#your name or something to that effect. the idea that the player/controller cut a deal in order to get a vessel and live but was then

[ruby-red-inky-blue]

Carrie watches: The Unsleeping City S2

there are so many spoilers and this is so long, proceed at your own risk

all the little Kugrash throwbacks are breaking my heart

but nothing more than Kug’s name coming up in conversation and Emily just silently rolling for Sofia’s relapse mechanic :(

Iga is honestly the coolest. obsessed with her whole deal. she is so practical and business minded and in touch with her roots and she has a sickly dragon familiar and she’s magical but kinda doesn’t give a fuck? incredible

“you don’t have time to date! you’re falling out of a tower!”

it infuriates me how Brennan is so detail oriented but then whenever it comes to Europe he gets the most hand-wave-y imaginable. sir. sir. you cannot describe a Polish landscape as Alpine. consult a single map. wtf.

what is a borscht bite my guy that is a soup. how do you serve a soup as finger food and also how does sheep’s cheese factor into any of it

honestly every campaign Murph just figures out a whole new flavour of “deeply pathetic guy” but i think he may have hit peak rock bottom with “he’s a mall goth without a mall”

i’ve never seen nerd culture parodied so viciously every time Cody speaks i cringe so hard i swear my toenails roll in on themselves

the Ricky/Cody duo trying to puzzle out a plot point at the mist wall in Iga’s castle is fascinating to watch because the characters are the objectively worst choice and the players are the objectively best choice. It’s like they probably could figure the whole thing out here but it would be out of character so they can’t it’s very funny

Sofia talking to Cody like an exasperated single mother with a misbehaved thirteen-year-old

Iga’s traditional fairy tales disappearing from the shelves is just devastating. Mr Mulligan I just want to talk

“Murph summoned New Jersey!”

nobody looks more mortified at the New Jersey incursion than the guy actually from there. honestly this is so relatable I’ve been nothing but mortified by my fellow state citizens for years

Lowell is just. such an absurd yet incredibly effective plot device. And frankly an incredibly solid communicator

“All I can think about is how I could have sold him Xanax”

done!Ricky is not something I expected to want but it is glorious

Lou rules-lawyering his way into remote-controlling a Tesla

“I just want you to know that I’ve rolled a trigger roll every time you do something with the weapon that my husband gave me -“ “Oh GOD-“ “Cody has no idea, how could he know?” “Yeah, do it, Murph, do the bit!” YIKES

Sofia casting silence on Ricky so he can scream a bit

so last season the mission statement was “New York, New York” and this one it’s “In A New York Minute” I want to be annoyed but I’m so impressed god damn it

Kingston trying and failing to convince Sofia he *wasn’t* constantly out on Staten Island when Jackson was running the show

Cody being super emotional finding out that Santa is real

also the sheer delight from the players when Wally’s return is announced <3

“Not only did you not get the Questing Blade but you have a magical sword that would be cooler than the Questing Blade if you didn’t feel like you deserved the Questing Blade.”

“The fact that you said this like it was something that - ‘these aren’t clowns, these are true clowns’”

La Gran Gata fully distracted by the Garfield float ❤️

as much as every line out of Cody’s mouth gives me a headache, giving Pete just the most cringefail of cis guy friends is somehow a stroke of genius

Pete pulling a real Riz move and getting out a fucking gun in the most whimsical of settings

Ally did not come to play this fight hot damn

Lou deciding to be largely useless because Kingston *would* just fucking hate running around a balloon float is some excellent commitment to the roleplay

“Don’t worry I’ve been cut in the chest before, I healed up, I have plenty of Arnica left at my house” Pete you’re my hero

“NOTHING BAD IS EVER GONNA HAPPEN TO US” Lou 😬 buddy 😬 Mr Wilson 😬 sir 😬 you are jinxing this HARD

Kingston ✨✨💫hacking✨💫✨

Emily’s deeply pained “nooo don’t make us go to New Jersey” is sending me

“Cypher Energy presents: The Gladiator Industries Recreational Rotating Horse Area” I’d like to teach my followers the incredible German saying “I can’t possibly eat the amount of food I want to throw up”*   *Max Liebermann, German Jewish artist (1847-1935), reportedly made this comment at the sight of the Nazi’s celebratory torchlight march through Berlin on the day the NSDAP seized power in parliament in 1933.

Sofia just hammering into Cody to fucking behave at the Kugrichs’ home is breaking my damn heart

I think in some way or other Murph has been responsible for at least seventy percent of Sofia’s relapse rolls so far

seeing Brennan’s love for that scene where Kug awkwardly hopped around the crime scene at his son’s home disguised as a ratty eagle fills me with such joy

“most of them have committed crazy tax fraud because they’ve been alive for so long so we just get the city to repossess their homes and then we bulldoze them in broad daylight and it’s a much easier way to hunt vampires” David takes after his father in the funniest way imaginable I adore him

Emily just fully walking into that nativity joke, good job everyone

Kingston’s aggressive thanksgiving invites

Murph is so committed to playing this 27-year-old goth who used to hold a management position like some brutally repressed sixteen-year-old

Ricky is just. such a good guy. like yeah obviously but honestly Zac’s ability to make characters that are so profoundly good just bowls me over all the time, what a guy

the whole bit about JJ’s loneliness speaks to me, Big City Loneliness is so real that poor kid (someone get me out of this city 🙃 help 🙃)

Pete bringing special drink options for Sofia to the thanksgiving party 😭

“turns out all of her rules were based on a hunch from a woman in the 800s”

there’s no way to describe how Brennan is doing both the most and least convincing drug pusher imaginable but I am concerned by 53\/3N

I’m living for JJ’s cheerful enthusiasm to steal back the Native art from the Met, and the fact that Ricky is completely down with it

Alejandro!

“Misiek dies... all the time. you probably just find him dead every three days or so. he is not well.”

Cody, Ricky and the katana is just. just oceans of pain. like I have subzero interest in Japanese culture personally and I still think white men with katanas are the worst flavour of all

I’m still trying to figure out if Cody was created to be funny specifically to Emily or to Brennan. I mean probably Emily but honestly I did not expect this to be the character that cracks Brennan’s composure most often

for a former English linguistics major I am really not that good with accents and I can feel my brain leaking out my ears trying to pinpoint what the hell Brennan is doing with this unicorn

ah yes, the spirits of New York, a juicy cockroach, a spicy pigeon and a regular unicorn

Brennan’s little tangent about love for objects not out of materialism but out of a love for history and permanent tangible traces of time??? my history nerd heart swelled five sizes yes you GET it

“I’ll admit, when I wanted to sort of honour Kugrash by taking up his mantle I did not assume I would also take on his aesthetic and that is something that I’ll have to think about but overall this is a net positive” oh Ricky

are they. are they playing some variation of “new york minute” over Brennan’s technobabble explanation or am I hearing things now. if so, massive kudos

the idea that you could change or destroy magic by making it evident to more people because it would be impacted by being observed!

“Can you ask Nod if it’s possible to bring somebody back?” “Dale?” “I was thinking Kugrash.” honestly Murph very deservedly won a wife guy poll but Emily is consistently 100 percent ride-or-die for his little creature pcs and all their questionable decisions and that shouldn’t be overlooked

genuinely choices were made with whose closeup they chose to cut to as a reaction sometimes

"I might be pregnant and if I am I have to tell him, it might be more complicated -” “I have three bricks of cocaine in my backpack right now!”

“let’s go to the bathroom and you flush the cocaine and I take a pregnancy test”

“Pete you’re on your knees in a bathroom stall flushing bricks of cocaine. you’re also in Nod so this toilet sprouts two eyes and goes yum yum yum, I’m always hungry!” this is why i cannot talk about this show outside of tumblr jesus christ

“toilet don’t make it look fun, whatever you do!” “nonononono, I’m not - I’m not having fun! this isn’t fun, I just - I just feel very productive does anyone want to write a screenplay?”

Cody having a brief moment of clarity about cultural appropriation and just hanging around a museum while everyone else tries to save the fucking world

dude is finally over the first bump of the Dunning-Kruger curve

I have such a deep desire to see Iga in her eighties get-up, Eastern Bloc eighties hits different

“does Pete know what an anglerfish is? ... what you thought was this entitity reaching out to Heather is really just a lantern.” HOW DOES HE KEEP DOING THIS wtf Brennan calm down

oh boy knowing this campaign was filmed in late 2020 makes so much sense with how much visceral loneliness and creeping despair there is in it (and also obvious DIY haircuts)

“MY LUNGS ARE MADE OF LIGHT! I’M NOT GONNA GET POPCORN LUNG IN HEAVEN!”

love how much the previous season matters to this one. all the big and some little choices come back and Kug isn’t just missed but his absence is actively creating problems in the world and the sacrifice mattered but also the sacrifice created a hole because that’s the point but it’s still mostly its own story

take notes, serialised media

Siobhan coming in clutch with the historian’s latin: targeted guessing

I’m so agitated that they may be getting the “what if anything remains” line wrong because I think it comes with a bunch of commas (”what, if anything, remains?”) and that’s my brand of nerd in a nutshell

also (and that is even more on brand) i have like .4% of Latin but that sentence does not look right

oh good after the anglerfish thing we’re dropping megalodon metaphors into the conversation! nng nothing gets me like deep sea horror

Sondheim’s back!

Cody finally putting some work in to learn about arms and armour only to come out of it butt naked with the worst sword in the world is so painfully on brand

“he doesn’t need the underwear, no. he might need to chafe a little to... learn.”

“I had a house once”

Murph slowly losing his mind in the upper right corner for the entirety of that Perry the Pigeon encounter

Kug’s deeply bizarre descriptors being mythologised will never get old. how is the pigeon spicy?? will we ever know

obviously Dr Lugash is an absolute hero

Sofia and her invincible embryo are cracking me up, big ups to Brennan for just preemptively going “we are absolutely not gonna do a miscarriage plot line thank you”

but also I just watched two friends roleplay a gynaecologist appointment for like twenty minutes. not a thing I ever thought I’d do for fun but sure

“we exit from the chest -” Ally, dejectedly: “...eggsit.” Murph, in an equally disappointed tone: “I thought the same thing.” “we’re not proud of it.”

Brennan fully imploding with the cuteness of his own story when Kingston holds the egg

“Iga resolved hundreds of years of tension between humans and dragons, it was really something!” “I almost talked to Cody... but then I didn’t.”

living for the meta jokes about the structure of the episode “hey Sophie, remember how we didn’t talk at all during that really long train ride?” “Pete takes off his beats headphones, like, oh, are we all talking again?”

the monastery! of little cockroaches! with toothpick sticks! praying to a rat that is the universe!! I may be crying over cockroaches here soon

“when I meditate very deeply, sometimes I can feel his whiskers, I can feel his presence... he ate the bagel of all things and he knows everything and even when he knew everything he still chose to love the universe” my HEART

“He really is Rat Jesus” Ally’s voice so perfectly caught between wonder and laughter, and like same, Brennan turned the one-off joke from the beginning of Kug’s intro into a?? profound truth?? somehow, I’m amazed

“rat jesus in the aspect of the chinchilla” I want to know all about this theology. Happy Easter btw

the sword stats are insane, and giving the unluckiest player known to man a weapon he has to roll a 15 or higher to even lift is probably the funniest and cruelest thing I’ve ever seen good job Brennan

first attempt to use it he rolls a nat one. poetic cinema.

Brennan’s rant about weapons that are sharp on more than one side is so good

“What sort of faith would you say is shielding you right now, Cody?”

“You stand on sacred ground, and will meet only death!” I know he rolled a nat 20 but Lou did not have to go that hard, damn

the idea of Iga’s kids doing Kug’s dumb dance on tiktok is the most precious thing in the world to me

the. the cockroaches have taken prisoners of war. and are treating them in accordance with the geneva conventions?? yet another thing you just can’t think about for too long

Brennan (who usually handles deities in stories incredibly deftly) outsourcing this huge exposition dump to Kug is a weird call narratively? it’s really hard to keep a scene emotionally rewarding while rattling off a list of very specific fetch quests, and also. you’re already asking Mr Grounded Irreverence to pull off an enlightened being and then you give him a wall of text to read out? I think with most cosmic beings shark movie rules apply. can’t show us the whole shark. Kug only works as hints and glimpses and vague impressions on the breeze now, much as it kills me

that said, Murph-as-Cody complimenting his own character design is pretty funny

ooooooh the little twist with someone settling Pete’s debt with 53\/3N, this is the good stuff

the ongoing bit about Sofia’s tablet that she can’t get to work, the Dream Team remains hilariously low tech New Yorkers only

don’t quite want to know what it says about me that for the entire time of Sofia’s conversation in front of the church I had my hackles up SO much. like I just Do Not Trust men to just be that nice for no reason (a very lovely take on it tho)

“….Jesus fucking Christ.”

“we’re not gonna put this dragon through college”

this whole conversation is such a gift

Brennan still getting shit for “you lay together”

Murph’s face when Ally goes “I hide Nod in my spleen, the heart’s too obvious”

Ally truly is the MVP this season, they are the heart and soul of this campaign

Ricky is the absolute worst time traveller. what a mess bless him.

MISTY! Well, Holly, but same difference!

the prophecy of the Irish woman is SO cool

ALEJANDRO!

Misty/Holly already flirting at Kingston is so funny, Siobhan you are so underrated

pretty sure Kingston just put a lit candle in his pocket

“young man, that’s a nice coat”

“Kug ran a great catch-neuter-release. They just loved him, just herds of cats....”

Rowan!

the only thing funnier than Murph’s shock and outrage at the Beck’s can opener was “your husband got you a Visa gift card for your birthday??” last season

the reactions to “I’ve told Tony we might be able to save Heather and I think that was a mistake” are the perfect reverse of the six of crows ‘how to steal a man’s wallet’ Lou (in character): “no I doubt it was!” Ally (in character): “no no, trust your intuition!” Murph (out of character): “literally... literally how could you not” Siobhan (in character): “do you want me to beat this guy up, he sounds bad. what are we doing.”

Siobhan’s characters don’t even tend to carry knives but are somehow always most likely to stab a bitch

Kingston just wandering around with a huge egg

“Sofia, you are a woman pulled over on the side of the road, punching the backseat of your own car” “this! is! not! my! low! if you can believe it!”

an excursion on Heaven’s return policies

“I need a fucking weapon”

the most poignant little meow from Brennan’s cat

the absolute shock in the whole group that Cody read Dante’s inferno

honestly getting Rowan to sub in was a stroke of absolute genius

“i have subtle spell you sad, sad man”

Cody and Lucifer aka Brennan and Murph having a cringe-off

Brennan was definitely gunning for this to be heartbreaking but Emily’s initial attempt to save Dale is all chaos, “this just looks like an insane breakup. a real Staten Island breakup.”

Ricky is excited to baby-proof the house, naturally

the bit about the drones’ AC is so funny and I can’t explain why

“what do you mean, racing a moped through a tunnel in a dark cave isn’t safe and good?”

the divine intervention roll! “I think Brennan just actually came” (Siobhan is 100 percent correct on that) “don’t touch me don’t touch me” (on a zoom call)

“say it in an excited way to trick Brennan into thinking - oh I actually got an eight!!”

half the party playing hot potato with Kug’s legacy for several minutes

the continued bit of people inviting Ricky to go jewellery shopping is glorious. “I don’t think he’s gonna get it on his own.”

does this mean nobody can eat at the amusement park?

jesus the fucking green screen clipping in and out every five seconds is so bad, why do i chose not to just go audio only

Iga has a storytelling night in Pete’s bookshop :(

Ricky’s “You Don’t Have To Be Good” afterschool sports club sounds like a thing I would have needed in school tbh

Em!!! how I’ve missed you

the commitment to Spaghetti’s Bakery my beloved

“so how is Flute Neuter Release going?”

[yu3s]

* me after naming the vessel i made “VESSEL” because that’s what i thought i was supposed to do after being told to create and name a vessel and then watching them get discarded: now that was a lot of damage...

[zarla-s]

yo dawg any thoughts on DR chapter 2 thus far

I SURE DO because BOY there was a lot to unpack in that chapter. I'm still trying to sort out my thoughts about it, I like literally just finished the alt route a few hours ago which just gave me a whole bunch of new info to try and sort through, haha. I’m going to need to sit down and really think about it for a while before I can start spinning things together effectively.

BUT ANYWAY, FOR QUICK SPOILER-FREE THOUGHTS CHAPTER 2 WAS REALLY GOOD AND I LIKED IT MORE THAN CHAPTER 1 TBH I loved the expanded mechanics and the new sense of depth to everything, it gave a much clearer picture of what Deltarune is going to be than Chapter 1 I think. I think I was also more open to it this time since I was prepared for it going in - I got totally blindsided by Chapter 1 and had no idea what was going on or what it meant or if it was a sequel or what, but this time I knew what the deal was so I could just take Chapter 2 on its own merits. Loved the characters and the enemies and the bullet patterns were all really cute, loved it. It all felt really cohesive.

SPOILER THOUGHTS UNDER THE CUT for both the main route and the alt route (I like the name Snowgrave for it but in my head I just keep calling it the alt route, haha)

I’ll just do this as a list because I don’t have the energy to really get in-depth with a lot of it at the moment.

I’m really suspicious of Ralsei. I was suspicious of him before but I’m really suspicious of him now. It’s weird he can walk around in other dark worlds without turning to stone, that there’s a room for Asriel in the Queen’s mansion and not one for him, and VERY weird that he knew exactly what Kris had to do in the real world to bring the other darkners back into the dark world. How did he know that. Also he looked cuter with his hat.

Spamton is great and creepy, I was able to do his battle first try! Which was way better luck than I had with Jevil lol. Although, today I went to try and do it again just to check, and I spared Jevil my first try. :O So maybe Jevil got rebalanced? I dunno, it just seemed a lot easier all of a sudden. ANYWAY, SPAMTON IS GREAT

Spamton has to be ghost related but i’m not sure how yet, I assume Mettaton due to the form and the wings and the name and the recurring Neo motif in his theme, but there was also general ghost motifs in his theme as well and some things don’t add up. It did look like you find the disk in Mettaton Neo’s discarded body, and Seam says it might have belonged to an old Lightner. A lot of ghost connections. What if Spamton is Dess’s ghost

Love Queen and the Tasques, goes without saying I’m sure, all the enemies were so cute. Loved checking on Lancer in my items.

Hugely pleased with the ramped up gay and also Noelle is precious

Kris opening the fountains is an interesting twist. I wonder if they opened the first castle town fountain or not (also, no one else seems to see the castle town door?). It’s weird because there was a door connecting castle town to the card world, and there was no door to the cyberworld. But somehow Ralsei knew how to get there anyway? How did he get there? How could he tell. Ralsei’s up to something. I do not trust him.

Susie’s the best

The Snowgrave route is really creepy in a different way than the murder run in Undertale which I’m very intrigued by, I want to see where that’s going. There are interesting parallels you could draw between Kris controlling Noelle and the player controlling Kris, but again it’s something I’ll have to think more about before it becomes something more coherent. Something something “strength” being achieved by giving up control to someone else, blocking out what they do, just doing whatever they tell you, something something

lol berdly died lol kris just shoving his body in a closet

The Flowey TV at the end is also intriguing, I wonder if Flowey is the one forcing Kris to remove their SOUL and do stuff. I wonder. Kris moves so jerkily without your control and also it seems like it takes a lot of time for Kris to get enough strength or control to move to pull the soul out in the first place. There’s the puppet/string connection that Spamton highlights, but also when he says that even when all the strings were cut, he wasn’t free. It could be that taking out YOUR soul just leaves Kris open to Flowey’s control instead. I dunno. Lot of questions.

Also strange that Kris deliberately opened the front door and turned on the TV before opening the fountain. And that they take their SOUL out pretty regularly, apparently? Toriel doesn’t seem that bothered by Kris spending a ton of time in the bathroom with the water on, anyway.

So Kris opened the fountain in the library at the end of chapter 1, then also went and ate all the pie. Then Kris went out and slashed Toriel’s tires (presumably) and possibly ate all the sugar in her car before opening the fountains. I wonder if there’s a connection between sugar and Kris pulling your soul out to do whatever.

 Ralsei says darkners turn to stone when they’re in a world that’s not their own, Onion says they hear a song from the ocean they can’t remember but they’re sure they’ve heard it before (Mother 1 nod, I see you!):

Just gonna throw this out there.

I spent a bunch of time getting the egg and putting it in Asgore’s fridge and NOTHING, DANG IT

Noelle seems able to hear your voice as the player, or at least a strange terrifying voice that doesn’t seem to be Kris’s. My guess is the player, but if the TV really is Flowey, then maybe it’s him? Questions.

lol throughout the snowgrave route i called noelle my murder girlfriend

By the way you can do the Snowgrave route even if you’ve spared everyone up to that point. You can also start sparing people again right after Noelle leaves. Thus names like Murder run or Genocide run don’t really fit to me. Neither does weird run, weird implies something a lot less... dark? I think Snowgrave is the way to go here. Or alt I guess but that’s pretty vague, although people will probably know what you’re talking about.

I CAN’T BELIEVE I GOT ROBBED OF PAPYRUS AGAIN well no I can believe that, part of me thought that might happen BUT I WAS HOPING

The difficulty level was nice throughout, not too hard and not too easy. Close shaves, but nothing frustrating. I think I actually only died to Berdly and Spamton on the Snowgrave route, come to think of it. NO WAIT I died a lot to the teacups leading up to Spamton’s battle lol but that doesn’t count.

There’s a lot you can make out of Spamton’s dialogue and I don’t have the energy to stitch it all together right now though, haha. What he says in the store about, what was it... a call for you, asking if anyone was there? And then in the Snowgrave route where he says you can call for friends all you want and they won’t answer? An Earthbound nod of course, but still. It makes me wonder where things are going.

(There’s a second thing I want to tie to that but I’ll probably make that a separate post)

Given that Toby said there’d only be one ending and there are routes where Berdly is alive or DEAD, I get the feeling we’re heading for a “rocks fall, everyone dies” ending more than ever. Or an ending where the world of Deltarune is destroyed and becomes Undertale, or something. idk. I’m just speculating.

There’s an explanation for Kris’s saves now! Theories I had about it before are off-base now with new information, haha. So Kris has been saving in every dark world they create, which includes Castle Town. Well, if not them though, they saved over SOMEone’s file when they showed up there. I do wonder why the spade king and Queen didn’t recognize Kris though if they were the one convincing them to create chaos in their kingdoms. Although the video of the fountain being created DID say that there was so much smoke, you couldn’t see who was doing it. Maybe Kris was in disguise.

Spamton says something very weird when he talks about the knight at his store, which makes sense if Kris was actually the knight. I can’t remember it exactly though right now.

Spamton is really insistent on talking to Kris alone.

It could be that Kris is exploring the nature of freedom/control with Noelle during the Snowgrave route since they’re struggling with that themselves. Although the closer glimpses of the player during that route (when she seems to hear you, the player’s voice) make that a bit fuzzy.

It’s interesting that Noelle’s description says she freezes the enemy right off the bat before you do anything. Also she’s really hesitant and resistant about going to Spamton’s shop specifically it seems, and when she’s there she says something that implies “why did you bring me HERE” along with the odd line “there’s no one here, no one at all” and that it’s creepy and weird, but also nostalgic for her. I almost wonder if Noelle had something to do with Dess’s death (I assume Dess is dead from how everyone talks about her). Or if she believes she did, anyway. She could just be nostalgic for the scared feeling like she says to Kris later on a normal route, but I dunno. It’s weirdly specific.

When you fight enemies down with Noelle, it always says “Noelle got stronger” even if Noelle doesn’t kill the enemy with her magic, even though I’m pretty sure her stats don’t change unless you get the ice kill.

I remember when I played the first chapter I wanted to do a murder run immediately afterwards (that’s me! I’m still doing that!) and then as I went through I noticed I wasn’t killing anyone, no matter how hard I tried. They’d always heal themselves or run away until the game went the way it wanted me to, with only minor differences. To be honest, I found it kind of frustrating. It really did feel like control was being taken away from me, particularly because it presented the option and then did nothing with it. Why let me fight if it doesn’t do anything? Why harp so much on making good choices if I can’t make any other ones? What’s the point?

Then in chapter 2, it turns out oh hey, fighting will make you lose recruits, and it’s like alright, that makes more sense. But still I felt railroaded into this sort of fluffy, feel-good kind of path. Even when I fought everyone off on a normal route, it mostly went the same except with a few different bits of dialogue. Again, it was weirdly frustrating. It felt like something was missing.

And then, you get Noelle. And then it turns out you DO have a way to kill people, after all this time. NOW you have a chance to take control and stop doing what the game clearly wants you to do, and what everyone is telling you to do. You’ve found a loophole! YOU can’t kill anyone, but NOELLE can. There was a definite kind of contrary rebelliousness during that run for me, a kind of “you can’t stop me from doing this or ruining what you wanted me to do” kind of feeling, which I assume is meant to mirror how Kris feels all the time when your soul is in them. I didn’t see it as a need or instinct to level Noelle (no one in the game can even get levels through exp! There’s no point! No one’s important stats ever change except through equipment!), just a realization that you found a loophole in what you’re supposed to do - or who you’re supposed to be. Noelle’s just a tool for that, which Spamton even calls you out about in his final battle by asking if you want to “use” her again when you call for her.

AND SHE COMES WHEN YOU CALL HER TOO HOW DOES SHE DO THAT

Also interesting: when you call for your friends in that route to help you, they don’t come/can’t hear you, and Spamton says it’s your fault. If you call for your weapon though (Noelle) she comes almost immediately. You don’t even have to call her, you whisper her name once and she’s there.

There’s a lot going on in the route is the jist, haha.

I HOPE ASGORE IS DOING OKAY ;_; HE HAS TO BEG SANS FOR FREE PICKLES

I also noticed that when Sans is like “oh you keep your flowers under glass huh, like that movie” Asgore is like “yes it’s... very similar to that movie” with a shifty look. The flower in Beauty and the Beast symbolized the prince’s life. Asgore what are you up to. Did you get up to murdering antics again. He DOES say he talks to the flowers a lot.

I think the dark worlds are getting stronger, since in Chapter 1 everyone went home mostly fine, but in Chapter 2 injuries seem to carry over. Berdly freaking dies lol in the Snowgrave route, but also if you fight the Queen during that battle where Berdly has a wire in his face, he’ll eventually pull off the wire himself and in the process burn up his arm all crispy. Then in the real world, his arm is paralyzed! So things are definitely carrying over from one to the other.

Queen has to be related to Susie’s mom issues. Ralsei says darkners are meant to serve Lightners and follow them and bring them happiness - darkners might be a kind of Silent Hill thing where they reflect what Lightners want or fear (Noelle wants her mom to love and prioritize her happiness over everything, perhaps, or is just afraid of how smothering and controlling she can be). Also sad that the Ambulance enemies show up right after you get Noelle. :( And Queen mentions Noelle making a lot of sad and strange searches - I assume searches about whatever illness her dad has or how to deal with grief or guilt.

I thought maybe Spade King was Susie related thusly because he talks a lot about being a Bad Guy, but on second thought, his main motivation is resentment about being discarded and forgotten by Lightners and the people who used to give him purpose. Maybe he’s a reflection of Kris’s issues about Asriel leaving. Just speculating.

For some reason I pictured Asriel as a like football bro due to all his trophies but it sounds like he’s just a wussy as Ralsei is lol. Which makes sense. Ralsei was always kind of worryingly accepting of the abuse you dish out to him, he’ll forgive Kris of practically anything (I gave him an S. Poison and he was like OW! I mean, uh, thanks Kris! Haha!), he’s so desperate for Kris’s validation and affection. Asriel seems to have a sort of similar tendency in constantly going to confession for KRIS’S sins and sobbing about them FOR you. I wonder if Ralsei is just Asriel’s dark world form in disguise, thus why he hid his face for so long from you and changed his name.

(If Ralsei is Asriel in disguise then that makes his behavior towards his sibling PRETTY WEIRD tbh)

Kris is such a weird edgy kid. I worry about them, haha. I don’t think it’s as simple as Kris being an antagonist to the player or the player being an antagonist to Kris. It’s definitely interesting that Kris is making the fountains and the player is the one sealing them (it specifically says its your soul doing it). At first glance, making more fountains does seem like it’ll plunge the world into darkness and chaos, but then again... Ralsei’s the one telling you that, and who knows. Maybe he has his own agenda. There was a lot in this chapter about how the dark world is better than the light one.

If the dark world versions are meant to reflect the lightner’s souls or innermost desires or idealized visions of themselves, then Kris’s soul/desire/vision of themselves is... a corpse-blue dead knight. Bit worrying.

Awful lot of scarves in chapter 2 that pushed for Ralsei to attack people. A lot of attack uppers for him. Even Spamton’s item is a weapon for him that mentions abandoning healing. I know Jevil dropped a weapon for Susie too, but I dunno.

The fact you can fuse the Thorn Ring with a Pure Crystal (wherever that is) to make a creepy sword makes me think Noelle is going to come back again. Unless you’re supposed to get the thorn ring and then take it off her and abort the run at Berdly, which you could do I suppose. Still, it makes me think you and Noelle are going to keep going down that path together.

(What if the Pure Crystal is frozen Berdly? D: Or even an item you get off of Noelle if you kill her?)

Also very interesting that the ending credit theme is a glitchy version of the first chapter end theme. Don’t Forget was reprising constantly through the first chapter, but only showed up rarely in the second one. I only remember hearing a snip of it once, come to think of it, and I can’t remember where.

Boy there was a lot of shipteasing in pretty much every direction, wasn’t there?

