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sio-writes · 2 years

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A Botanist’s Guide - Chapter 7

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Author’s Note: Thank you all so much for your patience! Here’s a little early/bonus posting since you were all such good sports while I was in the hospital. After this, it’s back to our normal every other week schedule, aaaand yeah! My askbox remains open, feel free to come in and say hello. There’s a few tags for this chapter, nothing major, but please take care of yourselves first! I hope you all enjoy :>

Tags (spoiler-free): A character strongarms and minimizes the issues of another; mentions of past abuse; violence through mild self-injury

If you’d like context/spoilers for the tags feel free to message me and I’ll give you the full run-down <3

Cassie

I'm not ready to face the day. I'm ready to crawl back in bed and hide. I can be patient, I can wait it out. It's a coward's move, sure, but it's the safest option. Anything is better than confrontation.

Sleeping last night proved impossible. I was tossing and turning, throwing my sheets aside in favor of staring up at the ceiling, frowning so hard I should probably be worried about wrinkles. My mind wouldn't stop churning out ideas, feelings, it was like an engine with too much fuel. I couldn't turn it off. All night, I worried over today, what would happen, how it would go. Would Kri report me? Would I lose my lab? Or would it be a return to normal?

The brain worm was more optimistic. I tried to ignore it, but closing my eyes and seeing a reunion, a happy ending, dare I think it--a confession? That'd be beyond impossible, but I'd latched onto it and ran.

Kri would say the exact right thing, something like, "You're all I've ever wanted, you're all I think about," and he'd say it so matter-of-factly, like it was obvious from the start, and I'd go, "Why didn't we do this sooner?" And then we'd kiss in the greenhouse and wrap his strong arms around me, keeping me safe and secure before sweeping me off my feet.

My stupid imagination is going to be the death of me.

I'm frowning at my cafeteria coffee as Jillie slides into the bench next to me.

"Okay girl, spill."

I'm too distracted to give her a response, but I'm sure my expression is absolute misery. I pick up my coffee, swirl it in my hand, and sigh through my nose.

"You two fucked, didn't you?"

That snaps me out of it. "Jillie!"

She holds up a placating hand, the other is currently wrapped around a breakfast burrito. "Just tell me where so I can avoid those spots!"

I sputter, "That's not--! We didn't--!"

She gives me a scrutinizing look. I fumble for another moment, then let my cheek fall into my hand. I try not to sound disappointed when I say, "No, we didn't fuck."

"But you wish you did?"

"What--?! No, I--" I wither under her gaze. "I don't know."

Jillie's eyebrows shoot up. "You don't know."

Instead of answering, I look away, chewing on my bottom lip. The thought had crossed my mind, more than once. Part of me was ashamed--but a bigger part of me was intrigued. Four arms can do a lot.

It certainly would've made things easier, more straight-forward. One and done, get it out of my system. It worked back in undergrad when I was crushing on a TA. Then again, we wound up dating for six months afterwards.

I need some clarity. Raising my hand, I hold out my pinky. "No judgment?"

Jillie holds out her hand, pinky extended. "Promise."

It's a back and forth we started at NASA, friendship strengthened by a girly ritual. We ask for total honesty from one another, and in exchange we offer complete acceptance, the benefit of the doubt.

I smile at Jillie's hand, and interlace my pinky with hers. With a sigh, I start.

***

Jillie sits back, letting our hands fall apart. She interlaces her fingers and looks at me over their tented form like a doctor would a patient. "Can I be completely honest?"

I grimace, "Oh god."

"Nut up or shut up."

I open my mouth to respond, excuses rising easily to the surface. But seeing Jillie's hard expression has me thinking better of it, and I close my jaw with a click.

She's got a point, I can't argue that. Even just rehashing what happened, speaking it out loud to a one-woman jury, put things in perspective. I definitely have a big fat crush, but I'm also over-thinking things. What happened yesterday wasn't a huge deal, even if it feels like one. Something definitely shifted between Kri and me, but I don't know in what direction, and not knowing is killing me.

Something must show on my face, because Jillie's expression softens. "I can't tell you what to do hon, god knows I've tried, but this is tearing you up. You should talk to him, at least clear the air."

I chew on my lip again. "But I'm scared."

And that's just it. I'm being a big baby over nothing. Putting on my Capable Scientist Pants should be the name of the game, but I'm hesitant. I hate conflict, as small as this one is. I'd rather call out of work for a day or so and come back to everyone when this all blows over. But that's not an option, not with the Milestone so close.

"How about this," Jillie says. "You see how today goes, try and get a moment to talk to him, and go from there."

That's a solid plan. Open ended. Easy to avoid. I nod, and that seems to settle Jillie.

We finish eating and walk to the greenhouse, Jillie filling the silence with observations, keeping me up to date on everyone in the lab. Diana had a date that's apparently the talk of the office; some beefcake named Harrison from Humanities that asked her out. We both agree he's not up to par.

I haven't been on a date in over two years. I miss it; getting dressed up, going somewhere I've never been before, hell, even the nerves of getting to know someone was fun. Unless the date themself was crappy, and I've had my fair share of those.

The conversation does its job of relaxing me as we switch from subject to subject. I can focus on something else, at least for a little bit. Jillie's always been good at distracting me when I need it, taking my focus away to something else. During training whenever I'd have panic attacks over evaluations, she'd always say something stupid to make me laugh.

But then we turn the corner and my back goes rigid. Kri's waiting for us like always, and I don't know what I expected, but I wasn't prepared. My mind goes into overdrive. I'm not ready for this, I'll never be ready for this. Confrontation is taking me out at the kneecaps one horrible interaction at the time.

"Good morning," I say too loudly, raising a hand in greeting.

Kri responds with a short wave, and I feel heat creeping into my face. I hear Jillie snort next to me and I elbow her in the ribs.

I avoid both their gazes as I scan my hand to open the door. Summanus is in desperate need of a severe, localized earthquake right here in front of the building to swallow me up and keep me in the mantle until I turn into a diamond.

Jillie pats my shoulder and pipes up, "So Ant-Man, Cassie told me you were a little helper while I was gone."

I'm going to kill her. Murder on the Outpost Express. I'd be totally justified. Maybe Kri would help me hide her body. That's what friends do.

In my peripherie, I see Kri straighten, whether from the commentary or her nickname, I'm not sure. "I apologize if I overstepped."

"No! Not at all!" There's so much sugar in her voice it has me rolling my eyes. "Any chance it'll happen again?"

I push past the two of them, through the open door and towards the back table. I have a job to do, damn it, I can't afford to waste any more time.

"Unlikely. You've returned, so my help is…unnecessary."

I try not to feel disappointed. I wasn't expecting any help--he's not wrong, it's not really necessary--but part of me wanted to see what the three of us would be like together. If it would be as smooth as just Kri and me alone.

Jillie blows a raspberry. "Nonsense! We'd love the help, right Cass?"

"Uh-huh," I grunt, still waiting for the ground to swallow me whole.

Everything feels distant, like I'm hearing the conversation from a mile away. I'm too big for my clothes, my steps are too far apart. My fingers tap against the table as I look over the samples, until my gaze lands in the corner and I freeze.

It has to be a trick, my eyes have to be playing tricks on me. I squint at the planter, and my face working through a range of emotions, from suspicion, to disbelief, to shock.

I find my voice and shout, "Holy shit!"

