys hanging over the fireplace and you frowned as you looked at it, wondering who it was. It was then that you recognised those grey smiling eyes.

“Is this you and James?” you smiled at your husband as he flopped down on the huge bed.

“Yes, these were my chambers when I leaved at court, before I moved to my estate in France. I’ve missed these rooms very much.

You smiled as you wandered over to him and sat next to him on the bed, running your fingers through his long hair as he rested his head in your lap. You leaned down and kissed his forehead, “well, you were a very beautiful child,” you giggled as he flushed and kissed your hand, “I want a portrait like that of our children,” you admitted with a smile.

Sirius gasped and sat up, looking at you with wide eyes, “are you saying that you’re pregnant?” there was so much hope in his eyes and you hated to disappoint him but you didn’t know yet, you hoped that you were. Nothing would make you happier than being the mother of his children.

You shrugged as you cupped his cheek, almost wincing as you saw the disappointment in his eyes, “I can’t be sure, we haven’t been intimate long enough for me to tell. But, as soon as I know, you’ll be the first one I tell,” you promised him with a kiss.

Sirius nodded, pulling you into his arms, “and I’ll anxiously be awaiting the day.”

A few weeks later you and Sophia joined Queen Lily and Lady Mary – the woman that Remus seemed to be courting – for breakfast. It was a warm summer’s morning as you sat on the balcony, the day was so clear that you could see the hills that loomed and blanketed the villages. Sophia had been very quiet all morning, it seemed like she had been shocked into silence, because Queen Lily had announced that Lady Mary would be coming to court as one of her ladies. Mary was very charming and kind but you just couldn’t find it in your heart to like her, not when your best friend’s heart had been shattered.

Lily sighed as she popped a raspberry into her mouth, “do you think it makes me less of a woman, the fact that I can’t conceive a child?”

You sighed as you reached across the table and took her hand, “it will happen Your Majesty, I promise.”

Lily smiled at you prettily as she offered around a plate of strawberry tarts, “I know they’re your favourite Y/N.”

You smiled weakly as you took a tart off the plate and took a little bite; you almost grimaced as the sweet flavours filled your mouth. They usually were your favourite, the strawberries were impossibly sweet and the pastry was wonderfully flaky. However, you had lost your liking for them and you thought you knew why. It was something that you could not tell the Queen. Not yet.

------------------------------ 

@smiithys​ @elayneblack​ @amelie-black​ @siriuslyjanhvi​ @pregnant-piggy​ @lindatreb​ @mabelle-cherie​ @hxrgreeves​ @britishspidey​ @mads-bri​ @classicrocketqueen​ @sxtansqueen​ @hufflepuffzutara​ @missmulti​ @bruxa0007​ @ourstarsailor​ @fific7​ @galwithbluethoughts​ @2410slb​ @sunles​ @krismeunicornbaobei​

[mudhornchronicles]

dreamboat | greaser!frankie | part three

photo credit

pairing: frankie morales x f!reader; greaser!frankie x f!reader

warnings: violence, mentions of racism towards latinos, cursing

dreamboat: part one | part two | part three

masterlist

Frankie has been in this cold and dark cement cell for what feels like months – it has been 19 hours. It was only 3 in the afternoon and would be in this cell until 5 when his mother got off work. He may have been 18 years old, but the sheriff did not care – especially being Frankie. Frankie would not stop pacing to and from one side of the 6-foot by 8-foot jail cell and the sheriff was getting quite annoyed.

“Frankie, ya want a metal cup to rattle against the bars or will ya quit bein’ dramatic? Stop pacin’ or you’ll make a hole through the cement, kid.” Frankie stops pacing and looks at the sheriff sitting at the desk situated in front of the holding cell. “Ya actin’ like ya goin’ to federal prison. Tu madre viene por ti a las cinco, hijo. Relajate.”

Your mother is coming for you at 5, son. Relax.

Frankie sits on the floor, putting his head in his hands. He lets out a sigh as he rubs his face. He looks back up at the smiling sheriff and raises an eyebrow. “What’s so funny?”

The sheriff takes a drink of his coffee and nods his head over at Frankie. “You are kid. Ya only got in a fight; ya didn’t hold up a bank.” He reaches in his desk’s cabinet and pulls out a silver flask. He pours a generous amount of a golden liquid in his coffee and goes to close the flask. He tuts as he looks back at the steaming black liquid and pours some more whiskey. This causes Frankie to laugh at the sheriff he came to know and like. The sheriff stands and walks over to Frankie, his mug of coffee in one hand and dragging his chair with the other. He places the chair in front of Frankie’s cell and takes a seat. He takes a swig of his coffee and looks at Frankie.

“I hope ya know your mom is goin’ to have a cow when I tell her why you’re in here.”

Frankie smirks and nods. “Ya ain’t tell her, yet?”

“What? That ya gave Oberyn a beatin’ ‘cause he was givin’ ya shit? Hell, that little bastard deserved it. If I don’t tell ya mom, you will.”

“Yeah? Well he was cruisin’ for a bruisin’. He should’a seen it comin’. Next time I see that cat, he’s gettin’ more than a couple’a shiners,” Frankie huffed. All he was able to give Oberyn was a good black eye and a couple of other bruises. The sheriff got called the second the boys went outside. He knew Rosie must have called the sheriff, but Frankie couldn’t be mad. The boys promised Rosie that there would be no confrontations in front of the diner – they did not do that last night. “Why I gotta tell my mom for? Aint you the sheriff? Shouldn’t ya be the one to tell ‘er why I’m in the can?”

The sheriff takes a deep breath and sighs. “Frankie, listen to me.” Frankie scoffs and rolls his eyes, waiting for the sheriff’s spiel about being responsible for his mother’s sake.

The sheriff sits straight and places his mug on the floor. He clears his throat and speaks to Frankie in the tone Frankie knows to shut up and listen. “Francisco, you listen here you little shit. You been in this very cell three times now, Tom having the record of 38, and ya feel like what? Ya feel like ya cool or somethin’? Ya mom already don’t like the friends ya hang with, except for Santiago. Ya think she likes seein’ you behind these,” the sheriff bangs on the metal bars for emphasis, “bars here? Now, I ain’t ya daddy, son. Nobody will ever compare to the man ya father was, but I know good and damn well he wouldn’t wanna see his only kid behind these bars. That man fought too fuckin’ hard for you and ya momma for you to be fuckin’ up ya life.”

Frankie stands up and leans against the cell, holding a metal bar in each hand. “’The fuck ya on about? You said it ya’self! I just got in’a fight. How’s that fuckin’ up my life?”

The sheriff stands up and gets close to Frankie. “Watch ya tone with me, boy. I ain’t one of your little friends to be gettin’ an attitude with, got it? You know that little betty you had ‘round ya arm? Her momma don’t like ya. Her momma got her head way up her ass, she don’t like anyone whose shoes aren’t new every day.”

Frankie chuckles at this.

“Hell she don’t even like me very much and I’m the law. Ya think she wants her daughter ridin’ round town with ya? Ya like her right? The more you get behind these bars, the further you get from her, you got it?”

Frankie nods as he walks away from the sheriff and sits on the concrete bench with a slump. The sheriff lets out a sigh and drags his chair back to the desk, taking a big gulp of his coffee. He grabs his newspaper and flicks it to straighten it out. He looks at Frankie and frowns. He decides to give Frankie one last piece of advice – something he promised himself he’d never use but he knew the young man needed to hear it.

“Francisco,” he says to catch Frankie’s attention. He continues even if Frankie doesn’t look at him, he knows he’s listening. “Tu padre murió por ti. El murió para que tu vivieras la vida que deseabas. Yo sé que este estilo de vida no es para ti y si lo eliges, entonces tu padre murió por nada.”

Frankie’s head snaps up and watches as the sheriff stands and walks out for a smoke. Frankie knew the sheriff wanted to leave the room for air because he would always smoke inside. From this moment to a quarter after 5, Frankie remained silent and still as he pondered on what the sheriff had said to him.

Your father died for you. He died so you could live the life you wanted. I know this lifestyle is not for you and if you choose it, then your father died for nothing.

As much as he wanted to cry and fight the sheriff, Frankie knew that the sheriff spoke only truth. Frankie’s father would have been incredibly disappointed, which only hurts Frankie the more he thought of it. The sheriff said that his father died for him and it’s true. If his father would have put Frankie’s name on that sign up, Frankie would have been dead by now. Instead of drafting 18-year old’s as stated, the US became desperate and sent off 16-year old’s with the promise of compensation for their families – that didn’t ever happen.

Frankie heard rapid heels clicking coming from the corridor and he knew it was his mother.

“Francisco Morales! ¿En qué pendejada te metiste ahora? Fue por ese Thomas, verdad? Ni se te ocurra mentirme.”

Francisco Morales! What bullshit did you get into this time? It was because of that Thomas, right? Do not even think about lying to me.

“Hi Mom.” Frankie sadly says. His mother holds up one finger at Frankie and turns to the sheriff. She offers him a tired smile and a quick hug.

“Ahora que hizo, Javier? Por favor dime que me lo puedo llevar a casa.”

What did he do now, Javier? Please tell me I can take him home.

Frankie hears his mother say. She sounds as if she’s about to burst into tears, her voice pleading and shaky. Frankie immediately feels a wave of guilt wash over him. He saw his mother break apart when they lost his father and was thrown as being the sole breadwinner – he couldn’t put her through pain again.

“Yes, Monica, you can take him. He just had a run in with that Oberyn kid again.” Frankie’s mother lets her head fall back as she groans. She looks back at Frankie and shakes her head.

“How many times do I have to tell you to ignore that boy, Frankie? He isn’t worth getting into it with. Did Tom throw you into it? He can never fight his own battles and he threw Santiago in last time. Pope’s lucky Javier called me and not his mom - poor woman would have a heart attack.”

Frankie shakes his head. “No mom. I got myself in it.” Frankie looks at Javier, the sheriff, and Javier gives him an assuring nod. “The boys and I took the new girl in town out to Rosie’s and Oberyn decided to ruin the night as usual. He just got out the can so he was lookin’ for a fight I guess.”

His mother and Javier stride over to Frankie. Javier unlocks the cell, allowing Frankie to come out and hug his mother. His mother gives him a kiss on the cheek and holds his face in her hands.

“Francisco, I know you thought you were doing the right thing. Did Oberyn lay a hand on the girl?”

“If I hadn’t punched him, he probably would’ve.”

Monica, his mother, gives her son a warm smile. “If you got in here for defending someone because you thought it was the right thing to do, then okay. I suppose what done is done, but I never want to see you behind bars ever again. Tal vez tengas 18 años, pero todavia te doy una paliza, cabrón.” she jokes - well half-jokes.

You may be 18 years old, but I’ll still beat your ass, dumbass.

As Frankie and his mother collect his things and sign the necessary paperwork, Javier calls for Frankie’s attention. He simply tells him “remember our little talk, Frankie. I ain’t try’na see you behind those bars again.”

A little talk Frankie will always remember and think about every day.

Frankie knew he should be going to his fifth and sixth periods, but he had already missed the first four, so why they hell not miss. He wanted to because he wanted to see you after the fiasco, but he was nervous. You saw him fight, get arrested, and get dragged away by Javier. He saw your eyes widen and fill with fear when he spat out blood and get put into handcuffs.

“So ‘Fish… where’s that little dolly of yours? You two get it on yet?” Redfly says. “Oh wait… ya been in the can!” The Bandits all laugh and Santiago slaps his knee while Will wheezes at the thought of Frankie in jail. Frankie takes a drag of his cigarette, staring at his friends and offering an eye roll.

“Alright laugh it up. I made it out, didn’t I?”

“yeah,” Santiago starts, “that’s only cause Javi likes us. If it were Oberyn in there, Javi would’a still had his ass locked up.” Pope gives his best friend a slap on the shoulder paired with a laugh and a quick just kiddin’ buddy.

The bell rings and the sea of people wave into the hallways. The boys bid farewell to each other, Will and Frankie walking to their class together. Will was the first to spot you in the crowd of people. He saw you walk with a student you had all your classes with; Maxwell Lorenzano, or Max Lord as he liked to be called now. The Bandits knew him, they knew him very well.

Max was a soc kid who would hang out with the other popular socs, but in actuality, Max was another Latino kid whose family were more like the Bandits. Both of his parents were greasers, and they knew what it was like to work hard yet not have a lot. His father worked all the time as a mechanic and his mother was a stay-at-home mom. His dad was always working on a motorcycle that would become his son’s first ride, but then something in Max changed. His whole life, Max wore a leather jacket and slicked back hair, not caring what the world thought of him, but as the times went on, the bullying got worse.

Just like Frankie, Max’s family was not always welcomed, but his aunt’s family was. His aunt was a greaser too, but her husband was a complete socialite. His family created and owned an oil business which allowed them to want for nothing. When Max saw the acceptance his aunt had received from her in-laws, it was a flipped switch. He asked to work with his uncle to learn all about the business. His uncle was elated to find out his nephew wanted to leave the “delinquent” life and become a businessman. Max’s face was plastered on the company’s ads and the popular kids wanted to be friends with him. He was accepted as a soc and even though his parents were upset, Max wasn’t entirely honest at school.

Max still worked on his dad’s motorcycle project. He still had his leather jackets and wore them at private family gatherings. He still knew the slang and attitude. He was still loyal to the people who liked him for him.

Max and The Bandits looked after each other as brothers. Even though he was not officially a member, Max had his BANDITS leather jacket at home, hung and clean. In order to keep his soc image at school, Max and the boys pretended to hate each other. Max pretended to be disgusted with their way of life and would throw insults here and there when the other kids would.

When Max saw Will and Frankie coming their way, Will gave him a discreet nod and Max reciprocated.

“Look what the cat dragged in… a couple of worthless hoodlums.” Max said. He turns to you and says, “C’mon, you shouldn’t associate yourself with these… things.” You look up and meet Frankie’s beautiful eyes. He seemed as if he wanted to jump out and say something to you but couldn’t.

“Don’t get yourself twisted up, Lord. Your little petty pants will wrinkle,” Will snickers.

Max rolls his eyes at him. “Move out of our way, Miller. We’ll be late.”

Will laughs and moves out of the way and gestures for him to walk. “C’mon, Polo. Keep it movin’.”

As you walk past the boys, Will offers a quick hey and you answer with a smile. You walk away, but Frankie calls you by name, causing you to stop and take a breath. You ask Max to give you a minute, him checking his watch and agreeing. You walk up Frankie and look at him, silently asking him to continue.

“I… I- Hi. How are you?” Frankie sputters out. He mentally slaps his forehead and cursing at himself. Is that the best he can do?

“I’m doing fine, thanks.” you quietly say.

Frankie tries to put together a mix of words, but none of it is coherent. Will lets out a loud and obnoxious sigh and puts his arm around Frankie’s shoulders.

“Catfish here wanna know if you wanna hang with’im after school. How ‘bout it sweetheart? The guy just got out the can and in need of company.” You raise an eyebrow at Will.

In need of company?

Max lets out a sarcastic laugh and walks to you, grabbing your arm and pulling you away.

“Her mother would have her head if she were caught with you guys again. You already got her in trouble once; no need for it to happen again.”

You look back at Frankie, silently apologizing, but in the end, Max was right.

When you got home that night, Will assured you that nobody would talk about it. The next day, your mother came back furious and you were ultimately grounded for being seen with those boys. Your father was not too happy either, but was mainly concerned about your safety, which was a valid concern. Your mother demanded for you to never talk to Frankie or she would have to take action.

What action? You were not too sure.

No matter how hard Frankie tried to talk to you, Max would either pull you away saying he needed your help, or your teacher would ask him to quiet down. Frankie was not one to give up, but he also did not want to be a pain in your side. He felt as if the odds were against him, but he was going to get you to talk to him one way or another – at least a single hello in the hallway so he does not feel as if he messed up entirely.

It was now Wednesday, and The Bandits sat at one of the outside tables by the cafeteria. They “joked” with people, rough housed as usual, having a good day so far, but when the soc table kept staring, the boys didn’t feel so cheery.

“Fuck ya lookin’ at, soc? You got a starin’ problem?” Tom yells.

“You should get daddy’s money to check that out,” Benny continues. Frankie turns in his seat and looks at the group of the popular rich kids sitting at the opposite table from them. He lets out a sigh, letting it pour out of his nose, as he sees you sitting next to Max at that same table. When he gets a chance to really see you, he sees red.

Michael, the school’s top athlete, has his arm around you and you appear to be uncomfortable – something Frankie never wanted to do. You look around awkwardly as Michael stands up and confidently walks over to the boys, other soc boys in tow.

“Look here boys. A bunch of nothings thinking they’re something,” Michael says. The soc boys all laugh and Tom remains tall, chest puffed out.

“Ya better watch what ya sayin, Mikey. Wouldn’t want ya to get hurt.” Tom rebuttles.

Two of the boys behind Michael walk up to the Miller brothers, a bit shorter than the two but still reeking of false confidence.

“You three must be tired of carrying these two brown boys, huh? Always quiet and only get involved when they’re forced.”

Max walks over to Michael, you trailing behind him, and tells Michael to stop and to come back to the table. Michael refuses, asking Max if he is worried about him hurting his own kind. You gasp and get in front of Max, facing Michael.

“How dare you? You dare call Max a friend and still, you berate him and these boys,” you start, motioning to the Bandits, “because they aren’t “your kind?” I’ll have you know that these boys are some of the most intelligent people I have ever met, a lot smarter than you.”

“Is that so, sweetheart? You think these delinquents are worth getting in trouble?” To this, you give him a confused look. “You think your mom hasn’t gone around rambling about how her daughter was seen with the worst kids in town? These guys bring their parents shame. Well… except Francisco over there… he got his old man killed.”

Michael barely got his final word out before he was on the floor holding his bleeding jaw Santiago caused. Santiago grabbed his hand in pain; it was a while since he punched someone so suddenly like that. No matter the pain, he wasn’t about to let the spoilt rich kid get away with insulting his best friend and his best friend’s father.

You look over to Frankie, who is still sitting at the bench stone faced. How could he just sit there after Michael insulted him and his father? You go to walk to him but Max pulls you, walking away telling you that you’ll talk to him later.

“I’m taking you home after school, okay? Michael called a meeting after school and I told him I’ll be there when I get you home,” Max explained. He talked fast and seemingly out of breath. He knew something was going to go down – no one drops Michael like that without consequences.

“Why are you worried? Max, is something going to happen?” You ask. He looks around and explains to you what has happened when Michael wants revenge. From legal actions to physically hurting someone, Michael will stop at nothing to make himself look strong and important. Max just told you to be careful and to stay inside.

And something must have happened because Max came knocking down your door and asking your mother if it was okay if he took you around town. Your mother oddly was happy to agree and Max piled you in the car. He drove fast and parked inside a green home’s garage. For a second, you were terrified that Max was forced to bring you to Michael, but soon let out a breath of relief when you saw Will come into the garage and greet you.

“Alright, Maxie,” Will said. “What is so important and secretive that you called us all here and brought her along?” Frankie adjusted his hat, a baseball cap that suited him quiet well, and played with his hands.

“We have to hide Frankie’s car. Now.” Max stated rapidly.

Frankie’s head shot up and the boys all together threw questions as to why we had to temporarily get rid of Frankie’s car.

“Max. What are we hiding my dad’s car for?” Frankie asks. His voice is quiet and laced with worriedness.

Max takes a deep breath and apologetically looks straight into Frankie’s eyes.

“Michael’s planning on crushing your car.”

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[indiavolowetrust]

THE OBEY ME BOYS AS YANDERES: GAKUEN EDITION

**thank u @sl33pymimikyu and @thelazystrawberryboi for the ideas! es para todos ustedes

You are accepted into a particularly exclusive, prestigious school. As you are of low class, it is an acceptance based purely on merit. A fact that some of your wealthier classmates use to bully you. Due to your lonely upbringing – your parents and close relatives died when you were young – you find yourself determined to make friends, pass with honors, and prove yourself.

Unfortunately, you just so happen to draw the wrong kind of attention.

Word Count: 3,369

TW: Blood, Violence, Mention of Sexual Harassment, Yandere

PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO / TRIGGERED BY THESE TOPICS. I HAVE TAGGED AND INCLUDED TRIGGER WARNINGS.

BELPHEGOR

You can’t remember the last time you’ve managed to stay awake for more than a few hours at a time. Time passes by in a sleep-addled haze, given your penchant for afternoon naps and sleeping in, and each day is a struggle to focus on your classes. Belphie tells you that you should see a professional for your narcolepsy, that he can pay for the best medical treatment, but you won’t hear it. You’re not even sure if it is narcolepsy, considering its strange, sudden onset. You’ve tried time and time again to cure your condition. Pills, alarms, strict sleeping schedules – you’ve tried them all, to no avail.

Thankfully, you have Belphie at your side. At his behest, you’ve taken residence in one of his guest bedrooms for the time being. A precautionary measure to watch your condition. Without his generosity, you’re not sure if you’d have the ability to keep your scholarship.

You struggle to read the textbook in front of you. The words go in and out of focus, making you dizzy, and you grip the edge of the desk to stop yourself from falling over. It only works for so long. One wrong movement, and you feel your body tumble out of the chair and towards the ground.

Much to your surprise, Belphie catches you before you can crash into the floor. You hadn’t even heard him come in.

“You shouldn’t be so careless,” Belphie chides, firmly placing you back in your seat. You mumble a quiet thank you, trying to hold him in your wavering vision, but he merely waves off your gesture of gratitude. “Coffee’s by your book. If you want more, just tell me.”

The coffee mug is warm in your hands. Freshly brewed, homemade, and steaming, with the coffee beans roasted to a deep flavor. Belphie insists on making cups of coffee for you day and night, which you greatly appreciate. Honestly, you’re not sure if you would even be able to stay awake without the extra caffeine.

LUCIFER

You’re sure that this is a direct violation of school policy. One involving sexual harassment, specifically. Lucifer, your biology professor, is close enough that you can feel his breath tickling the nape of your neck. His skin radiates warmth, even through the fabric of his dress shirt, and the darkness of the classroom shrouds his expression from you. The result of a random and unexpected blackout during your tutoring session. While the contact isn’t exactly unwelcome – Lucifer is very, very attractive, after all – you’re not certain that you’re comfortable with the current situation. Especially when he hasn’t made any indication of –

“There’s something dirty on your uniform,” your professor says, pulling the aforementioned object off your shoulder. You blink. “I see that blackouts are a bit too nerve-wracking for you.”

Oh.

He sighs. “I thought you heard me tell you that.”

You didn’t, but he could have just repeated himself. It’s not like you don’t have the ability to straighten your uniform. The blackout does have you a little on edge, besides – it would have been better if you had done it yourself.

The conversation for the rest of your tutoring session plays out nearly as you had expected. There is pride in having a perfectly clean, composed school uniform, he states, and it is imperative that all students learn the importance of appearance in the workplace. All impurities must be cleansed. Removed totally from one’s person and the surroundings. That is a major part of the school’s creed, after all. It would do no good not to follow it.

You wish you had listened that day. You wish that you had noticed the hunger in his gaze at the time.

Yet you would only realize the importance in his words months later. Your hands handcuffed to a pipe, the light flickering above in the sterile laboratory, and that hungry gaze branded on Lucifer’s features. The classmate that had dared to kiss and touch you without your permission had been strapped to the table.

You hadn’t bothered to listen to him the first time. If this lecture in biology isn’t enough, Lucifer says, then he’s not sure how else he can explain it to you.

MAMMON

He did give you a chance, he explains. Countless chances. If you had just agreed to be his the first time, you wouldn’t have forced his hand. If you had just allowed him to be greedy with your time, he wouldn’t have had to pay off his hitmen. If you had just given him everything of yourself – your time, your touch, your smile – then he wouldn’t have felt compelled to do what he did. So it is your fault that all your friends are dead, really. It is your fault that you have no one else but him now, if you can even consider it that.

Which you don’t, of course. You had glared at him from the golden bars of your cage as he had gone on and on in his spiel, adjusting your position in your shackles, and then you had spat on him when he dared to come close. While he had effectively monopolized your time, he would never have your heart. He would never truly have all of you, no matter how much he tried. No amount of money could buy it. You had called him a monster, a demon, a complete fucking bastard – anything and everything that you could think of. You had told him that nothing he could do would ever win you over. Your demands on being freed from your prison had fallen on deaf ears.

Even now, with a knife to your throat and his body pressed too close to yours, you don’t regret that decision.

“If I finally stop fucking around and take ya for myself, would ya hate me?” Mammon draws out, testing the blade against the delicate skin of your neck. You force yourself to stay still as blood begins to trail down the edge. “’Course ya would. But I’m nicer than that, so I think I’ll go ahead and explain again. Just for good measure.”

You gasp as you are driven higher up the golden bars of the cage, the cold metal digging uncomfortably into your back. Still, you fail to relent. Your glare is just as intense as ever, focused on Mammon, and Mammon responds in kind. The cocky smile that makes itself known on his features does nothing but irritate you, as is the sickening knowledge that you have little control over the situation. Your escape attempts have only angered Mammon further.

