#you wouldn’t think writing smut makes me uncomfortable since it’s all fictional

[a-small-writer-in-a-big-world]

Might have to rewrite the next chapter of roommate series since it feels wrong but I also think what’s stopping me from writing is that it has smut in it and im still a little eh about my skills as a smut writer

Hopefully the new chapter will come out soon tho it doesn’t take me long if I actually just sit down to write

[changbunnies]

All About You (18+)

♡ Pairing: Royal Knight/Bodyguard!Minho x Princess!Reader

♡ Genre: age gap, royal au, historical au, arranged marriage au (reader only), angst, kind of forbidden love? (maybe more than kind of), basically porn with plot

♡ Word Count: 7.5k

♡ Summary: You, the princess who ran away from the castle after finding out your father, the king, has finalized your arranged marriage. Minho, your royal knight and glorified bodyguard, tasked with bringing you back home at all costs. When found, you hit Minho with a very interesting proposition- for him to be the one you share all your "firsts" with, instead of your inevitable husband.

♡ Warnings: age gap !! reader is ~23 while minho is in his 40s, please don't read if this makes you uncomfortable!, uneven power dynamics, outdated traditions and views on women to suit the setting, brief reference to death by guillotine and death in general, mentions of injury and swordfighting

♡ Smut Warnings (contains spoilers): lowkey corruption kink, loss of virginity (reader), pet names (princess (mostly as a title), good girl), slight sub + dom dynamics, soft dom minho, a lot of kissing (should be expected from me atp), nipple play, oral (f receiving), fingering (f receiving), slight overstim, unprotected piv, multiple orgasms, creampie

♡ Notes: at this point i am determined to write a royal au fic for every member, and my newest offering to you is minho <3 i was literally possessed writing this like once the idea hit my brain i had to get it out asap

♡ Disclaimer: please read responsibly, and remember that this work is fiction and meant strictly for imaginative fun. the idols used in fics are more accurately faceclaims and personality outlines for imaginary characters, and should not be interpreted as factual representations of existing people.

Fuck. Minho was absolutely fucked.

In recent years, he had one job, and one job only, and that was to take care of the princess. Make sure she’s safe, escort her to where she needs to be and watch over her at all times��� that’s all. Not always an easy job, but one of vital importance that Minho took with utmost seriousness. In the 3 years it’s been since becoming your royal knight and glorified bodyguard, he never messed up this critically. 

You always had a rebellious streak and challenged authority, everyone in the castle knew that. And part of Minho’s job, apart from keeping you safe, was keeping you in check– and the king made it extremely clear that failing to do so was not an option.

He lost track of the amount of times he uttered the words “Princess, please think rationally,” or “please consider your responsibility to the kingdom, don’t do this,” in a near desperate attempt to get you to listen to reason. 

And today, he fucked up the worst he ever had. He knew you were upset tonight, but he was under the impression he successfully calmed you down, and that you wouldn’t do anything rash. He turned his back to you, thinking the storm had been quelled, and that you’d listen to your father, even if doing so felt like pulling teeth. He underestimated however, just how deep your sadness and anger truly ran, and the very moment you saw an opening, you took it. 

You fled from the castle with blind determination, nowhere to go and with little of value in your hands, fueled purely by the desire to escape your unfair circumstances, and live your own life by your own means. You may not believe it, but Minho understood, and felt for you– he really did. But that didn’t change what his duty was, and even if it made you hate him, he had to do his job to the best of his ability. 

So now here he was, roaming the streets looking for you, the hours passing in a blur. You must’ve done a good job of concealing your identity, because no one he asked had seen a young woman matching the princess' description. And as the minutes ticked by, and sunset turned to midnight, he was at a complete loss of what to do.

He made record time combing the entire bustling town, stopping into places full to the brim with people in the hopes he’d catch a glimpse of you in the crowd, and yet there seemed to be no trace of you anywhere. It was easy for someone to hide their presence in a crowd, or in the rowdy environment of a tavern, and you were more than intelligent enough to blend into a crowd and divert attention away from yourself.

It was entirely possible that Minho had seen you at some point, and simply didn’t realize it, though he liked to believe he’d recognize you anywhere, no matter what you wore. Minho scowled, clenching his teeth as he scanned the dark horizon of the treeline; should he check the outer walls of the town for a clue, or double back and check the streets again?

He doubts you made it out of the town easily, considering you likely had no money on your person and little experience with the realities of the world. You were intelligent, yes, but sheltered; he could easily imagine you quickly getting in over your head, thinking you could make it to the next town without issue, only to end up lost and in need of help, with no one for miles to hear your desperate cries. 

Fuck. If he couldn’t find you, his head would most certainly be meeting the cold steel of a guillotine. He had no family who would mourn his loss, but still, he wasn’t ready to face his mortality. And the king, despite being someone he could call a close friend, would spare no mercy if he failed to keep his one and only daughter safe.

But really, there was more to it than just the threat of death that kept him searching for you. Believe it or not, he genuinely wanted you safe and well, and he'd do anything to ensure you made it back home, even if it made you curse him for the rest of his days. 

As if God himself heard his prayers and decided to grant him a miracle, Minho sees you– there, on the outskirts of town, holding your cold hands up to your face and letting your breath warm them. It’s dark, the street barely even illuminated enough to discern your recognizable features, but he knows without a doubt that it's you standing there in the cold street, because truly, he knows you anywhere. 

By the time you realize you’ve been spotted and recognized, it’s already much too late to flee. Minho approached you with utmost haste, reaching out and grabbing your arm, lest you make the foolish decision to try to escape again. His hold, while not rough enough to hurt you, is firm, and it only takes one attempt at pulling your arm from his hold to know this is it; your escape attempt has failed, and you’ll be dragged back to the castle and reprimanded for your “temper tantrum.” 

Your father never listens to you, no matter how hard you try to make him understand and see your point of view. Maybe if you were born a boy, your opinions would be important to him, and he’d see you are more than an object to pawn off to whatever man gave him the most political power.

“Princess–” “I’m not going home,” you interject before he even has a chance, though you already know it’s in vain. There is no avoiding returning to your glorified prison now that Sir Minho has you in his grasp. 

He sighs, but his face changes to one of sympathy, his grip on your arm loosening ever so slightly. “Can we at least go to an inn room? It’s not safe for a young lady to be on the streets at night,” he reasons with you, as gently as he can manage.

Normally Minho is quite stern with you, but you get the impression that he feels being stern isn’t the right approach tonight. You’re known for expressing yourself very vocally, even when doing so is extremely ill-advised, and he is well aware of how opinionated and fiery you are. 

But treating this display as anything other than a genuine act of desperation, a culmination of years of perceived disrespect and conformity, would be another critical error– one he can’t afford to make. So he will be firm, yes, but gentle in his approach.

You frown as you look at him; you’re stubborn by nature, and part of you wants to fight against him until the bitter end, but he’s not wrong about the streets being unsafe for you at night. You know he won’t let you escape again come morning, but that’ll have to be a problem for later; for right now, you really should heed his advice and go to an inn for the night. 

“Fine,” you concede, much to Minho’s relief. He could’ve forced you to go with him if he really needed to, but he’d rather avoid doing something so unpleasant. He leads you to a nearby tavern, which is still bustling with activity even at the late hour.

He keeps you close as he pushes through the crowd of rowdy drunks to the dual innkeep-bartender, hoping that there is still a room available. The man departs, coming back with a key dangling in hand, “You’re in luck. Last room’s all yours.” 

Minho thanks the man and pulls out his satchel to pay him, leaving a few extra coins as a tip before stashing it back in his pocket, along with the key he was given, and the two of you go up the stairs together.

“There’s only one bed,” you comment as you step inside the room, though Minho doesn’t seem to care much about that fact. “That’s fine, don’t plan on sleeping anyways,” he says as he removes his leather scabbard from his back, resting it against the back of the chair in the corner of the room. 

You frown as you sit on the bed and watch him; he must’ve been in a hurry when he received word you fled from the castle, as he wasn’t wearing any of his armor, strictly in casual wear you’d very rarely seen him in. Probably for the best, you think, because if anyone saw a royal knight desperately searching the streets, multiple alarms would be raised.

He lights the fireplace, hoping to quickly spread some heat throughout the cold room, before he sits in the chair, crossing his arms and watching you carefully. Deserved, you suppose. How is he supposed to trust you’re not going to flee at the first available moment just as before?

You certainly don’t make his job easy for him; he can’t take his eyes off you for a second. The silence between you lingers for some time, the crackling of the fire the only sound either of you hear, apart from the muffled patrons enjoying their drinks downstairs. Minho, despite his relaxed posture, looks like he’d be ready to jump up at a moment's notice should he need to. 

You sigh; should you just try to sleep? It’d feel awkward and uncomfortable to try to fall asleep with someone's eyes boring holes into you, but you really didn’t give him much of a choice. “Do you want to tell me why you ran away from the castle?” Minho asks suddenly, breaking the tempered silence between you. “You already know the answer to that,” you respond, crossing your own arms now. 

“Is marrying Sir Jin really so bad?” he asks, and you scoff, rolling your eyes. “Yes, obviously. I don’t want to. Not that you or my father care about me or anything I think.”

Minho’s brow furrows, the frown on his face growing. “Princess, you know that’s not true. I do care about you.”

“Do you? I haven’t been able to tell in the slightest,” you counter a bit harshly, “and you could help me if you wanted to, you know. I’d be fine out there if I was with you.”

Okay, maybe you’re not being fair to Minho right now. You do know he cares, but realistically, what is he supposed to do? If he disobeyed your fathers orders, he’d be lucky if his only punishment was a swift death.

He was assigned to you because your father trusts him to do the right thing and follow orders dutifully, a trust that is usually not misplaced. But he has to admit, the more and more time he spends with you, the more he feels for you. 

Minho never knew your father, the king, to be an unreasonable or cruel man, but in your eyes, he might as well be the devil himself. And maybe he is cruel– because how do you strip someone of their freedom and choices for your own gain, and not see the harm it causes, the wrong in it?

You are more than a pawn, more than a subject, more than his daughter– you are a person. A person with thoughts, feelings, and opinions as real as any mans, who did not deserve to be treated lesser than for the simple crime of being born a girl. 

But what is Minho if not an upholder of the status quo? He was just a single man, and even if he recognized how unfairly you were treated in comparison to the golden child that was your elder brother, what was he supposed to do? He always performed his tasks dutifully and without question, and it wasn’t until he met you that he began to struggle with what he should do, and what he wants to do.

And maybe he could get you out of this town, help you live a quiet, modest life somewhere new, away from the watchful eye of your father. Where he could be your protector, same as now, but without the guilt, burden, or threats.

You know you shouldn’t take your frustrations about your life out on Minho, but he’s really all you have. You trust him with your life, and he’s shown you multiple times that he cares about you beyond the duty he has to you, or to your father. He's your only confidant, the only person in the world you can rely on. 

Your eyes linger on the scar across his nose– he got it protecting you, the other man’s sword barely missing his eyes and cutting just across his face, and it was only one of many scars he obtained in his service to you. He’d pick you up and run with you in his arms when you were injured, he’d fight off attackers without breaking a sweat, sustain injury after injury all to make sure you were safe.

You’d watch his back, always stunned and mesmerized at the ease at which he cut down your enemies, as if they were nothing but paper. When he’d turn back to you, breathing heavy and sweat only just starting to trickle on his brow, his eyes would turn from the harshest winter chill to the gentle warmth of a spring morning.

He was quiet, stern, but his care ran far deeper than one would think just by looking at him, and all you had to do to see the true depth of his feelings was look in his eyes. So you knew it was unfair to accuse him of not caring about you, to expect him to go above and beyond for you, to ask that he go against your father to give you what you want. But you were just so sad, frustrated, angry, that you couldn’t stop yourself.

“Maybe you’ll grow to love him if you give him a chance,” Minho suggests; you both know that’s never going to happen, but what else can he say? He never married, and had no children, dedicated to his duty as he was; he had no real advice to offer someone when it came to love, romance, and the like, but he imagined it wasn’t impossible to fall in love if you just met Sir Jin with an open mind.

But as stated, that’s never going to happen. You’re stubborn to a fault, and once you’ve decided something, there’s no changing it. The best Minho can ever manage to do is get you to reconsider, but even then, you’re still likely to go about things the way you originally wanted to, with no regard for consequences or keeping up appearances. You’re a fiery woman, there was no doubt about it, and you don’t let go of things easily. 

“The mere thought of giving that man all my firsts makes me sick, it’s vile,” you scrunch up your nose, making your distaste for the man very clear. Minho doesn’t even think you’ve actually met the man yet, but you’ve already decided you hate him– you don’t want to marry him, and so you’ll be firmly stuck in your opinion, no matter what anyone says. 

“Maybe this isn’t advice I should be giving you, but.. You don’t necessarily have to. To give him your firsts, or love him. Find someone you do love, even if you have to keep it a secret, and hold him with all you’ve got. It still wouldn’t be ideal, of course, but.. Well, it’d be something, at least.” Really, Minho is supposed to encourage you to be an obedient daughter and listen to your father without question, but he knows you well enough to know that’s a fool's errand. 

You’re never going to listen, never going to be obedient, never going to stop being opinionated. So what’s the next, most realistic piece of advice he can give? Lie, of course. Make your father and inevitable husband believe you’re a good, obedient wife and daughter, and then go live the life you really want behind their backs.

It's dishonest as all hell, and there would be consequences if you got caught, but if you’re going to be miserable no matter what you do, you might as well try, right? It’s what Minho thinks he would do if he were you, anyways. 

“What about you?” you ask and Minho raises a brow in question. “What about me?” he asks, and what you respond with makes him feel like the air has been punched out of his lungs. “What if I gave my firsts to you?”

Did he hear you right? There must be some mistake with his ears, there’s absolutely no way you said what he thinks you did. “You– what?” Surely you can’t be serious about this. You’re the princess, and he’s just the man who happens to be your guard; a man who is your fathers age at that. But the way you look at him, he can tell you’re not joking in the slightest.

“Princess, I couldn’t possibly accept that,” Minho says sternly, his arms no longer crossed but instead resting on the arms of the chair, hands beginning to grip tightly so he can ground himself and try to make sense of this insane situation.

“Why not? I’d be happier if I gave it to someone like you. I trust you,” you say so nonchalantly it makes his head reel. What the fuck is happening right now? 

And truly, Minho was the ideal man; at least in your opinion. He was handsome, mature, realistic and practical, knew how to reel you in without disregarding the root of what you feel or being disrespectful to you.

He never dismissed how you felt, made you feel over emotional or like a fool who overreacts; he’d ask you to see reason, sure, urge you to think more before acting, but he never, never made you feel like your feelings were invalid. And he genuinely cared about you, and you liked him, were attracted to him, so if the opportunity presented itself then.. Why not take the chance? 

Fuck. Minho was absolutely fucked.

You were just freshly 20 when Minho first met you and became your guard, and hard as he tried to never see you beyond the platonic, he’s always viewed you as an attractive young woman. He liked your fiery spirit, liked how you had the bravery and gall to challenge authority, a skill that in recent months he felt he was sorely lacking. Your attitude was refreshing, and despite your circumstances, you never acted like a damsel in need of his help. 

In a different life, in another world, maybe you two could have met as equals, not painfully stuck to the rules of an unfair, unforgiving reality. You’d be each other's foil; you, the impassioned dreamer with as many thoughts and ideas as there were stars in the sky, and he the realist, who didn’t dim your light but tempered it into a steady, sustainable flame.

You’d take him out on adventures, out of the strict box of his comfort zone, and he’d ground you more firmly to reality, never discouraging your dreams but making sure you took the necessary steps in the right way, responsibly. You'd match one another perfectly, complementary and meant for each other. 

But that’s not your reality, and you both know it. There would never be any coming back from this if you go through with it, and there’s no ideal, happy future for you two to share. “I’m not so disillusioned to think this would be anything other than sex for you,” you continue, and he swallows, mind still racing impossibly, “but it’d be much more meaningful for me with you than some bastard I don’t like in the slightest.” 

You’re wrong. So wrong, and you don’t even know it. It would never be “just sex” with you. You mean much, much more to him than you even realize. “You won’t regret asking a man like me? There’d be no taking it back once it’s done,” Minho can’t help but ask, rationality and reason desperately trying to gain control. 

Despite what your father may believe, you’re a grown woman capable of making your own decisions. And this is a decision you make with full knowledge of what it means for you, more than willing to accept whatever consequences may arise for committing such a sin.

In an ideal world, you’d be allowed to love who you wish, live where you wish, do what you wish. But this isn’t an ideal world, and if there is only one thing you can ever be granted in this life that feels as if it isn’t even your own, it would be this– to have one night, just one night, where you can be the person you want to be, with Minho by your side.

“You’re free to reject me if you’re not attracted to me, but.. My only regret would have been not trying. So I ask, are you not attracted to me?” He looks you over carefully following your question, grip on the armrests tightening.

Admitting that he’s attracted to you may as well be a death sentence. But he can’t lie to you, completely at your mercy. Fuck the king, it’s you he’s really loyal to. All he’s ever done, all he ever will do, it’s always for you. He’s always tried to act in your best interest, to do the right thing, to keep you safe and protected. But does keeping you safe even matter if you’re miserable? 

“I am,” Minho swallows, answering honestly despite his better judgment, “You have no idea how attracted to you I am.”

“So why hesitate?” you ask, fingers trail down your lap, over your knees, to where the very bottom of your dress lies. He watches you, eyes darting from your hands back to your face. You’re watching him too, carefully, considering his every reaction before you make your next move, impressively calculated. 

You take the hem of your dress in your hands, pulling it up leisurely, getting it halfway up your thighs before Minho rises from his chair. He's is in front of you in an instant, his hands grabbing your wrists and stopping you from lifting it any further.

“You’re playing a dangerous game, Princess,” he breathes, voice low and strained; he can’t lose control of his desires, but fuck, you’re making it so hard. You look up at him, meeting his gaze with the same fiery determination you always have, but there’s more there than just that this time. Desire, want, need– all for him.

Fuck it. He’s going to get burned, but maybe it’s worth it. You’ll be his funeral pyre, engulfing him in your flame until all that remains are the ashes of the man he was supposed to be. And what a beautiful way to end his life it will be, lost between your thighs, feeling your nails dig and claw at his skin.

He lets go of your wrists, one of his hands coming to cup your face, thumb tracing over your bottom lip. “Has anyone ever kissed you, Princess?” he asks and you give a slight shake of the head, breathing a soft “No..”

He hums, and there’s a twisted sort of pleasure he derives from knowing he’ll be your first in every conceivable way. You’re not “innocent,” he knows you’re not, but there’s something about being your first kiss, your first cock, your first everything that makes him crazy. 

“And you want me to be the first one to kiss you?” he follows up with another question, corners of his mouth threatening to twist into a smile when you nod, a soft, honest “yes” leaving your lips effortlessly. He leans down towards you, keeping your head tilted up so he can easily meet your lips.

He does so softly, treating you with care. His lips are softer than you expected, and the feeling of them against your own fills you with butterflies. He carefully tilts you back, and you let your body fall back onto the mattress, head hitting the surprisingly soft pillows.

Minho crawls over you, spreading your legs apart just enough to get between them, your dress now hiked all the way up your thighs. He’s hovering over you, looking down at you with so much love and lust and that it leaves you speechless. “I’ll need you to listen to me tonight. Can you do that for me?” he asks, pressing light kisses to your jaw, under your ear, your neck. 

You can, because it’s Minho. He’d never hurt you, never try to control you, never make you feel lesser than. So you can listen to him, because you trust him with your care; he’ll take good care of you, you know he will. He smiles when you nod, and you see him smile so rarely that it makes your heart skip a beat; his role always requires him to be so stern and straight faced, that seeing him smile down at you like this is enough to melt you into a puddle. 

“You’re a good girl when you want to be, hmm?” he hums against your neck, resuming his trail of kisses against your skin, and you can’t explain why, but the words and tone he says them in makes your stomach flip.

If you were in a different world, and didn’t have to return home to the castle tomorrow, he’d take his time marking your neck, filling it with pretty shades of blue, purple, and red, sinking his teeth into your soft, supple skin. He just knows you’d look so pretty like that, and the way you react when his breath tickles your skin and his lips linger, tells him you’d like it too.

His fingers trail down your body, finding the hem of your dress and pulling it up over your chest. You lift your back off the bed when he separates from your neck, pulling your dress off the rest of the way and discarding it to the floor. He kisses you as he fiddles with the straps of your bra, effortlessly unhooking it in the back and pulling it down your arms and off your body. 

He may have never married, but he’s no stranger to being with and pleasuring women. And he’ll make sure he makes this a night you’ll always remember for all the right reasons. Capturing your lips in another kiss, his hands take in your now bare breasts, gently kneading and squeezing.

You try to squeeze your legs together, but his place between your thighs stops the act from happening, and he chuckles against your lips when he realizes what you’re doing. “Be patient, Princess, I’ll take good care of you,” he whispers before kissing you again, and you let out a small whine, not knowing exactly what you want but knowing you want something.

You gasp when he takes your nipples between your fingers and pinches them, not too hard of course, but enough to give him the chance to slip his tongue into your mouth. Your body shudders, you feel dizzy with pleasure and excitement, and the feeling of his tongue circling yours is impossibly intoxicating. 

One of his hands travels down, over your stomach, coming between your bodies to feel your heat over your panties. He’s barely even begun and you’re already soaking the fabric, your eager anticipation for more of his touch palpable beyond all else. He nips at your bottom lip, gently tugging it between his teeth before soothing the sting with kitten licks, his hand slipping inside your panties to feel how slick you’ve gotten directly. 

Your body jolts when his fingers run between your folds, and he barely has to move them at all to get his fingers completely coated in your arousal. He pulls back to look at you, taking in the sight of your flushed face and swollen lips, pretty and perfect.

You’re panting, breathless, overwhelmed in the best way possible. You keen when his fingers rub over your clit in circles, your teeth sinking into your bottom lip as you lift your head from the pillows to watch. “Feels good, doesn’t it?” he asks, suppressing a grin when you whine and quickly nod your head.

“Want more, want you,” you mutter, the most timid you’ve ever been in regards to a man. He coos, giving you a sweet kiss as he continues his stimulation to your sensitive spot. “Remember what I said? Patience, Princess, you’ll get what you want. We can’t rush and have you getting hurt, can we?” 

You pout as you concede, and God, he finds that so cute; he’s never seen you actually act shy and pouty before, and it makes him want to give you the entire world. He’ll give you everything you want, anything you ask for, but he’ll have to remember to tease you first so he can see that cute expression on your face before he gives in to your whims.

“I’ll make sure you’re nice and ready for my cock, so just be a good girl and follow my lead until then. You can do that for me easily, can’t you?”Another shy nod, another adorable flushed look that makes his cock throb in his trousers.

It was a little intimidating for you, knowing how experienced Minho must be due to his age, and feeling like you must fall short in comparison to other women– women who knew what they were doing. But really, that was just your own insecurity talking. He didn’t mind at all that you were inexperienced; in fact, it excited him for reasons he didn’t entirely understand. 

Maybe it was the knowledge that he was the first to touch your skin, or maybe that someone as determined and fiery as you are is allowing yourself to concede control, to let him be in charge of your pleasure, trusting him to bring you to utmost bliss. What bigger display of trust could you ever show him? Your glassy, pleading eyes, begging him for more but still waiting for it just as he asked– you’re too good for him. He’s going to ruin you. 

He takes his fingers away, and you have to physically stop yourself from whining at the lack of contact, lest he remind you again about “being patient.” “Open your mouth for me,” Minho requests, and though you are a bit confused, you do as he asks immediately, obeying without question.

Fuck, that’s hot; the image of you, mouth open, tongue slightly sticking out and waiting to receive whatever he gives you is something he never wants to forget. Minho slides two of his fingers into your mouth, instructing you to lick, to get his fingers nice and wet.

Truthfully, you were more than lubricated enough to take his fingers without this step, but he couldn’t resist the urge to see you this way. He pushes his fingers in your mouth down to the knuckle, and you persist with coating them in your saliva even as you gag and tears prick the corners of your eyes. 

He showers you with praise, slipping his fingers out of your mouth when he feels satisfied with the work you’ve done on them, kissing your cheeks, feeling the heat of your face on his lips. Slipping his hand back inside your panties, he presses the tips of his wet fingers to your hole, and you instinctively suck in a breath, body unconsciously tensing from the anticipation.

“You have to relax, Princess, it won’t feel good if you’re tense,” he explains sweetly, shaking his head when you mutter a soft apology. “Don’t be sorry, not for that. Just focus on me, hmm? On this,” he whispers, his lips lingering on yours in a deep, impassioned kiss.

His fingers stay completely still until he feels your body start to release its tension, heeding his advice to focus more on his kisses than the motion of his fingers. He keeps kissing you even as the first of his fingers finally starts to push inside you, and you moan into his mouth, hot pleasure licking your skin. 

He moves his finger in and out slowly, making sure you’re well adjusted before he pushes in another one, hooking his fingers to find that delicious sweet spot he knows will have you crying his name in no time. You gasp loudly when he finds it, your hands twisting the sheets beneath you between your fingers, your entire body trembling.

It feels so good you almost can’t breathe, and when he picks up his pace, hitting your spot over and over as he brings his thumb to your clit, you know you won’t last long at all. “M-Minho, I’m– 'm gonna–” you try to warn him, but the words die in your throat, the pleasure too overwhelming to continue to try and form a sentence.

He simply hums, continuing his motions until your eyes are rolling to the back of your head, sharp, shuddery gasps and moans tumbling from your lips as your orgasm takes you. “That’s it, just let go, just like that, I’ve got you,” he praises, pressing kisses to your hot skin, helping you ride out your high.

Before you can even fully recollect your breath and get your racing heart back under control, he’s pushing a third finger inside, the trembling in your body intensifying from the addition. “You need more to get ready for me,” he tells you, and in your fucked out state all you can do is nod, taking his word as gospel truth, “need to stretch you good to make sure my cock fits.”

All you can do is lay there and take the onslaught of pleasure, unable to think of about anything other than how full and good his fingers make you feel. You don’t even register that he’s moved your down your body and tugged your panties to the side until his tongue is meeting your clit, swirling around it in expertly practiced circles, making you desperately cry out his name.

Your fingers tangle in his hair, tugging harshly as your hips buck up to keep feeling the delicious sensation his tongue provides you. He flattens his tongue and lets you grind against it as you want, the motions of his fingers not stuttering or ceasing despite the movement of your hips. 

You feel the familiar heat pooling your stomach, another orgasm approaching quickly, the sounds you release turning into desperate whines and whimpers as you chase the feeling. It only takes a few more rolls of your hips and thrusts of his fingers to have you releasing all over his face and gushing around his fingers.

He sits up and pulls his fingers out when your body falls limp, chest heaving and ears ringing as you try to recover from the mind-blowing experience you just had. Your eyes are closed, and you can feel his weight shift, can hear the soft clink of his belt unbuckling, followed by the rustling of clothes.

You open your eyes to see Minho’s cock is now out, his hand lazily pumping it and spreading the pre-cum that accumulated and dripped over his time focusing on you. You reach a hand out to touch it, to replace his hand with your own, but he grabs your hand before you can, instead making you intertwine your fingers. 

“Tonight’s all about you, Princess. Don’t worry about taking care of me,” he says, kissing the back of your hand and then holding it down right above your head. You’re not quite pinned, easily able to snake your hand out of his hold if you wanted to, but you have to admit, you like the feeling of his hand keeping yours held down.

He rubs his cock between your folds before he lines himself up with your entrance, though you didn’t miss the subtle smirk on his face when you whined from the feeling of his tip rubbing against your clit. “Squeeze my hand if you need to,” Minho tells you before taking your free hand and bringing it up to his shoulder, “and hold onto me.”

Your heart squeezes in your chest; the hidden romantic in you yearns to tell him you love him, to thank him for taking such good care of you, to express how you never want this night to end, but you know that would be a mistake. Neither of you can afford to let your emotions spill out, so you swallow them down the best you can, deciding to just live in this moment, to experience it for all that it is and all that it means for you.

The initial push is slow, and thanks to his diligent preparation, there is little physical pain or discomfort you experience from the stretch of his cock. A slight sting, sure, but nothing you can’t easily handle, and it’s barely even recognizable when compared to the pleasant fullness you feel. So when you squeeze his hand, and your eyes well with tears, it’s not because you are pained; it’s because you finally have something you want, a happiness you thought would forever elude you.

He takes his free hand and wipes away the tears from your eyes, a soft look of concern on his face. “Hurts?” he asks, but you shake your head quickly.

“Feels good, I just– I..” you struggle with the words, knowing you can’t express how you actually feel about him even if you felt you could. “I know. You don’t have to say it, I know,” Minho speaks to you softly, and the kiss he gives you very nearly makes you sob.

There’s still a few inches left before he’s fully inside you, and he pushes the remainder in slowly as he continues to kiss you, his free hand now rubbing soothing circles on your hip with his thumb. Minho does well at maintaining composure, staying firmly in control of himself and his body despite the way your walls squeeze and suck him in, despite the way you whimper when you feel him throb, or cry out against his lips when his tip kisses your deepest spots.

“That’s a good girl, taking all I give you, doing so well,” he praises you some more, and you love when he tells you how good you’re doing if the way you clench around him is any indicator. “Fuck, Princess–” he groans when he finally starts to move, pulling out and pressing back in much more slowly than he normally would, but the wet friction you provide him is delicious.

“Minho, I–” you start, interrupted by a sharp gasp when he finds your sweet spot with his cock.He looks at you as he stills his hips, patiently waiting for you to continue in case what you have to say is important, or a request for him to stop.

You swallow, face heating up but determined to get out what you want to say. “J-Just this once, I don’t want to be the princess. Call me by name, please–” Oh, that’s what you want? He can do that, easily; he’s already groaned your name countless times in the privacy of his room, stroking his cock to the thought of you.

The sound of your name falling from his lips as he resumes the thrust of his hips has you clenching hard, stars erupting in your vision as he picks up his pace, beginning to quickly and mercilessly hit your spot, over and over again. He takes one of your legs and props it up over his shoulder, allowing more of his cock to fill you up, the creaking of the bed and the sound of skin slapping beginning to overpower the noise from downstairs.

Taking his other hand away from yours, you’ll have to forgive him, he licks his fingers and then brings them to your clit, wanting nothing more than to see and feel you release on his cock. It only takes a few more thrusts and circles from his fingers to have you crying out his name as you cum, fingers digging into the sheets beneath you as your body shakes and legs tremble.

But Minho hasn’t cum yet, so he’s not quite done with you– not that you mind in the slightest. You’ll let him chase his pleasure as long as he wishes, even if it leaves you a drooling, fucked out mess in the end.

He pulls out of you, just long enough to sit against the headboard, and then he’s pulling you on top of him, guiding you to sink back down on his cock and sit fully in his lap. The new position has you rolling your eyes to the back of your head, Minho guiding the movement of your hips with his hands as he thrusts up into you.

He’s quite literally doing all the work, but that’s perfectly fine; this night is supposed to be about you, after all, and he doesn’t want you to lift a pretty little finger. Just let him use you a little until he cums, that’s all he needs.

You’re panting against his neck, head laid on his shoulder and nails digging into the skin of his back beneath his shoulder blades. The sting of your nails in his skin is just how he imagined it to be, and his head is falling back against the headboard, low grunts and groans of your name leaving freely as his cock throbs and twitches, getting closer and closer to his release.

He uses one of his hands to grab your face and lift it up to his, crashing his lips to yours in a desperate, impassioned display of love and lust. A few more snaps of his hips and you feel his cum spurting inside you in long, thick ropes, the sensation sending you forward into yet another orgasm of your own, your desperate sounds muffled only by Minho’s mouth on yours.

