#you'll find all of these illustrations and more inside!!

[the-nothing-maker]

"[...] It is assumed that the thieves took opportunity of a commotion at the Earl's estate later in the evening to commit their crime. Authorities have urged local nobility to keep festivities to a low during the summer so as not to attract attention from these infamous jewel thieves, to no avail: Earl M. is their eight victim of the season. [...]" (Mélisande and Lazuli, my D&D PC and my DM @luposlipaphobya's NPC!)

[imm0rtal-idi0t]

Official Merlin Books - Details!

Here's all the details for the official Merlin BBC books, for anyone wanting to collect them!

They have been out of print for a long time, so you'll need to find these second hand. I found mine through ebay, abes books, thrift books, world of books, biblio and facebook marketplace.

Make sure you shop around to get the best price, and try to get from the same seller to save on shipping.

There are a few extra rare ones that cost a lot more or took a much longer time to find. From memory, these were Lancelot and Guinevere, The Last Dragonlord, The Death of Arthur and The Nightmare Begins.

There are 6 paperbacks and 10 hardcovers. The paperbacks are for 'younger readers' and have cute illustrations inside. The hardcovers are for 'older readers'. Both are written really well and are worth collecting in my opinion.

The books span the first two seasons of the series, and unfortunately weren't continued beyond this point. The paperbacks cover x2 episodes in each book, and the hardcovers are dedicated to one episode (as titled). If you can't collect them all, consider buying just your favourite eps :)

Tip - Caring for your used books

You can use sandpaper to gently sand your page edges and remove foxing and discoloration. A glue eraser / peppermint oil with cotton round will remove any stickers and residue from your covers. You can wipe down your covers with isopropyl alcohol to remove dirt and freshen them up.

PAPERBACKS

The Adventures of Merlin: The Magic Begins ISBN10: 0553821113

The Adventures of Merlin: Potions and Poison ISBN10: 0553821121

The Adventures of Merlin: A Fighting Chance ISBN10: 0553825011

The Adventures of Merlin: Sword and Sorcery ISBN10: 055382502X

The Adventures of Merlin: Dangerous Quests ISBN10: 0553822055

The Adventures of Merlin: The Sorcerer's Curse ISBN10: 0553822071

HARDCOVERS

The Adventures of Merlin: The Dragons Call ISBN10: 0553821091

The Adventures of Merlin: Valiant ISBN10: 0553821105

The Adventures of Merlin: The Mark of Nimueh ISBN10: 0553821148

The Adventures of Merlin: The Poisoned Chalice ISBN10: 0553821156

The Adventures of Merlin: The Labyrinth of Gedref ISBN10: 0553822101

The Adventures of Merlin: The Death of Arthur ISBN10: 0553822063

The Adventures of Merlin: The Nightmare Begins ISBN10: 0553822047

The Adventures of Merlin: Lancelot and Guinevere ISBN10: 055382211X

The Adventures of Merlin: The Last Dragonlord ISBN10: 0553822195

The Adventures of Merlin: The Traitor Within ISBN10: 0553822217

[trippinsorrows]

with me + part twenty two

rec listening: what dreams are made of by hilary duff (you'll know when) // words: 11k // warnings: smut, language, fluff galore, and suggestive content // masterlist

Coming off an insanely hectic week and an even more hectic weekend, your plan from the minute you stepped off that plane with Joe and Callie, who he held protectively in his arms as she slept most of the time, was relatively simple.

Very simple, actually.

Rest.

Rest for as much of the day as you could until it was time to get up and ready to drop Callie off at Kaylah’s place before your checkup.

It was a good plan, a sensible plan.

It’s also a plan that went right out the window when you wake up to find your man not next to you, not with his strong arms wrapped around you, holding you against his equally strong chest, hand on your baby bump.

No, instead you find his head in between your legs feasting on you like a man on the brink of starvation. 

“Oh my god….” You will never in your life complain about waking up this way, your favorite adult person in this life, eating you out with that tongue that could make a nun swear. Never. But, you also don’t know how this man is up at what feels like the ass crack of down ready for some pussy with the ridiculous weekend he had. 

His tongue circling your clit makes your hand shoot to his head, fingers immersed in his silky hair. “Baby…..oh shit, just like that.” It’s so hard to speak with him sucking on your pussy in the way that only he can, but you do your best to power through. “You–supposed to be—fuck—resting.”

It’s the wrong thing to say because this man clearly lives to drive you mad. He lifts his head, the sun from the adjacent window hitting him just right to illustrate the shine of your essence all over his beard. Fuck, he must have made you orgasm in your sleep already.

A damn shame you weren’t awake to experience that glory.

Smug as always, he asks, “you really want me to stop?” It’s the way he sticks his index and middle finger inside of you, watching as your back naturally arches, hand moving down to touch yourself.

Joe moves fast, answering your hand away, answering before you can protest, “the next time you come will be on my dick.”

Feeling bold while also eager for that dick, you taunt him, knowing what kind of response you’ll receive. “So what you waiting for?”

He smirks, and you know right then and there, he’s about to make you lose your fucking mind.

In a matter of what feels like seconds, he has you on your hands and knees, powerful backshots making you ready to scream his name for the entire neighborhood to know at least one of their new neighbors’ identity.

Your grip on the headboard is really the only thing keeping you upright, the force of his thrusts so rough and borderline aggressive that it has you seeing stars. One particular angled thrust forces out a louder than necessary curse that you know almost instantly he’s gonna make you pay for.

As expected, he pauses just to let his hand come down on your ass. Blood is nearly drawn with how hard you have to bite on your lip to keep from moaning. “Shut up before you wake her up.” His voice is gruff and demanding and you love it. Love it when he’s rough with you like this, when he makes it clear as day who runs shit in the bedroom. It makes your cunt clench against the girth of his dick. “Fuck, I missed being inside this pussy.”

Not as much as you missed him.

Joe plants his hand on the small of your back, pushing you down, deepening your arch. A groan of absolute bliss is all you can muster as he starts slamming against your G-Spot. “Gon make you come on my mouth and dick every fuckin day I’m home.”

He keeps you almost facedown into the mattress for a couple more minutes before he  suddenly reaches and yanks your body flush against him, again deepening his reach. 

It’s a miracle you don’t scream from that alone.

Joe grabs you by your chin and and turns your head to the wall with the full body mirror that gives you both a perfect view of the nastiness currently occurring. His mouth is by your ear, biting down on your earlobe as he instructs, “Look how fucking gorgeous you look right now, making a mess all over my dick with my baby inside you.”

It’s a hell of a view, the sight alone to make you come all over him right then and there.

His hand moves to your stomach, and you swear you hear a moan as he asks, “you gon give me another baby after this one?”

At that, your eyes go wide, because what in the actual fucking hell? You’re not even halfway through this pregnancy, and he’s already talking about the next?

But then his hand circles back around to the front of you, kneading your breast and intentionally slowing his pace for a torturously teasing second before slamming back into what has to be your stomach.

He’s so fucking deep in you.

Never a fan of having to wait, his deep voice rumbles in your ear, “I asked you a question.” And before you can try to reason with the man that is living, breathing proof God is real and so so good, that big hand travels down the slope of your belly to your pussy, fingers circling your clit. “You gon let me put a baby in you?”

There’s really only one answer you’re capable of giving. Tears down your face from borderline overstimulation, you swear over your entire goddamn uterus for this man to do whatever he wants. “Shit, yes. Oh God, yes.”

He’s visibly pleased and satisfied as he shoves you back on the bed and temporarily removes himself to adjust positions. Joe lays you on your back, legs pushed up at the same time he re-enters you with all the roughness of before. “You ain’t ever getting on that damn pill.”

That could be a problem, maybe, but it’s a problem for another damn day. 

More deep strokes build up that familiar pressure that starts low and expands high. He sees that, the same way you see and feel his end nearing as well. “Lemme see that face when you come all over daddy’s dick.” 

And like the pathetic simp you are for him, your release courses and travels through your entire body, hands squeezing at the sheets, toes curling, trembling and all.

Joe is not far behind, big body hovered over yours as he empties inside of you, sparing not a single drop of his sperm.

He drops to your side, and the two of you lay there in comfortable silence, chests heaving as you try to gather your bearings. 

It’s a couple minutes later when you notice the feeling returning to your bottom half. Turning your head to look at him, you tell him half joking, half serious, “you keep fucking me like that, and I’m gonna be pregnant every year, Joe.” Thinking back, it really is a miracle you didn’t get pregnant much sooner than you did. Granted, it took a bit for you to get comfortable enough to let him fuck you raw. Still, if you knew then what you know now, the beautiful life you’d have together, you probably would have let him impregnated you sooner rather than later.

Especially with knowing how much he’s always wanted a family.

He runs his big hand over your bump. “What’s wrong with that?”

All you can do is stare at him like he’s stupid. This man done lost his goddamn mind. After this baby, you’ll give him one more. After that, that’s it. 

Three kids is your limit.

That’s more than enough.

________

After spending the morning and early afternoon with Callie, the two of you ready her and yourselves for the doctor's appointment. As expected, Callie asks to come, something you were initially okay with until Joe voiced his concerns.

Initially, he’s a bit iffy with his explanation. You don’t follow, don’t understand why you can’t share this moment with Callie as well, letting her hear her baby brother or sister’s heartbeat for the first time.

It’s not until he says, “just want to make sure everything is alright first” that you get it, that you understand he wants to make sure everything is still going smoothly with the pregnancy. It makes all the sense in the world given everything he’s been through with this subject.

So you respect it, hoping he’ll be okay with her attending the next one, or even whichever appointment will be the one where you find out the sex.

She seems to really want a baby sister.

You’re convinced, however, it’s a boy.

It’s something you somehow feel even more convinced of sitting in the doctor’s lobby with your boyfriend, waiting to be called. 

“Looks like my mom’s flight is still scheduled to arrive on time.”

Your mother, forever the drama queen, opted to stay in Philly an extra day so she could “rest.” Rest from what, you’re not entirely sure, because her week wasn’t nearly as hectic as yours and especially Joe. But, the Airbnb was rented until Tuesday, so it wasn’t an issue for him, thus it’s not a big deal to you either. 

He nods. “I’ll pick her up.” 

“You can just pick Callie up on the way home afterwards then.” It’s less ripping and running for the man who should be resting but has been on the go since the minute his eyes opened this morning, it seems. “Give us a few hours of alone time.”

He gives you that look. “You feening already?”

“Stop being nasty,” you chide, even if he’s not entirely wrong. It’s a rarity that you get alone time with the man next to you, usually having to share, or not share, him with his possessive little twin. “I was thinking we could take a nap or something. The next few days are gonna be stupid busy and draining. My agenda is packed.”

“You created a schedule?”

“Of course.” It’s said as if it’s the simplest thing a person could ever explain. “I’m a teacher and a mama, Joe. I live my life by schedules and agenda. I’ll share the Google doc with you.”

Forever confused about modern technology, he asks, “a what?”

Groaning, head thrown back against the seat, you chide him for his outdated knowledge of technology. “You’re such an old man. Imagine Microsoft Word but better and easily accessible.” 

He’s unbothered and clearly set in his ancient ways. “I’m still stuck on the agenda.”

“Baby, if you’re gonna go all out to take us to Disney, I’m gonna make sure we’ll maximize our time there as much as possible.”

He looks like he wants to initially say something but decides on option two instead. “It’s not like it’ll be the last time, baby. We’ll go again in May if you’re up to it, and I know Callie gon want to go again and again.”

“That girl would probably live there if she could.” It’s half a joking, half a serious guess. Thinking on his words, you suggest, “if for some reason I can’t go in May, you two should go.”

He looks at you as if he’s surprised you would suggest something like that. “Yeah?”

Nodding, you grab his arm, laying your head against his shoulder. “She would love that, and with you being home, any opportunity you have to spend time with her, just the two of you, you should take.” Hand to your stomach, you add, “especially before the baby gets here.”

It goes without saying that Joe will absolutely spend as much time with Callie as he can while on indefinite hiatus, but spending said time doing something like taking her to Disney for a father daughter trip would be another level of happiness. 

For the both of them.

A couple of minutes later, your name is called. Joe easily slips his hand over yours, guiding you to the back. He’s standing at your side as the nurse takes your weight, blood pressure, and is outside the door as they take a urine sample to check for sugar and protein levels. Once in the room, the nurse finalizes her portion of questions before instructing you to undress and change into the hospital gown. 

As soon as the door is closed and you’re laid on the table, your hand reaches for his.

“Everything’s going to be fine.”

You’ve been with this man long enough to know that while he’s adept at hiding his emotions, compartmentalizing them wisely and expertly, there’s just some minor telltales that give him away his truth. Tiny little signs that you know and can recognize significantly easier than most. It’s how you know he’s fighting back unease and potential anxiety at something that’s historically been borderline traumatizing for him.  

That’s why you bring your conjoined hands to your belly, again reminding him, “we’re going to be fine.”

He doesn’t say anything, but you don’t need him to. You just need him to know that you’re here for him.

A couple minutes later, Dr. Young walks in with that same friendly greeting, introducing herself to Joe and leaving the same great impression she made during the first appointment. 

She asks all the standard questions before taking your fundal height and transitioning to the big moment you’ve been waiting for since finding out you were expecting. “So far, so good. Let’s get this ultrasound started so mommy and daddy can hear their baby’s heartbeat.” While preparing, she engages you both in conversation. “You already have one child, right?”

Joe answers. “A girl. She’ll be five next month.”

“So not that big of an age gap.” And you’re actually really happy about that, happy that there won’t be so many years between Callie and her little sister or brother. It’ll make the bonding between them that much easier.  “Planning for more after this?”

Her question makes you laugh as you gesture to Joe. “Yes, but the exact number is up in the air because someone over here seems to think I’m a baby machine or something. I’d be okay with one more. Three is my limit though.”

He chuckles but agrees. “I do think three is a good number.”

“Very fair.” Dr. Young also laughs, applying the gel to your stomach, asking the both of you, “ready?”

You give Joe’s hand a gentle, reassuring squeeze and answer, “we’re ready.”

Her smile remains as she begins to move the transducer around your stomach. Every second after that feels like it weighs 100lbs, like there’s a massive anchor attached to each passing second that crushes down on your chest. It’s important that you remain in a positive mindset for the sake of the man beside you who must be feeling ten times what you’re experiencing.

But then…..

But then you hear it.

The strangest yet most beautiful rhythmic beating expecting parents could hear. 

And then you’re crying. You’re crying because this moment means so much to you, means so much to Joe. His lips are pressed against your forehead, lingering, an unspoken I love you in the air.

It’s like you can feel the anxiety completely wash off and away from him.

From the both of you. 

But then Dr. Young’s smile dims. “Oh….”

One word, and your heart also drops. You beat Joe to it, asking, “what?” 

Her answer, in actuality, comes a few seconds later, but it feels like an hour wait. She seems almost hesitant, “is there—do twins run on either side?”

Your heart drops in a different kind of way, in a pure terror sort of way but for an entirely different reason.

“Please—-please do not tell me that we’re having twins.” That….that can’t be true. You refuse to even allow yourself to consider the possibility that it could be true. One glance at Joe, and he seems just as lost. “Dr. Young.”

She shakes her head. “No, you’re not having twins.” 

And just like that, you release the biggest, relieving, relaxing breath that could leave your body. “Oh, thank God.” Hand on your chest, you laugh a little, shaking your head. “I was about to say—”

“You’re having triplets.”

There’s one blink, two blinks, three blinks followed up with a hearty laugh. Your gaze falls on Joe who isn’t laughing, eyes instead focused on the monitor. “That’s funny.” Shaking your head, you then notice not a speck of humor on her face. “Why—why aren’t you laughing?”

She makes a face, pointing to the screen. “Here’s baby A….” Your eyes land on what you can tell is clearly a baby still in the early stages of development. She moves around the transducer, searching, landing on another indecipherable speck. “Baby B.” Again, more searching before she reaches her final destination. “And baby C.” 

You’re in a state of shock staring at the screen, partially paying attention to her words but more in a state of shock than anything. “And they all have very strong heartbeats.”

This is a beautiful thing for her to say, for you to hear, but it’s the pluralism that you can’t get over. 

“Wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait a damn minute.” By now, you’re no longer crying and instead sitting up on your elbows trying not to have a goddamn stroke. “Are you serious right now?” Before she can say anything, you’re clarifying to avoid any room for miscommunication. “There are three children growing inside me?”

Dr. Young gives a nervous chuckle, offering an almost unsure. “Congratulations?”

“Oh my—” Instantly, you’re turning to Joe, punching him on his big ass arm as hard as you can. 

He has the audacity to make a sound as if it fucking hurt his built like a boulder ass. “Ow.”

“No, that’s what I’m going to be saying when I’m trying to push out three of your big headed ass children!” Just the thought of that alone makes your eyes water. “Like what the fuck, Joe!”

This man has the unmitigated gall to shrug almost nonchalantly “It wasn’t like it was intentional, baby.”

“You know what is going to be intentional?” You point to the wall opposite that’s mostly made up of a large window, providing a view of the busy Florida streets. “Me pushing your big ass out that window for doing this to me!”

Dr. Young gives an uncomfortable cough. “Maybe I should leave you two al—”

“Baby.”

“No, don’t call me that. Matter of fact, don’t call me anything, because we are through! I thought you loved me!”

“Y/N—”

“I think you need to just calm down, Y/N. I know this is unexpected—”

“Unexpected?” Ready to rip into him, a gasp escapes your mouth when a thought crosses your mind. You turn to Dr. Young and ask, “wait. We had sex this morning. Is it possible it’s just like his sperm or something you’re seeing?”

“With a heartbeat?”

You’re not in the mood for Joe’s smartass comments and make as such known. “I wasn’t talking to you, Nick Cannon.” He rolls his eyes. “Doc?”

She’s not much help either. “I’ve been doing this a long time, Y/N. I think I know what a baby looks like. That’s a baby.” She then corrects, “Three, actually.”

“Oh my god,” you moan, eyes starting to water and as you turn to him again. “How could you do this to me? Why would you do this—”

He’s trying to comfort you, voice gentle as he works to calm you down, a hopeless effort. You’re too far gone because now you’re full out crying, very little difference between yourself and Callie during one of her tantrums. “You and your stupid fertile ass super-sperm!”

“Well, I see you two have a lot to talk about—”

“Who the fuck has three kids at once, Joe?” You growl at him while also asking the doctor, “can we like space that shit out? Like I can give birth on different days?”

She seems to be trying her best to be respectful of your haywire emotions. “I don’t—I don’t think that’s possible.”

That evokes another loud sob. “My vagina is literally gonna fucking break. These big ass babies are gonna demolish my walls.”

Dr. Young remains the professional voice of reason. “Now, we don’t know the babies size just yet, so let’s not panic—”

“I do! Big!” You snap, angrily pointing at your former boyfriend. “Look at this man! He’s freakishly huge, and so is basically his entire fucking family.”