“I’d carve yer tongue out first, ya know,” he reassures you. “I’d carve yer heart out and take it for myself before ya gave it to anyone else. If ya think you can pull a fast one on me – well, ya got another thing comin’.”

LEVIATHAN

Each drop that falls from the shower head is a needle against your back. Piercing, biting, and numbing in the most unpleasant manner possible. Worst of all, it is a sensation that has forced you into a violent awakening, as if your mind had been clouded by some unknown entity. Denial, contradiction, some sort of psychological defense mechanism – regardless of whatever the name is, it is one that has been ripped away from your consciousness. And so you find yourself curling into fetal position on the floor of Levi’s shower, attempting to drive away the thoughts that threaten your already fragile psyche. Needle-like drops bury themselves into your skin, the tiled floor of the Levi’s exorbitant bathroom has rendered your fingers numb, and your wet hair plasters itself against the nape of your neck.

You should have known. Perhaps there was some part of you that was aware of Levi’s atrocities, quietly connecting the murders and disappearances to his obsessive adoration for you. Perhaps some part of you had known all along, and you had chosen to ignore it.

“Do you need help in there?” Levi’s voice calls beyond the door. You flinch. “You didn’t fall or anything, did you?”

Your mouth is dry when you open it to speak. The words are silent.

The cases were too clean to be anything but planned. You’re painfully aware of that now. The fact that they were all romantic rivals of some sort hadn’t been a coincidence. They hadn’t drowned on their own, either. Something had pulled them under, deep into the black waters and underwater caves, and they had little choice but to do so. Nitrogen narcosis and hypoxia could only occur so many times. Someone with a knowledge of the underwater cave systems near your school had known of its dangers and lured the victims there.

Who was more suited to do that than the captain of the swim team? It is an answer that is almost too obvious – as well as one that he had skillfully manipulated to hide himself in plain sight.

A knock at the door. It swings open. You can’t bring yourself to move.

Levi tuts as he gathers you up in a towel, doing his best to pat you dry. “I knew I shouldn’t have left you alone,” he says, sighing. “Still, if you were too tired to shower without falling over, you should’ve told me. We’re friends, right? You can ask me to do anything.”

You hadn’t asked him to drown every one of his romantic rivals, but you keep that to yourself. Instead, you mumble something that you hope sounds like agreement.

Even as Levi works to dress you in your catatonic state, you think of the last expression you had seen on your date’s face. A mixture of surprise and bewilderment. You had noticed the familiar glove of the hand that had pulled him under, and the revelation had shocked you into complete and utter stillness for a few moments. Then you were desperately swimming upwards, your panic forcing you to use too much of your oxygen. You’re not sure if Levi dragged your date into a false chimney. You’re not even sure how Levi got you out of the water and to his family’s manor.

Regardless, you’ve been unconscious for nearly a day, your date’s body hasn’t resurfaced, and you’re now trapped in the same room as a murderer.

SATAN

While you haven’t sustained a concussion, you’ve awoken with more injuries than you would like. Which is just as well, considering what you’ve been through. One of your many harassers had saw it fit to throw you from a  story balcony – payment for your uppity nature, he had said – and you had been powerless to fend him and his friends off. Your books had gone off the railing first, your papers fluttering to the ground. Next was your bag itself, your pens and pencils, and the calculator you had saved up to buy. You had flinched at the sounds of your belongings cracking and scattering against the concrete below.

And then it was your turn.

You remember screaming. Begging for your life. Despite your pleas – you wouldn’t score as high next time, you hadn’t cheated, this could very well kill you – they had decided to toss you off the balcony.

The crack of your own bones was sickening. You had fractured your femur, broken one of your arms, and earned more than a few lacerations and bruises from the impact – but you had lived. Satan had managed to find you mere seconds after you had fallen, he had explained. A fortunate coincidence. As the heir of a healthcare corporation, it had been no trouble to call an ambulance and have you treated for your injuries. He and his family could waive the fees for your treatment, of course. It was the least he could do as a friend.

Yet you have a nagging feeling that something is wrong. Something off about his story. You were dragged out of your dorm at night and taken to a secluded part of campus that night, you remember. How had he known you would be there? How had he found you in such a short amount of time? And the perpetrators had mentioned something about being paid off, too. If you didn’t know any better, then you would think that –

The door to your hospital room slides open.

“How are you feeling?” Satan asks, a worried expression on his face. He crosses the room with quick, long strides and places a tray of food by your bed. Curried vegetables, white rice, and a hot cup of tea. “I know it’s not the best, but I hope it’s to your liking. I had you put in a more private wing, too – I figured you’d want some space.”

He shouldn’t feel obligated to apologize for hospital food of all things, you tell him. A pang of guilt strikes you. How could you think so badly of one of your only friends? You’re grateful that he was there.

Satan smiles. “Well, that’s good to hear,” he says. “My family owns this hospital, so feel free to stay here for as long as you like. I’ll inform the school later.”

You offer him a grateful smile, thanking him. He responds in kind.

Why would Satan pay someone to throw you off a balcony? The idea itself is completely ridiculous. Maybe you should get yourself checked for a concussion. Satan – your bookish, glasses-wearing, and studious friend – is about as dangerous as a newborn kitten.

ASMODEUS

It was, admittedly, a slow process. Anyone that had ever dared to harass and bully you had disappeared for a variety of reasons. Inexplicable ailments that sent them to the hospital. Drug overdoses that turned out to be fatal. Air embolisms for a variety of reasons, despite the youth and health of the victim. Calling cards that sent them to schools overseas. Freak accidents regarding pharmaceuticals. Mix-ups in medication.

Yet you ignored the strange occurrences. You sorely regret that decision.

Asmodeus twirls a ring of keys on one of his fingers, offering you that familiar, teasing wink. Given that you’ve been locked in this lavish room for days, however, it has an entirely new meaning now. He steps towards you with deliberation, his heeled boots clicking lightly against the marble floor, and you swallow audibly. He’s trying to intimidate you. He’s only trying to scare you. Asmodeus hasn’t raised a finger to you once since your capture, so you can at least have faith in that. Other than the drugged tea he had given you – a measure to render you unconscious and drag you in here – he hasn’t done anything else untoward.

“You’re really cute, you know,” he teases. “All that planning and scheming and plotting. Did you really think I wouldn’t notice? I thought you knew me better than that.”

You won’t say anything to anyone, you tell him. If he lets you out of here, you won’t tell anyone what he did. It would be disastrous if his family were to find out that he was using their pharmaceutical company for such purposes, wouldn’t it? While you don’t understand why he’s killed so many people, you promise you’ll –

Asmodeus stops for a moment, thinking. The keys are just an arm’s reach away. If you can just bolt off the bed fast enough and knock him out, you’ll have them. You’re fairly sure that you can overpower your waifish former friend.

“Really?” Asmodeus pouts. “You promise?”

You promise. You open your arms to give him a hug, urging him closer. You two are friends, right?

A moment passes. The tension between the both of you is thick and palpable, as is the silence.

And then Asmodeus is flying into your arms. You find yourself relaxing for a brief second as he sinks into your embrace, holding you close in that familiar way, and you let your guard down. This is the person who so valiantly defended you from harassment during the first few weeks in school. This is the person that helped you clean up your locker after class, emptied the tacks out of your shoes, and wiped off the derogatory scribbles on your desk. This is the person that had bothered to introduce himself on the first day of school, regardless of your status. If this hadn’t happened – if he hadn’t drugged and imprisoned you here – you would have considered him an infallible friend. Now, if you could just shove him to the –

Pain shoots from your shoulder. You turn to see a bright syringe sinking into the skin of your shoulder, the liquid forcing its way into your body. Asmodeus offers you a smile as you sink to the floor. Cradles you as your body goes slack. You mouth wordless questions at him.

“You idiot. You didn’t think I was that dumb, did you?” Asmodeus draws the now empty syringe from your shoulder. He sighs. “I thought you’d have figured it out by now, but I guess you’re still as dense as ever. Guess you’ll need some more reinforcement.”

Your vision blurs. A lock of hair is brushed away from your face and tucked behind your ear. Your limbs are unbearably heavy, your body refusing to listen to you, and your eyelids follow suit.

“It’s okay, though,” he reassures you, placing a quick kiss against your forehead. “Even if your mind breaks, I’ll still love you.”

BEELZEBUB

Despite being on the way to inherit a number of high-class restaurants, you often find Beel doing menial work in the kitchen. It was a sight that had caught you off-guard the first day of your part-time job – one that you haven’t gotten quite used to, actually. Beel explains that it’s best for him to know every aspect of the food and customer service industry, that it takes a load off the other employees, but you don’t quite believe that. You’re pretty sure he’s just there to snack on bread sticks and extra food. Most of the time, anyway.

Still, you can’t deny that he’s exceptionally good at cooking dishes made of ground meat. It becomes tradition to make you dinner after seeing you working in one of his father’s restaurants, which you gladly welcome.

And so you are treated to pub burgers topped with blue cheese and arugula. Spaghetti with wine-infused meatballs and freshly shredded parmesan. Baked mac and cheese filled with ground meat, five cheeses, and cream sourced from a local dairy farm. Shepherd’s pie with perfectly piped mashed potatoes on top. Wild mushroom soup with buttered, crusty bread. Stuffed zucchini drizzled with olive oil. After a long day of both school and part-time work, you gladly clear your plate each and every time.

You watch a news segment on your phone over dinner one evening. A newscaster prattles on about missing students in the area, some of their names seeming vaguely familiar, and you find yourself staring at their photos. While they are suspected to be murdered, it appears that the bodies are nowhere to be found. The killer must have some way of disposing most of the body parts, if not all of them. Anyone with information is welcome to –

Beel reaches over and turns off your phone for you, much to your surprise. There is a strangely serious expression on his face as he informs you that it’s rude to have your phone out at dinner – especially when he’s gone through the trouble of frying up croquettes. A hot plate of freshly fried, meat-stuffed croquettes is placed in front of you, and your thoughts about the strange news segment are immediately dismissed.

Halfway through dinner and with most of the croquettes devoured between the both of you, it occurs to you that you’ve never asked what kind of meat you’ve been eating.

[bentenharuki]

When I read HQ, I decided to research a little on volleyball but of course, my knowledge is just a tad bit better than a novice. There are players who are short, the shortest is only 5' and a half? Can you explain why there would be no Hinata or Hoshiumi in real life?

Hi!

I will try to answer everything, hopefully in a comprehensible way.

There are many questions you've asked beside this one so I will try to put it all together, if you don't mind (you remember your asks anyway...so it should work).

For the part where you quote one of my posts where I tell the Horrible Greedy Mangaka (the author whose name I despise) said like he renounced at developing Lord Kags more, it's from one of his final interviews explaining the future careers (?) of all the players he put in the National Team. He said basically regarding the player who should have been the most talented since the start "he's already great, so what else was there to add"? - which is IDIOTIC because no matter how great of a talent/player you are you NEED to best yourself every day. The more talent you have, the higher is the climb you are destined to have (instead Furudate basically let him stay the same or almost the same as he was at 15 years old: IDIOTIC, as I said.

Furudate has no real perception of the greatness in sport so that was just a way to say "I can't understand a thing about superiorly skilled players, so I cannot say anything more about the character I was meant to refer at as a great talent, and therefore let's leave him in the dust and create a protagonist with zero realism and make people (who cannot understand the sport nor appreciate it fully) identify with him. It will bring me way more money than be truthful, and it's gonna work way better than try to understand the real dynamic of a sport."

This is something that I will never EVER forgive him for. He vilified real volleyball and created fake suggestive ideas about it in people who basically have never ever seen a real match and worse, who have never ever PLAYED it for real at decent level. All of this smells so fake to me, it makes me angry STILL to this day if I rethink about it.

About the height of players, (hoshiumi, Hinata, both under 1.80 by far) sorry, but in no real team of male volley players at ANY good or great level you find people short the way midgets Furudate loves to boast are. This because in modern volley power is the most important quality. It's not even debatable. Shorties are deficient in elevation, weight, strength, power. They will simply get blocked in series, no matter how fast or jumpy they can be. Just take a look at any CEV game, and judge for yourself. In the past 15 years, the heights of team roasters have constantly grown. It's a basic rule which is followed because IT WORKS INFINITELY BETTER AND MORE than any other asset.

Just take a look at the beast roasters in National Teams or in the best volley Leagues in the world (I am Italian, I watch the best players play every year here) and midgets are nowhere to be seen. The more volley develops, the more height and power do count and amount.

Furudate tried to tell a fairy tale: but sport is not a fairy tale: sport is a real path of real, quite heroic and symbolic life.

To play is one thing, if you are short. To play at the greatest levels is another thing. Furudate has so little knowledge of real volley he dared to claim a beach volley training can best your skills. FALSE to the highest. Beach volley is a funny thing, it's an athletic circus, but there are NO connections with the depth and the complexity of indoor volleyball there. Strategy, which is a vital part of indoor volleyball, and which exists because you have MANY players and possible way to make them interact, disappear fatally in outside volley. And this makes the two games like night and day.

Schemes in beach volley are dire at best, and although it is a funny and entertaining thing to play and watch, the ball, the court/ball/net dimensions, the rules are DIFFERENT and there is NO way a real top volley player would ever switch between there and the beach, or viceversa. They are two different sports with little in common, and maybe some help in training there can be found for female players (slower and less athletic than their male counterparts and by definition less powerful and strong), but in male volleyball the skills you can hone by training in beach are virtually ZERO. Especially when you are a top player. You can relax and have fun with beach volley, but it's like having a drink in the heat when you wanna relax. It's nothing like the real thing you wanna do, it's just a break you get some fun in.

Furudate then put everybody and their sisters in the National team, at the end of his AWFUL "final arc" (as i call it, the Fairy Tale Midgets Arc). PATHETIC. It was also blatantly absurd to have as many players as he had become pro. Even in smallest leagues the percentage of players who transition from high school playing to pro are like 1,02%.

In HQ there would be like 20% or something, even around 25% if you count smallest and foreign leagues. It's all part of the fairy tale I despise.

If you want to create a para-sport manga then create a fake sport: one like Blue Lock or Prince of Stride: or you start by putting alienating elements like superpowers (like in Kuroko No Basket, which is clear is only inspired by basket, then it goes for the superpower route but OPENLY), and you stop trying to fake realism in your opera.

They are all valid choices: all, ban the one The Greedy Mangaka did: pursue the money of delusional, not educated readers honing them into believing what they are following and reading avidly is somehow REAL and near to reality of the sport the manga had to depiction and describe.

I call this lying to the incapacitated and I will forever despise ALL of the way HQ became after Inarizaki arc (the best arc of the series, the one that gave me hopes before everything turned out impossibly wrong).

I won't even mention the hate I felt when one of my top characters became even a Country Traitor just to keep having 1264322 setters around.

In NO Country more than Japan to have one of the best characters become a foreigner would have felt wrong and fake.

Japan has a strong, very strong Country Pride and to ditch it to play a sport instead than fight INSIDE your Country to become a valid choice is like calling yourself weak, scared and hypocrite.

And Furudate The As*s dared to make Oikawa (my Oikawa!!!!! The Prideful, talented Oikawa) THIS kind of loser, ditching his roots because he didn't feel he could have reached National Team in Japan??????

PATHETIC.

Fake, Offensive, Pathetic.

No real Japanese would have ever ditched his Nationality to play. Not a single one (because in Japan to become a foreign citizen you RENOUNCE to your first Nationality and this is more or like a capital sin in Japanese mentality. And Oikawa became THAT kind of traitor. Unbelievable. Such a beautiful, deep character trashed to become a belittling loser so into his own world and frustration he couldn't manage to fight for his own place in his own home country. All this is so profoundly anti- sport I can't even detail it. It's just a void of real sport spirit and again it makes me angry any time I think of it.)

Ok... I think I wrote a lot (sorry... I didn't expect this to be this long but it's above than me. If I start to think about this all, I still as bitter and angry and disappointed as ever...).

I hope some of your questions were answered and I hope in a readable way... I am sure I filled this with typos and mistakes but I always write in a rush and it's not easy when this is my third language ... sigh!

Have a nice time and hopefully I made myself clear and cleared your doubts on this all.

Hugs, K.

[sleepywinchester]

Fool For You Pt. 2 ⏤ Oscar Díaz.

Summary: You are back in your hometown Freeridge to take care of your sister Jasmine and your father after being away for six years. You left Freeridge looking for a better life but in that process you had to let go of someone you loved. But you’re back and things are not the same but they sure feel like it.

Words: 4,038

Warnings: Smut (ish) - Abusive Ex Mentions 

A/N: I usually don’t write smutish fics (honestlyyyy i think i suck) but I TRY. On this part things get heated and you guys can see a bit more of their backstory but there’s still so much more to be revealed. 😈

(english is not my first language, might be some typos around)

❤

The continuous loud hard knocks on the window woke you up. Sitting up from the bed you let a loud groan, glaring at your sister on the other side of the window. 

“Open the door!” Jasmine shouted.

She watched you stand up from the bed. After what happened last night you didn’t want to talk about it because you are still processing it. But you knew Jasmine and she wouldn’t leave you alone until you two talked. Opening the door she barged in, standing in the middle of the room and taking a hit of her inhalator. 

Closing the door you turned to see her in the eye, “¿Que?”

Jasmine’s eyes got wide open, “¡¿Que?! LAST NIGHT I CAUGHT YOU ALMOST BONING SPOOKY AND ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY IS ‘¿QUE?’ BITCH I NEED ALL THE DETAILS. ¿Cuéntamelo todo?”

You rolled your eyes walking by her, “I told you I buried that shit when I left.” Turning on the coffee pot, you turned and she was glaring at you. 

“Well it seems like last night he was going to bury his D!” Jasmine shouted.

“JASMINE!” You shouted with wide eyes. “Gosh,” you leaned against the counter.

“In that spot,” she mocked and you rolled your eyes. “Okay fine, I’m being extra but this shit is huge. Like freaking Spooky and my sister? Bitch! Who knew you had it in you?!”

You cocked an eyebrow, “Had it in me? Bitch! I got needs too.” 

Jasmine busted on laughter, “Yass Queen! I can’t believe you’re actually my sister!”

Shaking your head you turned and began to pour coffee. “Anyways,” you looked at her over your shoulder, “Oscar and I have a lot of history. We have known each other since we were kids. We were together until-,”

“you left his ass and went to New York City,” she cut you off completely bluntly. 

Your head tilted to the left as you shrugged, “Pues si, lo deje. I wanted to leave Freeridge, I wanted so much more than just this hood.”

“And he didn’t?” 

“He did,” you sighed and your head dropped. Thoughts of all that could have been rushed through your mind. You and Oscar often talked about a life together out of Freeridge but there was also one major factor in between. Turning around you met her confused eyes, “He couldn’t leave Cesar alone with his mom. She-.” It was so hard to talk about this because his story and yours reflected. “She was a drug addict.”

Instantly Jasmine’s face transitioned into a sadder one. It wasn’t about gossip anymore, this shit was real and it made her think about mom. 

“I’m sorry,” you sat next to her, placing the coffee mug on the table and holding her hand. “This shit hits hard for us especially with mom…” Jasmine was holding in her tears. You felt guilty for not being here for her, she was the one dealing with mom being everywhere but her home taking care of her kid. “Perdón por no estar para ti cuando mas me necesitaste. I know you said you got it but you shouldn’t, you should be going around with your friends being as crazy and loud as you want.”

“I mean I still did that…” she smiled softly, “I just didn’t want to spoil what you had with Alex in NYC.”

“Boo,” you slightly fixed her hair, “that shit was already spoiled.”

She frowned, “What do you mean?” 

“He hurt me, Jas. In so many ways and the fucked up thing is that I thought it was my fault that I deserved that until one day it got out of control and I said no mas. I remembered who I was and my value.” Your voice broke a little, talking made you think about the awful times. Jasmine holds your hand tightly. Showing you she was there for you. “I was at my lowest point but you called me and…” you smiled, “you saved me, mana.”

“I love you, girl. I’m so sorry,” Jasmine stood up from the seat and hugged you so tightly. Knowing you were unhappy and being mistreated made her mad and sad. But you were safe now and she finally had her sister back.

Hugging her built tears in your eyes, “I love you too.” 

She was on her way out when she turned, “I never told you this because it didn’t really make sense but… Santos helped us so much when mom left. They are scary as hell but they take care of their own.”

Your lips created a small thin smile, “How did they help?” 

“Groceries and utilities, papi’s check doesn’t cover all of it,” she shrugged. “Anyways, I’ll see ya at school, need to prep dad before leaving.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll do it. You get to school,” you told her. She smiled and walked away.

You got dressed quickly, put on a pencil skirt and paired it with a yellow blouse that had small flowers and went into the house. 

“Hola pa’,” you spoke sweetly to your dad sitting on his wheelchair. He wasn’t the same man after being deployed in Afghanistan.  Before the war he was the most optimistic man you ever met. He would always have the biggest grin on his face. “¿Te acuerdas cuando me ayudabas con las tareas?” You spoke as you got him ready for his day. “Those were the days and I did not even know it,” you continued. “I miss those days.”

You looked down at him, his eyesight was lost in the background, oblivious of what was happening. A part of you envied that, being able just to be numb to everything happening around. 

“Jasmine?” You heard a thick Mexican accent walking inside the house. 

“Hola,” you said cheerfully walking out of the bedroom to see Milagros, the woman who used to babysit you so many times as a kid was the same person who took care of your dad.

It took her a couple a seconds to recognize the little girl that had transformed into a woman. Milagros eyes sparkled when she placed the dots together. Instantly she flashed a big grin as she walked forward and wrapped you in her arms.

“¡Muchacha!” she exclaimed, “It’s been so long.”

The way she was reacting to you being home made you grin widely. Hugging her back brought memories of when she would pick you and your sister from school and babysit. Every time your mother would go away, Milagros would always be there for your family. She filled the void of not having a mother at all times. 

“Estas igualita,” you grinned. 

She grinned so much her eyes were difficult to find. Cupping your cheeks with her hands she placed a kiss on your forehead. “Estas hermosisima, mija.”

You shook your head, “Not as beautiful as you.”

Milagros laughed and gave you another kiss, “¿Cuando volviste chamaca?”

“Hace tres días,” you told her, “volví y I’m already working at the school teaching.”

“Siempre quisiste ser una teacher,” she grinned, “me da mucha alegría que estés de vuelta. We missed you so much.”

You kissed her forehead, “I missed you too. Take care of my pa’ por favor.”

“Pos claro,” she said glancing at your dad, “I have a full day planned.”

You chuckled and grabbed your bag saying goodbye at the same time you strolled out of the house. Couple of kids rode their bicycles by your house, all of them laughing. 

As you walked down the street the events of last night appeared in your mind. The thought  of that prophet trying to do something made you so nervous. But instead of drowning in your own thoughts, you decided to raise your chin and focus on other things. This was Freeridge and shit like that happened all the time. 

Looking around you noticed a Santo sitting by his porch, he looked at you as he took a drag of his cigarette. Changing your eyesight to another house, another Santo catches your eye. Soon enough you noticed a good amount of Santos outside which was really rare at that time in the morning. 

The sound of a car made your head turn, another Santo. 

“Oscar…” you said under your breath continuing the path to school. 

You had no time left to go and talk to him but it was definitely in your to do list. He had almost the entire Santo gang on subtle escort duty, all of them around the neighborhood from your house to the school.  

That day you saw Cesar and his friends at school talking and mostly scheming, they seemed troubled about something. 

Is he in the gang too? You asked yourself.

That wouldn’t be a surprise if he was a Santo, it was his family’s legacy to be part of that gang. Learning from the past events you left right at four after the bell rings.  Once again a couple Santos were spread around the block. You smirked, shaking your head as you strolled. You wanted to be upset and even mad at him for taking what happened that night to the extreme but there was no way you could be mad at him for making sure you got home safe.  

You thought that after a couple days the subtle escorts would stop but they never did. Couple weeks passed and The Santos were like clock work, always out and watching. Oscar hasn’t been seen around that much, it’s like after that night he got into a business or something. You’d lie if you say you didn’t want to see him because you did but your pride got the best of you and pulled you away from walking by his house and looking for him yourself. 

When the colmado came to sight the thought of a couple things crossed your mind and you went with it. Going in Selena Quintanilla sounded on the speakers, the viejita was dancing to the cumbia behind the counter as she restocked the cigarettes. She looked at you and engaged you to dance with her. Shaking your head you said no but gifted her a smile. 

“Vamos, vamos,” she walked out of the back, continuing to dance. 

You chuckled and slowly following her moves, somewhere else this would be such an unusual thing. In this hood even though everyone was going through their own bullshit, they still put it aside to laugh and have fun. 

Bidi Bidi Bom Bom rhythm was so contagious that La Abuelita did the infamous washing machine dance.  “Come on, mija!” Her smile brought light to the store. You couldn’t leave her hanging and started to do the dance yourself. Dancing to this song brought you memories of your mother teaching these moves to you and Jasmine. You moved your hips in circular motions to the rhythm of the song.

“Se emociona, ya no razona, no lo puedo controlar,” you sang with her. 

