#you've tended a garden
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boredymcbored · 3 months ago
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Kinda Stuck
about what to type about. Brandon journaled. Kiki does. It helps the mentally afflicted. I'm the mentally afflicted.
Let's flick this thing together baby.
But idk what to say.
I guess, the biggest thing is that I want to do this sports thing but I keep...freezing. And it's something I KNOW I wanna do too so the freezing is just... anxiety. Fear. That's getting to me rn.
Why is it getting to me rn?
I thought about making this move a month ago and planned it out and it was the most joy I had felt in years. There was no anxiety, just excitement. I could SEE what I wanted to do for years right in front of me. Honestly, typing this out makes me feeel much better since I'm getting back in the euphoria of my accomplishments being so close. Fruits of labor being close to being sewn.
But I need to do more and... I'm scared of fucking up.
Will I fuck up? Man maybe. A little but shit happens. Honestly, I'm so good at this, I've done it so long. I've done it hurt, I've done it happy. I think I can handle it. Like typing this out the belief part kicks into overdrive.
But the scared...? That's there too. Even if my inner DOG wants to come out and show the world... man I still have that meek nervous child sitting in the lobby twiddling her thumbs. Scared of the outcomes. Will I outcomes. Will I outcomes?
Truth is... I don't know.
Considering your track, dude, yes you're right there. You lean into this more and this thing will take off. You see it. It's so very obviously... THERE.
But you have messed up before. And that scares you.... A lot.
A lot.
But that's okay.
You've done it scared before remember? Done it when you thought you couldn't. When you shouldn't. And... you find a way. You have. In all ways that you've wanted it... you've found a way. And no matter how crazy it was... Man... it was. And most times, has been pretty good at that!
So allow yourself to get scared Andrea.
It's okay. It happens.
But also allow yourself to live in your fullest amazing reality. Live in the joy you've lived in for years.
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bumblebeessims · 5 months ago
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🔮🌙🍉
Rumour has that deep in the woods of henford-on-bagley there lives a witch. No one knows how long she has been there.. But some say that if you give her an offering then she will tell you your future. Just as many people say that she'll curse you though, so, y'know, take those old henford rumours with a pinch of salt.
my sim for the sims of tumblr community emoji prompt💖
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dogearedheart · 4 months ago
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8i've been thinking about the last asks i got today. and i think it's better for me to take a step back from this account. i know the anon didn't mean anything by it, but i still feel like i am being a negative presence on here and weirding people out with who i am is nothing i want. so, i am not deleting or anything. i am just gonna be less present with sharing personal things or leaving tags. I'll probably be more active on my second account where i don't have that many followers :)
#i guess it affected me more than i'd like to#i don't want to make people uncomfortable#and i am sorry if i did that with any of my posts i know they have been overly emotional and maybe a bit insane#it's true that i am trying to deal with losing and finding peace i am not very good at this due to my intense emotions#and my fear of loneliness and losing people. i am also in a very bad depressive episode. i am aware that this isn't an excuse for any#of my behavior. i never had a support system so dealing with all this on my own and getting no therapist who is willing to see you#it's a downer. guilt is eating me alive and my mental condition is the something that has ruined a lot for me but it has never before done#such a terrible job before. recovering from that and dealing with the aftermath of this is exhausting and has taken a toll on my physical#and mental health i know this post doesn't mean anything to most of all and is at best confusing but i guess it's my poor attempt#of avoiding that people will hate me. i don't want to self-pity more than i already did. but i do that all on my own already.#i know that life is so much more difficult than fiction and you can't expect miracles or believe in faith to fix anything#i know there is no cure to who i am. i can only try to navigate it better in the future. it doesn't mean that i can't regret what i did.#that i can't feel guilty about it. i know that won't change anything but i am also trying to get better and i understand if that's not#visible. i just have to believe that one day it will be enough for people to say 'hey. i know you are fucked up.#and you hurt me and you've been a bitch. but we'll work on it. i believe in you.' otherwise i have to believe that this loneliness#is all there is and that i'm gonna die hollow#i don't want much. i just want some patience and peace#i want to believe that i am worthy of love and that i can get a future. and yes. me talking about wanting a wife and this stupid apple pie#life... maybe it's cliche and stupid but i have been alone for years and i am so tired of fighting. is it so bad that i don't want to do#this alone? and that goes for friends as well. i want to cook for people built things and tend to a garden to take care of animals#and to create instead of destroying for once.#i don't know why i am still writing i guess when the dam breaks... again. i am sorry for ever making people uncomfortable or even hurting#them that was never my intention. i promise#so i really hope. whoever is reading this. i hope you are doing alright. i hope you had/have a good day. tell the people you care about#you love them and enjoy the little things. read that book. eat that chocolate or do whatever brings you joy. the world is so difficult to#navigate but you are doing such a great job by just existing. you are making this world a better place with the light you radiate#the last thing I want to do something I never can forgive myself for is hurting people#not only but especially the ones I care about. but beyond that those I barely know too because I care about you guys too#I just don't want that... I want to leave the world better than I found it but I'm having a hard time doing it due to this stupid fucking#brain of mine.
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ventique18 · 1 month ago
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AU where Yuu is a neighboring dragon princess who Malleus is absolutely charmed by.
🦇: "WHAT? What do you mean you asked her to marry you?!"
🐉: "Well, I could not help but be swept off my feet at the sight of her. What with her sitting in the garden I've taken great care to tend to, reading a book with such a beautiful smile on her face... Before I could help myself, I told her..."
🦇: "Told her what?"
🐉: "That I would be willing to resolve our kind's population crisis with her if only she would agree to have me as her husband."
🦇: "Malleus you've met her twice. What is wrong with you? I bet she slapped you in the face."
🐉: "She did no such thing! In fact she stood in front of me-- quite so elegantly, mind you,"
🦇: "And?"
🐉: "And before I knew it, her face was so close to mine,"
🦇: "That worked?! And then?"
🐉: "Lilia, she smelled like berries and lilies. Her eyes were like a crystalline bloom of--"
🦇: "My goodness, boy, I don't need the details! Get on with it!"
🐉: "I could feel her breath on my skin,"
🦇: "And?! By the seven, what happened next?!"
🐉: "And then she started sniffing me."
🦇: "... Sniffing?"
🐉: "And asked whether I'd been drinking."
🦇: "..."
🐉: "..."
🦇: "HAHAHAHAHHA"
🐉: "Lilia! This is no laughing matter! I do not understand why she did not just answer with a yes or a no! What am I supposed to tell grandmother if she asks me how our courtship is going?"
🦇: "The next time you meet the princess-- ow, my stomach hurts-- just ask her what her favorite book is. Don't you dare tell her again that you want to breed with her!"
🐉: "But how will I know when to announce to the kingdom that we will be marrying, if all we do is talk about our favorite books?"
🦇: "When she tells you she'd be willing to resolve your kind's population crisis with you, of course!"
🐉: "What if she doesn't ever say that in the next ten years or so? That is not exactly a phrase as common as 'the weather is nice today'."
🦇: "This boy, I swear..."
🦇: "When she starts letting you in her room and on her bed, then you'll know she wants you, too."
🐉: "I see..."
🐉: "Then I must ask permission to enter her room posthaste."
🦇: "Yes... Wait. No. Boy, BOY, GET BACK HERE!"
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bi-writes · 3 months ago
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how would simon react if his mail order bride got really really sick?
mail-order bride
the phone is ringing.
he's on leave, so normally he would never even touch the thing. but there are only two ringtones he has to answer to, and this one isn't price.
he picks it up, putting it to his ear. he wipes the sweat off his brow, letting out a sigh as he steps back under the shade. the sun is out today, of course choosing to beat down on him the one day he finally decided to build you better planters for your little garden.
you've taken to it quite nicely. you love being out here, tending to the little roots and the tiny leaves that have started to sprout. he thinks you look so cute when you're out here, on your knees. you always tie a scarf around your hair and wear these sage green gloves, and he thinks you look so fucking adorable when you come back inside with dirt along your brow and a sweet little smile on your face. you always give him an update. the carrots are so stubborn, you huff, and he tries to hide his grin as you bring out your little gardening journal and scribble in it all frustrated. look, simon! the tomatoes! look! look!--and he practically keens when you grab his hand to bring him outside so he can see.
but it's gotten too small. you've outgrown the little boxes of dirt, and simon knows you're itching to do more. the planter is only half done, so he's a little peeved to be interrupted while he's just starting to get it together.
"wot is it, luv, i'm--"
"s-simon?" your voice is a soft whimper, and you're sniffling on the other line. simon stands up straighter, dropping his tools immediately as he wipes his hands on his jeans and starts to go inside.
"oi. wot happened?"
"s-simon, i-i don't feel so good, c-could you come get me?"
simon lets out a low breath, shaking his head.
"fuckin' hell, luv," he mutters, grabbing his keys and wallet by the door. "still at the library?" you had asked him to drop you off in town, wanting to visit a few of the shops along the main road. your eyes had bugged when you saw the quaint little library and pastry shop, and he agreed to come back later after your little excursion.
"y-yeah, i-i..." you cough a little. "i-i got...i got sick. in the bathroom, i-i--"
"'s olright," he quiets you. "'m comin'. gimme a few minutes."
simon finds you in the family restroom of the little library, seated on the floor and hugging the toilet. he curses under his breath when he finds you, tears blurring your vision as you cry. you didn't sound so bad on the phone, but maybe you were just holding it together until you got yourself some help.
"ohhhh, swee'eart," he sighs, pushing the hood of his jacket off as he kneels down to your level. he wipes the sweat off your forehead with a gloved hand, cupping you under your jaw. "you olright?"
"no," you sob, gasping a little between tears. "i feel terrible, s-simon, i--"
"olright," he coos. "'m 'ere now. let's get ya 'ome. get ya into bed, tha' sound good?"
you nod. you look sickly, eyes dull, a cold sweat breaking out all over you. he suspects it might be the flu, considering the body aches you seem to have and the headache you tell him about as he helps you into the car. he gives you some water, stroking your face gently, and when you tell him how cold you are, he shucks his jacket off and drapes it over you before taking you back home.
you're in and out of consciousness over the next few hours. simon had helped you into your pajamas before tucking you into bed. he watched you with a glare to make sure you took the medicine he gave you, and he made you drink at least four glasses of water before he let you drift off to sleep.
when you wake up later in the evening, the cat is purring on her little bed hanging on the windowsill. simon had installed it a few weeks ago, a little perch bed so she could look outside and watch the little bunnies that came by in the morning. it's dark out now, and when you look around, simon has turned your little diffuser on, and it smells like lemons.
"s-simon?" you croak. your throat hurts. you hear a shuffle in the kitchen, and then simon is coming into the room. he doesn't turn the main light on, merely coming close and flicking the low lamp on beside you.
"'ow are ya feelin'?" he asks softly. your eyes are watery again, and he sighs, putting the back of his hand to your forehead and grimacing. "not as warm, at least. what do ya need, hmm?"
"my throat," you whisper. "i-it hurts--"
"i'll bring ya a cuppa, baby," simon murmurs. you sniffle, leaning into his hand. "do ya want somethin' ta eat? anythin'? got some bread...some soup if y'r up for it."
your lip wobbles, and he shakes his head, kissing your forehead gently.
"i'll bring ya some bread. if ya can keep it down, we'll try the soup, yeah?"
you just nod and shrug, and he picks up the box of tissues on the dresser and takes one out. he comes back to you, holding your cheek gently with one hand and wiping your tears with the other. he dabs at the sweat gently before he lets you relax again.
"i'll be right back."
you close your eyes when he leaves. you vaguely hear him in the kitchen, the sound of cookware and the whine of the kettle on the stove. simon comes back into the bedroom a little while later, holding a small plate and a steaming mug of tea. he sets down the tea, telling you it's something lemon with honey, and he shows you the thin slice of bread he's toasted with a little butter.
he sits with you while you eat small bites, and he helps you drink the warm tea that immediately soothes your insides. you start to cry again, but not from feeling so terrible.
"wot's wrong?" simon huffs, and you just look up at him, clinging to his shirt, pulling him onto the bed.
"t-thank you," you whisper, and simon just shakes his head.
"wot for?"
"f-for taking care of me. f-for c-coming to get me...for..."
simon meets your eyes, holding them, and he narrows his eyes.
"don't thank me," he says firmly. "wot fuckin' kind o' man would i be if i didn't take care of my wife, eh? sorry fuckin' wanker, is wot i'd be."
"b-but--"
"and when y'r better," he interrupts you, standing as he takes your plate, "got everythin' set up for ya outside. can move the lettuce, like ya wanted."
you sink into the cushions, happy tears in your eyes, and simon leaves, busying himself with the dishes as he tries to fight off the warm, aching feeling in his chest.
fuck, it feels so good to take care of you. to see you smile. to see your wobbly lip and those tear-filled eyes and know that he can make it all better--it feels so fucking good.
when he comes to bed later that night, you're still asleep, but you move towards him, seeking his warmth. it's instinctual now, easy.
there's a place at his side that's made only for you. it's shaped just how you are, it cannot be mistaken to be for anyone else.
when he whispers that he loves you into the dark, you don't hear him. but you scoot just that much closer.
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eupheme · 3 months ago
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— from eden
old man logan x mutant!f!reader
rated e - 5k
tags: Logan timeline, sorta divergent/fix-it fic, angst, hurt/comfort, everyone is going through it, wound tending, dark thoughts/references to violence/death (aligning with themes in the movie), neurodegenerative disorders (Charles), multiple pov, established relationship, shower sex, oral sex, PiV, feelings
a/n: still on my druid!mutant kick - reader absorbs the sun via photosynthesis and can transfer that energy to grow plants. no features described but small details & a codename are noted in reference to her mutation.
Every day you wish you could do more. More for Charles. More for him. But the harsh sun eats away at you. You weren’t built for this heat.
You were meant for gardens. For Eden.
But you think… as your fingers trail through the earth, your life force flowing down into the greenery below - if something can grow here, in the desert - then maybe, so can hope.
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Logan finds you in the garden.
It's generous to call it that. Carved out with old bits of metal, used like a spade. Scraping through dirt, packed and hard from the burning sun. Dust swirling around you - catching under your nails that are as tough as bark.
The only bit of green for a couple miles, at least. Incongruous to the climate - all you can see is desert around you.
It's only you that keeps it alive.
Your hands pass over each stalk and stem. The low thrum that used to come so easily, siphoning your life force to the roots below, comes slowly now.
Used to be able to make things bloom, just by feeling.
A garden had sprouted your first night together. Blooming lush - vines twining around the bookshelves. Wildflowers in your hair. Moss spreading out across the wooden floor, out and into the mansion.
Everyone had known you were in love.
It feels so long ago now. Another lifetime.
Now you can only tend them. You’re at your strongest in the rain, but it’s day twenty-three of sunny, blue skies. No more than a wisp of a cloud on the horizon.
It leaves you wilting. A half-broken lawn chair, dragged to face the packed-dirt road. Watching for him, as your face tips up to the sky. A slowly-recharging battery, one that hasn't been full in years.
But the sun is unforgiving. The tips of your fingers and toes darken - it's too much.
And not enough.
An eye cracks open, with the slam of a car door. There's a limp to his gait - a hand braced against the limo. Something you notice immediately. The way it takes him longer than usual to reach you.
That severe frown softening at the edges, but still holding a weight he's carried for years. A brown bag held out silently, the top crumpled from his fist.
Your fingers brush his, and you know he can see the burn. The mark between his eyebrows deepens.
"Don't push too hard, blossom," Logan rasps, "'Bout time to go in."
It makes your jaw grit, as you bristle.
You want to protest. Ask him "well, what in the hell do you think you're doing/?" He's the last person that should be lecturing you, as he shifts - a crimson glint of red near his collar.
But you don't. He doesn't mean it that way.
It comes out wrong, you've learned that by now. Misplaced anger - seeping into your roots like poison. Loving him so fiercely that it aches, to see him this way.
The Logan you knew and loved changed that day at the mansion.
"I will." You tamp the feelings down, burying them with the rest, "Let me get these started, and I'll be in."
He lingers, for a long moment.
You rip the seed packets open, scattering them across the earth you've prepared. Essentials, fit to feed Charles.
Carrots, beans, tomatoes, onions. Kale and fresh berries.
A packet of wildflowers.
There's a lump, lodged in your throat. You look over your shoulder, just as he disappears inside.
An inhaled breath, as you begin.
He knows you hate it, all the dust. The heat.
Knows you stay, for him.
Logan always was your sun.
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"He's bleedin' again." It's muttered out, in greeting.
Caliban's eyes flick towards the back door, "Don't know if I've got enough peroxide to get it out."
Your smile is weary, "We'll figure it out. Always do."
A fine pair the two of you make. Only the mornings and evenings spent together, in your slow rotation of work-Charles-eat-sleep, and always just out of sync.
He tends to the smelting plant. An attempt at keeping things in place, keeping things running. Something simmering on the makeshift stove, as you empty your apron into the sink.
Outside is your domain - days spent with wind-whipped skin. The desert heat surrounding you.
"Could use some potatoes," Caliban offers, without thinking.
Peeling back the husk and silk on an ear of corn, fished out. Peering down at the kernels beneath - still hesitating, even though it's clean.
Your arms cross over your chest, head tilting, "Well, you're welcome to ask him."
It all comes out hushed, even though you know Logan is out with Charles. He gives shoots a reproachful look your way - he's already taken an earful. Doesn't need another from you.
He's been with you both for a year now. A second set of hands, as the seizures worses. You hadn’t wanted to admit you needed help - but Logan had saw right through you.
Charles’s space feels like a tomb.
Each minute you spend in that dome makes you crave another five outside. Too much for you to handle alone - something that still eats away at you.
Never felt like you were doing enough.
Carried the others with you, as he did. The shame of feeling like you should've done more. That you should have been there with them.
Buried beneath the rose bush that bloomed, when you had first told Logan you loved him.
You had thought that he had been. Had spent two years adrift, so certain he had been lost. That adamantium had not been enough to suppress the force of the seizures - that it ripped through the metal and took him from you.
It's why you cling now. Worried. Seeing how each day changes him, like it does you.
It's why you grow the vegetables for them. Even then, it's not enough. The suppressants they released still worked its way into the water and soil. You'd already ingested enough food to have it affect you.
Used to eat for fun, for pleasure. Haven't had a bite in two years now. Haven't needed to, haven't wanted to. Looking to the sun instead, even if it burns.
Now, you're just maintaining. Trying not to worsen, trying your best to keep them afloat, even if it costs you.
"Sorry." You mutter.
Easing into the routine of ladling out bowls. Chunks of half-stale bread, from the last time he baked. Hadn't harvested as much wheat this season as you would have liked. Pests chewing up a portion before you noticed.
The drought makes you hazy. Running on fumes for a while now. Same as all the rest.
Two bowls set on a plastic tray. A glass of tepid water in a chipped mason jar tucked in the crook of your arm. Fingers swirling in the liquid to cool them, before you're tilting it back - taking a swallow. Just managing to ease your parched throat.
"How is he?" You ask.
Caliban's eyes are slow to meet yours. He looks at you like he knows something you don't. Few secrets between you, except ones like these that he keeps deep. It always sends a twist in your belly.
Curling vines, weaving between your ribs.
"Logan or Charles, dearest?"
"Both." You sigh, "Either."
“Logan is… well. You saw him.” Caliban mutters. His nose twitches. A breath - as if he means to say something.
He falls silent instead, pivoting, “And Charles still thinks he's in Macbeth."
It makes your heart lurch, how so kind and sound a mind had changed. Not his fault and it only makes you love him more, after everything.
“Been asking about someone named Erik lately, too.”
You and Logan had agreed. It was better that Charles didn’t know, if he didn’t have to. That the two of you would bear it - shielding him like he had shielded so many for years.
But it never made the memories any easier.
His head inclines towards the trays, "You want me to take those out?"
Caliban knows you hate it.
You know the sun is still setting, sitting golden on the horizon.
A shake of your head, as the tray tucks under your arm.
“Thanks, Cal. I've got it."