ANYWAY THAT’S ALL I GOT RIGHT NOW I’m going to keep thinking about it though.

[olivinesea]

Play it Right

a/n: I’m back! We’re in the single digit countdown to the end of this godforsaken school year aghhhh. So excited I can’t even tell you. Here’s some Hotch being sad but trying to be a good dad. ~3.3k

Hotch & Sean take Jack out for his birthday.

Memories of childhood were hard to come by, often only wisps of faded colors that he couldn’t completely resolve into images. There were light drenched afternoons with disembodied fingers pulling up blades of grass. Other partial scenes where dirt stained knees crawled into dark spaces where the world was cool and damp, following a trail of ants as they slowly dismantled some lifeless form. There was the sickened twist of fascination that accompanied the discovery, watching the way it was transformed from something into nothing with only the help of a few thousand tiny insects. Individually inconsequential in size, collectively a force of nature unstoppable as they reduced the abandoned shell into a small drift of feathers. The pale structure stirred and blown away easily by the air displaced when he reached down to take a single one. He dreamed about the ants coming to him, taking him away piece by piece until there was nothing left but traces of bone dust, dispersed by a midnight breeze. For any other child this would have been a nightmare but to him it was a promise. A promise of order and structure, an indication that time did in fact move forward and wasn’t trapped within stagnated pools hiding in the dim recesses of closets. That it wasn’t a continuous loop of threats and tears, of lies worn so smooth they slipped out of mouths unaware. It won’t happen again. He loves you. I love you.

It was far better to let his memories of childhood be lost. Easy enough to do with no one else who had been present at the time around to reinforce them with retelling. No one else to share with over a drink, bouncing stories back and forth, refreshing the dilapidated structures with a new coat of detail. As he let them dissolve they became defanged, passive enough to believe they were not even about him but possibly a story he’d once read and allowed to mingle with his reality. He had always been told he had a vivid imagination, maybe he could allow that to be true retroactively. It didn’t matter anymore anyway. He was still here and none of them were.

Except Sean.

He rubbed the bridge of his nose impatiently. They’d been waiting for Sean for at least half an hour. His brother, never punctual, was cutting it close once again. They were supposed to be taking Jack to the Mets game. Originally conceived by Sean, the idea was floated as a birthday gift for Jack’s tenth birthday—double digits, a big deal for any kid. Somehow this “gift” had become something Hotch had organized entirely, buying the tickets, getting Jack and himself to New York, filling in the rest of the weekend with kid-friendly activities. He’d made it so easy for Sean, all he had to do was show up and he wasn’t even getting that part right. He glanced at his watch again, resisting the urge to double check the time printed on the tickets. It was a baseball game, it wouldn’t be the end of the world if they missed the beginning.

He looked at Jack, sitting on the bench, fiddling with the laces of his glove. The glove was a hand-me-down of sorts. He had found it while helping clean out their parents’ house after their mother passed away. Sean swore it wasn’t his but it couldn’t be Hotch’s either, it was for someone right-handed. Plus, he couldn’t pull up any memories connected to it. He’d never been a team sport kind of kid. Too silent, too reserved to fit in with the loud boys who jostled each other playfully and banded together with unnecessary vitriol for the opposing teams. Hotch never understood team rivalries. Of all the many sources of hatred he’d learned, going to a different school didn’t make the list. It didn’t make any sense to create tension, to whip up emotions that had no basis. He knew enough of hate not to go looking for it where it didn’t need to exist.

Rather than argue with Sean about it, he’d taken the glove home and held on to it until Jack was big enough to use it. He wasn’t exactly sure why but he made up a story for it, weaving a collection of happy moments to accompany the time-softened leather. He told Jack the stories he felt he should have had, the kinds of stories fathers should tell their sons. He hadn’t bothered to do this when Jack was younger, hadn’t worried about his son’s perception of the past. But as Jack got older, as life took more and more away from him before he’d even had a chance to be aware of what he had, Hotch felt the need to give him pieces of a family history. He felt they should be stories that would make him feel normal, if that were at all possible with a life like this. Like he was any other kid with parents who were once kids themselves, chasing the same simple joys. He thought it might be comforting, I’ve known happiness and so can you.

Hotch would do anything to make Jack happy and even though it often made him crazy, this meant including Sean in their lives. His relationship with Sean had always been tense. There were several years after Haley’s death, after his absence in the aftermath, when things were beyond strained. Hotch, once he had surfaced enough to feel things, had burned with a white hot anger, tempting him to sever their tie permanently. It was an anger he didn’t trust himself with, strong enough to break through his control without a second’s notice. So he didn’t call, didn’t make the effort he knew was required to pull his brother back into his orbit. He never spoke of it of course but Jessica noticed. She heard Jack asking about his uncle, saw the muscle in Hotch’s jaw jump as he ground his teeth together to keep from saying something he shouldn’t. When she felt enough time had passed, she started to push him in little ways to reach out, to reconnect.

So he’d ended up here, once again, waiting for Sean, unsure if he’d even manage to remember his nephew’s birthday. Hotch was internally cursing his younger brother and considering leaving on the next train with or without him when the younger man appeared. He looked a little disheveled, hair sticking up in odd places, the shirt under his leather jacket not altogether clean. But he was smiling and calling their names, sweeping first Jack and then Hotch into a hug, almost certainly intending to irritate his brother with the uninvited contact. Hotch could smell the beer on his breath and gave him a sharp look. Sean shrugged it off and turned his attention to Jack.

“Alright kid, are you ready for this?” he ruffled the boy’s sandy blond hair as he asked. Jack grinned up at him, nodding his head a little too vigorously. Sean never failed to charm.

Hotch frowned at them. “Come on, let’s get going. We’re cutting it a little close.”

Sean scoffed and made a face at Jack, mimicking Hotch’s serious features, only to stick his tongue out and make Jack giggle. “Relax, it’ll be fine.” He punched Hotch’s shoulder, earning another glare, but they all started walking toward the platform. Hotch followed just half a step behind, keeping a close eye on Jack in the thickening crowd. He watched Sean weave confidently through people, happily becoming the lead adventurer. Hotch, who had regretted this from the moment he’d agreed, felt his stomach twisting on itself, anticipating what kind of unnecessary chaos Sean would lead them into today.

They made it to the ballpark without too much difficulty. With some shuffling, they arranged themselves in the hard stadium seats, Jack between the two men. This checked two boxes for Hotch—in the middle Jack was both protected and protecting him from being too close to his brother. If Sean had been a little tipsy when he’d shown up he could now be considered fully inebriated. He hadn’t stopped drinking beer since they got there. Hotch, already on edge, was exasperated by this behavior. However, his pointed glares got him nothing but a grin and a lifted glass waved in his direction.

Jack didn’t notice, just happy to see his Uncle Sean who was always so fun and wild. He was the only family of his dad’s that he had ever met so there was something extra special about this man, so different from his dad but somehow his nearest relative. Jack was chattering to him about kid things, filling Sean in on all the art projects and field trips and other critical moments of his life. He proudly showed off the glove, talking about how his dad told him of Sean’s skill as a baseball player and how he said he used to go watch his games and cheer him on.

Sean almost spit out beer he laughed so hard at this information. “You’re kidding. Is that the kind of BS your dad is feeding you?” He looked over at Hotch, who might have been trying to literally kill him with the look he was directing his way. “That damn glove was never mine and you know it Aaron.”

Unrelenting in his disapproval, Hotch shrugged slightly, “Maybe I have some of the details mixed up.”

“Details?” He looked back at Jack, “That glove was your dad’s and for some stupid reason he tried to throw it away one day and your grandpa kicked the shit out of him for it.”

“Sean!”

“What?” Sean was an expert at faking innocence. Jack was wide eyed, looking between the two adults, not understanding what was happening.

“Can I speak with you?” Hotch’s words were clipped, gritting them out between clenched teeth.

“Oooh Agent Hotchner, yessir,” Sean sat up straight, faking a snap to attention but the effect was lost as he swayed slightly. Hotch pressed lips together and grabbed Sean by the jacket shoulder, pulling him to his feet and pushing him out into the aisle.

“What are you thinking? Why would you say something like that?” Hotch tried not to raise his voice but he was barely succeeding.

“You think it’s better for him to believe in some bullshit you made up?” Sean spat back at him.

“Why not? I’m protecting him. He’s lived through enough, he deserves to have some happy stories.”

“So you lie to him,” Sean said, voice flat.

“It’s not lying.”

Sean wasn’t playing anymore, he was angry, every bit as angry as Hotch. His face was flushed from alcohol and emotion. He looked directly at Hotch, making sure his words sank in. “It is lying, just like you lied to me.”

“I never lied to you,” Hotch protested but the words barely made it out of his mouth.

Sean laughed meanly. “You lied to me every fucking day in that house Aaron. I saw everything, heard everything only for you to turn around and tell me it was all fine, that our dad was a good man.” He paused for a moment, looking down at his clenched fists. “I thought I was fucking crazy.”

“I just wanted to protect you.”

“Bullshit. You were being selfish, just like you are now. You think you can just change the facts and no one will know, that it won’t affect anyone else. I have bad news for you: we don’t all just exist in this world you made up in your head. Jack is a real person, I am a real person. Refusing to admit what was happening didn’t make it any less real, it just meant that I was alone with it. Just a little kid alone trying to understand why someone who was supposed to take care of me would hurt my brother and why, why my brother would lie about it. Did you think I was stupid?”

Hotch didn’t know how to respond, stunned by the bitterness of Sean’s words.

“I’m not going to sit around while you lie to someone else about our shitty father. What’s even the point of protecting him anymore?”

Hotch frowned, “I wanted you to have a normal life, a normal relationship with him. He liked you. I thought if I could keep that side of him away, you could have the kind of father I saw other kids have. I thought I could give you that.”

“You’re an arrogant bastard. Always have been.”

“Please, Sean,” he tried to find more words, some way to make Sean understand. He’d only ever wanted to keep him safe.  

“I won’t lie about this Aaron and you shouldn’t either, Jack’s going to learn everything someday, whether you like it or not. Do you want him to be able to come to you? Or do you want him to be afraid, afraid he can’t trust you to tell him the truth?”

Hotch hung his head. “I’m sorry Sean. I didn’t realize—”

Sean cut him off, “I’m done with this.” Clumsily he pulled something out of his pocket. “Here, give this to Jack, tell him I said happy birthday.”

Hotch wanted to ask him to stay but he’d already turned, walking up the stairs, grabbing the railing every once in a while to correct his balance. Hotch looked at the coin in his hand, a Kennedy half-dollar, remembered giving it to Sean on his tenth birthday. It was the same coin his father had given him when he turned 10, just before Sean was born. He remembered the time of his mother’s pregnancy as being particularly bad. His father had been careful with her, solicitous even, trying to ensure that this baby, this wanted baby, would make it safely into the world. But his temper hadn’t gone anywhere, he simply focused it all on Aaron. He'd had to miss a lot of school that fall.

But then, for no reason discernible to him, his father’s mood had shifted a couple months before the baby was due. He started coming home early, bringing gifts for both of them. Some were even wrapped (by the shop clerk no doubt, but wrapped). The glove had been one of these gifts. It hadn’t fit him right but he had said thank you and hoped he could keep this version of his dad around as long as possible. It lasted until Sean was about six months old. The first night his dad came home drunk and angry, yelling at his mom who just stood there holding Sean, too petrified to move away. Seeing that, the frailty and futility in his mother’s stance, he knew that he had to get in between them. He knew then he would do anything he could to protect his baby brother. Sean was the most perfect thing he had ever seen and he intended to keep it that way. He’d done what he could but all he really knew how to do was lie. It was all he’d ever been taught.

The glove became a nightmare that repeatedly came back to haunt him. His dad would go through fits of wanting to be a “normal family.” He would drag them out to the lake for picnics, would insist Aaron play catch with him in the yard. But he was never coordinated enough and it would always end with his dad frustrated and cursing him. When he was thirteen he started to experience overwhelming fits of anger. They came on suddenly, could be set off by anything. His vision would blur and he would feel a desperate need to lash out against the brutally indifferent world around him. During one of these fits, he threw the glove in the garbage, sick of being humiliated by it. Then, the emotion gone as quickly as it appeared, he promptly forgot about it.

Unfortunately, being an angry adolescent did not lead to the smartest decisions. His father found it in the trash and immediately went looking for his ungrateful son. He’d found him with Sean building tiny forts out of sticks in the back yard. Aaron hadn’t even had a chance to remember that he’d thrown the thing away before it was being used to leave marks on his exposed skin. Hotch wondered that Sean could even remember it, he had been so young. He wondered, too, how he could have forgotten, the sting of his failure to protect his brother from that knowledge making itself clearly felt now.

The coin, however, had been a treasured gift, inspiring him to begin a collection that he hid carefully in the back of a drawer. Something he could pull out and remind himself that there had been good moments. That he hadn’t just imagined them. Looking at his coins offered rare moments of peace in the continuous turbulence of the Hotchner household. When he was twenty and Sean only ten, Aaron had felt guilty for not being around as much. The kid had recently lost his father and was living with a quickly deteriorating mother. So he gave Sean the original half-dollar, hoping that his little brother would be able to find the same comfort in it, maybe even develop his own interest in the hobby. Unsurprisingly, coin collecting never caught on with Sean. He was too loud, too rough to spend hours inside, inspecting tiny characters and noticing slight variations in markings. Hotch had assumed Sean had lost the coin years ago, had even felt a little sad thinking about it being lost. Sean was many things but he never failed to surprise Hotch. He shook his head, clearing the lingering thoughts, needing to focus on what he was going to say to Jack. He turned to walk back to their seats.

Jack watched his approach over his shoulder, “Where’s Uncle Sean?”

“He wasn’t feeling well, he said to wish you happy birthday.”

“You made him leave,” Jack’s small face was contorted into an accusing scowl.

Hotch shook his head, ready to commit to this stretching of the truth but he stopped himself. “He was upset,” he started then paused. He really didn’t want to explain this story.

“Why?”

Hotch rubbed the coin with his thumb, “Well, he didn’t like the story I told you about the glove.”

“Why not?”

“It isn’t the truth and he thought that it was wrong of me to lie.”

Jack was quiet, thinking about this. Hotch waited patiently for him to process. “What’s the true story?”

He hesitated, “It’s not a very nice story Jack.”

“But it’s the truth?”

Hotch nodded, the muscles around his lungs constricting too tightly to speak. Jack looked too serious for a ten year old. “Then that’s the story I want to hear.”

A mix of emotion spread through him, partly anger at Sean for forcing his hand, but also pride in his son’s strength. He sighed, “And I’ll tell you, but not today ok buddy? Today is about you and about good memories.”

“Ok Dad but you have to promise.”

Hotch smiled, “I promise. Here, Uncle Sean wanted me to give you this, it’s your birthday gift.”

Jack took the offered object and looked closely, trying to figure out what it was. The metal was aged making the words hard to read through the patina. “It’s…old?”

Hotch laughed. “It is very old, you’re right.”

“What is it?”

“Well, do you want to hear the story of where it came from?”

“Only if it’s true,” Jack replied, a little smile revealing that he was teasing his dad. When had he gotten so mature?

“Of course, nothing but from now on,” Hotch held up his hand in mock solemnity. Without warning, Jack leaned over and wrapped his small arms as far as they would go around Hotch, pressing his face into his chest. Hotch hugged him back, thankful that despite everything, every stupid mistake and unforgivable failure, he had managed to get this one thing right.

[askmerriauthor]

Jedi: Fallen Order thoughts 2/?

Discussion on "Star Wars - Jedi: Fallen Order". First post here, spoilers and lengthy rambling after the jump.

Honestly, I love this box art so much purely for the facts that 1) I made sure to remove that poncho the instant I could because the game's cloth dynamic rendering had it flailing about wildly as if it were trying to attack the universe through sheer defiance of physics in every cutscene. And 2) see that alien dude on the left with a pistol? In-game, he's an utter coward who never once participates in anything remotely resembling violence and sure as hell never wields a gun. It just reminds me of how Kirby is always given angry eyebrows in the US because marketing people are fucking stupid and think players won't be drawn to the game with an abjectly cute mascot.

So! The story.

As mentioned in my previous post, "Fallen Order" basically wants to tell a Found Family tale about a ragtag group of remnants who leave behind their previous lives and forge a new future together. We have our main character Cal Kestis; a former Padawan who survived Order 66 and has been in hiding for a handful of years. Cere Junda; a former Jedi who's cut herself off from The Force, Greez Dritus; a gambling addict pilot with a troubled past he's trying to leave behind, and BD-1; an annoyingly named but utterly lovable Droid who is far and away the best character in the entire damn game. There's also Nightsister Merrin; the presumably last survivor of the Nightsisters and potentially Cal's love interest, but she basically only shows up in the last 10 minutes of the game and doesn't get a lot of screentime despite being presented as a major part of the cast.

The game takes place a handful of years after the purge of the Jedi in Order 66, where both Cal and Cere's core character thrust is tied into. Cal was a child who survived only due to his master sacrificing his life to save him and has been wracked with guilt and PTSD ever since. Cere, on the other hand, unintentionally abandoned her own Padawan and other younglings, directly leading to their death, corruption by the Dark Side, and almost falling to the Dark Side herself. The bulk of the narrative throughout the game is dealing with the relationship these two have with one another, coming to terms with their own trauma, and moving forward from there. Meanwhile, the overall plot itself focuses around finding a Holocron that has a map and list of Force-sensitive children throughout the galaxy, which the gang can use to rebuild the Jedi Order while also keeping it - and thus the children - out of The Empire's hands. The whole series of events culminates in a big showdown between Cere's former Padawan whom she abandoned and became corrupted into an Inquisitor, Cal contending with his own guilt, and the decision on whether or not the gang has the right to interfere with the Force-sensitive children's lives and potentially put them in danger if another purge were to occur.

On paper, it's a solid enough story. The actual execution leaves something to be desired.

Something I absolutely hate in games (which has become frustratingly abundant in recent years) is the illusion of choice. If a player is presented with choosing A, B, or C, that decision should matter. Which path is taken should have impact, consequence, and change the course of the story. If all three routes converge back together at the same outcome regardless of what you picked, then your choice never mattered at all. "Fallen Order' suffers from this. There are fairly sporadic points in the game where you're given the option to choose how Cal will reply to a given conversation, or whether or not to take a certain action, but it doesn't matter at all. The conversation's outcome nor the overall story isn't affected by your choice (or even if you bother to have the conversation at all), and the any time you try to do something other than what the game wants you to do, it'll just reset itself endlessly until you cooperate. You have no choice in the matter, but the game makes it appear as if you do to emulate your involvement.

I absolutely hate this in games. If a game presents you with choices, then your choices should have consequences. Your input should matter. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a linear, plot-driven game where the player has no direct input on the narrative. If anything, that gives the story even greater opportunities to shine because it allows the writers and directors to be in full control of the presentation, characterization, and story.

At the risk of sounding like a cranky old man, this is very much a "back in my day!" sort of situation where older games wouldn't shy away from simply locking a player out of content if they chose a certain path. If you pick A, you don't get to see what happens down B or C. If you want to join the Jets, you don't get to join the Sharks. If you want to see what lies down those other routes, then replay the game and make different decisions. Sometimes it was a specific design choice, other times it was a way to handle hardware/programming restrictions. But there's a big notion these days in particular where there's a desire to make sure the player sees all the game's content up front. I anecdotally chalk it up to an increase in non-gamers entering into video game development at management level and making design decisions they're not qualified for, but that's just my own take. Like, I understand the thought process behind it. "We have all this content, so we want to make it a selling point and ensure the player gets to see all of it! If they play our game and miss a bunch of stuff, they might bitch at us and cause reviews". I get it, I do. But it's also bullshit because it directly harms the final product. If a game is good, players will replay it ad nauseum for ages beyond release. So they're going to see all the content one way or another. When the "we have to let the player access all content up front" mind set is in effect, it means the player's choices ultimately don't matter and the resulting abundance of content is quantity rather than quality.

In the case of "Fallen Order", your choices don't matter one bit and it's not even out of a case of accessing content. For some reason the developers put in this vestigial, pointless façade of a dialogue tree and choice system when the game frankly would've been far stronger if it had just been left out entirely. Developers have to invest one way or another. Either make it a fully narrative-driven game and tell a solid story, or make it a player-driven game and put in the effort to make the player's choices matter. Especially in a Star Wars game, as RPGs in this franchise have historically have Light/Dark Side choices, character deaths, and alternate endings based on your decisions. A big part of "Fallen Order"'s story is characters contending with the risk of falling to the Dark Side because of their trauma, but the game itself never actually gives the player any chance to explore that at all. It's a huge missed opportunity either way.

I think that's where a lot of the story's trouble comes from in the end. It's a lot of build up on a good idea that fizzles out and goes nowhere. Cal spends the entire game getting to a point where he's ready to move on, and then the game ends. Cere comes to terms with her past mistakes and tries to redeem her fallen Padawan, only for said fallen Padawan to be killed abruptly and completely cut off that entire story thread. Greez's past coming back to haunt him is shoe-horned in randomly and never goes anywhere. Merrin doesn't have enough time on screen to matter. There are three major villains throughout the game who are just cast aside casually and with no lingering impact for ever having been there. The biggest final boss, who has been the core antagonist and a major point of emotional conflict for the entire game, is discarded with no resolution because this is a Star Wars game and we just can't have one that doesn't feature Darth Vader sweeping in to steal the spotlight.

It's just... ugh. There's potential here. There's obvious, glowing moments of potential where things could've been developed into something really impressive if they were just given the opportunity. It feels like a huge waste and the end result is just a "meh" game that doesn't go anywhere, doesn't contribute to the setting, and could very easily be dismissed entirely from the franchise with absolutely no impact.

[frankiefellinlove]

THE STEVIE FILES PROUDLY PRESENTS - THE AMAZING ROCK & ROLL ODYSSEY OF STEVEN VAN ZANDT

From The Source to Soulfire via Springsteen and Sam & Dave

Recorded, transcribed, edited, written, produced, mixed and mastered by MIKE SAUNDERS

SIDE TWO (1975-1983)

Track 6: Miami Steve, The Asbury Jukes, Tenth Avenue and Hammersmith

In early 1975, Steven returned to New Jersey from Florida, inappropriately dressed for the winter weather. “I came back with the flowered shirts and the Sam Snead hat and continued wearing them in the snow.” For the next seven years, he was known as Miami Steve. He joined Southside in the Blackberry Booze Band and within weeks they’d altered and expanded its line-up (adding keyboard player Kevin Kavanaugh from Middletown and bass player Alan Berger from The Dovells’ backing band), transformed its musical direction, changed its name to Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes (referencing their mutual hero Little Walter’s band and first single release) and established a successful three-nights-a-week, five-sets-a-night residency at the Stone Pony in Asbury Park.

“Just before that, me, Southside, Bruce and Garry went to see Sam & Dave. A life-changing moment. So me and Southside basically decided we were gonna be the white Sam & Dave, with rock guitar. So the horns came in and although we didn’t know it, we would change the entire concept of what a bar band sounded like and the respect a bar band would get by making it creative, soul meets rock. ‘Bar band’ was an insult. ‘You’re a bar band,’ which means you can’t make it in the real music world. After the Jukes, they started using ‘bar band’ in reviews and they meant it as a compliment, with Graham Parker and Elvis Costello and Mink DeVille. We changed the way people thought about these things.”

The Miami Horns were a vital component of the new band. Steven composed the horn arrangements, but although he’s always possessed a natural ability to imagine horn parts, he doesn’t read or write music (“never have”) and has always required a little help from his friends to transcribe them. “I have people write ‘em down, to this day. I like that actually. You have to do a lotta things yourself so any excuse I find to collaborate I do it. I find other people will bring something to the party usually. That’s why [I’ve] used Eddie Manion for I don’t know how many years. He knows how I like to voice things. Once I think of something and create the parts, I get bored if I have to voice every part, exactly right. If I hear a voicing I don’t like, I will change it, but I get bored by the mechanics of everything.”

While the Jukes were building their reputation and growing their audience, Bruce invited Steven to hang out at the Born To Run sessions in New York, where he was working on “Tenth Avenue Freeze-Out.” David Sanborn and The Brecker Brothers had been hired to play the horn parts, but Steven created a spontaneous new arrangement. He’s told this anecdote countless times, but I ask him to repeat it because it provides perfect examples of his innate musical talents in action (“I can hear the parts, who knows why?”), the nature of his friendship with Bruce (“I still am the only human being not afraid of him”), and his no-bullshit attitude (“I didn’t know anything about diplomacy”).

“So he says, ‘Whaddya think?’ I said, ‘It sucks, that’s what I think!’ I didn’t know how uptight everybody was. I didn’t give a fuck either. The managers and producers were all afraid of him already. He asked me a question, I’m gonna be honest. I’m trying to help my friend here, not make points with some fucking record company guy. Moment of silence. ‘He just said it sucks, which means we all suck.’ Bruce [says] ‘Alright then, go in and fucking fix it.’ So I did. I went in and sang the [new] parts. I didn’t know they were the most famous [session] guys in New York. It wasn’t insulting them, the chart was ridiculous. That was my thing, just from the Jukes being around maybe six months.”

“I wasn’t really feeling the pressure that Bruce was at the time. I didn’t realise his life depended on this album. His first two records hadn’t done very well. They wanted to drop him. I don’t know how aware I was of any of that. He invited me into the session and I’m laying on the floor. All I can think is, we’ve been hoping to get into recording our whole lives, I’m listening to this and it sounds fucking terrible. Not just the horn charts, everything. It was the worst period of recording in history. Virtually every record from the 50s and 60s sounded great, virtually every record from the early 70s sounded terrible. Because engineers took over, started close miking, padding the walls. Separation, separation, separation, all the things that make rock ‘n’ roll suck. The idea was, you isolate everything and make it sound exciting in the mix. Which they managed to do, miraculously, with the Born To Run album. Because it was pieced together in a bizarre way. Bruce made that record 100% out of willpower, he willed that into existence!”

Soon after making his instinctive artistic contribution (and singing backing vocals on “Thunder Road”), Steven was invited to join the E Street Band. It was a chance to complete the circle, play with his old friend again and settle any unfinished business from three summers earlier, when he’d been sent packing at the Greetings sessions. He made his live debut on the opening night of the Born To Run tour, which ran until New Year’s Eve. His input and influence over the next decade, onstage and off, would prove invaluable. (Bruce even began playing The Dovells’ “You Can’t Sit Down” as an occasional encore). In the fall, the tour took everyone to Europe for the first time, where the culture shock was off the charts. “There was no hamburgers, no peanut butter. The only place you could get a hamburger in the whole of Europe was the newly-opened first Hard Rock Café. There was a line around the block even then.”

Culinary deficiencies aside, Bruce also had to endure the overblown hype surrounding his first UK gigs at London’s Hammersmith Odeon, where Columbia had displayed the legend “Finally London Is Ready For Bruce Springsteen” on every available surface prior to his arrival. “[It was] completely obnoxious,” says Steven. “[Bruce] spent half the time ripping down posters. It was an embarrassing time for him, between that and Time and Newsweek. He didn’t like that stuff. You wanna be in charge of your life, that’s why we get into rock ‘n’ roll. Suddenly it was slipping out of his control. We made the mistake of playing a place with seats. It just made the show that much harder. But by the end, we got ‘em outta the seats. We went to Amsterdam, Stockholm, and back to London. The second one was a bit easier.” The experience had a prolonged effect on Bruce. “He was uptight in those days and would remain so through Darkness into The River, until he asked me to produce the record and we found a way to have some fun.”

Track 7: Epic Records, Steve Popovich and The Stone Pony

Back on the shore, Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes continued the Stone Pony residency throughout 1975, gradually consolidating their line-up. For the next three years, between Springsteen commitments, Steven worked as their producer, arranger, manager, part-time guitarist and principal songwriter. In early 1976, after circulating a demo tape, they signed a recording deal with Epic, with assistance from Steve Popovich, the label’s Vice-President of A&R. “I Don’t Want To Go Home,” the song that Steven had kept in his back pocket since his days on the oldies circuit, became the title track of their debut album and their first single. Ben E King’s loss was Southside’s gain.

“I produced [the song] in a way which was appropriate for the Jukes. They didn’t have a big background vocal thing going on,” explains Steven. “I was very conscious of being able to try and do most of it live, although I put strings on it, on my very first production! There was no synthesiser in those days that could play strings. That’s why I re-cut it [on Soulfire] the original way I pictured it, with the singer and background vocals answering. That idea of writing for someone else is extremely important, critical and essential. It changes the way you write completely, from when you think of writing for yourself, which is extraordinarily complicated and confusing. It’s not easy, but easier, to write for someone else. There’s their identity in your mind at least. I’m writing them a song. That’s a wonderful exercise for songwriters.” I Don’t Want To Go Home was released in the summer of 1976 (“I’ve never received one penny of royalties, but whatever!”). The Jukes later began their first national tour and made their European debut in 1977.

Recommended by Bruce, Steve Popovich was one of a kind. “The last of the real music guys in the business. The only other person I can compare him to would be Lance Freed on the publishing side, who’s unique. He’s actually into music and songwriting and the things you’re supposed to be into when you have a job description like that. And Frank Barsalona, the only agent who really did his job and would set the standard for everybody to follow. Those three guys, really quite historic. [It was] Popovich’s idea to launch the record with a broadcast from the Stone Pony. Never been done before. Popovich loved the local scene idea and he largely made it happen. It never would have been recognised nationally, I don’t think, if it hadn’t been for Popovich, who had the vision to say it’s cool if you’re not from New York. Rather than being embarrassed if you’re not from New York, LA or Nashville, it’s actually cool.”