Your body collapses against his when the moment slows to a stop, both of your chests heaving and breaths heavy as you lie against him. His arms wrap around you snuggly, and keep you upright against his chest. You can hear the quick, erratic beating of his heart as he catches his breath, looking up at him to see his eyes closed and sweat trailing down his brow towards his cheek.

He looks beautiful like this, you think; you hope he thought the same of you. Even as his cock starts to soften, neither of you move, and though your legs protest and beg to be stretched out, you refuse to leave your spot on Minho’s lap.

“Are you alright, Princess?” he asks once he’s collected himself, pushing your hair from your face and wiping the sweat from your brow.

“Mhm, just want to stay like this,” you reply, and Minho smiles softly, rubbing over your shoulders and down your back in a sweet gesture of comfort. You’re silent like this for some time, just simply enjoying the feeling of him, the sound of the crackling fire, the warmth he and this room provides you.

“Does my happiness really have to end here?” you can’t help but quietly ask, and Minho is quiet for a moment, carefully considering before he speaks.

In a different world, in a different time, in a different place, maybe the two of you are meant to be. There’s comfort in imagining yourself there, truly happy with Minho, letting him care for you while not snuffing out the flame that is your pride, ambition, and spirit.

It’s not meant to be, you both know that to be true. To be with each other required great risk, sacrifice, hardship. But again he has to wonder, is being safe worth the cost of happiness? Would you even truly be “alive” if your every moment was spent miserably?

He doesn’t want to see the very core of what makes you you be snuffed out by selfish, idiotic men and their expectations of what you should be. You’re much younger than him, and it would be impossible for him to be there for you for the rest of your life, but he can be for the rest of his, at least.

“Maybe not,” he answers, unsure of what the future holds for the two of you, but not entirely ready to give up so easily. He could accept his fate, accept that love is something out of his reach, but it’s your happiness on the line that makes him want to fight for it. 

There’s a lot he could lose by helping you escape this life you feel trapped in, but he’d rather see you happy than wasting your days away in the castle, subservient to a man you loathe. Your love isn’t meant to be, but that’s okay; he’ll help you all the same.

He’s loyal to you, and only you, he’s decided– so if you make your future husband, your father, or even the entire kingdom your enemy, then they’ll be his enemy too. And it’ll all be worth it just to see you smile for a little bit longer.

[admirxation]

Pathetic | Leon S. Kennedy oneshot

pairing: sub! re2 stepbro! leon s. kennedy x fem!reader (afab)

summary: the reader and leon always hated each other, ever since her mother and his father decided to merge the families. one night, when the reader gets ready for a date, her and leon find out a secret desire both of them have been hiding.

word count: 2.5k

disclaimer: this is a work of fiction! i do not condone everything i write, my writing doesn’t reflect all my morals. if any of the following warnings trigger or make you feel uncomfortable, scroll away; you are in charge of what content you’re consuming. this work is 18+ only, minors are strongly advised not to interact.

warnings: NSFW 18+ content. female anatomy and she/her pronouns used for reader. detailed smut: stepcest, dominance and submission, f stepping on m, degrading (m receiving), unprotected sex, p in v, oral sex (m receiving), tasting cum, hair pulling, tit play, and creampie.

The day of your mother and Leon’s father’s wedding was when you two needed to get along, but that wouldn’t happen. You two went to the same high school, hating one another; it was the most ironic and hilarious moment when you had to start living together. Everyone in the school always commented on how funny it was, constantly asking what it was like to be siblings and commenting on how you needed to “end the war” and befriend one another.

But like everyone with a sibling, arguments got worse between you, but this didn’t stop your parents' union. You remembered wearing that frilly pink dress, unflattering and too big on you, but it was what your mother wanted. Standing with the other bride’s maids, you kept death-staring Leon — him reciprocating — and you both knew the arguments and fighting would be a part of your life.

You were both in your early twenties now, saving up to move out; your parents desperately wanted both of you gone, the constant fighting was getting too much, and they wanted to spend more quality time with each other.

For the weekend, your parents — well, your mother and the man she married — were away for an anniversary, something they would do every year, leaving the house for just you and Leon. Right now, you were getting dressed and putting on your favourite skirt and fishnet stockings, getting ready for your date; you were going to meet a guy off Tinder. You wanted to take every opportunity to go on as many dates as possible, parties, and have as much fun as possible, planning to invite your date to stay the night if things went well. While thinking about your date, you were putting on your eyeliner while your favourite music was blasting from your phone; the music connecting to the speaker to annoy Leon, laughing to yourself every time you heard him shout: “Turn it off!”.

You knew you got under his skin when you heard heavy footsteps coming closer to your room, preparing yourself for another argument; Leon burst through the doors as you finished your eyeliner, giving him a smug look as he stared at you in frustration.

“Do you need to play it that loud?” you nodded, pulling your speaker closer so he couldn’t turn it off.

“I’m trying to play a game with Chris.”

You turned it down, only to speak to him, planning to turn it back on right after he left: “If it’s that much of a problem, go to his house… I need you gone for tonight anyway, inviting Mason over.”

“Ah, another guy… Sounds like something I can tell Mom and Dad,” he always tried to scare you, but it wasn’t going to work, your mother was always forgiving of everything you did, and Leon’s father was always trying to win you over — “the favourite” was the best way to describe you.

“Think about it for a moment; they never believe you,” Leon looked to the ground when knowing your words had the truth, “Now… Please leave me alone, I don’t want to see your face when I return.”

“Whatever, continue being a slut for all I care,” he turned around to leave the room.

Your eyes widened; you knew you had a different style but didn’t think Leon would insult you that way.

“Fuck you!” you exclaimed; before Leon knew it, you pushed him to the ground, wincing in pain as the carpet scraped along his arms, looking at you with fear, “Listen here, you little twirp, don’t you dare call me that again, or I’ll make you regret it!” anger lingering in your words, Leon continuing to look at you with fear as you stepped on his chest, feeling his breathing quicken as you continued to shout as him and put him in his place.

You were about to lift your foot away from his chest, looking at him all scared and vulnerable, looking down and seeing there was an imprint on his sweatpants; as you looked down, Leon blushed with embarrassment; he had tried to keep it in and not let you see it.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” this only made you step harder onto Leon’s chest, making his breathing quiver under your control, “How pathetic… You’re getting hard for your little sister.”

You witnessed him squirm as you pressed more force onto him, seeing him get harder.

“Y-yes, fine, I have… liked you for a while… I never hated you… P-please, can you get off me? You’re hurting me,” you thought momentarily, deciding to show him some mercy, lifting the pressure off him and seeing him prop himself upright as he looked at you — still hard and showing an imprint on his sweatpants.

“You’re a disgusting little pervert, aren’t you?” a smirk crept on your face as you folded your arms.

While calling him all the names under the sun, this excited you. You had to admit Leon was extremely attractive and you hated admitting it. Eating at the same table as him and having your bedroom next to his was too much; falling under the illusion that you hated him was easier than admitting to the dark fantasies of wanting your stepbrother to fuck you.

Having these thoughts spiral through your head as you stood there, looking into Leon’s blue eyes — it was interrupted by a ping on your phone. Returning to your room and hearing Leon slowly follow you, wanting more and more. Your eyes glanced over your phone, seeing that Mason decided to flake on you; he gave you some excuse of having a headache; you just rolled your eyes— you weren’t disappointed and knew it would just be another deleted contact. Turning around as you placed your phone back on the table, you saw Leon standing in the doorway, messing with the long sleeves of his shirt and looking down while blushing.

“What do you want?” you asked.

“Well… It seems like you’re going to be free,” Leon could sense something had happened with the lack of agency to walk out the door, “I, um, I was wondering —”

You raised an eyebrow: “You want to fuck me, don’t you?” It wasn’t hard to read him like a book; he was practically desperate for your touch again, still hard from your degrading actions.

Like you, Leon was always attracted to you; how couldn’t he? You were beautiful; all the guys in high school wanted to be with you. Every time you would wear any outfit that exposed some skin drove him crazy, he could control himself throughout the day, but when everyone was asleep, he locked his bedroom door and started touching himself to the thought of you, slowly caressing his cock to the image of your cleavage or whatever was on show — wanting more than just a thought. This was when he could get the “more” and finally live his most profound and darkest fantasies with you. Was he ashamed? Of course, he was; who wants to admit they want to fuck their step-sister? But he felt his attraction slowly overtake him. You never made it easy with the outfits or walking to your room and going past his door in nothing but a towel, leaving Leon to wonder what it would be like if that towel just dropped, just once — he was disgusted with himself.

“Please… You already know the effect you have on me… I need you,” hearing those words made you wet; hearing his pleas and seeing him all desperate and vulnerable, you liked that you had the upper hand.

You moved closer to him, hearing his breathing shallow as he got more nervous — his blushing cheeks giving it all away — pressing your hand on his imprint and feeling how big he was under those sweatpants.

“Do you like it?” you asked as you continuously moved your hand along his length.

He nodded and looked down at you, seeing your exposed cleavage with his height towering over you; he then moved his hand on your cheek, moving into a passionate and lustful kiss. It was wrong, disgusting, all the words you could use, but you couldn’t deny how wet it made you, feeling your clit pulsate and beg for his cock to ram itself inside you. Before you knew it, Leon moved his hands, grazing your ass and reaching your thighs.

You stopped him momentarily: “Did I give you permission to touch me like that, Leon?” he shook his head, his cock twitching with pleasure the more you controlled him.

“Get on the bed,” you demanded.

Leon followed suit, lying on your bed, waiting for you to join him. You removed your top, exposing your chest covered by a bra, making Leon stare at your beautiful body that was only covered with a skirt, fishnets, and bra now. You started to crawl towards him on the bed, getting on top of him and meeting his blue eyes that communicated his desperation for you; you started to grind your hips, grinding and feeling his large cock underneath his pants, yearning to be exposed so it could finally see what you felt like. You traced your fingers from his yaw down to the band of his pants, feeling him shake as he anticipated what you would do next.

“What do you want me to do to you, Leon?” you said seductively, rubbing his clothed cock, distracting him as he thought.

“Whatever you want, I just… I just need you so much right now,” he said breathlessly; you smirked at his vulnerability, knowing precisely what you wanted to do with him first.

You moved down, your fingers gripping the band of his pants, seeing his cock spring up as it was exposed in front of you; Leon gasped as the cold air hit his skin; both of you blushing as you saw the precum that had already lingered on the tip of his cock. You traced the tip of your finger on it, feeling the tacky liquid on your finger as you moved it to your tongue, making Leon bush harder as he saw you lick it and taste him for the first time.

“Oh fuck,” you heard Leon say under his breath, seeing how beautiful and sexy you were.

You then swirled your tongue on his tip, being met with Leon wincing in pleasure, not breaking eye contact as you turned the twirling into your mouth taking more of his length; you loved hearing Leon moan, hearing the way he said your name as you gave him the best pleasure he had ever had. You moved your mouth up and down, Leon interlocking his fingers in your soft hair, gently moving your head down and loving how you looked as your eyes met his.

“You’re so good at this,” Leon uttered as his fingers started to caress your cheek, looking at you like you belonged to him.

It was hypnotic to look at you, the way you made Leon shake and curl his toes as he tried not to cum too fast — even though he was desperate to see what you would look like with his cum all over your face — he wanted to make sure he felt your walls surround his cock before he released himself.

“Oh my… fuck… Please let me fuck you already; I need to know what you feel like,” his breathing became more laboured.

You moved your mouth away from his cock, it glistening wet from your actions, watching him as he propped himself upright to meet your face, inches away from your lips. He moved into another wet kiss — not caring what you had previously done — you moved your fingers into his hair, gently tugging and hearing Leon softly groan as you made him endure more pain.

“I love seeing you squirm like that,” you said between kisses.

Leon continued to connect his lips to yours desperately, his hands trailing behind your back as he tried to remove your bra; you couldn’t help but smile as you felt the failed attempts until you finally heard the unclasping sound. He threw your bra out of the way, it landing across the room; Leon then took the opportunity to move his warm hand on your breast and squeeze it hardly; you moaned as he groped you, feeling his thumb circle your erect nipple.

“Can you please get on all fours, please,” Leon politely asked; you couldn’t help but love how he asked.

You followed his wishes, twirling your body into an all-fours position arching your back and exposing your thong to Leon, making him blush even more. His fingers laced around your inner thighs, making you shudder as he approached your wet centre.

“Should I be careful with your stockings or —” you cut him off.

“Just rip them… I don’t care, just get on with it,” you were eager and longing for Leon.

His fingers interlocked in the holes of your stockings, pulling them apart and creating a massive ripped hole, moving your thong over to the side and revealing your wet glistening pussy — making his cock twitch and release another pooling of precum. At first, he started to rub his cock along your soaking slit, making you get more desperate, biting your lip in anticipation.

“Can’t believe you wanna fuck your little sister’s pussy, Leon,” you wanted to tease and humiliate him, knowing he liked the degrading.

He liked it, showing you this by pushing his tip slowly inside you, making your breathing quicken, and finally pushing his whole cock inside your wet and swollen cunt, and gasping. As he continued to push himself, you screamed his name, grabbing fistfuls of the blanket.

“Oh fuck, Leon!” you couldn’t keep your moans in as you tried to get used to his size, loving the feeling of his length moving through your walls.

“You’re so tight, fuck,” Leon continued to groan, trying his best to control himself, getting more difficult as your walls tightly surrounded his member.

All the tension between you two had been building up for ages — finally getting released in the pleasure you were giving one another — lost in the ecstasy of each other bodies colliding together in an orgasmic union.

“You’re so pathetic,” you degraded him even more, Leon moving his cock quicker as you kept giving him what you wanted, “Such a little pervert,” you continued as you looked back to Leon’s face that was plastered with a red tint of blush.

He continued to push his cock harder inside you, feeling and hearing how wet you were because of him, his nails digging into your skin.

“Leon, I’m going to cum, don’t stop!” you moaned loudly.

“Please, please cum for your big brother,” his grip on your ass got harder, knowing bruises would form from how he dug his nails in you, his movements gaining a sense of urgency in his quick pace.

You released yourself all over Leon’s cock; him loving how it felt and seeing it trickle down and glaze his members and your inner thighs; this happened because his touch made your release easier. He finally came inside you, making you roll your eyes to the back of your head as you felt warmth pool inside you. You were both breathless, collapsing on the bed and Leon sitting beside you.

“Looks like you’re good at some things… You’re not entirely useless,” you teased him.”

“I-I can show more of what I can do,” he stuttered.

my links: masterlist | kofi

[mommalosthermind]

Hey book mom im hovring on if i wanna try writing a fanfiction, because partially its smut, but also deals with mentions of underage sex, noncon, (in a bad way) and is also set in a grimdark. Also because i dont know if taking on another project rn is a good thing (part of me thinks it is, because itd be a good alternative to whern im spent on coding). I'm also fighitng the repressed catholic boy in my head bc its yknow, smut. Was looking for your thoughts

My thoughts are do what you want, what makes you feel good, as much as you can. Go forth and make things because you want to.

If the story that’s itching the inside of your head is dark, then write it dark. If you throw it out into the world on places like ao3, it takes only a moment to tag it properly so folks can navigate and curate their reading experiences.

[and since I still get the occasional complaint about my censorship rant re:tagging ‘chose not to use warnings’ is an appropriate tag! That tag is a warning all by itself and any reader who chooses to open a link with it accepts up front they are venturing into the unknown. What’s in the bag? Might be a dove, might not. Are you willing to risk it? That’s on the reader, not the author.]

Alternating projects is a time honored creative insanity loop. It’s a good way to feel like you’re still making progress on *something* despite feelings stuck somewhere else, and tends to give the brain a lot of beneath-the-waves kind of time to think about whatever made you annoyed with the first thing. Absolutely give it an ago. Side effects include entirely too many goddamn projects being hoarded like you’re a tiny dragon but also less overall burn out, since you’re cycling through interests. …and if you’re me, that translates to ending up with *squints* eleventy billion stories you wanna tell. Very slowly. Very very slowly. Progress is still progress if it’s spread across projects.

I can’t speak much to repressed Catholicism other than the bog-standard ‘everyone in the USA is culturally christian in the most bonkers way’ but writing seems like a solid place to start working through the box standardized religion crams folk into. Writing is therapy. You’re allowed to like things. You’re allowed to like things other people don’t. There is no inherent morality to fiction; it’s paper dolls and what-if’s and ‘wouldn’t this be fucked up actually?’

Write the smut. Write the darkness. Write the things that make people, that make *you* uncomfortable. And when the voices start trying to chide you, well, maybe point out that it seems like their kink is shaming other people and that’s not your problem.

[moon-light-jukebox]

Germs [Reid x Reader]

this gif isn’t mine

Summary: Reader is sure the resident BAU genius doesn’t like her, but she’s not sure why. But even if he did like her, he’s a germaphobe, so he wouldn’t be comfortable with the things she wants to do to him...would he?

Pairing: Spencer Reid / (Female) Reader

Word Count: 5.6k

Rating: Mature 

Category: Fluff and Smut 

Content Warning: Brief mentions of torture and violence, usually criminal minds stuff, nothing explicit. Light choking, oral sex (female receiving), penetrative sex, fingering, language (maybe?) 

A/n: I have come out of fan fiction writing retirement for this one. Let me know what y’all think!  masterlist

y/n - your name

y/l/n - your last name

italicized text is Reader’s sassy inner thoughts

---

I’m not sure if I believe in hell, but if there is a hell, I’m sure it feels exactly like Louisiana in July. Every time I walked outside I felt like I was walking into soup. Gross. I couldn’t help but feel guilty over my sigh of relief when I walked back into the local precinct the team was currently working out of. Young women are dying, and I’m worried about a little bit of heat.

But, fuck, it was hot.

Speaking of heat, I thought as I threw open the door to the conference room only to run smack into the hottest thing I’d ever encountered.

“Shit,” I exclaimed before I thought better of it. “I’m so sorry.” I ran my eyes up, up, up, all the way up his body until I met his eyes; those beautiful honey brown eyes that threatened to have me acting like an idiot if I stared into them for too long.  

Dr. Spencer Reid’s cheeks were tinged pink, his posture stiff, his fingers clutching the file he was carrying for dear life. “Don’t worry about it, Y/n,” he sounded uncomfortable, which made my stomach drop. “My fault.” With that, he quickly maneuvered around me and headed off to complete whatever genius task he had to complete.

My eyes followed him until he was out of sight before I mentally shook myself. ‘C’mon, this is pointless,’ I thought. ‘He doesn’t even like you.’ Which I really thought was true, the good doctor went out of his way to avoid me whenever possible. ‘Plus, he’s a germaphobe.’ This thought was confirmed true. He didn’t shake people’s hands, the only people I’d seen him touch during my time at the BAU were members of the team that he’d known for years, and some of those even seemed reluctant.

Admittedly, I didn’t know a lot about germaphobia; since I couldn’t ask the only genius I knew, I did the next logical thing. I googled it. Every person I’d read about seemed to experience germaphobia differently. Some people could have sex, but others were grossed out by the very idea. Knowing my luck, Spencer Reid and his beautiful hands, and his soulful eyes, and his cheekbones that could cut glass was in the repulsed by sex category. Which is fine! Right, it is fine to not be interested in sex; the only problem was I was very interested in every part of him.  

Maybe he thinks I’m gross. Maybe I stink? Maybe he’s just repulsed by my very presence. Regardless, I couldn’t see Spencer Reid ever shoving me against a wall and fucking me senseless.

I sighed, making my way over to the conference table, pulling out a chair before I flopped into it. I could feel the exhaustion settling into my bones. We had been in Louisiana for almost a week now and we were still no closer to finding our unsub. He was a white man, he worked in a lower-paying job, and he hated women. Obviously, that didn’t narrow it down much.

The unsub was targeting women in clubs and bars, following them outside before he bashed them on the back of the head. After that, he threw the girls over his shoulder and took them to his car; he moved them to a secondary location before he tortured them. The first two victims had survived. They were traumatized, but they were fighters; they both said the same things, ‘he kept my eyes covered the entire time,’ “I never saw his face,’ ‘I did whatever he told me to do.’

We thought the killing of the third victim had been an accident, but that accident had excited our guy enough that he changed his ritual; the killing was crucial now. We had 4 bodies, 2 live victims that couldn’t tell us anything, and no leads.

Sighing, I leaned forward, bringing the heels of my hands to my eyes. I hated feeling helpless. The answer to who this fucker was is in this evidence somewhere and I will find it. If it’s the last thing I do.

The doors swung open again, pulling me from my thoughts. Hotch lead the parade of people, followed by Morgan, JJ, and Dr. Reid. Our unit chef looked gravely serious…not that that necessarily meant anything, in the 6 months I’d been with the behavioral analysis unit I hadn’t seen him have any other expression.

Morgan pulled out his phone, hitting what I suspected was speed dial number 1. “Hey baby girl,” he said, without his usual swagger; even he was tired. “You’re on speaker. You’ve got me, Hotch, JJ, Reid, and Y/l/n.”

“And I have the always wonderful Emily Prentiss, and the dashing David Rossi on the line, effectively putting my favorite people together again, as they should be,” Garcia quipped. I don’t think she meant to include me in her list of ‘favorite people,’ but it made me smile anyway. “Okay, crime fighters, what’s the play?”

“We’re still no closer to finding the unsub,” Hotch began. “He’s highly organized, methodical, and paranoid; but he hasn’t killed in 3 days, this is a break from his escalation pattern. He’s going to strike soon.” Hotch leaned over resting his palms on the shiny fake wood of the conference table. “Our best chance is to send an agent out there as bait.” There was a general murmur of agreement before he continued on. “Garcia, we need you to find all of the night clubs, bars, and whatever else you can think of in the updated comfort zone.”

The sound of keys clicking made its way through the speaker. “Assuming we’re excluding the places he’s already hit, that leaves us with 3 possibilities.”

“So far he hasn’t struck a place twice,” Prentiss chimed in. “Do we think he’s going to hold to that pattern?”

Reid moved over to the board where the map of the county was displayed. “I think so. This guy is too careful to risk going to a place where he’s been before. The chance of him being recognized is too great, especially when everyone is on high alert.” He gestured to the area he had circled on the map. “His pattern seems to be focusing in on this center point right here,” he said, placing a pin in the map. “This area means something. Garcia, what is the closest club or bar to the intersection of Washington Avenue and Harrison Street?”

“That would beeeeee…The Blue Fox.”

“That’s where he’ll be,” Dr. Reid said confidently, his eyes moving to Hotch’s face.

The older man nodded. “It’s our best lead so far, we have to run with it.”

“It’s Friday night,” Rossi pointed out. “We’ll have to act soon.”

Hotch nodded, seeming to be lost in thought. “We need to send agents in there tonight. We know the victims were all on dates or flirting with a man right before their abduction. He targets women that are happy with their companions then waits til he can separate them.”

“Who are you planning on sending in, Hotch?’ JJ questioned.

“Y/l/n is the youngest, she fits the build of the previous victims the best.” His heavy gaze rested on me. “What do you think?”

Like it was even a choice. “I’m in.”

Hotch nodded, accepting my answer. “Good. You’ll partner with Reid.”

“What?!” I squawked, much to my embarrassment. I cleared my throat before I continued. “But, Reid and I…I just thought Morgan would be the obvious choice.” Fuck, I’m just digging a bigger hole.

Morgan gave me an easy smile. “You’re just saying that because you wanna see my moves, little mama.”

Hotch cleared his throat, bringing our attention back. “Morgan is too intimidating; the unsub might not move in if he feels too threatened. You’ll go with Reid.” When he was met with silence he continued on, “alright, let’s get to work.”

-

And that is how I wound up in a club in Louisiana on a Friday night, in a tight black dress, with Spencer Reid beside me. After he walked into the club holding my hand. He doesn’t hold hands, I cringed internally at the thought. He must feel so uncomfortable.

He waved the bartender over, ordering a drink for me and a water for himself before turning to me. “I thought a drink would loosen you up a bit. You look nervous.”

I am nervous. “Right. Thanks.” I drummed my fingers on the bar, my gaze sweeping around the club for anyone who seemed out of place and especially creepy. Most lone men at clubs and bars were creepy, but we need especially creepy.

“Is that because you don’t think I can have your back?”

My head snapped back around. “What?”

Spencer paused to accept the drinks from the bartender, sliding him the money. “In the conference room. You seemed upset that Morgan wasn’t going to be your partner,” he stated matter-of-factly. “Is that because you think I wouldn’t have your back?”

Fuck. I blushed to the roots of my hair. “No, Spencer! God no! It’s not that, I know you’d have my back.” I took a sip of my drink before I said anything else. “It’s just that…you don’t seem to like me very much, and I know you have a thing about germs, and I thought maybe that’s why you didn’t like me.” I was babbling; I was absolutely babbling. “I just didn’t want you to be uncomfortable, that’s all. Morgan has never seemed uncomfortable around me, so…” I trailed off lamely.

The corners of his lips quirked up in amusement. “So, you didn’t want to partner with me on this because you didn’t want me to be uncomfortable?”

I nodded, fidgeting with the straw in my drink.

Spencer moved closer to me, his right hand coming to rest on the small of my back. He seemed as calm as he could be, meanwhile I suddenly had trouble breathing.

It’s for the case. He has to do this for the case. Calm down.

"What do my issues with germs have to do with this?" he wondered, leaning closer to me. I could feel his breath on my neck; my skin broke out in goosebumps.

Double fuck. “Well, we’re supposed to be…together. And you think I’m gross. What if you have to kiss me?” TRIPLE FUCK. “Not that we’d have to kiss,” I tried to backpedal. “But we might, you never know. And I just didn’t…I don’t want you to dislike me more than you do.”

The teasing smile slipped from his face, the fingers on my lower back flexing slightly. He regarded me with a tilt of his head. "You're serious?" At my shaky nod, he continued. "Y/n, I don't think you're gross."

“You don’t?” I squeaked.

He lifted his hand from my back then, sliding it up to my shoulder, his free hand moving from the bar to rest on my hip. Spencer brushed my hair back before he leaned forward. Slowly, slowly, slowly, I felt his lips touch the tender skin of my neck. My eyes fluttered shut, unable to suppress a gasp at the contact. Spencer Reid’s beautiful lips slid down to the place where my neck and shoulder met, then I felt his teeth nip the skin before he placed another kiss there. He worked his way back up towards my ear, the hand on my hip moving slightly so he was almost grabbing my ass. “I don’t think you’re gross,” he breathed, causing me to shudder. I could hear the smirk in his voice. “Germs don’t bother me in that way, especially around people I know. I wouldn’t have a problem kissing you, baby.”

I was going to need new panties after this. Spencer Reid, awkward, sweet, Dr. Spencer Reid just called me Baby.

“…Oh.” Really, y/n. Oh; you went with oh?

The good doctor pulled back, his face close enough to mine that I could see that he had freckles under his eyes and that those beautiful eyes got more golden towards the center. "Oh."

-

Michael Watkins was the name of our unsub. He was a short white man with a receding hairline and a bad temper. His last relationship had ended 3 months before the first attack; Spencer was right to pick this bar. Shortly after he tried to make my pussy combust with his neck kisses, Reid suggested I walk to the bathroom, assuring me he’d be watching if anyone followed.

Watkins’ hand was in my hair, dragging me outside before I made it to the ladies’ room. I felt a jolt of fear as I struggled to escape, strands of hair being ripped from my head. I shouldn’t have worried, because no sooner had the outside door opened than I heard the velvety voice of Derek Morgan. “FBI! Put your hands where we can see them.”

He attempted to run. Why would anyone try to run from Derek Morgan?  

After the medics confirmed I was okay, I was sent back to the hotel while the rest of the team went with the local police to book Watkins and try to get a full confession.

“Good work,” Hotch said, his hand clapping down on my shoulder.

The highest praise I’ll ever need.

I hopped into the shower right when I got back to my room, not wanting Watkins’ touch on me for a moment longer.

Spencer’s touch, however,…That was a touch I wouldn’t mind having on me. But he’d barely looked at me once he made it outside. I knew he was being affectionate in there because of the case, we were playing a role. I knew that. I still couldn’t stop the twinge of hurt I felt.

But he doesn’t think I’m gross. That had to count for something.

I had just got done blow drying my hair enough so that it wouldn’t look too crazy when I woke up when there was a knock on my door. Figuring it was Emily, I didn't consider the fact that I was in my pajamas, and my face was scrubbed free of makeup.  

It wasn’t Emily. Spencer Reid stood on the other side of my door, his eyes running down my body before he met my bewildered stare again. “You look comfy,” he commented with that damn little smile on his lips again.

“Oh. Yeah. I took a shower.” Way to go, y/n, you’re really killing it tonight.

“I see that,” he said, his cheeks going a little bit pink. “Can I come in? I thought we should talk.” Was he nervous? Why would he be nervous?

I ushered him in, shutting the door behind him. He sat on the bottom edge of my bed; his body angled towards the headboard. I briefly debated about where to sit before I joined him. Don’t make it weird, y/n.

He cleared his throat before he began. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable tonight. I just wanted to make sure we got the guy.”

Right. “Oh, it’s okay, Spencer. I get it. I wasn’t uncomfortable.” I picked at the frayed edge of my sleep shorts, my eyes dropping so he didn’t see anything on my face that betrayed how I was feeling; you can’t be too careful around profilers.

His hand reached out to cover my own fidgeting hands, one of his hands covering both of mine. His hands were so big. His fingers were so long, the veins in his hands were so pronounced. I bet those fingers would feel really – FOCUS.

“I’m also sorry you thought I didn’t like you.” His thumb had started to move slowly over the back of my hand. “I do like you. I like you a lot, actually. I just…” I brought my gaze back up to meet his eyes. “I just get nervous sometimes.”

“You didn’t seem nervous in the club.”

“No,” he chuckled. “I wasn’t nervous then because it was my job. I wasn’t worried about misreading a signal…doing the wrong thing…I’m not the best with social cues.” I had noticed that about him before. “But I am a really good profiler.” And he’s humble too, apparently.

“I know that you couldn’t fake your reaction to me in the club. Your breathing became quicker, I felt your pulse jump under my lips when they were on your neck. I saw how blown your pupils got." He shifted closer to me then, bringing his other hand up to push my hair behind my shoulder like he did earlier in the night. "Just like they are now."

He leaned closer to me, his voice was lower, and it made my stomach flutter. "You're clenching your thighs together, Y/n. Your shirt may be baggy, but I can see how hard your nipples are too." His tongue ran out to wet his lips. "If I'm wrong, just tell me now. If I've misread this, I will leave right now, and we can pretend this never happened." Spencer brought both his hands up to cradle my face; despite how wet my panties were, how tight my nipples are, how badly I wanted him to touch me, this gesture made me feel special. He was holding me like he actually cared about me like I was precious. "But, if I'm not wrong, and you want this too, Y/n, tell me. Tell me you want this too and I won't stop touching you until you scream my name."

I let out a soft whimper then. Like it’s a choice. “I want this,” I leaned into his touch. “Please, Spencer.”

His thumb brushed over my cheek, his eyes never leaving mine. “Please, what, baby?”

“Kiss me.”

No sooner had the words left my mouth than his lips were on mine. His lips were softer than I imagined, they were firm and almost…questioning. When I nipped at his bottom lip, something seemed to break free inside of him. His lips slanted over mine with a hunger I had never felt. His tongue ran over my bottom lip before I opened for him. Spencer’s tongue moved into my mouth while his hands moved; one hand moved back to grip my hair at the base of my skull, tugging firmly, the other moved down to my neck, not applying any pressure, just resting it there in a gesture that felt possessive.

The need for oxygen broke us apart, his lips moving across my cheek to my jaw, then down to my neck. “How could you think I didn’t like you?” he mumbled into my skin. “You have no idea what you do to me. None.”

I threw my head back when he sucked on my pulse point, a moan ripping from my throat. “W-what…what do I do?”