"What?" Jillie says, alarmed. I hear her rush up behind me, peering over my shoulder, but my eyes are glued. Glued to the tiny little sprout of green pushing it's way out of the dark dirt. It's small, so small, with two perfect little leaves reaching towards the sun.

It's not a trick. We have plants.

"Holy shit," Jillie gasps beside me.

A smile stretches across my face and I grab Jillie's hands in mine. "Plants, Jillie! Plants!"

I start bouncing on the balls of my feet, energy thrumming through my veins like electricity. This is huge, this is monumental. We broke the ground! Something actually grew! I throw my arms around Jillie and we both break out into equally girly screams.

I'm so happy I feel like I could fly. I need to do something with my hands, so I untangle myself from Jillie and wrap my arms around the nearest body--it's definitely Kri but I don't care. I'm too elated to think of anything else. I ignore how he tenses under my touch, too high on endorphins to acknowledge it.

"Congratulations," Kri says as I let him go. He's pointing at another planter, and I follow the line of his hand to see that--yep, there's another little sprout in Planter #13-B.

I scream a little, leaning over the table to shove my face towards the dirt. I'm definitely leaning over more of the samples, though, so I quickly slide off the table and back to the floor.

I can grow things! I can grow things and they survive! Not just any old shrub or succulent, but actual, useful plants!

This is big. I'm three feet off the ground with how happy I am. Who cares about interpersonal relationships when there's science to do? Not me!

It takes us a while to calm down but when we do, Jillie and I count thirteen little babies in the dirt. With a sample size of over two-hundred, it's not great, but it's only the first growth. There's more coming, I can feel it. I give them all names, writing them down on sticky notes and pasting them on the side. It's dumb, sure, but I'm a little dumb. Gotta have my fun somehow.

"Hopefully tomorrow there'll be more," I say, marking the planter numbers down on a notepad, next to a new list of tasks now that we've broke ground. I add measuring, new watering and soil parameters, and try not to dread the extra pictures I'll have to take. Well, that Jillie will have to take.

Kri's delicately holding a planter up to his face, eyes narrowed. "Why is this one named after me? Are you going to kill it?" Jillie snorts behind me.

"I named one after all of us!" I point to planter #69-M. "That one's Jillie, and this little bastard is me." I pick up the planter labeled 'Cassie,' #34-F, and hold it to my cheek. "You gotta name 'em, it's good luck."

A voice chimes in from the open door. "Aw, did you name one after me?"

My stomach lurches, and I nearly drop Cassie Jr. on the floor.

Stephen's leaning in the doorway, arms folded, backlit by the sun like an angel. The kind that brings death.

"What do you want?" Jillie snaps.

Stephen tuts, shaking his head. "You're always so testy. Can't I visit my favorite girls?"

"No," Jillie says flatly.

He flips his stupid hair and waltzes in like he owns the place. He's wearing obnoxious blue running shorts and a dry-fit t-shirt. His dark hair is plastered to his forehead and his normally pale skin is flushed. "I was on my morning run and I heard screaming."

Jillie scoffs. "That was half an hour ago."

He shrugs. "I got here as fast as I could."

Jillie replies, voice heavy with sarcasm, "Well, thank god you made it."

I can't move, I can't speak, I can't even process what's happening. Why is he here? Why now?

Stephen turns his attention to me and my blood turns to ice. "How goes your little experiment?"

"Fine," I manage. "It's--"

"God, have you been keeping your hair like that?" He walks up to me and I'm stepping backwards without thinking. My back hits the countertop and he's suddenly a few steps away. It's already too close and yet he continues forward, arm outstretched.

"What's wrong with it?" I say, voice clipped.

"How do you even wash it?" he says, pulling a strand of baby hair between his fingers. I jerk my head away, but his hand follows my movement. "It's gotten nappy. It was so much better when you ironed it." His fingertips are like ice against my temple. For years I'd straightened my hair because he said he liked it that way, regular keratin treatments that fried my follicles but kept it pin straight. Letting it curl back up had been one of the first steps in getting rid of him.

My eyes flick over to Kri, and he's staring at me, expression unreadable. Stephen follows my gaze, blinking like it's the first time he noticed Kri.

"Ah, there he is! The auditor. Stephen Langdon, it's a pleasure." Stephen sticks out his hand. "You're the one keeping an eye on my Cassie, yeah?"

Kri looks down at Stephen's hand, and I wince. We were all told to accommodate the initial Ento greeting of a bow, that it was held in high regard and anything else was seen as a huge insult. Stephen holding out a handshake could prompt Kri to kill him. Which, I have to remind myself, would be bad.

After a long, uncomfortable moment, Kri extends one lower hand and clasps it with Stephen's.

"Khri'asxu. I am the auditor."

Stephen fumbles through Kri's name, laughing nervously. "I'm so bad with your guys' names. Can I call you Kri? Or Axu?"

Kri narrows his eyes. "Pronounce my name or do not address me."

Shrinking away, Stephen mumbles, "Jesus, you're intense," and I see his arm move like he's trying to take it out of Kri's grip, but Kri won't let go. Stephen manages to yank his hand away, expression tight with pain as he subtly flexes his fingers. "So, you're a botanist like my Cass, huh?"

Anger flares, hot and electric underneath the roiling waves of anxiety. Stop calling me that.

"I worked on several seed dispersion and allocation experiments," Kri says plainly.

"What got you into auditing?"

Kri blinks slowly, and I see he's holding his lower hands behind his back, one hand tightly clasped in the other. "Promotion."

Stephen turns back to me, and his gaze feels like slime as it rakes over my body. "You got a real hardass here, Cass."

The tension in the room is so thick I can pour it like gravy. My anxiety is spiking with each frantic beat of my heart, and I want to run out of the greenhouse screaming.

My people-pleasing instincts kick in. Stephen's not responding to our hostility, maybe if we're nice, he'll leave. I offer a nervous smile. "You're telling me."

Stephen smiles back, easy, and it feels like acid down my spine. "He's been like this all month?"

"Yep," I laugh anxiously. "Since day one."

"No kidding," Stephen says, stepping back towards me. No, go away. "I told you about my buddy who had an audit from an ento, right? Worst experience of his life, but it was the kick in the ass he needed."

I laugh, high pitched and tense. My eyes are locked on Stephen, like prey being cornered, and he's all teeth right now.

"Why don't I stick around and help out? You girls have a lot on your plate here."

Jillie pipes up, "No, no, I think we're good."

"Why don't you let the leading woman speak. What do you say, Cass?"

"Oh, I don't know. The greenhouse isn't really built for four--"

"Oh come on! I promise I'll be more helpful than him." He hooks a thumb over to Kri, who narrows his eyes.

"I really don't think--" I glance to the door as he takes another step. My back hits the countertop. My heart is pounding a mile a minute.

"What, you want me to go? I can help!"

"N-no," I say, voice small.

"No?" He says, incredulous. "What do you mean, no? What, you're gonna kick me out?"

Tears well up in my eyes. "No, it's --I--"

Suddenly, Kri is blocking him, his back to me. "I believe Cassie has work to do."

"Stay out of this." Stephen tries to go around, but Kri extends a hand and grabs Stephen's shoulder, and Stephen stops dead. He tries to wrench himself free once, twice, then meets Kri's gaze. There's something in it that gives Stephen pause. In a final movement, Stephen rips his shoulder free, and peers around Kri to look at me. "He calls you Cassie?"

It's like I've been caught; shame wells up inside me, but I'm frozen to the spot. I stare resolutely at the ground.

"If you insist on remaining here, you will need to stay out of their way," Kri says.

