#you���re the one buffy

[fangirlforeversthings]

Something a little different today what about a character dialogue prompt:

The "Bro's"

Character "A" and character "B"

B: Bro its dark im scared can i hold your hand?

A: tf no?

A: >:(

B: :(

-A few moments later-

B holding onto A's hand

B *Now stepped up a little close in A's Personal space*

A: get out of my back

B: sorry but im scared bro :(

A: *shaking his head* no need to kiss my back this is enough *points to their hands clutched together*

A:...your hands are sweaty bro

B: i know bro

A:

A:if you tell anybody about this i'll shove my fist up your a*s

B: how about you take me on a date first?

A:....i hate you with every fiber of my being

B: i love you too bro

A: Well i hate you!

B: WELL I LOVE YOU!

A:WELL I HATE YOU!!

A: *sigh* f*ck off

B: f*ck me

A:

B:

A:😦

B:

A:what the fu...

B: sorry man impulse

A: seriously.

[invested-in-your-future]

"but it's realistic that they would breakup"

Not the point.

"But they had a lot of trauma the re-"

Also not the point.

"But at least she's a-"

Absolutely not the point.

Y'all trying to justify a narrative choice from within the narrative constraints.

That's a mistake.

Just like how many people never understood why so many would pick Bae ending, so many people just don't seem to get what the pairing meant overall.

Y'all realise what this pairing meant to people when it came out?

Despite the issues with the ending, the adoration and love the pairing has to this day has been earned by the game - it's inseparable from the franchise and it's reception.

It wasn't just another pairing. It wasn't just something that existed as bait or something within fanon or something developers never committed to.

Through the years plenty of ships get baited disingenuously while throwing the audience nothing but breadcrumbs - for example the disaster of Sherlock fandom, the mess with Supernatural, Teen Wolf, Voltron and so on. Or the way Blake/Yang in RWBY were the most blatant baiting that got no on-screen development(despite all the setup that show ignored for years) till the moment the show literally was getting axed and they wanted to milk LGBTQ+ community for money one last chance, skipping all the development to characterization characters deserve and attempting to bribe LGBTQ+ community with breadcrumbs at the last possible second.

And some shows would stumble into something important but fail to realise it and thus end up squashing it - ask Buffy fans about Tara and Willow or The 100 fans about clexa.

There were LGBTQ+ pairings in video games too but rarely they would be so front and center and very often would be playersexual.

This wasn't what Life is Strange ended up being.

Life Is Strange, at the very core is about queer experience - about fitting in, about making connections in the world that rejects you, about finding beauty in the life that hates and hurts you - Max and Chloe's relationship is the key to the entire game.

For some that meant letting go but for others? It gave the chance to fight a trope no matter what and to get an ending, albeit flawed, where a WLW pairing they liked can be happy and face the future together.

People lived through those two characters and their experiences finding something genuine to relate to.

Max and Chloe were that generation's Korra/Asami, Willow/Tara, etc.

Even DONTNOD recognised that in the end and treated it with respect.

Double Exposure might not pull a BYG outright but it sure does everything to kill the happy memories a fandom made about the pairing - to go back through every single ray of sunshine one ending got and subvert it, taint it, reject it.

Picking the Bae choice when playing Double Exposure is the Narrative constantly telling you how wrong you were to expect happiness when you picked the ending where the pairing is intact and how acshually it isn't intact!

It doesn't kill the characters but it sure goes an extra mile to kill what those characters MEAN to the audience.

Realism, plausibility and so on come after - it's what a writer does when they decide on a path. A writer doesn't just do something because it makes sense and is out of their control - they decide to do it and then make it make sense. Whether they succeed or not depends on how good a writer is.

Double Exposure isn't the story about a breakup. It isn't the story about two women dealing with their trauma.

Double Exposure treats an iconic pairing people cared about as a backstory element - nothing more.

Deck Nine expects the audience to accept what happened and move on to shiny new cast and possible new LIs.

The writers of Double Exposure are telling you - "look, this doesn't matter. Now here's a new mystery you can solve and new cast and look Max is back and you liked using her powers right? Use powers to do stuff."

To this developer team the core element of what made the franchise so important to its audience is nothing more than a leftover plot thread to "write around".

Because to these writers queer experience apparently starts and stops with searching for a relationship - someone being in a relationship that's not part of the story or someone being comfortable NOT being in a relationship at all just don't exist.

What Deck Nine writers seem to be doing is treating it as disposable or interchangeable/replaceable, while also inadvertently tainting whatever comes after with fandom rage.

The worst thing that can happen to a new character is being "the next love interest" - because people channel their frustrations towards the character (or in some worst cases, please don't do this, the actor).

Where there was an iconic part of the franchise Double Exposure, intentionally or not, sets up a toxic battle ground.

That's the point - treating LGBTQ+ audience as sales numbers, manipulating us, treating something that has been a formative experience to so many lives as disposable, or worse yet - malleable.

(And yes there's also a wider issue with Deck Nine and the working conditions there, misogyny, the nazi imagery and the rest but I don't think this is that disconnected from that? How they treat their audience and subject matter is a reflection of culture inside.)

[ghosty-writes-23]

(Re-Vamp) His Precious Doll. - Leon S Kennedy.

!TAGS!: NSFW Content, Porn with Plot, Yandere!Leon, !DARK CONTENT!, Dead Dove Do Not Eat, Stalking, Breaking & Entering, Past Trauma, Slight Somnophilia, Obsessive/Possessive Behavior, Angst, Panty Stealing, Surveillance, Blood, 3rd Person’s POV, Mental Instability, Drama, Gaslighting, Manipulation, Eating out, !WRAP IT, BEFORE YOU TAP IT! (Don’t be like Leon and y/n), Bareback sex, Riding, Creampie, Leon is a simp, !UNEDITED!

Pairing: Ghostface!Leon + Best!Friend!Fem!Reader

Rating: Mature

Summary: "Oh....Y/n, Y/n, Y/n; You Are In Terrible Danger." You where the object of his affections and he would do anything to have you even if it meant kidnapping you and taking you always from the ones you loved because he wanted to keep you safe.

Word Count: 12k

Ghosty's Notes: Hello my lovelies, I know I promised part.2 to Ghostface!Leon almost over a year ago and never got around to it. (*hangs head in shame*) but fear not as I have come back not only with a new Ghostface!Leon one-shot, but I have written both part.1 & part.2 and even added a part epilogues and updated the story in this post. This now has a story and full smut scenes, thank you so much to the people that have waited this long, I am so sorry it took this long to finally get around to it, so please enjoy this updated new & improved version of His precious Doll face with a new title.

Another Note: This was written with either RE2R!Leon or RE4R!Leon or InfiniteDarkness!Leon in mind.

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Thank you for all the support, it means alot❤️

-Ghosty :] ❤️🦝

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Part One: The Wolf In Sheep Clothing.

In the small town of Raccoon city people were getting ready for the Halloween celebration, you loved the spooky season, the cold weather as it gave you an excuse to stay inside all day wrapped up in blankets and watching movies. Tonight, there was Halloween parties going on all around your university, people getting dressed up in funny costumes, some girls going dressing up as bunnies in hopes to get with somebody that is good in bed for the night while boys went as superhero’s to show off their abs and trying to find themselves a girl for the night. you weren’t really into the partying side of Halloween night, or dealing with the hangover afterwards but you did enjoy giving candy to trick or treaters when you used to stay at your mom’s house.

But even with all of the festivities going on there was a small feeling of unease in the town that not even the celebration of the spooky season could hide, recently there has been a string of murders and missing people on campus and as much as people want to pretend it never happened, there is this constant feeling of needing to look behind you and not to travel alone at night, the only evidence the police have found at one of the crime scenes was a Ghostface mask, they don’t know if it from the actual murder for just a Halloween prop but the police are not taking my chances.

Your father was the chief of police at the Raccoon city police department, he was doing everything he could to try and get the person responsible for these crimes and put them behind bars but also to protect the people of this city, you saw how hard your dad worked and sometimes you wished he could take a break ad you could hang out like you used to when you where younger, but you knew that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon so they is why you always savoured the moments you did get with him.

Shaking your head you decided tonight you would be having a self-care night maybe paint your nails, do a face mask and watch buffy the vampire slayer since you found it on Netflix and you had stolen the password to Leon’s account, while you were getting everything set up you where scrolling thought your phone and a news article caught your eye.

It was about the recent body that was found in the lake near the bridge that was located just on the outskirts of town, it seemed the killer striked again and it was another guy you had seen around your university, you think you one or two classes with him and only talked to him a couple of times he seemed like a nice guy from what you could remember.

The article was calling out the police authorities saying they could be doing more, that every missing person, or body found was their fault since they haven’t caught the killer yet, but you couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

“It’s not like catching a killer is easy.” You mumble under your breath as you exit the article and locked your phone screen with a sigh. you knew your father was trying his best, both him and his department but how do you find somebody that seems to vanish into thin air, plus tonight will not be helping since the killer could be dressed up and in public and nobody would ever know, like a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

After a couple of minutes your phone buzzed, grabbing it you unlocked your screen and saw the text message was from your group chat with your friends Chris, Claire, Jill, Carlos, Luis, Ada and Leon. It was a group picture of them at the boys frat house party, they were all dressed up as various Halloween icons.

Leon was Ghostface, It was a tradition that you both dressed up as Ghostface, Chris was Michael Myers, Luis was Dracula, Carlos was a werewolf, The girls were pressed as the powerpuff girls, Jill was Blossom, Ada was buttercup and Claire was bubbles, they each looked adorable in their costumes.

Luis: You should have joined us; we miss you señorita.

Chris: Boo, you suck for not coming, Leon’s been pouting all night.

Leon: No, I haven’t.

Carlos: yes you have.

Claire: I agree with Carlos.

Jill: Me too.

Ada: I agree too.

Leon: Great now you guys are ganging up on me.*Leon has left the chat.*

Y/N: You guys need to stop bullying Leon.

Chris: Why it’s fun.

Y/n: Chris.

Chris: Fine.

Y/n: I’ll come to the next party.

Chris: You better, or I am dragging you out of your apartment over my shoulder.

Luis: You can’t threaten her like that.

Carlos: I would love to see that.

Y/n: Bring it on big boy.

With a small shake of your head, you laughed softly to yourself, this friend group was chaotic but you loved it all the same, you knew Chris wasn’t lying when he said he would come and drag you out of your apartment, he had done it once back in your first year of University.

You remember whining saying you wanted to stay in bed but Chris picked you up like a sack of potatoes and tossed you over his shoulder, then walked out of your dorm, but now you just accept your fate when you know he is coming over. When you clicked out of your group chat messages you saw you had a message from Leon.

Leon: I do wish you had come tonight, makes these parties more bearable.

Y/n: Sorry I wasn’t feeling it tonight, but I promise I’ll come to the next one, protect you from Chris’s teasing.

Leon: That would be much appreciated.

You and Leon had been best friend since you were in diapers, you basically grew up together, having been next door neighbors and your parents being best friends, you and Leon were always at each other’s houses, playing imaginary and make believe games, having sleepovers where you would stay up late watching movies and eat so much junk food your stomach’s would hurt, you went to the same schools and even got accepted into the same universities.

Leon was your bestest friend and your parent’s always used to joke that you and Leon would get married someday, you even had a little ‘wedding’ in your backyard with all of your stuffed toys as guests, your wedding ring was a strawberry flavoured ring pop while Leon’s was grape, you even still had the plastic bottom in your jewelry box.

But when Leon was 21 and you were 19 tragedy struck when Leon’s parents were killed in an car accident, there car was ran off a bridge into a lake, his mother died on blunt force trauma to the head, his father drowned trying to save his wife, you remembered the police officers coming to Leon’s apartment.

You were having your weekly movie night with the friend group, once they had told him the news Leon asked everybody to leave, but just as you were about to leave, Leon grabbed your wrist and pleaded for you not to leave him alone, that night was spend with Leon clinging to you and crying, he told you what the officers told him and your heart broke for him, you cried with him.

You promised him you would never leave him ever, and that you would always be there for him as you held him tightly against you, what you didn’t realise at the time was this would be the start of Leon’s every unhealthy obsession with you that you didn’t even know about.

Back in the present, you looked at the time and saw it was almost 12am, the streets were now quiet expect for the few occasional drunk collage student, you grabbed your TV remote and flicked off the TV causing it to now be completely dark in your living room, you stood up and wrapped your blanket around you as it was a cold night.

“Come on Oero its time for bed.” You say to your cat as it was stretching on the couch where you just were, she was snuggled up to your side purring softly, but she gives a soft meow and hopes off the couch following you up to your room upstairs.

As you push open your bedroom door you notice Oreo was looking behind her and down the stairs, almost as if she saw something or someone you didn’t. “come on cuddle butt its time for bed.” You say picking her up and giving her a cuddle and kisses all over her furry face.

She gave you a soft hiss, but she don’t try and move away from your affections and she was even purring against you, giving her head a final kiss you got into bed and she made her way to her spot on your bed, which was curling up right next to your chest, her little furry head resting on your neck, she liked being close even in her sleep.

“Nighty night Oreo.” You say as you flick off your bedside table lamp and nuzzle in your pillow getting comfortable, Oero gave you a oft meow back and moved until she got comfortable and soon fell asleep purring softly, and you two soon fell asleep completely unaware that Oero’s behavior before was a warning that somebody was in fact in your house and watching you sleep.