Track 8: Production Credits and Political Awakening

Steven developed his talents as a producer and songwriter with the Jukes in the late 70s, following I Don’t Want To Go Home with This Time It’s For Real and Hearts Of Stone. Successive releases featured greater quantities of his original material, which included “I Played The Fool,” “This Time Baby’s Gone For Good,” “Take It Inside” and “Some Things Just Don’t Change,” apparently written for another of his heroes, David Ruffin of The Temptations. During this period, he also produced the “Say Goodbye To Hollywood” single for Ronnie Spector and the E Street Band and provided production assistance on Darkness On The Edge Of Town. His relationship with the Jukes ended when they left Epic for Mercury in 1979 and he went on to co-produce The River and two comeback albums for Gary US Bonds, Dedication and On The Line. It was an impressive fast-track apprenticeship. Steven had no production experience when he began. He acquired the skills and learned from his mistakes in the studio. “That’s why all three Jukes albums are different,” he says. “By the time we did The River, I knew what I wanted to do. I got it all down by then. That’s how I tend to do things. I can picture what I want. Jump in, do it, let’s see what happens.”

Steven also kept his promise to himself to bring his musical heroes out of obscurity, initially as guests on the first two Jukes albums. “I did what I could, but I wanted to do so much more,” he admits. “First time I get in a studio, got Lee Dorsey out from under a car, where he’s a mechanic. Got Ronnie Spector out of retirement. Second album, we reunited The Coasters, Drifters and Five Satins. Me and Bruce worked with Gary Bonds. We got Ben E King and Chuck Jackson on that record. Those artists had a talent level noticeably above everybody that followed. I wish I’d been insistent on doing more of them. In those [early] days, you actually had to have talent to make records. You had to be able to sing a song, beginning to end, perfectly in tune, perfectly the right melody, and if you fuck up one word, you gotta do the whole thing again. Couldn’t do enough for those people, they were so much fun to produce.”

In addition to his studio accomplishments, Steven played more than 300 shows with Bruce and the E Street Band between 1976 and 1981, primarily on the Darkness On The Edge Of Town and River tours. The majority took place in North America, but the River tour included a European leg that took the band away from home and out of their comfort zone for nine weeks. Much longer than their previous visit in 1975, it was their first significant experience of foreign countries, languages, cultures and political perspectives. They received rave reviews wherever they played, but Steven gradually became aware that not all Europeans viewed the United States in a favourable light.

One particular encounter was pivotal in dramatically reshaping Steven’s worldview. “A kid asked me, ‘Why are you putting missiles in my country?’ I said, ‘I’m not, I’m a guitar player.’ I realised, for the first time in my life, at the age of 30 I’m embarrassed to say, that I’m an American. What the fuck does that mean? I managed to grow up in the middle of civil rights, the Vietnam War, demonstrations about every fucking thing and had no interest in any of it. Amazing when you think about it. Redefining tunnel vision. Suddenly, the tunnel is gone. We’re now successful. Who would have ever figured that would happen, right? Now it’s like, uh-oh, what did I miss, the last 20 years?”

Track 9: Men Without Women, Motown and Mixing In Mono

This revelation accelerated Steven’s growing political awareness, one of two important developments in 1981 that would change the course of his life forever. The second came when he returned from Europe and was approached by EMI America about making a solo album. Having spent six years producing and writing for others, he welcomed the opportunity to have his own creative outlet, which soon expanded into a separate career. In the fall, he enlisted musicians from the E Street Band and the Asbury Jukes to record most of the material for his debut album, Men Without Women, using his established rock-meets-soul sonic blueprint. Including “Lyin’ In A Bed Of Fire,” “Princess Of Little Italy,” “Angel Eyes” and “Until The Good Is Gone,” it remains an undisputed career highlight for Van Zandt devotees, but Steven feels that an outside producer might have helped him make a more commercial record.

“Conventional wisdom is you never should produce yourself and I have to say that’s correct. The only exception I can think of in the history of the business was Prince, who was an extraordinary genius, but other than him, I don’t know anybody who successfully produces themselves.” Describing himself as “extremely schizophrenic, I’m twelve different people, never mind two,” Steven explains how his inner producer failed to control the whims of his inner artist. “Without knowing it, the artist takes over. I was into this extreme naturalism, no logical reason why. I did the whole album live in one day. Came back the second day, did it again, beginning to end. Couple overdubs, that was it. There’s one guitar. The horns aren’t doubled. Nothing’s doubled. Bruce did all the harmony on that record but we couldn’t use his name. We [did] a similar thing with Born In The USA, where we just recorded live in the studio.”

“I made Bob Clearmountain mix ‘Forever’ in mono, to try and achieve the perfect Motown record. It’s never gonna be exact and it shouldn’t be exact, why should it be, but I wanted to capture a Smokey Robinson Motown record. The only way I could do that in my mind was to make it completely mono. He was so good in those days. I mean Bob’s still the best, but in those days he was beyond the best. He was something else when it came down to that Neve board that wasn’t automated, and he’s feelin’ those faders. I made him do something he’d never done before, which requires a whole different way of thinking. You’re now thinking depth-wise and vertically, not horizontally.”

“That’s where my head was at. Can I achieve the emotional communication that my heroes had provided me? My heroes being Motown in general, 10 acts there. Or my heroes at Chess, another 10 acts. Sam Phillips did ‘Rocket 88’ for Ike Turner (Jackie Brenston) and ‘How Many More Years’ for Howlin’ Wolf, three years before Elvis Presley. Unbelievable genius. [I’m] trying to achieve that level of quality in my own world, in my own little bubble, which has these ridiculously high standards. I’m absorbing the 50s and 60s and then trying to integrate them in my head and reproduce them in my own way, not the least bit interested in what’s going on in the 70s or 80s certainly, because it was shit to me, comparatively. An interesting moment here and there. Punk was certainly interesting. But mostly it’s all coming from what I call the renaissance period, ‘51 to ‘71, where it all was created. And that’s true to this day. That’s all I was interested in and that was enough for 10 lifetimes. I didn’t need another bit of input after 1972.”

Track 10: Little Steven, Little Richard and Bob Dylan

In 1982, after recording with Bruce and Gary US Bonds, Steven completed his album, formed the Disciples of Soul (which included Dino Danelli from The Rascals on drums, Jean Beauvoir on bass and Eddie Manion, Mark Pender, Stan Harrison and La Bamba on horns) and played a debut concert at New York’s Peppermint Lounge. Released in October, a month after Nebraska, Men Without Women preceded his first national tour and was credited to his new professional name of Little Steven, which would be used for all future solo activities. “I just wanted separation [from] being the sideman,” he explains. “Each of my personalities required a different name, in order to keep it straight in people’s heads and my own head.” The name referenced his early heroes Little Walter, Little Anthony and Little Richard. In his role as an ordained minister, the latter officiated at Steven’s wedding to Maureen Santoro in New York on New Year’s Eve. Percy Sledge sang “When A Man Loves A Woman” as they walked down the aisle and the reception included performances from Gary US Bonds, Little Milton, The Chambers Brothers and the wedding band from The Godfather. “Little Anthony was doing a cruise at the time or he would have been there.”

“All I can think is, we’ve been hoping to get into recording our whole lives, I’m listening to this and it sounds fucking terrible. Not just the horn charts, everything. It was the worst period of recording in history. Virtually every record from the 50s and 60s sounded great, virtually every record from the early 70s sounded terrible. Because engineers took over, started close miking, padding the walls. Separation, separation, separation, all the things that make rock ‘n’ roll suck. The idea was, you isolate everything and make it sound exciting in the mix. Which they managed to do, miraculously, with the Born To Run album. Because it was pieced together in a bizarre way. Bruce made that record 100% out of willpower, he willed that into existence!”

Steven toured internationally in 1983, then dropped the horns, adopted a more contemporary rock sound and made his second album, Voice Of America. It was an explicitly political record that featured “Solidarity,” “I Am A Patriot,” “Out Of The Darkness,” “Los Desaparecidos” and “Undefeated.” Triggered by his River tour experiences in Europe, this radical transformation was completed with a long period of self-education. “I read every book about post World War Two [US] foreign policy. [It was] shocking how often we were on the wrong side. All of these bad things were happening behind the scenes and nobody was talking about them. No political consciousness whatsoever in the country. I decided I have an obligation to say something about this stuff that we’re all paying for with our taxes.”

“Being conscious of the fact that everybody needs their own identity, I figured who the hell needs another love song from a fucking sideman? I’ll be the political guy. Nobody else is doing it. There were people demonstrating of course. Jackson Browne, John Hall, Bonnie Raitt, Graham Nash, those guys. The Grateful Dead were doing a benefit every week, but rarely did it end up in the work. In general, people weren’t putting much politics into the lyrics of their songs.” For artists with commercial aspirations, he concedes, that’s a smart move. “Jefferson Airplane being an exception with ‘Volunteers.’ Big exception, Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, with Neil Young’s ‘Ohio.’”

Steven contends that Bob Dylan’s “Subterranean Homesick Blues” introduced the idea of political consciousness in rock ‘n’ roll. “His first electric song. It’s not given enough credit. The first sentence from Bob Dylan’s electric period, ‘Johnny’s in the basement mixing up the medicine, I’m on the pavement thinking about the government.’ What? You’re doing what? You’re thinking about the government? Excuse me? Who does that? Whoever did that before, in a song, no less? There in that one sentence, Bob Dylan communicated what his entire career was gonna be about, which was having fun with language, with inference, symbolism, metaphor and nonsense lyrics that rhymed. ‘Johnny’s in the basement mixing up the medicine,’ what does that mean? It means whatever you want it to mean, right? Then ‘I’m on the pavement thinking about the government.’ Holy shit! You mean we’re supposed to figure out the government? That, to me, is the most important sentence in all the history of rock ‘n’ roll, right there.”

All photos below by Mike Saunders

[myhockeyworld87]

Bubble Wrapped - Part 4

Word Count: 5,762

POV: Reader

Warnings: Same as always, Language, Smut, NSFW, Please see the note in the Masterlist

Teams: Bruins, Caps, Flyers, Lightning and Pens

Notes: This part got a little crazy...haha! We have a lot of players involved this time, so I hope you guys like it. Feedback is always welcome. Happy Reading!!!

Day three and four in the bubble were sedate. There were a few minor glitches here and there, but not any brawls or fighting, and you weren't thrown in the pool again. You chalked it more up to the fact that the teams were practicing more and watching films so there was a bit less downtime. After breakfast on day five, you made your rounds, making sure that the conference rooms were cleaned to perfection for the lunch crowd and doing the same with each workout room. Though the latter was a bit more complex considering most of them were occupied.

Once you found everything under control, you headed over to the tennis courts and found Sidney Crosby playing on the one court with a couple of his teammates. It felt kind of wrong to just stand there and watch him, but you couldn't help yourself. He had on a pair of black sweats and a grey Pens t-shirt that clung to his body from where he was working up a sweat. His locks were shorn as if he had just gotten them cut before coming in the bubble. Every muscle was defined as he would swing the racket and connect with the ball. Automatically, your eyes went to his ass, which was just sheer perfection and you longed to feel his glutes under your fingertips. There was part of you that wished he was wearing shorts so you could appreciate his thighs as well. Your eyes followed every move that he made, every swing of the racket; step of that he took. It made you weak in the knees and your mouth go dry.

 You tried concentrating on the other players, Letang, Hornqvist, and Petterson, but your eyes always came back to Sid. It's been five days in the bubble and you'd yet to get Sid alone, as he was always surrounded by teammates or coaches. You were going to have to do something soon, for there was always the chance they could end up losing in the qualifying rounds. You waited until they finished, then grabbed the fresh pile of towels that were sitting on the outside table, and decided to take them inside the court. They normally stayed outside, but it wouldn't hurt for them to be inside the court. They were just walking out, and you used your ass to open the door, making as if you didn't know they were coming out. As the door open, you stumbled forward, only to have Sid's strong arms grab you. "Oh sorry, I didn't realize anyone was there?" You told him.

 "No, it's my fault, I should've been paying attention instead of chirping these two," Sid said, his arms still around you.

 "Anyone need a towel?" You offered with a smile and only then did his hands come off your waist, so he could grab one. The other three did as well and soon you only had a couple left. "Everything fine with your stay here?"

 "Oh yeah, we always love staying here," Sid commented and the other three agreed.

 "Whoever put these tennis courts in was a genius," Letang added.

 "Thanks, I'll be sure to mention that you appreciate my ingenuity to my bosses when I talk to them."

 "No way, it was your idea?" Sid seemed impressed and you didn't mind taking the credit since the courts had been your idea when they decided to build this hotel.

 "I've been affiliated with the company for a while, and had a lot of ideas for when we built this place."

 "No wonder they put you in charge of the place for this whole thing. You've really done an awesome job." The compliment from Sid had you blushing.

 "Thank you, if there's anything at all you need; don't hesitate to call me." You made sure that you looked Sid in the eye as you said that. Letang elbowed him at your insinuation.

 "We'll meet you upstairs," Hornqvist stated then patted Sid on the shoulder and the three left the two of you alone.

 It was a bit awkward at first, but then you broke the silence. "So are you missing Pittsburgh at all?"

 "Nah, not really. It was kind of boring quarantining alone. This is a nice change of pace." Well, at least you had your answer about if he had anyone waiting at home for him. "Are you into architecture that you had this idea of the tennis courts?"

 "I took a few classes in college. I find it intriguing. I'm by no means an architect but I have great ideas." Well, that sounded a bit conceded. "I mean, I'd like to think they are great at least."

 "Architecture has always fascinated me as well. What else did you do here?"

 "Well, the rooftop pool was, though that took a little bit of engineering. I just loved the idea of having it up there. We ended up sacrificing the indoor part to have it, but I think it was totally worth it." It was definitely a highlight of the hotel, well as long as you weren't being shoved into by a certain rat player.

 "Oh, it's definitely beautiful. I'd love to see something like this in Pittsburgh, maybe we can steal you away from here and get you to think up something for us." A cute little smirk appeared on his face and you wanted to kiss him so bad. What was it about this man that just made you weak? You'd only ever felt this way around one other guy, but that wasn't what you wanted to think about now.

 "Well, I'm sure you could persuade me if you wanted to."

 "Really?" Sid didn't seem so unaffected by you as Tyler assumed. Apparently, hockey wasn't the only think on his mind.

 "Yes, in fact…"

 "(Y/N), I need you in the kitchen it's an emergency." Logan said breathless, as he came rushing into the tennis court.

 "Sounds like you're needed," Sid stated grabbing the door and holding it open for you. "I'll let you go."

 You were seriously going to murder Logan, especially if this was like the towel incident. "Yeah, I should probably go, but if you need anything call me." You rushed out to follow Logan, plotting the many ways to kill him on your way to the kitchen. It had better be on fire. When you walked into the kitchen things seemed under control. "What seems to be the problem, Logan? Things look fine."

 "Oh, they're not though. Chef said that no one brought in the dirty dishes from conference room two and now we don't know if we'll have enough plates for lunch." If Logan made it out of the bubble alive, it would be a damn miracle.

 "Sorry (Y/N), I thought when I told him that he would go get the dishes and not you."

 "It's ok Marco." You told the chef, before turning to Logan. "Could you please go get the dishes, then bring them in here and wash them." You tried to spell it out as best you could for the kid.

 "Yeah, sure I can do that. Don't know why I didn't think of that before." You didn't know why he didn't either, but he had just effectively ruined your opportunity with Sid. At least you were able to lay the foundation so that hopefully the next time you saw him, you'd be a bit more successful. Logan scurried out of the kitchen and Marco again apologized for not being more specific with the young pup.

 Marco told you he'd keep a better eye on Logan the rest of the day so that you wouldn't have to worry about him, and you thanked the chef and went on your way. The rest of the day went pretty easy. You tried to look for Sidney but seemed to just miss him, so you called it a night and went to your suite to get ready for bed. You were just slipping out of your skirt when the phone rang. "Hey Car, I was just going to grab a glass of wine and head to bed. What's up?"

 "Well, there's a little congregation in conference room one. It's not out of hand or anything, but they really shouldn't be in there since it's all ready for breakfast."

 "So tell them to move to their floor."

 "You know me Y/N, I'm chicken shit around these guys." It was true Carly was used to saying yes with being a concierge and most of her dealing were on the phone and she could get what she wanted that way but face to face, she found it hard to say no, or in this case move somewhere else. "Besides, I don't think they're all from the same team."

 "Ok, I'll be down in a minute." You threw on an oversized shirt and leggings and headed down to the conference room. You were surprised to see that two members of the Flyers and two from the Penguins were playing cards. It was common knowledge that the two teams were rivals, but they seemed to be enjoying the game. Well, you could hear some chirps back and forth but it seemed to be in fun. "Hey guys, I hate to break up this party but you can't be in here."

 "Aww, come on, we promise to keep the fighting to a minimum." Carter Hart said with a cute innocent little look on his face and it reminded you that Tyler said to keep away from him and not corrupt the boy.

 "Seriously Y/N, it's all in good fun," Brandon Tanev echoed and you really started to wonder if everyone in this damn place knew your name. "Hayes and I have a long-standing game from when we both played for the Jets. Thought we'd get these two involved in it since we're all here."

 "I don't care if you guys play. You just can't play here." You told them as you took in the money laid out on the table as well as the hand that Hart had. You wanted to tell him to fold for his hand was shit.

 "Well, there's nowhere else this time of night." Zach Aston-Reese chimed in. He had a point, most of the common areas closed at this time of night.

 "So like what are we talking, only a few more hands, or is this some all-night game, because I may have an alternative."

 "Not all night, we've got a game in the morning." Kevin Hayes said reminding you that the two played each other in exhibition tomorrow.

 "And no one's going to flip a table or throw a punch?" Your question was definitely valid, considering how'd you seen the two teams go at each other on the ice.

 "Scouts honor," ZAR stated, though you didn't see his fingers crossed behind his back.

 "Fine, come with me." They got up and followed you out of the room. You stopped and grabbed Carly. "Are you coming?"

 "Where? And why?" She said as you grabbed her hand and pulled her along to the elevators.

 "My room and for moral support." Once inside you pressed the twenty-ninth floor. The elevator stopped on the twelfth floor first. You crossed your fingers in hopes that whoever was getting on wouldn't question the odd mix of people in it.

 Unfortunately, you had no such luck as Brayden Point, from Tampa Bay, got on, and the first thing out of his mouth was, "Umm, what's going on here?"

 "Nothing," was what came out of your mouth. While at the same time Carter Hart said, "We're playing poker."

 "Poker? You got room for another?" Point asked and it was easier to tell him yes then have him make a scene. Thankfully, you made it to your room without any more stops along the way. "Wow, nice setup you got here." Brayden let out with a low whistle.

 "Thanks, there's no poker table but you're more than welcome to use the dining room table to play. As long as you're here do you guys want anything to drink?"

 "Tell me you have alcohol?" Kevin asked as beer was kind of at a premium in the bubble. They didn't want the players partying too much so it wasn't as readily available as they would've liked.

 "Sure that's smart with games tomorrow?"

 "One isn't going to kill us," Tanev remarked and you supposed as long as they didn't get drunk it was fine.

 "I have beer and wine. Who wants what?" Four of the guys chose beer with Carter choosing water. Which was probably a smart choice considering he was probably the starting goalie for the game. Carly went into the kitchen to help you get drinks, claiming a glass of wine for herself.

 "You sure this is a good idea Y/N?"

 "No, but what's the alternative, have them cause a riot in the lobby where everyone can see?" Carly shrugged her agreement. "At least here we can control them a little bit." Or so you hoped.

 You headed back to the dining room, drinks in hand. "You two want in on the action?" ZAR asked, which was nice of him.

 "I'm sure the sakes are a little too rich for our blood," They were Carly's words but you had to agree with her.

 "We don't have to play for money," Kevin suggested and you raised an eyebrow at him. "You know strip poker and all." Part of you started to wonder if they had made this plan before they even started to play in the conference room. You wouldn't put it past them. All eyes turned to you and Carly, and you turned to her with a shrug as if to say your call. You knew she hadn't had any fun yet in the bubble, well at least not like you had.

 "Alright gentlemen, deal us in." You took a seat between Tanev and Hayes; while Carly sat between ZAR and Point. Hayes declared himself the designated dealer for the first round, saying that you'd be playing a basic five-card draw game, and that winner could choose two players to lose an article of clothing, instead of all six individuals losing clothes. He then proceeded to deal out the first hand. Best you had was a pair of nines, so you tossed in the three cards that were pointless in hopes of gaining something that would help you out. You did pick up a pair of twos but you really didn't think two pair, nines high were going to win you anything. And you were right as Point ended up having three of a kind.

 "Y/N and Carly have to lose a piece." He declared.

 "Look I have no problem stripping but if you seriously pick the two of us every time, I'm calling an end to the game and you can all go back to your rooms." You said before stripping anything off your body.

 "That's only fair," Tanev agreed. "From now on you can only ask one of the girls to take something off." It seemed a fair addendum to your original rules, which seemed to be nonexistent before this moment.

 You stripped off your shirt and Carly did the same. Carter's eyes popped out of his head as he took in your lace bra and you realized that Tyler was right; he was way too innocent for the rest of the guys at this table or even you and Carly for that matter. Hopefully, Hayes would send him off to bed before things got too out of control. "If I didn't know better I'd swear you both wore those bras on purpose," Hayes commented and you let your hand glide up his thigh before answering him.

 "Maybe we did." You gave his thigh a little squeeze and saw him jump a bit, which caused you to giggle. "Now I believe it's my turn to deal." He handed over the cards. The round went quick and thankfully Carly came out on top, so you knew that you were safe this time.

 "Point it's payback time."

 "Gladly," he announced before throwing off this t-shirt.

 "You too Brandon. Might as well be both the B's" You caught a whiff of Tanev's cologne as he pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it to the floor. His scent seemed to be a mix of sandalwood and something purely masculine, it was intoxicating and you found yourself getting damp just thinking about what the two of you could get up to. The six-pack he sported on his abdomen didn't help your wondering thoughts any.

 "My turn," he said, palm upturned for you to place the cards into them. The smirk on his face told you, you'd been caught staring, and you handed the cards over in a hurry with a discreet cough. The third round had Carly winning again and you were hoping she was on some kind of hot streak.

 "Hayes and ZAR, you're up." She stated matter of factly and the two men divested of the shirts, leaving Carter the only one fully clothed. "I mean you're welcome to join them, Hart, if you feel left out." He simply shook his head no. "I really think you need a beer to loosen up." Carly was right and you walked out to the kitchen to grab him one. He took a long swallow and it seemed to help him a bit.

 The next round had Carter winning and the poor boy seriously looked confused about who he should choose. "It's easy Hart, pick one of the girls and one of us," Brayden told him.

 "I know," Carter said indignantly as his eyes moved back and forth between you and Carly. He seemed completely torn and part of you just wanted to take off your leggings and put the boy out of his misery, but just then he finally made a decision. "Carly, since you've been winning it's only fair." She gave him a little wink before wiggling out of her bottoms and tossing them to the floor with her shirt. Carter's eyes bugged out as he took in her thong and you heard a low whistle from Point right before she sat down.

 The deck was moved to the next person and cards were dealt. It was hard to hide your smile when you were dealt with three aces, and you were fairly confident you'd win this round; it just so happened you did. You had five guys to choose from and it was a difficult decision, but you really wanted to see what Brandon was hiding underneath his shorts, so it was a no brainer in choosing him. It was the other one that you were debating on. Tapping your finger on your chin, you mulled over your choices. "Brandon and ZAR, time for those pants to go." The problem was you didn't know which way to look. ZAR pulled the fly down on his just as Brandon yanked his down drawing your attention. There was no disguising the bulge in Tanev's boxers and you wet your lips without even thinking. He caught your attention and you swore you saw his cock twitch, but then ZAR's bottoms were falling and you took a moment to appreciate him. Both men were well-endowed and you couldn't wait to see what was underneath their boxer briefs.

 Cards were dealt again and when you looked over at Carter, you noticed the beer you got him moments ago was gone. That wasn't a good sign. Both you and Carly lost this time, with Carter coming out ahead. He looked a bit woozy after downing that beer so quickly and didn't seem to realize he'd won until Hayes pointed it out. "Hayes and Point..." he stated and before he could say anything more; all four guys were breathing down his neck.

 "What the hell?" you weren't sure who said it but it was echoed by all the guys, and you snickered before saying. "He's made his decision boys, now lose the pants."

 "But I meant to ask which one I should pick." Hart protested.

 "Too late," Carly chimed in a satisfied smile on her face. They both dropped their drawers then, each man sporting a hard-on that was outlined by the cover of their underwear. "I need more wine," Carly said and you could tell her mouth had gone dry from checking both men out.

 "Grab us another as well, would ya?" You gave Hayes a look, making sure that this was a good decision as you made your way to the kitchen. "It's fine. I swear this is the last one."

 This time Carly left you to fend for yourself as she didn't want to prance around in her thong. You were rummaging through the fridge and pulled out the five beers that you needed when Brandon came into the kitchen. "Need some help?" There was that cute little smile on his face and you returned it with one of your own.

 "That would be nice." The kitchen wasn't large and he reached around you to grab a beer that you had on the counter, effectively trapping you against it. His body was pressed against yours and you could feel his cock hard against your stomach. Your breath hitched and before you could say anything his lips were on yours. You opened right away for him as his tongue sought entrance into your mouth. Brandon was a good kisser and you found yourself reaching around to the back of his neck and pulling him closer.

 "Hey, what's taking so long," someone yelled and you pulled apart from Brandon. "Wanna continue this after the game?" He asked and you nodded your head yes, before grabbing two bottles of beer and the wine and slipping under his arm. You winked at him as you left the kitchen and could've sworn you heard him groan.

 The game started back up and this time ZAR was declared the winner. His eyes raked up and down your body before he said, "(Y/N) it's got to be you." You pushed the chair back then made a show of wiggling out of your leggings, making sure Brandon got an eyeful of your ass before reclaiming your seat. All eyes but Carly's were on you; who coughed discreetly to remind ZAR he still needed to pick someone else. "Oh um, I guess Hart by default." Carter's cheeks got red, as both you and Carly turned your attention to him, though it just seemed sort of wrong since he seemed innocent. He was definitely sporting some wood and from what you could tell he had most of the guys there beat in the length department. He hurriedly sat down as soon as his shorts were off.

 When the game resumed, it was Hayes who had a straight and won the round. "Point, since you joined the game late, I'm going with you." Brayden rolled his eyes but still stripped out of his briefs leaving him completely naked. His dick was average but still nice and you could see Carly squirming in her seat taking him in. You didn't really think Point was her type but then when you'd been in the bubble for a couple weeks like you both had those sorts of things went to the wayside. He seemed to return her interest, for as he reclaimed his seat his eyes never left hers. "(Y/N)," Kevin said bringing your attention back to the fact that you lost. "Lose the bra." You had kind of forgot that Kevin had to name another person, but you should've figured it would be you as you'd teased him earlier when you squeezed his thigh.

 "Fine," you said and you let the strap slink down your right shoulder before drawing your arm through it. You repeated the process with your left, then moved to unclasp the eye hooks in the back. Keeping one hand holding the bra together you let your other slip to the front to hold the cups, before letting the bra go. The cups released into your hands and you slowly peeled it away, teasing the boys as you did, until finally your breasts were revealed. You knew you had nice boobs. It had been commented about by almost every guy you'd ever been with, not to mention the stares you got when wearing a low cut top. Tyler had said on more than one occasion that they were perfect and he could spend hours playing with them. So when the guys' eyes went wide, you weren't surprised. It was Carter's look of shock as he downed the rest of his beer that had you suppressing a giggle. You knew he was innocent but it almost seemed too much for a hockey player to be this inexperienced. You hoped it was just the setting of the game and all. "Ok, now that that's done; on to the next hand." They seemed a bit disappointed that the game was back on instead of just ogling your boobs.

 Brandon dealt the card, the side of his hand accidentally brushing the side of your breast as he dealt you yours. It was hard not to think of the encounter in the kitchen earlier and you kind of wished this game was over and you could move on to bedroom games with Brandon. As the hand went on, you saw Carter sway a bit. "Hey Kev, you better take your goalie back to his room before he's unfit to play tomorrow." They were Points words, but he was absolutely correct as Hart was not looking good to finish the hand let alone the game.

 "Hart, you good?" Kevin asked and Carter made to put his thumb up but couldn't. "Fuck man, you're really one of those, sniff the beer cap drunks, aren't you?" Carter just smiled over. "Alright bud, time to call it a night, before we both regret this; though you owe me. Big time!"

 Hayes threw his clothes back on before tossing Carter's shirt at him, which smacked him in the face. They made their way to the door, Hayes none too happy to be leaving. "Guess this means the game is over." You said thinking to put an end to things around the dining room table and move it to the bedroom with Brandon.

 "What do you mean? It was just getting interesting." Zach pointed out, looking directly at your chest.

 "I gotta agree," Brayden added, looking over at Carly. "I have a good feeling about this next hand."

 "Don't you guys have a game tomorrow?" you asked Tanev and ZAR.

 "Yeah, that's what naps are for," Brandon told you with a little wink. "But I see your point, only a few more rounds than we'll call it a night." He picked up the cards and started to deal. They did not fall your way and this hand saw Point come out on top of everyone, which was lucky considering he was now in his birthday suit.