She seemingly ignores your probably hormonal outburst, redirecting to facts. “We’ll continue to monitor the babies growth, and if their size presents an issue, then we’ll discuss scheduling a possible C-Section.” She then informs of an additional change in plans. “And because you’re having multiples, I will need to see you every two weeks vs every month due to increased risk of complications with a pregnancy like this—”

“Complications?” Joe questions, and for a second, you’re able to pull away from your meltdown to be present for the possible return of his anxiety. 

Dr. Young is quick to clarify. “Looking at her medical records, the first pregnancy seemed to go relatively well medically, so we have very little reason to think this will be any different. It’s just that taking extra precautions never hurt anybody and is the medical standard for pregnancies with multiples.”

That seems to calm him a bit, as it does you, but only for a second, because you’re right back to freaking out.

“People have baby showers and gender reveal parties. Not babies showers and genders reveal parties. It’s supposed to be single, not plural!”

“Well, you said three was your limit—”

“Joe!”

________

Group Chat: SOS

Y/N: attention everyone, joe and i are no longer together as of today. we will be coparenting moving forward and ask for privacy at this time.

Joe: That’s cute you think I’m letting your ass ever leave me again.

Joe: You ain’t going nowhere.

Alexis: Is this the start of some sex skit? Cause if so, I’m so down. 

Kaylah: Ummmmm, okay?

Jadah: It’s damn near 11pm where I am. What is going on?

Bianca: Sis, did you mean to add us or??????

Y/N: we just got done with the first OB-GYN appointment…..

Y/N: THIS MOTHERFUCKER PUT TRIPLETS INSIDE OF ME.

Alexis: WAIT, WHAT?????

Y/N: YES!

Bianca: As in three children?????

Y/N: Y E S

Alexis: I’m literally never babysitting for ya’ll ever again.

Josh: Damn, Joe….

Jon: Welp….ya’ll will probably qualify for some discount at daycare. Enroll two kids, get two free.

Y/N: NOT FUCKING FUNNY!

Alexis: Ya’ll! We should help them pick out names!

Alexis: I’ll go first.

Alexis: Kelly, Michelle, and Beyonce

Bianca: Alex, Sam, and Clover

Jon: Ed, Edd, and Eddy

Josh: Theodore, Simon, and Alvin

Jadah: Earth, Wind, and Fire

Alexis: Prue, Phoebe, and Piper

Kaylah: Blossom, Buttercup, and Bubbles

Jon: Luke, Leia, and Han

Bianca: Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles 

Trinity: Toni, Tone, and Tony

Josh: Moe, Larry, and Curly

Jadah: Left-Eye, T-Boz, and Chilli 

Bianca: Salt, N, and Peppa

Y/N: LITERALLY NEVER SPEAKING TO ANY OF YOU EVER FUCKING AGAIN

Bianca: I mean, are you really that surprised, Y/N? You’re only three months, and you look four or five.

Y/N: I just thought it was just my chubby little baby boy 🥺

Alexis: Well, it is…..

Jadah: times three***

Kaylah: JADAH

Jadah: You’ve successfully continued the lineage of light skin basketball players. 

Alexis: Warriors finna start scouting them in middle school.

Joe: Jesus Christ, Jadah.

Alexis: BUT DID SHE LIE.

Y/N: i’m literally crying right now. 😭 AND NOT BECAUSE THIS SHIT IS FUNNY.

Joe: She is. In between threatening me, of course…. 

Kaylah: Bro, can you blame her? Twins….okay. Triplets? That’s insane.

Y/N: I’m literally gonna cut his dick off when he’s sleeping tonight. 🤬

Alexis: Don’t do that, friend. You’ll miss it too much. 😫

Y/N: ….fair  

Jon: Yo, can ya’ll take that nasty shit to another chat??? 

Josh: Please. We trying to celebrate the expansion of the Bloodline! Welcome to the family Ash, Misty, and Brock! 

Joe: Those aren’t half bad name suggestions actually….

Y/N: we are not naming our babies after pokemon characters, you fucking asshole.

Y/N: i hope you still like our sofa cause that’s exactly where your ass is sleeping for the rest of your life.

Alexis: You know good and well Callie ain’t about to let you do her daddy like that. She’s #TeamJoe all day erryday.

Y/N: then she can join his ass in the living room too. we’re gonna need room for all these goddamn kids.

Joe: I’m telling you right now, my baby girl ain’t giving up her room.

Trinity: Ain’t ya’ll got like 10 bedrooms or something?

Bianca: No, but literally. 

Trinity: Anyway, congratulations, and please don’t fight in here. 

Alexis: Naw, they fuck more than they fight. That’s why sis carrying the Holy Trinity now. Wasn’t thinking about that shit everytime she was wearing herself out on BDJ dick and letting him come in her like she Cum Express.

Jon: YO! Family friendly, please! Y/N like my lil sis. Ion wanna think about her like that!!!

Josh: 🤢

Jadah: Lex ain’t wrong though 🤔

Jadah: In all seriousness, congratulations to the both of you! 

Alexis: To many more Moana looking babies!

Y/N: ALL I KNOW IS AT LEAST ONE OF THESE BABIES BETTER HAVE SOME OF MY GODDAMN MELANIN THIS TIME 😭

Trinity: Now, sis…..

Jadah: Y/N, I got a river to sell you…..

Alexis: *sings* she’s biracial. She’s biracial, girl…….

*Y/N HAS LEFT THE GROUP CHAT*

Joe: Look what ya’ll done did.

Jadah: Dude, you are literally the last one to fucking talk.

Jon: Yeah, man, you the one that did it.

Alexis: So like, did you come in her three times back to back or like spurts of cum in threes? I’m tryna see something here. 

*JOE HAS LEFT THE GROUP CHAT*

________

Joe is a good man. You know this. But, that doesn’t make you want to kill him any less for literally impregnating you with three goddamn children at the same time. Sure, he’s absolutely right in that it was most definitely not intentional, just a pure stroke of luck, maybe bad luck, but still serendipitous.

And to his credit, you can see he feels a little bad, mostly because of the increased risk for complications that this pregnancy now stands to face. Still, it doesn't stop him from clearly trying to alleviate some of your anxiety about this unexpected plot twist.

He’s overly kind and patient, offering to stop and pick up your latest craving which happens to be the 10 piece nuggets from McDonald’s. He volunteers to help Callie pack, low key a major favor in that it helps you avoid her 50 million questions she’s already asked about this ‘family trip.’ He even runs a bath for you, bath bombs, bubbles, lit candles, and all.

He’s trying. That much is more than obvious. And you appreciate it.

What you don’t appreciate though is the moment you break the news to Callie. Your mom is a lot easier, surprised but also not surprised? Apparently she was suspecting a multiples pregnancy?

She will also be added to the probation list until further notice for such subterfuge, because as her only child, you could have gotten a heads up or something.

But Callie…..sweet, sweet Callie lives up to reputation of having no filter with the first question to leave her mouth.

“Does that mean Jesus doesn’t love you since He gave you all those babies?”

Your eyes are as wide as saucers as Joe closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose. 

No filter whatsoever.

And they just keep coming 

“Why are you having so many?” Callie’s questions are so innocent and sweet, and you know she means no harm, but that doesn’t stop the resurgence of all of your initial, chaotic emotions from earlier. “How are you gonna get all of them out of you, mommy?”

“Oh-kay.” Joe easily swoops Callie into his arms, explaining kindly, “why don’t we let mommy take her bath while you, me, and grandma get started on dinner, hmm?”

This successfully diverts her from unintentionally triggering you as she asks with all the excitement, “can we have spaghetti?”

“We sure can, baby girl.”

He shoots you an apologetic look before taking Callie out of the room, closing the bedroom door. You’re grateful for the dual departure, because you really just need and want to be alone for a little bit.

Stripping your clothes off, you settle into the water that’s heated at just the right temperature. Leaning more on heat than cool. Just the way you like it. 

He knows you so well.

Reclining against the back of the tub, your thoughts wander back to this unexpected twist.

You’re happy. You really are freaking thrilled to be expecting, to be expanding your family, to give Joe more children and Callie siblings. It’s just the childbirth part of it all that has you a little spooked. Callie’s birth really was non-problematic and relatively smooth.

But, it was painful, and that’s not something you’re looking forward to. 

Granted, you’re not sure someone can have a vaginal birth and not experience some level of pain. That just doesn't seem possible. It’s just that the thought of having to do that three times in one sitting is a bit overwhelming and borderline scary.

Three…

Three

For some reason, your mind briefly jumps back in time, not too long ago. Revisiting a conversation. A long overdue, heavy conversation with the one person you never thought you’d meet, let alone develop a budding friendship with.

Jadah. 

In the midst of her sharing and vulnerability, she’d disclosed her losses. Joe’s losses.

Three.

The number was three.

They’d lost three children.

Chills shoot and sprout across your entire body.

You’re not as deeply religious as your mom, but you do believe that some things happen for a reason. Some. 

Nor are you naive or ignorant enough to believe that these children could ever somehow replace the three he lost. That’s just not how life works. 

But 

There is something moving and poignant about the fact that you’re in a strange way able to offer him a different kind of restoration, a different kind of healing, and fill a different type of void.

You could never take away that kind of pain that must burn and rest deep within, but you can give him this. Give him that dream he’s always had of having a big family. Sure, it’s not exactly ideal and you’d much rather have given him three more children on three separate occasions, but that’s just not the way the universe operated this time around.

And that’s okay.

It’s okay.

The bath is suddenly less appealing, a new desire to be around the man you love, the woman who you helped you become the woman you are today, and the little sunshine you’re blessed to call your baby girl.

In under twenty minutes, you’re washed, dressed, and heading down the steps. A smile grows on your face as you walk into the kitchen. Your mom is at the stove, holding Callie as she adds seasoning, explaining to Calista the purpose of each additive.

Joe is at the sink draining the pasta when you move behind him, slightly catching him off guard. He turns and looks down. “Hey, baby.”

Hugging him from the side and burying your head into him, you feel him shift, arms around you as he kisses the top of your head. In a low voice, probably to avoid attracting Callie’s attention just yet, he asks, “you alright?”

Nodding against him, you murmur, “I just love you….a lot.” 

And you do. Lord, you do. For as long as the sun rises and sets in the sky is how long and deep your love for this man will run. He’s done so much, given up so much, sacrificed so much for you. For Callie. But for you too. 

This….this is what he deserves.

________

The four of you are up and on the road before 8am rolls around, Joe’s preference as the official start of your trip and stay at Disney for the next few days is apparently set to kick off at 10am.

The recent consistent early mornings you’ve all had the past almost two weeks make it easier to stay on track and on board, but it’s only twenty minutes into the almost hour and a half drive that things start to get a little chaotic.

Moving in your seat, you look over at Joe. “Baby, I have to pee.”

He quickly turns to you for a second before focusing back on the road. “What you mean you have to pee?”

This man is so damn irritating sometimes. “I mean, urine needs to leave my urethra.”

As if you’re a child, he asks the most obvious question. “Why didn’t you use the bathroom before we left?”

“I did!”

This doesn’t seem feasible to him as he questions almost suspiciously. “And you gotta go again already?”

Rolling your eyes, you start to get a bit snappy, because why does you needing to use the bathroom have to be such a big deal? “Well, I’m sorry your children are playing hopscotch on my bladder, alright?” You’re pretty sure the babies aren’t big enough to be the cause of that just yet. It’s most likely the 32oz cup of lemonade sitting in the cupholder you've been sipping on since you got in the Range Rover that’s got you needing to go to the restroom.

But, he doesn’t need to know that. 

Your personal little morality police then decides to chime in from the backseat where she sits next to your mom. “Mommy, you said a bad word.”

Turning around in your seat to look at her, you ask, “Callie, why aren’t your headphones on?” There’s a reason you made sure to charge and pack them for her. For this very reason.

“Don’t try to deflect. My grandbaby is right. You said a bad word.”

The love you have for your mother and daughter is endless, but the two of them together is bringing on a headache. “Mama, why aren’t your AirPods in?”

She smacks her teeth, waving you off. “Girl, I told you I don’t know how to work them things”

“Mama, you literally just put them in your ear.” Turning to Joe, you ask, “and why haven’t you stopped yet?”

He motions to the interstate asking like the smartass that he is. “Do you see an exit yet?”

“Don’t take that tone with me, okay!” Sniffling more from allergies than true emotions, you sit back in your seat with your arms crossed. “I’m sensitive.”

“Girl, you ain’t never been sensitive a day in your life.”

Yeah, mama is about to get dropped off at the first damn exit.

Forever the curious cat, Callie asks no one in particular. “What does sensitive mean?”

Joe answers with a chuckle, glancing at her in the rearview mirror. “It means your mommy, baby girl.”

It would be perfect if your child was like others and accepted one answer as the final answer, but that’s too good to be true. She’s too smart and inquisitive for that. “Is that cause mommy has all those babies in her tummy?”

“Oh my—” Hand to your temple, you murmur hopefully loud enough for only Joe to hear. “We are never going on a road trip ever again.”

Callie then informs that she too needs a bathroom break. “Daddy, I have to pee too.”

“I guess I could move my bladder again....”

Your mom caving to peer pressure and getting behind you and Callie in the metaphorical line for the restroom sends Joe over the edge. He asks over a sigh, “seriously, did none of yall go to the bathroom before we got on the road?”

With all the sass in the world, you point back to each identifying party as you explain, “she’s young. She’s old. And I’m pregnant. What did you expect?” Grabbing your tumbler, you take another sip of your drink. 

Joe catches this and asks suspiciously. “What are you drinking?”

A pause. “Huh?”

He makes a sound. “Is that water?”

Another giveaway pause. “Y–yeah.”

You maybe, maybe, could have gotten away with it too if not for the little snitch in the backseat. “No, it’s not, mommy. Remember, you put the lemonade in there.”

“Callie!”

He throws up one hand from the steering wheel. “Why would you drink lemonade on a road trip and continue to drink it when you already have to use the bathroom?”

It’s hard to argue with him at that. “Okay, when you put it that way, you may have a point.” 

Joe can only laugh at the chaos of it all, reaching for your hand and bringing it to his mouth as he mutters. “you’re lucky I love you.”

Not as much as you love him.

Or maybe not as much as Callie is about to love him, does love him, because the minute you’re in the vicinity of the wonderfully colorful, large welcome to Walt Disney World Sign, and she lays eyes on it?

It’s a wrap.

With all the excitement and bliss in her little body, she nearly ruptures the eardrums of all three of you with her loud exclamation.

“WE’RE GOING TO DISNEY WORLD!”

Joe has seemingly spared no expense when it comes to his little girl, and this trip is living proof of that. You quickly learn upon your arrival into Disney that he arranged and paid for the VIP experience, which means it’s hands on, personalized service starting with a private shuttle carrying the four of you to the hotel you’ll be staying at.

The hotel is Disney’s Grand Floridian Resort & Spa, which just so happens to be the most expensive resort in Disney World. And it would clearly be remiss of Joe to not reserve the most expensive room in said expensive hotel.

The 3-Bedroom Grand Villa - Lake View

It’s fucking massive. Three bedrooms. Four full bathrooms. A full kitchen, living and dining area, washer and dryer as well as a balcony that overlooks the park.

Stunning.

Your mom is just as much in awe as you are the minute you step foot in the villa, meanwhile Callie is talking a mile a minute about all of the things she wants and needs to do once she learns this trip will be for Magic Kingdom.

Catching Joe by his sleeve, you mouth the words thank you.

He didn’t have to do this. Didn’t have to spend what you know has to be an ungodly amount of money to make this happen. There were ways to keep it nice and simple, but that’s not him because there’s nothing simple about the way he loves his daughter.

The way he loves you.

Lips pressed against your temple, he vows and says the words you’ll probably never get tired of hearing.

“I love you too…”

________

Everything about Disney is even more magical and spectacular than you could have ever imagined.

Big, majestic, magical.

It’s made even better in that this VIP experience includes a guide who’s apparently assigned to your group for the entirety of the trip, helping direct and lead you to the best and most worthwhile places.

Your agenda is not needed, clearly.

Day one kicks off with a visit to the Bippity Boppity Boutique where Joe has arranged for Callie to have the The Princess Signature Dress Package every day that you're there, the most expensive and deluxe option where she gets the full on treatment that morphs her into whatever her chosen Disney princess is.

Of course, she doesn’t hesitate to answer Moana when asked what she wants to be for day one. 

If you have to guess, you’d surmise that Tiana, 2023 Ariel, and Jasmine will be her next three, in no particular order. However, it’s an emotional thing for you to see Callie be so happy and full of glee, especially as she gets to see herself in the mirror. 

She really does look like Moana. It’s kinda crazy.

However, once she’s all princessed up and you and your mom buy and change into overpriced shirts from a nearby shop, you’re ready to tackle the day. 

And what a fucking day. You knew Disney was huge, but you didn’t know just how massive. There’s so many things and options and people on any given corner, and you’re suddenly so grateful for this ability to explore while still maintaining some level of privacy. Having the guide, Cheyenne, makes things so much smoother with even something as simple as using the Utilidors to travel to certain areas.

One thing you were a bit concerned about as the trip got closer was just that — privacy. Especially on top of the whole Mariah fiasco, your apparently being internet famous, and Joe actually being famous, the last thing you wanted was for fans who don’t recognize boundaries to be all over him.

Not when Callie is present.

But Joe probably also had that thought, hence him planning this out so well, so thoughtfully. 

And you’re grateful because it seems to make the experience even better for all, especially Callie. My God, you’ve never seen her so happy. Her smile is permanently tattooed on her adorable face as she gets to meet various Disney characters, especially the Disney princesses. Not everyone is tackled the first day, but that’s to be expected. She does, however, get to meet Moana the first day and holy shit, talk about a religious experience.

She’s damn near in tears from happiness. It’s cute and heartwarming to watch, and you’re so grateful your mother has volunteered herself to be the photographer for this experience. She captures it all. The way Joe walks hand in hand with Callie, how you and Joe walk hand in hand with Callie, all of the meet and greets with the characters, the small rides Callie asks to go on, not too many, but enough. 

It’s all memorialized via the beauty of modern technology and forever etched into your memories for years to come. 

And while Joe is primarily focused on Callie, who wants all of his attention for this experience, that doesn’t stop him from checking in on you. It’s done a couple different ways: nonvernal, verbal, little touches and kisses against your temple as he gauges your comfort level. And each time you assure him with the same variety of ways. It’s a bit of an exhausting experience, what with all the walking and Florida heat, but that’s to be expected and nothing you can’t handle. 

You've waited too long to take away this moment from Callie, from your mom who’s probably emptied her savings with her inability to not buy at least one thing from each store passed. And because she’s just as stubborn as you are, she practically slaps Joe’s hand when he reaches for his wallet to pay for her stuff. 

You’re certain he’ll find some sort of way to compensate her. 

That’s just the kind of man he is. 

The next couple of days seem to roll by faster than you realized, filled with so much happiness and fun that it feels like you blinked and the second to last day has rolled around.

When Thursday evening arrives, said second to last day of your trip, instead of dinner being shared amongst the four of you, Joe throws you for a bit of a loop, informing that he’s reserved a private room for the two of you at Cinderella’s Castle.