Pulling back from me, he gripped the bottom of my shirt, looking at me for consent before he pulled it over my head. His eyes were firmly on my chest, his lips parted, his breathing heavy. He pushed me down slowly on the bed; I was on my back and he was hovering over me. I felt his mouth place hot, wet, kisses from my collarbone down towards my breasts. His right hand landed on my breast, his thumb brushing back and forth over my nipple while his lips moved closer and closer to my left. I tangled my hands in his hair, urging him forward.

“You want to know what you do to me?” he raised his head slightly, making sure my eyes were on him when he flicked his tongue over my nipple, causing me to gasp. “What do you do to me in your little skirts, with your little smiles, and your little laughs?” He gave my nipple a sharp pinch. “You’re all I fucking think about, y/n.” With a growl, he finally took my nipple in his mouth, teasing it with his teeth and tongue. He switched to the other breast while he adjusted himself over me, bringing his pelvis down to rest at the seam of my body between my thighs. I shifted restlessly under him, trying to grind my pussy against him. He was so fucking hard.

With a groan, he lifted his head and started kissing his way towards the middle of my chest, moving down to the curve of my stomach. “Do you know how many times I came back to my hotel room after spending all day with you and was so hard I had to cum before I could think of anything else?” he peppered kisses down my body as he spoke.

My eyes shot open at this confession that he seemed to think was no big deal. “What?” I couldn’t believe this. “You…you touched yourself and thought of…”

He hooked his fingers into the waistband of my shorts and panties, taking my raised hips as an invitation to remove both from my body. "You. I thought of you." He threw my clothes on the floor, pulling my legs open. His eyes moved over all of me, his Adam's apple bobbing when he swallowed hard. “I thought about kissing you. About making you squirm for me.” He ran his fingers up and down my thighs, his mouth running slowly over my inner thighs. Spencer’s hands hooked around my upper thighs, moving me to where he wanted me. “But, most of all, I thought about this pretty pussy.” He placed a kiss on my clit, chuckling at the wanton moan that came from me and how my fingers tangled in his soft brown curls. “I thought about all the different ways I could make this pretty pussy cum all over me.” With that, he ran his tongue up my slit before flicking it over my clit.

Dr. Spencer Reid was good at everything, so of course, he was good at this too. His mouth moved over me, watching my reaction to see what I liked best. His tongue moved in circles around my clit before slipping down to my opening. His tongue plunged inside me, fucking me, while his thumb came over to rub my clit.

“Spence- fuck- Spencer, please.” My hips tried to shift restlessly, but his arms were iron bars holding me still. He slowly moved his left forearm to rest across my hips, bringing his right hand down to my throbbing pussy. He pulled his mouth away from me, much to my dismay. He pushed one finger, then another into me. My head thrashed wildly, and my thighs started to shake. “Spencer!”

He just smirked and curled his fingers, hitting the spot inside me that made everything in my body pulse. “What, baby?”

My breaths were coming in gasps, my voice was a needy whimper. “Make me cum, Spencer. Please, please make me cum.”

He needed no other encouragement. His fingers continued their steady thrust in and out of me while his mouth covered my clit again. He alternated between flicking my clit with his tongue, then circling it before pulling it into his mouth, sucking lightly.

“Spencer.” I felt my orgasm rising. “Spencer don’t- don’t stop. I’m gonna cum, please make me cum.”

He kept his pace steady, sucking on my clit, moaning at my words. His eyes had been closed, but at that moment they opened and met mine. Then I felt his teeth ghost over my clit, I saw the want in his eyes. That was my undoing. My back arched, my mouth hung open in a silent scream. I heard myself say his name over and over again. Spencer pushed his fingers inside me, massaging me through the most powerful orgasm I had ever had. With one final kiss on my oversensitive clit, he withdrew his fingers, putting them into his mouth to suck my orgasm off of them.

He kissed back up my body, and I tried to respond, but I was still so shattered. I had never felt anything so powerful before. He cupped my face in one hand and kissed me slowly. I returned the kiss, moving my hands to the buttons of his shirt.

Spencer broke the kiss, pulling back to look at me again. “Hang on, baby.” His hand came up to still my own. “We can take a second. It’s okay. Just breathe.”

This beautiful man smiled at me then. I felt my heart flutter when he leaned down to pepper soft kisses along my jaw, his thumb coming up to wipe a tear that fell from the corner of my eye that I hadn’t even noticed.

I don’t know how long we stayed like that. He shifted to lay beside me, whispering reassurances to me while I came back down. This was just one of the ways that Spencer was so different from every other man. I didn't feel rushed, or pressured. I could feel how hard he still was, I could feel the tension in his body, but he simply kissed me while he cupped my jaw.

He made me feel…cherished.

I moved my hands to tangle in his hair again, deepening our kiss. He didn’t move my hands away when I started to work on the buttons of his shirt. The fire that I thought had been calmed by my orgasm had come roaring back. Spencer moved his hands to his belt while I finished with his shirt. His shirt came off, tossed in the same direction as my clothes. I pulled his pants and boxers down his legs, watching his cock spring free.

Everything about him was painfully beautiful. His angular cheekbones, the jaw that looked like it was carved from granite, even the toned muscles of his body. He had a small trail of hair that went down from his belly button to his groin. His cock laid against his stomach, the head glistening with precum.

“You’re beautiful,” I whispered, kneeling beside him, running my eyes over his body.

His soft hand came to grab mine, pulling it to his lips. He kissed the back of my hand, smiling softly at me.

I moved to straddle him, lower on his thighs. I took him in my hand, moving up and down, twisting my wrist as I neared the tip, swiping my thumb over his head.

“Baby,” he groaned. “Y/n, as much as I want you to do…whatever the fuck you want with me, I’m so close. I feel like I’m going to explode.” I bit into my bottom lip, unable to totally stop the smile spreading over my face. “Please, I need to feel your pussy wrapped around my cock.” He moved his hands to my hips, urging my body forward.

I raised up on my knees, taking him in my hand again, lining him up with my entrance. The tendons in his neck were strained, his fingers gripped my hips so hard I knew I was going to have bruises tomorrow. As I slowly started to sink down on his cock, Spencer let out the sexiest groan I had ever heard. His eyes were fixed where our bodies were joined, watching his dick slid deeper inside of me.

“Come on, baby,” he whispered. “You’re doing so good. Just a little bit more.”

He was so long, he wasn't overly thick, but just thick enough to cause a pleasurable stretching when he breached me that was almost painful. I gasped out a sound that might have been his name when he bottomed out inside me. I slowly circled my hips, adjusting to him. Spencer’s nails dug into my hips as he forced himself to stay still.

“Please move, y/n. Please. You’re so fucking tight.” He groaned as my walls fluttered around him. “Do you like it when I talk to you? Does that make your pretty pussy wetter?” He smirked at my whimper as I tightened around him.

I began at a slower pace, trying to tease him. Spencer quickly lost patience with that; he thrust his hips upwards, meeting my movements, his hands pushing me down onto him. I leaned forward, bracing on hand on his shoulder, the other on the bed. He pounded into me while I tried to match his pace. Spencer’s hand moved from my hip up to wrap around my throat. I nodded, forcing my eyes to stay open as he moved inside me.

His fingers squeezed slightly, pulling my face closer to his. Our lips met in a sloppy kiss. My thighs burned from matching his movements. “You feel so fucking good, y/n.” His grip on my neck tightened ever so slightly, which only heightened my arousal. “I want to feel you cum on my cock. Can you do that for me, pretty girl?”

He flipped us over quickly, never pulling completely out of me. Spencer moved to push my legs further apart, the change in angle allowing him to fill me deeper than I thought possible. His hair was sticking to his brow, his cheeks were flushed, his breathing erratic. He was the most fucking beautiful thing I had ever seen.

One hand held my leg, the other went down to my pussy, his thumb moving over my clit at a rapid pace. “Tell me what you need, Pretty Girl. Tell me how to make this pretty pussy cum all over me.”

I whined at his words. “Spencer, I-“ my voice broke off. I was so fucking close. "I need you." He seemed to understand my broken plea. He brought his body down, his chest flush against mine. He rocked into me at such a fast and hard pace. His hand still in between us rubbing circles around my clit.  

I felt his lips ghost over my ear. “I want to fucking hear you, y/n.” His speed increased, his thrust getting choppier. He was close. “I want this whole fucking town to hear what you sound like when I make you cum. When you cream all over my dick, I want you to scream my name.” With that, he moved his mouth down my neck. He bit the same tender area he had kissed in the club, where my neck met my shoulder.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck yes, Spencer!" I felt myself begin to splinter apart. “Please make me cum, fuck please.” My babbling finally broke as my orgasm tore through me. I couldn’t hear his deep groan when I came, my scream was too loud. I felt the vibration against my neck. It was only as I started to float down that I realized my nails were dug into his back. With a few last thrust and my name on his lips, I felt Spencer pulse, cumming inside me.

We lay there for a few minutes, just breathing before he rolled off of me. I felt overwhelmed, so I was relieved when he tugged me over to him. He wrapped his arm around me when I laid my head on his chest. I felt his lips on my forehead. “It’s very important for women to urinate after sexual intercourse to avoid UTIs, but you have another minute or so before that becomes more urgent.”

I couldn’t control my laugh at his comment. "Thanks, Doc." I kissed his chest. "Only you could make me cum so hard I almost blackout, then go back to being…you." I slowly untangled myself from him, going to the bathroom to handle business. When I returned, I found Spencer where I left him, his eyes were fixed on the ceiling, one hand resting behind his head, the other over his heart. He looked so lost in that moment.

“Spencer?” I asked, crawling on to the bed. “What’s wrong?”

He didn’t pretend that something wasn’t bothering him. “When you said that I just go back to being me…Do you not like that?”

My heart broke a tiny bit at the question. “Spencer, no! I love that! I love your little facts and statistics!” How did he not know that? “The best part of my day is listening to you talk. Just being with you is wonderful.” I cupped his face, bringing his gaze to mine. “Sure, I like what we just did; but I liked you before that. I want both.” Fuck. “Assuming you want me,” I rambled quickly. “This doesn’t have to mean anything, I know that it doesn’t always-“

He cut me off by pressing his lips to mine in the sweetest kiss I had ever felt. It was filled with hope and promise and…Spencer.

“It means everything to me, Y/n.”

-

I didn’t see the rest of the team until the next morning when we all boarded the jet; I was so ready to go home. I personally didn’t think anything appeared that different. Spencer sat beside me on the couch, but that wasn’t weird…right? We were just co-workers, sitting beside each other super casually. Had we spent most of last night and a little bit of this morning screwing each other’s brains out? Certainly. But you couldn’t see that…right?

Morgan’s chuckle is what confirmed I was so wrong. “Hey, y/l/n,” he called, smiling so hard it looked like his face would split from his amusement. “You missed a spot.” He pointed towards his own neck.

There was a beat of silence before Hotch snorted. SSA Aaron Hotchner, the man who never found anything funny was laughing at me.

I felt myself turn tomato red, angling my body towards Spencer’s, burying my head against his shoulder, away from the rest of the team.

“I bet you’re glad pretty boy was your partner now, huh?”

I may have wanted to melt into the floor in embarrassment, but it was sort of worth it to see the blush on Spencer’s cheeks.

--

[alreadyblondenow]

Jeno saves the world | Lee Jeno (TEASER)

Lee Jeno x Female!Reader

▸ Smut, Fluff, Angst, Hero au ▸ Part of no capes. collaboration hosted by @kabira​ ▸ High school sweet hearts, strangers to lovers?, lovers to enemies, enemies to lovers. HAHAHA  Summary: The Lee Jeno has always been head over heels for you ever since you missed the bus and he had to fly you home. With maximum effort and incredible patience, Jeno finally won your heart and did not care even though you don’t have superpowers yet. But because of social pressure and your constant want to be worthy for Jeno, you made a deal with a super villain but ended up being the villain of the story and Jeno is the only superhero that can stop you.   Warnings: Smut, self doubt, swearing, protected sex, unplanned rough sex because Jeno has super strength, fingering, making out, mentions of bruises, using sex to forget problems, oral sex, discrimination between strong and weak powers, mentions of other idols (more warnings when the fic is posted)  A/N: Pure fiction. Inspired by my all time favorite super hero movie, Sky High. I swear that movie is a masterpiece. If you love my Lee Jeno fic, Vampire Play, you’re gonna love this too. I hope my readers don’t mind that I’m trying and writing something new. Yay for new things!

Release date: March 2021

‘Effort comes a long way’

And tonight, you do a different kind of effort for yourself and your boyfriend. Although you’ve been nervous since this morning and have been thinking of different scenarios upon meeting Jeno’s superhero parents. You hope with all your heart that they’re okay with letting their son date a late bloomer. It may be humiliating to admit that you don’t have your superpowers yet, but you’re not planning to lie or fool Jeno’s parents just because you have your own imperfections.

“Still nervous? Stop fidgeting you look lovely” Jeno stopped your hands from fixing your dress and hold them tightly, giving your knuckles a few kisses before he opens the front door and introduce you to his parents.

“Jeno-“ you stopped him from opening the door and brought out your birthday gift to him. You see your boyfriend’s eyes sparkle when he saw that red bow wrapped around that oblong-shaped gift and wonder what’s inside. “To the second guy that accepted me for who I am- well, my dad is the first one obviously. Happy birthday,” you giggle hand the gift to him with shaky hands. He smiled sincerely at you, grabbed the gift, and gave you a very tight hug.

“I was so busy getting nervous today that I forgot to greet you. I’m sorry,”

“No no, it’s okay. I forgot that it’s my birthday too because I’m excited to introduce you to my parents” he kissed you on the lips one last time, told you that you’re beautiful and that his parents will definitely love you and finally opened the door. It’s not your first time in his house, but it is your first time being in his house while his parents are home.

Hand in hand you walked towards the dining area with a nervous heart. His mother greeted you first and gave you a hug, followed by his dad who did the same and invited you to take a sit. It’s Jeno’s birthday but you feel like you’re the start of the night rather than your boyfriend.

The dinner started wonderfully, giggles here and there, stories kept on coming, not to mention the food was incredibly delicious. For a second there, all the happy scenarios that ran through your mind earlier today were happening and you felt stupid for even thinking that something wrong will happen.

Everything was fine.

But not until his father brought up school and asked about your power placement.

“Dad, let’s not talk about school on my birthday, please. You know I hate school,” Jeno tried his best to avoid the ‘powers’ topic because he knew it will make you uncomfortable. But his dad was very eager to know more about you.

And that’s the part where everything went downhill.

You cleared your throat before answering the question will all honesty and bravery. And of course, your boyfriend was quick to hold your hand under the table just so you know that he’s right beside you. “Uhm, I don’t have any powers. Yet,” and right then and there you see their genuine smiles fade and were replaced by fake ones.

Your heart broke. But you can’t blame them, of course, they want Jeno to be in a relationship with someone amazing, someone who can match his greatness.

“How're your parents dear? Are they okay with it? Are they superheroes too?”

“Mom-“

“They are very much patient with me, Mrs. Lee. Thank you for asking. Actually, Jeno is patient with me too. I'm starting to think that being patient has become one is his superpowers now” you tried so much to avoid talking about your parents but Mrs. Lee repeated the question again.

“Are your parents superheroes too?” you can see it in her eyes. You can see that she’s starting to hate you and she will hate you even more if you say that your parents are human, but good thing they’re not.

“They are both superheroes” you answer quietly, like your confidence is slowly fading and you feel very small even though Jeno is holding your hand.

“I have a friend that has a son, he’s a late bloomer like you too” she explains with fake giggles, it’s annoying but you have to stay nice. “She and her husband decided to throw their son into a vat of toxic waste and now he has powers”

“Mom!” Jeno shouted but you stopped him.

“I’m sorry Mrs. Lee but, how can your friend do that to her own son?”

“Y/n, darling I don’t know. That’s something I will never understand because as you can see my son here has powers. Multiple powers”

“Alright, that’s enough” Jeno exclaimed and got up from his seat and told them you guys are leaving. You didn’t want any problem between you and his parents so you thanked them still for a wonderful night and delicious dinner even though they’re not looking into your eyes directly anymore.

If only you could be someone worthy for Jeno this shitty dinner wouldn’t have happened in the first place.  

[harryskalechips]

Illicit affairs Part three

A/N Hello guys! I’m sorry this part took so long. i’ve been so busy. Thank you for all the support and love. Each and every dm makes my day. I hope you like the ending idk hahaha dm me and send your thoughts! bye, I hope you enjoy

Their illicit affair isn’t really a secret anymore after being caught kissing on camera. Oh Harry, haven’t you learned not to be a romantic in public? Time to watch everything crumble down.

Tw: Cheating, smut

Thank you @harrysleftchelseaboot for letting me participate in your writing challenge! Here is part three! Any new writers or readers please check out the masterlist! 

here are my prompts:

“Promise you’ll stay by my side?”

“Don’t you see I’m trying?”

“It’s okay. I understand. You can leave, they all do.”

 Note: I do not condone cheating whatsoever! Please mind that this story is fictional! As much as it makes me sad to paint Harry as a cheater, it’s part of this storyline I thought of as I listened to Taylor’s album, Folklore.

Word count: 7.5k / Masterlist // Part 1 // Part 2 

When a married person participates in an affair, they already know the consequences that can come out of it. Not only is it a betrayal to their spouse but every vow they said at the altar is washed away and is drowned in a pool of greed and resentment.  Suddenly, their beautiful and favourite memory of their wedding day becomes a cursed thought... at least for Harry Styles. 

 A nightmare. A horrible nightmare that Harry never thought would come true. He sits up immediately half-naked in his sheets after his call with Y/N. He focuses on his phone, swiping through the articles written about their newly found scandal. Truthfully, he wanted to read them all but as he counted and tried to keep track of each one, he realized there were millions out there. 

His wife’s screams and torturing whimpers were hurting his brain, after all, she was just a couple of rooms down the hallway. Of course, he wanted to check on her or pack a bag and leave the house but that wasn’t his main priority. It was Y/N.  He could physically feel his heartache as he saw each headline along with pictures of him and her kissing in the parking lot at LAX. It was his fault. He knew it. He was too excited and happy to have Y/N back in his arms, he never thought a person working there or an undercover paparazzi would manage their way into the private area. 

Was he angry? Most definitely. But there was another feeling he had in his chest that was too stubborn to leave. He hasn’t felt like this in a while. The pressure building around his body like selfish vines, continuing to wrap around him until he choked. Until all the love Y/N gave him these past months were forced to be forgotten. He could feel it from his head to his toes. The unforgettable butterflies when he thinks of Y/N are bleached and gone as his anxiety took over. 

He wanted to cry and scream. His career is gone. His reputation is ruined. His fans are disappointed. His family, his friends -his wife! But most importantly, the woman who makes him the happiest man on earth is exposed to his world. The life he’s been sucked into for the last 9 years has finally sucked her in too. And that’s why he wanted to protect her from it in the first place. 

When he first decided he wanted to share his talents and be famous, he never realized there was a very big price he had to pay. His privacy - his innocent and naive mind being manipulated as he networked as a new celebrity while labels were put on him that he couldn’t fight back. He loves who he is right now but that was because of her and for some time now,  he wished the public could just fuck of. Sometimes he wished he was a regular guy living his own life so he wouldn’t have to deal with this bullshit. 

Thinking about his wishes and his life, he almost wanted to laugh at this present moment. Was this a dream or was he right about love? Once he finally commits to a woman he loves, the universe has an odd way of returning his new deck of cards. Stupid, because that’s not how you play and it’s been unfair for him his whole life.

He had to check on Y/N.

He tosses his phone onto the bed and gets ready as he purposely ignores the device and walks out of his room. His game plan was to sneak out of the house and come back later tonight to talk to his wife. It was obvious she knew about his affair and all Harry wanted to do was avoid her. 

“Sneaking out?” fuck. Harry keeps his hand on the railway as he looks behind him to see his wife standing near the wall with her arms crossed. Her eyes were swollen and her cheeks were so puffy. He wasn’t heartless. He felt bad for her.

“I was just going to get some breakfast.” Harry lies as he stares directly into her eyes. She wasn’t the same girl he married and she is no Y/N.

“You mind if you get me some too?” She nonchalantly replies, making him confused about her odd behaviour.

“Yeah, um what do you want?”

“I want to know why you fucking cheated on me.” Her calm strict tone changes into a more aggressive one as she couldn’t keep up her facade. He knew it would happen. 

“Look-”

“You cheated on me and embarrassed our marriage... and um you have the fucking face to tell me you’re going out for breakfast!”

“I wanted to give you some space before we talked about it.”

“You’re a coward! You cheated at least own up to it.”

“Alright okay! I cheated on you!” Harry steps off the staircase and approaches her. They stood 7 feet apart as both of them had rigid and uncomfortable stances.

“How long?” Harry looks up at the ceiling and releases a loud breath.

“Approximately a year.”

“I can’t believe you.” She cries silently as she looks at him in disappointment. She quickly wipes her tears away, knowing that her dignity is already in the ruins because of him. “I know I haven’t been a good wife to you but you haven’t been a good husband. I just never realized you gave up on our marriage already.”

“Are you joking? A couple of months after our wedding you’ve been the one acting cold! I loved you so much but I realized what we had isn’t who we are anymore.” Harry confesses in an agitated tone. 

“Harry after our wedding -You became busy not me! I tried telling you and giving you signs but you ignored me. I explicitly told you and you said you were in a good position in your career where you had so much potential… so I gave you space!”

“I tried reaching out to you so we can spend time together.” Harry furrows his eyebrows at her. “Don’t make me seem like the bad guy here. I was waiting for you to tell me you wanted to work our relationship out again. I gave you space!”

“I shouldn’t be the one to do that, Harry!” She pauses. “As time went by, I realized I didn’t need you as much anymore but I wanted to see what would happen if we stayed together. I still loved you!”

“You stop prioritizing us.”

“You did it first.” She scoffs as she takes her silk robe off her, leaving her in a short nightgown. She was so angry, she needed to find a way to cool off.  “You think I’m stupid? I knew you were seeing someone the moment you started taking that ring off. I just thought you had the common courtesy not to humiliate us and our careers -to not give up on what we signed up for. Our marriage.”

“So you’re saying you were  throwing a fit in your bedroom because I got caught?” Harry steps back a bit. He never realized how fucked up this relationship was.

“Obviously! What do you think I want in the papers? Not your affair with that college whore!”

“Watch your mouth.” Harry deepens his voice as he stares at her intently. “This scandal was not my intention. I’m not stupid like that.”

“Well, you’re stupid enough to get caught!” She rebuttals. She turns around walking to his room as she angrily tugs on the ends of her hair. “I don’t care what you do with your life but you should’ve thought about me and what would happen if anyone found out about our broken marriage.” She opens his walk-in closet and enters, leaving Harry to trail behind her. Without any hesitation, her hands begin to carelessly toss his clothes on the floor, knowing his favourite boots were to be specifically thrown at the wall. She was fuming.

“We had an image to carry and you ruined it because you couldn’t keep your hands to yourself in public!”

…

“Y/N, I’m so glad you made it in today. I hope the paparazzi in front of the building didn’t hassle you too much.” Rob enters the meeting room and greets her in a sarcastic tone. “Unfortunately, they’ve been quite a nuisance for the rest of your co-workers.” He places a blank manila folder on the table and sits himself down as he looks at her in a serious manner. Y/N felt like she was being tortured, having just them in the room. “Paul will be coming in shortly, he has to deal with publicity first.” He was the one who called her. She barely saw him these past years as she worked more for Rob here at Columbia Records but she knew he was just as powerful after all, he was the company’s president. 

“They’ve been following me around ever since I left my apartment. Look, Rob, I’m sorry about-”

“Hold that statement. You shouldn’t be sorry.” His finger raises in the air. Y/N watches him carefully as he opens the folder in front of them. 

There… it had pictures of her infamous kiss with Harry, recent articles about the two of them and… her employment contracts. 

“You shouldn’t be sorry,” Rob repeats himself as he picks out the photo of them kissing and slides it to her on the table. “I’m sorry.”

“What?” Y/N couldn’t believe this. She knew what was to come but she didn’t want to think it was true! This was her dream job and it was all going to be ripped away from her as if the last 3 years meant nothing to them.

“I have to let you go.”

“Rob, there’s nothing in my contract that says I can’t have a relationship with a co-worker.” Y/N remembers reading that bullet point when she first started her internship at Columbia records. Although it may have been years, that rule couldn’t possibly change.

“I think you’re forgetting Harry isn’t your co-worker but our client.” Another voice answers. Paul opens the door as he hears what she says. He takes the pen from the pocket on the left side of his chest and instantly picks up her contract and circles that point in red. She definitely forgot about that. She finally remembers how months ago she was reading her contract as she sipped her… 3rd glass of wine. 

“Oh.”

“Not just that but any employee that has publicly put our company on blast in front of the media requires immediate dismissal,” Rob adds in.

“Also It’s nice to see you again Ms. L/N.” Paul, a short middle-aged man sits beside Paul. “I had to deal with your mess outside. It’s getting out of control.” He adjusts his tie. “You do understand what actions we must take now?” He asks sternly, barely looking at her as he briefly reads her contract. 

“No, wait! It was a picture that I didn’t know about! Paul...Rob, please don’t do this. I’m so grateful to be working here.” She pleads.

“I’m sorry Y/N. I wish you told me about this sooner so we could have figured something out.” Rob shakes his head in disappointment.  “He’s married you know that. The damage control is more than what you guys could have possibly thought of.”

“I never meant for any of this to happen. Rob, I’m sorry. I truly am.” Y/N begins to cry again as if she wasn’t crying on her drive here. 

“Let me be honest, I  don’t want to let you go but I need to be fair. Our vision statement is to take care of our stars. With the disgrace of your affair being exposed, you can’t continue to work here while Harry is our client. He has a fixed contract so I can’t do anything to help you out.”

“I get it” She pauses a bit as she tries to take everything in.  “I think I should leave.” Y/N abruptly stands up and wipes her tears. She walks forward to give Paul a handshake. She then turns to a standing Rob but he ignores her hand and gives her a hug instead. 

“You have so much potential. I’m sorry your journey with us ends here.”

_

“Never knew you were a lying whore.” Jasmine murmurs under her breath as she walks past Y/N in the office. 

It sucked. It truly did. Y/N could feel all eyes on her as she walked to her office to clean things up. It’s crazy how she used to feel so intimidated walking in these hallways, then after receiving a platinum job offer, she became confident. Now, she’s just embarrassed and ashamed as she packed her things up. 

She tried her best to hold in her tears as she picked each picture frame off her bookshelf. “Everyone hates you, you know.” She looks to the left to see her close friend here from work, at her door.

“I know.” She bites her lip as she can feel tears forming in her eyes once again. Why can’t she stop crying? “You can insult me all you want. I’ve been receiving death threats all day from people I don’t know.” She looks down again and places random books in her bin. 

“Is he the guy you were talking about a week ago or was this something that started in London.”

“We were together for a year until we broke things off a couple of months ago.” Y/N confesses as she wraps her arms around herself. Marissa carefully walks inside the room and approaches her. Without another word, she hugs Y/N very tightly.

“I’m going to miss you around here.” That’s all she said. It gave Y/N a mixed message because she didn’t know if their friendship ended here along with her potential career. A short message like that made her more upset.

To be frank, Marissa didn’t know what to feel. She understood Y/N and Harry. But the affair? If her husband did that to her, she could never forgive them. Maybe that’s how a lot of people see it. Not only was this a betrayal of a spouse but a betrayal of integrity to everyone they know.

And because of this, Marissa made the choice to keep her distance from this sweet girl. How betrayed and played she felt as her co-worker was sleeping with their married client behind the world’s back. 

~

Y/N was a big mess. Her apartment used to be neat and organized as that’s how she is as a person but after coming home from work, scattered objects from her boxes laid lonely on her chestnut floors. 

She sat on along with them, drinking from the bottle of red wine as she read through articles and mean tweets about her. The only hope she had was for Harry to come and comfort her.

The sad thing is… he hasn’t answered any of her texts or calls since she broke the news to him this morning. Funny enough, the display on her screen changed to a call and as she hoped it was Harry...it was her mother calling. 

“Hello?” Y/N answer as she feels her cheeks become wet again. She was so embarrassed to talk to her mom. What does her mother think of her now?

“How have you been, baby?” Thankfully, she wasn’t angry but worried about her well being.

“Everyone hates me, mom. How am I supposed to find a job now.”

“You can come back home and I’ll take care of you.”

“I don’t want to leave LA.” Y/N feels her heart die a bit. LA was her dream. She wanted to make so many memories here. The only thing she gained was a reputation for being a man’s whore. She isn’t ready to leave and move back under her mom’s roof. After all her roof means her conservative rules. 

“I think you need to.” Her mother pauses. “Have you spoken to that celebrity yet?”

“Yes.” Y/N lies. She didn’t want to feel worst, knowing Harry was purposely avoiding her. 

“What did he say?”

“We’re going to talk about it soon.”

“Do you love him?” Her mother shoots out another question after the last one. She genuinely wanted to know how her daughter was but she couldn’t deny the disappointing feeling buried in her chest. 

“Yes.”

“How long were you guys together?”

“A year?”

“Does he have children?”

“No.”

“Why do you think your value is cheap to be sleeping with a married man?”

“Mom!” Y/N eyes widen at the candid question. 

“I’m not trying to hate on you Y/N. I just want to know why you let yourself be in this position.” Her mother lets out a sigh. “Do you think anyone will want to hire you after this scandal? Why couldn’t you wait until he got a divorce?”

“I love him.”

“He manipulated you!”

“No, he didn’t.” She pulls the phone away from her face due to being so irritated. “I thought you called me because you wanted to check up on me -Not to hate on my decisions!” She immediately hangs up the call and lays down on her floor.

Today has got be the worst day of her life.

~

It was the next morning after their affair was exposed and no one was feeling good. The rhythmic pattern of knocks on Y/N’s door wakes her up. She somehow managed to fall asleep on the floor last night leaving her to sit up and glance through her curtains to see the paparazzi loitering around downstairs. Letting out a sigh, she stands up and opens the door. Thankfully, she knew it was Harry from the way he knocked -which made her feel a whole lot better.

She opens the door and catches sight of him in front of her. Hope fills her eyes immediately as she quickly yanks him inside. Without another waste of breath, they hug each other so tightly. “Where were you? You weren’t answering my calls all day.” She mumbles into his shoulder. His arms wrapped around her, making her remember the little bubble they used to have before.

At least she knew they were safe here inside her apartment. 

“I’m sorry. I had to speak to Jeff and handle my wife all day.” He pulls away and holds her face in his hands. “Y/N baby, I’m sorry for everything.”

“It’s okay.” She shakes her head and grabs his hand so she can lead them to her couch. “ Come sit down. How did you find your way into the building without getting caught?”

“I think you forgot I’m a pro at coming over here without getting seen.” He gives a small smile as he looks around her messy living room. “Did you sleep in here last tonight?” The throw blanket and tiny blue pillow on the floor catches his eye. 

“Sorry about the mess.” She pulls her hand away from his. She fixes her hair as she manages to move the boxes out of the way. “I did yeah. Fell asleep.” Y/N bit her lip in anxiety. She was scared to tell him she lost her job because of their relationship. 

“These boxes...” He continues to sit on the couch. He picks up a frame from one of them only to realize it was from her office. “Were you fired, Y/N?” His tone of voice automatically changing into a serious one. 

“Well, I went to the meeting Paul called me in for yesterday. Luckily, I saw Ro-”

“Answer my question.” He deadly stares at her while the frame in his hand is gripped tightly in his fist. 

“Yes.” Harry immediately stands up and reaches behind his pocket to grab his phone. “Wait, what are you doing?”

“I’m calling them, obviously.” He scratches his nose and glances at the window. As he held his phone to his ear on one side, he quickly walked around her apartment closing all her curtains. He keeps his standing stance once he finds himself back in the living room, leaving Y/N to sit on the couch and watch him. 