I feel like a kid standing between two grown-ups. Unable to speak, unable to move, unable to help.

A heavy moment passes with my heart in my throat. Stephen looks ready to fight, Kri's standing like he's about to throw Stephen through the window.

Stephen finally spits out, "If that'll make you feel better." When he steps to the side, I feel the tension in my shoulders melt.

***

It's quiet the rest of the day, tense enough that every step I take feels like avoiding a landmine. Stephen wanders between posts every handful of minutes, and each time he moves, my heart lurches. He examines Dr. Markesh's hybrids, the seedlings in the opposite corner, and every time he passes my sprouts I want to block him like a linebacker. He tries to strike up conversation with Jillie, who gives him one word replies. He doesn't try to talk to Kri again, and whenever he walks up to me I pretend to look busy and ignore him, but that doesn't stop him from talking. Commentary, snide remarks, pointed witticisms only he thinks are funny. And they're all directed at me.

I want to tear my hair out. I'm reminded of the early days with Kri, the needling, the criticism, and the stress that came with it all. Except I can't bark back. Something deeply ingrained within me is acting as a roadblock, and I clam up whenever I open my mouth. Stephen makes a remark and I shrink down. He comments and I turn away. I don't want him to start yelling, making a scene like he always used to. I don't like to think about the later days of our relationship, where we fought every day, where he tried to keep me from my friends, where he needled at my appearance. But this is bringing it back. It was hell, and leaving felt like cutting off an arm. An infected arm, but still an arm.

I realize part-way through the day that the yelling was never an issue with Kri. Even in our most tense days, he never raised his voice, never once indicated he could overpower me, which he very much can. He's only ever talked to me in that even, accented tone or something gentler and soothing. It gives me a new appreciation for his temperament, and a new annoyance at Stephen's posturing. Kri hasn't said anything since this morning, buried in his clipboard not looking up once.

So the day continues on.

I'm piping water into a test tube when Stephen's condescending voice catches my attention.

"You named them? That's so cute, so you." I turn around to see he's by the samples, and it's like he's picking up my baby. Loosely, between pinched fingers.

"Put that down!" I rush over to the samples, reaching for the single one in Stephen's hand.

"I got it," he laughs, holding it up and out of reach. He'd better put my plant down or so help me--

"Stephen, please." I reach for it again, balancing on my toes.

"I said I got it!"

He takes a step back, his foot catching on the concrete, and I watch in slow-motion as his grip on the planter falls. Laser focused, I reach for it, missing by an inch, helpless to watch as the planter hits the ground upside down, soil flying everywhere.

Anger, white hot, presses against my skin. My hands ball into fists; I want to throw something, but I'm frozen. Frozen and staring at the label on the side of the planter. Her name was Nellie.

There's no way that little sprout made it. It landed directly on top. She was too little, too small.

Above me, Stephen scoffs. "See what happens, Cass?" He raps my head with his knuckles and my anger flares. "You gotta think, silly."

My voice is barely a whisper, "Out."

Stephen leans into my view, and his easy smile has me seeing red. "What was that, Cass?"

"OUT!" I scream, snapping my head to look at him and thrusting my pointed hand in the direction of the door. "Get out!"

His face drops, angry. "What?!"

Jillie speaks up, "You heard her, Ass-Hat. Leave!"

He stomps, like a child. "I have every right to be here!"

As if out of thin air Kri appears behind him, resting a heavy hand on his shoulder. "I believe they spoke very clearly."

Stephen tries to wrench himself free and fails. "You can't make me leave!"

"Yes," Kri says, tone threatening. "I can."

Stephen waffles, looking between Jillie and me like we're going to offer support. "We were getting along so well. All this over one stupid plant?"

I see Kri's hand tighten on his shoulder. "My main objective is assuring this project runs without delay, efficiently and to completion. Your presence here effects this end. Now, before this becomes violent, please exit the facility."

Stephen looks to me, eyes pleading. Some stupid part of me wants to help, diffuse the situation, but it's overpowered by the anger coursing through my veins. If he doesn't get out right now, I'm going to punch him in the face, and probably get fired for it.

Kri lets Stephen go, and we all watch him angrily huff his way to the door. In his haste, he hip-checks the center table and a glass falls off the end, shattering on the floor.

"Oops," Stephen says sarcastically before turning the corner out of the lab. I grit my teeth.

After a moment, I stomp to the door, heading outside. I see Stephen's retreating form, looking every inch a toddler throwing a tantrum, but somehow it doesn't make me feel any better. I'm just…angry. Pissed.

Excess energy is making my hands shake. I need to run, I need to rage, I need to do anything to get rid of this stupid, stupid sitiuation.

I need to punch something.

My eyes land on a tree between greenhouses, and I'm rushing towards it and before I can think my fist makes contact. The impact reverberates up my arm, pain exploding from my knuckles up to my shoulder, but I don't care. Hell, it makes me feel better.

So I do it again.

And again.

Each swing I make only draws more anger out from me. Each hit goes harder, and I can feel my skin splitting on the rough bark but again, I just don't care. The pain is grounding, something to focus on. It’s so much easier than dealing with emotions too big for my stupid head.

Why wasn't I more aggressive? Why didn't I tell him to leave earlier? I shouldn't have folded like a fucking paper napkin. We'd still hve thirteen plants if I had manned up and told him to leave.

I hear a voice behind me, "Cassie?" but I ignore it, fists hitting this defenseless tree, my vision still red.

"Cassie!"

Hands grab both my biceps, pinning them against my torso. At the same time one covers my eyes and another wraps around my waist. I struggle against a tall, solid body, anger making me impatient.

"Let me go!"

Kri's voice is right next to my ear. "Breathe, Cassie," he says, voice pitched down.

I struggle for another second before the fight leaves me and I go quiet. The anger leaves as suddenly as it came, the remnants of it fizzling through my nerves like firecrackers. In it's place comes nothing, a big empty void of feeling that sounds like static in my brain.

"Breathe," Kri repeats, and I take an unsteady inhale. It's not quite as deep as his, and my exhale is even more shaky. Kri makes a subtle clicking noise that I can feel through his chest. "Very good."

Warmth spreads from my chest, and his breathing is easier to match. Breathe in. Then out.

"You're doing well." His voice is like the tide, pulling me in, drawing my mind away from what it wants to do, which is freak out.

After another breath, I'm aware of the blood dripping down my fingers, the excess pain coming from my knuckles. God, what a stupid move.

The hands on me gently lift, as if afraid I'm going to start again. "I'm going to grab the First-Aid. Wait here, please."

In a brain fog, I turn my back to the tree and sit down, exhaustion pulling at my limbs. Kri comes back with a small beaker of water and the First-Aid kit, and I watch from a distance as he washes off my hands. The disinfectant stings, but it's gone in a minute.

I cast around for something to say, the silence eating at me.

"I thought you were going to kill him after that handshake."

Kri shakes his head, hands working to wrap my knuckles in a long bandage, all four moving independently. His fingers are gentle as they move my hand back and forth. "We do not hold humans to our standards. We were briefed on your major greetings after initial contact. They are confusing, but adaptable."

Jillie appears behind him. "Not gonna lie Kri, that was pretty hot--Cass!" She rushes to my side. "What happened?!"

I mutter, barely audible, "Punched a tree."

It takes a second for Jillie to process what I said, looking from Kri wrapping my hand to my miserable face, and then she bursts into giggles. "I thought you punched Ass-Face! Are you alright?"