You haven’t been or felt this carefree in years, this moment filled you with joy. 

“Bidi bidi bom bom,” she sang, “mijo baila con ella!” 

Turning to see who she was talking to, your sight locked with Oscar’s brown sparkling eyes. You slowly stopped dancing, his grin didn’t show any of his white pearls but his eyes were so bright. 

“Hey,” you fixed your hair, catching your breath. 

“Muy bonita. ¿Que no, Spooky?” La viejita told him.

Oscar looked you up and down, nodding to the lady. “She is.”

She softly patted your hands a couple times, “I haven’t had that much fun in a while. Thank you, mija.”

You chuckled, “Neither have I.” 

“Spooky?” She said his name walking by him, “She knows how to dance and she’s not wearing a ring. Ándale,” Her whisper was everything but a whisper which you thought was hilarious. The old lady patted his arm softly as she continued to the back of the store. 

The two laughed at what she told Oscar. He had both hands inside his pockets as he reached closer to you. Seeing him made you realize you actually missed him after not bumping into him for weeks.

“What up?” He looked you in the eye.  

You shrugged, grabbing a basket, “Nothing much. You?”

“Igual,” he also took a basket.

Oscar and you walked side by side around the corner store both picking similar items. This would be a perfect moment to ask him about the cholo security you felt you had as you walked on the block but you didn’t want to ruin what was going on. 

“You still got moves,” he said as he got a corona from the fridge. He glanced at you, asking if you wanted one with his eyes. You nodded and he grabbed it and placed it on your basket. “La batidora siempre me volvió loco.”

You chuckled, “Everything makes you crazy, Oscar.” 

Oscar smirked at your words, he grabbed a handful of limes that were right next to you. Pouring a couple of those limes in your basket as well. His chest was pressed against you, “Everything you do makes me crazy.” His whisper turned on all your senses throughout your body. 

You grabbed hot sauce, looking back at him to see if he wanted any. Understanding his small nod you grabbed a second one and handled it to him. 

“Any plans tonight?” He asked, grabbing nopales and placing them inside his basket. You grabbed the sweet potatoes next to them and added them to your haul. 

“Aside from grading quizzes and maybe unpacking,” you turned to him, “nada.”

“You still got all those boxes laying around?” You shrugged guilty of being a procrastinator. The click of his tongue was followed by a soft chuckle. “Wanna go to a party?”

You cocked an eyebrow, “Santos party?” He nodded. “I don’t know... Don’t wanna get behind on grading those quizzes.”

“It’s all good,” he told you. Deep down he knew you weren’t the biggest fan of being around his gang and he didn’t judge for that. 

The two paid and walked out of the corner store, you were holding your bags with both hands. The sunset was in full effect, pastels of pink and blue painting the sky. Oscar gazed at you as your eyes were lost in the beauty of the colors. 

Licking your bottom lip, your eyes met with his. “Thanks for the protection.”

He looked away flashing a grin, “You noticed…”

“Your crew is really hard to miss,” you smiled. “Thank you.”

Oscar shrugged, “Just making sure you’re safe.”

Without asking for consent, you tiptoed your way to his cheek and placed a kiss on it. “I know,” you said, turning around and walking away. You looked over your shoulder when you felt his eyes on you. “Te veo, fool.”

“Nos vemos, fool,” he said watching you walk.

The corner store was a couple houses away from your place. You couldn’t see it but Oscar put his bags inside the car and leaned against the hood of his car. Lighting a cigarette he watched you stroll to your house and got in safely. 

/ / / 

Your skin felt refreshed after taking a shower and washing your hair. Only wearing a towel wrapped around your body, you began to look for something to wear.

“Where are my freaking t-shirts?” you roamed around the boxes on the floor. 

There were too many unopened boxes to find the one that had your sleeping t-shirts in them. Meanwhile the ones that were open had everything but you work blouses. The Harley Davison’s ones you’ve been using have become dirty. Your eyes roamed around the floor and found Oscar’s black flannel lying by one of the boxes. You sighed walking towards it and picking it from the floor. Your finger tips instantly feeling the softness of the material. Taking a quick sniff you noticed Oscar’s scent on it and better yet, it wasn’t dirty.

“What the hell,” you shrugged, putting it on. 

You could smell him on the shirt, God how much you loved his scent. Wearing his shirt made you feel close to him even though he wasn’t there with you.

Grabbing a Corona from your fridge, you took a sip from it and began to unpack. You’ve been procrastinating about it for almost weeks now but tonight was the night all of these boxes were going to be empty.

You were drinking the last of your beer when the knock on the door made you look over your shoulder and pause on the sixth box. ‘It’s probably Jasmine’ you thought, not worrying to stand up.

“It’s open, Jas!” You shouted, turning your focus back to the box of old pictures. 

“Not Jasmine,” Oscar's deep voice filled the room.

Looking over your shoulder, you saw him standing by your door with one 40’s on both hands. You stood up quickly noticing how Oscar fully scanned your body. Seeing you wearing his shirt turned him on. How the shirt covered enough to see most of your thighs and legs. It helped that you didn’t buttoned the flannel all the way through, giving him a good sight of your cleavage. He couldn’t help but roam his eyes, admiring every inch of you. 

Oscar cleared his throat, licking his lips before speaking. “You said you were going to be here unpacking and grading papers…” He paused, his eyes were lost on you. “Uh-,” he shook his head, “I just wanted to pass by and maybe help.”

Your eyebrows rose, “You want to help me unpack?”

“Yep,” he spat. 

“Don’t you have a party going on?”

He shrugged with no worry, “Me vale. I can go if you want.”

You shook your head obviously not wanting him to leave, slowly licking your lower lip as you walked towards him. He took a deep breath once you were in front of him. You smirked, grabbing one of the 40’s, “You can stay and help. I’m actually opening the old picture box.”

He watched you turn and sit on the middle of your bed. Oscar having a seat by the edge of it. You handled him your beer for him to open and watched him twist open his.

“I was wondering where my flannel ended up,” he teased, grabbing the box next to him and opening it. 

“I actually didn’t see it until today. Needed clean clothes and,” you looked down at the flannel, “this was clean enough.”

Oscar chuckled softly as he started to take out old photo albums. 

“I can give it back if you want…” you teased.

He glanced at you over his shoulder, “Keep it, te queda mejor a ti.” 

You smiled at his response, looking down to the photos laying in your lap. There were a couple of you with baby Jasmine in her crib. Your abuelita always got you guys the biggest and colorful bows.

Oscar looked back at the album on his hand, brushing through the pages he found an old picture of the two of you in High School. “Mira,” he said.

You got slightly up and looked over his shoulder. Oscar clenched his jaw and his breathing began to get heavy as he felt you so close to him.

Flashing a grin you chuckled looking at your younger self sitting on his lap both with big wide smiles. “This was the first day we missed school to go to the beach.”

Oscar nodded with a small smile, “Si.”

“Todo era mas fácil,” you let out a sigh.

Looking at him, Oscar continued to look at the picture with nostalgia. You wished to be able to listen to his thoughts. Once again you were unsure if you should do what you felt. Kneeling next to him, you rested your chin on top of his shoulder. 

“You remember what happened that day?” you said softly. 

Oscar looked over his shoulder locking his brown eyes with yours. “Como olvidarlo.” 

You smirked, “We didn’t know what the fuck we were doing.”

He clicked his tongue, “We still enjoyed it though.”

“Hell yes,” out of habit your lips touched his skin for a second before placing your chin back on his shoulder glancing down to the picture. 

Oscar froze, his sight going down to your lips as he licked his and looked up back to your eyes. Being that close to each other was the only approval both needed to do what both were craving. He pressed his lips with yours, his right hand grabbing the back of your neck as he kissed you with passion. Your body followed your instincts and got on top of him. His fingers roamed inside your hair as his lips moved in sync with yours. 

The taste of his tongue is warm and lemon from the beer. He moaned when you bit his lower lip, listening to his moan turn you on even more. Your hands were holding the back of his neck. You could feel his hardness between your legs as you slowly moved your hips. 

His hands went under the flannel shirt you were wearing, gripping on your thighs and his fingertips finally finding the thin waistband of your panties. You stood up for a second, eyes locked with his as he slid them off your body. 

You wanted to tease him, you wanted him to build up the level of him wanting you. Slowly you began to undo your buttons, Oscar growing impatient. 

“Don’t tease, mami,” his voice was so deep and his accent so thick it made your skin tingle. He reached a hand over to you but you stood back, clicking your tongue as you moved your index finger left and right. 

“Paciencia, Oscar,” you said softly. 

Oscar smirked looking down at his lap before looking up to watch flannel drop to the floor, his hand reaching your nalgas and gripping tightly, pulling you forward. Looking down to your hip, he realized the black ink still on it. “Todavía lo tienes?” Oscar’s eyes linked with yours.

You looked down to the small cross tattoo on your hip. Turning so slightly you gave him a better look of it. Oscar’s hand touched it, reminiscing of when you first got it. That night was one neither was able to erase. 

“Damn,” he caressed it, “that was the night we-,”

You cut his words with another passionate kiss. He ignored his thoughts or what he wanted to say and continued tasting your lips. Oscar turned you over, laying you flat on the bed. You looked down at him, biting your lower lip watching him take his clothes off. His strong arms flexed as he crawled on top of you leaving trails of kisses all over your body, moans escaping with every kiss he left. Your lower back arched while your eyes shut to the sensation.

“Mírame,” he said, kissing right under your belly button. 

Biting your lip, your eyes locked with his, “I-,” you moaned when his hands cupped your breast. 

“Use your words, mi amor,” he said against your delicate skin. 

His tongue danced in a way only Oscar fucking Diaz could make it dance. He knew all your spots and how to work them. Your hands gripped the sheets of your bed tightly as you bit your lips holding the loud moans that wanted to escape your inside. 

“I can feel you holding your moans out,” Oscar told you, his look full of lust and hunger for you. “Let it out, bebe. Let it all out.”

“Fuck!” you let out a loud moan as he continued to eat you. In a matter of seconds he built you up back again. With every second, you could reach the stars more and more, until there was a full explosion. “Oscar!”

He kissed his way up to your lips, “Así me gusta.” 

“Me llevaste a las estrellas,” you kissed him. 

“Si?” He arched an eyebrow, his hand on your hip. Oscar kissed first kissed your chest, then kissed the left side of your collar bone. He left a trail of wet kisses all the way up your neck. He kissed your earlobe, you could hear his steady breathing. 

“Tonight I’ll take you to the whole damn galaxy,” he whispered in your ear.

______________________________________________________________

CHAPTER TRES

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[accendimi]

Are You Lonesome Tonight {Desrina}

TW: Binge Drinking, Drugs, Fade Out Sexy Times. Time: August 13-14th Weekend after the Swynlake Dream TL;DR: Sarina and DeSoto jet away for the weekend to get their heads out of the classic Swynlake bullshit. Being the little shits they are, they play a game that gets very real but let’s Sarina realize she has a family she never considered before.

Introducing Sarina Sykes.

We started this before the event and then realized the timing was perfect so the beginning doesn’t ref the event but just refer to the other Para.

Part One: I Need Your Love Tonight

@desotosykes

SARINA

It wasn’t a quick flight by any means but when you had the money and the motive things moved very quickly. It helped when you had a partner willing to partake in the mile high club to make things even a little more fun.

Because wouldn’t you believe Sarina had never been to Vegas. 

Lights, Sex, Fun in the Sun. It sounded like a fun time for the girl that didn’t have any gigs lined up for the week and with DeSoto by her side it sounded like a great time. 

At the moment they were bar hopping Sarina’s little black dress hiking up as they walked through the city her arms wrapped around DeSoto’s a blunt hanging from her lips.

“You know what would probably get us a few free drinks. A proposal.” 

DESOTO

As much fun as being in Swynlake with one of his favorite partners-in-crime was, DeSoto craved time away from the not so often sleepy town. He’d had his fill of wacky Swynlake bullshit so when Sarina had mentioned the idea of a getaway, he was more than on board. Her idea of Vegas only solidified that notion.

More than a few drinks in and the eldest Sykes brother was feeling all sorts of good. He had his own arm wrapped around Sarina as he plucked the joint from between her lips and took a long drag of his own. “Probably get us more than a few,” he snickered as he stumbled just so slightly. Money clearly wasn’t a problem for them, DeSoto was more than willing to spend his money on Sarina and this little getaway. But fucking with people that had no clue who they were? That would never get old.

“Figure I can give yous this t’make it look real.” He gestured to his free hand where he wore the ring he stole from his father way too many years ago. Taking another long drag from the joint, he handed it back to Sarina with a smirk. “Guess dinner’s about t’be interesting, ain’t? Ham it up maybe even get dessert free too.”

SARINA

Sarina took the blunt with no argument bringing it to her lips. She missed nights like this. Towns like Swynlake were impossible to mess with (at least in this regard) too small and everyone thought they knew everything. DeSoto and Sarina getting hitched. No one would bat an eye. But here where they just looked like a smoking hot couple. It was perfect.

They looked like a power couple honestly.

"Now now Des you're truly going to steal my heart if I get a ring that you wear every day." With the blunt between her fingers Sarina set her hand over her heart with a wink before handing it back to him.

"Then we truly need to go somewhere expensive. Make it a show they won't soon forget. What do you think about Joël Robuchon?"

DESOTO

When he’d been much younger and, arguably, a little more dumber than he currently could be considered, DeSoto Sykes was a ladies man. He still was a ladies man but he didn’t sleep around as much as he did when he was younger. All that to say that he definitely knew how to steal hearts and break them. It wasn’t his fault that he was such a charmer or that girls were typically entirely too romantic for their own good.

Still, he returned the wink after taking a drag of the blunt with a smirk. “You mean I didn’t already have your heart to begin with? Guess yous really are just keepin’ me around for my looks.” He teased her, fully knowing that neither of them were in this for emotions. At least nothing as substantial as romance and love. 

Even if they currently looked like they were a couple and acted like one.

“Joel Robuchon? Fancy. Yous gotta play the part of clueless while I talk to ‘em. Think yous can handle it?”

SARINA

“Well they aren’t bad looks, now are they? I could be keeping you around for the money which would you prefer?” Sarina’s heels clicked with them moving and she knew both of them were getting looks in the best way. Well in a way both of them liked.

“Don’t worry I’ll put on my best blonde impression and they’ll know nothing. They won’t even know we’re a few drinks in and looking to have some fun. I’ll look the ever loving girlfriend.”

DESOTO

If he was honest? DeSoto didn’t really give a shit either way. The man grew up with probably the world’s shittiest dad. Someone who made sure his kids knew, especially as they got older, that he only kept them around because they were good at their jobs within the family business. A trait that definitely transferred over to DeSoto. He was just… less vocal about it. 

But this wasn’t a therapy session. It was a trip to Vegas with, arguably, one of his best friends. And he had a good buzz on just like she did and they were being their usual shit head selves with each other. 

“Both’a us know it ain’t the money, babe,” he smirked with a slight pinch to her arm. “But it ain’t matter. S’long as I get t’spend time with you.” He tried his best to keep a straight face; a feat that was just a bit harder than usual with the drinks and drugs currently in his system. “C’mon. Ain’t that far away.”

SARINA

Sarina placed her free hand over her heart looking up at DeSoto as if she was completely swooning over the very thought. And it was sweet and Sarina recognized she had made great connections since being here and that would mean everything to her.

But beyond the impending proposal they didn’t need to be sappier.

Walking into the restaurant Sarina bounded up to the hostess glancing at the reservations with a quick glance.

“Hi I’m so sorry we’re a little earlier than expected but we have a reservation in about an hour under the name ‘Thompson’.” Sarina grinned brightly at the hostess, memorizing the information to call and cancel this little Thompson reservation and send them on a little goose chase to make sure her and Des had all the time they needed.

“Oh hello Ms. Thompson, let me see what I can do and if I can get you two in.” The hostess slipped away and Sarina smiled at Des. 

“Let me go cancel the reservation for those two and you let me know where we’re sitting.” Sarina popped up on her toes to kiss DeSoto on the cheek as the hostess came back.

“Sorry business call I’ll be right back. I’ll be one second love. Business deals just can’t get done without me.” Sarina tacked on with a pretend sigh.

DESOTO

It took all of DeSoto’s willpower not to smirk as Sarina sweet talked the hostess with the most endearing smile. Really, the hostess made it all too easy to take advantage of the system. Instead of smirking, however, he just grinned as he wrapped an arm around Sarina’s waist and pressed a quick kiss to her temple. “I’ll be here waiting, darling.” 

That smile stayed on his lips as Sarina flitted away, phone pressed to her ear. Really, he could have very easily gotten them a seat without such a fuss but, well, where was the fun in that?

Turning back to the hostess, he pulled his hand from his pocket and showed her the ring that typically sat on his right hand. “We’re high school sweethearts, yous know. Been together a long time.” He watched with an inward smirk as he saw the hostess’ features soften even more than they had been. “We were waiting to have a stable income and all to get married but then… her ma got sick so it kinda put us back. This is the first vacation we’ve had in a few years and I figured now would be the best time t’ask. Yous think yous could help me do somethin’ real special for her? Make it a night she won’t forget?”

SARINA

The hostess did melt as she looked at the ring and then out at the girl who had left. What a sweet pair and gorgeous too. She couldn’t imagine they didn’t come from money considering how they were dressed but the mention of a sick mother and just, oh she could see it happening.

The pair against the world, finally getting a stable income. Only for her mother to fall sick. They take care of her and maybe she passes, maybe the mother tells them to go on and enjoy their life. 

And that ring was most definitely a family ring.

“Of course. We should be able to celebrate with a bottle and a dessert. I’ll look into it for you as soon as we sit you down.” 

All the while Sarina was outside waiting the time out. But then she saw the familiar glint of a ring, one that she thought DeSoto might like. Now it wasn’t as fancy as his family ring but it would be a nice touch if needed.

Turning her ankle slightly Sarina pretended to stumbled into the guy laughing and giggling, drunk off her ass. “I’m sorry,” She giggled. “Or am I you’re cute.” With one hand going up to his cheek the other took the hand that was steadying her and slipped off his ring. As he reassured it was okay she brought her hand to her chest slipping the ring into her bra.

“You should find me later. If you do I’m sure we’ll have a good time.” Kissing his cheek, Sarina stumbled into an hidden corner to wait him and the waitress out and when the coast was clear she strolled back in palming the ring into her clutch as she wrapped an arm around DeSoto smiling brilliantly at the woman as they were led in. 

“You’re in luck we have the best table reserved for you. I’m sure you’ll enjoy your visit with us.” Seating them the hostess all but ran off and Sarina raised an eyebrow. 

“What’s our sob story?”

DESOTO

It was easy for DeSoto and Sarina to follow the woman as she led them to a rather impressive table. Secluded and candle lit. Entirely too romantic for the two of them but perfect for a couple about to get engaged. He thanked the lady as she walked away and then gave Sarina a shit eating grin. 

“High school sweethearts,” he explained with a roll of his eyes. “But your mom got sick so it set us back a bit. I’m proposing tonight since it’s our first vacation in years.” It wasn’t the most inventive lie but it worked on the sap of a hostess and would work on the rest of the idiots working the restaurant. 

When the waitress came over, Des didn’t have to even ask for a bottle of wine. “The finest wine on the menu, on the house.” A subtle wink was offered to DeSoto as the waitress poured two glasses and then set the bottle down in a small bucket of ice. “I’ll give you time to look through the menu. If you need anything just wave one of us over and we’ll be glad to help you.” 

Des nodded with a smile as he took Sarina’s hand gently. “Thank yous. We’ll call if we need anything.” Turning back to Sarina once the waitress was gone, Des smirked. “Pick what yous want. M’sure the whole meal’s gonna be comped. Shit. Could probably get a swank hotel room if we’s play our cards right.” 

SARINA

Sarina brushed her hair back giving both Des a show and she knew some other boys were looking too. It was cute as they tried not to having been on dates with their own significant others. 

“That’s easy enough to remember then again we won’t need it after the night.” It would be even funnier if it dropped and they tried to run them out. Both Des and Sarina could get out without a second thought. 

“Then let’s do their fancy four course whatever it is. Let them treat us. Honestly how do businesses stay in business and be this gullible.”

DESOTO

If DeSoto were a more possessive man, he’d be pissed at all the looks Sarina was getting. But he wasn’t possessive and he was getting the same sort of looks from those boys’ girlfriends. It was fun seeing the looks of longing. As if somehow in some different universe, DeSoto would be a good boyfriend and Sarina would make a good girlfriend. It made him want to laugh, though all he did was smirk as Sarina gave her own little show to those around them.

“Dunno. Works in our favor, though, ain’t?” He smirked before laughing. It was probably because they were soft. Emotional. They lived for these kinds of things. Engagements and anniversaries. Anything to celebrate. But who needed a special day to celebrate? Hell, he’d gotten tickets for them to Vegas just for the hell of it. Sarina hadn’t been and Des hadn’t had anything super important to do, so why not?

Calling the waitress back over, he grinned when he told her they’d like to have the four course meal, complete with the best dessert. And of course, he’d be more than willing to pay for their meal.

SARINA

The meal was fabulous, it wasn’t outside of Sarina’s budget, she liked to steal high value so she could live high value. But it was nice to share a fun time of mocking the employees with someone. At least she could always trust Des with that.

And he wasn’t wrong throughout the whole meal they played into the emotional card. Every once in awhile Sarina would look up at Des with those eyes full of wonder and amazement. She would reach out and just tuck a strand of hair back up and away from those beautiful eyes.

“You spoil me love.” Sarina knowing she was within ear shot as their dessert was delivered. “Better late than never and it was well worth the wait.”

DESOTO

The waitress had given DeSoto a small warning when they were about to bring out the dessert and Des easily excused himself so that he could slip his ring off of his finger and give it to the waitress to hide in their dessert. 

Oh was the restaurant about to get the best show of their lives. 

“You deserve the world, dearest.” He smiled back as their dessert was set in front of them. As expected his ring was nestled on top of the rather decadent looking cheesecake. All he had to do was wait for Sarina to notice for the real fun to begin. 

Before she was able to really put on the show, Des rose from his seat so that he could kneel down next to her chair. 

“This…. Shouldn’t be any surprise… You’ve been the love of my life since we were fifteen. And I’ve known you were the woman I was gonna spend the rest of my life with since I was sixteen.” He paused as he wiped a fake tear from his eye before taking his hand in hers. “I know things ain’t…. Ideal but why wait anymore? Marry me?”

SARINA

Sarina spotted the ring easily but took a moment to really spice it up her eyes widening as she looked between the dessert and DeSoto, back again until he got up and got on one knee. With on hand in his Sarina lifted her other hand to cover her lips and then when a fake tear rolled she lifted that hand as if to fan the tear away.

Nodding her head, Sarina fell into his arms taking his face in her hands to kiss him.

“Yes yes yes.” She repeated when she pulled away resting her forehead on hers. “I’d marry you this second if I could. I love you.” 

DESOTO

Sarina was good. If he was on the outside looking in he’d definitely think this was a real proposal. The way she teared up and fell into his arms? Perfect. It made it all too easy, really. 

One arm wrapped around her while the other cupped her cheek gently as he kissed her back, the smile not leaving his lips as their foreheads pressed together. He kissed her again before taking her hand in his and slipping his ring onto her finger. 

An idea formed then and he couldn’t help the slight smirk that formed on his lips. Why not see just how far they could take this? They were in Vegas after all (and entirely too fucked up to be making decisions). 

“Let’s get married then. Right now,” he huffed out before pressing another kiss to her lips. “I’m sure there’s a chapel close by. We can do a big wedding later.”

SARINA

The ring slipped onto her finger and Sarina admired it, and that was actually true. She could only imagine the stories behind this ring and what exactly Des had done while wearing it. 

“Wait- Wait-” Sarina gasped out for a breath, pretending to be overwhelmed for the crowd and it was a crowd, their hostess, the waitress, even who she suspected was the manager. “I- well I got you something too.” Reaching out without leaving his arms Sarina grabbed her clutch pulling it toward her looking like she was stumbling but careful to hide any of the cigarettes and worse that she had in there.

Pulling out the ring that she had stolen earlier she held it up to him. “My mom gave it to me when she passed. It was the one she got my dad for their engagement. I’ve been carrying it with me since. So yes, let’s get married. I don’t think I could wait any longer.” The sad thing about that was Sarina actually did have her parents wedding rings. At this point they were locked up safe but she wasn’t about to leave that with her brothers. 

The awes could be heard throughout the restaurant, and Sarina spied the waitress talking to the manager and him nodding. The show was good enough wasn’t it. What great publicity, and a story to tell everyone.

“Go, we’ll box up the dessert. Get married. You two have been waiting long enough.” The waitress whispered coming up to them and Sarina looked up at DeSoto with a smile.

“Let’s go get married.” And while she had tears in her eyes and she was pretending to be breathless she knew he saw the amusement in her eyes.

DESOTO

The show was going so well. Everyone in the restaurant truly believed what he and Sarina were saying. They were the only ones in on the joke and it was so hard to keep from losing his shit laughing. Neither were sincere at all. But, at their core, they were con artists. The best, it seemed. 

