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#you've basically failed
cactustreesmotel · 10 months
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well i finally hit the "crying over uni" state of being (and on the last day of classes too! what an achievement!)
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bitternace · 7 months
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WHY ARE YOU SO EVIL!!! /POS. ATTACKING YOU.
Xemnas and Xigbar for 37 if that number hasn't been done? If it has, how about 74?
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no puedo pedirle lo eterno a un simple mortal // ay, todo lo que he hecho por ti.
[ID: a mostly black and white drawing with a purple overlay of xigbar and xemnas shown from the hip up on the left side of the image. the background is black and has some diagonal lines with a bit of transparency on the right side. the shadows are harsh, with only a bit of light falling on their faces.
they stand before each other turned to the audience. xigbar, holds the handle and the middle of No Name before him, head tilted down as he looks to the audience. xemnas stands a full head taller behind xigbar, his left hand held some distance below the bladed tip of No Name, his left eye is covered by his fringe.
xemnas visible eye is painted ochre with a white pupil, while xigbar's eye is white and gold. The eyes on no name's handle and the gazing eye on the blade are a vibrant cyan. the caption reads the spanish lyrics "i can't ask a simple mortal for a forever" and "oh, everything i've done for you." /End ID.]
close-up under keep reading.
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#capisnotonfire#PUTS MY HAND TO MY STERNUM AND FALLS TO THE FLOOR ON MY KNEES /affectionate#warning to whoever might open the link; there's a slightly suggestive several 'ay's at the beginning porque shakira it's also bass heavy#OBJECTIVELY THE FUNNIEST SONG THAT COULD'VE COME UP. it's the gift that keeps on giving!!#this specific remix's been on my top list... several years; top five for a couple. i've loved it forever. top radio edits ever.#it's basically about a guy that makes up excuses to hide he's cheating and a gal that's fed up with his bullshit and is like. okay. bye.#i briefly considered going with............ right now i know my heart is yours <- in regards to i'm already half-xehanort#as per usual not ship art but it would be HILARIOUS if it was. it would've been able to go so many incredibly funny tragic ways#nano does reqs#my doods#xigbar kh#xemnas kh#IT TOOK SO LONG. putting this out there because i WILL lose my marbles if i do anything more. it's not as polished as it could.#fret not if you've asked for a req i am still doing 'em this one just. kicked my ass (been busy). i tried a couple of things and failed#THEN the file corrupted like 9 hours in and i wanted to die a little (thank the heavens my drawing app has a#thing to get back corrupted files through their screen recording) but i GIVE UP (affectionate)#Does this make sense thematically? Fuck if i know. i forgot all lore (half serious). it looked cooler in my head (jesting)#anyways. mwah tysm for the ask<3#i love posting at mystifying times (i finish at terrible hours and get excited)#described#74
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batsplat · 2 months
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so in assen 2004 comms talk about how valentino helped melandri with riding yamaha A Lot, and how they are two great friends. and indeed those two have known each other since childhood/or at least their teens right? (seen a lot of their photos w matching terrible dye jobs) but then fast forward to 2010 and melandri is going full conspiracy theorist about the freaking chair affghhhkgjk. like what happened here? is it any interesting or is it like mostly one sided bitterness from melandri or something. like that can’t really be about 2005 season for vale bc come on melandri wasn’t his main rival that year.
even if it’s not interesting feud or drama wise it is another friendship that vale had (and unlike w sete vale&melandri go way back) that eventually fell apart as a result of competing in motogp…….hm
yeah, we don't actually have a great sense of what happened there! it's funny the coldness seems to have crept in during the 2005 season specifically, because I'm very much with you here on the 'come on valentino why bother' stance - melandri was aggressively not a proper title contender that season and really not even the main on-track rival... but actually I do think this fits in rather nicely within my sete thesis, which we'll get to. the subsequent public bitterness has been entirely one-sided, with melandri occasionally saying something kinda mean-spirited about valentino in recent years and valentino... not doing any of that
anyhow, they definitely WERE close, which was hammered home not just through repeated mentions by the commentators but also when you read the columns he was dictating every race for mat oxley in his early years. here, from his 250cc days:
mugello 1998
I wasn’t so confident before Mugello because while I was at home I played football and lost, I played tennis and lost, I rode motocross and lost. The only thing I won was minicars – I am the champion! We got beaten in a five-a-side soccer match, six-one, then a friend beat me at tennis, six-one, then Marco [Melandri] beat me at motocross. I’m always fighting with Marco on motocross but he’s faster than me. I’m getting better though – at the start of the year he’d beat me by five or six seconds, now it’s only one or two. I have much fear when I ride motocross because I’m not good at flying. We don’t go crazy; it would be stupid to get hurt doing that. Motocross is great for my muscle power though. I don’t go the gym much in the summer because I want to be outside, so motocross is perfect.