 "Zach looks like you're up this time." ZAR dropped his drawers without even thinking about it, giving you a nice view of his cock. It was erect, almost pressing up to his stomach. You didn't know if it was the fact that he was hard or not, but his dick was kind of pretty if that was even a thing. He sat back down before you could check it out too long, which was disappointing. Point look at Carly and said, "Your turn." There was a cocky little smirk to his face but as Carly removed her bra, she directed all her attention at Brayden.

 "You two need to get a room," Tanev said off-hand and you saw Carly cock her head as if to ask if he wanted to go to hers. Point nodded a yes, and Carly started grabbing her clothes off the floor.

 "Thanks for the game (Y/N). I'll see you downstairs." She said throwing clothes on and heading for the door. Point right behind her.

 "So, umm…" you hummed, not really knowing what to do now that you had both Brandon and Zach alone.

 "One last hand?" Brandon asked, and you couldn't really see the point of it. "If I win, I get to kiss you."

 "And if I win, I get the kiss." Zach chimed in.

 "And what if I win?" It was a valid question.

 "Then you can pick either one of us or neither of us." Brandon offered.

 "Ok, who's dealing?" You asked with an all-in attitude. ZAR picked up the cards and started to shuffle. You picked up the five cards in front of you, two jacks being dealt. It wasn't a bad start and when you got the redraw there was another one. Brandon laid down his pair of tens first, knowing that he probably wasn't going to win. Zach went next, a smile on his face that told you he'd thought he'd won with his two pair queen high.

 With a satisfied grin, you laid down your winning hand. "Read them and weep boys." They both frowned at you picking up their stuff and got ready to leave, thinking that you'd choose that option. "Oh, neither of you is not my choice." They both looked back at you, a little stunned at your statement.

 "Who's it going to be then?" Zach asked, hand still holding onto his boxers and shorts.

 "What if I say both?" They looked over at each other, a silent agreement passing between the two teammates. You grabbed Brandon's hand, then walked over to take Zach's as well, leading them over to the sofa. They both went willingly, one on each side of you as you stood there. You looked over at Zach first and went up on your toes to give him a heated kiss. He cupped your cheek, drawing you closer to him. Zach was a good kisser and you got lost as your tongue swirled with his, until you felt another pair of hands on your body, starting at your waist and working their way up to fondle your breasts. Brandon twisted your nipples and you moaned into Zach's mouth before breaking apart. Brandon turned your hips so that you were facing him, before threading his fingers through your hair. With hardly any pressure, he had you leaning into him so he could kiss you. Brandon was skilled with his tongue and you melted into him. But it was Zach's cock that pressed against your back that you felt even more. You reached behind you to palm him and he hissed out his pleasure as he dropped kisses to your shoulder blades.

 There were four hands all over your body and you weren't sure who was doing what as you felt someone slide your panties down off your legs. Brandon's mouth left yours, only to move south to your breasts, where he took a nipple in and sucked, eliciting a moan from you. Zach's fingers, at least you thought they were his, were delving between your folds. It was too much and you lost your grip on his cock. Zach pushed a finger inside you while his thumb toyed with your clit. Pleasure ripped through your body, Brandon now switching breast to give your other nipple the same lavish attention. You threw your head back enjoying their ministrations. You missed the communication between the two, but the next thing you knew was that they were lowering you down to the sofa.

 Brandon slid down to his knees in front of you, spreading your legs wide for him to go between, while Zach sat down beside you on the couch. Zach's hand immediately went to the back of your neck so that he could pull you in for yet another heated kiss. Your hands skated down his well-chiseled chest until you found his cock. Wrapping your fingers you began to stroke the length of him and he deepened the kiss.

 It was at that moment that Brandon licked a stripe between your folds. The action causing you to stutter your rhythm on Zach's cock, as your body tingled from Brandon's tongue. Two of Brandon's fingers spread you pussy for his mouth to go to town on you and you found yourself breaking the kiss from Zach. "Fuck Brandon…that feels so good," you moaned out.

 Brandon's mouth worked its magic on you, sucking and nibbling on your clit, before he looked up at Zach. "You have to taste her man, she's so fucking sweet." A quick shift in positions from the two and then it was Brandon's mouth on yours as you tasted your own juices off his lips. His hand found yours and he guided it to his member urging you to stroke him.

 Zach's fingers delved into your cunt, sliding up and down between your folds collecting your moisture. "You're so wet…I just have to taste you." He breathed out before going in with his tongue and licking at your pussy. He hummed out his approval as he continued to eat your out.

 Brandon moved his hands to your breasts, where he pinched your nipple between his thumb and forefinger causing you to gasp. His head moved down to your other nipple and he gently bit down on the turret peak. You moaned out as that familiar tingle of orgasm started to hit, from the combination of both Brandon and Zach. "Don't stop…" You panted out. "Please don't stop." Zach increased the speed of his fingers as they thrust in and out of you, while his mouth and tongue flicked and sucked your clit. "Oh god…" Brandon bit down on your nipple and it sent you shattering, your legs tightening around Zach as they shook with the force of your climax. "OOOHHH," you exclaimed and you swear your moan echoed off the walls of the suite it was so loud. Both men worked you through your orgasm, a satisfied smile on each when you finally made your way back to them. "That was…" you didn't have time to finish your thought as there was a loud knock at the door.

 "Who the fuck is that?" Brandon asked in a hushed whisper and you honestly had no idea as most of the employees of the hotel would've called your phone and not come knocking at this hour.

 "I know you're in there. I could hear you." The voice said from the other side of the door and suddenly it registered who it was on the other side.

[votederpycausemufins]

and you thought we would have less angst~! lol nope!

@petrichormeraki @helleborusangel 

Grifter left briefly and returned with Sefter and Grifect, taking them over to where Grian and Mumbo had taken Jrum. “Oh I had the best idea! Since you have your kids and Sense and I have ours, they could be best friends! I’m sure they can get along great!”

“I’m not sure that’s the best idea right now.” Mumbo said, keeping Jrum close to him. “Jrum is very vulnerable right now and-”

“I kinda do want to play.” Jurm spoke up, tugging on Mumbo’s pant leg. “It was something nice I got to do when I was with d- uh… Bad.”

Mumbo hesitated, but then nodded. “I guess it probably wouldn’t hurt. But if anything happens to Jrum-!”

“Oh calm down, I won’t do anything to him.” Grifter replied. “Besides, I’m sure he wouldn’t let me.” And he pointed behind him to a doorway where Xannes was just coming in, followed by NPG.

“Jrum’s okay!” NPG smiled, before moving behind Xannes when he locked eyes with Grifter, the hels admin crossing his arms.

“You’re out of prison.”

Grifter smiled and pulled himself close to Sense. “Of course. Wouldn’t want to leave this hot stud alone for too long, now would I?”

“Well, You’ve had time with him, now it’s time for you to go back.”

Grifter pouted. “But my kids are having a playdate with Jrum. You wouldn’t want to upset a child, would you?” Grifter’s pout turned into a sly smile and he moved closer to whisper to Xannes. “And Sense has said you’re such a softie when it comes to kids. Before you can do anything to me, I could do whatever I want to that robot. I could create a fun little feedback loop and break them like that. And you couldn’t do anything about it because you decided NPG is better to protect, hmm?”

Xannes wasn’t sure what to say that wouldn’t cause some problem, so he just glared. Grifter’s evil smile quickly turned to one that was much sweeter, and he pulled Grifect over, letting the child talk to Xannes. “Hi Mistew Xannes! Awe uwu weawwy the best hackew evew?”

“I… am known as the best hacker, yes.” Xannes gritted out after another smirk from Grifter.

“Wow! Thawt's so coow! Cawn uwu teach me how tuwu duwu stuff wike thawt?”

“Don’t you want to play with… whatever Jrum would be considered to you? Cousin or some shit?”

“Yeah! But cawn uwu teach me watew?”

“Yeah yeah, whatever.” Xannes growled, rolling his eyes. Grifect went back over to Jrum and Grifter tried pushing Sefter to play as well, but the older sibling refused to join in.

“Hmm, it looks like Sefter doesn’t want to play. I guess I should take him back to Prof. Sense, you can watch Grifect, right dear?” The evil scientist nodded and Grifter gave him a kiss. “Now Grifect, remember what I told you.”

“I wemembew!” The young bot replied, getting a pat on his head from his dad. Grifter left with Sefter after that, but Grian and Mumbo watcher where they had been.

“You’ve got a bad feeling about that too, right?”

Mumbo nodded. “After what we’ve heard about him, of course I do.”

.

.

.

Sefter twirled a sword in one hand while holding an axe in the other. Behind him, Tommy was tied up and stuffed in a large chest, muffled sounds being the only thing to escape the box. 

On the other side of the room, Grifter dragged Grum along, who was doing his best to resist. “P-please. I d-don’t w-want to g-go.”

“I don’t care! I need you for this, so you’re coming with me. No one will even notice!”

“N-no. I w-want to s-stay with T-Tommy. P-Please!”

“Stop complaining or I’ll rewire you for what I need. I’m sure it can’t be much worse than a lobotomy.” Grifter threatened in a cheerful voice. “Now let’s go!”

Grum was scared by the threat and then stopped resisting. Grifter found it much easier to move the robot now, though the screen changing to a smiley face confused him. He hefted the bot onto his shoulder, quickly sent a message to Grifect, and then they were gone.

The_Grifter left the world

Sefter left the world

The_Grifter joined the world

Grumbot_System joined the world

When they arrived in the SMP, Grumbot jumped off of Grifter’s shoulder and pulled out a sword. “Alright, I’m guessing that means you can also find Theseus from here, right?”

“Theseus is likely to be with the admin. The admin also has a needed item. That item must be retrieved.”

“Good.” Grifter smiled. “Take us there!”

Grumbot hesitated, buffering for a few moments. “Console commands have been disabled. Locating Theseus is not available. Reinstate programs before trying again.”

“Ugh, well how do I do that?” Grifter huffed, smiled gone. 

Coordinates appeared on Grumbot’s face for a few moments before it spoke again. “If it has not been moved, those should be the coordinates. There will be people around it.”

“And they know my ‘good’ copy?” Grifter asked, using air quotes.

“Correct.”

Grifter sighed and pulled on his new outfit, replacing it with a standard red sweater. He cleaned up his hair a bit, resisting the urge to mess it up again and then showed himself off. “How do I look?”

“You look like bzzt.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Grifter asked. Had the robot just censored a word. “I look like what?!”

“Was that not the goal? To look like bzzt? You did change into what looks like bzzt sweater.”

Grifter calmed down. “Oh, you were trying to say Grian’s name hmm? And people say I’m the bad one. He won’t let you say his name.”

“Incorrect. That is a recent addition as protection against the Admin and Dream.”

That got Grifter’s attention. “Oh really? So it’s something you’re doing on purpose?”

“Also incorrect. It has not been turned off and knowledge about the program is recent. It also cannot currently be turned off.” Grumbot explained in a deadpan voice, starting to walk to the quartz mansion, leaving Grifter to follow behind.

“Well now I’m curious. Why can’t you turn it off?”

“Another component controls that program.”

“Hmm, I see.” The helsmit nodded. “So, where are we headed?” He paused as Grumbot pointed to a building in the distance, far enough that Grifter needed to squint. “Over there? Pfft, why walk. I can get us there quicker.”

He grabbed Grumbot, and greenish magic swirled around them, teleporting them next to the building. “If you are attempting to mimic bzzt, that is not helpful for the image.”

“Pfft, it’s fine. No one saw. And if they did, I would deal with it. Now let’s go inside. I already know what I’m going with. Oh, and you better play along, or else.”

Grumbot nodded, making Grifter frown about that fact that it didn’t seem even a little scared from his threat. The helsmit picked Grumbot up before walking into the building, putting on a smile. “Hey, we’re back. Mumbo’s still back in Hermitcraft with Jrum keeping Tommy company.”

“Did you not figure out how to help him out? His body’s still here and obviously he didn’t come with you.” Philza spoke, having returned and Techno gone once again.

The helsmit didn’t need to worry about figuring out an answer because Grumbot quickly answered. “The revival process for those from this world requires an extra step in the form of an item that the admin was in possession of. He will need to be found.”

Those there glanced at each other, which obviously didn’t mean anything good. “What’s wrong?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. Fundy held out his communicator, letting Grifter look at it before showing Grumbot. Grifter held in a smile when he saw that Theseus was here, and it looked like his old admin was here too. The errored message was interesting though.

“Obviously it isn’t good news. Dream was bad enough, I don’t want to see what an evil version of him is like. Unless of course it’s an opposite version and he’s nicer.” Phil spoke again.

“From what I’ve heard? He’s not really that nice.” Grifter replied. Not nice to most people that is, at the very least. But he wondered if this Nightmare person would want to be on the good side of a Listener. In fact, he had already lost his server, hadn’t he? So what more could he possibly lose from some sort of partnership. “And while it probably isn’t a good idea to go near him, it looks like we’ll have to.”

“I’m not sure how long it would take to gather people up to help with that.” The hardcore player said. “A lot of people are still injured from the banquet and-”

Grifter cut Philza off. Grian would probably be concerned for his faaamily~. Ugh. “I’m sure I can do fine on my own. Even an admin can’t do much against a Watcher. And while extra help would be nice, you getting close could just end up being more harm than good if you end up in the crossfire. I don’t want to need to revive anyone else just trying to get this thing.”

“He will also be getting some assistance already.” Grumbot spoke up, and Grifter held in the urge to roll his eyes. 

“I’m not sure that’s the best idea.” Grifter tried his best to sound genuine. He’s pretty sure calling the robot by its name would be more effective, but to be completely honest, he had forgotten it at this point.

“There is to be no discussion on this matter. You will be getting assistance.” Grumbot replied, pulling out an axe. “And the sooner travel is started towards the new admin, the better.”

Grifter looked over the people in the room. Obviously getting Philza to look after the robot wouldn’t be a good idea. Even if he wasn’t like his own dad, the helsmit was sure he would be equally as experienced. The demon was off the table too. No way the robot would escape from that. The enderman thing could just teleport around.The fox hybrid might also be too quick on the draw, though he did look young. But no, the fluffy haired boy with little nubs of horns poking out, he seemed like the best option.  He even already had a kid attached at his leg, so adding another would make things tougher on him.

Grifter took Grumbot over to Tubbo and put the robot in the teen’s arms. “Here, try to keep him occupied. I’m sure those two could even play together.” Though Grumbot didn’t react, it looked like the ziglin liked that idea, making it even more likely for the teen to respond positively. And that he did.

The helsmit sent a little wink to Grumbot before giving it a hug and leaving the building. As soon as he was outside, Grifter leaned against a wall and waited for the robot to come out. In a few seconds, there was a commotion from inside and then Grumbot rushed out of the building. Grifter immediately pulled the robot into his arms and teleported them away before anyone could follow outside. “I’m hoping you got what you needed?”

“That could not be obtained.”

“Well then what the fuck was all that noise?”

“Attempting to reconnect programs followed by a necessary escape.”

“Ugh, well I’m sure everyone’s out looking for you now. I’ll take us back and you can do whatever the hell you need to.”

“That would be a good idea.”

Grifter teleported them back. The Fox hybrid unfortunately stayed behind, but the helsmit quickly bashed him over the head, letting him fall to the floor unconscious. “Hmm, I think I could have gone a little harder without killing him. Normally there’s more blood. Maybe I’m just out of practice?”

Grumbot didn’t respond to the banter, just staring at the replacement console. It didn’t need all the programs, but it would be so easy to just add them all back. Its arm reached to plug itself in, but the other arm’s hand stopped the first. Its screen flickered for a moment, and then it released its arm and plugged in. Just a copy of the coordinated program. That’s all that was needed.

When Grumbot unplugged again, Grifter picked it up. “I’m guessing that means you’re ready. Where are we headed to?”

Coordinates appeared on Grumbot’s screen and Grifter smiled before teleporting them there. They reappeared in a large field of snow, the helsmit glad he had changed back into a sweater. “You’re not going to freeze in this, right?”

“Correct.”

Grifter nodded and then looked around. “I’m not seeing them. Are you sure these are the right coordinates?”

“The coordinates were altered slightly based on movement, positioning and terrain. They will be four chunks in that direction in a number of ticks.” Grumbot answered, pointing towards a hill.

“Alright, sounds good enough!” Grifter shrugged and then started dragging Grumbot along in the pointed direction. When they reached the top of the hill, the helsmit looked around, smiling when he saw the people he was looking for. Theseus was following behind what was presumably Nightmare. Then the helsmit’s gaze drifted to a few blocks behind them and the extra set of footprints following the pair. It looked like someone was using an invisibility potion.

Grifter pulled out a bow and arrow, attaching his signature TNT to the end of his arrow, and then fired it so it would land in front of the pair. Not enough to hurt either of them, but enough to startle them at the very least.

When it exploded, Grifter teleported closer, leaving Grumbot behind. “Hi there. I don’t really want you going much further.”

“Who the hell are you?” Nightmare spoke as Theseus glared.

“Mmm… I’m sure you’ve heard of me. I’m a Listener. Grifter to be precise. I’m sure Theseus has talked about his much better older brother. If not, well I guess he’s just more of a little shit than I thought.”

“Nope, he never mentioned you. But I’ve heard of your kind.”

“Aww, that’s too bad.” Grifter pouted, pulling back another arrow and firing it at the invisible figure. “Anyway, nasty tail you’ve got there.”

Nightmare and Theseus turned around to see an arrow floating in midair, footprints being created in the snow with nothing visible making them. Immediately the invisible figure was pulling armor on, ready to fight. “Thanks for the tip.”

“Anytime! Anyway, I need Theseus. Apparently Dadza really likes him still and is upset he’s gone. I wouldn’t do anything, but he kinda cursed someone that I actually care about, so if I don’t do this, it’ll end badly for me.”

“Well tell him Theseus is staying with me. There’s still some training he never finished.”

Grifter’s eyes lit up briefly and the implications, but he still frowned. “Can I at least have him long enough to take back to Dadza? It’ll take five minutes, ten tops. If he doesn’t let me bring bitch boy back, I can just try killing him.”

“Try killing death?” Nightmare asked, sounding skeptical.

Grifter nodded. “Yeah, we’re pretty sure I’m the only one who can actually do it. It’s why people really prefer being on my side.” The helsmit’s smile shifted to something darker. “Which is why you should probably… you know… Listen. Besides, being on my side has plenty of perks!”

Grifter couldn’t see Nightmare’s expression because of his mask, but eventually he nodded. “Fine. But you better be back before those ten minutes.”

Grifter nodded, giving a beaming smile before grabbing Theseus and disappearing. Nightmare put his arms behind his head, acting bored, before pulling out an axe and shield at the last second, blocking an attack. “I know you’re still here idiot.”

The invisible figure didn’t respond, so Nightmare just threw their axe at the person, the blade digging into the armor, deep enough to break through it. “I guess the durability was low.” Was all Nightmare said as he popped his arm back into place, having dislocated from the amount of force he used in the attack. “So, got a na-” Nightmare continued before being cut off as he was grabbed from behind.

“You are in the possession of a needed item. It must be handed over.”

“And what are you supposed to be?”

Grumbot buffered for a moment before answering. “Console. The admin used a console for various jobs before he was taken away and replaced by you. You likely still have an Item needed for the revival process of this world in your possession. The surrendering of that item would be appreciated.”

Nightmare kicked Grumbot away. “Not a chance.” He then pulled out a sword, hitting away the invisible figure. “Not like I can do it with this person fighting me.”

“Then they will be eliminated.” Grumbot replied, booting up its combat program. It pulled out a sword, ready to attack, but then was pushed to the ground.

“Nah, you might be useful later. Get out of the way.” Nightmare said before pulling out a trident and stabbing it into the ground, impaling Grumbot’s arm and nailing it to the ground.

As Nightmare and the invisible person fought, Grumbot looked at the trident. Fortunately it only injured one arm, and as a robot, it was ambidextrous. It pulled the trident out and held it in its hand. With the combat program active, Grumbot angled the throw, adjusting for movement from the other combat, and then threw the weapon.

In a moment, Nightmare was the one stuck to the ground. The invisible person tried to take advantage of the situation, but Grumbot managed to push them aside. The face flickered and then changed to its normal self, though even then it still flickered a bit. “Look, I’m just after my book. Give it here and you can be on your way.”

No one moved, Nightmare wasn’t even struggling, so Grum pressed his foot into Nightmare’s chest. “Give it up, or we could just stay here.”

“Who are you?”

“I think you know.”

There was quiet for a bit, but then Nightmare pulled out a book. “Fine, but I’ll be getting answers.”

“No you won’t.” And Grum pulled the trident out again before smashing it down on Nightmare’s face, shattering the mask he wore before the body disappeared into a cloud of smoke. Immediately Grum closed his combat program and curled into a ball. He started crying at what had just happened, everything quickly catching up with him. But the danger was gone now, right?

The sound of armor moving drew Grum’s attention to the now formerly invisible person, the piglin now looking down at Grum. The bot immediately regretted closing his combat program and tried to boot it up again, shakily drawing his sword. He didn’t want to die again, especially now he had the- the book! Grum dropped his sword and grabbed the book, shoving it into one of his extra inventory slots. It was just in time too as Techno grabbed him.

“D-d-don’t kuh-kill m-me ple-please!” Grum stuttered out. He was lifted up, which he thought was a curious way to kill him, but he also didn’t expect fireworks as a weapon, so anything was on the table with him. 

Instead, Techno just moved Grum onto his back before leaning down and grabbing the dropped sword. “Already made the mistake of killing you once. Besides, you’ll get rid of my ghost problem.” And then he started walking. Grum was still a bit scared of getting killed, thinking the piglin could be lying, but he was also tired. He was glad he still had the trident, which was channeling at the very least, so he wouldn’t necessarily need his charger, but conserving power would be good right now, so he went to sleep.

[jasmine-tea-latte]

(Some of) My Favorite Zutara fics

Warning, looong post ahead!

Zutara Fanworks Appreciation Week snuck up on me, so sadly I haven’t had time to properly contribute anything. I’d love to participate next year or maybe even before then (I play by my own rules, folks!)

Still, though. I wanted to at the very least pay tribute to some of my all-time favorite Zutara fanfics that I’ve enjoyed and have inspired me over the years.

(Click here for my post on Self-Love Saturday, where I shamelessly promote my series The Phoenix and the Dragon and share a bit of backstory behind how it came to be in the first place.)

I’ve shipped Zutara ever since Fall 2006, and I have been fortunate to read so many excellent fanfics since then.

Some have made me laugh, others made me sob, others straight up made my heart burn like it was shot full of lightning:

So in honor of @zkfanworkweek​, below are 13 of my favorite Zutara fanfics, in no particular order:

~*~*~

Rated G(eneral)/T(een)

Engulfed by Luaburachid

Zuko finds himself engulfed by love.

A sweet one-shot of our favorite firebender discovering how deep his feelings are for a certain waterbender. It’s just pure fluff and always brings a smile to my face.

 we hold our hearts in silence by psychedelic_aya

Seventy years later, Korra tries to figure out Zuko and Katara.

Oh, this one is so bittersweet but oh so good. It alternates between flashbacks and Korra’s POV watching an older Zuko and Katara interact. Just… ugh. My heart.

 Day 6: Found by SooperSara

When Sokka comes up with an idea to get rid of Joo Dee, Katara finds herself in the Lower Ring of Ba Sing Se with a tea server she did not expect to meet.

I love a good Jasmine Dragon AU where Katara / the Gaang actually interacts with Zuko while he’s undercover as Lee from the tea shop instead of what happened in “The Guru.” This is so much fun to read, and my only complaint is that it’s not longer.

 Celestial by SooperSara

An unexpected dip into the koi pond at the North Pole brings Zuko in contact with the spirits and grants him insight to his destiny. A destiny he isn’t sure he wants.

Another by the talented SooperSara! Actually, you should check out all of her stuff. It’s all so good, and I absolutely adore this one. It’s pretty canon-compliant and the ending… oh, the ending makes me tearbend. Ma’am, I’m still weepy.

 this little fuse we lit made something in you by SecondStarOnTheLeft

There's a secret door in the wall of Katara's room. Things go a little further than planned, once she opens it.

What happens when Katara discovers a secret tunnel (secret, secret, secret tunnel, yeah!) that leads directly to the Fire Lord’s bedroom? Reading this fic is like settling down to drink a hot cup of Iroh’s tea – it’s soothing, sweet, and thoroughly warms the soul.  

 Dancing in the Dark by damagectrl

Post-Season 2 AU: While in Ba Sing Se, Katara and Toph hear a rumor about two tea servers in the lower tiers of Ba Sing Se and sneak away go to investigate only to have their suspicions confirmed. On her personal time, Katara tries to teach herself to dance and fails so badly, a masked man takes pity on her to try to help.

This is one most OGs will probably remember. It’s also one of the first ZK fics I ever read, back when I was a wee lil bb Zutarian! It was originally posted in Oct. 2006 and takes place between “Appa’s Lost Days” and “Lake Laogai.” One of my all-time favorite Bluetara AND Jasmine Dragon AUs. Heck, all of damagectrl’s works are fantastic reads, for that matter. I highly recommend checking them out, especially this classic.

 such selfish prayers by andromeda3116

Katara's ambition, so long set aside for the good of others, breaks free and sets fire to her soul. Or, Katara has a vision of her canon future, casts it aside, and becomes a world-changing politician instead.

There’s a reason why this fic is one of the highest rated on AO3, if not THE highest. It does right by Katara and gives her the ending she deserves. 10/10 would recommend.

 better than things dreamed of in the forest by catie_writes_things (SERIES)

As a child, Bumi knew: his mother was a waterbender, his father was an airbender, and he was a firebender. Something about these facts did not add up, but it would take him a long time to understand.

Hands down, one of the most heartbreaking fics / series I’ve ever read. The author describes this as the adultery fic for people who hate adultery fics, and it certainly packs an emotional punch in the gut. Personally, I’m not one for the “Zuko and Katara have an affair while she’s with Aang” fics in general, but this one examines the fallout caused by a single night of passion and all of the consequences that stem from it, especially how the ripple effect of their choices impacts everyone. Even though it breaks my heart all over again every time I reread it, I can’t recommend it highly enough. 

  ~*~*~

(More fics, several with high ratings, are listed below the cut)

Rated M(ature)/E(xplicit)

Moonlight and Sunshadow by GrapefruitTwostep

The dragon offered Katara a deal: protection for her family and tribe if she lived with it for a year and a day. And she said yes. Because what other way was there to save her people? But there was more to the dragon than Katara bargained for. An "East of the Sun, West of the Moon" retelling.

A fairy tale AU in which Zuko is cursed to live as a dragon and Katara is certainly no damsel in distress. You’ve probably heard some version of the original fairy tale before that this fic is inspired by, and it’s such a delight to read.

 The Blackfish and the Dragon by ama

Katara grew up in the Southern Water Tribe under the tutelage of Hama, the only waterbender ever to have escaped Fire Nation captivity. When Zuko arrives at the South Pole, seeking the Avatar, they are more than ready to defend him. Then one day, the Southern Water Tribe receives a petition for peace, and a proposal of marriage.

One of the best arranged marriage AUs I’ve come across. Iroh is crowned Fire Lord after defeating Ozai, and Katara must find some way to peacefully coexist with her hotheaded new husband as she also finds a place for herself in the Fire Nation.

 Confused by thispieceofwork

Zuko stood. "You told Aang you were confused. Are you confused because of me?" Katara was silent, arms crossed in front of her. "Don't make me answer that."

Starts during “The Ember Island Players” where Zuko overhears Aang and Katara’s private conversation on the balcony. This is another fic that will shatter your heart into a million pieces but it’s oh so worth it in the end.

 A Heated Exchange by Smediterranea (SERIES)

Katara had not considered herself to be someone who would have earth-shattering sex with a guy whose name she didn’t even know. But here she was, certain that she had never made a better decision in her life.

An AU two-part series of Katara getting familiar with a certain handsome guy who lives down the hall in her college dorm. It’s funny, cute, and cuddling while watching Planet Earth has never been hotter.

 Bonus day: Tea Shop by cincilin

"Hello and welcome to the Jasmine Dragon. Today's special is—" he cut himself of with a sharp intake of breath, at the same moment that Katara placed the voice and looked up.

'He has hair.' was her first thought. Then the rest of her brain caught up with her and she started to get up, sending Momo scrambling to hide under the table. Season 2 AU, during "The Guru."

I told y’all, I *LOVE* a good Jasmine Dragon AU fic, and this one-shot checks all the boxes: heart-to-heart conversations? Witty dialogue and banter? Bending match that turns into a makeout and something steamier? It’s got it all.

~*~*~

This was only going to be a list of maybe 5-7fic recs, but well… oops. I also kept the above list to completed works only, just because this post is already long enough.

Several of my other favorites that get honorable mention include:

Thinking Out Loud (WIP)

The Summit (WIP)

Sparrowkeet (Series)

Purr

The Nature of the Blue Spirit

Rhythm of the Rain

Fault Lines

Clarity

Seriously, there are just SO MANY good Zutara fics out there. I had to cut myself off from adding even more, because I could go on and on and on. Much like Admiral Zhao, I have no. self. control. 

I love you all, my fellow Zutarians ❤️💙💜 Mwah! Happy ZFAW! 

[liquor-and-intellect]

PREHISTORIC

Summary: Talia is a singer inspired by the man who broke her heart. The man who left her to pursue his career in the music industry without a second thought. The man who happens to be Harry Styles and is paying her show a visit. 

A/N: this is based off of Prehistoric by Now, Now. I’ve had this idea floating around in my head for YEARS and it feels so lovely getting it out. Enjoy:)

“Tal, we’re up in five.”

I paused my movements of bouncing my foot up and down as I relaxed back in the cold metal chair backstage. It stunk of stale cigarettes within this whole shitty venue.