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The music comes first - 60s-era jazz, floating through the opened door. Voices come after, as you step into the shadows.
“-sorrow words, the grief that does not speak," Charles's reciting pitches louder, as his chair wheels in front of you, "Knits up the o-er wrought heart and bids it break-”
Logan stalks after, reaching for the controls.
"Enough."
"Thrice the brinded cat-"
The tray clatters on the top of an old desk. You step in front of them, arms spread wide, "Charles."
The chair halts, going still.
Something scrapes at your brain, when his hazy eyes meet yours. Fingers sifting through files. A dealer skillful hands, l shuffling through cards - snapping them back into place.
Plucking old memories from you like weeds. Dragging them to the surface, long buried.
He doesn’t mean to.
Doesn’t even know he’s doing it.
Your breath coming in a ragged gasp, eyes meeting Logan's. He doesn't need Charles powers to know what you're thinking.
Afraid that he'll see. What he’ll remember.
"Come on." Logan is hoisting him out of his chair. A grunt as he struggles, near dead-weight in his arms, “Enough poking around.”
Depositing Charles in his hospital bed, the last golden rays of sun streaking across the worn blankets. Logan just starts to move away, when a hand fists in his dark tie, dragging him close.
"You're not listening to me. No one listens to me." The words almost seem lucid, with how sharp his eyes suddenly shine, "Liberty, Logan. They're waiting for you. Eden-“
"No one is waiting for me." It's barked out.
Uneasy, tipping towards harsh.
Logan's patience has always ran thinner than a knife’s blade. It's love that keeps him here, you know that as well as you know your own name.
You have to step between them to break the connection. Hand wrapping around Charles' wrists - soothing, easing them down into his lap - as Logan fishes a bottle out of his pocket.
Slipping a needle into his arm. It's fluid, how you move together. Easier to help him together, then when you're alone.
It soothes the seizures. Thoughts slipping between his fingers, as he settles. The anger with it, as you bring dinner over to them. Your hand extended to take the pills that Logan shakes from a bottle.
"Take these, Professor." You coax, handing over a stained mug from the attached tray.
The chalky pills disappear, with the tilt of his head and a swallow of weak tea. Only then does it feel like you breathe. Letting your fingers drift across the makeshift herb garden he has sitting on the desk, something you tend together.
Eyes closing, as you concentrate. Pink petals blooming, plucked from the stem, and placed in Charles' open palm.
Logan's gaze a heavy weight - too tired from the day - you could already hear it in his voice. In the slow shift of his weight, as he eats.
"Only one?" The wizened fingers close like a cage around the flower, "You’ll have to work harder, Crescere."
The name is one that you haven't heard in years. It ricochets through you like a bullet, threatening to rip you open. You must show it in your face - a hand reaches to smooth down your back.
It soothes you, until an edge creeps into Charles's voice.
"If you cannot do more, how will you ever survive without soil?"
Logan goes stiff at the words. Breaking contact as if he'd been burned. A rough tilt of his head, as he pushes himself up.
“I’ll be inside.” It’s gritted out, through clenched teeth.
Leaving you alone, perched on the edge of Charles’s bed.
His mood already shifting, as it often did. The anger and confusion flaring. Melding with the medication that slows his tongue, dulls his thoughts.
“Crescere,” His eyes fix on you, while you watch the door creak shut. The moonlight has just started to stream in now, and it's just dark enough to imagine a breeze, “Have I told you about Eden?”
You tuck him in. The worn quilt tugged up high against his chest. A fingers smooth down to wrap in his - his hands frail with age, but his grip is still strong.
Tears prick your eyes, but you smile - your hand gently squeezing.
“Tell me again.”
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His fingers fumble with the buttons. The black tie tugged loose, hanging against his chest. A hiss of breath, as sore shoulders roll. The dress shirt caught against his bicep, the sleeves still pushed up around his elbows.
There’s a hand against his shoulder. Your fingers slipping beneath the fabric, easing it down his arms.
“You gonna stop running from me?”
It’s soft, in the room that you share. A far cry from the mansion - all cozy, stained wood. Home.
Here, it’s sheet metal. Car batteries running a broken coffee maker, blankets stained with sweat. An industrial fan, slowly spinning where it’s mounted into the wall.
Wasn’t trying to run.
Just couldn’t shoulder your hurt, knowing he caused it himself. Knows that the heat eats away at you. Has watched how you struggle, though you hide it so well.
And the open seas - the sun and the salt water - would it be enough? Could you ever be happy, away in a place like that?
You’ve told him all you need is him. But pretty thing like you should be somewhere else.
Somewhere safe.
Knew he was too old for you, even back at the mansion - and that was when his hair was just starting to grey at the temples.
Now, he wishes he could convince you to go. Even if he couldn’t live without you.
But he knows your answer. That set of your jaw. Rooting you in place, unmoving.
It flickers in you here, as your arms wrap around him. Nose buried against the nape of his neck, as he exhales a breath that he’s held all day.
His muscles going lax as he leans into your embrace - letting you move him. Touch gentle as you guide him towards the bathroom. Fitting between spread thighs as he leans against the cracked counter, your fingers tracing the red-stained rips on the white tank beneath.
A cloth, wrapped tightly around his fist.
“Running to you,” Logan husks, “Just lost my way.”
You soften before his eyes.
Unwinding the wrappings to check the wound across his palm. Your lips pressed against scar tissue. Moving to backs of his knuckles, between the angry red slits.
Something in his chest lurches. Calming the beast, as his palm cups your cheek. Letting you lead him into the old ceramic tub, even though the space was narrow.
Lets you strip him down, knowing your eyes flicker over each scar. Looking for ones you missed, though you know them all.
Already knows what you’re going to say, when your gaze catches on the still-healing wound - a bullet beneath his collarbone. In his chest, through his bicep.
“Can’t keep taking hits, baby.” You fingers trace just shy of the wounds. Blood flaking, where he hadn’t washed well enough - two days spent in a shitty motel, each one thinking of you.
Need to shield yourself. Pick your battles.
He’s heard it all before.
Tried to earlier - wanted to gut the Alkali-Transigen fucker who had climbed into his limo. He is trying, even if it doesn’t seem like it.
All he got was a business card burning a hole in his pocket. A lie of omission like a lead weight in his belly.
Another tucked against his chest - the bullet nestled in the pocket of his shirt. Resting against his heart while he drives. Hidden, when he returns home.
It’s insurance - but it would still crush you to find it.
“I’ll ease up when you do.” He counters, though his voice softens, “Pushing too hard, sweetheart. We could stand to eat less, if you need a break.”
You sigh, as you lean into him. Face muffled against his chest, and he only just catches the words.
“When I used to imagine playing house with you,” You breathe, “I always thought it would be a little different.”
It makes his heart jolt.
Something tearing inside him, as his mouth presses against yours. A hand searching to turn the handle - the water stale. A weak spray that only reaches room temperature.
But it’s enough.
You wash the red from him. Swirling down the drain as you coat the washcloth with a sliver of soap. Careful in your movements, as your hair dampens.
As his hands catch at your hips, looking for an anchor.
A little huff when you fingers twirl - when he has to let go, to turn around. Soaping up his back, fingers raking through his hair.
The stress of the day sluices from him. Melts away as your lips press against his back, trailing across his shoulders. Nails tracing against his abdomen, as he leans into your touch.
It’s always been softer than he deserved.
And when your hand drifts lower, swirling soap against the dark trail of hair that leads down, he guides your hand the rest of the way.
A throb, at the soft inhale of your breath. Fingers that close around him, coaxing him to full hardness. His own scrape against the tile, as he props himself up.
Eyes half-lidded, as you nuzzle against his scars. Fist working him from root to tip - he can’t resist bucking into your touch.
His own hand wandering. Hesitant.
Afraid he won’t find you the same.
Reaching behind him, feeling the stretch of healing muscle and sinew as he cups the curve of your ass. A held breath loosened, when he hears the needy sound you make, when his fingers slip to trace between.
Teasing, drifting down to where you’re slick. Honeyed.
Always for him. Only for him.
His eyes fully shut now, as his fingers work inside you. Feeling the clench, the way your hand stutters.
Your breathing turning harsh, panting. His name whined out as your hand dips to cup him - the pressure coiling low in his belly. Hips nudging against his as he pets at your clit, smearing your skin with your need.
Turning, when he isn’t able to take it any longer. Always would be strong enough to do this - to hitch your thigh around his hip.
Lifting you enough to rub his flushed cock against your folds. Your nails biting red marks into his shoulders as he lines himself up-
The water cuts off.
The evenings rations depleted.
Your laugh is more of a whine than anything, but it’s still a sound he treasures.
His own lips curving, and it feels like the first time in days.
The words rasps out, coated with need.
“Let me take you to bed, honey.”
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His skin is still damp when he lays you down.
Nestling you against the pillows - ignoring your soft protests of needing to take care of him, as he seeks out the honey between your thigh. Hands tracing up your leg, calf to knee. Up against smooth skin, until he can hitch one over his shoulder.
Letting him bury himself deeper. Tonguing at your clit. Down to dip inside you, a rough groan against your skin as his hips rut into the mattress.
He had you close already. You always unfurled for him, and that hadn’t lessened with his age. Automatic, in the way his fingers fit inside you, finding the spot that has your back arching as you cry out.
Stroking against it again and again, a groan caught in his throat as your fingers twist into his hair and tug.
Logan’s name a soft cry as he tastes you sweeten against his tongue. The tight pulse around his fingers, echoing where his lips shift to suck against your clit.
It’s only when you reach for his wrist does he stop, content to spent the night right here if you’d let him - make up for the time spent away.
Only then does he relent. His arm stretching out behind the pillows as he finally lays back, the tug of a smile as he watches you.
There’s a sweetness about you - all limp-limbed as your thigh lifts across his waist. Straddling him, as you lean - tugging supplies out of the end table.
Squirming, as his head lifts - unable to help mouthing at your breasts. A heady throb down low when he can feel your heart kick up a notch.
Always doing things out of order.
Each shift of your hips rubs your pussy against his cock. Slick and wet and warm, and he catches the curve of your lips.
The slow rhythm, as you pack padding against his wounds. Affixing tape to his skin, a kiss placed against one - as if it would help them heal faster.
His look heated, and he knows you feel it too. The hitch of your hips. The pressure when you grind down - your eyes blown dark when you look at him from beneath your lashes.
He can give you what you need.
A grunt, as a hand grasps at your hips. The loose supplies slipping from his abdomen, as he coaxes you into your knees.
His other hand wrapping around the base of his cock, tilting his hard length up to rest against your belly.
“Need you.” It’s gritted out.
On another day he might have swallowed it down. Let you come to him.
But right now, he can’t take any more teasing, wrapped in your soft touch. He’s already resisting the urge to drive into you, as you angle him against your opening.
The slightest pressure, as you start to give around him - opening up. And when you finally sink down flush against him, he forgets himself.
It’s now and it’s six years ago - all those evenings spent, entwined.
Fitting together, watching the way your brow still pinches as your body makes room to take him - the stretch as your hands curl into fists against his chest.
“Missed you, sweetheart.” It slips from him, when your hips fully meet his.
It only makes you squeeze more tightly around him, his breath caught in a low rumble in his chest.
Your own admission, as you dip down to kiss him, “Missed you more.”
Finding himself transfixed, in spite of the weariness. The ache in his bones that are now a part of him are forgotten in the way you watch him.
Eyes half-lidded, as you find your balance. Starting a slow grind of your hips, a look thrown his way when you feel his muscles string tight beneath you.
The lightest pressure of your palms against his chest, careful of his wounds.
“Want to make you feel good.” It’s a command, tinged with permission. It’s woven with love, and the thought of taking matters into his own hands ebbs.
“Always do, sweetheart,” Logan husks, “Every fucking time.”
Letting himself settle back against the mattress. Losing himself in the tight grip of your pussy. Your soft curves, as his hands wander.
Squeezing the soft flesh of your ass, urging you to ride him harder. Slipping up to tease at your tits, an upward flex of his hips when you cry out his name.
You once told him that you wanted him the first moment you met him. Now, he wishes he had met you sooner.
A year. A day. Even a minute.
The thought pulses in his chest, in time with his heart. Fingers skating over skin as you ride him. A flash of white when he thumbs against your clit, giving you something to grind against.
You’re molten around him. Soft and sweet and it’s all he can do to match the way you bounce on his cock. Feet planting against the bed to help can meet you, urging himself just that little bit deeper.
Melting just a little bit further, when you can’t help but lean down - needing his mouth against yours.
Flattening yourself against his chest, as your rhythm goes needy. Sloppy grinds instead of the sharp slap, taking him deep and keeping him there.
His thumb swirls, and your ragged moan breaks the kiss. Head dipping as you lean back - hips chasing your pleasure, rocking into his familiar touch.
Can smell how much you need it. How you drip around his cock, the coarse hairs matted with your desire.
Teeth clenching, and it only makes him fuck to harder into you, to loosen your tongue.
“Logan, fuck-” It’s whimpered, in that pretty tone that he loves, “Think I’m gonna come-”
The leash he grasps onto slipping between his fingers. A low heat in his belly burning brighter, a pressure ticking down with each slap of his hips.
“Know you’re close. Let go, baby. So fucking good for me-”
Something rasped out, as you flutter around his cock. Taking him deep, spearing him into your belly.
“Fuck, I can feel you coming on my cock.” It comes out ragged, his breath catching, “Gonna make me come, too-”
Your gaze is dark. Hands pressing harder against his chest as you find yourself again, riding him harder. Panting through it, as it tips towards too much - your orgasm still burning brightly.
He's surrounded by you, and he only wants more. Fingers pinching into your hips, driving himself into you.
“Wanna make you come,” You breathe, “Want to feel you tomorrow-”
It’s enough that he forgets himself. A hands tight against your hip, a sharp tug that pulls you flush. The other curls around the back of your neck as he flips you beneath him.
Your gasping laugh pairs with his snarl. An arm hooking under your knee - pushing, opening you up as he holds you in place.
Watching how your eyes glaze. Following the tug of your fingers, bringing his mouth down to yours. Your pulse thundering beneath his thumb, as his tongue licks into your mouth.
He tastes like you, as his eyes slip shut. You linger on his lips, smeared across his beard. A ragged moan as your hips lift to meet the sharp smack-smack-smack of his hips, and then his vision is going hazy.
Your name snarled out, twining with soft sentiments. Hilting himself just as the pressure reaches its peak, his cock throbbing as he spills with a growl inside you.
The tension easing with each flex of his hips, fucking himself empty into your warmth. Into your embrace, your arms wrapping around and keeping him close. The scruff of his beard scrapes your cheek, but you only hitch a thigh around his hips - nudging him deeper.
Logan would stay here forever, buried in you, if he could. It slips from him, then - rasped low into your ear.
“Fuck, I love you.”
He should tell you more often. Would tell you every day, if not for the guilt that twists in his guts each time you say it back.
But tonight, he can only lean into it. The soft whisper, as your lips drag against his cheek. You say it just like you used to. It still comes just as easily.
“I love you too, Logan.”
And when his breathing settles and his eyes open - his chest catches.
You're adorned with your devotion - hair dotted with alyssum. Forget-me-nots and primrose dappled across your shoulders, yarrow and heather blooming around your curves.
Had learned the names of them, long ago. They come back, as his fingers trace over each bloom.
You’re beautiful.
But you always have been.
Prettiest goddamn thing he’s ever seen.
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He bites harder, when he’s wounded.
No more than a cornered animal. But the anger - it takes a hold on him. Leaving him to soften, when there’s a hand he knows.
Making words slip from him that he’d tuck inside, on a different day.
“I do it for you, blossom.” It comes out quiet, in the darkened room, “You know that right?”
You shift against his shoulder. Head cradled against his chest, ear pressed to his heart.
“We do it for Charles,” You breathe, half-asleep. Fingers splaying across his sternum, tracing against the dark whorls of hair.
His own brush over petals. Used to help pluck them from you, after stolen moments during missions. Would love the way your face screwed up - a soft veil of embarrassment washing over you. His own lips pulled in a smug smile, as he had tucked one behind you ear.
Logan huffs, the sound low. Almost a laugh.
“I keep going for you.”
His heart would keep beating for a long time, but he thinks it would stop if yours did.
You press yourself tighter against him. It’s mumbled against his skin, “Keep going for you, too.”
There’s salt against his skin, tears you can’t afford to shed. Silent, as the stars creep higher in the sky above you.
Should be out driving, right now. Can’t bring himself to leave.
So he holds you, until your breathing slows. Until the tension eases once again, sleep taking you.
You never were afraid of him. Only for him.
Never hesitated to crawl into bed beside him, even with his nightmares. Can still remember your insisting.
Clip the stem of the flower, and the bloom will fade. Skewer it though, and it will grow around it - oozing golden ichor until it heals.
It's supposed to be a comfort.
But Logan doesn’t know how to tell you that he’s afraid that he plucked you from the earth, long ago.
You just haven’t realized it yet.
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Logan finds you in the garden.
Charles is out with you today. Tucked beneath the afternoon shadows of the smelting plant. He would laugh - does laugh - at your excuse of a garden. It pales in comparison to the mansion. The old ivy that crawled up the walls, across the sprawling grounds.
You laugh with him, because - what else is there to be done?
The sound dies, as the limo comes back early. A hand shades your eyes, as he steps out.
Still weary, though not as much as yesterday. Worry set in the lines around his eyes the grit of his jaw.
The reason revealed, when he steps to the side. A girl, stumbling out of the back seat of the limo.
Her eyes are feral, and there’s something so familiar about her that it steals your breath.
“Crescere.” Charles breathes - more lucid than you’ve seen him in days, “That is Laura. She’s the mutant I told you about. The one we have to help get to Eden.”
And for a moment, he’s the Charles he was a decade ago. The one you would have followed to the end.
Something blooms in your chest, at the sight of the girl.
The mutant, when there hasn’t been a new one in so long. A tight knot unfurling inside you, and it feels like a new beginning.
It feels like hope.
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and then they all left to find Eden together and nothing bad ever happened again! 😌💖 I'm heading back to Trouble Will Find Me and Come On And Show Me after this, just was struck with this idea and wanted to explore it! thanks so much for reading!!
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derinthescarletpescatarian · 7 months ago
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Game that's a dating sim/time management style game, but you don't date anyone (or at least if you do, dating isn't the point). The premise is that you've gotten a new entry level job in your dream career in a town that's WAY too expensive for you to live in with zero available rentals, but due to a stroke of amazing luck and a distant family connection, you're able to score a rental in a nice community for a price you can just about handle. The catch is that you have to join the homeowner's association. Your landlord is distant, but expects you to keep in line with the HOA or get evicted.
The game consists of carefully managing your out-of-work time to keep up with the HOA's increasingly stringent list of rules about the appearance and maintenance of your property. If you don't spend enough time on yardwork and maintenance, you'll start to get violation warnings, but you also need to go to community events to avoid getting on the other members' shitlists and making enemies who'll look more critically at your property. You can buy leeway if you spend time schmoozing the other HOA people, helping them with crises, and siding with the more powerful figures in disputes. Your dream career is a background event in your life, focused more on keeping a roof over your head, but if you skip work to tend to HOA stuff you risk getting fired, and conversely if you put in extra hours and do really well you can get bonuses which you can use to pay a professional gardener or housekeeper and free up some more time. The power dynamic in the HOA can change, so be careful putting all your eggs in one basket relationship-wise lest your friends be on the outs and your enemies start looking for ways to get rid of you. But if you change your alleigances too often, you'll get a reputation as a fair weather friend, which can be equally dangerous. Getting too close to someone who ends up in a scandal could tarr you with an equally scandalous reputation, but you won't know what scandals are going on in the neighbourhood . Getting evicted or fired are both, of course, loss conditions, but showing up for work and [honing it in isn't too hard; you've always wanted to work at... uh... whatever it is that you're doing again. Never mind that. The most important thing in your life is making sure that the grass in the front lawn doesn't grow more than half an inch above the prescribed length.