paul ricard 1998
As usual, my break between Mugello and France was full of battles with my friends! First we played football and my team won on penalties. I scored the winner. I never make a mistake from the penalty spot. Next day I did motocross with Melandri and he beat me, as usual, but we had some very funny races. Then I raced with Melandri again, but with electric cars. He’s bought a Honda NSX – it’s fast. Before I left for France we raced minimoto at a track in Rimini. There were about 20 of us: me, Melandri and a load of fast, young Italian riders. We had a lot of really crazy battles. Lots of fun! I don’t think it’s dangerous because the bikes aren’t so fast, maybe 60kp/h. I had some big fights with Melandri, we hit each other all the time – BANG! BANG! BANG! – and we crashed together maybe two or three times.
madrid 1998
I’m doing motocross three times a week now to help build up strength, but Melandri is still faster than me, so I’ve started practising in secret. I get dressed into my motocross gear, then ring him to tell him we don’t need to ride today, then do a few hours riding in secret! Soon I will be faster than him! Anyway, I beat him in minimoto before we went to Jarama.
assen 1998
“Hooray, finally I am first on a 250! It was the day of the teenager at Assen, the Italian teenager! I was so happy when my friend Melandri won the 125 race, so it was fantastic to go out and win the 250. A perfect day, except Marco and me couldn’t party on Saturday night, because I flew home to celebrate with my friends, while he stayed at Assen. I guess we’ll make sure we have a beer together before Donington.
donington 1998
We had our own paddock World Cup at Donington on Thursday, which was really shit, because we played three games and lost three games. I played in the Italian team with Melandri, Boscoscuro, Scalvini, Locatelli, Borsoi and Carpani. First we played the Suzuki 500 team and lost, then we played Team Rainey and lost, and finally we played Dorna, and lost. Dorna were all Spanish and very good. But the games weren’t so much fun because the pitch was tiny and really bumpy. Last year we had the paddock World Cup at Imola on a full-size pitch, and I scored twice. Nice!
sachsenring 1998
Now we have a four-week holiday before Brno, but I’m going to spend most of my time on the beach near my home – it’s sunny and the girls are nice, that’s all I need! But I am going away for one week – a racers’ holiday with Loris Reggiani, Roberto Locatelli and Melandri. We’re going to Tunisia to mess about with jet skis and fast boats. Should be a lot of fun!
sepang 1999
The winter was fun. Usually I don’t like the winter because it’s too cold, but where I live, near the Adriatic coast, there are so many people in the summer. That didn’t used to be a problem, but now everyone recognises me, so it’s Rossi! Rossi! Rossi! all the time. I don’t like it! I spent a lot of time with my friends, as that’s when I’m happiest. We went skiing a few times, a big gang of us. Mad! Snowboarding is more fashionable nowadays but I’m faster on skis, so it’s better! Melandri came with me once, he’s my best mate in the paddock, plus Alessandro Brannetti, a new Italian 125 guy.
mugello 1999
Before Mugello I spent some time at home, riding my 250 road bike and going motocrossing. I have a new motocross bike at home, but I can’t tell you what it is, because it’s not an Aprilia! But it’s a lot of fun on the new motocross track I’ve built behind a friend’s house. I dug the ground myself with a JCB digger we hired. I have designed the track to be safe for me, because modern motocross tracks have near-vertical take-off jumps, which are very dangerous if you don’t have good control in the air. And I don’t! So I’ve built low and fast jumps which I can take in fourth or fifth gear and be safe. Big fun! I’m looking forward to racing my friend Melandri, who hasn’t been doing motocross since he broke his wrist in Malaysia.
sachsenring 1999
Now we have a four-week holiday, hooray! All I really want to do is sleep. During the break last year I went to Tunisia with a bunch of friends like Melandri, but all I want to do now is stay home and rest. My home is near a holiday resort anyway, near the Adriatic Sea, but to be honest I don’t like the sea so much. I prefer snow...”
argentina 1999
I already have some plans for the winter. The World Championship may have finished, but I already have two more races over the next few weeks. No rest yet! First is the X Race at Misano. This is a special event for GP and world Superbike riders. I’m racing go-karts, motocross and cars with [Carl] Fogarty, Melandri, Capirossi, Harada and a lot of other guys. They ran this event for the first time last year and I won it. It’s only fun of course but I want to win again because winning is always important. Then at the end of November I’m doing a car rally at Monza.