“Harry, hang up.” She suggests as she watches his every move. “Please, stop.”

“Y/N, they fired you.” He tosses his phone to the floor after being ignored by the company. “They can’t do that!”

“Yes, they can. We um...I uh... I broke rules from my contract.”

“Fuck, Y/N.” She could see how broken he was from hearing that. He stressfully runs his hand through his hair as he looks at her. “I’m sorry for kissing you in the parking lot.”

“It’s not your fault.” She bites her cheek as she looks down at her hands. In all honestly, she did feel some sort of anger towards him -maybe because she just lost her job.

“Are you mad at me?” Harry sits down beside her and guides her to straddle him. She immediately complies and wraps her arms around his neck. She rests her cheek against his chest as she feels a tear run down her face. Hopefully, he doesn’t feel it.

“It’s just...Why are you married?” She fixes her position while she feels his fingers slide underneath her sweatshirt. She lets out a sigh and rubs her face against his thick shirt. “I mean why out of all the days we knew each other, we started out like this? Why did I have to meet you and fall in love?” She lets out her frustrated confession.

“I don’t regret anything.” Harry takes a hard swallow and kisses her temple. She immediately sits up and looks at him with a surprised look on her face. 

“I lost my job and possibly my whole career!”

“Baby hey look,” He tightens his hold on her waist. “You’re not the only one. My career is obviously not doing well too. My fans are disappointed at me and I have this huge scandal on my back.”

“The only difference is you have money.” She crosses her arms. Harry gives her a strange look and sits up a bit. 

“I don’t think we’re understanding each other.” He rests his hands by his side. “I  don’t regret meeting you and falling in love. I don’t regret coming here every night to fall asleep beside you. You make me happy and if there is one thing I realized after our break up, it’s that I love you so much. You never stopped driving me crazy.”

“I’m sorry.” She shakes her head and pouts. “I’m just scared.” She breaks down in front of him. “You mean so much to me. I don’t want to lose you again. Now that I know we’re both fighting for each other, I don’t want to give up.”

“I don’t want to either.” He hugs her tightly. “You’re mine and I’m yours. We’re going to get through this despite what happened.”

~

“Harry.” Rob greets him since he’s already sitting at the table with the rest of their team. As Harry walked in with his coffee, he noticed the empty seat in front of his. That definitely made him angrier more than he thought. 

Instead of greeting everyone with a smile or a handshake, he says nothing and sits down. Today was a serious meeting, so he decided to wear a casual suit. He fixes his blazer and rubs his chin. “Let’s get started,” he speaks up in a monotone voice.

Jasmine speaks up after making eye contact with Rob. “Your name has been trending for the past few days so as Y/N’s.”

“I think I would know that.” He gives her cut eye and rolls his eyes at the end. He remembered last night, Y/N told him what she said to her. If only, he could get her fired. 

“Harry, Tour starts in a month. Should we continue with it?” Rob asks.

“Yes.” He folds his hands on the table, trying to not look at the empty chair. 

“But your reputation-”

“I want to release a public statement.” 

“I think that’s a good idea but what could you possibly say that can help your fans understand your cheat-” Jasmine gets cut off again by Harry.

“Jasmine stop.” He takes a sip of his coffee. Everyone’s eyes widen at his tone.

“Harry, do you know what you want to say?” Darlene, his publicist asks. Jeff stayed silent as he listened to the conversation. Harry quickly glances at him before continuing on.

“I’ll write everything myself and upload them on my social platforms when I’m ready.”

After the meeting ended, Harry stayed in his seat as he watched everyone leave. It was different knowing he would never see Y/N be one of them ever again. Marissa stalls a bit, cleaning up her papers as she looked up and spoke to him. “Shouldn’t you go to Rob’s office so you can join his meeting with Jeff?” Harry nods his head but doesn’t move.

“How is she?” She genuinely asks him. He looks at her and plays with the pen in his hand.

“She’s been locked up inside her apartment for the past two days.” He was too, to be honest. He only left her building to change at his house and come to this meeting. Lately, they’ve been spending as much time together. 

“Can you please tell her I love her?” Marissa leans her hip on the table and quickly wipes away a tear. “I understand her. I just feel a bit betrayed at the moment.”

“Okay.” He sits immediately and pulls out his phone. “I’m going to head to Rob’s now but I hope you girls stay friends. She doesn’t um exactly have anybody except for me.” She nods her head and walks around the table to give him a hug.

“Take care of her, Harry.”

-

Harry’s hands were shaking as he was about to post his message about his cheating scandal for millions to see. He did feel a bit reassured by Rob and Jeff, however. They promised him, they would try their best to fix his reputation and keep him and Y/N out of the media after this blows over. Since he still had two more years with Columbia, Rob also told him he would switch Jasmine out of his team. Maybe things will go well after a while? 

Posted 7:18 PM

A/N Bruh if this picture is blurry fuck I'm going to stuff my fist down my throat.  I’ll just repost the message here hahah booooo! where are my tomatoes? 

harrystyles To my fans, to the people who know me and most importantly to my wife I’m sorry. Nothing can excuse the reason why I cheated. Secretly behind the cameras, my marriage was already on a rocky path that she and I made the choice not to fix. We began to drift away from one another after a couple months in our marriage. With strong denial, both of us chose to let it be and continue the negative impact that was affecting us both. In 2017, I met an intern at my label who I never thought would change my life. I’m sorry that you all had to find out this way. Never in my life would I have thought I would be the man who cheats on his wife but please understand my marriage was broken from the very beginning. I’m not trying to hand out excuses to you all but instead, share an insight into what my life is.  It’s hard to have eyes watching me every day without them knowing anything about me. No one will understand how I felt and what dilemmas and issues I’ve been through but that’s okay. I spoke to my wife and we have decided to officially separate as we realized it was time. Cheating is never okay and I understand if you are angry at me or choose to unfollow me. I will forever be grateful for your support as I continue my journey in life. Y/N, I love you. Thank you for being my rock this past year. I’m sorry for all the hurt you’ve been going through. I know you don’t deserve this because you’re the most genuine and sweetest girl I adore. You’re my soulmate and I wouldn't be as happy as I was without you. H

-

“Are you really going to go?” Y/N bit the sleeve of her sweater as she sat on her bed watching Harry pack his clothes into his luggage. After this past week, he was able to pick most of his stuff up from his house. Now Y/N’s apartment was more claustrophobic than usual. A couple of days ago, he also posted his statement. Luckily most of his fans understood him, even though there is still some backlash about it.

“I disappointed my fans enough. I think I should.” He itches his nose and sits down beside her. “You’re going to be a good girl for me while I’m gone right.” Her cheeks turn red as she shyly nods.

“I’ll miss you.”

“I’m going to miss you too.” he kisses her 

“I need to find a job or else my mom is going to cut me off and make me move back home.”

“I’ll figure something out. Don’t worry about it.” He kisses her neck. “Did you forget your boyfriend is a mega-millionaire?”

“He’s also married.” She teases him back. Fortunately, her anxiety hasn’t been that bad due to Harry being by her side 24/7. She was getting used to being in their bubble all the time. 

“Not in 6 months.” his tongue dips out of his mouth as he gives her little kisses on her chest. “You’re really beautiful did you know that?”

“I think you’re gorgeous.” She bites her lip as she takes in the smell of his cologne on her pillow. It’s been nice waking up to him every morning. Something she has not been able to really do ever since they started seeing each other.

“Mmm, really.” He looks up her at her as he slowly raises her thin T-shirt. “Are you trying to get some extra brownie points before I leave?” He kisses her belly button. 

“Maybe?” She squints her eyes and smiles at him.

“I love you, Y/N. I hope you know that.”

“I love you.” She reaches for him again so they can kiss. His hands quickly hold onto her waist as she sits up and tries to remove his shirt. “You’re going to be leaving me again” She whispers to him while she stares into his green eyes.

“I’ll be thinking of you every day.”

“Without you, I’m scared. Promise you’ll stay by my side.”

“I’ll check on you daily. I got you as long as you got me.” He gives her a cheesy smile making her eyes light up. He leans down to kiss her once more as he guides her to lay down on the bed. “Remember the first time I fucked you? On your dining room table.”

“Mhm.” Y/N hums as she feels his hands take off her shorts. 

“How about that time after we got back together and I ate you out on the plane?”

“Harry.” She bites her lip while she watches him rub his two fingers on her wet center. 

“You’re such a good girl for daddy yeah?”  He slips his fingers underneath the fabric then gives it a taste. “I’m going to miss the way you like crazy baby.” he bits his lip as he sits on his knees. He takes her legs and opens them a bit wider. His hands roam her body as if this was the last time they were going to be together.

“I want you now.” She lifts her shirt up as she watches Harry grope her breasts. 

“Patience bub.” He smirks at her as his hands take her underwear off. “You’re my baby.” He softly bites her nipple. “My precious girl.” He kisses the spot where her heart is. “I think you were made for me.” 

She smiles softly as she kisses the same spot on his body. “You deserve the world.”

“Aw fuck. I‘m so in love with you.” He smiles so happily as he looks up at her ceiling. He’s never felt like this with anyone except for her. It’s everything about her that reels her in. Her smile, her soft personality, her sweet kisses, and her loving soul. How did he miss out on her before?

“Well, don’t just say it. Show me.”

-

It’s been a month since Harry left for tour and although he promised to check on her every day -it stopped. 

At first, Y/N thought nothing about it. After all, maybe he’s just busy with his shows (you know since he’s touring the world but after a while, he stopped answering her texts. That’s when she knew he was doing it on purpose. 

At the moment, she was working at an art gallery in East Los Angeles. Luckily, she was working in the offices upstairs sorting their finances. It was hard at first finding a job and that was something she never told Harry.

Every record label and management wanted nothing to do with her. Y/N could barely leave the house without a group of girls whispering behind her back. Lastly, she still had new recent paparazzi pictures of her on daily mail.

Without Harry, she felt lonely and excluded from everyone else in Los Angeles. She still cried herself to sleep on some nights because she just felt like an overall disappointment.

/

Knocks on her door make her confused as she cooked herself some lunch in the kitchen. Dusting her hands off on her apron, she lets go of her knife and tomato and heads to the foyer.

“Hello.” There she was. In real life. Harry’s ex-wife. Y/N has only seen her once and now that it was her second time, she still felt intimidated. 

“Hi.” Y/N unties her apron and hooks it on the hook beside her. She felt insecure to be in such a lousy outfit compared to her boyfriend’s supermodel ex-wife. 

“I’m sorry I came out of the blue. I got your address from my assistant and I wanted to speak to you.”

“Oh, that’s okay. Come inside. Did you see any paparazzi.”

“Harry told me to go through the back.” Does she still speak to Harry? He’s been ignoring me for a few days now. 

“Um Okay. Would you like anything?”

“No.” She gives a soft smile as she looks around her apartment. She eyes Harry sweater laying on the other couch and takes a swallow. “I wanted to see you face to face than through call. Plus I wanted to see the apartment my husband would sneak off to every night.”

“I’m sorry about what Harry and I did to you.”

“Don’t mention it.” She shakes her head. “You’re just sorry because you got caught.” Y/N’s eyes widen. “I didn’t come here to fight with you. I came here to get some closure so I can move on with my life. We sold our house in hidden hills. Although my marriage was broken I think being publicly humiliated was traumatizing enough.”

“I understand.” she tucks her hair behind her ear.

“Do you love him?”

“Yes.”

“Does he make you feel special? Make you feel like your the only girl in the world?” She eyes her apartment once more. “Does he fuck you until you forget your own name?”

“I’m sorry what the fuck.” Y/N stands up and crosses her arms. “What are doing here? Get to the point.”

“I’m just here to tell you that whatever he makes you feel right now, it’s going to disappear. After all, he’s famous. He can have anything in the world. It won’t take too long until he gets tired of you.”

“Get out of my apartment.”

“You should’ve gotten out of my marriage before you weaselled yourself in bitch!”

“Leave!” Y/N shouts. As she takes the woman’s Gucci bag and throws it towards her door. After she left, Y/N couldn’t help but cry and lose her appetite for lunch.

I’m a whore. I’m a whore. I’m nothing but a whore.

~

She was starting to get used to having a pale life. Where there were no butterflies or colours. No new exciting promotions or scenarios at work. Now she adapted to a routine of eat, sleep and repeat. 

What sparked her day differently today, however, was the arms wrapped around her as she woke up in her sheets. It was him. 

“Harry?” She slowly opens her eyes as she turns onto her back to see him half-awake as he laid down on the pillow beside her. 

“Hi.” He gives her a soft smile. 

“What are you doing here?” She sits up and looks at her phone. “Don’t you have a show tomorrow in Canada?”

“Mhm. I missed you though.” He pulls himself closer to her and kisses her arm. 

“You’ve been ignoring my texts this past week.” She pushes her arm off him and pouts.

“That’s because I was busy and I was scared I might tell you my little secret a bit too early.”

“What?”

“Get dressed.”

~

Y/N kept silent as she watched Harry drive in his car. She sat in the passenger seat observing the way he drove. One of his hands on the wheel as the other held her hand. The shades on his eyes resting so pretty on the bridge of his nose. He was such a dream to look at. 

“How have you been, baby? How’s that job at the art gallery?” He glances at her before pulling his hand away so he can take a bite out of her bagel. It was the early morning so the sun was just about to rise as they continue to drive forward.

“It’s been boring. No one has been really talking to me. If they do, they ask if I can get you to meet them.” She rolls her eyes and takes his arm so she can take a bite of the bread in his hand. 

“Your boyfriend is famous? He can’t be that popular?”

“He was actually trending for a few days.” She smiles. “How have you been?”

“I’m still getting shit from my management because of what happened a month ago.” He takes another bite of the bagel as he keeps his eyes on the road. “You know, I think if the gossip sources would stop talking about it, everyone could move on. This is about us not them. They’re just judging us without any mercy.”

“I know.” Y/N thinks back about the death threats flooding her Instagram dms. 

“We’re here.” Harry signals his light as he turns into a long-hidden driveway. Suddenly a big beautiful white home comes into view. Y/N never thought houses this big would be in Malibu.

“Who’s house is this?” She asks as she gazes at the beautiful sunset behind the home. The ocean was beautiful as the sunlight reflected against it. Harry ignores her as they both approach the main door.

Y/N was waiting for him to knock or call the owner but instead, he opens it. “Harry, you can’t do that!” He smiles and looks at her.

“Why not?” He walks in and looks straight at the big window showing the water. 

“This isn’t your house.”

“True.” He shrugs his shoulders and turns himself towards her. He takes his hands and rests them on her waist. 

“Then uh who’s is it?” She widens her eyes and looks around the beautiful big home. 

“It’s ours.” 

“What? Is this why you’ve been ignoring my texts?” he nods as she jumps into his arms. 

“I was a bit busy decorating a new home and running a world tour.”

“I love you. I hope you know that.” She gives a small smile and hides her face in his chest.

“I love you too baby.” He smiles and spins her around. “I’m sorry for all the shit I put you through.”

“It’s okay. Thank you for the new home.” she pulls away and looks at the view in front of them. She takes a big gulp and looks at him.

And as much as Harry thought this was his happy ending with the girl he loves, he never took into account how much their exposed affair has impacted her. 

He never realized that she didn’t want to stay in California anymore. That she feels like a new stranger in this life that she built. That her dream career was taken away from her. What’s going to happen? Can love truly sustain them both as reality continues to stuff their consequences down their throats?  

“As much as I want to live here with you here, Harry… I don’t think I can. I don’t think I’m ready.”   

“Y/N.” Harry was not expecting that answer. “It will be like the usual you know, you already know what to expect.” He tries to convince her.

“No, I won’t.” She shakes her head. Why does she have to always be the one to ruining things for them? Maybe, because on the inside, she feels like a house can’t make her feel better about her new life? “You’re going to be gone most of the time. What happens if we end up like your marriage?”

“Don’t you see I’m trying?” He speaks a bit more in a serious tone. “I know with your new job you won’t be able to live in your shoebox apartment without your mum’s help. I want to take care of you!”

“What are people going to think? You’re living with your mistress!”

“Fuck what people think! I thought you said we were going to be in this together.” He was confused. Why couldn’t she just live with him in this house he bought for her.

“Harry, I did say that and I still do but don’t force me to move in with you. I’m not ready.”

“What can possibly be holding you back?” His voice softens. 

“My life is falling apart and being picked every day!” She rubs her eyes in frustration.

“Everyone knows we’re together, isn’t that what you wanted.”

“Not like this, Harry. You know that.”

“Yeah, I do but it happened. Now we can just be together despite what they say about our cheating scandal.”

“No one wants to hire me” She looks at him again with disappointment in her eyes. 

“You have a job already at the gallery. What do you mean?”

“The owner owes a favour to my mom but I can’t use anything useful with all the experience I have. Every management and label rejected me before I could even get an interview.”

“Are you saying all of this is my fault.” He scoffs. “Y/N, it's a job. There are tons more out there that you can use your experience for.”

“I don’t think you understand how important my job was to me.”

“The job that I got you?” He sarcastically replies back. “I’ll try and get you-”

“Shut up.” She rolls her eyes. 

“Okay fine, you don’t want to move in with me. Where do we go from here?” He lets out a sigh and looks around the home. He was mad they weren’t going to live here but he didn’t want her to leave him.

“I don’t know.”

“It’s okay. I understand. You can leave, they all do.”  Y/N immediately looks away from the window and looks at him instead. 

“Who said I was leaving. I love you.” She raises her hand next to his. “We can wait until I feel like I’m ready to start a new chapter.”

“Actually I have a plan.” He smiles mischievously at her and pulls her out of the home.

Thankfully, Harry brought her to a hidden beach where they could spend some time together after being apart for so long. They spent hours talking about their lives and new things they haven’t shared with each other before.

Y/N even told him everything about how she’s been feeling these past few days. She came to the decision that Los Angeles isn’t for her anymore. And although she would love to live with Harry, she needed to figure out her life first. After all, this was her only serious relationship.

And because he was so understanding and patient with her after he learned about everything she was hiding from him. He made sure to be the boyfriend he should’ve been a year ago.

That’s when she knew he had to marry her.

~

2 years later…

“Harry!” Y/N calls him from the stairs. 

It’s been two years since they began to date publicly after their affair was exposed. Luckily a few months after, his divorce was finalized and the media laid off their backs. 

Now the couple lives happily together in their new home but it isn’t in Malibu but instead his home in London where he first brought her to. It’s were they made up and realized that they belong to each other -this had to be their home. And suddenly it felt like London belonged to them where they can start a new chapter in their lives. There was barely any paparazzi here and everyone accepted Y/N with open arms, especially Anne. 

“What’s wrong, babe?” He runs down the stairs with a gym towel on his shoulder. 

“Take Evelyn please.” She gently gives their 1-year-old baby to her Finacé. “I have to run down the office. Louis needs me.”

Funny enough when they moved to London, a job offer was presented to her from Harry’s bandmate Louis Tomlinson. Due to their long term time hiatus from the band, he decided to start his own management company and help aspiring artists start their journey off in the right hands. 

Now, Y/N worked as a marketing agent for the company. Although there was no Rob or Marissa, she did find herself having more memories here at fearless management. 

Maybe the only thing left to do is get married?

You taught me a secret language

I can't speak with anyone else

And you know damn well

For you, I would ruin myself

A million little times

[rockinlibrarian]

Fic Writer Review

@pixiedane tagged everyone on this, and considering I've been wallowing in my sudden Being Into Fanfic lately (though to be honest I've been READING a lot lately more than writing), see this link, I figured I'd take her up on the challenge. You, too, may take ME up on the challenge if YOU have been writing fic!

how many works do you have on AO3? 19. That's much less than @pixiedane! I'm a baby fic writer!

what’s your total AO3 word count? 66,239

how many fandoms have you written for and what are they? There are technically seven listed, but "Marvel Cinematic Universe," "The Avengers (Marvel Movies)," "Captain America (Movies)," and "Agent Carter (TV)" all apply to the same fic, so really just 4. But that doesn't count fandoms I've written but not completed (and therefore posted) for. So there are more to come. Maybe. Sometime.

what are your top 5 fics by kudos? *

"On the End of Endgame," 51 kudos, because I'm right and Marvel doesn't understand their own time travel rules and 51 people KNOW it!

"The Puppy-Fly Effect," 39 kudos, because it's Back to the Future, the most mainstream property I've written for! So people see it and say, "oh, I've actually seen that one" and they're more likely to read it!

"The Invitation: an Epilogue," 22 kudos, which is pretty good since this is my newest fic on there. It's a Howl's Moving Castle (BOOK, PLEASE, OBVIOUSLY) epilogue, so considering it's not a RECENT thing it just keeps getting slow and steady readership. I myself have been reading a lot of Howl fic lately, and people are getting comments on their decade-old stories from me now, so I imagine this one also will slow and steadily keep accumulating hits and kudos.

"Kerry and the Meaning of Life," 20 kudos. I'm honestly not sure why this is, by far, my most kudoed Legion FX fic. It's the first one I ever wrote, and got me started on the whole writing-the-entire-Loudermilk-coming-of-age rabbit hole I fell into to begin with, but I've only improved over time, I think, but even after I'd posted other Loudermilk backstory I think is objectively better, this one still gets the most!

"Syd's (Third) Childhood Begins," 15 kudos, because when people finish watching Legion FX the NATURAL move is to seek out fix-it fic. I wouldn't say this is fix-it really as much as ensure-the-ending-is-actually-happy-it, but I did use the "fix-it" tag, and at least one of the commenters DID say they immediately came on AO3 "looking for pretty much exactly this"...

do you respond to comments, why or why not? Absolutely, because I know what it feels like NOT to get comments, and also what it feels like to-- I don't know, I just get paranoid, if people don't respond to me, I think stuff like "Did I say something wrong? Do they not care about my opinion? Am I invisible?" so I'm Do Unto Others-y about it, even if all I can think of to say is "Thank you!"

what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? Well, I haven't actually posted (read: finished) the ending yet, but it's definitely "Exploration of the Astral Plane," because that's just Legion FX canon. No spoilers, Oliver Bird starts out the show having gotten lost decades ago, and this is the story of HOW he got lost, and his friends didn't KNOW if they'd ever see him again, so the paragraphs I've written of the end do make me quite teary! The fic's really fun despite the canonically sad ending, though, honest!

do you write crossovers? if so what is the craziest one you’ve written? I have not written one YET, if I recall, unless you count the several mildly interconnected IPs involved in the Pipeweed Mafia Stories, which isn't even posted because I feel uncomfortable posting Real People fic online, but crossovers are fun and I really enjoy reading them, especially when the writer successfully blends things together while being true to the characters. Just today I read a hilarious one blending The Good Place and Harry Potter!

have you ever received hate on a fic? Gosh, this is such an ironic question. I wouldn't say that I WISH I received hate on a fic, but my fics aren't even NOTICED enough to receive hate! I already feel paranoid-- Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, you know how it is-- when I don't receive LIKE on a fic! It's LIKE receiving hate for me, because my brain goes into "Does nobody like it? Does nobody care? Are they all too nice to say it's terrible?" mode, so, yeah.

do you write smut? if so what kind? Absolutely not. My demisexual self hates reading it, definitely not writing it. I struggled enough writing just a taste of what a horny, slutty teenager who-talks-too-much Oliver Bird would have been in this AU, and that's mild!

have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of. That would really suck, wouldn't it, if someone stole my work and ended up getting MORE LIKES AND COMMENTS THAN ME on it.

have you ever had a fic translated? Also not that I'm aware of, and if I'm not aware of it but it happened I guess that would answer the "stolen" question, too.

have you ever co-written a fic before? Ever in my entire life, I feel like I must have, but not anything I've posted online then

what’s your all time favorite ship? Hmm. Honestly, there are ships I defend passionately if the topic comes up, but I'm not sure I have a favorite just on my own. Especially as I hate smut, so I avoid seeking out specifically shipping stories. But, since I have been reading a lot of HMC fic lately, I should mention that Howl and Sophie ARE one of my absolute favorite fictional couples, but that's just how DWJ wrote them, and I can tell you unfortunately that not all fanfic writers QUITE nail that chemistry...

what’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? Speaking of The Good Place, I really do wish I could write the novelization, and maybe I'd write some pieces of it longer than the few paragraphs I have written? But I doubt I ever will, let alone to the point of FINISHING...

what are your writing strengths? Fanfic wise, I like to THINK I understand the characters very well, at least! Writing in general? I think it's just my quirky voice? I'm the only me.

what are your writing weaknesses? Oh, very much FINISHING. But beyond that, it's pulling teeth to get me to fill out the story sometimes. I tend to draft with dialogue, and then I have to go back and fill in what's actually happening AROUND the dialogue, and sometimes I'd rather not.

what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? At first I was like, I don't KNOW any other languages well enough to do this! And then I remembered the Firefly fic I have mostly written but not completed yet, and you know how in the show their speech is peppered with random Mandarin phrases? My husband has the Firefly RPG book and there's an appendix of Mandarin phrases you might hear in the Firefly universe, and I DID incorporate a few of those phrases into my dialogue, just from that appendix and it's probably horrible, but it fit the universe...

what was the first fandom you wrote for? EVER? The earliest I'm sure about is the Ducktales fic I found in an old Girl Scout manual that I must have written when I was 11 or 12. The first fandom I ever posted on AO3, in response to an exchange, was Legion FX of course, but that wasn't until the ripe old age of 40.

what’s your favorite fic you’ve written? I'm going to give this one to "Two (or Three) Mutant Freaks Against the Fourth Grade" just because it has gotten the least number of hits of ANY of my posts, INCLUDING THE PLACEHOLDER WITH NO WORDS IN IT, so it needs more love. And it really is one of my favorites, because it's just a sweet little story about nerds making friends, and I love rereading it.

*This made me curious which fics got the most kudos comparative to their HITS, because the Endgame one has WHOA more hits than any other fic, but it's over a thousand, which doesn't make 51 kudos look so good anymore. Percentage-wise, it's less than 5%, which seems to be where most of my fics hit when you do the math-- between 4% and 8% kudos-to-hits. The exceptions, jumping up to about 18% each, are the BttF and HMC fics, and, curiously, my beloved childhood friend AU mentioned in the last question-- it may have the least number of HITS (22), but that helps the math when you consider it's got 4 kudos. The HIGHEST percentage kudos-to-hits is its sequel, the childhood-friends-as-teenagers-AU fic mentioned in question 5**-- it's got 6 kudos and only 29 hits, so that's about 20%! Apparently people LIKE when I have to write a sex-crazed adolescent boy. COME ON, people! (The story is actually about Asexuality so I guess it really isn't people just wishing I'd write smut).

**Oh, I just noticed the numbers renumbered themselves when I put bullet points in the middle of the original question 3 there, so this is actually the answer to question 8? But it SAYS FIVE.

[btsmakesmehappy]

Broken Vase | 1

Genre: Enemies to lover, Angst, Fluff, possible light smut in the future

Pairing: Agent!Namjoon x Agent!reader

Rating: 18+ (Mature Content)

Warning: cursing. public display of affection.

Word count: 5,6k

Chapter: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4  completed

Series Masterlist: The Company

Summary: You are one of the best agents in the Company, and so do Namjoon. After your last mission with him, you hate him and so do Namjoon. Suddenly, you assigned again with him as a married couple. How can you handle the mission, Kim Namjoon, and your emotional wound?

a/n: Hello! This is my second fiction! After a few considerations, I finally decided to write this! I realized that my grammar is not perfect because English is not my first language. But I hope you understand the main idea of the story. You can also (pleaseee) tell me if I have the wrong spelling or grammar. I will be very grateful <3 Oh and please let me know if you wanna be in the taglist!

edited: 26/05/2020

          You walked faster to your boss’s office. You got a mission this morning on the way to the Company, without any details. Well, it’s not that weird as this is your tenth year working in this field area. But you got a feeling that this mission is weird. You knocked on the door and when you heard the permission, you excused yourself to enter. In that office you find Jimin, your handler, who shared you a smile. And as you turned to your right, you found Namjoon and his handler, Jin.

           “Hello, agent L/n. Fancy seeing you here.” Namjoon smirked. “Tardy as always?” He scanned your body from top to bottom. Your hair tied into a messy bun, you only used a tint on your lips, and your collar is a mess inside your black blazer. Your black pants –which you wear for 3 days- have a faint ketchup stain from yesterday’s lunch in your thigh. Well as he said, you definitely need to use more time after waking up to do your make up and pick a more appropriate suit.

           “Mind your own fu.. business, Agent Kim” You almost cursed in front of your boss, lucky to you, Jimin stepped your feet before you said anything you would regret. “I am sorry I am late, boss.”

           “The important thing is that you all are here.” Your boss cleared his throat. “So, this Company knows that Agent L/N and Agent Kim are both magnificent agents, maybe the best in this Company.” He sighed. “ So you both are assigned in the next mission.”

           “wha-“ you frowned. All of the people in The Company knew that you and Namjoon are rivals. You both have never be assigned in the same mission for the last five years. Both of you two specialize in a different field, Namjoon in the strategical field which usually involves in political things while you usually work in the more aggressive field which involves fighting and guns. And only God knows why your junior and even the higher up in the company always keep comparing both of you. The last time you both worked together, you ended in a very bad fight with him. Even though the mission ended quite well, the emotion and the fight are still there until now.

           “What is the mission?” Namjoon asked. You studied his face at glance. He is also uncomfortable with the thought of working with you. But this is work. You must be professional.

           “I’ve already sent the details to your handlers. In short, there is a threat aimed at minister Lee. It said that it will disclose this nation’s confidential data to the public next week if the minister doesn’t cooperate.”

           “What is the confidential data? And what does the cooperation even mean?” You questioned the insufficient data. “Is the source trusted?”

           “The threat sent to This company, and even the Blue house. At first, we thought, it is not trusted. But if such a threat sent to the most secure places without traces, the higher-ups think that it would be dangerous and could happen. And the ambiguous thing about data and the cooperation are still unknown.” You and Namjoon shared a glance with a furrowed brow. There is nothing you can do with this amount of data, it is basically nothing. The boss continued his explanation. “In a few days, Minister Lee is going to a Tour with his wife in Hawaii. And we assumed that the cooperation should be done at that time. Because we don’t know what that is, we assigned the both of you to join the tour. You know, in cover.”

           “Why should we be on a cover? We can use the security protocol for bodyguards as always.” Namjoon is unsatisfied with this mission and so are you. It is awkward enough already to be in the same room with him or even the fieldwork. But in disguised? That’s terrible. If it’s in your usual fieldwork, you wouldn’t bother to talk to him and just talk with others, but this? You will and only talk with each other. The thought of that only makes your hands go clammy.

           “Because we ONLY have that amount of data so we can’t be careless! So that’s why we decided to do it naturally. We choose both of you because you are the best in this company and we can’t afford to tell many people so we decided to use fewer agents as possible. Even the minister should have no idea about your identity. I hope you will understand.” Your boss looked at both of you apologetically. “I know that you both are not in the great term, but this is work and I hope you can get along well and be professional. Your jobs are to protect Minister Lee and his wife and seek the meaning of the threat. Every clue you got should be sent to the company and we will take care of the rest. Do you both understand?”

           You took a deep sigh. “Yes sir.”

           Namjoon also nodded. “We will try.”

           “Good. You are all dismissed and good luck.”

          “I can’t believe I will work with him again!” You threw your bag in your desk angrily. Jimin, who was following behind you, startled with your sudden anger.

           “You said that you don’t mind!” He angrily sat on your chair.

           “wha- What do you mean? I never said anything.”

           “A few minutes ago, in front of the boss. And you said that you are not mad of him or whatever.” Jimin took out a binder from his bag and put it on your desk. “And besides, It’s not that I can choose who will work with you! You know that I don’t have that authority!”