3rd person’s POV

Pushing open the door to your bedroom Leon creeped in quietly, his boots carefully stepping around your room as he carefully made his way to your bed, when he saw your figure sleeping peacefully his heart rate picked up causing him to start breathing heavily as his eyes roamed your figure like a starving animal looking at its next prey, carefully Leon reached behind his head and pulled off the cheap store brought mask, revealing his messy blonde hair that was slightly sticking to his forehead from sweat and blood, but not his blood but the blood of the man that had asked you out on a coffee date a couple weeks ago.

He didn’t even bother to clean up, he was lucky he was wearing mostly all black and being covered in blood doesn’t look suspicious this time of year, it was almost like the perfect cover. Carefully and quietly, he placed his bloody Ghostface mask on your bedside table and kneeled down beside your bed, a lovesick look on his face.

To Leon you were his whole entire world, his life started and ends with you, everything he did, every person he hurt or killed was to keep you safe, because when you love somebody you never want them to get hurt ever. He wanted to protect you from the cruelty of this world, he didn’t care if he had to get his hands dirty, or who’s blood he had to spill, if you kept that sweet, innocent and bright smile, he would let the world burn down just for you if you asked him too.

Taking off one of his bloody glove he gently ran his finger over the soft skin of your flesh, causing you to scrunch up at the sudden feeling, but you didn’t wake only making a soft noise that made Leon’s heart skip a beat in his chest, you were always so cute when you were sleeping, so blissfully and naively unaware of the danger you were in, Leon knew you trusted him completely and so blindly, he couldn’t help but feel it was foolish of you to be so trusting of him, especially after all the things he had done.

But that didn’t stop him from wanting you to be a part of him, for now and forever you were his wife after all in his eyes, that plastic ring pop bottom was his most prized possession and he planned on giving you a real ring and for you to take his last name as he wanted you to feel the same way he does about you, he wanted you to be equally obessed with him as he is with you, but he knows it will take time, he is a patient man especially when it is for his sweet doll.

Leon’s breath caught in his throat when he saw you stirring, you had turned over onto your stomach your cat Oreo was still snuggled up to you sleeping, when his eyes drifted back to you he saw your blanket had fallen off slightly giving him a sneak peek at your ass and the black lace panties there decorated them.

He knew that set all too well, he had brought them for you for your birthday a couple months ago because he saw you looking at them, he couldn’t help but imagine you wearing them just for him, giving him a little show and maybe even getting to touch you with them on, just the thought of being able to touch you was making him hard.

Letting out a heavy breath through his noise, Leon was frozen under you settled back into bed, once you had settled Leon had to resist the urge to kiss the small patch of skin near your hips that was peeking out from under your blanket because your oversized short had ridden up slightly. When he breathed in your sweet sent of vanilla and florals his eyes almost rolled to the back of his head as heat and desire ran through his body, you were always smelt so sweet, it was why he stole pieces of your clothing to take back to his apartment and bury his face in it, he stole things ranging from t-shirts and hoodies to your panties and when they didn’t smell like you anymore he would sneak them back into your apartment without you knowing and take something else.

He knew he was sick and perverted, but he couldn’t stop, he needed you like a normal person needs oxygen and if he couldn’t have you then nobody else would, you were his and have been since the day you appeared in his life like an angel, you were his and he was yours and he had to protect you even if it mean he put camera’s in your house without your permission, when you were visiting your parents, he always had to keep his eye on you like the tracker that was in the bracelet he had given you last year.

His blue eyes traced the curves of your body under the blanket, moving closer Leon made sure his movements didn’t disturb your peaceful slumber. His face was now inches from the back of your neck, his warm breath was hitting the back of your neck causing you to stir again since you were a very light sleeper, Leon didn’t want to wake you up, but he was so desperate to touch you to feel your soft flesh under his care callous hands.

Slowly he tugged your blanket down your legs revealing your soft and round ass. Leon made sure his touch was as light as feather as trailed his hand down your body until he would to the top of your panties, he could see a small wet patch forming causing the cotton panties stick to your slick folds.

Leon could feel his mouth go dry as his gulped slightly, licking his lips like a starving predatory looking down at it’s next meal, his pupils have been blown making also the blue of his eyes disappear as his breathing starts to pick up into soft pants as he could feel his pants start to tighten. Reaching up a callous hand he ran his middle finger up your clothed centre collecting some of your slick on his fingers, a soft groan left his lips when he felt how wet you were, it made him wonder what you were dreaming about, were you dreaming about him? Dreaming of the pleasure and ecstasy he could bring you if you would only let him.

Without hesitation Leon brought his finger to his mouth and eagerly suckled his finger, as soon as your slick touched his tounge and soft and pathetic whine left his lips, you tasted like heaven and sin mixed together, he could have came right there at just taste you, he wanted more god he craved more but it was far too risky, he wanted to watch you come undone on his tongue moaning his name in ecstasy as you wither under him and tug at his head.

Thinking for a second Leon moved to the bottom of your bed and carefully hooked his fingers into the side of your panties and carefully tugged then down your legs, keeping an eye on you in case you woke up, but luckily he pulled then down your smooth legs with ease, smiling at his small victory he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on your leg as a small thank you for your little gift.

Once your panties were off he brought them to his nose and inhaled deeply, your sweet scent filling his nose causing his eyes to roll back as a deep primal growl rumbled in his chest, you were so innocent and so clueless, knowing he needed to go soon Leon got off your bed and pulled your blanket up over your shoulder and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“Goodnight my sweet doll, I’ll see you again real soon, love you.” Leon whispered before he gave your head another kiss before grabbing his Ghostface mask off your bedside table and placed it over his head, he put your black panties in his pocket for safe keeping before he carefully walked out of your bedroom, giving you once last loving glance Leon smiled underneath his mask before slipping out of your bedroom and closing the door softly behind him.

After leaving your apartment Leon headed back to his own, his heart was full after seeing you he could rest easy knowing you were happy, safe and sound. When he arrived back at the shared frat house he could see drunk and passed out people everywhere, with a tried sigh Leon walked over the limp bodies before he headed to the frat house basement.

It was where most of the alcohol was keep and it had a finger print code which only Chris or Leon could access it so nothing would ever go missing, but it was also a great place to find things in plain sight, after Leon had done some work on the room, he made it sound proof and is currently covered in tarps.

Once inside the small room Leon tugged off his Ghostface mask while walking over to his computer, hitting the space bar the computer jumped to life as Leon sat down in his desk chair, logging in Leon waited for the computer to boot up before a series of camera screen’s filled the wide screen.

All the screen’s where of different angles of your apartment such as your bedroom, bathroom, living room and kitchen, spare bedroom, this was how Leon keep you safe at all times, reaching into his pocket he pulled back out your pair of black lacy panties, Leon’s blue eyes then flickered to the screen that was showing you sleeping peacefully in your bed, a happy smile on your face.

“Soon doll, you will be all mine, and I will be all yours for now and forever until death do us part.” Leon says with a crazed lovesick smile, there were even small hearts in his eyes before he buried his face in your panties and inhaled deeply again, this time now muffling his groans as your sweet scent filled up all his senses.

*The Following Morning.*

Y/n’s POV

You woke up the following morning well rested and refreshed for the first time in a long time, Oero had woken you up with soft meows for food, you gave her furry head a soft kiss before you stretched your arms over your head, causing you to make a soft whining noise as your back and shoulders popped back into place, running your fingers through your hair to move it out of your face a thought sudden occurred to you.

Reaching under your blanket you noised your panties were gone and you were sure you went to bed with them on. “odd, I must of kicked them off when I was asleep.” You thought before getting out of bed and doing your morning routine, but something in the back of your head was telling you something was wrong.

But you pushed that thought to the back of your head, today you decided since you had no classes and no work you where just going to laze around home, play with Oero for a bit maybe go out and get some lunch with the girls if they weren’t too hungover but you didn’t know yet, it was rare when you had free whole days like this so you were going to savour every moment of today.

After showering and putting some comfortable clothing on, you went to feed Oero and give her a morning cuddle before grabbing your phone and looking at the group chat, there were heaps of pictures from the party some of them doing shots, other pictures of the girls dancing and even some of Leon pouting which made you laugh, he had gone all out this year with his Ghostface Halloween costume even having fake blood on his mask and knife.

But even the knife looked real but you knew it was a prop it was the one he used every year. You hearted most of the pictures before your phone started to ring, it was your father you answered immediately wondering what he could need this early in the morning.

“Hey dad what’s up.” You say as you flopped onto the couch in your living room, you hoped this was a happy call, but you knew him calling you during his work hours wasn’t a good sign, it was either something really important or he needed your help with something. . “Hi honey, are you free this morning?” he asked, something was off with his tone, it sounded more formal almost like he was using his police chief voice. “Yeah I am free this morning, is something wrong?” you asked him suddenly becoming uneasy as a wave of anxiety rushed over you on why your dad was now calling you.

“Could you please come to the station, I need to ask you a few question.” Your dad said and you nodded your head. “yeah I’ll be there in 20.” You say to him, after saying goodbye and went and got dressed in some comfortable clothing before you grabbed your bag and gave Oero a goodbye kiss and headed out of your dorm and headed to the police station that was in town.

There was a knot forming in your stomach, what could your father possibly be needed to ask you that he couldn’t do over the phone, the feeling made you feel uneasy and anxious as you got on the public bus and headed into town.

Once the Raccoon city police station, the friendly and polite receptionist gave you a warm greeting and asked you how your morning was going, you said it was going okay and then asked her about her morning to be polite, she said her morning had been slow but her husband had brought her in coffee and breakfast before going into work which you thought was really sweet, after your small chat she told you go wait in the waiting room and that your father would be with you soon, you have her a thank you and headed to the waiting room for your father to come and get you, luckily you only needed to wait a couple of minutes before you saw the familiar dark greying hair of your father, he gave you a small smile as he came over and pulled you into a hug. “Dad what’s going on?” you asked him as your head rested on his shoulder.

“Not here kiddo.” Your father says before he guiding you a small but more private room, it was a small interview room with a two-way mirror and camera to record everything and a table and set of chairs in the middle of the room, there was even a hook in the table that would hold a person in handcuffs to the table, you could also see a file on the table, now your anxiety was through the roof, why had your father asked you to come here so early in the morning. “Dad what’s going on?” you asked him more firmly now; you wanted an answer.

“Well honey you know the case I have been working on?” your father started, and you nodded your head, it had been dubbed the Ghostface murders because of the mask they are assuming the killer wears when he kills his victims, you knew your father was following every lead that he could, but even in a small town leads can dry up or go cold very quickly or lead to nowhere.

You knew it was weighing a lot on your father because all he wanted to do was bring closure to the families and all those involved, to make everybody in this town feel safe again. “yeah but what has this got to do with me.” You asked him not a little confused, why he is asking you this question, does he think you have something to do with the murders?.

“Well, when I was following some leads, I started to notice a common theme.” He started before opening the folder and showed you a range of pictures, they where of you talking to each of the victims, some of you walking to class together, or hanging out or even at parties. “you think I did it?” you asked your father shocked that he would ever think such a thing, but he quickly shock his head. “no honey but I can’t ignore the facts that you are a common theme, that you seem to be connected to each victim.” You father says trying to ease your worries, but it only made them worse.

“I wouldn’t hurt anybody.” You say to your father, and he nods his head and places his hand on yours giving it a small squeeze. “I know Hun and I believe you, but until I figure out who is behind all of this and have them behind bars I don’t want you to be alone.” Your father says causing you to look at him. “What are proposing.” You asked him, you really didn’t want a 24-hour bodyguard it would get on your nerve and would make you feel like you are being watched.

“Maybe you could get a friend to stay over, what about one of the girls or maybe Leon? I just don’t want you staying in that dorm alone with that nutjob loose.” Your father said as he looked at you concerned. You didn’t want him to worry, and you knew either one of the girls or Leon would be okay to come and stay, you just hoped this wouldn’t be a permanent thing.

“I’ll talk to either one of the girls or Leon today.” You says trying to ease his stress, he gave you a smile before pulling you into a hug. “I just don’t want anything to happen to you sweetheart, I couldn’t live with myself if you ever got hurt.” Your father mumbles as he gave you a soft squeeze around your shoulders, you nodded your head and hugged him back, you knew if your father was the police chief then you would be safe no matter what and that put you at ease a little bit.

After spending the morning with your father and answering his questions as honestly as possible and him giving you a few lessons on self-defense and giving you your own pepper spray and showing you how to use it, you had texted Leon if he could come and pick you up, you didn’t feel like going on the bus after a very emotional packed morning, as you waited outside you heard the familiar rumble of Leon’s car before he turned around the corner and came up to the curb.

“Morning princess.” Leon says with a usual cheeky smile, you muster up a weak smile as you got into the front seat and did your seatbelt up. “Morning Lee.” You say as you relaxed back into the seat, it was comfortable and there was a soft melody of music playing in the car.

“You okay, you sound down?” Leon asked as he pulled out onto the road, you nodded your head as you closed your eyes, even though you were at the police station for a few hours you felt drained. “Yeah just a busy morning.” You tell him as you gave him a small smile, but you knew Leon wasn’t going to believe you.

“How about we go away to my parents lake cabin for the weekend?”  Leon suggests knowing it would cheer you up, maybe getting out of town for the weekend would be a good idea you loved going to his parents cabin, you both used to go there a lot as children, you always dreamed of living there and you could use the distraction.

“Okay I’ll drop you off at home so you can pack, and I’ll came back over in a few hours.” Leon says and you nodded your head, you would have to pack everything you would need such as clothing chargers, laptop for classes and makeup and medication as well as get Oero’s traveling crate, because you knew you couldn’t leave her home alone for a weekend and plus you knew Leon liked having her around and wouldn’t mind if she came on the trip. You were excited for this little weekend getaway, but what you didn’t know was you wouldn’t be leaving this weekend getaway….