so yeah, clearly close buddies! I'm sure there's more out there about their friendship, but I've never been that invested in digging into the details lol. about the collapse of the relationship... well, there's this from the barker biography, which kinda lumps melandri into a generic section about valentino's rivals:
Marco Melandri, who had been a close friend of Rossi's for years before he started winning races in 2005, noted the same shift in attitude: 'When I started to race well with him he changed a lot. When we were growing up we were very good friends. Valentino plays games with everybody... the way he talked to the media - he tries to never say something good about you.'
in 2007, after valentino had finally lost a title fight (and was in the process of losing another), there's another oxley column where a few key figures like his teammate edwards, his rival hayden, and his crew chief jb were asked about what made valentino so good. and valentino's crew chief jb was kind enough to give his own take on the melandri dynamic:
“He only uses mind games when people make a serious challenge, then he pulls out that extra tool in his armoury, which he did with Max, with Sete and to a lesser degree with Marco. Then there’s Loris, who is also serious challenge, but there’s a different understanding between them, there’s a respect. When I first worked with Valentino he was mates with Marco. Whenever there was a dinner or a party, Marco was always there. When Marco came to MotoGP it was still fine, then when there was any sort of a challenge their friendship cooled off a bit."
and then by 2010 you get melandri be like. full yellow chair conspiracy theorist. now, he also mentions how his own celebrations were received, and we do actually have jorge himself give his review of said celebrations a few years earlier (x, x):
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I don't really have a point here, I just think it's funny
whereas from valentino's side.... well, there's really not much. his autobiography goes until the end of 2004 and is published in 2005 - so if melandri was already a 'proper' rival when the book was finalised, it will have been a very recent thing... but there's literally one reference to melandri in the whole thing, and it's something generic to do with the yamaha's development. valentino himself has said pretty much fuck all about this friendship falling apart. it's a bit frustrating because... when melandri says that valentino tries never to say anything good about you in the media - look, that's probably referring to something substantive, but we don't really know what exactly valentino supposedly said. we just have to take melandri at his word.... when you go that far back, it's a lot trickier to hunt down specifics if it's not a big news story, if there's not been a major controversy
you do have this from mid 2005:
"No. I think this is not true," replied Rossi, when asked if he deliberately avoided friendships with his closest rivals. "With Melandri, when this year he start to go fast, especially the Italian journalists, try to put some bad things between us - to make fight like what happened between Biaggi and Doohan. "But I go to speak to Melandri after Shanghai, on the podium, because I say one thing and the Italian journalists they modify and say to him another thing - and also the same journalists come to me and make the same. "I know Marco from minibikes when we were friends - we've been friends for more than ten-years - so I try to keep a good relationship because I don't like a bad relationship with anybody," he insisted. "For sure I have had a bad relationship with Biaggi and Gibernau but I don't think that is the right result."
now, according to the article, there were already rumours at the time that the relationship had grown colder that year. which is mainly funny insofar as valentino had quite literally double melandri's points - and the latter still hadn't won a race. again. what's the point
which, well. I do think jb's mention of capirossi is kinda interesting, as another rival valentino had known forever and one who wasn't like. dramatically less likely than melandri to end up a serious challenger to valentino, beyond being a bit older already. jb mentions they have an "understanding", a "respect" between the two of them... it's also maybe worth bringing in what hayden, the man who had actually managed to beat him in 2006, had to say about valentino for the same oxley piece:
“I can’t say it’s just his approach that makes him good. Some guys take their racing real serious, others are really laid back, it’s whatever works for that rider. But regardless of whatever he does he definitely gets around the track fast, that’s what’s most important. “One thing I noticed when we were team-mates is that he looks like it’s fun, fun, fun, he definitely cuts up a lot, but once you’re in the garage that dude is so serious, so focused. Everything seems perfect, right down to the windscreen sticker and the colour of his boots. He doesn’t overlook anything and I think that’s a big part of it. “More than anything it’s the racer in him that makes him so strong, it’s obvious the guy wants to win. He’s got a lot of natural talent but I know a lot of guys with natural talent and it gets some guys in trouble. It’s the whole package that makes him strong: the desire, the focus, the talent. “I think sometimes maybe he’s not as laidback as he comes across. He knows what to say and when to say it to make it look like things aren’t really getting to him. He knows how to play it, on the bike and off the bike. “It’s hard to say what he’s like with mind games because I can only comment on how he’s been with me and I’ve never seen him play any games with me, especially last year when he was taking chunks out of my points lead. The guy didn’t really change, maybe he just knew that I wasn’t going to roll over. Maybe some of the guys he can break down mentally, maybe he knew it wasn’t going to get to me. “Him and JB (Jeremy Burgess) haven’t won all those titles just through his riding, they know how to play people, they know how to play their cards, when to show their hand, when not to show their hand. I don’t think he plays as many games as other guys – you don’t need to play a lot of games when you can ride like that.