I nod, and she audibly sighs, clapping me on the shoulder. "You wasted a good punch, girlie."

"Several good punches," Kri adds.

"Next time aim for his huge forehead."

"I agree with Dr. Masters," Kri mumbles, delicately moving my finger to wrap around it. "However, your human noses are much more fragile."

"Call me Jillie, hon," she says with a grin.

"Jillie." The pronunciation sounds closer to 'shilly', but she doesn't say anything, only smiles at him and stands again. "I'm gonna go clean up poor Nellie in there, holler if you need anything."

"You can head on home, Jill," I say.

She turns concerned eyes to me. "You sure?"

"Yeah," I offer a smile. "I got it."

Looking to me, then to Kri, then back to me, Jillie's face dawns in realization the same time it hits me what I've just done. I've isolated the two of us. I've run out of reasons to not have that horrible conversation.

Behind Kri's back, Jillie mouths, Talk to him! And points exaggeratedly before turning around and walking off.

***

I pick up the plant that was Nellie and hold it between my fingers. She was a cherry tomato plant, in a few weeks she'd have been delicious and juicy, and now she's fertilizer. So much potential, wasted. Now there's only twelve sprouts.

I try not to cry over spilled milk, but sometimes that milk meant I got to keep my lab. Now it's all over the floor, or more appropriately, in my hand. And it was knocked over by a stupid, stupid man who screwed me over, acts like nothing happened, then comes by just to cause problems because he thinks he has some moronic claim over me.

Rotating the plant in my fingers, I think that maybe he still does. I froze up like a deer in the road, unable to do anything for myself as he spoke over me, touched my hair, and knocked over my plant. And I did nothing. Jillie and Kri had to do everything. They're the ones that ushered him out, I just tried to play nice. Because I'm a coward. The bandages around my knuckles pull when I rotate my hand. All Stephen's caused me is pain.

I sniff, the sound loud in the small space of the greenhouse.

"Cassie," Kri's hand lands on my shoulder as a tear rolls down my cheek. I turn, because what else is there to do, and Kri makes a distressed noise in the back of his throat when he sees my face.

"Come," he says, pulling me close. I sniff loudly, feeling the tears fall down my cheeks. I rest my forehead on his chest, warm and comforting.

"You hate me," I sob.

Arms come around me and I'm trapped, but that's okay. "Why would I hate you?"

"I said mean things about you today," and now I feel like I'm the toddler. "And now you hate me again."

"I have never hated you," Kri's voice rumbles in his chest.

I sniff loudly. "Liar."

"I have also never lied to you."

"Even before? When you first got here?"

He pauses, thoughtful. "Your work ethic annoyed me at times, but only because I expected you to do things in a manner that was not conducive to your workflow. Although, I will admit," he huffs a laugh, a big hand resting between my shoulder blades. "I do question your taste in music."

My smile is small, but feels huge. "Hey. I have great taste in music."

"Jillie has called it archaic. You've mentioned your grandparents listening to it as adolescents."

I bring up my fist and thump the side of his chest. "No one here appreciates me."

The hand between my shoulder blades rubs up and down in a slow, soothing motion, and Kri chuckles. "I could not hate you even if I tried." He rests his head on top of mine, and I tentatively bring my arms around his middle. They wind up underneath his lower arms, closer to his waist, but that's alright, I just want to feel the warmth. And I do, like a hum underneath my skin.

"So…we're okay?"

"That was never in question."

I swallow hard, and make zero effort to move away, even though this has gone on much longer than necessary. This is so much more soothing than anything I could've done on my own. My heart isn't racing, the tears are drying, I could sink into his embrace that smells of rain and fresh dirt. I feel warm all over, radiating out from his hands on me. I need to bottle up this feeling and sell it to myself.

Kri clears his throat. "You have been stressed, lately."

I scoff. "That's an understatement."

"I've noticed you seem to get--what is the word--in my tongue it means one who does not dislike their current position, but wishes for variety."

My brows draw down. "That sounds like being stir crazy."

"I'm not familiar with that term."

"Same thing. And yes," I exhale a laugh. "I think I'm going a little crazy."

But there's nothing to do that I haven't already done around the Outpost. They have two of what I call Capitalism Districts, full of places to shop, eat, experience things. Last time Jillie and I went, we did the new escape room. But they haven't installed anything new in a year. Obviously that's not the Outpost's fault, it's gotta be expensive as hell getting anything done out here, but I've been through every shop, eaten every menu item imaginable, and experienced everything the districts have to offer.

Leaving on my own isn't an option either. With only two arms, humans can't drive any Summanian vehicles, and the stuff we can drive only goes as far as the magnetic field of the Outpost. The local terrain is rocky and uneven too. We're situated in a valley, surrounded by massive trees taller than the buildings, with a handful of roads in and out that lead into the desert.

So it's a bit of a hassle to leave without help of some sort.

Kri pulls me back to reality by stepping away. I miss the warmth, but he levels me with that intense stare of his. "Would you like a break?"

I grimace. "I mean yeah, but where would I go?"

Kri's wings flutter, and he looks away, his hands coming behind his back. "I have business in Igrien this week-break. Would you like to join me?"

My eyes widen of their own accord. A trip outside? Out of the Outpost? I've never been before. It's easy to leave, just fill out a few forms, but not very many have gotten to do it.

There's new animals to see, I've heard ento cities are gorgeous, and there's so many plants! So many new and alien things to experience, and Kri's offering me a chance!

I narrow my eyes, wary. "You're not inviting me out of pity, are you?"

He tilts his head, making that clicking noise. "I don't know that term, so no."

"Doing it because you feel bad for me."

His brow draws down. "I wouldn't insult you in such a manner."

"I feel bad piggybacking."

"But I've invited you."

"Yeah, but you were gonna go alone."

Kri shifts his weight, and looks away. "If you don't want to go you may say so."

"No--no, I do!"

His gaze snaps back to me, eyes bright. "Then it's settled. We will meet here at ten-hundred."

Chapter 8>>

#A Botanist's Guide #my writing #exophilia #alien x human #teratophillia #alien writing #monster romance #alien boyfriend #well not yet #but we're getting close!#he finally asked her!! I'm so pround of my long son #he's taking ari's advice to heart and teseting the waters #trust me he's as nervous as she is #he's just better at hiding it #ento don't have dates in the traditional sense #but he's definitely been looking up how to have a human relationship and that was the first thing that came up #he's also definitely looking up How to Kiss Your Human in his spare time ehehe

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red-elric · 1 year

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we need to do more with pro vb player tsukishima temping as a museum worker

#it me #tsukishima kei #imagine you go to your local museum and one of the tour guides is 6'6 and JACKED #hes got curly blonde hair and glasses and a soft sweater but he can lift his 6'3 boyfriend with one hand (kuroo btw)#everyone who works there has a crush on him but theyll never let him know bc hes SO mean. hell glare at you for talking too loud #buff and nerdy in one big and tall package lfg

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strykingback · 1 year

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One Long winded lecture later.

“THUS do we come to the conclusion of how fusion energy is applied to science! Any questions?” Krieg asked.

“Ayo Doc... next time keep THE FUCKING LECTURE AT LEAST ONE TO THREE SENTENCES LONG!!!!”

Louvel.exe has stopped working....