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Part Two: A Mouse Caught In The Monsters Trap.

When you arrived at the Kennedy lake house you felt a wave of nostalgia wash over you, the cabin looked to be in perfect shape, it was two stories and had a balcony that was in front of the master bedroom, there was a doc above the water, on the deck was a hot pool and a BBQ, the memories you had here warmed your heart you almost felt as if you were in your own little paradise.

“its just like a remember.” You said as you closed your car door, Leon had gotten out as well and walked over to you. “I come here every couple of weeks and clean up and maintain the property.” Leon spoke as he looked down at you.

“you did a great job.” You say causing him to smile and even the tips of his ears to go slightly red. “How about you go looking around while I get the bags inside.” Leon suggested and before you could argue and say you wanted to help him, he had shooed you away to go and explore your only little piece of paradise, to which you just playfully rolled your eyes and left to start on a little adventure.

There were flowers blooming and ducks swimming in the lake, the sound of the wind rustling through the tree’s, you remembered playing hide and seek with Leon when you where younger around the forest that surrounded the back of the house, you had always seem to find you while you on the other hand could never find him.

His parents always used to call him your shadow because he followed you around like one, you thought maybe like a puppy, but he didn’t care what you called him, but as you grew up you found comfort in knowing Leon would always be there for you no matter what. You found a comfortable spot near the lake and sat down and just soaked in the peace and quiet, no loud cars or traffic, no daily life stresses, even the stress about the morning you had with your father started to melt away, even if you were only staying here for the weekend you really did wish you could stay here forever.

*Later That Night.*

Leon was preparing dinner in the kitchen while you where watching him from the couch, Oreo was happily sleeping on your lap as you gentle petted her. “So, what is on the menu tonight chef Kennedy.” You say with cheeky tone as you watched Leon prepare what looked a tomato sauce and some pasta, he was wearing a cute little apron and had clipped back his bangs to not let them fall in front of his face as he focusing.

“Well, I was thinking pasta and chicken tonight, since I wasn’t able to get a lot of groceries today, but I will go into town tomorrow and get some.” Leon says giving you a smile as he was tasting the sauce off a spoon then adding in some extra pepper, Leon’s mother had taught him how to cook ad he soaked that information up like a sponge, you always enjoyed Leon’s cooking. You took a sip of your wine, it was a white wine and tasted of grapes and expensive, you weren’t really a wine drinker, but this was delicious.

“Can’t wait.” You say with a grin after you swallowed your mouthful of drink, placing your glass down you carefully picked Oero up and placed her on a cushion on the couch before getting up and going over to you phone that was connected to the speaker, unlocking your phone you decided to put on some music to set a cozy vibe, you could see Leon smirking as he leaned against the counter as he waited for the sauce to simmer. You picked a soft melody.

“Dance with me.” You asked Leon as you held your hand out, he playfully rolled his eyes before taking off his apron and walking over to you. “You know I have two left feet.” He tells you as he takes your hand and gave you a little twirl. “then I’ll teach you.” You say with a little giggle as you intertwined your fingers together and gently swayed around the living room.

“see your dancing.” You smile at him as you danced around slightly to the music. “only with your help.” Leon tries to brush you off before he gave you another twirl expect this time you decided to wrap your arms around his neck, while his hands went around your waist.

“Thanks for today.” You say as you looked up at him he looked down at you gave you a small smile. “you’re welcome, I’m just happy I could make you smile again.” Leon says causing a small blush to colour your cheeks, and this caused him to grin now. “you’re such a sap.” You say with a laugh as you both were still gently swaying to the music. “Only for you doll.” He says in a cheeky tone that makes you playfully roll your eyes but there was a smile on your face as you laughed at his dumb joke.

But as you slowly stopped laughing you looked into his blue eyes, and for the first time you felt your heart racing in your chest and before you knew it you softly kissed him, but as soon as you realized what you were doing you went eyes and quickly pulled away. “I’m so sorry.” You quickly apologized for your actions you couldn’t believe you had just done that, it must be the wine making you feel bolder than you usually are. But when you looked at Leon he didn’t look angry but a little surprised.

“Don’t be sorry Y/n.” Leon say clearing his throat before his hand gently landed on your face and he carefully pulled your face back to his and reconnected your lips in a soft and sweet kiss, you could still taste the tanginess of the tomato sauce he had tasted before, you slowly and hesitantly kissed him back but as you did you felt him pull you closer, this felt different from any kiss you had experience with a guy before, maybe it was because it was your best friend, but something about this felt right.

As your eyes fluttered closed Leon picked you up with ease, your legs wrapping around his waist as he started making his way upstairs to the master bedroom. Once inside the bedroom Leon kicked the door closed and gently tossed you onto the bed, a soft giggle leave your lips as you watched him walk over to you both were breathing heavily.

“You sure this is a good idea?” he asked you as he hovered over you, his arms either side of your head you could see his muscles through his shirt and it was making you wet, you knew this was either a really good idea or a really bad idea but at this moment your brain is clouded with lust making you not thing straight.

“You sure this is a good idea?” he asked you as he hovered over you, his arms either side of your head you could see his muscles through his shirt, he reached one hand up and moved some hair out of your face making your heart flutter slightly at the gentle gesture.

“we can stop if this makes you feel uncomfortable and pretend this never happened.” Leon says softly, when you looked into his baby blue eyes you could see nothing but love and warmth, were you really going to ruin your friendship for one night of passion, “Fuck it.” You say before pulling him down to you and kissing him.

The kiss was soft and sweet at first but slowly it grew more needy and desperate, Leon had tugged off his shirt and threw it somewhere in the room, you couldn’t but help admire his body, he was fit but not overly fit, you bit your bottom lip before you leaned up and removed your own shirt and tossed it onto the ground, You could see Leon’s pupil’s get bigger when he saw more of your bare skin, it made you feel a little more confident in your appearance.

“God you are beautiful.” Leon mumbled causing a small blush to come onto your cheeks, nobody had ever called you beautiful in such an intimate moment, maybe hot, sexy or cute but never beautiful.

You where gently pressed back onto the bed as Leon started to gently kiss your neck and his hand trailed down your body, softy squeezing your hips and your thighs, you felt as if your body was on fire with the heat the was coursing through your veins, As Leon kissed down your neck he unclipped your bra and carefully tugged it off before taking one of your nipple into his mouth and started a suckle ever so slightly, this caused you to slightly buck your hips as your breath hitched, his finger softly teased your other nipple and you squeezed your thighs together as you felt yourself becoming wet. “Leon.” You softly moan his name, causing him to look up at you with an almost love drunk look and he had barley done anything, only teasing the small bud with his mouth until it hardened into peaks. “stop teasing me.” You say with an embarrassing whine, a blush colors your cheeks.

Leon nodded his head before his lips started to travel lower until they got to the top of your shorts, slowly unbutton them and took then off and placed gentle kisses down your hips and lightly nipping at the thin waistband of your panties, you tried to close your legs but Leon just softly chuckled and placed soft kisses on your thighs, down your knees and legs before he gently pulled them open and placed himself between your legs.

You couldn’t believe you were actually going to do this, you were really going to sleep with your best friend, you didn’t know if it was the alcohol or that you might actually have feelings for Leon, he was always there when you needed him no matter the time of day or night, he always protected you and made you feel safe and cared for, maybe the reason it never worked out with anybody was because you were meant to be with Leon, but your thoughts are too cut off when you feel Leon’s kissing and gently biting your inner thigh.

“Distracted Doll?” Leon asks there is a small tease in his voice, but you can also hear the warmth and affection. “Sorry.” You mumble as you looked down at him, his eyes were watching you as if he was watching your ever reaction, Leon just chuckled softly against your inner thigh as he pulled his mouth away with a soft pop, there were a few love bites and bite marks on your inner thigh.

“Can I?” Leon asks as his eyes drift down to your panties which you knew soaked by now you could feel yourself clenching around nothing. You nodded your head knowing if you spoke it would probley come out in a pant more then words.

With your consent and permission Leon eagerly pulled your panties down your smooth legs and balled them up in his hand before bringing them to his nose and inhaling deeply, his eyes almost rolling back as your scent filled his senses, you had never seen something so erotic and sensual before, and you could see him hardening in his sweatpants and you bit your lip.

Soon he tossed your panties onto the ground with the rest of your clothes and looked at your pussy with a hungry daze as he licked his lips.

“Your already so wet princess.” Leon says before he reaches out and runs a single finger down from your pubic area, circles it around your clit earning him a few moans before sliding down to your entrance and slightly dipping inside to collect some slick before he brought the finger up to his mouth and cleaned his finger and in that moment you thought he came just from the taste of you.

Soon Leon spread your thighs widely apart then ducked his head between them before dragging his tongue along your slit in a long slow lick groaning at the taste before he started to devour you like a starving man and you were his first ever meal.

“Gonna make you feel so good doll, gonna make you mine.” Leon promised as teased your clit with his tongue as his eyes looked up at you though his lashes, sweet moans were falling from your lips like a song, no man had ever made you feel this good before, you could almost feel your eyes rolling to the back of your eyes and your toes curling, you felt Leon react two fingers up and used them to spread you even more, the blush on your face was burning bright red, your hands where gripping the blanket under you, all you could focus on was the pleasure Leon was bring you at this moment, it was almost enough to make you see stars.

“Fuck Leon.” You cried out as you felt your thighs begin to tremble around his head, you knew you weren’t going to last long under his skillful tongue, he didn’t even need to use his fingers, you feel Leon grinning against your pussy at the sounds you were making and how your body as reacting to his touch, looking down you could see the look of satisfaction evident in his expression, but soon he redoubled his effort with much more enthusiasm and lust.

“Your getting close Y/n aren’t you, cum for me please.” Leon softly pleaded against your pussy, you could see his face was coated in your slick and juices, and when Leon gently nibbled on your clit that sent you over the edge and you came with a loud cry as your thighs trembled around his head. As you came down from your high you could hear Leon’s softly slurping against you before you gently pushed his head away since you were now a little sensitive.

When Leon pulled away he was grinning like a Cheshire cat as he licked his lips, you felt your cheeks heat p but Leon just gave you a small wink. “Do you want to keep going?” he asked as he ran his fingers though his sweaty blonde hair. You nodded your head and went to touch his sweatpants before he grabbed your wrists.

“tonight is about you not me, we can leave that for next time.” Leon says making you pout slightly you wanted to make him feel as good as he made you feel before, but you nod your head and wonder what he has planned next.

“do you want to top, or do you want me too?” Leon asked as he slipped his sweatpants off, you could see the wet patch on his underwear, you thought for a second. “I’ll top.” You say before moving so Leon can lay down on the bed, it had been a while since you last topped somebody, Leon gave you a smile before laying down on the bed and help guide you to his lap, soon Leon reached over to the bedside table to grab a condom, but you decided to stop him, Leon looked at you wide eyed for a few seconds.

“Are you sure?” he asked you and you nodded. “I’m on the pill and my period isn’t due until next month.” You say with a small blush, you could also see a small blush on Leon’s face as well. “Only if your sure.” He says and you nod your head before you reached down and pushed his underwear down slightly before taking out his harden cock.

It was heavy in your hand and hot, precum was oozing from the head as it twitched ever so slightly, moving your hips back you line it up with your entrance before slowly sinking down, his cock stretching you slightly causing soft and grunts to leave both of your lips.

“So, fucking tight.” Leon cursed and you tried not to clench around him, but it just felt too good, Leon’s hand came up to your hips, helping to steady you and guide your movements on his lap, his eyes were dark with lust and adoration as his eyes roamed your figure as you bounced on him. “Oh y/n.” Leon moaned your name as his eyes fluttered shut and you could feel his hands slightly tighten on your hips.

You were moaning as well heavy pants and soft whines of pleasure were leaving your lips as you rode him, you felt as if you were on cloud nine, moving forward you placed your hands on his chest to steady yourself before you started to bounce slightly harder, at this pace he was perfectly hitting your sweet spot causing your toes to curl and soft squeals of delight to leave your lips, you could feel Leon start to move his hips in time with yours and it was making your eyes almost roll to the back of your head.

“Keeping moving for me sweetheart.” Leon grunts out as your body started to tremble again, you felt as if your brain was melting and all your throughs were getting hazy, all you could focus on was the pleasure Leon was giving you and you were giving him, in this moment it felt as if you two were the only people in the world.

“Leon.” You moaned out his name, you knew you were close, you could feel the knot forming in your stomach, it was getting tighter and tighter, Leon’s eyes opened, and he looked up at you, his body was covered in a thin layer of sweat, his blonde hair was sticking to his forehead, just as your body was sweaty and you could feel your hair sticking to your body.

“Say your mine.” Leon groaned against you, his grip on your hips was almost bruising but the mix of pain and pleasure was addiction, and at the moment you didn’t think about what you were saying or the consequences it would have later on. “I-I.” you tried to say but was cut off when a moan left your lips. “say your mine and then you can cum.” Leon says as he started to thrust up into you causing squeals to leave your lips.

“I’m yours.” You cry out as your whole body was trembling. “good girl, now cum for me.” Leon groaned out and as if you had been hit with a title wave you came with a choked by as you arched your back, soon Leon’s followed with a cry of your name, and you could feel him filling you up.