It’s not that you’re opposed in the slightest. If anything, it’s nice to be able to have some alone time. 

For whatever reason, your mom spends longer than what’s usual touching up your edges, almost obsessively trying to make them look “perfect.” And she says as such with a coy comment of, “you gotta look your best tonight, baby.”

One could argue you always try to look your best for special occasions, but there’s also this part of you that knows Joe’s love for you goes beyond the physical. It’s deeper than that, so so much deeper. 

As is yours for him.

Still, you tap into your inner makeup artist bag and have Callie ‘assist’ you in doing your makeup after your mom finally feels satisfied with the refresh of your silk press. Silver jewelry and some strappy white heels finish off the baby blue dress you wear that beautifully accentuates your baby bump.

You briefly considered wearing something red, but that’s for Roman. This is Joe. And the baby blue stood out because, at the time, you were thinking you’re having a baby boy. And that could still be the case, just….add on two more.

Joe looks good, but that’s nothing new. This man has never seen ugly a day in his life. 

You’re both taken to the restaurant via that private ride and escorted to the reserved room almost immediately. However, you can’t stop taking in the restaurant that is so heavily themed based on the move its title is based on.

It’s just as beautiful on the inside as it is on the inside. 

“Joe, this is so beautiful.” It feels like you’ve been plopped into a literal scene from the movie, not to mention the added beauty of having privacy away from others.

He asks, almost hesitantly, “you like it?”

“Are you kidding? I love it.” It’s almost beyond you that he could even fix his mouth to ask such a question. This trip has been a dream come true. “This whole thing….everything you’ve put into it. It means the world to me, to my mom, to Callie. Good Lord, you think that girl loved you before? She loves you more than she loves Moana now.”

He laughs. “Damn. That much?”

“That much.” Eyes softening, you say in a low voice. “Thank you, Joe. Seriously.”

He reaches across the table, taking your hand in his and responds in an equally low voice. “Never have to thank me, baby. Ever.”

The food, delicious and probably insanely overpriced, comes out sooner than you anticipated. But, it doesn't stop conversation happening between the two of you. That’s always been a thing. It’s always been so easy to talk to him, to fall into a natural back and forth dialogue. 

You could talk to him for hours and never grow tired. 

That’s how everything started, really.

Friendship.

He was your friend before anything, and even if by some 0.001% chance things ever go south between you again, that’s something you could never give up. Losing him as a partner would gut you, but losing his friendship as well would destroy you.

You can’t lose him again.

Ever.

When the table is cleared and you expect him to announce you should probably head back to the villa, he instead stands and asks for your hand. “Come on. Something I want to show you.”

Curious but trusting him, you wordlessly accept his hand and allow him to lead you out of the restaurant and into the night. You’re partially expecting to take the shuttle to wherever this thing or place is that he wants to show you, but he instead walks hand in hand with you down the cobble path.It’s significantly less crowded than the daytime, but that wouldn’t make much of difference because you’re so deeply in your own little world with this man.

It really does feel like it’s just the two of you.

“I swear my boobs are already getting bigger.”

He laughs at your random statement, asking in a sly voice, “is that supposed to be a bad thing?”

Hitting him on his shoulder, Joe laughs quietly as you murmur, “you try walking around with two melons of fat on your chest, and then see if you feel the same way.” He doesn't say anything, and you instead continue to focus on the beauty around you. Disney really is ethereal. “It’s even more beautiful at night.”

“Hmmm.”

“Do you know where we’re going?” It’s a valid question considering you just realized this is the first time you’ve explored the park without the guide. Granted, you’ve yet to find something that Joe isn’t very good at outside of modern technology, so it’s not far fetched he knows exactly where he’s going.

“Now’s a fine time to ask.”

Slapping his arm, you move into playfully defensive mode. “I have an excuse. I have baby brain.” Unable to help yourself, you add on. “Babies brain, really.”

He chuckles. “I’m still not forgiven, huh?”

Giving him a sideways expression, you decide to be at least a little fair. “You’re getting there.” Slipping into a more vulnerable place, you lay your head against his arm, admitting, “I feel a lot better knowing you’ll be home the whole time.”

“Me too,” he admits. “Your mom should still come stay with us the first couple weeks.”

“I agree. One adult per baby.” You can only imagine him rolling his eyes. “But no, we have to make sure Callie doesn’t start to feel neglected. I have a feeling she’s gonna get a little jealous when she realizes she has to share your attention with the babies.”

He sounds a bit on the defensive side himself as he reminds, “I have more than enough attention and love for any and all of our kids.” 

“I know, baby, but with how attached she is to you, on top of how young she is, that may be hard for her to grasp at first.”

It’s something you’ve thought about a lot just watching her interact with Joe these past couple days. She’s gotten used to not having to share him with anyone. With you, yes, but not with any other kids, any other siblings. She’s excited about being a big sister, yes, but you wonder how that transition into actually being a big sister could be for her.

He seems to understand where you’re coming from now. “We’ll just have to talk with her.”

“I agree.”

A couple minutes later, you’re gasping and smiling when you realize where he’s taking you. You drop your hands from his arms and reach for his hand, leading him in the direction of one of the best things you’ve seen thus far.

“It’s Cinderella’s wishing well.”

You’ve seen a couple of TikToks talking about how this is something that doesn’t get as much attention but is just as adorable as everything else. And they’re right, the design, the location so that it’s right in the perfect view of the castle.

It’s so perfect.

Of course, he has to ruin the mood by asking, “Cinderella is the black and white movie one, right?”

“Joe, none of the Disney movies you’ve seen were in black and white.” Granted, you can see why he would think that given the age of Cinderella. The animation and even voice acting are pretty aged. “This might have been the one you fell asleep on.”

“I wasn’t sleeping.”

“Baby, you were knocked out. You and your lil twin. I think I have the photo on my phone to prove it.” Reaching for your phone to show him the proof, you’re stopped by his hand on your arm. “What?”

He then turns his hand over, revealing a coin. His voice is suddenly lower, almost quieter than it was a couple minutes ago. “Make a wish.”

“Seriously?” That’s also something else you read, the fact that the wishing well is a real, actual well that visitors tend to drop a coin and make a wish with in the hopes of dreams coming true. “Joe, my ass is too old to be making a wish.”

He shakes his head, eyes so soft and focused on you. “Just….just do it.”

The strange shift in his tone, volume, and even expression takes you off guard a bit, but you could also just be looking too into things. “Okay.” Snapping your purse back closed, you accept the coin and move closer to the well. Because of the well lit spotlight, you can see a set of coins already at the bottom. 

It takes a second for you to think about just what to wish for. 

And that’s significantly difficult because there is nothing for you to wish for.

You have everything you could have ever wanted.

It takes a minute, but you finally settle on a wish. You close your eyes, take a nice, efficient breath and flip it into the well with the rest of the wishes. 

Smiling, you turn back around, ready to peer pressure him into making a wish as well. “Alright, now it’s your—”

The sentence is cut premature because of a very good reason, a reason that has your hand over your mouth, your eyes watering and your stomach doing fucking somersaults.

Being in a committed relationship with Joe was something you once dreamed about and somehow became a reality that still stuns you.

Disney has been an unexpected dream you also never imagined would be as spectacular as he’s made it. 

Joe sacrificing his title to spend time with you and Callie knocked the wind out of you.

But this? This is most definitely something you never saw coming.

You never anticipated finding Joe Anoa'i kneeled down on one knee, a small, red square box that reads Cartier in gold writing in his hand that holds the kind of promise and vow of love that’s meant to withstand time.

It’s a miracle your legs don’t give out from underneath you. “Leati…”

“I love you, Y/N. I love you in a way that I really don’t know to accurately describe and help you understand. You’re more than just the mother of my children, you’re my best friend. You were there supporting and encouraging me when I needed it the most. Everything I have now, everything I’ve accomplished, it’s because of you.”

“Baby–”

“We always talk about that time I missed out with Callie, but I didn’t just miss out on time with Callie. I missed out on time with you.” There’s no way for you to hold back the tears that partially obscure your vision as he pours his heart out to you. “And that was on me because I should have married you a long time ago. I’ve always wanted to be with you, and one of my biggest regrets will always be not fighting harder for you, for us. That time we missed out on, that’s on me.”

The emotions coursing through your body is a deep, visceral experience you’ve never encountered. It’s equally wonderful as it is terrifying. At this point, you’re just full on sobbing, no doubt your pregnancy hormones making this emotional moment heavier than what it already is.

Joe is suddenly standing before you, gently lowering your hands and raising your chin to bring your gaze back onto him.

“I should have been honest about my marriage with Jadah. It would have saved all of us a lot of heartache.” He looks so regretful, so remorseful. “Those five years may have never happened, but I can’t change that. What I can change though is how the rest of our lives play out, and I don’t want to do life without you. There is no me without you, Y/N. She was never my person. You are.”

Your eyes are closed as he rests his forehead against yours. “I loved you then, I love you now, and I’ll love you always. Whatever you want, I’ll do. Whatever you need, I’ll provide. I told you before all I needed was for you to say yes when I ask, so I’m asking, please say yes.” You look down to see he’s opened the ring box, revealing the most stunning engagement ring to ever exist. It’s absolutely perfect. “Marry me, Y/N.”

And like the night of WrestleMania, you’re putting all the pieces together. His comment about saying yes, suddenly moving up the Disney trip, your mom wanting you to look perfect.

This was his plan all along.

A proposal.

A proposal at Disney World of all places. 

His final question returns to the front of your mind, and it’s solely because of the hot, emotional mess you are that you don’t answer right away.

You had said answer the minute you saw this man on one knee.

“Yes.” His shoulders visibly relax, and it’s only then that you can see how nervous he was about this. How he could ever question himself is beyond you. There’s nothing you wouldn’t do or give to this man. “Yes, of course, I’ll marry you.”

Joe wastes no time in sliding the stunning, expensive looking ring on your finger, and you’re so in awe. “Oh my god, Joe, it’s so beautiful.” And it is. It’s exactly the kind of ring you��ve always dreamed about but never thought you would ever receive.

“I had it made in November.” Your chest tightens. That was so long ago. “And I’ve wanted to propose to you so many times in between then and now, but you deserved your dream proposal. I wanted to make it as special for you as I could, because it’s the least I could do after making you wait for so long.”

“Joe……” Another set of tears of cascades as you reach up to hug him again, not knowing if there are truly accurate enough words to describe your happiness in this moment. “I love you.” It’s such a simple but weighty thing. No one could ever understand the depth of your love for this man. 

“I love you too.” He moves his hands to your hips as you release him from the hug, hands planted on his chest. “Am I forgiven now?”

Laughing, you shake your head, “yeah….you’re definitely forgiven.” Forever the brat, you can’t avoid using the stipulation. “For now.”

He just rolls his eyes, moving to take your hand as he nods back in the direction of where you’d walked. “Come on.”

Walking and being so close to him helps to settle you. Well, as much as possible considering you just got the surprise of your damn life.

Your body is pressed against his when a thought crosses your mind. “Oh my god, does Callie know?”

“Of course. I had to ask her permission.”

“You should have known that was a no brainer.” It must have been a beautiful, mushy sight to witness. Him asking his little girl for permission to marry her mommy. Callie was probably through the moon. “That and my mama.” Joe is old fashioned in the sense that you can’t see him not also asking for permission from your mom, and he confirms as such. 

“She loves me.” He’s so smug in how he says it too. 

But, he’s not wrong. “I swear, if she wasn’t my mama, she might try to take you from you.”

His voice is calm and collected as he assures. “That ain’t ever happening.”

Granted, that assurance isn’t needed because this man is stuck with you for life now. “Ya damn straight it’s not. All these kids we about to have? I wish you would try to leave me for some white woman who stans Taylor Swift. I’ll call Alexis crazy ass and we jumping you and her.”

He runs his thumb over your knuckles. “You ain’t ever gotta worry about that.” He then asks, “you talked to her yet about being Callie’s godmother?”

“Not yet, but I will. I can’t see her saying no. She never stays in one place for too long, but I know for a fact if she ever needed to take Calista for any reason, she’d settle down in a heartbeat.”

“I agree.” 

It’s a conversation that first came up after the Mariah nightmare and re-emerged after you started the process of removing her as Callie’s legal godmother. Alexis has been a rock for you this past couple months, Callie loves and trusts her, as do you. Joe also feels like she would be the perfect person to take on that special role. 

It’s definitely something you want to discuss with her when you get back from the trip.

Joe leads the two of you back into the castle, but you’re confused when he walks past the room you two dined in and reaches for another door. “Wait, why are we—”

 “Surprise!”

Hands covering your face, you’re buried into Joe as he laughs softly, kissing the top of your head. 

Getting proposed to at Disney essentially in front of Cinderella’s castle was the definition of a plot twist you never saw coming, but having all of your closest friends and family present for a surprise engagement party is beyond a plot twist.

It’s a dream.

Familiar and loved faces fill your vision when you finally pull away from Joe, still blotting the tears away. The room is decorated beautifully, Disney themed, blues and pinks, but it’s the people you care the most about that make it all the more special.

And inarguably your favorite little human being is suddenly running over to you, hugging your legs. “Mommy! Did you say yes?”

The fact that all these people are here is confirmation enough that they all knew what was happening tonight. That they’ve probably been known the same way they knew Joe wasn’t retaining at WrestleMania.

But, the fact that Callie knew does something to you. Makes you even more of an emotional mess.

Sniffling, you lean down and lift your left hand for her to see. “Of course, I said yes, baby!”

Gasping loudly, Callie turns to the group and shouts. “Mommy said yes!”

Laughing at her excitement morphs into laughing at the general responses to said announcement.

“Tag, you’re it!”

“It’s about damn time!”

“My baby’s getting married!”

“She better have said yes! These tickets were expensive!”

“Cue the music!”

The following exclamation is followed up with an old but familiar song filling the room.

Hey now

Hey now

It’s such a nostalgic yet hopeful experience. Celebrating your future with a song that so perfectly encapsulates the magic of the past.

Joining the group that unintentionally seems to separate between women, men, and kids, you’re met with hugs and continued congratulations, but it’s the one from Jadah, the way she whispers in your ear, “you deserve this,” that really does something to your soul. 

Pulling away, you take her hands in yours, giving a squeeze. “Thank you.”

She just gives you a wink, snapping back into her typical sarcastic space as she says, “just don’t think I’m gonna show up for all these special events all the time. I have a lovely lady back home I gotta get back to.”

“You should have brought her!” You’d be so honored to meet the woman who captured Jadah’s heart.

“Next time,” she smirks. You plan to hold her to that.

“Maybe we can have it at my place or something. An informal housewarming party.” Alexis joining the conversation isn’t surprising nor an issue, but her suggestion does confuse you.

“What do you mean housewarming?”

Rolling her pretty eyes, she informs, “I got tired of you coming after me and my non-commitment, so I may or may not have signed a lease for a townhouse about ten minutes out from your place.” An equally shocked and loud gasp leaves your mouth as you again have to fight back more tears. This whole night has been nothing but surprises back to back. “Someone’s gotta be around to help you with this village of children you got floating around in your uterus”

“Alexis…..” You pull her into a hug that lasts longer than the one with Jadah and even Bianca. A sister. Bianca may be your biological sister, but Alexis is your chosen sister.

“Yeah, yeah.” She’s never been the emotional type, but you don’t miss the gleam in her eyes as well as she redirects. “Alexis from Texas is officially moving to Florida!”

It’s the way almost all of the guys' heads snap in the direction of Alexis at her exclamation that makes you roll your eyes but the rest of the ladies feel some type of way.

“And how do you know who Alexis Texas is?” Bianca is the first to ask, which is understandable given Darius was the first to look with intrigue.

But, he’s saved when one of the kids calls out, “who is Alexis Texas?” and all of the adults wisely pivot the conversation, Trinity taking the lead.

“Let’s dance!”

That doesn’t need to be said twice, Kaylah being the one to match your energy the most as you both have a bit of a higher love of Disney than the others. Except one.

Callie suddenly runs up to you, tugging on the side of your dress. “Dance party!”

Laughing, you take her hands in yours, dancing with her, her happy laughter even more melodic and healing as the song playing in the room. 

I've got somewhere I belong

I got somebody to love

This is what dreams are made of

And it’s in the way the lyrics really hit you, the way you and Joe connect eyes and he mouths ‘I love you’ that something crashes into you with all of the heaviness of a life changing realization.

This…..

This is what you always wanted. 

Not to be married, per se.

Not to have that coveted title of being a wife,, the stereotypical white picket fence and husband who clocks in 9 to 5.

All of that is fine and having Joe’s last name truly will mean a lot to you, but it’s not the end goal you always thought it was.

The end goal was to simply be happy.

And as it turns out, that happiness comes in not just the form you’ve always been taught and fed by the media and stories where the prince rushes in and saves the princess. 

You’ve learned that love isn’t just romantic, isn’t just two people devoting and pledging their love and loyalty to one another for forever. That’s part of it, yes, maybe. 

But not all of it. 

It’s the way Joe looks at Callie at any given moment.

It’s the way Callie’s face lights up whenever she’s with you or Joe.

It’s the joy that fills your body when you think of the life, the lives, growing inside you, expanding the family you’ve always wanted, the family Joe has always wanted.

It’s the way the people you love and appreciate the most gathered here tonight to help celebrate such a special occasion, the start of a new, fresh, happy chapter. 

Love is all around.

People just have to find it.

The same way you found yours.

The End

authors note: welp, that's it for book one of reader and joe's story! thank you all so so sooooo much for giving my story a chance and seeing it through this far. 🥺❤️ sincerely never imagined so many people would read/be interested, so thanks a bunch 🥺🥺🥺

i'm also open to suggestions for if our good sis should have all girls, all boys, a mix-up......there's options, clearly. names as well 😅

i will be continuing the next chapter of their story in a sequel titled, 'without you.' i will continue to tag the same people, unless you'd prefer to leave their story as it is here, then please let me know, and i won't tag you. i truly hope you enjoyed the conclusion to part one! 🥺❤️ the first chapter should be up in the next two weeks for book 2!

[olivianyx]

i don't mean to offend you but how our imagination can be our true reality when we are so limited in our brains? you can't talk with other humans in your brains, you can;t smell, taste, feel, hear you can only repeat words and see imagines and that's it..... this world feel so much more real...

IMAGINATION IS THE TRUE REALITY

Hey! This was the same question I had 3 years ago, and I still remember the day I researches the reason.

Honey I'd recommend you to read Neville's works once! He's explained in the perception of the Lord and spirituality, but I'll explain you scientifically along with a pinch of non duality.

♡ firstly, we're spiritual beings. We're all a part of God (if you believe in God). I personally believe there's no God out there, but in ourselves God lives. We're God. We all are. God is living inside our body, but God isn't physical (I'm sorry I don't use 'He' or 'Him' cus God doesn't have any gender) God is a formless, divine being, and that's what we really are. We're all formless void that can choose to exist into anything.