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that-one-p00k1e · 5 months ago
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───〃★ didn't see that coming? ೃ⁀➷˚ ♡ ⋆。
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✧ summary: kissing them unexpectedly ft. Haruka Sakura, Hajime Umemiya, Hayato Suo, Ren Kaji, Mitsuki Kiryu, Akihiko Nirei, Chika Takiishi, & Jo Togame
✧ content: fluff, gn!reader, OOC (especially w/Chika's since I haven't read the whole manga yet), lots of pure kisses, established!relationship
✦ a/n: no more screen time of my beloveds till next year 😢
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— HARUKA SAKURA | You were at his house, feeding him food and medicine to tend to his fever. He kept insisting that he was fine and was able to take care of himself, but you wouldn't budge no matter how much he argued back. Due to his sickened condition, his energy to complain was quickly drained out. In the end, he let you do your thing and even tuck him to bed. You watched him close his eyes, cool cloth placed on his forehead as his brows let loose and his breathing calming down. The sight made you feel slightly more at ease. Before deciding to leave, you placed a quick peck on his forehead and whispered, “Get well soon, sweetheart.” His fever rose higher the next day.
— HAYATO SUO | He was always the one to initiate something unexpected, which made you determined to get back at him for once. You walked home with him holding an umbrella under the rain, and you saw how he was focused on the road. Seeing the clear opportunity, you went on your tippy toes and squeezed your eyes shut, kissing his cheek before looking away flustered. His eyes went wide for a moment, before smiling and retorting, “My, my. I see you've gotten quite bold, my dear.” Although he was smooth with it, he internally admitted your attempt in catching him off guard was successful.
— REN KAJI | A pout has been tugging his lips all morning. Ever since you came along with him on patrol, you felt the grumpy aura he emitted despite him acting all nonchalant with it. Little did you know that he was sulking. When he came to pick you up this morning, he reached out a hand to hold yours when you turned back to retrieve something; when he considered to lend you his headphones, you bumped into Sakura and the gang; when he reattempted to hold your hand, Lisa came jumping into your arms. He was fuming. Thankfully, at the end of the day, you realized. “Ren?” He looked at you silently, waiting for you to continue as he rolled the sucker in his mouth. “Can you take the candy out real quick, please?” He was confused, but complied either way. With that, you leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss on his lips, before pulling back with a fond smile. He was confused yet again, but this time, he wrapped his arms around your waist and nuzzled into the crook of your neck, relishing in the feeling of finally being able to hold you.
— HAJIME UMEMIYA | Today was a gardening date, where you'd help him out with his garden at the rooftop. Like usual, he proudly exclaims how the plants have grown fast and healthy. It was like seeing a proud father boasting about his children. His smile when he held up two pots of tomatoes was brighter than the sun that was shining upon the both of you, and it was endearing to the point where you couldn't help it anymore. You quickly cupped his face and pressed your lips against his before pulling back and saying, “My sweet, gardener boyfriend.” He immediately placed down the pots, almost dropping them before swooping you up in his arms and twirling you in the air.
— JO TOGAME | You looked up at the sky, hearing cracks of fire as it bloomed into colorful sparks. After strolling through stalls and winning prizes, the festival's main occasion finally made its arrival. Turning to your boyfriend next to you, you tugged at his sleeve and called out to him quietly, “Jo…” gesturing that you had something to say. Just as he leaned down to listen, you gently pulled his face and connected your lips to his. He didn't see that coming, but he wasn't going to complain as he wasted no time and melted into the kiss– pulling you closer by the waist and savoring this sweet moment under the flashing fireworks that lit up the sky above.
— MITSUKI KIRYU | Nothing wrong with taking a break from your small screen gadgets and entertain yourself with something slightly more traditional. Other than the games on his phone, Kiryu was surprisingly good at the ones at the arcade as well. From basketball toss to Pac-Man, you both competed on who could earn the most tickets. Of course, he was taking the lead. He was currently focused on the spinning light, calculating the right moment to press the button and hit the jackpot. When suddenly you leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, causing him to lose focus and accidentally push down the button, missing the awaited jackpot. “Hey, that was cheating.” He still won in the end, but gave his tickets to you anyway.
— CHIKA TAKIISHI | He always looked so aloof– like there were no literal fucks he'd seriously give, and everything others say were just a broken TV's buzzing. Oddly enough, you found that trait to be adorable. Sometimes, you find yourself gazing and staring at his majestic self as he looks off into somewhere or nowhere, holding the familiar empty gaze you've grown used to. He was like an innocent, introverted child during a family gathering– the ones who choose to space off and act cold to those who tried to approach or tease him. The sight was so irresistibly cute, you couldn't help yourself but to squeeze his cheeks between your palms and press a quick kiss on his cheek. “You're so CUTE!” He remained unfazed and gave no reaction, but slithered an arm around your waist and pulled you closer.
— AKIHIKO NIREI | Seeing and hearing him yap about the things he took interest in has always been a trait of his that you found endearing. And right now, you couldn't help but marvel at the way he was so passionate about something to the point of writing it down in his notebook. You listened to it all– nodding and throwing in responses here and there to keep the conversation going. In the middle of his babbling, you leaned forward and gave a quick peck on his forehead. “And then what happened?” you asked innocently afterwards like it was nothing. Meanwhile he was left a stuttering, blushing, and questioning mess of a nerd.
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iamyourdailydoseofbi · 5 months ago
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LIKE REAL PEOPLE DO. ( HOTD x READER )
AUTHOR NOTE! Thanks for all the love. <3 pairing: King Aegon ii Targaryen x Niece! Targ! ( Strong ) Reader suggest song to listen to whilst reading: Like Real People Do by Hozier or Never Love an Anchor by The Crane Wives prompt : I wanted to ask Aegon x niece!reader who is married to him and has been for a long time (say since the Driftmark incident), and has been taking care of him for a long time: helping him through hangovers, patching him up when he gets into fistfights etc. And no matter how much he tries to drive her away by cheating, by yelling and throwing things and generally being disgusting she never gives up on him. I need the ANGST. can you do that please? and Hi🥰 Can I request an Aegon II x Targ!(Strong) reader. She is Rhaenyra’s first child, and she inherited the Targ looks, so she is accepted by the greens. She has always been close friends with Aegon, so it was logical for them to marry. Aegon is still kind of an ass, but he loves her, she can always calm him down. Feel free to change bits here and there, it’s just an idea. Thank you so much in advance, and much love to you!😊 word count: 1, 000+ words
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When your betrothal was first announced, you were barely ten and one and Aegon, was ten and two. It was supposed to be a match made in good will. You were a year younger than Aegon, a happy girl who would make a good Mother one day. But, Aegon detested it. No, he loathed it! He made it clear as day, having no shame if hurt your feelings or caused problems. But, it never bothered you.
In many ways you were like Helaena. You were gentle, soft spoken and viewed the world with a special glimmer. There was this good in you. A good that everybody noticed and adored in the tense walls of the Red Keep. He noticed many things about you, not as if he was paying attention to you. Why would he? You were just a pest. His annoying, pest of a wife. 
You liked to read under the weirwood tree in the garden’s. You liked lemon cakes, not the actual tart, but the sugary lemon slice on top. Your eyes and nose could crinkle up when you smiled. You refused to wear a corset or keep up with the fashion trends in Court, preferring your own distinct style of gowns and hair styles. 
Your jaw would clench whenever you tended to his bleeding fingers, something he inherited from his Mother. You would chew on your bottom lip to stop yourself from flinching whenever he yelled at you. Your eyes would look for him in a room, like you wanted the assurance of his presence there. You were always patient with him, even though he never deserved it. 
You made him feel things, good things. He had gotten used to being ignored or only receiving negative attention. But, it was almost like a dirty little secret of his. To savor the good moments with you. To clutch it close to his chest when he was all alone in his bedchambers. You were good and you were always good to him.  He wanted to break that, and he would.
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Watching as you softly wrap his hand with the bandage, he doesn’t speak up, not daring to ruin this one moment of peace. He could ruin it. He would ruin it, just not right now. This was a nice moment of calm. Just this once would he allow it. Feeling bile go up his throat, he swallows it back down, his face curling up in disdain. His head was still pounding. His gut bubbling up from the large amount of food and strongwine he gorged on. He felt sick, disgustingly sick. 
"You must be careful. Twas' a cut on the finger that took Viserys." You warn, "I do not wish for you to endure such a painful fate as well."
"Do not speak." He murmurs, almost pleading.
"Aegon, I worry for you. Truly, I do not wish to awake one day to hear you've died." You whisper, "Please, Aegon. Be careful. If not for my sake, then for your own."
"Stop with the nagging." He scoffs, rolling his eyes.
"I am not nagging, I know I am not the wife you wished or wanted. But, please, Aegon.."
Feeling his annoyance bubble as you say his name, your voice soft and making it sound so lovely. He detested his name. He detested the legacy that was being forced upon him for being named after his ancestor. But, the way you said it. You made it sound like such a beautiful thing. Like he was not the discarded son, the hated one, the sinful one. Pulling his hand away from you, he abruptly stands up from his hair, pacing on the other end of the table from you. 
He couldn’t bear you caring for him. He was horrid. He was rotten. Everyone in Court thought of it, why could you not do the same? Why could you not stare at him with the same disdain as everyone else? Why? Why? Why the fuck did Rhaenyra raise you so well? Running his fingers through his greasy hair, he thought of the cruelest of things to say to you, wanting to keep you far far away from him. To make you hate him. To make you see him in the same light as others do.
"Why can you not be like other whores? Why can you not spread your legs and not your lips?" He sneers, his voice cruel. 
"Is that I am to you? A whore." You ask, swallowing the lump in your throat. 
"Yes, your a thing for me to fuck. Something for me to use when I need my cock wet. So stop speaking and do your duty.” He continues, “Be nothing more than a thing for me to fuck when needed be.”
“Aegon..”
“No, no, you are nothing. You may look like a Targaryen, but you will always be the blood of a whore. Tis’ why it is no surprise you follow in the same path your Mother does.” He adds, watching your reaction carefully.
Seeing the tears bubbling up in your eyes, he for a split second wishes to take it all back, to beg for forgiveness. But, the voice in the back of his head stops him. You were Rhaenyra’s daughter, a good and kind person. She raised you right. She raised you perfectly. You were supposed to be his enemy. You were supposed to stare at him with the same hatred your Mother stared at his Mother with. Yet, despite it all, you were kind to him. It was fair. It wasn’t fucking fair.
Clenching his jaw tightly, he shakes his head firmly, burying the guilt that festered within him. Soon enough you would understand. Soon enough the good, the kindness, all of it would die within you. You would detest him. You would grow to hate him just as everyone else did. Then, only then, would it make all of the cruelty he had thrown at you be excused. He would then have a good enough excuse for it. The guilt he felt would die. 
“Why do you say such cruel things to me?” You murmur, your voice cracking at the end.
“Because I can. Tears do not move me, so do not expect pity from me.” He confesses, “I never wished for you. I never wished for any of this. Yet, you pester me with your kindness.”
“What must I do for you to not hate me? Tell me, tell me, what you wish for me to be and I will be it.” You murmur, eyes full of so much kindness.
“Stop talking.”
“Tell me, Aegon. Please, please, tell me what you wish for me to say and do. Tell me what girl you wish for me to be, and I can be that girl for you.” You plead, bargaining with him. 
“Stop talking.” He repeats, his voice a little louder. 
"Aegon, please, stop shutting me out. Just speak to me."
You stare up at him, big teary doe-eyes. The same look you gave him whenever unsure, seeking out guidance and reassurance. The same haunting eyes you gave at your wedding, so young and unsure of what to say or do next. Feeling everything bubbling up as you plead and beg him, attempting to please him despite it all.
Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Were you so damn good?! Why can’t you just hate him?! Why could he not just break you?! He broke everything else around him. From toys to furniture to others around him. He could break it all, yet you refused to break or bend.
"He is your brother, your kin. You should not treat him in such a manner."
"Aegon, you twat! You break everything!"
"Tis' the third glass you've broken this week, your grace. Do be careful."
"You are a Prince, a man of a high status, a man grown. Act like it, stop conducting yourself in such a dishonorable manner."
"Have you no shame? Do you not see the dishonor you bring to your wife? To our family name?"
Tears bubbling in his eyes, his bottom lip trembling softly, a lump in his throat thickening up. Shaking his head, he covers his ears with his hands, attempting to block out your soft pleas and attempt to mend things with him. You were so good. Alicent always said she wished to lock you away, to protect you from his rotten touch.
He wished that he was not so rotten. He wished that he could just hold you and melt into your warmth. He wished that he could love you the way that you clearly loved and cared for him. He wished that he could not have such cruel thoughts lingering in his mind. That you both could be like Rhaenyra and Daemon were, so happy and full of love. 
“STOP FUCKING TALKING!” He snaps, tears streaming down his face.
Thankfully, you stay quiet.
“Why can’t you hate me as all the others do? Why must you be so good? So kind? After all I have done to you, you continue to love me." He pleas, "Just hate me. Hate me, scorn me, hit me, damn me to the seven hells! Be like the others. Please..”
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love you babe's for requesting this! i really loved this and had so much fun. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
@decadentfantasy
@the-riley-show
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fawnindawn · 7 months ago
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the line between thieves and healers (Luke Castellan x apollo fem! reader)
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Summary: Luke Castellan returns from his quest as a ghost of his old self with a bleeding scar to prove it. With his golden boy exterior all but shattered, no one in camp has tried to approach him since his return. This changes when you stumble upon the son of Hermes when he decides to go back to his old roots, stealing from your infirmary at midnight.
pairing: luke castellan x apollo fem! reader
Content: forced proximity, tending to wounds, luke develops a little crush, set after Luke's failed quest in the Garden of Hesperides, mentions of injuries and scars, Luke tries and fails at being mean, hurt-comfort, fluff
masterlist for this series (everything in between) every part in this series can be read as a stand alone!
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"Come on." One of the campers prodded despite your obvious discomfort. "I'm sure you've squeezed something out of Castellan by now. He's been silent about what happened during his quest for days."
"I told you, I know nothing, and even if I did- patient confidentiality exists." You repeated for the ninth time in a week. Ever since people found out Luke had come personally to you to tend to his wounds, they had lost all decency over the hope of digging for some good gossip. If you were asked one more time, you were sure you would tell them to stick their noses right back up their asses and leave.
Even after his return, Luke Castellan remained a constant in word of mouth around camp over his sudden change in persona. His usual grin and charm was replaced with a dark gloom unfitting for the son of Hermes, who used to light up any room he entered. The scar that permanently rests on his face didn't make it easier for him to avoid watching eyes either. After refusing to play in Capture the Flag for the first time in history, whatever patience the camp was trying to uphold dissipated into chaos.
Sure, you could see why it was a big deal. If you're a person with a sane enough mind (of course, not guaranteed in the premises of Camp Half-Blood), you’d understand why the fellow camp counsellor of the Hermes Cabin was popular. With his constant presence around camp as the cool, attractive camp counsellor helping other campers with that small quirk up his lips, or through word of mouth of how talented and kind he was, it wasn't a huge surprise that he attracted as much attention as he did.
Once the ninth camper in a row finally gave up and left with a huff, your eyes lingered over the bed where you first tended to Luke.
_
It was the dead of night when you were woken by the sound of creaking wooden floorboards and the cold chill of the wind that had snuck into the infirmary. Somehow, you had overslept again on your shift and no one had bothered to wake you up or even check for your missing presence.
Groaning at the awkward shift of your bones from your horrible sleeping posture on the desk, you were halfway through your stretch to crack your stiff neck when you heard the sound of footsteps. Freezing in place, you paused to listen in once more only to heard the soft thud once again. Peering to the left side of the infirmary, your heart stopped.
"Hey, listen." You spoke with that awkward crack in your voice whenever you go too long without speaking, causing the large shadow to flinch, pausing in its pursuit through your medicine cabinet. "I may not seem like it, but I am the best in combat in my cabin so whoever you are, step away from the cabinet and put your hands up."
Gee, that's convincing, you sound like an unnamed extra from the first few minutes of a horror movie before they end up six feet under. Cursing yourself internally, you watched the shadow raise to full height from its bent position. Gulping at the height that seemed to be at least six feet, you wonder if you should have just left this cabinet thief be and go to sleep for the night.
Why would anyone even want to ransack an infirmary at midnight?
You quickly grabbed for your oil lamp situated beside you, still flickering with the smallest of flames and you stood from your chair, causing it to creak back and scratch at the wooden floors as you made your way around the table to approach the thief.
The light was dim, but you spotted the familiar outline of a broad back and curls before he even fully turned.
"Castellan?" You gasped in half-asleep shock, disbelief obvious in your tone as you moved the oil lamp nearer to prove your eyesight wasn't playing tricks on you.
He didn't respond verbally to the call of his name, but when he turned around, his eyes narrowed on you as if you were the intruder. You barely had the chance to form words, questions- before you spotted the dripping crimson liquid near his eye.
"Oh gods." You muttered, grabbing at his arm and tugging him towards the nearest bed. "Why didn't you wake me up? It's not like you could wrap this up yourself."
With some struggle, he finally gave in, plopping down the edge of the bed and watched you scour through the medicine cabinet for bandages and other supplies, muted and stiff.
"I seriously don't understand why you didn't wake me up. Would you rather bleed to death or get an infection?" You scolded, your inner concern bleeding through your usual sense of politeness for injured visitors.
"Maybe." You thought you heard him mumble, but when you turned to look at him, he was facing the window right beside the bed and staring out into the shadows of the forest, the glow of the moonlight illuminating his features like a haunted painting, blood dripping down his cheekbones like fallen tears. You waited longer for an elaboration but there was none. You assumed you heard wrong, or at least you hoped you did.
You got off your knees, splaying out the supplies on the surface of the bed beside him, and pulled up a stool for you to sit at. He was still facing away from you, and your irritation combined with your lack of sleep made you more reckless than you'd usually be with an injured patient.
You gripped at his chin, forcing him to look at you, watching with satisfaction as his eyes widened at the sudden force. He looked more alive when he was caught off guard, his face devoid of the usual disinterest and distance it had ever since he arrived back from his quest.
"How do you expect me to treat you if you keep looking away from me, Castellan?" You challenged, gazing back into his eyes with fire you hoped was fierce enough to break down the coldness in his gaze.
After seconds of nothing but two stubbornheads trying to win a useless battle of eye contact, he sighed. "..Fine."
You were more gentle after that, letting go of his chin and reaching for the cloth. Your hands remained delicate on his skin that seemed to have pulled at the edge of the scar, where it was now bleeding again through its previous stitches. You mumbled a warning before dapping a wet handkerchief on top of the wound to soak in the blood, and he unintentionally grabbed at your thigh as he tried not to hiss out in pain.
You froze at the sudden tight grip, moving the cloth away from his skin and he was quick to retract his hand, positioning it awkwardly on top of the bedsheets instead.
"It's okay if you grab me." You reassured. "It'd be easier for me to gauge if you need me to stop when it gets too painful. You could give me a squeeze if you need a breather?"
You waited, watching his thoughts flicker through his narrowed eyes before slowly, his hand went to rest around your thigh again.
Ignoring the warmth of his palm on your skin, you cleared your throat. "Ready?"
He nodded stiffly, and you went back to work. After the cut had stopped bleeding, you were quick to grab the gauze and bandages. Tenderly, you placed the gauze above his wound, then wrapped the bandages around his face, from the top of his head to below his chin. This was the closest you had ever been to him, and you could feel and hear both his and your breathing in the quiet silence of the infirmary, with no living signs of life aside from the two of you on the infirmary bed and the dim orange hue of the oil lamp.
You could feel his intense gaze on you from his one good eye, while you concentrated on tying a secure knot so it wouldn't fall loose. The moment felt oddly intimate, knowing how sensitive his temper had been ever since he arrived back at camp, scarred in ways not even ambrosia could heal fully.
His hand resting around your thigh felt hot, and you tried to ignore how your mind subconsciously kept track of every time his thumb would brush over the material of your pants.
"Next time.." You hinted, hopefully not crossing his boundaries. "If this happens again, you come straight here, got it? I don't care if I'm sleeping or attending someone else. You are not allowed to take care of a wound like this yourself, especially since I remember how reckless you can be."