Still, Des wrapped his arms around Sarina and held her close as she looked up at him. “Alright, love. M’sure we’s can find someone t’marry us. Can make this part of our honeymoon.” Smiling softly at her, he leaned down to press a soft kiss to her lips while everyone around them cooed at their little display. 

At the behest of the waitress and her boss, Des stood and reached for Sarina’s hand. He was not gonna pass up the chance to get out without having to pay a bill. Even if he could afford it, they were doing #themost just for the hell of it. 

As soon as they were out the door, he shifted to wrap an arm around Sarina’s shoulders and laughed. “Yous sure yous weren’t an actress before? They was eatin’ outta our hands,” he chuckled. “Where’d yous even get that ring from?”

SARINA

Sarina moved to wipe the tears from her eyes with a grin. “Maybe I was but then I actually had to listen to direction and that sounds like a bad time.” Hopefully all Sarina’s past lives were this exciting, and hopefully all her future ones would too.

After all. Die Young. Have Fun.

“When I stepped out to make that call it was fate, this guy had a ring that I thought you might like. I might have invited him to play later but I doubt he’ll be able to find me. Though with your possessive streak it might just make the night hotter when we do have our honeymoon.” Sarina teased. Spotting a club with a line out the door.

“Think we could get in? And keep the party going?”

DESOTO

It was easy to follow Sarina’s line of sight when the line was as long as it was. He hadn’t seen a line for a club that long since he’d been in New York. Of course, he’d never had to wait in a line that long before. All he had to do was give his name and he was in with whoever he wanted. He knew it’d be no different now, too; though he wouldn’t give his name, just flash that pretty family ring on his lovely partner’s finger.

“Course we can get in,” he huffed. “Look at us. And with yous layin’ that charm on? We’s in without a problem.” 

Moving past the line, all while eyeing the people lined up and waiting, Des tucked Sarina closer and put on the same dopey grin he’d had at the restaurant. “Might as well figure out who’s you want t’share before we reach the door.” 

He smirked as he pressed his lips to her cheeks as a cover to why he was so close to her. It only added to the image they were playing with. The naked eye would see only an intoxicated and in love couple. Not two devious masterminds plotting their next bit of fun. 

“Hey, man… my fiancée’s been dyin’ t’get into this club all night. Said it was the best place t’celebrate n’shit. Yous think you can help us out?” He gave his best hopelessly in love look to Sarina before turning back to the bouncer at the front. “We’ll make it worth your while, aint?”

SARINA

It wasn’t hard to fall into the roll again, the doting and absolutely in love fiancée. Even as her eyes trailed over all the people in line. If any of them could handle her and DeSoto together. Smiling up at Des, Sarina slowly turned her eyes to the Bouncer who looked less than impressed.

“Lots of people want to get in, you two will have to go back to the end of the line like everyone else.”

“Baby do you hear that? Like everyone else. We’re not just everyone else? And he even promised to make it worth your while. Something no one here would have the means to do.” Sarina whined a little bit, like a spoiled little rich girl who expected to get her way.

“What’s the offer then?” The Bouncer asked glancing around quickly before returning to an unamused expression.

DESOTO

It was… beyond irritating that this guy wasn’t buying any of the bribes. It made him wish he’d taken her to New York; even if that was an insanely stupid idea. At least then he wouldn’t have to work so damn hard to get into clubs that probably were subpar at best. 

But he didn’t let that show. Instead he gave a sheepish grin as he pulled Sarina closer. “Well, for starters money clearly isn’t an issue here. Unless… yous lookin’ for somethin’ else. More… fun.” He smirked as he pulled his other hand from his pocket. 

The little baggie he revealed contained a good variety of pills. Mostly uppers that were only going to enhance their night. Party favors, really. They were celebrating after all.

“Or if that’s not your bag. Well, m’sure my fiancée could have some fun with yous. She’s amazing in the sack.”

SARINA

Well slow down there Dez. Sarina turned her attention to him with a raised eyebrow. Now would she have some fun with him. Potentially. Did she like being pimped out. Not at all.

“Only if I think you’re worth my time you’re better off taking the party favours.” Sarina instead stated as the man did look over the bag, Sarina had no idea what Des had in there but it was all good stuff she was sure and it looked like the man was actually considering it.

“Fine, you guys can go in. This stuff better be the good ones, Or I’ll drag your ass out myself.” 

With him stepping aside to let them in, Sarina poked at Des’ chest. “No pimping me out again. Even if he’s hot. You can have him for yourself if you really want to.”

DESOTO

Was it his brightest idea? Not at all. He’d had worse but he was only focused on the goal. Getting into the club. Which they did. So technically he was going to count it as a win. Which was the reason why even though Sarina poked him not so gently and offered that warning, he still smirked. “Hey, got us in, aint? And yous ain’t hafta to do nothin’ except look a little mean.” 

He slung an arm around her as they moved further into the club. They definitely picked a good one. The music was hot, bodies packed the dance floor, and everyone looked like they were ready for a good time. Drink girls were walking around scantily clad and Des took no time in grabbing two drinks. “Consider it my first apology of the night for attempting t’pimp yous out,” he grinned as he handed one of the shots to Sarina. Clinking their glasses together, he took his shot easily and deposited the empty glass onto another drink girl’s tray. 

Scouting the place out it wasn’t hard to find where the life of the party was. It was a large group, a mix of guys and girls that were already pretty inebriated and loud. Perfect for what Des and Sarina had in mind. “Think we found our new suckers. Ain’t gonna hafta spend a dime tonight. Ready t’lay on the charm?”

SARINA

Sarina rolled her eyes when she took the drink. Irritating bugger, but she did like the thought of multiple apologies throughout the night. She would give him a pass for now and only now.

Glancing over the group Sarina grinned throwing her hair over her shoulder and nodding. “Got any extra party favours in there for us?” Sarina questioned with a grin before they joined the group.

And DeSoto hadn’t been wrong in his assumption, people kept calling for shots whenever they saw the ring and heard the sob story. Forgetting it and being reminded again and calling for more shots. That paired with whatever DeSoto had provided, Sarina was on a nice cloud.

“You guys should get married right now! Why wait!” One of the girls screeched out. “There’s so many places to get married. We can all come and be your witnesses. OMG we could find you some sexy lingerie as a wedding gift. It could be your something new!”

While the screeching was unpleasant the story had been repeated so many times the you know why not? Go with the flow. Really seal the deal.

“We could get married right now. They are right.” Sarina slurred just a bit throwing her arms around his shoulders as she kissed his neck. “Have a wicked honeymoon with the gifted lingerie.”

DESOTO

The party was beyond pumping. Their little group was the life of the party. People gathered around them like they were honey and Des loved it. The girls crowded around Sarina, all squealing and giggling and screeching, while the boys congregated with DeSoto offering congratulations and lewd comments about his partner. The drinks didn’t stop flowing and every once in a while a party favor would appear from DeSoto’s pocket. 

Best to keep the party going. 

He was feeling good, the mix of alcohol and drugs flowing through his system freely, and had an arm draped around Sarina’s waist. They’d just finished another (free) round of drinks and he’d made the decision to endure the screaming and screeching girls for it. Even laughed as they suggested getting married right then. 

“Mmm, think we’s already havin’ a wicked time,” he grinned as he raised a hand to lift her chin up to kiss her. “But yous wanna get married? Let’s do it. Always wanted t’get married by Elvis.”

SARINA

They were having an wicked time but suddenly it just seemed like a good idea to get married. Why not? It was all for fun and they had been swinging that story around all night, it sounded better and better the more they talked about it.

“How else would I get married? I’m not a walk down the aisle in white type of bride.” Sarina stated easily, it was true. Sarina had never thought of it for herself. She hadn’t ever like the idea of getting married, being locked down into a family that would shackle her to the ground.

But now it felt like a good idea, a fun idea. Why not was the overall response.

“Why not?” 

With all that as confirmation the girls tugged on Sarina. “We’re getting her a dress. Boys go get him a suit We’ll text you where to meet and the next time you see each other you’re going to be getting married.” Another screech. And god Sarina was sure her ears would burst.

DESOTO

Everything was happening in even more of a blur. While the beginning of the evening was still pretty clear, Des was losing coherency bit by bit. Not that it mattered. This was supposed to be a fun trip, a trip where he got to have fun and fuck with other people with one of his favorite people. And that’s what they were doing. 

And also getting married but whatever. 

Before he even had a chance to question it his newfound friends were dragging him away from Sarina and out of the club. “Man we gotta get you something awesome for your wedding! It’s Vegas bro! Gotta go big!” One of the men clapped him on the back before jumping up excitedly as they walked down the street. Des couldn’t help but laugh and shake his head. “S’a Vegas wedding. Gotta be ridiculous, aint? Gotta find somethin’ cheesy as fuck. My girl’ll appreciate it. Trust me.” 

They made their way into a suit shop that looked promising. It was filled with designer suits that, if he wasn’t high as hell, he’d buy. But that wasn’t what he was looking for. No. If Desoto was getting married in Vegas he was gonna get married in the worst fashion he could think of. Which alternatively meant it was the best fashion. Everyone knew Vegas had its own culture, it’s own ideas of what true fashion was. 

And why not emulate the best of them?

He saw it in the back and knew immediately that whatever the cost he was gonna buy it. It looked exactly like something the King would wear and tonight? DeSoto was the King. 

“Alright boys. Target acquired. Gotta get yous some ridiculous accessories and then we’d good t’go.” He grinned as he draped the suit bag over his shoulder and headed towards the wedding chapel. 

SARINA

The girls were on two trips one to get a dress and two to get what went underneath. And Sarina had no problem modeling or stripping in front of them. And while they did stay with the traditional white, it had a high slit and a deep back. Sometimes it felt lucky that it even stayed up.

But that’s what Sarina wanted and paired some sexy lingerie the girl was set.

Sarina truly couldn’t remember how they got from there to the chapel but she was standing in front of it, her other outfit forgotten somewhere but it didn’t matter considering the things she did consider important were the jewelery she kept from her family. 

But now music was playing (she didn’t know what) And her and Des were being summoned down the aisle while all these random people watched.

DESOTO

As usual, Sarina looked absolutely gorgeous. It took all of his power to keep his hands off of her because with everything running through his system all he wanted to do was strip that dress off of her. But there were more important things they had to do. Like meet Elvis. 

The man had just finished crooning Teddy Bear when they reached the end of the aisle where Sarina’s new girlfriends and DeSoto’s new guy friends were waiting for them. Standing in his spot, Des grinned as he took Sarina’s hands in his. 

“Alright, alright. We’re gathered here today in this house of love to wed these hunk’a hunk’a burnin’ loves,” Elvis started, swiveling his hips in a near perfect imitation of The King. “If there’s any suspicious minds out there thinkin’ these two need to go to the hearbreak hotel say your peace. It’s now or never.” 

With no one saying anything, Elvis returned his attention back to Sarina and DeSoto. “So tell me my little hound dogs. Do you take this groovy lil mama to be your lawfully wedded wife?” Des smirked as he nodded. “Course I do.” 

SARINA

Sarina hadn’t actually noticed it before, her music taste wasn’t exactly Elvis after all. But now seeing DeSoto and Elvis side by side she was having a hard enough time keeping the laughter at bay.

Especially for something that was supposed to be as serious as wedding. But she had way too much in her system to worry about that. 

“And you do you take this hound dog to and promise to love him tender love him sweet?” Elvis turned his attention to her and Sarina had to quiet her giggles to respond.

“Of course I do.” That’s why they were here after all.

“Now with those good luck charms on your fingers already, it proves you just need one night to get stuck on each other forever. I pronounce you Husband and Wife! You may kiss your bride!”

DESOTO

DeSoto didn’t waste any time as Elvis said he could kiss his bride. He wrapped an arm around Sarina’s waist and pulled her close, even went as far as dipping her as he kissed her deeply. He’d never had a thought of getting married. Hell, Roscoe constantly teased him about the fact he hadn’t settled down. But at the moment this felt right. Very right. 

At least that’s what his heavily intoxicated brain was telling him. 

The group that came with them whooped and cheered before running over to congratulate them. Des laughed, keeping his arms wrapped around Sarina. “Yeah, yeah. Thanks guys,” Des chuckled, pressing a kiss to Sarina’s temple. “But, uh, me and my wife have a little less conversation planned, if yous know what I mean.” Wiggling his eyebrows he pulled himself and Sarina away from the group. 

“Go have fun and celebrate for us,” he smirked, tossing them a baggie of assorted pills and some cash. The least he could do for all the help they’d been. “Me and my lady are gonna go have a private celebration.” 

SARINA

Sarina laughed as Des dipped and kissed her. Phones went off and in theory that was a good thing because there was no way they would remember this in the morning. But Sarina didn’t care about details like that. 

No she was much more excited about the private celebration they were about to have. And where. And with DeSoto’s gift she was sure the group was more concerned about their own private celebration as well.

Splitting up from that group, it wasn’t hard to walk into a fancy hotel and get a honeymoon Suite. Even plastered as they were, they were smart (debatable considering they just got married) and could handle themselves (Again debatable).

But Sarina was having fun so she didn’t care, Tugging DeSoto into the elevator, Sarina didn’t waste anymore time dragging Des into her and kissing him, setting his hand by the silt on her dress.

DESOTO

DeSoto easily anticipated Sarina’s attack in the elevator. They’d been behaving all night. Keeping their hands mostly to themselves in lieu of their little game. It made it all the more interesting, he felt. Built up the tension for when they finally decided to call it quits. 

Tension that Sarina couldn’t handle by the time they got to the elevator. But neither could DeSoto. He responded eagerly, fingers curling in the hair at the nape of her neck as his other hand slipped up her leg using the slit there as access to push the dress farther up. 

“We’s gonna get kicked out puttin’ on a show like this,” he huffed against her lips as the elevator dinged with each floor. It didn’t stop him, however, from resting both hands on her hips and squeezing. 

SARINA

“We’re newly married, do they really think we can keep our hands to ourselves.” Sarina joked just as breathless against her lips. Her accent back to it’s normal Italian, having lost focus hours ago to keep it at the English one.

“I bet you anyone watching is just enjoying the free show. We could make it a good one for them if we would like.” Further and higher the dings went. Especially because Sarina didn’t want to stop.

DESOTO

“Only if yous want to, my hunk’a hunk’a burnin’ love,” he huffed, shifting his grip so that he could lift her easily. Wrapping her legs around his waist he moved to kiss her again while he shifted to push her against the back wall of the elevator.

The dings went ignored as he took his time working Sarina up. It was his favorite thing to do considering most of the time she gave as good as she got. 

“Ahem…” a voice interrupted him and made him groan just slightly from where he’d been nipping at Sarina’s neck. Turning just slightly to the intruder, Des raised an eyebrow. “Sorry, we’s celebratin’.” A fake apology for an annoying person who definitely muttered something under their breath. Des didn’t care though. Not when they were close to their room and the real fun could begin. 

SARINA

Sarina pouted when DeSoto stopped, tightening her grip around his waist to bring his attention back to her. “You know we just got married you should be congratulating us.” Sarina added waving and wiggling her fingers in the direction of the other eventually just giving them the middle finger when they muttered under their breath.

But honestly it was a surprise Sarina hadn’t accidentally given any sort of slip, then again Des at her waist his chest against hers, she was pretty secure.

Either way Sarina drew him back in until the other got off and they continued to rise to their floor.

DESOTO

By the time they got to their floor, DeSoto was more than ready to be off of the elevator. There was so much pent up energy coursing through him that he could barely contain himself on the elevator. Whoever was watching from the lobby got quite the show as he and Sarina groped and grabbed at each other, both barely keeping the rating below X-rated. 

The show continued in the hallway as he stopped every few feet to push her against the wall as if showing her what was coming once they got into the room. He couldn’t stop touching her, didn’t want to. 

Finally pushing the door to the suite open, Des fumbled in closing it behind them as he pulled Sarina closer once more and kissed her deeply. “I think it’s time we got outta this. Someone promised sexy lingerie and I wanna tear it off yous.” 

SARINA

“Feel free to tear any of it off. I don’t hold any sentimental attachment to it.” As long as her family ring and now Des’ ring on her stayed safe, Sarina didn’t care. “Though you’ll have to buy me clothes in the morning. Not really sure where the dress I came here with ended up.” Trying to think back on the night they just had was nearly impossible. 

Dropping her legs from his waist Sarina pulled away so she could start sliding it down.

“Unless you want a show of course.” 

DESOTO

Des grinned as Sarina pulled away from him even though he missed the heat of her body. This was his favorite thing about mixing all his vices. Everything was heightened and he could never get close enough to whoever he shared the night with. It didn’t matter if he didn’t remember it in the morning. All he cared about was the moment they were in, satisfying every craving he and his partner had. Now, it was whatever craving he and his wife had. 

“We’s can probably get somethin’ from the gift shop n’then do a proper shopping trip for clothes. Think I’d be dumb as fuck t’say no t’a show from yous,” he smirked as he took off his ridiculous scarf/sash and undid his shirt to let it hang open. “Show me what yous got.” 

Moving to grab a chair, he sat in it and placed a hand in his lap all but waiting for Sarina to start whatever show she was going to put on for him.

SARINA

Sarina laughed and giggled and overall just let her guard down, not only was she with one of her best friends, and could now call her Husband. (Weird yes) But she was having fun, coming down off this one wasn’t going to be as fun though.

Until then Sarina promised a show.

Travelling her hand up her thigh slowly Sarina gave him the briefest glance at the red she wore underneath and the thin strings that connected it.

Turning her back to him Sarina brought her hair to the front slowly letting the dress fall and kicking it aside. Finally she turned to face him all the little straps connecting the top and bottom and yet none of it showed from behind.

Brushing her hair back Sarina grinned sitting on his lap. “It wouldn’t be fun if you couldn’t touch as I pulled the rest off.” 

DESOTO

There was something… different about this time with Sarina. His feelings about her were still the same (even if they had recently gotten married) but there was something between the two that had changed. Or at least that was how DeSoto felt at the moment. Who knew if it was just the drugs and alcohol or if there was some truth to the way he was currently feeling. 

All that mattered was Sarina in his lap with the sexiest lingerie he’d probably ever seen. 

His hands traveled to her hips while he took in how little she wore and how well she wore it. “How’d yous know I liked red?” He teased, pulling lightly at one of the strings before letting it go so the he could trail that hand up her side. 

SARINA

“Who doesn’t like red?” Sarina teased reaching back to unhook her bra almost completely bare to him and yet he was still dressed in the ridiculous get up. Pulling away once more Sarina stepped out of the rest and walking to the bed. 

“You can join me but you should match me first in what you’re wearing and only then will you be welcomed in this bed.”