♡ We're pure awarenesses. We always have been. Let's not get confused with physical reality. That's the state we chose to live in, intentionally or unintentionally. The state we're in rn is the same thing in both imagination and reality. We don't need senses to be aware of something. Senses are limited to the physical reality. But divinity soars higher and beyond senses.

♡ We're not our body, mind, or soul. We're pure awarenesses, that chose to be aware of a certain consciousness. The consciousness that is currently thinking about and stressing about the physical reality. Yeah, that's the state you're conscious about or aware about. Let's not pull body, mind and soul in terms of manifestation. They only exist if we choose to make them exist. They only will exist if we want to, not because logically living beings are supposed to have a body, mind and soul.

♡ Coming to your point, imagination is the true reality. How? So as I mentioned we're pure awarenesses and don't have a body, mind or soul. I also mentioned that our bodies, minds and souls exist only and only if we want to. If, and only, if it's fulfilled in the imagination, it can be projected in the reality. Here's an illustration I made.

♡ 'Only repeating words, and cannot taste, hear, smell, touch or feel, and can't communicate with other humans' it's because you've chose a state where you lack all these. Who told you we cannot communicate with others in the imagination? It's possible. And the possibility already exists. And the 5 senses are limited with the body. They're physical. But imagination just is. It doesn't have to do anything. Awareness just is. There's nothing to do. Doing is physical, logical bullshit that was created in this physical reality. Honestly, you don't even have to do anything at all. And anyone else who's struggling to apply this simple trick and the loassumption work, y'all don't need to do anything, just work on your self concept.

♡ Ik I always tell y'all to work on your self concept. But actually you don't have to. You actually don't need to work on it, if you apply this simple trick to make loassumption work for you. I reason I still stress about this is, y'all have been suffering in the state of consciousness y'all chose yourselves. Like you are the creator, you're the God of your reality. You are the one in control. But most of y'all don't understand this concept, that's the reason why I always stress about working on your self concept.

♡ When you work on your self concept, you get a grasp on controlling your thoughts, you find it easier to maintain a mental diet, you eventually will start feeling confident, you'll end up choosing the right state, the state where you have all your desires, and in turn you live in the end and fulfill yourselves. In the end, it obviously manifests. But if that illustration I put above is used without any need to work on your self concept, you can always get your desire instantly without that 1 month long self concept working.

♡ Coming to the scientific part. As a medical student that loves neurology alot is excited to write this part lmaoo. There's this structure called Hypophysis cerebri, the pineal gland. It's size is so small like the size of a pea. Situated exactly in the centre of the brain. The structure that helps in the regulation of circadian rhythm (sleep wake cycle) and secretes melatonin, also called the sleeping hormone (y'all who are insomniac, you gotta sleep or spend time in darkness, since melatonin secretion peaks during dark adaptation or in the night time especially. Y'all must atleast try to fall asleep lmaoo I feel like a proud doctor y'all)

♡ It's believed that pineal gland disappears after death, which is really true. I actually didn't believe until I went to med school. So this gland is believed that it's the subconscious mind, while other theory says that the left side of the brain is conscious brain and the right side, the subconscious mind. But I believe the former.

♡ There's 2 ways how manifestation is scientific, conscious manifestation and subconscious manifestation. You've always been doing this unintentionally since the minute you we're born and eternally.

♡ First, coming to subconscious manifestation. Your brain doesn't know the difference between reality and imagination. In your drowsy state before sleep, as the brain waves changes to alpha or theta, the brain really confuses with what's reality and imagination, when actually both are same. What's in your imagination must be here in the reality too. When you imagine or think about a certain thing while falling asleep (sats and lullaby method), your subconscious mind which is open to receive suggestions, picks this up and thinks it as reality and inturn project it into the 3d world by reprogramming throughout the night while you sleep. And when you wake up you experience it in the 3d.

♡ In conscious manifestation, you keep thinking about a certain thing or you keep imagining it, in the day time, you may have opposing thoughts. So what happens is, there's a structure in your brain called reticular activating system (RAS). This structure is responsible for all your senses except smell. This structure, as you think you need this certain thing, starts searching opportunities for meeting your needs with the help of your subconscious mind. For example, you wanted to eat burritos, so you first think about it. Your RAS suggests that there's this shop that sells delicious burritos. You immediately decide that you're going there after school. Your subconscious mind, which obeys to the decision you made consciously, now projects it into the 3d, that you're going (like bitch you're in a state of eating burrito after school) eventually you'll go there after school! Your RAS didn't create anything, what you want already existed. It just helped you to locate or give you a solution. It's that quick light bulb that clicks when you're thinking something and that works out. I hope you get what I mean 😭

♡ Why do all of this work? Because you we're fulfilled in your imagination (in state) and by default, all this works, cus you're in a state all of this works. You just have to mange the proper thoughts to enter the state of wish fulfilled. Imagination doesn't necessarily be images, it can be anything. It's you. You're the imagination yourself. You create the reality. You're the divine one. So treat yourself and think as God. The 3d is real, so is the 4d, your imagination. Both must have the same illustration or state upon which you dwell.

♡ imagination and reality, both are like twins. Both have the same looks, feelings, and everything. Only difference is that, anything to appear in the reality, imagination is the one that initiates first. Not the reality. Which is impossible.

♡ Now for all of that I explained above. Who's the ultimate GOAT behind? Your Imagination. Periodtt. Just your Imagination. Now, no more explanations rn. Your imagination creates reality. Shushh.

Ig y'all understood something 😭 I just gave my best explanation how much ever I knew.

GOJO SATORU, THE LOVE OF MY LIFE 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️😫✨✨✨✨ I'M COMING FOR YOU, I'M COMING TO SAVE EVERYONE PLEASE WAIT FOR ME FOR A WHILE CUS YOU GF HERE IS PROCRASTINATING TO COMPLETE HER SCRIPT 😭😭😭😭😭 I LOVE YOU BABY (btw, I scripted gojo is my boyfriend in my jjk script HAHAHAHAHAHAHA)

- olivia 🤍

[skitskatdacat63]

One makes him up, so the other can break him down.

This is a little terrifying but hello!! Posted my first fic on ao3!! I would've saved the illustrations for the fic's eyes only, but I'm too happy with them haha. Hope you'll still go on to read regardless!!

As always, my thoughts and progress, since I can't help myself:

I'm soooooo proud of these. I never ever really do dramatic lighting, so I'm really surprised that I pulled it off.

It's surreal actually posting this because for a while, I've thought about how if I ever post a fic, I'll have to make illustrations too because I can't do anything not full force. Look at me now! I'm shocked. Also didn't think I'd finish it tonight, but here it sits before you nevertheless(though as always, I'm writing this past my bedtime before class, time efficient as always.) So with that being said, here are some notes, though if I had known I'd be writing this so soon, I would've prepared more lol.

First of all, I hope it's clear both of these are Mark's perception. Gah, the fact that his face is the only one you can see clearly. The first is obviously him unwillingly fantasizing about what exactly went down last night.

Aghhhhh the difference in colors and settings of the two drawings is so important to me. The warmth and intimacy of the bed behind curtains in the first one, and the coldness and openess of the second. It's so clear Mark feels like he's been distanced, like he's been ousted. It's like he's been thrown outside on a cold winter's day, no longer able to feel the heat from the comfortable warm stove inside.

Mark was probably assigned to Seb bcs he has a much greater appreciation for the Spanish etiquette, which Seb has very little interest in. He'll abide by it when he absolutely has to. But he's just a very non-typical Emperor. People find it charming so it's not a public death sentence for him, but it is an issue. Thus, Mark is there to keep him in line. Though important to note that when Fernando, who has an equal if not greater respect for the showmanship of etiquette, realizes Mark is interested in that as well, they start warming up to each other.

The inherent disrespect of Fernando just. Throwing Seb's clothing onto the floor. Meanwhile he probably took like, 20 minutes folding his up(that's what Seb was gonna tell Mark at the end of the fic.) Borderline ripping off Seb's clothes only to edge him. Its not even like the ripping off the clothes is because of passion or anything, he's deliberately being an asshole. Don't worry Nandl, Seb's turned on by it!

So sorry to marknando fans if their dynamic feels like a complete 180 haha. Its not like I'm like, they actually hate each other!! It's just their relationship under completely different circumstances. They're like two dogs in a dog fight, they don't have any real reason to hate each other, but they're put against each other regardless. They don't understand their hatred, just know that they have it and that they're supposed to have it. The inherent hatred the mistress has for the spouse, and vice versa. If they actually were able to talk without barriers, they'd realize they actually get along pretty well. They kinda just hate each other because of their respective relationships to Seb. And then there's Seb who's mostly completely oblivious to his effect, though of course plays with it a bit.

Seb's marriage completely recontextualizes their relationship in Mark's eyes. Though there's something incredibly sado-masochistic about the way he can't blame Seb for it at all. He's a loyal dog after all. But when it was just them, he was obviously Seb's main companion and lover. Seb definitely slept with people on the side, but Mark brushed that off: 1. Bcs its very period typical. 2. He was the main, they were the side, what more needs to be said! But now *he's* the side piece, and is left wondering if their relationship was down to proximity alone. Not to pull a Mark and completely excuse Seb, but it's not. Just very different perceptions of love and relationships. And again, as I've mentioned before, he was raised to always be the most important person in the room, so he obviously has very different understandings, especially since he's always the center.

NANDL!!!!!! In my Habsburg book I've been reading lately, they randomly referred to one of them affectionately as "Nandl" and it's stuck in my head ever since. Can we start a movement to canonize that as an official Fernando nickname? I'm sooooo fond of it, I litrally ended the fic that way just so I could shoehorn that nickname in.

Speaking of the ending. It was really tough, I almost wanted to have Fernando burst in, looking for his ring, and then coming across whatever that is. But I didn't want to disrupt their moment anymore, it felt cruel. Though shame I couldn't mention that the reason why Seb's pants are nowhere to be found is because Fernando accidentally put them on and didn't realize till he was out of the room.

*I FORGOT TO POINT OUT ONE OF MY FAVORITE PARTS! Truly the danger of writing a post while falling asleep. There's something so incredibly funny to me the way they're talking so refined and then Seb just throws out: "that guy." It's a way to show his own disrespect of Fernando, not even using his name, implying he's just some guy(nur ein Kerl.) I laughed writing it cause it reminds me of the random dry humor anecdotes I've read lately.

[fantasy-anatomy-analyst]

Hello! I wanted to start off by saying thank you for your digitigrade humanoid references, they've been super helpful for drawing my sheep-satyr oc!

I was wondering though, do you have any resources for writing nonhuman creatures? Specifically when referencing the nonhuman aspects of them. For example I have this sentence that goes:

"I jumped to my hooves."

I don't have any frame of reference for this :/ so when I'm writing my oc talking about what she does with the sheep half of her body it sounds kind of off.

I looked on Youtube and online and just saw "Do some world building and give your nonhuman characters human traits," which isn't what I'm looking for.

Kindest Regards-

oh I am doing so much of this in my own writing. I think the trickiest part for me is that I'm trying to also add in the detail that most of the people species don't smile the way humans do, with exposed teeth and a wide mouth being more of a fear/threat response rather than a happy expression. so I keep having to force myself to describe happy expressions in different ways! this is quite challenging, for obvious reasons lol.

but beyond that, honestly I like to just focus on using their non-human body parts to help enhance their body language. my porcine orcs and gnomes wiggle their snouts. anyone with large ears can move them as an expressive body part. tails do all sorts of things!

I think using the phrase "I jumped to my hooves" works just fine! it shows the reader that your character has hooves. The hardest part of course is figuring out how to introduce the character's appearance as early as possible to avoid too much confusion. Looking at my own writing, opening on a scene of a gnomish character, I didn't mention her ears until a few paragraphs in, and her hooves didn't get mentioned until several paragraphs after that. I'm still trying to scan through and find where I introduce her snout lol. it's really hard! and sometimes just using illustrations is unfortunately not possible.

But I think as long as you remember to mention different body parts when they're relevant and using them in the general body language, you'll be just fine. A few things I've been doing with this gnomish character include:

mentioning that she catches a pebble between her cloven toes

using her snout as an expressive body part

writing scenes where she needs to have her hooves trimmed because they grow perpetually

writing scenes where she files down her tusks, because she's also a quarter orc and has some recessive genes that cause tusk growth in amab gnomes, so filing her tusks is one part of how I explore her relationship with her body and gender as a trans woman

I also have elves with long monkey-like tails, though I give them tail expression more similar to cats. Teeth can also be an important expressive body part, when applicable! baring sharp canines or moving one's head and mouth in a way that puts a large pair of tusks on full display is a great way to show things like fear, intimidation, or anger.

you can also study the body language of whatever animal you're using for reference, like sheep, and apply those details to the way you describe your character!

here is an article about sheep behaviors for reference!

and a few quotes with non-human body language from my own rough draft:

“K’arik is the one I’m worried for, not myself,” Morianon murmured, flicking his wings nervously. Evarin nodded, wrapping her arm around her husband’s waist. “I’m worried for him too.” They walked in silence, gravel and bark chips crunching under their feet as they made their way up the road. Evarin spread her hoofed toes with every step, willing a stone to catch between them. A cold pebble lodged itself in the crease between her toes just as they turned up the path to her parents’ door.

The stranger bent low, pushing their enormous three-toed feet over the threshold, ducking their head and reaching forward to pull themself inside. “What’s going on?” He-esh squinted and frowned. “Elkha, tell me what’s going on.” He tapped Th’elir’s arm, but she too had been caught by surprise and only mumbled as she tried to explain. Evarin stepped back towards K’arik, eyes wide. She glanced at her mother and saw her own shocked expression mirrored right back. As the stranger grunted and half-crawled through the low door, she saw her father escape the crowd and hurry to join her. “Can you believe—“ he whispered, but Tawei shushed him. The stranger’s body blocked the whole door as they finally fit themself through it and stood up. Even inside, they had to bend their neck to avoid the rafters, towering over the tallest orcs in the room. Four hooved feet, holding a body so heavy they sunk into the packed dirt floor. Legs as tall as a gnome. They wore layers of woven cloth, all green and brown and cedar red in beautiful leafy patterns, draped over their uncanny body that seemed to have two sets of ribs. Their arms were just skinnier versions of their forelegs, Evarin noticed. She could barely see their face in the shadows by the rafters. Morianon could see them better, perched above everyone else. His feathers shivered as the stranger noticed him, catching and holding his gaze. Their mouth was tense, their long ears laid flat against their head. Morianon glanced away and found Evarin’s eyes, shaking his head in disbelief. “Forgive me,” the stranger said, bringing the murmur of the crowd to a dead hush, “for not announcing my arrival ahead of time.” They walked carefully forward, every step remarkably delicate for someone so massive. “I came to deliver my herd’s respects to you, He-esh.” “Oh? Ah, no, I do know you,” He-esh sat up with Th’elir’s help, clearing his throat. “Or perhaps this is an old man’s dying dream. Are you a spirit?” he laughed, “I never thought I’d live to see a centaur enter my village. I suppose it would have to happen on the last day of my life, wouldn’t it?” He smiled up at the centaur and welcomed them forward with an open hand.

Despite the difficulty, Kouto looked oddly chipper for an early morning and sat down in a hurry, tail curling playfully.

“I remember when he was a kid,” Nanji said, shaking his head, “he had a lot of potential. Shame to see him grow up into such a stubborn and angry fellow.” He passed the tray to Jen who set it on the central table. “I hate to blame anyone but him for his change of heart, but we all know it happened after he got married and moved to that other clan up north.” “He was very annoyed that He-esh wanted to die by song instead of the usual orcish tradition,” Mori said, “Kept giving Evarin nasty looks.” He ruffled his feathers and sat a little closer to his wife. “I was too nervous to pay him any mind,” Evarin assured him. Ikar’s irritated gaze had added to the nervousness, she admitted to herself, but it had been among the least of her worries.

Leaving the bedroom, Evarin was momentarily startled by the looming figure of Ikar at the hearth. She had been in such a hurry, she hadn’t noticed him on her way in. He gave her a sideways glance, lightly swirling the cup in his hand. “At’ali’s granddaughter, aren’t you?” he muttered. “That’s right.” Evarin tensed up defensively. Ikar humphed. “You look nothing like as’el. Must take after your father’s side more.” He sipped his drink and went quiet, turning away from her. Evarin’s snout wrinkled and grew hot, but she left the house without another word, shaking off his comment and breathing deep in the fresh air.

[thepacifistrouter]

Blue-Blue (A Shrimperini's human AU based one-shot)

Hello!

So, you read the title and here's the thing, watching some of @shrimperini 's Portal's Human AU (which I like a lot, is really good, by the way), I came up with this little story that… well, it involves Chelley (because I couldn't not involve that), but it's not the central point, as you'll can see.

Since this is not my AU, that means I don't know how things will go in the future or everything that is already planned for the story, maybe I'm not getting the personalities of the characters right, etc, etc, etc. So... I couldn't consider this a headcanon, just an idea I needed to get out of my head…

Still, I managed to sketch a couple of fanarts to illustrate a this a bit. I may do more in the future, since these only cover more or less the first half of the story, so... I don't know, we'll see… anyway, enough introduction, I hope you like it:

It was his break time while this experiment was being performed, after many other experiments and calculations, he was finally getting to something.

He always loved cakes, but not only for the taste and texture of a well-made cake or the beautiful appearance of a symmetrically decoration; no, there was also the whole process behind i! the fermentation of the cake so that it reaches the perfect point of sponginess, the texture of the cream, the shine and firmness of the chocolate, etc. All fascinating things, but, ever since he had tasted the Black Forest cake from THAT company-affiliated bakery, that damn perfect Black Forest cake, it had become more personal than ever, he needed to unlock its secrets, he needed to get something as go- NO- something better!! It had become a personal challenge.

The good thing was that, thanks to his intellect and his great ability for science, his bosses allowed him to do these types of experiments as long as it did not interfere with his work - child's play for him, sometimes he even did work at night just to be able to complete and test his formulas in peace, as was the case now, a formula to obtain the perfect maraschino cherries, so that the sweet would not overshadow the flavor of the fruit and so that it would balance well with the rest of the ingredients in flavor and texture, that it had a good duration, everything was noted and was tested thoroughly and-

EUREKA

He had done it! He finally had the formula he was looking for!!

He was so excited, he was over the moon with happiness and couldn't wait to try it that afternoon once work hours were over, when he could have the kitchen all to himself. For now, just to be sure, he needed to go there anyway to leave the sample there so he could be totally sure of his success once he returned and checked its properties were the exact same as when he left it.

He had to hurry, because he had to get back to work soon, but he knew he couldn't be too trusting in this place, so, once in the kitchen, he wrote a note "do not touch! specially YOU!! Arthur" to put it aside. He looked at the clock, he had to run, so, without wanting to crumple the paper, he left the notes with his formula on one side of the sample and left.

Unfortunately, his instinct was right, because once he came back… what he saw looked like a crime scene where the body had been taken away, but there were shards of glass.

There was cherry sauce on the table, and one red-stained paper, the warning note he had left, but the mathematical formula where all of his discovery was, that was gone.

