#you will never be part of my mind palace people who think otherwise

[fishareglorious]

every time i call hofmann old and someone comes up to me and goes "erm 🤓☝️ actually she's 38 from the official merch and that's not old" i know. i fucking know. but have you considered my mind palace is what the paradise blue epoch thinks they are. that woman is pushing fifty to ME.

[beautifulpaprika]

The Island Castle; Jungkook

pairing: queen!f!reader x life-keeper?!jk

summary: The castle on the small island behind yours has been sitting there since before you were born, but you've never known what was in it. Everyone tells you there are monsters, but you have yet to see any. When you set out to uncover that mystery you find someone who explains everything and makes you feel everything.

warnings!: shower sex, unprotected, a storm!

word count: 7.7k

a/n: Someone else edited this picture! I got it from here (Pinterest)! On with the story!

“Your majesty?” Alana’s voice calls behind me. I turn to her, tea in hand.

“Alana, I thought I told you mornings are for staring and relaxing time,” I chuckle, looking back across the small body of water to the multi-storied castle sitting on a small island, only slightly different than our Castle Maine. 

“YourMajesty,” she sighs, “you need to erase that castle from your mind, focus on the people who are focused on you,” she advises while taking a seat next to me. 

“I am a face for the people, it’s not as if I actually do anything in government, we both know that. I bet the people don’t even know about it.” The castle, Castle Island as I like to call it, was hidden behind our own castle, Castle Maine as I like to call it, with such tall walls of rock and waterfalls here and there. The cove was beautiful but it held too much mystery. My advisers, my parents (may they rest in peace), the servants- they all ask me “Why are you so curious about that place and what’s in it?” and the answer is simple: because I was told not to be curious about it. 

It had been there before I was born, and all I’ve been wanting is to see what’s inside. 

“Sometimes it’s better for Queens to keep their secrets,” Alana pulls me out of my thoughts.

“I know I’ve asked you many times Alana,” I look into her starting-to-wrinkle face, “but are you sure you know nothing of what’s in there?” I gesture to the silent castle with my teacup.

“No, your majesty. When I started to work here I was told many stories of ghouls and ghosts. Even a man-eating man,” she shivers. “It’s best not to wonder, otherwise, you’ll get a headache.”

“Sounds like you know from experience,” I tell her, going back to looking at the castle. There’s a terrace on the front, but not a soul comes out onto it. No royalty, no servant, nothing. 

“We need to get you ready soon,” Alana pushes her chair back in standing, “Suitors are waiting,” she squeals. I roll my eyes. 

I need to know what’s in the castle across the waters before I’ marry another royal who thinks they can stop me from going. 

***

When I was six, I discovered a boat along the coast of Castle Maine, however, when I dragged my nannies to the same spot, they said they could not see any boat. 

It was disappointing and made me believe I was losing my sanity for a few months, but I kept seeing this boat. Even now. There is no evidence to suggest that it was not meant for me to explore with. 

So, tonight I’m finally taking the small row boat across the waters. There was always a voice that said I should wait, but the voice is quiet now, my own invitation to the quiet, golden palace. The only thing lighting the way is the moon when I hop into the boat, paddling my way across. 

“This is a lot tougher than I thought,” I murmur, my muscles aching from the strength going into moving. I look back at Castle Maine, the lights littering different parts, then I look forward to Castle Island. 

Complete darkness. The air feels cold, the sound of something splashing off to my right. Maybe it’s best if I turn around. Back to light. Back to humans and not ghouls, ghosts, or man-eating men. 

Then I think about the men waiting for me on Castle Maine. The suitors who want to take over the kingdom. Lord Alloy has been especially annoying today. There’s no fun in going back to it. 

I realize I am already halfway out into the waters and that turning back would make me a failure. 

“My best advice? Something you should never do as queen? Never. Go. To that island,” my mother’s face haunts me. It’s pathetic of me to go against her dying wishes, but I keep rowing. Castle Island is much bigger from the shore than from the high balcony in my bedroom. Now I can see that it most likely has not been cleaned in decades, the walls are painted in water mold. 

I reach the shore, grabbing the lantern from the boat, not shining it yet so as not to alert anyone. There are steps leading up to the door, inviting me in. 

Adrenaline pumps through me, and it’s enough to keep me going. The door’s creak is louder than any thought passing through my brain. I’m greeted with darkness and the sounds of floorboards creaking. My lantern moves from left to right, shining onto trinkets and wall decorations. Paintings litter the walls framed in gold. The place does not look so abandoned from the inside. 

A skittering noise whips my head to stare down the end of the seemingly endless hall. 

Just a rat. 

“Calm down,” I whisper to my heart, “It’s only a small rodent. It won’t hurt us,” I laugh to myself. 

“Unless you hurt it,” a voice whispers behind me. 

I scream, whipping around in a panic. My panic doesn’t rest when I see there’s no one there. The words were right in my ear, how is it possible that there is no one there? 

Footsteps to my left. I flash the spot. There is no one there. 

Footsteps to my right. I flash that spot. Nothing. 

“Come inside,” the voice whispers from above and fades ahead. 

My breathing picks up, but I don’t want to leave without answers. 

“Come on,” the voice is deep but playful. There’s a slight shadow moving with me, then ahead of me. I flash light on it, watching a vine with flowers spiral ahead, showing me the path. “I’m waiting for you, your majesty,” the voice whispers. I run after the vine as it grows faster. I wind through halls and large rooms, not paying attention to any of it. 

The vine stops in an open, what looks to be, ballroom. 

“Welcome!” the same voice yells out. It’s dark for a moment longer, then candles and torches light the entire room. 

I gasp at the flowers growing up the sides and consuming the ceiling, the moonlight shining through the large windows. There is gold holding flames, speckled on the ground, and on the curtains on the stage where a man sits on the edge. 

“Hi,” he grins, like a predator to his prey. I can’t bring myself to say anything to him. He’s ethereal. He’s what they would describe angels to look like. His white, long hair matches the white I can spot in his eyes despite standing 30 feet away. He’s got a boyish grin on his face, piercings in his ears, and clothes that are also white. If it weren’t for the unnatural colored eyes and hair, he would look like any person I would see in the streets. 

“Who are you?” I ask. I realize it’s rude to greet him that way and immediately apologize, “I’ve been staring into this castle for years and I’ve never seen you.” 

He shrugs it off and hops down from the stage. 

“Maybe you weren’t looking hard enough,” he suggests. It’s a suggestion that irritates me considering I’ve been looking plenty hard enough. “Funny, that you’re asking the questions when you’ve broken into my home,” he moves to one of the flower walls, caressing the petals of a pink one. 

“Yes, I apologize,” my eyes fall to the floor in embarrassment. It was foolish of me to think no one lived here. “This castle has been dormant ever since I was born. There have been no boats coming or going from this place, and you’re hidden in a cove behind my own castle,” I try explaining. However, he rolls his eyes at all of it. It’s clear the explanation was not worth it. 

“You don’t truly think that story is going to work on me, do you?” he asks.

Confusion sets in and my eyebrows pinch together. “It’s not a story, it’s the truth.” He laughs at my words, and I don’t think I’ve ever felt so insulted. 

“You’re the queen, and allegedly no one has told you a single story about me?” he laughs again. “That’s very believable, your majesty, but I’m not an idiot,” he plucks the flower off of the vine and crushes it between his fingers. “What’s the real reason you’re here?'' His steps are heavy as he approaches me. I don’t dare to move from the spot. His face hovers over mine and I can't help the gulp. 

“I’m telling the truth,” I say again, looking into his eyes. “I’ve never seen or heard of you.”

The ballroom is silent for a few moments, his eyes narrow. 

“Are you-” I hesitate, “Are you the man-eating man?” I whisper. He blinks then scoffs, before a laugh escapes him.

“So nothing then?” his body is still so close to mine and it’s becoming difficult to breathe. “Let me explain it then,” he moves to the stage. The plants on the wall crawl over to the stage and I gasp when one wraps around my middle, pulling me to him. 

“What the-” his arms wrap around my middle, pulling me closer to him. My mouth closes, afraid to breathe into his mouth. 

“Pay close attention, Your Majesty,” my heart pace picks up as I follow his eyes to the plants on the stage. “And listen closely.” 

They form a shape that looks like a king on a throne and the other figure that represents the man standing next to me. 

“More than a century ago, I was invited to Castle Maine-”

I flinch. How does he know I call it “Castle Maine”? And a century ago? How is that possible?

“I was invited there on the premise of needing help with the crops and the nature of the kingdom,” the plants change to the king kneeling before him rather than the other way around. “They were desperate,” he turns to me, “I should’ve left them to die,” the smile wipes from his face now. 

The image changes to him raising his hands over the ground, crops rising up.

“But I was put on this earth to sustain life, and that’s what I did,” as he talks, more and more questions appear in my head. “The king was, as expected, very grateful,” the scene changes back to the throne room, the king bowing his head slightly. Then a vine wraps around the white-haired man’s middle, pulling him back and out of frame. 

“He wanted more,” his fingers squeeze into my side, “But the oh-so wonderful-king justified his actions to his kingdom,” the Castle Island appears in forms of many flowers and vines, “‘The ‘Life-Keeper’ has been gifted a large castle where he wants to reside until we need his assistance again,’ are the words he used in his speech. That witch he was married to put a spell on this castle, trapping me in it forever. The royals would be the only ones who could 

Take me off of the island when they needed something,” his eyes lock onto the scene of him on his knees, wrapped in rope and vines.

“You couldn’t escape when you got off the island?” I ask. 

“They realized that too,” he laughs. “Ever since I’ve been trapped here, I’ve never been taken out for fear of killing everything they had instead, or spreading the truth that the royal family are selfish and greedy!” he looks straight into my eyes when he says it. 

The vines release me, and I don’t feel any lighter from the information just fed to me. 

Memories of my parents who have told me time and time again not to go or even wonder about the castle. Meanwhile, we’ve been holding the gatekeeper of life hostage. 

“There’s a reason there’s so much life around your castle,” he tells me, I think of the cove and beyond and how full of life it is compared to other kingdoms. “I can’t hold all of it inside me. So if I go, all of it does too,” he reveals. A gasp leaves my mouth at the thought of losing all of it. How would I explain to the people that the reason they aren't starving has just left. 

“Why would you tell me this? I thought you wanted to escape.”

“I’ll never do what your family did to me,” he looks away now to the flowers crumbled on the stage floor. 

“I have to think,” I rush out. Castle Island has become a suffocating space and I can’t form my questions properly. “I need to return. Everyone will wonder where I am,” I make my way to the exit and he doesn’t stop me. Surprise enters my body but he did say that he would not do to me what my family has done to him, i.e. taking someone hostage. 

“Do you know the way out?” he calls. I pause in my tracks because, no, I can’t recall a single room that I saw on the way here. 

He sighs behind me, a vine leading out of the door.

I look back to him before I leave and say, “I’ll be back tomorrow, I promise.” His eyes narrow, skeptical. “Who will I be visiting when I return?” 

“Jungkook,” he tells me his name. 

“Thank you, Jungkook,” and bow to him, a flash of surprise painting his face. 

I follow the vine back home. 

***

Lord Alloy has invited me to a picnic on the shore in the back of the castle. The same shore that faces Castle Island. I had initially wanted to skip it, but the idea of possibly seeing Jungkook somewhere lurking excites me. 

The sand gets all over my dress as we sit down together. He pulls out a basket, slowly revealing all the food he packed. 

My eyes wander to the quiet castle across the water. 

“I’m sure you know why I’ve invited you to be here,” he says, pouring two glasses of wine, setting one next to me. I try not to roll my eyes at the tone as if he has control over me. 

“I can guess,” I say, a smile plastering my face. 

“Now,” he takes a sip, “I am aware there are many suitors at your beck and call ready to take the throne beside you,” I want to scoff again at his choice of words ‘take the throne’. No one will be taking it from me, I’ll be granting them access.

But . . . semantics.

“I know you’re considering many options,” I’m not, “and I wanted to meet with you, hoping you might consider me as one of your top options,” he takes another sip. “There are quite a few benefits if you and I were to unite. . .” he rambles on, but my ears are already tuning out when I spot a moving figure in the second story window of Castle Island. 

A curtain moves in the window beside it and a white head pops out, watching. If I hadn’t known now what to look for, I would’ve never seen Jungkook snooping. 

I don’t know what comes over me when my posture instantly corrects, my eyes relaxing to fluttering lashes, and the tense feeling in my shoulders washing away to relaxation. I’d have never thought of the possibility of him watching me, but now his gaze is all I can feel despite him being so far. 

“Financially, I don’t believe there’s anything to worry about- eh. Your majesty?” Lord Alloy’s voice calls me back to attention.

“Forgive me, Lord Alloy, but I think there will have to be more than financial stability to convince me of marriage,” my eyes stay on Castle Island. Jungkook shows his full figure now through the window. 

Is it odd that I feel safer knowing he’s watching me while I’m in this meeting. I certainly trust him more than I trust Alloy. 

***

Despite my muscles aching from rowing the night before, I keep my promise to go visit Jungkook. 

I’ve gone over a script more times than I can count throughout the day, preparing myself for any answers. I wanted to find the truth yesterday and I received about half. Now my curiosity is hungry for more. 

Alana has been noticing something strange the past 24 hours asking, “You haven’t drank your tea. Do you have a headache? A stomachache?” when I told her “no” she gave me a strange look. 

I know she’s suspicious of me now but that isn’t stopping me either. 

I feel giddy when there’s a vine that sprouts from the ground when I arrive. I bring my lantern and the bag of food I brought with me out of the boat and inside the beige palace. 

It takes me left, right, left to a room that simply takes my breath away. A large swimming pool sits in the middle, while flower walls climb up the sides to a glass ceiling where I can spot almost every star. It’s unlike anything I’ve seen before. 

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” I jump at the whisper in my ear. I turn to face Jungkook whose head is tilted. “You’re obviously going to bombard me with questions today. It would be kind of me for us to at least have a chat in a comfortable place rather than sitting on the ballroom floor.” 

I’m already put off by the fact he knows I’ve come to mainly interrogate him. 

“What’s this?” he points to the bag. 

“Oh!” I set the bag on a table near me framed in gold, “I’ve come to the conclusion that because you have been trapped here in this castle with no one coming in or out,” I start to pull out pastries, fruit, and cheese from the bag, “you must have not tasted food in ages.” 

He scoffs. 

“Your majesty, I have no need for food. I’m a gatekeeper of life. I can also grow food,” he explains. Humiliation rises in me for not thinking of that, my cheeks burn, most likely causing a deep red. He sees this and his smile slowly drops. “But I appreciate the gesture,” he grabs a piece of cheese, biting into it with fervor. 

I raise an eyebrow at him. 

“Cheese isn’t grown,” he defends. I snort a bit, then quickly cover my mouth. 

He drops it onto the table, rolling his eyes.

“I didn’t mean to offend you-”

“Enough,” he puts his hand in my face and I yank it down.

“I’m a Queen, sir! And a lady nonetheless! Your hand in my face will do you no favors,” I tell him. “There are many things I can tolerate, but I’ve been trying to show kindness, so I beg of you- no hands in my face,” he only blinks at my words then laughs. 

“I like you, Queen! You’ve got a bit of spunk I haven’t seen in the royal family in quite a bit. Granted, not many have ever visited me, but you’re refreshing.” He doesn’t know how much his words affect me. To be compared to the other members but as a compliment has not been something I’ve experienced much. 

“I saw you,” he munches on more cheese, “today with that man on the shore,” his tongue pokes his cheek before taking another piece. “Who was he?” he doesn’t make eye contact as he grills me. It pushes me to wonder why he wants to know. 

“That was one of my so-called ‘suitors’, the name is ironic seeing as he doesn’t suit me very much,” I tell him. His eyes glide to me from underneath his eyelashes, scanning my body, then focusing back on the foods I’ve brought. 

“Are you going to marry him?” 

“No. He’s never caught my interest. Especially, because he thinks he can take charge so easily if he were to marry me. While it would have been nice to humble him, marriage is a bit too permanent,” I explain. The plate of cheese is gone before I know it. 

Jungkook seems . . . relieved? His shoulders are a lot less tense than before, and that smirk from yesterday paints his face yet again. 

He turns to the pool and starts to slip his shirt off. 

I panic and turn away from him.

“A warning would have been nice!” I yell out, still turning away. A deep chuckle escapes him. 

“We’re going swimming, what did you expect?” 

“I’ve never seen a man shirtless,” I admit. It’s not embarrassing to admit. Everyone around me knows I’ve been sheltered by my parents inside Castle Maine my whole life. 

“It won’t kill you. I won’t judge you either,” he says, before I hear a big splash! Sprinkles of water fall onto my arm, making me gasp. I turn back around to see Jungkook swimming away under the water. He swims to one side, comes up for air, then swims back, and comes back up, his arms resting on the side of the pool. 

“You want me to ask questions while you’re like this?” 

“You could join me,” he suggests, a smirk painting his face. 

“In my dress?” I scoff. 

“Don’t be silly. Without the dress,” he says it very nonchalantly, but my heart drops into my stomach, the feeling of something new being foreign to me. “You don’t have to act like a queen here. It’s not like I can tell anyone but the plants around me,” he floats backwards. As sad as his words are, they are true. 

I debate with myself for a few moments, and eventually feel that it would be nice to swim after the hot summer days we’ve been having. It’s also a way to show this Life-keeper that I’m willing to do what he wants in exchange for more information. 

The dress starts to come off. I try to ignore his burning gaze on me. I feel the heat rising through my body, but push it down. It’s only swimming. My undergarments are exposed now when the dress pools at my feet. I throw my shoes off, then look at the waters. The adrenaline pumps through me at the thought of Jungkook watching me and I jump in. 

The water consumes me. My arms fling around.

I don’t know how to swim. 

How could I forget I don’t know how to swim? 

My arms search for solace, but there is none. The air is leaving me.

Finally, a hand grabs my wrist and pulls me up. Air finally reaches my lungs, but there’s still so much water. I cough up water, Jungkook placing a hand on my cheek at the same time. 

“Shh,” he soothes me, and I feel clean air filling my body. My arms wrap around his neck.

Life. 

“You know you’re supposed to know how to swim before getting in a pool, right?” 

“I wasn’t aware,” I tell him with a hint of sarcasm. “I was blinded by the adrenaline. I’d never been swimming before,” I still cling to him like the life line he served for me earlier. 

“They really haven’t let you do anything, have they?”

“My job was to be a Queen. Not to compete in the summer olympics,” he laughs at that. I start to relax, my hands still on him, but he floats around easily. “Now you know something about me. I’d like to ask about you now,” he nods, fully expecting this. “You said ‘more than a century ago’ last night. You don’t look older than 25 years.”

“Not even 20 years? I’m insulted,” I give him a look, “I’m the keeper of life, Your Majesty, that includes myself,” it makes sense now that he says it. I suppose gods don’t die, so why would he? 

“How old are you truly?”

“It’s rude to ask a lady her age,” he teases. I roll my eyes. 

“Fine, next question,” he pulls me closer when he changes directions, and I try not to focus on our hips aligning so well. He could enter me- 

“You’re taking a minute to think of that next one,” he says. My mouth opens up, but closes again. It’s hard to focus. I’ve been on several dates with past suitors waiting for their chance to be King, but nothing can compare to what’s happening in my stomach and the thoughts wanting to take over my brain. 

“Um, well, you called the castle I live in “Castle Maine”, but as far as I know, I’m the only one who calls it that,” I explain. 

“You wrote a letter and sent it here. Do you remember?” 

I recall when my mother died and I was about to become queen. When my mother made that dying wish, I tried to give up on Castle Island. I sent a letter apologizing that I had to give up on it. 

“‘You’re a dream that I’m not allowed to wish on anymore. Signed, Castle Maine.’ That’s what you wrote,” he says, his voice is low as if the memory is one that hurts him. I watch his eyes avoid mine and my heart sinks. 

“Obviously, I lied. I couldn’t get this place out of my head. Did you know they say there are ghouls and ghosts here? A man-eating man?” he laughs at that. 

“A natural tactic to keep others out of course,” his eyes come back to land on mine, “and yet here you are.” 

“Here I am,” I echo. His eyes fall down to my lips, simultaneously licking his own. My heart picks up speed but not before I bring myself back to why I’m truly here. 

“If I were to help you get out, what would happen?” his eyes rise again. 

“The life around the kingdom, of course, won’t be flourishing as much as it is now. The cove will not be growing as many flowers. Your castle may fall apart-”

“Wait, what?” 

“Castle Maine is rooted down by plants that I’ve grown. It won’t fall all the way apart, but the damages would be unsafe to live in,” he explains. My mind is reeling from even more information. “This castle is one big hold of my power, and it spreads out. Think of it as a tree and its roots are spreading out,” his power and how important he is to the kingdom is prevalent now. 

“I see.” Jungkook must notice my uneasiness as he swims to the steps of the pool, setting me down so my feet touch the steps. I climb out, the water falling from my body back into the water. He follows behind me. I reach for my dress, still sitting on the ground. 

Jungkook grabs my wrist, stopping me.

“It’s midnight, and that dress looks expensive to be washed with pool water,” a vine creeps into the room holding clothing on a plate - a simple shirt that looks like it will reach down to my knees. I take it with careful moves, imagining the vine trapping me if I make one wrong move. “It’s very late. There’s a storm that might be coming. We have plenty of rooms here in the castle and you can return home in the morning.”

I’m about to reject the offer, but he’s already making an escape. Alana will have to worry about me for a few minutes in the morning. 

***

I doubted Jungkook when he said there would be a big storm, but the thunder and lightning are evidence of no lie. 

I can’t sleep. Every loud boom! yanks me out of sleep. 

I get up, holding my lantern in hand. My mission now is to try and find the kitchen for a glass of water. There is no vine to lead the way this time, but it’s a chance to explore the place. I find a room full of paintings. I explore the canvases, some of them painted over many times. 

I continue on, finding other bedrooms, until finally, there’s the kitchen. His is much bigger than mine, but it’s more empty. There are hardly any plates or cups in the cabinet, but if I think about it, there was never a need for him. He was all by himself. 

“Can’t sleep?” Jungkook appears behind me. 

“The storm really isn’t letting up,” I explain. “I just needed something to do,” I peek into his fridge, filled with lots of fruits and vegetables. He wasn’t joking when he said it’s what he could grow. 

“I’m not a big fan of them either. There was a fire here,” my attention is off of the midnight snack now. “Lightning struck and I had to take care of it myself. It wasn’t big by any means, but it makes me paranoid to this day,” he explains. 

“I’m sorry.” I’m not sure what else to say to that. There’s a guilt that the king who put him in this eternal loneliness had his blood running through me. I can’t help but feel responsible despite not being alive at the time. 