I nodded toward Roman. “Got it,” I yelled back with a toothy smile.

He was about to retreat out of the room but paused in the doorway to give me a last glance—a glance I knew all too well. He gave me this look quite frequently, as if I had hung the stars in the sky. He was my biggest fan— I knew that without a doubt. Every night, every venue he cheered me on from behind the bass of his drum set. I could always feel his eyes on me as I performed.

I stood up and rolled my shoulders, reminding myself that no matter how the environment of the venue looked, I would step on that stage and be the most authentic version of myself.  There was no time to pretend to adapt to the people around me, I had learned that the hard way.

It was always difficult to not tone my performance down if the crowd just wasn’t into it. Sometimes, we played in front of statues. Other times, it was magnetic and a hit of the right atmosphere was like shooting the perfect drug into my veins—addicting and leaving me wanting more. I always came back for the chance of that high.

I had been writing for years, singing and beating on a piano for even more. The ride of my music career began with the only man I had every loved. He encouraged me to write, gushed over my vulnerable lyrics and allowed me to bleed out onto the pages of journals without a second thought. We would be up all night, playing until our fingers blistered over and I swore my joints were withering away with the night hours.

His voice was the only one that would leave me with chills every time it harmonized with my own.

He had been in the midst of chasing his own career as well during our three years together. When it took off, he left. Not a cold cut split but one that took years to unravel us from one another. Midnight calls and drunk confessions left toxins in my bloodstream. I would never be able to move on if we hadn’t cut off contact, I’m sure I’d still be in the revolving door of his control over me.

That had been years ago…

And yet I still thought of him every time I warmed up my vocal cords.

It also was hard not to think of him as his song echoed over the speakers of the club we were playing in, biding time with the audience as my band got ready to play. The catchy chorus—which I had to admit was mesmerizing—asked the listener if they knew who they were in such a haunting repetition that it raised the hairs on my arms.

He was living it big somewhere—never once mentioning my name or my writings that motivated him to pursue his dreams.

And here I was still playing in shitty bars.

I walked toward the curtain, Roman waiting for me with a smile on his face, drumsticks in his hand.

“You look gorgeous,” he whispered.

I dressed eccentrically when I performed. Letting my artistic vision bleed its way into my style. Tonight, my outfit of choice was a Fashion Nova glittery mesh shirt with bell-shaped sleeves over a chrome bralette.

I nodded in his direction, the pre-performance jitters rendering me unable to give a proper response, as the lights in the bar dimmed and we walked on stage.

This was one of our larger venues, a local take of the House of Blues. I was pleasantly surprised when I noticed a few loyal fans standing in front of the stage, smiles and phones ready. The crowd was decently sized tonight.

My face lit up and I hoped this rush was just as good as the last one. “One…two…One, two, three, four!” I yelled as the electric guitar started up and the lights faded in, I grabbed the microphone and launched into our opener, a fast-paced indie ballad that gave people a glimpse of what our music was like.

The audience was wonderful, bobbing along and swaying to the beat. I even saw a few jumping up and down to Roman’s drumstick hitting the surface of the instrument. Being on the stage was electric… I lost myself within the music, letting my raspy voice ease itself over the lyrics, bouncing around the stage in my buckled boots like I had never felt dancing before.

My whole body was buzzing with electricity as we finished our second song and I prepared myself for the one that always pulled at my heart strings.

I used to give a prelude to this one, let the microphone rest against my mouth as I told the crowd what it was about, why I wrote it and allowed anyone who was listening the opportunity to see how much this person still effected my every thought. I didn’t do that anymore… he didn’t deserve it.

I sang instead to the rhythmic beat that Roman provided. Letting the words pulse through my skull.

“I know this will mess things up tonight

But God it feels so good to close my eyes.

I’ll say I’ve been trying to move on

We both know I’m not.”

I threw my head back as the beat hit and let my body drag me away from the mic stand for a momentary breath. I thought of the green eyes that had haunted my dreams when I wrote this song. I thought of shared cigarette smoke over music sheets and a slow decay of a relationship that tore me apart from the inside out.

“It may be different now, but the pattern won’t wash out

Covers up our eyes, leaves us with knots and severed ties

We follow new lines.”

I hugged the microphone between my palms as I let my voice rasp its way to the audience’s waiting ears. Harry and I had been lying in bed when the thought of this song came to my mind with our backs to each other. I was too afraid to turnaround. Too prideful to ask what would become of us if he got his record deal and had to move to L.A. I had felt his distance before I could physically put words to it.

I finally allowed myself to look up to the audience as I sang this next part. My heart sinking as I met eyes with the last person I expected to see. In an effort to stop my racing heart, I tightly shut my eyes.  

“I would trade this sleep for you in a heartbeat…

But this weather will not lift

Leaves us shouting into cliffs, without an echo…”

Reopening them, I was met with his steady gaze, confirming to myself that it was not a hallucination.

“Each day you come closer

So close I can almost feel your breath

On my shoulders.”

I didn’t know how to look away from him and look to someone else—and by the look on his face, he noticed.

Tearing the mic from its stand, I turned to face Roman, doing a full circle before forcing myself to walk to the edge of the stage and look into the opposite corner of the bar.

“But I know if I turn around…” The words were now truer than they had ever been. “you might run away again.”

The guitar and drums hit at once, the song rising to its peak as I let my shoulders drop with the beat.

“Stuck like those prehistoric mammoths in the ice

Thaw me out and I won’t close my eyes.”

Even though I shut my eyes, I could still feel his presence within the room as if he was standing a foot from me. I thought of how I had desperately prayed to any god that might have heard me for him to turn around and face me under that white duvet every night. If he would just turn around, I would forget why I was hurting, I would forget why I was questioning everything I thought I knew. I would fight sleep and stay up to the ends of the night if it meant keeping him with me.

“Stuck like those prehistoric mammoths in the ice

Thaw me out and I won’t go to sleep tonight.”

The guitar player continued his rift and I forced myself to face away from the crowd as the song came to an end and cheers erupted.

I put on a brave face, continuing with two of my original songs and a cover. I avoided the right side of the bar where Harry stood concealed in a jacket with a hood pulled up, nursing something in a shorter glass—if he was anything like he used to be, it would be whiskey.

The few times I turned around and met eyes with Roman, he would shoot an eyebrow up, noticing the rigidness in my dancing. The guitar and bass players were not as in tune with me as he was, continuing to strum along their instruments with the same glee they always had.

The last guitar note held in the air as I finished my last song. Breathless in the microphone, I yelled, “I’m Talia and thank you for having us tonight!” I kissed both of my hands and raised them above my head in a final goodbye, risking a glance to the right side of the bar where a previously filled stool now sat empty. There was a moment of disappointment in my chest before walking off the stage, letting the boys finish out their final notes on their instruments.

It wasn’t until I hit the last step on the stairs backstage that I let my true panic take hold of me. What the hell was he doing here?

I racked my brain of all the scenarios that have landed him in this bar by any form of logic I could muster and none of them made any sense. He was big shot now. Hosting Saturday Night Live and announcing world tours. Why would he be in this shitty venue?

My heels clicked as I rounded the corner into the common area backstage and came to a full halt at the man now standing in front of me.

He had the same green eyes… but everything else was drastically different. His hair was parted down the middle, his shoulders pulled back and resting with confidence. His hands were in his pockets, but I still could see the elaborate rings that adorned each finger. Although he wore a black sweatshirt, there was an ornate Gucci logo on the front—which I knew to cost more than we got paid tonight.

I swallowed the biggest lump in my throat, suddenly feeling exposed in my shorts and bralette.

“You were…” His voice sounded the same—deep, long and melodic. “amazing out there. So magnetic.”

Three years ago, I would have bent over backwards for a compliment like that.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, I didn’t want to waste time with small talk. He disrupted my night—my life—and I deserved to know why.

He took in a deep breath and sighed, having prepared himself for my brashness. “Uh… well. I was in town and heard you were playing.”

“Bullshit.” I crossed my arms.

He pursed his lips. “What do you want me to say?”

“The truth.”

“I wanted to see you.”

My heart—reverting back to its natural state—fluttered within my chest. Even after all these years, he still had the power to do that to me. This was why our break had to be a cold, clean cut. My body always turned to a vulnerable mush when he was round.

There was noise behind me as the boys came down the stairs, laughing in their giddy way they did post-show. They stopped dead in their tracts as they noticed the star in front of me.

“Woah, is that Harry Styles?” David, the bass player, asked.

Harry smiled in their direction, walking forward to shake their hands, forever a gentleman. “You all did amazing tonight. Great job.”

I could feel Roman’s gaze on my stiff posture and defensive stance as he attempted to connect the dots in his head. “Tal, you okay?” he whispered to me, nudging my elbow with his hand.

Harry’s eyes snapped to Roman, assessing him in a way he hadn’t done previously. Jealousy?

“Yeah, I’m great. Just about to leave,” I spun on my heel and directed myself to the dressing room.

“But we have a guest!” David yelled.

Harry cleared his throat. “Actually,” he announced to get my attention. “I wanted to ask your band something, Talia.”

The sound of my name from his mouth was enough for my head to whip around in a beat.  

“I need an opener for the American leg of my tour next year-“

“What the fuck, Harry. You are not about to ask me this,” I cut him off, the anger from years ago fighting its way out to finally have release.

“- I want to ask you and your band to open… for me,” he finished, eyes frozen on me. Had he gone mad? Had he forgotten the past 5 years? How he left me in the dust of his career when someone besides me showed interest in his talent.

I could feel the confusion of the boys on the other side of the room as they eyed Harry and I.

“Well,” David began. “I, for one, think that opening for Harry fucking Styles would be absolutely amazing.”

“Not happening,” I shot back.

Aiden held his hands up. “Talia, this is the big break you’ve been talking about. Why wouldn’t we take it?”

I looked back to Harry, letting all the hurt and venom I could gather lace my words. “Because he could have done this fucking years ago.”

Harry shook his head. “Tal, you know I couldn’t—”

“Don’t call me that.”

“The label told me it was all or nothing,” he continued. “and I didn’t argue. I didn’t know how. I was twenty years old.”

I nodded. “Yeah… well now I’m twenty three and there’s no way in fucking hell you can just waltz in here-“

“Okay,” Roman interjected, stepping between Harry and I. He took a moment to let our eyes meet before he lowered his hands, knowing he gained my attention. “let’s take a deep breath and maybe have this conversation somewhere else.”

Harry nodded as if it had been his own fucking idea.

I wanted to explode even more at the idea of Roman telling me to calm down but realized that causing a scene in a building that is paying us to be here might not be the best idea.

In defeat, I took a deep breath. “I’m going to get some air,” I mumbled.

“I’ll go with you,” Roman interjected.

I held up my hand, a silent plea for him to leave me alone as I made my way out the door that lead to the alleyway.

My heart was still racing from the stage and now throwing in Harry was like forcing my body into fight or flight mode. I had envisioned the day I would run into him so many times that I never was aware that I would just be filled with anger when I saw his face again. I thought I’d be over it by now. Passive even.

I grabbed a cigarette and placed it between my lips, flicking the lighter a few times with my thumb before the spark showed itself. Taking a deep draw, I willed the nicotine to ignite my lungs with every type of chemical it had. I wanted it to take me far from here.

A scuff of a boot, then a familiar melodic voice.

“I didn’t know you were still smoking.”

I didn’t even bother to look at Harry as I let the smoke lift itself out of my mouth and into the night sky. “I wasn’t until three minutes ago.”

A gulp. I wondered if his Adam’s apply bobbed when he did that. “I stress you out that much?”

In a moment of vulnerability, a lapse of judgement, I shook my head. “No,” I murmured, taking another draw of my cigarette. “you fucking terrify me.” It was true. I was so fucking scared of the way my body was drawn to his, even after all the shit he’s done. I was scared that he was going to up and leave with no goodbye again and I’d be left in the dust of all the amazing things he was going to accomplish without me.

Harry didn’t ask me to elaborate, probably because he felt he was pushing his luck by just standing out here with me. Maybe because he already knew why I was scared. In a hopeless way, I wondered if he was scared to.

He took a step closer to me while I kept my gaze focused on the cracks in the bricks across from us. “Look,” he said hesitantly. “I want to talk to you. I want you let all of the frustration and anger you’ve felt for the last years out on me. I deserve it… and you deserve for me to hear every single feeling you’ve experienced.”

I threw my cigarette to the ground and scuffed it into the pavement with my booth.

“I don’t want you to have to do this here,” he continued. “I’m staying at the hotel off 4th. Room 310. I’m here until tomorrow.”

Harry paused for a moment, half expecting me to give him an answer now. But he knew me well enough to know that my silence meant contemplation—and that’s the best thing he could hope for in that moment.

I turned to catch a glimpse of him, but all I could see was his back as the door shut softly behind him. Leaving me once again with so many unsaid words.

PART TWO? Let me know!

[best1shot]

Favs of Bucky Barnes

Bucky’s day off 

Tantalus’ fruit

Bad girl - smut

Trust - she panics the day she finds him in te bathroom with scissors in his hands and fresly cut hair in a soft pile on the floor, innocently sandwiched between his bare feet

Panic - two little texts send yout heart into a frenzy, and when the super soldier responsible for them doesn’t reply, you just hope he’s still alive for him to hear exactly what you think of him

You made a list? - bucky finds a list you made

Apricity - bucky comes to you for comfort after a hard mission, but he doesn’t feel like he deserves you

“Why is she wearing my hoodie?” - bucky tries to figure out the reason behind his missing hoodie one day, relishing in the idea tha might be a win-win for both of you... but wha might that lead to?

Not a monster - bucky ends up teaching a class of seconds graders about WWII

Once a snap - thanos snapped and your world feel apart. now, five years later everything has been fixed but you

Bucky being soft - super soldier raised his voice around you and boy... he feels bad about it

Morning run - bucky likes reader and decides to join her and sam on a run

Pitching a tent - you and the team go on a camping trip together and you get stuck sharing a tente with bucky

Tease filled mornin - a few short and small innocent kisses ultimately turn into a game of “who can tease who better”

Let me show you - bucky gives reader a “redo” on her first time, and takes her virginity / smut

Jealous - you and bucky are in a sex-only relationship, the only problem is you’re in love with him. your friends constantly remind you that you should be together, but after a while you give up

Baby - bucky and Y/N drift apart, and bucky can’t figure out why

Always the friend part 1 - you and bucky are good friends. you consider him one of yout bests! unfortunately for you, you have developed a crush on him. you are too scared to teel him, because you don’t want to ruin yout friendship

- Always the friend part 2

Just friends.. part 1 - you and bucky became fast friends when you first started with the avengers. what happens when bucky gets a girlfriend who is not okay with you relationship?

- Just friends.. part 2

Good girl - bucky and reader turn eachother on with pet names - smut

The mood - “come on. I just wanna feel you” “i’m noot in the mood for sex” “let me just put the tip in then” - smut

If you love me, why did you hurt me? FIC - you dated bucky for five wonderful years! you thought he was the one! then, without reason, he ends your relationship, and gets a new girlfriend two days later! while you are both avengers, you still have to see him, and his girlfriend

Bad Match FIC

I ran - a new addition to the avengers, everyonde seems to like you... everyone except bucky barnes

You’re mine - smut

Yours - a new girl joins the team, and gets a little too close to bucky for your linking - smut

Push-ups 

Benefits - you and bucky had been friends with benefits for a while, and of course someone catches feelings

Morning glory - spending the night at bucky’s for the first time has you very excited and a morning suprise really moves the relationship along 

Make me hum - “your tongue is disgustingly long” “it is. never had a woman complain” “you’re insufferable” - smut

He’s your dancing queen - bucky is a man-child about indulging your want to watch mamma mia for the hundredth time, and when you came early a few days later you are met with something unexpected

F&MU - smut

No clue - Y/N and bucky hate each other. nobody knows why. whenever someone asks, the pair just say “I have my reasons”. some think that something happend between them when bucky was in hiding. some think that bucky did something to Y/N when he was the winter soldier. some think that there’s no actual reason, they simly hate each other

Slow dancing in a burning room - Y/N knew that bucky had to leave someday but that didn’t mean that she was ready when the day came

Roses FIC - bucky tells Y/N he’s the winter soldier. the next day, hes’ taken by the government and that’s the last Y/N sees of him... until they cross paths again. but what if bucky doesn’t remember her?

Doctor me up

Bubbles

You are so annoying, baby

Close to you - bucky loves Y/N, he didn’t mean to snap at her

Kiss me slowly

Falling like the starts

Hard Place

May I ask - you and bucky broke up a few months ago. conveniently enough, he gests called ou to an undercover mission and you were spared from seeing him everywhere you went... until he gets back and suddenly all the feelings are back

Dates - bucky organises a date for you

Self care

Valentine’s day - “why should we express our love and act romantic on this day when you can be all year round?”

New hair

Disney and chill

Soft Bucky

Player - being pennys best friend and falling for bucky - smut

Riding - where you ride his thigh - smut

Miscommunication - bucky has an accident and you come to his aid

Undercover - you and bucky have to act as a couple during a mission

Sleep Deprivation - bucky’s nightmares are getting the best of him, you help distract him

Safety - bucky steps in when an argument with your boyfriend takes a turn

Coincidences - an overheart conversation exposes some true feelings

Educating bucky - bucky is trying to cath up on everything he has missed

Temperature control - temperatures in the compund rise, you nedd to find some way to cool down

Trouble - a mysterious man catches your eye at a tony stark party

Priorities - bucky worries about the effect his job is having on his family

Unexplained events - the day goes from bad to worse. then you receive some news that could make or break everything

The bet - thor brings some asgardian liquor to one of tony’s party and bucky makes a bet that he may regret

Scheduling errors - you and bucky are stuggling to find time for each other

Starting over - set after the end of endgame, bucky wans to start over, he just isn’t sure how

The morning after - after a night of birthday celebrations you wake in your own bed. but you’re not alone

Trapped - the team encourage you to play 7 minutes in heaven. 7 minutes turns into 7 hours

Rules of engagement - bucky proposes to you. you’ll accept on one condition

Testing the brakes - after an argument you just have to get away leaving bucky feeling lost

Dinner plans - your romantic dinner plans don’t quite go to plan

Something borrowed - you may have borrowed bucky’s favourite t-shirt without telling him, you need to return it before he finds out

Defining scars - after a month long mission you spend the night wrapped in your hasbands arms

First - first time saying “I love you”

Reunited - after being put in cryo until shuri could fix him, bucky is woken up and feeling more like himself. shuri needs to talk to bucky and takes the reader with her

Dog tags and storage units - two things in this world belong to bucky. his tags, and you - smut

45 - “what do you mean not yet? you can’t expect me not to cum when you’re fucking me so good!” - smut

1 - “let me show you why you should stay in bed”

Just hitched - at steve’s wedding, you findyou have an asigned seat next to the one and only bucky barnes, aka, the best man - smut

Changes - reader and bucky go out to dinner and get drunk, back home she decides to take charge in bed

It’s what you need - bucky knows that reader just needs to get it fucked out of her system - smut

Selfies PICS 

Stroking all day long -  bucky has a thing for reader, who is an avid swimmer. upon seeing her practice in tony’s pool, he gets turned on

Ready to comply, to you -  the winter soldier gets triggered to come out and play, but instead of taking orders from whoever set it off, bucky stays obedient to the reader

First time -  bucky and the reader had been dating for a while and he finds out she's a virgin

Shower -  sexy time in the shower with bucky after he worked out and he's all sweaty and he ran to the bathroom so he could press himself to your wet naked body instead of showering alone

BJ - a bj when bucky’s tryna get paperwork done 

Risk -  risky blowjob

Almost killed -  reader almost gets herself killed on a mission, and Bucky tries to stop her but she’s independent and stands up for herself

But -  “I love you, but stop talking”

Bite me -  “I’m fully capable of kicking your ass”

Hurt - “ what the hell were you thinking? you could have been hurt.”

You -  “you’re jealous.” “it’s always been you.”

Drunk - “how much did you have to drink?”

Stay -  “(name), open the door!” “stay. please.”

Cold -  “it’s freezing. come here.” + “I’ve loved you for years”

Make right -  reader sees something she shouldn’t, and hurt feelings ensue.

58/82 -  “come sit on my face, let me show you how much I missed you” “yeah, that’s it, baby, just like that”

82 - pulling hair kink

46,48,81 - “wanna see what I’m wearing underneath all this?” “I can’t wait to pu bruises all over that pretty skin” “is that a thong?”

5,47,93 - “you look good all soaking wet” “you deserve a reward for being so good today, what would you like it to be?” “it’s okay, honey, you can pull my hair as hard as you want while I’m between your legs”

6,12 - “are you sure that’s what you want? I could really hurt you” “you don’t have to be gentle with me, I don’t break easily”

How do you think a jealous Bucky would behave? 

Protective boyfriend Bucky

Bucky dealing with a guy trying to steal his girl would include?

Jealous bucky headcanons

Protetctive bucky

It’s cold, take my jacket

Tomorrow -  “you’re not leaving, are you?”

Cuddly -  reader is feeling down and bucky makes sure her hair gets washed, bringing an array of stories and suds

Keeper - you were never supposed to be more than the winter soldier’s plaything, but some bonds can’t be broken

Always knew -  you always knew in your heart steve didn’t belong to you. you just never imagined someone else did

Back 

A bid on bucky -  you spend thousands of dollars at a bachelor auction for bucky when you could’ve had him for free this entire time

Deserve -  bucky overhears that he doesn’t deserve the girl he loves and he agrees

Pressed together 

You make me feel -  you make me feel so young. you make me feel so spring has sprung. and every time I see you grin, I’m such a happy individual

Control - smut

Promise -  as soon as your fingers wrap around him, bucky takes in a sharp breath and his muscles go taut again. always ready to spring into action. fight or flight

22 -  “I can see you undressing me with your eyes”

8 -  “I love the way you taste”

9 -  “you can get rough with me; I won’t break”

3 -  “I can show you just how flexible I am”

15 -  “you’re the only person I wanted to be with tonight”

80,89 - “why did I marry you?” “it took a lot of convinving”

No touching -  bucky barnes vs. an idiot

Lazy morning -  lazy morning with bucky. she has a wet dream, and he wants to make it come true

83,84 - “you can’t eat solids, only liquids until thursday” “come on, baby, up to bed”

Crushes and spam accounts SOCIAL MEDIA - y/n and bucky are teammates and she finds herself falling for the blue-eyed soldier. unable to find an escape, she rants about her feelings about him on an anonymous spam account. harmless, right?

I wished on the moon for you -  after losing bucky, you were devastated. so when howard stark asks for volunteers for an experiment, you’re the first in lin

Help -  two years after you and bucky broke up, the team needs your help

Nightmare -  you’re not sleeping, and bucky notices

Sly as a fox SOCIAL MEDIA -  after the blip, the avengers continue on with business as usual.  but they soon find out that while they were away, someone took it upon themselves to do the job they left behind

Mais charmante SOCIAL MEDIA -  james needs something. more specifically, he needs someone.  someone he can take care of that’ll fill his daily quota of affection.  who better than a college student whose heart is too big for her own good?

I’ll be home for christimas -  bucky made a promise to his girl, and steve helps him keep it

I don’t need a roof -  bucky thinks he’s running out of time, and needs to make sure his girl knows she’s taken care

68 -  “let’s carve our initials into the tree”

125 -  “(name)?” - “yeah?” - “I’m gonna kiss you now.” - “okay”

69 -  “every time you touch me, I feel a little less broken”

The only one SOCIAL MEDIA -  you’re the head engineer of stark industries (and peter parker’s older sister) and close friends with the avengers. you’ve always had a crush on one james barnes, however what happens when someone from your past comes in right as bucky starts to reciprocate your feelings?

Charcoal Drawings SOCIAL MEDIA -  you are an art student and are forced to take a life drawing class which will include nude modeling. one little problem, the model is super fucking hot

Feelings you can’t deny SOCIAL MEDIA -  you love working with your brother and best friends. but what will happen when bucky visits the avengers and you can’t seem to stop embarrassing yourself?

Secrect confessions SOCIAL MEDIA -  after an unexpected break up with bucky, you change a few things. your hair, your number, even your schedule for the upcoming semester. but after weeks of dodging the topic, your roommates (MJ, peter and the twins) and your close friend natasha decide it’s time to help you move on

Sure, jan SOCIAL MEDIA -  while writing your college history paper on WWII, you decide to tweet your favorite avengers, steve rogers and bucky barnes, for help. they were also the most qualified. it’s not like they would actually reply, right?

Okay, but can I get more ice cream first? -  bucky takes care of you when you get your wisdom teeth removed

Here comes trouble - you were supposed to be dating peter parker. then can someone explain why the hell bucky is treating you better than your own boyfriend

I hate everybody SOCIAL MEDIA -  after spending the summer getting over your high school sweetheart, it’s time for new beginnings. what else is college for?

Mission report: laundry day -  you and bucky have been secretly dating for over a year, what will it finally take for the others to find out?

Not happening FIC -  an online dating site clearly makes a mistake when it matches you with the one person you cannot stand

Polyonymous SOCIAL MEDIA -  you met james on twitter three months ago, and you’ve talked everyday since. you really like him, and you don’t think you’ve met anyone like him. that is, until the fateful night that brings the avengers to you. you meet bucky barnes, and then you’re stuck choosing between two guys so alike you find yourself asking why they couldn’t be the same person

Something more FIC -  after a bad breakup you ask your best friend to take your virginity. it’s just friends with benefits. what could possibly go wrong?

All the blind dates SOCIAL MEDIA -  after finding out that your boyfriend was cheating on you, you agree to go a few blind dates to help you move on

Little lion man -  sent on an assignment back to 1943, you encounter a drastically different version of the man you know

Soldat - when a hydra agent finds a way to hack into FRIDAY’s system to trigger bucky into the winter soldier, he nearly kills you. in the aftermath, he can’t begin to find a way to forgive himself. not without your help

Not so sweet dreams are made of this -  sometimes, bucky’s nightmares get a bit too real. sometimes, they even become a reality

Drunk on you -  bucky has always been nervous around you. when he’s tasked with caring for you after a night of heavy drinking and suddenly you’re kissing him, bucky doesn’t know what to do. you couldn’t possibly want him sober, right?

Fireworks -  bucky barnes doesn’t do crowds. he certainly doesn’t do fireworks. but he’d follow you just about anywhere

Lavender -  not every nightmare is the same and bucky doesn’t always wake up as the man you know

Feel again -  instantly captivated by the woman the nurses have dubbed the ‘frequent flyer’ of the emergency department, Bucky can’t help but fall for y/n. he relishes every moment he can spend with her and with her apparent clumsiness, it’s quite often. that is, until he learns the real reason behind her injuries

A new start -  woken from a nightmare plagued with memories from his time in hydra, bucky finds himself standing at a mirror at 3am holding a pair of scissors, determined to cut away the strongest connection he has left to that time. his hair

 Cold, cold water -  while on a stakeout in the heart of russia, bucky learns that touch can bring something more than pain and he will willingly give himself over to the ice if it means keeping you alive

The other side of the door -  bucky would do anything to keep you safe. even if it meant sacrificing himself. even if it took him to the bottom of the ocean

A twice broken man -  knowing what will happen if hydra ever captures him again, bucky asks the impossible of you. the road to recovery is not an easy one

I still need you - bucky tries to end his life. the reader has to give him a reason to live

Remembering him - the reader can play with minds and memories. she gets hired by tony stark to restore a certain super soldier’s memories

Camera view - while triggered into winter soldier mode, bucky nearly kills the reader

All yours - you have to flirt while on an undercover mission. bucky is jealous and not having any of it - smut

Unconventional night out - the reader meets bucky while they are both hiding inside a restaurant, one from a creepy guy at the bar, the other from a terrible blind date

Let me help you - reader is one of the only people that is kind to bucky (besides steve obviously) and he doesn’t understand why but the reader is too scared to say that theyre in love with him

Eight times - eight times Bucky Barnes said ‘I love you’ without saying ‘I love you’, and the one time he actually said it

Only thing that matters - t’s the morning after, and bucky makes it clear you mean more to him than he lets on

Milo - when a little black kitten won’t leave bucky alone, he has no choice but to take it home with him

Conscious - when bucky gets seriously injured on a mission, it’s your job to keep him awake until backup arrives

Trigger - while held captive during a mission gone wrong, bucky realizes that the enemy is going to trigger his winter soldier mode. in a panic and desperate to prevent that, he begs the reader to do the unthinkable

You"ll go away - the reader finally has bucky. but will her anxious mind ruin her newfound relationship?

Impaled - you’ve been pining after bucky for months. a compromising situation during a mission brings you a lot closer to him than you expected

Confessions after dark - you’d been in love with bucky barnes from the minute you set eyes on him. the only problem? bucky barnes had hated you from the minute he set eyes on you. when the two of you find yourselves forced together on an assignment, some unexpected revelations are made in the darkness of a shared motel room

Wanderlust adventures SOCIAL MEDIA - y/n is a popular travel blogger, and a freelance travel writer for a magazine. she travels the world with her two best friends, valkyrie who is a freelance graphic designer that the reader “drags” out of bed to see the world, and carol who’s a new up and coming model. this is the first time in a year all three girls are traveling together due to carol’s new busy career. a month long european excursion, that might end up being their last trip together due to their lives taking them elsewhere. bucky barnes used to be a model but now travels the world with his best friends. he has a hard time commiting to one thing, which is why he loves to travel so much. he travels the world with his two best friends, steve who runs a gym in brooklyn and sam, who works for a popular food magazine where he gets to travel and eat all the food he wants. bucky has once again convinced his childhood best friends to join him on a month long trip to escape the trapped feeling of being back in New York. steve and sam are worried about bucky and his constant need to runaway from his issues, they’re hoping this trip will be an eye opener for their friend

Oh no, that's bad SOCIAL MEDIA - you’re a college student, you’re mad angry, bucky ruins your paper, that’s not good is it?