“ "On track sure he’s aggressive but he’s totally clean and he definitely has a lot of tactics. He knows when he wants to race just one guy, how to separate groups, how to slow down. Like Phillip Island in 2005 I was on him the whole race and he eventually saw that he wasn’t going to get away, so he slowed down, brought the next group up to us to get me caught up with them, then tried to make another break. He’s got a lot of race craft. “I’d say his biggest strength is that he can adapt. If the tyres go off and he needs to slide he can slide, when the bike need to be ridden in line he can ride in line, he can definitely adapt to situations. I can’t say there’s one area of his riding where he just kills guys. It’s not just braking or corner speed or this or that, I’d just say that when he’s in a rhythm and putting those laps down he can break a guy. Like at Jerez this year he broke Pedrosa by about half a tenth a lap, he just kept putting those laps down, riding on that edge. He doesn’t ride 95 per cent, he rides on that razor edge for a long time. “I don’t know about weaknesses, it’s hard for me to point out a guy’s weakness when he’s won all those championships. In fact I’m not going to say he’s got any weak points because I don’t need to motivate the guy! That’s why I don’t want to say anything negative, I’m a big believer in not motivating these guys anymore, that’s why I don’t talk trash.”
like, you do have to bring up the context that valentino had four title rivals in 2006 - melandri, hayden, capirossi and dani - and he really only seems to have cooled off towards one of them. I'm not saying it's melandri's fault! I think it's more... hm, it's a bit telling, isn't it? competitively, there's not really any reason for melandri to be singled out in any way. I mean, you'll note he didn't win the title - and the guy who did explicitly says he didn't think valentino was fucking with him. valentino says in 2005 that he's made an active effort to not let the melandri relationship get worse... which could be true insofar as he didn't want any drama, but clearly he did allow that friendship to grow cold. why do that? is melandri really such a threat? I feel like if valentino said something particularly egregious about melandri, we would have some kind of a record of it - but let's say he was just mildly bitchy about the guy. you'd want to take him to one side and tell him 'dude, you really needn't bother', right? like, no offence, but is THIS guy worth it?
except. well. it is a little interesting that in the immediate aftermath of 2004, valentino had another friend of his (who he had considerably more history with than his last title rival) head over to honda gresini, turn into a more serious challenger... and valentino went. 'hm, yeah, maybe let's not do that again.' whether consciously or subconsciously, he does seem to have drawn back from melandri a hell of a lot quicker than he did from sete - and let's not forget that sete was actually beating him in dramatic last lap duels, which melandri extremely did not do. now, look, of course there COULD have been some sort of private spat here that nobody involved ever talked about... or maybe valentino just decided for completely unrelated reasons he'd had enough of melandri. but isn't it just. a little noteworthy. that when it comes to the 2006 title rivals, valentino is on good terms with all of them, who he seemingly does not piss off too badly with any sort of off-track antics... except melandri. his coldest relationship is with his childhood friend. one might conclude that melandri was the one who had the most power to hurt valentino, if he had been allowed to remain close. one could argue that there the sete rivalry marked a bit of a turning point in terms of how valentino approached his rivalries, that after this point he really didn't want another rivalry that could affect him in the same way. one might point out that some of the details of the melandri rivalry sure feel like they could be used to back up this framing
all that being said. what valentino is doing here is... well, it's basically fine, isn't it. everyone and their dog agrees it's tough to remain friends with your actual close rivals. jb describes it as their friendship 'cooling off', which is also the kind of thing that can just... eventually happen with childhood friends, even when you don't have pressures of competition warping interpersonal dynamics. there's not all that much to suggest valentino was massively treating melandri differently from any of his other major rivals at the time - it's just that his prior relationship had been closer and melandri seems to have taken the shift poorly. given how little of a paper trail there is, it feels like any mind games on valentino's part were generally on the subtler side, perhaps just the occasional snide comment or insinuation or ambiguously shady line that never made it to an article we can still access nowadays. more in line with what nicky "I don't think he plays as many games as other guys" hayden is describing: how valentino knows how to play his cards without necessarily escalating it into full out war. when melandri's talking about the rivalry, at times he does seem less annoyed by anything valentino actually did than he is by the media pressure of being an italian rival of valentino's, of being subjected to a more hostile media environment tan valentino, etc etc. after a certain point, valentino was often a passive beneficiary of his own successes in that regard. it's not like he's telling the italian journalists to put extra pressure on melandri... but he's also hardly going to complain