DESOTO

“Insane people probably,” he responded easily, though was quickly side tracked as she slipped the bra off. After that all train of thought left him and all he could do was work off of instinct. As she got up he followed her, making sure to get rid of his Elvis outfit in the process. No way was he going to jeopardize this night by insisting his outfit was perfectly suitable for joining her. 

~~~~

Sunlight peaked in front the slightly open curtain and DeSoto couldn’t help the low groan that fell from his lips. His head was throbbing and the direct sunlight, no matter how slight it was, was not helping anything. Rolling over, another low groan left him. His body was sore but in a familiar way, a not unpleasant way. Just unexpected. 

The details from the previous night were fuzzy as hell and as he reached to close the curtains more completely he frowned. His ring was gone. Turning back to look in his clothes, his frown deepened when he saw an overly flamboyant Elvis impersonator suit instead of the black one he’d been wearing when they touched down. 

“What the fuck?” He swore lowly as he wandered around the rather large room, only taking notice of Sarina curled up in the bed he’d all but fallen from. “Hey… ‘Rina, wake up.”  

SARINA

Sarina didn’t want to wake up everything hurt, her head most of all and her throat beyond dry. Even at Des’ voice she yawned and buried her head back into the pillow. At least it wasn’t another Swynlake dream.

Slowly she peeked at him with one eye open and one closed as she yawned.

They were in a room and it was just them, nothing to really write home about yet. “What’s up? Did you wanna get food or something.” the more she moved the more she felt the weight of her rings differently. Weird.

DESOTO

This wasn’t anything different for one of their romps. So he wasn’t exactly panicking. He just… wanted to know where his ring was and… and why he was wearing a completely different ring. On the wrong hand. What in the actual fuck had happened last night? 

“Nah… yous ain’t seen my ring, aint? I ain’t gamble it away or trade it for this thing?” He asked as he took off the new ring and showed it to her. “Yous ain’t think I did somethin’ stupid with it after we left the restaurant?”

Was it dumb that he was upset about losing his father’s ring? Yeah. Probably. Especially since his dad was a complete piece of shit that would kill him on the spot if given the chance. But it still held sentimental value to DeSoto. Was still the one thing he wanted to keep from his bullshit family. (Other than his brother of course but that went without saying)

“D’yous even remember anything after we went t’the club?”

SARINA

The concern in Des’ voice actually had Sarina sitting up grabbing the blanket to cover herself a little bit. “No I don’t really remember anything about the club.” Sarina lifted her left hand to rub the sleep from her eyes pausing at the weight. Instead she held it out infront of her blinking at Des’ ring on her ring finger.

“Well I guess this solves that question.” Sarina held her hand up so he could see the ring was at least in the room with them and not lost to some random betting table. Glancing around Sarina looked at both his suit and her white dress and the red lingerie, which the later wasn’t surprising but a white dress.

“Do you know where your phone is?” His ring was on his ring finger, she had his on her ring finger and there was white suit and a white dress.

Sarina wasn’t sure this could go anywhere other than what she was thinking. Where was her phone?

DESOTO

His ring was on Sarina’s ring finger and Des was officially perplexed. Vaguely he remembered a fake proposal at the restaurant. Had they swapped rings so they could fake being married too? He could see how it would benefit them. This room, for one, was a fucking suite. They could have hosted a party and had people stay over if they’d wanted to. But from the looks and sounds of it they were completely alone. 

“Nah. I woke up and shut the fuckin’ curtain cuz the sun was blinding me.” Over dramatic? Absolutely. But Des was hungover and confused. He was allowed to be a bit of a drama king. 

Rummaging through the pockets of the disgustingly bedazzled suit, he found his phone and moved back to the bed. “I got a shit ton of texts from numbers that ain’t saved…” he trailed off as he opened the texts.

Each text thread was nothing but pictures. Pictures of him and Sarina at the club with a shit ton of strangers. They were clearly having a great time celebrating their fake proposal and judging by the amount of strangers in each picture they’d made plenty of friends. “Who the fuck are these people?” He huffed as he continued going through the texts. 

Nearing the end it became all too clear why Sarina was wearing his ring on her ring finger. “Apparently we made good on that fake proposal…”

SARINA

“Yes yes.” Sarina nodded along with his dramatics pulling the sheet from the bed so she could wander around her mess of clothes. (After double checking her family ring was still on her.) It would actually be smart to get Des’ off her incase she needed to use magic. If it wasn’t enchanted to withstand the heat from her blasts it wouldn’t survive.

Eventually she found her phone in a manilla envelope just as DeSoto spoke. And yup there it was… a marriage license with their names on it.

“Looks legal too.” She flipped the paper to show DeSoto. “Uh- this is weird I mean I can burn it and we pretend this never happened?” Sarina offered grabbing her phone and flopping back onto the bed. Just the movement hurt her head and she was ready to go to sleep even when she started to thumb through all the photos that had been sent to her. “Or does this make me Sarina Sykes. It’s got a ring to it.” Sarina joked coping with humor. 

DESOTO

DeSoto settled back into the bed easily, feeling the fatigue in his bones wanting to take back over. Still he took the marriage license from Sarina and looked it over with furrowed brows. He’d never contemplated marriage, never really thought he would get married. It didn’t matter to him, really. It’s not like he wanted to settle down and have what Roscoe had. He was perfectly happy being single. 

“Hate t’say it but even if yous do burn it there’s probably another copy’a this,” he shrugged as he handed it back to her. 

Laying back he let his eyes slip closed as he sighed lowly. “And s’probably more work getting it undone than it is t’get married here. S’just easier t’stay married cuz I dunno if I can be fucked t’even get back outta bed today.” A truer statement had never been spoken by DeSoto. It’d been a good while since he had partied quite that hard. Sleep sounded beautiful. 

“But we’s can do whatever yous want,” he shrugged again. “Does got a ring to it, though.” 

SARINA

Marriage, that wasn’t something Sarina had ever considered, never even considered staying in place long enough to meet someone and want to get married let alone have the time to do so.

She wasn’t a romantic, she had lost faith in humanity a lot time ago and didn’t trust enough people to give her heart to. Des was one of them but just in a way that was very different than for people that wanted to get married. 

“Honestly, I don’t really care, it’s not like it’s gonna change our lives. Neither one of us is in love with the other and I don’t see us ever being in love with each other like that.” A piece of paper didn’t change that. Maybe she was still a little bit of a romantic. Wanting what her parents had.

Lifting her left hand up she looked at his ring on her hand. “After that dream- I mean, I ran away from my family Des. Never told you guys that. After that dream, I keep thinking about dying alone. Doesn’t really feel like I’ve been a Go, in a very long time. Not sure they even think about me anymore.” Sarina really was just alone at this point.

DESOTO

He could have fallen asleep once Sarina said she didn’t care either way. They were on the same page, at least. They cared about each other but they weren’t ever looking to get married. At least now the both of them had a scapegoat of sorts when people asked. They were married to each other, now all they had to do was avoid questions about starting families and shit. Something they could easily do. 

But then Sarina brought up the dream and he knew that despite being tired, neither one of them were going to go back to sleep. There were things to unpack, things they had tried to run from by going to Vegas. 

So instead, he shifted to sit up and lean against the headboard and wrap an arm around Sarina so he could pull her closer. 

“I—- I get it,” he started quietly. “Me and Ros… we did the same thing sorta. But we got our own definition of what being a Sykes is. A little bit of our upbringing is in it but mainly it’s just us deciding what we wanna be. If your family don’t think of yous? Fuck ‘em. Yous got a family here. With me and Ros. Or whoever yous want. They can’t accept yous or somethin’ then yous too good for ‘em.”

SARINA

Moving with the touch Sarina curled into DeSoto. Maybe it wouldnt be bad being married to your best friend. There was barely any tax benefits though considering most of their work was illegal.

It was just Sarina wished she could agree with him. Fuck them. But it wasnt that easy, she was the bad guy in this situation.

"It wasnt that, my parents were killed at a magick rights protest, for the longest time my brothers and I always went with them fought with them. When they were killed I stopped fighting, the boys didnt. But I had to step in as a primary caregiver to them. They were utterly useless. I was the one that abandoned them." The dream just brought the guilt back stronger. 

"Used to have a secret identity and be a vigilante if you would believe it."

DESOTO

Okay. Okay. DeSoto had no idea how to deal with dead parents. He wanted and actively planned how to kill his own father. He wasn’t a good guy. Had never been a good guy. Part of him couldn’t believe that Sarina had once been one of the good guys. But—- she hadn’t ever really opened up to him like this either, so there had to be truth to it. 

“What made yous leave ‘em?” He asked it carefully, making sure to keep his hold on her light so that if she wanted to distance herself she could. Some family things were tough to talk about. There was a lot that he didn’t talk about or even acknowledge so he definitely understood that. 

But he wanted to know more about this part of Sarina’s life. Especially if it was something that was bothering her this much. He could be a safe place for her if that was what she needed. 

SARINA

"I was going to break, even when I was in University I was falling down a rabbit hole that I could barely see the light of. We were there fighting for magick rights and it was thrown in our faces, or we would try using our powers to help someone and we would be looked at like monsters." Sarina had planned to go into early education. She had wanted to help.

"The boys never saw it like that, they would keep helping but they lacked common sense. Would rush in without even thinking about it. Our parents held us together. Without them… I couldnt do it. I stopped caring about helping, I stopped caring about the things I couldnt control. I could kill myself over it or I could try to live. The boys wanted me to fill the void my parents left and I couldn't do it." The more she spoke about it the guiltier she felt.

"This ring is a family heirloom." Sarina held up her right hand for Des to see the simple silver band. "Enchanted to handle the heat from my energy blasts." 

DESOTO

There were times that DeSoto actually forgot that Sarina was a Magick. He’d seen her use her magic but it still slipped his mind. Maybe because it wasn’t in your face like some but whatever it was he often treated it like out of sight out of mind. It didn’t matter to him that she was a Magick. Did it mean he cared about every other Magick out there? Absolutely not. He still thought there needed to be better policing of them out there but those thoughts didn’t pertain to her. 

“That ain’t your fault, y’know,” he said instead. And it was true. Not wanting to be and do what her brothers wanted wasn’t wrong in any way. A hard concept to grapple with but true all the same. “I mean… I ain’t the son my pops wanted. And— yeah it sucks but, end of the day? I’m my own person.” Even if it wasn’t true and Des was always destined to be a follower. 

Taking her hand, he looked over the ring before locking their fingers together. This was, perhaps, the most tender he’d ever been with someone. “Don’t feel bad yous couldn’t be something someone else wanted yous t’be. ‘Sides, yous wouldn’t be married t’me if yous had been.”

SARINA

Sarina let out a small laugh at that, leave it to Des to boil it down to something so simple. But he wasnt wrong. If she had stayed she wouldnt have met Des or the people she cared about at the Court.

Never would have met Drakken and dealt with his antics. She might not even be here still if she had stayed. 

"Maybe one day I'll be strong enough to check in on them. But right now you think it's okay to weasel myself into your family. Be a Sykes." She wouldnt go around calling herself one, they might be married but they werent about to boast about it unless the situation needed it. 

But it was truly more for herself than it was for other people. 

“Do I get to keep the ring then?”

DESOTO

Sarina’s question was a silly one. Even though they hadn’t been married before she was still a part of his family. He cared for her just as much as he cared for Roscoe. Their bond was unbreakable. But he knew this was a rare moment for the two of them. A small bit of vulnerability shared in the quiet of the morning. 

It was a new and terrifying type of relationship for DeSoto but he knew that Sarina would never betray him. 

“Course yous a Sykes. Was one before we got married,” he huffed even as he pulled her closer. “Be a great addition to the family.” 

Shifting so that they could both lay down again, Des shrugged at the next question. “Long as you’s don’t melt it? Sure.”

SARINA

Sarina smiled against his chest, maybe it wasn’t the most conventional marriage and maybe they would get divorced one day. But the very thought of this giving her a place to call home no matter what. It was kind of nice.

For someone who had her guard up all the time, it was nice to be vulnerable for once.

“No melting, don’t worry I have a way to make sure it’s fine.” And it seemed like a trip back to Italy was in order, it was about time she at least kept her parents wedding bands with her again. Maybe she could stop running in pieces.

But for now, sleep was good, curled up against her husband, they would deal with anything else after they woke up again.

[queenypew]

Happy 4th Anniv Yav!  (◕‿◕)♡

October 29, 2020

Hi baby! 

I made this for you. My message this time will be a bit lengthy kasi mag tthrowback ako sa about satin from the beginning hahahaha like how we started and the things I felt about you since day one. Hehehe. Grabe four years na tayo parang kahapon lng na meet kita HAHAHA srsly i will never forget how and when we met. Because i really cherish those times with you.

Oh yes, Lovebeat, ang punot dulo ng lahat. The dating game. Hahahaha. At first i really didnt expect anything when I joined the game, not even finding a BF. But I did searched for some company and made friends. I think I met you several times in the game pero hindi lng ako nag mind kasi syempre strangers really dont matter to me, tas nakiki AFK lng ako kahit sang room hahahahaha. Even when I knew as a friend from a friend, parang wala lng hahahaha. So ayun nga, I think what really caught me was when you helped me back then, don sa parang ewan na stalker na manyakis na manliligaw ko dati sa lovebeat HAHAHA and i really appreciated that help from you. Tas after non lagi na tayo nagkakausap and I was there for you whenever you needed someone to listen sa mga probs mo. I was a bit conscious to feel anything about you kasi nga online lng but I knew you were sincere and kind. May pagka pabebe ka lng tlga dati hahahaha pero tanggap ko yun. 

I think nagka interest na ako lalo sayo, especially we keep spending our nights chatting. So ayun nga at that time, wla akong ibang inask or be someone to you, amidst sa mga nangyare dati, I just wanted you to be happy. Nalulungkot ako sobra that time whenever nagsshare ka sa probs mo tas lagi ko iniisip na sana maging okay at happy ka na. Na di mo deserve yung mga yun kasi nga mabait ka. I really wanted to be there for you, and I was thinking that maybe if I keep staying beside you, you’ll be fine, you’ll be okay, kasi alam ko gaano mo tiniis ung nangyare dati. Ayun lng nasa isip ko. Hahahaha. TBH di ko tlga akalain magkaka develop tayo ng feelings sa isa’t isa. Tas ung nag confess ka na sakin (not sure if u still remember but) I accepted your feelings. At first akala ko sympathy lng tlga na feel ko sayo but it wasnt, iba eh alam kong iba. So I gave us a chance. We didnt really started na goody2 ung relationship, it was bad actually. Hahahaha. Ang daming issues nangyare but then nagslowdown ung phase natin to “Tayong Dalawa” nlng, and we started to isolate from those negative stuff tas naging stable tayo halfway.

Dumating yung time na nagsarili na tayong dalawa, we focused sa IRL interactions than playing tas minsan nlng naglalaro. Pag naglalaro tayo, we only have each other. I thought ako lng nkakaisip na good thing yun para saten but you also thought the same. We both had similarities and likes but we also have differences and despite having all that, we try to grow and help each other.

Ang napa bilib ako tlga sayo is you’re very CONSISTENT. Umaga tanghali hapon gabi, natawag ka sakin. Nangungumusta ka, kung kumain na ba ako, naligo etc. Kahit nsa school ako natawag ka pa din sakin. And even until now ganon ka pa din gosh HAHAHAHA ikaw na tlga! I really love that about you. You never missed anything. It warms my heart everytime I think about it until now. Kinikilig pa rin tlga ako sayo simula noon gang ngayon.

Of course, because we love playing, we play games together (until now) and kahit tayo lng dalawa na eenjoy ko sobra ung paglalaro. Hehehe. Playing games with you was our other world. It didnt matter to me if we meet new friends or kahit wla mn okay lng din because I got you. Ganon na feeling. I never get tired when it comes to you. I’m always up to anything bsta makasama lng kita, makausap kahit sa game lng. Playing together was and will always be our quality time. 

UNTIL WE MET IN PERSON--

Pinaka malaking dagok sa buhay natin HAHAHAHAHAHA.

I was really nervous to meet you in person, tas di tlga ako makapaniwala you will be coming for me. It was an unexpected event for the both us, for what will happen to us next. Because really di ako nag expect aabot tayo sa ganon na point. Agad. I was really fine with us communicatind within the distance and kahit LDR tayo you made me feel like you were near so I really didnt gave a thought about what having you near me literally. But also alam ko gusto din tlga kita makasama and when I saw you, I was really really happy! Naging awkward ako sayo at first but you took it away. 

TBH the first months were hard for us. Ups & downs tlga tayo, and adjustments. It was really hard because everythign was new to me and to you as well. It was STRESSFUL. I get mad a lot, nagtthrow ako ng tantraums at you and we just fought terribly for small things. Well I knew it was me tlga who’s always at it. It amazed me how can you handle these things about me. You really stayed for me, no matter how many times I get mad, you stayed for me until the end. Grabe tlga ung patience mo. As-in grabe (gif presentation for the bravest mark you did)

HAHAHAHAHAHA. 

But after that phase, it slowly changed us, it changed me especially. I cherished our relationship even more. Tas ni leless ko na din pagigng matigasin na ulo ko. I’m really grateful that you still accepted me despite sa mga nangyare satin yav. I’m really happy you stayed for me. I knew I had to be better not just for us but for myself (like you always said). 

You’ve been there for me literally for better and worse, and grabe how lucky I am to have someone like you yav. All around ka tlga. You did your best around my family (si mama at mga kapatid ko di na nga ako kinakampihan kapag may away tayo kasi alam nila ako yung palaaway HAHAHAHA kainis). You did your best supporting me (by any means), emotionally, mentally at kung anong *tally pa yan. At sa mga times na I keep giving up on myself, you never gave up on me. Seriously. Naiiyak talaga ako sa mga times na yun pag naaalala ko and you were just there hugging me making me feel better. 

Thank you so much baby. We’ve been through a lot. Like a lot talaga. Hindi enough ung mga to para mapa feel ko sayo how much everything and you mean to me. I’m beyond blessed to have you. Really. You’re too much for me. But you’re the kind of much I wanna take in talaga. 

Thank you baby for eveything you’ve done so far for me. And sorry dahil napaka palaaway ko sobra. T_T Sorry talaga sa mga times na naging maldita ako sayo. And I hope we continue growing together positively. I hope ikaw na talaga kasi ikaw tlaga yung gusto ko maging partner now and in the future. I really love you yav! Unconditionally and faithfully. I really love you so much.

Happy Anniversary to us baby! To more years, away (hahahahahaa) and love to come! 

Love (your one and only yav na dyosa),

Queenie Angel

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN THE ARTS USED. IT BELONGS TO HJ-STORY. THANK YOU SO MUCH <3

[javier-djarin]

Como Me Duele: Epilogue

Ship: Javi x Reader

Rating: M

Word Count: 2,057 words

Warnings: Language, Soft!Javi

Masterlist

(Gif by @pascvl)

Summary: Just a glimpse into the life of the Peñas. 

A/N: As they say, all good things must come to an end. This is the last part to this fic. I have toyed with the idea of doing one shots to fill the time between Chapter 12 and now, since there is a significant time jump. But those are a ways out. Thank you again for all the love and support! I love you all so much and absolutely love the comments you send me! Please let me know if you want to be on my tag list for any future fics! I have a few lined up. As always, the translations are at the bottom.

15 Years Later

Mariana was stretched out on the pool deck soaking up sun, with Olivia next to her. Marcela was helping Y/N in the garden, pulling weeds and picking vegetables while Jaime was playing catch with his little brother, Javier. It was the middle of June in Laredo, which meant that it was hot, but it was nothing compared to the heat of Colombia. A heat their children never had to experience, but heard stories about. Only the twins had ever been to the country where their parents’ story started, but they were too young to remember any of it.

Javi walked out of the barn, having just finished watering the horses, and wiped the sweat from his brow. He looked around their massive backyard with a large smile. Seeing his children made his heart swell with such happiness, that sometimes he was afraid he’d wake up and it’d all be a dream. But then, his gaze found her. She was covered in sweat and specks of dirt in her swimsuit top and sports shorts as she weeded the garden, but he’d never seen anything more beautiful. Every time he saw her, he found his footing. This was all real; she was real. Seventeen years together, fifteen years of marriage, and four kids later and he was still as in love with her as the day he saw her in that red dress. He smirked at her when she stood up and he saw the sweat glistening off her skin, dripping down between her breasts. “You checking me out, Mister?” She laughed, approaching him as she wiped her forehead with the back of her hand.

Javi smiled at her and wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her close. “Siempre, mi hermosa,” he said.

She grinned at him. “I look gross right now.”

He shook his head. “No, Hermosa, you look as perfect as the day I first saw you in your apartment.”

He smiled wide at her, a few more wrinkles appeared around his eyes over the years, just like her, but he was still her Javi. She blushed at his comment and replied, “After all these years, you still make me blush.”

Javi leaned down and met his lips with hers, kissing her delicately. She reached up and lightly tugged at the hair near the nape of his neck and smiled into his kiss. “Careful,” he growled, “you know what that does to me.”

She laughed and kissed him again.

“Get a room!” Mariana shouted from the deck.

Javi looked up and smiled at his daughter before dipping Y/N and giving her a very passionate kiss. They both grinned against each other’s lips as they heard the rest of their children groan in disgust together. Marcela came over and dropped the vegetable basket on the ground in front of them. “Can’t you just wait until tomorrow? Do this when you aren’t here?” She laughed.

He looked at his eldest daughter. She was a spitting image of his wife. Honestly, both of his beautiful daughters were; his hermositas. “When you find the love of your life, you’ll understand one day. And I hope your kids are just as disturbed,” Javi laughed.

Marcela wrapped her hand around him, and he held her close. “Does that mean I can go out with Ryan when you get back?” She asked.

He looked at Y/N slightly horrified. “Ryan?”

She looked over to Marcela. “Your father and I will talk about it tonight,” she said, giving her daughter a wink. 

Marcela smiled and grabbed the basket again, heading into the house. Javi turned to his wife. “Ryan?”

She rested her hand on her hip and glared at him through her sunglasses. “I told you about him, mi amor. He plays on the baseball team and they do debate together.”

Javi’s eyes grew wide. “Is he that boy that drove here two weeks ago?” He asked, suddenly concerned, “he has a car.”

“Javi, she’s going to be sixteen in a few weeks. It’s time we start to let her grow up.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “Ryan is a very sweet boy. Besides, you should count your blessings. Everyone is afraid to date the daughters of the famed DEA Agent who brought down both Pablo Escobar and the Cali Godfathers. I’m surprised Ryan worked up the nerve,” she laughed.

“He. Has. A. Car, Hermosa.”

“Good,” she said, “then we don’t have to drive them around.” She gave him her doe-eyed look he couldn’t resist.

Javi let out a long nervous breath. “Nothing was ever going to prepare me for this day. They’re growing up way too fast.”

“It seemed like just yesterday the four of us packed up and moved back to Cali.” 

He kissed her before bringing her to his side as they walked towards the house. “Speaking of packed…”

“I’m going inside to shower…” she began.

He gave her his trademarked devilish grin. “Oh?”

“You’ll get plenty of that this week, mi amor.” He laughed at her. “Anyway,” she continued, “I was going to finish laundry and finish packing.”

“Well, don’t pack too many clothes,” he whispered into her neck. 

She gasped and slapped his shoulder. “Go practice with your sons. Jaime has a game tonight.”

“What time are your parents getting here?”

“They’ll be here before Jaime’s game. Dad is driving us to the airport. Steve and Connie said they’d meet us at the ballpark, since Olivia is here. They’re staying the night so we don’t have to make extra stops tomorrow. We can go straight to the airport. And then, this time tomorrow the four of us will be sitting on a cruise ship sipping cocktails.”

Javi smiled. They made a point to do trips with The Murphys as often as they could, especially since the girls were so close. But then, every summer, the four of them would escape for a week sans kids. This year, they decided on a cruise to celebrate The Peñas’ fifteenth wedding anniversary. Steve actually suggested it, and the girls were sold. Javi was obviously eager to get away, and wherever his hermosa wanted to go, he would follow.  

***

It was late after Jaime’s game, and the adults were sitting on the deck. Y/N’s parents turned in early, so that left Javi, Y/N, Steve, and Connie. Javi had her pulled into his lap, hand wrapped around her waist as they sat laughing about old times. Both Javi and Steve’s beers ran out, and so she and Connie offered to run inside and fetch them some. Steve waited until they were gone before he said, “Do you ever feel like you’re living in a dream?”

Javi nodded. “Every damn day.” They sat in silence for a minute. “You know, I never thanked you,” he said.

“For what?” Steve asked.

Javi took a deep breath and sighed. “For everything you did that day,” he added. They never talked about that day. Despite the fact she survived, he never wanted to relive it.

“It’s no big deal, man. You would have done the same thing.”

“Steve, if you weren’t there keeping a level head and doing what I should have, she might not have made it. I owe you everything.”

Steve smiled at him. “I’d do anything for you two. Besides,” he laughed, “It’s in the handbook. It says your partner has your back when you get shot, your wife gets kidnapped, when you’re getting married, but tells you when you’re being a dumbass.”

Javi laughed at Steve. “It all worked out, didn’t it? Even after you threatened me to leave her alone.”

Connie and Y/N rejoined them. “I knew you wouldn’t listen,” Steve said.

“Does he ever?” She said, handing Javi his beer before returning to his lap. 

Connie grinned. “Not as long as I’ve known him.”

“He called her ‘forbidden fruit’ the first time I said to back off.”

She turned to look at him. Her eyes rolled as she looked down at his big grin on his face. “Forbidden fruit?”

“Damn right,” he said, his grin going into that same devilish look he always had. 

She lightly kissed his lips. “Who knew I’d marry someone so cheesy?”

“Solo para ti, Hermosa.”

Steve laughed. “So, Javi, Connie tells me Marcela has a date?”

“Thanks for the reminder, dick.”

Giggling, Connie said, “When Olivia invited her first date over, Steve wore his badge.”

“I sure did,” he said, tipping his bottle at Javi, “he had her home fifteen minutes before curfew.”

Javi smiled. “You wanna have a barbecue that night. Two DEA Agents might have him back here fifteen minutes after they leave.”

“Shooting some clay birds while we wait.”

Y/N looked at Connie, shaking her head. “You two are insufferable. Ryan is a good boy.”

“No,” Javi said, “Dusty, is a good boy.” Motioning to the dog at their feet. “Ryan is a boy.”

They laughed. “And she’s our daughter,” Y/N said, “I do believe the first time we went out, your persistence in the backseat got you nowhere.”

Steve chuckled and nodded. “I believe she called you harmless at one point.”

Javi glared at him. “Fuck you, Murphy.”

Y/N smiled and ran her hand up and down his back. “He was! Connie and I were dying over him practically tripping over himself. He could hardly form sentences during that car ride.”

“In my defense,” Javi said, “it worked.” He motioned to her in his lap.

“Three weeks later,” Steve added.

“Again, fuck you, Murphy.”

Steve finished his beer and stood up. “Well, now that Javi has told me to fuck off twice, I’m heading to bed. See you bright and early tomorrow.” Connie got up to follow him, but he stopped at the door. “Happy Anniversary, you guys.”

Javi held his beer up to Steve and Y/N smiled as they retired for the night. “It’s hard to believe it’s been fifteen years,” Javi said, finishing his beer.

She turned in his lap, so she was straddling him as she ran her hands over his chest and shoulders. “You know,” she grinned, “that night at the club, I only danced with Rodriguez to piss you off.”

“Oh, it was obvious, Hermosa. Which is why I danced with that nurse.”

“I won that game,” she added, kissing him.

“You always win.” He returned her kiss. “I did always wonder about something. What did you tell Kate about me before we got together?” His hermosa blushed and looked away. “Now you’re embarrassed? I would think what we did last week in the shower would have been more embarrassing?”

She laughed and pushed on him. “After the night of the club, I told her that I had this neighbor who was hands down the most attractive man I have ever seen. I told her while we danced, I’d never felt so alive before and that I would look for any excuse just to have your hands on me. I also told her that it was so obvious you looked for similar excuses to touch me. So, when you picked me up and tossed me in that Jeep, she made a comment about it. When we got back to my apartment, she told me that she’d never seen someone look at anyone the way you did at me. As angry as you were about Lara, she watched you sneak glimpses of me, and vice versa. She was so annoyed it took you as long as it did to do anything about it.”