As the hazy pleasure subsided you fell onto Leon with a soft thud, you both were breathing heavily and covered in sweat, but there was no doubt you were both satisfied. When the trembling finally stopped Leon turned you over and laid you on the other side of the bed, before slowly pulled out with a wet pop. Now you were more than a little sensitive. “I’ll go get a warm cloth from the bathroom to clean the mess up.” Leon says and you nod your head. “yeah that might be a good idea because my legs are like jelly.” You say causing you both to laugh as Leon got out of bed and headed to the bathroom, you watched his bare butt disappear before you relaxed into the bed. For the first time in a long time, you felt really good maybe this would be the start of something good.

*The Following Morning*

You could feel the morning sun gently warm your body as you slowly woke up from your peaceful slumber, you ran your fingers through your hair before you spotted a note on your bedside table. “Gone to get groceries and other things, I’ll be back early this afternoon, if you need anything text me. – Leon.” The note say and there was even a few x’s on the note, it was sweet.

Placing the note down you couldn’t help the smile that came onto your face as you remembered last night, nobody had ever touched you like that, it was almost as if Leon knew your body like the back of his hand.

Running your fingers though your messy hair you decided to get out of bed, and grabbed one of Leon’s shirts off the floor and slipped it on as you headed to the kitchen downstairs to feed Oreo and make your morning coffee, Oero followed closely behind you and rubbed herself on your legs as if she was saying good morning to you, quickly you got her some food and water before turning on the kettle and grabbing your phone to see what’s going on the group chat, only to see nothing.

“odd.” You thought, the group chat is always lively, and you hadn’t seen any new messages on it since yesterday, usually Chris is talking about something or Claire and Jill are sending meme’s to each other but there was nothing, suddenly that feeling of unease from yesterday washed over you again, something just isn’t right but you can’t seem to put your finger on it, and slowly you started to doubt if coming on this little vacation with Leon was such a good idea.

Later On, In the Day Leon has still yet to return to the Lakehouse, but you have been keeping yourself entertained by reading some books you found, playing with Oreo and watching some TV, it was an oddly quiet morning and midafternoon, you did check your phone every now and then to see if there was anything new in the group chat but there was nothing, you went to go and text Claire to see if something had happened but to your shock his number was gone from your phone, along with most of your contacts.

“What the hell.” You thought as you tried to find the rest of your contacts but all you could see was Leon’s number and a few other numbers. Maybe your phone was malfunctioning, but it has never done this before you had only got this phone a couple months ago, sighing softly you tossed your phone onto the couch, just wondering what the hell was going on.

When Leon finally returned back you helped him get the shopping out of the trunk of his car, he had brought a lot of food for both you and Oreo, some toys for your kitty and even some roses for you that made your heart skip a beat, but it still didn’t cover the unease you felt in the pit of your stomach. “Leon do you know anything about the contacts on my phone going missing?” you asked him as you were grabbing the last bags of shopping out of the trunk. “No idea princess.” Leon says as he takes the bags from you, but as he did something in his trunk caught your eye, it as a duffle bag, you didn’t know why but your stomach was tell you to not open it.

“maybe you should get a new phone?” Leon suggests as he closes the trunk to his car, snapping you out of your thoughts you have him an awkward laugh at his suggestion. “Maybe.” You say before you headed inside, for some reason your head was screaming at you to look in the duffle bag were as your stomach was telling you not too.

*Later that afternoon.*

While Leon was busy going for a swim in the lake, you took this opportunity to go into the trunk of his car, you were just hoping it was just full of clothing and that you where just overthinking things, carefully you opened up the car trunk and grabbed the duffle bag, it was heavy and slowly you undid the zipper, and you saw Leon’s bloody Halloween Ghostface costume mask and blade. “I’m overthinking it.” You say as you took a little at the mask, but it only took a few seconds for you to realise that it wasn’t fact blood on his mask but real blood.

“Oh my god.” You say as the realization hit you causing you to drop the mask, but suddenly you felt a presence behind you, the one that used to bring you happiness and safety now made you feel fear and ice cold. “Well, aren’t you a curious little doll.” Leon’s voice spoke but his voice was deeper than it usually is, a soft squeak left your lips. “It’s you, you’re the Ghostface Murderer.��� You managed to say as your body begins to tremble in fear, you where here alone with a murderer, what was his plan for you, was he playing you this whole time.

“Guilty, but you have trust me I did this to protect you, those men would have hurt you and used you but not me.” Leon says before turning you around and cupping your cheek in his hand, his callous thumb running over the soft flesh, you were lost for words your best friend a man you trusted was a killer, you had slept with a killer, nausea started to fill your stomach, and you felt as if you wanted to vomit. “Your delusional, how could you hurt innocent people Leon.” You choked out as you pushed his hand away harshly. “they were not innocent.” Leon says with a growl under his breath, his face going hard for a second.

“You’re a monster.” You snapped at him as you tried to leave, but he grabbed your wrist and pulled you to him. “no, I’m not, I’m just protecting the woman I love even if she doesn’t see it.” Leon says as he tightens his grip on your wrist. “Leon this isn’t love, this is obsession, this isn’t healthy.” You say to him before whimpering slightly at the grip on your wrist.

“You are not leaving me.” Leon tell you firmly before he pulls you to him and wraps his arms around you. “you promised to be my wife remember when we where younger, I plan on keeping you to that promise.” Leon says with a grin that made it felt as if you whole world had been shattered. You were trapped here with a murderer that was obessed with you.

It had been 2 weeks since you had gone missing, the Lakehouse that once held happy memories of you and your childhood best friend Leon, was now your prison that you couldn’t escape no matter how hard you tried, you sat on the couch curled up into a ball as you petted Oero you were glad Leon hasn’t hurt her, you knew you needed to get out of here but you knew it wasn’t going to happen easily Leon barley left you alone and always seemed to know where you were.

Over the months Leon’s confessed to everything from hiding camera’s in your house to the murders and even to blocking all the contacts on your phone. He was no longer the man you knew and cared about, The sweet and loving Leon was gone and was replaced with a person you barley recognized.

“Honey I’m home.” Leon called out as he walked in front the front door holding some shopping bags, you weren’t aloud to go outside unless he was supervising you, but even when he wasn’t home you knew he was watching you from the camera’s that had been placed throughout the house.

You didn’t say anything, and this caused Leon to frown slightly, before he waked over to you and gently grabbed your chin in between his fingers and tugged your face to meet his. “I said honey I’m home.” He says in a sweet tone, but you knew it was anything but sweet. “Welcome home dear.” You say monotone as you looked at him.

Your eyes had lost there usual spark they used to have; it was almost like you had given up on life because how were you meant to live your life when your trapped in what felt like a prison. Leon smiled at you and gave your lips a soft kiss, you didn’t kiss back before he went over to his bags and pulled out what looked like a piece of paper.

“Look what I found today.” He says with what can only be described as a giddy smile and laugh before being opened the piece of paper, it was a missing person’s poster with your name and picture on it, there was even a reward on it if you were found.

When you first see the poster it made tears spring to your eyes, knowing you were never going to see your loved ones again, that they were out there looking for you hoping that you would come home safe and sound, but you weren’t you knew Leon wouldn’t let you go that easily, you gave up trying to reason with him when you spent the first week of your captivity trying to convince him to let you go and you wouldn’t tell anybody what happened and you wouldn’t report him to the police.

But all he said was why would he let you go, he loved you and knew with some time here and some tender love and care you would love him the same way he loved you he promised you. But all you felt was dread, hopelessness and sadness. You just hoped by some miracle somebody would either find you or come looking for you before it was too late.

*2 Weeks Later.*

A month had passed since Leon had kidnapped you, nobody had come looking for you and you had fully given up now, the only positive thing you had in your life right now was Oero, who happily purred against you and wouldn’t leave your side, it was almost like she knew something was wrong and didn’t want to leave you alone, Leon had gone out again you didn’t know for what this time, but you knew he would bring back another missing persons poster of yours and show you that your father was increasing the reward, it almost seemed like a game to him.

You were now Leon’s wife, not officially but he had put a wedding band on your finger, or more like forced it, he called you wifey and darling and all sorts of cute pet names that if it was anybody else would make you feel happiness or even warm and fuzzy, but all you feel is sickness and cold wash over you whenever he says your name or pet name he came up with.

It was late afternoon when you heard a car pull up, it seemed Leon was home but then you heard heavy footsteps and what sounded like multiple voices, did Leon bring back a guest? You thought as you suddenly went to hide. But soon you heard your name being called out. “Y/N!” Chris called out and you felt tears in your eyes, then you heard knocking on the door. “Y/n it’s me Claire can you open the door.” Claire sweet voice said, and you felt tears in your eyes, they had come for you ere finally going to be taken from this nightmare. “I can’t, Leon has the key to the door.” You choked out as you wiped the tears that were running down your cheeks.

“Are you okay, your not hurt?” you heard Luis causing more tears of joy to roll down your cheeks. “not besides a few bruises you say before you heard Chris’s voice again. “Y/n back away from the door, I’m going to boot it down.” Chris warns, you pick Oreo up and went and hid in front of the couch, encase some of the door pieces came flying, at first he wasn’t successful you could hear him cursing outside before he asked Luis and Carlos to help him and with the men’s combined weight on the door came flying open, the lock and deadbolt chain snapping in the process.

As the door swung open you stood up and looked at the group walked in, Claire had tears in her eyes as she ran towards you and hugged you tightly, as did Jill and even Ada, you hugged the girls tightly before you began to sob into there arms. “we finally found you.” Jill says cupping your cheeks in her hands, she used her thumb to wipe your tears that were running down your cheeks. “Yeah you did.” You say smiling before the girls moved away and now it was time the boys gave you a hug, Chris hugged you tightly almost like a bear, then it was Luis who cried a few tears and gave you a squeeze, Carlos gave you a hug and ruffled your hair he was glad to see you were alright.

But as happy of a reunion this was you knew you had limited time. “We have to get out of here, Leon he is the Ghostface murder.” You says and they all nod there heads. “We know Luis found his computer hide out in the frat house basement, that was how we found you we used the tracker in your bracelet.” Ada explained and you nodded and you kind of felt grateful you didn’t take it off.

“We will get her stuff, Claire can you and the others make sure Y/n gets in the car okay.” Chris asks knowing we don’t have a lot of time before Leon arrives. Claire nodded as she pulled away from you. “I’ll take her in my car.” Claire says giving Chris a nod before the boys started going around the house to get yours and Oero’s stuff.

“Oero come here girl.” You call out holding out your arms, Oero came running into your arms and did a small leap, you caught her swiftly before you were guided outside and towards Claire’s car, once inside the back you had Ada on one side of you with Jill on the other, Claire was in the front in the drivers seat. You were finally free from this hellish nightmare, but just as happiness started to fill your body you heard another car pulling in, it was one you were all too familiar with, a soft whimper left your lips as Leon stepped out of his car, his face was hard and cold as he saw the front door had been busted down.

“What the fuck do you think your doing.” Leon yelled when he saw Chris walking out with what looked like your bag of clothing. “getting Y/n away from you.” Chris says as he walked closer to Leon, he was taller and bigger then Leon, but you didn’t know what Leon was capable of and you didn’t want to find out. Leon let out a humorless laugh before he looked up at the older male, the look on his face was deranged and psychotic. “you really think I’m going to let you take her from me.” Leon says before pulling out a knife from his back pocket.

“CLAIRE GO NOW!!.” Chris yelled, she didn’t need to be told twice, she turned on the car and stepped on the gas and you guys went flying down the long dirt road, worry filled your body as you could see Chris and Leon fighting in the rearview mirror. “He will be okay, I promise you.” Jill tried to reassure you as she rubbed your shoulder, you didn’t want Chris to get hurt because of you he was just trying to save and protect you. You nodded your head trying to believe her words but in the back of your mind you could help but feel dread.

*4 Hours Later*

You girls were in a random hotel, Claire thought it would be best to hide out until they heard some news from the boys, you had showered and changed into some spare clothes that Claire had, while you were in the shower you finally got the ‘wedding ring’ Leon had forcibly put on your finger off, there was a little blood but nothing a band aid can’t fix.

Stepping out of the bathroom you saw Jill hang up her phone, Claire was watching TV while sitting on the end of the bed and you could see Ada was petting Oero who was peacefully sleeping on her lap. “That was Chris, Leon’s been arrested, and your dad is on his way to pick you up.” Jill says and for the first time in what felt like forever you felt relief wash over you, you tried to not cry again by taking some deep breaths but there was a massive smile on your face, you were finally going home.

Your father and the boys had turned up a couple hours later, there were more tears as your father embraced you and said you were never leaving his sight again, at this point you wouldn’t really mind that, you thanked all of your friends and gave them each a meaningful hug and promised to get a new cell phone and number so you could continue to talk on the group chat.

You made plans that you were going to move back in with your father just until your University year was over and maybe do some traveling with the girls, get out of raccoon city for a little bit and go and live your life, Knowing that Leon was now in the custody of the police and you would never see him again….

Y/n’s Epilogue.

It has been 2 years since the Ghostface murders and the incident with Leon, Y/n had been living her life to the fullest, she went traveling with the Jill, Ada and Claire all over the world, she had even dated a few people but nothing too serious, she had been going to therapy regularly to help with the nightmares and trauma she had faced with everything and slowly she was healing slowly but surely, and she was even dating somebody new but this person was a little more closer to home.

“and how are my two favourite girls this morning.” Chris says as he walks into the kitchen in just his boxers, Oero gave him a happy meow and rubbed her face on his arms while purring, she had really taken a liking to Chris and like to knead his chest or bicep. “Such a sweetheart.” You say biting back a smile as Chris wraps his arms around your waist and placing a soft kiss on your bare shoulder as you were wearing only one of his shirts and some shorts underneath.