Luke Castellan may be an excellent swordsman, but his cockiness was one weakness that he failed to keep controlled, and on days where it won over, he would always end up at the infirmary with a bashful smile as he tried to explain to you on how he ended up with a dislocated shoulder. That felt like eons ago, when that cheeky smile would always be present on his face, his signature move in getting away with any chaos he caused.
Staring at him now, you caught sight of that smile for such a split second you could've sworn you mistook it.
You couldn't stop the teasing smile that slipped past your stern attitude. "Was that a smile I saw, Castellan?"
He cleared his throat, his face falling back into practiced nonchalance, wearing a frown too forced to be real. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"I may be sleep-deprived because a certain someone decided midnight was the best time to ransack an infirmary, but I'm not blind. For making me work overtime, I at least deserve to know what you found so amusing."
He made a face, and you were sure if his face wasn't tightly bandaged, he would roll his eyes in exasperation. "I wasn't amused. Just don't remember you being this.. unhospitable with someone that's injured. And I am not reckless."
You scoffed, causing him to look over at you. "I'd say trying to steal from an infirmary is pretty reckless. I thought Hermes kids were supposed to be good in stealing?"
You realised all too late that you may have touched on a sensitive topic, with the mention of his father, but he didn't seem to notice over the frank insult of being called a bad thief.
"I am excellent in stealing." He bit back so quickly, you choked on a snort. Hermes kids and their egos. "I was just going easy on you because you were knocked out at your desk. Oh, and you snore, you know that?"
"I do not."
"Do too."
"You're a liar and a thief. Don't get why your reputation is as marvelled upon as it is, Castellan. You don't live up to the hype at all."
"Oh, and what about you, Miss Sunshine?" He retorted. "Aren't you suppose to be the famous sweetheart who sings all injuries away with a smile on your face?"
"Don't call me that ever again." You must have looked extremely repulsed because he let out a laugh so genuine, it wiped any disgust off your face at the sound of pure heaven flooding into your ears. God, you forgot he could laugh like that.
"Yeah, I suppose it doesn't suit you, does it?" He murmured. "Maybe Apollo kids are only nice when others are around to see it."
"You've only come back meaner, Castellan." You scoffed. "I almost regret helping you. Would much rather see you stumble over trying to deal with this yourself if I knew you'd be so ungrateful."
"Sounds righteous of you." He nodded with a sarcastic hum. "Leaving me to bleed out to death while you watch. I understand why the camp has such high stakes when it comes to survival now. Never knew there was a sadist hiding in you, sunshine."
"I told you not to call me that." You reminded. "And I'm doing the best I can to keep everyone here alive so don't come to my infirmary talking about stakes when I've just saved your ass from blood loss."
Your response triggered something in him and he grew silent, his gaze locked on you as if analyzing you. That was when you're really reminded of how awful you must've looked. With your bed hair, sunken-in dark circles and sunken shoulders from the lack of sleep, you did not exactly feel the most confident. You didn't know what happened to make the casual atmosphere disappear as fast as it did, but you were anxious that somehow, you had shut him up again and you'd never get the chance to see him that way again, with his playful banter and light-heartedness of a teenage boy that he should have.
"You shouldn't have to." He muttered, almost to himself rather than to you. A seriousness unlike the previous few quips he'd thrown at you took ahold of him, and you had a feeling this was a slither of who he had really become through his rapid transformation, hidden under the jokes and sarcasm.
"What?"
"You shouldn't have to." He repeated a little louder, trying to get you to see his point. A point he'd been trying to tell Chiron, his friends even- ever since he came back here, only to be meet with pitying looks like he was a madman who spoke nonsense to try and make sense of his failure. "Lives should not be your responsibility. You're younger than me, and yet, you're dealing with kids that are near death's door every time they make it past that barrier. I barely made it back here. Some don't even.."
Luke tried to breathe, remembering how he got to camp in the first place. The unnecessary sacrifice that had to be made, the tree that now rests at the barrier of camp, the sound of thunder and pouring rain beating at his face.
"Now, I'm stuck with this disgusting scar on my face for the rest of my life, a stupid reminder every single time I look at myself, that I failed my only chance at proving I was something more than just wasted potential. Now I've gone and screwed it up for everyone because I couldn't do some easy quest someone else already accomplished-" He winced suddenly, grabbing onto the bandaged part of his face that seemed to grow more irritated and inflamed as he spoke.
You were quick to reach for his hand, knowing his aggression may harm the wound more. "It is not disgusting." You answered for him, and slowly, your hand rested over his, removing it from his face so he wouldn't accidentally cause the wound to start bleeding again. "You are not a failure, Luke."
"Don't take pity on me by saying words you don't mean." He muttered. "Everyone expected me to succeed, I could feel it in their gaze when they looked at me. I was supposed to be the best, and just because everyone told me that, I believed it. Now, I'm nothing but a disappointment to everyone."
He didn't know why he was saying all this to you. Maybe because you were the only person to treat him normally in the past two weeks, to really listen instead of trying to get him to move on, and maybe because his heart felt like it was growing too heavy to carry on his own. The insecurity and vulnerability made him feel sick, and he found himself trying to tear his hands away from you out of the need to run, which only made him feel more disgusted with himself. Like a coward, his mind taunted.
You remained stubborn, holding onto his cold palms because you know he has had no warmth, no real genuine words spoken to him since he returned. No one to see him when it was clear he was suffering, that he needed all the time in the world and more to heal, and that he deserved more than self-loathing and an absent father who sentenced him to this fate.
"I am not pitying you." You insisted, and you leaned closer so he couldn't look away from you. "Your scar does not make you ugly or less valuable to anyone. It is not pity, it is a fact. You are a person who has survived a fate so close to death, and any feat to survive death is strength. You are strong, and you made it back here alive with a scar to prove it. It is not a sign of weakness."
"Anyone who tells you different has no right or say in your situation because they did not go through what you did." You said with a stern voice, your anger not towards him, but for him. "Not your father, not anyone."
Luke finally looked at you, like looked. His eyes were scanning all over your face as if not quite believing you were real, but the fire in your eyes was so magnetic, he couldn't look away. The pinch between your brows, the addictive warmth of your hands in his, and the close distance between the two of you, and yet, it didn't make his skin itch with the need to pull away. To hide in his corner and wallow over the heavy weight of knowing his world had ended in the Garden of the Hesperides. Or had it?
Your eyes looked right through him, and for once, he felt like there was someone there for him.
"I suppose I can see where your reputation comes from now, sunshine." He responded weakly, and his heart gave a thump when you smiled back at him.
"Healing's what I understand best." You shrugged casually, as if you didn't just silence his thoughts for a moment of peace, or that you have somehow dulled the internal blades that bled with self-hatred and world-consuming anger pointed at himself, and at the injustice of the gods who could not give a damn about their children. “If I can help you even a little, why shouldn’t I?”
He could feel time ticking again in the back of his mind, the night slowly passing into a new one, and he thinks as he holds your gaze, that maybe this world wouldn't be so painful to live in if he had someone to look at him the way you did.
"I don't know how I'm going to go back to normal. Or if I'll ever be normal again." He admitted, softer in his voice now that his mind didn't deem you as a threat.
"Normal can be lots of things." You said with a comforting smile. "It's normal to have a breakdown when you've nearly faced death. Multiple even. It's normal to feel fine one moment then not in the next. Healing isn't linear, and when you come to terms that you have a right to feel upset and a right to exist without being held to any expectations of others or what you think others want from you, it'll feel easier to just allow yourself to exist throughout the day. Not the perfect camp counsellor or a hero with no faults. Just as yourself."
He let your words sink in, his thumbs subconsciously rubbing over your knuckles, feeling the healed scars of your own from what he assumed must be from previous combat training. "I'm not that great as myself. You might find me disappointing."
You quirked your lips at that, and shook your head. "I don't believe in that one bit. You're already great just as you are now."
He raised a brow. "Even after trying to steal from your infirmary and having a mental breakdown past curfew?"
"Well, just be glad I was around because I'm much more understanding than Will would be with four hours of sleep."
"I am glad." He insisted. "That it's you."
"I'm glad it was me too." You reassured. "It is midnight though and there's Capture the Flag tomorrow, meaning someone's going to end up whining and moping in here in about eight hours so why don't you let me close shop and come by tomorrow, Castellan?"
"Luke." He corrected, giving you a smile you're sure must be the one the other campers rave about all the time. The charming one that made your heart stutter, even with half his face bandaged and eyebags resting below his caramel eyes.
"Luke." You tested it on your tongue tentatively, and it only seemed to spark an electricity between the two of you that you were sure he must've felt too. In the dark corner of the infirmary, with nothing but crickets and your hushed voice, you spoke again with a heavy heart when you needed to tell him to leave. "I have to close this place up or someone else might try and steal from the medicine cabinet, not that I thought it was possible before but.."
"Fine." He complied, getting off the bed and rising to his full height, towering over you and blocking the moonlight from your view. "I'll wait outside and walk you back to your cabin. It's the least I could do."
You tried not to seem too elated over the idea that you could spend a little more time with Luke, though you're sure your glowing smile must've shown. "Sure you're not just trying to improve your image around me, thief?"
He smirked, following you out to the front door while you wrestled for the keys in your pocket to lock up for the night. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
_
"What are you smiling about?"
You looked up from your daze to see Luke leaning over the door frame, watching you with a smirk over his face.
"Can't a girl smile just for the sake of it?" You bit back, cheeks flushing at the idea that he could've possibly seen your focus lingering a little too long on the bed he had sat on. "Why'd you drop out of Capture the Flag? You know your cabin's going to lose their streak to Ares at this point."
"Wanted to see someone." He replied with a shrug, pushing off the door frame to walk towards where you sat, leaning over your desk and watching you compile the latest stock of ambrosia into a box. "Plus, Athena and Hermes are joining for today so Annabeth's got it handled."
He shuffled his fingers along the edge of the table, outlining the curve before clearing his throat. "I heard you covering up for me just now, and I wanted to say thank you."
You looked up at him then, and his eyes seemed to convey that he was thanking you for more than just that. He looked like he wanted to say more, but didn’t know how to.
"Eavesdropping on me now?” You teased. “Careful or you might end up becoming obsessed with a poor, overworked healer."
He scoffed exaggeratedly. "You wish. Just take the thank you. Should've known not to show my gratitude to an Apollo kid."
You stuck your tongue out at him before going on about how mind-blowing it can be that some kids really did not have emotional intelligence when it came to basic decency. Listening to you ramble on as you went on to arrange your first aid kits, Luke realised for all the disappointment he has experienced in his life, maybe there was one good thing his father led him to.
a/n: Couldn't resist writing how this duo met because I live and die for banter. inspired by 'my reputation's never been worse so you must like me for me' trope which is what i live and breathe for. His reputation as the perfect golden boy is in shambles, and sunshine couldn't care less.
taglist: @stars4birdie @elysiandumbash @kehlanislefttoe @mqg125 @madzlovez @0revna0 @auroraofthesun1 @idli-dosa @buubsii @kaylasficrecs @that-daughter-of-hephaestus @itsdragonius @moonlightfoxs-cantina
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sugurouge · 3 months ago
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— kiss me, kiss me! ft. umemiya hajime, kaji ren, togame jo, sakura haruka, suo hayato x f!reader
content warnings! NONE! these are just some silly headcanons about your first kiss with them
a/n: sfw just feels so ooc for me
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— UMEMIYA kisses you on the back of your hand, finally breaking the slightly awkward stiffness between you both. You've been struggling with your attraction for a good time now, and while Umemiya reciprocates your feelings, there still remains a certain shyness in your relationship.
The chances are high that he just doesn't want to overwhelm you with his affection from the get-go. So he paces himself, tries to let you feel a little more secure before showering you in his love.
Until you join him in the gardens one late afternoon. Clumsy as you can sometimes be, you cut yourself with the gardening tools while only trying to be of help. Good thing Ume is always prepared. He quickly kneels down in front of you to tend to your wounds, yet slowly but surely loses himself in your shared conversation.
As your eyes lock, he wets his lips, longing to finally feel your lips melt against his but decides to behave. Opting to instead place a small kiss over the light cut on your hand, it makes your heart flutter with joy as heat warmths your cheeks.
Then he gets up, resting a hand right beside your thigh on the bench for support, as he leans in. To your surprise, you don't shy away and meet his curious gaze, your mouths so close that you share the same breath before he closes distance and surrenders to his desires. The feeling of his lips on yours is soft, a little hesitant at first, but soon all of his emotions pour into this sweet moment with you.
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— KAJI seems almost emotionless after you kiss him for the first time. Yet his exterior may appear stoic, inside he is overthinking, trying to analyse the strange emotions your little display of affection has stirred in his heart. You kissed him on the cheek in the heat of the moment, with no regrets, until it all turns into a staring contest between you and the guy of your dreams.
You notice his lips moving but fail to hear a word as your heartbeat drums in your ears before he leans in and kisses you in return—or more accurately, rests his lips on yours and pulls back again. It wasn’t really a deep kiss, but it left you both feeling flustered nonetheless.
Unlike your joyful attitude, Kaji looks displeased for the remainder of the day, with a snappy attitude towards anyone who approaches him. How could he fail like that? What a loser, are just a few of the thoughts coursing through his mind.
He will make up for the awkward peck later that night when he catches you outside your home. Prepare for a long and deep kiss in the seemingly safe dark of the streets, if only the old ladies from across weren’t watching like you’re acting in a soap opera.
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— SAKURA, despite his looks and standoffish behaviour, will not initiate anything. He feels weirdly shy and can be a little emotional beneath his facade. If only you could look inside his mind and see the thoughts that plague his mind: He wants only what's best for you and doesn’t really think he can be that.
While he is in love with you, he won't cross a safe line. It still gives you time to chicken out, to leave him without a sour aftertaste. So here you are, stuck with lingering touches, maybe his fingertips play with your hair, or a gentle hand that rests on your shoulder. So it falls upon you to act for the sake of both of you.
He’s just so putty in your hands once you finally dare to grasp his face and look into those beautiful eyes of his. Sakura doesn’t pull away; he simply looks into your kind eyes while you lean in. He closes his eyes before your lips actually meet and kisses you back immediately.
He prolongs the kiss, turning it into a more passionate exchange. Even following your lips when you pull back for a desperate breath of fresh air, and then kisses you again, practically stealing the air out of your lungs.
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— TOGAME kisses you anywhere but your lips. Cheek? Yes! Forehead? Absolutely! Tip of your nose? Yes, please! He doesn’t even spare the back of your hand or the crown of your head. And while all these kisses are sweet and make your heart race, you can’t help but feel like your lips are somehow poisonous to him.
Similar to Sakura, you have to take the initiative with Togame as well. It’s best not to overthink this moment with him and simply turn your head the next time he leans in to kiss your cheek.
You’ll get him surprisingly flustered at first, pretty green eyes staring at you widely. Then a silly little remark slips past his lips about you “being awfully straightforward tonight.”
Jo takes your move as a sign to view your lips as free real estate from this moment on and will continue to kiss you at every opportunity. It doesn’t matter where or when, or who could possibly be watching. This guy has bottled up his deep desire for you for far too long and is now utterly addicted to you and your lips.
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— SUO and you are all hushed giggles and whispered confessions behind your hands. You feel nothing but comfort with him, no pressure or second guessing. Maybe that is exactly why the next time you lean in to whisper something into his ear, you call out his name in a tone, like you're up to no good. Soft lips voice every single syllable to his name, his heart may already be stumbling in its beat.
Your eyes meet in the small space shared, his lips already brushed over yours as the call of his name had is head nearly snap towards you. You may as well lean in fully, to leave a gentle kiss on his lips.
But you don't even give him time to react with how quickly you pull back again. Your little chuckle is your awful attempt at playing cool, unwilling to admit how flustered you get because of a silly little kiss. It seems like a good call to rise and stand on your feet, to quickly walk off and allow your hammering heart to calm down before your facade crumbles.
Unsurprisingly enough, Suo is quick to recover from the pleasant surprise you just graved him with. So he stops you in your tracks, fingers wrapping around your wrist to pull you back down, right on his lap. “You can't leave me now, sweetheart,” he searches your eyes, revels in watching you grow timid under his open affection. The determination in his gaze is unfamiliar yet attractive as he gently cradles your cheek to bring your lips back to his own and kiss you deeply.
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dividers by @/cafekitsune
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ohbo-ohno · 1 month ago
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idk if any of you have peacock/have seen ads for their show "teacup" but i can't stop thinking of smth similar with ghost (entirely unedited)
like, you buy a house out in the middle of nowhere - maybe a cabin, just to get away from society a bit. and you say you won't stay for long, but then you get used to things, start enjoying the peace and quiet you get away from all other human life, and you just... stay.
and then one day you go outside, and there's a giant spray painted ring around your house - enough for you to walk a bit but not so much that you can reach your garden. and there's a man standing maybe fifteen feet past the line, wearing a mask that covers his face, but clearly just staring at you. he's massive, casts a shadow that crosses over the line, but almost unnaturally still.
he tells you that he won't cross the line, that everything past it is still yours and safe. but if you cross the line in any way, you're his. the fact that you won't last long without food from your garden isn't something that needs to be said, you're already taking stock of the food inside your pantry.
you'd gotten comfortable out here in the wilderness, with your garden producing everything you could want. you never got into canning - bought a book on it, but never even cracked the spine. it's so much work, and you were perfectly happy with going to the garden before dinner and throwing something together with what you could get.
but now you're stuck. you see the man outside your window sometimes, walking around and around and around the circle, never passing it. every room in your house has a window, and there are days where you feel like he's following you, every time you glance outside he's just there.
you don't see him at night. you have no idea where he goes - god knows if he ever sleeps, you're not sure if he's even human - but you can't see him in the dark. the light from your windows doesn't stretch to the line, and the moon isn't enough to make him visible. once the sun goes down, he's just gone.
that's what gives you the nerve to step outside one night, long after it's gotten dark. you're hardly breathing as you tip-toe towards the line, eyes trained on your poor neglected garden - it's been several days since he first arrived, and no one has tended to your poor food. you're not even sure what you'll be able to get, if he's really gone.
he seems to be, or at the very least you certainly can't see him when you stop right at the edge of the line and look around. your flashlight illuminates the edge of the forest as you scan the trees, the circle of light smaller than you'd like. there's nothing.
you stand there for several more minutes, just staring at the food only a few feet out of reach. there's plenty of food that you know has already gone to waste, but you're hoping, praying there's enough to fight off your hunger just a bit, just long enough that you can think past the ache in your stomach long enough to attempt a plan.
(you'd been unable to think the first 24 hours, a creature of panic and nothing more. by the time you'd calmed even a bit, you'd been so hungry you could hardly breathe, then gotten sucked back into your panic after one look at your barren pantry. why had you never bothered to save food?)
your first step over the line feels like a crime. you almost squeeze your eyes shut just to wait for something to happen, but you force yourself to keep your flashlight active, not letting your eyes settle as you scan the forest again and again.
each step feels like you're stepping on glass, heart in your throat. it's dead silent in a way you've come to know the forest never is. the only thing keeping you from darting back inside is the desperate, animal need to eat.
you fall to your knees at the edge of your garden, plucking as many cherry tomatoes from the vine as you can, shoveling them in your mouth without even checking for bugs. there's nothing here but you and then man in the forest.
they burst on your tongue, cold and juicy and tangy and delicious. you feel delirious, having gone more than three days without eating by this point. the tomatoes could be spoiling on the vine, dotted with rot, and you'd still savor them like they're nectar.
you drop your flashlight after the first mouthful, desperate to use two hands and grab as many of the fruits as possible. the light illuminate just a small section of the trees ahead of you, blades of grass casting high shadows.
you only notice how much you've lost focus when the flashlight flickers off next to you. you can't move for a moment, juice dripping down your chin, paralyzed at the thought that he's somehow snuck up on you, made it to your side and taken your only light.
but he's not by you, you're still alone. you can feel it acutely, some instinct at the back of your head saying predator near, hide but not screaming in the way it had on that first day, when you'd been closest to him.
still, you're on your feet in the next moment, fruit abandoned in the dirt as you sprint back to your cottage. your not far from the circle, just mere feet, but it feels like an insurmountable distance.
you can feel him, he's right there you know it. the forest is quiet, the only sound the crunch of grass beneath your feet and your heavy breaths, but you swear you can hear his voice echoing in your head. not an inch past that line, love. then you're mine.
it's not a surprise when you're tackled to the ground, not really. still, you scream, tomatoes already churning in your gut and bile gathering in your mouth. your nails claw desperately at the colored grass, so fucking close to your safe haven, your cage.