in general, the timing of it does have a certain charm to it as useful evidence for my great big 'the sete experience changed how valentino approached his rivalries' thesis, but I'm always a tad wary of analyses that flatten valentino's rivalries and by extension valentino by treating the patterns of behaviour in each as identical. it's also worth pointing out that... well, melandri isn't exactly a neutral source here, and his 2010 great big yellow chair theory does maybe suggest his resentment was getting in the way of his judgement where valentino was concerned. in the end, people didn't enjoy melandri's celebrations as much as melandri would have liked. and at some point in 2005, valentino apparently decided he didn't like this guy's vibe any more. c'est la vie
#trying to find a diplomatic way of saying I never exactly got the impression melandri was the sharpest tool in the shed#and I failed which is why I'm putting it in the tags#idt jorge has ever managed to say anything as quietly devastating as the lines “but he never managed to make it as funny”#and “but the chair was green”. like it's so understated so un-jorge but he randomly struck that man stone cold dead. twice#jb's such a fun presence he's so matter of fact about it. yeah fair enough my boy will occasionally crank out the mind games if he has to#very target-oriented man. he's basically fine with anything if he thinks it'll help valentino win - from partying to mind games#this is why I still stand by my thesis he would've been a positive influence in 2015 and told valentino to just. cut it off occasionally#all this pit board faffing about he would've put a stop to y'know. plus you've got to keep the mind games productive#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#this says more about my own competitive impulses than anything else but I am. so aggressively fine with how vale handled this relationship#if it helps you to not be friends with a guy to beat him then... don't be friends with him...? dude none of my business that's the job#the biography is so LAZY on this like yes I get you maybe don't have the space for the psychological deep dive here#but if you're just throwing together a quote from sete and melandri and casey and call it a day it's a bit. well these are different things#character flaw this character flaw that well this is a Sport. we are here to Win. if it helps him win that's the main thing innit
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fragmentofmemories · 2 months
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while i was drawing characters for [REDACTED] i was thinking "hey i should probably draw a maid with short, purple hair and have her be the innkeeper."
then i remembered eou did that and i've never sulked so hard before...
#(don't look at the tags the post ends here trust me)#no like. actually. i don't like rosa. i don't want a theriaca b and a medica II i am literally lv99r99 and with thirty soma primes on stock#did i mention the mansion in eou is terrible plotwise and yet another way to make the story mode party look ''special''.#and before you mention classic mode. its inclusion in it was really bad there too.#and ruined what could've been one of the very few good rewrites in eou (the B1F FOE).#just cut the ''rich kid'' part. because no way in hell would the radha. a government characterized by its secretiveness and cold approach--#--ask a starting guild to deal with an internal problem which a) has little to do with the labyrinth itself so they *can* deal with it--#and b) doesn't actually impact etria's economy as much as the writing lets on because the town is already thriving at the start of the game#had the mansion and plotline not been a thing and hell. had the FOE been a surprise encounter like the many found in eo1. it would've been-#--an incredible subversion to veterans. as well as a great way to convey how dangerous the yggdrasil labyrinth actually is to newcomers.#because again. owning a mansion for free *and* at the start highlights the player party as more important and special than it actually is.#because if anything eo1 is meant to show you through its storylines that no adventurer is more important than the other.#and everyone's replaceable to the radha including your guild. which is why they have no problem throwing you in progressively more--#--dangerous missions they expect you to die in. it's why it's explicitly told that you're not the only guild partaking in said missions.#not to mention that. again. whatever respect you do get is only by the end of the game when you've more than proven yourself as capable.#unlike later titles which already shower you with praises and the town officials love you the second you finish the tutorial mission.#something something eo1's plot is actually a criticism of the drpg genre and the romanticizing of adventures.#eou not only failing to understand that but actively going the opposite way is just one of the many reasons i think it's a terrible remake.#...this started out as a joke post about character designs.#why is her name rosa anyway that's spanish for pink and she's purple.#actually why are so many of the story mode character names so basic the only unique one is raquna and--#i am literally nitpicking at this point. lol#i really should just make a longpost next time...#eo
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jadedresearcher · 7 months
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how to do hideytalk more efficiently? i'm terrible at this.
okay, so step 1 is you have to WANT to tell people the thing you can't tell them. REALLY want to tell them. Now. Try not to tell them. Avoid telling them all the juicy tidbits and choice secrets. But its probably fine telling them the edges of it right? It's barely even a spoiler at this point, right? Right? This will make you sound EXTREMELY coherent... except only reverse ways. Once they know the thing you were trying not to tell them it will be upsettingly obvious what you were trying to tell them. This will, paradoxically, give you a reputation as a devious puzzle master and secret keeper.