“Nothing you could have done,” he says, but it doesn’t help the sinking feeling. Lightning strikes, and thunder shakes the room, I flinch back and frustration consumes me. Typically, a storm is over after a few minutes, but this is enough to wash a house away.

Then realization hits. The boat!

“I need a path to the exit!” I call out. He calls my name, but I’m already running, following a vine slithering up and down the wall. When I reach the outside, the boat is just barely hanging onto the shore. 

It’s my only way back to the castle.

I’m drenched when I reach the shore, the rain making my clothes heavier on me. I step into the water and try lifting the boat, but the water keeps pulling it back. 

“Hold on!” Jungkook calls, he joins me on the other side, “On the count of three! Three, two, one!” We both heave the boat onto the shore, the bottom scraping the sand until at least 90% is hitting land. 

When it feels secure, we run back up the stairs and inside, our breaths heaving. 

“Thank you,” I say, relieved that I thought about it on time. I turn to him, preparing to give gratitude with eye contact but his eyes aren’t focusing on mine, they’re a bit lower to the white shirt that is soaking in water and sticking to my skin.

I would feel completely embarrassed if it weren’t for the fact that now my eyes were traveling to the shirt sticking to his skin. A perfect outline of his chest and abdomen peeking out. Saliva almost spills from my mouth, but not before I pick my jaw back up and meet his eyes again. He looks just as embarrassed as I feel. 

“I recommend we change clothing,” I tell him. He visibly gulps, causing a wave of nerves to run through me. 

“I have a few spares in the bedroom,” he says, a bright smile on his face. I can’t help but to wonder why he didn’t send one of his plants to his room to get it. 

Thunder sounds from outside, and I hasten my steps after him. My eyes stay on his back muscles as they move through the halls. If you were to ask me what rooms we were walking through, I wouldn’t know how to respond. My fingers tingle to run them through his pale hair. 

Walking into his bedroom is not what I was expecting. Considering he is the only person who lives here, I expected his room to be the biggest and most decorated space. It’s the size of my biggest bathroom in Castle Maine. 

“Don’t look too disappointed,” he interrupts my thoughts, chuckling at his dresser where he takes a few pieces of clothing out. “The shower’s right-” he stops, the clothes are immediately placed on his bed and I take a step back when he approaches me quickly. I startle when he grabs my arm. “Where did this come from?” 

I look to my arm where a large gash runs down my arm. I hadn’t even felt it, but now there’s blood dripping down to my fingers.

“It must have been from dragging that boat up,” I explain. 

He doesn’t say another word, instead dragging me to his bathroom.

“Sit on the counter,” he demands pointing to the wood before crouching to look in his cabinets. His tone is a shot to my core. 

“Jungkook, I don’t think-”

“Now,” he interrupts. I blink once. Twice- then move to lift myself onto the counter. It doesn't take long for him to conjure up some bandages and set them beside me. “I’d prefer my queen not be harmed while she’s here,” he whispers, a smirk on his face. I’m shocked that he isn’t calling me ‘Your Majesty’ anymore. ‘My queen’? I like that a lot more. 

“So, has your perception changed of the royal family then?” 

“Not at all. I still think most have been the most selfish beings to ever walk the planet earth,” he says, dumping water on my wound. I scowl at him. “Chin up. I said ‘most’,” he taps the bottom of my chin. 

I try resisting the smile surfacing. 

“However, I could be being manipulated by your beauty. It’s easy to fall into you,” he doesn’t even glance up to watch my reaction. In a way, I’m glad he doesn’t, it’s a full face of pure shock. “The shirt doesn’t help,” he expresses. 

“Jungkook! Who knew you could be so bold?”

“Have I not always been bold?” his hands are gentle as they slide up and down my arm. 

“Jungkook?” I try grabbing his attention again, but he’s still examining my wound. 

“The rain water can’t be good for it, we need to get you in the shower,” his voice is low. He said ‘we’? I imagine the water running down his front, his body glistening as he takes care of me. My brain flashes images before I can stop it and there’s a different wetness between my thighs that isn’t a result of rain water. 

“Are you going to help me?” I ask. His head doesn’t move, but his eyes do, looking up at me. I suck in air, waiting with bated breath. “Usually there are people in Castle Maine who help me,” I lie. Every rational thought has officially flown out of my mind, the only thought in my head is him in the shower with me. 

He scoffs instead. 

“And do you want me to think of you as a queen when I help you?” he asks, now his hands are planted on each side of me, palms face-down on the counter as he leans his body in. I shiver when his breath hits my face. There’s an itch on my neck where I want him to place his lips.

I shake my head ‘no’. “I want you to think of me as a woman,” my fingers have a mind of their own when they slowly caress the skin where his shoulder and neck meet, sliding up to the wet tendrils of his hair. His eyes slightly close at the contact, leaning into the touch. 

“It’s been a long time since anyone has touched me. I hope you understand that what you’re starting would be very cruel to stop,” he whispers. I can’t bear to think of how long it has been for him without contact with another person, but it’s comforting to know that he might be out of experience just like me. 

“I didn’t plan on stopping,” my fingers hide under his hair, massaging his scalp, he leans into it with a moan. When he recovers, his hands slide over my thighs, moving them apart and standing between my legs. A rush of nerves and excitement courses through me as he stands there, his hands roaming, touching, groping. I’ve felt hands on my legs and body before, but not in this manner, not this boldly. The touches before were shy and cautious because I am queen. But Jungkook doesn’t seem to want to waste any more time. It’s as addicting as they say. 

“Let’s get ready for your shower, then,” I feel a tug on the shirt still stuck to my skin. His eyes trail down. I feel the heat of his eyes moving up, left, right, down. 

I raise my arms up. 

“Go ahead,” I say, letting him do it. The cold air is even colder when the shirt is lifted off of me, the water not helping me stay warm by any means. I hear him mumble something when it comes all the way off. My chest is bare and in the open now, my nipples hard when exposed. 

He throws the shirt off to the side with a plop somewhere. 

“Y/N, if you don’t know this already, you are one of the most beautiful women I’ve laid my eyes on. And I’ve lived a long time,” he leans closer, lips hovering over my neck. I try not to pull him in and come off as needy already. It’s something I want to take more time with. 

A peck is what he gives me. Just one on my collarbone, then two, then three. 

“Jungkook,” I whine, impatient. 

He comes up, meeting my eyes, and drags my legs forward, forcing our hips to meet. I can feel the result of our touches between his legs and curving up to his stomach. 

He’s about to say something, but I can’t take anymore of this talking when he’s right in front of me. I take the opportunity, planting my mouth on his, my breasts pressed up against his chest when both of my arms stretch over his shoulders. 

He doesn’t respond at first, but it quickly changes, his hands roaming to my butt and pulling me even closer, his hips grinding into me. Finally, some friction. He groans into my mouth. 

“I need you, right now,” his hands come off of me, removing his shirt and pants and throwing it the same direction as mine. I try not to faint at his body fully uncovered. Not because I’m horrified, but because he looks just as expected when it comes to how they describe immortals to be built. Perfect. 

“You can have me,” I whisper into his mouth, his face already looking as if we’d just finished when we haven’t even begun. When I kiss him again, the heat from his chest spreads onto mine, our skin rubbing against each other. 

The same heat is gone when he turns to go turn the shower on. I sit on the counter needy and half-naked. I watch him moving and bending, his muscles contorting when he reaches me again. 

He lifts me easily, setting me on the floor. Without warning, he pulls my underwear down, but he doesn’t come back up. Instead, his fingers are gentle on my calves, sliding upwards. 

“Jungkook,” I breathe. His nose and lips graze my thighs. It’s hard to concentrate on anything when his face is so close to being in-between my legs. 

“Before you leave,” he says, the words vibrating against my thigh, “Grant me at least this one wish,” he pulls me closer. At this point I’ll give him anything he wants. The castle, the throne, me. He lifts my leg over his shoulder. “Let me taste you.” 

I don’t get much of a chance to respond before his mouth is already on me and my hands are grabbing onto the edge of the counter for dear life. The shower runs in the background, but I can’t help the moan that releases, overpowering the water. 

His tongue moves and sucks. Where? It doesn’t matter when I feel a finger slip in. I’d like to think that I would be warned about what’s going to happen next, but the surprise sends more adrenaline in my veins. 

He groans, the vibrations traveling through me. He lifts himself from the ground, dropping my knee. The bottom of his face glistens from his personal feast, he doesn’t say anything, but I feel the warmth from his hand move into my hair, pulling me towards him. 

“I want you to taste yourself,” his voice is a whisper. His lips press into mine and I indulge him. The kiss is messy, and it gets even messier when he begins to move us. 

I break from him, moving to get on my knees, but he pulls my arms back up, shaking his head.

“What is it?”

“You don’t have to do that. Trust me, if you do, I won’t last very long.” 

He turns me around, my butt on his hard-on. The moment is still and silent. 

“Jungkook?” I call for him while his nose runs up and down my throat. “Are you okay?” I run my hand through his hair. 

“More than okay. I’m trying not to rush this.” Our bodies are sticky with sweat and rain water. I’m able to break away and keep his hand in mine when I get in the shower. The water feels amazing against my skin, but Jungkook feels better. “Don’t leave in the morning,” he pleads, holding my face in both of his hands. 

“The thought never crossed my mind,” I tell him against his lips. 

I thought it would feel strange to have a man’s naked body against mine, but it’s much more comfortable because it’s with him. 

Our mouths mend together for a few more moments before his hands move down. I’m nervous about what he wants, a possible slipping happening. However, when I take the leap and jump to wrap my legs around him, he shows no struggle- the perks of practically being a god. 

“I don’t think I can wait much longer, Jungkook,” I whine, my back on the cold wall. 

“As you wish, my queen,” I hold onto his shoulders when he separates us. I decide not to watch, looking up when his penis enters me. It’s painful for a moment. The cry in my throat on lockdown for fear of embarrassing myself. 

He looks at me, his eyelids hooding those white eyes. I nod, a signal that I’m ready. His movements are slow first. 

I notice the vines creeping up the walls and the flowers blossoming. They cover the shower, turning it into a dome of flowers with only the two of us in it. 

Our moans and groans mix and echo and bounce off of the walls of plants. 

“I don’t know how much longer-” he whines into my neck, grabbing onto my left breast, then sliding down to rub circles on my clit. I feel a buildup in my stomach.

“I won’t last- ah!” I moan. His ministrations and thrusts are getting faster. I can’t stop the wave that crashes into me and I grab onto his hair, scratching my nails down his scalp as he groans onto my collar bone while filling me up. 

He sets me down, but we’re in the same position while the shower runs down our skin- the sweat and fluids washing away. 

My eyes open and I gasp at the colors on his arms. 

“Jungkook!” There are drawing patterns encircling his arm, all the way up to his shoulder where I have to blink twice to make sure I’m looking correctly. His hair is black now, and his eyes are dark. The color in his skin no longer looks flushed and pale. 

And the drawings! 

“How- What-” I stutter. 

“I’ve got some of my life back.” 

***

The rain goes on, but the lightning has slowly dialed down since our escapade in the shower. 

I can’t stop looking at this new Jungkook. He was always more handsome than anyone I’d ever met, but the new look makes him more handsome than even my wildest dreams can conjure. 

I look up at him, tracing my fingers on the black ink running up his arm at the same time he’s rubbing my neck. He looks blissful, on a high. 

“I’d like to take you out of this castle,” I propose. His head whips to look at me and his back rubbing stops. 

“Say that again?”

I sit up, making sure he can read my lips when I say “I want to take you out of this castle. A royal has to do it, right?” He nods slowly, still skeptical. “I don’t want the kingdom to fall apart, Jungkook, but if I had stayed in this castle by myself for as long as you have?” I shake my head, not wanting to think about it. “I came here looking for an answer, and I found much more than that. And what you do with your freedom is not my business, you don't ever have to see me again,” he raises a hand in the air sitting up.

“That's not going to happen,” he tells me, placing the same hand on my face, a thumb on my cheek. 

““I’m saying to keep it in your back pocket. If I were to take you out of here, I wouldn’t want you to feel trapped in another space.”

“We don’t have to,” he proposes. I raise an eyebrow. “If you travel with me, we’ll come back often and I’ll grow the crops for your kingdom, I’ll do anything. Just go with me so I won’t have to be alone again,” the fire shines on his face, helping me scan for any insincerity. 

I think on the offer, not wanting to abandon my duties as a queen, but they certainly won’t miss me either. 

“You don’t have to say yes, but I would be elated if you did. I'll teach you how to swim, I'll show you things you never thought you could see. You won't be trapped anymore,” he continues. I stare at his newly dark hair and eyes, thinking. I suppose I am more similar to him than I thought.

“And we’ll come back every few days? How?”

“I’m the gate-keeper of life,” he laughs. I laugh with him, falling back onto the mattress. 

“I’ll go with you,” I tell him. 

“Anywhere?” he asks, laying back down beside me. 

“Maybe not back here,” I laugh. He agrees and kisses me on the forehead. 

“You think we could trap that Alloy in here?” he whispers, and I laugh before falling into a sleep surrounded by warmth. 

[molter-writes]

- I see Richard II as an opener, and I’m pouring myself a stiff one because we’re starting by setting the thermostat at insane.

- fuck, the timing of the pregnancy just hit with the “we’ll have to relocate to the palace soon.” The fact that they both decided to have a family before they knew Rhaenyra would be saddled with the crown is really devastating.

- of course baby Daeron has baby silver curls like the widdle renaissance angel he is, of course

- (Married woman, taken woman, wanted woman.)

(Loved woman, cherished woman, someone’s woman.)

Safe woman.

Okay but the way you encapsulate canon Alicent’s deep desire to conform to the kind of doe-eyed womanhood her society expects of her, and at the same time somehow make it wholesome? This should be illegal. It’s definitely some sort of dangerous mind-altering witchcraft. Please never work in government. Or, you know, given the givens, do.

-okay so minor detail but I do love the constant of Rhaenyra’s Home Renovation Antics in The Molterverse™️

-“anything not making intuitive sense to me must be ipso-facto preposterous” okay but the way I HOLLERED, because *yes, absolutely Rhaenyra* but also me, because of course I’m soooo smart 😂🙄

-Secretary of State for Defence, the Rt. Hon. Jason Lannister, Earl of Lincoln.—Well, pack your bags everyone, country’s *fucked*

-I think it’s quite inspired to show how Alicent’s satisfaction at being a *good* caretaker (while of course done out of love and duty both canonically and here) is in large part due to the sense of control and power that she derives from the act. She times the medicine, she presides over Rhaenyra’s recovery, she finally has all of Rhaenyra’s time and attention again in some capacity—and fuck the engagements and country and staff. Possibly in that order.

- Can I say, one of the things I’m really enjoying about this story is the…diegetic? Way you’ve incorporated the news as organism and organization giving voice to The People in counterpoint to the Crown, much like Alicent just wants to go back to being a normal person and Rhaenyra is slowly consumed by the shackles of the throne.

- Her fingers making Michelangelo indents on Rhaenyra’s skin—oh we’re pulling out the art history? We’re bringing out the big guns? It’s going to be like that? Alright. Talk dirty to me.

- “a donkey trot to Valhalla” her poor cervix (she’s loving it), I don’t think I’ve laughed this much at a 5 word sentence IN MY LIFE. Valhalla is correct because I AM BATTLING DEMONS HERE AND THEYRE WINNING

- Also it should go without saying, but sometimes it’s nice to hear it, so: HOT

- OH MY FUCKING GOD, is Alicent totally masterminding the absolute fucking tanking of this fucking tour? WE LOVE TO SEE IT.

- Oh god, the way Rhaenyra just needs Alicent to believe she can be a good Prince of Dragonstone, the way Alicent just needs Rhaenyra to leave it all behind and pay attention only to her and their baby, the way THEYRE THE ONES WHO SHOULD BE GOING TO SPEECH THERAPY BECAUSE THEY CANT FUCKING COMMUNICATE. 🥺😫😤😍😍😍

- “I’m sorry that you still live with bread, Rhaenyra.” Her voice wavers. “Feel want. Taste grief. I don’t find it pathetic at all. I love the mortal bones of you, Rhaenyra.” She opens the door, then, to the light. “But I know how badly you’d wish it otherwise.”

Praying and hoping and begging that Ryan Condal and Sarah Hess read this before season 3. Behold, a perfect thesis statement.

-“He’s done the work for us tonight, hasn’t he,” she croons. “Give him his due.”

fuck Rhaenyra is going to *murder her* when she realizes how beautifully she’s been played.

-Rhaenyra stares back at it. Her lips are wet. “Gods,” she murmurs. Turns it in the light. “That really is a beautiful green.”

Yes drink the poison, Rhaenyra, the poison from your wife, your wife’s poison, bc she loves you so.

-oh my god it was ACTUALLY FUCKING POISON? I was JOKING! I am a god of narrative. Actually, I think that’s you. Holy Jesus mother of fuck.

-“she draws her closer, and sees movement, on the horizon—a van—and tugs her closer, closer still.”

Christ I can see the headlines already, Feckless Princess of Dragonstone feigns ilness to abandon tour, captured frolicking with Princess Consort as thousands die abroad.

-re: headline, ah, well your was more concise!

-I need a 10000 word fic where Daemon chokes on his own blood slowly while everyone and everything he loves, which is very little, mocks and ridicules him. It’s the least he deserves.

-Anyway, to recap the most important thing: RIP Alicent’s Cervix, you have been Witnessed™️

i wish i could mainline these and then post them as the official commentary to the chapter i swear to god it's like you are in my mind

[kashishwrites]

As soon as Amrapali saw him, the unsuccessful man hid again. She had earlier said that she wondered who he was. A soldier again said, "Come Amrapali, you will have to come with us to the palace soon. You have come there in front of everyone to participate in that competition!"

These news brought back the same scene in Amrapali's mind which she was still seeing in the palace. After seeing which she was not able to understand what to say and what to do. Then her Baba said, "Daughter, now you cannot refuse this because this is an age-old tradition of this state, in which once a girl comes forward to participate, then she cannot back out. That is why I stopped you from going there!"

"Yes Baba, now I understand why you stopped me. But I was so foolish that I did not listen to you and went there. But you don't worry at all, I will see in this competition. I will not let you win." While saying this, she was feeling a strange fear. But she did not want to express this fear in front of her father, so she kept quiet.

"Go daughter, now you cannot back out from this otherwise both of us will have to lose our lives. But remember you are the daughter of a soldier who cannot compromise so easily." Mahanaman said in a strong tone.

Amrapali understood the meaning behind her father's words. So she said, "Don't worry Baba. Everything will be fine." After this story, Amrapali started to leave from there with Yas and the citizens. After walking a few steps, she suddenly remembered her entire childhood. How her Baba had brought her up. Also, her Guru Maa Ambe, who had stopped dancing many years ago, still wanted to give her this wonderful art to her. And her husband Kumar Bhatt who used to teach dance to the girls of Vaishali, both of them also played with great love. Remembering all this, she suddenly turned back and started hugging her Baba who was running and then she said, "Don't worry Baba, even if I win this competition today, I will not let any other man touch me." , You don't worry that your daughter will never be a part of this evil practice, what you wanted will happen. Your daughter will never be left on the throne of a royal Vaishya. You will see! This is my promise to you!"

Hearing these words, Mahanaman felt a little relieved. But he knew that this was impossible, so he said, "What will you do now daughter, nothing can be done now. The rules of this kingdom are very strict, if we oppose them, then both of us will be given death penalty and I cannot see the pages of death coming to my daughter. So go from here now!"

"Let's go soldier", Amrapali said this because she started going towards the palace with those soldiers. The whole way, it kept going on in her mind that she has to lose this competition somehow.

However, there was a strange fear in her mind. But he was so brave and fearless that he could not even express this fear to anyone.

In a short while, she reached the palace with the soldiers. There was beautiful decoration all around and the sound of drums was coming and as soon as she stepped on the main door of the palace, the first thing she saw was the other dancers. They were mesmerized by their beautiful faces. She started getting jealous seeing them. That is why she started talking in relationships like this, "Aaa... so many people have come here. This is what everyone is talking about." On the other hand, among the men present there were some men who were fighting for her in the market today and they made her feel as if they had seen an Apsara. At that time, the same discussion was going on among them, "Today, see, she will become the Nagarvadhu and then all our desires will be fulfilled." The other man said pointing towards Amrapali, "Yes brother, you are absolutely right, she is really very beautiful." When all these things reached Amrapali's maternal relatives, she felt as if some sharp sarcasm was piercing her maternal relatives. Then she thought and started thinking, "Baba was absolutely right. I cannot back out from him now. But I will have to somehow stop myself from becoming victorious in this challenge, yes I will definitely do this." Thinking like this, she came to the royal court. And then as soon as she came in front of the king, she said, "Forgive me Maharaj, I made a mistake. But from now on, this maid of the kingdom will not disappoint you."

"Devi, where did you go from here after giving me this opportunity to participate in this competition?" said the king.

On this, Amrapali replied, "Maharaj, I had gone to take blessings from my father."

[waters-and-the-wilde]

okay so i get it with the whole ‘king of the trashed mind palace’ thing but the thing I find actually compelling about Nureyev is that (like with his other skills) he’s Actually Pretty Emotionally Mature or at least manages to comport himself accordingly, but thinking of himself in that way feeds into his overdeveloped sense of self-discipline, and his self-assurance in areas where he doesn’t realize he has blind spots (which makes the upside down map incident hella illustrative) in this essay i will

anyway the biggest thing I see with Nureyev is 'survival mechanisms that backfire or work out brilliantly depending on the situation’. In S1 it shows up more in his Manic Pixie tendencies like the sandwich and remote in his pockets, also his adhd coding that makes him incredibly competent but also involves all-nighters and reading plans upside down under pressure.

when those things are his strengths that’s a big part of why he complements Juno so nicely! Juno's intelligence is geared toward gathering clues and then assembling narratives, getting good insight checks and putting together a bigger picture that Nureyev has trained himself out of being able to see. they're both very good at reading people but Nureyev's strength is being quick on his feet and handling people and situations in the moment while Juno is good at mapping people’s inner landscapes and motivations

- like. S1 Nureyev behaves like he understands pretty well about boundaries and communication to navigate relationships - not perfectly, obviously, plus he also picks his moments to flagrantly trespass out of necessity or just for shits and giggles - YOU BOUGHT ME CLOTHES?? - but he’s aware and it felt pretty well highlighted in comparison to Juno On His Nonsense. he’s incredibly patient and still able to push back when it’s called for. the way he lives fundamentally does not allow him to build real long-term closeness but he has the principles and can deploy them in a sincere context.