"got you," he hisses over your shoulder, so heavy over you that you can hardly get in a breath. you scream soundlessly, face contorted in tear as you break your nails in your desperate digging. "you're mine."
the lights from your cottage seem like hardly more than the flame at the end of a matchstick as you're dragged away, your strength nothing compared to his as you're taken further and further from the safe haven he'd allowed you. by the time you hit the tree line, you don't have the energy to even try to scream.
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flippinpancakes64 · 4 months ago
Note
cullens w/ a reader who lovesss to cuddle?
The Cullens with a Cuddly S/O
Currently fighting the sleep demons rn so Idk if this will even make sense but whatever full send
Thank you for requesting and I hope you like this
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Edward:
We already know he's down
I mean like half of the first book/movie is him watching Bella sleep
He just likes to be nearby
So cuddling up to your side is no burden to him
He'll ask a lot if you're too cold or if you want him to move
He just wants you to be comfortable
After you've established that you do, indeed, like his cuddles, expect them all the time
If the time or place allows him to be right by your side, he is there
"Hey I just rented a new movie, do you wanna come over and watch it?"
"What movie?"
"Uh-"
"I'm on my way, have my blankets ready."
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Alice:
She's a pretty energetic person
So I feel like she'd need to either be doing something or talking
So yes she will cuddle, but she needs the TV on
Or she needs to be talking your ear off
She loves being so close though
She's like a lizard she loves the warmth
She doesn't mind if you fall asleep, she'll keep talking
But especially if it's late at night, she loves being so close to you
Btw she's the little spoon or literally laying on top of you
I would recommend investing in a nice heated blanket
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Jasper:
I have a feeling he'd love it
He strikes me as the type to be able to stare at a wall for hours on end and not get bored
So he doesn't mind laying with you the whole night
He would lay in one spot for days if you wanted him to
He would be so happy when you asked him the first time though
He has a bit of a hard time grasping that you actually do love him, so small reminders like this go a long way
Is another one who's hyper-aware
Constantly making sure you're comfortable
He would find your even breaths and calm mind soothing
It's his new favorite couples activity btw
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Rosalie:
I've mentioned it before but I think she's active at all hours
Either she's at school, hunting, or working on her cars
She just doesn't like to be bored
So cuddling isn't her favorite
Not to say she won't do it
Just that she won't do it for super long stretches of time
She'll cuddle for a movie, or until you go to sleep
But then she likes to get back to doing something
It's understandable, you can go to sleep, she can't
If you ask her to, though, she will stay the whole night
And she won't complain
She also doesn't have a preference on cuddling position
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Emmett:
He's definitely more into like casual cuddling
Does that make sense?
Like he loves holding you close on the couch while he's watching a game
And he loves sitting you in his lap when he's playing a card game or doing homework
But he doesn't really like laying in bed for hours
So sort of similar to Rosalie
He just gets restless
He's squirmy too
He wakes you up throughout the night because he moves so much
Cruel injustice
But on the bright side, if he was able to sleep he'd be a loud ass snorer so at least you don't have to deal with that
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Esme:
She would be another snuggle enjoyer
She loves the closeness of it
It makes her feel so connected to you
And she has no qualms about when or where
It's the middle of the day and she's outside working on the garden but you want to cuddle?
Okay just let her shower first
She would prefer to be the little spoon
Idk why that's just how it is
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Carlisle:
Carlisle "Cuddle" Cullen
Anytime, anywhere
He just misses you a lot when he's at work
So he loves to make up for lost time by having you right there with him
Loves doing paperwork with you in his lap
Or having his arms around you at all times
And of course he will lay with you for the whole night
He tends to lay on his back
But that's just his natural
He will move however you need him to
He only cuddles fully clothed tho
He knows he's cold
So he knows you will need the extra layers between you two
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Vampire! Bella:
She's always down
Sleeping is one of the things she misses the most about being human
So laying there with you while you sleep is the closest she can get to the real thing
She likes to cuddle while facing you
Face to face yk
But her one bad habit is that she forgets that she is freezing
Chronically puts her hands under your shirt or her toes behind your knees
"Ah! Cold!"
"Shit, sorry"
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phyrestartr · 4 months ago
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If We Had Lived (Divine Favour) | Sukuna x Kitsune!Reader
W/C: 3k #SFW, fluff, mentions of past abuse, heian sukuna, typical kitsune shapeshifting, jp mythology, morally grey reader, DRABBLE
tags: @kamote-kuneho @nyanwko @kamote-kuneho @better-imagination-9 @3zae-zae3 @chibiduck @kiiyoooo @lukaijah @memedealer-exe @f0th3rr @boretheral @cicithemess @paastaboi @someone0vx
--
“Sit still.”
“I'm sitting fucking still, fox.”
Sukuna did not sit still. He shifted and huffed, not unlike an annoyed, restless bull locked up in a pen–only, he was far from being in a pen and could leave whenever he so wished. 
Yet, he stayed. He endured the torture you, his prized possession, put him through for the sake of making good impressions or whatever. But the harvest festival was hardly a big deal–the last time the king was bestowed a gift of any value was when he found himself the owner of a beautifully annoying fox that hid in his garden for a fucking eternity. A prize like that was unlikely to be given again. What else could possibly excite the man who had everything?
Your tails swished behind you dramatically as you shifted on your knees, tilting your head to look over the work you'd done with cleaning and manicuring his nails and hands. Thankfully, you left callouses in place. Not that he thought you'd be so cruel as to remove them, but you certainly had the ability to, considering how soft your own hands were. 
“How much more?” Sukuna grumbled.
Your eyes flicked up to his for a moment before returning to your task. “I've hardly finished one hand.” 
The king scowled as a child might as you continued gently pushing at his cuticles with the slim, soft stick of an orange tree, carved specially for this occasion. Sure, he was the one who demanded you to turn your self-preening onto him, but still--
Your soft, warm touch cupped under his jaw and lifted his pouty gaze to meet yours. “You asked this of me,” you reminded. “If you've changed your mind, I've other tasks to attend to.” 
Sukuna’s lip twitched in an ugly, childish snarl. “You'll stay here and finish your job.” 
“Very well.” You leaned up toward him and kissed the spot between his brows before sitting again. But Sukuna followed you, bowing his head to chase a proper kiss that you gave freely, the kind spirit you were. “Then you will have to sit still.” 
“Tch.” But he obliged to the best of his abilities. “Already gonna have to sit still for hours while those damn peasants show up and dump scraps at my feet,” he sighed, pulling up a knee and resting an elbow on it. 
“My, a kingly thing is complaining about fealty?” You wondered, sarcastic yet cripplingly honest. “While I understand your unwillingness to do anything but fight and kill, you must remind those beneath you of your status.” 
Sukuna scoffed. “Yeah? Then why isn't my kyuubi doing just that?” 
“I am no king,” you said. “I am simply the servant of one, no? Given to him as a mere offering, yet kept alive for his amusement.” 
“Huh. Guess you know your place.” Sukuna shifted, and he noticed you pick up the pace, tending to him a bit quicker lest the restless beast lose his patience and leave with the job incomplete. He wouldn’t leave, not when he hungered for your attention and touch more than anything else the pathetic world could offer him–only something from the divine plane could satiate him. 
“Mh.” You raised his hand and pressed his knuckles to your lips, then against the soft plushness of your cheek. “My place is by my king’s side. It will forever remain that way.” 
You left his side. You left him, your pious saviour, your sworn king, your chosen mate, in favour of–what? Freedom? Adventure? Men? Women? What was it? 
Thunder echoed in Sukuna’s chest as he paced. He’d swept through towns, destroyed any houses you might have been sequestered in, searched vacant shrines and the like, but never caught a glimpse of your ebony tails nor your decorated kimono. It drove him mad. How had he not noticed? Did the harvest festivities really engulf his mind? Sure, they were more eventful this year, what with clansmen attempting revenge in the name of their fallen brethren, but it’d only been a week of problems–nothing challenging, nothing that really, truly required his full attention. And still–
“Sukuna-sama,” Uraume called, interrupting his buzzing thoughts. 
“What?” The king snapped, turning on his heel to face Uraume standing at his chamber door. “If this is about anything other than my fucking fox, then–”
“Please, come,” they said. “I believe I’ve found an explanation.” 
Sukuna’s eyes narrowed. Uraume sounded calm, not that they ever sounded particularly frantic, but they seemed…happy, maybe? Some weird kind of content, perhaps. It wasn’t something Sukuna was used to seeing on their placid face, though it’d become more common ever since you entered their lives and made yourself at home. The frost sorcerer had a soft spot for you. Sukuna couldn’t blame them. 
“Pray tell what the fuck the explanation is,” Sukuna grumbled as he followed his subordinate, arms all crossed and tensed. 
“I’m certain I’ve found the whereabouts of your beloved.” Uraume slid open the door leading to the gardens in the back and walked on. “In the absence of (Name), I decided to tend to the gardens myself. In doing so, I found something quite peculiar–a hidden grove of sorts.” 
Sukuna’s fury morphed into prickling, fiery intrigue. “Bullshit. I’ve been all over this fucking garden with that fox. I know the ins and outs.”
“Then it would not surprise me if he indeed kept this a secret from you.” 
Sukuna grumbled. “He knows better.”
“I don’t believe it’d be intentional,” Uraume said, “but I believe his instincts may have influenced him to secure a quiet, safe place for the future.”
The king relaxed. Electricity sparked weakly in his fingertips first,then throughout the rest of his body when everything started falling into place–you wanted all eyes to be on him, you didn’t want anyone to look at you during the festival. Your cheeks had grown fuller, your body more plush, your desire to snuggle and snooze went through the roof. Could you have been–?
Uraume stepped toward a thicket of trees in the far corner of the garden–one that Sukuna indeed had never bothered with, considering it looked full of trees and foliage and definitely not a spot to meander on your shared morning walks–before ducking under thick branches and pushing aside flimsy bushes. 
Sukuna followed with a little more brute force, nearly ripping the pesky foliage out of the way and half-considering decimating the trees that dare whip him in the face with a cluster of leaves. But you’d probably get pissy if he did that. A pissy fox was fun, but also withheld sex, and that was a no-go for Sukuna these days, considering his concubines just weren’t doing it for him as of late. 
Sure enough, Uraume’s words rang true. The grove was small and cozy, letting in warm dappling sunlight while shielding itself from the prying eyes of the outside world. In the very corner of the garden and the evident centrepiece of the grove, stood an immense weeping willow, one with a formidable trunk and thick, gnarled branches reaching up to drape long curtains of green like cascading waterfalls around itself. Truly, it felt like a separate little world would be hidden in there, behind swaying vines and rustling leaves. 
“You gotta be shitting me,” Sukuna muttered, stepping past his right hand to push aside the foliage, revealing a black fox curled up in the hollowed trunk of that very tree. 
You didn’t stir when he approached. Something uneasy curled in Sukuna’s gut, but once he sat himself in front of the mouth to your little den, he spied the steady breathing shifting your small form, and calmed–until he saw something else wiggling against you, chirping and squeaking with pathetic, fragile voices. At first, he thought it was some sort of parasite sucking you of your lifeforce, but he realized too quickly that what he beheld were two, tiny kits, both covered in fluffy brown-black fur, both keenly aware of the presence of a curious new man sitting before them. 
Sukuna tensed when they approached him. Their chubby bellies knocked their weak, stubby legs off balance, but they persevered best they could, bumbling their way through trampled leaves and grass, and finally reaching the crossed legs of the king. Tiny paws papped at his pant legs before they hazarded climbing the formidable mountain before them And despite Sukuna’s hesitation, he hastily held their butts before they fell off of him like the stupid, dumb babies they were. They were his stupid, dumb babies, after all. Best to take care of them. 
“It appears he went somewhere quiet to nest,” Uraume hummed, sounding far too pleased as they watched the king handle fox kits. “Perhaps the festival was too stressful.”
“Tch. Could’ve shot the runts out inside,” Sukuna mumbled, half-heartedly annoyed. “Coulda said somethin’.” 
“He could have,” Uraume agreed, an air of ‘but what’s done is done’ clinging to their words. 
Sukuna sighed. “What a pain in the ass.” His eyes flicked to you again. He expected you to wake up, to snap at him like the feral thing you were. He expected you to calm after recognizing him. Maybe he expected you to curl up in his lap, too. Or did he just want that?
But you stayed sleeping. Content and safe under the shelter of your lover and the stalwart embrace of a weeping willow. Perhaps it was thanking you for your kind care with the way it soothed your soul and kept you hidden away. Sukuna wouldn't doubt it for a second. The garden acted differently ever since you claimed it as your own. 
“Shall we take them back?” Uraume asked.
The king thought for a long moment, sifting through selfish desires and rational decisions before coming to his conclusion: “Leave ‘em. He'll probably throw a damn fit if we interfere. You know how gods are–annoying and irrational as hell when they don't get their way.”
His subordinate smiled. “Very well.”
Winter’s first frost came, and you returned to his side. 
You woke him with a classic move–standing on his chest and staring at him expectantly until he woke up and gave you attention. You didn’t do it as much anymore, not ever since you found yourself in the midst of a thousand responsibilities and daily quests, but every once in a while, like when your lover would return from long journeys, you’d pester him endlessly for pets, scritches and kisses. 
But this time, once his heavy eyes opened, he not only saw you standing atop his chest, but a chubby pup caught in your maw, too. 
Sukuna blinked away his grogginess just as you gingerly placed the babe on his collarbone, tucking him underneath the king's chin. One of his large hands flew up to ensure the kit (his kit) didn't slip off when you let go and trotted away with purpose. 
“Fox,” Sukuna grumbled, displeased with your hasty retreat. Thankfully, you trotted back up to him a handful of moments later and placed a second ball of fluff on his chest before settling down beside him and watching. 
“Tch. Took you long enough,” the king huffed as he tried his damndest to be careful and gentle with the little ones. “Was about to drag your sorry ass in here myself.” 
I see. If you were so desperate for my company, you could have simply requested it, you countered. 
Sukuna sucked his teeth and huffed. “Like it woulda been that easy.” Nothing was that easy with you–and Sukuna liked it. If you gave in, if you tended to his every fleeting want and need, you'd be too boring, frankly. 
It is unlike you to not try. You shifted and wormed your way into his arms and half onto his chest, right beside the two snoozing kits you'd worked hard to bring up while Sukuna was off fighting, killing and maiming. But that was expected; servants and bedded beasts were to stay and make a home, weren't they? 
“Tch. I let you have your way for once and this is how you act?” Your partner admired your foxen features and traced his fingertips along your snout, between your eyes, to the top of your little skull before scritching behind your ears. You leaned into the touch, eyes falling closed with the meagerest offering of affection.
Shall I praise you and bow at your feet once I am able? You teased. 
“Bending over'll do the trick.” Sukuna smirked when you huffed. “How long you gotta stay as a shitty mutt anyway?” 
Until they wean. I'm not certain as to how long that will take.
“Not even a guess?” 
Perhaps another week or so. You turned your nose to the two small fluffs and groomed the tops of their heads. They're becoming more independent. More willing to explore. I take that as a good sign for their development. 
“Huh. Good.” A strange coil relaxed in Sukuna's chest, and he braved petting them with a single finger again. “‘N how long ‘til these two learn to play human?” 
Not for some time, but I will help them until they master it themselves. You nipped at Sukuna's hand as a third rose to come pester you. You should not pray for them to be human too soon. They will terrorize you. I have seen such chaos before. 
Sukuna grinned. “Ho? You forget who their father is?” Your sigh echoed in his mind, and his smile split wider. “I can handle anything.”
Kazuya and Genji took too much after you and your mischievous heritage. 
Too often Uraume would find them in baskets of produce, happily munching away like they were supposed to be in there. Other times, they'd be caught stealing shiny jewelry or knick knacks from the king's concubines and servants. They'd sometimes even take Sukuna's clothes and run amok with them, using them as toys or completely shredding them. 
You, he who had birthed and raised them, were swift when it came to correcting them. You were, of course, the prime example of a kitsune, and therefore found their treasure stashes, foretold of their destructive crimes, and knew when they'd be off to steal food. You were like them, once, after all. 
And maybe that's why you had a peculiar pep to your step. Once the boys found their devious personalities, you bothered lifting your tails from the floor. No longer did you let them drag and droop like limp noodles hanging from chopsticks. You seemed…prouder. Livelier. Perhaps being amongst your own gave you a sense of belonging, of hope. 
Belonging, huh? Tch, what a load of shit. Sukuna mused as he rested his cheek against his fist, lounging while he watched you wrangle the twins from his spot under a shady tree. Spring was here, and that meant the runts were now terrorizing the great outdoors. 
More accurately, they were following you around like two tiny shadows, too eager to waddle after you as you moved along the paths, sowing seeds and pruning withered leaves as you went. The tots picked up whatever your tending cast to the ground, and they held each thistle, leaf and twig close in tiny, pudgy hands like they were rabbit's feet. Strange little things.
He lost sight of you and the bumbling babies eventually, but your light chatter flitted through the brush and kept him company for a time. The sound of leaves crunching underfoot accompanied your walk as you came back around, closer and closer and–through the garden itself? Wait–
“RAH!” A little voice cried before a littler body launched onto Sukuna. 
“Ha?” The king quirked a brow and looked at the little thing biting and kicking at his arm like a spastic cat. “What the hell is this?” 
“He's trying to play with you,” you said as you wandered back into view, voice airy and light. “They wrestle.” 
Sukuna held his arm up to get a better look at the runt nibbling on him. “This is supposed to be playing? Damn thing's acting feral.” 
“Because he's young.” You settled down beside your lover, adjusting your robes and such to ensure they cascaded and pooled around you attractively. “One day, he'll ask you to teach him how to fight. How to use cursed techniques.” 
Sukuna's expression almost softened. “Huh. That so?” 
“Mh.” You smoothed Kazuya's hair back as he settled in your lap, choosing peace over violence, unlike Genji. “They are yours. I've no doubt they'll have the same hunger for strife and knowledge.” 
They are yours. The words nearly made Sukuna sick; they weren't his per sè, they were a result of his relentless attempts to tie you down and make you stay with him no matter the cost. They only shared half of his genetics, they didn't rule his every thought nor own half of his heart. That all belonged to you.
But then why did he feel…trepidatious? The way he once felt too long ago when he knew nothing of the world and met too many cruel hands from the moment he opened his eyes. Maybe because these little ones were that age, able to run around and cause problems where they ought to not. Maybe because messing with the wrong person might not end with them slaughtering he who had the audacity to harm them, but with their young lives being lost. 
Ah. That must have been it–the petulance of his own kind pissed Sukuna off to no end. The thought of extensions of himself being looked down on brought about creeping waves of disgust and distaste. Humans were the ones who thought themselves godly enough to kill Sukuna. Humans were the ones who thought themselves mighty enough to enslave and breed a divine beast. The little ones were destined to share humanity's ire, and it pissed him off. It really pissed him off.
“Yeah,” Sukuna decided, shaking his arm to test Genji's ability to cling onto him. “I'll show ‘em a thing or two. Can't have humans beating the shit outta some godlings just for fun.”
“Well, if one were to try, I'd kill them myself,” you cooed like it was the most romantic thing in the world. “Level their village, light the sky ablaze.” 
“Now you're speakin’ my language,” Sukuna said, grinning. 