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sortanonymous · 5 months
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Sorta Angry Comics #2 - "Group Trauma-Dump (and Friendship Time! :D)"
Alternate Title - "Angsty Birds"
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uncanny-tranny · 1 year
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Hi, I have a question I hope it's okay to ask here. I'm a ciswoman dating a transgender man. I know that there are a few things that he finds still difficult about being trans (but I don't know everything yet as we've only been dating for a few months). Lately I've noticed him saying some things that make me wonder whether maybe he wants some confirmation that I really see him as a man. Of course I want to do this for him, but I'm not entirely sure how. Do you have any tips?
I think so much of it boils down to being compassionate and direct. There's so much pressure on people in relationships to just "know" through divine interpretation of how to best love their partner, and there is almost no thought given about the idea of offering love being a continuous conversation.
I'm not sure what will "work" best for your partner to show that you see him and not a warped perception, so I really think asking questions about where he is at might be more beneficial, since you'll be hearing direct feedback. I know it can be hard to navigate through something you're unfamiliar with right now, so that makes it even more important that you navigate through it with the person in question.
Trans manhood looks different for... literally all of us, which is why I don't have a direct answer for how you can help your partner feel loved and seen as a man. Since it looks different for each of us, the things that affirm us and help us will all look different, as well as the things that make us feel less understood and hurt.
#ask#anon#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#nonbinary#a relationship is basically a continuous conversation starting with 'how can i best love you?'#once you start lessening the pressure of Being A Perfect Partner All The Time you might notice that these conversations become easier#because you won't feel like you've failed at understanding or loving your partner. you will start realizing that both of you are people#and that people are complex and nuanced and our needs and desires fluctuate#it can be hard at times to navigate through relationships where two people have different experiences (trans vs. cis for instance)#but those different experiences can easily shape your understanding because you have to consider more viewpoints#i definitely appreciate seeing people coming to trans people to ask questions like these...#...but we are ALL different. if you met one trans person you have only met one of us...#...and your partner *might* be OVER THE MOON if you show that you are willing to make an effort and take notice of these things...#...because many of us have had bad experiences before and it can make you feel like what you are and how you feel just Doesn't matter...#...while i won't speak for him (your partner) i will say that he deserves to also know where you are and how both of you are doing...#...because you BOTH are in the relationship and both deserve to be with *each other* and learn *from each other*#i think that's what so many human relationships come down to (romance or no)#THAT is what makes a relationship beautiful... not this idealized 'ooh i can divine from the stars how they feel'#or like the idea of just 'knowing' how to love somebody and fulfill them. that is only a fantasy we tell ourselves...
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leafpool-loves-ashfur · 3 months
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my favorite thing about my Generations ocs is when i start mapping things out and suddenly Poppystar has gone from Bitch-ass Leader who is Mean to the Protagonist for No Reason into Oh My God Give This Woman a Break, Moonpool Christ.
literally all in the span of 3 moons she: has an apprentice, is made deputy, becomes pregnant, goes on a quest to save her dumbass leader while pregnant, leader decides to RETIRE and she becomes leader, GIVES BIRTH, decides "fuck this" and makes her apprentice into a warrior despite him not having finished his apprenticeship
like YEAH no WONDER she's a Bitch(tm), she literally had to train an apprentice WHILE pregnant WHILE being a new leader WHILE the dumbass Main Protagonist pisses StarClan the FUCK off and suddenly its HER problem and she DOESN'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS
AND she had a bad mom
#omg Poppystar was always just kinda that background Mean Girl character for Smokeface's story. but now. now im kinda like#babygirl im so sorry. im so sorry this happened to you#ur mom p much abandoned you for work and you internalized it and thought that work = your value#so you worked yourself to death while trying to protect your siblings. and then ur barely even a warrior with a new apprentice#when u get made deputy. and then ofc ur leader decides to retire. even though you are GREGNANT. and you only get 8 lives cause of it.#but thats fine. its fine. you finish training ur app and you give birth#and you try to be a slightly better mom than urs was but ur failing and you know ur failing but you try not to think about it#you have a clan to lead after all#and then suddenly your sister the med cat and StarClan are screaming at you to GET RID OFF this little fucking PEST called Smokepaw#and your like 'the apprentice??? wtf did she do? she's my best friend's daughter. my best friend who died giving birth to her'#and it turns out she Stole Nine Lives from Cat Heaven#and your like. what the fuck. how did you do that. i only got 8#and you gotta do StarClan's will so you revoke Smokepaw's privileges but whatever. she's young-#AND THEN A FIRE KILLS YOUR BROTHER AND YOUR FORMER MENTOR/LEADER/DAD FIGURE#and of course you blame Smokepaw (even though it was STarClan's fault really but cmon. ur brainwashed into worshipping them remember?)#and so you basically devote most of ur leadership to bullying this apprentice/young warrior#and by the time you realize there's been a plot to murder you its too late because you've been. murdered#warrior cats#warriors#warriors ocs#generations ocs#generations#poppystar#poppyflower#smokeface#smokepaw#rattail#ratstar#ravenfur#nightshade
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it’s insane how Charles’ whole character really is just Conceal Don’t Feel Don’t Let Them Know. know what? that you’re autistic? that you’re bisexual? that you like silly jokes and cartoons? that you give kids candy on Christmas? that you’re a human being with flaws and vulnerabilities who can’t be perfect all the time? it doesn’t matter you just can’t let them Know! conceal! don’t feel! put on a show! make one wrong move and everyone will Know.........