- survival mechanisms that backfire is kind of how I read the whole Future Consideration thing, like how you get a certain amount of pileup when you put a pin in your feelings about situations in order to handle said situations and it can take a while to catch on to it (Buddy says it’s my turn to project onto fictional man)

- couple that with his whole ‘always running never looking back’ thing and it’s like. he’s literally always dealing with a situation. yeah that’s probably a lot of pileup. yeah it’s probably overshot into repression. but to me it looks more like, consciously he doesn’t have a problem with the idea of having feelings and those feelings being valid, he just never actually gets a chance to deal with them (and he wants to but he can’t because nowhere in the universe is safe fuck me right up)

- I mean the reason I love Man in Glass so much is that. He wants to be like 'I can be a grown-up and work with my ex and not hand over my heart on a platter this time' which is an understandable boundary under the circumstances! but trying to rationally overpower strong feelings like a.) still being in love with Juno and b.) deeply hurt by Juno’s self-destructive tendencies and inability to communicate is a tall order! so it turns into ‘I have to hold onto the hurt and the distance and the conviction that he’s the same as before, otherwise i’m hosed’

- boom Nureyev’s overcompensating for ‘uh oh juno keeps looking at me like that while looking like that’ by being petty and supercilious bc he's on the defensive this time in the way Juno always used to be. and he's right to be scared about it! on a Watsonian level Nureyev is being put into exactly the situation he Does Not Want that on a Doylist level he Absolutely Needs! he already fell for Juno at his worst, what kind of chance does he stand against a Juno who actually wants to be around him?

- like that’s the crux of FRP for me is that so much of the story hinges on the fact that Juno couldn’t leave yet, and also couldn’t communicate that. if everything was the same but Juno took the out when it was offered, Nureyev would have understood. but Juno’s inability to say ‘look I’m sorry I can’t do this’ is also a symptom of everything he still needed to work through the hard way. And it means Man in Glass Nureyev has no reason not to believe that Juno is still eight self-destructive impulses in a trenchcoat and that it’s a bad idea to walk back into caring for him again.

- also their working together only does half the trick and Nureyev still needs Buddy to completely obliterate the rest of his defenses so that he can sit still long enough to hear Juno out, and for Juno to show up both with the apology that forms the precedent for changed behavior

- anyway Man In Glass is a self-contained arc in its own right and a snapshot into that tipping point, it shows that Nureyev’s sense of discipline and ability to compartmentalize creates its own sort of mess without him realizing it, it makes him and all of us aware of the fact that there’s more going on under the surface. but it’s not indicative of how he is all the time, or rather I think S3 is an interesting mix of his ability to integrate that growth while also struggling with all the stuff that’s lurking under the surface and rearing up every now and again.

my theory is that he’s only going to be able to overcome whatever the hell is going on with his debts because of his time on the Carte Blanche equipping him in the background, having a year of enforced staying in one place to be messy and get to know people and talk about his feelings, in a way that wouldn’t have happened if he’d tried to keep Juno at a distance. And no he clearly couldn’t overhaul everything, but based on the journal bit he was getting real close to that before Dark Matters showed up

the bit where he cleaned out and ran checks out with what Jet said about his overconfidence in his skills -- Nureyev’s self-image is of someone who knows himself and is capable of dealing with things and making the right decisions, so he’s probably thinking he’s doing what he’s gotta but he still doesn’t have a Run Program ask_for_help.exe.

so yeah if i’ve got S4 thoughts: it’s def going to involve the fact that he’s going to get his ass kicked by all the things he's been running from that are catching up with him (the debts, the first love, probably the end of his anonymity). but I see them going for a 'huh I have to stop running from my problems and learn to rely on other people' kind of epiphany and using that to bring him and Juno closer again, esp. in direct contrast to Sasha as Juno’s narrative foil/someone who started out the same and went the opposite direction.

S2-3 you had Juno putting the work in to catch up to meet Nureyev halfway emotionally (and maybe also show that Nureyev isn’t quite as far ahead as he might have looked) and I fucking love the fact that coming onboard the Carte Blanche represents that image, like Juno taking the big leap off of Mars and Nureyev submitting to the mortifying ordeal of staying still for a bit and they’re both in the same place! and then the fact that they had to put work in together and get to know each other in a context of casual intimacy and not just shared trauma in a Martian tomb. and now Nureyev has to unpack some of the stuff that got buried a little too deep so when Juno finds him again they’re going to have to figure out who Nureyev is now and how they’re gonna keep growing together

thank you for coming to my TED talk

[doubleddenden]

Alright so I'm trying to take my mind off of some horrible stuff rn, so I'm gonna theorize some more about Indigo Disk based on some stuff I just learned

Before we go further, keep in mind that Pokémon does mix and blend some myths and folklore around to get a result, so it could be many things

So let's get talking about it

Okay so Terapagos. Pretty obviously our Terastilizing source and the hexagon pokemon mentioned by Heath and the professor.

A few popular theories floating around about it is that it's based on World Turtle mythologies- yes, plural, because it's actually a pretty common mythos found in many Asian religions and even some from Indigenous American religions. Yeah I knew it was mentioned in Hindu, but apparently a lot of people looked at these bad boys and said "yeah that could hold us." It's neat

BUT Terapagos itself is neat in that it's name also references Galapagos Islands, famous for Darwin's study of evolution and also home to Galapagos tortoises.

Could be something, could be nothing.

On a different note, you know how everyone figured out that the Teal Mask legendaries are based Momotaro? There's another Japanese folktale that could bear some significance here.

The Tale of Urashima Taro

I am going to paraphrase, but essentially, a guy some kids messing with a sea turtle. The guy stopped them and helped the turtle back to sea. To thank him, the turtle offered to show him a place called Ryugu-Jo- or as it's known to us, the Dragon Palace, an underwater castle at the bottom of the sea, where Taro met a princess named Otohime, and was welcomed and treated handsomely for several days. After a bit, Taro became homesick and wanted to return home. Otohime gave him a box called the tamatebako, warning him to never open it. When Taro came back to land, he found that 300 years had passed. Everyone he knew and loved had died, and everyone basically thought he sank at sea. Taro opened the box thinking it might help him, only for a puff of smoke to transform him into a feeble old man.

Now let's look at what's represented here:

1. Sea turtle

2. Underwater kingdom

3. Taro is warmly welcomed

Obviously Terapagos is the sea turtle here

The underwater kingdom?

Maybe not so much a kingdom or Dragon Palace, but it is a very fancy underwater school dedicated to battling

And as for the warmly welcomed part: we're exchange students, by this point already Champions of Paldea, and we've met and hung out with Carmine and Kieran in Kitakami- plus given how Pokémon usually is, we're most likely given the welcome wagon.

Now the question is this: given the ending of Urashima Taro, are we to expect something bad to happen to us?

Idk about 300 years passing, but given the history that Heath endured in Area Zero and the madness that eventually took over the professor, it's probably safe to say this turtle may not be so innocent.

Of course, there's another theory floating around that also makes sense: Atlantis. Everyone knows Atlantis, especially modern interpretation that it's a lost, ancient civilization home to all sorts of ancient technology. Blueberry Academy most likely could fit this as well- but... maybe also the Dragon Palace.

Think about this: who makes a damn school underwater? I know mine flooded in heavy rain, but we usually tried to AVOID the water, especially water that could lead to thousands of pounds of pressure breaking in and drowning us all. That and the school specializes in battling- why here?

Unless... this facility is looking and preparing for something.

A place? An object?

Maybe Terapagos IS the object and its being kept there- another reason to be out at sea is to hide. After all, how did it leave Area Zero otherwise? Why the secrecy with the name in the books?

Now let's consider this: who would have knowledge of Terapagos? The professor obviously, but they're dead

At least... one of them.

In Violet, Arven's mother left shortly after he was born. In Scarlet it was Turo. In fact, lots of employees left the original professor.

Theory time: the opposite professor took Terapagos to Blueberry Academy to hide it.

We know that the professor invented Tera Orbs about 10 years ago- that means that they had access to Terapagos that recently.

We also know the AI hated the professor's plan and wanted to stop it at all cost.

What if the deadbeat parent came back for Terapagos? Or eas entrusted with it by the AI at some point?

We also know BBA is a fairly recent build in comparison to N/A Academy, which has been around for hundreds of years.

My theory is that the opposite professor had the school made- or maybe was hired into it- in order to hide Terapagos or use it for their own purposes.

Hell it may not even be the professor. It could be any other of his employees.

Anyway that's enough theorizing. For all we know it's all unrelated and Terapagos just shows up somehow.

[swiftie-sherlockian]

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿Cardiff Surprise Songs🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

🩷I Forgot That You Existed x This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things🖤

🤍I Hate It Here x the lakes🩶

So naturally I’m going to say something about the second mashup as it’s my favorite TTPD song with my favorite folklore song. They’re my favorites because I heavily relate to them. I joked to some friends a few days ago about a mashup of these two and the fact that she’s done it blows my mind. I’m a young introverted AuDHD woman who is very self-conscious and constantly daydreaming and creating music and worlds and stories in my mind and I’ve been like that for as long as I can remember. I used to be extroverted but I think years of grade school bullies and more recently the rise of the pandemic has turned all that on its head. I don’t exhibit the symptoms of maladaptive daydreaming, but I do frequently find myself more at home in my daydreams than I do in my real life in college and my pretty much otherwise nonexistent social life. Aside from the lovely woman I live with, who we’ll call “Libby” and her fiancé we’ll be calling “Clint”, Tumblr is how I talk to most people. I do have other friends in college, but we don’t really hang out and text often. Tumblr and my writing is my great escape, and admittedly, it’s not just Taylor’s music, especially in folklore and evermore and quite a few of the Anthology tracks on TTPD that makes me feel seen, as Taylor wrote folklore and evermore during lockdown;

It’s Sherlock. Mates, there are several reasons why this sideblog serves as both my place for Sherlock RP/posts and Taylor posts, and only part of it is how imhaimh (my Johnlock fic I’m writing on AO3 you can read here) is slightly inspired by Taylor’s music, especially the third chapter roughly based on The Albatross, and the fact that several of her songs remind me of Sherlock and John in general.

It’s the fact that Taylor Swift and Sherlock Holmes make me feel the same sort of feelings, even here when talking about things like this. I am an anglophile. I dream of moving to London. I have the same passion for the city Taylor does even though I’ve never dated a London Boy. It’s been years since I’ve last been, and I bloody miss it for all it is. The lights, the double-decker busses, Harrods, the Underground, being on top of the Shard, riding the London Eye, sightseeing in general (I’ve been to all the big sights; well, most of them)

And then my dearest Tumblr mutual and imhaimh beta reader @gingaaaaa (Hi Ginger! It’s Coral! You rock, mate!) told me to watch BBC Sherlock, and I did. And I adored it.

And it kills me how much I relate to Sherlock. 😂

Oh, believe me, I am nowhere near his level of intelligence, but still… you may remember from my old run of the roleplay back when Shezza was involved as Sherlock that I had taken Myers-Briggs for the first time in several years to find that I was INTP despite having been ESFJ when I was younger. I had completely FLIPPED, which I did not expect. Our brains work similarly despite me lacking a Mind Palace (as far as I know; probably looks more like a Mind Flat to me 👀) and…

I am starting to suspect that I am a high-functioning sociopath.

And I know Sherlock really isn’t, but I’ve looked at the symptoms and I am manipulative 😂 I am so deceitful and in such an unhealthy way. But seriously, it’s the antisocial tendencies I get the most. I am an “I work alone” type person most of the time, and from on here, it may not seem like it, but I am. If I could find my John someday, I would be eternally grateful, but for now, I am my own blogger.

This post is so derailed. It’s 21:11/9:11 PM and I am delaying brushing my teeth to write this post. Haha

But yeah. I’m only 20. I’m still growing as a person. Fuck, I thought I knew exactly what I wanted in life when I was 14 and I was wrong! Here I am changing my major because college helped me decide that my “dream career” would have actually been a bloody nightmare! LMAO

Thanks for sticking around, by the way. I’m a fucking dork, but to my mutuals, whether I met you on my main @adumpofdumbstuff or on this sideblog, I am your fucking dork. Take care.

[survey--s]

671.

What is the one thing you remember most about January of last year? Not much, really. Mike was off work for most of it but otherwise it was just a pretty typical January from what I can remember.

You look at the clock and it’s 11:11, do you wish? No.

How do you think you will look 3 years from now? Probably about the same, just a bit older.

Once you graduate (if you haven’t already) are you leaving your hometown? I left my hometown for university, then went back for a few years, then left again about seven years ago.

What is your dream job? I love what I do now. I'd also love to work in a zoo but I don't have the qualifications to do anything like that and I can't afford to go back and take another degree.

What would be number one on your bucket list? Travel to all the continents.

How old do you think you’ll be when you make your will? I don't really feel the need to make a will - I'm married without children so everything will go to my husband (and vice versa), which is all our will would say anyway.

You get a text message. who do you hope it is? Nobody really.

Are there any songs that you hear that just make you wanna dance? Sure.

Do you get any of your songs from limewire? Ha, how old is this?! I kinda miss LimeWire.

What’s the oddest thing you are wearing right now? I don't think I'm wearing anything odd - just leggings, a t-shirt and a hoody.

You and your best friend get in a fight. why do you think that is? We only ever really argue about his mess.

Do you use the word “basically” a lot? I don't think so.

Do you use proper grammar or use IM talk? Proper grammar.

What is your biggest annoyance at the time? Mike has a cold and kept me awake half the night coughing and now I'm exhausted ha.

You see the person you fell hardest for. what do you do? Well, we're married so...just what I do everyday lol.

Have/are you depressed? Yes, I have a depression diagnosis though it's been pretty well controlled for the past few years now.

Did you grow up in the united states? No. I've never even been there.

Are you dreading tomorrow? Nope, I'm looking forward to it actually.

Do you call anybody ‘baby’? I call Simba "Baby Beans" lol.

If your school had a winter formal on new years, would you go? Fuck that.

Where is the fanciest place you have ever visited? I have no idea. Buckingham Palace maybe?

Who is the one person you can completely be yourself around? My husband, my parents.

Are your pop-ups blocked on your computer? Yes.

Do you know a guy that has voice cracks, but it’s cute? No.

Do you wear earrings on a normal basis? I wear them everyday. They're just part of me at this point - I don't even think about them, they're just "there".

What stereotype would people associate you with? I have no idea.

How old were you when you realized that life goes on? I mean, isn't that just something you always know?

Do you consider yourself mature? When the situation calls for it.

Are your parent’s night owls or morning birds? One of each. My dad is a lark and my mum is an owl.

Do you like to sing? I do, but I'm not very good at it.

Are there some songs that you will never understand the lyrics to? I'm sure, but none are coming to mind right now.

Do you own a lot of picture frames? I think we have about five or six.

Who is your favorite author? Neil Gaiman.

How many pillows are on your bed? I use two, and Mike has a special memory foam one that's supposed to help with his snoring. Then there's two decorative ones as well.

How is your hair right now? Damp from my shower and up in a messy bun.

Is your phone fully charged? No. The battery on it has just dropped massively recently. I'm thinking of switching to an Android when my contract is up as this is the third time this has happened on iPhone.

What’s your favorite thing about the holidays? No stressing or getting up early to work.

Are you still in school? No. I haven't been in education for 12 years now.

How many days/months until your next birthday? Three weeks.

What is your favorite type of cake? Good old fashioned Victoria Sponge with fresh cream, cheesecake (not the baked kind) or coffee and walnut cake.

How many rings do you wear on a day-to-day basis? Just two - my wedding and engagement rings.

When will you next laugh until you cry? I mean, you can't exactly plan things like that.

[lesfeldickbiblestudy]

  Through the Bible with Les Feldick LESSON 1 * PART 3 * BOOK 80 DANIEL – Part 1 - 3 Daniel 1:1 - 2:39 Okay, good to have everybody in this afternoon. We’ve already realized that we’ve got a lot of new folks today, and we want to welcome you.  For those of you joining us on television, we’ve probably got the same thing, probably got a lot of folks who are just catching it for the first time. We are just an informal Bible study. We take it pretty much verse-by-verse, and all we can do is let the Holy Spirit open your understanding and trust that you’ll learn to study and enjoy it like never before. We have one book.  We haven’t advertised it now for a long time. It’s eighty-eight questions and answers that come from the material in our program. We got a new shipment in a while back, so we have plenty of them available in case any of you are interested. Just call the 800 number, and we’ll get them out to you.  Probably the best $11 you will ever spend. All right, we’re going to pick right up where we left off in our last half hour. That will be in Daniel chapter 2, and we’ll start right at verse 1.  And again, in case some of you were new and missed the last program, you remember that Daniel was one of the four young lads that were taken captive.  And when I say young, they were really young.  They were probably between 12 and 14 years of age.  And I want to have you keep that in mind when you see what responsibilities the Lord gives this young man, or this young lad, Daniel at the age of 12, 13, or 14.  He’s taken captive by the Babylonians down to Babylon. In the number one chapter, we had pretty much the introduction of how he ends up down in the palace of the king. All right, now when we come into chapter 2 verse 1, we’re going to pick up where Daniel is going to be put in a tremendous place of responsibility.  And don’t forget his age.  Now he might be 14 or 15.  But he’s not a man.  He’s still just a child. Daniel 2:1a “And in the second year of the reign of Nebuchadnezzar…” Now you’ve got to watch your language; otherwise, you’d say, now wait a minute, back there in chapter 1 it says “in the third year.”  No, watch the differences in who we’re talking about.  In chapter 1 verse 1, it’s the third year of the Jewish king Jehoiakim.  But here we’re talking about: Daniel 2:1-2 “And in the second year of the reign of Nebuchadnezzar, Nebuchadnezzar dreamed dreams, wherewith his spirit was troubled, and his sleep brake from him. 2. Then the king commanded to call the magicians, and the astrologers, and the sorcerers, and the Chaldeans, for to shew the king his dreams.  So they came and stood before the king.”  Now those were all various groups of what they called the wise men in the time of the ancients.  And they were primarily demonically inspired and enlightened sorcerers in witchcraft and so forth.  The last group, the Chaldeans, was pretty much what you’d call the wise.  They were probably the guys that really used some intelligence, especially in discerning the solar system and so forth.  They all had a pretty good handle on the brain.  So anyway, these so-called wise men of Babylon are now before the king. Daniel 2:3a “And the king said unto them, I have dreamed a dream,…”  Now I know there’s a lot of controversy.  Some people think he remembers it, but he just wants to put these guys on trial to see if they’re good enough to recover it. But on the other hand, I have to feel—since we’re dealing with the Omnipotence and the Omniscience of God being able to reveal to Daniel what the old king dreamed—I think he had totally forgotten it, but he had understood the ramifications of it.  For one reason or other, he understood that this was something totally different than anything he’d ever dreamed before.  And that’s why he is so set on having it recovered. Daniel 2:3b-4a “…I have dreamed a dream, and my spirit was troubled to know the dream. 4. Then spake the Chaldeans to the king in Syriack,…” Now, again, this isn’t all that important, but the scoffers sure like to pick up on it.

  From chapter 1 verse 1 up unto this verse, Daniel has been writing in the Hebrew language. Now he switches over to the Syriack, or what we call the Aramaic, and then he speaks in Aramaic all the way over to chapter 7. And then he finishes the Book in Hebrew again.  And of course, the scoffers just scream at that—that just goes to show it’s a forgery.  No, Daniel is not a forgery.  It just shows he’s already been in Babylon long enough to be comfortable with the Aramaic, or the Syriack, language.  On the other hand, he was raised in the Hebrew language, so he was able to use that as well.  But anyway, now he’s speaking in the Aramaic language. Daniel 2:4b-5 “…O king, live forever: tell thy servants the dreams, and we will show the interpretation. 5. The king answered and said to the Chaldeans, The thing is gone from me: (I can’t tell you what I dreamed.  You’ve got to tell me.  Kind of preposterous request, isn’t it?) The thing is gone from me: if ye will not make known unto me the dream, with the interpretation thereof, ye shall be cut in pieces, and your houses shall be made a dunghill.” Now what does that tell you?  That’s the mentality of these oriental despotic dictators.  And they haven’t changed.  We see the same thing today.  Old Saddam Hussein was notorious for his cruelty.  And Nebuchadnezzar was no different.  It made no compunction to him if these guys couldn’t do the impossible. He’d just as soon cut them up and feed them to the dogs, as not.  And I want you to get that—that picture of the thinking of this oriental king. Daniel 2:6-8 “But (he says) if ye show the dream, and the interpretation thereof, ye shall receive of me gifts and rewards and great honor: therefore show me the dream, and the interpretation thereof. 7.  They answered again and said, Let the king tell his servants the dream, and we will show the interpretation of it. 8. The king answered and said, I know of certainty that ye would gain the time, because ye see the thing is gone from me.” What’d he tell them?  He said, you’re just arguing for time.  You’d better come up with it, or you’re dead.  You’re gone.  And in the Oriental system of things, it wasn’t just a husband and father who was put to death, but who else?  The wife and children.  That was all part of their system.  Verse 8 again: Daniel 2:8-9 “The king answered and said, I know of certainty that ye would gain the time, because ye see the thing is gone from me. 9. But if ye will not make known unto me the dream, there is but one decree for you: for ye have prepared lying and corrupt words to speak before me, till the time be changed: therefore tell me the dream, and I shall know that ye can show me the interpretation thereof.”  Or else!  That’s about the attitude.  Tell it to me, or else you are dead ducks, we’d say today. Daniel 2:10 “The Chaldeans answered before the king, and said, (Now, these are the more elite of the four groups.) There is not a man upon the earth that can show the kings matter: therefore there is no king, lord, nor ruler, that asked such things of any magician, or astrologer, or Chaldean.”  King, you are asking the impossible.  Nobody can do what you’re asking. Daniel 2:11a “And it is a rare thing that the king requireth, and there is none other that can show it before the king, except the gods,…”  Now look at that.  That’s a small “g”.  The gods.  Well you see, all the pagan world understood were all their gods and goddesses.  Now always remember that other than Israel, nobody had a concept of the One True God.  Not an iota.  So, all they can fall back on are their pagan, small “g-o-d-s.” Their small pagan gods.  See, plural.  That’s what I want you to see. Daniel 2:11b-12 “…and there is none other that can show it before the king, except the gods, whose dwelling is not with flesh.  12. For this cause the king was angry and very furious, and commanded to destroy all the wise men of Babylon.”  Now you want to remember, he’s an absolute despotic dictator.  He has absolutely no kindness towards the human race whatsoever, unless he can benefit from it.