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jetii · 5 months ago
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Home is a Place on Coruscant
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Pairing: Captain Rex x fem!Reader
Words: 10,705
Tags/Warnings: 18+ only! angst, hurt/comfort, discussion of grief/death, some description of blood/injuries, mutual pining, friends to lovers, smut, dirty talk, a little brat taming, oral sex (m and f receiving), penetration, unprotected sex, light exhibitionism but not really
Summary: You've always been there for Rex, and when he shows up at your door in the middle of the night after a devastating mission, you do what you do best: take care of him.
A/N: The start of this fic has been sitting in my notes app since the TCW season finale many moons ago, and it wasn't until I read this drabble by @djarrex that I felt compelled to actually finish it. Rex is my fav and he deserves to be taken care of.
It's been about a decade since I've published a fic and about a decade since I've been active on tumblr, so I decided to start from scratch with this blog. Feedback is very much appreciated! I have a few more drafts in the works for Echo, Howzer, Kix, Tech, and Hunter that I'm planning to publish depending on the reception to this one.
Previous Work | Next Work | Masterlist
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Rain on Coruscant was rare. But when it came, it came in torrents, and it came all at once.
In the early hours of morning, while the planet was still sleeping, the sky opened up and let loose a downpour that threatened to flood the lower levels. It was so heavy, it even drowned out the traffic noise coming from the speeders that were still flying over the city at the early hour. The noise was soothing, almost like a lullaby, and the sound of it woke you.
You were used to this sound. You were used to it, because you were used to not being able to sleep for more than an hour or two at a time. It was one of the many things about living in the Jewel of the Core Worlds that was taking you longer than you would have liked to adjust to.
The traffic noise, the bustle, the crowds—it all made your homeworld of Rion seem very far away. You could never hear anything over the speeder traffic here, and you likely would've gone mad long ago if not for the trickling of the fountain you kept in the main room. It had been your mother's. You were glad it had come with you when you moved.
The rain was heavy enough that you could hear it inside the apartment, a pleasant hum against the transparisteel. You sat in the window seat, arms folded around your knees, watching the rain fall. The view from your window was not the best in the Galactic City, but it was still quite good, and at night it was beautiful, all the lights of the skyscrapers blurring together in the rain.
The rain would be good for the plants.
You had a garden, a modest one. Some of the plants were native to your world. A few were native to Coruscant. Most were from other worlds. They were your pride and joy. Caring for them had given you something to do when you were adjusting to your new life here. You watered and pruned and tended to them all, and in the spring you were rewarded for your efforts.
Rex had been baffled, at first, by the sight of you out in the courtyard behind the complex, on your knees in the dirt, digging and weeding. It was a little piece of nature on a planet that didn't have much, and Rex was amazed that someone could take so much joy in something so… natural. It was nothing like what he'd been raised to appreciate, which was a good vantage point, a well-maintained blaster, and a plan.
When he'd told you as much, you had invited him to kneel down beside you, and, hesitantly, he'd done so. You handed him a spade and pointed to a patch of soil.
"See that little green leaf poking up?" you asked, and Rex followed your gaze. "See it?"
"I see it."
"Plant the spade right under it. When you pull it up, the root will come with it."
"Like this?" Rex had pulled the spade up, and a plant had come with it. He examined it, then tossed it aside, into the compost.
"That's perfect. That's just how you're supposed to do it. See, you're a natural."
Rex smiled, pleased with the praise. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. Now, let's get the rest of these weeds."
You'd worked in the garden until the sun was setting. Your hands had been dirty, and you had been smiling, and Rex had thought you were the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.
He would probably never tell you as much. He'd been trying to think of ways to tell you, and nothing seemed good enough. There was nothing good enough for you. So instead he told you about the missions he went on. And you listened. You always listened.
You wondered if Rex had heard the rain start. You wondered if it was keeping him awake, too. You wanted him to sleep. He was always so tired, and the last thing you wanted was for him to be exhausted when he came home from his mission.
If he came home.
It was an irrational thought. The missions were dangerous, yes, but the 501st had some of the best soldiers in the galaxy. And Rex was a good captain. A good leader.
But there was always the possibility. The risk.
You were intimately acquainted with the feeling of waiting for someone, and the way it tore you apart. It was a risk, being this close to Rex and the other clones of the 501st. It was a risk, feeling the way you did.
It was a risk, but you did anyway.
You look out at the rain, and the speeders that still flew through it. You wonder how they could fly through the storm, and not be afraid.
You're just about to turn away from the window when a noise behind you makes you jump. There, underneath the sound of the rain battering against the transparisteel, the sound of a knock at your door. You almost don’t think it is real, that it's simply a part of the soundscape of the rainy morning, but it comes again, three short raps.
You slide out of bed, fumbling to grab the clothes you tossed on the floor the night before. You don't bother to put on pants, but pull a long shirt over your head and tiptoe to the door, peering through the peephole.
The rain is heavier now, and the clouds are dark, almost black. The white shape in the hall is familiar, though, and it makes your heart race. You open the door, filling the small entryway with the scent of fresh rainwater and humidity.
"Rex," you say. "What are you doing here?”
He’s stoic, still and silent under your gaze, but you can see the tremble in his hands at his sides. The downpour seems to have washed the majority of dirt and debris from his armor, but bits of red still run through the cracks. An hour ago, he was likely covered with whatever the substance was — Umbaran dust or something more sinister — but the rain did well enough to wash it off.
He must’ve walked here, you realize, eyes widening. Your bottom lip pulls to worry between your teeth as you notice the new dents and marks on him. Carbon scoring on his shoulder plate, a tear in his kama, and what seems to be a blaster hole in his chest plate.
"I… I don’t know," he says after a moment. His voice is quiet, rough through the modulation of his helmet. It's as if the words are being dragged up from his lungs.
"I shouldn’t have. I… I should have called. I just… I had to see you.”
The words hang between you, suspended like the raindrops in the air. You feel tears prickle at the corner of your eyes. You can't believe he's here. He's here, and he's alive. You'd known he would be, but to see him with your own eyes, to have him in front of you, fills you with an immense sense of relief.
But something is clearly wrong. He's not saying what's bothering him, and you're almost too afraid to ask.
“Rex, what happened?”
You reach for him, only to have your hand meet nothing but humid air as he pulls back.
“It’s late, sorry for disturbing you—“
He turns to go, and this time you’re faster. Your hand encloses around his wrist and pulls him to a stop before he can take another step.
“Wait, Rex— please, just… stay. Just for a moment. Come in, you're getting soaked."
He lets out a slow breath and then, after a moment, he jerks a stiff nod. He allows you to drag him inside your apartment and, as the door slides shut behind him, he lifts his hands to the seal of his helmet. You watch him closely as he pulls it free and reveals the face beneath.
There are smudges of grime on his golden skin, and a deep furrow has formed between his eyebrows. He looks haunted, as if the shadows from the battlefield have followed him home. You want to smooth that line out with your thumb, but you aren’t sure he will let you.
You don't ask if you can touch him, but he notices the way your fingers twitch, and he knows you well enough to know that you're thinking about it.
"It's fine," he murmurs. He's never said no to you. "Go ahead."
He doesn't say please, and that hurts a little, but you're not surprised. Rex has been holding you at arm's length ever since he kissed you a few months back, and you know why. You just wish you knew how to help him.
So, you touch him. You brush your fingers across his cheek, wiping away the grime. You know that he doesn't need to be cleaned, but the motions are soothing. Your gentle touch is a balm, and you can feel his tension ease ever so slightly as you brush your fingers over his face.
"What happened?" you ask again, voice barely above a whisper.
"A lot." He lets out a slow breath and leans a little into your touch. He's exhausted, and he's relieved to see you, and the two warring emotions are pulling him in different directions. Rex opens his mouth to say more, but the words die on his tongue. He shakes his head, unable to continue, and closes his eyes.
"Come sit down."
You take him by the hand and lead him over to the couch. You sit first, and he follows suit, sitting a respectable distance from you. The distance doesn't seem right. When you'd met him, Rex had been so full of confidence, even when he'd been a little bit awkward, a little bit unsure. But the war had changed him. He was still the same man, still confident and brave and intelligent, but the weight of responsibility had settled on his shoulders, and the burden was crushing him.
You want to tell him it's going to be okay. You want to say it, but the words sound hollow in your mind.
You shift, moving closer, and Rex moves, too. The distance between you shrinks, and the tension eases. You don’t much care that he’s wearing armor, or that the rainwater is leaving damp spots on the upholstery.
Rex reaches for you, and his hands tremble. His gloves are damp, and his armor is cold, and the chill sends a shiver up your spine when he touches your knee. His eyes are distant, and he doesn't quite meet yours, and his expression is so, so sad.
“Hardcase is gone,” he closes his eyes to avoid seeing the look on your face. You can’t help but gasp at the admission, and a soft sob slips past your lips.
You had met Hardcase once, very briefly. He had been charming and charismatic and kind, if a little wild, and you had liked him immediately. He had flirted with you, and Rex had rolled his eyes and tried to hide a smile behind his cup. Hardcase had been fun, and loud, and a little bit reckless.
You had not known him as well as some of the others on his squad, but the pain in Rex's eyes, the grief in his voice, was enough to make it hurt.
"Oh, Rex, I'm so sorry," you murmur.
Rex nods, and his jaw tightens. You can tell that he's trying not to cry, and you can't imagine how hard it must be, to carry such a heavy weight all by himself.
When he speaks again, your blood runs cold.
“We were betrayed. One of our own— one of the Jedi, he—" his breath hitches. “Oz, Ringo — Dozens of them, my brothers. They’re all gone.
"Betrayed?"
You feel like the bottom has dropped out from beneath you.
You knew the war was dangerous, and that Rex's job was dangerous, but the idea that it could go wrong in such a fundamental way?
The Jedi had always seemed so wise, and so strong, and so just. It had always seemed like there was nothing they couldn't do. To know that one of them could betray their men — could betray the Republic, and the innocent people of the galaxy — was too terrible to contemplate.
Your hand finds his cheek again, and this time, his eyes find yours.
They're shining, but his tears don't fall. He's a soldier, and he knows better than to show weakness, even here. You wish he would let himself break. You wish he would let you hold him, and let his tears fall, and let you help him put the pieces back together.
"Rex," you murmur, "I'm so, so sorry."
He leans into your touch, closing his eyes, and your thumb wipes away some of the wetness that has gathered there.
He pulls back for a moment, and you think he’s pulling away completely before he leans closer. His arms slide around your waist, pulling you tight to him as he buries his head in your shoulder. You immediately return the embrace, one arm over his shoulders while your other hand lifts to hold the back of his head.
You’re not sure how long they stay like that or how many tears are shed between you. After some time, he begins to speak, and you listen while running a soothing hand over his head, trying desperately to keep from sobbing outright as he tells you about the traitorous Jedi Pong Krell.
It’s by far the greatest atrocity you’ve ever heard, and to know that Rex has to put his helmet back on and get back to work in a matter of days makes you sick to your stomach.
He doesn’t deserve this, you think as you pull him into another embrace. None of them do.
Something about the motion causes him to wince, and you immediately release him to grab hold of both his shoulders.
“Are you hurt?” You ask, eyebrows knitting together in concern.
His hesitation is answer enough, and you can feel a wave of anger rise in your chest. How could they let him come back, in the state that he's in? How could they ask this of him, after all he's already done?
“I’m fine, cyare. Armor took most of it.”
If it weren’t for the way he avoided your gaze, you’d believe him, but instead you just feel yourself grow more upset. “What did Kix say?”
“Uh, he didn’t—“
“Rex, you were shot, and you didn’t think to get medical attention?”
His expression darkens, and you can see him withdrawing again. His shoulders pull back, and he pulls his chin up, and the distance between you grows again.
“I didn’t think much of anything, to be honest.” He mutters. It breaks your heart, but it also throws more coals on the anger burning inside of you. Not anger at him, you know, even though you can’t help but let out a sigh of exasperation. “I’ll be alright.”
“Like hell you will be,” you bite out before taking a step back to help him stand. “C’mon. Let’s get you patched up.”
You're angry. You're so, so angry. How could he let himself get hurt? How could he come here and not tell you about it? How could they send him home, to you, after all he's been through, knowing that he was injured?
But there's nothing you can do about any of that now, and being angry at him isn't going to help.
“You don’t have to—“ He protests through words only, allowing you to drag him through the living room and into the refresher.
“Yes, I do.” You shut him down quickly as you flick the light on and turn to rummage underneath your sink.
He’s still standing in the center of the room when you stand back up to full height, looking uncomfortable at your fussing. It’s not the first time you’ve had to patch him up, but so far it’s just been cuts and bruises. It’s unknown territory for you both, and he holds himself like he’s waiting for you to give up and shoo him out.
Your hands find his shoulders, and you gently push him down to sit at the edge of your bathtub. He’s pliant in your hold, but he meets your eyes with the worried pinch between his brows he gets whenever he thinks he’s upset you.
“Rex, let me take care of you,” you plead softly, and the furrow deepens.
He can hear the way your voice breaks. He can see the worry in your eyes. You're scared, and he hates that he's done that to you.
He should have known better. He should have taken a moment, to collect himself, before coming to see you. He shouldn't have let his emotions overwhelm him. He should have kept it together.
You were always there for him, and you listened, and he could tell you anything. He should have told you that he was okay. That would have been the responsible thing to do.
But he didn't. He couldn't.
And now, he can't seem to do the one thing you ask him.
But, after a moment, Rex relaxes. He’s never been able to say no to you before, and it is no different now. His shoulders slump a little, and the furrow smoothes, and you can't help but think that his face looks much nicer like this. You wish he wouldn't be so hard on himself.
"Okay," he murmurs.
It's all the encouragement you need. You lift his hand, cradling it gently, and begin to remove his gloves and armor piece by piece. You set the pieces aside, careful to keep them in order, and you know he appreciates that. It's a little thing, but it helps. You make a note to clean it for him before he leaves, the sight of the red smeared across its surface churning your stomach.
It's quiet between the two of you. The only sounds in the room are the rain and the gentle clink of plastoid against the floor as the last piece is removed.
You're grateful for the silence, though. You're not sure what you would say, and you know that he needs this, needs the moment to breathe.
"Where does it hurt?" You ask.
He hesitates. There's a lot of pain, all over his body. But you can't do anything about the pain that aches in his bones, or the ache in his chest. He doesn't know how to tell you about that.
"Chest," he finally admits. "Took a hit in the vest. Knocked the wind outta me."
That was an understatement, but you didn't need to know that. He could barely breathe, when it had happened, but the rest of his brothers needed him, and he didn't have the time to worry about his own injuries.
"Can you get it off?" You ask.
He gives a slight nod and reaches his arm up to grab the neck of his blacks, slowly pulling it overhead to reveal the skin underneath. Your eyes widen slightly at the sight of him, and you feel a flush rising up your neck and onto your cheeks.
The only light in the room is the faint glow from the bulb above the mirror. It casts shadows across the planes of his muscles, and you can't help but drink in the sight of him. His chest is strong and broad, and a line of hair disappears beneath the waistband of his blacks.
There's a blaster mark on his sternum, just above his right pec, not far off from the scar in the center of his chest he’d earned on Salucemi. It’s weeping blood slowly, trickling down the curve of his muscle, and you can see the red, puffy skin surrounding the injury.
It isn't terrible. A few inches to the left, and it could have been fatal. A few inches to the right, and the armor could have deflected the bolt entirely.
Still, you know that he's in pain, and the knowledge is enough to make the tears prickle at the corners of your eyes again. You force yourself to swallow them back and, instead, you reach for a damp cloth to wipe the wound clean.
He hisses at the contact, and you can see him grit his teeth against the pain. His hand moves to grasp the edge of the tub, and you can't help but feel guilty. You want to tell him to relax, to try and ease his suffering, but you know he wouldn't listen. He never listens, not when it comes to his own wellbeing.
"Sorry," you murmur, but the cloth keeps moving. You have to clean the wound, so you can treat it properly.
“Where’d you learn this, anyways?"
"What, first aid?" You're surprised by the question.
"Mhm."
“My dad was a swoop racer, believe it or not,” you say softly. You don't talk about him very often. It still hurts. But this feels like the right moment.
Rex tilts his head curiously, watching your face. You can see his expression soften, and you know he can tell how difficult it is for you to speak about this.
"Really?"
You nod, your eyes focused on your work. “My mom was always patching him up, and I’d sit on the counter and help out where I could. When she passed, I took over.”
“Isn’t swoop racing illegal?”
“Hm, not on Rion, it’s not.” You finish cleaning the wound and move to grab the bacta bandages. “Maybe if it was, he wouldn't have gotten himself killed."
You're not sure what possessed you to be so blunt, but the words are out, and there's no taking them back. Rex blinks, shocked by your honesty. You feel embarrassment creeping up the back of your neck.
"Sorry," you murmur, keeping your eyes low. "That was… I shouldn't have said that."
Rex says nothing. He knows better than to try and coddle you, and besides, you've always been the one doing the comforting, not the other way around. But it doesn’t sit well with him to see you like this, and before he knows what he’s doing, he reaches out to you.
His hand lifts, and he tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear. You can't help but lean into his touch. He's so warm, and his hand is calloused and gentle. He cups the back of your head, guiding you forward, and his lips press against your forehead.
You can feel the tears welling up in your eyes as the cloth slips from your fingers, and you cling to him. You feel terrible, for complaining about the loss of your father when Rex has lost so much.
"I’m sorry," he murmurs, and you're not sure if he means for asking or for Hardcase or for the war or for everything, and you can't bring yourself to ask.
“It’s alright,” you whisper back. He lets you pull away from him to busy yourself with sorting bacta patches, but you can feel his eyes on you.
"Is that why you came to Coruscant?” He asks softly, his tone careful and gentle.
Part of you wants to lie. You're tired, and you're hurting, and you're not sure you have the strength to have this conversation right now.
But the truth is already out, and if this will help him, you'll tell him anything.
You nod.
“He was actually really good at it,” you chuckle, and Rex can hear the bitterness in your voice. “But eventually he pissed off some powerful people who were placing the wrong bets. One day he left for a big race, and the next morning I found a box with his helmet at our doorstep. Or what was left of it.”
Rex sucks in a breath, and you can see his fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. He knew about the helmet, he’s seen it on the shelf in your living room. But he hadn't known the full story.
You look back up at him. There are tears in your eyes, but they don't fall. You're smiling, and your eyes are sad, and his heart breaks.
“I tried to get the police involved, the racing league, anyone I could get to listen to me, but no one would investigate. I was so angry. Then I started getting threats. I couldn’t…” You shake your head, trying to rid the memories. "I couldn’t stay. So I moved here. And then the war started, and then I met you.”
It seems like a lifetime ago. The days before Rex felt like someone else's life, and you wonder how you ever managed without him. You'd been so lost, and so alone, and you'd felt like the universe was crashing down on you, and he'd pulled you out from underneath the rubble just by being there.
"I'm so sorry, cyar'ika," Rex murmurs.
You reach forward and gently lay a hand on his chest, pressing the bacta patch into place. His skin is soft beneath your touch, and you can't help but think, not for the first time, about how beautiful he is.
"I'm glad that you're here," you tell him softly. "That you made it back, I mean. I'm glad you came home."
Home. Rex swallows thickly.
He's never had a home before, not really. Home had been a word for people with families and futures. Home had been a word for normal, everyday people, not clones.
Home had always seemed like such a far away concept, something he'd never get to experience.
But, suddenly, the idea isn't quite so foreign. Home. With you.
"I'm glad I came back too," he finally murmurs, and his hand lifts to hold yours.
You're quiet, your eyes tracing the lines of his face, and his gaze finds yours.
There's something different between the two of you, something charged and heavy. You know you need to pull away. He needs to rest. You're both exhausted.
But you can't. You can't stop looking at him. He's beautiful, and he's kind, and he's the bravest person you've ever known. You've never loved anyone the way that you love him.
"Cyare," he whispers, and the word makes your heart stutter, even if you don’t know what it means.
He's not sure what comes over him. Maybe it's the way you're looking at him. Maybe it's the fact that, after the past couple of weeks, he thought he'd never see you again. Maybe it's that, for once, you're letting him take care of you. Maybe it's because you're so beautiful and you're so close and he loves you, he's so in love with you, and he doesn't know how much longer he can stand to go without saying something.