SPY SOCIAL MEDIA - cap and sam recruit a new super soldier whilst on a mission in paris. when she moves into the avengers tower, she immediately hits it off with everyone, except bucky. will they ever make it past their differences enough to realise just how perfect they are together?

Promisse SOCIAL MEDIA - you and bucky met when you guys were kids. everyone that didn't know you thought that you were both dating, everyone that knew you thought you both should be dating each other. "we're just friends" were what you both will say when others ask if you're dating. but are you both really just friends?

Lost in a crowd SOCIAL MEDIA - Lilith Greene is in her junior year of her creative writing degree program. she's best friends with peter parker and his girlfriend MJ, and mostly spends her time telling the pair to get to class when she's not writing poetry

Sleep and other things 

Took you long enough -  ontrary to popular belief, sam qilson did care for bucky barnes. does he mess with him any chance he gets? yes, but he makes it so easy (and it’s always out of love). so when he notices the super assassin turn into super mush around a certain teammate, he knows he has to do something about it

Epiphany - "you keep saying that you're friends, but you look at him a moment too long for that to be true"

Are you leaving my love behind? - at lot can happen in five years, but even more can happen in a few months

I hate you, really hate you - you’re married and truths about your marriage are about to come to light

Years later - bucky doesn’t have the best of luck. or at least he didn’t until the day he finally met his soulmate

Why can't I say I'm in love? - as a young girl you went into town with your parents to see the villagers. that’s where you met one little boy who would change your life and your heart. but as the princess of the kingdom, there are things that are expected of you. falling in love with the baker’s son is not one of them

The first of many - sometimes people surprise you

Helpless - we were at a revel with some rebels on a hot night

GSW - after getting injured in Brooklyn, steve forces bucky to visit the local VA hospital

Late night devils - bucky gets revenge on his ex with you, the girl he never got over no matter how much he thought he did - smut

If the world was ending - bucky knows he’s still in love with you a year after the two of you mutually agreed to break up. when one phone call spirals into one plan being made and then another, and then suddenly he’s staying at your place, he wonders if there may be a chance to try again

Scorched - “you utterly destroyed me, you know that? I loved you more than I needed to breathe and you just walked away. I lost everything and you walked away”

Dog tags - you are a kept prisoner by hydra, your role is to fix soldat’s metal arm whenever it gets damaged in a mission. you grow fond of each other and you decide to save him

The only one FIC - you were in love with this guy and in college, you could’ve made it work but you had to go home and now 6 years later it might be too late to be with the only man you ever truly loved

Happiness FIC - you are best friends with bucky and then something happens that will change your relationship with him forever

Faking it FIC - you are sent on a mission by fury, only problem is your mission partner, and fake boyfriend, is the one person on the team you cannot stand

Always take care of you - some post-mission friskiness with bucky boy - smut

Undercover - you and bucky go on an undercover mission, where you need to pretend to be married. you are close to solving the case when bucky decides he’s done pretending

Rusted - the team encounters helmut zemo, who activates the winter soldier

Valentine's shots - bucky indulges in some bodyshots

The five times bucky saved you FIC - you have a special bond with bucky. he’s more than your best friend, your partner in missions, the person you care most about. he often saved you from uncomfortable situations, always ready to protect you, but sometimes, you are the one who did the saving

Fight for you FIC - at the annual local boxing championship, Y/N is the leading medical specialist on call. it’s a whole new environment, and despite the drastic change, she loves it. bucky barnes is the reigning boxing champion of brooklyn. virtually undefeated, this tattoo artist by day, boxer by night is someone that is now fighting his way into Y/N’s head. and she’s helpless in front of his winning streak

Flowers bloom FIC - whenever someone is injured, flowers bloom on their soulmate at the area of the wound. she is born with flowers around her entire left shoulder

Guiding light FIC - it was supposed to be a simple mission. get the intel and go home. until everything goes wrong and you’re taken captive by hydra. while you struggle to stay alive and hold your sanity, bucky begins to lose himself to a darkness and gives into the soldier because he doesn’t know how to breathe without you. not until he brings you home. If he even can

Home - fresh out of a divorce, Y/N moves to sun valley for a fresh start, a house left to her by her aunt and a new job as a nanny. James ‘bucky’ barnes owns a law firm and has been left with three kids after his wife died giving birth to their youngest. bucky is nervous about leaving the kids with a nanny but he cant keep finding babysitters and the kids need someone more permanent around

Sup, professor SOCIAL MEDIA - bucky barnes is the “most handsomest man” that you have ever laid your eyes on and oh, would you look at that. he's your professor

Oh no, it's you SOCIAL MEDIA - you have your life figured out, doing good in med school, moved on from your past, and even got a new job with that apartment that your family left you. oh would you look at that, your new neighbor is bucky barnes, a model and a rising actor. oh yeah, he also happens to be the guy that you claim to have moved on from. fuck

- Hey, it's me again - you got the wrong number but it’s okay you have nice memes and oh sure I can help you out and oh no..nonononononono….im not falling for you…..right?

What the hell, bucky? SOCIAL MEDIA - you and bucky grew up together as he lived right across the street. he’s the world’s biggest asshole, but also your most trusted confidant. no, you don’t have a crush on him. because bucky is steve’s friend and steve likes you

Dog tags - tony holds a ball, and your boyfriend get’s a little distracted when he sees you

Assert dominance

Love by mistake SOCIAL MEDIA

All in my head SOCIAL MEDIA - y/n l/n makes some friends who all live on the same floor in the dorms. they are all freshman health and human development majors at NYU

Savior - you and bucky are trapped in a HYDRA base and about to be killed. or maybe not…

Bad boys do it well - rumor is that bucky wants to ask you out but word on the street was that you didn’t date bad boys

Intimacy - you tend to your boyfriend's wounds after he returns from a mission and you share an intimate moment

No subtleties

Salt 

Cuddle with me - steve did not expected to find his best friend there

Ocean eyes - this is the story of James bucky barnes learning what love and being loved is like

Best friends - you're best friends with bucky but you struggle with being around him due the fact that you heya feelings for him and boy does he love to flirt. you talk to Steve all the time about your liking towards bucky and how you think he may like you back but then you start to notice how close he's gotten with Natasha and that thread of hope flies out the window

- Best friends part 2

I'm breaking up with you - bucky tries breaking up with you but you're not having it

Shy - you like bucky but every time you try and talk to him, he avoids you

- Shy part 2

Art - bucky is insecure about his metal arm

Only you can do that

14

Insults - reader and bucky can't get along one day while they are arguing bucky realizes he actually likes her and starts to act weird and she confronts him about his acts

I love you

Worries - bucky overhears that you worry that he will leave you natasha

Underneath the mistletoe - there's a Christmas party and sam uses redwing to hold a mistletoe over people making them kiss and he keeps trying to get bucky and y/n but bucky keeps running away cause he's nervous and scared cause he has a huge crush on her

My girl - bucky saw your ex kiss you and bucky goes wild and attacks him

Seduce me - bucky has to be with you yo protect you in an operation where you have to flirt and seduce someone and he goes all jealous

Suck a flirt - bucky gets drunk and flirts with reader

Fool

Realization - Y/N is in love with bucky but he is dating and in love with someone else. however the girl broke his heart and he finally realizes a year after his heartbreak that he loves Y/N

Distance - you’re insecure that bucky still likes natasha and will leave you for her and you start to distance yourself from him and it hurts him when you two barely talk anymore

Pick me - reader need help with a world history unit abou the WWII, so the two super soldiers fight over who’s going to help her

Camping - the whole team went on a camping trip and they all knew that bucky and the reader have feelings for each other, so they decided to them in one tent

Joint custody - reader and bucky broke up, having to share time with their kid which ultimately brings them back together

8,66 - “are you eating again?” “you look good enough to eat”

3 - “this is me. I am the eye of the storm and my heart is a little broken but if you want me, I’m yours”

Bottles, babies and bucky SOCIAL MEDIA -  Y/N and bucky are a couple of newlyweds eager to bask in their honeymoon period after their dream wedding. However, they soon find that this won’t be easy with 3 rambunctious small children running around the Brooklyn small apartment the family lives in. what happens when Y/N finds out she’s expecting? how will she tell bucky who made it very clear that their third child was also to be their last?

Weekend at bucky’s SOCIAL MEDIA -  workaholic bucky barnes is a successful CEO of a prosthetics company that works endlessly to meet the needs of the people in desperate need of his products. his best friends steve rogers-wilson and sam wilson-rogers signed up the CEO for a nightly adult writing class after he let slip his desire to write his own story but currently lacked the skills to do so. Y/N is the teacher of this particular class whilst she trains to become a kindergarten teacher, she lives with her roommates natasha romanoff and wanda maximoff however it feels more like she has 4 roommates the amount of time her friends better halves spend at their small brooklyn apartment. they keep her sweet with clints amazingly good brownies and vision is just a wonder of personality in Y/N’s opinion. what will happen between the two when they meet and get to know each other at these classes? what happens when Bucky invites Y/N to spend the weekend at his cabin upstate? will take them a weekend to fall in love? or a weekend to fall out of it?

Coffe and cratons SOCIAL MEDIA -  kindergarten teacher bucky barnes suddenly finds himself becoming a frequent customer of a cozy little coffee shop, newly opened around the corner of his school. self-proclaimed queen of coffee and the shop’s owner Y/N quickly finds herself giving barnes the title of “favourite customer”. will caffeine simply be their only addiction or will they find a new release within each other?

TEXT

Words left unsaid SOCIAL MEDIA -  you’re a graduate student at a university pursuing a doctorate degree in biology while also working in a prestigious lab under alexander pierce. however, the university requires you to take an english course to ensure you are fully competent in teaching a course and able to write your dissertation. lucky for you, you’re allowed to take an undergraduate english class, which would be much easier than an upper division one. with a full graduate course load, teaching a 4-hour anatomy lab and working in lab the rest of the days, this english class is the least of your worries. but once you meet your professor, that all changes; you were never interested in anyone or had time for anyone. but for him, you’re willing to try

Trepidation - everything in your world was right until bucky’s ex girlfriend came along

- Trepidation part 2

- Trepidation part 3

“You have a what?” - your 5 year old daughter comes home from school and says she has a boyfriend this doesn’t sit well with bucky

I love you too

I need your help FIC -  bucky gets an invitation to a family friends wedding and it turns out that his ex girlfriend will be attending as well. panicked at the thought of seeing her, he asks you, his best friend to attend the wedding with him as his girlfriend in attempts to show his ex that he’s moved on

Don’t say anything FIC -  you finally decide to tell bucky that you’ve been in love with him since the day you met but what happens when you walk in on him with a girl? and not just any girl; natasha

Heartbroken - bucky cheats on the reader, she’s heartbroken and he realizes what he’s done, so he decide to do everything to get his girl back

Before it's too late FIC - bucky starts dating a girl from his history of art class. the only problem: you’re in love with him

Protective barnes - reader’s ex-boyfriend comes back to pick up some things and meets bucky, her new boyfriend

He understood - you try and convince bucky to attend tony's funeral

6

First date - what happens when Y/N forgets about her date with bucky and is babysitting her niece? 

Sprained ankle - movie night at the tower goes south when someone sprains an ankle

It's 3 AM - Y/N has a nightmare about bucky and needs to make sure he is okay

Neighbors - Y/N is bucky’s neighbor and they find each other super adorable

A bit of warning would be nice - bucky is gets nervous when Y/N and sam come back late from a hike together

Glasses - Y/N’s contact lenses met an unfortunate fate which leads to her wearing her glasses

Unexpected - Y/N’s ex shows up unexpectedly. she feels scared that he is going to show up at her apartment so she asks bucky to stay the night

- Unexpected part 2

Gone - bucky is met with some trouble on a mission and loses contact with Y/N, who is helping him back at the tower

Hands off - you’re Steve’s cousin and he has some rules when it comes to you that bucky isn’t a fan of. mainly, that he can’t have you

Sometime around midnight - bucky lost you once…but he can’t again

Break you - bucky has himself a winter soldier episode, nearly killing his girlfriend as a result

A fear that changes - it was not the winter soldier that scared you, even on his worst day. no, what had scared you more than anything else was bucky barnes

What did I do wrong - bucky doesn't understand what he could have possibly done to lose the love of his life

Help a buddy out - you and bucky are roommates and you ask for him to teach you to be better at sex so you can please another guy

Clouds - bucky overhears something unsettling at a party

He's not the one

That's my girl

The bet

Second chance - Y/N gives bucky a home, a family, a love, a second chance

I'll never forget

Safe house - when a mission goes south, you make it a personal mission to make your boyfriend bucky barnes see the light at the end of the tunnel by taking him to your safe house

You don't have to be alone

Three ways you can dance - one can dance in three ways; fists, feet and lips

Toothpaste kisses - in which Y/N makes herself at home, and bucky is only too happy about it

Homesick of home - in which the reader finds herself at her childhood home, away from the person she truly considers her actual home

Fond of the classics - when the sexual tension between you and bucky is stifling, natasha becomes her scheming, conniving self - smut

The best life - in which you tell your favourite people (what could be) the best news in the world

"Someone like me doesn't get happy endings"

Paris

Deathcycle

Something new - short blurb about you sitting on bucky’s face because I’m a sucker for face sitting and for bucky

Angry

Drunken girls night - just a cute bucky blurb of bucky taking care of you when you come home drunk

Going down - “I have found a new home, and it’s between your thighs.” bucky said cheekily, “I’d rather say here for a while”

End of the day - you: I want to watch horror movies with your hand either down my pants or stroking my hair. I can’t decide. bucky, your hot detective boyfriend: I have two hands, I can do both ;) 

Troublemaker - you thank bucky in your own wonderful way. he kinda loves it

Laundry day - well, it’s laundry day and it turns out to be eventful 

Possible-future-girlfriend - bucky claims you can’t flirt for shit, you prove him wrong

Home - after a rough mission, bucky just wants to go home. he learns what that word truly means when he gets there

Only love can hurt like this

Speak up - Y/N’s gotta stop mouthing off… or does she?

The power of a promise - you and bucky are taking a trip to visit your parents and he promises to behave

Love like ours - "I want to kiss every inch of your body before I fuck you"

Another bad day - "I wanna take my time with you tonight" "yes I know I cry a lot, so what?"

Your bucky

Bucky to the rescue - "I'd rather die than let you get hurt"

Beautiful morning - "have I told you that you look the most beautiful when you wake up?"

Kisses - "quick, kiss me!"

Family time

A bet

My gorgeous queen - "excuse you! have you ever looked at your reflection? you're so gorgeous I wanna stab out my eye!"

Are you afraid? - reader finds out she's pregnant and is absolutely petrified to tell bucky because he's still in recovery and it was unplanned

Playing to win - game night takes an exciting turn and bucky’s answer to a particular question really gets you thinking

The ball pit - "I don't want to lose you"

That's a promise - "I'm gonna fuck you so much you'll be pissing my cum for days to come"

Hand tricks - "blindfolds heighten your senses, maybe that's why you're whimpering louder than usual"

Caught with your pants down - walking in the common room and finding bucky playing with himself on the couch in his sleep

Hunger - bucky is trying out some new recipes for the restaurant, he asks you to have a taste and you ask for a cooking lesson

Beautiful - bucky is dating reader who struggles with her wight feeling like she's too skinny, oe not curvy enough to be with them

Sweet frostings - baking peanut butter cupcakes for bucky while he's away on a mission

Lucky charm - bucky rescues you in more ways than one

I'm not scared - bucky and reader snuggling up for the first time. reader's hesitant to lay their head on his left shoulder. seeing him deflate they admit they're just scared it might hurt him when they lay their head where metal meets flesh

Unrequited

- Unrequited part 2

Good morning, soldier! - reader walking into bucky’s room to surprise him for his birthday, and reader is flustered when she sees he is buck naked on top of the sheets and subconsciously playing with himself in his sleep

Love in bloom - it’s your birthday and bucky makes the day special in every way, even taking you to a place you’ve always wanted to visit in spring

Like the good ole days - reader and bucky in quarantine

Match mode - being rebecca’s caretaker and with her when her brother bucky shows up to reconnect one day. she also may or may not play matchmaker between the two of you

I need you

Chibis everywhere - showing bucky all the cute and funny chili fan arts of him 

Confessions of love - you confess your feelings for bucky to natasha during a girl’s night. completely unaware of a certain pair of ears listening

Helping a roomie out - bucky is your new roommate, a hot delicious snack on legs

Smell of roses - “fuck you smell so good.” “did I smell bad yesterday?”

Past and present - reader ends up during the 30s and meets "young" bucky. she always had a crush on him but he never indicated he'd interested in her. 30s!buckys immediately wants to take her on a date and everything

Flaws - reader and bucky arguing over each other's personality flaws during a rough round of sex - smut

It's not a micro - he hasn’t been in a relationship for a long time. all his dates seem to hit it and quit it. you have this thing… you tease him that they don’t stick around because he’s got a micro-cock. one day he shows you exactly how wrong you are

Sassy doll - “there’s a reason I don’t celebrate my birthday.” “is it because you’re so old you don’t even remember when it was?”

Just gettin' started - "kiss my ass" "sucky my dick"

No more games - "when we get home, I'm cuffing you to the bed and going down on you all night" "fine by me, you look hot with you head between my legs"

Heart of gold - bucky finds you hanging out with loki and he immediately thinks it’s because you like him. problem is, bucky likes you…now what!?!

Say it again - on a regular night at the compound you’re all drinking wine and having fun when things get a little heated between you and bucky…

Finders keepers - oreos, bucky’s henley and scary movies…

The secret drawer - bucky accidentally finds your large dildo/vibrator in your secret drawer in the bedroom

Secrets - “Did you fart? It smells like ass in here.” “Not my fault you finally smell your own scent.”

Drench me - "spit on my pussy. make me really wet"

Race to the finish - an innocent game of mario kart turns into much more when you get a feel of bucky’s beard

Don't even think about it - bucky threatens to shave off his beard so you come up with a plan to thwart his efforts…

Not my name - reader is tired of shitty sex and clint’s constant teasing. bucky decides to take matters into his own hands

Feeling is mutual - "can you feel what you do to me?"

Morning goodness - bucky and reader are in a new relationship and reader sleeps over for the first time, unexpectedly feeling the morning wood rubbing up against their ass

Sex on the... what? - "I really wanna have a sex on the beach" "it's winter though" "no you dummy, I meant the drink"

Whatever you say, pal - "I once had a woman  pass out from an orgasm" "really? can't imagine what from. my banana is longer than your wiener"

The slip-up - bucky accidentally calling a new recruit "doll" and kinda hates how close she gets to him, making the reader jealous 

I told you so - bucky is sick and mentions being horny

Come back, come back to me - "look at my horny and sex staved little doll. you're dripping onto my sheets"

He finds out your secret

Nat calls you a prude and your secret is revealed

Find you - after he broke off with you, you got a phone call that left you worried, you had no chance but to find hi and make sure he was okay

Because he can

Motorcycle - bucky punishing you by putting you on the back of his motorcycle with no panties while he rides fast and the feeling of the vibrations of the bike between your legs has you soaked

Daddy kink - reader has a daddy kink and Bucky finds out an teases her about it and makes her cum so many times, she’ll think she passes out

Age gap - where reader is significantly younger than bucky

Never leaving you - reader is alone in the tower and someone breaks in shooting her

I want to cuddle - reader with needy bucky

Protection - tony Starks little sister is in a failing relationship. they are at the tower arguing and Tony came in the room just as the guy was hitting her, but before he could do something about it, bucky storms over and knocks the guy through the wall

Halloween party

Leather jacket

The video - reader sees videos of bucky being tortured by hidra

Warmth - reader gets cold really easily and bucky keeps her warm

Dylan o'brien - bucky being jealous and extremely annoyed over you fangirl-ing over dylan o'brien new movie

Clingy - the boys tease bucky over him being a clingy and protective boyfriend

Secret admirer - bucky gets jealous and protective when he finds out that a man has been showering you, his wife, with gifts and presents and letters and confronts that man

I would never hurt you - bucky and reader don't get along, and he keeps making snarky comments and eventually the reader gets into a huge argument with him, he raises his metal hand and the reader gets scared

Shopping - you're Natasha's best friend and wanted to go shopping with her but she gets called to a mission. bucky sees you being pissed and offers to help

Bucky's plan - you and bucky are together, and bucky gets it in his head that'd be a great idea to dance with another woman ate a party to make you jealous

You deserve better - pietro is an ass to the reader and she is like best friends with buck

Safe - where steve goes to bucks apartment but instead of just bucky, he found too bucky's heavily pregnant girlfriend 

Clint's daughter - reader is clint's daughter and last time bucky saw her was when she was younger and now she's grown up and he starts feeling things 

- Clint's daughter part 2

- Clint's daughter part 3

Russian bucky - bucky pretending not to know english n only speaking russian and he overhears you talking about him 

Suprise - you're bucky girlfriend and one day you surprise him after work in his room to see him just in some sweats after he had a shower

Short hair - steve one day takes bucky to get a haircut like the old days and he comes back to the tower handsome asf

Self defense trainer - bucky gives self defense lessons in his free time and you're there to take lessons

More than fucky buddies - you and bucky were having some kind of secret affair while living in the tower but also developed strong feelings for each other

You're good enough for me - bucky being insecure and jealous of pietro

Not so shy - you and bucky are a couple and all the other avengers ship you a lot

Not good enough - reader thinks she isn't good enough for bucky and thinks she doesn't have a chance, but unbeknownst to her, bucky loves everything about her

Shy - you're dating bucky but you're also a bit shy and you feel bad about it, but bucky thinks it's totally cute and loves it

Movie night - reader and bucky hate each other, and one night at the tower it's movie night and reader takes bucky's seat and when bucky comes back he tells her to get up but she doesn't

You and bucky don't get along 

- You and bucky don't get along part 2

- You and bucky don't get along part 3

Save me 

Mission impossible 

The acquisition FIC - you are part of a business merger. can you make it through with your heart still intact, or will the winter solder tear you apart?

Cookies make everything better - your son has a nightmare and bucky makes cookies to make him feel better

Dream walker - you are able to enter bucky’s dream to help him

Distraction - bucky helps you in your time of need

Insatiable - "we've been at it like rabbits, how are you still horny?"

Saddle up! - bucky takes you for more than one good ride

When things get rough - bucky being soft and gorgeous while pretending to be your loving husband and being so good at it that you're both not sure if you're only pretending anymore until he gets jealous

I'll be okay - day in bed with bucky

His type - bucky reaction to hearing such lies coming from readers mouth when she's talking to her friend on the phone and is convinced she stands zero chance with him

Blind date

Medic

A touch of blue - you love wearing bucky’s henleys and his new blue one is too good to pass up

- A touch of blue part 2

Cocktail - you love to visit bucky at work

- Cocktail part 2

Bartender - bucky and you having sex on the bar after it closes

27

First for everything - losing your virginity to college bucky

Undercover lover - you and bucky are acting as a married couple on an undercover cop assignment. everything is under control until some asshole decides to get handsy

"You still have all of me, however broken I am"

Like this - body massage with bucky

Always - stripper reader with biker bucky

In the alley - you and bucky disagree on how you handled your mission

Big boy barnes - having sex with bucky for the first time and underestimate his size

Eavesdropping - "how long have you been standing there?"

Scream for me - smut with no plot

Mishaps - bartender bucky

Fun at the BBQ - reader gets cheeky during the summer BBQ

Only yours - "your ass is gonna be seven different shades of red after that little stunt

Faster, soldier - "faster" "I need you to hold onto something then"

The mall

I wish we were alone now - "I can't wait until we're alone. there are so many things I want to do to you right now"

Homecoming - 40s bucky

Six steamy sentences

Bucky has a hard time - sam mixed bucky's pills up and he's accidentally taken some viagra. now he's rock hard in the middle of Siberia with you in a tent

Better than a dream - bucky has a wet dram and trudges to reader's room in the early morning for sex

The edge of glory - you and bucky try something new in the bedroom

Food for thought - "stick your fingers in the pie and have a taste! it's delicious!" "I'd rather stick them in you"

Soft beard, warm beard - "tour beard is so soft"

Seal the deal - you and make make a deal over a game of twister

My face, your boxers

Pretty girl - bucky barnes is your mentor as tony stark puts you through the ultimate training before you’re officially named an avenger. however, working with bucky proves to be difficult as his cold nature to your only makes you want him more

Squat here often? - the thought alone preens another wet moan straight from the base of your throat. bucky picks up on it, nuzzling the shape of his lips into the source with a hum. his voice is a soft cradle on the bare skin. “you’re something carved straight from a teenage wet dream. so tight and little .. always bent over. sometimes, I just want to haul you to the locker room mid set and bend you over one of those benches”

Surprise 

Ditto - you and bucky are on a mission and forced to share the king sized bed. with wouldn't usually have been a problem if you and bucky didn't hate each other's guts

Thirsty

Knife skills

All of me

Tall, dark and handsome

Silence - bucky is distant and you don't know what to do

Like your eyes - you have a crush on bucky Barnes and watch helplessly as he gets dressed for his date

Wrong side of the bed - bucky is in a bad mood and accidentally snaps at reader who is very shy and timid and she spends the day in her room

Pineapple pizza - being forced into getting a personal trainer by your friend, you soon find yourself swooning for the man himself

- Pineapple pizza part 2

Mentor - bucky barnes is your mentor that you have developed a crush on, one night feelings are revealed and you say the wrong thing, immediately regretting everything

Cozy - cozy cuddles and banter with bucky

Hot chocolate - bucky's cafe is your little sweet escape

Pda - a view of bucky and his struggle with pda

The five times you lay your eyes on bucky

Cold - you’re in the shop with bucky as he works on fixing up his bike, getting colder by the minute, until you decide to ask bucky to warm you up

Tradition - who knew bucky was one for a holiday tradition?

Daydream - you and bucky intimately reconnect with one another

Man's best friend - you take in your neighbours dog for a night only to learn that a dog is man’s best wingman

I quit - while working as a nanny for bucky barnes, you slowly develop feelings for him, only growing more and more in love with him

Groceries - you encounter bucky barnes and his five year old son during a trip to the supermarket, little did you know that little leo was the world’s greatest wingman

Nsfw alphabet

Favorite girl - bucky barnes is the leader of the most dangerous mob in new york city, but when he finds you, his favourite dancer, at his local strip club he can’t help but fall for you. but he wants you to be more than his favourite dancer, he wants you to be his favourite and only girl

Impatient - with bucky’s busy lifestyle you don’t get him to yourself often, so when you think he’s finally free you intend to have him all to yourself

Best friends daughter - bucky barnes walks with confidence and elegance radiating off of him, tantalizing everyone he meets. you met your dad’s best friend with no intentions of falling for him, but it seems the universe had different plans

The busted shower head - a busted shower head results in mind-blowing shower sex with your neighbour, who also happens to be your dad’s best friend

More than perfect 

Cafe au latte - bucky stars working at the coffe shop you own and feelings happen

Scorned - losing your father and natasha was enough. now, the man who you have sacrificed every fiber of your soul to is leaving you too

Asleep - soft bedtime interaction 

This is not a drill - reader and daughter play a prank on bucky

7/87 - "do you want some soup?" "oh my god, I love you"

17/18 - "you're so warm" "you're freezing, jesus"

33/34 - "sometimes I just want to cuddle, okay? is that so bad?" "now I know half my wardrobe went"

64/69/88 - “I can’t believe you eat pineapple on pizza…what sort of monster are you?" “I don’t think I could love you anymore than I already do.” “put me down! I can walk!”

Morning pancakes - a cheerful morning turns into one of anger and snakes

Not you - bucky has loved the reader for three years. she has loved him for two. both are dumbasses, and sam is fed up

Gone for too long - reader leaves for a mission that should take around a week, but as the days roll by, bucky gets more and more worried

Don't let me fall - bucky and the reader have been blissfully been together for three months, the two absolutely and utterly in love. but when a mission goes wrong and leaves the reader in a coma, barely clinging to life, bucky fears that he might break and this time forever

Reciprocated - after being bothered by brock rumlow’s incessant pestering of asking the reader out, she agrees but obviously regrets it. she has a ginormous crush on the star quarterback bucky barnes, who unbeknownst to her is absolutely head over heels for the girl and when she needs help getting rid of brock, he turns into her knight in shining armour

A promise kept - the reader is a SHIELD agent that used to be a double agent for hydra where she found and fell in love with bucky. but zemo has found him as well and time is ticking for the reader to save the man she loves

You don't have to be alone - reader has recently broken her leg and the only two people in the tower are pretty much her and bucky. usually, that wouldn’t be a problem but her major crush on the guy could cause some awkward moments and when feelings are revealed things can drastically change

Not pretending - reader’s reunion is just around the corner, which means meeting her ex. they used to be high school sweethearts, but after she found out he was cheating she broke up with him. but now, still being single, the reader feels like she needs to bring someone and when bucky offers his assistance, feelings might be revealed

Deserving - bucky and the reader have been together for half a year now, and he’s never felt happier. but when peter parker gets a crush on the reader, bucky slowly starts to think that maybe he isn’t the right one for her

[manekinoodle]

The Worst (TM) Pathologic Ship

A preamble is probably necessary here. This is written in good fun and is not meant to offend. Imagine me cackling obnoxiously while you’re reading. It’ll set the right mood.