#[The Guiding Wolf- Louvel]#[A Strykers Edge- Blade]#[The Visionary Genius- Krieg]#//Yang and Weiss come get your boyfriends #//their heads are hurting #[Random Talking In The HQ- Dash Commentarty]

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imnotnewipromise · 2 years

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my boyfriends opinions on girl guides (from the opinion of a scout)

"while high school kills creativity, guides kill childhood enjoyment,, you aren't allowed happiness in guides"

#girl guides #scouts are better #bucket brain #convos with my boyfriend #big mood #neurodivergent #pride #lgbtq #just your casual gays #gay gay homesexual gay #we are both gay as hell

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studiopeached · 4 months

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YOUR BOYFRIEND ft. Route Guide

♡ WARNING: below the cut contains SPOILERS for the Your Boyfriend Game. Please note content for day 4 of the game is not allowed to be posted publically yet. Guides will be up until day 3.

if you are a Patreon of Inverted Mind INC, please contact me privately for a continued guide on Day 4 for all posted routes.

♡ ESCAPE BY CAR ROUTE:

Day One

What?! No!

I guess thats understandable.

No Ill be fine.

Day Two

…

Split it.

Wait who are you?!

Day Three

Okay okay Ill date you, just dont hurt TK please!

…

Run for it!

You're watching...

#peter your boyfriend #your boyfriend #your boyfriend visual novel #your boyfriend game #your boyfriend peter #your boyfriend yn #your boyfriend guide #your boyfriend fandom

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phantomrose96 · 2 months

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With the Reddit 3rd party app crackdown and the ongoing horseshit Elon Musk is pulling with "X", I realize a lot of people here might be pretty new. So I put together a quick and easy guide for using Tumblr for anyone new who might need it.

Tumblr was made by David Karp and we call him Daddy around these parts (^///^)

You are not safe from fandom-gif attacks ( •̀ ω •́ )✧

Speaking of fandoms, the tumblr fandoms are always ready to grab their [object] and go to war against the Beliebers ╰(*°▽°*)╯

The only safe refuge from fandom tumblr is with hipster tumblr. If you can get a cool alt-girl to take you under her wing, you might be safe... for now (●'◡'●)

You will watch the first episode of Supernatural... and then you're part of the Winchester family. (Or if you skip right to season 4, we don't blame you. It's where Destiel starts (*/ω＼*))

This is not a glomp-free zone ☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

Use missing e. It's the only way to make Tumblr useable on Internet Explorer (this is the most popular browser and you're probably using it right now) :-D

Our only adult-supervision is John Green... and even then does that REALLY count as supervision? DFTBA! φ(゜▽゜*)♪

Just this once, everyone lives. It's bigger on the inside. Elementary, my dear Watson.

If you see Misha Collins staring at you, the polite response is "Saving people, hunting things, the family business." O.O

I might lose followers for this, but this blog supports gay rights, and yours should too (14 gifs of Sherlock and The Hobbit)

Tumblr will teach you more about the world than you'll ever learn in school. ○( ＾皿＾)っ

Tread carefully... we have teh yaoiz O.o. Oh you don't know what that means? Well let's just say... it's full of lemons here.

If you see Hannibal Lector in a flower crown, tell him it looks very nice. His boyfriend Will Graham made it for him. (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

Do not enter the dog park. The dog park will not harm you.

#sorryz ill finish this post later my doctor says he needs to urgently check me for radiation poisoning

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cats-in-the-clouds · 1 month

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my sister got engaged and we’re all really happy for her but my bitter rain cloud of a dad (who naturally she told last) is giving her a bit of passive aggressive grief about it despite her boyfriend being like the best man of our generation (presumably either because he’s not catholic or because my dad sees them as young dumb unemployed people who aren’t ready for marriage or because he’s mad he barely has any real love with his own wife or something). so like pray for us? i wish i knew what to do

#if my dad had any brain cells or observational skills whatsoever #he’d realize that in terms of our faith the problem is not the boyfriend. that guy is brilliant and open minded and would probably ace RCIA #the problem is my sister. who is catholic in name but it’s clear to me how hard she’s fallen away from the faith #but like my dad has created such a bitter home environment we never have meaningful conversations with him #so like he doesn’t know *anything* about our inner lives #all he sees is labels. all he judges people by is labels #literally you can still get married in the church to a non catholic it’s just a matter of expecting them to convert eventually #and promising to still live according to the principles of the church and raising your children as such #but my parents are absolute fools if they think that’s the issue. if my sister was true in her faith her bf would have converted already #i am sure of it. the guy is smart he just needs to be guided the right way #evidently my parents don’t realize that about him either #if my dad could become a decent parent for once and stop trying to drive his kids away from the faith by only cherrypicking the parts of it #that intersected with republican/conservative boomerisms #ugh. if he was a virtuous father she’d be a virtuous daughter and therefore all her friends and loved ones would be virtuous as well #should i blame my dad for all our family problems? no.. not rightfully……#but like. the impact a father has on one’s life cannot be understated #ugh i’ve had the sense for a while that God wants me to be the one to fix this family #because looking around it doesn’t look like anyone else is gonna do it #but that’s such a daunting task… especially alone… i don’t have any true friends (ie who share both my faith and life experiences)#and like. it’s really hard to try to assume the role of a teacher or counselor when someone is older than you #or uh. in a position of direct power over you for that matter. esp when clearly deeply mentally ill #the concept of trying to essentially parent my own parent while i myself am miserable and unstable #esp when he is the primary cause of that #just. ughhhhh it’s such a vicious circle #like i’ll do this if i have to i’ll undertake that daunting mission but i have to be so careful and really sort myself out first #or for that matter if i were to volunteer to like. catechize my sister’s boyfriend (heaven knows she couldn’t do it)#i’d have to really study my stuff bc i think the intellect is the only real appeal here #like i said tho his conversion can probably never really happen as long as my sister remains the way she is #what i know is that the first step is fixing myself. i have to be a pillar of virtue if i wanna stand as any sort of authority on the faith #problem is i suck and shouldn’t be regarded as a role model for anything. i have the knowledge down but that alone won’t fix me

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fairy-angel222 · 4 months

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𝐓𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐓 𝐅𝐔𝐂𝐊 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𐙚˙⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩

—your boyfriend does not appreciate you, but his uncle toji does.

pairing: toji x fem! reader

content: smut, cheating, unprotected sex, choking, petnames, praise, a little degradation, toji’s hot ass has tattoos, belly bulge, cumming inside you

You couldn’t really pinpoint when things went wrong. When your boyfriend just lost interest in you. You couldn’t even date back the last time you had been fucked. Simply turning his body when you tried to start something, or using the excuse that he wasn’t in his mood and that you needed to stop being so needy.

But how could you? You just needed to feel something. Anything. You were so tired of using your fingers when he left for work. Or the shower head on your clit when you showered alone, which was now always.

Your relationship was failing, but you couldn’t find it in you to break up with him.

You were quite confused when your boyfriend invited you over for a dinner at his parents. Getting to meet all his family as he introduced you with a wide smile, hands on the small of your back to guide you from person to person.

There was somebody who stuck out like a sore thumb. And you couldn’t take your eyes off of the man was probably twice your age and most definitely twice your size. Tall, broad and muscular with tattoos of all shapes and sizes trailing down his neck and onto his toned arms.

You swallowed hard, ignoring the heat you felt in between your legs as you ogled the greek god infront of you. With his messy black hair and dark eyes, a smirk spread across his handsome face as he tilted his head to stare you down. Hands in his pockets as he strolled towards you, your hand gripping your boyfriend’s shirt as you felt yourself getting smaller and smaller under his gaze.