“Only for you two.” Chris says making you playfully roll your eyes as you flipped a piece of bacon in the fry pan that was placed on the stove. “Let me.” Chris says before he picks you up with ease and places you on the counter and takes the tongs from your hand.

“please don’t burn it like last time.” You say with a playful tease and he just rolls his eyes pretending to be annoyed, never in your wildest dreams did you ever think you would be this happy after everything, but even Tho you might go though shit in life it does get better if you just give it time, you will be happy…

Leon’s Epilogue.

An older doctor walked into the sterile hospital room that was covered in drawings of a woman, somewhere drawing in pen or pencil while other drawings were done in blood, a young man laid on the bed staring up at the roof, his blue eyes were dull and lifeless as if all the life had been sucked out of them, there where bandages on his arms from either him attacking other doctors or harming himself, His name was Leon Kennedy.

His reason for being at Raccoon city asylum for the criminally insane was because he murdered men for the woman he loved. Y/n was her name, she was the most beautiful woman Leon had ever laid his eyes on, they had grown up together and Leon swore he would always protect her and love her, but after a tragic accident that left Leon all alone, he started to develop an unhealthy obsession with Y/n, this would end with deadly consequences.

“Good Morning Leon.” The doctor says as he closed the door behind him, he was constantly under the supervision of the doctors here. Leon didn’t even look at the doctor just constantly looking at the roof as if his thoughts were 1000’s of miles away. “Leon I want you to tell me about y/n.” the doctor said, and this caused a small reaction on the young man’s face, a smile on his lips as he thought of you, your smile, your laugh, the sound of your voice when you said his name. “She is the love of my life.” Leon says with a lovesick look in his eyes.

“She must be an amazing woman.” The doctor says happy he is finally having a conversation with the young man; Leon turns his head and looks at the door. “she is and I plan on making her mine once again.” Leon says as a deranged smile came onto his face, as he looked at the drawings on the wall. “I will have her again.” Leon laughs delusionally as the doctor backed out of the door and closed the door sealing it shut before letting out a sigh.

This man’s mind is broken and is beyond saving….

----------

©Ghosty-writes-23, 2024. all rights reserved. !I DO NOT! consent to translations or replications or reproduction of my work on any other social media platforms and or make AI Bots without my explict consent and permission.

[matan4il]

To the Nonnie who asked me about the mass grave in Gaza, you're pretty close to the truth of it rather than the anti-Israel propaganda.

First of all, the mass grave next to the hospital in Gaza has been shown already to have been dug before Israel got there.

Now, it wasn't untouched by the Israeli army, but that is a result of two contributing factors, both of which linked to Hamas.

One is because of the bodies of terrorists, who were using the hospital, and were killed during the fighting. They had to be buried somewhere. This is the Nasser hospital, the biggest medical center which was still active in Gaza after the very biggest, the Shifa hospital, had to be raided twice, because Hamas terrorists returned and re-took it, after the IDF evacuated it to allow the place to function as normal. If during the second operation in the Shifa hospital, there were 200 terrorists killed there, and at least 900 more suspects arrested, of which at least 500 were confirmed terrorists as of the end of the operation on April 1, how many terrorists were fighting against the IDF from Nasser, the last big medical complex they could use, when we know the abuse of Gaza hospitals for murderous purposes by terrorists is systematic? (I'm not accepting any numbers claimed by "Gaza's health officials," where no terrorists are mentioned at all, because that's Hamas speaking) Where do people think all those terrorists went to, those who did not surrender? Do people think this is Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and if you stake a villain through the heart, then their body just goes "poof" into thin air, and there's no need to bury it?

The second factor is that Israel did exhume corpses that had been previously buried on the Nasser hospital grounds, to test them for DNA, in case they were what was left of murdered Israeli hostages, still held captive.

This has been done for a while, before this mass grave by the Nasser hospital started making the social media "headlines," so no one can claim this is an excuse made up now, because of this, and in fact, several bodies of Israeli hostages were returned to Israel thanks to the IDF's work, and the first one that comes to mind is that of 19 years old Noa Marziano, because her body was exhumed from the Shifa hospital grounds. She was held hostage in an apartment near the hospital, then moved into Shifa itself, and murdered in its basement. So yeah, guess where they buried her... Together with Noa, Yehudit Weiss' body was also recovered from the Shifa hospital grounds, and returned to her family in Israel.

If people don't like that the Israeli army has had to check bodies buried on hospital grounds for DNA, and then re-bury them together in a mass grave in the same place, then they should take it up with Hamas for murdering people on hospital grounds and for holding corpses as hostages in the first place. We're all living in the twisted reality created by Hamas.

And you know how we can tell that this part, about the bodies being exhumed to check for DNA isn't made up? Because we have regular Palestinians themselves admitting the bodies they're currently looking for in the mass grave are of their loved ones who were already dead by the time Israel got there.

Just to summarize this lunacy, we are being accused of massacring terrorists (who are legitimate targets, killing them was not a massacre, even if we were really successful at it) and already dead people. Make it make sense.

As for the added accusations that Israel skinned the Gazans and stole their organs... The anti-Israel crowd literally claims Israel stole organs in Haiti, when all we did was to send our military emergency medical staff to set up a field hospital there (to help the victims of the earthquake in 2010), and these lies are currently being repeated in print by The Palestine Telegraph (which is based in Gaza. You know, the place where nothing is published if it goes against Hamas interests). If that act of kindness and help could be turned into something sinister and monstrous just because the Jewish state was involved, it's almost a given the same would happen when Israel is at present dragged against its will into a defensive war. It's a recycling of the age old antisemitic blood libels, portraying the Jews as bloodthirsty and capable of any monstrosity. It's antisemitism, pure and simple. THAT is why the Jewish state has to be "comically evil in every way imaginable," like you said. Remember how for centuries in Europe, the 'bloodthirsty Jew' trope served to lie that we kill Christians to use their blood when baking our Passover matzahs? The following cartoon isn't from the Middle Ages, it's from 2018, and depicts Gazans, not European Christians (see the tire in one Palestinian man's hand? In Hamas-organized violent riots that aimed to breach Israel's border in 2018, as they succeeded in doing on Oct 7, many participants burned tires to create a screen of black smoke that would impair IDF soldiers' vision):

Meanwhile, the Islamist terrorist organization and Hamas' buddy, Hezbollah (which has been intentionally firing at civilian communities in northern Israel for months), has killed yet another Israeli civilian overnight, Sharif Suad, an Israeli Arab Muslim Bedouin. Watch the anti-Israel crowd ignore his murder, just like they erase all Israeli civilians victimized. Arab deaths don't count if they can't be used against the Jewish state.

I hope this helped! Take care. xoxox

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

The ATSV fandom is dead! Everything is so slo-

The Hobie tag gets MULTIPLE posts a day. There's a least one Miguel fic published everyday, if not multiple. My favorite artist just posted hi-res Hobie art fully colored like a week ago. Ask 'you got one night with Miguel and a bottle of liquor. WYD' and watch you'll get like 45 responses saying the most smuttiest detailed choke-slam-into-a-train type BDSM in your inbox I PROMISE YOU

The Hobie and Miguel girlies DO NOT SLEEP.

'Dead' - Go hyperfixate on an anime that ended in 2002 who's only new material is Japan-exclusive one-off releases that have never been translated to English then get back to me.

'Dead' - You wanna hear dead? Go play around in the Big Hero 6 tags 💀💀

'Dead' - You remember Wednesday?? The biggest Netflix show of 2022?? Remember? Bet you don't!! Dead fandom.

'Dead' - Go watch all the seasons of Gossip Girl. Watch Vampire Diaries then go in the tags. THAT'S DEAD. That's MUMMIFIED. CREMATED at this point. Death Note and Buffy too.

Bruh you wanna know what my OTHER movie fixation is?

Bullet Train (2022). One off film adapted from a one off book. No sequel. No NOTHING. Go in the bullet train tag bro. We're STRUGGLING. There's like four of us in a huddle screaming about the movie Bullet Train.

We're not waiting for a next movie. Nothing's coming. Half the characters fucking die in the movie so there not coming back. We're just riding this sinking ship until our last goddamn breath 😭😭 ffs

If a character gets like 5 posts a day in their tag, that fandom is not dead girl count your blessings it ain't REALLY dead

Imagine not getting new art of Hobie for over a month. Imagine looking for Miguel smut you haven't read only to see the last one was written three months ago.

COULD YOU IMAGINE?

'Dead', girl this fandom ain't even on life-support and I'm GLAD

[the-overreactress]

I didn’t watch Gilmore Girls as it aired, and there are definitely people out there (likely some of my mutuals!) that watched it in 2000-2007. (For the record, I started watching it in syndication sometime around 2008.) But the thing is…I notice more and more that the show is intentionally misinterpreted or dissected using the standards and ideals of the 2020s. And you know, that tracks because it happens a lot with shows made during the 90s and early 00s. (Looking at you, 7th Heaven 😬)

I just…I feel like we also have to understand the cultural context for why a show like Gilmore Girls or any of the other WB teen dramas were made. The WB channel was created in the mid-1990s for several business related reasons, but one of them was to compete with teen programming made by UPN and Fox. The WB went through a lot of iterations (e.g. picking up Sister, Sister, original: the Jamie Foxx Show, Buffy, Felicity, Dawson’s Creek), but it’s primary focus at the time was making content for teenage girls. Gilmore Girls was the channel’s saving grace after a dip in viewing in 1999 until 2006 when the CW was formed with CBS.

Everyone has likely heard the story that ASP actually came up with the premise of Gilmore Girls on the spot when in a pitch meeting at WB, and it all evolved from there. The thing is…I just…other than the Connecticut setting and the WASP-y Gilmores, the references, music, and jokes of Gilmore Girls are entirely unique and pay homage to a bygone era of comedy. They’re also products of their time, both in positive ways and negative ones (i.e. any of the fatphobia jokes).

However, there’s not anything basic or cliched about having the likes of The Shins or any of the other alt/indie bands Lane, Rory, Jess, et al. listen to on a tv show in that era. In terms of music/soundtrack, Gilmore Girls is actually fucking stellar and better than the vast majority. You have to imagine Amy and the other music supervisors really knew what the fuck they were doing. (I’d kill for a biopic showing the making of Gilmore Girls from this angle!) Lorelai has peak Gen X taste, while Jess, Rory, and Lane are part of that really cool generation of Gen X/Millenial cuspers who got the best of the 80s, 90s and 00s underground.

Watching Gilmore Girls practically requires you to build up a certain level of pop cultural literacy. It’s actually why re-watches of the show are so great. You see and hear things you may not have seen or heard when you were 11, 15, 18, or even 28. I just wish this part of the show was given more attention and credit, in addition to the plots, characters, and fashion. It’s just as much part of the iconography of Gilmore Girls as the other things (if not more!)

[kuwdora]

Saturday Morning Vid Recs - Women!

Back in January I told @poetikat that I wanted to share just a fraction of vids I’ve seen since I started vidding in 2007 that I love. Taken me forever to format the links into a post to share. I have several more posts half-finished and may show up on your dashboard in following weeks or months.

I'm reccing vids that are at least 1 year old, but most of these vids are 4 and 8 and 12 years old and sometimes older. These vids feature a variety of sources, characters, genres of music, genres of shows. Each of these vidders have their own style and the way they approach a song or a source. I love these vids, they're fun to watch, they're hot, mesmerizing, engaging, thoughtful, full of love and horniness and BAMFs and joy and struggle. I love. I love.

I give to you 23 vids for this weekend's theme:

Women!!

Learning to Fly by rhoboat. Beautiful Boxer (2004). A movie vid based on trans Thai boxer Nong Toom’s life. This song is so good showing her journey to learning to find herself and fly! Ako Te Reo by bironic. Rūrangi (2020). Ana learning Te Reo Māori. This vid is so wonderful! It's never too late to learn. Come on Feet by JinkyO. Pumzi (2009). The song choice and pacing is incredible for this Kenyan sci-fi film. Something has to keep us moving forward. Black Nails by fightingarrival. A League of their Own (2022). A Max vid that is a great look at her journey on the show. This vid makes me want to rewatch all her scenes all over again. Here, take this L. Damned if She Do by chaila. Borgen. This source is the Danish political drama Borgen. Birgette is so kick-ass and this song is perfect for her. She come alive when she dying. "Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power." Strict Machine by such_heights. Doctor Who. River Song. I’m in love with River Song so of course I have to rec this. I get high on a buzz then a rush when I'm plugged in you. Counting Stars by beccatoria. DC Animated Wonder Woman. Beccatoria has always done such a great job of vidding animated source and WOMEN!!!! Superstar by @heresluck. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. A Faith vid. This (one of many) epic Faith vids to come out of vidding fandom over the years. This vid lives rent free in my head. But I would pay this vid to live in my head because I love it so much. Never gonna be the same again.

Down & Dirty by @sweeter-than. Killjoys. A Dutch fanvid! A++ song choice for a character study showing her relationship with the Jacobi brothers and her general awesomeness. Make way. Cut Like a Buffalo by kiki_miserychic. Empire. Cookie Lyon fanvid! Cookie has all the skin in the game and she is so good at music, but damn there’s so much bullshit she has to deal with along the way. Yeah, you know I look like a woman but I / Cut like a buffalo / Stand up like a tower, tall / Then I fall just like a domino. Control: A Monstress Fanvid by garrideb. Based on the comic Monstress. You know this Halsey song + any woman who has been Going Through It is going to be a fucking ride. Great editing, amazing art. Fortunate One by @moocowmoocow The Expanse. CAMINA!!! DRUMMER!!!! A Sleater-Kinney cover of Fortunate Son is 10 million kinds of brilliance here for Camina and this source. I ain't no fortunate one. Celebrity Skin by @some-stars. Black Sails. This is an Eleanor and Max character vid. I repeat: Elenor and Max vid to Courtney Love’s music. Heed the warnings. This vid is so goddamn good. It better be worth it. Double Woman by starlady. Detective Dee and the Mystery of the Phantom Flame. So much awesomeness packed into this vid. Through the camera lens re-editing history gives imagination to the people. Wu Zetian and Shangguang Jing'er are awesome. Hooray for awesome ladies of the Tang Dynasty! Titanium by giandujakiss. Wonder Woman (the original tv show). She is titanium! Suffering Sappho.