TLDR: Andrey/Mark conceivably works as a ship.

How was this idea even born?

Y’know when you say something funny and then a friend says something funny and it keeps building up? That’s what happened. If you remember my little comic about Andrey teaching Grace to shoot, the dummy was in Mark Immortell’s likeness. The following conversation happened with regards to that:

>Peter was just trying to save Andrey from getting even more on Mark’s shitlist

>mark “oh please, if you want to use my likeness for target practice, just hit me up”

>Sounds like a date

>i mean you can’t shoot mark right

>OH NO

>Andrey/mark

At this point the gears started turning. My first thoughts were “haha cursed” as they are about a lot of things, and then I decided to hit up Wattpad for some terrible x reader fanfiction to help me write a Mark Immortell x reader fic.  I didn’t hit up Wattpad because I’m currently at home with my parents who dictate me a nice early bedtime. I slept on it for a bit.

The next morning, I screamed (internally) because somehow the Mark x reader idea I had slept on became a strong urge to write/draw Mark/Andrey. Ironically, of course. That’s my brand. Heh.

I chewed on the idea until it wasn’t so ironic anymore.

Actual stuff under the cut.

Ok, but why?

Look, this isn’t gonna be full of evidence or whatever since these two don’t interact, but this is a joke post anyway, so why do you care? I’m half-kidding, please keep reading. I used the wiki as a loose reference.

An important note is that I’m mostly taking my points from Pathologic 2 characterisations here, especially with regards to meta.

The Players

Let’s take a look at each character separately first. I’ll bring up important canon personality traits and personal interpretations which will play into the relationship dynamic.

Mark Immortell

The most relevant part of Mark’s character for this is his relationship with control. His relationship with it is straightforward in both the play and the meta. After all, he is one of the few impervious to the plague in the story and as the showrunner in meta. In between games, he wrests control of the metanarrative too, so there’s another point for him. I like how he seems to enjoy exercising his power too! He’s a Utopian through and through; he breaks the limits of the play and exercises control beyond what he should be able to as a showrunner in the game. In short, nothing gets on top of Mark Immortell. Figuratively. I think his back might say otherwise.

Andrey Stamatin

I have a lot more to say about Andrey! We’ll start with what lies on the surface, though we’ll get to the good stuff later. Andrey is the red oni to Peter’s blue; he’s the more outwardly aggressive and impulsive of the twins. In canon, Andrey’s character is about breaking the limits set in front of him. We see him do this quite effectively with the construction of the Polyhedron, but what happens when there’s a limit that can’t be broken placed in front of him? We never see this in either game. While both twins drown themselves in something or other that stops them reaching their full creative potential (at least when we see them), no limits are placed in a way where they’re seen actively having to tackle them.

We can get an idea of how an unbreakable limit might present itself to Andrey by taking a look at his relationship with Peter. There’s a lot that can be said, but I will focus on the aspect of control. Andrey fashions himself as Peter’s caretaker, taking control of the latter in a sense. This isn’t a bad thing, considering Peter can barely look after himself properly. On the other hand, Andrey allows himself to be dragged around by Peter’s creative visions. He’s the driving force that brings those ideas to life, sure, but ultimately his strings are being pulled by someone else. From this I think that Andrey is receptive to being controlled in a relationship. Being presented with an unbreakable limit can conceivably end up with him being pliant.

Let me make a slight detour by giving you a couple of personal thoughts on Andrey. Feel free to disagree on this since it’s all interpretation based on gut feeling. A good first impression to Andrey Stamatin would be having your figurative fangs out. A seemingly pure existence without hidden fangs is something that cannot exist to him (an exception can be made for Eva, since she’s so out there that it’s 100% not an act). I don’t believe he places sole value on honesty, per se (think Grief and how soft he actually is), but it plays a large part in his perception of someone. Basically, put your worst foot forward. Andrey is down for that.

How would this work, exactly?

On one hand, we have the meta-dealing Chris McLean himself, and on the other, Mr Andrey “I break all the rules” Stamatin. Let’s try and tell a short story, and I’ll bring up the points I made above when appropriate.

SCENE 1

Every romance must start with a meet cute. Refer to the comic I mentioned at the beginning. PETER has tackled ANDREY to the ground. GRACE is holding a fake gun. There is a training dummy with the likeness of MARK IMMORTELL.

Enter MARK. He calmly walks past the scene and examines the dummy. Impressed, he turns to ANDREY, who has since stood up.

MARK IMMORTELL:         Quite an impressive dummy you’ve made, Andrey.

MARK snickers. The focus is on ANDREY and MARK as PETER and GRACE slowly back away. They expect a fight. Just let them leave, they don’t do anything. PETER and GRACE decide to get some ice-cream off-stage, or maybe paint at home. Anywhere that isn’t here.

MARK IMMORTELL:         If you really wanted to use my likeness as target practice, you could have hit me up.

This was his attempt to provoke. I read this as Mark acknowledging his invulnerability, but this could also be read as an amorous proposal. ANDREY takes the bait and tries to intimidate this tiny little theatre man. He makes to kick MARK in the shin, but Mark’s valise finds itself under his chin before he can do so. ANDREY stalls. MARK looks satisfied with his reaction. He won’t be satisfied for long.

MARK IMMORTELL:         I hope you don’t mind me taking this. I’ll use it in my next show. Do come to see it, won’t you, Andrey?

He leans in towards the other. ANDREY tries to verbally protest, but he finds he cannot speak.

MARK IMMORTELL:         It would be quite a shame if you didn’t.

MARK calls a tragedian to pick the dummy up. As quickly as he entered the stage, he leaves with the tragedian. ANDREY’s gaze follows him, confused. Fade to black.

SCENE 2

The Theatre at night. Enter ANDREY, somewhat nervous. Well, he is nervous but doesn’t act like it. He’s hoping nobody asks him what he’s doing here. BACHELOR and HARUSPEX are chatting in a corner, noticing but not acknowledging Andrey’s presence. CHANGELING is on the second floor, looking down at the scene. ANDREY doesn’t notice her. She snickers into the camera.

Lights are cast on the stage and a pantomime plays out, featuring Andrey’s dummy. ANDREY watches, spellbound. I don’t have an idea of what the pantomime would be, so use your own imagination. After the show ends, only ANDREY is left in the Theatre. The three healers have left in the meantime. They knew what was going to happen. ANDREY, as if possessed, approaches the stage. MARK enters the stage from stage left and they stop in front of each other. MARK looks down at ANDREY almost derisively, but to his surprise, ANDREY just stares back. Beat.

MARK IMMORTELL:         I didn’t expect to see you here today, little shark pup.

Pet name? It’s Mark being a meanie! Andrey is eating this up, however, because overt control is something he can accept. Mark just established dominance over him in Scene 1 and he’s okay with not fighting back… If this was longer, I would have had him try to push a bit more, but we don’t got time for that. Back to the actual play.

ANDREY tries to say something, but it comes out as an unintelligible mumble. MARK lifts his chin up with the end of his valise so ANDREY is properly looking at him.

MARK IMMORTELL:         Did you say something?

ANDREY expects to be unable to speak again. He hesitantly opens his mouth.

ANDREY:                            (his voice cracks slightly) You… asked me to come, didn’t you?

MARK is taken aback (not visibly) by this honest admission. He (and probably you) expected Andrey to put up a small fight at least. However, this little puppet does not mind his strings being pulled. Mark decides to try and push a little harder.

MARK teleports ANDREY up on stage. ANDREY stumbles a little, but Mark’s valise still being under his chin steadies him. MARK pulls the valise so Andrey’s face is quite close to his again. I don’t know what to do from here, so fade to black.

The way I imagined the dynamic going is Mark teasing Andrey and trying to provoke him. Andrey does get pissy sometimes, but it’s extremely cute and low stakes, like teasing a pet. Then, at some point Andrey doesn’t get provoked which would throw Mark off guard. It’s a moment where two characters are going at each other and suddenly stop, allowing the weight of the moment to sink in. It’s in almost every romance story, but I can’t exactly put a name to it. Have enough of that, and we’ve got a nice rom-com on our hands.

Of course, this is just a theory. A Game Theory…

[bltngames]

Review: Lloyd the Monkey 2

Back before TSSZ News imploded, I would often do write-ups for many of the games at the Sonic Amateur Games Expo (SAGE). SAGE is an annual online expo that I started all the way back in September of 2000. I personally ran SAGE for over a year, and remained deeply hands on for at least another two years as it continued to grow. The main focus of SAGE was primarily to showcase fangames, in particular Sonic fangames, but the event never limited itself to any one type of game. It's never been uncommon to see original games appear in the lineup -- especially now, given the modern indie scene. 

One such original game was Lloyd the Monkey, a bit of a strange game, written in Javascript of all things and run through a webpage. That by itself was notable enough to stand out from most of the games at SAGE, but Lloyd was also a completely original product created by someone who possibly seemed to be young and new to game development. Making games is no easy feat, especially when they’re written in Javascript and you’re doing tons of original artwork yourself. Taken as that whole, the game impressed me, even if it was more than a little rough around the edges.

Now we have Lloyd the Monkey 2, written in Unity. The developer, Noah Meyer, sent me a Steam key in order to review the game. Up top, I just want to say how I think it’s kind of brave to go all the way in putting the game on Steam and everything. It felt like just a few years ago, newer indie developers sort of had to work up to releasing their game on Steam, usually getting a few releases under their belt first. People view games differently when they’re asked to pay for them, and critics may not be so willing to let circumstances influence their review. It can be a harsh world out there for a beginner.

Lloyd 2 is a much bigger, more ambitious game than the first. Whereas the original Lloyd didn’t even have sound effects, Lloyd 2 introduces voiced cutscenes, some of which are full-on animated cinematics. Quality is about what you would expect -- I would assume the developer sought out friends and acquaintances to voice characters in Lloyd 2, leading to wildly varying audio quality due to differences in recording hardware. Lloyd himself sounds fine, but some of the other characters are a bit quiet, while others have clear background noise. Nothing I heard was unlistenable, however. 

The story is also a little hard to follow. Not much is done to refresh our memories as to who anyone is or what’s going on, we’re just kind of thrown into the middle of things and turned loose. On one hand, it’s nice that the story doesn’t slow the pace of the gameplay down too much. On the other, you’re given a map screen with different objectives to clear but there’s very little context as to what you’re doing or why. At one point I made my way to the end of a Power Plant level only to confront what appeared to be an evil monkey. Despite a whole cutscene involving a conversation between four or five different people, this evil monkey never seemed to say a single word. He just stood there in total silence with a sinister smile. Then I killed him.

I suppose maybe I missed something, however. With greater ambitions comes a number of unfortunate bugs in Lloyd 2, one of which happened not long after our monkey and his crew landed on planet Grecia. I entered what appeared to be a castle to talk to the Queen, but I think the game expected me to take a lower route, where I was apparently meant to overhear the Queen making secret preparations before my arrival. Instead, I took the direct route straight to her chambers, and triggered the cutscene with Lloyd standing in front of her while ominous music played, even though the camera was still clearly focused on the next floor down. I apparently still had some amount of control, because midway through her dialog I touched a teleporter that sent me to the game’s map screen before she was done talking. If that cutscene was meant to give context to what I was doing, I didn’t get a chance to see it.

That was one of the more harmless bugs in my time spent playing Lloyd 2. Harder to ignore was the fact that, within the first 30 seconds of getting control, I soft locked the game. Lloyd 2 opens with a short prologue section where you play as a man with black hair. If you decide to ignore the obvious and go left instead of right, you quickly run out of solid level tiles and begin falling indefinitely. Later areas feature invisible walls presumably to prevent this exact scenario, but for whatever reason they weren’t implemented in the prologue. 

For the most part, Lloyd 2 seems to be a co-op game. Many levels see Lloyd teamed up with an alien princess named Lura, with gameplay vaguely reminiscent of Mega Man X crossed with the tag mechanic from Sonic Mania’s Encore Mode. At the touch of a button, you can switch between the Swordsman Lloyd and the more projectile-based Lura… assuming your partner is still alive, I guess. While playing alone, your partner is controlled by artificial intelligence, but it’s incredibly basic and prone to accidentally committing suicide. That wouldn’t be such a big deal (considering Tails in Sonic 2 never acted in self-preservation either), but once your partner dies, they stay dead. Your only option to bring them back is to either restart the stage or hope another cutscene triggers, since they’ll magically spring back to life in order to say their dialog (though, again, usually only seconds before they fall back into the next death pit). 

This might not be much of a problem, depending on your viewpoint. There’s not much incentive to switch between Lloyd and Lura, so once you pick whoever you think works the best, chances are, you’ll just stick with them. You do unlock special team-up attacks after beating each boss, but this just reinforces the idea that Lloyd the Monkey 2 is meant to be experienced with another person holding a second controller, as most of the team-up attacks require both characters to do something specific that the single player artificial intelligence usually can’t interpret. Regardless, the team-up attacks never seem strictly necessary to progress, so they can be safely ignored if you’re playing solo.

I understand this is a pretty negative review I’ve written here. Lloyd the Monkey 2 aims high and tries to the best of its ability to get there. I assume it was a struggle to get even this far. Making games is hard work, and like any skill, takes practice to get good at. Just because this is Lloyd the Monkey 2 doesn’t mean Noah Meyer, its developer, is automatically an expert. I'm sure he's doing his best, and, quality aside, this game has a lot of heart put into it. This isn’t something cheap, quick, or lazy. It’s really, genuinely trying, and that matters. 

I’ve said a few times here and there that I see pieces of myself in the releases of Lloyd the Monkey, and I still see them here. I remember, for an early SAGE event, I was working on a fangame project of mine called The Fated Hour. I was probably already a year or two or maybe even three deep in the game by now, and after a lot of hyping up the community, this was their first chance to play the game. I spent months and months coding this iteration of my engine, and by my standards back then, it seemed like bleeding edge technology. I felt like I was going to blow everyone's minds. 

It was a mess. Few were impressed. Even worse, the game straight up didn’t even run correctly for some people. What followed was multiple patches, and even rebuilding some entire areas from scratch. My ambitions got the better of me and I unintentionally cut corners -- not because I was trying to cheap out on doing proper development, but just because I simply didn’t know any better. I may have done the best I knew how to do, but I was running faster than my body could keep up with and I stumbled.

When I see things like the missing invisible walls in the prologue, or how easily partner characters commit suicide by accident, I think back to that demo for The Fated Hour, and how I've been in this exact place myself. There’s even a side quest in Lloyd 2 where you have to track a floating girl as she drifts through a level -- there was a nearly identical set piece in The Fated Hour, where you were chasing a robot. It’s a very strange feeling to see something like that and think, “I’ve been here before.” Like looking through a window at a younger version of yourself.

It’s true that I stumbled, but I didn’t let that stop me. I learned by doing. I kept going. Three years later, a game of mine was featured on TV, leading to more than a million downloads. The mistakes of past projects did not weigh me down and I soldiered onwards, newfound knowledge in hand. 

So where does that leave us with Lloyd the Monkey 2, then. Well, it's not exactly a game to compete with Super Mario Odyssey, but given the circumstances in which it was created, I don't think that's necessarily the point. As a learning experience clearly made for the fun of its own creation, I think it's a success. And who knows what awaits in the years to come?

[light-and-heartful]

Nutri Ventures - Hulu Kids - Trailer

I always had this idea of an RPG video game based off the Healthy Eating cartoon from Portugal, Nutri Ventures, where it would have the same battle system as "South Park the Fractured But Whole" (a very simple tactics battle system) (they’d even pitch it as the family friendly alternative to that game as well as it would be the world's first Edutainment RPG Video Game), and by the way the battle system would be the same as that game, but the overworld system won't it would be top down, with the same animation as in the show, and even voice acting during the text boxes that you can turn on and off (the voices) at anytime] and it'll be not just for younger players but also older and more experienced players as well, here's some ideas that you can even submit them to Ubisoft (since they're really good with RPGs made in the Western Region) to make it for a game for the Nintendo Switch, so please listen to these ideas and consider them

it would follow the story of the show (with some minor changes to make it follow a game more, but we'll get to that), will have ONLINE Player-VS-Player battles in the form as a device from one of the scientists in Grandland HQ, who's good friends with Theo's Grandfather, that you can find in the Grandland labs & can let you battle with yourself from different universes (aka different playthroughs of the game by different people), it will also have a mini-game multiplayer mode (for offline & online) that has up to four players play the mini-games in the game's story mode such as

the Candy Bowl where it plays just like the show and has the move around the game in a camera view where it focus on the screen moving side to side as it shows them moving in circle while keeping the view front side in a continuous moving track shot (with you passing the Goal Bowl of the game at top at certain times), think of it as like NBA Jam if it was for Candy Bowl

the Pod Races where it's a basic Mario Kart racing game (with two different versions, one that has it just on the ground and you can only turn left & right to race and another where you're underwater and you can move left, right, up, & down to race

the Deep Fryer Rally where it’s like that Mario Party 6 Mini-Game “Treasure Trawlers”, where you move topdown by pressing the L&R buttons together repeatedly and turn by pressing ether L or R repeatedly, and you’d aim your position on the paddle boat in order to try to scoop up the Fried Foods with a crane (but the scoop is a fry strainer) by pressing one of the d-pad buttons in order to score points, and it would use the rumble feature as a way to tell where’s the fry food is in the grease (with the more it rumbles the closer you’re at your mark) the player with the most points wins

the Veggie Games where it features all the events from the Green Kingdom chapter

Jousting where it's a four way Joust (or three way in story mode) where players has to charge into other players in order to take down one of his/her hit points while also controlling their horse, last player standing wins

and the Oracle's Quiz (that game is the final test to get the everlasting fruit in the Orange Kingdom Chapter) where the Oracle gives you questions related to food, cuisine, health, recipes, things like that

and the main feature of the game has the players gaining different status effects happen to them when they eat certain foods that's are each based off of their health benefit, like:

Meat & Eggs give you extra attack power cause it's for force for muscles

Dairy Products give you extra defense power cause it's for protection of bones

Vegetables give you extra maximum health cause it's for healing

Wheat & Grains give you extra mana for attacks cause it's for energy

Fish & Seafood gives you extra Experience Points cause it's for Intelligence

Legumes give you extra turns cause it's for boost

Fruit cures ailments cause it's helps with sicknesses

also I'd change the names of the Bad Kingdoms cause I feel like that's fair

Sugar Kingdom would be the Pink Kingdom

Fats Kingdom would be the Bronze Kingdom

Fried Kingdom would be the Gold Kingdom

Salt Desert would be the Silver Kingdom

(also the story behind the Bad Kingdoms is that the rulers of them were also scientists in Nutri-land, but cared more about making the food taste good rather than being nutritious, this lead to many of the other guardians experiments being ruined and the citizens loving their food but kept experiencing the effects of eating them to much, so the Nutri-Guardians kicked them out, and Alex made them into his main four guys for coming up the recipe for Gen-X 100 when he otherthrew Nutri-land and called themselves the big four, and were a team for a while until Alex had enough of the ingredients for Gen-X 100 to run for years, so they went their separate ways)

there are other features include:

-a pit of 100 trials-esc optional enemy gauntlet where you go through a tower of 100 floors with something to fight on each floor in order to progress, & each 10 floors there's a boss [the first 7 being a hologram of a guardian of a kingdom, the 8th being holograms of the rulers of the bad kingdoms all at once, the 9th being a hologram of Nexus, and the last one being hologram of a younger teen version of Merdock (who looks similar to Theo)] in order to get rare and powerful weapons for each character

-extra bosses in the Orange Kingdom, Red Kingdom, & Green Kingdom chapters if you lose the mini-games of those chapters [like if you lose the Candy Bowl, you'll have to fight Candyman, if you lose the joust Theo has to fight the winner, if you lose the Deep Fryer Rally Theo, Ben, & Lena would have to fight Fritz & Fritz Jr. (but you’ll still get chased out regardless)  & if you lose the Veggie-Games you have to fight, the team leader of the winning team with Lena, Ben, Nina, & Inca]

-the bosses added as the final boss to the chapter include:

the Mind Control machine turning into a giant baker robot in the Orange Kingdom chapter

Jomanda betraying the Red Kingdom by summoning a Hydra to attack the village after the big fight with Alex in the Red Kingdom chapter

a mechanized dinosaur tank that has the big laser cannon that Alex used to almost destroy the legumes on it's head and two small ones on it's arms (kind of like the Barrel Dragon from Yugioh) that the scientists made Alex that'll you'll have to defeat it on the train before it crashes into the castle in the Brown Kingdom chapter

a powered up Alexander Bluebeard who's gone mad with Nutri-Power (like he eats a big platter consisting of a Grilled Shrimp, Bell Pepper, and Steak Kabob, a bowl of Red Beans & Rice as for a Side, and a Strawberry Yogurt Smoothie as a Drink, and this fills his the Nutri-Powers to the max, and will use more foods in the fight to boost his stats) in the Blue Kingdom chapter

& that Two-Headed Dog from the first episode of Season 6 breaking in through the ceiling of the pyramid just as they were forming the Triads of Light & Darkness to attack the heroes in the Green Kingdom chapter

-Some of the timelines would be connected together to match the form of play, in the Red Kingdom chapter, at the end of the section where Theo, Genevieve, and Nose crash into the salt desert and have to reach the dragon, it would have Theo talking to the dragon, and then cuts to Genevieve & Nose waiting near the Volcano, fire coming out the top, and the Dragons coming after them and then cuts to black and you’d to a few moments earlier where it has the Red Kingdom preparing to defend the kingdom and have the big battle between Alex, with a neverending heard of G-Squads coming during the fight, until it’s interrupted with Theo, Genevieve, & Nose coming in riding on the dragon, and Theo & Genevieve joining the battle & in the Brown Kingdom chapter, it’ll have you play through Theo, Ben, & Guardian Brown getting trapped in the mine first, and when it gets to the point where Theo gets knocked out from exhaustion in the desert, then it cuts to earlier in the day where you play as Nina and go with Johnny to find the treasure and as the two fights Curling Stone & Betty, it would be interrupted with Theo coming in still unconscious as his medallion drags him into it, where Nina & Johnny gives him some Water, Theo joins the fight, and the battle continues, and then it would lead to Theo, Lena, Ben, Nina, & Johnny getting together to go deal with the war only when they get there they discover Alex using the weapon he got from his Father’s Diary on the Legumes

-the Pink Kingdom wouldn't do that whole alternate vision thing where everything is good when you're hypnotized but gross when you aren't, it would all look good, smell good, and taste good (which is how they get the people to be hypnotized by it), but still give you the negative effects of eating too much sugar (even when Lena & Nina enter it for the first time, and your playing as Lena you have the option to keep trying the candy from the Mistresses over and over again until you say no and trigger the first fight with the matrons or until a sudden snap happens and it shows that Lena's lost a tooth, and it would lead to her getting so disgusted at everyone's teeth and big bodies that she just yells everyone to stop, and that triggers the first fight between the Lena and the mistresses, with it later in the fight having it introduce Sid as he jumps into battle)

-whenever you are at sea (floating or diving) in the Blue Kingdom chapter, it would have you doing a board game esc movement, where you draw where you want to go, and it will move in that path, and as you move enemies can move in you too and can cause battles, it kind of works like "Star Fox Command" on the Nintendo DS

-the game has you leveling up your party members of Theo, Lena, Ben, & Nina in order to improve their stats, but there's also Guest Party members who can't level up and are part of certain parts of the story or when you find and meet up with them after you completed a chapter (but they'd leave if you leave the area too far), and they include

Sid for the Orange Kingdom chapter (he's a healer like Nina)

Genevieve (or the Black Knight early on) for the Red Kingdom chapter (she's a fighter like Theo)

Johnny for the Brown Kingdom chapters (he's a shooter like Lena)

Alexander Bluebeard for the Blue Kingdom chapters (who's only available when you have your pact with him) (he's a Brawler like Ben)

Inca for the Green Kingdom chapters (she's a shooter)

Fritz Jr. for the Dragon’s Fury Challenge section in the Red Kingdom chapter (where it would have more enemies there than puzzles and traps) & the Submarine and Neptune’s Trials part of the Blue Kingdom chapter (he's a fighter)

and FYI, the different classes each shows different ways of fighting and different weapons, this is the list of them:

Fighters like Theo uses Swords and other Melee weapons and attacks by pressing certain buttons with certain timing

Shooters like Lena uses Arrows and Guns and attacks by aiming at the right target by trying to keep the cursor in the center of the circle as the cursor moves on it's own

Brawlers like Ben uses Shields and Heavy Swords and attacks by holding a button down and letting go in the right time

Healers like Nina uses water to help other party members regain their health, and doesn't need to press buttons to attack

also all each character’s attack moveset would be determined on the weapon they use (which the weapons you can use are determined by a character’s Level an whenever if it has a “G” on it so that Guest Party Members can use it), as it has different attacks and added effects for it, and an added move specific for each character, Theo can get charge his attack for two turns, Lena can analyze the enemy to reveal it’s stats (including showing the amount of Health it has left onscreen), Ben can guard with his belly, and Nina can use her cuteness to try lower the opponents defenses

-the whole quest would have it not only regaining the seven kingdoms but also to find all the stones from the start, not just starting at the end of the Red Kingdom chapter [so in the beginning of the game Theo already has the White Stone but gets it's power after talking to a Kangaroo Rat in Racing Gear as one of the Guardians of the Temple of Nutrition, he finds the Yellow Stone from a tower in the Yellow Kingdom that used to bring the people hope but worn out when Ty-Paw’s army kept attacking, and after a vision with a Journey to the West-esc monkey in the Temple of Nutrition about never give up doing what's right, Theo gets the stone and uses it's powers to defeat the invading army, and in the Orange Kingdom chapter (where it would have the 2nd test be facing the Magician Rabbit from episodes 1 & 2 of Season 6 instead of fruit bats, cause the beginning of the Black Kingdom chapter would have it start with them using Theo’s pendant to power up the Rocket into Space) the Orange Stone is in the tower used to power the Antenna for the hypnosis machine, and after a vision from the Stone Monster in the Temple of Nutrition (when it had the pendant force Theo onto the stone when it looked like he tripped when they were trapped in the iron capsule) where he talks about trusting others and try listening to what they have to say, Theo gets the stone after he and his friends getting free from being locked up in the iron capsule thanks to Guga and uses the power of the stone to turn the Pink Kingdom into a Giant Fruit Filled Garden (as shown by a cutscene of all the buildings from the Pink Kingdom being crushed and destroyed by vines & growing trees and it having a shimmer of light peek from the cloudy skies and keeps growing more and more until the sky is completely bright and blue)], and each time the players complete a chapter and get the stone & gain it's power, you get an extra special move you can do by filling up a gage by doing good button commands when attacking to do special things to happen to attack foes or help yourself (like the Star Spirits or the Crystal Stars from "Paper Mario")

-there would be a travelling chef character in towns all over the kingdoms where you can make different recipes using different foods (which all the kingdoms will have food from all the different food groups from the start, cause they'd like to keep in touch with eachother) to turn and combine ordinary foods you have into better foods to the increase the amount of stats you'd gain (for example, if you have an Egg you can eat for extra attack power, but when you give it to the chef along with a Wedge of Cheese & a Grilled Ham Leg, he'll make it into an Omelette where it would not only give you tons more attack power than a regular egg but also extra health as well and extra defense too) and it will even have a recipe log with tons & tons of different recipes

-and lastly in the beginning of the game when you start a new save file, you may not be able to change the characters' names, but you'd be able to explain a little bit about you the player, including your name, what kind of playstyle you want to do for button commands (which are described by Theo's Grandfather as an Easy Game or to play a Little Bit Harder) so all players can enjoy it, and you'd also put which food group your favorite food is (which will give a slightly more better chance at getting extra stats when you eat a food), and it would be a profile for each time you'd do a PvP battle or play an online minigame with someone, they're kind of like street passes

I just think it would be a perfect fit, don’t you think?

[thegraysquirrel]

Self-Promotion Sunday

For self-promotion Sunday from @mouseymightymarvellous , I would like to bring the following to your attention:

*scrambles to search for anything useful to promote* 

Oh! There was that one time I was making a promotional speech for Obito in the hypothetical situation of Obito in his prime (no Rinnegan though) fighting Shisui in his prime in hopes of convincing people to vote for Obito instead of Shisui! Below the cut, you will find all 3600 words of it... Because go big or go home.

(If I knew how the hell I would put this on AO3, I so would. But. Tags? Format? okay format would be easy probably I have no idea how to get this on there. Title? I know how to jump literal hurdles but I draw the line at figurative hurdles.)

One last thing! You might be asking, “Why?!” and I would shrug. In reality, I don’t like that Shisui’s Kotoamatsukami is regarded as unbeatable in the Naruto ‘verse. Everything should have a weakness and I just exploited my love for Obito as a character to throw him at Shisui and it worked remarkably well.

I will title this: 

Why Obito (who fell through literal cracks and out of reality as he knew it while regarded as dead last and then dead first) Would Beat Shisui (the legend, the martyr, the Uchiha genius that seemed to have it all in terms of skills and abilities)

Okay so I have thoughts and I have to live up to my “commenting disaster” name so here goes. If you ever wanted to know how authors could feel when they got a comment from me, then buckle in. (wow this turned out to be about 2 full AO3 comments, yes, this is exactly how writers will feel upon seeing my comments in their inbox!)

I think it’s a wild guess that Shisui would have been able to manipulate the complete Uchiha clan through Fugaku.