He felt a small nuclear reaction beginning inside him and he could only contain it long enough to think, he knew he couldn't interrogate all the staff to find out who was responsible, so he rushed to the surveillance room, he knew he would find Rick there if he would hurry up and make him show him who had been in the kitchen, near his sample.

From the consistency of the spilled sauce, Arthur was able to roughly estimate how much time had passed since it was spilled (no more than 1 hour before he arrived), so they were able to check that time range, with Rick himself being the first to show, but he said that when he was there, that test tube was still intact and the tape proved that it had not been him.

They saw a few pass by, familiar faces, but the deduction was that the person responsible must be the last of them, precisely the one whom Arthur suspected the most, his brother. They saw him enter, leave the camera's view range, heard him read the warning note out loud and mutter (to which Rick laughed), shortly after they heard him called from outside by the CEO, which caused a sound of someone slipping and of breaking glass. Then, they saw him running, holding something that couldn't be seen on camera, but he had red stains on his shirt. It was all he needed to see.

Arthur felt like he wanted to explode, Rick was going to say something when they saw that on the screen that showed that same camera on live, the alleged person responsible for the crime entered along with his favorite test subject, they both were looking at the crime scene. He wasted no time and rushed back to the kitchen, followed by Rick who left Angus, who was passing by, covering him while he followed the blonde.

Without giving him time to do anything else, Arthur continued

"It had to be you, who else could've been!!? You and your bloody clumsiness!!"

Surprise and confusion debated in the gaze of the shorter of the two, while Rick's face and a couple of other curious appeared at the door.

"Artie?! wha- what are you talking about? what happened?! I… wait, you mean…" he said looking at the stains on the table "wait, that wasn't me…"

"Don't you dare deny it!! I saw it on the cameras, you were here, you slipped right next to this table didn't you??! You leaned on the table and threw it!"

"Well, yes… I mean no! I mean!!... yes I fell! but…b-but I didn't throw your experiment! I was very careful with that and!-"

"Don't tell me! And how do you explain this?!" He points out wet, pink spots on his shirt, clearly he had tried to wash it with little success.

"That's not… it's not what it looks like! I was holding a jar of jam when I tripped! I got nervous so I picked up everything as quickly as I could!! I admit, I didn't do the best job, to be honest... but-but I was in a hurry and-!!"

"SHUT UP!!" shouts the tallest of the two, making the other cringe "just shut up for once, I don't want to hear you!! Do you know how long it took me to get that formula?! All the effort and sweat, the calculations!!? What did I have to do?!! More than you could ever dream of and you had to ruin it!!! You always have to be the one who screws up only to be a coward later!! can't you just admit your guilt to your brother who always has to be dragging you along, even at work!!?"

Wheatley just looked at him in shock "But… but I didn't do it! I swear, I'm 100% sure I didn't… well, maybe a little less than 100, but…"

"And here it goes, seriously, can't you stop being a moron for just 5 minutes?" says Arthur with astonishment, "look, if you're not going to admit guilt, at least have the decency to apologize!! Can't you even understand something so simple?"

It was noticeable that the youngest of the two was upset, very upset by the anger, even when he seemed to have calmed down a little, it was only enough to stop screaming.

"It's late, so listen carefully, that sheet of paper that you took along with the rest of the tube was a very important formula with which I could recover what YOU ruined"

Wheatley was going to protest, but he wouldn't let him.

"I don't care if you have to go to the garbage incinerator to look for it, but I want that back, so maybe I could make up for at least some of your clumsiness," he said with a serious, almost defiant tone.

"But…"

"I want it back by tomorrow morning, I'll be waiting for you at my desk or, if not, at the very least, a VERY good apology or else...!" Arthur didn't finish the sentence, he didn't need to, he just walked. at a steady pace back to the door, where the small group of curious onlookers hid or pretended they hadn't been looking, with a few exceptions, including Craig and Rick.

"But… but Art-"

"Tomorrow morning at my desk," he repeated, interrupting, not shouting, but sharply.

There was silence, Wheatley was nervous, Arthur sounded so confident that it made him begin to doubt whether he had actually voted for that test tube and the sheet of paper along with the jar of jam. He knew how seriously his brother took these things, he was sure he had been careful not to get too close to the thing, but he preferred to be sure.

He glanced at Chell for a second, who he had brought over to show her something he had ordered that day and left in the refrigerator, but they both decided it was best to leave it for the day. He said goodbye to her and began to walk to the place where he had threw away the jar to see if he found anything.

"Maybe... I must remember it all wrong… maybe I did throw that and didn't notice it because of the hurry… he-he's the smart one after all… and he saw the camera record… yeah, I better go to make sure"

-----------------------o0o---------------------------

The very next day in the morning

Wheatley was walking to the offices, he was very nervous because he searched, he searched in different trash cans for that famous sheet covered with mathematical formulas and preserved cherry sauce, but he had no success, he did not find it, although he did find pieces of glass that looked like red test tubes with the smell of stale cherries and a broken jar of raspberry jam, just what he had no use for… still he looked for pieces of paper among them, again, without success, he only got a couple of small cuts on his hands from handling broken glass.

Defeated by the consequences of yesterday's crime, he only continued his way to the offices while playing with a pencil to manage his anxiety, after a walk through the medicine cabinet, he was ready to apologize, think of some way to make up for everything, he was still confused about what had happened the past day, but the tension managed to make him convince himself that he had mistakenly thrown his brother's work into the trash along with a jar of jam.

He reached the Arthur's sector offices door, took a deep breath before opening it, closing his eyes nervously (he knew he had to walk a bit before reaching his desk after all) and finally opened it and entered.

Arthur was clearly waiting for him with his best "I'm-still-as-angry-as-yesterday" expression, which made Wheatley quicken his pace a little, because of that and because he noticed several of the workers from other desks looking at him, the news (rumors) fly in the offices.

Arthur stood up from his chair once he was close enough to him.

"Well? Do you have it?" Arthur asks, still upset. It was clear that he didn't have what he wanted, maybe he didn't notice it or maybe he just wanted him to say it himself, whatever it was, Wheatley simply responded with his head down.

"No… sorry, I-I looked for it everywhere, honestly, I swear! Even in the big containers before they were incinerated! but… I didn't find it anywhere…" said while start to play with the pencil again.

Arthur sighs. "Of course, what else could I expect?" he said pointedly. "So?"

"So…" Wheatley looked at him, he looked askance around him, some pretended to continue doing their thing, but most had turned to look, especially those who were nearby, among them Craig and Calvin, who had gone to pick up some documents there that morning. They were all so distracted that they didn't notice the front door opening again.

Wheatley took another deep breath and just spoke "I… I'm really, really so…"

"I'm so very sorry!!" Suddenly he is interrupted by a childish and energetic voice that was approaching to them, they both turn towards the source of the voice, it was little Chris arriving, running towards them with a note board in one hand and a test tube in the other.

"Mr. Arthur!! I- Hello Wheatley! What are you doing here?" The girl asked happily, distracted by her own curiosity, but given the urgency of what she wanted to say, she didn't get too distracted this time. "Oh, wait, this is very important! Mr. Arthur." She turns to look at the youngest of the brothers. " I'm so sorry!! Yesterday I went to the kitchen to get my dessert and accidentally hit your test tube! I'm really very sorry!" she said nervously, the expression of those around her was priceless.

Before anyone could react to this new revelation, she continued, crestfallen with guilt, "I had to throw away the tube because it was broken, but, don't worry! here!" She hands him the tube she was carrying with her and her chart of notes. "I managed to transfer the formula to a new sheet, I just had to follow it to make a new sample!" said the little genius happy and excited.

Arthur quickly grabbed both things, giving them a quick look once over. Everything was correct, everything there and as good as new "It can't be!! Is all here!! thank you, thank you, thank you!! I thought I had lost everything! I…" He stopped when his gaze passed over Wheatley, who was standing there, as expressionless as never before.

"It was the least I could do! Angus says that, if you don't fix your mistakes, you deserve punishment!!" She says childishly quoting the words of her big brother "Well, I must go, I'm running late!! See you at lunch!" She walks briskly back to the door "Hi Chell! Hi Rick!! What are you doing here??… ouh, answer me later, I'm late!" The little girl passes by the two who had just entered and she leaves.

There was dead silence in that office sector for a couple of seconds.

"…Ehem" Rick was the first to break the silence, as he takes a couple of steps towards the brothers "Well… I think someone got ahead of me, but, after another someone convinced me..." says while looking at Chell for a second "I came to say that you can hear a second sound of breaking glass a little later in the tape, but you can't see who it was, so we figured it could have been little Chris, but… we were a little late… sorry, I lost my hat this morning and I don't work without him" he says with his normal pride that borders on arrogance while touching his hat.

Another awkward silence, but a little shorter, this time broken by Arthur.

"Yes well, I… anyway… the important thing is that nothing important was lost in the end, and…"

Wheatley turned his head to look at him in such a way that he gave the impression that he could have turned his head 180° without problems. Still expressionless, he just said "and?" to his brother's surprise.

"And… and… well, in my defense, you can't blame me…" Arthur says, slowly regaining his confidence as he speaks. "Yeah, I mean, you do that sort of things all the time, don't you? A misunderstanding was waiting to happen!! So… let's better just forget all this happened and move on…"

They hear a small *crack!* sound in the older blonde's hand, the pencil he had been fiddling with earlier had broken under the pressure of his hand.

"…that's it?…that's all you're going to say?"

"Well… well I… what else could I say??" the younger one responds, trying to sound as confident as ever "There's work to do and we…"

"…You!-" Wheatley interrupts with a look that he didn't seem to be able to express everything he wanted to say, but he is interrupted by a loud voice from with the CEO's voice demanding that all workers return to work from the offices speakers.

"See?" Arthur said as if the speaker was agreeing with him, he knew that no one there could ignore that voice, specially not Wheatley, who was visibly upset, but still was going to just leave... but after a couple of steps, he turned to look at him, he simply had to say something "You… after- after all this, after everything that happened.... Really, that-that is all you have to say?? was this all just a joke for y- no! No, you're not one for jokes, right? No, this was more just a nuisance for you, right?!... like a.... like a fly that flies over an... an important something for you, ain't it?!! like one of your experiments… like the one you just did and is being interrupted by an annoying something, right?! well, you know what? you know what?? it's fine! is fine for me, you don't have to say anything!… morover, since you have nothing else to say, little less any important thing to say, you Mr Perfect! I will make us both happy, because I no longer want anything from you!!… from now on, as far as possible... I mean, we'll continue working in the same company …b-but the idea is still there!! I don't want to see you, I don't want to hear you, I don't want to talk to you!!! starting… starting once I leave these offices! So yeah, congrats! you'll get what you wanted, no more nuisance for you!! so excuse me, but I have to go back to work, have a good day, sir!!" With that said, Wheatley stomps toward the entrance, passing Chell.

"Let's go Chell, before the tests start" he said serious, but trying to sound friendly to her at least "Thank you anyway" it was difficult to distinguish if he sounded truly grateful or bothered.

"Oh come on Wheatley, don't be childish acting like that, you know I'm right…" Arthur said taking a couple of steps after him "What do you want to hear so much? I mean, well, okay, I think I know what it is" he said almost casually and almost reaching him "…but… but you know I'm still right about everything here!… okay, okay, fine, here you go, I'm s…"

He sees his brother turn sharply one last time towards him, with an unusual anger in his gaze, he had not seen him like that since he himself was 5 years old

"I don't want!- to hear it!!... Arthur…"

Said that sharply, he walked out the door and slammed it, giving way to the last dead silence of the day, this time everyone else simply continued with their things when they saw that everything interesting had already finished, so this time, the person who broke the silence was even more unexpected, the Aperture's number one test subject, and only said one word just before leaving too, a word that fell like a bucket of cold water on the blonde "...Moron".

Rick, who was the only other one who heard, laughed as he followed her out of the offices.

Arthur walked, first with his mouth open and then annoyed and grumbling back to his stall "how dare her call ME an moron?! It's inconceivable, it's unacceptable, it's…"

"Artie" Interrupts his friend who was an expert in space stuff, but who could be surprisingly responsible and mature, hardly predictable from someone as enthusiastic as him, "I know you're upset right now, but I think a little talk for you would be good today at lunch, okay? you need to take it all out"

The man in question only looked at him for a second and responded "… talk about what?… I have nothing to talk about." He turned to his computer, leaving his experiment on his desk and got to work. His friends just looked at eachother and desided to just also come back to work for the moment.

---------------------o0o-------------------------

A couple of days passed

Wheatley seemed to have taken his own words quite seriously, from the first day he seemed to actively try to avoid his brother, he stopped sitting with him at lunch, avoided looking at him if they ran into each other in an aisle, hopefully taking another one if possible, although that meant taking longer to get to his destination, looking for someone else to give him the documents with test results that he had to give Arthur from time to time during the week, and last but not least, he avoided talking to him as much as possible, not even indirectly, he sought to remain silent, do or look at something else, talk to someone else, etc.

Of course, the latter was especially noticeable to those who knew them, Arthur was usually the one who got the most of the talk from him or the few he sat with. Arthur's friends… well, actually only Calvin tried to ask him about it again, but

"And why would I care about any of this? This is just a tantrum, he'll get over it, you'll see how in a couple of days he'll be the same as always, I have no reason to worry."

"Heh, yeah, now you could take advantage of the peace and quiet around you for a change. You would increase your efficiency for a fact." Craig pointed out, he was super good with data, but he wasn't a great expert at these things.

"Yeah, see? Someone who understands, there's nothing to worry about here, might as well enjoy this" he replies with a little triumph smirk.

"*Sigh* If you're so sure…" Calvin knew, or at least sensed that things weren't that simple, but he also knew that at that moment he wasn't going to achieve much with him.

"Of course I am. Actually, I'm sure that if not now, he'll soon start having problems keeping this whole circus going, you'll see."

Unfortunately or fortunately, Arthur was right. Wheatley at the moment managed to maintain his position, talking to Chell at lunch when he could (avoiding talking about the subject as much as possible, although it was noticeable that it was on his mind, he glanced askance at where his brother was from time to time) and sometimes with the few who could stand him... temporarily. Basically, looking for ways to distract himself even with his work, but… his resources were limited since his lunch times did not always coincide with hers; In addition to the fact that he was used to talking to his brother, almost never getting any response from him, but at least he let him talk, so avoiding him was starting to become more and more difficult.

But he didn't want to thirst

This was something he really didn't want to give in to, or at least, not so easily, for once he knew it wasn't just a matter of pride, but he needed to make a functional strategy soon or everything would fall apart and he I didn't want that.

It had passed 5 days now

He was walking back to his room that afternoon, muttering to himself to relieve some of the anxiety of talking much less than usual. He wished he could last at least one more week (since he was having no results yet) so that it could be seen that he was serious, but the only way he could think of was to somehow change or extend his work hours, so that he would have a real, solid excuse not to see him or talk to him, but there was no way at that time, the schedules were fixed and no one would let him take someone else's because of his infamy.

He was beginning to seriously consider giving in when, suddenly, down the hall behind him, he heard a pair of youthful voices talking about tests. He turned to look and thus got the answer he was looking for. He looked at the clock in the hallway, if he hurried, he might still make it, so he ran back in his footsteps.

-------------------------o0o-------------------------

"Voluntary Evaluation of Volunteer Test Subjects?"

Calvin asked, repeating what Wheatley had just said.

They had found each other in the drinks machine.

"Yes, and it was all an idea from your server, being your server me, of course, computers joke there, it was my idea, and I start from today" the short one responded, taking a Blueberry soda can from the machine.

"So, you're going to be evaluating single and also double test subjects??"

"Yep... well, no, not exactly, to be honest, it's just those 2 who do tests voluntarily, just for fun, aparently and, you know, since they do tests at a different time than the rest, there was no one doing the comparative evaluation, so I offered my self and they gave me the pass! so now I'll just have a couple of extra hours of work, and is brilliant! the perfect excuse for-... uh, I mean, is not-is not an excuse! Pfff why would it be? I mean, this has absolutely nothing to do with Ar... rogance! Yeah! Arrogance, this is purely for scientific purposes..."

"Aalright, If that's the only reason, why you never showed any interest in cooperatives test before?" Said Calvin, taking an orange juice can from the machine.

"Uh!! Well... because... because... okay, heheheh, you cathed me there, there is one other reason... but is not what you think!! Is it because, well... those two are said to be as good as Chell when it comes to do tests, you know? I mean, can you imagine?? Uuh And, as you might guess, Chell is my favorite test subject, I mean, how couldn't? she is so... so..." he starts to blush while saying that, but he noticed that the guy with the orange juice noticed it "Ah! I mean, ehem she is so... my friend. Yes, she is a great friend!! and, to be honest I... I just wanted to check if what is said about them is true myself, that's all".

He takes a sip from his can

"Uhu.. sure... anyway, even that being true, are you sure you want to do this? I mean, the calculations for the cooperatives test evaluation are a little more complicated than the normal ones, not to mention the comparatives... are you sure you are not going too much out of your orbit?"

"Oh yeah, I considered that! I considered it and I'll be fine! Because I'll only be in this for 10 days" the blue-eyed man says with a shrug of his shoulder and a 'what-could-possibly-go-wrong' gaze.

"Trust me, I've got this under control, It'll just be a piece of cake".

"Okay, okay... but what about the things with-".

Wheatley sigh, interrupting him, he knew Calvin enough to know it, they were not super close, much less than that; actually he thought the space expert could be a little annoying some times, but, also noticed he could also be a mate (plus, they both were some of the few in Aperture who could handle a Chris's questions rant) and that, sometimes, like this very time, it would mean that he would not let the topic go, so the blonde decided to say something before leaving (deep down he appreciated the concern).

"Listen... I was serious that day, you were there and I just could bet, since uuh you are kinda friends with him and with Rick, aren't ya? yeah, then I could bet you already know what happened, so, as you might guess, I'm not steping back, I'm still not talking to him, I still don't want anything from him, except for one only thing and Mr. Perfect should know what it is, and if he is not coming to me with that only thing... then I have no reason to talk to him OR about him at all... got to go, see ya".

Wheatley takes another sip from his can and proceeds to walk away to his new temporary job.

---------------------o0o-------------------------

At first it wasn't so bad.

Wheatley's normal job involved doing different types of calculations and equations, evaluating the results of some specific Test Subjects and comparing the results of different days of those same Test Subjects. It could be difficult for him to deal with them, especially on heavy days (or weeks), but normally, he managed to solve them correctly and on time, with some errors, but easily fixed (why did you think they haven't fired him yet?), he was far, very far from be the best at his job, but at least he was good enough to stay there.

This new parallel position involved doing something similar, but with calculations and equations that were a little different and more complicated as it involved evaluating 2 people completing tests at the same time instead of just one. Luckily, they weren't something Wheatley didn't understand or that needed more than a quick refresher, but he did need a little more time to finish them.

So the first two days, things seemed to be going well enough in that sense, plus, the plan was working, since his schedules changed a little, he and Arthur practically did not see each other in any physical space and the only exception was easily avoidable. Unfortunately this also meant less time to spend with Chell, but at least they could still meet each other a little, always Wheatley's favorite part of the day.