He laughed, and ran his hands down her back, cupping her bottom to pull her closer to him. Javi looked up into her eyes with so much love and adoration as she returned his gaze. Her hands rested in his hair, holding him steady - tethering him to his reality. He had a few tears in his eyes. “I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you, Hermosa.”

“Me neither. It scared me at first, because my heart ached to have you. And I can’t imagine it any other way.”

“El mejor tipo de dolor,” he smiled.

She leaned down and rubbed her nose on his. “Sí, y como me duele,” she said, smiling before she kissed him just as passionately and deeply as they did the first time all those years ago.

Translations

Siempre - Always.

Solo para ti. - Only for you.

El mejor tipo de dolor - The best type of pain.

Sí, y como me duele - Yes, and oh how it hurts.

Tag list

@magneticbucky​ @larakasser​ @pedropascalownsmyheart​ @wander-lustbabe​ @frietiemeloen​ @wickedfrsgrl

[the-great-imagines-of-1812]

To Love Another- Prologue

Jo March x Fem! Laurence

A/N: Feedback is appreciated!! Look back to previous post about summer writings for more info on this. But basically, your Laurie’s (Theodore’s) twin sister, practically his best friend. Instead of falling in love with Laurie (which she doesn’t) she falls in love with you, another woman; this type of relationship was shunned/frowned upon at the time. Enjoy! (Spanish Translations by me, I’m fluent) (Also, i don’t know what month little women starts off in, so I’m making this up)

Reading below the cut!

Barcelona, Spain. August 2nd, 1868.

“Fernando!” you called for your assistant Fernando, a older teenage boy who also interned at your art gallery who came through the door just as you set your paintbrush down in a mug of dirty water.

“Sí, señora, que pasó?” (Yes ma’am, what happened?) he said, catching his breath from running up the steps to the tiny apartments where you lived above the gallery. 

“Hay Correo?” (Is there any mail?) you said, untying your apron and  placing it on a hook on the wall. 

He took several letters out of the front pocket of his apron and counted them. “Tres de ellas, señora. Tome usted.” (Three of them, ma’am. Here you go.)

You gave him a smile and tossed him a sack of coins. “Aquí está tu pago por la semana, Fernando. Vete a casa. Ten un buen fin de semana. Te veo el Lunes!” (Here is your pay for the week. Go home. Have a nice weekend. See you Monday!)

Fernando gave you a smile and ran his hands through his hair and left you alone.

You go downstairs with the keys to the gallery and a gas lamp, locking up the doors to the gallery. 

You go back up to your apartment and glance at the three letter you had placed on your night stand. You smiled as you recognized all three of the letters. The first one you saw was from your brother, Theodore- or “Laurie”- as everyone would call him.

You opened it with care, and a paper and a  golden locket slipped out. He was always so thoughtful. 

July 20th, 1868

Dearest Sister,

I’m already having enough with the formalities. I miss you, Y/N. You must come visit me in Paris sometime. I know I know, you’re married to your work. But you’d like it here. The art is never ending, there are galleries upon galleries filled with artwork I just know you would love.You who you would also love? the ladies. Oh hush, i don’t mind to know that you love another. If James had ever taught me anything in our days of schooling, it was to be open-minded to new ideas of the universe. Maybe i should buy a of  art piece and send it to you? From the bets museum, of course. Or would that be to much? Even as a gift? Speaking of which, Happy Birthday to us! I was so happy to receive your letter with the tiny drawing of the Eiffel Tower. Do you really think that’s what it looks like? You’d have to come see it for yourself! Enclosed I send you a locket which I bought from a street vendor selling his jewelry near the River Seine. Inside is a photograph of us, with grandfather, of course. Think of us when you see it. I hope to see you soon. Please write back as soon as you can. I long to hear how Fernando’s doing. Ha-Ha, hilarious, miss him too, funny boy. Well not boy, almost 18! But I also miss you. Write back soon.

       I’m obviously sending you that painting.

                   Your Brother, Theodore “Laurie” Laurence.

You smiled as you ran your fingers delicately over the locket and then clasped it around your neck. You reached for the next letter. You smiled as a small, pocket sized sketch of a park fell out. 

July 24th, 1868

Dearest Friend,

I long to see you! You have no idea how much I long to talk about you about Art and Literature. When we next see each other i already know we could sit and talk for hours and hours on end to talk about the great literary works of Charlotte Bronte, or even Jane Austen! How I admire them! We could also attempt to recreate the great works of Monet, but I’m sure we couldn’t as nobody- not even you nor me- could be as great as a painter as him. In here I include a sketch I made while sitting on a park bench the other day. Why, you ask? for your birthday, of course! I had also encountered Laurie the other day, and he talks so animatedly about your latest works. I wish women in France didn’t feel such a duty to their husbands and fight for their own careers. I must see your gallery when i come visit.

             Only the very best, Amy March.

You smile as you looked at her sketch, and placed it on your bedside table, where you had another sketch of hers, a sketch of the Seine River, which from all you had heard, you longed to see how beautiful it was.

There was one last letter that you would’ve missed if it hadn’t just fallen to the floor. You picked it up and opened it. It was the shortest out of the three, and it clearly got straight to the point.

July 14, 1868

Hello, Y/N

I hope this letter finds you in good health and prosperity. How is Spain? I’ve heard all about your blossoming art career. I hope i get to see your gallery one day. From what Amy’s told me, it is quite the talk of the town; a beautiful sight to see. Nonetheless, I write you this letter in an urgent fashion, less than orderly manner; dearest friend, Beth’s health is compromised. Her illness has come back; it has come back tenfold, she is suffering everyday and can hardly get up to have a walk outside. We all weep for her. Y/N, her time is running out. We pray and we pray, and she pulls through, put it may not be enough. I know this is a rash question, and i ask you to think about it before you make a final decision. I am asking you to come stay with us for a while, Y/N. Please. You were always the best at comforting us all. Jo needs you.i hear her call out your name in her sleep; as she thrashes around, completely unable to sleep. She is desperately in need for comfort. Someone who loves her romantically; she needs her - what was her nickname for you?- “Poppy Flower?” Yes, i believe that was it. You had one for her too, right? - “Sunflower”-.I know what happened between you two. Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. I’m pleading you to think rationally, i don’t want to pressure you to do anything. But please, we need you. Jo needs her Poppy Flower. 

             Love, Meg March

Your tears were already dripping down to the paper, making the ink run. You held a hand over your mouth to cover your sobs. Not Beth, not sweet sweet Beth who loved music and loved her sisters and loved going to the beach and loved the sunshine and loved drawing. 

You packed a suitcase with as many clothes as you could fit, and a rucksack to carry on your back with books, money and other stuff you might need. You laid some shoes and clothes out. You were leaving the next morning on a steamboat for the March house in Concord, Massachusetts. 

You quickly wrote down a note for Fernando, leaving it on your door, along with the keys.

August 2nd, 1868

Fernando, Te pido un favor bien grade. Tu esres el encargado de la galeria por las proximas semanas. No te preocupes, los trabajadores tambien te podran ayudar, asi que no estaras solo. Nesecito ir a ver a alguien muy importante - alguien que tiene un sitio muy especial en mi corazon. No te preocupes por tu pago, te lo dejo en este sobre. Se que lo nesecitas para cuidar a tu mama. Mandale mis saludos.

(Fernando, I am asking you a big favor. I am putting you in charge of the art gallery for the next couple of weeks. Don’t worry, the rest of the workers will help you, so you won’t be alone. I need to go see someone very important- someone near and dear to my heart- don’t worry about your pay. I know you need it to take care of your mom. Tell her I said hi.)

You said as you turned off the gas lamp and the moonlight shone through the window. 

You were going to see her again.

You fell asleep with a smile on your face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: waaaaaaaaaaaaay longer than i expected. but enjoy this series! feedback is appreciated and requests are open!

Happy reading!

Love,

Talya

[priorireverte]

Congratulations Emily!

Your application for George Weasley has been accepted. I feel like George is often a character who gets overlooked, or reduced to ‘twin and prankster’. You have definitely not done that, adding so much more to him in a realistic way that a war would. I’m very excited to have him around!

Please look to the checklist for the next steps and reach out if you have any questions!

OUT OF CHARACTER

NAME & PRONOUNS: Emily, She/Her

TIMEZONE: EST

ACTIVITY LEVEL: I am currently searching for a job, but that does leave me with some time on my hands for rping purposes! Trying to keep myself busy in a multitude of ways when the world is not helping y'know </3

ANYTHING ELSE: TW: rape, sexual assault

CHARACTER DETAILS

NAME: George Weasley

BIRTHDATE: April 1, 1978

DEATHDATE:  N/A

GENDER, PRONOUNS, and SEXUALITY:  George identifies as a cis-man and uses he/him pronouns. He is fairly comfortable with these. George is hetero-romantic and asexual, although I would not say this is a term he understands or would use for himself. Whenever his friends would talk about their partners sexually, George would play along with the others, but definitely would look to change the subject as soon as humanly possible. It is simply not something he can comprehend about himself and he does best ignoring feelings that he may not yet understand. The only person he has ever even mildly revealed this to would be Fred, but George was not comfortable going into any major detail in regards to how he felt. At most it was an offhand comment here or there.

BLOOD STATUS: Pureblood

HOUSE ALUMNI: Gryffindor

OCCUPATION: Shop Owner of Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes

FACECLAIM: I think I am going back and forth on this and I am also terrible at these—I believe I was debating between Caleb Landry Jones or Luke Newberry. But I think I finally decided to go with Caleb!

CHARACTER BACKGROUND

POSTBELLUM

They say there are five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. They also say that time heals all wounds. George has found out that hard way that this is all a load of rubbish. What they don’t tell you about losing the most important person in your life is that you never fully stop grieving. You can’t heal. Because healing involves forgetting. A bouquet of flowers from his great aunt was nice, but it’s not going to make George forget and it’s not going to bring Fred back. And George has no idea how to keep plants alive, anyway.

It seems like most others have been able to move on; start families, or careers, but George can’t seem to get past it, and he forces himself to deal with his loss head on every day by working day in and day out at that store that haunts him. He sees Fred in everything; from the letterhead on his desk that still reads “Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes, Proprieters Fred and George Weasley”; to the kids who come in and test the screaming yo-yo’s in front of him; or the mirror in the bathroom that is for employees only. He has buried himself in his work post the war, and quite literally expects to be buried in it.

While George will never fully get over the loss of his twin, he has since stopped having panic attacks in the bathroom and got a haircut, which he considers major progress. It has also helped that he has finally taken Ron up on his offer to help run the shop, which he realized he needed a long time ago, as the bills have piled up from all his discounts. [Happy to redact if Ron’s mun decides they don’t want to follow this plot!] He still snaps at his family more than he would like, but they know how suffocating they can be.

The news of the Returned may have been the happiest anyone had seen George in years. He cracked a joke and even went out of his way to visit his siblings, instead of making them come to him. To Hell with adjusting to his new life, he was ready. It seemed clear to him that those who died valiantly in the Battle of Hogwarts were returning—After all, if people like Professor Lupin and Lavender Brown were coming back, it was only a matter of time until Fred did too, right?

PERSONALITY: What are they good at? What do they struggle with? What are their strengths and weaknesses? 

Boys as loud as their hair, is what George heard Filch say about him and his brother once, and it lit up his face with a wide bright grin before he tapped Fred excitedly on the shoulder to share the good news. It was this unbridled optimism, this impractical belief that he could do anything that gave him the confidence and courage to follow his dreams. That, and having a partner by his side.

George was easy to get along with, because for most of his life his decisions had been made for him and all he had to do was saddle up and play along. Fred was always the one setting the wheels in motion, and George was grateful for that. He wasn’t shy by any means, but people just flocked to Fred, and by association George. They were known to light up any room they were in, and were always the first to enliven a crowd if it was too dreary for their liking. He liked having the same friends as his brother. He liked being a package deal. He knew Fred would always have his back so when he felt like he wanted to retreat, he knew Fred could carry a conversation or sort something in the shop without him.

Perhaps that’s why it’s been so hard for George to adjust to life on his own. Now all of that pressure falls on him and it feels overwhelming. He was never the business-savvy brother, leaving Fred to come up with price points while he worked on ideas for new products.

Now, it feels like half of himself is gone. Sometimes he feels like a body walking around and smiling because that’s what people are supposed to do, but the joy just isn’t there. The smiles are artificial now. He is trying, but few things can bring back that spark that his twin so easily transferred over to him.

BRIEF OVERVIEW OF FAMILY: What was being part of their family like? How did they grow up? What values did their parents/family instill in them?

His parents instilled in him and all his siblings a love and joy greater than most, and George was grateful for that. The Weasley’s weren’t well off by any means, but that only bubbled the creativity in the twins, especially when it came to ways to cure their boredom. He remembers fond birthdays he shared with Fred where they made their own cake scream or spent an entire afternoon perfecting exploding snaps in their bedroom, much to the dismay of their parents. The Burrow was unkempt and chaotic, but George loved it, squeaky floorboards and all.

He hasn’t been back in years, purposefully choosing to close himself off from that space. He knows his mother isn’t happy with his choice and that guilt eats him up inside, but that shrinking feeling in his heart is better than the burning feeling he would get of seeing his brother’s hand on that clock. Still, George loves his family endlessly, even if he hasn’t done a very good job of showing it these last couple of years.

HISTORY: What was their life before the end of the war in ‘98 or before their death? What was important and formative for them?

There was a time when George thought that the worst thing that could happen to him was having to de-gnome the garden after flying a car underage. Then there was a time he thought the worst thing that could happen to him was losing an ear. George and his siblings grew up in a loving, but shabby home. He loved his siblings and knew they loved him, even if he and his twin brother were always pranking them. They were carefree, and they had each other.

Fred was the one who first suggested the two go into business, and George was always the first to agree with his big brother. It felt like a dream, leaving the drudges of school behind and spending all day doing what he loved with the person he cared about most. They never fought. They had been a well-oiled machine since birth, so it only made sense that their business ran smoothly. The one knew where the others’ strengths and weaknesses lied. Fred was better at bargaining and he didn’t care what color the walls were, like George did. Growing up did not seem like growing up, because he had a partner by his side.

George was the one who first brought up going back to Hogwarts. Given their proximity to the Order of the Phoenix and Harry, fighting alongside them was their only option. Additionally, George felt they owed Harry for helping them start their business in the first place. He will always believe that the cause they fought for was noble and right, but he sometimes wonders if the victory was worth the loss. He doesn’t spend much time with folks of his past. George doesn’t want to, but a piece of him resents Harry. He would never tell anyone, but he wonders if they hadn’t gotten so close, felt it was necessary to fight alongside him, if Fred would still be here. He wonders If he wouldn’t fall asleep alone at his desk every night curled into a ball; he wonders if he would ever make a new product instead of staring, detached at the efforts that just remind him of his brother.

OOC EXPLORATION

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? I feel like finding a post-war trio era rp with a unique plot that is also para-based is me asking for too much, and yet here you are!! I have never explored Post-War George and I think his trauma is so fascinating and it could affect his life in so many different ways, as it already has. The addition of the Returned is asking for more ~angst~ and boy am I here for it :) In particular, I am interested in exploring the dynamics George has with his siblings especially, as I am sure some of them have very different reactions to him kind of closing himself off for a bit, and his guilt is obviously through the roof because of it. But also all characters tbh!!! I love for plotting out entirely too much backstory haha.

ANYTHING ELSE?  I made a mood board for George here! https://www.pinterest.com/ebateman64/ch-george-weasley/

And also some head canons!:

George has a hard time sleeping (he always has) but he actually enjoys sleeping in his office. The papers piled high, the Pygmy Puffs that squeak at night–the clutter and chaos actually feel like the most stable thing he has had in a long time. Immediately following the war, George stayed at the Burrow for a few weeks to be closer to his family, using it as an excuse to get any leftover stock that might still be in his childhood bedroom. But it was too troubling to sleep in that room. It was bare-boned, not only because he had taken most of his belongings, but because one of the beds was empty. After the first night, he slept on the couch in the living room instead.

While he barely feels the loss of his left ear these days, occasionally there is a ringing sound that fills his head and gives him migraines from the pain, major enough that he needs to lie down. This only happens occasionally, and he usually chooses to push through it by clasping his hand to his ear for a few minutes.

George actually used to care quite deeply about his appearance, however, that has definitely gone downhill in recent years. Some could say he is going to a “rugged” look, but it’s really just because he can’t be bothered to wash his hair. In the last couple of weeks, however, he has donned the old suit that he used to wear to work everyday. He can’t fill it out like he used to, but it gives him some semblance of hope.

[johnbernsteinx]

First Date | Self-Para (not really)

Just a little throwback thread we did for John and Quinn’s (@quinn-hawthorne) first date. This can be backdated about exactly a year ago. 🤡

trigger warnings: mentions of alcoholism and drug addiction, nervous boys and some kissin’.

A date. It was probably a mistake to do this. Quinn didn’t do this. His last date was -- over seven years ago, and with the only person he’d ever wanted something serious with. It didn’t have to be a thing, and he knew that. Something casual, something just to try and ‘get back out there’ so to speak. Was it pathetic that Quinn’s only real dating history was with Lara? Even when they hadn’t been together in nearly a decade? He was sure it was getting there. But, this, this was good, right? John was good looking, sweet, and he hadn’t refused the date. He could take that as enough. Maybe this would be a one time thing, that was okay. He didn’t expect much out of himself, figuring that John would realize quickly that this was a mistake, that he didn’t want to even speak to Quinn again, and he had to be okay with that. He liked John, though, he’d become a friend over the past few months, niceties turned into light flirting, and now here they were.

Quinn sat across from John, trying to cover up his nerves, or uncertainty. It was just dinner, fuck, that didn’t need to be a big deal. When the waiter came to the table, handing the drink menu to Quinn before starting to go over it, Quinn offered it up to John, an uncomfortable smile crossing his features as he did. “I’ll just have a water, thanks,” he told the waiter once he’d gone over probably too many drinks for Quinn’s own good, suddenly feeling sheepish at having made the poor guy go over the list. “But, please,” he waved a hand toward John, his eyes meeting the other man’s from across the table. “Anything you want. Don’t feel like you can’t.”

__

John wasn’t sure if he could remember the last time he’d felt as nervous as he did that night. After spending an embarrassing amount of time getting ready – more than he’d ever like to admit – he’d finally decided on an outfit and it was then when he allowed himself a moment to process what was even happening. Quinn asking him out had come as a surprise. A welcome one, but a surprise nonetheless. They got along well, John knew that and maybe their friendly banter had turned into something that came close to some teasing but with how long he’d been out of the dating game, John almost felt like he had to relearn the first steps. His last real date had been years ago. There’d been one or two in the meantime but they barely mattered, considering they ended in him never seeing the person in question ever again. Maybe that was just something John had been cursed with – an inability to keep someone interested or maybe he was being too oblivious – the same way he’d been with Quinn up until now.

He hadn’t expected Quinn to be interested in him that way. He hadn’t even considered that he could be and yet, here he was, sitting in a dimly lit restaurant across from the other man, his nerves leaving him a little shaky and unfocused as he reached up to fix his glasses and cleared his throat – a nervous habit he couldn’t quite seem to shake. Quinn had been nothing but nice to him ever since they’d met. Kind and handsome, a little dorky in a way John found endearing but now, he couldn’t help but go over the advances he might’ve missed. The hints and the flirting he registered as Quinn being friendly. It made him feel a little stupid but he was snapped out of his thoughts when a waiter came by, a hint of surprise glimmering in his dark eyes when he accepted the card with a quiet thank you. His order caught him off-guard and maybe he’d imagined the slight discomfort on the other man’s features but he couldn’t help the way his brows pulled together. “Oh! Uh…,” he trailed off, eyes scanning over the menu as his hand lifted to touch his glasses again before he could stop himself and John met Quinn’s eyes momentarily before looking over to the waiter. “For me, too – thank you,” he said politely, waiting for him to walk off before he tilted his head, a curious smile on his lips. “You don’t drink?”

__

It had been a long time that Quinn had started flirting with John before he thought the other man had even picked up on it fully. Nothing crass, just little things. He wondered how much coffee he’d brought John as a means of trying to win his favor without John even realizing just what he was doing. But, it didn’t matter, not really. He had finally gotten some courage to ask, half expecting a no, of course it would have been gentle, kind and sweet. Or maybe John was just too nice to say no outright. Either way, he figured this would wind up being good practice, maybe go on dates with other people when this inevitably went wrong. Especially with John looking just as put together, and handsome as he’d ever seen the other man. He’d tried, dressed up and cleaned up from his normal look, something that he rarely ever broke out, preferring something more comfortable than the jacket and slacks he’d settled on.

What he hadn’t totally expected was the slip and the tell so quickly. He didn’t drink, he was sober, and that wasn’t a fact he was ashamed of. It just didn’t exactly scream first date conversation. But, John didn’t seem bothered by the idea of Quinn not drinking, maybe he thought it was simply that whole ‘clean living’ that vegans or whatever did, not the same clean living he did. “Oh, um,” Quinn’s eyes went wide, paling a little under this sort of attention. “No, I don’t,” he admitted. “I’ve been sober for like seven years now. It’s not a big deal, just a part of my life.” He smiled over to John, waving a dismissive hand to his own words, as if trying to further convince him it was just that. Not a big deal. “Seriously, though, if you want some wine or something, I don’t mind. I’d hate to make you feel like you can’t.” He picked up the menu, his eyes giving it a once over, before glancing back up at John. He was honestly desperate to change the conversation. “Um, so have you been here before? I came once a long time ago, and they have this chicken and artichoke dish that I still think about all the time. I’ve tried to figure out the recipe at home and can’t quite crack it.”

__

It wasn’t often that John felt stupid but the more he thought about it, the more sense Quinn’s visits at the gallery started to make. Granted, he’d been surprised whenever he showed up, bringing him coffee and taking the time out of his day to have a chat with him – which John had written off as a friendly gesture. It was like he needed to be hit over the head with it before he realized, not used to the attention and the idea of someone being even remotely interested in him that way. The concept seemed almost foreign and frankly, quite ridiculous to him. John had never considered himself all that special or desirable for that matter so as much as he wanted to find validation in Quinn taking the first step, he was also sure that if he allowed him to get to know him better, he’d soon realize he could have literally anyone else. He wasn’t good at this after all – at being flirty and charming, let alone impressing someone. John had been so sure he’d stay single forever, the same way he had for the past decade – which sounded worse when he thought about it but it was true after all.

Tonight though, John tried not to focus on his flaws and insecurities but on Quinn and the way he looked like he’d made an effort for him – which had made him smile to himself subtly. It had been unexpected but this didn’t have to be a big deal, right? It was just dinner, he reminded himself. Taking in the other man’s reaction, John’s own eyes widened – had he overstepped? God, he was so out of his comfort zone but he tilted his head casually, listening as his features shifted faintly. There was no hint of judgement though, merely surprise. “Oh! Wow – that’s…,” he trailed off, a smile tugging on his lips, “that’s great, Quinn. Seven years is a long time!” John told him genuinely, not having expected the answer. Quinn was in good shape, so he’d expected it to be a dietary restriction but he figured that it was a good sign that Quinn was honest about it right away, without trying to lie about it. He’d rather know about it than push him to have a drink after all. His lips remained curved into a gentle smile and he simply shook his head. “I don’t mind either! I like wine but I also like water,” John teased, appreciating the offer. “So – we can both just stay sober tonight,” he added with a raised brow before their conversation shifted. John couldn’t deny that he had questions but he’d also picked up on the way Quinn was trying not to dwell, so he wouldn’t. An intrigued expression settled on John’s features as he gave a nod. “Only a few times but it’s been a while for me, too.” He left out the detail that a restaurant like this felt a little intimidating when you went there on your own or merely a friend. “That sounds incredible though,” John mused, a smile washing over him. “I am a terrible cook so I can’t say I could or would ever make it myself but kudos to you for even trying! I’m sure the outcome wasn’t all that terrible though, right?”

__

At John’s reaction, Quinn relaxed a little bit. Something like that wasn’t exactly easy news to hear, or break to someone on a first date. Wasn’t it some sort of red flag or something? But, John was supportive, nice, and it made the tension in his shoulders disappear. They would at least be able to enjoy the rest of their dinner, some of the heavy shit out of the way. “Thanks,” he said, smiling at John, laughing off his own nerves. John was willing to stay sober, to not drink around him and that brought a relief he hadn’t been expecting. “It’s fine, but thank you. For respecting that, even though you don’t have to.” He cleared his throat, before he shifted the discussion. He figured there were plenty of questions, there always were, but he wasn’t ready for that. He’d been honest, given enough tonight. He wanted to focus on the other, on John and getting to know him, not dwell on his own fucking problems.

The question felt empty, low effort and maybe it was, something to just shift the conversation. But, Quinn nodded at their shared lack of frequency to the place. His face twisted in disbelief at the comment, laughing lightly. “You can’t?” The question didn’t come out mockingly, only a curious surprise behind the words. “You seem like someone who can cook, you got that whole important art world vibe. Figured you’re out there making fancy dishes all the time.” Quinn shook his head though. “The first couple batches when I was teaching myself to cook were not great, but they’ve gotten better.” He had finally put his menu back down, his eyes settling on the other man. “Really though, either I’m misremembering the dish or they’ve got some kind of secret ingredient in there I just can’t figure out.”

__

For John, it hadn’t even been a question of whether or not he’d respect this newly discovered piece of information. The idea didn’t put him off, let alone scare him – considering that Quinn had managed to stay sober for that long was a testament to how much he wanted to keep himself out of trouble and John felt like he’d be an asshole if he considered that a deal breaker. If this date was to lead to another or anything other than the way they had been all this time. He wasn’t sure if he had any expectations – not so much because of Quinn but because of himself. The man had no idea how to do this. How to seem alluring and attractive to anyone, really but either way and his nerves aside, this felt like it could just be a nice evening over dinner and a little less small talk. “Of course,” John was quick to assure, clearing his throat almost at the same time as Quinn – which made him laugh softly, his head shaking lightly. They were both nervous, John could tell but the only reason they were was because this felt a little more official. A little more like a hit or miss. “Thank you for telling me,” John replied. “Even though you didn’t have to,” he teased, a half-grin spreading across his lips.