Mirrors by @kuwdora. Snow White and the Huntsman. Queen/Snow. Lots of fantasy imagery and bdsm like themes since the Queen wants to suck the youth from Snow. Sex. Love. Control. Vanity. Lightning Field by bradcpu, a Legend of the Seeker fanvid of Cara/Kahlan. The imagery in this vid is outstanding, the tone the atmosphere. I have rewatched this more times than I can count. Strike me down, Give it everything you've got. Hands Away by chaila and beccatoria. Sarah Connor Chronicles/Fringe. Sarah/Olivia constructed reality fanvid that is constructed really really fucking well that you might forget that these are two different shows. I can't reach you. (Or, two messiahs walk into an alternate reality) Hurricane by @laurashapiro. Farscape and Battlestar Galactica, Starbuck/Aeryn.This vid is so epic and hot and incredible...Hot and sexy and can’t take your eyes off them. Two pilots walk into a bar. I Wanna Go by millylicious, a multi-source action vid Angelia Jolie tribute. This is fun and delightful. Space Girl by charmax. Multi-source space women and girls! My momma told me I should never watch Sci-fi but I did, I did, I did. Celebration by sweetestrain. Pop divas. Madonna, Rihanna, Lady Gaga, Beyonce, etc. Another one of my favorites of favorites. The connected imagery between all of these music videos still blows my mind, but goes to show you how pop music continues to build and evolve from each other. Plus sexy dancing. If it makes you feel good. Your Song by anoel. Multi-fandom. One of the most epic sapphic/wlw vids out there. I don’t wanna hear sad songs anymore, I only wanna hear love songs.

Hope you like these recs! Follow the tags to keep up #saturday morning vid recs and/or #kuwdora recs

EDITING TO ADD: How to Leave Feedback on Fanvids

[jennycalendar]

spike getting mad at angel for being Team Buffy and getting generally philosophically upset about the concept of a demon "changing" from evil to good is literally so fucking funny because of the two of them, in terms of long-term series character development involving constant transformation, spike is so very clearly the one who is least consistent re: What He Is and What He's Becoming!!! he's the complicated one who is not quite evil not quite good existing outside of the soul lore and gumming up the system!!! and absolutely yes s2 is intentionally ambiguous re: how much of angel's deal is actually as simple as a separation between angel and angelus, AND angel himself is in a constant state of striving to be better, but that's a key word -- CONSTANT. angel's character arc is relatively trackable. spike's evolution throughout the show from one-off big bad to crying on joyce's shoulder to sullen skulking around giles's apartment to Buffy Obsession Extravaganza makes it OBJECTIVELY HILARIOUS when he's like "DEMONS DON'T CHANGE, ANGEL. HOW DARE YOU GO AND CHANGE." biggest case of dramatic irony ever

[isagrimorie]

It’s always frustrating whenever the BAU tackles a case where either the victimology or UnSub has similarities to Prentiss’s background/upbringing but the writers rarely use it to give insights on Prentiss or have Prentiss’s background provide some insights into a case.

As an example, The Performer is an episode featuring Gavin Rossdale as a rockstar whose kayfabe was being a Vampire ala Lestat but fake.

The show could have dove a little into the goth community, a community Emily Prentiss used to be a part of. Did they do that? Unfortunately, no, they hung a lantern on it. The writers had Penelope tease Emily about how she used to dress Goth. Even though, Emily still dressed like one but corporate style.

In the episode, Pleasure is My Business. The UnSub grew up around wealth and privilege and then used sex work to lure her victims.

We discover in Lauren that Prentiss was in a similar enough situation re: Operation Valhalla.

Ala The Americans show, Prentiss used intimacy to get close to Ian Doyle.

Emily Prentiss became Lauren Reynolds because she matched Doyle’s type.

I know the writers had a vague idea of Prentiss’ past only that the writers had breadcrumbs pointing to a rich, mysterious past. They don’t have a crystal ball, but the privileged background could have been a jumping off point for a discussion, an insight to the UnSub’s thoughts.

In the season 16 episode, Orpheus Wrecks, the writers could have again used that case as a way to get more insight into Prentiss’ hidden personal life. As a Politician’s kid, and a somewhat savvy political operator herself, Prentiss would have been as familiar, if more, to the DC wonk space as Bailey was.

Prentiss would also be familiar with the Beltway Elite app even if she didn’t use it herself.

(As a former Spook, the idea of having an app like that in her phone would give Prentiss OpSec paranoia. She would not want her photo distributed everywhere. Being on Politico was enough of a headache for her tbh).

I know Prentiss’ whole thing is she wanted to distance herself from her mother’s political life but she would still have friends and would have known more people as she climbed up the ladder in the FBI.

Other shows like Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Elementary, and Person of Interest almost always use a kernel of similarity/parallelism in their various cases of the week as a jumping-off point to tell a richer story about their characters.

Criminal Minds does but selectively.

This is what makes the show frustrating. You can always tell when the show could have threaded the Case/Monster of the Week and connected the case to one of the characters.

Morgan and JJ also needed more exploration. The only one the writers they consistently use this with is Reid.

To the writer’s credit they have vaguely gestured at Emily’s mysterious past— setting up Emily’s existential crisis about her morality in the face of what she’s done while she worked for CIA and JTF-12.

But then the show goes several episodes mentioning the problem, an arc villain, and it’s frustrating!

(I sometimes lowkey wish some Whedon trained writers joined Criminal Minds to establish a good character-to-case ratio. Like, Jane Espenson. Or someone from Person of Interest writers room joining the Evolution writers team. The idea of Denise Thé writing for the CM ladies makes me yearn because delicious character development + inventive messed up twists. Erica Messer does a good job showrunning— a different job altogether than just writing for the show. But also— I yearn! Think about a POI caliber writer in a CM writers room! It would be so good to have, IMO. Not that PoI was entirely perfect either, I have my frustrations too!)

——

Chris Mundy seemed interested in delving into the internal lives of the characters, especially Emily’s. Demonology was really important for our understanding of Emily Prentiss.

Her guilt, her low-key self-loathing— the way she runs from the people she loves because she thinks she’s not worth it. The way she can conform to be anyone to fit into a situation and not stand out.

Her casual regard for sex as a tool to help her get accepted. All things that were helpful for Prentiss when she became a spy.

As Michael Westen from Burn Notice said: “People with happy families don’t become spies. A bad childhood is the perfect background for covert ops.”

TLDR— It’s just frustrating because they’re always nearly at the cusp of a great character driven procedural but then almost always back off from giving us really good food.

[figsandfandoms]

i feel like buffy and xander are both struggling with gender but like, from different angles?

buffy wants to be a typical girl, with the hair and the dates and the boys and the dresses. that's the life she wants, but instead she's the strong one, the protector, the fists. she's the one having to make the tough calls, she's the one who can't commit and can't say i love you, two traits that are typically given to male characters.

she struggles against this the whole series, the forced masculinisation of herself that comes with being a slayer.

meanwhile xander is the more feminine-coded one of the group- he's the damsel in distress, the one who needs protecting and saving, he's the heart. he's the one who goes to buffy and talks to her about her relationship with riley, something that could have easily come from willow but xander noticed and had the talk.

xander's the one staying at home and cleaning while buffy is out saving the world. he's struggling with what it means to be a man in the late 90s and early 00s, especially coz he doesn't have the role models he wants or needs- not his father and not even really Giles to an extent, since Giles is the one watching and not acting, but that's not the kind of man xander wants to be.

maybe this is where a lot of the anti-xander-ness comes from in a modern re-watching of buffy. coz it's more acceptable for a woman to struggle with the pros and cons of womanhood than it is for a man to struggle with being perceived as weak or girly. (and i'm saying woman and man here but for most of the series these characters were teenagers).

[coraniaid]

I'm pretty critical of Buffy's final season (because ... well, I've watched it), but there are some things I think it does well and, since I'm trying to talk myself into working on my S7 AU fic again, I thought it might be worth trying to write down what they are.

I like the sense of completeness there is in going back to some of the show's beginnings. I like seeing Buffy in school again, but this time as an adult with a job. It doesn't just let us re-examine the high school years from a new perspective, it gives Buffy's arc over the last few seasons a nice sense of direction. I like what little we see of Dawn in high school. (I wish there were more episodes like Help.) In principle, I even like the fact that this season's Big Bad is a supernatural threat we've seen on the show before.

While I think there are a lot of problems with the execution (and even with the wider concept) of making the First Evil the primary (frequently the only) antagonist, the First being around does give you a lot of possibilities for having characters literally come face to face with their pasts. I like the final scene of Lessons and I like Conversations With Dead People and I like seeing the Mayor on screen again. I wish the show had done more with this concept.

I like meeting new (Potential) Slayers and finding out more about past Slayers. I like Robin Wood. I like Kennedy. (I wish the show did a better job making the audience care about any of the other Potentials.) I like that Faith comes back. I like that there is a focus on what it means to be a Slayer this season (compare how the show opens, with Buffy taking Dawn on patrol and telling her "it's about power..." [which Dawn doesn't have], to the scene in Chosen where Buffy asks the Potentials "what if you could have that power?").

I also (sorry) really like the fact that the writers resisted the urge to make Dawn a Potential or have her suddenly develop any magical powers as a result of being the Key (which there are at least rumours they were talking about doing). I like that the show stuck with the idea that Dawn is the part of Buffy who gets to be an ordinary girl.

For all its flaws (silly CGI battle against monsters I don't care about which is resolved by a random mcguffin from a different show; weird retcon about Sunnydale apparently being inland; a bunch of other unfortunate writing choices I won't get into here) I really do like Chosen a lot. It feels very fitting that the show ends with Buffy both finally getting to leave Sunnydale and with her no longer having to shoulde the burden of being "the" Slayer (or one of only two Slayers, anyway) anymore. I love how open-ended and hopeful that manages to be.

And speaking of Chosen, I like Buffy's "cookie dough" speech. I like the fact that the show lets Buffy end the series single, and recognizing that she doesn't have to be in a serious romantic relationship if she doesn't feel she's ready for one right now. (I like post-S7 Fuffy as a concept a lot, sure, but I think I prefer it as something that neither of them rushes into.)

I like that Amy comes back? I mean, I don't like anything the season does with her, but still: points for remembering she exists, I guess.

I like the fact that Willow gets to grieve Tara but also move on with her life and start dating again. [I don't know if I would have killed Tara off if I was writing S6 -- I think probably not -- but given that Tara did die I think this is the only good option.]

Empty Places is a good .... name for an episode?

For all my (many, many) issues with Andrew Wells this season (and in particular with just how much Andrew Wells is in this season, which is ... a lot), I think Storyteller is ... pretty good? I liked Jonathan, I think it's sad he dies (and his speech about missing high school now that he's left is another good moment from this season) but I wouldn't really have wanted to have him turn up and help save the day either. Having Andrew kill him (and then have to face up to the fact) feels like the right choice, to me, if you were going to bring either character back [I'm not really sure I would have done that though, to be honest].

Equally, for all my irritation at the time wasted on the "is Giles the First Evil?" subplot and at some of the other character deaths the writers did go for, I'm glad that the Core Four all survive. What the season actually does with Giles isn't very good, and neither Xander nor Willow are in this season enough (especially not in its second half), but at least they all get to live.

Oh, and Anya. I'm glad the writers didn't give in to the temptation to kill off Anya for some sort of cheap shock value, the way some leaked early drafts of Chosen suggest they were thinking of doing. Can you imagine how infuriating that would have been? I don't know if I would ever have accepted it. I might even now be living in denial. Thankfully common sense prevailed there and Anya definitely survived.

[ravelqueen]

One thing that is actually super interesting - character wise is how stark the difference between Angel and Angelus is when compared to Spike and be-souled Spike.

Angelus and Angel might as well be two completely different people - the way they act, react and conceptualise the world around them is honestly completely opposite.

Meanwhile, besouled Spike is a lot more aware of his past actions and isn't interested in killing humans for sport etc, but in the way he interacts with the world around him, he's actually still very similar - he's snarky and sarcastic, romantic yet cynical etc.

It's extra funny when you consider that probably this was never supposed to be a Deep Philosophical Ponderance Of The Nature Of A Soul

In my opinion this came out of happenstance: a writing choice forced on the Buffy team, based on when in the narrative it happened.

Angelus was always set up to be this enormous threat, this absolute monster tormenting Buffy, while Angel was supposed to be this fairytale first romance of a wonderful older boyfriend - the dichotomy was probably decided upon before /in season 1.