“Now who’s this pretty thing?” The deep voice questioned, looking down at you with the subtle bite of his lip as he let his gaze run over your figure. “You’re not gonna introduce your lil ole uncle to your girlfriend?”

Your boyfriend scoffed, rolling his eyes and pulling you closer into him. “I have no need to. Now beat it.”

You frowned at his harsh tone. Toji’s hands raising in defense as he chuckled. “Just trynna be nice.” His smirk widening when he turned to face you fully. “Now, what’s your name doll?”

Your knees grew weak at the deep rasp of his voice, avoiding eye contact when you felt yourself face getting hot. “uh.. y/n, my name’s y/n.”

Toji hummed, grabbing hold of your hand and bending down to place a kiss to the back of it. “Pretty name for a pretty girl.” He winked.

“Okay that’s enough. You can go now.” Your boyfriend fumed, your eyes never leaving the older man’s as he took his leave, leaving you with a short. “Nice to meet ya, doll” before he walked away.

“We’re leaving.”

Your eyes widened at your boyfriend’s words. “What? Baby why? Your family seems so nice we can’t just leave.” You tried to convince him.

“We can when you’re looking at my fucking uncle like he’s a five course meal.”

You resisted the urge to scoff, maybe you wouldn’t have to if he did what he was supposed to. “I promise you, i wasn’t. Now let’s at least enjoy an hour for dinner before we leave. Okay?”

Your boyfriend only scoffing before shrugging your arm off of him and walking away into the kitchen.

Great. This was just what you needed.

The dinner was awkward for you. Your boyfriend wouldn’t talk to you and kept glaring at his uncle. Who only added fuel to the fire by sending short smirks your way, his muscles flexing as he ate.

You couldn’t help the way your face flushed, fidgeting with the food in your plate as you bit down on your lip.

“Y/n, dear? Are you okay?” your boyfriend’s mother asked in genuine concern. “You have barely touched your food honey.”

You gave her a smile. “Sorry, i’m just feeling a little sick right now.”

“Oh dear, would you like to go to the bathroom? Darling, show her the way.” his mom insisted. Your boyfriend not even sparing you a glance when he spoke, “I’m sure she knows the way, mom.”

You sighed, a piece of you missing the relationship you once had. Giving a tight lipped smile and assuring her that you knew the way before getting out of your seat and heading to the nearest bathroom.

You stood staring at yourself in the mirror, rubbing at the bridge of your nose while telling yourself to get your act together. You gasped when the door swung open. A smirking Toji closing the door behind him and leaning onto it, his hands crossed over his chest as he looked you in the eyes.

“You know, for a girl pretty like you, you sure are stupid.” He laughed, “Don’t you see you deserve better than my scumbag of a nephew?” Closing the gap between you two until you were backed up against the sink’s counter.

Toji’s hand reached up to stroke gently under your cheek, trailing his finger across your lip as he bent his neck to look down at you. In turn looking up at him through your lashes when his other hand held onto your waist.

“You gotta know how a real man treats a lady. How a real man fucks. You want that doll?” Waiting for your shy nod of approval before sitting you on the cool marble top. Your legs hooked around his waist and your hands gripping the counter’s edge when his rough lips met yours. Kissing you hard before trailing soft bites down your neck, careful enough to not leave any marks.

You let out a moan, Toji’s hands moving to peel off his shirt so his rock hard abs were on display. Grinding lightly onto the hard surface with a whimper at the full sight of black ink spread across his pale skin. A grin on his face when he went back to attacking your neck, hand slipping under your dress and pressing against the heat of your panties.

“This wet for me already? I’m flattered.” His fingers making their way to rub between your folds through the side of the fabric. Collecting your wetness before dipping a finger into you. “Think you can take it doll? You’re so fucking tight. Practically a virgin again, how long’s it been since you were given a good fuck?”

You truly didn’t know the answer for yourself. Only moaning as Toji pulled off the lace material, spreading your legs wider and pulling his thick cock out the confinements of his jeans. You whimpered when Toji stroked his length, the size being bigger than anything you’d seen before. “‘S alright, ‘m gonna mold her round my cock.” he groaned, lining up with your sopping hole before slowly thrusting into you.

“Nnhg— so big, T-Tojii— can’t take it.” you mewled, Toji’s hand latching over your mouth to muffle your pleas as he forced himself deep into you. “Gonna make it fit doll, just sit real pretty for me and take it yeah?”

You nodded with a shaky moan, your pussy stretching to accommodate his thick girth as he bottomed out inside you. Grunting heavily at how tight you were around him, his cock so deep that he could see himself bulging in your stomach through the thin fabric of your dress.

Toji started off slowly. Your moans increasing in volume as he sped up. The burning sensation turning into nothing but pleasure as he fucked into you, ricking your body back and forth with each thrust.

Toji’s hand fell from your lips, the tattooed skin finding itself wrapped snugly around your neck instead. His cock grazing your gummy spot as he leaned into your ear. “This is exactly what you need doll. Need me to fuck that pretty little pussy so good.” he grunted. “Exactly what your dumb boyfriend failed to do.”

You could only let out a cry, your smaller hands holding tightly onto the arm around your throat. Digging your nails into his flesh as you moaned out into the air. Your lips parted in a string of mewls as the older man’s cock pierced deep into the depths of your insides. Fucking perfectly into your g spot before bullying its way to the entrance of your cervix.

The unfamiliar sensation making you cry out even louder as your head fell back. “T-toji- ahh— so good Toji, feels s’ good.” you cried, your legs trembling around him with curled toes.

“Careful now doll, as much as i would love for him to hear me fucking you right, there’s other people out there.” he teased, your pussy clenching when your eyes met his. Your eyes glassy and your head fuzzy as you were fucked into oblivion.

Letting out a whimper when his grip tightened unintentionally on your throat. Drool falling past the sides of your lips as your eyes fixed on his v line, up to his abs then further until you reached his face. Finding his dark irises staring back down at you hungrily before pulling you closer to him.

His large body swallowing yours when he pressed you up against him. Your moans and cries getting noisy again as you felt yourself getting close. “Tojiii— nnh, ‘m so c-close, ahh— gonna cum.”

“Yeah doll? Close f’ me? Gonna make a mess on this old man’s cock?” he rasped, broad hips still rolling hard into yours as he watched your mouth hang open slightly, your eyes rolling back before closing completely as you reached your high.

Body shaking and pussy spasming around him as your pussy held onto his cock like a vice, letting out a choked scream muffled by Toji’s knowing kiss as you came. Squirting messily onto his cock with the quiver of your hips.

“So fucking hot.” Toji groaned as he pulled away from you. Your breathing noticeably heavy as he fucked you through the aftermath of your orgasm. “Fuck, gonna cum. Where’d you want it?” he breathed.

And you let out a mewl as his thrusts grew sloppy, veiny cock twitching against your walls as he got ready to release. “Fuck, gotta hurry up and tell me doll.”

“Nnhg— inside, want you inside.” you moaned, “C-cum inside me.. please.”

Toji’s pupils dilated and his grin grew wide. “You’re a slutty one in disguise aren’t ya? ‘S my pleasure baby.” His thrusts becoming merciless as he slammed into you. Using your pussy to stroke his cock as you choked out little cries at the fast pace.

“Fuck, gon’ fill you up so good.” he panted, “Gon’ stuff you so full that you’ll be begging to be my good girl again.” his cock throbbed, “Shit— there we go, that’s it doll.” Spilling spurts of his hot cum into your cunt. Making you moan at how easily he filled you up.