           You sighed. Jimin is right. There’s nothing you can do for now. The only thing you can do is work this case as fast as possible. You opened the binder and study it. You will be joining the 5 days-tour in Hawaii as Jung Nara, 28 years old. You will go to Hawaii as a honeymoon. You just married a week ago to a man named Jung Yoon Hyung, a businessman overseas of Jung enterprises, specialized in art exportation, aged 29 years old. You knitted a brow. “Jung Yoon Hyung? Who? Don’t tell me that he is-?”

           “Yes. You are going to be Namjoon-hyung’s wife. Well, rich wife if I may add. Maybe this is going to be your luxurious assignment ever, Y/n!” Jimin said, tried as positive as ever with cautious eyes. Jimin has been your handler for 3 years now and so far, he is the only one who always stays in your anger situations and other frustrations. You always listen to him, and if he insists you do this job, you just can’t refuse. Well, not that you can’t refuse in the first place.

           You shook your head in disbelief. This can’t be happening. It is not that you hate him. It is just that you don’t want to be with him. Is it the meaning of hatred?

           Sure he is excellent in his job. He always thinks maybe 10 steps ahead with every different route as a back-up plan. He is the type of guy who is great at negotiation, the best. Namjoon always wants to be in a safe place. He doesn’t want to take a risk. While you are more of an ambush type of agent. That’s why he is different from you. You are a fire, while he is water.

           So after the mission 5 years ago, you both always assigned in different missions. You asked-begged, to not work with him. Yes, you hate him. You hate how calm he was. You hate how he stopped you before. You hate how he told you to trust him. You hate how he ended make you disappointed. You hate how he never apologize to you. You hate how he just talked to you after like nothing happened. You hate how he looked at you. You hate him.

           You sighed. But it is in the past. It is your job. And you have to do it, like it or not.

           “Come on, Joon! It can’t be that bad! You see.. 5 night in a 5-star hotel in Hawaii with all expenses included, you should think of it as a holiday!” Jin tried to calm his friend, who became a huge pile of a mess after reading the binder.

           “You saw her eyes, hyung! How could we look like a couple when her eyes show that she wants to murder me!” he was walking back and forth in his small office, almost knocked down the furniture in the way. Even though he is one of the best agents in the company, it still can’t hide the fact that he is a clumsy guy. So God is fair after all, Jin thought.

           “Firstly, that’s because you always work her up. Just once, for god sakes stop trying to get on her nerves! And secondly, it’s been five years! Why are you still mad with her?” Jin folded his arms across his chest.

           “I just.. We just think differently, and it’s tiring to talk with a hot-headed woman like her.” He sat on his chair, opening his binder again.

           “Well, just suck it up. That hot-headed woman will be yours for 5 days, and please for the love of God, stop the childish bickering. It’s tiring not only for you but for me and Jimin.” He put his hand through his hair in desperation. “And this is just once okay. The higher-ups are also desperate because we don’t any clue whatsoever. It’s not that they want to put two-people-who-want-to-rip-each-other-heads-off in the same mission.”

           “Hey! It is her who wants to rip my head off, not the other way around.” Namjoon yelled.

           “You know what. I don’t fucking care if you want to rip her head, her arms, or even her suit. Just fucking study that. I’m outta here” Jin said as he slammed the door of Namjoon’s office. Namjoon has never seen Jin that worked up since the last 7 years they worked together. The last time Jin’s that mad is when Namjoon complained about how he got wet wipes and beef jerky as christmas present.

           He took a deep breath. Does Namjoon hate you?

           That thinking has been disturbing his head for a while now. He always thinks you are a wonderful agent. You are strong and fast even to him. He has never won if both of you go through sparring in the past. You always have a way to use your small figure to your advantage. He respects you and how you are so passionate about this job.

           But after that mission,- incident- 5 years ago, somehow he lost all of that feeling.

           He hates you. He hates how you are always so emotional. He hates how you insisted to go. He hates how you didn’t trust him. He hates how you made him disappointed. He hates how you never want to talk to him again. He hates you.

           After many heated discussions, the day has come. You both forced to sit with each other in the luxurious car, as Jin was driving you to the airport.

           “I thought you’re rich, why are we in a commercial airport?” you asked sarcastically.

           “Well, I only have an overseas business, not a goddamn country, princess.” Namjoon replied. “and even if I have, I’d rather not sit in the plane with you.”

           You snorted “Like I want to. Just shut the fuck up.”

           “Hey, you started it first.” he gawked in disbelief. “So, shut the fuck up.”

           “For the love of God, please stop this unimportant childish squabble, I am trying to drive here.” Jin sighed and parked the car in the drop off area. He then poked his head to the passenger seat. “I don’t fucking care. As soon as you stepped out of this car, you both are encouraged, hell, forced to act like a lovey-dovey couple, if you want to keep this job.” He eyed Namjoon.

           “Fine, hyung” Namjoon sighed and then stepped out of the car.

           “That warning goes to you too Y/N. Even though I am not your handler, I still can get your ass kicked if you choose not to follow this order.” Jin warns.

           “But-“ your eyes trained to Jimin who sat beside Jin.

           “You should go out too, Y/N, Jin-hyung is right. I wish you very good luck.” Jimin smiled, his eyes turn into a crescent. You finally gave up and go out of the car, as your door opened by Namjoon.

           “Come on babe, let’s go to our honeymoon” Namjoon reached out your hand. His dimple shows as he smiles at you, a smile which you have never seen in the entire time you work with him. At some point you feel the urge to punch him in the face and also want to put your finger in his dimple. And what do you do? The second one. If this is the type of fighting he pursues, you want to make sure that he knows too. Game on.

           It is not the first time for you to act. You always enjoy watching k-dramas and movies. You act while you’re daydreaming before you go to sleep every night. Hell, you have worked in this field for 10 years. You have acted, be in cover, for many times. Yet, this still feels weird for you. Maybe if you kissed with Jungkook when you worked in Macau or danced with Hoseok in governor’s ball bomb incident, you will be glad if those were weird. But Noooo. It is now the strangest, weird, awkward feeling you have ever experienced.

           You have already checked in and put your baggage. So you walked in duty-free shops with Namjoon as he holding your hand. He sometimes looked to you with such loving eyes which makes your knees go weak. How he did this so easily? And why you couldn’t do the same? Why you felt so nervous around him? You despised him, but why this feels right?

           Namjoon used his free hand to put your hair behind your ear. “What are you thinking?” He smiled, not the smile you often see back in the company. But it is the smile who makes you, well, for now, nauseous. You don’t even realize that you are already in the waiting room.

           “Is this necessary though?” you asked softly. Your eyes wandered, never meeting his gaze. Is this affection necessary? Basically anyone who sees us now has nothing to do with the mission.

           He tilted his head to the side and smile, “This honeymoon? Yes, it is necessary since it is maybe the only time we can go on holiday now. And it’s already paid for. And I just want to have a holiday with my beautiful wife.” He kissed your temple softly. I know what you’re feeling. I, too, don’t want to do this as much as you. But we can’t be bothered to have people questioned our roles.

           “Fine.” You sighed as you release his hand, and you wrap your hands on his waist, buried your head in his chest from the side. He smiled and patted your hair. “I just hope Hawaii is nice.” God. If you resigned from this job, later on, you would be accepted to Broadway.

           He chuckled, “I promised babe, and even Hawaii isn’t nice, we just need to spend our time in the hotel, right?” He winked as you hit his shoulder coyly. Your face grew hotter and you swore in your heart you will kill him after this mission.

           “Oh you are going to honeymoon in Hawaii?” A short haired-woman interrupted you. “You are going to love it! Hawaii is a great place!” You studied her face, and you almost shocked as you recognized her in instant. She is Minister Lee’s wife.

           “See babe? Even she agrees with me.” Namjoon laughed, his eyes twinkled. See, this Y/n? “My wife here actually wants to go to Jeju. But I wanted to go somewhere special for our honeymoon.”

           “I just want to be with you, I don’t even care wherever we go.” You pouted as you fixed your gaze to him. You feel him tensed a bit and you smile as you happily knew that he is taken aback with what you’re saying.

           “Oh my God, why are you so cute! You made me remember about my honeymoon too. So how long have you been married?” She asked. Her eyes showed pure curiosity.

           “We’ve been married for a week.” You beamed your most happy smile to her. “Are you going to Hawaii too?”

           “Yes, my husband and I are having a holiday too, so we decided to go to Hawaii.” She then nudged his husband, Minister Lee, and the three of you just bowed your head as a gesture. The boarding announcement rang then she and her husband stood up to go to the gate. “Well, say hi if you cross path with us! Nice to meet you!”

           You waited for some minutes for them to walk away before you squinted at Namjoon. “You saw her before, didn’t you?” Namjoon just gathered your carry-on and shrugged.

           “I don’t know what do you mean, babe. I’m hurt that you questioned my sincerity, you know.” He laughed while took your hand in his, gesturing you to the gate.

           This motherfucker

, how can you survive this 5 days with him?

           If you find Namjoon annoying, then you will find his handler, Jin, is annoyingly annoying. Jin somehow has contacted the stewardess in the plane to give you a 1-week-anniversary cake from your husband who literally had no idea and had to pretend to know. Jin also specially requested the stewardess to make it like a big celebration that ended in you and Namjoon to share a kiss with everyone around you clapped like a seal. You almost screamed and gagged at how this is so fucking cheesy and embarrassing while you needed to act like you are the luckiest woman in the earth, and it is tiring you. You believed that embarrassment will cost you 5 years of your life. And when you whispered this in Namjoon’s ear, he just laughed and kissed your forehead lovingly. Jerk.

           Minister Lee’s wife, who ‘coincidentally’ sits across you always gave a huge smile in her face in that chaotic celebration. It seems that she is a hopeless romantic woman and you amused at how deep Jin and Namjoon investigated her and it gave you goosebumps. Even though they both are a pain the ass, they are still one of the best teams in the company.

           You glad that you got a first-class seat, which made you and Namjoon have a nice amount of distance for yourselves. After an hour, you found Namjoon has already fallen asleep. You, as his wife, casually put his blanket and stroked hair while looking at his face. Namjoon’s snores are getting better, you thought. You remember 5 years ago when you trying to sleep in the same room with him for several days. ‘trying’ as you ended couldn’t sleep because the snores are just so bad. After you thought that was an appropriate amount to act as a loving wife, you lazily picked any movies you saw in your mini-TV.

           “That was so sweet of him! You are a lucky woman.” Minister Lee’s wife said happily.

           “Yes, I think I am. He is a great guy” You laughed shyly. “But sometimes I don’t think if he will do the same 10 years, 20 years later. You know? But that’s not the problem for you I assumed? You go on holiday alone with your husband is just as romantic. It is just like a second honeymoon!”

           “Really? Well my husband isn’t a romantic type of guy. But being asked for a holiday just the two of us, I think is kinda romantic.” She thought. “But I don’t know about the second honeymoon thing. He tells me he is going to work there.”

           “Oh, I see. But it still a nice gesture!” You smile assuringly. “So your husband is a businessman too?”

           “He works at the ministry.” She smiled. “I assumed you don’t live here often?”

           You acted to be as awkward as possible. “Ah, yes kinda. We just came here to get married. But we live in Canada. Well, because of my husband’s job, we are rarely at home too.” You laughed.

           “That’s fun too. Because you are both still young. So what does he do?”

           “He works in art exportation, so we often go to one museum and another. But actually.” Your voice quietened. “I have no idea what he is doing. Whenever he talks about his works, I just nod along.”

           She laughed. “I know your feeling! But my husband rarely talks to me about work. So that’s why I don’t really know why we came to Hawaii. I only knew he wanted to meet his college friend there.”

           College friend. Maybe I will search for it. “Oh my bad, I haven’t introduced us to you properly. I am Jung Nara, and my sleeping husband there is Jung Yoon Hyung. It is really nice to meet you.”

           “Oh my, I didn’t even realize it. I talked to you like a long lost friend you know. I am Lee Dahee and My husband there is Lee MyunSoo. Nice to meet you too.”

           It has been not that long since you came to Hawaii. You loved the ambiance and the salty air of Hawaii. You loved summer since you are a kid, but since your mission two years ago, you just hate it. And this time, with your enemy beside you, you have been nothing but a ball of anxiousness when you first set your foot on this island. Your hands became clammy, and the sun doesn’t help. It is a different mission, you will okay. You always nailed it. You muttered to yourself, a habit you have picked since you got the job in the company. After all, this type of job is full of uncertainty and danger, and the only thing you have is yourself.

          In the arrival, you and Namjoon searched for your names’ placard. When you found it, you realized the one who held the placard is the one you worked with before. As you literally walk faster- almost running to hug the man. “Hey I miss you so much Yoongi!”

           “Hush. No saying real names, Jung Nara ssi.” As he hugged you tighter. “I am happy to see you this fine.”

           The picture of you hugging the other man isn’t a pleasant sight for Namjoon. Namjoon then interrupted “Hi, I am Jung Yoon Hyung. Nice to meet you!”

           “Hi, Nice to meet you too. I heard about you so much.” He said while showing his gummy smile. “Let’s talk in the car then.” Yoongi then took your baggage and walked to the parking spot. Namjoon walked beside you as he put his hand behind your waist to guide you. After you loaded all of the baggage in the car and buckled up, the car started moving.

           Yoongi started as he looked at both of you in the rearview mirror, “So, we decided to put your room a few rooms beside the Minister’s room, because if there are dangerous situations you can act faster. But the thing is, the hotel itself has very tight security, that even Tae couldn’t install our devices in that room. And we couldn’t tell them about the threat because it is still unknown even to us.”

           “Wha- Tae is involved in this?” You gasped. “I thought he is still on leave.”

           “Well technically he is, but when I told him that you were coming here, he flew right away from his leave to Hawaii.” He laughed.

           “Really?” You touched. “Aw.. I miss hi-“

           “So if you couldn’t install our device then what can we do?” Namjoon interrupted. From the sound of his voice, he seems not happy with your little reunion.

           Yoongi turned to his work mode again. “That’s why I need to talk to you. Tae and I didn’t get permission to approach the target. So we hope you can find a way to install it. That’s your first mission.”

           You frowned, thinking. “So have the targets arrived in the hotel?” you asked.

           “No, Tae is the one who picks them up and I think, they are still on the way, behind us.”

           Your eyes twinkled. “Great. You should step on the gas then. I got an idea”. Your gazed fall to Namjoon. His eyes showed both curiosity and confusion. “Do you trust me?”

           By the time Minister Lee and his wife arrived at the hotel’s receptionist, you and Namjoon hop off the elevator and went to the receptionist. “Excuse me miss?” Namjoon called.

           The receptionist then signaled Minister Lee and his wife for a moment, “Yes can I help you?” You also nodded and wave to Dahee who is excited to see you.

           “Yes, actually we just checked our room, but it seems that our room has twin beds. We just want to ask you if by any chance you can change our room to a double bed?” Namjoon asked apologetically.

           The receptionist then looked into the computer to check. “I am deeply sorry sir, The hotel is all booked so I am afraid I can’t change your room.”

           Namjoon continued, “Really, can’t you do something for us? We are on our honeymoon so we hope to sleep in one bed but-“

           “Babe, that’s okay. You can’t do anything if the rooms all booked.” You held Namjoon’s hand. “Thank you miss, for checking.” And as you walk away from the receptionist you waved at the couple. The receptionist then gave the key to Dahee and gestured them to the elevator.

           Namjoon held you close from behind, with his chin propped on your head, as you both waiting for the elevator. When the elevator arrived, you both walked in. You pushed hold button when the couple going inside the elevator. “Oh Dahee ssi, what floor?”

           “We are on the third floor, how about you?” she answered.

           “Same with us, we are also on the third floor” You smiled. Your eyes were glassy, and Namjoon just caressed your shoulder to calm you. You wanted Dahee to notice this. When you arrived on your floor, you walk slower behind the couple in silence.

           As Dahee open her room, she called you “Nara ssi! Do you want to trade a room? I got a double bed. You don’t mind trade with them right, dear?” she asked her husband. Myunsoo just nodded and smile.

           You asked warily, “Really? It means a lot for us, but we really don’t want to bother you on your holiday.”

           “That’s okay! Besides we are friends now. Here.” She handed you her key. “You should bring your baggage in now.”

           Namjoon then dashed to your previous room to gather your things. While you stayed with Dahee. “Thank you. Thank you so much! Please let us repay you. Maybe dinner?”

           “It’s okay!” she laughed while dragged her baggage with her to her new room, her husband was following behind her. “You should have a nice honeymoon!”

           The couple and you went to the new rooms. After the room closed. You locked your door, while Namjoon opened the device from the baggage. He plugged the headset and listen to it. After some time, he then gave you a thumbs up. You pulled your work phone to call Yoongi.

           “It’s installed” you said proudly.

           “I literally hope so. If you failed then I will send you the bill of seventeen 5-stars-hotel rooms that you told me to book.” He almost yelled “Alright then. The plan will be continued as before. Have a rest and prepare yourself. I know acting can be tough.”

           “Alright Yoon. See you soon!” you turn your phone off. “Hey, can I wash up first? The cheesiness from before is making me sticky” Namjoon chuckled and nodded. As you went to the bathroom, he continued to listen to the earphone.

           His mind was wandering to the plan you made. The one where you installed all your spying devices in your previous room and made Dahee exchange the room with you. It is impulsive, but it is so you. You always use the power of your friendliness in your job. You really believed that Dahee will give up her room to you. And it is fascinating fo him how you befriended her so fast. If he wasn’t with you, he will just go with the next plans to the next one.

             But you are different. You always try so hard so the first plan is succeeded. For you, changing a plan is losing and failure. Yes, you are that stubborn. Maybe he will put that stubborn thing into the list of what he hates about you. But rather he grew another respect for you. Oh and that glassy eyes in the elevator? He didn’t want to admit to himself that it made him want to pull you in his arms.

           Namjoon and you decided to have dinner in the hotel’s restaurant to follow Dahee and Myunsoo. You put a beautiful summer dress on which Jimin picked for you and for the purpose of your cover, it is definitely an expensive one. Your baggage is full of designer clothes which you don’t recognize. Well, your closet in your apartment back home is full of formal shirts and suits for work, maybe some dresses in the corner. You look yourself from the mirror. The color red matches your skin tone perfectly, and the cutting of the dress accentuates your body curve. You put on makeup thinly and curl your hair into soft curls. It has been a long time since you dressed up like this. You always caught with works so you never hang out with friends.

           You heard a knock from the bedroom, “Y/N, let’s go I am hungry” Namjoon called. You look into the mirror once more and nodded. As you go out of the bathroom, your body collided to Namjoon. You wanted to yell at him but you stunned. Namjoon’s hair styled to the back, as you noted to yourself that it is your favorite hairstyle. He wore a blue shirt with khaki shorts. You always see him with a suit so this is definitely a new sight for you. He looks good. “Ready?” he asked as he grabbed your hand interrupting your daydreaming.

           When you finally sat down on your table, you waved to Dahee from across the room. Again, it is amusing to Namjoon. He watched you enjoying live music. “What?” you asked sweetly, turning into Jung Nara mode.

           He grabbed your left hand and kiss your knuckles. “Nothing.” He smiled sheepishly. “You look beautiful tonight.” His eyes looked to you, unwavering. As you felt your face grew hotter, your eyes trailed away from him. Namjoon laughed at your antics.

           “Shouldn’t we pick a closer seating?” as you glanced at the couple.

           “Do you want to sit closer to me? You should just say so.” He smirked. You kicked his leg and pouted.

           Jerkface.

           You both then eat silently while you subtly glanced at the couple and to the person in front of you. After you ensured that the couple has already returned to their room, you relaxed a bit. Namjoon excused himself to pay, and you took a walk in the lobby.

           BRAKK

           You turned your head to the source of the sound. You found a couple with two kids, the younger ones in the sling, and the older one held the woman’s hand. The man, you assumed is the father clumsily gathered the things he dropped. The pregnant woman, you assumed is the mother wanted to help him, but it seems with her big tummy she couldn’t bend over. You walked to them to give them a hand. But as you gathered, you felt a sharp sting in your back of your neck.

           Cautiously you walked back as fast as you could. Your hand touched the throbbing pain in your neck. Then you saw her smirked at you. You followed your instinct to run away from them. Your legs went weak, and your breath shortened. You felt your throat constricted. Still, you tried harder to run back to the restaurant.

           Luckily to you, Namjoon exited the restaurant and he called for you. “Babe, I am looking for you everywhere. Where have y—“ his words stopped as you fainted just a few meters in front of him. His eyes widened, showing shock and terror. “What- hey Y/N. not funny okay?” he whispered as he shook your body, but you didn’t even flinch. Fuck. He then carried you in his arms, told all of the spectators that you drank too much. He hurried to go back to your room.

           He opened and closed the door harshly, and put you in the bed. His minds went panic as he examined you thoroughly, your pulse’s weakening, your hands, and feet went cold, and your breaths became irregular. Namjoon is no doctor, but after training and work in this field for a long time, he somehow knows one or two things. He then searched for syringes in your bag, after checking the name and sure about it, he lifted your dress up to show your bare legs and injected the drug in your thigh. After a minute, you’re getting calmer. Namjoon reached your wrist and checked your pulse and sighed in relief. He calmed himself as he waited for you to awake.

           “-Joon.” You cried, your forehead’s sticky from sweat. As you control your breath, you reached his hand. He then helped you to sit and sat beside you. His eyes still showed worries. “Someone attacked me.”

[fruityutas]

smokey rooms

stoner!hendery x reader

lowercase intended 

not proofread

!this is a work of fiction and does not portray the characters in real life!

genre: angst, smut, fluff

wc: 3.6k

summary: hendery and his friends were bad news, but you never actively avoided them. he comes up to you one day and since then you were inseparable. too bad he caught you up in his spiraling lifestyle, and in the end, caused you both to get lost in it.

warning: this relationship starts fine, but progresses into a toxic one that should never be tolerated. there is drug use and illegal actions in this writing that is not being encouraged. also unprotected sex (WRAP IT BEFORE TAPPING IT BABES), the reader isn’t forced into sex, but is pressured into it, which is WRONG do not let people do that to you. cursing

this is my first attempt at something a little more suggestive than normal so hopefully, it isn’t that garbage but it probs is so bear with it.

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the bell awoke you from your uncomfortable slumber. you let everyone go before you as you packed your things. a body brushed past you roughly, knocking your binder off the desk. “what the fuck was that for?” you look up and meet eyes with hendery. he looks down at you and smiles.

 “oh, im sorry. i should really watch where im going, huh?” you were confused, why was hendery being so… nice? he picks up your binder and hands it to you. “your name is y/n, right?” you hum in response. he picks up your backpack and starts walking out. 

 “uhh, what are you doing?” he turns and glances at you. 

 “oh, i forgot to ask. wanna join me and my friends for lunch? we don't sit in the lunchroom though.” you thought for a second before nodding and following him. 

 “hendery, why are you inviting me?” he lazily looks at you, his eyes clearly red. “are you high?” he laughs and nods. 

 “yeah. you don't care about my friends and i smoking right?” you sigh but respond with a no. 

 “i wish you wouldn’t do that at school. you could get in trouble.” his face remains in a permanent smile as he throws his arm over your shoulder. 

 “yeah but they don’t care as long as i make good grades.” you shake your head while slipping out of his hold. 

 “you never answered my question” his face gets red and he starts to fidget. 

 “i just think you’re cute and i wanted to ask you out, but like after we get to know each other, ya know?” you stand there speechless as your face heats up. 

 “o-oh. really?” he nods his head and scratches his neck. 

 “uh, yeah i’ve liked you for a while actually.” you blush again and walk closer to him. he leads you out a back door and around to a secluded area where six other boys are. there were clouds of smoke being exhaled every few moments. as you and hendery walked up, they all turned to look at you.

 “hey man, what’s with her? she ain’t gonna snitch is she?” hendery walks forward and does what you assume is a handshake before denying that you’d sell them out.

 “you can ask her, right y/n? you wouldn’t tell no one?” you shook your head before walking closer to where they were standing. hendery grabs your hand before introducing his friends. “these are my friends. yukhei, kun, sicheng, xiaojun, ten, and yangyang.” you recognized kun, ten, and sicheng as seniors. you knew xiaojun, yukhei, and hendery were juniors, while you and yangyang were sophomores. 

 “so what made you wanna hang out with hendery?” kun asks you. his eyes were intimidating and it felt as if they pierced your soul.

 “oh, he actually asked me to join you guys today. i can leave though if you don’t want me to be here.” you started to grab your bag from hendery but he stopped you.

 “no, it’s fine y/n. they’re just a bunch of hardasses when it comes to new people.” kun rolls his eyes at hendery’s statement but smiles at you.

 “you want some?” kun holds out a blunt for you. you look at it and think about all the things that would happen if you did take it. hendery’s voice floated over to your ears,

 “you don’t have to if you don’t want. we won’t force you.” you look over at him and meet his honey eyes. even with the discoloration from his high, they were still beautiful. you look back at the blunt kun was holding out before taking it slowly.

 “um, how do you… smoke this?” yangyang and yukhei start to snigger while ten just straight up laughs at you. hendery scolds them, saying you obviously wouldn’t know how if you’ve never smoked before. kun rolls his eyes again before explaining it to you.

 “i’ll light it for you and just suck in but not too hard, or you’ll end up coughing a lung out. like a cigarette, ya know?” you nod before taking it in your mouth and letting him light it. you inhale and the smoke floods your lungs, setting them ablaze. it felt like a hot itch and it made you cough immediately. kun took the blunt back while patting your back. “do you guys have water?” ten pulls a bottle of water out of his bag and hands it to you. you thank him the best you can before taking a large gulp. when your coughing fit finally resides, hendery is by your side offering you some food. you decline before turning to kun.

 “let me try again if it’s ok.” the whole group looks surprised. your face turns red at their eyes being on you. kun hands you the blunt again and lights it again for you. this time, you inhale at a slower rate. the burn is less intense and you cough a lot less. you give what’s left of the blunt to kun and move closer to hendery. “that takes some getting used to.” he giggles like a little kid on a playground. as you converse with the group of boys, he plays with your hands. the effects of the weed were starting to take over, and having never felt it before, you freaked out a bit. the boys looked worried at this and hendery tried to calm you down. 

 “hey, y/n it’s ok. you’re fine nothing is wrong. hey, look at me, ok?” he turned your head to look at him and he gripped the sides of your face. he looked into your eyes and this calmed you. your breathing slowly returned to normal and you relaxed in his grip. “you better now?” you nodded. “probably not a good idea to smoke for the first time at school. do you want water?” 

 “yes please.” he hands you a bottle and you drink it carefully. the conversation goes back to normal after everyone makes sure you're ok. soon, the bell rings and you have to leave to go to class. hendery says goodbye to the group and walks you to your class. “are you not staying?”

 “no, me and the boys are leaving today to go to ten’s house.” you chew your lip nervously before biting the bullet. 

 “can i… come with? if that’s ok?” he looks surprised for a second before smiling at you. 

 “lemme text them real quick but i'm sure they won’t mind.” he pulls out his phone and sends a text, the reply coming back only a few seconds after. “they said they’d like that. i’m glad they took a liking to you, i hope you stick around.” you smile to your self as the both of you walk out the school and towards the parking lot. some of the boys are already there when you get there, and they say hello to you. ten tells you to sit next to him upfront, much to the protest of yangyang, whom he shushes saying that you’re always aloud in the front if you ride along. you giggle and stick your tongue out while he climbs in the back with hendery and kun. 

 “so y/n, why the sudden rebellion? could it be because of our dear hendery?” you blush at ten’s remark and look at hendery through the mirror, who is also blushing.

 “i mean, yeah i guess.” your voice comes out in an embarrassed mumble. ten and kun snicker and yangyang rolls his eyes, grumbling about how hendery is already whipped. the ride is filled with the chatter of the boys, and you stay quiet and listen to their conversations. when you pull into ten’s driveway, hendery jumps out of the car to open your door for you. “thank you. so like, are ten’s parents not home?”

 “nah, they left this weekend so we have his house to ourselves.” you hum in response and lean into his as you walk up the sidewalk. ten lets everyone in and starts heading towards a basement. the basement is finished with couches and a gaming system set up, likely by his parents so he could have friends over. hendery sat beside you on the couch. you leaned on his shoulder while the rest of them started the smoke session. ten turns on the tv and asks if you want to play mario kart, to which you agree. he starts it up and gives you a controller. you both play for a while when hendery asks you to come with him. the boys pay you guys no mind as you leave the basement and go upstairs. hendery takes you to what looks like a spare bedroom and sits on the bed. you awkwardly stand in the doorway. “sit down, i wanna show you something.” you sit next to him on the bed. his fingers gently brush your chin and turn your head towards him. he flicks his eyes from your lips to your eyes before locking his lips with yours. the kiss startles you but he keeps on. you eventually melt into it, wrapping your arms around his neck to bring him closer. the kiss starts getting heated, and he starts to slip your shirt off you. you both took turns taking an article of clothing off until you're just in underwear. his slender fingers slip your panties off and he steps out of his boxers. 

 “wait, do we have a condom?”

 “uhh, no” you bite your lip in hesitation. “I can pull out, don’t worry about it.” you still hesitate, but give him a nod. hendery comes up to kiss at your neck as he slides in. you wince at the sting, but the pleasure takes over soon after. he sets his pace fast and hard. the bed shakes with every thrust and your moans fill his ears. you feel hendery deep inside you, his tip hits your cervix every thrust. “ah, hendery please more” your whines are like honey to him. hendery speeds up and you writhe in pleasure. the force of him pounding into you is enough to make you see white. your orgasm washes over you as hendery grunts at you clenching around him. He slides in and out of you a few more times before he reaches his high. he stills inside you to catch his breath. the only sounds in the room are both of your heavy breathing. he slides out of you and you wince at the loss of being filled. “hendery, you said you’d pull out.”

 “shit, my bad. do you need me to take you to get an after pill?” you get up and gather your clothes, putting them on.

 “yes, i can’t take the chance.” he gets dressed before leaving the room with you and letting the boys know that you're both going to the store. 

 “you guys want anything?” the boy all scream different answers, all varying snacks. hendery rolls his eyes before grumbling about spending his money. he takes you to ten’s car and you head to the nearest store. the drive there was quiet and left you wondering if hendery actually liked you or wanted to have sex with you. you went in and grabbed what you needed while he looked for the boys’ snacks. he paid for it and you guys got back in the car. “i actually really like you, y/n. i hope you don’t think i only wanted to fuck you.” he glances at you. you nod and smile at him. the rest of the ride is silent. when you walk in the house, you can hear the rest of the boys in the basement. hendery tosses the bag of snacks to them and joins you on a separate couch. you fall asleep on his shoulder with the boys’ yelling in the background.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

you continued to hang out with the boys since that day. you and hendery started dating. almost everyday after school you would go over to one of their houses to smoke and hang out. your parents noticed that you weren’t coming home until late in the night and asked you about it. “i hang out with hendery and our friends.” your parents exchange a look.

 “who is hendery? and who are your friends?” you roll your eyes.

 “hendery is my boyfriend. and our friends are kun, sicheng, yukhei, xiaojun, ten, and yangyang.”

 “so your hanging out with a bunch of boys?”

 “i mean, yea but their girlfriends come too.” your parents give another look before sighing and letting it go. they tell you to just watch the time from now on. you agree and head to hendery’s house. it was going to be just the two of you tonight. on the way to his house, your mind is distracted by thoughts of him. he was so sweet to you but sometimes, his smoking habit got in the way your relationship. he had blown off a couple of dates in favor of staying with the boys to smoke. you never said anything, because you smoked just as much as they did now, but it left you feeling as if you weren’t enough. his driveway comes into your view, and you pull up. you get out and walk up to the door and knock. he opens it and greets you with a soft kiss. you set your shoes by the door and sit on the couch. 

 “are we watching a movie?” he smiles and nods.