Spike on the other hand was never planned to get a soul - he wasn't even supposed to stick around longer than the 2nd season! However, the ensoulment made sense with the progression of the story/character if the writers wanted to adhere to the rules of the universe they set up namely:

Vampires are Evil Demons, inhabiting the body of the human before them, and most importantly they are irredeemable and incapable of true human affection. This is extremely important lore in that universe, because Buffy kills a lot of vampires - in the later seasons they aren't even really a major threat and more background ash. If you suddenly introduce the idea that Actually vampires can be fully redeemed, your main characters has been just murdering Possibly Good People willy-nilly for several seasons

Unfortunately, at this point in the narrative, Spike might as well have been ensouled already - he was acting altruistically, out of love (self-reported) and was mostly just helping our heroes, with motivations unrelated to villainous impulses

So really the writers had to give him a motivation to go and get his soul (the writing choices on how he gets there Being Bad notwithstanding).

HOWEVER, they really really couldn't pull the same move with Spike that they did with Angel re: his 180 degree personality switch simply because the audience liked non-soul Spike. They enjoyed the personality and character that had been crafted for the last 5 seasons, so changing him too much would have with almost complete certainty been met with negative reactions .

Which is why I assume they decided to simply soften parts of his personality, make him stop wanting to kill humans and called it a day on his other less-than-cuddly personality traits.

Which leads us to question on why two people in the same circumstances turned out so wildly different ESPECIALLY since William seemed Basically Alright when he's human.

Does that mean that Angel is fundamentally a worse person, only held back by the morality of his soul? Or that he was fundamentally a much more virtuous man and therefore the loss of his goodness had a larger impact, as removing those parts took away more of what he used to be?

That William was a lot more acerbic and mean deep down and therefore not too different? Or that actually William lost way less of his morality/capacity for empathy when he turned because Something and that led him to doing less awful things that would lead to a personality change??

Those are such interesting questions that somehow the show never addresses (as far as I know? comics people?) aside from Angel Being Mad that Spike got over his angst so quickly and it's just hilarious to me that if I'm right this basically was never meant to be that deep and simply just a byproduct of What The Fuck To Do With Spike

[comradesummers]

don't really care for the buffy/riley storyline but i do find it really funny re: my theory that buffy is lowkey a leftist icon, that their relationship is consistently presented in direct opposition to like american militarism. this patriotic soldier boy spends a month with buffy and her friends and suddenly he's defecting from the army, punching a general and calling himself "an anarchist" (truly one of the most unintentionally funny moments in the entire show). then the moment he leaves her he rejoins the military and goes to do colonialism in south america (yes i know they're technically hunting demons or whatever but it's still the us military, i mean come on). basically, the storyline is a lot more entertaining if you interpret it as the tale of comrade buffy trying to radicalize her boyfriend only for him to cheat on her and confirm that he was a bootlicker all along.

[mpixx]

cattonquick buffy au pt. 5

cn: sex pollen...again

"So, umm..." Felix looks at Oliver who looks a little pale around the nose.

He clears his throat, then continues speaking into his phone, holding the vial against the light. "So the, quote, "horny potion", you brought earlier...if it had been accidentally ingested...under the assumption that it was, say, vanilla flavoring..."

"They really should IQ test people before they make them the Chosen One," Venetia sighs at the other end of the line.

Oliver looks at him like he really wants to know what Venetia is saying.

"So what would happen. Theoretically?"

"It's a horny potion, Felix. What it says on the tin."

"Well, it doesn't say anything on the tin - which is the problem."

"It will make you very horny."

"Fuck," he says, letting his head fall back, baring his throat. He just wanted to make a nice vanilla latte for Ollie and himself.

When he raises his head again, Oliver is pacing the library, clenching and unclenching his hands.

"So is it like a..." Felix cups his hand around his mouth and lowers his voice so Oliver doesn't hear. "A fuck or die situation?"

"It's not a fuck or die, it's just very likely that y'all fuck."

"Because it's a horny potion."

"Yes, Felix."

"Can you give me the phone?" Oliver is suddenly standing in front of him, wiggling his hand. "Err...sure." He passes the phone to Oliver, who starts pacing again.

"Mm-hm. Ok. Mm-hm. Ok. Ok. Ok. Thanks, Vee." Oliver pockets Felix's phone. Then, he walks over to the library door and locks it. The way he does it with such finality sends a little shiver down Felix's spine.

Oliver turns around. "We need to quarantine."

"Okay." Felix nods.

"Until it wears off. Which could be anywhere between an hour and the whole night."

He sits down at the table across from Felix.

They stare at each other.

"At least it's not a fuck or die," Felix offers.

Oliver's eyes turn wide and his mouth opens, before he shakes his head. "Uh." He blinks. "Yeah."

Silence again. Oliver starts folding and re-folding his hands on top of the table while Felix bounces his leg under it.

"We'll just wait it out," Oliver says.

Felix nods.

"Shouldn't we be in different rooms, tho?"

"Oh," Oliver says. "Right. Um...I can go into the back room? You can stay here?"

"Probably better."

"Yeah."

"It will be really boring in separate rooms, though," Felix points out.

"We can split up once it starts working."

"Yeah," Felix says. "Once it starts working."

***

They've fidgeted, alternating between staring at each other and pointedly looking away for about 15 minutes, when Oliver asks: "Do you feel something?"

Felix swallows. "I don't know. Maybe? You?"

"Yeah. A little."

Oliver's hand is still on the table as Felix reaches out. Oliver lets out a little gasp as Felix's fingertips skim his knuckles. Felix's fingers twitch as well. It's like a little electrical shock, except a lot more pleasurable.

He can't help but smile. "Did you feel that?"

Oliver is smiling, too. "Yeah."

Oliver mimics the motion, the pads of his fingers brushing over Felix's knuckles now, then their fingers brush together. "Feels good," Oliver says quietly. "Yeah," Felix agrees, throat clicking as he swallows hard.

He is painfully aware that they said they were gonna go to separate rooms once it starts working. And Felix is pretty sure it has started working. Yet, neither of them are bringing up the separate rooms thing. And he'll be damned if he does - if Oliver won't.

"Any...anything else?" Oliver asks. Their fingers are still touching on the table.

"I also feel like I would like to kiss you right now," Felix says.

"Do you think it would be weird..."

"I don't think it would be weird...," Felix barely finishes before their mouths connect and his hands wrap around Oliver's wrists.

They're in this awkward position between sitting and standing so Felix stands up and lifts Oliver onto the table. Oliver lets out a little gasp, then kisses him again, clumsy and eager, his hands curling around Felix's biceps.

It feels so good. So, so good. It's not normal, that's for sure. In fact, Felix is starting to think giving in to the potion was a bad idea because he is afraid nothing will ever compare to the way Oliver's nose bumps his, or Oliver's little mouth slips off his jaw, or the way Oliver's legs squeeze hard around him as Felix picks him up with ease and presses him into a bookshelf.

"Why does this feel so good?" he whispers into Oliver's hair. It's like his skin is on fire, and he knows Oliver must feel the same because he's gasping and sighing at every touch of Felix's hands and mouth on his skin like it's the best thing he's ever felt.

They're on the desk at some point, because Felix can't undress Oliver while holding him up against the shelf, and then they're on the couch because it's softer than the desk, and then, maybe, they start it all over again, he's not sure, it's just...

***

Afterwards, they're laying on one of the couches together, Oliver in his arm, wearing Felix's hoodie because he got cold. It should feel awkward, with them being colleagues and all, but it doesn't. It just feels right.

They're both looking down at their tangled hands, fingertips brushing over knuckles. Felix wonders if that's gonna be their thing - when his phone rings.

He finds it in Oliver's chinos which are on the floor next to the desk.

"Vee?" He walks back to the couch, sits back in his previous spot so Oliver can lean against his chest again.

"Yeah, Felix? I just wanted to say, all clear. I have the potion right here - I didn't leave it at the library."

"...........oh."

"What's up?" Oliver asks in his arm, turning his chin up to look at Felix, his blue eyes soft and a little cross-eyed without his glasses.

Felix puts the phone down without saying goodbye.

"So, umm...funny story..."

[housewarningparty]

If you're still interested in doing the AU concepts thing I would love to give you an opportunity to talk and to hear more about s7 hot janitor!Faith

The biggest weakness of s7 au is that I don't actually want to deal with the plot of s7 at all, I just think working class ex con Faith would be really hot and it would be cool if she and Buffy teamed up again. So with the disclaimer that this is strongly vibes over plot

Definitely envisioning a s7 that's more aligned with what "Lessons" set up: Hellmouth shenanigans at Sunnydale High, but this time Buffy is approaching things from the perspective of a counselor instead of a student. More lower stakes MotW style events. Some kind of Hellmouth centric big bad - maybe an evil PTA or something. Who gives a shit.

S7 feels like a good time for Faith to re-enter the scene anyway. Not that everyone's over what she did, but SO many monumental shifts have happened, I think she'd be an easier pill to swallow at this point. Anyway I like the one in/one out rule for redemption arc baddies. A Spikeless Scooby Gang feels like it has room for Faith

The 50/50 Sunnydale High split that Counselor Buffy and Janitor Faith are able to work out is pretty efficient. Being closer to students and faculty means Buffy can keep an eye on rumors and look out for trouble that way, while Faith literally has the keys to the building and license to be pretty much anywhere at any time. I also like the idea that there are certain kids in a particular kind of trouble that would gravitate more to Faith than to Buffy, but that they might be able to work together to help those kids anyway

The high school rumor mill around Buffy and Faith would be insane btw. Dawn would get so sick of people asking her what their deal is. But Buffy and Faith are always whispering to each other off in some corner! They arrive at school together sometimes! They're always staring at each other! SOMETHING IS GOING ON

Dawn would definitely struggle at first with accepting Faith, I think she'd be very committed to resenting her on principle, but the key to Faith's relationships in this au is not winning people over by charming them, but simply by being there, doing what she said she would do regardless of how other people treat her. She is trying very VERY hard to take the lessons of prison and the Angel Brain Walk to heart. But much like in actual s7, the key difference in dynamic between Dawn and Faith vs Dawn and the rest of the Scoobies is that Faith doesn't treat her like a little sister. She doesn't try to tell Dawn what to do or how to be, but I think she'd look out for her in her own way - noticing when a store clerk clocks Dawn shoplifting and subtly stepping in to make sure Dawn puts everything back before she leaves the store so she can't get in trouble, covering for Dawn when she wants to sneak out, stuff like that.

@jewishsuperfam and I have talked about an s7 AU a bunch before, tagging her to jump in and embellish this if she wants to

[autisticandroids]

Yeah re: soulless Sam I was always interested and a bit troubled by the way s6 handled it where like they presented soulless sam as the primary issue/threat yet I found deans controllingness and dislike towards soulless sam equally if not more threatening. Like it felt like soulless sam was Not The Problem- dean reacting very poorly to a sam he could neither control nor understand was the issue. Would you have handled it differently than the show and if so, how?

so i think this ask is a response to this post.

yeah i mean this is something that really bugs me in the show. so first of all, the writers don't really have a handle on what it means to be soulless - they never do, throughout the whole show.

this is firstly because the concept of soullessness is cribbed wholesale from buffy, where it is ALSO stupid and makes no sense. but in spn, it's worse, because spn already has its own interpretation of buffy's vampires - you can draw a pretty one to one line between how buffy uses vampires and how spn uses demons. except that demons are one of the things that spn actually does better than buffy - instead of being inherently evil in a way that's justified by nature, demons have two things going on. first, they are soldiers in an army - they have a reason to be evil and it's that that's what they're ordered to be. second, the difference between a demon and a human is that the demon has gone through centuries or millennia of torture to turn them into a new person. which is like... a comprehensible difference. the reason that all demons love violence and constantly commit it is a result of being intentionally shaped into being that way by the other demons who tortured them, who were also tortured in their turn, on and on all the way back to lucifer. this is to me more compelling and makes more narrative sense than "vampires don't have souls and so therefore they're inherently evil (so we can have lots of cool scenes of buffy killing them and not worry about it)."

so the concept of soulless sam is basically "hey let's crib one of buffy's stupidest worldbuilding elements for a second time, but this time we won't iterate on it until it's good." bad, broadly, i would say.

man. 3.5k words. the rest goes under a cut.

secondly i would say that the individual writers have totally different ideas about what a "soulless sam" should look like. this is partly just stupidity i think - ben edlund's* idea of what soulless sam is isn't that different from brett matthews', they both write him as an unemotional pragmatist who doesn't actually have bad intent. it's just that matthews is a bad writer, and he's also taking the directive from the top that sam should be "evil," which edlund clearly isn't listening to. whereas for example dabb and lofflin are writing soulless sam as an active monster. same with gamble i would say, though that's less clear cut.

now, there are people reading this right now who think that i'm about to say "we should throw out soulless sam" but i actually don't agree with that. i LIKE elements of soulless sam. i think at his best he makes a really great foil for like... where dean is at in season six. i think that his, like, existence is a great torture for dean, partly because he's such a fabulous foil. and frankly, i also think jared padalecki seems like he's having an absolute ball playing a cheerful bastard, and it makes soulless sam absolutely magnetic to watch. oh before you read any further you should probably read this post, it's really good.

anyway i'm going to take three episodes and compare them. we're gonna look at live free or twihard, clap your hands if you believe, and caged heat.

i'm also gonna talk a little about later handlings of soullessness.

but first i'm gonna say that the concept of soulless sam as "evil sam" is dumb. if he's evil sam then... do something else to him. but the premise of soulless sam is just that he lacks emotion and lacking emotion is not like.... Becoming Evil. that's so stupid it's unreal. and it doesn't lead to an interesting idea of the character of soulless sam!!! there's nothing to do with that except Bad Guy!!!!! stupid.

anyway, between twihard, clap your hands, and caged heat, i would say twihard is absolutely my least favorite, clap your hands is my most favorite, and caged heat is somewhere in the middle, at least in terms of handlings of soulless sam specifically.