On Arthur's side, well… he didn't seem to be having a particularly bad time, in fact, at first, when he wasn't asked about the subject, he seemed to enjoy this new absence. He always wished he could have a vacation from his brother's constant chatter, especially since he found out they would be working at the same place. He was always the kind of person who enjoyed silence the most, so he could concentrate on his work or his hobbies. This was just another good reason to let things continue as they were without trying anything. "I could get used to this" he thought.

From time to time he would look out of the corner of his eye in the direction where Wheatley was in the dining room, convincing himself that he wanted to see if his tantrum had passed, then he would quickly look ahead to continue doing his thing, to see and listen to people who had more intelligent things to say - or that might interest him - more often.

Still, he couldn't help but notice the first two days in which he was not in sight all day, especially since it was strictly prohibited to eating in the work spaces. He even thought that perhaps he might be sick, but the answer came on the third day in the morning, along with Angus and Calvin, who brought the subject up in conversation. Basically, he could know about this extension of working hours.

"…Fact, he won't last" said his friend with the violet tie at his side.

"If you say it because of the extra work, I think that idiot could use it, a little hard work from time to time doesn't hurt anyone, I tell you, that builds character and endurance!" Says Angus, who had met them for breakfast.

"Heh, you haven't seen how he gets when his usual job gets tough. And I said it because evaluating that type of test involves more complicated variables, I'm sure he won't be able to take it and will end up giving up, so, it's better for you to take advantage of the little time of peace that's left for you, Arthur" says Craig, nudging Arthur friendly.

"Heh, yeah, you're right…" responds the man in question with some indifference "I doubt he'll make it until the week… Maybe then he'll stop acting like a child..."

"Yeah, some people just doesn't know how to react to things" Said the red headman, causing giggles from the others around (except Arthur) while they start walking out the kitchen "What's so funny?!"

"Nothing, Mr. Walking Supernova" Calvin responded, smiling a little mockingly.

"What do you mean with-!" before Angus finished his sentence, Craig speaks up.

"Fact, you would go crazy if something like that happened with your little sister."

"Uh! but-but that's different! Chris is adorable and would never be like that, and I'll tear you to pieces if you even suggest at it again!!… Besides, if through some crazy thing in life something like that happened, it would be because I did something bad enough for her to get mad at me like that in the first place."

"Of course, because you couldn't be mad at her, the big angry fluffy bear" Craig says mockingly.

"But I can get mad at you, so shut up!!"

Arthur, for his part, seemed to be paying little or no attention to the discussion, he was just walking, Calvin saw him thoughtful, he had noticed it, and although the others had not said it, he was sure that he was not the only one. Lately he had been acting more …cold, even for him, evem although at first he seemed to enjoy the whole thing a little, what he called "having less annoying noises around", he also seemed to be a little bored, but if you asked him, he would say he was just concentrated on his projects.

They continued walking until they each reached his work area.

---------------------o0o------------------------

About 3 more days passed and the consequences of Wheatley's new responsibilities began to become noticeable. The complexity of the new calculations effectively made him take longer times to finish them and, therefore, gave him even less time to make comparisons, so he began to need to stay more and more time at his desk to be able to finish the daily reports. Of course, that meant having less and less free time and, therefore, starting to spend more time alone.

Luckily Chell came to see him at his desk sometimes, which was a great little relief, when it could, cause she sometimes found him too concentrate, murmuring, trying to complete the notes and calculations. And when she managed to find him after having managed to finish, it was noticeable that he was increasingly tired.

((This drawing made by Shrimperini was part of the inspiration to make this idea, so I leave it here, since I think it fits the context))

She found him nodding off the night of the third day, so she asked him about it, if maybe it wasn't better to stop there, he said that he was fine, that he could handle this and that they wouldn't let him stop there even if he asked anyway, orders from the CEO, who agreed to let him do that job, but he wasn't stop until the 10 days were complete or else. Something told Chell that he wasn't lying about that, knowing that woman, it was possible that she did it on purpose, just because this would be something he could (or more like would) fail at within that time frame.

She knew, she knew well why he had agreed to this deal, even tho had originally been his idea, she knew that this motivation was still in his head, because the times they managed to spend together, he tried to ask indirectly (being so good with indirects as always) about his brother. They were questions that she didn't like to answer, because they always involved him pretending, annoyed, that he didn't care, so they quickly diverted the topic, usually something about the cooperative tests and how those brothers were really good, but he still thought Chell was the best.

On the fourth day, he found him asleep on his desk, with his notes half written. This had to stop.

But, something told Chell that she couldn't just force them to talk to each other…or force them to stop this. Well, maybe with Wheatley she could, but that wasn't the idea either.

Arthur, on his side, did not seem to show much change in his attitude, or at least not to anyone who did not know him. To begin with, it was undoubtedly strange so much silence around him for so much time in a row, which at first seemed like a blessing, in fact he still thought it was, but in addition, it began to be… perhaps too silent once a week pass, he even started to feel a little uncomfortable. Listening to Calvin's rants about space never felt so relieving, even when he usually preferred to ignore them and think about something else, after all, space related science never caught his attention much; for him, the moon was just a big empty rock.

Plus, even though he was able to make progress faster and more often, almost no one asked him questions or commented on non-work related stuff, and if they did… they weren't bad comments at all, but… they felt so short.

They were all details, he thought, that he would forget, after all, there was no logical reason for this to happen. When his orange friend tried to make one last attempt to ask him about it, if he wasn't at least aware about not knowing anything about his brother in 4 days, he simply responded that he should be more concerned that, for the last few days (about 5) the formulas for his cake projects were not working as well as he expected or as they should when it came time to try them, something was always not good enough, the texture was not soft enough or the flavor was not sweet enough. That was, he said, without a doubt, a major concern. "Besides, if he has any problem with this new job… well, it was his decision to get into it, he should be able to solve it on his own, there's no reason for me to get involved. They're just a couple more little formulas, they're things I do in my free time, jee!". It was also strange to hear such long sentences from him.

Calvin finally gave up on trying to ask about it, he knew there would be no point. But this had to stop.

Luckily, as he walked back to his sector, he ran into the perfect person in the hallway to helpt him figure out how, especially since he suspected she might be looking for the same thing.

---------------------o0o------------------------

2 days left until the deadline

Luckily, Wheatley was free that day, the bad news were that he still had work to do, so he would use a lot of that time trying to get some of that work done and organize the paperwork. At least he was able to sleep a little better the last night and, best of all, he was able to spend that afternoon having dinner with Chell, it was an hour later than normal for most, so the place would be empty (friendly dinner yet, don't get excited… okay, do it, but not too much), he was happy about this, especially since she was the one who invited him, they even walked to the dining room together, but he couldn't express it as much as he normally would, he was still very tired for the work. They saw Calvin at the drink machine on their way, who seemed to have something important to do, cause leaved almost as soon as they passed by. Wheatley didn't give it much importance, he was a little distracted looking at gray eyes that were looking at him.

But the astrophysicist did not address anything related to his work or space this time. No, this time his destination was the kitchen, where he knew he would find Arthur looking for a couple of ingredients for his next experiment. He wasn't wrong. He wanted to convince him to accompany him because he needed to show him something very important; At first he received a refusal "Right now, if it's not something related to cakes, then I'm not interested", he managed to convince him by telling him that, in fact, it was related to cakes. Carrying him by the arm, almost dragging him, also helped.

His destination was the camera room, where Rick was supposed to be, but they saw him leaving to let them in (it wasn't difficult for Chell to convince him to collaborate). He also closed the door once they entered.

"Wot- what the heck is going on here, why did you bring me here??!"

Calvin manipulated a couple of monitors so that one of them showed a specific camera.

"Oh nothing, we just wanted you to watch something you might needed to watch"

Once he achieved what he was looking for, he made the blonde sit down. They heard a female voice coming from the monitor at first "come on, tell me, you can trust me" she said, but Arthur wasn't looking at it.

"I have no time for this, you kn-!" he refuted, but was interrupted

"And we are not leaving until you watch this" said Calvin, he was smiling, but Arthur knew he was serious, so he looked at the monitor reluctantly "it better be really important or...". He heard a familiar sigh come out of the monitor, followed by a voice that, miraculously, he had not heard for a week. It must have been because of that, or at least that's what he wanted to believe, that he abruptly interrupted himself to pay more attention to what the screen was showing.

"Well, I guess... I think you're right... and is true, I'm not really that mad at him anymore, I mean, I still am, at least a bit, you know, because of what happened and everything, but.... I think... Yeah, I think I'm more sad than mad at him."

Said Wheatley, looking down, he looked so tired, with dark circles in the eyes.

"Sad?" Said the girl in front of him.

"Yeah... uh I-I mean, I know I'm not exactly Arthur's favorite person in the world, to be honest, I do know that, but still! I don't think I'm asking for too much! Am I? And is not like he struggles to say other kind of things - like he doesn't mind calling me m... like must of the people here call me... or-or point out when I make a mistake, either with words or with glance or... well, you get the general idea" he takes a bite from a sandwich he was eating.

"But, you know? those are nothing! Nothing I can't handle, really, I can! Even that last one! For real!... or... at least I could... you know, before knowing the truth... I know how important those cake stuff are for him, it's been like that since ever! Is just something that makes him happy and... plus-plus he looked so sure about what happened and... a-anyway, I'm digressing - point is, I could have take that one too!! but, when it comes the time, the one time when he makes a mistake, the one time he was wrong with something , and by something I mean me! he is just... unable to actually apologies with me!" He takes a sip from a juice glass he was drinking with the sandwich, Chell was eating a salad, listening all he was saying and just, staring at him, as she use to.

"And yeah, I know he was about to say sorry, but that didn't count! you heard him there, the way he was talking, all self-confident, and arrogant and all treating-me-like-a-child! he didn't was actually sorry, that wasn't going to be a real apology! but that's all I want! because is not like he is too nervous or ashamed to talk to me because of what happened or anything, I know him, he is not like that!!... I just wanted one honest apology... or... at least... I don't know, something from him that make me see that he cares" He clinks his glass on the table, anyone would be wondering if there was something more than juice in that glass, but the truth was it was just juice, luckily it didn't spill much. At that point, Arthur was just whatching, without trying to get out of the room anymore or anything.

"...Is all I honestly wanted, not even asking for us to become the bloody Mario Brothers! or be like Angus and the little Chris or the test-for-fun sibblings!... uh, Atlas and Paige, I meant Atlas and Paige, a little local reference there. Back to the idea I was trying to say, I'm not looking for us to become best friends or super united or stuff like that, that'd be... uuh... just... it'd be weird, yeah, that's the word I was looking for; cause, we are so different, like, I don't think we have anything in common... uuh, besides the bad eyesight and being blonde, of course, you know... genetics" He says while lowering the pace and tone of his voice, he gives a small yawn, then continues one more time.

"No... I don't look for that, I'm not asking for that, but yet... now, I have starting wondering... after all these days, that maybe... just maybe... I am, indeed, asking for too much..." His voice begins to take on a sad, almost sobbing tone "be-because, I mean, after all this week that pass... after everything, I bet... I bet... he hadn't even ask for me, hadn't he? he didn't miss having me around or anything... right? probably being happier than ever and I just made him a favor by doing this while I'm all... all tired and doing this bloody jobs for nothing and- no, you know what? Not for nothing, all was for a bloody misunderstanding with cakes!" A small awkward silence passed as they both finished their plate, silent broken by Wheatley himself, who continued speaking one last time in the same, but sadder tone.

"Yeah… I always knew- I've always known that I'm not my brother's favorite person, probably not even in the top 5 of important people in his life… but" he clenches his fist a little, seeming to be trying to hold back a tear "but I never ever thought he hate… no, no hate, hate is perhaps a too strong word, too much of a term for our context, I don't want to thi… I-I mean, I don't think he hates me, but! Uuh, I do can say that …I never... not even considered… that cakes would be more important to my brother than... me…"

Wheatley stops talking, takes off his glasses so he can rub his eyes a little with his arm, and then yawn once more. Chell holds his hand comfortingly, she knew that he needed.

"Sorry, I just… I just got crumbs in my eye."

Arthur stands up from his seat, he didn't need to see anymore. He also realized that Calvin was no longer there, but he was fine, after all, what he was looking for had already happened. He opens the door to leave, Rick was waiting for him outside, so he can re-enter the room to his work, and he puts a hand on Arthur's shoulder and says in an imposing tone "Use the information you just received wisely, boy…" the young blonde stared at him for a second, then Rick smiles with exciting

"Omg! I always wanted to say that!!" The guard with the hat said excitedly, releasing Arthur and re-entering the room, leaving the blue-eyed man irritated, but at least now free to continue his way. He wanted to continue what he was doing, so he tried to motivate himself to go back to the kitchen where he was interrupted, but, mean while, he was still thinking about what he had just seen, he couldn't just not do it, especially because of that last part.

"Is that really the impression I gave him?" He thought "The impression I give him right now? That's absurd! He's not… I'm not…" he couldn't even finish the sentences in his thoughts because memories of what happened came to him. Of that day and that last week that happened.

He reached the kitchen, started picking up the things he had gone to get automatically, mostly out of habit, but something didn't feel right, something didn't feel right at all, so he stopped as he opened one of the tall furnitures.

It was a complex situation for him, on the one hand, he didn't want Wheatley to think that, this time he couldn't convince himself that it was something he didn't care about, there were things that needed to be repaired, but, it was also true that this words, and even less apologies, weren't his thing at all. He was someone who hardly made mistakes, for him, praises from authority figures was the normal; for him, receiving apologies from others less successful and intelligent than him, those who did make mistakes was the normal. The simple idea of ​​him being the one to apologize was difficult enough, but for it to be with someone like his brother, who was capable of tripping over his own feet two or three times in a day or more, was… it was almost unthinkable, unbearable! Not to mention that he never had the gift of words, especially for such… emotional situations… but… it was fair, right? Independent of everything else or what he thought of his older brother, trying to be as objective as he liked to be, didn't he deserve it? After everything, didn't Wheatley deserve to at least to try? Was he willing? It was a decision that could involve everything returning to the way it was or staying as it is, or maybe there are just changes that are not visible to the naked eye.

He looked at the cabinet for a few seconds, it was full of different ingredients that he was allowed to use and store there, half of that cabinet were things that he kept there to have on hand for his pastry projects.

There were things that needed to be repaired, and he had made a decision; he knew that he did not have the conventional resources to accomplish the task, but, at least he could try with his own resources. It would take some time, so he just hoped he wasn't too late. He took some things from the cabinet and left

---------------------o0o------------------------

Afternoon of the last day, time and deadline.

Wheatley was walking down the hallway towards his boss's office, he was carrying a folder with several documents, all of them had to be delivered at that very moment and he was trying to finish filling out one of the sheets on the way. He should be feeling relieved that all that extra work was finally over, but he couldn't yet.

First because he knew that they had given him a kind of indirect ultimatum, he needed to deliver everything without errors or else… he didn't even want to think about what they would do to him, especially HER. He therefore had to go over each of the equations several times, finding errors and correcting them, which made him fall further behind with the other documents. At that moment he only needed to finish filling out the most important one, which came on a pink sheet of paper. He couldn't afford to stop, since they had given him a specific time to deliver, so he was going in such a hurry that he did not pay the slightest attention to what was happening or to those who passed around him in the hallways.

He was already close to it, so he put the document in the folder at his side and quickened his pace even more. After this, all that was left was to show the results to the siblings, but luckily, that was always the easiest part and it could be the next day, by then everything would be calmer.

But now he was anxious (and stressed) to finally finish this, he hadn't even had breakfast that morning. Not to mention that he hadn't been able to think too much about what he would do once it was finished, he didn't seem to have accomplished anything with this idea, but he didn't want to have to think about that right at that moment or he would get distracted.

Finally he arrives at the office of the CEO, Ms. Gladys, a truly brilliant, but terrifying woman who clearly didn't liked him much and made little effort to hide it, so he was very nervous. He stood as firm as he could, took a breath, and was about to knock on the door when it opened just before.

There she was, waiting for him. She didn't even let him in, she just asked him to give her the main file to review right there and, apart from it, the folder with the others.

"And I know I don't have to remind you… oh, wait, someone like you definitely needs to be reminded, so I will, if I find a single mistake in that file, I assure you there will be consequences, big bad consequences for you. I hope I made myself clear, because if not, I'll make sure of it by making the consequences bigger. Now give them to me."

Wheatley, who managed to be more nervous than before by those encouraging words, grabbed the file to take out the document, hoping, he really hoped he hadn't made any miscalculations, he finished it so hastily that it was more than possible that he had. But it was worst, because he realize that there was no pink sheet of paper between them. It must have fallen in the hallway in his haste to get there. The malicious smile his boss gave when she noticed that he was taking a while to find what he was looking for only made things even worst.

But before either of them could say anything about it.

"I think this is yours," said a familiar voice behind Wheatley, who turned quickly to see who it was because of the fright, "I told you to be more careful… here."

Wheatley was surprised to see his brother or to have his speak to him and even more of see the pink file in his hand. Gladys took the sheet of paper, which was undoubtedly his (it was crumpled) before he could and looked it over right there, very thoroughly. They both watched as her expression changed slightly to becoming more and more annoyed, she even gave them both a suspicious look, which especially scared one of them, while the other seemed more or less as calm as ever, anyway. Their boss's response was unexpected. "It's all right…*sigh*, fine, just give me the rest of the folder and go, now".

Wheatley, still in shock, managed to give her the rest of the documents while the CEO closed the door to her office in his face. At least that served to wake him up. Both brothers remained silent for a few seconds looking at the door, then they looked at each other, Wheatley noticed that he was carrying a small, neat cardboard box with handles. Surprisingly, it wasn't the short one who broke the silence this time.

"Oi…it's a little late…shall we get a cup of tea?" It was undoubtedly a question that caught Wheatley off guard, he was not expecting it at all, in fact he expected him to just walk away and that's it. Maybe that's why he didn't even try to question it and just nodded and walked to the dining room (Arthur used Low Guard, it was super effective!).

---------------------o0o------------------------

There was almost no one around in the place, so there were only the two of them at the table, with a cup of tea each, at first neither of them said anything because, strangely enough, neither of them knew what to say.

Arthur sighed and decided to break the silence a second time "Listen Wheatley, I'm going to tell you something and I want you to listen to it well, because I'm not going to repeat it, undertand?! This is not easy…okay, ehem... Wheatley I… I… for what happened that time… I'm sorry... I'm really sorry." It was something that clearly was difficult for him to say, so Wheatley did not interrupt him, but the surprise on his face was noticeable, it even seemed that he thought perhaps Arthur was sick, which made the matter more awkward, but he still continued.