 “do you have one in mind baby?” you take the remote from him and choose a movie. you both get comfortable on the couch. you’re immersed in the movie, but hendery apparently has other plans. his hands rub your legs getting higher everytime. you only take small notice until his fingers start toying with your waistband. “Hendery, are you really horny right now? this movie is about murder.” you laugh at his eagerness. he pouts but continues is actions. you reposition yourself so he can better access inbetween your legs. his fingers make their way into your underwear. the pads of his fingers are rough, and they feel like heaven on your clit. you sigh in delight at the feeling. you grind your hips back into him, feeling his boner. he slips two fingers into you and you moan out at the feeling. you move to the rhythm of his fingers and you feel your climax approaching. he pulls his hand away and lifts your shirt over your head. you slide your pants off and he gets rid of his clothes. you go to lay on your back but he stops you.

 “no, i wanna try the position we were laying in.” he sits down lengthways and you get on his lap facing away. hendery gives you no warning before shoving himself in you. you grip the back of the couch to steady yourself.

 “fuck, hendery” your voice barely comes out. he keeps going deeper inside you before he bottoms out. he lets out a groan when you clench around him. he waits for you to move. you nod at him and he slides out halfway before pushing back into you. you squirm and beg for him to go faster. he scoffs, “be careful what you ask for, babygirl.” he pulls all the way out before thrusting back into you with force. he reaches around and rubs circles into your clit while pounding into you. your soft mewls fill the air in the room. your orgasm was creeping up on you, the built tension from earlier as a jumpstart. hendery somehow speeds up both his thrusts and hand. your orgasm washes over you like a wave. soft “fucks” and murmers of hendery spill from your mouth. he keeps thrusting into you, the overstimulation making you clench hard. His release follows shortly after, his seed spilling in you. you fall limp against him to catch your breath. he wriggles out from under you and heads upstairs. you call after him but he doesn’t answer. you sigh and put your clothes back on before going to find him. he was in the shower when you got upstairs. you knock on his bathroom door. he grunts in response. 

 “did i do something wrong? i don’t understand why you’re acting like this.” you walk into the bathroom and slip out of your clothes before joining him in the shower. he ignores your presence. “hendery, please tell me if i did something-” “can you shut up?” he startles you, his voice loud.

 “what is the attitude about?” he scoffs before getting out and leaving you under the water.

 “you always have to be up my ass, that’s what. i rarely spend time with the boys anymore, you always have to tag along.” now it’s your turn to scoff at him. 

 “oh, so you’re just going to forget the two dates you blew off to go smoke with them? what about then, hendery?”

 “that isn’t even that deep. quit being a baby, y/n.” tears brim your eyes and you mumble for him to get out, to which he does. when you’re done, you stay in the bathroom for a while to calm down. fights like that had become more and more frequent between the two of you. just last week, he yelled at you infront of the others about something you couldn’t even control. someone had been flirting with you and you didn’t realize before hendery had. it really hurt your feelings and he never apoligized for it. when you step out of the bathroom, hendery is sitting on the bed smoking. you walk over to the bed and sit beside him.

 “i’m sorry for calling you a baby.” he passes you the blunt and you take it between your lips. you take a couple hits before speaking to him.

 “i think you need to lay off on the smoking, hendery. it makes you an asshole, but i still accept your apology. i’m sorry for all the times i’ve yelled at you.” he sighs.

 “y/n, im not gonna stop smoking just because you think it makes me an asshole.” you shoot him an incredulous look.

 “are you serious? because i think? no hendery, i know it makes you an asshole. you can ask anyone from our group and they’ll agree.” he rolls his eyes and finishes off the blunt before muttering about how you should get home. you scoff and storm out of his house.

the next morning, you wake up to 6 missed calls from kun and multiple texts and calls from hendery. you decide to call kun first. he picks up within the first ring.

 “y/n, can you please tell hendery that your not mad at him?”

 “i am, though.”

 “why? can you guys at least make up or something, he won’t stop calling me.” you sigh and tell him you’ll call but no promises. you press hendery’s contact and wait for him to pick up.

 “y/n, i’m sorry. i know you’re mad at me but i want to apoligize. i know i can be an asshole but i’m sorry.” you take a moment to process his quick speaking.

 “hendery, no matter how much of an asshole you are, i’m still your girlfriend and i love you, so i forgive you.” 

 “thank god, i’ll try to be better. do you want to come over?” hendery’s lack of ‘i love you too’ took you off guard. maybe he didn't hear you.

 “yea, that would be nice. are the boys going to be there?”

 “yeah, they were whining about how they missed you.” you giggle and tell him you’ll be over there soon before hanging up. you get dressed before heading to hendery’s house. when you get there, you don’t even knock on the door. you know the boys are downstairs already, so you head down there. ten and kun were smoking in a corner, yangyang, hendery, and xiaojun were playing video games, and sicheng was playing on his phone. you decided to sit beside him.

 “hey, y/n. we missed you.” sicheng gives you a side hug, squeezing you until you had to punch his arm. he snickered as he let go of you. “you guys made up i’m assuming?”

 “yea, like we always do.” you sigh at the fact that you and hendery fight so much it’s normal. he was almost always high when they would happen. your mental strength was drained from always dealing with it. so you took to smoking even more than usual to numb the pain. at first it was fine, but now you relied on it. you couldn’t sleep, or even get hungry without being high. your grades were shitty now, too. trying to hide that from your parents backfired. at first they were mad at you, but somehow it turned into a fight between them, and that caused you to get stressed even more. all the things were building up and having the pot seemed to help only a little. you were spiraling down a hole to no return. hendery didn’t even seem to notice, only sicheng did. he was always there for you when you were ignoring hendery. the past four months had turned you into someone else. if you asked your past self what they would be doing now, it would not be close to this. hendery had a tight hold on your mind, and you couldn’t force him to let go. everytime you planned to break up with him, you changed your mind. it was an endless cycle. screaming and crying in the night couldn’t help you. your parents sending you to therapy couldn’t help you. the drugs and alcohol couldn’t help you. the only thing that could help you was the very thing that hurt you. hendery. he always fixes the problems he causes.

 “like we always do.”

[darkshadow90]

Arthur Fleck x reader one shot: He’s got you on His Mind

Summary: You are a college student living in Gotham. You also happen to be one of Arthur Fleck’s neighbors. You pass each other on your way to classes, but you don’t talk to each other much. Arthur becomes infatuated with you, and thinks you’re in a relationship with him. Things escalate from there.

A/N: Hey, guys. This is a one shot I’m writing for an anon. They requested a one shot in which Arthur and the reader are neighbors. She’s in her early 20′s. Arthur becomes infatuated with her, and thinks they’re in a relationship. He’s more sexually experienced than the reader. This is my first time writing NSFW/smut in a story, so I’m not sure how good it will be. Please be kind with your feedback. I wasn’t sure what to include for the smut, so I decided to go with oral sex (female receiving). I thought it might be a little easier for me to write about since it’s my first time writing mature content. I didn’t want to write a full sex scene (like Arthur going all the way with reader) because I was afraid I would butcher it and it would be awful 😅 Now for the warnings: Arthur will be creepy in this. There will be stalking, unhealthy boundaries, kidnapping. Arthur will misinterpret things the reader says because of his delusions about her. This is in no way meant to represent a healthy relationship. Arthur and the reader don’t know each other very well at all. And because of that, this will be delving into major dub con territory. I can’t really imagine someone who barely knows Arthur being completely okay with doing intimate things with him. Especially when he’s imagined them being together and is delusional. Arthur doesn’t understand healthy boundaries. As I’ve mentioned before, while I have written quite a few Arthur x reader fluff pieces, I also tend to write Arthur darker than some of you would like, or are used to. Please remember that fiction isn’t reality. It’s only a story. Stay safe, everyone. That being said, I know some of you want to see more of a darker take on Arthur, and I’m so thrilled to have your support. Please do let me know if I’ve missed any trigger warnings. Anon, I hope in spite of how dark this is, it’s close to what you wanted. I hope all of you enjoy this 🙂

You hadn’t been living in Gotham long. You couldn’t afford to move to a nicer city, so you ended up going to college in the filthy city. You were hopeful that once you finished your degree,  you would be able to get a job in a better city.  On this particular morning, you were running late for class. You were running toward the elevator when you bumped  into someone. “Oh, I’m sorry!” You were expecting the person to scream at you to watch where you’re going, but when you looked up, the man in front of you didn’t say anything. He just stared at you. It was like he was in a trance. Feeling uncomfortable, you looked down. You noticed there was a card on the floor. He must’ve dropped it when you bumped into him. “Looks like you dropped this.” He didn’t say anything. It made you more uncomfortable. “I’m sorry for running into you like that. I’m late.” “Arthur.”  “What?” “That’s my name.” “I’m Y/N. Sorry I don’t really have time to talk. Bye!” Arthur watched you as you ran to the elevator.

Arthur was completely infatuated with you. You were one of the only people who didn’t yell at him or go out of your way to be mean to him. Almost everyone in Gotham  was rude to him. But you weren’t. He was happy to have someone besides Gary treat him with kindness.  He wanted to know more about you. He followed you everywhere. He picked up in all your habits, your likes and dislikes. Sometimes he watched you from your window at night.  He knew your full routine. You fell asleep with the TV on a lot. There were times you began to feel very creeped out. You had an odd feeling that you were being followed. You called out for the person to show themselves, but no one ever came out of the shadows. There was one night you could’ve sworn you saw someone or something  standing over your bed, but you weren’t fully awake. By the time you had fully woken up, whatever or whoever you thought you saw was gone. You could never shake the feeling someone was always watching you, and following you wherever you went. It made you feel on edge. You saw Arthur again. He seemed a lot more confident, and bold. He seemed a little strange, but he wasn’t dangerous...at least you didn’t think he was. You thought you could open up to him about how you’ve been feeling. “Don’t worry about it, Y/N. Whoever it is that’s been following you wouldn’t hurt you. They’re looking out for you.” “How can you be sure?” “If they wanted to hurt you, they would’ve hurt you already.” “I guess you’re right. Maybe they’re my guardian angel. I should get going. I have a busy day tomorrow. Goodnight, Arthur.” You went inside your apartment and closed the door.

Arthur fell in love with you. He needed to follow you and get to know you better so he could make you fall in love with him.  He spent the last few weeks following you, learning about your routine. He even managed to sneak into your apartment and watch you sleep. He made sure to leave before you woke up. He loved everything about you.  Randall and the guys  had paid prostitutes to  go on a “date”  with him. The women were nice to him. They were nice enough to show him how to please a woman. It was nice, but Arthur knew it wasn’t the same as a real relationship. It was more for the guys’ amusement than his, but he was glad he had the knowledge and experience he needed to make you feel good  when the time came. He knew it would be different with you.  In his mind the two of you had gone on several dates. You laughed at his  jokes. “You’re so funny, Arthur. And you’re so handsome. I’m so happy you’re always there for me when I need you. I know everything you’ve done has been for me. I’m one of the luckiest girls in the world to have you in my life. I love you.” One night, he imagined you touching him. Your  hand was so smooth and gentle as it continued to caress his manhood. Your praises and words of encouragement made him come. He snapped back into reality and washed the semen from his hand. He felt guilty. He felt shame for thinking of you that way, doing all those dirty things to him. But he knew it wasn’t wrong or shameful because he loved you. And you loved him, in his mind. You had touched the most intimate part of him, and he wanted to return the favor. When he saw you in the hallway, he was so happy when you told him the person following you is your guardian angel. He realized then that he had succeeded in making you fall in love with him. You viewed him as your protector. Of course, it was in his mind. He misinterpreted your reaction. He didn’t realize you were being sarcastic. He needed to keep you safe. You were too good for a place like Gotham. So soft and sweet. On that night, he intended to give you what you deserved.

He waited until later into the night when you would be asleep before making his way inside the apartment. He went inside your bedroom and carefully went over to the bed. He lifted you from the bed and carried you to his apartment. You woke up in a bedroom that was unfamiliar to you. It looked like it was a woman’s bedroom. You were trying your best to not panic. Someone was next to you asleep in the bed. It was Arthur. ‘What the fuck? What am I doing here? Why did he put me in his bed? I knew something was wrong with him. I need to get out of here before he wakes up.’ You got up and carefully began to make your way off the bed. Before you could stand up and get to the door, Arthur grabbed your arm. ‘Shit!’ “Where are you going, Y/N?” ‘Fuck, what do I do?’ “I...Arthur, why am I in your apartment, in your bedroom?” “I brought you here. You’ve been here before, Y/N. We’ve been dating, you know that. One night, you...you touched me. I know you feel the same way I feel about you since you told me I was meant to watch over you.” That’s when you realized Arthur was the person stalking you. ‘He thinks we’re in love with each other? Holy shit, he really is out of his mind!’ He gently pushed you back on the bed and kissed you passionately. 

When you finally caught your breath, you jerked away. “Arthur, what are you doing?” “I want to return the favor.” The was a side of Arthur you had never seen before. He wasn’t shy. He was confident. The kiss he had given you was demanding. It wasn’t anything you would’ve thought you would see from him. You froze and didn’t know what to say. You had limited sexual experience and you sure as hell didn’t want to do something intimate with a man you barely knew. As he began to make his way down your body, you tried to move away, but you were pinned under him. “Arthur, stop.” Stop? Surely you didn’t want him to stop. You liked being with him before. Your body began to react and you felt yourself becoming aroused. “Wait.” He didn’t understand why you were trying to stop him. He suspected you hadn’t had many sexual experiences. He thought he just needed to calm you down so you would feel more at ease. You weren’t sure what to think anymore. Under normal circumstances, you would’ve been fighting tooth and nail, but Arthur hadn’t hurt you. He wasn’t looking at you like he wanted to hurt you. His eyes were full of love and adoration for you. Part of you didn’t want him to stop. You felt him remove your underwear. “Arthur!” “Shhh, Y/N, it’s okay. Trust me. I promise you’ll like this.” You decided to trust him, but you felt vulnerable knowing he was about to be between your legs. You looked away and closed your eyes. His first lap was gentle. He started from the bottom and licked all the way to the top of your folds, stopping at the bundle of nerves hiding there. You gasped at the sensation, and he kept doing it a few more times until he was sure both of you were more comfortable. You still kept your eyes closed. He parted your folds and his tongue delved deeper into your wet hole. It was soft, wet and warm against you, and felt so good, you almost pulled away from the intensity. You felt heat building up in the pit of your stomach. When he barely grazed your sensitive nub, you bucked your hips, and he pulled away. He wasn’t done yet. He used one of his hands to keep you in place. He latched his mouth onto your nub, sucking on it, and circling it with with his tongue. The coil in your stomach was getting tighter, and the heat was becoming more intense. You were trying your best not to cry out. You didn’t want anyone to hear you. Arthur inserted a finger inside of you and began to curl it. The movement of his finger combined with his mouth and tongue finally sent you over the edge as you let out a stifled moan. You opened your eyes and saw Arthur wipe your juices from his mouth. “See? I told you you would like it.” You did like it. But even though you wanted what he did, you knew a relationship with him would be far from healthy. You needed to figure a way out of there, but you knew it wouldn’t be easy. You learned something about Arthur. He was a very determined man, and he was determined to keep you in his life.

@theplaguetoendallplagues  @dont-be-alarmed @germansarechill

[sarkywoman]

Writing Asks

Tagged by @under-the-shady-tree, thanks!

20 questions, writer’s edition, let’s go!!

How many works do you have on AO3? 85

What’s your total AO3 word count? 712708

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they? Oof, uh... since like, 1999? Um, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Andromeda, Supernatural, Heroes, NCIS, DC, Marvel, The Umbrella Academy, Kingsmen, ASoIaF/Game of Thrones, Borderlands, Community, Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency, Doctor Who/Torchwood, Final Fantasy, Harry Potter, Misfits, I think I’ve forgotten some...

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Noble Blood (Game of Thrones, ASoIaF - GRRM)  A Song of Bastards and Wards (ASoIaF - GRRM, Game of Thrones)  Young God (Borderlands)  Story and Sorcery (Loki: Agent of Asgard, Marvel)  My Shame is True (The Umbrella Academy (TV))

Do you respond to comments, why or why not? I try to! Comments are so important in the fanfic community and I know how hard it is to think of something to say about a story, even when you’ve loved it to bits, so I don’t want people to feel ignored. Especially because I appreciate comments so, so much! I will say though, I have lapses, often when my mental health isn’t good, where I simply don’t know how to respond to people and then months go by and I feel weird about replying... so sorry if you’ve ever commented on one of my stories and got silence - it was me not you!

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? The Aimless One (Misfits (TV 2009)) Straight up the saddest story I’ve written, no question. Normally writing sad stuff doesn’t make me sad but I had to take a break in the middle of this to just try and grapple with the idea I’d had because it tapped into a lot of depressing thoughts I have about life and death in general. The comments were all complimentary but so upset that at first I was like ‘hooray, it had the desired impact’, then after a while I started to think ‘why did I want to hurt people like this?’

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending? Probably  Realising All You Ever Wanted, a Hobbs/Dirk fic for the Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency fandom. There’s such minor conflict in that one that the sugary sweet ending isn’t out of place. 

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written? Well. I have some fandoms that are sort of crossovers already, things like Marvel where you have comic versions and movie versions and it doesn’t really feel like a crossover to be picking and choosing. Same with a Dirk Gently/Thor fic I did, because Thor cameos in the DG canon, but not this Thor. I think the most ambitious crossover I’ve worked on was a collaborative chatfic with @freshgratednutmeg that we’re never likely to post, where the need for more background characters in an Umbrella Academy A/o fic led to it being crossed over with Marvel and Brooklyn 99. (Leading to such amusements as Diego sparring with Rosa, and Five competing with Shuri in class.)

Have you ever received hate on a fic? Yeah, but it’s never been very well-reasoned so it’s been fairly easy to dismiss. Some people expect everyone to share their own perspective of the characters and it’s weird.

Do you write smut? If so what kind? Not really. I can go there and have done on occasion, but it doesn’t interest me very much. I think I did it more when I was younger because I felt like it was a necessary aspect of grown-up fanfic writing (when I started I was a teenager amongst mostly adults... or other people lying about their age too lol). These days I’m more likely to fade to black or allude to the acts. But I’m not averse to writing it or anything, but it’s never the focus of my story.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Only in the sense that I see them on other sites I didn’t upload to, sometimes in other languages, sometimes not. They normally say my name somewhere on them so they’re not stolen as such, but it’s still uncomfortable to see my work circulated to other sites without my permission.

Have you ever had a fic translated? Not with my permission, but yeah. I don’t know how to feel about translations. Obviously I want people of other languages to be able to read my work, but at the same time I’m not fluent enough to be able to check the translator’s work, so I won’t know if they’ve done any better than google. Word choice is pretty important in fiction. A bad translation can totally warp a text.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Not for posting or sharing, but me and @freshgratednutmeg cowrite all the time.

What’s your all time favorite ship? All time?! That’s impossible to answer. I’m a multi-shipper for starters, in pretty much every fandom I’ve been in. When I find a ship I love, I love it intensely above all others for the duration of the fixation. Then eventually it gets set aside when I find a new fandom. I’m also indecisive enough to not really have an all-time favourite anything. 

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? A Song of Bastards and Wards (ASoIaF - GRRM, Game of Thrones). I can’t begin to describe the pages of notes I have for this beast. Unless I threw them out, which... scanning my room... is a distinct possibility. Ouch. I’d hoped to parallel the books for a long time with this one, but the amount of work for a project like that is too much when you’re no longer as passionate about the source fandom. I suspect what I might do is scenes with interconnecting notes, just so people get some sense of closure.

What are your writing strengths? Dialogue, baybee! Kinda makes me want to be a scriptwriter. People are always telling me that the characters ‘sound like’ them. I think it’s from reading voraciously from when I was young and being quite a social child, that moving speech patterns and quirks into writing is something that comes very naturally to me. Too natural, in fact, because IRL I write how I speak and that’s not always suited to the situation.

What are your writing weaknesses? Most things other than dialogue. Even thought processes are an internal dialogue, so they’re okay, but then like... a fight scene? A sex scene? Just even... what are their hands doing while they’re talking? How are these people physically present? Where are they? Are they inside, outside, is the building on fire? My descriptive skills are lacking, to say the least. It’s something I’m working on.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? I’m not quite sure what’s meant by this. I’m not fluent in anything other than English so I don’t see that would work well for me. I know a few phrases in German/French/Welsh/Latin/Spanish but nothing useful for conversation. Dropping in words can work, if it’s the same way the speaker would use them amidst their English. Most of the time the characters I’m writing wouldn’t be speaking in another language anyway. We can blame the tag-team of English colonialism and American media for that one I think. I think that sometimes authors utilise a character’s language in a way that just exposes how little the author actually knows of the language and that’s a bit cringe for me.

What was the first fandom you wrote for? Buffy the Vampire Slayer. None of those are online atm because they’re so so bad XD I should post them just so people can see improvement but... I can’t even read them, they’re hilarious. The most gratuitous self-inserts, the most ludicrous arguments, the most out-of-character romantic declarations.

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written? Hmm, that’s a quandary. I think I’ll differentiate between favourite to write, and favourite end product. Favourite to write was probably  Noble Blood (Game of Thrones, ASoIaF - GRRM) because it was just a romp through my favourite themes. Given it’s one of my most popular stories, I’d say that just proves you should write what you want! I was going to quickly say  Young God (Borderlands) is my favourite fic for quality of the finished product, because I pretty much just sat down one evening and spilled it into a word doc then reread it back and thought ‘huh, did I write that? Awesome’. But I’m happy with a couple of more recent things I’ve done for The Umbrella Academy fandom, notably  The Price of Parenthood, which is very different to what I usually write and is a look at the life of one of the mothers who gave up her child to Reginald. Also The Water Calls, which was the only thing I managed to write for the recent MerMay event. It took me a little while to puzzle out how it all fit together, then once I had it worked out it came together wonderfully and I was very happy with the tone of it. 

Tagging anyone who fancies doing it.

[honeytama]

Earned It

Spinner (Shuichi Iguchi) X Fem!Villian!Reader

A/N: An AU fic where the LoV has a safe, mansion-like hideout where they can chill and watch movies! It’s the best! Also, I couldn’t decide whether to stick with the “Spinner has two cocks” hc or not, but I ended up writing how I felt. If it makes you feel uncomfortable, I’m truly sorry in advance <3 I’m still learning. Enjoy!

Summary: Spinner and yourself get left alone in the hideout for a day. After watching him work out vigorously, you end up realizing how much you want to help him relax his body in the best way possible.

Warnings: Smut (18+), cussing, thigh riding, unofficial friends-with-benefits, praise kink, body worship kink, and two dicks hc 

Word Count: 5.1k

The wood floor sends chills up your legs as you move down the stair steps of the quiet mansion. It’s early in the morning, and you knew not one of your friends would voluntarily choose to be awake yet. Through the large living room windows, you could finally see the sun come up over the horizon. 

Walking into the kitchen, you spot a piece of paper placed on the bar counter. “Be back tomorrow night,” it reads. There’s a heart scrawled in red pen next to the words. Probably from Toga wanting to be in on the message.

“Ohh, I guess they’re up…,” you yawn. The house starts to feel even more empty than before. All of your friends have gone to do criminal activities together. However, it feels nice to know that you don't have to make breakfast for Shigaraki this morning. Dude never knows what he wants to eat.

You decide to make a serving of eggs for yourself, and you toss a couple of pieces of bread into the toaster as the stove heats up the pan. While cooking the eggs, your head pops up at the sound of floor boards moving above you. Then, you hear a light clacking on the hardwood. It’s moving closer to the stairs behind you. The noise sends goosebumps up to your neck as you turn off the stove burner and quickly arm yourself with a kitchen knife. You move your legs at the same pace as the person coming down the stairs; the knife held above your head being gripped tightly by your fists. You hold your breath as they take one more step down towards you. And without thinking, your body lunges forward to assault the intruder.

“Ahhh!!” You yell out. Spinner thrusts his hand out to grab your forearm as the sharp blade comes towards his face at a surprising speed. The movement and strength of his entire body cause you to fumble backward until your back is against the stair wall. With his hand on your forearm still, he squeezes hard until your armed hand involuntarily drops the knife to the ground. You’re stuck, pressed against the wall, while Spinner holds your arms above your head. 

“Shuichi, fuck—” You gasp. Both of your chests rising and falling quickly against one another.

Shuichi’s eyes widen at the sight of your eyebrows knitted together, mouth in an ‘o’ shape. “Oh my, shit, I’m so sorry,” he blushes. He lets go of your arms like they had been burning the scales off his palms. “Just what the hell were you trying to do?” He asks squatting down to pick up the knife from the floor. There’s an indent in the wood where the blade came in contact with it. With the knife now in his hand, it starts to swing around your face as he lectures you about proper knife holding technique. Your mind feels fuzzy as you try to focus back on Spinner’s voice. Rubbing the pain away from your arm, your cheeks heat up at the thought of his unusual handling of you. These thoughts are interrupted when he starts to walk away to the kitchen. “From now on, please leave the knife handling to me… or Toga. Really,” he says back at you.

“I’m fine, I think,” you mutter, “Geez, I really thought you were someone else. The others are away until tomorrow.” Following him back to the kitchen, you walk to the stove to put your fried eggs on a plate. Embarrassed, you attempt to change the conversation. “Could you hang with me today?” You blurt out. “I mean, you probably have plans, but the TV has streaming services that I’ve always wanted to try. Maybe, we could choose something together later?” You ask.

His head whips around from grabbing your pieces of toast, and walks to put them on your place with a giant smile. “Oh, uh, yeah sure! Sounds fun!” He bellows. “I plan to train out in the backyard for a bit today. So, once I’m done I’ll let you know. We can make popcorn and everything.”

—-

An hour passed since you and Spinner had eaten breakfast together. He’s currently coming back down the stairs from changing out of his pajamas. You watch him walk to the back door in a gray short sleeve, black running shorts, and an old pair of Shigaraki’s red sneakers. It warmed your heart to see him so comfortable. The League finally had some luck in finding a nice, secluded hideout even though money was still tight. You couldn’t wait to relax with your friend later on the couch to explore a world neither had ever experienced. Shigaraki’s Netflix account.

You grab the remote to log in to the profile named, “Tomura.” Pressing the down button repeatedly, you scroll down through the numerous genre pages with tons of movies and TV shows lined up for you and your friends to indulge in. It excites you to have new things to enjoy. It could possibly take the edge off of everyone living in the house. You save your most favorite movie choices in a List; they’re all titles you had seen on billboards and posters in the city as you travelled as fugitives.

Done with sitting with the excitement alone, you get up from the living room couch to walk across the house to the backyard. The sun was fully out and warming your cheeks as you approached the large arched window facing the green lawn. You had planned to leave the house to meet Shuichi out in the grass, but what you saw was enough to stop you in your tracks.

Spinner duel wields swords, one in each hand. You've always admired his assertion and confidence while fighting, even though you didn’t get too much of it off of the battlefield. You hoped he hadn’t caught you approaching the window as you continue to watch him swing and jab at the air. Your eyes were attached to his concentrated expression and the clanking sounds of his sword coming together as he crosses his arms. He looks so dangerous from afar. This made you laugh internally as it was starkly different than the way he actually made you feel. You flashback to earlier that morning when Shuichi had subdued you in a matter of seconds. It sent a shiver down your spine then, and now, as you eye your friend across the yard. This reflection makes you want to treat him in some other way. Though, you didn’t know how.

You get pulled out of your thoughts as your eyes spot a gleam of light swaying back and forth. You focus back on your friend again, and realize he is waving a sword at you with a smirk on his face. You blush hard and decide to wave back. It’s too late to try to hide.

“How long have you been standing there, huh?“ His voice becomes less and less muffled as he jogs through the yard to the glass between you two. 

“I-I just wanted to tell you about the movies I found,” you say loudly while putting your hand to your heated cheek. His smug reaction surprised you. He probably still had some courageous energy from just coming off of his workout. You start to laugh nervously as he pushes open the door with one hand — both blade handles being held in his other. “You looked like you were in your element,” you smiled widely and a blush still grazes your nose.

“Aw, oh, haha thanks! Even though we’re safe right now in the place,” he pauses to look up at the high ceiling and back out at the clean lawn, “I need to keep up with training. And maybe you should too, huh, bud? I was able to pin you so easily earlier, haha! You usually don’t give in so quickly.” I just want you to be safe in case someone actually dares to mess with you for real… Even though I wouldn’t want to leave her side, anyway. What am I thinking? Stop it, Shuichi, dammit. He clears his throat, “I’m gonna go shower and change. Once I come back down, I'm all yours!” He steps out of his shoes to carry them to the mudroom, along with both of his swords. You leave your place by the window to go to the kitchen to microwave popcorn and grab a soda for the two of you while Spinner runs up the stairs to get ready.

—-

“Let’s go! I’m so ready, Y/N!” You look up from your phone to hear your friend bounding down the stairs. He’s back in the living room wearing his usual comfort outfit. A gray sweatshirt and jeans… and of course, a Stain mask across his eyes. He hops over the couch back to get comfortable next to you. You already have your favorite fluffy blanket laying on your lap; your toes peeking through at the end of it as your legs are propped up on the coffee table. Spinner laughs and blushes when he sees you kicking your feet in excitement as you smile up at him.

“Ok, so I chose Avengers, I hope that’s alright? We’ve never seen it before, so I figured—,” you gauge his reaction before handing him the remote to let him explore the way you did.

He takes the remote and presses play. “Hell yeah, an action movie, huh. This one’s about those fictional hero guys, right? I’m excited to see what the villains are like.” He tilts his head to the side.

As you settled deeper into the couch, you felt a tug at the blanket on your lap. Spinner was pulling it slowly into his own, moving in a bit closer next to your side as he did so. The surprising act gave you a lump in your throat, you grabbed some popcorn from the bowl to push the feeling away.

As you watch the movie with Spinner, you couldn’t help but catch glances at him next to you. His eyes were held at attention on the screen, so you took the chance to watch his happiness like earlier. His muscular arm next to you brushed against yours a couple times when he tensed at a suspenseful scene; the sudden movements caused you to wait in anticipation to see if he would finally make a move. He bounced the leg touching your own as he waited for new characters to make their entrances. All of these movements, including the grunts that fell from his lips during training, had stirred up your insides for far too long. You really need some relief.

Deciding to take a chance with your feelings, you lift your hand from your side and place it on top of his shaking thigh. Spinner immediately stops bouncing his leg. The stimulation of it rubbing against your own was gone; only the slight numbness of your exposed leg remained. You move forward with your choice as he didn’t complain from your touch. You start to rub small circles into his jeans with your thumb, testing the waters even more now. 

Shuichi slowly looks down at the blanket covering his thigh to imagine the placement of your own hand on him. Touching him. His breath hitches in his throat as you begin the drag your hand upwards towards his inner thigh, and then back down. Closing his eyes, he puts his arm around your shoulder and pulls you in tighter. He hopes you were doing this on purpose— your hand teasing him to the greatest degree… hoping to get close enough to press your palm into the space between his legs. Oh, shit. 

While trying to regulate your breathing, you squeezed the inside of Spinner's thigh lightly. Even this touch gets him to throw his head back and gasp. You finally get brave enough to look up, and you see him squirming from your touch. You lock eyes for a second before he turns away, blushing.

“Oh, god, uh Y/N, I’m so sorry! You probably didn’t mean for it to feel like that… I mean, for it to mean that, huh?” He apologizes repeatedly and removes his arm from your shoulder to cover his face with both his palms. Still, your hand is holding onto his thigh, now a calming gesture.

“Spinner, no no, I should be apologizing, I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable. I did mean it that way, but I’ll stop,” you admit as you pull your hand away. “Are you still fine to watch the movie—“

Removing his hands from his pink face, he locks eyes with you again. “We can leave the movie on,” Shuichi breathes in deeply before reaching across your shoulders again and stopping to put his scaled hand on the back of your neck. “I wanted it to mean it in that way, Y/N. So, don’t— don’t stop! Ok?” He let his toothy smile return to his face this time. You shyly smile back and lean into him with your hand on his cheek. Both of your faces meet when the tip of his snout taps your nose for confirmation.