They were warming up to the idea of this being a date, John was sure of it because the conversation felt a lot like testing the waters and yet, he was eager to get to know Quinn more. Granted, they’d been talking for a while, had shared a few bits here and there but never like this. They rarely dug deeper. Another laugh escaped him at how genuinely surprised Quinn seemed and he shook his head repeatedly as he went on. “Oh – god, no. I’m glad I can get away with pretending like I know what I’m doing but I’m really more of a takeout guy. I like a greasy pizza or Chinese,” he admitted, pulling a face. “The only thing I can make are pancakes and eggs. Maybe pasta…if I have some help with the sauce,” he half-joked. “So, no – my culinary experience has nothing on my expertise when it comes to art.” There was a spark of amusement settling in his eyes – a hint of surprise that this was the read Quinn had on him. “Well…,” John said, looking around for a moment before finding the other man’s eyes. “There’s only one way to find out tonight! A new chance if you will and maybe I can even be of help.”

__

There were so many things in Quinn’s past he figured would be a red flag, Hell, maybe some of those things should be. Even the admission of a drinking problem, being sober now was a big one. John was kind, though. He knew there was plenty more to tell, plenty that might turn the other man away. That could wait. If it went poorly tonight, why explain another addiction when he didn’t have to? This one came naturally. The other, that could live in peace and in his past for now. Something he could worry about if this did go anywhere. He met John’s smile, and nodded. “Felt like you deserved to know,” he said, shifting in his seat, trying to hide his discomfort. He leaned forward, his elbows coming to rest on the table gently, looking the other man over once more. An innocent gaze, taking in just how the other looked. Quinn wasn’t used to this kind of effort, it’d been a long time since he’d had to. But, John seemed to be in that state easily. Handsome, soft and comfortable. It made Quinn feel at ease with him normally, a way he didn’t usually feel with the Goldfinch folks.

But, tonight was a different feeling than at the gallery when Quinn stopped in. That was obvious going into this. He wondered if he should have done something a little more casual, a little more easy going for them to start, but this seemed like it would have been more John’s style. A nicer meal, a nicer place. John seemed like he was far from Quinn’s standard Docks comfort. Though, as he spoke, it was almost a relief, easy and something far more sustainable for Quinn if this went anywhere. “Greasy pizza and Chinese takeout are a staple,” he laughed, trying to reassure John that that was completely acceptable. “I’m terrible with pancakes, I really can never get them right. Oh, I’ve got the sauce down, I can follow a recipe pretty well, I got you.” He grinned for a moment, before suddenly feeling a little bold at assuming there would be even a teasing chance there would be a chance of that. But, when John leaned in to offer his help, as if they were sharing a secret, Quinn’s smile only settled further, relaxed and comfortable. “I may need your help, you’re going to have fresh taste on this. I’m sure we can figure it out and give this place a run for their money when we do.”

It was then that the waiter brought their waters, setting them down in front of each of them, as well as setting a small basket of bread between them. Quinn settled back into his chair and gave him a Thanks.

“Are you ready to order?” the waiter asked, and Quinn looked to John, for his approval. “If you are.”

__

While a part of John wanted to know more already, the curiosity being a natural reaction rather than a need to test Quinn, he could tell that this was venturing into something too heavy for a first date. Either way, he appreciated the honesty and was sure that he’d be able to navigate it better now – knowing better than to offer Quinn anything alcoholic or ask him to get drinks if there’d be more dates to come – though he felt like maybe that thought was just him being a little too eager so he filed it back for another time. His features softened at the casual words and yet, they felt genuine. “I appreciate it,” John told him gently, adjusting to Quinn’s wish to move on from it even without him having to voice it. He could feel the other man’s eyes on him and for a moment, John tried not to get self-conscious about it. It had been a while since anyone had taken an interest in him that way but instead of judging him, Quinn seemed to just take him in - observing. His eyes averted for a moment, yet a soft smile remained as he reached up to fix his glasses, clearing his throat before daring to meet Quinn’s eyes once more.

It was interesting to see how their energy shifted – how suddenly all those gestures got a different meaning, how the stolen glances and nervous laughs suddenly made sense. John felt a little silly now, having filed them away as nothing but Quinn being friendly towards him. The place Quinn had chosen for them felt much more official. Like anyone would expect a date but truth be told – John had never cared much about prestige. He liked nice things. Extraordinary things. Expensive things. But he never expected them for himself. He’d been a little surprised at Quinn’s choice but he enjoyed the atmosphere – the dim light and soft background noises. He was also well aware of how people saw him, dressed in more formal attire, some of his clothes sporting the tag of well-known designers, all while standing in front of paintings that sold for horrendous amounts of money but that only made it more fun for John. The man loved the surprised looks he got when he shared his preference for fast food. His love for trash tv and being outdoors. A relieved laugh escaped John in return and he gave a hum in appreciation. “Thank god because they definitely are in my household and always have been,” he admitted with a grin before he tilted his head, prominent brows raising in surprise at the boldness of Quinn’s statement but he liked the confidence – or maybe the reassurance that he hadn’t messed up just yet. “See? I’d say that makes for a good balance.” His lips twitched into a half-smile. “You got the sauce down, I got the pancakes – it’d be a well-divided team effort because I for one am a hopeless case,” he joked, mirroring Quinn’s grin before looking down to where his hands were folded in front of him, resting against the table where he toyed with one of the rings decorating his fingers. It caught him off-guard just how easy it was to allow himself to flirt a little, to tease the other man with each of them playing along. Another laugh escaped and he was quick to nod. “Gladly! I’ll do my very best. Not that I got a very acquired palate but I can give it a try.”

Once their waters arrived, John’s attention shifted momentarily to thank the waiter as well but his eyes were quick to focus back on his date. “I think I am – go right ahead, though I am very curious about that artichoke chicken dish now.”

__

Maybe this had been a long time coming, too long, really. It’d been months since they’d met, started getting to know each other and developing a friendship. It’d been months since Quinn had started flirting, even, but it only seemed like it was a matter of days since he even realized John was receptive, before he was bold enough to ask the other man out. John seemed too good for someone like Quinn, and he felt lucky that the other man gave him the time of day at all. The restaurant had made sense when he’d planned it, something nice, an attempt to step into John’s world a little more, but for as uncomfortable as he’d been, and knowing that John was a little more laidback than he’d expected he suddenly wished they were chatting over a pizza. It seemed like it was easier to talk that way, casual, low pressure. The only reassurance he gave himself was that even if John was more relaxed than this offered, there was no confusion on Quinn’s interest. John deserved a nice dinner, something special, even if this didn’t go anywhere. John’s words following his own, though, an idea that there would be another time even so early on in the evening only pulled his face into a smirk, relieved and interested in that prospect however it came about. “Balance like that is always good to have.”

His eyes wandered down to John’s hands, taking in the rings, and how John fidgeted with them. It was almost comforting to know that John seemed just as nervous as Quinn felt. It didn’t seem to make sense why anyone would be quite so nervous with him, but it made it easier to just be there with no regrets to name. When John ordered, Quinn nodded, giving John another smile. “I’ll have the same.” The waiter confirmed softly, as he took their menus, and walked back to the kitchen.

Quinn’s attention never fully left John, his eyes drifting down to his own hands, to the other tables only momentarily, but John held onto it. “So,” he said, reaching for a piece of bread from the basket. “I don’t know that I’ve ever asked. But, where are you from?” It seemed like a silly question, one Quinn never asked people if he knew they weren’t townies like him. “I mean, you’re not originally from Crescent Harbor, right? A small town like this everyone knows a little about everyone. And I’ll be honest, I don’t know that I know anything other than the bits you’ve already told me.”

__

John knew that he was obvious when it came down to his nerves but one thing he was sure Quinn had already learned was that he wasn’t good at concealing how he felt. He knew he was expressive, his features never quite allowing him to be subtle and even his quirks gave him away. The way he cleared his throat, the way he played with his rings and reached up a little too often to fix his glasses – they were all indicators for how nervous he truly was. He knew he had no reason to, did he? Quinn wasn’t a stranger at this point and he did feel comfortable but maybe the more official part of it all, the less casual way of having a coffee together or chatting within the safety that was the gallery or running into each other at random caused all this to shift a little. Not that John minded – in fact, he was relieved. He’d wondered before, of course he had but he hadn’t expected Quinn to be interested. It was like they lived in different worlds entirely but never in a bad way, they had enough common interests but John knew that depending on what neighborhood you lived in, the town already had a certain picture of you and John barely occupied the docks the same way he assumed Quinn didn’t necessarily wander around Goldfinch much.

Once they’d ordered, John smiled lightly. “Time to find out what the missing ingredient is, hm?” He joked, yet he was entirely serious before his brows raised almost immediately, his focus entirely on Quinn again as he reached for his glass of water, taking a first sip as he listened, chuckling at the rather random yet basic question. “Oh god – now that I think about it, I probably only told you that I moved from Seattle but no, I’m not even from the area. I’m Canadian. I was born and raised in Toronto,” he shared, shaking his head. “If I’ve learned one thing so far having lived here for the past few years, it’s that you learn to spot newbies quickly,” John added with a chuckle. “You’re bound to keep running into each other if you’re actually located here, I think. At least that’s what keeps happening to me and well – kept happening to us, no?” His head tilted slightly, lips curving in slight amusement. “I’d be happy to change that though. What else would you like to know? I’m an open book,” he said, opening his palms as if to make a point, leaning back in his seat a little.

__

Quinn sometimes felt out of his depth with John, maybe he’d made the man too complex in his mind, but with the confirmation that John had not only lived in Seattle, but was from somewhere else entirely seemed almost intimidating. “Wow,” the word fell from his mouth on instinct. “And you settled on here?” he asked, more teasing than anything. “I remember going into Seattle when I was younger and just thinking that was where I wanted to go.” He smiled. “Wild to think a guy used to big cities would want to be here of all places.” Quinn took a sip of his own water, pondering over John’s own teasing question, kept happening to us, no? Quinn desperately tried to hide the laugh that bubbled in his chest, and the way he suddenly felt restless in his seat. “Oh, yeah. Running into each other so much, you’d think one of us was into the other. Unavoidable hazard of a small town, what can I say?” he teased back.

Quinn bit into the bread, and thought over his questions as he chewed, easing back into his chair a bit. “What did draw you here? I mean, I know I don’t know a whole lot about art, but I can’t imagine the scene here is exactly something to jump at compared to the city.” He didn’t tack on that he was glad it had brought the other man here, that they’d met and he could have some kind of casual flirt, a date, and wherever it ended up leading to, with someone who didn’t know him before, someone who had a cleaner image of him than anyone else in town. “Though, I’m sure the gallery is looking better now that someone who’s seen more of the art scene other places is running it.”

__

While John barely aligned with the image of him that seemed to live in Quinn’s mind, he was happy to share more about himself and shape it to something that felt a little more authentic instead. He knew what kind of impression he left, what he came across as but John truly wasn’t as stuck up and pretentious as his occupation and overall demeanor made it seem. Quinn’s reaction made him laugh – he could tell it was genuine but he was quick to nod. “I did! And have done so for the past…,” he pondered, pulling his lower lip between his teeth as he squinted, “six years? So it’s safe to say it was a rather final choice,” the man added, humming in understanding. He could see the appeal and maybe he looked at it from a different perspective considering that big cities were all he’d known before. “I like it,” John admitted with an almost shy smile. “Don’t get me wrong, I loved traveling before I settled here but…so far I like living smaller if you will,” he explained. “The anonymity can have its perks but it never quite felt like home.” At his teasing, John let out another small laugh, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he looked back at Quinn, finally allowing himself to let his eyes linger for a moment as well. “Well, luckily one of us had the guts to finally step it up,” he joked in return, tilting his head. “In case you haven’t been able to figure that out yet, I’m not all that good with picking up on these things. I blame everyone around here being too friendly towards me.”

The amused smile remained on John’s lips and he reached for a piece of bread himself, his appetite suddenly making itself known but he’d been too lost in their conversation to realize until now. “That was exactly what drew me to Crescent,” he admitted. “Not that I ever planned on staying for as long as I had – I knew I wanted to live in a small town at some point and I came here for a trip on a weekend and fell in love with it. I learned that they had a position opening up for curation at the gallery and well…I gave myself a year but sometimes life just takes a turn that way,” he explained with a subtle shrug. “I worked in bigger galleries than this – not that that’s hard to do,” he chuckled, shaking his head before he continued, “but it had a certain charm to it, one I haven’t seen before. The art world can be…,” he trailed off, sighing as he tried to find a word, a brow raising before he leaned in slightly. “It can be a little pretentious sometimes. A little fake even and this felt more sincere to me. A gallery displaying art made by and for locals,” he concluded before his eyes averted bashfully at the compliment, his head tilting slightly. “Thank you. I’d hope so…otherwise I’d be very bad at my job,” he teased, taking another sip of water before clearing his throat. “What about you though? I know you’ve lived here for all your life, right? What made you stay?” He asked, popping a piece of bread into his mouth as dark eyes focused back on Quinn’s features.

__

His own gaze was filled with interest and amusement. Quinn knew that his time here was colored differently than someone like John. He didn’t hate Crescent Harbor, it had everything he needed, but there was plenty that he wanted to distance himself from, and he didn’t see what exactly drew anyone into the town. But, hearing John’s reasoning, he supposed he could understand it. Living smaller. Wasn’t that what Quinn had been doing in recent years? Simply trying not to be a burden anymore. “Smaller living, I get that.” He agreed with a nod. He listened as John spoke, genuinely interested and curious about not only what ended up bringing him here, but the small bits of his past that flitted in. He liked what John had to say, liked his reasons even if there were pieces of him that didn’t understand entirely. It made sense, to some degree, a sincerity to the town that certainly lived there, but that sincerity that Quinn himself knew hadn’t ever been a friend to him. He didn’t hold it against John, though, it was a new place to him, but the gentle insult to the pretentious and fakeness of bigger cities in John’s world at least help him understand a little more. “No, of course. It always looks great in there. You clearly know what you’re doing.”

The question to Quinn, though, was more complex, too heavy to answer naturally. He took another piece of bread, tearing a piece off and popping it into his mouth as he tried to find a simple way to say it. “I have,” he answered, swallowing the bite. “It just never worked out,” he said vaguely. “We stuck around when my son was born to get some help because me and my ex were just kids ourselves. But, she never left, and I can’t imagine leaving while he’s still growing up.” He gave John a soft smile. Talking about these things with John, on a date especially, felt strange. Mentioning Mason, Lara, all of it. He left the heavier shit, left out the mention of being broke, struggling with everything he had. John had pieces of his past that he was sure could grant a little insight. That seemed like enough. “Plus, at this point, I’m in my 30s and never really went anywhere. It’s hard to see myself not here. I think it’s just where I’m supposed to be. If that makes sense.”

__

It felt good – diving into the details a little more now that the two of them had the chance to. John had known Quinn for a few months now but right now it felt like they’d barely known each other at all. They’d kept their conversations light and casual, flirty, now that John reflected back but he’d never minded it. If anything, that was the point of exploring this, right? To get a feel for one another. For whether or not this one date would lead to another or even several more – not that John would get ahead of himself like that just yet. He smiled, nodding. It was a strange concept to think that while those who’d been born and raised here wanted to leave, yet he’d actively chosen to stay later on in his life. Granted, Quinn couldn’t know all the things that had led up to this moment and John wasn’t sure if it was the kind of thing to share over dinner. Yet, he was sharing more than he had without feeling like Quinn was judging him at all, if anything he was listening to him – showing genuine interest – and that alone was enough to reassure the man. “Thank you,” John repeated sincerely, a smile splaying across the curve of his lips.

As he mirrored the question back to him, John could sense the slight hesitation, nodding softly as the other man spoke. His son. How could he have forgotten about that? It was still a foreign concept to him – being a father. Having that kind of responsibility and it was then when he realized he’d never asked further. All Quinn had shared was that he had a son, hinting at the fact that his mother and him were no longer together so he nodded. “That makes perfect sense. I imagine it to be much harder to move when you want to be close to your child – that’s a good thing though, not everyone sticks around,” he said and maybe that was his own biography speaking but he let out a gentle breath instead, looking back at Quinn. “How old is your son now?” He asked curiously, his tone non-judgmental as he took another bite of his bread and another sip of his water. He didn’t mind the topic, let alone the fact that the other man had a kid. It wasn’t a dealbreaker to him – if this was to get any more serious that was. Chuckling, John shook his head. “I mean, I moved to Washington when I was just about thirty so…,” he joked, a teasing grin on his lips. “It’s never too late for new beginnings in my book but I do think that makes sense. I probably would’ve moved back to Toronto myself had I not gotten so attached.” It was then when their food arrived, interrupting their conversation briefly but John’s attention stayed focused on Quinn, merely straying to thank the waiter and shift in his seat. “But – here we are,” John added finally, a content smile gracing his lips.

__

Quinn felt a small pang at John’s words. The mention that not everyone stuck around was not meant to be pointed, maybe something personal but not at Quinn. It wasn’t the time to bring up all the bad, that was something they’d deal with down the road if that was where this went. “I do my best. I want to make sure he’s got a good support system.” He took a sip of his water, and slightly paled at the question as he thought about it. “He’s fifteen, just turned this past September. Starting high school and everything. Which makes me feel old as Hell,” he said with a laugh. Mason was a piece he never felt a hint of shame on, his only regrets surrounding it were in regards to himself. He was proud of Mason, even if he hadn’t played as positive of a role until the past few years. “He’s a good kid. Way better than I was at his age.” He was relieved once more, though, that John didn’t seem judgmental. He knew that he’d mentioned Mason in passing, but it was hardly an unusual thing if Mason had been younger, but having a kid when you weren’t even out of high school wasn’t exactly a shining badge to wear.

Their food arriving was a welcome interruption. He didn’t exactly think about leaving often anymore, more accepting the permanent stay in Crescent Harbor. It was fine, he’d accepted it plenty of years ago. But, John was kind, as always, giving him a level of support on something that barely ever crossed his mind anymore. He thanked the waiter, before his gaze moved back to John, meeting his smile. “Here we are,” he echoed. “And now you’re roped into helping me steal their recipe. I hope you’re ready for this important job,” he said, his tone teasing and soft. It was easy, their meal and their conversations stayed comfortable, that initial nervousness had practically disappeared by the time their food was in front of them. Whatever this was leading to, Quinn wanted that. He liked John. It didn’t have to be serious, but looking over at John, he wanted something. John had humored him along the way, and was sweet and understanding every step of it.

By the time they were finished, Quinn still wasn’t exactly sure what this all would end up amounting to. The waiter swung by with the bill, Quinn was quick to slip his card in and hand it back, his face still grinning across the table at the other man, making polite chit chat as he waited for the waiter to return, this time, signing the receipt and leaving his tip. He peered over at John, once more, not exactly wanting to end the night yet. Only giving himself a reassurance that they would likely do this again. “Are you ready?” he asked. “I don’t want to take up your whole night,” he said, smiling.

__

“If it makes you feel old, then what does that make me?” John teased, his words never anything but teasing as he grinned and his features softened. “I’m glad to hear that. And I’m sure it wasn’t easy raising a child being so young but I think it says a lot about you that you stayed – you must be so proud,” he said, eager to talk about this as casually as they could. He didn’t want this to be weird or too personal but his words were genuine. John was sure that now wasn’t the time to share more about his own experience but he was convinced Quinn was a good man. He had to be if he never left the town despite wanting to in order to be closer to his kid.

A laugh escaped and John covered his mouth subtly, as if they were sharing a secret once again. “Does this count as a crime if it’s for personal use only? Because this smells delicious and if you’re as good in the kitchen as you claim to be, I’ll be even happier to help if it means I get to eat this again,” he teased, only half-joking now that he was feeling a little bolder about his flirting. This felt good and easy enough – maybe John wasn’t as rusty as he’d thought he’d be or maybe the person he was on a date with being Quinn made it that much easier. It felt familiar enough and their gentle teasing and joking around caused every ounce of tension to fade.

As the evening carried on though, John was starting to feel restless all over again. He didn’t want it to end, let alone did he want this the last time they did this. He wasn’t sure what it was about Quinn but there was something and a part of him felt ready to allow himself to explore it. After having been single for years, John had come to peace with this just not being in the books for him but with Quinn being ever so charming and funny and kind towards him, that thought seemed to melt away. A part of him wanted to complain about him paying for him but he accepted it in the end, watching Quinn do so as if it was the most natural thing in the world but John didn’t take it for granted. Looking him over, John couldn’t help but laugh softly at the way they both couldn’t quite seem to get themselves to get up and get moving – as If neither of them wanted to let that night end just yet. “I am, thank you,” he told him before snorting and giving a fond roll of his eyes. “You say that like I’m ready to bail when really, this has been the most fun I’ve had in a long time. I’m having a great time, Quinn. You’re not taking up my night at all.” With that, John pushed his chair back though, letting out a breath as he got up hesitatingly.

__

“I’m having a great time too,” he said, a relaxed smile resting comfortably on Quinn’s face. Quinn followed John’s movement, pushing his chair out, and getting up. He didn’t want to end dinner, didn’t want to end their night. It felt too bold to ask him back to his place, didn’t want to push or assume. It was certainly something he wanted to do again, and extending the night to either of their places could come along with that. He’d never really dated, Lara was the only one he’d had anything serious with, or even a formal date with, and that had been years ago. But, it felt easy with John, a comfort from their budding friendship before all of this. Still, he wasn’t sure what the next moves were. He just tried to read the other man, tried to figure out just what was appropriate to ask. He sidled up next to John as they made their way out. His hand slipped into John’s, a gentle touch as they walked together.

As soon as they were out, back to John’s car, Quinn finally dropped the other man’s hand. Even for the short time, the loss of John’s hand felt weighty. He made his way to the other side of the car, and slid into the passenger seat. “I had a really great time tonight,” he said, his eyes looking over to John. “I know you said I’m not taking up your time, but I still stand by it. I’d still be up for something else, but I don’t want you to get sick of me just in one night,” he joked. “I’m hoping we can do this again, you know?”

__

The confirmation caused a grin to break out on John’s features. It should’ve been ridiculous because he could tell they were getting along and enjoying each other’s company and yet, he had the audacity to question it up until Quinn’s reassurance. Yet, it was then when John started to feel a little lost. Was this the end of their date already? He didn’t want it to be if he was honest to himself but he also wasn’t sure what the next step could be. He felt drawn to Quinn, his eyes constantly on him and as unfamiliar of a feeling as that was by now, after years of not really taking interest in anyone that way, John felt almost a little overwhelmed. John had never been the type to date around or sleep around for that matter. He’d made his fair share of experiences but if those had made him realize one thing, it was that sometimes you should trust your gut and with Quinn, there was nothing that alarmed him. Quite the opposite – he found it hard not to hope for more, yet he tried not to just yet. A gentle smile tugged on his lips when Quinn was bold enough to step into his personal space – not in a way that felt overwhelming but welcome and when his hand sought out his, John was surprised at the sudden touch but let his own fingers interlace with Quinn’s for a moment. They could unpack that later – he was sure of it. Right now, John merely let himself enjoy the connection, the way it made his heart beat a little faster and made his skin warm up.

John almost immediately missed the touch he’d not known for what must’ve been years and a part of him wanted to reach out again, keep them connected but he didn’t want to make this weird or overwhelming for either of them so he merely smiled back at Quinn and slipped into his car wordlessly. “I did, too,” he told Quinn genuinely, his eyes finding Quinn’s in the dim light of the parking lot illuminating the inside of his car. A genuine laugh escaped him and he shook his head. “I don’t think that’s possible…,” he said softly before falling silent for a moment. “Thank you,” John added. “For taking me out tonight and treating me to a nice dinner,” he told him. “I haven’t been on a date in quite some time and to say I was nervous would be an understatement but – you made it very easy to enjoy myself. Truth be told, I don’t really want it to end just yet so I also stand by the fact that you’re not taking up my time at all. I have no other plans tonight for a change so…,” he joked, trailing off with a grin. “I’m usually very busy watching TV at this hour but I’m open for suggestions.” With that, John started the engine but his eyes wandered back to Quinn for another moment. “I’d love to do this again, too, though. Whenever you’d like.”

__

Everything John said took away the tension that had come to reside in Quinn’s shoulders. The uncertainty if he’d misread the situation or had been alone in enjoying himself. It had just been dinner, it shouldn't have pulled him like this, made him want more so quickly. Yet, he did. He could suggest going and grabbing a coffee, going for a walk, something but his mind was suddenly blank, staring at the other man, engrossed in him. His face met John’s smile, and he shook his head. “It’s been a long time for me,” he admitted. “You definitely made it easy to shake the dust off.” He laughed lightly along with the man. TV was usually where he found himself as well, but compared to John’s company it lost its appeal.

The engine came to life, the warm glow of the street lights outside trading for the cool of the lights inside the car. His eyes met John’s once more, the confirmation of doing this again echoed in his ear for a long moment. A smile creeping over his features, before his eyes trailed down absently, landing on the other man’s lips. It was without any other hesitation that he was leaning in, pressing his lips to John’s. His hand coming to rest against the other man’s jaw to draw him in. Nothing urgent or rough. And over far too quickly. He pulled away, his eyes flirting open to meet John’s once more, taking in the warmth of his dark brown eyes. He wanted more, wanting to chase that as much as he could, but he held himself in place, smiling to John. His hand never left its home on the other man’s skin, simply slipping down against the warmth of his neck to rest his fingers gently. “I hope that was okay,” he said, a laugh framing his words.