Toji gave his final slow thrusts before he was pulling out of you, letting his cum seep out as he helped you put back on your panties. Trapping his seed deep inside you with a hum. “Feel better doll?” he smirked, giving you a short kiss to your lips and laughing as you tried to not let him go.

“Come back to me when you gain some sense and drop that asshole, okay? I’ll be waiting.” Pulling his shirt back on and tucking himself into his boxers, giving you a wink before trying to fix his hair. Your eyes glued onto his back as he walked out the bathroom door.

Leaving you touching your lips that just felt his tongue. Your heart beating faster before you were startled by hard knocking on the door followed by your boyfriend’s voice. “Can you hurry up in there? You’re making my mother think you’re dying or something.”

You closed your eyes and let out a breath, thoughts of Toji plaguing your mind and keeping you calm. “Coming!”

#jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader smut #toji fushigro x reader #toji x reader smut #toji fushiguro smut #toji smut #toji x you #toji fushiguro #jujutsu toji #toji x reader #jjk toji #dilf toji #toji fushiguro x reader #toji fushiguro x reader smut

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belovedmusings · 3 months

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Am I Playing All Right Now?

Kento Nanami x You

Explicit Smut 18+ (🚫Minors DNI🚫)

Kento Nanami has been your respectful, loving boyfriend for two months now. All you’ve done so far is kiss, and you want more with him. He refuses for your sake, warning of his roughness. So, you take matters into your own hands and convince him to put in ‘just the tip’.

Relevant tags: just the tip challenge, dom! Kento Nanami, clothed sex, couch sex, clit slapping, brief use of leather belt, hard and rough sex, doggy-style, hair pulling, manhandling, big dick-Nanami <3, dirty talk, degrading, unprotected sex, creampie, I don't use "y/n" for immersion

Music recommended while reading: Dollhouse (The Weekend, Lily Rose Depp, …baby one more time (The Marias), Like U (Rosenfeld)

A/N: this is filthy and I love it, my first Nanami piece <3 enjoy!! (Read on Ao3 if you prefer!)

Read below cut:

The night had gone great. You two had a fantastic dinner at a fine restaurant, and now you’re at his house, getting hot and heavy on the couch. You’re sat in his lap, straddling his waist, the hem of your dress riding up your thighs as the fabric gives to accommodate him between your legs. Your hands are running over the muscles of his chest, only the thin layer of his dress shirt between your touch and his skin. His palms are on your waist, pulling you closer, pressing you so firmly against him that you can feel the blunt heat of his hard cock beneath the confines of his slacks.

You can feel adrenaline pumping through your veins–tonight is the night. Every time you two get close to having sex, he pulls away, saying he isn’t ready, but right now it feels so different, so electric–

He hums, punctuating the kiss and pulling back, giving you room to breathe. Your stomach sinks, no, this isn’t what you want, you want–

“We should stop here for the night,” He murmurs, and you look into his eyes, a frown tugging your lips down at their corners.

“But you’re hard,” You protest, “Kento, please…we’ve waited long enough, and you clearly want this…”

His jaw tightens as he takes a breath. “I do…but we can’t.”

Now you’re just confused. “...can’t?”

He sighs heavily, giving you no explanation, but nodding. “Now, let’s m–”

“No, hold on,” You interrupt him, “Kento, tell me why? I-is it me? Do you…not want…?”

“It’s definitely not you,” He dispels quickly, “It’s me, okay?”

“What about you?” You press, searching his eyes. “Is it…are you…worried about your performance?”

That gets him to widen his eyes a fraction in surprise. “N-no, it’s not that. It’s…alright, look, it’s…it’s that I don’t want to hurt you.”

It isn’t enough of an answer for you. “And…what do you mean by that?”

“You…you know me to be this nice, gentlemanly man, don’t you?” He asks, a sort of resigned weight to his eyes. “Which, I am. But not when it comes to sex.”

The wheels turn in your head. “So…you’re…?”

“I’m rough,” He finally states, “And it’s…it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. I’m afraid to hurt you or scare you away. Of course I wouldn’t do anything you don’t want, but…you just seem so sweet and–”

“Woah,” You stop him in the middle of his sentence. “Do you think you’re the only one with duality? You don’t think I can be different in bed? Do you think I’m some porcelain doll you’ll break if you’re not careful?”

He considers this for a moment before sighing. “You don’t understand.”

“So then make me understand,” You challenge him, running your hands up his chest. “Please, Kento. I can take it.”

“No,” He denies, “You don’t know what you’re asking for.”

Seeing his hesitance, you decide to switch tactics. You reach for his hands on your waist, taking his wrists and raising his palms up to the front of your dress. You guide them to rest over your breasts, allowing him to touch them through the thin cloth. You’d decided not to wear a bra for the night since the article had thin straps, and he immediately can feel that, a flash of desire flitting within his eyes.

Riding the wave of his interest, you tell him, “I want you bad, Kento.”

He inhales forcefully, allowing himself to knead the soft flesh beneath his hands. His thumbs graze over your hardening nipples, your teeth dragging over your bottom lip instinctively. To drive your point home, you grind down on him, the only thing on beneath your dress being the panties you’d hoped he’d see when you had put them on earlier in the day.

“You’re playing dangerous,” He warns, voice thin and strained.

“Maybe I want dangerous.”

He finally lets out a groan, surging forward and capturing your lips in another kiss. It’s more forceful this time, and all you can do is give complete control to him.

He flips your positions so smoothly, you hardly feel it; you just suddenly feel your back hit the cushion of his couch, a gasp pushed from your mouth. His hands make quick work sliding up your dress, fingers hooking underneath your waistband.

Kento speaks against your mouth lowly. “Lace?”

You swallow hard, nodding. “Yeah.”

“Expensive?”

The question catches you off guard. “Uh, no, not r–”

A swift, harsh tug and the sound of fabric ripping later, he holds the scrap lace in his hand, now mangled and unusable. He just tore them clean off.

“Holy shit,” You breathe, now suddenly aware of how bare you are beneath your dress. He must become aware of that fact too, because without a moment to spare, he’s pushing the article up to your waist, exposing you to his eyes. A rosy flush spreads over the bridge of your nose as he looks at your naked lower half unabashedly, a type of hunger you have never seen before nor known he was capable of in his eyes.

He tosses your ruined panties to the floor and fiddles with his belt, undoing the buckle. Your gaze follows his movements, watching his hands expertly tug the leather strap from its loops in his pants.

Then, he surprises you by holding the edge without the buckle and running it along your inner thigh. You shiver, observing him and wondering what his next move will be. He runs it all the way up, reaching the apex of your leg and placing it right over your mound. The cool leather feels unfamiliar there.

“Can I?”

Your attention is pulled to his voice, and for a moment you aren’t sure what he means. Then it dawns on you.

Oh.

No one’s ever done that to you. But…you aren’t opposed. You’re curious.

You nod.

“Words.”

Oh, damn.

“Yes, you can.”

“Good girl.”

You don’t have time to pay attention to the rush of hormones that praise gives you, because a harsh sting of pleasure suddenly hits your senses as he brings the end of the belt down, slapping your clit with it.

“Ah!” You jump slightly, shock, arousal, and fascination flooding you all at once.

“How was that?” He asks, watching you carefully. You take stock of yourself…and are intrigued to find that you liked it. As soon as you realize that, you understand that Kento is about to show you an entire new world previously unexplored to you.