Daniel 2:13 “And the decree went forth that the wise men should be slain; and they sought Daniel and his fellows to be slain.”  Now who’s in the same bunch?  Daniel and his three friends: Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego.  So Daniel immediately comes under this decree to be put to death along with all the rest of the wise men of Babylon.  All right, now verse 14, now we come back to the crux of the matter.  Daniel is just a lad of 14 or 15 years old. Daniel 2:14 “Then Daniel answered with counsel and wisdom to Arioch the captain of the king’s guard, who was gone forth to slay the wise men of Babylon:” In other words, he was already on his way to carry out the king’s decree. Daniel 2:15-16a “He answered and said to Arioch the king’s captain, Why is the decree so hasty from the king? Then Arioch made the thing known to Daniel. (He explained the circumstances.) 16. Then Daniel went in, and desired of the king that he would give him time,…” What do you suppose Daniel wants with time?  What would you do?  Pray!  Absolutely.  Daniel in some words said just give us some time to pray about it.  That’s what he’s begging for. Daniel 2:16-17 “Then Daniel went in, and desired of the king that he would give him time, and that he would show the king the interpretation. (After he’s prayed about it.) 17. Then Daniel went to his house, and made the thing known to (His three fellow Jewish lads, all the same age who had been renamed, of course, by the Babylonians.) Hananiah, Mishael and Azariah, his companions:” They had been renamed Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego in the Babylonian. Daniel 2:18-19 “That they would desire mercies of the God of heaven concerning this secret; (or this dream) that Daniel and his fellows should not perish with the rest of the wise men of Babylon. (See how crucial this is getting?) 19. Then was the secret revealed unto Daniel in a night vision. Then Daniel blessed the God of heaven.”  Not the gods of paganism, but the God of Heaven—the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Daniel 2:20-21 “Daniel answered and said, Blessed be the name of God for ever and ever: for wisdom and might are his: (Now watch this, because God has never changed.  It’s still just as appropriate today as it was when Daniel wrote it.) 21. And he changeth the times and the seasons: he removeth kings, (or world rulers) and setteth up kings: (or world leaders) he giveth wisdom unto the wise, knowledge to them that know understanding:” Daniel 2:22-23 “He (Now remember what we’re talking about – the God of Heaven.) He revealeth the deep and secret things: he knoweth what is in the darkness, and the light dwelleth with him. (And then Daniel prays.) 23. I thank thee, and praise thee, O thou God of my fathers, who hast given me wisdom and might, and hast made known unto me now what we desired of thee: for thou hast now made known unto us the king’s matter.” Now I’m going to keep hammering at it.  Imagine the kid, fifteen years of age, with this kind of a situation.  His faith—how well-grounded he was before the Babylonians actually took him captive.  Now verse 24: Daniel 2:24-26 “Therefore Daniel went in unto Arioch, whom the king had ordained to destroy the wise men of Babylon: he went and said thus unto him, (Begging on behalf of those old pagan, idolatrous, godless, and god worshipping pagans—Daniel still has the whereabouts to plead their case as well.) Destroy not the wise men of Babylon: bring me in before the king, and I will show unto the king the interpretation. 25. Then Arioch brought in Daniel before the king in haste, and said thus unto him, I have found a man of the captives of Judah, (not really a man—a child) that will make known unto the king theinterpretation. 26. The king answered and said unto Daniel, whose name was Belteshazzar, Art thou able to make known unto me the dream which I have seen, and the interpretation thereof?”    Now again, why is he so aghast?  You’re just a kid.  And you can tell me what all these magicians can’t?  You see

that?  Now why am I making the point?  I want you to realize the power and the Omniscience of the God of Daniel.  But my goodness, He’s not just the God of Daniel.  I trust He’s the God of everyone in this room today.  He hasn’t changed.  He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever.  He’s just as much the God of wisdom today as He was back here with Daniel.  Don’t ever lose that.  We’re dealing with the same God.  Now granted, He deals with us in a different mode than He did with the Old Testament believers, but it’s the same God.  The Sovereign God of the universe. Daniel 2:27-28a “Daniel answered in the presence of the king, and said, The secret (Now lock that word, I’m going to come back to it after a bit.) The secret which the king hath demanded cannot the wise men, the astrologers, the magicians, the soothsayers, show unto the king; 28. But there is a God in heaven (that the Babylonians knew nothing of) there is a God in heaven that revealeth secrets,…” Now I think this is as good a place as any.  Come back with me to Deuteronomy.  Most of you already know what it’s going to be, don’t you?  Deuteronomy 29:29. I dropped a note the other day to the old gentleman who made me aware of this verse years and years ago when I hadn’t been in Oklahoma all that long. He was a retired college president.  He was a retired Army General. And he was one of my best students.  He came up one night after class, and he said, “Les, I think I have found a verse that you will just love.”  And I had never seen it before.  And this is it.  I wrote him the other day, and I said, “Dr. Baker, I want you to know I use this verse over and over and over.” How I thanked him for making me aware of it. Deuteronomy 29:29a “The secret things (See that? Those things that man has absolutely no possible ability to understand because they’re in the mind of God.) The secret things belong unto the LORD our God: but those things which are revealed (In other words, He’ll reveal these things little by little.) those things which are revealed belong unto us and to our children…”  Now this, of course, is Moses speaking of Israel.  But it’s still one of those verses that carries all the way through, because of God’s unchanging Omnipotence.  So always remember that God is the One who keeps things secret. Now the reason I made such a big deal over the secret things of God, is because of our Apostle. Now turn all the way up to the New Testament.  Our Apostle Paul is constantly letting us know that all the things that he is writing in his epistles you will not find anywhere else in Scripture, because they were kept secret.  God kept it secret until He revealed it. All right, the first one I want to look at is Romans 16:25. Most of Christendom does not understand this to this day. That’s why they disagree with me on my line of teaching.  They don’t understand that Paul had things revealed unto him that no one else had ever been given. The Twelve didn’t know them. The Old Testament Prophets didn’t know them. They were strictly kept secret until God revealed them to this Apostle. And that’s what makes his apostleship so uniquely different.  Romans 16 verse 25 and if you’ve never learned anything else before, remember this today.  I don’t care if you remember nothing else today. I want you to remember this—that this is why Paul constantly, through the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, refers to the things that have been kept secret.  Our God is a God who can keep secrets. Romans 16:25 “Now to him that is of power to establish you according to my gospel, and the preaching of Jesus Christ, according to the revelation of the mystery, (And what’s the other word for mystery?  Secret. Here Paul has now been given the wherewithal to proclaim a message that has been kept secret since when?) which was kept secret since the ages began,” All right, now this is just one or two of them.  I’m not going to have time to look at all of them, but turn ahead to Ephesians chapter 3 verses 1 through 9.

  They are all filled with this very thing, how that God has revealed to this Apostle things never before revealed.  But I want to bring it down to the frosting on the cake, if I can put it that way, verse 9.  I haven’t got time to read all eight of them.  Let’s just read verse 9. Ephesians 3:9a “And to make all men see (He’s not just the Apostle of Israel now.  He’s the Apostle of all—Gentiles as well as Jews.) to make all men see what is the fellowship of the mystery (the secret) which from the beginning of the world had been hid in God,...”  It was kept secret.  Nobody had ever heard these things before. That’s why Peter writes in his little epistle—in Paul’s things “are things hard to be understood.”  Why?  They’ve been kept secret.  It was never revealed until this man. Ephesians 3:9b “…from the beginning of the world hath been hid in God, (the same God) who created all things by Jesus Christ:” Well, that was all aside.  You got that free for nothing.  Come back with me to Daniel.  Come back to Daniel now.  Daniel makes it so evident that what he is able to do is to reveal the secrets because his God knows everything and will reveal as He see fits.  Go back to Daniel chapter 2 verse 28 again. Daniel 2:28a “But there is a God in heaven (The same One we deal with.) that revealeth secrets, and maketh known to the king Nebuchadnezzar what shall be in the latter days….” Now, you see, that’s the secret of why Nebuchadnezzar had an idea that there was such an important revelation in this dream that it would actually be worth killing all of the wise men of Babylon to get at the core of it.  He knew that there was something of intrinsic value to this dream, and that’s what it was.  It was foretelling the whole future of the Gentile world, and we still teach it as such to this day.  All right, reading on: Daniel 2:28b-29a “…shall be in the latter days.  Thy dream, and the visions of thy head upon thy bed, are these; 29. As for thee, O king, thy thoughts came into thy mind upon thy bed, what should come to pass hereafter:…” And that’s why I think any student or teacher of prophecy will have to use Daniel as the foundation for all their teaching.  Daniel is the very bedrock of all of our end-time prophecy.  And even old pagan king Nebuchadnezzar had an inkling this was something more than just another dream.  All right, verse 30: Daniel 2:30 “But as for me, this secret is not revealed to me for any wisdom that I have more than any living, but for their sakes that shall make known the interpretation to the king, and that thou mightest know the thoughts of thy heart.”  Now we have to understand that when Daniel begins to unfold and recover this dream, and we’ll be looking at it in a future program, he’s going to lay out the whole timeline of Gentile history starting with Nebuchadnezzar himself, who was the first of the Gentile Empires built.  Now there were other kingdoms, of course, but Babylon under Nebuchadnezzar was the very first of the Gentile, the then-known world, Empire. Now you’ve got to remember, the then-known world wasn’t all that great.  It was that part of the Middle East around the Euphrates River, maybe on a little ways, and then across over the land of Israel.  That’s why it’s in Scripture, because Babylon was intrinsically involved with Israel.  And then, of course, down to Egypt—that was the then-known world.  And old Nebuchadnezzar already had all of that under his thumb.  He was an absolute monarch. From this point on, then, we’re going to see the unfolding of all the great Gentile Empires that came down the pike one right after the other.  The Babylonians and then the Medes and the Persians and then the Greeks and then the Romans—and then the Roman Empire went into the dust in history.  It disappeared.  And pretty much the rest of the time it was anyone with control of the Muslim world.  Now here we are back in our present day and all four of these kingdoms are back in the news.  Back in the news.  Almost every day.

  You say—what?  Well, goodness sakes, for the last four or five years all we’ve had in the front page news is what country?  Iraq—and what’s Iraq?  Babylon.  Baghdad is only about twenty miles from the very ruins of ancient Babylon. All right, then the next was the Medes and the Persians.  Well, who were the Persians?  Iran.  What shows up in the news every day?  Iran is back at the top.  All right, and then came the Greeks.  Well, what was the Greek Empire?  Well, that was that empire that brought about all of our classics in literature and music and art and architecture and all that.  And they’re pretty much back in the news. And then what followed the Greek?  The Romans and now we’ve got the Revived Roman Empire coming up in Western Europe.  I still feel that’s the prophetic empire, the Revived Ten Nations of Western Europe.  All of these things were in Nebuchadnezzar’s dream. But I want you to jump up to the New Testament in our closing remarks with regard to God knowing the end from the beginning.  Come all the way up to Acts chapter 2, and we have to hurry.  We’ve only got a minute left.  Acts chapter 2 and drop in at verses 22 and 23.  Because when you look at the world today, you almost wonder, is anybody still in control?  Don’t you worry about it.  Our God is still in control.  Everything that happens is for a purpose.  Everything. You know, I told my oldest son way last spring when all the presidential primaries began, I said, “Greg, never forget (I think it was FDR that said it. I’m not sure, but I think he did.) that elections are not won by people, they’re won by events.  Just watch and see what happens between now and Election Day.”  Well, what was the big event that turned the election? The financial crash.  That’s all it took and, bingo, everything went the other way—by God’s design. All right, quickly, Acts chapter 2 and let’s go down to verse 23, where Peter is, of course, referring to the crucified, resurrected Messiah. He says: Acts 2:23a “Him, being delivered by the determinate counsel and (What?) foreknowledge of God,…” Was God taken by surprise by the crucifixion?  No.  It was all blueprinted.  It had to happen.  He had to die.  He had to shed His blood. That was what took the place of the atoning blood of the animals all the way up through the Old Testament.  It was all according to the foreknowledge of God, and it has never changed to this very day.

[vulturereyy]

HOOOOOGH NO NEED TO APOLOGIZE FOR THESE AT ALL YOU ARE HELPING ME SO MUCH THANK YOU and also ow ow ow ow ow ow ow

To go more in order off of these:

I don't think PK intentionally let their relationship slip to the royal court. The most important thing about PK weaponizing Hegemol's relationship with Lurien was that he needed something to cull the doubts in his other knights' heads even when he, the king, was not there to defend himself. The royal court has... Some sway over Hallownest's opinions, yes, but not as much as the knights. There was no real reason for PK to also out them to the court, or servants, or otherwise, as that group of people did not have any meaningful impact on the vessel plan. Even if there were some who had doubts, he knew that seeing the remaining great four in line with him would be enough to convince them of the plan. And those who weren't convinced would be a very insignificant minority.

I do think though that word... Got out, at least at the palace. PK did not intentionally let it slip; he did not out Hegemol with only malice on his mind. But he also. Didn't really stop the rumors either. Granted that was because at this point in time he would be consumed by duty in his workshop, but... the damage was done. I think those who heard it secondhand would get the version more like 'omg did you hear sir Hegemol and the Watcher planned to marry??' type gossip instead of 'Hegemol and Lurien love each other deeply and that is why Hegemol is actively opposing the plan.' that the knights got from the King himself.

Oh, believe me, after finding out what PK did Lurien was. Beyond pissed. Had it been earlier in the plan, he would have outright told PK to find another dreamer. But because it was already so far along and he was unfortunately now an integral part... As hurt as he was, he could not allow himself to damn the kingdom. Hallownest above all, right? That's what he and Hegemol agreed to. But he absolutely did not go down a wet rag. I think Lurien went to exactly one (1) meeting of the dreamers after finding out what PK did, and at the end of it, lashed out to him in front of both Herrah and Monomon that PK was to tell him anything he needs in his tower, because he is not going to waste one more minute of his time in his company. Tell him what he needs to do to seal the egg, then get the fuck out of his life. Which was also definitely on purpose because after he stormed off, Herrah and Monomon would need. An explanation from PK as to what the hell that was about. And I don't know if he'd tell them the truth or not.

I think Lurien is a character that could be read many ways. I also enjoy palewatcher tbh and the fact that Lurien is, probably by canon standards, very loyal to the king. But I also have always loved characters who are like. 'I swear my fealty to your people, not to you. As long as you align with that, my loyalty is yours.' So the fact that Lurien was very loyal to the king, was very beloved by him and vice versa, is something that absolutely happened in my canon. My Lurien is also far more logical than Hegemol; I think he would see the same amount of holes in the vessel plan when presented with it, but when also presented with the timeframe, he could not see any other options. He would have agreed to the vessel plan not because he blindly followed the king's words, but because out of everything he tried, and everything he read, and everything he researched... He also could not find a way to save Hallownest. And to him, the cost was not too great, though Hegemol disagreed on that. Lurien and Hegemol never truly got to have an in-depth debate about their differing beliefs on the sacrifice of the Hollow Knight because Hegemol was so far gone with the infection, but... I don't know what would have come from it. I think somewhere deep down, Hegemol knew that this would be the only path forward. It's just t hat he could never bring himself to condone something so vastly outside of his own beliefs about life and purpose and the intrinsic value of every being. To him, the cost was too great. For Lurien, it was as he and his beloved agreed to: Hallownest must come before all. I also wanted to say thank you for your previous ask because not only was it very good to write out, it also helped me fill in one of the biggest plot holes I've been struggling with for my canon: The fact that Lurien is the one who does not want ghost to succeed.

I think Lurien the Watcher did not want the seals to break out of spite.

Imagine sacrificing this much for your kingdom, losing your beloved, being betrayed so severely by your king, all for said king's plan to keep his kingdom afloat.... And it doesn't. Work.

No. No. It has to work. Because all of that could not have been for fucking nothing.

The recontextualizing of Lurien's dreamnail dialogue, to be one of almost mockery in the first, slowly devolving into desperation...

...For King beloved...

...To sleep. To serve...

...Bonds must remain...

...Remain...

...Remain...

...Remain...

...Puts my head in my hands. What have I done.

In your Lurimol head cannon, what is Lurien's relationship with the other 4 Great Knights after he and Hegemol get together? Do they interact more? Or is he just on their peripheral as an important member of the court who also happens to be important to Hegemol?

I can imagine if they didn't pay much attention to Lurien before, that at least Ogrim and Isma would check on him every once in a while after Hegemol succumbed to the infection.

HOOOOOGH thank you so much for this ask because holy shit I think so much about the other knights even if I don't post, and this answer is going to Hurt Me in the most bittersweet way. This is going to be a long one, because I feel like there's a lot of context in my 'canon' that influences how these questions can get answered.

To set the stage first and foremost: In my timeline, Ze'mer is the only one who knows about Lurien and Hegemol's relationship up until the very tail end of it. Ze'mer is the closest to Hegemol out of all the knights, as in my timeline she was the second to join the Pale King's service. Hegemol was responsible for getting her settled in the kingdom, and the two developed a mutually close bond that culminated in them both essentially considering themselves kindred. Hegemol, likewise, is the only one who knows about Ze'mer's relationship with the Traitor Lord's Daughter for a while, though Ze'mer does eventually tell Isma as well.

Lurien's relationship with the remaining Great Knights is cordial and friendly, though I feel he would be hesitant to call any of them friends. The man is quite private, and guards his sense of trust like a hound wounded. He is far from unfriendly towards them, and does trust them with his protection if needed, but does not let them into his personal life. He would have been closest to Ogrim and Isma next given their proximity to the city, though I feel he would have had a high preference for dealing with the latter of the two. This may be a lackluster answer, but I do feel like he would have been far more coworkers with the other four than anyone else. Hegemol and Lurien kept their relationship extremely private, and for good reason:

Both agreed it was an extreme conflict of interest.

Both agreed that they would have to make sure it was not.

Hallownest would always have to come first for the two of them. Hallownest would always have to be the first choice in any decision, without hesitation. That was their duty, after all: to serve their kingdom. The moment they faltered from that path, in their minds, they would have to take measures to ensure that another misstep would not happen again.

The reason that Hegemol and Lurien never let themselves be seen together, never let themselves have a single date in public. They never even let themselves even truly label their own relationship mutually (even though the words 'I love you' were writ in every single cup of tea shared, every single night spent listening to the rain, every single extra hour lain in bed if only to get some more rest beside each other).

The Watcher and his Knight loved Hallownest above all else. Even as they cultivated a small sliver of rebellion together in the form of gentle touches behind velvet curtains, and whispered dates in shops long since closed for the day. They had to love Hallownest above all else, as that was their duty. That was their purpose. That was who they had sworn fealty to. Not the King, not the Lady, but the protection of their Kingdom.

Which is what makes the reveal of their relationship so painfully bitter, when that sense of duty was stripped from anything the Pale King revealed about them.

Hegemol was the most outspoken of the Five against the vessel plan. He was born and raised in a loving family, who ingrained in him from a very young age that all life is precious, and the right to a mind was not only intrinsic, but could be instilled over time. Hegemol was born before Hallownest, before the Pale King granted bugs higher minds. I fully believe there were still some small societies (as evidenced by the fact other bugs can go beyond the kingdom and still be mentally able to hold meaningful social bonds). Hegemol grew up watching bugs that were far more instinctual 'beasts' become more worldly with the gift of masks and the ability to focus themselves. For those reasons alone (there are others, but for simplicity's sake because I know I'm rambling), he voiced active opposition to the plan.

The Pale King, meanwhile, has the gift of foresight. In my canon, he knows that the vessel plan and the Hollow Knight is the only way Hallownest survives, even if it is... In shambles. He does not have the time to consistently defend himself against Hegemol, as much as he (very secretly) applauds his knight's sense of will that he would go against him like this. Hegemol is a testament to the Pale King's triumph through instilling such emotion in a former kingdom of beasts... But now, that mind could spell the downfall of Hallownest.

PK is no fool (at least in this instance). He knows the reputation Hegemol has garnered, especially among his fellow knights, is very well founded. He knows that they look to him for guidance, for example, as a revered older brother who is far, far closer to them than he, as king, would ever be. PK knows keenly the doubts in his judgement that Hegemol has sown into the other's minds, and it's for this reason that he has to nip them at their source.

(My PK has a LOT of mixed feelings about this. This is NOT an easy thing for him to do. But because I also plan to explore this as a main focus in my fic, I want to save all of that struggle and strife for WCWTD ;) )

The way that the other knights (sans Ze'mer) find out about Lurien and Hegemol's relationship is through the Pale King holding it up as leverage to discredit Hegemol's judgement. He uses it as a way to wither away any of the questions the knights had growing on their mind; because to them, this came as a shock. If Hegemol had hid his relationship from them... Then what their king says about it clouding his judgement may have been true. That he was fighting fang and claw against the plan because he did not want to lose his secret lover. This distrust does not happen quickly, but it does come to fruition. Especially when Hegemol succumbs further to the infection and is rendered unable to continue his protests. PK turns their opinions against him, despite how much he and Lurien worked, mutually, to avoid such a fate. And it. Hurts.

To answer your last question, I think Lurien would have isolated himself further after Hegemol's death. I think he would have been gutted not only by the loss of his beloved, but by the betrayal of his king that had to go alongside it. The night of Hegemol's death and PK's plot coming to light is the first and only time Lurien has ever uttered the words 'Hallownest be damned', alone and grieving in his tower. I think he would have refused to see Isma and Ogrim personally, though they would try to at least ensure through conversations with Aedmond, Lurien's butler, that he was still doing... Well enough. Of all the knights, with Hegemol gone, I think Ze'mer would be the only one he would ever allow to step foot in his tower after this, knowing that she and Hegemol were close, and she was likely the only one who admitted to him that she had lost faith in the king, but could see no other way to save Hallownest. And even then, the only time she visited would be to offer him a private trip to Hegemol's grave in the Howling Cliffs, and to leave him with a flower. One to match the bloom she buried alongside her best friend.

Lurien would never take her up on this offer before he became a Dreamer, knowing himself too well that he would have refused to go through the plan if he had to dwell on what transpired any longer.

Eternal sleep was likely a welcome relief for the Watcher.

[lleldey]

Love Is A Game: For Important Friends

Word Count: ~ 11.8k

Description: They say love is a game for fools; but how can you win a game, you never wished to be a part of?

We were always friends – or rather, two neighbouring countries king’s children, who were forced to be friendly with one and other, to avoid further war between our lands.

But somewhere in the space of time and laughs, the line between friends and politics disappeared;

Warning for the chapter: mentions of war

Warnings for the series: mentions of war, yandere themes, blackmail, 18+, smut, blood, more will be added with time

!In no way of shape and form do I think this is how Jungkook acts in real life, this is pure work of fiction, so if you choose to read it, please keep that in mind!

15 years ago

Soft steps and mindless humming filled the lavish castles halls. Little princess wordlessly followed her parents, twirling around and happily counting her steps, as her governess suggested her to do.

“Rea, don’t fall back, come here!” Mommas soft voice interrupted my 75th step, as I ran to hold her hand

The day was sunny, windows reflecting plashes of sun dancing around the shiny ceilings. As we stepped outside the castle’s door, a brown carriage passed through the gate. Momma noticing my lingering gaze at the moving box, leaned close to my ear, and whispered,

“Some important friends are coming to visit us,” I turned away from the moving box to momma,

“And they have a son, some nightfall’s older than you, be friendly to him, dear, show him your playroom and have fun. Only don’t forget that he’s an important friend.” Momma straightened her back, smiling at the stopping box.