“Please, just kiss me already,” you whisper.

Without a second passing, the hand on your neck is pulling you into him as your lips lock onto his. Spinner opens his eyes mid-kiss, daring himself to accept that you're doing this with him. The hand on his cheek moves quickly towards his chest. Pushing Spinner backward to the sofa pillows, you lift your legs to straddle his lap. The blanket is already forgotten on the ground as your lips continue to move together. Damn, he was so good at this, but you still could feel the tightness in his chest. It was time to take the lead to treat him to something he deserved.

“Mhm,” he groans in response to your quick actions. Your arms are thrown around his neck now as you sit in his lap. It felt as if you were floating, yet you try your hardest to stay in the moment with him. You could already feel the heat transferring back and forth from your attached bodies. His thighs supporting your ass, the nape of his neck giving post to the wandering hands in his hair. Spinner allows himself to slouch a bit into the cushion, hoping to bring your center into his bulge. You took this as permission to pull away from his lips and wiggle your hips to ease the tension.

“You look so good, Shuichi,” you set your hands on his shoulders, kneading into them. This earns a deep groan from his throat. He was probably sore from working his body earlier. You continue to knead and press into him as you move your lips to his neck. “Let me please you. I want to show,” you kiss him once, “just how appreciative I am of you.” You open your mouth to kiss his neck again, and again until his hands have found your hips to pull you down onto his hard-on. You nip his neck at the sudden pressure on your core. “You deserve this, Shuichi. Will you be good for me?” You say before sucking his neck as you grind into him. “Indulge me?” All the while he’s whimpering and nodding to the rhythm of your words and moves. You leave his lap and settle yourself to a kneeling position on the floor. The sweetheart pulls a pillow from behind him and hands it to you.

“Use this if you’re gonna do that, sweetie,” he breathes out. You innocently look up at him, even though the new pet name makes your knees weak. You want to jump his bones already.

You get comfortable on the pillow and help spread his knees apart so that you can get closer. With your hands on his knees, you push your palms up towards his bulge, finally. You lift the bottom of his sweatshirt to get to his pant’s button and fly. Taking your time, you look into his eyes as you pull the zipper down. You could already see the top of his boxer briefs — which does little to hide how excited he was for this. Spinner helps you pull his jeans and briefs off the rest of the way, eagerly throwing them to the side as you’re left kneeling in front of him to ogle. He then sits back to wait for your next move. 

“I like being on the same page as my partner.” You say before lifting your shift over your head and throwing it to his clothing pile. It was a day off for Spinner and you both, so wearing anything restricting underneath your shirt wasn’t an option. You watch his eyes fall to your chest. A sight he’s always dreamt of, but hasn’t gotten to experience until now. You could tell he wasn’t disappointed at looking at your body in front of him due to his cocks twitching and already beading precum. The view motivates you to lean into him to grab one in each hand. Both of your fists side by side, you bite your lip as you begin pumping each one slowly. 

“You're not, ohh damn, scared, huh?” He moans out.

“Of you?” You continue to pump him idly as you speak. “Almost never. You make us all feel so safe. But..,.” you pause to give each dick small licks to their leaking tips. “You looked so dangerous out there using your blades earlier. I couldn’t help myself to tame you,” you tease.

“Oh!” He groans in pleasure as he tosses his head to rest on the cushion behind him. “Use your mouth some more… please.”

“Of course, handsome.” Obliging his request, you slowly dip your head onto one of his cocks, using your tongue to wet every inch that you could. The taste of his precum hit your pallet and is surprisingly sweet. The feeling of having your friend’s length invade your mouth is euphoric; it felt as if it wasn’t meant to happen but you both want it so bad. You knew the both of you would get an earful if ever your other comrades found out. Pushing away from the thought, you clench your eyelids to prepare to take Spinner in deeper.

You stop the movement of your left hand and focus on the muscles of your throat. Willing Shuichi to stay still as you work, you place a hand on his abs to press him into the cushion. You had never been able to feel the firmness of his body like this before. You bob your head easily on his cock, controlling your tongue as much as possible when coming up to his tip after each round. Feeling a hand on the crown of your head, you look up from under your lashes to watch Spinner’s face twist. His teeth clenched together tightly.

Pulling off of him with a soft popping noise, you shyly ask, “Shuichi, could you take your sweatshirt off for me?”

Spinner’s eyes widen at the request. He almost prefers to keep it on; to hide the rest of his body from your dark eyes. However, the look and attention you give him makes him feel wanted. “Yeah-ah, here,” he slowly pulls away the gray sweatshirt you had watched him tug on all throughout the movie. Which was long forgotten, by the way. Now, the only things left covering his skin are bandages running up his forearms and that mask.

“I love how hot your body is, Shuichi,” you move your hands to his abdomen, rubbing up and down his abs and then up towards his chest. The texture of his scales on your fingertips gave you goosebumps. Each groove teasing your center with possible pleasure. “I hope that after this… Maybe I’ll be able to see your body more often,” you move your hand back downwards to brush your thumb over his tip teasingly. His body flinches at the sudden alleviation. You smile up at him before getting up off your knees. Spinner takes your hand to help balance you, oblivious to your next maneuver.

Getting up off of the floor, you realize how the sexual tension from the past hour has affected your body. Slick slowly drips down the inside of your leg while your sleep shorts do almost nothing to stop it. While holding Spinner’s hand, you take his other so that they’re resting on your hips. “Take them off?”

Spinner gulps before slipping his two fingers with both hands into the hem of your shorts and underwear to pull them down carefully. His throat tightens as he catches his first glimpse at your panties, then after exposing the rest of you his mouth drops open slightly. Your garments are completely off now, pooled around your feet. 

You kick them away as you giggle at his unmoving expression. You pull him out of his blushing state as you push us shoulders back into the couch and straddle one of his large, scaled thighs. Your wet heat now rests directly on his skin. Spinner locks eyes with you in awe of your new position. Smiling, you reach down to grab one of his pulsating cocks which have been lacking attention throughout your undressing. You give one tug before starting to grind down into his thigh. 

“Oh, shit.” Your empty hand is gripping the back of Spinner’s neck to help balance you as you ride away. You pump him even quicker now to the rhythm of your hips thrusts. “Oohhh, dammit, Y/N, you look so hot, can I?” He holds a hand out to your chest, asking for permission. Biting your lip in pleasure, you nod greedily at his offer. While one of his hands grips your waist, the other makes haste to massage a bouncing breast. He ogles at the way your flesh feels in his hand. Spinner pinches and rolls your nipple over and over, taking note of the sweet noises falling from your lips. Removing his hand from your waist, he takes the other into his hand and moves his lips towards your chest. His tongue comes out, long and thick, to lick and press into your nipple. His groans of pleasure excite the numerous nerve endings he gives attention to. 

“Nnnph, Spinner! Shit, that f-feels so good, I might—,” the slick on your inner thigh now covering his own, your hips are able to move quickly across every groove on his muscular thigh. Both of you pant heavily and whine at the pleasures being exchanged. “But, I can’t, not y-yet, this is about you!” You attempt to lift off his thigh before his strong hands pull you right back down.

“No w-way are you stopping yourself from cumming on my account, Y/N. I-I want to see you c-cum for me.” Spinner words bring over the edge as he bounces the leg you're sitting upon. His words of encouragement bring your orgasm to a stronger level than anticipated. Yet, you reach to jerk off both of his dicks in tandem, your fingers barely able to wrap around the added circumference. 

“Yes, yes, yes, oh god thank you, Shuichi,” you moan out, falling from your high. You slow your grinding pace before pulling him into a heated kiss. You give all your energy to show him thanks by transferring into a passion. 

Suddenly, you feel yourself being lifted off of the couch onto your feet. Your legs are shaking voluntarily, so you put a hand on Spinner’s shoulder as he gets up from his spot on the couch. You’re facing each other in front of the sofa, both of you using your own hands to caress and explore each other’s bodies. “I can’t wait any longer, Y/N… I know you want to please me,” He comes in close to your ear to whisper, “but I really just want to fuck you into this couch myself, ok?”

You had originally planned to ride him into oblivion, but this option seems too good to pass up. “Ok,” you agree, biting your lip hard. His new tone makes you want to squeal. Spinner takes your forearm to lead you into position on the couch. You lay down across the sofa with your legs spread apart, unashamed to show off your wet folds that are reddened from rubbing against the ridges of his body. You watch as Shuichi kneels between your spread thighs, his chest heaving as his eyes dart to every part of your body. You bring your hands up again to trace the divots in his arms and abdomen, silently worshiping the body above you. He blushes at the attention and leans down to kiss you in earnest. You can feel both of his lubricious, hardened cocks prodding at your inner open thighs.

Spinner grabs your legs and presses them deeper into your chest and slowly guides one of his cocks to rub against your folds. “You’re a tease, Shuichi.” 

“Not as much as you, beautiful.” He slowly enters you, your body letting go of all of its restrictions. You mewl at the sight and feeling of your body being pushed to its limits. You had not prepared at all for Shuichi’s girth. His other weeping cock is left to hump the outside of your vulva as he begins to fuck you into the cushion as promised. “Oh shit, so tight,” he grunts. 

You do your best to focus on your breathing as you're slacked jawed by the pleasure surging through your chest. Breathes exchanged between the both of you are hot and humid, intoxicating. Spinner continues to pump in and out of you at an unforgiving pace, eager to reach his own climax. You lift one of your legs up and he smiles as he takes your suggestion to heart. Your leg gets thrown over Spinner’s shoulder, allowing for him to plow deeper into your fluttering pussy. The only things you both could hear was skin slapping, grunts, whines, and the TV relaying the movie you left to play. The sight of Spinner punishing you for teasing him all this time makes you fall into his submission. 

You can’t stand the knot building up in your stomach, so you hurry your hand to your clit to rub tight circles into it to get closer to some sort of release. Spinner watches as your fingers rub into your button and his mouth falls open again. His eyes are wide and straining to keep on your every move as he pants out, “Uhh, fuck, I love watching you please yourself, gorgeous. Are you getting close again?”

You were teetering on the edge of ecstasy. Spinner’s other cock dripping excitedly as it swells into your lifted leg. “Oh yes, don’t stop, Shuichi.”

“Cum for me, Y/N, cum on my cock.” Once these commanding words left his mouth in this moment, your pupils dilated in lust. Heart beating out of your chest, moving your fingers faster to obey his instruction. The knot in your abdomen unties, and you let your juices flow over his cock in conquest.

This time there’s no riding out your orgasm as Spinner continues to rail into your cunt, chasing after his own sweet release. You stare up at his shaking figure, surprised at him for becoming so domineering in order to please you. You grab your breasts to massage and tease your nipples to give him a different measure to get off on. Finally, his thrusts start to falter before he drops your leg from his shoulder to pull out of you. You whimper at the loss of fullness. “I-I’m gonna come, fuck, where do you want it?” His sounds change from whining pants to primal grunts as he pumps himself to you feeling your chest. 

“Right here, Shuichi, you can cum on my chest,” you give in a sultry voice. You watch his needy expression turn into excitement as he aims to unload on you. You listen to the clicking caused by the mixture of your juices and his precum as he enthusiastically jerks both of his cocks in one large hand. You smile up at him in encouragement as you continue to please your breasts.

“I’m cumming, I’m cumming,” he howls out with his eyes closed, head tossed back once again. Ropes of his cum shoot onto your chest and neck as Spinner moans unabashedly. All the while, you're watching him with a smile, blushing about the mess you made of him. Spinner cools down from his high quickly before he leans down to give you a quick kiss. He climbs out from between your legs to rush to the kitchen for something. You hear drawers being pulled open and slammed shut; his heavy steps against the wood as he frantically searches. Lastly, you hear the sink being turned on to its maximum, and then shut off again.

Stepping sounds come quickly closer towards you and you look up at Shuichi standing above your laying body. Catching his breath, he holds a few damp paper towels at his side, “I couldn’t find any of those nice washcloths in there.” You grin sheepishly as he collects his load from your chest and neck, extremely careful not to get it in your hair. Spinner sets the crumpled ball of paper on the coffee table, and then gives you a hand to help you sit up. 

You both look at the television together, not having realized there's only a half hour or so left of the movie to watch. You laugh together as you see each other get pulled in by the movie again. Spinner grabs the remote to pause it. “Here, uh,” he walks to get your clothes from the ground to hand them to you, “get comfy and then, maybe... we can watch where we left off earlier?” He pulls on his sweatshirt and boxers as you do the same with your outfit.

“Yeah, I'd like that,” you grab the blanket from the floor and motion for him to come sit with you again. Spinner plays the movie once you're both covered by the blanket, more comfortable to hold each other close after what you’d experienced. You let out a sigh in bliss at how your afternoon has turned out.

[talkfastromance4]

Til there was You-- (l.h)

It’s finally here! The Luke&Lily origin story! There are little hints from other blurbs and discussions in here and I hope you find them and I hope you enjoy this as much as I loved writing it. Thank you for loving these characters as much as I do.

Feedback is welcome!

Warnings: slight ptsd and smut near the end

Word count: 5,586

donate to my ko-fi here :)

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Masterlist

Luke&Lily Masterlist

• • • •

Luke didn’t really consider himself to be an observant person. He noticed roses on shirts and lipstick stains on coffee mugs but while he was walking the street the world was but a blur. That all changed when he first saw you sitting across the way at his recently new favorite coffee shop, Dream Bean. It’s become his favorite place to write because it’s quaint and is never crowded.

He noticed you always ordered the same thing, a grande white mocha with extra whip and a cranberry orange muffin. He noticed you would only come here on Fridays and Saturdays. He noticed you always brought a book with you while you’d sip your coffee, eyes never leaving the page as you took a drink. He noticed how bright your eyes were and how kind your smile was when you’d speak to Bailey the barista.

He also noticed you didn’t have a ring on your finger.

While he wrote in his lyric book, Luke also noticed how his words would form into your features. Your careful fingers as you turned the page, the soft shadows on your cheeks from your eyelashes, and the way you nibbled your lip as you read.

It’s been a whole month of his quiet observations of you and when he noticed he wrote a whole song for you while he was at home, he figured he should do something about it. Instead of being the silent observer, he’ll actively pursue.

****

You’d just pulled into the parking spot outside the Dream Bean and spotted the handsome golden curled man you’ve been ogling for the past month through the window. Aside from his good looks, he wouldn’t be hard to spot since he towered over so many and his eyes were a pretty robin’s egg blue.

Your stomach flipped at the sight of him as you got out. You could feel his gaze as you walked through the door, the wind chime jingled your presence. You felt his gaze as you walked past him to the front counter.

“Grande white mocha, extra whip and cranberry muffin?” Bailey asks with a smile.

“You got it,” you chuckle pulling out your card.

“It’s already covered,” she shakes her head and points at the good looking guy.

“Oh uhh… wow, okay,” you blanched putting your card back in the slot behind your phone.

As you make your way to your table, you risk a glance and he’s already looking at you. You give him a warm smile which he returns and you look in front of you again at the right time otherwise you’d bump into the table. You set your purse down and pull out your book, placing your phone next to it face up as you begin reading.

After a few moments you sense a presence next to you.

“Thanks Bailey,” you say continuing to read your last paragraph.

“I’m not Bailey,” a low accented voice says, “but you’re welcome.”

You glance up to see pretty blue eyes holding your order in his hands on a tray, his belongings in his other hand.

“Oh, um, I’m sorry,” you laugh awkwardly. “Thank you for buying it.”

“You’re welcome,” he smiles setting your things down and puts the tray on a nearby table. “I’m Luke by the way.”

“Y/N,” you respond then shift your things around, “do you want to join me?”

“Sure, if you don’t mind.”

“You bought my order, the least I can do is offer you a seat.”

When he situates himself in the chair his knees bump yours and the butterflies are back at the simple innocent touch. He takes out his own notebook and pen and gives you a small grin.

“Oh, you don’t want to talk?” you ask in confusion.

“We can talk later for dinner, I know you like to read your book when you’re here,” he shrugs.

“Dinner, huh? What if I’m busy?”

“Are you busy?” he asks leaning forward, his voice teasing.

“No,” you giggle shaking your head. “Is dinner a date, then?”

“Second date actually,” he points his pen at you.

“Oh? How so?” you raise your eyebrows.

“This is our first one, I bought you coffee and now our second date will be dinner. Now, shh,” he presses his finger to his lips, “reading time.”

During your ‘date’ you and Luke would always glance at each other, you in between paragraphs and him in between writing in his notebook. Finally, huffing and closing your book you look up at him.

“I can’t pay attention with you looking at me,” you laugh and take the last sip of your coffee.

“Yeah I’ve been doodling for the last hour,” he laughs. “How about we cut the first date short and start the second?”

“Sounds good to me.”

After gathering all of your stuff together, you both wave at Bailey at the door and then you pause staring at your car. Is he going to drive or you? Does he even have his car here or did he walk?

“My car’s this way,” he motions pointing to a black SUV.  He opens the door for you and gets in on his own side, starts the car but doesn’t pull away. He just sits there and looks at you.

“What? This isn’t the part where you think of the best way to dice up my body and get rid of the evidence is it?”

“I’m—what? No,” he laughs shaking his head, “I’m thinking of where to take you and I’m trying to guess your favorite food.”

���What do you think?”

“Hmm,” he hums and his eyes scan over your face. You feel yourself blush. “You don’t look like a sushi girl so. . . Italian?”

“Good guess,” you smile wryly then notice your outfit is kind of on the simpler side. High waisted jeans with a blouse and a long sweater. “Um, nowhere too fancy though, okay?”

“You look a lot better than me.”

You take in his outfit. Simple black jeans with little rips in the knees and he’s got on a white t-shirt with silver chains hanging down his neck. His hair looks extra fluffy.

“You look pretty great to me,” you murmur then cover your mouth in embarrassment.

“It’s only our second date and you’re already checking me out, huh?” he teases peeling away from the Dream Bean and onto the main street.

You shake your head but Luke is laughing lightly and he turns the music up a little as he drives to your destination. When he parks you take in the restaurant and it’s a semi-casual Italian restaurant that you always go to with your girlfriends.

“No way, this is my favorite place,” you say.

“You’re just being nice.”

“No, I’m serious! I come here a lot with my girlfriends! Are you stalking me?” you give him a side eye and he barks out a laugh and gets out.

He’s still laughing when he opens your door.

“I swear I’m not a stalker. I come here a lot too, maybe we’ve been here at the same time and never knew it,” he offers.

You follow him into the restaurant, he holds the door open, and you’re seated right away in a booth in the corner away from the other guests. You liked that because you could listen to his voice in your own privacy, it was like honey.

You make light conversation over what to order and then when the food arrives that’s when you get into deep topics.

“I’m in a band, 5 Seconds of Summer, and I’m the lead singer,” he tells you even though you already knew but you weren’t going to tell him that. “You knew didn’t you?”

“What? No I didn’t,” you shake your head as you pick apart your breadstick and dip it in your sauce.

“Whatever,” he chuckles, “what do you do?”

“I’m a paralegal, I make sure things are filed for law firms, preparing contracts and things like that.”

Luke lets out a low whistle, “Wow. That’s impressive.”

“Thank you.”

“Must be good hours for you to have Fridays off then?”

“Um . . . yes and no,” you shift uncomfortably in your seat. You know you couldn’t keep your secret, and you wouldn’t. “Luke, I have to be honest with you about something.”

“Okay,” he answers dubiously.

You take a deep breath and set your fork down, folding your hands together. Luke watches your actions and mimics them.

“I normally save this conversation for second dates and since this is our second one according to you, I’ll tell you know now. I have a daughter. She just turned one two months ago and I know that’s baggage for some people but you need to know. If this is going somewhere or it isn’t. I have her to think about and I’m not looking for a fling.”

Luke stares at you for a moment then starts to nod, he unfolds his hands and picks up his fork and starts eating again.

“Okay, can you tell me about her?”

You stare at him dumbfounded. Was he serious?

“You aren’t . . . upset about it?”

“Why would I be upset about that? You having a daughter . . . yeah it’s a big deal but it’s not a deal breaker. What’s her name?”

You’re still taken aback but you try to compose yourself. Talking about your daughter is your favorite thing to do.

“Her name’s Lily,” you smile proudly, “and she’s wonderful.”

“Does she look like you?” Luke grins.

“I think so, yeah,” you nod blushing. You resume eating.

“I like that name, Lily. It’s pretty and sweet. So, how is it you have off on Fridays?”

“That’s a conversation for date number five,” you answer slyly.

“Then I’ll wait until date number five,” he smiles.

• • • •

Date number five has you and Luke at an aquarium. You hold hands as you walk below the glowing blue water, fish and sharks swimming lazily on by all around you.

“Can I ask you something?” he asks suddenly when you stop to examine a little school of fish.

“Of course,” you say.

“Where does Lily go when you’re with me on Fridays and Saturdays? Do your parents watch her or do you have a babysitter?”

You purse your lips and pick at the chipped paint on the railing in front of the glass.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—“

“No, no you aren’t prying,” you turn to face him and squeeze his hand in assurance. “She’s with her dad Fridays and Saturdays.”

--

You and Cory have been friends for a long time. You first met through a job you had during school and would spend late nights studying or closing up the restaurant where you worked. There was always light teasing with a hint of flirting hanging in the air between you two. It was so palpable that everyone in the restaurant couldn’t believe you weren’t already dating.

One late night after closing, he invited you over to his place for a drink and one thing lead to another and you woke up in his bed the next morning. At first it started out as just a fling, flirting at work and then going back to your place or his to have sex.

When that didn’t last and he asked you if you’d want to make it official with him you were more than happy to say yes.

You were in a relationship for about two years and then he got deployed, he was in the National Guard and when they were called to action he had to go. It was a rough six months but you got through it.

When he came back for a weekend before going out again, you never left the bedroom.

“When will you be home again?” you asked playing with his dog chains on his chest.

“Another six months,” he sighed brushing your hair from your face. “But when I come back, I’ll bring a ring for you.”

“Yeah? What kind of ring?” you smiled so bad your cheeks hurt. On the inside you were screaming.

“You know what kind of ring,” he teased your ring finger with the pad of his own. “I’m just doing patrols, so when this six months is up our life will go back to normal. And we’ll get our own apartment—“

“And a dog?”

“We can get a dog,” he laughed. “You can have whatever you want.”

“I like that plan,” you smiled leaning forward to kiss him, sealing his promise.

----

It was 1:36 in the morning when your phone started ringing from an unknown number, 3 months later.

“Hello? Cory?” You asked sitting up quickly. You flicked on your light.

“No, ma’am, this is Alice from Mercy Hospital. You’re listed as Mr. Cory Stone’s emergency contact.”

“Are you sure? He’s not even in the country—“

“He was airlifted here a few hours ago and he’s still in surgery. It took a long time for us to receive your information but, as you are his emergency contact, is there any way you can come here?”

“Yes, yeah absolutely. Um, I’ll be there in fifteen minutes. Thank you.”

Your voice was robotic as were your movements as you got dressed, and placed your hand on your small bump. You felt a tiny flutter under your touch.

“It’s okay, baby, your daddy’s gonna be fine,” you told your baby and dart out the door.

---

When Cory awoke from his surgery he was an entirely different person. He had to have a double bypass on his heart because while he was on patrol, there was a hidden vigilante that opened fire and shot him right in the chest. Vessels in his heart were damaged which caused the double bypass and there was bleeding in his lungs. He went into cardiac arrest twice while he was airlifted and the medics said he was very lucky to have made it to the hospital and again through his surgery.

Cory was more quiet and sullen, he was quick to anger and when you told him you were pregnant he spent a majority of the time thinking you cheated on him. He was discharged for medical reasons due to his heart and that didn’t sit well with him.

Cory became bitter and resentful and angry that his life was basically over. His words, not yours. He wanted nothing to do with you or the baby and finally, after countless fights that ended with you in tears and him holing himself up in his room, you left.

You left him behind and for the first 9 months of Lily’s life, it was just you and her. You’d had a bond formed already from the 9 months you carried her, but now she was your person and you were hers. You’re thankful that your job at the office of Smith Group Law gave you twelve weeks maternity leave with an option of four more weeks if requested.

You still got paid but biweekly and since the law firm was more female based, they were more than happy for you to work from home as well so you could be with your Lily.

Until you got a letter in the mail signifying he wanted visitation rights to his daughter.

That first night you cried nonstop because for longer than a year, you hadn’t heard a word from Cory. And all of a sudden he wants visitation rights to his daughter he thought wasn’t even his?

Lily heard you crying and crawled over to you from her fort of toys.

“Mama,” she cried and you held onto her, kissing her cheeks and her head.

“Mama’s okay, we’re okay,” you hushed to her.

--

Not wanting this situation to go to court, you took it upon yourself to visit Cory yourself. You’d brought Lily along but she was in the car with your best friend waiting for your signal to bring her by.

“Y/N,” Cory stared at you blankly.

You both took each other in. It’s been so long since you last saw him but he looked so much better. His clothes looked new and clean, his hair is buzzed on the sides with it being a little longer up top but it’s styled nicely. He looked really well.

“Can we talk? Just you and me without lawyers?” You asked.

“Um, yeah. Come in,” he nodded stepping aside.

You took in his condo. Everything was pristine and orderly. Like how it was before his accident. It’s brighter just like he is.

“I know what you’re thinking, but this isn’t all just for show. I really picked myself back up over the last year,” he confessed.

“I’m so glad to hear that Cory, really, I am,” you smiled. “I’m just confused why you got lawyers involved to see Lily. You could have always called me.”

“I wanted you to see I was serious, I didn’t mean to scare you with the whole order thing. After how I treated you after my accident I didn’t think you’d want to see me again. Lily? That’s her name?” he smiled.

“Yeah, Lily Jean,” you smiled. “Cory, you know me. We could always talk about anything and this, Lily, is more important than anything else.”

“Shit,” he rubbed his face with his hands. “I’m sorry. I’d rather this be done without lawyers, too. We can do a compromise, right?”

“Absolutely. You look really good, Cory,” you said as tears welled in your eyes.

“C’mere,” he smiled and opened his arms. You wrapped your arms around his waist and you cried into his shirt. He held you tightly, hands rubbing your back.

You thought after so long of not seeing him you’d be right back where you were, in love. But all you felt for him was a solid friendship built on love that has many roots of memories and from those roots you had your own little flower of Lily.

After a long hugging session, he wiped your tears away while you laughed.

“She’s outside if you want to meet her? Then we can talk about a plan.”

“I’d like that,” he nodded then ran off to the living room. When he came back he was holding small fuzzy purple blanket.

 ****

“So, that’s the story of her dad,” you finished just as a sea turtle glided by.

Luke took a step closer to you, his thumb swipes at your cheek.

“I didn’t mean to make you cry, lovie.”

“I’m not crying, am I?” you panic and feel the wetness on your cheeks. “I’m sorry. He’s great with her, it’s just a tough subject sometimes.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” he shakes his head then tilts your chin up so you look at him. “Lily’s lucky to have a strong mother like you.”

Luke places his fingers on your cheeks, pulling you close and pauses when his lips are barely brushing yours. You nudge your nose against his and your lips finally touch in the sweetest kiss. It’s filled with promise and mutual longing.

“I hope that was okay,” he whispers once you both pull away to catch your breath.

“It was perfect,” you smile and give him one more peck.

 ****

It’s been three months that you’ve been seeing Luke every Friday and Saturday while Lily’s at Cory’s place. He’s taking you out to a special dinner at a five star restaurant promising you’ll love their steak.

“Is it smaller than my fist?” you ask taking his hand as he helps you out of the car. You decided to wear a little black dress with some red pumps finished off with a red lip. You wanted to feel sexy tonight, for yourself and for Luke.

“Order two steaks lovie,” he chuckles handing the keys to the valet. You raise your eyebrows at Luke from the luxury. He blushes.

When the hostess seats you and hands you two menus, they offer you the house wine.

“No wine, but the lady will have an amaretto sour and I’ll have a tequila soda, please,” Luke tells her.

“You remembered I don’t like wine,” you praise with a smile. Your stomach flips at the notion.

“I remember a lot of things about you,” he smiles.

You blush and look down at the menu. Your eyes widen and you gasp at the prices of the appetizers alone.

“Luke! This is insanely pricey!” you hiss leaning over the menu.

“Y/N, don’t worry about it, trust me.”

“I don’t have enough to chip in—“

“Y/N,” he says your name more seriously and pulls your hand from the menu so he can hold it. “This is my treat to you, I want tonight to be special, okay? You can buy all my coffee at the Dream Bean for the next year, I promise.”

You sigh through your nose, ignoring the flipping of your stomach at his suggestion of a year of being with him.

Throughout the dinner, you couldn’t keep your eyes off of Luke. His hair was slicked back with his curls under his ears and his white shirt had the top three buttons undone underneath his suit jacket. His chest hair peeked through and you couldn’t believe you were with this angel of a man.

“Are you checking me out over there?” he smirks once you’re both finished eating.

“What if I am?” you tease and then the waitress appears next to the table.

“Would you like dessert? Its chocolate mousse layered with chocolate cake and whipped cream,” she informs.

“We’ll take dessert to go with the check please,” Luke tells her but his gaze is on you. You feel the heat of his gaze between your thighs.

After paying, getting the cake in a to-go box and waiting for the valet to bring Luke’s car around front, you felt how different the air between you and him was. It was static and electric and each brush of his elbow against your arm left a spark.

You both snuck glances at each other on the drive to his house, the golden lights illuminating his face. When he stops at a yellow light just before it turns red, he grabs hold of your bare knee so you don’t lurch forward. When you don’t move his hand, he takes that as a green light and slides it between your thigh, his hand hot and soft against your skin.

For the rest of the drive, his thumb rubs circles on your leg and you’re counting down the minutes until you’re at his place.

He kills the ignition and you both get out of the car, sensing what the other is feeling as you follow him inside. He tosses the cake box onto the counter and presses his lips against yours in a needy way. Your fingers work on shoving his jacket off his broad shoulders and he pushes you against a wall. His arms cage you in and he stops the kiss to watch you undo his shirt, pulling it off him.

His breathing is ragged as you run your palms through his chest hair and down onto his stomach, he inhales when you touch the edge of his dress pants. You lift your eyes to his pretty blue ones, he’s looking at you with such intensity and need it’s almost as if you’re looking at yourself because that’s exactly what you’re feeling.

He steps closer, tugging on your top lip, teeth grazing your skin before his tongue slips inside. Luke’s hands graze down your sides, his fingers grabbing onto your ass and squeezes. You’re pulled away from the wall.

“Jump,” he mumbles.

You spring up on your feet and he catches you easily walking down the hallway to his bedroom. He lets you slide from his arms, his fingers moving the zipper of your dress down its track. You pull your arms from the sleeves letting it fall to your feet. Luke groans when you press your naked chest against his.

His hands cup your cheek, his nose rubs against yours.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he breathes before kissing you deeply.

He turns you around so he can get on the bed first, his fingers pull on your arms to follow him. Luke lays down and you straddle his waist, you love the feel of his large hands roaming over your ass, he tugs on the band of your lace panties. You shimmy out of them and then he taps the backs of your thighs.

“What?” you pant moving your lips to his ear, tugging on his lobe and it makes him moan.

“Sit on my face,” he mumbles kissing your neck.

You move back slowly and stare at him. Did you hear him correctly?

“What?”

He swallows harshly as if he’s nervous but his hands say otherwise as he tries to get you to move up his body.

“I asked for my dessert to go,” he smiles then jerks his head upwards. “Hop on.”

“Okay,” you smile against his lips before giving him a quick peck and following his instructions.

Your heart is hammering in your chest as you situate yourself above him, you can feel his breath as he exhales onto you. His fingers are splayed on your thighs, squeezing lightly and you rest your forearms on his headboard. And then you feel his tongue slip through your folds and you can’t even contain the moan from your mouth.