"I was very unfair to you and… well I… at first I really thought it was fine because I thought it was you, okay?! Everything seemed so… and you… and...- aaagh! this is not working! this apologizing thing It's not my thing! I'm not the one who should be apologizing for making such a stupid mistake! I'm not one who does that kind of things!!… but..." for a moment he began to despair as he said all that, it was something he also needed to get off his chest "… but I did… this time I did...I was unfair to you, in several ways; you didn't deserve to be treated like that, not even for cakes, even less for pride and, well… I know that maybe it doesn't make up for much… or I don't know, the truth is I don't know much about these things, but… ehem... here… just don't get used to it!... and again... I'm sorry"

He puts the box that he had brought with him for a while between them, it was one of those boxes for moving rectangular cakes, and opens it. To Wheatley's surprise, it was not a square Black Forest Cake, it was a Chocolate Battenberg Cake, his favorite.

He looked at the cake, then looked at Arthur who had looked away, as if he was running out of words and he didn't know what to say and didn't want to try either. Luckily it wasn't necessary, it was a gesture that spoke for itself. To begin with, Wheatley knew that although it was not his favorite cake, his brother was much more into making his own cakes than buying them, it was a matter of personal pride, the only ones he bought were always from his favorite bakery and that store did not sell this cake.

Arthur managed to say one only thing more "…well?"

Wheatley's look was a curious mix of surprise, excitement, and disbelief, it was as if he didn't know whether to smile or not as he tried to process everything. Finally, he sobbed a little and smiled at him "I… I really don't know what to say, to be honest, I didn't expect something like this at all! I even thought that… well… a lot of things... nasty things, actually. I really thought that you… uh, well, you know what? you know what? Never mind, never mind now! I was wrong about those things and… god, I never thought it could feel so good to be wrong! There should be some kind of achievement for that in life!! hehe, I-I can't believe it! I... just.... thank you... Artie... is really- it was really all I wanted to hear... plus a surprise!" He wanted to hug him, but neither of them were big on hugs, especially not between them, so he stayed where he was. He knew that this wouldn't make them suddenly friends by any means, things wouldn't change much, they would probably stay more or less the same as before, but at least this made clear some things that were needed to be known between them.

"Now let's see, we have to try this before the tea gets cold, that would be a shame as well as rude for the tea and the cake!" The eldest says excitedly, taking a bite without wasting any more time, it was funny how someone could managed to be gangly and have manners at the same time, a fascinating phenomenon to some extent. Wheatley seemed surprised once he took that bite, in a good way.

"…You…you used nan's recipe! omg! so fluffy and soft <3 <3 <3"

His smile while eating was priceless

"Uh… yeah" his little brother responds with some surprise "… it's the only recipe I had on hand, I didn't have time to do a comparative research of recipes as normal… but how did you know??"

"Huh, no one else could achieve this texture, it's one of nans's super powers, like they all always know what to do when something hurts without having any medical studies, as if they have a… kind of… pre-integrated medicine chip or something! or how they always manage to make the coats so warm, but they still always itch as hell!! is like, you know, one of those… uh, mysteries of life and science" He says taking another bite "I can't believe you managed to replicate it so well, Mr Perfect, this is tremendous! you must be very proud, you should!… and don't look at me with that face"

Arthur had that 'you're a child' look, but he almost looked like he wanted to smile this time.

"Come on, if you don't believe me, try it"

"No, no, I'm fine, is yours and-"

"It can't be, Artie, I'm so disappointed! don't you know? It's a very important rule, a chef must always taste his creations!! And! And- in this case, you would be the chef and the cake is your creation anyway, so it's your responsibility! So, unless you put something like... uh like poison in this thing or you don't think you actuallt did a good job, it's your responsibility, so come on!"

He brings the cake a little closer to him. Arthur gives up because he was curious to try the results of this cake anyway, considering the circumstances in which he made it, he was afraid to find something disappointing again compared to his previous creations, as it had been happening that week and he was a perfectionist. He took a bite and, to his surprise, it was good, without a doubt he had measured up. It wasn't perfect, tho, but there was something with it, he couldn't explain what or why, but there it was.

"Heh, see? It's good right? You're not fooling me. I told you! you should be proud, you absolutely should!" He says taking a sip of his tea "now, come on and help me finish it"

None of them noticed that there were 2 persons looking at them from the entrance door, a woman and a man, who just smile at the scene and, knowing that thing would probably go back to normal soon, they decided to leave them alone, their job there was done.

Arthur just sighed and toke another bite, he did want to keep eating it anyway so maybe he could be able to descipher that something he cound't understand. For now, he would just allow himself to enjoy that unperfect something for this one time, that unperfect something that, somehow, made the cake this cake sweeter than ever.

Aaand that was it, thanks for those who did read it till the end, it was longer than I was expecting o.ou

Hope you also liked it, specially Shrimps, if she read this. I don't know if I got the characterizations well, I hope I did at least well enough, I'm accepting any correction.

Thanks again to everyone who read this, but now, I have to do a few stuff before my next plushing, so.... well, see you next time

Bye!!

[swantranslations]

Fullmetal Alchemist Exhibition -Hong Kong- Highlights & Cafe Menu

Guess WHO just came back from the fma exhibition today! I am still in my serotonin rush as I type out this post. Upon a mutual's request, I am sharing highlights and key features of this time's exhibition, especially the Hong Kong-only elements. Hope this helps anyone who is considering going and wants to know more about it!

All photos here are taken by myself. (aside from the last few which are from a news report)

See also: list of available goods + pricing (to be updated)

♡♡♡♡

Obligatory Entrance Photo!

Same as the original exhibition in Japan, at the entrance, there's the 20th anniversary Ed & Al figure, a 1:1 Al statue, and an animated transmutation circle that you can pose at.

(It is very hard to get the right timing to put down your hands though, since it moves really fast xD)

♡♡♡♡

Copies of 300+ genka are shown, and as you can see here, translated versions of the comic panels are displayed underneath the framed genka copies, which I think is very nice.

Unfortunately, much like the previous Malaysia exhibit, these are not the original genkas (it's probably too risky to ship them overseas?) but seeing these copies still made me really happy and the set-up is really awesome:) (link to set-up video)

Can't forget the coloured pages, of course! There's also one original signed illustration, but you're not allowed to take pictures of it, which is a bit sad but understandable.

There are also multiple special animations; check one of them out here!

♡♡♡♡

Costumes and props from the live-action movie are also displayed. The level of detail is really really nice ^^

♡♡♡♡

HK limited photo spots (modelled by me):

I am not sure if it's 100% accurate, but from what I have heard these two photo spots are Hong Kong-only. Please correct me if I am wrong!

Left: a wall with Mei's kunai that you can pose in front of and pretend to be Ed gaining back his right arm. Absolutely impossible to take a photo there while maintaining a straight face because it is ungodly hilarious and ridiculous. 6/10

Right: Gate of Truth door curtain near the exit; Very fun to push open and act out another iconic Ed scene (video link), or sit there and speak in a mocking ominous tone. 10/10

♡♡♡♡

Cafe:

After the exhibition, you can find the cafe inside the gift shop area. There are two extra-special items and a few other snacks that you can order; Listing all food items & their prices below!

Because I didn't order the special items, the below three photos are from HK01's report on the exhibition.

Left: The Flame Transmutation Set is fish cake + yakitori, and when you order it you'll get the food in a small black box, then the staff will help you light it up when you snap at it; basically you can pretend to be Mustang and "cook" the yakitori yourself xD

Right: The (Full)metal Transmutation Drink is peach soda, but it comes unmixed; you can put it on a special table with a transmutation circle drawn on it, and the table will shake and mix the drink for you. The idea is you can make your own liquid philosopher's stone and drink it lol

I think they're both really stupid but in an endearing way I guess lmao

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It's really late so I will organize and post the list of available goods tmr :3 stay tuned!

[vixenmaggie]

Fecioara de fier

06.05.2024

Care sunt țepușele înfipte în tine, a mea fecioară?

Să fie oare păcatele noastre care-ncep să te doară?

Și de ce nu iese sânge cald din rănile tale...

Ci e doar baltă rece de lacrimi, jos la poale?

Dragă copilă, de ce ai luat chinurile noastre,

În suprema fecioară de fier, în loc de suflete-ncăperi sihastre?

De ce ne ștropești cu plânset și ne șoptești rugăciune:

Că suntem mai mult decât praful din străvechile astre, cu gura ta, mică minune?

Cum putem permite lumea-a te tortura,

Lăsând în noi să crească, spre cunună de spini, ura?

Cum facem din mărăcini, o rană pentru tine...?

Și din neghină, sursă de viitură de lacrimi, care nouă nu ne vine?

Fecioara noastră, cum lovim cu trestia capul tău, cu nimb sfânt,

Dar te uităm închisă în sicriul de metal, clopot fără cânt...

Lasă-mă să iau o clipă durerea ta...

Și să-ți alin cristalele din ochii roșii-ndurerați... un ghimpe de trandafir spre-a reteza.

Închisă în instrumentul de durere al lumii, trădare a ideii de fecioară,

Trebuie să prevenim, cu orice preț, ca acest crin să moară...

Dulce milostivă fecioară, cum putem percepe și începe-a înțelege

Sacrificiul tău suprem... sfărâmarea crudă-a trupului tău, prin lege?

Iartă-ne pe toți, pe noi, cei care binele îl regretăm...

Iartă-ne că încă-un spin, ca țepușă-adăugăm!

Cer atâta doar, să ai un loc alături, pentru mine...

Un loc în fecioara de fier, împreună cu tine.

Aflu că-n fecioară eram și eu... De la început am fost eu,

Dar undeva mult prea departe, veghea și Dumnezeu.

~Stefan

My friend wrote a poem in Romanian and I wanted to draw illustration for it. I will leave original and translation with his permission lower. But perhaps the rhythm and structure will be lost in translation. Hope you'll like it.

Translate:

Iron Maiden

06.05.2024

Which are the spikes that entered into you, my maiden?

Are they those of our sin, that have started hurting you?

And why is no warm blood flowing from your wounds...

But a cool pool of tears is amassing, by your lap?

Dear child, why did you take our trials

To the supreme Iron Maiden, instead of the empty soul-rooms?

Why do you sprinkle your weeping and whisper your prayers:

”That we are more than the dust from ancient stars”, with heavy heart, my little wonder?

How can we allow the world to torture you,

Leaving inside us, to grow, a crown of thorns that becomes hatred?

Why do we create a wound for you, from briar?

And from the tares, a source for the flooding of tears that eludes us?

Our maiden, how can we hit your haloed holy head with spite,

But we forget you locked inside your metal coffin, bell with no sound...?

Let me take away your pain for a moment...

And let me wipe away the crystals in your reddened-pain filled eyes... a thorn on the rose to let wither and die.

Locked away in the instrument of the world’s pain, betrayal of the idea of maiden,

We must prevent, no matter the cost, this lily to be cut and cast aside...

Sweet merciful maiden, how can we begin to understand and perceive

Your supreme sacrifice... the savage crushing of your body, by the law?

Forgive us all, us, those who regret the good we did...

Forgive us, for every thorn we add, but turned to spike!

I ask only of this, to save a place for me, together,

A place inside the Iron Maiden, by your side.

Now I find, that I was there, inside the maiden... From the start, it was me...

But somewhere much too far away, God watched.

[rpgsandbox]

Are you ready to return to The Wood?

The Wood surrounds and divides the realm and anyone (or anything) that has not yet sworn fealty. The Wood is not one forest, but all forests. The Root is the realm of mystery and horror underneath, and does not care for the petty divisions overground.

Cairn is the DriveThruRPG Platinum Best Selling adventure game about exploring a dark and mysterious Wood filled with strange folk, hidden treasure, and unspeakable monstrosities. Character generation is quick and random, adventures are tense and reward careful exploration, and combat is frantic and deadly. The first edition rules are freely available here, and should be familiar to any fans of Knave and Into the Odd.

The definitive second edition has been freshly revised and developed, and includes an expanded Player’s Guide, a brand new Warden’s Guide, and a new adventure Trouble in Twin Lakes in a robust and lavishly illustrated boxed set packed with useful gaming tools.

Digital mockups, final presentation may differ.

If you’re looking for a rules-light, player-forward system for classic fantasy roleplaying, look no further. Cairn 2E includes everything you need to get started with a minimum of setup and zero hassle. A simple 3-stat system and roll-under d20 resolution makes it familiar to old-school gamers and new players alike, marrying the best of the OSR and 5E mechanics.

The first edition of Cairn was a simple, 24-page Player's Guide that provided the basics of character creation and dice mechanics. For the second edition, we've greatly expanded upon and clarified the rules for players, starting with the backgrounds. Each character background now includes its own unique set of equipment, abilities, history, and relation to the world of Cairn. With 20 backgrounds and 36 possible ways to build each, that means over 700 different characters can be made before gameplay even begins. 

While Cairn 2E is bigger, bolder, and weirder than its predecessor, it remains as simple and easy to jump into. Character creation is a quick, four-step process: 

1) First, roll or choose a background from such creative possibilities as the Beast Handler or Fungal Forager.  2) Now, roll or choose from an array of tables to fill out your specialties, histories, and magical equipment.  3) Roll 3d6 to determine each of your three Attribute Scores—Strength, Dexterity, and Willpower—and 1d6 for your Hit Protection, or HP.  4) Lastly, you'll name your character, determine their age, and array them with a selection of traits and bonds to establish their place in the world.

A Beast Handler, Bonekeeper, Half-Witch, and Aurifex take a quick break from dungeon delving.

The Player's Guide is a 5.5" x 8.5" perfect bound softcover of approximately 92 pages.

In addition to the expanded Player's Guide, the Cairn 2E Boxed Set comes with a dedicated Warden’s Guide, which includes everything you’ll need to create, populate, and manage a game in the world of Cairn. Inside you’ll find: 

Advice and guides on designing and running a forestcrawl, pointcrawl, or dungeon delve

A bestiary of strange and foul creatures your players will encounter in the Woods and Roots

Spellbooks and relics, magical artifacts from a bygone age with their own strange powers and personalities

Rules for character advancement through personalized quests, downtime activities, and relationships with the people and creatures of the world

The world of Vald, Cairn’s first detailed setting and the perfect place to begin your adventure

And much more! 

With a few rolls of the dice, you can now generate entire sessions worth of content for adventures in the dark forests of The Woods, the stygian depths of the Roots, or even spruce up existing modules for a classic dungeoncrawl. Or perhaps your players would prefer to spend that session in town, following up on leads and training up their skills to better tackle the next leg of their quest. In the Warden’s Guide, you’ll find everything you need to really bring the world of Cairn to life. 

The Warden's Guide is a 5.5" x 8.5" perfect bound softcover of approximately 120 pages.

Trouble in Twin Lakes

Two weeks ago, Aldra, the beloved butcher of Isthmus Town, suddenly vanished without a trace. Some days later, a local teen reported seeing a man swallowed up by the earth near Deadmill. Others have also gone missing. Now, the townsfolk are left wondering: Who might be next? Trouble in Twin Lakes is the first in a brand new series of adventure for Cairn, set in and around the Twin Lakes area.  Trouble in Twin Lakes is a 5.5" x 8.5" saddle stitched zine of approximately 24 pages.

The Adventure Anthology

We've got THREE more adventures in the works as stretch goals. At a certain funding level, these three adventures will be collected and printed together as The Adventure Anthology, and included in each boxed set.

Digital mockups, final presentation may differ.

A first for Cairn and exclusive to this boxed set, the Warden's Screen is meant to inspire and inform in equal measure. It features a new, full-size illustration by Bruno Prosaiko on the front and tables galore on the back to help Wardens run their best game of Cairn ever! We're hard at work behind the scenes to determine the most relevant and useful information to put on this board, and our final design will be revealed in a future update.

The Warden's Screen contains five 5.5" x 8.5" panels made of thick gameboard, with art on the outside and reference text and tables on the inside.

Digital mockup, final presentation may differ.

The new Cairn 2E Character Sheet Pad feature art by Licopeo and are perfectly designed to show off your character's skills, stats, and assets. Backers at the Cairn 2E Boxed Set tier will get a whole pad of sheets that can be torn off as needed (useful in case of a sudden TPK).

Digital mockup, final presentation may differ

Collectors and enthusiasts will appreciate the robust box with unique art from acclaimed artist Bruno Prosaiko. Made of sturdy cardboard made to withstand years of intense gaming sessions, it'll contain everything you need to run a game of Cairn: just supply pencils, dice, and friends. 

The Cairn 2e box also includes a handy lift ribbon inside, to access all your books and papers easily without needing to upend the whole box! 

======================

Kickstarter campaign ends: Fri, April 26 2024 3:00 PM BST

Website: [Space Penguin Ink] [twitter] [instagram]

[seraphhy]

Sonic & Tarot: #0 - Sonic

This is the first entry in a miniseries where I will attribute a few Tarot cards to specific characters and explain my reasoning behind them. Maybe this post stemmed from Mild Annoyance at seeing Sonic assigned the King of Pentacles in the official deck released by Sega. At first, I was contemplating drawing a random card for the deck while thinking of a character--and since Sonic is one of my well-beloved characters, I have done spreads for him in the past--but to distill a meaning from 78 cards, the Major and Minor Arcana, proves to be too daunting of a task, and the Major Arcana are more impactful to the layperson, anyways.

[1] Do note that I am using a variant of the Rider Waite deck due to its ubiquity, its simplicity, and relative accessibility. For transparency, the deck that I am using is called The Change Tarot, illustrated by Xaviera Lopez; the imagery, compared to the Rider Waite deck, is almost a complete one-to-one, with a few minor changes. I will supplement each post with images of the original Rider Waite deck for accessibility, as the meanings remain unchanged for the most part.

[2] I just want to make it clear: I am not an expert. This is purely for fun. Your mileage may vary.

#1: Big Picture - The Fool

[ID: A young man stands on the edge of a cliffside against a warm yellow background. His arms are wide open, with a white rose held in his left open palm and a bindle held in the other, propped on his shoulder. A white dog is reared back on its hind legs at his feet.]

I know. You probably saw this coming.

The Fool is denoted by #0 - the number of Endless Possibility infinite potential. For all intents and purposes, The Fool is the very first card of the deck, and that makes sense; his carefree pose and expression imply he has the world at his feet, ready to take a leap of faith. He is eccentric, forward-thinking, radical, and prepared to embark on a journey with an almost blind trust in the universe. The Fool is succeeded by the more austere Magician, #1 of the Major Arcana (which is one of Shadow's cards, in my experience). It sounds familiar, doesn't it?

[ID: A collection of song lyrics. Top left - "Never fear the fall / When you leap without a net, you'll find / It won't be there all the time / So watch your step now, watch your step / Don't fall!" Middle left: "I won't even hesitate / A second left to alter fate" Middle: "Hold on to 'what-if'! Hold on to 'what if'!" Bottom middle: "Long as the voice inside me says 'Go', I will always keep on running / There is no way to stop me from going to the very top" Bottom: "This is my escape / I'm running through this world and I'm not looking back / And I know I can go / Where no one's ever gone and I'm not looking back"]

To outsiders, The Fool is precisely that - ruled by his blind faith and his thirst for adventure, he may unknowingly stumble into trouble, danger, and hardship. He may find himself jumping from The Tower if he is not careful.