An important friend. I don’t remember having a friend, only my chicks at the back of the garden.

Curious eyes lingered as the doors of the box opened, revealing a tall man, followed by a sparkling dress. Only after the two strangers politely smiled at us, a boy descended from the box.

I proudly smiled and bowed with my parents, as my governess teached me to do, but soon after my eyes found the boy again, who undoubtedly watched me.

So, this is my important friend, important he must be, the three of them dressed in dark but elegant clothing, appearing as a breeze of winter in the otherwise warm sunny day.

As the tall people greeted each other, my eyes stayed put on my important friend, seemingly playing a game of who could hold each other’s gaze longer, till they blinked. His eyes twinkled, when he noticed I’m not backing down from the challenge, furthermore squinting his eyes as a new determination overtook his frame.

“Ah, yes, Reagan, this is Prince Jungkook of the Bellum Sanguini Kingdom” As dad encouragingly patted my shoulder, interrupting our game, I stepped forward to my important friend,

“Nice to meet you Prince Jungkook, my name is Reagan!” A smile stretched on my face, as I bowed in front of the boy, he curtly following my actions.

“Children, we will leave you alone as we must discuss some important matters, behave!” The tall man announced, as he and his wife invited themselves into my home. Momma and papa soon joined them, but not before they left a final kiss on my forehead, whispering a quick “Enjoy yourself”.

As I watched them disappear into the castle, a heavy gaze burned the side of my head; turning, Prince Jungkook stared at me, seemingly analysing each one of my movements

The little princess bravely took a deep breath, before sending a quick smile at the boy, friendly braking off the rigid silence,

“Hello, important friend! Would you like to see my friends?” Before the boy could understand what the princess was saying, she quickly took his hand and run into the maze of a home.

Their eager footsteps soon reached the back garden of the palace, the energetic princess finally stopping.

“I usually spend most of my time here, with my friends,” little princess explained. She took off her tiny shoes, leaving them on the patio and stepped onto the grass in the garden. As she turned her head back to her important friend, she noticed that he stood startled at the door to the patio, looking at her with big bambi eyes.

“Are you not coming, important friend?” princess asked confused

“Miss, I have come to the conclusion that this is not appropriate knowing our status of hierarchy” Jungkook mumbled as he looked at her bare feet on the grass.

Little girl looked at Jungkook perplexed, “Apropri-…Hiera- what?” princess now mirrored Jungkooks bambi eyes.  

“Important friend, I didn’t know that you spoke another language in your Kingdom, I’m sorry but I don’t know the words you’re saying.”  

Children looked at each other confused, not prepared to meet such obstacles in the way.

“Princess, we do communicate in the same tongue, I am just perplexed at the situations escalation.” The little girl understood every other word the prince said, she stepped towards him wanting to finally show him her friends.

“Important friend, do you want to go somewhere else?”

“No, miss. King Kang-Dae Jeon has instructed me to obligate the mises wanted actions and steps.” Jungkook tried his hardest to explain the situation to the smaller girl.

Princess gazed at him thoughtfully as she comprehended only the first two words her friend said.

“Important friend, if we speak the same language, you do speak very odd.” The little girl giggled as she squatted down to help Jungkook take off his shoes.

Seeing her actions Jungkooks ears turned red at the close proximity, which was very improper for the two royalties to have.

“Miss, you do not have to do that! I am fully capable of-”

“Jungkook, I see that you need help to remove your shoes. It’s nothing bad, we all learn, don’t worry!” Princess interrupted the boys tries to amend the situation.

Jungkook wanted to burry himself under the ground for the embarrassment he felt. The princess in the first 10 minutes of knowing him, managed to take his hand, run around the castle with him, smile, and insult his knowledge of language and now – worst of all – she is taking off his shoes! He most definitely is not equipped for this.

“Now that you are free from your shoes, we should go see my friends! I haven’t seen them all day, so we should run – they definitely miss me!” The little girl took his hand once again, making him stumble disorientated, as she started running deeper into the garden.

Their quick steps led them to a chicken coop. Jungkook looked around confused, still holding onto the girl’s hand.

“Miss, ought you explain what we are doing in a land of wild animals?” Jungkook could not understand this girl, concluding that she most definitely is crazy. But all she did was smile, as she waved her hand at the chickens, who seeing her started advancing towards them,

“Important friend, meet my friends!” Reagan exclaimed with a blinding smile

“This over here is Kody, while this is Minnie” little girl continued to introduce Jungkook to her chickens, while the prince looked in shock at how the princess sat on a muddy ground and took a chicken in her lap as one would do with a cat.

“Come, sit with me!” Little girl patted the ground next to her.

Jungkook reluctantly sat down next to the princess, he could not stop thinking, that perhaps this is how friends act, perhaps he is the one who’s crazy, not having met other people his age.

Jungkook was sitting on the ground with his back straight, looking around nervously if anyone could see him in such a compromising situation. After all, how could a prince from the most destructive kingdom sit on the ground and talk to chickens?

His thought process was interrupted by the weird, but somehow adoring girl calling him, “Take one as well! Don’t be afraid, they don’t bite.”

Jungkook looked around timidly, feeling out of his element, the shadow of a strong and unsusceptible prince disappearing.

“I am not aware how to-” Jungkook started bashfully explaining, while touching his reddening ears; a habit he has gotten, when feeling vulnerable.

Little princess not wanting him to feel embarrassed, without a word scooted closer to him, taking his hand in hers and slowly petting the chicken that was sitting in her lap.

Little boy looked at the girl with a gaze of mixture between surprise and admiration, her hand that cupped his in a warm embrace was soft, delicate fingers engulfing his with love and patience. A feeling he was not accustomed to overtake his body, heart beating a melody, he had never heard before.

The little patch of dirt on her nose suddenly didn’t look like a disgrace to the crown, freckles on her cheeks didn’t symbolize the lost time one should have spent learning with a governess, but rather a freedom of heart. And when she met his gaze, he didn’t feel the need to scare her away, but rather felt the overpowering need to keep her close, so she could teach him the freedom of heart as well.

Lost in her gaze he absentmindedly whispered, “I thought chickens were meant to be eaten.” The little boy’s walls came crumbling down, no more checking the words and meaning behind them.

The little girl scrunched her nose in response, on one hand overjoyed that she finally understood a full sentence the boy had spoken, but on the other confused by the boy’s words,

“I think that would not be fun. They have feathers, it sounds yucky!”

“And more so, important friend,” princess leaned closer to his ear whispering, “they understand what you are saying, so hush!” she leaned back with eyes wide open.

“No, they don’t!”

“Yea, they do! When I talk to them, they always listen,” the girl expressed, trying to change Jungkooks mind.

“You come here often?” Jungkook looked at his friend, “I mean, to talk to them?”

“They are my only friends, well, except you now of course, but you are different, you are an important friend, so you don’t count,” little girl sighed,

“Nobody wants to talk to me. Everyone smiles and runs away. I think it’s because I’m a princess. But, you know,” princess looked him in the eyes with a sorrowful smile adorning her face,

“Sometimes I just want to hug someone who is not momma or papa.”

Jungkook understood her. It’s a curse binded to a life of glory. Being looked upon, as fun as it is, fulfills your ego, not your heart. And the girl in front of him certainly has the biggest heart he has ever came across to. The first and the only heart, that proclaimed to be the ruler of his heart. Her heart so big, he was afraid that it would burst with a beat too strong.

So, with a courage he never felt before, he promised that he would always protect her heart - his first friends’ heart, from any danger a living being could pose, from any living being, that would come too close.

“Little ruler, from now on and till the end of times, you can always talk and hug me, whenever, wherever.”

As the princess once again understood only half of what her friend was saying, somehow those couple words were enough, as she quickly put the chicken on the ground, and threw herself in an embrace with the boy, her tiny hands keeping Jungkook close by his neck.

 Her first hug with a friend.

And his first hug, that he ever experienced.

 The children spent the whole day playing together in the garden, as parents watchfully noticed them through the windows.

“From my vantage, my boy seems quite fond of your bearer of the throne” King Kang-Dae Jeon gruffly announced.

“That could very well be so, my daughter has the ability to make everyone fond of her.” King Alfred muttered with a proud smile on his face.

“It would point as a good fortune for a united future rulership.” King Jeon looked at his opponent, a hand rubbing his chin.

King Alfred met his gaze, analysing the king’s words, as they suggested another meaning for his family – not as pleasant one.

Not wanting to cause further problems between both kingdoms, since they were positioned in a tense situation for decades, King Alfred answered non-directly, “That would be the choice of themselves in the future.”

Unknowingly to King Alfred, King Kang-Dae Jeon started brewing a new, more significant plan.

 ~

As years passed by, friendship between the crown bearers got stronger with each day, the ability to talk to someone, be it only a few days a year, was something that both children looked forward to. But as the friendship and love grew within the two souls, the tension and unpredictably between both Kingdoms did not falter far behind.

History between the Kingdoms did not hide, rather it liked to remind everyone of it, even if the Crown refused to publicly accept it.

The two Kingdoms had a grim history between them, a war for territory, money, and the rulers’ powers demonstration. Even if the war ended decades ago, it was still present within people’s memories and stories. Because how could one forget thousands of brothers and sisters killed in a battle of selfishness and greed.

So, as the cold war lived on through the battle of one’s mind and heart, people still carried around fear and distaste of the other Kingdom.

To put an end to the flowing rumors and the hiding panic, that seemed to never leave peoples mind, both Kingdoms rulers agreed to publicly meet and smile, to disown the fear within their people. Going as far as to an agreement, that the next ruler of Bellum Sanguini Kingdom, prince Jungkook, would visit Otium Lepor Kingdom at least once a year, for a period of a week.

To bewilderment of King Jeon, his son Jungkook did not oppose to the idea, rather seemed fond of it. Unknowingly to everyone, except his little ruler, Jungkook counted each day of the year in anticipation and jitteriness till he could finally meet her again, and as the years passed by, the mandatory meeting of once a year, became more frequent, Jungkook jumping on every opportunity to visit the Kingdom, where he felt like home.

 As the third year of the friendship between the Crown bearers progressed, Jungkook was once again travelling to his home – if not on papers, then surely in his heart.

Little princess was sitting near the window of the library, writing another letter to her friend, as it now became a routine in their lives – a letter was sent out of their Kingdoms at least once a week, as Jungkook once said to her that every time he reads her letters a warm feeling overcomes his heart, and from that day onwards she promised herself to write them frequently, knowing that Jungkooks life in his castle was not full of rainbows like hers is.

But she was not the only one who expressed her journeys of the day through sent words, Jungkook sent her letters if not every day, then at least every other day. The pile of them sitting in her desk’s drawer, some not yet opened, since she could not manage the time to read through all of them.

As she thought of the next sentence to write, a knock on the library’s door resonated, catching her attention. In came a maid, politely bowing before announcing,

“Princess, a guest has come to visit you.”

Not expecting any guests, especially ones coming to visit particularly her, she quickly stood up, not wanting the mysterious person to await her.

But before she could go through the doors, her father came in with a smile adorning his face, his hand on a shoulder of a boy, whom she was especially keen to.

With a shriek of surprise, little girl ran into the arms of her important friend, in the background hearing her father chuckling.

“Kids, I think it’s my que to leave you two alone, but Rea, don’t forget that the painter will arrive in the middle point of an hour.” Absentmindedly her father’s voice faded in background, as he stepped away with the maid, leaving the two entangled children alone.

Princess still being in disbelief that her friend was right before her, detached herself from the hug, Jungkooks hands still holding her close to him, to take a look at his smiling face – a smile that not many were presented with, his eyes scrunching in the corners, expressing the unbeatable happiness he felt.

She couldn’t contain the youthful giggle that escaped her, throwing her hands once again around his shoulders.

You could feel Jungkooks quick heartbeat that pulsed against your ear, head pressed against his chest. The moment felt serene, the feeling of being in your persons embrace, no matter if it’s a friend, lover, or a family member.

Jungkooks hands tightened around your frame, eyes closing, but unbeknownst to you, he also felt the serene wash over him, like a lullaby calming his mind whilst he pressed his face in your hair, always loving the effect that only your smell could gift him.

“Important friend, I missed you a lot. Before you came in, I was even writing you a letter.” you sighed in his chest

A memory triggered by your words painted Jungkooks irises dark, his eyes slowly opening,

“Why did you not answer to half of my letters?”

“Well, I couldn’t read all of them, I didn’t have time,” you started explaining, as the little prince inhaled a sharper breath, not liking your answer.

“But when I did, I read them with my chicks, I think they like to listen to what you’re saying as well!” you pulled away from him with an excited smile, brightening at the idea of your favorite animals.

Jungkook couldn’t help but giggle at your antics, not able to be annoyed when you were looking at him with a smile, that could leave hundreds of men blind.

But he did really miss you. Back at his ‘home’ he didn’t have anyone to talk to, the walls of his Kingdom always hiding in darkness and sacred secrets. The darkness of his castle leaving him trembling in the coldness, that seeped into his heart when you, the only one who could only with a smile wash away any rotting thought from his mind, were not around.

At the end of the day, he is still a child, perhaps a feared child by the public, due to his lifeless eyes and the lack of sympathy to his people, but still a child who needed love and any kind of physical and emotional contact. The ability to hug someone and feel free a couple of days in a year was not even nearly enough.

So, he opted to writing letters, to keep himself at by from the coldness, that creeped in his mind and actions. He was fine being called selfish, he knew that he was, but he needed you to respond to him, brighten his day with only some scribbled words about the butterflies you saw, or the new chicken that you got.

He refused to accept the possibility of ignorance from you, for he opted to believe that you needed his love and attention as much as he needed yours.

Completely forgetting his previous darkening mood, you leaned on your tippy toes for an eskimo kiss, the movement making you both giggle with reddening ears – a sort of a rule you both followed, whenever one of you wanted to apologize for something you’d done.

Leaning back, you took Jungkook by his hand, leading you both through the door, calling over your shoulder,

“A painter has come to make another family portrait; you must come!”

Jungkook would come even if you wouldn’t ask him to, choosing to spend every possible moment of these days with you; but the knowledge of you wanting to spend more time with him was certainly fulfilling.

As you passed by the corridors of the castle, jumping on the black squares of the marmor flooring, the family room, in which your parents and the painter awaited you, came all too soon. With a slight pout on your lips, from the idea of standing in the same place for an hour till’ the painter finished at least a sketch of the painting dampened your state of mind.

But as the dutiful princess you were, you stopped in front of the doors, and painted a kind smile on your face, with a look besides you to your important friend, the forced smile became genuine, trying to encourage Jungkook to feel more comfortable, knowing how distant he was to other people.

Opening the door, you were met with your parents and the kind man, who made paintings of you for all the years you could remember.

As you greeted the painter, who stood frozen seeing the boy behind you, your mother smiled at Jungkook, welcoming him with a quick, but warm embrace, while muttering,

“Glad to see you, dear, so soon”

The feeling Jungkook felt here was incomparable, there was a reason why he felt like home here; always seeing smiles from your parents, as well as from his little ruler, whenever you made contact. The feeling of welcomeness, which he was not aware of before.

As you turned to Jungkook, your father suggested, “Would you like to be part of the portrait with us, Prince Jungkook?”

This, on the other hand, was unexpected for him, taking him a moment to answer.

“You must join us!” you looked at him with hopeful gaze, a gaze which he could not refuse to.

He gave a curt nod, watching as you gleefully clapped your hands, before taking his position in front of your parents, with you standing right beside him.

As to not seem rude, Jungkook introduced himself to the painter, who replied with a deep bow, but the look in the painters’ eyes was filled with uncertainty and coldness – a look that everyone from the Kingdom of Otium Lepor gave their neighbouring Kingdom.

You watched the scene unfold, as the painter started sketching the portrait, the forced smile painting your face once more. With a quick glance besides you, you noticed that the energy around your important friend had changed drastically, his eyes holding vacant daggers as his face contoured into a stoic expression. No smile, no symbol of humanity shaded his features. Rather distant and forceful waves radiated from him, making you shudder from the duality he possessed.  

If you wouldn’t be acquainted with your dear friend, you would fear him as well, just as the painter refused to look at him for more than a couple seconds.

You didn’t want Jungkook feeling uncomfortable or like he had to be on guard in case of any possessing danger around him; you kept on smiling to the painter, as you subtly intertwined Jungkooks little finger with your own, catching him off guard as he looked down at your hands, a smile growing on his face.

Not being able to compose your giddiness, you looked him in the eyes, as both of you happily chuckled at each other, while intertwining your hands. King Alfred and Queen Damiana behind you, noticing your actions, looked, and smiled at each other, remembering their own youthful days, with a glint of happiness overtaking their expressions as well.

All the while the painter looked amazed at the scene, not believing his eyes, as the generations of war and agony between the Kingdoms disappeared in front of him. As the heir of the obtrusive Kingdom looked human for once, looked like a child for once. But he was the best painter of the Kingdom for a reason, choosing to capture the mesmerizing moment before him, his hands quickly shaded the contours and facial expressions, smiles and love filled eyes; drawing a moment in history – because after all it indeed was one.

This painting marked a union between millions of people. A union between the Kingdoms. Taking its role in the history as a controversial masterpiece, because for some it symbolized hope for the better future, a promise of light in the darkened days. Even centuries forward, for some it indeed was just that, a historical piece that symbolized the beginning of a union.

But for some, it symbolized the tragedy and horror of the awaiting events.

~

The days of Jungkooks visit all too soon passed by. But children, or rather Jungkook, used the time that was given wisely. When he wasn’t a part of some public activity to demonstrate his Kingdoms strength and the union between both Kingdoms, he spent every minute with you, no matter what it was that you were doing. He didn’t feel like there were boundaries that needed to be set, and you quite frankly, enjoyed having someone with you. Be it lessons with your governess, teatime with your plushies or quality time spent with your chickens. Whenever he could, he would be there.

So, it shouldn’t be a surprise, that when evening rolled around, Jungkook was resting his head in your lap, while you were slowly reading, or rather trying to read, the newspaper in your bed.

Jungkook knew that it was not allowed, a rule that was nowhere written, but existing in the society. If something like that happened in his Kingdom, the person would be shamed greatly. But it was not his Kingdom, it was not his castle. And the both of you chose to take advantage of that.

Your parents knew of Jungkook staying in your room, but they always chose to support you. And knowing that the two of you were, after all, children, they knew that anything disgraceful was far from happening.

But still, an unwed woman being in bed with a man was unthinkable. Jungkook took great pride in that thought, knowing that he was the only one who could spend time with you, in your most private space. He would let his imagination flow, while resting his head in your lap, imagining a perfectly shaped future, with you taking a big space in it. He might still be a kid, but he knew what he wanted. And as everyone says, the dream one had as a child, must be the one, that fulfills.

“Jungkook, I can’t read it.” you dramatically sighed, as you rested your back on the headboard.

You were getting frustrated, still perfectioning your reading skills, it took a while before you could read something that is written. And reading the newspaper while slowly formulating the written words, seemed to be a bit too difficult, as your brain started to pulse.

Jungkook merely chuckled as he noticed the pout that embraced your lips. Taking the newspaper and moving to sit beside you, he slowly pronounced every syllable, while following the text with his finger.

“So, that means that they liked our painting?” you asked as Jungkook finished reading.

“I guess, they think it’s a start of a new era”

After the painting of you became public, every newspaper jumped on the train to write about it. “A first to everything, a beginning of a better future!” they said. And perhaps they were right, anyone who looked at the sketched image on the newspaper could tell that their leaders were happy, and if the leaders were happy, so will the public be.

Everyone seemed to also be shocked at how Jungkook looked peaceful, looking at you with soft eyes and a big smile. He looked non-threatening, which was a first.

Putting the newspaper away on your bedside table, Jungkook got the memo, as both of you got under the covers, laying on your sides, looking at each other.

“Jungkook why does your Kingdom not like us?” You were always curious of the matter. You knew only little about the history of your Kingdoms, your governess only explaining that a great war happened for centuries, and that a lot of people’s lives were lost.

Jungkook looked at you at a loss of words to say, he didn’t want you thinking about such vile matters, he knew that you didn’t know much, as a princess and especially still a kid, information of that sort was very limited to you. But as he was the next ruler of Bellum Sanguini Kingdom, the Kingdom, which was more structural and brutal than your own, he was thought of wars, having a lot of lessons about them, and the power that they could gift one.

So, he answered as minimally as he could, “Money and land.”

But his answer only deepened your curiosity, doing the opposite of what he wanted.

“But a lot of people died” you expressed with a frown taking its place.

Jungkook only smiled, as he soothed your grimace with a thumb over your brows,

“Little ruler, that is war.” He adored your naivety, mourning people you never even met. Both of you come from very different circumstances, you from a Kingdom that teaches “Kindness and clear mind can conquer anything”, while he comes from a very different world, their moto being “Power and strength can conquer anything”. Growing up in such an environment, he has embodied the message.

Two opposites, but when they emerge, they build a life full of happiness; or at least he believes so.

“Can I someday come to you? To your Kingdom?” Your words make Jungkooks smile grow. He adores the fact, that you wish to come to him, that you search for possibility to see him.

But unbeknownst to Jungkook, your words hold a different meaning; seeing Jungkook would definitely be a plus, but you want to understand why your people dislike his Kingdom. It surely can’t be that bad.

But Jungkook knows better, he knows that once rainbows and butterflies will be taken from your vision, and when you see the grey routine his people have adapted, your opinion of him will change with your new knowledge. So, he once again opts to answer curtly, and end this conversation,

“It’s against the rules. Once you’re of age, maybe.”

With that, the conversation is dismissed, your breathing getting calmer as you close your eyes imagining traveling to his Kingdom. Seeing different kinds of chickens and meeting new people dressed in their traditional clothing.

As you fall asleep, Jungkook silently watches you, his fingers slowly tracing your hair. He always observes you at night since sleep doesn’t come gracefully to him. Once he closes eyes, night terrors evade his mind. After couple times of waking up in panic, you holding his hand and saying that his dreams are not reality, he didn’t want to disturb you no more.

He didn’t like feeling so vulnerable in front of you, always bearing in mind what his father teached him, that as a man, he must be strong and deny his emotions or they will take hold of him. So, he did, or at least tried to. Happily choosing to watch you for a couple of hours, getting to know every detail of your face, how you smile occasionally in your sleep, or how you exhale as his fingers trace over your eyes. He was content. Only regretfully sighing, once he had to get out of your bed, to not be seen in the morning by any of your maids.

But one day he promises himself, that he will wake up with you next to him. Enjoying the warmth of the sunlight, as it blesses you with another start of the day.