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winepresswrath · 9 months
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the thing about saltburn is that i'm still recovering from how much i hated promising young woman. usually i don't get this mad at a movie but i've searched my feelings and the rage is still lurking beneath the surface.
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quinns-circus-tent · 1 year
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the funny thing about selfshipping with michael afton is the fact that he's dead
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echthr0s · 1 year
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ok but I was thee most hyped person alive for Renfield and then I watched it :/
the only thing I remember about that experience aside from the explicitly Dracula-centric scenes and the stuff that I'd already seen in the trailer is the way I felt while watching it, which was a kind of sad befuddled disappointment. basically I felt the way Renfield's sadboy face looked a lot of the time LOL
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pa-pa-plasma · 4 months
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HATE it when people make a half animal character with like ears & a tail & stuff but it's very clearly entirely for the aesthetic & not because the creator actually likes the concept of a half animal person. those ears do not move. that tail does not tell you shit. the claws are not anatomically accurate & neither are the legs, if they choose to be a little bold & make them more obviously a hybrid & not just a person with two sets of ears. the wings are not big enough to support their weight. the doggirl is eating chocolate just fine & the catboy does not headbutt you in greeting & you do not explain why there are domesticated animal-human hybrids in a world where they arose naturally. *pointing a gun at you* make an effort.
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woobie-wan · 5 months
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I live in the nerdiest city in the country and yet
I don't understand why I'm going to have to ride 2 buses and a train out to the middle of nowhere if I want to see the Phantom Menace in theatres for the 25th anniversary.
Anyway, if you are a fellow nerd in the NCR, Kanata appears to be filling up fast so Orleans is your last chance.
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nagalias-mindscape · 7 months
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So. I haven't made any posts about the all-tiefling campaign recently.
things have been happening. god lord things have been happening.
Medli died for good, i think. It was a glorious almost TPK explosion of necrotic damage that had built up over the course of her not being able to stay dead for good. It's only fun in hindsight, though. I was a little aghast when it happened out of nowhere.
Everyone had to roll three different checks (even me) that we all failed, so no explanation on why she died out of nowhere. She's now being controlled by the DM- as in a spectral corpse since her body is gone-, but I was pulled aside and informed of some things that make me hopeful.
In the meantime, I was given leeway to play a couple NPCs and enemies just so i'm not being excluded from the group because I died. I'm having fun with it. That said:
I apologize to anyone in any of the three groups for that particular campaign that may have dealt with a certain Aarakocra Monk / Cleric who just could not be hit. I was told before the session to be 'as brutal as you can be. Knock them out as quickly as you can. Just make sure to use Spare the Dying when you do. This character has reason to not kill them'.
Self-casting Shield of Faith on myself to bring my AC to an 20 was just too good to pass up. I may have legit forgot about the combat-specific disadvantage i imposed on you all with my use of thaumaturgy before hand to intimidate you all that first time.
The other two were because the DM loved it. I still can't believe only one person managed to beat my intimidation roll of 13 (rolls were 18, 13 and 14), which was enhanced by a wonderful +0 (they needed to roll either an arcana check or an insight check that passed my 13).
Aarakocra had 75 health and whopping (boosted) 20 AC when everyone (minus one) had disadvantage on hitting me. Also had channel divinity to restore 25 health, Wholeness of Body (restore 21 health), 7 ki points, the ability to do slashing and bludgeoning damage with a single action, and the tried and true open hand technique where I just knock everyone prone without rest. Don't worry about the spells- they're all either healing, or party buffing. Or concentration, which would have dropped my AC down to 18 if I had used... which I probably should have, now that I'm thinking about it.