Whatever it is, he knows he needs to say something, and he knows he needs to do it now.
"I'm so glad I met you," he whispers, and it's the best he can do, but he hopes it's enough.
He reaches forward, and his hand finds the curve of your cheek, and the touch is enough to send a spark through your skin. You can feel the heat building inside of you, the desire pooling in your core, and the air in the room is electric.
"Me too," you manage.
His lips find yours.
You gasp against his mouth, and your arms wrap around his shoulders, his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips. You're pulling each other closer, as close as you can possibly get, and it's not close enough.
Rex moans softly against your lips, and you can't help the way your hips twitch, or the way you whimper into his mouth. You're both desperate, and eager, and it's the sweetest relief.
He stands and turns, lifting you up and sitting you on the edge of the counter, and his body presses against yours. Your legs part, welcoming him, and his hips slot perfectly between them. His hands are on your thighs, gripping and pulling and massaging the flesh.
"Rex," you gasp, breaking away from his lips.
He takes the opportunity to press his lips against your throat, his tongue and teeth working the delicate skin. He sucks at your pulse point, and you whine. You know that there will be marks in the morning, but you can't bring yourself to care.
"Rex," you whine again, and you're not sure why, not exactly, because all you want is for him to keep doing what he's doing, to let him claim you and mark you and make you his. But you're overwhelmed, and you need to catch your breath, and his name is the only word your brain can think.
His fingers tighten, and his lips lift from your skin. He’s watching you with dark eyes and swollen lips, chest heaving.
"I need…" he trails off, and he doesn't finish the sentence, but you understand.
He's holding himself back. He doesn't want to push you, doesn't want to assume, but you can feel the need rolling off of him.
He's desperate.
You are too.
“Let me take care of you,” you whisper.
Rex sucks in a breath. There are a lot of things that he could say, but the only thing he can manage is your name, soft and needy, and you can hear the way his voice breaks.
The sound makes you ache.
Your hand finds his jaw, and your thumb runs along his bottom lip. He's looking at you with the most adoring eyes, and your heart feels like it's about to burst.
"Please," he breathes.
It's all the encouragement you need. Your lips find his, and his hands find your hips. He lifts you off of the counter and into his arms, and your legs wrap tightly around his waist. His fingers dig into the backs of your thighs, grabbing and holding and massaging the flesh. You're not sure how the two of you make it into the bedroom. All you can think about is Rex's lips, his teeth and tongue and hands, and the way he's carrying you like you weigh nothing, his hardness digging into your hip.
It's a miracle he doesn’t trip over the pile of dirty laundry on the floor.
His knees hit the mattress, and he leans down to lay you gently on the bed, his eyes never leaving yours. There's a tenderness to his actions, a sweetness in the way he handles you, that makes you shiver. His thumbs trace the lines of your hipbones underneath your shirt, and he smiles at the sound of your breath catching in your throat.
"Are you sure?" He whispers, and the words are enough to make you ache.
His hands are so gentle, his face so earnest. He's always been so careful with you, and it makes you feel like the most important thing in the world.
"Yeah," you whisper, your hand coming up to rest against the side of his face.
Rex's smile is so beautiful, and it's so full of joy, and you can't help but return it. He turns his head and presses a kiss into the center of your palm.
His lips move, tracing the lines on your palm. His teeth nip gently at the tips of your fingers, and he watches as your breath catches.
He wants to take his time, to learn every inch of you, to map out the places that make you moan and the ones that make you scream, and the ones that make you laugh. He wants to kiss the scars and worship the stretchmarks and the freckles, and the dimples in your skin, and the wrinkles in the corners of your eyes, and the birthmark on your shoulder, and he wants to show you how beautiful you are, how perfect, how special, how loved.
He'll do it, eventually. But not tonight.
Tonight, he just needs you.
His fingers dip underneath the hem of your shirt, drawing it up slowly, and he can't help the groan that falls from his lips at the sight of you. You're suddenly, painfully aware of the fact that you'd never put on pants when you answered the door, let alone a bra, and you're almost embarrassed.
But the way Rex is looking at you after your shirt is tossed aside makes your stomach flutter, and the words die on your tongue.
"Mesh'la," he breathes, his eyes wide.
He can't seem to decide where to look, where to touch first, so you grab his hands and guide them. They slide across the planes of your stomach and over your ribs, and his fingers ghost the underside of your breasts, and your head falls back onto the pillows.
"Rex," you beg. "Please."
The sound of your plea is enough to spur him into action. His lips find the side of your neck, and his hand cups your breast, thumb finding your nipple and swiping over it.
You gasp, your back arching and hips bucking into his, and Rex moans softly. His teeth graze the line of your pulse, and he moves lower, and he pulls a nipple into his mouth.
"Fuck," you whimper, your nails scratching at the back of his neck.
You can feel the smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. He likes having this effect on you.
The hand on your other breast is kneading the flesh, and his lips are sucking at your nipple, his tongue tracing patterns on the delicate skin. His fingers pinch and pull, and you can feel the heat building between your legs.
"So sensitive," he hums, and the vibrations from his words send a tingle down your spine.
"Only for you," you breathe.
The words make his hips stutter, and the hardness of his cock presses into the wetness of your core. You can feel the outline of him against you, the heat and the thickness, and your breath catches.
You roll your hips into his, and Rex releases a groan, his teeth sinking into the soft skin of your breast.
"Kriff," he hisses, and the sound sends a shock of pleasure through you. Suddenly, you remember your promise.
"Lay back," you whisper, and his head lifts.
"What?"
You push at his shoulders, mindful of his bandages as you urge him backwards, and Rex follows your command. You move quickly, kneeling between his legs and grabbing the waistband of his blacks. You can see the outline of his hardness straining against the fabric, and you can't help but lick your lips.
"Can I?"
Rex's chest is heaving, his eyes blown black, and you can tell he's trying to process your question.
"Cyar'ika," he breathes, and the endearment makes your heart flutter. "You don't have to."
"I know," you tell him, your hand moving slowly up and down his thigh. Your head tilts thoughtfully. "Can I be honest?"
"Always," he replies.
"I've wanted to for a while."
You can feel the blush creeping up the back of your neck, and your eyes dart away from his. You don't know why, it's not like you've been hiding your attraction, but something about telling him is making you nervous.
"You have?"
His voice is soft, and his hand finds the back of your head. His touch is so gentle, and the surprise and happiness in his tone makes you bold.
"Yeah," you murmur, looking back up at him.
He looks stunned, but there's a light in his eyes, a warmth that you can feel spreading inside you too. "Why didn't you say anything?"
You shrug. "I didn't want to push."
It's his turn to blush. It's cute, the way his cheeks flush, and his eyes dart away. He almost looks embarrassed.
"Since we're being honest…" He starts.
"What?"
"Me too."
Your heart stutters, and a wide grin stretches across your face. The happiness building inside your chest is competing with the desire that courses through you at the knowledge that he's thought about this, about you, and the idea is almost too much. You're sure you must look like a fool smiling this much, but you can't bring yourself to care.
"You've thought about it?" You tease.
"Yeah," he breathes. "All the time."
"Tell me."
He groans, his fingers tangling in your hair, and you can see the way his cock twitches at your words. "I… Kriff, I've imagined it so many times. How good you'd look on your knees, with my cock in your mouth, or bent over, with my hands on your hips, or straddling me, riding me."
"What else?"
You've moved closer to him, and his fingers tighten in your hair, and you can feel the wetness between your thighs. You've never felt so desperate, so needy, and all you want is him, any part of him.
"I think about it all the time. What it would be like to have you in the barracks, in the 'fresher, in the hangar. You on your knees in my office. Fuck, everywhere. It's all I can think about sometimes."
You can feel the wetness growing between your thighs, and you can't stop the whine that falls from your lips. It's almost too much, hearing the things he's imagined, the ways he's wanted you, the times and places, and the need and desperation behind his words.
"Then will you let me?" You ask, and you hope the answer is yes, because you can't imagine stopping.
"Please," he breathes.
"What was that?"
Rex's grip on your hair tightens, his gaze locked on yours as he speaks again, his voice is low.
"Please, cyare."
That's all the encouragement you need. Your eyes don't leave his as your hands pull at the fabric, slowly revealing his length. He's bigger than you dared to imagine, and thicker, and the sight of him is enough to make your mouth water.
His eyes are wide, his pupils blown, and his mouth is hanging open slightly. The blush on his cheeks is spreading down his chest, and the muscles in his arms are tensed.
"So perfect," you hum, and you're not sure if you're talking to him or his cock.
You wrap your hand around him, and Rex's hips stutter. Your thumb swipes over the head, spreading the bead of precum, and his eyes fall shut.
"So sensitive," you tease.
"Cyare," he warns. There's an edge to his voice, and it makes you grin.
Your head dips down, and you press a kiss to the underside of his cock, and his hips jerk. You keep pressing kisses along his length, your fingers wrapping around the base. Rex is struggling to breathe. He's not even inside of you yet, and it already feels better than anything he's ever experienced before.
He opens his eyes to look down at you, and the sight of you on your knees in front of him is almost too much. He's dreamed about this moment, and fantasized, and he never, not in his wildest dreams, imagined that it would feel like this.
Your lips wrap around him, and Rex can't stop the way his hips thrust up. His cock brushes the back of your throat, and you gag, pulling back slightly with tears in your eyes.
"Sorry," he gasps, his cheeks flushing.
You shake your head as much as you can with his length in your mouth, and your eyes flash up to his.
You like this, he realizes with a start. You like being used, you like the feeling of him fucking into you, and the realization sends a shock of pleasure through him.
You bob your head slowly, and Rex watches, transfixed, as his cock disappears between your lips. Your tongue runs along the underside, and his eyes fall shut again.
"Maker," he moans.
Your hand is stroking what doesn't fit into your mouth, and your other is tracing the lines of his thighs, and his abs, and his V-lines. You can feel the muscles tensing and relaxing under your fingertips, and you can see the way his hips are straining, the effort he's making to keep still.
Your name falls from his lips like a prayer, and you hum softly in response. His fingers tighten in your hair, pulling gently, and his other hand comes to rest on the back of your head.
"Fuck, mesh'la," he moans, and the praise makes you preen.
You pull back, until only the head is between your lips, and swirl your tongue around him. He tastes sweet and salty and just the right amount of bitter, and you can't get enough.
"So good," he gasps. "So perfect, so beautiful."
He's babbling now, the words falling from his lips without him thinking about them, and you can't stop the grin. You'd always wondered if he was a talker.
"So perfect, cyar'ika, taking me so well." His voice is wrecked, and his breath is coming in ragged pants. "Feel so good. I could fuck your mouth all night."
His words make you shiver. He could. He could do anything he wanted with you, and you'd let him.
You move your head down, taking him as far as you can, and Rex's eyes open to watch you. You hold his gaze as his cock slides along the back of your tongue and hits the back of your throat, and you suppress the urge to gag.
"So pretty," he hums, his voice strained. "Such a good girl."
Your pussy throbs at the words, and the moan you release vibrates his length.
"That's it," he gasps.
You can feel the tears pooling at the corners of your eyes, but you keep moving, keep taking him, and his grip on your hair tightens.
"So good, mesh'la, so, so good."
He's repeating the words, and you're not sure if he knows he's saying them. Your jaw is starting to ache, your lips are sore, and there's drool dripping down your chin, but you can't stop the soft whimpers and moans.
The sounds are enough to drive him mad.
His hand moves to cup your cheek, and his thumb runs along your bottom lip, stretched around him. The gesture is so tender and loving, it's almost too much.
"Look at you," he breathes. "Kriff, I've wanted this for so long. So beautiful. So perfect. My perfect girl. You take me so well."
You hum again, and his head falls back, the movement pushing his cock deeper. You gag around him, and his hips stutter, a litany of Mando'a spilling from his lips. You're not sure what he's saying, but the words are making your cunt clench, the pleasure building inside of you overwhelming.
"I'm close, mesh'la," he gasps. "If you want to stop, you'd better— ah, kriff!"
You've pulled back, and the suction of your lips is incredible. Rex's hips are stuttering, his hands are tugging on your hair, and the sounds falling from his lips are enough to make your core throb.
"Mesh'la, please, I can't—"
His words die in his throat as you reach between his legs and roll his balls in your hand. The action sends him hurtling over the edge, and his hips thrust up one last time, pushing his cock down your throat as he comes.
Your throat works to swallow every drop. It's so much, more than you were expecting, and you struggle not to choke. His grip on your hair is borderline painful, but you don't mind. You can feel his whole body trembling, his breathing labored and his chest heaving.
You release him with a wet pop, and he shudders. You press one last kiss to the underside of his softening length, and he twitches, his body still sensitive.
"You're gonna kill me" he breathes.
"Hopefully not." You wipe your mouth, thumb catching a stray drop of cum and sucking it into your mouth, and you watch as his eyes darken.
He pulls you to him, and you climb back into his lap, his lips on yours. The kiss is slow and lazy, his hands running up and down your back, his body still shuddering from the force of his orgasm.
"Mesh'la," he sighs against your lips, his breath hot and heavy. "So beautiful."
His fingers trail down the side of your neck and between your breasts. They ghost the skin of your stomach and dip underneath the hem of your panties, and you can't help the whimper that escapes.
"Still want me?" You ask.
"Always."
His lips are on your neck, and his fingers find the wetness between your thighs, and you gasp. The noise that falls from his lips is filthy.
"Fuck, cyar'ika," he groans. "You're soaked."
"That's your fault," you manage.
His teeth graze your pulse, and his fingers brush against your clit, making your hips buck.
"Can't help it," you gasp.
You can't stop the cry of pleasure as his thumb presses down. His touch is gentle, almost hesitant, and you're not sure why. You've made it perfectly clear that you want this.
"Rex," you whimper. "Please."
He presses another kiss to your lips, and the hand not between your thighs wraps around your back, holding you steady. He teases your entrance, and your breath catches, and then his fingers are slipping inside.
"Ah, fuck," you hiss.
You're so wet, so slick, and his fingers slide in easily. Just two fingers already feel so thick, and you can feel your walls stretching around him. There's a dull ache, but it feels so good.
"Cyar'ika," he groans. "Fuck, so tight."
His fingers pump in and out slowly, and your head falls onto his shoulder.
"Faster," you gasp. "Please, Rex."
"Shh," he coos. "Patience, mesh'la."
"Please."
"Be a good girl and be patient for me."
You whine, the sound muffled by his shoulder. He's being cruel, teasing you like this. You've already had him once, and now he's drawing it out. "Rex, I need you."
He hums softly, pressing a kiss to your temple. His fingers are still pumping in and out, slowly, agonizingly, and you know he's doing it on purpose.
"I need you," you whimper.
"I'm here," he whispers.
"No, I— ah! I need you inside me."
You can feel his breath catch, and his fingers stutter, and then his lips are at your ear.
"How do you want me, mesh'la?"
"Like this," you breathe. "I want to ride you."
His breath hisses through his teeth, and his fingers speed up. The change in pace is enough to make your head spin, and the noises coming from your mouth are embarrassing. You sound desperate, and you are.
"Fuck, Rex."
"So good," he hums. "Such a good girl."
A third finger slides in beside the other two, and the stretch makes your back arch. You're not sure when he had the chance to slick his fingers with your wetness, but he must have. He's not hurting you, and the feeling is incredible.
"Rex, I'm gonna—"
"Not yet," he cuts you off.
"Please, I need to—"
"You'll wait," he growls, and the command is enough to make your toes curl.
"Please," you beg. "I'll be good, I promise, just—oh!"
Your plea is cut off by a sharp cry of pleasure, and your walls flutter around his fingers, your hips rocking back and forth.
"I said not yet."
"I'm sorry," you gasp, and the words come out strangled. "I couldn't help it, you feel so good."
He hums, his thumb finding your clit, and the stimulation is almost too much. His lips find yours, and his free hand holds you steady as his fingers move inside of you.
You writhe on top of him, your legs shaking, and you can feel the pleasure building in the pit of your stomach, and it's all too much.
"Please," you beg, and you're not even sure what you're asking for.
"What do you need?"
"Please," you gasp.
"Use your words, cyar'ika. What do you need?"
"I need— ah! I need you. I need more. Please."
He's torturing you, you realize. He's doing it on purpose, making you beg, punishing you for how you teased him earlier, and the thought of it makes your cunt throb.
"You've been so good for me, mesh'la. You think you've earned it?"
"Yes," you hiss. "I'll be good. Please, Rex, I'll be a good girl."
He can't say no, not when you're looking at him like that. Not when your lips are parted and your cheeks are flushed, and the look in your eyes is so desperate.
"Okay," he concedes.
You let out a sound of relief, and his fingers are slipping out of you. He brings his fingers to his lips and sucks them into his mouth, and the action is enough to make you groan. You rise off of him, legs trembling, and hurriedly push your panties down and toss them aside.
He looks up at you, and there's awe in his eyes, a reverence, as his hands settle on your hips to guide you back to him. Your hand wraps around his cock, lining him up, and the two of you gasp as his head breaches your entrance.
"Take your time," he whispers. “You don’t have to—fuck!”
You sink down, taking him fully in one smooth motion, and Rex can't stop the low, guttural moan that escapes.
"You said to take my time," you say, and there's a cheeky lilt to your voice. He opens his mouth to argue, but the words die in his throat. "So I took my time."
You can't stop the grin. The look on his face is almost too much. His cheeks are flushed, and his chest is heaving. His lips are swollen from the kisses, his eyes wide and his pupils blown. He looks good like this, you think, and you've never seen him so undone.
"Cyar'ika," he finally manages.
You hum, circling your hips, and his grip on you tightens. Your pace is slow, savoring this feeling unlike anything you've ever experienced. He's bigger than anything you've ever had inside of you before, filling you in ways you didn't even know were possible. You're still adjusting to him, and your movements are slow, but they're steady, and you can't help the soft whimpers and gasps.
Rex is struggling to breathe. Your heat is so warm and so wet, your walls are clenching around him, and the sight of you is almost too much. The way your head is tipped back, your eyes closed and your mouth open, the sounds you’re making, and the way his cock is disappearing inside of you over and over again, it's all so much. He can't believe this is happening.
He leans forward to press a kiss to your throat, his teeth grazing your pulse. You gasp before pushing on his shoulders, and his back hits the mattress. You lean over him, your hands reaching to grasp the headboard, and the new angle makes the both of you exhale. It also makes your breasts hang tantalizingly in his face.
Rex is not one to waste an opportunity.
He leans up and closes his lips around one of your nipples, and the sensation is enough to make your hips buck. Your pace speeds up, and his hands grip your hips tightly, helping to guide you.
"Oh, kriff," you gasp.
He releases your nipple with a pop and moves his attention to the other, and the sound you make is almost enough to make him come right then. He can’t help but shift his hips, moving them up and down in time with your thrusts, and you pull away from him to give him a look of warning.
"Stay still," you order.
"Or what?"
You raise an eyebrow, and Rex shivers. You're not sure what makes him react like that, but it sends a rush of heat straight to your core.
"I'll stop."
His jaw drops, and his eyes widen. "You wouldn't," he says.
"That’s an order, Captain," you say, and his cock twitches inside of you. You can't help the wicked smile. You’re learning a lot about him today.
"You're the worst."
"You love it," you retort.
His hands move to your waist, and he pulls you closer.
"I love you," he breathes.
You can feel yourself clench around him at his words, and he hisses through his teeth.
"Say it again."
"I love you."
Your lips meet his, and his tongue slides into your mouth as his hands roam your body. You can feel his heart beating wildly in his chest, his lips are warm, and his breath is hot, and his body is so close to yours, the feeling is overwhelming.
He's everything.
"I love you," he says again, his voice hoarse.
"I love you, Rex."
"I never thought I'd hear you say that."
"It's true," you gasp.
His hips stutter, and you pull away, giving him a look of warning, and his jaw clenches.
"Sorry, cyar'ika. I couldn't help it."
"I know."
"Let me make it up to you."
"Wh— ah!"