 ~

As years go on and life catches up, you have grown up to be the woman you are now. This was your last day being called a “child”, since tomorrow would be your 19th birthday – your ‘coming of age’ day.

You always looked forward to this day, since it marks a new doorway for you, new responsibilities – which you somehow anticipated. People would look at a person a certain way when they came of age. They listen to you, respect you. And although as a princess you never experienced disrespect or indifference, you noticed the way people would dismiss what you have said, quickly overlooking it as a ramble of a child.

And perhaps a child you were, but with years, experience and countless of lessons with your father and governess, you did not impose a mind of a childlike teenager. You had confidence and the necessary tuition – the walk of a lady, but mindset of a ruler. Perhaps all the spent time with your important friend did indeed rub on you.

But each great ruler must have a space for joy and love, otherwise one will become a person of prejudice and indifference.

And that leads you to today, the day you had been expecting for years. But as important and cherished as the day was, you could not sleep longer than the first sunlight of the day, choosing to spend the first hours by yourself and your trusted friends. Bare feet mingling in grass, wind swaying the robe you quickly threw on before descending your room. You needed to calm down the heavy, yet exhilarating thoughts that had occupied your mind for the last month and a half, so you searched for the place that could provide you peace ever since you knew how to walk.

Even if your peace was related to chirping birds.

Watching how chickens were mindlessly pecking the grass, looking for some lone worms, the scene was all too familiar, having spent the better half of your childhood here. Trodden paths in the grass being one for evidence.

The peaceful aura is overtaken by a muffled cough, demanding your attention.

Throwing a glance over your shoulder, a tall man – as well as your friend, greeted you with a playful smile,

“I most definitely am not surprised to see you here, although I must mention that the chosen time is a bit off putting.”

In honor of princesses’ coming of age, a big celebration, Kingdom wide, is to be taken place this week, your people singing songs on the streets, dancing and celebrating the next rightful crown descendant; but in the heart of Kingdoms palace a coming-together will be held – a ball, some may say, presidents and Rulers of the neighboring countries and Kingdoms greeting their soon-to-be ally.

But your friend in front of you, who so graciously blessed you with an angelic smile, never sent out an acceptance to your official invitation. Granted, the confusion and relief that overtook your mind, transferred itself known on your face, eyes widened and mouth’s corners uplifting, as you close to shrieked out,

“What are you doing here?”

The man only chuckled in response, gifting you with a heart-stopping smile, which was reserved only to you. Turning faster than the wind, you were ready to run in the arms of your important friend, but as you took the first step towards him, he shook his head while muttering a disapproving sound from his lips.

Confusion overtook your body, as he never before denied any sort of contact between you, rather was the one encouraging it. Only when he uncomfortably shifted towards you, did you notice his folded hands behind his back, curiously watching his next moves.

“Since you weren’t in your room, I figured I might find you here,” he started “And as your long-awaited day has finally come, it would be very indecent if I came here with no gifts.” As Jungkook stepped towards you, he unveiled what was hidden behind his back, presenting you a black rooster in his hands.

You would be lying if you said that your first reaction was not a loud cackle followed by a fit of laughter. He did present you a rooster on, arguably, one of the most important days of your life. But somehow as your shoulders were overtaken by laughter, you concluded that this was indeed the best gift one could give on a day, that had been eating your nerves. A moment of joy and carefreeness, that had been given in the best time possible.

Your face betrayed you, as you looked at him with eyes filled with gratefulness, a smile only proving the best-gift-possible scenario. His own bunny smile showcased the absurdity of the situation at hand – prince gifting princess a rooster. If it had not been you, and the history and friendship you two shared, it would have been looked at as the highest form of disrespect. But for you two it was a form of trust and understanding, somehow, he could always read you like the back of his hand, knowing what’s most suitable for you in every situation.

“You are out of this world, important friend.” You took the rooster in your hands, gliding over his rare colored feathers – black was not a color that was available in your country, making the gem in your hands all so more valuable.

But as you caressed the royal-looking animal in your hands, a soft frown overtook your features, “Why does it have strings over his beak?”

Without waiting for his response, your hands started freeing the animal from his restrains, softly caressing the now free beak as you looked at Jungkook for answers.

“Believe me or not but traveling with an animal who tries to bite you every second is not the most comfortable experience.” Even though he might be right, and you indeed never had to travel with such measures, his answer didn’t sit right with you, and the judgment that crept in your mind soon was reflected in your eyes.

Sensing conversations turn for the worse, Jungkook quickly interlined “Shouldn’t you still be in bed?” he took the rooster out of your hands and put him on the ground, “It is 6am and I’m quite sure that you were not to be awakened before 10.”

It was still a mystery how he always seemed to know your daily routine, but after more than 10 years of friendship you had grown accustomed to it, his shadow always lingering next to you whenever he could; ever since childhood, he would always find you wherever you were, whatever you were doing, even more bizarre, when he asked you in the letters how a certain event had gone, when you had not uttered a single word about it.

But with time it became normal, even a certain appreciation bubbled from it, knowing that he was always interested and worried of your daily life, that he kept you in his mind, even hundreds of miles away from you.

But still, a question lingered in the air – how did he know?

“After all these years Jungkook, I thought that you knew better, a lady like me, doesn’t need beauty sleep, when she has already conquered all of it.” As you turned your head to the chickens, from the corner of your eyes you noticed how Jungkook kept looking at you. Not wanting to dwell on his lingering stare, you chose to look at your new rooster, how he stood tall, seemingly assessing his new environment.

While every chicken mingled in a group, looking for some lone worms, he stood alone, watching – if you think about it, quite similar to the man besides you.

And a man he had become – demanding everyone’s attention just by his presence alone. No more was the small child, whom you could catch by surprise just by being, well, you. Then again, you were no longer a small child either, but you chose to believe that was a good thing. Growing up was good, changing your perspective of life is good.

But you were not blind, he did not change only his perspective of things, he had grown mind and body of a man. Opening doors for you, holding your hand as you climbed down the stairs, being there for you whenever you needed to relieve the burden upon your shoulders. And sometimes, even if you chose to turn a blind eye to it, perfectioning his martial art in the garden, particularly facing your bedrooms windows. Whenever he was training, you either straightened your back and went to another room, or sometimes, rarely – as you chose to believe – watched him in amazement from your windows.

You were a woman; you had your desires and soft spots. And him shirtless, with sweat running down his shoulder blades, always found a way to awaken them. And he knew that, judging by the way he would turn his head towards your windows whenever he would finish his trainings, catching your eyes and softly tilting his head in greetings, while a mischievous grin overtook his face. While you could do no more than shuffle away from your windows shuddering a breath of utmost embarrassment. You didn’t need a verbal confirmation to know he loved your eyes on him, perhaps, just as much as he loved teasing you.

He never let you live down, not necessarily the shame of watching him from your windows, but rather the shame of being caught. He demanded your attention, you would go as far as to say he thrived from it, since every time after your little exchange of secret gazes, he would find you, fresh from the bath, and stay behind your back, not particularly saying anything, just showcasing his presence behind you. A crowded place or library, it didn’t matter. He would make himself known, and at these times, as much as you prided yourself in your strength and willpower, it succumbed in his presence, making yourself feel vulnerable and small in the best ways possible.

You knew that he noticed the red hue creeping up your neck and cheeks, but neither of you ever uttered a single word about the incidents, that seemed to become more frequent with years.

But as he watched you right now, you would be a fool, if you said you didn’t notice his seemingly always lingering gaze, watchful of your every step, and smiling of your every success.

Over the years that you two spent together, public was also a witness to them. Numerous romantic rumors intertwined you two, everyone was amazed, yet still skeptical, of the possibility that two formerly enemy Kingdoms could restart the story previously written.

But as you were in the presence of your important friend, you would be lying if you said that you gave a damn about the rumors, in his presence you were not a princess, you were his best friend, and somehow that took greater power.

“You are perfect, little ruler, you don’t have to worry about a single thing,” Jungkook tore you from the depths of your thoughts, as you turned your head towards him, meeting his gaze,

“You have the strength of ten rulers. You have been ready for this day for years,” he always seemed to know the waves crashing your mind, finding the words that could tame them. Your eyes zeroed on his face, awaiting his words that spilled from his lips, calming your heart, and finding the courage in them,  

“So, when you stand on that balcony, in the finest of silks adorning your body, keep your head high to the stars, make them see you just by your presence alone. Watch how they bow down to you, relish in the power that you possess, and never again forget your worth.”

His words seemed too personal to be thought of just now. It seemed like he gave you the key to his own secrets. But you couldn’t utter a word against them, you felt the certainty flood through your veins, the conviction in his eyes as he muttered every word, made you indeed held your head higher, his words clearing every doubt from your mind.

“And besides, I shall be there by your side, and I can assure you, even the loudest and snarkiest of mouths, would not want to participate in a duel with the Jeon Jungkook.” Soft smile overtook your features, he always managed to flip the conversation between you playful.

Sometimes that was disheartening, to say the least. He was a great listener – whenever you would fall into rambles about something that catched your interest, he would listen with utmost interest, latch onto your every word, and smile at your giddiness and expressive gestures. When you would express your hurt or disappointment in an event, he would furrow his brows and encourage you to keep talking, whenever you thought that you were burdening him with your problems.

But when it came to him, he fell short on expressing his emotions, even after years of knowing him, he always held back, as if he was afraid of scaring you away with his thoughts. You chose to not press him, waiting for the day, when he would feel comfortable enough, even if it left an invisible wall between the two of you.

You are aware, that you are the person who most probably knew the deepest waters of his mind – even if these waters were considered shallow in more than a decade long friendship. It wasn’t as if you two didn’t talk, you talked a lot, whether in person or through letters, but whenever the conversation steered to be too personal for him, he would dismiss it with a sarcastic remark or a joke.

And as you smiled at each other in the early sunrise of the day, you held his words close to your heart. You knew that he doesn’t express such feeling without the highest believe in them, he thought them through, and even after such measures he chose to utter them. And that means a lot.

“How come you didn’t have a celebration of coming of age?” You knew that your Kingdoms were complete opposites, even if you hadn’t traveled to his homeland, but this question never ought to leave your mind.

At your question he ticked his head and took a deep breath, most probably thinking how to answer without expressing too much.

“It is true, that I didn’t have a celebration, but coming of age I did have,” This was the first time you heard such information, your curiosity only growing as you shuffled closer to him.

“We have a different approach to it, as you may imagine. To us coming of age means, that one can defend and prove his position of power.” He looked in the distance, formulating his words and hiding from eye contact.

“To prove my worth, I had to shoot a deer at the youngest age I could hold a rifle, and after that I had to start training and participating in meetings and Kingdom’s rulership. So, to us it is not a celebration, rather proving your worth as a leader and a man.” His words didn’t sit right with you at all, and he understood that very well, when he looked you in the eyes.

“At what age was that?”

“Seven.”

It bothered you how he revealed it with such nonchalance, how normal that seemed to him, judging by his tone. How could they put a gun in a child’s hands and expect him to kill with no remorse? And how is he okey with that?

“You never wrote in your letters about it.” You didn’t know if you should feel glad, that such information had been disclosed from your childlike mind at the time, or betrayed, that he had gone through, probably a lot of hurt, and not even utter a single thing to you.

“It wasn’t a big issue.” His words did not make you feel better. Rather gather enough information, that you utterly despise his Kingdoms rulership, without even being there.  

“And afterwards you had to sit through meetings as a child?” His nonchalant hum was the only answer you got.

“It seems like the rooster has gotten himself a friend.” You followed his gaze towards the yard, you noticed how he indeed has a chicken by his side, while others still kept a far distance from him.

And back to it Jungkook was, expertly dodging yet another issue, that had gotten too personal for him.

“I think you should go back to your room and at least try to sleep for the rest three hours. Otherwise, your practiced smile may deflate, while you talk to some stuck up leader.”

He was sweetly trying to distance himself from you, his smile yet thoughts went into a civic war between themselves. You didn’t want to step over his boundaries, but you didn’t want him to feel alone.

So, you chose to not press, as always, but still remind him that you were here. You pressed yourself against his chest, your arms wrapping around his stomach. Sometimes actions expressed more than words, and in this instance, you could only hope that he understood your memo. But as his hand pressed your head deeper in his chest, while his other hand drew circles in your robe, you knew that he did in fact understand it.

“You know I’m always here, right?” His chest rumbled in agreeance, almost like a cat purring, as you said the words, that he always reminded you of, when you felt too embarrassed to express your own feelings or thoughts.

He looked at you, when you rested your chin near his heart and looked up at him, “I know, but as of right now I’m concerned about you. If you don’t fall asleep in the celebration, you might as well freeze to death, since someone was smart enough to go outside in fall in a mere robe.” His growing smirk made you squint your eyes, knowing that he was about to add some witty comment, “And about that, is that a small drop about to fall down from your nose?”

“Hey!” You showed his shoulder, trying to wiggle out of his hold, as he only laughed at your exaggerated face expression, mouth wide open and eyes scrutinizing him in a playful glare.

“Ah, ah-” he shook his head, “A couple more minutes”, and all your effort of wiggling out of his hold went into a drain, as he simply held you closer to his chest.

You couldn’t stop the wine leaving your lips, as Jungkook wouldn’t budge even a centimeter away from you, while you tried to maneuver in every possible angle to get out of his hold, since even tickling didn’t help. If you weren’t sure before that he was indeed made of steel, then now such a thought didn’t even pass your mind.

Once he finally let go of you, you slightly trembled against the autumn wind that caressed your body as you continued to whine, “You used your muscles against me, no fair” but he only gave you his secret bunny smile, the polar opposites of his face and his body seemed too unbelievable for you to associate his face to his actions.

Early morning wind only got stronger, as you started to regret your choice of clothing, goosebumps itching against your silky robe. Hopefully the weather would be pleasant at the time the ball would take place.

“We should head back home; you have not stopped trembling for the last five minutes.” His voice held no possibility of disagreeance, standing firm with a frown overlapping his features, as he touched your reddening cheeks from the growing wind.

“We should” as another gust of wind struck your body, no complaints were passing your mind.

You watched as he took off his coat, gently placing it over your shoulders. He stood before you in only his collared shirt, but you knew better than to say anything against it, sometimes you may behave like a cat and a dog, but senseless arguing was never an option between the two of you, once you noted how the other was overtaken by worry or severity.

So, you let him button up the coat, only teasing him a bit “Careful there, prince. If someone may see us, certain rumors would be travelling around the palace.”

“Well, then we certainly should head to the maids’ quarters. I have always wanted to see their reactions, as I perform a sweeping off the feet kiss” he puckered his lips towards you in a overexerted manner.

Giggling at his demeanor, you let him guide you back to the palace, his hand resting on your back. With the final look over your shoulders, you noted how your new rooster kept close to one of your chickens, seemingly acquiring a friend in the pack.

~

Coming of age was one of the most important days a Kingdom would experience, this day remarked an official heir to the crown – even though you were a child to the King, you were not seen as a ruler before today.

If something were to happen to the King before his heir came of age, a different ruler, some may call them a substitute ruler, would come in place. But as a substitute ruler, they were not allowed to make distinct, major measures, leaving the Kingdom in a very vulnerable position.

Since the war had only recently ended in the grounds of your Kingdom, your coming of age took off a heavy burden sitting on the shoulders of your people. So, this year, no amount of resources were saved.

And as you were reciting your speech of the evening, you glanced at the seamstresses that were currently tightening the body of your dress. You understood fair and square, that no resources were limited, as your dress lightly shined from reflection of the embodied diamonds.

But slight hesitance still occupied your mind, no matter how beautiful the dress was “Is this attire truly appropriate given the celebration?”

The dress was extravagant, no one could deny so, the deep blue color complimented your skin tone, and bodice hugged your form like second skin, masking all the imperfections. But your bare shoulders and slightly risky cleavage, was definitely not the usual gown of royals.

“It embodies the new age and innovative rulership, Your Grace” the seamstress confidently shared, as she put the transparent blue cape around your neckline.

That, you could not deny. With the last look in the mirror, you advanced towards the door, where your father stood in anticipation.

“Look at you, pretty girl” his smile broadened as he saw you, taking your hand in his, and making you turn in a circle, showing off your outfit.

Some things never change as you saw the happiness shine in his eyes, whenever you had gotten a new tailored dress, dad always requested a ‘fashion show’ as he liked to call it. Years may pass, but he still was your father and never once did he forget his utmost duty – fondle his little girl.

“Although, you shall always remain my little girl, I must state, that from the title, you have fully outgrown.” Giggle left your lips, as you saw the proud smile dad adorned.

“We shall move to the celebration, everyone has arrived.” As you started searching your written speech, to recite it one last time, dad turned you around, as he started progressing towards the ball.

“Reagan, you have practiced the speech for the last month. Don’t doubt yourself.” your father glanced at you seriously, “You are the diamond in the sea of wealth. Let yourself shine with grace because they already see you.”

You are the diamond. In and out you shine, the dress projecting perfectly your position. You don’t have to prove your position to the wealthy and almighty. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone, except yourself and your people.

“They have gathered here for you, and you have gathered for your people,” dad continued strongly, “So, speak what you believe in, don’t hide behind the crown.”

The crown – a token, which shines so brightly, that one can stand behind in its shadow, allowing public to stare in amazement at the shining jewel, ignoring the person behind it. A comfortable position indeed if ones of faint heart and shaky knees, or if ones of power-hungry heart and hidden affairs. But not if ones the daughter of a legacy, that fills their people’s hearts with acknowledgment and hope.

Even if your knees shake with nerves in fear of mispronouncing a word or forgetting a line, it takes only a glance around the hall, to see the smiles of your workers as they greet you, to remember the purpose of your position, the purpose of your speech and duty – your people.

Your people, who have cared for you since your birth, singing songs and delivering bouquets of flowers and desserts on your birthdays, celebrating you, as their own child.

As you progress towards the door to the ballroom, the fear has hidden itself in the furthermost part of your brain, allowing courage to seep into your veins, and the embodiment of grace to fill your eyes.

The door to your first victory presents itself before your eyes, but no sense of second thoughts fills you, as fathers strong hold supports you through every step.

As you come to a stop before the doors, you take a good look around the faces that greet you, “Good afternoon, everyone!”

From your left, mother sighs in relief, acknowledging that you do not shake as a leaf trembling with fear, her quick steps approach you, smile visible on her lips, as she softly caresses your cheek, “You look extravagant, dear”, earning a smile from you. Soon looking to your right, at father, she nods her head, while muttering “Not so bad yourself, old man.”  

Fathers’ chest rumbles with laughter, as they fall into a playful back and forth, your attention soon taken by your secretary,

“Anthony, pleasure seeing you!” he bows in front of you, while urging you to step away from your parents.

“Good afternoon, Your Grace, I shall recite you evening’s plans,” he declares taking out small golden papers.

“Here would be your written speech,” he hands you the papers, “If you haven’t memorized it, there shall be no consequences, if you decide to read it.”  

As you look through the speech, you hear only the important keywords, that Anthony mentions, “Choir”, “Speeches”, “Reporters”, but one keyword in particular grabs your attention –

“Fireworks? What would that be?” meeting his gaze the word sounds unfamiliar, foreign to your ears.

Overhearing the conversation, father comes near you, explaining the missing detail of evening, “One of the gifts, leaders have sent you.”

Even though gifts were a must on a ‘coming of age day’, to show respect and best wishes to the ruler, they mostly were of the same nature – jewelry, gold, home decors. Your inquisitive gaze returns to Anthony, urging him to continue,

“The newest technology of Southern Andevia, President Kim assured to organize the activity.”

Hearing the name of your good acquaintance, fondness overtook your facial expressions, nodding your head at Anthony, now looking forwards to the activity at hand.

“Your Grace, I shall also remind you, that today demands the highest form of excellent courtesy, if someone might bother you, or if you might feel overwhelmed by a conversation, all you must do is put your hands behind you, and we will escort you out of the conversation.”

Right, excellent courtesy, the white and fluffy show to put on for reporters and weak of mind. Knowing well and clear, that today resembles more of your assessment, than celebration, no mistaking of words or actions will be overlooked.

One small mistake may be the headline of tomorrows newspaper, the reporters are here to write about all the gossip, hiding themselves behind a mask of free speech. Sometimes Jungkooks indifference towards reporters irks your heart, how he doesn’t do so much as even look at them, striking pass them, leaving them wanting and shouting after him. A great position of which secretly you yearn for, but never are able to achieve, due to the differences both of your Kingdoms possesses.

So, all you do is smile back at Anthony, hiding your distaste towards the false image, that everyone including you has to acquire.

“I might remind you, that as of today, it is deemed unacceptable of you to start a conversation with someone first, you must wait till’ someone else comes to you first, Your Grace,”

As Anthony continues to remind you of all the unnecessary rules you have to oblige, one shared look with your father and you start to slowly progress towards the door to the balcony of ballroom, Anthony following you in tow while he continues to recite seemingly twenty pages of how you can and cannot act.

“And the last thing I must say, the celebration is to happen till’ the rise of morning, but it will be acceptable for you to go rest two hours before the midnight.”

As Anthony finishes his speech, you give him a grateful “Thank you for your service”, acknowledging that he seems to be as nervous as everyone else today.

The door before you seems heavy in anticipation, soft music and talk passing from the ball. The expected has been awaited, and you grip the golden pages in your hand stronger than needed, as you remind yourself of the calming words father told you.

A gentle hand on your shoulders demands your attention, as mother and father come in front of you, “Reagan, God has chosen you to be the next ruler of our Kingdom, don’t fear, because he is with you, just as we are with you.”

Mother embraced you in a hug, her hands soothing your fears. With the last assuring look form mother and a confident nod from your father, they turn towards the door. Father raises hands towards the guards, a knock on the door is heard, and the door opens.

Hurricane of energy translates from the ballroom, chit-chat fills the now quiet hall and lights flicker from the enormous space, yet still fear and nerves are sleeping soundly in your mind. Flicker of smile graces your lips, as the previously memorized cause of actions finally takes place – bells start ringing from the balcony, soon accompanied by the servants who replicate the action throughout the ballroom, gaining attention from the guests, Cecil, major of the Army loudly declares the arrival of King and Queen, flickers of light flashes as father and mother step onto the balcony.

So far, so good. You step closer to the balcony, still out of the view, but close enough to hear the anticipated murmurs from the crowd.

“People of Kingdom Otium Lepor, rulers, presidents and everyone presented, we are thankful for your attendance at this important matter of our Kingdom.” Father turned to smile at mother who in turn gracefully gestured to the crowd,

“As you may know, today is the day our daughter has come of age, today is the day, our Kingdom meets their future ruler. With pride of a Queen, but most importantly mother, I present Reagan Zandra Otium, my daughter and the future Queen.”

Mother and father steps aside from the balcony, shooting you an assuring smile, the crowd clapps, inviting you to step closer. It was now or never, with a pounding heart and tightening stomach, you knew what to do.