SHISUI’S JUTSU AND WHAT I THINK OF IT

SHISUI’S LIMITATIONS AND LACK OF EXPERIENCE WITH KOTOAMATSUKAMI I don’t think Shisui’s ability has ever been countered or met his match in the short time he spent on the pages of the manga. Shisui doesn’t know how to tell if someone is fighting the manipulation, and he CAN’T know for sure that no one could. Considering he could use it once every ten years and he is younger than Genma, he hasn’t even got a lot of practise with it. He’ll have used it, what, once? So let’s say he used it twice, since he’s got two eyes. 

That’s TWO instances in which he used it—are you honestly telling me that his technique is unstoppable because he used it twice with no one countering? I’m not buying this. We don’t know the limits, and Shisui sure as hell doesn’t either. 

(I’ll admit, maybe it’s 10 years because the crow does not share the Uchiha blood. We can say Shisui could not use it for 2 years for the sake of Shisui, y’know… being able to build a reputation with it. I think Shisui had his Kotoamatsukami when Itachi was 5 years old, so he had it for about 8 years = 8 or 16 attempts, IF he spams his technique the second it comes off cooldown like us gamers do. Otherwise, he used it TWICE at most)

PEOPLE SAY “THIS JUTSU IS IMPOSSIBLE TO BEAT/THIS DEFENSE IS MORE SOLID THAN A ROCK” AND WERE PROVEN WRONG Do I think everyone has the potential to beat Shisui’s genjutsu? Hell no. But we CAN’T just buy the people’s words for it when we have so little data and they actually have little data too. The people Shisui used it on probably weren’t even a challenge in the genjutsu department. Here’s my thoughts about when people say something about a jutsu being *waves hand* without weakness. 

Gaara was said to have Absolute Defence and Sasuke managed to penetrate it when he was a Genin and everyone was like “Whaaaat he got through the Absolute Defence how is that possible??”

In chapter 257, Kakashi says “There is no cancelling the effects of [Itachi’s Tsukuyomi],” but Sasuke still managed to do so later with an ordinary sharingan. Kakashi’s sharingan prowess in dealing with Itachi’s mangekyou sharingan were inferior to that of this particular Uchiha. Sasuke did it by putting a genjutsu on himself to break free of the former genjutsu.

I’m sure there are more instances when jutsus are called “impossible to defeat” only for someone to go in and say, “bitch, watch me prove you wrong.” Naruto did it with the 3rd Raikage, in a way. “Impossible to defeat” means nothing. 

The only thing we have for Shisui’s eye-technique to be unstoppable is his and everyone’s beliefs that it’s flawless. But really, if Itachi’s powerful Tsukuyomi could be broken by an individual Uchiha, then why can’t Shisui’s have flaws that can be exploited (by another Uchiha)? When fighting an Uchiha and it’s one on one, flee, is Chiyo’s advice—unless you are also an Uchiha, I amend, even if your eyes are still basic instead of the premium version. 

CLOSER LOOK ON SHISUI’S VICTIMS Follow me on this wild speculation. (If you’re still reading, you rock!) It was said that a different person would need to question the one under the genjutsu for them to even consider the possibility of being manipulated. Let’s also list off the people we know or assume have been under Shisui’s eye’s manipulation:

Bloody Mist ninjas

More Bloody Mist ninjas

Probably ninjas from other villages they were at war with (I honestly don’t know)

Probably the Elders via Danzo (I’m vague on the details, but very likely right?)

The Daimyo via Danzo (wow that was really a challenge to influence him. Someone without ninja skills.)

Mifune via Danzo

Edo Tensei Itachi via crow instructed by Itachi (well, the eye was instructed by Itachi)

If I look at the list, I’m not seeing anyone who would give Shisui (or the holder of Shisui’s eye) a challenge, especially as Itachi got under control willingly. Just like Kakashi had no trouble fighting Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto in the first bell test, Shisui is on a level most people will never be able to reach.

The last one is the only one we know used on an Uchiha. We can’t actually conclude much or anything from it because Itachi orchestrated the Kotoamatsukami, but it was Itachi himself to make note of the manipulation. He was aware of the genjutsu. So the manipulation was noted.

MY CONCLUSION ON SHISUI He’s got the greatest genjutsu, but here’s the thing—he doesn’t know how to fight against other geniuses of genjutsu. It’s the same with eSports, when you are the best by far, you don’t get the experience against the people who match your skill, and that means you get rusty (YES I stole these words right from of a player in the LCS of League of Legends, be happy that I didn’t throw KICK a soccer metaphor at you) and since this tournament I’m arguing for is a knock-out, any mistake can cost you the tournament. His genjutsu is revered as the best, that it can’t be broken, but other jutsus that have been called flawless have been shown to have flaws that could be exploited. Shisui doesn’t have enough experience to have found them out himself. Shisui will win if his Kotoamatsukami works 100% on the enemy, but it’s less sure if the enemy breaks (partly) free.

But who could possibly have a chance of breaking free from it?

*RECORD SCRATCH* (In my document I had the following in a very big font. I miss my big font. ;-;)

MY ARGUMENTS FOR WHY OBITO CAN BREAK FREE FROM KOTOAMATSUKAMI (And why he can win it)

GENJUTSU AND MANIPULATION Obito is not just passing with genjutsu, he’s GOOD, because he was able to even control Yagura—a perfect Jinchuriki, someone who has a built-in pacemaker, but then a pacemaker for when the brain zones out of reality and needs to come back. He managed to somehow convince everyone that he was Uchiha Madara and he double-crossed the actual Madara too—this dude knows how manipulation works, even if that alone obviously won’t help him against a genjutsu of manipulation (it’s a good thing he’s got his own mangekyou sharingan, otherwise he’d definitely be toast). Still thought it worth mentioning. 

I hear you say, “Madara manipulated him!”

Actually, no, I don’t think he did?

Hot take: (I don’t know enough of the general consensus to know if it is a hot take) Obito was NOT manipulated by Madara.

Madara manipulated the situations, but Obito remained true to himself in reacting to them. Whether it would have been Madara’s super evil plan to kill Rin or if it had been The Leaf’s own incompetence at sending kids into dangerous territory (resulting in the deaths of said kids because the system is SHIT), Obito would have reacted the same. 

Yes, Madara is evil for playing with people’s lives like a kid does with blocks to build a structure, but Madara’s involvement isn’t important to the outcome. I think that Madara was unable to “genjutsu bullshit” his way into Obito’s mind, otherwise Madara would have hella secured Obito’s actions already. If Obito could have been influenced by “genjutsu suggestions”, no way in hell would Madara have simply kept asking Obito angrily, “Bring me to life, Obito, I hate being dead. I can’t become the Juubi’s jinchuuriki like this, Obito. Bring. Me. To. Life. (Wake me up.)”

Madara, feared by the world, didn’t use genjutsu on Obito from what we saw. He fell back on manipulating the circumstances for Obito, and the only reason I can think of that is because Obito isn’t susceptible to Madara’s suggestive genjutsu. 

Every time I watch the Obito and Madara episode, I just see Madara spouting words and Obito indulging the old man until he can get out of here. In my interpretation, the words have nothing to latch onto. When Obito returns, it’s his own choice. Madara’s and Obito’s interests aren’t aligning as much as Madara would like, and as such, Obito remains more than just Madara’s pawn.

OBITO IS HELLA STUBBORN (OOPS AND MANIPULATION AGAIN) ANYWAY, if ANYONE would be able to find a flaw in Shisui’s eye technique, Obito would. HECK, he even managed to keep his mind sound when the Juubi was driving him crazy. Like, that anime sequence when his limbs were torn apart? That thing. This dude got willpower and a stubbornness to follow the path he wants to take even if it’s really a dumb path. I might be easily swayed and manipulated, but Obito is not. Shisui wouldn’t even need his eyes to sway me, but on Obito he would need to give his 100% and, again, I’m not sure Shisui has ever been pushed to his limit, and he ALSO thinks that he’s impossible to beat so he’s not even going to give it his 100% (he might think he is, but you’ll only know how fast you can run when you’re chased by something you really don’t want catching up to you or if your alarm went off too late and you really need to be on time). Against Obito, it’s a flaw for Shisui’s ability that it’s about manipulating his decision, because Obito is a master of manipulation himself. He knows what Madara did to him. He fought the Juubi. Obito would walk into a tree rather than change his mind about what path he should walk.

OBITO HAS EXPERIENCE Obito at his prime also has a lot more experience with his ability, he knows his own limitations and how to use it as a part of himself. He can use it multiple times, he can use it in ways Shisui would not expect... Shisui would need to figure it out fast, and I think Obito at his prime (TWO Kamui sharingan) just has too many tricks up his sleeve for even Shisui of the Body Flicker to keep up with. 

MY SLEEP DEPRIVED CONCLUSION ON OBITO What I think Obito has: he got the stubbornness + sharingan skillz for weakening Shisui’s genjutsu on himself enough or maybe even completely repel it so Obito can actually still do things + Obito’s own mad skillzzz with Kamui. Shisui loses. 

TO CONCLUDE

I’ve got a lot of fanon thoughts (or maybe just my personal fix-it for canon) on Obito that I won’t unpack here (it’s that Obito is actually a genius himself even if it never showed clearly in his years pre-sharingan) because, hey, people don’t like reading 1k of random shizzle when they just want to vote for their boy Shisui! But please give Obito a chance because I feel he actually has a chance!

TL;DR 

Shisui has never been challenged in his abilities (especially not by an Uchiha). He won’t know what his all-out is for this, so he won’t go all-out 

Abilities have been called flawless before only for someone to be “hold my beer” and fuck them up. Case in point: Sasuke practically made Gaara cry

There’s been precedent of an Uchiha with normal sharingan getting out of what is hailed as one of the best genjutsus whereas no one without     sharingan would be able to do that alone (or at all)

Unlike Sasuke at that point, Obito has been a master of genjutsu and has a mangekyou sharingan at the point of fighting 

Obito knows what manipulation is and has even kept to his sanity* when the Juubi was tearing him apart. He has manipulated practically everyone, including a perfect jinchuuriki. He will be able to find a flaw in Shisui’s jutsu because he’s too stubborn to change his mind enough about yeeting (parts of) himself to his Kamui dimension when there’s danger

Obito knows his own ability like the back of his hand, including limitations, so Shisui will have a hard time fighting Obito if his own Kotoamatsukami isn’t winning the fight for him. 

*Okay, so maybe Obito isn’t completely sane, but Sakura wasn’t either when she fought off a jutsu working on the mind. I think Obito’s instability even gives him a cookie point

PLEASE GIVE OBITO A CHANCE I EVEN TALKED MY POOR SISTER’S EAR OFF DURING DINNER BECAUSE OF THIS

LET HER SACRIFICE NOT BE IN VAIN

 ---

(Counterarguments with my own reply I put in that document)

Honestly Great Argumenter for Shisui: my counter argument: Shisui is known as the ultimate uchiha genjutsu master. And hes also the best looking. ;)

         Me: In reply to greatest genjutsu master-- Would you say that Itachi was a greater genjutsu master than Sasuke? Because Sasuke broke free from ITACHI'S genjutsu. I'm not saying that Obito would put Shisui under a genjutsu--it's just that Shisui's genjutsu wouldn't hold as well as it normally would, and that might be enough already.

         HGAS: Shisui would still be faster than obito if we take genjutsu out of the equation completely Minato was able to almost kill obito due to speed so that can't be discounted. Obito had to retreat from his fight with minato.          Me: How old was Obito? 14? (Kakashi and Obito are both 31 at the end of Shippuuden, and Naruto’s birthday is in October, so Obito would have turned 32 in the following February of the war, and THIS means that Obito was 14 during the fight against Minato too, because Kakashi was 14 at the time of Naruto’s birth but Naruto timelines are terrible) I hardly call that his prime! And against Shisui, Obito will have two Kamui, whereas against Minato, he only had one. The fight would be different, I feel.

---

YO BECAUSE I STILL GOT TIME HERE I WILL ADD TO THIS. I warned you, if you feel confused where this is all coming from, you’re probably feeling the exact same things Mumma does at some of my Konoha Files comments. This is how I roll. AND PLEASE IF YOU WANT TO TALK KONOHA FILES HIT ME UP because I’ve got a lot more thoughts on that than on Obito vs Shisui!

EXPERIENCE Shisui graduated any age between 6 and 12, but we know that about two years later, he met Itachi who was 5, and 8 years later he died (I think he died when Itachi was 13 because there was more time between Shisui’s death and the other Uchihas’ deaths). Shisui died when he was between 16 and 22. (I am not familiar with the book canon!)

This means Shisui had at most 10-11 years of experience as a ninja. Yes, one year after graduating he got the Kotoamatsukami, so he got 10 years TOPS with his Mangekyou Sharingan which had a freaking long timer of usage in between, regardless of how many years we put it as; 10 years, 2 years, Shisui would have kept that ace up his sleeve so he would not spam the ability the second it came off cooldown.

Obito graduated when he was 9. At his prime he was 31 years old. That’s 22-23 years of experience for Obito as a ninja! He got his mangekyou sharingan when he was, what, 14 (at the end of shippuuden he is 31, and Kakashi is 31 too, so they might have been the same age—and then the Kyuubi summoning was when he was 14)? That’s 17 years of experience with his Mangekyou sharingan. 

Obito will have had way more battles with his ability than Shisui, way more opponents that would challenge his way of using his ability so Obito KNOWS what his flaws are. He knows what it will be like to fight against someone with kamui! He fought Minato and knows how the Flying Thunder God/teleportation can be used against him (and that was when he had his Mangekyou sharingan for less than a year!). In his battles, even when he was mostly forced to stay in the normal dimension because he needed to get his hands on someone, he has shown that he can slip body parts into his dimension even when he is attacked from all sides. His reaction time is solid (even if he is not because... dimension stuff).

Conclusion: Obito has more years of experience than Shisui at fighting with his mangekyou and more moments of figuring out his own limits and flaws and adjust his fighting style to minimize them. Obito has also had more momentous fights to test out his own abilities, including The 3rd Mizukage, The Fourth Hokage, Copy Ninja Kakashi with Kamui himself, other Uchihas during the Uchiha massacre (they count), Konan, Naruto and Killer B. Seriously, he’s more well-rounded than Shisui!

---

THE MIST Shisui fought ninjas, soldiers of the Mist and was feared by them. Obito won from the strongest ninja of the Mist, the Mizukage who was also a FREAKING PERFECT JINCHUURIKI and kept him under his control for YEARS. I know which feat I think is more admirable. 

SPEED Shisui is hailed for his speed, but the Body Flicker is said “To an observer, it appears as if the user has teleported. It is accomplished by using chakra to temporarily vitalise the body and move at extreme speeds.” Obito has FOUGHT Minato, who actually is able to teleport. This was 17 years ago!!! Obito has improved because he was just a fledgling who even had to figure out how his new arm worked!!! Yes, Shisui is faster than Obito, but Shisui will not be fast enough to pulverize Obito. Don’t forget, the kamui sharingan has the added benefits of being able to predict the opponent’s movements, see chakra, so Shisui’s speed advantage is diminished against any Uchiha.

OBITO’S TECHNIQUE Shisui has no idea what Obito’s technique could be and honestly, passing through him mid-fight is already a scary thought, just think how disappearing from sight and appearing could be. Heck, Obito could probably even be in his own dimension, spit fire, and then long-range Kamui it back to the dimension where Shisui is. The precision of it can be worth speculating, but if Obito can appear on a branch of a tree, then he sure as hell can know where exactly he’d send his fireball jutsu. He just does. He’s got the spatial awareness of the overlap between his own dimension and the one Shisui recedes in. And how would Shisui counteract this attack, huh? He can’t body flicker to Obito’s dimension.

Even if Obito stays in the dimension Shisui is in, Shisui won’t be able to exploit the weaknesses. It took Konan a long time to know what the timer for Obito’s ability was, and Konan had her own ability to exploit that weakness. From what we know of Uchihas fight styles, I am having a hard time figuring out what Shisui could do to exploit Obito’s timer—and that’s only if he can figure it out, which he won’t. No one but Konan has found out about that particular tid bit, to my knowledge.

Let’s say Shisui got a hit on Obito. A hit means contact and he gets sucked to the other dimension. Afterwards, Obito would return to the dimension with food and eat while Shisui starves. Win. I’m a bit fuzzy on the details, but the people who have managed to get a hit on Obito when Obito could use kamui (Remember! Obito could not use kamui when he was the Juubi jinchuuriki!):

Minato with his Flying Thunder God move when Obito was new to kamui, to his arm, and only had his right eye kamui and not his left

Kakashi but that was when he was in the other dimension while Obito was still fighting Naruto. Since Obito vs Shisui is a 1v1, this won’t happen

Kakashi because he used his OWN kamui to get a kunai to Obito. Uhuh, Kakashi got a lot of hits mostly because Kakashi had kamui.

Kakashi again, but that was because it would be hella stupid to phase out to the dimension that had a war going on.

Konan (she was so badass)

I honestly don’t remember more, do you?

Shisui is amazing with his body flicker, really, but Obito can dodge left and right. Shisui won’t get a hit on him unless Obito allows it, because Obito got the damn experience!

With two kamui’s, Obito’s transportation (himself and of others he holds on to) is faster, as we’ve seen when Obito and Kakashi worked together to move Obito to his own dimension. Obito’s speed has increased with two kamui’s. 

SHISUI’S TECHNIQUE Shisui is a softy. I’m sorry, but he is. Aoba lived to tell the tale because Shisui wanted to scare them off with his genjutsu instead of killing them. Danzo was put under a genjutsu by Shisui and Shisui thought it was enough even when the genjutsu was done (and then Danzo managed to take an eye of BODY FLICKER SHISUI, so hey, his speed ain’t gonna be the end of it all). Shisui relies on his genjutsu deterring people—that’s obviously going to be his go-to move, and it means he can be caught off-guard when it’s not as effective.

He’s good at Taijutsu (or at least, he would win every spar against Itachi but Itachi was 3-9 years younger, so…), but even Taijutsu master Gai didn’t manage to land a hit on Obito when he used his nunchucks--would Shisui really be able to do what Taijutsu master Gai could not? 

Another TL;DR

Shisui simply doesn’t have the tools against an Uchiha as experienced as Obito. Obito’s ability is a different kind of OP than Shisui’s because Obito knows how to use it as a part of him, whereas Shisui’s ability is something he has relied on very heavily because no one has countered it yet. Obito will find the weakness in Shisui’s “strongest” genjutsu and be able to win from Shisui because of all the battle experience against talented individuals Obito has had. Obito managed to unite the five nations all on his own, he was THAT powerful.

We’ve said before that Shisui is on a different level from practically everyone, but honestly?

Obito stares down on Shisui from his god tier level 

*mic drop*

[likefromtheoffice]

What I Had To Do - TLoUII SPOILERS

I started feeling compelled to write a deep reflection on The Last of Us Part II when it became clear I was going to be playing as Abby for quite some time. Like everyone else, I imagine, I had made up my mind about Abby almost immediately. She would die, and I would be the one to do it. I didn’t want to play as Abby, I wanted to not move the controller and just have her die. But the game makes the choices here. 

Of course, knowing Naughty Dog and expecting the level of quality I did from this game, there was certainly a reason we were slated to spend so much time with her. While I ultimately came to respect this choice, it was plain to see that the game was going to attempt to change our minds about Abby, to show us how she came to be the person she is and how she was driven to do the things she had done. For this reason, I was not engaged in Abby’s story. Because, like I said, I’d already made up my mind. 

The brilliantly-handled revelation of her father being the surgeon the player is forced to kill in the first game was enough to fully humanize this woman who, in the space after she kills Joel up until she is hoisted in the Seraphite noose is surely the most viciously despised character on Playstation. Even though I kept the difficulty low in order to breeze through her portion of the story, I admittedly did eat my words: “If they can change my mind about Abby, I’ll be shocked.” My mind was changed just about as much as Abby’s heart changed throughout her ~10 hours of game time. She ends up doing almost exactly what Joel does for Ellie for a very similar reason, although Lev’s brain can’t save the world.

When I found Abby at the Pillars, I had already decided that if the game were to give me the option to press Square to kill Abby or circle to let her live, I’d smash the circle button. When Ellie says “I can’t let you leave,” I thought to myself, “yes, let’s actually do let her leave, but we probably should fuck her up a little bit, right?” Fuck her up we did, but of course the game isn’t base enough to trivialize the story it’s told over 20+ hours by letting you funnel out all your rage with a button press, completely destroying Ellie’s and Lev’s lives with a single click.

So ultimately, Abby’s segment shows us a lot about the world we’re living in inside this game, and the metaphor of warring clans with their own agendas and perspectives very directly reflects the distilled personal motivations behind Abby’s and Ellie’s actions. I said a hundred times that Abby’s section was too long, and I think I’d drastically shorten the first act. I don’t think we needed to stroll through the base and see kids taking classes in an attempt to humanize and raise the stakes for her. When we’re forced to play as her, we are not interested in what is happening. You could start with information about Owen and the coming attack on the Island. A lot of Abby’s section felt like Druckmann knowing that we need more hours for $60. But this may have been because until Lev’s mother dies in her cabin, I still wanted to watch her die.

This is where it all changed for me, except for the feeling that her segment was still too long. One thing this segment does perfectly and to hopefully great and continued effect, is to show us--more than the game already has--that LGBTQI+ stories are now a part of our human experience, and these people will be in the stories we tell. And it won’t be a fucking big deal. “Do you want me to ask about it?” “No.” 

I was able to stay almost entirely blind to the promotional materials for Part II. When I started the game at 11pm CST, I knew only that there was a guitar, there was a fight in a shopping area, and there was a real bad person cutting a hanging guy’s stomach open. I was also able to avoid anyone’s conjecture about the game, but in seeking the opinions of others after I’d completed it, I’ve discovered the bizarre criticisms about the narrative. Namely, being forced to play as Abby for so long and having “social issues” shoved in their face when they’re “just trying to play the game.” I had a problem with the Abby segment even after I began to see its purpose, but eventually it cracked me open in the way it intended. In making me do the things she’d done, I was of course forced to fully realize her perspective from the moment we’re put over her shoulder instead. But the latter issue is what bothers me to no end, and it’s upsetting that we’re still here as gamers.

If someone has a problem with Ellie’s sexuality or coming of age, Dina’s sexuality, Lev’s gender identity, or the fact that all our main characters are women, then the only hope I have for that player is that they might see themselves in Seth. Seth is the physically oldest character we see in the game, and he is the only character who has any problem with what he’s seeing. He’s alone in his bigotry and he is weak. He will die very soon and he will do nothing meaningful before then, aside from being forced to make free steak sandwiches for those he has hurt by those who are in power and do not take his side. If this hypothetical--although very real--player fails to make this revelation and turn this corner, if that person still disapproves of the story being told, my question to them would be: “did you accidentally buy this when you meant to download Call of Duty: Warzone?” If you’re not playing the game for the story, you should just play a game where you’re always shooting things. If you are playing the game for the story and you have a problem with the story, also fuck off to Call of Duty. I use Call of Duty here because it’s mainstream and not objectionable and you are holding the trigger through most of the game where the story doesn’t matter if you don’t want it to, not because I have a problem with its playerbase or the games themselves.

The dissent I still cling to is that it’s difficult to ratchet intensity upward and keep motivation high when you know the character has to survive because you’ve seen a future piece of the story--especially when you don’t want them to survive. This was most sharply upsetting when I was still playing as Abby after she shoots Jesse and Tommy in their heads. I felt like tossing the controller and quitting. The only reason I can think of for this choice is that the trope of unwinnable fights in games exposes the guts therein. For me, though, this exposed them even more. I would rather have tried very hard to kill Abby and then have her overpower me with those cannon arms and watch the devastating Dina scene play out. It’s what I wanted just then, and was undoubtedly what Ellie wanted. This would have aligned me more with her, the character who I would still side with instantly and unquestionably. It was so strange to fight Ellie’s AI, particularly because the computer does not play her like I do, and for the only portion in the entire game, she was not human. I understand what this rigid perspective attempts to illustrate, but the choice still puzzles me greatly. 

While I am still able to see why the game did it and why it was necessary, there was no way I was ever going to care about the Jackson Crew. This made playing with Manny and Mel very frustrating. Owen’s meta-perspective philosophizing about how none of the clans are actually any different from each other was interesting, but it was not touched on for very long, and now seems to only have been there to benefit Abby’s journey toward her own perspective-altering events. I see this as the only other true failing of the game, although I don’t have any idea how it could’ve been done differently. Aside from being shorter.

            The reason everyone hates playing as Abby is because very few narratives have ever fully explored the other side of a conflict, and for us to be forced to see that, to play as The Bad Guy for so long, is something we’re absolutely going to hate for a long time. It does, or it should if you’re paying attention, eventually do exactly what it’s supposed to do. When Abby becomes human, we can then say that we’ve experienced the story up to that point. We are almost never shown this, much less forced to do it. 

Another thing I’m stuck on but can’t suss out is the theme of pregnancy and innocence. Of course, an unborn baby is completely innocent even in an overgrown hellscape. Where this is most effectively employed is when the knife is at Dina’s throat. “Good.” Maybe the most terrifying line in the whole pair of games. It shows us the depth of hatred these women have fallen to, and how, like the player controlling Joel or Ellie or Abby in parts I and II, when we have to survive, it doesn’t matter what’s going on in anyone else’s life. If we feel someone has wronged us, we take everything from them and don’t consider the consequences. This game does show us our own actions very plainly, and the ultimate consequence could not have been more beautifully shown than in the final chronological scene in Part II. In following her own anger--combined with Tommy’s--she has damaged her connection to the very reason she followed it. She cannot play the song she shared with Joel without wounds appearing in the music itself. 

Ultimately, the story told here is about violence. Why, how, and when it is employed, the unexpected casualties thereof, and how it changes the world for everyone connected to it. Love, hate, survival, revenge, and so many more. Joel protecting Ellie ended a lot of lives--starting as duty and perverting into misguided redemption and love. Abby avenging her father ended a lot of lives--starting as revenge and ending as duty and love. The cyclical implication is very clear as we come to blows between the two rowboats, although it is--like many other gigantic story moments--masterfully left un-hinted-at. If Ellie were to have held Abby under the water for a minute more and Lev were to survive somehow, we’d have ourselves a Part III for almost the same reason which started us down the troubling path of Part II. Can you imagine Ellie looking into the boat at a broken and unconscious Lev? Would she have felt something similar to looking over the bars of JJ’s crib?

What a lot of games don’t bother to explore is what violence takes away from those who employ it, no matter the reason for their doing so. When Ellie walks away from the farmhouse where her family used to live, leaving the last object connecting her to Joel there at the window, I was devastated, as I’m sure we all were and as I’m sure the storytellers intended. Through the deeply troubled feeling Naughty Dog left me with, I was searching for meaning, like Ellie was after seeing those giraffes: “After all we’ve been through. Everything that I’ve done. It can’t be for nothing.” What was it for? It seemed like it was going to be difficult to determine when the credits started to roll, but when it appeared to me, I was embarrassed it had taken me so long to figure out. Everyone was led to their devastating conclusion by the same driving force: love.

There’s also been a fair bit of talk about how bleak the outcome is, and how hopeless everything seems. This observation comes down to how deeply we’re hit by Abby’s boat disappearing into the fog as we sit entirely alone, physically and emotionally less than we’ve been so far, and how the ending and outlook of the whole game isn’t really what we want right now because our world doesn’t need a lot of help in the bleak category. Of course we want everything to work out, and we are so used to video games giving us what we want. Tragedy doesn’t cater to the wants of the audience, and the weight of this tragedy is gargantuan. What a knee jerk dismissal of the story would rob you of is the incredible contrast. I finished the game eight days ago and I’ve probably watched the dance scene at least once per day since. How gorgeous. “Oh, Ellie…” says Dina. To feel this moment fully, knowing its the beginning of a beautiful thing that can’t last, is a gift rarely given to any audience or player. It does so much so deeply in 3.5 minutes. That scene in itself shows us that this isn’t what we’re used to, and the bit of Joel and Ellie’s interaction we get in that scene also demonstrates that the things we care most about are not okay right now. We were Joel more than Ellie in the first game and we protected her. We saved her. We want to continue to protect her.

But the decisions Joel made in the hospital guaranteed things would never be okay. What is it that these folks want from the ending? “You killed Abby! Congratulations! Ellie went on to found Joel Miller Memorial Research Center, where a cure was eventually reverse-engineered from a culture of bacteria extracted from Ellie’s intestine. Dina eventually forgave Ellie, and invited her to live with her and JJ inside the walls of Jackson where they dance, free from hatred and despair, every Thursday night.”

It’s hyperbolic, sure, but what a fucking waste that would be. What we have instead is a seemingly insurmountable sorrow which wraps around a glowing core of warmth and beauty which we’ve seen firsthand throughout both games, begging us to discuss and reflect and analyze and feel. Is the ending really entirely hopeless if Ellie puts down and leaves behind the guitar which attached her to Joel? I don’t know if she’s wearing or still has the watch, I’d have to see the cutscenes again. But she’s walking away from it, finally. What could she be walking toward?

Finally, there is one piece of storytelling after the credits, not a cutscene or a piece of text. The iconic title screen rowboat which we assume Ellie rides away in is replaced with its twin, dragged up onto the shore near Abby & Lev’s beached fishing boat. I’m having trouble putting what I believe this means into words that don’t sound too disgustingly sunny, but if Abby and Ellie, these two veritable destroyers are now free from the searing chains of revenge, and we’ve seen their allegiances shift and their hearts fundamentally changed, imagining the good they’re capable of isn’t too terribly difficult a task. That’s disgustingly sunny to even type out, but I believe it’s supported. It’s very clear that at this point, both parties deserve and have earned peace, inside and out.