Your eyes lock with his. “It was good.”

A mixture of relief and desire swarm his gaze. “You liked that?”

“Yeah.”

Without warning, he does it again, a little harder, and you cry out this time, unused to the strangely welcome sensation.

“Still good?”

“Yes.”

“Good girl.”

Your next breath is shaky. “More.”

He wastes no time in delivering exactly what you want. Over and over again, until your pearl is red and swollen and the folds beneath are glistening with need, belt shiny with a bit of it. He stops once you reach this state, making sure you see as he licks it off the belt. Your lips part, entranced, and he drops the accessory, instead moving to undo the front of his slacks. Your heart begins racing–but then he pauses, seeming to deflate slightly.

“I’m not gonna go all the way,” He states, “I don’t have condoms.”

“What?” Your voice is more than a little indignant. “But…how?”

“I wasn’t planning to do this tonight.”

He pulls his cock from its restriction in his briefs, pushing his waistbands down to the tops of his thighs, and the sight of the thick, red shaft as your mouth watering and your core pulsing around nothing.

You think he’s changed his mind as he lines it up, but then he just glides it against your folds, coating it in your essence and using it to rub against you, the feeling intense due to the sensitivity of your previously abused clit, but not what you crave.

“Kento,” You whimper, watching him rub himself off as he plays with you using his cock. “Please…”

“We’re not risking a pregnancy,” He maintains, “It’s not wise.”

You are beyond frustrated at this point, entrance weeping for attention, and you swear the desire is so bad you can feel your entire core sore and empty, vying to be filled and stretched.

What can you say that will get him to do it, even just a little bit?

Wait. Just a little bit.

“What about just the tip?”

His eyes narrow. “What?”

“Just the tip,” it comes out needier than you had intended, but god damn it you’re horny and all out of shame twice over.

Kento takes a good look at you, at himself and the position you’re in, sucking in a controlled breath for the umpth time that night.

Then, he lines up again, cockhead pressing against your entrance. “You’re going to regret asking for it.”

Is he challenging you? Whatever. What. Ever. You’ve reached a point where if you don’t get his cock soon your heart may actually give out.

“Let me decide that.”

His jaw sets tightly before finally, finally, he cants his hips forward, pushing the tip of his shaft inside of you.

As soon as it’s in, your head falls back on the couch, hips starting to roll without your permission. Your body wants him all on its own, and you’re no longer in command of it. He groans, pulling out and then pushing it back in, only the tip again, and you whimper in half bliss and half frustration.

You want more.

You understand the true meaning of temptation now. You’ve had the first bite of the proverbial apple, and it’s shocking how eager you are to devour the rest to its core.

Everytime he pushes in, never going past the smooth head of his cock, you moan, wordlessly begging for more. There’s a worry in his brow and a tenseness to his jaw that indicates just how much self-control he’s exercising, and as you look up at him, you realize he’s still pretty much fully clothed—his tie is pristine around his neck, shirt fully buttoned up, only his dick out and vulnerable to your eyes.

It’s unfair, and you seek to change that.

Your hand loops into his tie and yanks him down by it, taking him by surprise. He has to catch himself on his hands to avoid falling on you, a grunt escaping his lips as it causes him to slide further into you.

In a lowered hiss, he asks you, “what do you think you’re doing?”

The tone is so vindictive it has any words dying on your tongue. All it takes is a moment before he’s forcefully breathing out and lifting himself off of you, cock withdrawing from between your legs.

You open your mouth to protest, and that’s when your world spins.

You were face up, but now you’re on your hands and knees on the couch, having to brace yourself as he manhandles you silently. There’s not even a moment for you to acclimate to your new position before you feel his fingers loop through your hair as you’d done to his belt, and in one motion, he grabs your hip with his free hand and slams all the way into you, pulling your hair back hard to make you arch for him.

A loud cry splits through the air and it’s only when he starts repeatedly fucking hard and fast into you with the entirety of his monstrous size that you realize the sound was from you.

“See what happens when you push me?” His voice is hoarse and gritty, more like a growl than a whisper, a dull ache inside of you where he’s currently remolding the shape of your walls.

All you can do is make incoherent noises, and you aren’t sure whether they’re from pain, pleasure, or a mixture of both. His grip on your hair isn’t letting up and it hurts, but you’ve also never felt so completely out of control of yourself and somehow it just feels freeing to you.

“Huh?” He asks, and it’s then you realize you never replies to him verbally. You muster up the strength to speak.

“Y-yeah…” it sounds breathy and whiney, completely foreign in the contours of your voice.

“You happy now? Happy you got me to fuck you like the greedy whore you are?”

The harsh word ripples through you hotly and you moan, nodding as good as you can. “Yes…”

“Yes?” He asks, breathless, and he lets go of your hair in favor of wrapping his hand around your neck from behind. “You like being screwed like a whore?”

Apparently, you do. This is new information to you as well. You nod, gasping as he grabs your hand and presses it over your abdomen, where you can feel the flesh rising and falling in tandem with his thrusts.

“Feel that?” He asks, “that’s me inside of you.”

“Oh god,” You rasp, the knowledge of him so deep inside your body going right to your head. You can feel your mound weeping all over yours and his thighs, the wet slap tell-tale of just how much you’re enjoying this. Just the realization has you fluttering around him, a sensation that isn’t lost on him.

“Fuck,” he breathes, “You really do like this, huh?”

You nod. “Yes, yes, Kento…”

He groans, leaning forward and kissing the juncture of your neck and shoulder, brushing your hair out of the way.

“Such a good girl for me…my good little slut.”

You shudder, eyes squeezing shut as he speeds his movements up, the hand that was pressing yours to your stomach moving down to the slippery mess that is your swollen clit.

The big palm of his on your neck slides the thin straps of your dress down your shoulders and dips into the neckline of it, grasping your breast as if to claim ownership of it.

“Oh my god,” You breathe again, hips twitching at all of the stimulation, face hot, entrance thoroughly fucked open and sloppy, debauched by Kento like a destructive form of artwork.

His middle finger massages circles into your sensitive pearl as he continues the grueling pace of his hips, lips pressed to the back of your neck, and all at once it becomes too much.

It crashes into you like the unforgiving wave of the raging ocean, sweeping you into the depths of pleasure.

You cum so hard on his cock he physically has to stop moving, your hold on him so tight he’s locked inside of you. That’s the moment that he follows, spilling his pent up, heavy load into you with a hiss of pleasure.

Your arms and knees feel like jelly. Your walls are sore and throbbing, completely exhausted from his ravaging. But all you feel is feather-light. Finally, finally you did it. And it was better than your wildest imagination.

Lips place a tender kiss on your shoulder, his labored breaths slowing back to regulation. You feel his cheek rest upon the skin of your upper back. Both of his hands massaging along the sides of your hips.

“I’m sorry we waited so long. I just figured it would be too intense for you.”

You shake your head, turning it to look back at him as he straightens up and carefully pulls out.

“Don’t do that again.”

The corner of his lips turns up slightly. “Oh no, I won’t make that mistake twice. In fact…there’s something else I want to do now.”

“And what’s that?”

“I want to test your limits.”

A/N: here's my Nanami masterlist :) this is the first piece but lmk what else you want me to write for him! Hope you enjoyed.

#jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x you #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk imagines #nanami kento x reader #nanami kento #jjk nanami #nanami x reader #nanami smut #jujutsu nanami #kento nanami #nanami fanart #nanami x you #nanami x y/n

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