With each step towards the balcony, applause and cheers became louder, flashes of cameras brighter yet floor – steadier. You were here for your people. Fathers’ words reminded you of your destiny, and hundreds of faces below you mush into one. The applause subsided, music slowed and yet the trained smile on your lips didn’t falter.

Determined look and one deep breath was all it took, before the words tumbled out of your mouth, “Let me begin by saying I am deeply grateful for the opportunity to celebrate my coming of age with you fine people.” The crowd chuckles as you flash them the brightest smile, seeing that they were eating each word that passed your lips. But your eyes betrayed you, trying to find the one person who promised to hear each and every word you muttered this evening.

“Today, like never before, I have felt the love of my people, strength of our Kingdom and unity of mutual respect and understanding. Before today, I had been addressed as the princess of Otium Lepor, but as of today a new title has been bestowed upon me. Future Queen of Otium Lepor.”

The title felt heavy on your lips, strength behind it and future it holds overpowering. And yet you held your head high to the stars, confidence oozed out of your body, drawing the crowd closer to you. Their eyes flickered brighter with each of your word, just like moths to a flame. Perhaps they wanted to see you fail, but such a glory you wouldn’t gift them. At the end of the day, you are Reagan Zandra Otium, and they are here for you.

“But I ask you not forget, before I was a princess, as I become a Queen, I firstly am a subject to our Kingdom. My loyalty and dedication lie within it, and God has given me strength and destiny to prove it to you. No matter how long ‘till I become a Queen, no matter how long I will be a Queen, my first and only duty is to be one with my people.”

Cards in your hands were long forgotten, they were right, you have been ready for this day for years, and as your gaze sweeps over the crowd and stops at the Kingdoms children standing near the wall, smiling, and waving their hands, you knew that they were the reason you stood on this stage.

And yet, still no sign of him. Each president and ruler looked you in the eye, analysing your words and respectfully smiling, looking like a copy paste of one individual that somehow filled the crowd. But on the right corner, hidden in the shadows stood a unique person, one that is recognisable even within the densest of crowds.

Jungkook. He was smiling at you, hand folded over his chest and hips resting on the wall. A short breath of relief and a genuine smile was all you could gift him before your guest’s demanded your attention.

“At such a time, I am delighted to be in presence of my people, friends, and colleagues. I see that we are a bloc of allies, that thrive on growth and shared memories of bittersweet tragedy.”

“I dearly believe that past has given us knowledge and united us all as one, to look forward into the future that is now before our own eyes. I may become a Queen, yet I am assured that I will not be alone in this journey.”

Presidents and rulers from far and between had come to see you, their actions in itself speaking volumes. You all had faced wrath and poverty, but seeing the ballroom so full, the knowledge that each of you have learnt your lessons and chosen to move forwards – this time, together – is the biggest relief one could experience.

“Looking at you today, I declare that my whole life is to be devoted to you, my people, and my allies, I serve you from today and onwards. You are the essence of my being and destiny, each of my decisions will be made in thought of you and in prosperity of you. Just as I am sure that your strength and faithfulness will forever be given. God help me to execute my vow, and God bless all of you who are inclined to convey in it.”

No longer than a second after the crowd erupted in applause, some cheers and “Hear, hear!” overtook the space. Cards in your hands tightly gripped, yet not even once looked at. It is a sense of power to stand before hundreds of people who applaud you; from the balcony they look small, insignificant, like normal people. But heavens forbid to mistake them as such, they are your Kingdoms safety zone, they are the ones who provide peace and harmony.

Yet as you stand above them, they seem comical; each mirroring the other movements, each of their actions beforehand planned. They look at you all the same, with tones of respect and intrigue, but all it does is make you chuckle. Like little birds eating out of the palm of your hand.

Cameras cliqued each of your movements, how you smiled, waved, and talked, they left you lightheaded, disoriented as white spots overtook your vision, but not even once you stopped the graceful smile on your lips. It was terrifying, yet all the same empowering. The intensity of the flashes only increased once a presence was felt behind you.

Father stood tall and proud behind you, and with a smile loudly announced, “Hereby I say, long live the future Queen!” You stilled in your actions, as a heavy weight was put on you, one that made it impossible to look down or move quickly. The crown adorned your braided hair, father laid it on your head and slowly stepped away.

It was embodied with diamonds and sparkles, holding the promise of your entire future in its place. The crown you looked at in wanders ever since childhood. Oh, how the time passed, from a jewellery that sparkled too bright and felt too heavy when you were a child, to your personal possession that now was hooked in your hair, attaching itself through centuries of bloodline and power. Once put on, never laid off.

It's roots already took its home in your mind, slowly progressing throughout your body until there is nothing more than a crown and the person it has blessed it with. You watched how your people, presidents, rulers bowed before you. Their heads lowered to the ground as strong mutters of “Long live the future Queen” filled the space.

Now you understand what Jungkook told you before, the power you felt surging through your veins, when looking how the strongest men and women bow before you, is impossible to explain. The crown shines bright and dutiful on your head, but not nearly as bright as you do. Seeing how everyone is at their feet for you, you know that you will not be a monarch that sits in shadows, letting the crown outshine you.

You were born for this title and future, and you will forever uphold its name and meaning. Crown is not your power stone, as you are the epitome of its being. Wear it or not, it will forever run through your blood and bones.

Looking how everyone bowed before you, you knew that they were aware of that as well. Although one person stood tall and firm in the crowd of modest individuals. A person you knew fairly well.

Jungkook.

He noticed how you were looking at him with an inquisitive brow, his actions if noticed by anyone else would be deemed as utterly disrespectful, but all that proud species of a man did, was smirk at you.

The audacity he bestowed was astonishing, no fear of press, of the broken rules or the aftermath. He tilted his head and saluted you with his glass of champagne, muttering the words that were already engraved in your mind,

Long live the future Queen

-End of chapter one-

Hello! This is the first story that I have ever published, a long time coming from sleepless nights and hundreds of thoughts, so I hope you enjoyed it! I must say that I am not an expert of how monarchy, nor royalty works, so all of this is pure fabrication and inspiration from some movies I have watched.

In this fanfiction the OC has a given name, but feel free to use your own!

Thank you so much for reading!

[nastybuckybarnes]

Of Kings and Beasts  -  Ten

Pairing: King!Bucky X Princess!Reader X King!Steve

Summary: Born a bastard of the King of Orlen, you’re thrust to the West to marry the Kings. However, the greeting you get is anything but warm, and your life with the King is far from enjoyable. He knows it isn’t your fault his husband is gone, but that fact alone won’t prevent him from taking it out on you.

Warnings: Angst, Injuries, Fluff, Language, Violence, 

Word Count: 2K

A/n: Okay y’all THANK YOU AGAIN SO MUCH FOR 10K FOLLOWERS IT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MCUH OMG Anyway ahem here is part 10 and I hope you enjoy! We’re gonna have a more intense part coming next but until then, enjoy!

THIS SERIES CONTAINS SMUT AND DARK THEMES THAT MAY BE TRIGGERING TO SOME AUDIENCES!!! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!

Series Masterlist

“We make for Asgard.”

~*~

“You look lovely. The colours of Asgard suit you well,” Thor says, his eyes raking over your figure from behind.

Adorning your body is a soft linen gown, the colour of cream. It is cut low in the front, a style Thor assured you is common in his kingdom, and has many different folds and layers to it, making it flow with every step you take.

The fabric itself is lightweight, and the straps lie thinly on your shoulders. The waistline is decorated with gleaming golden gems and is cinched rather tightly.

Over your shoulders is a dark red cape, the same colour as Thor’s.

Your hair is tied up away from your face intricately and elegantly, and a dainty diamond necklace rests around your neck.

You turn to face him, a deep feeling of unease settling in your stomach.

“What is to happen now?” You wonder aloud, eyes fluttering past his face and around the chambers that he’s deemed to be yours for the time being.

“Now we wait. The kings should be here soon, and then we will inform them of the letter you received. I promise you’ll be safe here, Petal.” He cups your cheeks and you swallow hard, nervous about the change in his attitude towards you.

“Thor?” You ask softly, taking a half-step backward in an attempt at removing yourself from his grip.

He surges forward, one hand dropping from your face to wrap around your waist as his lips crash against yours in a fierce and dominating kiss.

Your heart races in your chest and you shove against his face, trying to force him away from you.

Helplessness fills you as you realize that you’ll never be able to overpower him, and dread settles in your gut as he pushes you back until you’re pressed against the wall.

Your muffled cries for help, for him to stop, fall on deaf ears as his lips continue their assault against yours, prying yours open to give his tongue access to your mouth.

Thinking quick, you grip his bottom lip and bite down as hard as you can, drawing blood and successfully making him pull away from you.

He jumps back, one hand coming up to his mouth while you scramble back and away from him, chest heaving and eyes full of betrayal.

His jaw clenches and he takes a step towards you, only to stop when the doors to your chambers burst open.

“(Y/n)!” A familiar voice calls, two men rushing into the room and searching for you.

The tension in the room is palpable and the two Kings pick up on it instantly, their guards raising as they see the way you’re cowering from the blond King before you.

“Are we interrupting something?” Steve asks, his voice ringing with authority.

“No,” you say quickly, regaining your composure and squaring your shoulders as the words of the Valkyrie ring in your ears.

“Thor was just taking his leave,” you say pointedly, staring the King down for a long moment until he nods, bows then spins on his heel and leaves without a word.

You take a deep breath, power and fear chasing each other through your veins while your heart races in your chest.

“(Y/n), are you alright?” Steve asks softly, taking a step towards you and reaching for your hand. You yank it back towards your body, levelling him with a glare.

“If my purpose was solely to bear children, then why are you here if I failed?” The blond glances over at his husband, unsure of how he should address this.

“It is obviously not a secret. I have been threatened even since my departure, and the truth has been brought to my attention. So I ask again, why are you here?” James takes a careful step towards you, and then another, and another until he is standing just directly in front of you.

You keep your shoulders squared and your head held high, refusing to back down.

“(Y/n), there are things we must tell you... things we have not been completely honest about... things that involve our union, and our actions towards you. Will you allow us time to be honest with you?” You swallow hard but nod, wanting nothing more than the truth after all this time in the dark.

James takes your hand delicately in both of his and ushers you to the bed, sitting down beside you while Steve sits on your other side.

The brunet speaks first.

“We were told... by our council that we needed to find a wife. When they heard of our plans to join the two kingdoms of the North and wed each other... they tried to find any way to stop it. But upon seeing our power they relented until they realized that our reign would end if we did not have a queen.

“They gave us a timeframe to find a queen. One that could give us heirs and continue the lineage of both of us. We were presented with many women but you... you stood out from the many faces we saw.”

You frown, brows drawn together tightly as you ponder this.

“My purpose... right from the beginning was nothing more than what you had told me. What you said was true. What I was told is nothing but the truth,” you whisper to James, fighting back the tears that prick at your eyes.

Steve shakes his head, leaning closer to engage in the conversation. “No. Your purpose was... is to be our wife. A queen to our people and the mother of our children. You are meant to rule alongside us, not be behind or beneath us. You are our equal, although we have not treated you as such.”

You sniffle, shaking your head as if trying to shake your feelings away.

“Why have you treated me the way that you have? Why? What have I done to deserve such hostility?”

The two exchange long glances before James sighs and takes your hand, leading it to the thin scar at the base of his skull.

“Someone has operated on me. Altered me in a way that makes me hostile towards you and Steven. We do not know who, but we know that they are close enough to be near me without raising suspicion. I will never be able to apologize enough for my actions. I have hurt you far more than I ever could have imagined myself capable of. But with the help of doctor Banner, we were hoping to have more clues as to who is responsible for this. However, he is still in quite an unstable condition.”

You swallow hard, this new information having you beyond overwhelmed.

“Who would conspire against you in such a way? Who would have such hatred in their heart for the two of you that they would take it out on me?” The two kings sigh, their hearts heavy and their eyes filled with sadness.

“We do not know. But one thing is certain: we will not rest until we figure out who it is and until they are brought to justice.”

~*~

The two Kings settle in the guest chambers for the night, having insisted that you get your own space and that you are welcome to join them if you feel so inclined.

Your mind is still in shambles, thoughts scattered and emotions all over the continent as you prepare for bed.

A knock on your door pulls you from your thoughts and you softly call for them to enter, your guard raising in an instant.

“How may I help you, Your Majesty?” You ask, jaw clenched tightly.

Thor takes a deep breath then lets it out, pacing slowly around your chambers.

“I stepped very far out of line, (Y/n). I let my emotions get the better of me and I was foolish. I apologize sincerely for my actions.” You watch him with furrowed brows, not sure if you should trust him.

“You have... entranced me. Bewitched me. Your husbands have not treated you fairly and, even in the short time that I've known you, I can tell that you are a woman deserving of the world. And if the world cannot be given to you then you deserve everything in it. And yet here you are, cowering from your own kingdom because they failed to protect you.” You want to interrupt. To tell him that he is not aware of the extent of the trauma that the Kings themselves have faced, but you hold your tongue instead.

“I can only hope that one day you will be able to forgive what has transpired today. For I value your company and your companionship and I would be devastated to lose it in any way. However, I will not blame you if you were to push me away. I was out of line and I allowed myself to be weak in a moment when I should have been strong. You needn’t give me an answer tonight, but I am offering my sincerest apologies. While you are here the Palace is yours. Anything you require will be brought to you promptly.”

He’s quiet for a moment before clearing his throat, his eyes on the ground.

“I bid thee goodnight, and I hope pleasant dreams find you tonight.” He turns to leave and you sigh, shaking your head.

“Thor, wait.” He does, turning back to look at you with those soft blue eyes of his.

“I appreciate and accept your apology. I do not look at you any differently because of what transpired, and I am grateful that you came to explain it. I appreciate your friendship and I am glad to have found solace in you, and it would be a shame to squander it over something so trivial.” He smiles, relief and happiness plain as day on his face.

“Good. Thank you for your understanding, (Y/n). Goodnight.” He leaves without another word and you put your head in your hands, beyond confused and frustrated with the feelings stirring inside of you.

You would be lying if you said that the Asgardian King wasn’t attractive. And he has been a friend in times when you’ve otherwise had none.

Shaking the intrusive thoughts out of your head, you exit your chambers and pad softly down the hall, stopping in front of the chambers that have been set aside for your husbands.

You knock twice, butterflies finding a home in your belly as you wait for one of them to allow you entrance.

The door gets pulled open and James stands in front of you, the formal look on his face dropping to give way to a soft smile.

“May I join the two of you tonight?” You ask quietly, looking between him and Steve. The blond looks on eagerly from his spot on the bed, nodding his head quickly.

“Of course, My love.” You bow your head in thanks and enter the room, oblivious to the eyes following your every move from a dark corner of the hallway.

The door shuts behind you but you continue to the bed, crawling on next to Steve while James extinguishes the lanterns lighting the room.

Steve makes room for you in the centre of the bed, pushing the blankets aside to allow you to get comfortable. James climbs on behind you, waiting until you’re settled to get comfortable himself.

Neither of the Kings touch you. No, they stay a respectable distance away.

“I am not so angry that I will not allow my husbands to embrace me,” you say softly, eyes closed as the events of the day catch up to you.

You’re then being held on either side by strong arms and right then and there, in that very moment, you feel the safest you have ever felt in your life.

[llamagoddessofficial]

Thank you to @lost-immortality​ for commissioning this Death God Sans x Reader (plus a special guest~) piece! This was a joy to write!

The Mouth of the Underworld was legendary, to say the least.

It made sense that you’d want to see it, even just one time. When you entered and left the Underworld, it was through Sans’ ability to instantly bring himself anywhere he wanted, not via the Gates that separated the mortal world from that of the dead. Sans had been somewhat confused as to why you wanted to visit it (“not much to see, my love, it’s just a cave.”) but he’d been willing to take you. 

He was... concerned, however. If that was the right word for it. Because of what was guarding the Gates.

Cerberus.

Sans had raised the issue that it may not be a good idea to come to the Gates while the legendarily foul-tempered hellhound was present. He mentioned that Cerberus, while at the place he had unfailingly guarded for thousands of years, tended to become aggressive and overzealous; dangerous to be around, even for deities who normally had nothing to fear. Cerberus didn’t quite strike as much fear into the hearts of Gods and mortals as Sans... but that wasn’t a particularly high bar to cross- and it didn’t mean the creature was exactly beloved either. 

He was the reason Souls without Sans’ permission never made it out of the depths.

“Come on, it’ll be fine. I know you’re nervous but there’s no danger. I’m certain I’ll be safe if you’re with me, Sans...”

“you aren’t subtle. i know you’re trying to manipulate me.”

“It’s working.”

“yes, it is.” He stood from his desk, cloak manifesting from the silver brooches at his shoulders and flowing down his back like wine from a goblet. “we should go now, if we want to arrive before mortal sunset.”

...

It was an absolutely beautiful cavern. A cathedral-like white cave, pillars and signs of worship carved into the stone, sun beaming in from the cavern mouth... great ancient boughs of wisteria wound up the walls and ceiling, hanging thick grapelike bunches of violet and lilac flowers that filled the air with a sweet floral scent and carpeted the ground in soft purplish petals.

... And there he was. Cerberus... asleep as far as you could tell (thank the stars). Far, FAR larger than you’d expected- big enough to be mistaken for some kind of titan or hydra, enough to easily swallow unfortunate men whole. A looming skeletal dog; three great crowned heads, skulls bearing terrifying sword-teeth, the length of his body decorated with scars from years of defending the mouth to freedom. He was laying with his body blocking the mouth of the cave... you briefly wondered how many people had this silhouetted image as the last thing they saw before being violently sent back to the depths of the Underworld.

...

One of his heads, the middle one, opened a socket. Not asleep anymore. You flinched back- Sans placed a steadying touch on your shoulder, no doubt used to people fearing the Guardian. Cerberus had lights in his deep void eyesockets, like his master; observant and sharp as they rolled to land on you. How many Souls had he seen come and go? A single breath from one head sent up a cloud of petals.

Something new... 

... As if the central head had whispered to the others, the other two lifted and glared across the cave at you... you were safe with Sans, right? Right. You backed into him even more and he moved his hand to your forearm. Part of you wanted to ask a thousand questions, is this normal, are we fine? but the other parts of you didn’t dare speak in case it agitated the monster.

... Cerberus fully raised all three heads, dragged his clawed feet underneath him, he’s standing? The sound of bone scraping against rock filled the seemingly endless chamber, petals tumbled down from his shoulders and off his back, he must’ve been there for years... he turned...

...

... And leapt toward you. 

You were certain for a moment that he intended to crush you under one humongous paw but, to your shock, as he moved through the air he shrank. When he jumped he was a beast with teeth as big as your head...

... And when he landed in a light shower of petals, just before you, he was merely the height of a lion, his shoulder perhaps at your waist height. The guardian of the gates stood before you...

... Then barked, play bowed, and rolled onto his back.

...

You immediately gasped, dropping onto your knees out of Sans’ hold, rubbing the exposed ribcage like you were ruffling fur. Cerberus’ first head stuck out a glowing blue tongue, and the middle one barked again, skeletal tail thudding against the ground fast enough to resemble a heartbeat.

“Oh my goodness, you’re just... so fearsome, aren’t you?” You cooed, scratching his ribs. “The stories were right, I’m terrified! Are you the scariest beast in all three realms? Yes you are, yes you are...”

Cerberus eventually rolled back over again, jumping up, pushing his middle head against your face- you couldn’t help but laugh, enthusiastically petting him, and the first head insistently pressed against you too to the point where you would’ve gotten bowled over if you hadn’t quickly readjusted your footing to dole out attention to both.

... Sans chuckled. You were hardly paying attention to him. The third head, apparently a little calmer than the other two fussing you, lifted to greet Sans at your side.

“first you steal my heart,” Sans said, giving Cerberus’ greeting head a small, affectionate scratch on the jaw. “then a place in my bed. and now you steal my hellhound... honestly, when are you going to let me rest?”

“Never.” You wrapped your arms around the two close heads. “This is my puppy now, I’ll fight for him.”

“no need. you seem to be his favourite.”

As if to confirm Sans’ observation, you were gifted the blessing of a very gross lick on the side of your face by the head that’d just returned from greeting his master. 

... You soon realised a predicament- something that was, perhaps, the greatest tragedy that could befall you. It made your heart drop. You turned, looking up at your betrothed, rubbing one of the insistent noses that pressed against your cheek. 

“Sans. You can curse people, right?”

... He raised a curious brow. “... yes.”

“Find whichever horrible monster decided I could only have two arms, and give them the worst curse you have.” Two arms, three heads... injustice. “They need to suffer unendingly for their cruelty.”

“i’ll see to getting that done for you, love.” He teased. “until then... cerberus is one being, so i’m sure he won’t mind your predicament. he seems happy to receive the attention, regardless of the head.”

“You’re really going to look at this adorable creature and tell me you don’t want to pet every head at once?”

Sans laughed, seemingly unable to help himself, a beautiful dark sound. You weren’t sure if it was your adamancy to bestow love on Cerberus, or your declaration that he was ‘adorable’ that apparently entertained him so much... but it always felt nice to make Sans laugh.

“... Hey. Now that I think about it... looks big and scary, is feared through both heaven and earth, but is secretly adorable and gentle... you two are more alike than I thought you’d be!”

“come now. you can’t be saying things like that.” He smirked. “i have a reputation to uphold.”

You held Cerberus’ most affectionate head, the first, and pressed a kiss to his skeletal muzzle as revenge for his gross lick.

“... I know you said he comes and goes from the palace as he pleases... but I really hope he follows us. Otherwise I’m going to have to come here every single day.”

... You were half joking, in your dedication to return to see your new dog. But luckily for you, you didn’t need to make the journey- Cerberus, the ‘untamable’ monstrous hound, wouldn’t leave your side for a moment and loyally followed you and Sans all the way back to the palace, barking and wagging his tail the whole time.

...

Well. Now that made two ancient underworld-dwelling skeletal godmonsters that developed an instantaneous affection for you. Maybe you had a knack?

[solomonish]

My Personal Simeon Fall AU Headcanons

These are within the same realm of this fic - and it is intended as a Simeon x MC universe! These HCs will focus on his time in the Devildom rather than why he fell, but maybe that information will come eventually...

*some things regarding this war I keep mentioning may not be entirely clear - still working on that! However, I’ll try not to put out too much contradicting information, hehe!

WARNING: some angst, brief mention/implication of torture. forcibly removed memories.

First Days

He came to the devildom in a blaze, much like the brothers did, hurtling down like a shooting star. At the core, encasing him as his wings charred to soot, was a brilliant light blue, rimmed by a dazzling white and platinum gold. At his impact site, parts of the dirt and stone have crystallized in the same colors. The site is still roped off for investigation.