More significantly, The Fool is governed by Uranus. Uranus is associated with freedom, airiness, revolution, and independence (one wouldn't be shocked to find that The Fool's element is air). Although Sonic's personality may have been ... sterilized over the years, his childhood (teenhood?) revolved around defeating Ivo, who, for all intents and purposes, is perhaps a not-so-covert metaphor for capitalism and industrialization. He is the oppositional force to Sonic's wildness and free-standing nature. Interestingly, Uranus also represents forward-thinking, innovation, and the (positive) future that can come from said innovation - one could argue Eggman is like the other-side of Uranus, its dark hemisphere, innovation in blind excess.

One more thing I wanted to add (courtesy of Tarot & Astrology by Corrine Kenner) because it blew my mind when I was making this post:

Uranus rules Aquarius, the sign of futuristic thinking, and the eleventh house of the zodiac, where astrologers look for information about social groups and idealistic causes. Like Aquarius, Uranus is associated with the lower legs, the ankles, and the circulatory system.

#2: Impact - The Tower

[ID: The Tower shows a tall tower perched on the top of a rocky mountain. Lightning strikes set the building alight, and two people leap from the windows, head first and arms outstretched. It is a scene of chaos and destruction.]

When I say impact, I really mean the effects of Sonic on others.

The Tower gets a bad rep, and for good reason - the imagery on it is striking and unsettling. Death, breakups, or loss of a job are all what we would colloquially call Tower moments: moments that irrevocably alter the course of our lives. The Tower, therefore, represents stability, structure, even if that structure is built on shaky ground - yet this card reminds us that nothing is permanent. As scary as that may sound, The Tower isn't all negative: it signifies a purging of false beliefs, interventions, tearing down concepts and things in our lives we thought were here to stay.

More significantly, The Tower is succeeded by The Star: What goes up must come down, or what falls will always rise again. Such is the harmony of the universe. Regardless, when you rise from the ashes of the fallen Tower, you're stronger, brighter, clarified.

This is definitely a take on Sonic that is more personal and less grounded in canon, but it feels so pertinent to me that I want to include it anyways. Sonic himself is life-changing - that's the whole conceit of his character. Sonic's role as The Tower is felt most palpably in Shadow's character saga: the appearance of Sonic heralded immense change in his life, from remembering his true purpose to emerging from the other side of his fall as stronger, more dignified, and certain of himself. The same can be argued for Surge, and if I wanted to reach, even Tails. What they all have in common is the change that Sonic inspired in them.

For the best application of Sonic as The Tower, look no further than Sonic & the Black Knight, wherein Sonic literally destroys the false kingdom Merlina built out of a feverish desperation to preserve her status quo:

[Picture 1 ID: Sonic asking Merlina, "What good is a world that goes on forever?!"

Picture 2 ID: Sonic charging at Merlina to attack, shouting, "No! And I don't want to [understand]!"]

The Tower is most closely associated with Mars/Aries, whose domains encompass strength, prowess, and impulsivity (among others). I would be remiss to exclude the fact that one of Mars' associations is sports and competition (Sonic Riders mention). Additionally, I'd argue that almost all of the Titan songs in Frontiers are very warlike in their intensity and genre, exemplifying Super Sonic as Sonic's ultimate weapon. All four songs seem to scream jump out of the Tower now!

[Pictured: Sonic threatening Surge with a Tower Moment, or the infamous "a bigger shame is what'll happen to the idiot that tries that" moment.]

Honorable Mention - The Chariot

[ID: The Chariot tarot card depicts a brave warrior standing upright in his chariot. His lower half is obscured, and the chariot is being driven by two sphinxes. In his hand he clutches a wand.]

I was hesitant to include this card, but I decided to for two reasons: 1) Sonic is a Cancer (at least if you acknowledge June 23 as his birthday), and I wanted to pay homage to that; and 2) there are aspects of The Chariot that resemble Sonic to me.

To put it simply, The Chariot is an adventurer, much like The Fool (in this instance, perhaps The Charioteer could be The Fool?). Unlike The Fool, though--and more akin to its ruling sign, Cancer--The Chariot houses its home on its back. In other words, where Sonic goes, home goes with, even if he never stays in one place for long. Furthermore, the advent of Cancer season is marked by the summer solstice; thus, The Chariot also symbolizes new beginnings, much like our adventurous Fool. The charioteer is ambitious and focused, commanding his body and his vessel forward through the world (as evidenced by the wand in his hand, which represents our spirit and unconscious). The charioteer knows what he wants, and he goes after it boldly and decisively.

This wasn't in my top two spots solely because The Chariot has a kind of austerity and severity that I don't quite associate with Sonic. While Sonic does have serious and grounded moments, I prefer the more airy and lackadaisical approach of The Fool, or, if we're characterizing Sonic by his impact on the cast and the world, the more intense and lightning-quick change of The Tower.

That concludes the first post in this little miniseries! These are the three cards I wish Sega would have associated with Sonic, as opposed to the Taurean and wizened King of Pentacles (which, in my opinion, is very antithetical to Sonic's nature). Both The Fool and The Tower remind me of Sonic in different aspects, and I think they embody his characteristics more accurately than what they went with. Alas, one can dream.

In my next post, we'll touch on Shadow. I have a lot to say about him ...

[fantasyfantasygames]

Monster Wranglers

Monster Wranglers, Pamphlet Play Press, 2009

It's Pokémon X Monster Rancher, with a standard 2d6+skill roll-over system. You know this setup. Most of you could write it yourself. Let me get to the interesting parts.

The corebook for Monster Wrangler is a 24-page center-staple production, at 5.5x8.5 size. Layout is nice. Short, compact, no wasted space but doesn't entirely eschew whitespace. Monsters peek in from the margins rather than taking up a lot of the page. It lays out the premise, gives you some stats, provides a map of your monster caravan loop, gives you some rules for monster catching, breeding, and battling, and provides 8 monsters.

Only 8 monsters? Well, only 8 in the corebook. There are about 300 total. Because there are 163 supplements for this game.

One hundred and sixty three. Across fifteen authors.

Each of them is a single-page tri-fold pamphlet. There are usually two monsters, one on the outside and one on the inside. Each one gets an illustration, base stats, leveling formulas, a few techniques, and notes about where they can be found. The techniques are all keyworded, so your older monsters can often use techs from later supplements.

Some of the pamphlets are just one monster - a jumbo-sized behemoth with more techniques and a piece of microfiction to go with them. These were generally my favorites. They just drip flavor.

Naturally, just like in most of these games, the monsters are not particularly well-balanced against each other. You'll see this issue show up again in an upcoming review about a game with 150 classes - only about 20 of these monsters are really viable, and you're going to spend your time catching them and ditching your old pals. They clearly tried to tweak the leveling formulas to account for this, but they didn't succeed. That goes double for multi-monster interactions, when one player's monster can buff another's in a repeating loop while a third shields them all.

The supplements got weirder and worse as time went on. The layout kind of degenerated, and there were too many variants on the same techniques. Occasionally you'd get one where it was clear that one author hadn't read another's pamphlet and there was no central database, because two techniques would end up with the same name and keywords but different effects. The original four artists moved on, and the ones they got to fill in had totally different styles. Still, each supplement was only a dollar, so you can't complain about the price. At least on an individual level. If you want to catch 'em all it starts looking a little steep, but if you just want to pick up the few that were good fighters and cool-looking, you could throw down ten dollars and get exactly what you want.

Notorious tongue-twister Pamphlet Play Press eventually got bought up by would-be gaming conglomerate Megagame, who went bankrupt in 2011 after finding out that there are dozens of dollars to be made in the TTRPG industry. All their stuff is out of print now.

[y-m4st3r-y]

This year I was so busy trying to get my life together that I think I used the Ipad I got for Procreate like... 3-4 times since gennuary. I'm always too tired or the clock runs faster than I can follow... so in the end I never find a moment to sit and enjoy my art. OTL

Some months ago I discovered that beautiful soul of an artist that is Senchatunes: she is a pianist and a composer, that mostly do arrangements of Sailor Moon OST on Youtube (but not only SM, she got more!! (๑>◡<๑)).

Here her Linktree: linktr.ee/Senchatunes

I fell in love with her whole playlist Σ>―(〃°ω°〃)♡→ and started listening to it on loop while rennovating my house.

As always, listening to Sailor Moon's music moves something deep inside my soul, so thanks to her music, slowly, these last days became less numb and then... a few weeks ago she released the arrangement of Sailor Neptune's image song: "Fate is so beautiful | Unmei wa Utsukushiku | 運命は美しく". Since that day my hands got restless, asking me to finally find some time at least for the thing I love the most: drawing that beautiful angel called Michiru. (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

So here is the illustration that her perfect arrangement inspired me! Hope you all will like it!

You MUST go and listen to it right now! HERE -> www.youtube.com/watch?v=EY2K8g… If you are a Sailor Moon fan, you'll love every single piece that she create! I promise. ( ´ ∀ `)ノ～ ♡

[soulmuppet]

We're a DAY away from launch so lets talk about what you can expect in AFTERBURN!

Orbital Blues is known to be a game of SAD SPACE COWBOYS. Your depressed & downtrodden Outlaws travel the galaxy trying to making ends meet. Afterburn is about LOVE, EXCITEMENT and ADRENALINE.

Inside our first hardcover expansion you'll find:

A sprawling sandbox adventure "RED SHIFT RIDERS" written by our very own @samsleney !

An in-world spaceship catalogue all beautifully illustrated by @tinywoodsman

A Storyteller's Guide with tips and advice on running a game of Orbital Blues.

RED SHIFT RIDERS

Set in the "Tennessee-Five" a richly-storied star system home to several major movers and shakers in the Outlaw Frontier. Where the famous ‘Red Shift’ run brings many spacers, racers, and credit-chasers to the system in hope of collecting its life-changing prize pool.

The Spaceship Handbook

Features a dozen new classes of characterful spaceships. You might use this to generate a Crew Ship or to add variance in the types of spaceships you might find in the Outlaw Galaxy. All completed with illustrations, in-world adverts and flavour text

BUT WAIT THERE IS MORE!!

Because we were jealous INSPIRED by The Estate by Mausritter we wanted to make our own boxset. But how to make it retro? Put it in a VHS Case! (yes still make those) Rogue Anthems will feature pamphlets from an amazing series of guest writers from across the RPG scene.

It'll feature the brilliant talents of @WriterBlades , @mytholder , @makapatag , @RatWaveGH and Connor Shearwood (also @JellyMuppet is writing one)

We want to expand Orbital Blues from a single book with a couple of adventures into a fully supported system with everything you need for years of adventuring in the Outlaw Galaxy.

So come follow along and maybe help your Sad Space Cowboys find happiness

[airfieldddrive]

Rupi's Poetry (Revisited)

[A Writer's Achievement]

Walking with purpose across her living room, lighting candles and turning the ceiling lights off

Sitting down with much to do, at peace with herself as reflected in her lovely brown eyes

The sound of trucks and cars on the 427 fades in the distant night time

She's changed, and everything is going to be all right

And it's Rupi, writing poetry in her room

Writing words of love and words that are true

Calmly looking closer with her eyes, a pleasurable delight she has found at the sight of her body

Outside in the Indian garden, the full moon is bright

More than 4 million women, children and men scroll across their phones, reading what Rupi wrote slowly

She walks back and forth with pen and paper held firmly in hand

...And it's Rupi thinking about poetry that she is going to write for you

She writes about pain and suffering and love

Most of what she writes about is true

Far from here

Only she rightfully decides, who she is to embrace in her arms

Feeling good again

For some

Most of the time

[She's A Twenty First Century Woman]

She gets emotional like the kind of scholar that she is who reads book after book like a charm

With eyes that are clear, there is much to digest

Knowing what you know can only take you higher

Putting you in all

She's here again

Here to perform

Putting you in all

Love and peace

Find yourself being released

She's an author, poet, illustrator, performer and artist

She's a twenty first century woman

There is much to what she writes

And all her followers

who have come from many different lifestyles and career paths

will have the time of their life

by buying a ticket and sitting down inside

Where more than a few

are seated

hand in hand

Mostly everyone's glad

She's a walking breathing miracle

She sells eternal sanctuary

She will entertain you

No matter what the temperature is outside

with Rupi inside

Everyone will feel warm

[Brampton And Malton And Toronto Heaven Sent]

We've got a feeling

there's a time to work

and a time to rest

Walking in our hometown fields

Fields that have seen generations of children

Children of the west

British descendants and the rest

Now a land of many brown skinned entrepreneurs

Standing still above ground

Safe and sound

Beating down any personal struggles

The day's chaos has begun, the workplace can be tense and ill at ease

Working hard to please...

And the chance to live in a wonderful world

without hectic commotion

Because love is where all of us need to be

and overtaken by that emotion

And even though everyone's in a good mood

Better to play it safe than sorry as usual

September has been a month to celebrate

And to have a slice of some delicious wedding cake

One of many lovely couple's have sealed their matrimonial fate

A time for celebration

and wedding hall dancing

here on earth before God

[Why Is She So Beautiful?]

Wandering through the forest

the conflicts of the world she has left

Climbing up a mountain of success

To a plateau of fresh, green grass

and tall trees full of life

Her young figure sits still

her reflection in the water she admires

that's natural

She's been published

and for that she's grateful

Salvador Dali's painting

"The Metamorphosis Of Narcissus" is beautiful

Such a brilliant painter

Narcissus blooms into a flower

Colourful and pleasing

Over and over

[Heydon's Farm]

If you go down to Heydon's Farm

You'll find a gathering of hovering Monarch butterflies

See forever eyes

that's not a surprise

Fox on the run

Over the road rocks by the jet

And there's the large lots

Memories of my mother there before

at the skating rink

where Michelle and her daughter are today

Just like everyone

Feeling both happy and sad

And of course there are good people in the world

Happy to be here

Championship drag racing

In a fast rush

Dealing with problems before the starting flag was raised

that had to be crushed

The moon and the prince

The prince was at the sticker factory

The sticker factory was beside the train tracks

The train tracks are still there amongst the enormous bustle

The bustle is what puts food on the table

and comfort all year round

Fly on a jet plane away

Sweet thing

Up on near the hikng trail

Places to go to and places you've been

You've changed into a fantastic human being

Yes

Happy as can be

And glorified as anyone can see

And fresh and clean in the morning

You've got everything

Always in

Never out

Wildwood wild things

throughout the summer blooming

in a roundabout

Changing seasons

Changes for one and all

Wish you were here

And some Hollywood stars are near

Time has come today

Time has come bringing change

Feel your body, it belongs to you and you alone

A gift from your mother and father

And from them you learn

what it is to work

during working hours

Earning your success

Making you feel tall

In my world

I hear a lot of lies

Up to here

listening to all these lies

Going with the flow

Rupi

In your world are there many that want you now?

And as you listen to your inner voice

To look for hidden doors, decorated floors and audience applause

Here for a good time

Everyone likes you a lot, they like what you've got

Your ancestral history can be felt and found throughout the land

Yes, deep in the land

And in the end, I heard before me, a clairvoyant having a spirit whisper in her head that in the end, we will find ourselves amongst those who all share similar interests

And that we'll all fit into our places

[Alpha Centauri Of The Constellation Centaurus]

With the stars of Centaurus shining bright around

A rocket ship moves slowly upward from its place underground

Rupi is strapped in, tilted back and coming up from beneath

Shimmering silver glitter around her head to below her knees

She lights up the fire in the skies

She knows she's doing well by the look in everybody's eyes

Her poetry is as rich as a sunrise

It ain't easy

Living in a painting and poetry fantasy

She is no longer alone

Made of hardy stock and thick to the bone

And the rocket engines roar

Roaring right down inside your soul

The stars of the constellation Centaurus shine alongside all of their moons

On stage, there's Rupi, reciting the words of a brand new poem

And it's Rupi, with her spoken words so true

At work and not lazy, thinking about the colour blue because it is such a fun thing to do

She's so far from here

Only she, and she alone rightfully decides who she is to receive in her loving arms

Rupi's back again, and everyone in the theatre will have a good time

[Poems]

Can't you feel your imagination get out of sight?

Pulsating colours, in the darkness of night

Like the galaxies that join after centuries, as the cycle of life expands and grows

She has come to your city and to a place that you call home

Rupi's standing shining in the sun, and she's reading with a loud voice

her favourite poems one by one

Poet of poets

Scholar of scholars

She has returned to read to the people, in theatre's close to their home

To make them feel glad that they've come, to listen to her reading her beautiful poems.

-Walter

October 18, 2019

Revisited and revised April 5, 2024

[mechanicallizard]

New illustration and a little text about AU related to it! A few posts ago I said that writing something here feels a bit uncomfortable for me, but I look at this illustation and feel like I should give some context (and also I still want to share my AU very much!!), so here we go:D

Now they are beautiful

One of the most important things about AU lore is the fact that William is absolutley obsessed with robots. Almost always he isn't able to build trusted and close relationship with people, but at the same time he humanizes machines, even household appliances, not to mention animatronics. Will is ready to spend all his free time with the robots he created, instead of communicating with real people.

The main reason why Henry becomes the only really important person for Afton, whom he truly wants to care about, is the fact that Emily has the same feelings for robots. Actually, after acquaintance they were firstly attached to a common robotic project and only after that to each other.

Also, fantasies about having metallic mechanisms instead of normal organs are incredibly attractive to Afton. When obsession culminates to insanity and it becomes hard for him to stay in touch with reality William has to make a lot of effords not to harm himself imagining robotic parts under skin and not to try putting wires and other parts into his body (however, sometimes he still does). Willliam is very afraid of death, but when he finds out that spinglock costumes can be deathly dangerous he can't stop thinking about dying in Springbonie as an opportunity to become one with him. And maybe only the fact that he consideres this death to be faschinating helps him to accept his new "afterlife" form later.

And of course not only himself he would prefer to see as a robot, but even more other people. This is actually the main motive for the murders, all except the Charlies' (or at least the reason why they look the way they do): he thinks children don't have completley formed personality, so the idea about merging their minds with animatronics is something he gets extremley exited about. He understands that this isn't real in the world where he exists, but the picture with robots performing with kids, who finally became right, stuffed inside, is too attractive for him.

William invents funtime animatronics as an attempt to create perfect family, that will replace wrong and irritating one he has. He keeps the number of members - there are four of them - but Elisabeth is the only one worthy of having new form. So, yeah, Circus Baby was made especially for her. Crying child could be in this list too, if he wasn't already dead. Obviously, there is no place for Mike (although he is a big part of Funtime animatronics story too). Maybe Ballora was designed for William's wife in some way (but this doesn't really makes sense to the AU, only as a respect for headcanon about this). However, in this story Will builds only prototypes for Funtimes, the final versions were made and presented to the public only after his death by Mike and Henry (and this is a big story for another post, so I won't go into details now).

However, the most important animatronics intended to particular persons in Afton's mind are the first ones, Springbonnie and Golden Freddy: for him and Henry.

PS The title refers to the "you'll be beautiful" episode in The Walten Files ( Episode 2 , 9:12 – 10:12). And even though the plot of the series hasn't got much in common with described part of the AU, this particular scene conveys atmosphere quite well (and also I just like it very much).