__

The reassurance was all they’d needed for the last bit of uncertainty to fade away and John, for the first time in years, felt ready to let this happen. Quinn wasn’t a stranger after all. He’d proven to him that he was genuine – otherwise he wouldn’t have spent months talking to him, right? Again, John didn’t want to keep his hopes up but Quinn made it easy to forget the times in the past that had burned him and when he looked back at him, his eyes meeting a pair of warm blues, John couldn’t help but feel like he should lean in. Like there was some tension between them that was far off from the nervousness they’d radiated earlier that night. It had been just dinner but John already wanted to see Quinn again, even with him still right there in front of him. He chuckled softly, shaking his head. “That makes two of us then,” he said, the words once again calming him – they were in this together now.

The silence that settled for a moment didn’t feel awkward in the slightest but John didn’t miss the way Quinn’s eyes dropped and for a moment he wondered if he was making this up – if it was wishful thinking that he’d fixed on his lips for a little too long but suddenly, the other man was leaning in, his face right there and breath warm on his skin and John allowed himself to melt into it, meeting him for a chaste, gentle kiss – merely a press of lips and a tender brush of Quinn’s calloused fingertips against his jaw. John let out a shaky breath in surprise, his own eyes meeting Quinn’s as he let out a small chuckle. The touch against the side of his neck made his skin prickle and hairs rise as he held his glance and it was his turn to let his eyes linger on Quinn’s lips as he spoke, a laugh of his own escaping. “That was – yeah, god – no, that was completely okay,” he breathed and couldn’t help the broad grin that spread. “It was fine, actually,” John teased, meeting Quinn’s glance again as he bit his lip, pondering if it was okay to want more so soon already but he let himself take the leap and closed the distance once more, keeping their kiss light once again before he pulled away with a soft hum. “Definitely okay,” he laughed. “So – where to?”

__

When John met him for another kiss, Quinn didn’t want that one to end. It was light, and soft, something chaste and sweet just as it seemed like it should be so soon. Still, pulling away felt difficult. The touch and the affection felt foreign to him after going so long without, but it was welcome, and with John, it just left him wanting more. He could have pulled John in deeper, held him to the kiss for longer, and he wanted to, but it was too soon for that, wasn’t it? He let his hand drop from John’s neck, falling back to his side. He pulled away, the hum that escaped John left him reeling a little, his mind suddenly wandering over the noise. It only left him wanting more, wanting to hear more of that. He bit his lip, gentle and let it slip back out from his teeth with ease. He cleared his throat, an attempt at clearing his mind from where it had trailed off to.

At John’s question, Quinn hardly hesitated before responding. “We can go back to my place,” the words slipped out, sounding as casual as Quinn could muster. “I mean, for like coffee and maybe watch some TV,” he said, a gentle laugh floating the words. “If that’s what we’d be doing anyway, you know?” He didn’t want to overstep a boundary, didn’t want to overwhelm them both. He wasn’t exactly a casual hookup kind of guy, and he didn’t get that impression from John either. They were both grown men, they both knew where this could lead if John agreed, what Quinn tried not to imply. Nothing had to happen, it could stay innocent and they could just do exactly what Quinn had suggested if they really wanted to. His eyes didn’t stray from John’s though, even as he settled back into the seat, his head leaning back slightly against the headrest. “Or wherever you want, really. I’m good with anything.”

__

A part of John had wanted to linger, too – there was no denying that. There was no point in lying to himself and pretending like he didn’t want to deepen the kiss either, to keep Quinn close and see where it’d take them but he was thankful for the way Quinn seemed to understand. It was new for both of them – not entirely but John didn’t want to put too much pressure on them either. This didn’t have to be more or let alone physical. John enjoyed their conversations and now, as he’d discovered, he also enjoyed kissing Quinn. His brows raised almost immediately at Quinn’s suggestion but the smile that spread across his lips was amused, not at all put off by the idea. “Coffee and TV sound good – if you don’t mind me occupying more of your night,” John added, always checking in for their consent, trying to keep them on the same page even though Quinn had suggested it.

“I mean, that’d make sense, right? I’d literally just go home and do just that after dropping you off,” he admitted with a grin. John wasn’t naïve. Oblivious, yes but he’d picked up on their chemistry and the tension that was still building between them. Their kisses had left him wanting more and maybe, just maybe, he was hoping for it to turn into more kisses – ones that lasted longer than the pecks they’d shared and maybe they’d allow themselves to let them grow deeper but before John could drift too far, he snapped himself out of it. He let out a deep breath – an attempt to ground himself. Was this a good idea? John had no idea just yet but it felt right, so why not go for it? With that last reassuring thought, John chuckled and started pulling out of the parking lot, looking over at Quinn briefly. “You’ll have to navigate me,” he declared, once again confirming that going home with Quinn was more than good with him.

__

“Not at all,” Quinn confirmed. “I’m more than okay with you occupying my night.” It wasn’t needed, but Quinn appreciated the check in. As John rambled on, Quinn just nodded, doing his best to hide the teasing grin that threatened to take over his face. “Right,” he agreed. “It just makes the most sense. Neither one of us wants to go home and just watch TV alone, might as well just hang out together.” That was all that had to happen, Quinn assured himself. He wanted more, sure. The kisses they’d already shared were just enough to leave him wanting to turn that into more. It didn’t have to turn into an entire night, only going as far as they decided. Still, he wanted those soft, quick kisses to go deeper, longer, let them take over his brain for however long they could. Maybe if this was someone else, someone he had just met he would have been okay ending the night here, being dropped off and waiting to see them again before anything more. But, his interest in John had been lasting for months, and now with a successful dinner, and the seal broken on affection, he didn’t want to let the night end just like that.

John pulled out of the parking lot, and Quinn felt the tension build all over again, of what would come. He gave John directions, telling him where to turn, and when. Their conversation nearly dropped to zero as the two focused on the roads. The short drive in the small town felt too long. “Okay, the next driveway on your right is my place,” he said, pointing it out ahead of time for John to slow and pull in. As soon as they parked, Quinn looked over at John with a frown. “Make sure to lock your car. I know we’ll just be inside. But, I know it’s not really the best neighborhood.” Quinn let himself out of the car, pulling his keys out of his pocket. He waited for John to come around his side of the car, before heading up to the front door, and unlocking it. He switched on the light, and stepped inside, moving to let John in. “It’s not much, but please, make yourself comfortable.” He felt a little self conscious over the place. It wasn’t dirty, or messy, just the cheap thrifted furniture mismatched with the things he’d made himself set up around the place. Nothing seemed to match, not the TV stand he’d built to the cheap plaid couch that sat across from it in the living room. Not John and the rest of the room. “I’ll, um, put on a pot.”

__

John knew he didn’t have to ask Quinn again or make sure he was really okay with it – the kisses and invitation should’ve been more than enough confirmation but he couldn’t help it. A part of him still thought this was surreal, too good to be true because while John wasn’t someone for one night only types of things either, whether that was a date or something more, it felt safer with Quinn – he knew him and his interest felt more genuine. He wanted to continue seeing him after all, right? He grinned back at the other man when he reasoned their decision and nodded. “Exactly.” John didn’t expect anything to come out of this – he didn’t expect more but that didn’t mean he wasn’t hoping for it. Kissing Quinn had felt good already, sharing the gentle press of their lips together but he was itching for more, he could try to deny but the truth was that it had been a long time coming, whether he was just now realizing it or not.

They were silent, safe for the way Quinn navigated him to his home and once John parked the car, he looked over at the other man, giving a gentle nod. He was well aware of the reputation the neighborhood had but that didn’t taint the way he saw Quinn. “Got it,” he told him with a reassuring glance and got out as well, locking the car like the other man had advised him to before following him inside. It was then when the nerves seemed to set back in and the man let out a breath before looking around. John was quick to shake his head at the comment. “It’s your place,” he said. “So thank you for inviting me in,” he added. The place was tidy but it made John smile because it was almost like he’d imagined it to be. A little scattered. A little mismatched – he picked up on the fact that Quinn didn’t care much about the things he did like design or what color went with what if the plaid couch was any indication but John didn’t judge and his focus wasn’t so much on the interior anyways but his eyes followed the other man. “Yeah – okay,” he breathed. “Thank you,” John said again, shrugging off his coat before putting it away and without thinking twice about it, he followed Quinn – not wanting to be too far apart.

__

Quinn turned the corner into the kitchen, digging into cabinets for the coffee grounds. He was aware of John, almost too aware that the other man was staying close. Something he wanted, something that he was thrilled at the prospect of. He didn’t want coffee, not really, not now. He wanted to just sit with John, kiss him and embrace what this visit really was. He grabbed a coffee filter, and put it into the maker, scooping grounds into it. What did you say to someone you brought home when you weren’t trying to make it seem like you were interested only in a casual hookup, a one night thing? This was all new to Quinn, it was new to John too, and based on either of their shared quiet, neither of them was exactly sure. Because that wasn’t at all what he wanted. He filled the machine with water, finally leaving it so it could do the rest. He finally turned to John, a goofy smile taking over his face as he took the other man in. “Hi,” he said, the word feeling dumb as it slipped from his lips. “It’ll, um, it’ll be a few minutes. Old machine, takes a while.” Each word he spoke was punctuated by a step toward John, slow and encroaching into his space.

“So, we could, you know, find something to watch, or-” he cut himself off. His gaze trailed back to John’s lips, something he didn’t even try to hide. He didn’t know why he was pretending, really. He didn’t give John a chance to agree, or lead the two of them over to the couch. He leaned in, capturing John’s lips with his own. This kiss was something else from the last ones before they’d arrived. It wasn’t urgent or desperate, though both things were becoming more true of Quinn as they stood there. It was still soft, but one he didn’t pull away from, longer, only becoming deeper. His hand came back up, this time coming to rest comfortably in the crook of his neck, his fingers slipping into John’s hair, and letting the kiss last as long as he could. When he finally pulled away, he only did so far enough for his half-lidded eyes to meet John’s, staying close enough to feel the warmth of John’s breath land against his skin. “Or we can do that,” he breathed out, his lopsided grin ever present. “Whichever you’d prefer.”

__

John felt a little awkward – unable to help but also unable to occupy himself and how could he when his mind was already drifting. Instead, he watched Quinn, allowed himself a moment to see the other man in a different light. He’d always thought that he was attractive but maybe he’d stopped himself from unpacking just how attractive he thought he was. But now that he knew there was more to their friendship, despite not quite able to put a name on it, he let out a deep, inaudible breath, his mind racing with both the pros and cons of doing this. They were both grown adults – there was nothing stopping them from indulging in the newly found connection and yet, John was nervous. Nervous to find out what it’d do to the friendship they’d built. Nervous to find out what they’d miss out on if they didn’t explore further. He didn’t want this to seem like he’d had any ulterior motives agreeing to going home with Quinn – that hadn’t been the case. He’d felt drawn to him and wasn’t ready to stop spending time with him, that wasn’t a crime, was it? It was new and overwhelming – not something John had ever done or done a lot at least. He’d never been one to enjoy random hookups. Instead, he always sought out some kind of connection – one he definitely had with Quinn. A soft laugh escaped him when Quinn caught on to the way he’d been staying close, his eyes lingering. “Hey,” he breathed, shaking his head. “That’s okay,” he added, the breath knocking out of his lungs now that Quinn was in his space again – a tall, broad yet gentle presence and John wanted to reach out. He wanted to welcome him into that newly claimed space.

His brows raised with intrigue when suddenly Quinn’s eyes trailed down again and a knowing smile tugged on John’s lips. It was obvious that they both wanted this and John had a feeling that Quinn was holding back for the same reasons he was. A surprised gasp escaped when Quinn did in fact retain some of his boldness, kissing him again and this time, it wasn’t as chaste as their first or even their second one had been. Yet, John welcomed it and kissed him back almost immediately. His lips brushing against Quinn’s in a way that felt almost like he was testing it out, seeing how much deeper he could let this grow and for a moment, it was John’s turn to get bolder now. He parted his lips against Quinn’s lightly, sucking against his lower one as his eyes fluttered fully shut and there it was again, the gentle touch of Quinn’s hand against the side of his neck and his fingers sliding into his hair. A part of John screamed at him to stop, to not let this get further and yet, another part, the one that felt like taking a risk screamed to ignore it and to indulge for once after having denied him for so long. When they parted, John felt breathless, his own eyes heavy-lidded and dazed, his breath coming out hot against Quinn’s lips as he chuckled, his own hand coming up to cup Quinn’s jaw tenderly, his thumb brushing against his stubbly cheek before he leaned in for another quick kiss, hoping that’d answer his question. “I’m good with that if you are,” he whispered, searching for Quinn’s glance once again. “I mean…you said coffee will take a while, right?”

__

That was all it took. John’s matched boldness, sucking his bottom lip in, it was a confirmation that this was more than fine, more than accepted. But, when John followed Quinn’s offer with a kiss of his own in the space between, Quinn was ready to get a little more lost in it, happy to forget the pot of coffee he’d started. He didn’t say anything else, just dove back in, capturing John’s lips with his once more. The testing waters had been passed on this, his own lips parting against John’s, his tongue running against John’s lip, asking to be granted access. Finally deepening the kiss as soon as he could. His free hand came to rest on John’s hip, and pulled him gently, until they were pressed flush against each other. A contented hum was the first sound that escaped him other than breaths in what felt like hours, but had only been moments.

The only conscious thought that streamed through Quinn’s mind was a mental navigation of the small house. He started walking them back out from the kitchen, breaking the kiss once to find the couch, sitting down once in reach. There wasn’t a question posed this time, simply tugging the dark haired man back to him, only to wrap up into each other once more. His hands found their place once more, one trailing from his hip to move up his back. He trailed his lips from John’s moving along his jaw, and down to his neck, replacing the hand that had been resting there, as he focused his attention on the warm patch of skin. His efforts turning from kisses to sucking at his neck, never long enough in one place or bearing teeth to leave marks, just new brief boldness before he moved back, capturing John’s lips once more with his, this time full of hunger and urgency.

__

John was surprised at how easily he’d allowed himself to dive into this head first. How he was beyond holding back so quickly. Maybe it was the way Quinn made it seem so easy and so very welcome – maybe it was the residue of the tension that had built up over time. But now, with both of them close and eager to continue whatever this was and whatever it’d end up being, John couldn’t seem to care about the consequences. Not when Quinn seemed to take over in his mind, the softness of his lips and the gentle brushes clouding it and dissolving the nagging doubts, his insecurities and the only thing that mattered was getting more of Quinn’s touches. Of his kisses. Of his attention. A low hum vibrated in his chest when Quinn deepened the kiss even further now that John had given him the okay – the animation enough for him to get more daring and John was happy to go along with it, his own lips parting to meet Quinn’s tongue with his own as their kiss turned into something a lot less innocent. It was like they were running on autopilot now – the kisses and touches new and exciting, yet also weirdly familiar to John. Quinn felt safe that way and it was then when he gave in fully, a soft gasp escaping against Quinn’s lips when he pulled him closer, close enough to let their bodies align with ease. The low hum made John smile into the kiss and it made him feel confident enough in what he was doing to Quinn to let his own arms wrap around his middle, hands splaying against his back to keep him flush against him.

When Quinn started to relocate them, John went along with it right away. Walking with Quinn as they stayed connected and allowing the other man to take the lead. They didn’t talk – they didn’t have to. Their bodies did it for them as they barely left any space between them, only parting so they could get situated. When Quinn settled, John followed by letting him pull him into his lap. Breaking away with a soft gasp, John’s eyes flickered open to look down and into those stormy blues he’d been lingering on all night. It was then when he knew, deep down, that this was the last chance to back out. Mainly because he knew that he was already a goner – had already allowed himself to dive in too deep and there was no way he was going to want to stop. Quinn felt good against him, the warmth he radiated comfortable and safe and their bodies seemed to fit alongside one another almost perfectly, the slight height difference enough to give Quinn easy access to his neck and god – if John hadn’t been in trouble before, he most definitely was now. John hadn’t been touched like this in what felt like forever and the way Quinn kissed him felt both eager, yet tender – like he did care about him beneath the hunger and that alone put John’s mind at ease all over again. One of his own hands had found its way into Quinn’s hair, the other splayed against his shoulders when he let his head tip to the side with a content sigh. How Quinn had figured out just where to kiss and where to touch him so easily? John could worry about that later on but right now, he could feel his skin heat up and his body arch into Quinn’s. The gentle suction against his neck making him cling at Quinn’s shirt before he let their lips meet again in a kiss that allowed John to fall into this newly found pleasure, his body melting into Quinn’s as he finally let himself indulge in whatever this meant for them – it didn’t matter now, not when it felt like he was right where he was supposed to be that night.  

[orbit-intl]

210129 KStyle Vol. 1 ― ORβIT, the 7 members are finally together. “The short time we can be together... We are enjoying it with lots of laughs.”

Vol. 1 ― ORβIT, the 7 members are finally together. “The short time we can be together... We are enjoying it with lots of laughs.”

ORβIT is a Japanese-Korean group composed of 7 unique members. They released their long-awaited debut album in November last year, to which many fans responded with enthusiastic support. 

It has almost been a year since ORβIT was formed and announced on February 9, 2020. We asked them about the steps that led to the decision of forming the group and about the reason for their career choices as an artist.

ENG TRANSLATION BY ORBIT_INTL  Source: KStyle News DO NOT RE-USE, REUPLOAD OR RE-TRANSLATE WITHOUT PERMISSION 

― The 7 of you are finally together for the first time in a long time, but how are you spending your time together? 

HEECHO: We spend our private time just relaxing together. Watching movies late at night, having deep talks. 

YOUNGHOON: We watched the movie “Midnight Runners”, it was interesting. We watch movies where we need to hold in our laughter.

YOONDONG: We watch Netflix together, but just simply being together is fun.

HEECHO: It’s been a long time since we’ve spent time together, so we try to have a fun time together. We can’t be together for a long time, so we are enjoying it with lots of laughs. 

TOMO: We made grilled chicken skewers with a special grill for it. Heecheon-san and I were the ones in charge of the grill (laughs). Other than that, Jun and I read manga often. 

JUNE: As for “Jujutsu Kaisen” and “Demon Slayer”, we even went to watch the movie and cried together. I also liked “Chainsaw Man”, which Tomo introduced me to. 

TOMO: I like the “Weekly Shonen Jump” (weekly manga anthology) type of manga, and my all-time favorite one is “Hokuto no Ken”. I’ve been re-reading it lately, and my inner child is getting excited. My favorite move is “Hokuto Shichishi Seiten” (Seven Star Points of Death). Even the sounds when the enemy loses are funny, like the famous ones “abeshi” or “hidebu”, but there’s also minor ones like “nani wo para~” (the word “what” followed gibberish), it’s the funniest. (laughs)

― You spoke at the last interview that you wanted to eat Yoondong-san’s cooking, but did that come true? 

SHUNYA: Yes, we ate it! It was so good~!

YOONDONG: I made them kimchi fried rice.

HEECHO: Wait, when? I didn’t eat any (laughs).

YOUNGHOON: When everyone left for BUGVEL’s recording, Shunya, Yoondong and I ate together.

HEECHO: We were eating takoyaki that time at the studio. I love takoyaki.

― There were some comments from overseas fans on the last interview, but are any of you studying any foreign languages? What word did you learn lately?

SHUNYA: I read Korean vocabulary books sometimes, but I watch a lot of Korean drama and I’ve been starting to understand some words that are said a lot in drama. 

HEECHO: My hands are already full from learning Japanese and I haven’t been able to learn other languages. I still need to work on my Japanese…

TOMO: But all 3 Korean members have been naturally studying Japanese, so they are very good in Japanese.

HEECHO: All the Japanese words that the members have taught me were all bad words… (laughs). 

TOMO: Hey, that’s the other way around! (laughs) I ask them to teach me Korean, but they always teach me bad words. 

HEECHO: (laughs). The world out there is dangerous these days, you need to know some strong words (laughs). 

TOMO: Other than bad words, they taught me how to say 삼겹살 주세요, which means “can I have pork belly?”

SHUNYA: (Heecho whispers something in his ear.) Just now, I learned how to say 그렇게 하면 죽도 밥도 안돼, which means “it’s going to be half-baked if you continue like this”.

TOMO: This is the type of thing they teach us (laughs). 

YUGO: 멋있지？I look cool, right? (laughs)

Everyone: Yugo is so cute~!

JUNE: The word I learned lately is “kaibyaku”. It means the beginning of the world, of time. I found it while searching for a more complicated word during the lyric writing process because the expression felt off and I thought there was another way to say it. 

HEECHO: For me, it’s “mugi to kome no nimousaku” (double cropping of rice and wheat). I learned it while studying a kanji practice book for Japanese grade school students and it left a strong impression on me. 

YOONDONG: I learned the word “kyakuashi” (customer traffic). The meaning was different from what I intended to say, but I learned the word. Is it a bad word?

TOMO: No, you can use it as “customer traffic increased, or decreased”. It’s not a bad word. 

YOUNGHOON: For me, it’s “waruagaki wo suru” (futile resistance). I resist fate in a futile way. I learned it while writing lyrics. 

What about the debut date? “I felt emotional at the CD shop… It didn’t feel real.”

― You debuted on November 11, but how does it feel like to have debuted?

HEECHO: Nothing much changed just because we debuted, but we got here as a result of pursuing what we wanted to do. That is why there wasn’t any big change, but I hope we can continue with the same mindset.

YOUNGHOON: After releasing our debut album and seeing everyone’s reactions, I thought a lot about our situation and our responsibilities and it made me feel like we need to make even better songs and show an even better version of ourselves in the future. We are preparing for our next release with utmost effort. 

― For Heecho-san, Younghoon-san, and Yoondong-san, this is your second debut. Did you give any advice to the 4 others?

HEECHO: I think it’s just a number, and there isn’t much to mind about just because it’s our second time, but there are things we can say because we have experience debuting once previously. It is the first time (for the Japanese members), so I’d like to teach them what I know. 

TOMO: I think they do have a certain emotional leeway. There were hardships until we reached our debut, but there were a lot of moments the 3 helped and cheered us up. 

YOUNGHOON: If we could do more activities, I think there is more I can teach them, but there isn’t much we can do amidst the pandemic situation… Later, when we will be able to do more, I’d like to relay more of our experience. 

― How did you spend your debut date?

YUGO: Nothing much different, we just practiced as usual.

TOMO: I think we were doing voice training.

HEECHO: The Korean members were learning choreography and practicing dance. 

YOUNGHOON: Yoondong was buying pyjamas that day (laughs).

JUNE: We were just doing lessons as usual even though it was debut date, so although I was internally excited like “today is debut date!”, I was a little bit sad that the lesson menu was hard as usual (laughs). 

SHUNYA: The Japan members had the chance to go to CD shops for greetings. I was surprised seeing that the store decorations were, very, big? It made me really happy. It didn’t feel real. 

YOUNGHOON: I saw the pictures too and it made me really happy that the shop staff wrote descriptions of our songs in so much detail. If we have the chance, I want to cook for the shop staff (laughs). 

Everyone (laughs). 

YOUNGHOON: I also read the messages from EαRTHs in the notebooks placed at the CD shops. There were a lot of messages written in hiragana so that we understand too, it made me happy. EαRTHs are really nice. 

Struggles experienced especially because they are self-produced. “Thankful for all the support from many”

― The album “00” was definitely a challenging work, like you spoke about it in the previous interview. A lot of comments from fans were sent to Kstyle too. How were the reactions from fans after the release?

Everyone: Ohh~! (Clapping)

YOUNGHOON: We’re very grateful and happy. Every song was made with a lot of attention to details, so I hope EαRTHs listen to them a lot and enjoy it.

YOONDONG: My wanting to make something better and to perfect our performances got stronger, especially because we debuted. 

― Last time, we asked you about the recording process. How were the parts separated within the songs, and how were the solo songs and unit song “Mizutamari.” (written by Yugo-kun) chosen?

HEECHO: First, we all sing equal parts and then we adjust as we sing because some members suit some parts better. I chose the parts, but nobody complained. 

SHUNYA: ORβIT’s absolute leader (laughs). Heecheon-san knows everyone’s uniqueness and attributed the parts, so it turned out really nice naturally. 

HEECHO: For me, the part I thought over the most while making the album was attributing the parts. As for the solo song and unit songs, we just went with whoever wanted to do it. 

YUGO: I thought “Mizutamari.” could be the three of us (Yoondong, Shunya, Yugo) who don’t sing chorus parts often. I attributed the parts as the writer as well. It was my first time writing lyrics and I had never thought of doing it before, but after becoming part of ORβIT, I’ve been wanting to try new things such as piano as well. It’s a memorable song for which I challenged lyric writing for the first time. The track was composed first, onto which I wrote lyrics. 

― In Younghoon-san’s song “MOONCRYSTALPOWER”, the sole Japanese part amongst the Korean lyrics was also a hot topic. Many said that it’s a very “Younghoon-san like” song. 

YOUNGHOON: I always get the comment that the phrase “yuusha no sakebi” (a hero’s scream) is very “funny”, but I meant it in a serious way (laughs). At the time, there was a manga I liked a lot and I also thought of the word “boukensha” (explorer, adventurer), but it became this in the end. The lyrics are about a hero parting ways with his friends and waiting until they come altogether, but it felt like ORβIT and EαRTHs. I thought that maybe fans will understand if I put it like this, so I wrote the lyrics like that. 

HEECHO: It’s Younghoon’s scream, in the end (laughs). 

JUNE: When Younghoon-san asked me about the lyrics, I listened to him and gave advice. Every time people tell him that the lyrics are funny, he blames it on me and says “Jun said they’re nice!” (laughs). 

YOUNGHOON: It was all good as a result! (Younghoon and Jun exchange a hard handshake)

―You released from an independent label and even produced your goods on your own, but was there anything hard during the production process?

HEECHO: There were a lot of hard things, but we don’t want to make excuses about it because it’s something we chose to do. It was hard, but I think this was a good way to do it. It’s something we were able to achieve because of the members and staff we have now. 

TOMO: We separated the tasks between the 7 of us, and Shunya thought a lot about the goods and the CD jacket art. 

SHUNYA: There are many things I was able to learn because we are self-produced. For example, there’s a lot of scheduling in order to meet deadlines for production and other small tasks too. It has made me realize that making music isn’t just about singing, but there are a lot of people behind it who support it. I am glad I was able to realize this by releasing from an independent label. 

JUNE: The 7 of us are the ones on stage, but there are a lot of people behind it that you cannot see… Our work can only be done with the support of many, so we are very grateful.

ENG TRANSLATION BY ORBIT_INTL Source: KStyle News DO NOT RE-USE, REUPLOAD OR RE-TRANSLATE WITHOUT PERMISSION