You cry out as his fingers find your clit, and your walls flutter. The movement sends pleasure shooting through you, and your legs shake, the pace of your hips unsteady.
"That's it," he coos. "Come for me."
"Not yet," you gasp. "Need you to— oh, fuck, Rex."
His hips snap up, meeting your thrusts, and the new pace is relentless. He's chasing his own release, and you're right there with him. You can't take it anymore.
"Please, please, I can't—"
"Go ahead," he urges.
You can't stop the cry that tumbles from your lips. You can feel the orgasm building, and your hips are bucking wildly.
"I can't—I can't," you sob.
"Come for me, cyar'ika. Come on my cock."
The words are enough to send you over the edge, and he swallows your cries of pleasure. You're trembling above him, your nails are digging into his skin, and the pressure of his fingers against your clit is enough to make your hips jerk.
"Kriff, I can feel you," he breathes. "Your little pussy is squeezing me so tightly."
"Please," you beg. You're not even sure what you're begging him for.
All you know is that he feels so good, and you're so sensitive, and the sensations are too much and not enough.
"That's it," he murmurs. "Good girl."
"I can't, I can't, I can't-"
"Shh, shh, it's okay."
He's so gentle even as he sets a brutal pace, his hips snapping up to meet yours. You can feel the head of his cock hitting the end of your channel, and his fingers are rubbing frantic circles around your clit.
The pressure is almost painful, but it feels so good.
"Oh, fuck, Rex," you cry out.
"Come again," he demands.
"I can't," you protest. "It's too much."
"You can," he counters. "Do it for me."
The words send a thrill through you, and you can feel the pleasure building. Your walls are fluttering around him, your hips are bucking, and you can't control the noises coming from your lips.
"That's it," he growls.
Your orgasm washes over you, and this time it's stronger, tears spilling over as his name falls from your lips over and over again. You can feel your release gushing out of you, coating his cock and the sheets below.
The sight is so filthy, but it only seems to spur him on. Rex grips your hips tight enough that you know you’ll bruise, and the thought sends another thrill through you. You want him to leave his mark. He fucks up into you with a force that has the headboard slamming against the wall, and his thrusts are losing their rhythm.
"I'm so close," he breathes.
You're barely coherent, but you can't help but latch on, his words sending another rush of heat through you. "You gonna come for me, Captain?"
He shudders, and his eyes flutter shut, his mouth opening and closing soundlessly. He can't find the words.
"You've been so good for me," you purr breathlessly. "Let go."
You can see the tension leaving his shoulders, his jaw slack. His breath is coming in shallow gasps, and his thrusts are unsteady. He's teetering on the edge, and all it takes is a few more words from you.
"Fill me up."
"Cyar'ika," he warns.
"Do it," you order.
"Fuck, cyar'ika," he breathes. "Oh, fuck, I'm coming, I'm—"
He curses, his head falling back against the pillow, and his cock pulses as he spills inside of you, his hands tight on your hips to hold you down. You can feel the warmth of his seed filling you, and the sensation is enough to make the corners of your vision darken.
"I can feel it," you murmur. "I can feel you, kriff, Rex."
He groans, his arms pulling you down, and you collapse against his chest. You're not sure how long you stay like that, just holding each other. You can't feel anything except him, his hands running up and down your spine, and his lips pressed to the top of your head.
“So,” you say after a while, and he can hear the smugness in your voice.
You tilt your head, and the look he gives you is withering.
"Don't start," he warns.
"Captain, huh? I didn't know that was your thing"
"That's not—"
"What? You don't want to talk about the fact that your cock gets hard when I call you Captain?"
On cue, the appendage in question twitches, and Rex closes his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. "It's not— ugh, kriff," he mutters.
You can't stop the laughter that bubbles up.
"You're cute when you're embarrassed," you coo.
"Don't patronize me," he says, but the words have no heat behind them.
"I'd never dream of it, sir."
You can see the blush rising in his cheeks, and his eyes darken.
"That's an order," he grumbles.
You lean up, brushing your lips against his, and the touch is soft and gentle. He melts into it, his hands resting on your waist.
"Yes, Captain," you say.
"I can't—kriff. You can't say things like that, mesh'la." His expression is pained, and the sound that escapes him is almost a whine.
"You're right," you agree. "I can do better."
He raises an eyebrow, and his jaw drops as your fingers wrap around his wrist. His eyes follow the motion as you pull his hand between your thighs. You let out a satisfied moan as his fingers dip between your folds, and he can't tear his gaze away from the sight of his seed dripping from your cunt when his softening cock slides out of you.
"You're a mess," he says reverently.
"I'm a mess because of you."
He hums, his fingers gathering some of his spend and sliding it back into you.
"Is this what you were imagining, Captain?"
He shudders at the title, and his hips cant, his cock stirring to life.
You can't help the grin. "It is, isn't it?"
"You're terrible," he growls.
"Oh, I'm not terrible. I'm the best you've ever had."
He lets out a breathless laugh. "You're the only one I've ever had," he admits.
You pull back, staring at him in surprise, and the look on his face is unreadable.
"Are you— are you serious?"
"Of course I'm serious," he says, brow raised.
"But--"
"Cyare, I've only ever wanted you." His words are simple, and they're said with a conviction that steals the breath from your lungs.
"Oh."
You're speechless. You're not sure what you'd imagined the past few months. You're not even sure if you'd ever given much thought to it, but the idea that you're the only person who has ever made him feel like this is dizzying.
"I've loved you for a very long time," he confesses, and the words make your heart ache. "I never thought—kriff, I never thought you'd feel the same."
"I love you," you say firmly. "So much."
He grins, and the smile is so wide that his cheeks are dimpling. You can't resist. You lean down to kiss him again, and the way he holds you, like you're the most precious thing in the world, makes the feeling in your chest bloom.
"I'll say it every day for the rest of our lives, if that's what you need," you say.
"Don't make promises you can't keep," he murmurs.
"I wouldn't," you promise.
He stares at you for a moment, his gaze intense, and his grip tightens. You can see him steeling himself, and the words he speaks make you shiver.
"Good, because I intend to marry you someday."
"Someday," you echo. You're not sure if you believe him, if that's even possible for you, but you believe that he believes it.
"When the war is over," he confirms. "When the fighting is done, and we've finally got a chance at peace, I'll give you the galaxy, cyare. And a family, if you want one."
"Rex, I—" You swallow thickly, and he can see the emotions flickering across your face. His fingers are drawing shapes on your hip, and his eyes are locked with yours.
"I'm not asking for an answer now," he says gently. "I just— I want you to know how serious I am."
You nod, and the silence that stretches between you is heavy.
"You really mean it," you finally say.
"Of course I do."
"What happens if—"
"There is no 'if.'" His tone leaves no room for argument, and he shifts, sitting up. The new position brings you into his lap, and your knees are straddling his waist. He rests his forehead against yours, and his breath fans across your face.
"Whatever happens, we'll face it together."
"Together," you murmur.
"I'm with you. Always."
You close the distance, kissing him softly. It's nice, holding him like this. The feeling of his arms around you is enough to drive the fears from your mind, pushing them to the furthest corners. You can feel yourself relaxing, the tension leaving your shoulders, and his hands roam your body, exploring every inch.
"You know," you begin, your voice quiet, and your lips brush against his with every word. "I'm still waiting for a tour of the barracks, Captain. Oh, the hangar too."
His breath hitches, and you can feel him starting to harden again under you.
"Cyare," he breathes.
"I'd love to see your office," you continue, and his eyes darken. "You can give me a private tour, just the two of us. I'll wear a skirt, and you can bend me over your desk."
His cock is fully erect now, and he can't stop the groan.
"And the showers," you purr, gently rotating your hips. "I bet they're big. Just big enough for the two of us. We could get the water nice and hot, and I could drop to my knees..."
"Kriff," he swears.
"Or…"
He's breathing heavily, his fingers digging into your skin.
"We could do that now," you offer.
"Cyare." His tone is pleading, and the sound sends a thrill through you. You can feel the ache building between your legs, and your thighs are sticky.
"I'm already dripping wet," you whisper.
"That's it."
He moves so fast that it makes you yelp, and the next thing you know, he's on his feet, carrying you, and your legs are wrapped around his waist. He walks swiftly towards the 'fresher, and the feeling of him sliding against your core makes you shudder.
"You're going to be the death of me, cyare," he murmurs.
"Maybe," you concede. "But I think we can agree that it'll be a great way to go."
The door slides shut behind him, and the sound of his laughter is enough to make you melt.
"A great way to go," he echoes.
You know the path ahead of you is treacherous. You know there will be more battles, and more losses, and more nights where you're unable to sleep. You know there will be pain, and fear, and sorrow.
But there will be hope too, and joy, and happiness. A home, and a family, and a future.
It will be worth it.
542 notes · View notes
lilacgaby · 26 days ago
Text
‧₊˚ to kiss or kill.. a vampire?‧₊˚
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you've been a vampire for as long as you can remember. you were going through your day, or night, routine as normal when a noise startles you. a man, katsuki bakugo to be exact, was standing at your door. though, he can't seem to remember whether he's supposed to kill or kiss you...
★pair. knight(?)katsuki x vampire!reader. tags. fem!reader, fantasy!au, vampire!au, amnesia trope, memories, kissing, hugging, dates kinda, blood, daggers, stakes. wc. 2k.
noteღ. i love the memory loss trope but its hard to write it in a way that doesn't seem like lazy(???) idk how to say it, also happy halloween to all who celebrate!
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embedded deep in the forest, vines growing over the bark of the trees, the sun not visible from the impressive manor you called home.
a lake so deep you couldn't see the bottom, the moonlight the only thing reflecting off the darkness of the water.
it was quiet, quaint. only the animals as company for such a faraway place.
you roamed freely around your garden, tending to the black rose bushes and cutting the thorns to an appropriate length. feeding carrots you only grew for the deer and bunnies that had grown used to your presence, seeing the generations of them rest and birth, a consequence of being immortal.
your outfit was dark, camouflaging you against the night sky, the only time you were able to go out. you'd grown used to it, comforted by the night sky and sleeping critters around you.
but a crunch of grass snapped you out of your relaxation. the tuft of blond hair you'd spotted alarming you.
your pot of water was now splashed onto the floor, your red eyes were widened and pupils like a cat as you moved out of vision. vision of whoever was trampling into your long uncivilized manor.
it was a man, donning expensive yet ripped up fabrics and cloths, a beaten up satchel, and bright hair that stood out against the night sky.
you couldn't help but notice though, that he had red eyes just like yours.
he must be a vampire, you reasoned, moving closer to investigate the man who was unmoving at your door. you popped out from behind him. “who are you and why are you here?”
he jumped, seemingly not expecting you to be behind him. “i'm.. lost. i can't seem to find my way. or.. remember what i was doing here.” he turned to face you, his figure towering over yours, his eyes on you. “you don't remember anything? is it possible that you've been hit with a strong spell?”
you kept talking while looking over at his complete attire now, noting the royal emblem on his chest.
“it's possible.. i don't remember what i do exactly.” his red eyes kept boring into you, striking you with a sense of familiarity, though you couldn't place from where. “well, you can stay here for the night. i have spare rooms.”
his eyes widened slightly, his eyebrows raising. “really, you're inviting me in? what if i was a vampire?”
“well, no need to fear one of my own.”
his mouth went agape when he realized. “you're a vampire.”
“yes. does that change anything?”
“i.. guess not.” a hand went to the back of his neck, his eyes averting as he looked up in thought. “it's just surprising. i think.. i feel a connection to the word. to its meaning. i must have been- sorry be- a vampire. don't you agree?”
“let's talk more inside. if you are a vampire as you believe, we'll die if we're outside another hour...” you left it open ended as to ask for his name.
“katsuki. call me katsuki.”
“well katsuki. welcome in, don't suck my blood or something.” you joked.
as he followed you inside, he awed internally at the extravagance of your mansion. it definitely was the home of a vampire, as all the windows were closed and barricaded.
“i haven't had many guests over for a while.. so. excuse the mess.” he followed you as you showed him the different parts of your home. he passed by the kitchen, so gorgeous that he felt upset when you noted how you only used it to make food for the animals outside. you showed him your bedroom, which only housed a single, heavily padded coffin.
you went upstairs finally, your mansion was huge so he began to notice the ache in his feet. when you arrived in your lounge area though, he felt a pang in his head as he eyed a dagger. a silver one.
memories flooded into his head at once, making him hold his head in discomfort.
words. so many replayed in his mind though they were incoherent. sights of blood, of one of those very daggers in his hand, a stake in the other.
“ėřīdɯǎʌ ħ ʇ ľļ ʞ”
he couldn't understand it at all, the visions in his mind were playing and flashing right after another.
training, studying vitals, the word vampire. why did it seem so familiar?
“katsuki. are you okay?” your hands were on his shoulders now, your face of concern went unnoticed by him, his eyes were only laser focused on the sharp fangs of your mouth.
“i–. i– um. i don't know what the fuck happened to me.” he admitted, he still felt weak from the confusion revelations that had unfolded in his mind.
“maybe.. you should head to bed for the day. i have a bed for you in here.”
you took his hand, he almost pulled away, he didn't know why it still felt so bloody. why it felt like he was holding an unseen weapon in his palm. but he let you comfort him slightly anyways.
you laid a towel onto his forehead, closing the door with a, “goodnight.”
you left him resting with his thoughts as you continued your chores outside.
it was obvious he wasn't a vampire like he thought. he wasn't nocturnal like you. the sight of the blood bags you had left cooling in a safe him feel queasy, and he could touch metal just fine. he found himself tracing the details of the dagger in your living room mindlessly, enthralled with it. it felt just as familiar as your eyes did. he was sure it would feel just as right in his hand, he moved to pick it up when-
“what are you doing?” you asked sleepily. your attire from yesterday was gone, replaced with casual clothes that didn't seem to fit you. “..i just got curious.”
he stared at you. the crimson of his eyes confusing you to no end, but you let it go with a sigh. “well, stop messing with that stuff. like seriously.”
he took your warning. but the strange memories never went away. though, he noticed that they'd only really pop up around you.
he'd gotten to know you in the couple hours of the first day he spent with you. your favorite color, food before you turned, your true age, your favorite flower.
and you'd gotten to know the vague things he remembered about himself in exchange. how he grew up in a village, how he remembers training hard everyday to become a knight, how he grew up with the next in line for the throne.
you'd traveled around the forest with him, showing him some of your favorite spots. pointing to nearby towns and taverns, warning him to stay away from spots where werewolves would roam frequently.
you'd gotten him a new wardrobe of clothing that happened to match yours. black button downs and slacks with red accents, something that suited him perfectly, was what you had gifted him.
he tried to gift you things as well. it was unfortunate that his gift for cuisine went wasted on you, who couldn't eat food. he picked you flowers from different regions of the forest you wouldn't venture to. dandelions that he insisted you'd blow out together, red roses that paired perfectly with your black ones, and baby’s breath sprinkled tastefully in between.
the words grew less scrambled over the days of which he spent with you. it'd been a month of living with him at this point, and your life together had become routine. the pangs where he'd keel over for seconds in real time, but hours in his mind happened more frequently too. the same visions of blood on his hands, a dagger identical to the one displayed in your home would always be there. but additions of a torch in his hand and a dagger would change. the memory would change, which confused him.
he'd be lying if he said he didn't like the calm nature of your life together. the tranquil feeling of feeding the bunnies and deers alongside you, the rushing sound of the lake as you sat side by side admiring it.
the feeling of your skin, cold to the touch, on his body that seemed to run too hot.
your open-minded nature, the lingering loss of your presence he'd feel when you were gone.
though, he now could hear some parts of the sentence quite clearly.
“k– the vampire.”
as he laid around on one of the many couches of your manor, petting a black cat, he pondered on what the last word could be. he knew it could only be one of two words, he wasn't dumb.
to kiss or to kill. but what reason was he given to kill you? you'd been nothing but amazing to him, welcome and open when he was vulnerable. the only thing you'd been strange about– the only thing he felt he wanted.
was to hold the dagger in his hand.
he laid the cat onto the side of the couch before standing up. it was like an invisible force was leading him away, taking him right to his object of interest that he had been so hyper aware of since the day he arrived.
every step he took was like a piece of the puzzle being put into place.
he was hit by a memory loss potion while he was out on patrol.
patrol for the kingdom, where he served as a knight. however, after many vampire hunters had gone missing in this part of the forest..
he had been sent out here.
he opened his satchel that he'd thrown into the corner. affirming his thoughts, a dagger, identical to the one on the stand was in it.
next to it was a stake, and a torch with an ignition next to that.
he stood up, the final words given to him. but it didn't feel as good as he thought it would.
“kill the vampire.”
because the order was to hurt someone who'd grown so dear to him.
was it wrong for him to continue acting like nothing was wrong? maybe. but he couldn't help but still continue to be enamored by you, even if it was wrong.
the stereotypes, the horror stories he'd been fed of vampires. as he held you close to him in the comfort of your coffin, he didn't know what to do anymore.
as he guided you to the lake, he wasn't sure of what he would do. he had his satchel with him now, yet he still held your hand in his.
“are you leaving?” you asked, unknowing of the war taking place in his mind.
“no. i just, wanted to bring it along.”
“oh. okay.” you'd shrugged, unfazed by his words. he felt his heart bleed, bleed because you trusted him so much, but also tugged towards his sense of duty.
you'd sat together again, his body facing the same lake that had guided him to you. he felt your gaze on his face, he squeezed his palm into a fist.
“what's wrong?” you asked, your voice low, you held the long sleeves of your black outfit as your eyebrows scrunched in concern. “you've been acting weird.”
“i.. my memory. it came back.”
your eyes shot up, before a small smile came over your face. “really, that's great katsuki. so,
what were you doing out here?”
the words lingered in the air, his eye painstakingly moving to look at you. his mouth was held open for a second, seemingly speechless as he tried to tell you. he finally, just let it slip. “i was supposed to kill you, [name].”
you stilled, he continued to explain. “it all happened once i saw the dagger. it eyed me, and i eyed it. it seemed so familiar, your eyes did too. until it all came back.” he took a sharp breath and continued.
“men, vampire hunters of the kingdom specifically, went missing around these parts. i was sent here to find the vampire and kill them. but i was ambushed along the way by a witch who hit me with a spell.” his hand moved to his satchel, you stayed unmoving as you absorbed his words.
he held the stake and dagger in his hands respectively, the materials that would kill you if pierced glistening ominously in the moonlight. the same moonlight that encapsulated you two.
“i thought it over. a lot. thought about what i wanted, no. what i thought was right.” he gripped them tightly, holding them up.
you closed your eyes, as you heard the words, “goodbye.”
but death, the feeling of wood piercing your heart never came. the splash of the water was the only sound heart by you, who had tearfully looked to face him.
“what?” was all you could helplessly utter, as he kneeled to sit in front of you:
“..i don't want to kill you [name].” he moved to hold your hand, cold as ever, against the beating heart of his chest. “but i'd like to kiss you, honestly.”
you let out a shaky laugh, a tear falling down your face as you sighed in relief. “i think i'd like that too.”
as the last bubbles burst at the surface of the lake, he tilted your head forward, holding your chin in between his fingertips as he gently kissed you. only the grass between your bodies bore witness to the newly born relationship forged by trust ignited.
the full moon now faced you two. he held your hand tightly, encaging you with the broad of his body.
he saw the moon start to slip away and picked you up, taking you to the bedroom you'd gifted him and laying you by his side.
he'd turned practically nocturnal too from these past weeks, the desire to be by your side fueling him.
so as he laid with his eyes half lidded, looking at you in the dim candlelight of the room, he held you impossibly closer.
he wanted to spend an eternity with you. maybe he'd truly cast his old life aside and become a vampire alongside you.
that thought rocked him to sleep that night, your body like a puzzle piece next to his.
who knew all you'd have to do to kiss a vampire is cast your old life aside?
tags. @k0z3me @darhinadadragon @maddietries @exoticrasin @lavendarstarz @hisonlyobsession @i-the-fluffo @uy242c @cookielovesbook-akie @frosted-flakes @irenne-stans @kemziicore
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