He hums as if in approval then flattens his whole tongue on you before suctioning his mouth on your opening. Your head falls to your arms enjoying the pleasure. Whenever you moan Luke squeezes your thighs and dives in deeper, he pulls your hips down closer. His tongue flicks persistently at you and soon you’re rocking your hips against his mouth, arching your body so his tongue hits the perfect spot.

“So good, Luke,” you sigh and throw your head back when he hums some more.

You feel your orgasm creeping up your body and you move your hips faster letting it take you over. He suctions his mouth on your clit again, moving his head from side to side as you come all over him. His name tumbles from your lips.

“Mm,” you whine as you slow your hips and his hold on your thighs loosen.

“Stay there,” he breathes against your sensitive core. You hear some shuffling as he kicks off his pants. “Okay, get down here lovie.”

You try not to collapse on top of him as you shift down his body. You moan when you feel his dick hit your thigh and his hands are all over your back as you descend. When your faces align you connect your lips with his, tongues rolling over each other and he lifts his hips. His head presses against your entrance and you’ve never wanted anyone more.

“Condom?” you whisper.

“Already on.”

“Mm, you’re fast,” you giggle and he presses into you. You groan at the feeling.

“Wanna feel you, baby,” he mumbles and pushes in a bit more. “You taste like honey.”

You groan at his words and lower yourself onto his dick until he’s inside you fully. You both sigh as he fills you up plentifully. His fingers trace up and down your back and you take that as a cue to start moving. You raise your hips then drop them back down, feeling him glide in and out of you.

You find a comfortable pace, one that feels good and hits just the right spot and it has you close your eyes. You focus on his hands on you, on him sliding in and out so easily, the soft slap of skin on skin.

“Look at me,” he sighs.

You open your eyes slowly to be met with his.

“You’re so perfect . . . look at you.”

You kiss him sloppily and move your hips faster, trying to gather speed and chase your second orgasm. Luke helps you by thrusting up into you and you’re moaning into his mouth. Before you can finish he’s flipped you over and hammers himself in and out of you swiftly.

“You’re . . . perfect,” you pant as he fucks you deeper and faster. You turn your head into his arm next to you, you kiss his wrist and when he hits your special spot you accidentally bite onto his skin as you cry out in pleasure.

“Fuck,” he groans, his hips snap faster and faster. Your bodies jostle one another as he comes as well. His movements become jerky and when he stills, you remove your mouth from his wrist.

He’s panting on your chest trying to gather his breath, and you smile at the tingling sensation left in your body.

“Stay right here,” he murmurs kissing your breast lightly and slips off you.

You watch him move about the room and flick on his bathroom light, it washes you in a bright yellow. He disposes of the condom and gets a washcloth and towel. Your legs jerk when you feel the warm cloth between your legs.

“Sorry,” he hushes and wipes away at you tenderly between your legs and on your stomach. He pats you dry and kisses your tummy.

He joins you in bed and you lay on top of him, frowning.

“No fair, I’m the only one who has sex hair.”

“You left your mark,” he chuckles holding up his wrist.

You move it into the light from the bathroom and gasp. There’s a nasty red mark of your teeth on his left wrist.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t think I bit you that hard!” you bend down and kiss the spot carefully.

“It’s okay, you’re my little vampire,” he laughs squeezing you against him.

You shift your gaze to his and you hold his face in your hands, staring at him in awe. You’ve never felt this way about anyone before. You thought you did with Cory but this was more intense, more raw and real. It scared you and thrilled you all at once.

“Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“I . . .”

You hear the hesitancy and the following two words hanging off his tongue just as you feel them ready to burst from your chest. Three little words that hold so much weight in them. But it’s too early to say them now, it’s only been three months.

“Me too,” you smile and kiss his nose. Some things can be heard unspoken.

****

It’s the Sunday after you spent the weekend at Luke’s and you’re walking up Cory’s sidewalk. It’s also been five months that you’ve been seeing Luke. You’re going to tell Cory you’ve been dating someone and that you want him to meet Lily, that it’s serious and you want Lily to meet him too.

You’re nervous as you knock on the door before opening it. He always unlocks it when you’re coming and you feel a sense of security and trust in that.

“Mama!” Lily shrieks from the living room.

She hobbles her way over to you with the help of Cory holding onto her whole hand with just one of his fingers.

“Hi my baby!” you smile happily and meet her halfway to scoop her up in your arms. She hugs your neck as you hug her back. “Did you have fun with daddy?”

“We watched Zootopia all day, every day,” Cory sighs with a smile. “She ate all her blueberries, but you have to do it with a fork.”

“Good girl eating all your fruit!” you tickle her tummy and kiss her cheek then look up at Cory. “Can I talk to you about something?”

“Yeah. What’s up?”

“Can we sit?” you chew on your lip nervously and move to his kitchen table. You position Lily in your lap and give her a toy that’s left on the table, it’s a set of keys. Cory sits across from you. “So, we both promised if one of us was serious about someone and wanted to meet Lily, we’d talk to each other first. Well . . . I’ve been dating someone for the last five months and I want him to meet her.”

Cory rubs his chin and chuckles nervously.

“That’s not what I was expecting,” his dark brown eyes shift from Lily to yours. “Who is he?”

“His name is Luke and he’s a really great guy, you’d like him. He’s a lead singer in a band from Australia and they do really well. They’re working on their fifth album right now and he didn’t run when I told him about Lily.”

“He didn’t run when you told him about me?” Cory grins.

“No,” you roll your eyes and hold onto the keys Lily’s playing with as she shakes them around. “If you want to meet him too, I can—“

“I can wait,” he shakes his head. “Thanks for telling me. I’m sure he’s . . . I’m sure he is a great guy to catch your eye. Hopefully Lils likes him.” he tickles the bottom of her foot and she giggles.

“I think she will. He has a dog.”

“Arf! Arf!” Lily chirps and causes you both to laugh.

“Good girl, Lily, that’s what a dog makes,” you praise her and kiss her cheek.

You look up at Cory to see him already staring back at you. He opens his mouth to say something, but closes it and watches you rock Lily from side to side.

“She’s perfect,” Cory says softly.

• • • •

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[deanscroissant]

Enemies with Benefits

Request:  Anon: (I know this is A LOT, and also a bit weird, so it's totally okay if you don't feel like writing it) Being enemies with benefits with Joe, but secretly loving each other... then he finds out your feelings and keeps teasing you and making you jealous to make you admit them... so you have a fight, but then you talk it out and finally get together

Parings: Joe Mazzello x Reader

Word Count: she’s lengthy (3,182)

Warnings: Asshole Joe, angst, fluff, a dash of smut, implied smut. Also, don’t ever get with a dude like this. This is purely fiction. 

Beta’d by: @beesonestopcurioshop​ (thank you so so much 😭💛)

A/N: Soooo this request was from waaay back in October, along with two other posts. This is why I can’t do requests because I’m too much of a perfectionist. If you remembered requesting this please message me so I know you’re still around. 💀 But anyway, hope you all enjoy and feedback is greatly appreciated! 💕

Tags: @mrsmazzello @seven-seas-of-ham-on-rhye​ @joemazzelloisboredandsoami​ @pastelhybristophiliac​

gif credit: @esmeralda​

“Your stroke game was weak.” You said bluntly to Joe while panting as he collapses onto the bed next to you from throwing his condom away.

“Oh, fuck off.” He replies back with an eye roll, knowing that you were lying. “You weren’t saying that yesterday when you were begging me to make you cum.”

“Because I had work and I didn’t have the time for teasing!” You jolted out of bed frustrated to put back on your clothes. “And, plus, that was yesterday. Today’s a brand new day with countless disappointments!”

“Well, at least I was satisfied.” He smirked as he watched you get dressed, loving the fact that you were ticked off. 

“Of course. All you think about is yourself.” You were looking around to find your phone when you didn’t see it on Joe’s nightstand. “Where’s my phone?”

“You left it downstairs.” Joe yawns. “Wow, you wore me out... and not in a good way.”

You rolled your eyes as you slipped on your pumps, “You wore yourself out.” You stood from the bed to slip your coat on. From the corner of your eye, you could see Joe watching your every move.

Honestly, you wanted to jump back into bed with him. But you’re not going to let him know that. Instead, you put on a look of exasperation to hide what you’ve felt for the ginger man since you’ve met him. 

“What, puny?” you say with a hand on your hip. 

“Nothing.” He scoffs before sitting up from the bed, also covering up what he’s been really feeling about you. 

You roll your eyes, “Same time Thursday?”

Joe shakes his head while crossing his arms, “Can’t. I’m meeting someone.”

“What do you mean ‘someone’? That’s against the rules!” 

“How would you know if it's a girl or not? As I said, I’m meeting with someone. It’s really none of your business.” He says bluntly, making your stomach drop hearing him say that. 

Deep down you were jealous. Whenever Joe was going out with someone, who he never mentions their name, you’d get extremely jealous and guilty. You never knew if he was sleeping around with other people, but he says he isn’t.

Sometimes you can’t believe everything he tells you because he’s always lying to you. You don’t even know why it was such a good idea to have this friend with benefits thing going on between you two. 

You’ve known Joe for a few years from working in the same company together back in your college days. You both hated each other the minute you met. He was always competitive but you were the total opposite of him. You were so glad that you didn’t have to deal with him or see him ever again after you graduated.

After almost fifteen years of not seeing his annoying ass, the asshole finds you on Tinder of all places. It was odd seeing him on there, and it pissed you off that he found you. You figured if you acted like he didn’t exist it would help, but to your luck, you ended up seeing him days later in a grocery store… of all places.

For some reason, you couldn’t get away from this guy no matter what you did or how hard you tried. You’d actually give him a chance if he wasn’t so bad. Back in college, he was good looking, but now he looks sexy as hell. 

He wanted to catch up so you invited him to your apartment later that day around seven. The conversations you were having we're going well. He told you about being a well-known actor, which didn’t surprise you because you knew he had the talent when he did Jurassic Park. But then the asshole started bringing up old shit that pissed you off.

You fired back at him about himself, which made him pissed as well. You both were going back and forth arguing until Joe just kissed you. 

Of course, you were taken aback, but you both knew the sexual tension was there for a while. One thing led to another, and the next morning he was gone. He did send you a text message saying how awful last night's activities were just to hide the fact that he actually enjoyed spending time with you, and wanted to meet up again. 

You told him to fuck off and to not speak to you ever again and blocked his number. 

Fast forward a month later and Joe shows up on your doorstep. He was a little drunk and before you cursed at him he pleaded that he needed someone to talk to. The kind person that you are, you let him in and you two went into your kitchen, going to your fridge to grab two water bottles. You handed him one and sat next to him to listen to whatever he needed to get out in the open. 

He flat out told you that he was lonely and wanted a friend with benefits thing going on between you two. You looked at him like he was crazy. “Are you off your meds? Why the hell would I want that with you? First off, what possessed you to think that?”

“Well,” he sighed. “I actually enjoyed sleeping with you, surprisingly.”

As Joe took a sip of his water your mind began racing. ‘Did he confess that he actually likes being around me? Is he gonna say that he likes me?’ The thoughts ran through your mind, but you were interrupted by Joe’s laugh. He almost spat out his water when he looked over at you. “Damn, don’t think too much about it. I just enjoyed the sex.”

You rolled your eyes, “Whatever. I actually liked it as well. But what makes you think I could trust you?”

“Well, we’ve known each other for a long time...and I can prove it to you that I’ll follow the rules. I mean come on, when have I ever broken the rules while competing with you?” He gives you a knowing smirk. 

It was true, admittingly. You guys competed at almost everything together which you’re too embarrassed to say out loud. But Joe knew your weaknesses and strongest points about you. If he really disliked you he wouldn’t be sitting here in your kitchen and made you his worst enemy possible by now. You’ve seen Joe ruined a few people’s lives before, so it’s weird to think that he didn’t destroy yours...yet.

“Give me tomorrow to figure out what I want to do,” you said while screwing the top back on your bottle. 

“I want an answer now, y/n,” he says sternly. 

“I said what I said, Joe,” you said back in the same tone with your arms crossed. 

“And I said what I said.”

You let out a huff. “I’m not letting you win this.”

Joe gives you a wide smile with a small chuckle, “You know better than to go back and forth with me of all people.”

“Well, I don’t know yet, Joe. I need some time to think over some things.”

“To think over what? We’re just hate fucking, basically!”

“Yeah well, how do I know if you’re clean or not? Are you sure you’re not seeing anyone just to get back at them for who knows what?” 

“Oh honey,” he cooed with an evil smirk, knowing what he’ll say would tick you off. “I didn’t know you wanna go raw. So kinky.”

“Over. My. Dead. Body.” you grunted.

“You and I both know that’s not true.” He got a little closer to where his alcohol-smell breath fanned your face. Your heart picked up a little bit more speed as he scanned your face, then stared at your lips while licking and biting his. Gosh, you actually wanted to kiss him right then and there. The tension in the air had become heavy, and Joe knew what he was doing was going to convince you to give him his answer at this moment. 

“If...if I say yes, would you stop eye-fucking me because it’s making me uncomfortable.” you lied. 

“Oh sorry. I forgot you’re not used to that,” he said with a proud smile at his joke, which made you heated. 

“I’ll do it, now get out!” you shouted while pointing towards the door. Joe laughed and happily jumped from his seat, saying his goodbyes and telling you that he’ll call you for more details. 

And here you two were five months into it. The same days, the same routine. Joe almost made you late once for work and you let him have it the next time you saw him. He knew that one thing you don’t play about is your job and it meant the world to you. Shockingly enough Joe respected it and ever since you’ve always been on time. 

But right now you don’t know if you wanted to risk it. It would bother you all day if you didn’t know who Joe was going to see. You weren’t in a relationship with him so why did it matter? Maybe because you think you’re really into him...or maybe because you’re always staring at him, or you’re always thinking about him and you genuinely want the guy to be happy. 

You were snapped out of your thoughts when Joe waved a hand in your face. He was already dressed and a look of concern was on his face. “Are you good? You’ve been zoned out for a while.”

“I’m...I’m fine.” you started to pick up your clothes off the floor, “Just let me know when you want me to come over.”

Joe stares at you for a minute as you rush around your room. You trusted Joe enough by now to let himself out and to come in whenever. But before he left he couldn’t help but think that something is quite off about you. Well, he always thought there was something off about you, but it rubbed him off the wrong way the way you zoned out just now. On Thursday he really wasn't going to meet anyone. He was going out to buy some stuff to set up a dinner date in his house for you and him. Until then, he’ll want to know what that was all about, so he’ll make sure to drain every piece of information from you.

*Thursday*

It was around six o’clock when you’d got home from work. Once you got out of your clothes to whine down for the day, you get a text from Joe saying, ‘Come over. Now.’

You let out an annoyed groan. You honestly didn’t feel like having sex tonight. When the other wouldn’t feel like doing so, we’ll respect it. But when Joe sent back a ‘You have to. It’s important.’, it made your ears perk. He never sent anything like that to you which was concerning. 

“So much for binge-watching Tiger King the rest of the night,” you say aloud before getting up and rush to go get ready. 

When you get to his place you pull out the key that he gave you to open the door. When you walked in you were welcomed with the aroma of freshly baked bread and garlic. The lights in his house were dimmed, and the door to the dining room was illuminated by firelight. Scrunching your face you quickly walked into the room. What you saw made you let out an audible gasp. 

Joe was sitting at the table that was full of food smirking. There were two lit candles sitting in the middle of it, and an ice bucket with wine sitting to his left. You were getting ready to speak, but Joe cut you off, “There’s this girl that I’ve known for more than a decade. When I first laid eyes on her she gave me this feeling that I’ve never felt before. Getting to know her was the fun part because I found out that we had almost everything in common. But it was hard trying to express my feelings to her, which resorted to me being vile towards her.”

Joe got up and walked to you with his hands in his pockets while looking down, trying to find the right words. “She acted the same towards me, which,” He looks up at you with a shrug. “was expected.” 

He stops and stares at you, a small smile forming on his lips. “After parting ways when we graduated I thought I would never see her again. All these years I tried to find her. She didn’t have Facebook or Twitter or any type of social media. She probably did but used a pseudonym for them.” he lightly chuckled. “But when I found her I felt like I had found my other half that I lost. We’ve been seeing each other for months and I have yet to tell her my feelings. Do you think it’s too late to tell her?” 

The rhetoric question flew over your head when you spoke, “Are you talking about me?” you stammered while pointing to yourself. Joe rolled his eyes, “No, I’m talking about Ke$ha.”

You stood there shocked. Here he was confessing his love to you and you couldn’t find the words to confess yours. “Joe...oh Joe, this is so overwhelming.”

“What’s so overwhelming about it?” he asked, confused. 

“Joe, you don’t want me. I think you’re getting too comfortable.” you crossed your arms and looked down at your shoes. “So you broke the rules.”

You couldn’t tell Joe how you felt because you think he was lying to you. There was no way in heck that he loved you because in your book actions speak louder than words, and his actions confirmed that he’s playing a trick on you. He’s probably doing this because he wants to remind you that no one would ever do anything like this for you. 

Joe’s heart broke at what you said. “Y/n, what are you talking about? I don’t want you? Look at all this food I cooked from scratch! I spent almost four hours busting my ass to cook this lovely meal for you, and finally confessing how I felt about you. And you think all of this came from the sex?”

“Well, Joe, I can’t take you seriously, alright? The text that you sent me earlier was the only time out of however many years I’ve known you that I took you seriously.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.” you retorted. “I don’t know if you’re doing this to crush my self-esteem, even more, to get a kick out of it later.”

Joe looks at you stunned. “That’s what you really think of me?”

“You’ve portrayed the asshole persona for all of the years I’ve known you so no shit, Sherlock!” 

“Well, for now on I will never put you down. I’ll never act like an asshole to you ever again because I’m in love with you!”

“Shut up! You sound ridiculous. I’m leaving!” you get ready to turn to leave when Joe grabs your arm. 

“It’s the truth, dammit! I’ve never wanted to be with someone so badly in my life. Out of all the girls I’ve been with they don’t compare to you, y/n. I’m telling you, you’re it for me. I can’t let you leave me. Not again. I don’t know how I’ll act if you walk out that door and never speak to me again.”

At this point, you were in tears. You were conflicted at his words, yourself. You didn’t know what to think. “Joe, I don’t know.”

“Let me prove it to you.” he moves his hands down to yours and holds them. 

“You always say that,” you said while wiping your face. 

“But I do it, don’t I?”

“I just...I just don’t get it. All these years—the way you treated me…”

“I wasn’t the only bad guy here. We both were assholes to each other,” he said with a sad smile. 

“But you made me act like an asshole. Like you said earlier, you acted vile to me which led me to retaliate.” you look up at him and he sighs, rubbing his thumb against the back of your hand. 

“I know. I understand if you don’t want to be with me, but I want you to know that I truly love you and I want this relationship to work.” He lifts your chin up with his finger for you to look him back in the eyes. He wants you to see his pleading eyes, to know that he means everything he’s saying. “I promise you from this day forward that I won’t be a dick to you. I want you in my life, y/n.”

You were crying again and Joe cupped your face and wiped your tears with his thumbs. You close your eyes and sigh heavily. “Joey…” you said softly, which shocked both of you but you both didn’t show it. It felt right when you said it and Joe’s heart felt like it was melting. He wants to hear you call him that for the rest of his life. 

“Yes?” he said and smiled softly. 

“I um…” you couldn’t find the words, so you cupped his face in your hands and kissed him. It definitely wasn’t like any of the other kisses you had with him, but it felt like it was your first time kissing him. It was a kiss that you both longed for and you finally broke the seal. The warmth courses through your veins that heats up your body. You felt like you were floating.

When you pulled away Joe slowly opened his eyes and his lips formed into a big, genuine smile. It made your heart flutter and you smiled back at him shyly. “So is that a yes?” he asked while wrapping his arms around you to pull you close to him. 

You rolled your eyes but let out a laugh. “Of course, stupid. Do you think we should eat now before the food gets cold?”

“Oh! Right.” he laughs before pulling your chair out for you, to which you thanked him. You watched as he grabbed the wine bottle from the ice bucket and poured both of you a glass of wine. 

After you toast and began your meal, Joe had to ask you an important question. “What’s that?” you asked before eating a forkful of mashed potatoes. 

“That day when I asked you if you were okay because you had zoned out, what were you thinking about?” 

Your face flushed at his question. “Do you really want to know?” 

He nods while smiling, waiting for you to answer. As you explained to him what you were thinking the other day you could see how your words were affecting him. It was something that made you realize that you want to speak these loving words to him for the rest of your life. He was meant to be in your life for a reason and you couldn’t imagine avoiding him anymore. 

[benedictshurley]

Positive : Part 13

So, it’s been almost two years since I updated this story and I finally have another part for everyone! I’ll link the masterlist in case you guys want to reread! I don’t know if i’ll continue past this part for awhile, I might release a summary of how I planned it to end when I first came up with this concept. Masterlist here

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Pairing: Rob Benedict x Reader  

Word Count: 2,188

Warnings: non explicit smut, fluff, angst, time jump 

Disclaimer: this is pure FICTION. I mean no harm or hurt to the Benedict family, or others involved. Marnie is Rob’s fictional wife from Kings of Con. I originally used Mollie (his real wife) but ultimately decided to change it as it made me uncomfortable writing about her and his kids.

(Gif Below is mine.)

Previously on Positive

“Yes Rob. I am completely and utterly in love with you. I’ve been trying to hide it but I can’t anymore. And I just hope that deep down, you still love me too.” Your voice matched your face. Hopeful. “Please say you still love me and I’m not too late.”

Rob was still silent. It took him a moment before he opened his mouth. “I.”

Taking his silence as a no, you flushed red and tried to head toward the door. “This was stupid i should’ve known i was too late-”

You were stopped by Rob grabbing your wrist.

“Yes. God yes. I still love you.” Rob gripped your face in his hands before pressing his lips against yours.

Moving in sync, the two of you kissed passionately, your fingers tangling in rob’s hair. 

“I love you so much. Fuck.” You spoke against his lips. 

The kiss was messy and teeth bumped each other but you didn’t care. All you wanted was Rob.

Rob pulled away for a moment. “Fuck wait, As much as I want to do this..you’re with Stephen. I can’t do this to him.”

You cupped Rob’s face. “We broke up. He tried making me choose between you and him..and I chose you.”

Rob’s grin returned as he kissed you once more, his fingers gripping the back of your shirt.

“Clothes..off.” You mumbled, fumbling with his t-shirt. 

Rob complied and helped you with his shirt, before he moved to yours and lifted it over your head before connecting your lips with his own once more. 

As the minutes passed, the clothes piled up on the floor and you two made it to the bed. Rob’s hands went up and down your body, a moan leaving your lips. 

“Rob..I love you so much.” You cupped his cheek.

“I love you too.” Rob kissed your neck as he spread your legs, and sheathed himself inside of you.

The next hour was filled with breathy moans and skin slapping against skin, and your nails dragging down Rob’s back, marking him up.

“You look so beautiful pregnant. That's our baby.” Rob breathed out, kissing your neck softly

“Ours. No one else's. Fuck right there.” You moaned, arching your back off the bed. 

Soon, you and Rob reached your climax, nearly simultaneously. As he pulled out of you, you relaxed into the bed, breathing heavily.

“That’s even better, completely sober.”  You laughed quietly.

Rob chuckled as well, laying next to you and covering your lower halves with the sheet. 

“I agree.” He smiled and turned to face you, pushing some hair away from your face. 

The next morning, you awoke in Rob’s arms, a smile on your face. As he slept, you got up and cleaned up in the bathroom, finding robs discarded t shirt and your underwear to feel less exposed. You climbed on his lap, and kissed his face softly to wake him up. 

As he stirred, you grinned and ran your fingers through his hair. “Morning sleepyhead.”

He put his hands on your hips and blinked awake. “Morning to you too. Nice shirt.” He chuckled.

“Thanks, I think I pull it off.” You laughed, kissing him softly.

He kissed back for a moment before sitting up with you in his lap. “Good to know last night wasn’t a dream.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck and played with the hairs at the nape of it. “It definitely wasn’t.”

Rob’s hands moved from your hips to your stomach, rubbing over the bump slowly. “I love you both so much.”

“We love you too.” You kissed him again, and he kissed back, turning you over so you were on your back and he was on top of you.

Both of you were too engrossed in each other to heard Rob’s door open. Only when you heard Rich shout “Woah Bobbo!” did Rob remove his hand from your breast and quickly cover you with his body. 

“Rich learn to knock!” Rob groaned, covering your lower half with the sheet. 

“Sorry didn’t know you had company..especially not Y/N. Glad to see you two made up.” Richard set Rob’s coffee on the small desk in the room. “I’ll see you two downstairs for checkout.” 

As soon as he left, you burst into giggles. “Well..guess I should go pack and get ready for the flight.” 

Two Months Later, January 2019, 32 Weeks

After that night in Minnesota, you and Rob became official. You spent Christmas together, and you even got to meet Rob’s son Tyler and thankfully, he liked you. Marnie and Rob were moving through with divorce proceedings and switched off each week on Tyler. Now you were currently in Missouri, meeting Rob’s close family for the first time. That includes his mom, two sisters, and Matt. At least you’ve met Matt before. You were nervous and it showed on your face as you two pulled into Rob’s family home. You had opted to drive as you were over the recommended stage of flying for your pregnancy.

“Babe, you need to relax. They’re not gonna skin you alive or something.” Rob put his hand on your thigh, squeezing it lovingly. 

“I’m just nervous. What if your mom hates me? I broke up your marriage and we’re having a baby out of wedlock and I know how people can be about that even in 2019 but-” You began to ramble 

Rob put his free hand over your mouth and sighed. “Y/N you’re rambling. They’re going to love you. And our daughter. They weren’t the biggest fans of Marnie anyways. Okay?”

You relaxed a little and nodded as you both got out of the car, Rob forbidding you from carrying any of your bags or presents into the house. 

“Robert, I'm pregnant, not invalid.” You crossed your arms. 

“You only have 8 weeks left until your due date. Not risking you going into early labor in Missouri.” Rob hauled your things up to the door and opened it without knocking. “The R Benedicts have arrived!”

You blushed when he included you in the Benedicts. You guess it made sense, considering you were carrying a Benedict. Matt soon came to help Rob and gave you a quick hug and you were whisked away by the Benedict girls to go in the kitchen with their mother. 

Almost immediately they sat you down at the table while Vivian was washing dishes. 

“So..” Amy asked, curiously. “How are you feeling? 8 weeks left? Any cold feet? Wanting to ditch my brother and have the baby in Uruguay?”

You opened your mouth to reply but Nancy cut in. “No other secret baby daddies?”

Slightly offended, you cleared your throat. “I’m feeling fine, no I’m not going to ditch your brother and have the baby in Uruguay, and no I’m not cheating on Rob either.” You said with a fake smile. 

“Oh girls leave her alone!” Vivian turned off the sink. “If Robbie likes her then we should too. And she's carrying your niece. My granddaughter.” 

They groaned but apologized, and soon went off to tend to their own children in the backyard. Vivian sat down next to you and grabbed your hand.

“Are you feeling okay dear? Any signs of labor? How was the drive?”  She asked, genuinely caring.

“I’m feeling good, only Braxton hicks contractions so far. The drive...was okay. Would’ve been here a few hours ago but my legs kept cramping and I kept having to pee. I think I annoyed Rob a bit though.” You chuckled nervously. “Oh! We have ultrasounds for you.” you grabbed your bag and dug them out. “She looks like her father.”

Vivian looked at them with admiration. “Oh she does. Robbie had that same nose when he was born.” 

Rob came up behind you and rubbed your shoulders. “See I told you. She looks like me.” 

You rolled your eyes. “I know she does. Carry her for almost 10 months of my life and she’s gonna look like him.”

Later that night, you were exchanging Christmas gifts with his family. You got plenty for the baby, and Rob got a decent amount for himself, and they gave him Tyler’s presents because it was Marnie's week and she wouldn’t budge. Vivian even got you a beautiful maternity sweater. 

It was about 7 P.M when you heard the doorbell, as you were cleaning up from dessert with Amy and Matt. You shrugged it off and continued cleaning until you heard Rob ask someone what they were doing here. 

You wiped your hands and went out toward Rob before freezing in your steps. Marnie was here, Tyler already being inside and with his grandma. 

“Marnie why are you here? You weren’t invited.” Rob spat, looking back at you with apologetic eyes.

“I’m always invited to the Benedict January Christmas!  Plus I have wonderful news!” She forced her way inside and a majority of the Benedicts glared at her. 

You crossed your arms. “Marnie you aren’t a benedict anymore.”

Marnie looked over at you and sneered. “Neither are you, homewrecker.”

Rob quickly got in the middle, protecting you behind him. “Okay that’s enough. Tyler can stay but you need to leave Marnie. I don’t know what you’re trying to pull but it's not going to work.” 

“But Rob, we can’t get divorced now. I came to tell you that.” Marnie had a grin on her face, it was a bit too wide for your liking. 

Rob was confused. “Why not? I haven’t heard anything from my lawyer.”

You were starting to get nervous now, and you felt a little dizzy. 

“They can’t divorce us, because I’m 10 weeks pregnant! And it’s a Benedict.” Marnie smiled and pulled her coat open, showing a little bump.

You don’t remember what happened after, because you fainted, your heart pounding in your ears. 

When you woke up, you were on Rob’s childhood bed with a warm cloth on your head and Rob pacing the room. When he noticed you were awake, he quickly sat next to you.

“Are you okay? Do you feel okay? We checked the doppler while you were passed out, the heartbeat is still strong so everything’s fine with her but-” Rob rambled.

“Rob stop..I’m fine. Just, how can that baby be yours? You guys split up before you could’ve possibly conceived that baby.” Your head was pounding as your once perfect world was crumbling beneath your feet. 

Rob put his head in his hands. “A few days after the album release, I went to get my things, and she was there..I was so mad and she kept coming onto me..I regretted it immediately after it happened.”

You felt bile begin to rise in your throat. “Have you seen her since then?”

“No! Baby no of course not. I have not and will not cheat on you. Do you understand me?” Rob cupped your face but you slowly pulled them off.

“Rob, you shouldn’t have kept that from me. When we started this relationship we agreed to be open and honest with each other because of our past. This isn’t being open and honest!” You raised your voice a little.

“It was before we got together! I didn’t think it mattered!” He yelled back.

“Well it does! She’s pregnant with your baby! I don’t know how to handle this!” You stood when rob did.

“It was a MISTAKE. I thought she was still on birth control!” Rob yelled.

“Every time we’re happy it gets fucked up because of her! I can’t deal with this! Not so close to my due date!” you paced back and forth.

“You can’t just blame her! It takes two to tango. You of all people should know that.” Rob shouted.

“What the hell does that mean?!” You screamed back

“Because the same thing happened to us! I just didn’t think i’d be stupid enough to make the same mistake twice!” Rob spat.

You whimpered softly. “So she’s a mistake now?” 

Robs eyes softened as he saw the tears in your eyes. “Baby no I didn’t-”

“I’m a mistake too? You promised me I wasn’t! You told me you didn’t regret it!” You began to shove your phone and keys into your purse and pulled your coat on. 

“Y/N why are you getting that stuff on? I promise you I didn’t regret it! Baby” Rob tried to stop you from leaving the room but you pushed past him and went down the stairs where Marnie was sitting on the couch with a smug smile on her lips.

You opened the front door and slammed it behind you, grabbing the keys from your bag and getting in the car. 

Rob tried to get in, begging you not to leave. You hadn’t been to Missouri before. He didn’t want you getting lost. 

“Go away! I-i need a break!” You wiped your tears away quickly and drove out of his driveway, leaving Rob, who was a mess of tears, behind.

You didn’t know where you were going to go, but you needed to get away from him. Away from it all.

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