so in twihard, sam lets dean get turned by a vampire. it's not malicious, he just wants to test the vampire cure on him. this is so fucking stupid it's unreal. brett matthews is going for "unfeeling pragmatist" here but he also clearly wrote backwards from the idea of sam as the antagonist who got dean turned. it makes very little sense for sam to have done this, it's not unfeelingly pragmatic, it's silly, and it exists purely to manufacture soulless-sam-as-antagonist. dumb and bad.

vs. clap your hands, where soulless sam isn't an antagonist. he's a foil, and he makes dean very upset, but he mostly acts both reasonably and in concert with dean. he's just offputting. like, dean gets abducted, and then sam does his best to get him back, but when he can't work anymore, he cheerfully has sex with the hippie girl. that is, genuinely, offputting to the point of a little disturbing. it very successfully shows us a man who is not feeling things the way most people do. but it's not evil. it's just weird. and it's really successful as a foil to dean's "feelings are king" shtick.

vs. caged heat, which has a little bit of both. i'm mostly going to look at the first scene with meg, which has both my favorite and least favorite moment.

my favorite moment is this:

SAM laughs. DEAN: Something funny, Sam? SAM: Yeah, Meg. DEAN: Really? ’Cause where I’m sitting… SAM: Don’t worry. She can’t do jack squat. She’s totally screwed. DEAN: Sam, not helping! SAM: Look at her, Dean. She’s furious. If she could kill you, she’d’ve done it by now. She’s running. MEG: Am I? SAM: Judging by the level of flop sweat on all of you, yeah. Which means you’re running from Crowley. Which makes sense. Crowley would want to hunt down all the Lucifer loyalists now that he’s the big man on campus.

so what's happening here is that dean is being very genuinely menaced. by meg. like he's in maybe some serious danger. and sam has been trying to protect him by talking to meg. but sam is also totally calm. because he doesn't care. he doesn't want meg to rape dean, to cut him up, to kill him. but he's not scared, and he's not empathizing with dean's fear, even though he knows it exists. in fact this fact allows him to notice that meg is scared, that she can't actually cut dean up. her threats are empty. i think this is a great use of soulless sam because, again, it's offputting, and it's obviously callous. dean would be totally within his rights to be pissed about this, like sam is out of pocket here. but he's not really doing anything bad.

and now my least favorite part: literally the next two lines.

MEG: How would you know? SAM: It’s what I’d do.

STUPID. STUPID STUPID STUPID. ooooooooooooh sam is soooooooooo evil he can obviously perfectly predict crowley DUMBBBBBBB. STUPID DUMB. sorry i get so mad when i hear this line. genuinely i kind of love caged heat there's a reason it's one of my most-watched eps but this line makes me SO mad.

like this is so clearly a finger on the scale to make him seem evil. it makes zero sense and is just... making the scene unwatchable.

for better ideas about soullessness, i actually think we should look to season eleven. in season six and season fourteen with soulless sam and soulless jack, things are kind of a clusterfuck. i talked about soulless jack here in preparation for making this post, but suffice to say that the soulless jack arc was even messier than the soulless sam arc - primarily because being soulless simply did not affect jack's characterization that much. the opposite problem to sam, who got his characterization fucked so he could say "muahaha look how evil i am" occasionally.

but in season eleven none of the main characters are soulless, so there's no need for a soulless person to be an "evil version" of a main character. instead, the soulless are amara's victims. they constitute problems, but are primarily indicative of a larger problem.

this is how the episode "thin lizzie" exists. that's my favorite soulless episode, because it tries to actually take seriously what having "no emotions" would mean for its characters. so you have soullessness as tragedy and as heroic trait. because len can no longer experience joy or fear, his life is empty, but he is also fearless and has nothing to lose.

or another interesting idea of soullessness is. deep sigh. jack in the box. because jack's emptiness leads him to be unable to understand the emotions of others, and therefore to be easily tricked because he can't empathize well enough to predict that salmondean are obviously lying to him.

both of these are concepts of "emotionlessness" that don't revolve around "you become an evil genius." which is just.... it's stupid. it's dumb.

anyway all this to say that a more coherent concept of soulless sam primarily modeled on clap your hands if you believe would really improve season six. for me.

anyway that's NOT really answering your question All That was like a prologue to answering your question which was actually about the character drama. anyway the thing about dean in season six is that i really like him. he's my special guy. he's melting down like a reactor core every moment of every day.

and soulless sam is perfect for this because he's making it so much worse.

the thing about dean is that he has just had one of the worst(?) years of his life. first of all sam was dead. for a year. sam was DEAD for a YEAR. dean winchester, noted soul seller, noted enmeshment enthusiast, noted identity lacker, his sam was DEAD!!!!!!! FOR A YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!! i don't think people recognize how crazy it is that sam was dead for a year.

this is like the most important thing. but also: dean tried out being Normal. and he HATED it.

the thing about dean is that he doesn't really think normies are people. he thinks they're cardboard cutouts. sitcom characters. he thinks their life has laugh track and they stop existing when the camera stops rolling.

and dean desperately craves this. he wants it so bad. except then he tries it and. and he still exists. he still has to wake up every morning and put one foot in front of the other. still has to go to sleep and dream of alastair. every excruciating moment of "being dean winchester" still happens and he's still experiencing them. and that's the worst case scenario for dean: he doesn't want to exist. he doesn't want to experience "being dean winchester" because it's awful. being dean winchester is nothing but pain. but becoming a normie didn't actually make "being dean winchester" stop happening to him. he's still suffering. except now.... now his last comfort, the idea that maybe someday he could have a normal life and stop "being dean winchester" for good? that's gone. there's no hope. he's this or he's dead.

like, i made a joke about dean's breakdown in unity being kind of about this, dean being desperately hopeful that killing chuck will make "being dean winchester" stop happening to him. like dean's most desperate wish for his whole life has been to stop existing, in some way or another, death or identity destruction or mindlessness. and to take hope of that away, to ruin his chance to not exist anymore... well, that's going to have an impact. that's a big part of what's going on with dean in season six.

and then there's the less world-endingly tragic element that he just... doesn't like being a normie. this is imo mostly just because he set himself up to fail. lisa is a stranger, she's very nice but she's basically just an idea to him when he moves in with her. it's not clear if they even like each other. he throws himself into this concept role of the Normal White Picket Fence Guy without asking himself if he enjoys any part of it. he keeps drinking - he was on fifty drinks a week in season five and even if he cut that way down, like in half or something, that's still potentially "at least impaired most of the time" levels of alcoholism. and again, sam is dead, but also dean cut himself off from everyone else he knows. he cut off bobby, most relevantly, but also cas, and he's certainly cut off any other hunting-related contacts given that he cut off bobby. he's totally stripped himself of his support network. he doesn't even let himself drive his fucking car. and then of course there's the fact that no matter how traumatizing and horrible hunting was, there were things about it that he was used to and would likely have missed. he didn't have to work a nine-to-five. he could go wherever he wanted. he in general had a kind of freedom that most people don't, even if it was more the "me and bobby mcgee" sort than anything else. and of course: hunting is exciting. it kept him stimulated. with nothing keeping him on his toes, the horror and trauma of the last twenty eight years of his life can hit full force. all he can do is wallow in it. there's no new horror to keep him focused. and also he's just..... used to living an exciting life. i'm sure that he finds normality just, deeply understimulating. which is its own sort of horror.

and in his mind there are only two options for him: be normal, in exactly the way he tried with lisa, or be a hunter, in exactly the way he always has. so when he realizes that being normal in that way is awful.... well. he settles in. this is another way in which his year with lisa strips him of hope for the future: he can no longer imagine any life other than his current one, because the one other option he thought he had turned out to kind of suck.

and then. i've said this before. but oh my god. everyone LIED to dean about sam being back!!!!! for a YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they lied to him for a YEAR! he grieved sam for a YEAR! and NO ONE told him. dean is surrounded by people who have betrayed him in this horrible way! everyone he loves INCLUDING SAM participated in this betrayal! wouldn't that make you crazy? wouldn't that make you insane? to live a year of life-destroying grief and then find out that that was basically orchestrated by the people you love most? no matter how good their reasons?

and then of course... of course there's the fact that sam is back. sam is back and he's... real. he exists in the world. he's not dean's sainted sammy who exists in his mind, dead and glorified. he's a real person who does things and makes choices. and that's... that's hard. this is once again fantasy bumping up against reality for dean. his relationship to sam has always been tortured but of course while grieving sam, sam exists only in his mind. and part of the problem is obviously that sam came back wrong but also, it's just that absence makes the heart grow fonder. even if sam hadn't been soulless dean just can't really cope with like. conflict in a way that doesn't make him crazy. and of course once again i must remind you that SAM LIED. SAM LIED TO DEAN ABOUT BEING ALIVE. FOR A YEAR. WHICH IS PRIMING DEAN FOR SOME FUCKING CONFLICT.

so you have all of this. and also when dean is like caaaaaaasssss come fix it for me cas is busy. and also dean's destructive anxiety over lisa and his resentment of her. and you put this all in a bottle and you shake it up. dean is NOT a happy camper. he's miserable and he just can't cope. but life keeps going on! things keep moving!

and i think soulless sam, as he is in clap your hands, is like this perfect foil for that. i wouldn't dream of getting rid of him.

but the thing is. that's all in 6x01-6x10. killer stuff, but it is absolutely wrecked by what comes after.

i fucking hate appointment in samarra. it's just not a good episode. even though tessa and death are there!! i love tessa! i love death! can't save appointment in samarra though.

like first of all. dean kills himself in it and it's not even fun. dean just kills himself. you will never be advanced thanatology. but second of all...

okay lets talk about other times dean has saved/fixed sam in some way at least somewhat against his will. i'm going to use three examples: selling his soul, the panic room, and the gadreel thing. the first two, gamble was intimately involved with writing (she wrote crossroad blues AND ahbl 1 AND when the levee breaks! come on) and the other is clearly an intentional retread of appointment in samarra.

in ahbl 2, dean sells his soul because... well because he can't cope without sam. because he has no identity outside of sam. because familial duty is the reason he's alive. because he wants to die. because a moment of loneliness is more terrifying to dean than eternity in hell.

and in season nine dean is in a similar place. obviously he's not killing himself, and he also is less like, absolutely codependent with sam because he has more people in his life now, but he still would have no idea who he is without "look out for your little brother, boy." he still can't imagine a life without sam.

with the panic room, dean is angry at sam, he's absolutely punishing him, but he's still.... there's still duty, there. "at least he dies human" is horrific, but it carries within it some twisted attempt to justify dean's decision with sam's wellbeing. and dean is punishing sam for like, betraying him. dean is deeply hurt because he LOVES sam and he wanted to slide right back into their old life together but little sammy grew up while he wasn't looking, and also REPLACED HIM with that DEMON SLUT. like dean is angry because he WANTS HIS SAMMY BACK.

whereas in appointment in samarra... it honestly mostly just reads like dean thinks soulless sam is a problem he needs to solve. it feels like he would be happy with either outcome (sam going back to normal or Just Straight Up Dying) not because he wants to save sam in any meaningful way but because he wants to get RID of soulless sam. this is the dean who feels like he needs to take a rape shower because he took orders from another man.** he's just sort of lovelessly grasping for control. which i guess you could say is a reasonable direction to take his character, he certainly felt like he was out of control in the first half of the season (hell. just twihard alone is like a massive loss of control for him and has echoing ramifications) and clawing to get it back i guess makes sense. and of course the other times he "saved" sam were also about control of COURSE they were. even ahbl a little. but it's so loveless in appointment in samarra/like a virgin. it creates a dean who is just... hard to like. not because he behaves badly but in a way that makes it just.... hard to care about him.

you could probably easily fix this by adding a theme of nostalgia for the "real sam" integrated throughout the preceding episodes. or like, there's a perfect scene that exists in my heart where immediately after dean beats sam to a bloody pulp in you can't handle the truth, he scoops him up in his arms and rushes him to the hospital because he saw gray matter on the last punch. that creates a kind of tension within dean that makes the horrible things he does to sam more charmingly tragic and less plain awful, even though they remain horrible. you can create a perfect pear wiggler for dean where he behaves monstrously and yet it's all shot through with twisted love. that's something i love to see from dean. the first half of season nine does this fabulously. but as it stands it's not there with soulless sam, and i wish it was. especially when dean is trying to fix him.

just in general broadly i think dean's characterization in the back half of season six is just. a clusterfuck. it makes sense in 6x06 that dean doesn't care about the angel war because he's having his little freakout about sam and nothing matters to him except that. but in 6x19? 6x20? what's the deal? why do sam and dean decide cas is their enemy for trying to save them? it's not like they have a plan. they certainly accepted the angel civil war mattered at the end of 6x10. they just backstab cas for no reason. broadly, the character conflict in the back half of s6 is just fucked. in the front half it makes sense because dean is having one long irrational but understandable temper tantrum due to the horrors already outlined in this post. but in the back half it's just. nothing. to have a good soulless sam arc i think you would have to just throw out the back half. get sam re-ensouled a different way. not have the godstiel arc be Like That. it just needs to go a totally different way, because s6 is a mess afer caged heat.

*although edlund isn't exactly without sin here. mr. Being Soulless Makes You Fuck Good

**and the thing is caged heat is doing something with that in the sense that caged heat is about how dean IS sexually vulnerable, you just Can't Show It On Television. meg is dean's proxy but we are meant to understand that all that Could happen to dean. dean saying he needs to take a rape shower after taking orders is underestimating his own vulnerability to sexual violence. it's notable that brett matthews only wrote two episodes and the other one was twihard. but i digress.