The one 'combat' spell I had, didn't feel fair to use. Spiritual Weapon.
I'm sorry the fight took two-three sessions. That was not my intention. Group two managed to subdue the bird (which is, subsequently, the group with the party member who rolled an arcana of nat 20 and thus didn't have to roll to hit me with disadvantage). Groups one and three are now separated and in cells.
I, uh, am glad all of you had fun, though. Small spoiler I was allowed to post: To all three groups, enjoy your new traveling companion. She's going to be your guide to the outside world- If you manage to get there.
Also was allowed to post the following, so on the off chance you actually are part of said D&D campaign, enjoy the stat page / spells I could have used under the readmore.
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EDIT: only realized this afterwards, but there's a spell missing on this list that I forgot to snap a pic of. Here it is:
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The critical Shield of Faith.
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vetyr · 5 months
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hi, i ireally love your work and i don't know if you've answered this before but, what kinds of studies do you do or how did you learn color theory? i wanna get better at rendering and anatomy but im having trouble TT TT
Hi! Long answer alert. Once a chatterbox, always a chatterbox.
When I started actively learning how to draw about 10 1/2 years ago, I exclusively did graphite studies in sketchbooks. Here's a few examples—I mostly stuck to doing line drawings to drill basic shapes/contours and proportions into my brain. The more rendered sketches helped me practice edge control & basic values, and they were REALLY good for learning the actual 3D structure behind what I was drawing.
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I'd use reference images that I grabbed from fitness forums, Instagram, Tumblr, Pinterest, and some NSFW places, but you could find adequate ref material from figure drawing sites like Line of Action. LoA has refs for people (you can filter by clothed/unclothed, age, & gender), animals, expressions, hands/feet, and a few other useful things as well. Love them.
Learning how to render digitally was a similar story; it helped a lot that I had a pretty strong foundation for value/anatomy going in. I basically didn't touch color at all for ~2 years (except for a few attempts at bad digital or acrylic paint studies), which may not have been the best idea. I learned color from a lot of trial and error, honestly, and I'm pretty sure this process involved a lot of imitation—there were a number of digital/traditional painters whose styles I really wanted to emulate (notably their edge control, color choices, value distributions, and shape design), so I kiiind of did a mixture of that + my own experimentation.
For example, I really found Benjamin Björklund's style appealing, especially his softened/lost edges & vibrant pops of saturated color, so here's a study I did from some photograph that I'm *pretty* sure was painted with him in mind.
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Learning how to detail was definitely a slow process, and like all the aforementioned things (anatomy/color/edge control/values/etc.) I'm still figuring it out. Focusing on edge control first (that is, deciding on where to place hard/soft edges for emphasizing/de-emphasizing certain areas of the image) is super useful, because you can honestly fool a viewer into thinking there's more detail in a piece than there actually is if you're very economical about where you place your hard edges.
The most important part, to me, is probably just doing this stuff over and over again. You're likely not going to see improvement in a few weeks or even a few months, so don't fret about not getting the exact results you want and just keep studying + making art. I like to think about learning art as a process where you *need* to fail and make crappy art/studies—there's literally no way around it—so you might as well fail right now. See, by making bad art you're actually moving forward—isn't that a fun prospect!!
It's useful to have a folder with art you admire, especially if you can dissect the pieces and understand why you like them so much. You can study those aspects (like, you can redraw or repaint that person's work) and break down whether this is art that you just like to look at, or if it's the kind of art that you want to *make.* There's a LOT of art out there that I love looking at, probably tens of thousands of styles/mediums, but there's a very narrow range that I want to make myself.
I've mentioned it in some ask reply in the past, but I really do think looking at other artist's work is such a cheat code for improving your own skills—the other artist does the work to filter reality/ideas for you, and this sort of allows you to contact the subject matter more directly. I can think of so many examples where an artist I admired exaggerated, like, the way sunlight rested on a face and created that orange fringe around its edge, or the greys/dull blues in a wheat field, or the bright indigo in a cast shadow, or the red along the outside of a person's eye, and it just clicked for me that this was a very available & observable aspect of reality, which had up until that point gone completely unnoticed! If you're really perceptive about the art you look at, it's shocking how much it can teach you about how to see the world (in this particular case I mean this literally, in that the art I looked at fully changed the way I visually processed the world, but of course it has had a strong effect on my worldviews/relationships/beliefs).
Thanks so much for sending in a question (& for reading, if you got this far)! I read every single ask I receive, including the kind words & compliments, which I genuinely always appreciate. Best of luck with learning, my friend :)
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