He fell, acting as a white flag for both sides to signal the end of a war very few people knew was raging. The impact sent the last of his holy energy into the surrounding area, and demons near the sight complained of itching and general irritation for weeks after.

The only people at the site who looked into his eyes when he struggled to get up were you, Diavolo, Barbatos, Lucifer, and Solomon. A few curious Devildom citizens were scattered about, too, but Diavolo's authoritative vibe kept them too far to see anything.

Diavolo and Barbtos kept him in one room in the castle as he adjusted to the sudden demonic energy inside him and learned to contain his wrath. You were allowed to see him, but only if supervised by Barbatos or Diavolo in case Simeon tried to hurt you.

He was despondent most of the time, sitting curled up and stiff in the middle of the bed that looked untouched. He spent days without sleep, simmering with rage. You never found out if he bottled it up or if he destroyed the room but Barbatos put it back together before you appeared.

(You might not ever learn that some of the methods Diavolo and Barbatos used to bring his memories back were...extreme. They had no intentions of torture or pain, but they desperately wanted to get to them if they could. That’s where his anger was used up - as he screamed out in agony, either from the extraction method or the feeling of having lost everything yet not quite grasping what that meant.)

Satan suggested books and sent some of his personal collection that helped him gather himself when he was created. Diavolo and Barbatos tried to jog his memories, both for personal reasons and to get information on the Celestial realm, but that was exactly why they were gone. His memories had been magically extracted, but haste made him forget most everything instead of just sensitive information regarding the realm.

Eventually, he was free to roam the garden and some hallways, and when Diavolo and Barbatos concluded that regaining his memories was impossible, he was housed.

Power & Standing

He was a powerful angel, so he is a powerful demon, yet not quite as powerful as the brothers.

Simeon, for the majority of the war, was fighting on the side of the Celestial Realm, so he's generally disliked among the citizens of the Devildom. Our cast are all weary around him for multiple reasons - aside from Satan, Beel, Solomon, and MC (obviously).

He isn't an official member of any student council or governing body, nor does he really have a final say in anything, but he does frequently act as an advisor of sorts. He tends to work with Barbatos on that front, discussing in the background anything that might need discussed or worked on separate from the brothers.

Simeon is a wrath demon, though the change in his temper is hardly noticeable at first. He resembles Lucifer in how strict he is, mostly when he is in charge of something, and his anger that releases when he isn't listened to mimics Satan's.

If they are near each other and angry about the same thing, Satan and Simeon can actually feed off of the other's anger and boost their power. Satan does NOT need the boost, but you bet he brings chaos and destruction tenfold is he has it. For Simeon, though, it practically puts him on par with some of the brothers, if only for a short while.

Socially, he is generally ignored, and nobody runs away from him if he initiates conversation - but he doesn't. Simeon turns into a bit of a loner, a large chunk of his personality and memories gone and replaced with anger.

He's still learning how to deal with it.

His demon form consists of black deer-like antlers (not small but just small enough to avoid being entirely cumbersome) and long wings with bone-tipped feathers. His wings are almost always folded against his back and hanging low, the dangling feathers reminiscent of his angelic cloak with the golden charms. He does have a little black deer tail but doesn't like it being commented on.

(Don't worry about aerodynamics or which animal he represents, it's a magical universe its fine uwu)

General Information

He lives in modest home on the outskirts of the Devildom, somewhat close to the castle in case there's some type of emergency that needs to be taken care of but not so close he gets a super nice house and causes some social uproar. He has a small yard and a garden he tends to meticulously.

I imagine the house as a sort of townhouse (although not a for real townhouse because its it's own thing), two stories tall. The downstairs has a small living room, kitchen and bathroom while the entire upstairs is an open bedroom/office type deal. It gives off a gothic cottage type of vibe. No idea if this is helpful so maybe one day I'll build it in the sims.

He keeps his house tidy but has many bookshelves filled with equal parts books and knickknacks.

As stated before, he is a wrath demon, and because of his memories being almost entirely erased, he had a similar fall and adjustment period as Satan. Also, as a writer, he has an intrinsic appreciation for books. He and Satan get along the most out of all the brothers - the fact that Lucifer has mixed (mostly negative)(?) feelings about Simeon makes the deal sweeter for Satan.

Beel doesn’t dislike him, and while he doesn’t trust Simeon yet he’s willing to see if Simeon is on their side now considering none of his family got hurt. Solomon still trusts him though, but he does get a little downtrodden when he has memories that Simeon doesn’t.

When angry, Simeon smiles sweetly but his voice turns dead cold. Whereas Satan goes feral and seeks destruction like a bomb, Simeon feels more like a sniper rifle that needs careful aim and precision with just as devastating consequences. Shouting and immediate carnage are rare and only come after a severe transgression.

Otherwise, Simeon allows himself to be more playful than before. He doesn’t exactly have snide remarks, but he is an expert at stating the truth in a way that feels like a blade cutting through your confidence.

In true "flaunt what ya got without really making it seem purposeful" Simeon fashion, he wears button-down shirts that are almost entirely unbuttoned. They are always patterned and funky, and he wears them tucked into black pants. I'm thinking something like this (he also has patterns that are more "groovy" than vacation)

Will also occasionally sport a deep v like this

He still acts just as naive and confused if you bring up how exposed he is to him, so its best just to suffer in silence.

When making a pact with MC, he makes sure the mark covers a scar he left and doesn't remember from the war on your shoulder. It feels like a longer-lasting apology.

He still calls you "little lamb," but instead of smiling gently at you like a loving shepherd, his smiles look like a predator baring his fangs at his prey. In a sweet way. In a hot way.

What Does He Remember?

At first, nothing. Demonic instinct claws at him and he lashes out at everyone and everything.

He is still a nightmare with technology. Nobody knows if this is residual from how he was before, a result of his memories being taken, or just a trick.

Occasionally, he’ll remember an inside joke, but only halfway. You’ll say something you don’t realize is from before, and he’ll laugh, almost like an impulse. But then his laugh trails off and he gets contemplative, wondering what, exactly, was so funny about it.

The brightness of the Celestial Realm is hard to forget. The rainbow framing the palace and vast fields appear in dreams. He never remembers anything ‘important,’ but it’s enough to remind him that he was discarded.

The Celestial War hasn’t gone away, not in its entirety. There are certain things like battle strategies that he can’t for the life of him conjure up in his mind, but he remembers the bulk of it. It helps him realize why some of the brothers were/are so aloof towards him - nothing was ever as simple as he thought it once to be. Fighting a losing battle isn’t a choice you make when its for love - its simply the only path available.

(Apologies are so, so hard to dish out when you can’t remember most of your transgressions, though.)

He remembers Luke and will worry himself to inconsolable tears at night just thinking about him. Those thrown away don’t get the privilege of knowing what happens to their friends - and even if he did, Simeon wouldn't be so stupid as to put a target on Luke's back by proving that he was still important to him.

But he can only remember Luke's terrified, teary eyes when he realized Simeon was going to turn on the Celestial Realm in the middle of a war, and how he pleaded with Simeon not to. Luke asked what he would do all by himself, and Simeon hopes to his Father for only one thing - that he figured it out.

This is his sore spot. Nobody is allowed to be privy to these thoughts, not even you. But some days he comes to RAD looking worse for wear and you KNOW something is bothering him. He'll just never tell you what.

[syndxlla]

Part eleven of the More To Love series

Summary: You get a chance to reflect on who you are, where you are with your relationships, and what you really want in life with the help of your mother, the Queen of Corellia. You meet some new seemingly friends, who quickly prove you otherwise.

Word Count: 7.1k, NO USE OF ‘y/n’

Warnings: Non-consensual kiss, swearing, alcohol

Author’s note: i am LIVID. why tumblr only lets you have a certain amount of paragraphs in a post IDK! it’s dumb haha and the only reason i went over is because there is so much dialogue in this. BASICALLY. I am making the decision to go easy on myself. I know earlier today I said part 11 would be split into two, but i am going to just make the second half be part 12. SO. i made a new moodboard for this chapter! i hope you like it :).

i wanna say a big THANK YOU to @stinky-child for helping me edit this chapter and getting it out on time!

PART 12 WILL BE RELEASED THURSDAY, MAY 27TH AT 6pm PST, 9pm EST.

part ten

Koska escorted you back to your quarters, the castle corridors were finally starting to calm down a little bit, however, more and more special guests who would be staying in the palace over the weekend walked in and out of doors, most of them not paying any attention to you because of your drab attire. You hoped the knight made it to his meeting on time and dry. There was no way to know until tomorrow morning, however. Koska was silent as she walked behind you, her footsteps much lighter than the knight’s. Your hair was thick and frizzy from the effects of the elements, and you kept your face down out of a foreign sense of shame.

Keeping your face down can’t hide that sense of shame from everyone, however, and before you can make it to your room, you’re hearing a joyful gasp and footsteps pattering in your direction. You look up from your walk of shame to see someone very important to you, it’s not your Knight, it’s not even Soniee, no. It’s your mother, the Queen of Corellia. She’s accompanied by three Corellian guards and she’s wearing the most beautiful yellow gown you had ever seen. It was clearly a gift from Bo-Katan. You smiled brightly, relieved to see someone you love. It had only been a few weeks but it felt like an eternity. You had completely forgotten she would be coming to your engagement ball. You’ve been so preoccupied with the plans and teaching the Knight how to dance that it completely slipped your mind. Your mother had a wide smile on her face, too, and wore the traditional Corellian crown. You ran to her and embraced her fighting around the waist, something that was not appropriate for royalty in public like this but you couldn’t care less. You had been so emotionally confused over the last few weeks that there was nothing you needed more than a fulfilling hug from your parent. She hums with joy when you come into her arms, and she runs her slender fingers through your beautiful hair. You sigh of relief in her embrace.

“I had forgotten you were coming.” You admit, holding back tears of relief. She chuckles in response.

“You look a mess.” She replies and you’re the one to chuckle this time.

“I’ve had quite the day.” You smile, blushing as you remember who you spent it with. “Come, I have so much to tell you.” You pull away, holding her hands in yours and then leading her to the closest sitting room. You were finally starting to understand the layout of the Mandalorian palace, it only took two weeks. This room was the same blue as the royal color, you guide her to sit by you on the sofa, and Koska awkwardly follows. You look over to the handmaiden before standing and walking in her direction. “Lady Reeves, you are dismissed.” You nod while speaking in a regal tone, but after stating it, your voice hushes and you whisper to her, “Is he going to be alright?” You ask in reference to the Knight.

She nods once, “Even if he was late, he’s bound to duty by the Queen, he’ll be okay.” Your stomach twists.

“What does that even mean?” You ask, there is much he is not telling you.

Koska sighs, she seemed to regret saying that. “I’ll worry about him, you enjoy your time with your mother.” She nods to the Queen who was patiently awaiting your return. You smile a “thank you” and walk back to the Corellian Queen. When Koska closes the door finally, you slouch into the couch, feeling pure relief as you were alone with your kin.

“You look absolutely exhausted.” Your mother says.

“I am, life here is exhausting. There are so many rules, much more than back at home.” You awkwardly shrug.

“We miss you.”

“I miss you too, more than you know.” You were so homesick these days. “I had to spend four days learning all the rules and customs and I still take private lessons from the literal queen so I don’t embarrass her anymore.” You roll your eyes, knowing that you couldn’t express this arrogance to anyone else in the palace and taking advantage of the chance now.

“Oh, I'm sorry love, I worried that there might be a bit of a culture shock.” She takes your hand with hers, stroking the stop of it with her own cold hands.

“Is father here?” You ask, your eyes hopeful. That glimmer immediately fades when she sighs, her eyes leaving yours. “What? What’s wrong?”

“He’s not coming…”

“What? Why?”

“He’s… sick, I didn’t want to tell you but it’s your right to know. You would have eventually found out anyway.” She somberly explains.

“Is he okay?”

“Yes, we think so. But traveling and socializing in his condition was not realistic. We understand that rumors will start, but his health is necessary before an impending war.” She frowns, and you try not to let it upset you too much. “Enough of that, tell me about this place.” Her tone immediately flips.

You smile, “It’s so hot, much hotter than Corellia. I mean the heat is exhausting and the dresses are heavy and the tea parties are always outside and I always feel overheated.” You complain.

“Do you at least like the prince?” She asks. “Is he cute?”

Now you must choose if you’re going to lie, like you have for the last fortnight, or be truthful with the only person you feel that you can be. You sigh, and just look at her, defeated, hoping that would be enough to tell her.

She hums empathetically. “Oh dear.”

“Yeah…” You sigh, happy she understood and you didn’t have to make the decision of communication.

“Well, keep your head up, I didn’t really like your father all that much until we had you.” She chuckles.

“What?” You ask, your eyes showing surprise. “I had no idea…” You weren’t sure how much you liked that thought, your parents had always been an example of a couple you’d like to experience for yourself. “Why had you never told me?”

“There was no reason for you to know before now. The older you get, the more you’ll learn what you need to hear.” She explains. You supposed she was right. “And remember, it’s supposed to be a partnership—marriage that is— it’s not so bad if you work at it.”

“Well, he certainly likes being solo.” You humph. “He’s very kind, and it’s clear he cares for his kingdom but-“ You knew you weren’t being completely truthful with her.

“But what?”

You debated your next words. You wanted to tell her, more than anything you wanted your mother to know what was really going on, but you knew you couldn’t. You knew she wouldn’t understand. This marriage is a diplomatic solution to an oncoming war of her home kingdom. She wouldn’t understand the strife. “Nothing.” You feel untruthful to yourself, but you can’t do anything about it. “I just feel like I will be unhappy in our marriage.”

“Marriage isn’t supposed to make you happy.”

You hated that, it wasn’t the first time she had said it to you, either. When an arranged marriage was first brought up, she said it then for the first time. The other time she said it to you was about three weeks ago, just before you were going to leave Corellia and come to this ornate prison. It was your last attempt to try and get out of it, but she uttered those words and you had to live with it.

This time, you pulled your hand away from hers. “But what about love? I thought you loved my father!?”

“I do love him, but that didn’t happen for a long time, like I said, not until you were born.”

“So then what’s the reason for all this? For sending me here for a big ball and a fancy wedding if I am not supposed to love the man I’m sharing these parties with? How am I to enjoy marriage before children then?” You stand up on these words out of frustration. You hated feeling like your only purpose in this world is to bear children, to produce an heir.

“Love between royals is not a natural thing, it can’t just happen between any two people. There must be that connection there and it often isn’t developed for a while.” She chuckles. “What? Did you think you were going to live inside one of those fairytales your wet nurse used to tell you before you went to sleep?” She asks, looking up at you, surprised.

“What do you mean ‘between royals’?”

“We must do what’s best for our people, it’s selfish to marry for love when you are royalty.”

You feel defeated.

“No… No, there's so much more to love. Love is not selfish, in fact, I believe that loving someone with our hesitation and unconditionally is the most selfless act one could ever do.” Your voice raises just a bit. You meant every word you said.

“If you feel this way about love, then surely you must love the Prince. What’s the problem then? We’ve been preparing you for this reality for years, it’s not a new concept that you would not love immediately, I can only imagine you would feel so emotionally because you have those feelings for someone.”

Did you?

You consider what she was saying, your eyes trailing to the side as you thought. You supposed she was right, there would be no reason for you to feel so passionately about it if you hadn’t experienced it for yourself.

But you weren’t having that experience with Korkie, the hell you weren’t.

Did you love the Knight? You don’t know his name, you don’t know his face, you don’t know anything about him and yet you are starting to think that infatuation has grown into adoration. Your legs feel weak, and you have to slowly lower yourself onto the couch again, feeling woozy from the realization. How did you let it get so far? Your confused face turns to look at your mother’s, eyebrows furrowed and mouth slightly open.

“I sense you realized something you didn’t already know.”

You slowly nod your head. Unsure of how to react, you fiddle with your fingers, trying to gain your bearings again. You expect your mother to speak up but she never does.

Before the conversation continues, however, the door is pulled open and three Knights are walking in, a Butler steps in, “Her Majesty, The Queen.” He says before nodding and stepping away. Bo-Katan glides into the room, regal as ever. You and your mother stand up from where you sat, curtsying for your hostess.

“Your Majesty.” She takes your mother’s hand, both of them smiling and kissing one another on either cheek. “I trust your travels were comfortable?”

“Yes, your coachmen were very hospitable.” Your mother nods.

Korkie then enters the rooms with another young Prince who you hadn't met before. He was blonde, and skinny as a twig. He wore a white and gold ceremonial cloak that covered his right shoulder. You smile at Korkie out of Obligation, and he and the other prince bow to the women in the room.

“Princess!” Korkie cheers, “This is my cousin, Prince Hugo of Bespin.”

“A pleasure to meet you, Your Highness.” He takes your hand and kisses the top of it, his smile charming and blue eyes bright. You were flattered by the gesture, humming.

“The pleasure is mine.” You follow royal protocol. Then, another woman enters the room. She’s tall, an intricate headpiece adorns long, black hair and she has hypnotic, black eyes hidden by deep set, hooded eyes. She’s beautiful, with toned skin and red dots drawn under her lips making her stand out from everyone in the room.

“Ah, Her Majesty Queen Clarya of Naboo.” Bo-Katan introduces. The Elven Queen Ahsoka then enters the room, and everyone, even the Queens bow out of respect before the door is closed. The parlor is suddenly very full, and your intimate moment with your mother is lost entirely. You are suddenly very aware of your disheveled look, and try to run your fingers through your hair a few times.

“It’s lovely to finally meet you.” Clarya says, smiling. “I’ve heard so much about you.” Taking your hand and giving you a friendly squeeze.

“Oh… I’m afraid I haven’t heard much about you.” You apologize.

“No troubles, You are all the gossip among the other Kingdoms.” The eastern queen explains.

“Yes, It appears you are.” Korkie says, moving to stand by your side. “How wonderful that my beautiful wife-to-be is regarded so highly across the world.” He tries to take your hand but you pull it away, not necessarily meaning to, but it was a reflex that you failed to suppress after realizing you were in love with an entirely different man. He clears his throat, and the aura in the room is awkward, you aren’t sure what to do, so you just say the first thing to come out of your mouth.

“Have any of you gone to the beach? It’s lovely!” You awkwardly smile before walking over to the drink cart underneath a portrait of a Manda’lor of a past generation. You try to ignore all the people, feeling a little embarrassed that they were all seeing you dressed like this. You didn’t even think of what suspicion could be born out of that phrase.

“Oh yes, our sandy beaches are widely loved by all.” Bo-Katan takes a seat on the sofa in the place you had sat at just moments before, crossing her ankles under her gown. You shakily pour amber liquid into a crystal glass, your hand shaking as you bring it to your lips, taking a sip of the alcohol.

“Nothing like the Corellian beaches, I assume?” Your mother asks. “Our beaches are rocky and often frozen over.”

“Ah yes, but the Corellian ship fjords are lovely, what a wonderful exposure to culture you raised your daughter with!” Ahsoka sings.

“She turned out alright.” Your mother teases and everyone chuckles warmly. You turn around after drinking, and sheepishly smile. Gods you hope she meant that.

“Well, we are all very excited for the ball tomorrow.” Clarya says, “My assistant worked on a mask for hours the night before we left. It will be an extravagant sight to see everyone dressed so festively.”

“Of course, but we all know none of us can compare to the fashion and extravagance of the Naboolians.” Korkie hums. Everyone chuckles again. You nervously looked out to all of them, you had just made possibly the biggest mistake of your life and none of them paid any attention to you despite it. You had just shown Korkie your first and only sign of true disinterest the night before your engagement ball and you desperately wished you could go back in time and take his hand instead of denying the act of affection, even if you didn’t feel good about it.

“I think you will all be pleased to hear that it was the Princess who came up with the Masquerade idea.” Bo gestures to you. You smile with your teeth, trying to act normal and not like you were secretly dying inside. There is general amusement when that is said, and you can’t help but fidget with the crystal alcohol glass, wanting to leave the room and return to the comfortable embrace of the Knight on the beach.

“Beautiful and smart!” Korkie’s cousin laughs, putting emphasis on the ‘and’. “It’s not every day you find a woman like that!” Everyone laughs again, and this time you force out a faux chuckle to seem more involved in the eyes of the others. “You better hang onto her, Kork!” Korkie smiled at his cousin's words, looking over to you. You feel weak, not liking all the attention. If this much attention was making you feel this way, what would the ball with hundreds of guests tomorrow night be like?

“Yes but, I can’t seem to remember going to the beach with you?” Korkie asks, his diplomatic voice cutting through the laughter. You nervously laugh. He knew something was up. How could you be so careless?

“What? Did I say something about the beach?” You try to play it off cluelessly.

“Oh come on, we all know you aren’t that ditzy.” His cousin groans

“Your fiance asked you a question, dear.” Your mother prods.

“Yes, did you go to the beach sometime during your time here?” Bo-Katan is the one to ask this time, and your legs are starting to feel unsteady.

“It’s not a bad thing, we just want to know.” Korkie takes a step in your direction, making you feel closed in. “We all love the beach here and we are happy you have gotten the chance to enjoy it.” You sensed there was an undertone with his true meaning.

You weren’t sure if you believed him when he said this, “Is it hot in here?” You chuckle, “I think I’ll have another drink, would you like one, Korkie? You ask before turning around and pouring another glass of brandy. He can see how shaky your hand is as you try to fill the cup. He stands behind you, wrapping his arm around you and cupping your hand with his in an attempt to make the pouring more steady. The action startles you, and you flinch as a reaction, dropping the crystal glass in your hand. It was already partially full, and it falls down to the floor in slow motion, golden drink splashing out of it as glass shatters on impact, making a loud, crashing sound that sends shards out across the floor and leaves a puddle of alcohol to soak into the bottom hem of Koska’s sister’s dress. The women of the room gasp from shock, and Hugo walks quickly over to see the mess. You look down at the glass in shock of what you just did, your heart sinking and stomach churning. Lady Tano is the next one to walk over to you, taking you by the shoulders and guiding you to one of the arm chairs, helping you sit down. The room was deathly silent now, you could hear your pulse ringing through your ears. Ahsoka crouches before you, ruling your hand with hers and trying to comfort you from the unexpected shock. Korkies hands are balled into fists. Was he angry with you?

“No worries.” Hugo laughs, trying to be an entertainer, “Butler!” The Butler opens the door.

“Is everything alright?” He asks after bowing.

“Yes, we just made a little mess, would you be so kind as to clean it up?” Hugo walks Korkie, who seems to be just as shocked and embarrassed as you, over to another armchair. The butler snaps and then whistles and three young maids come in, each one getting on their hands and knees to pick up the pieces of glass.

“Princess?” Your mother says, “Do you have something you would like to say to the Manda’lor?” She awkwardly asks, clearly trying to make good from the situation, side-eying Bo.

Your pale face turns to look at Bo, who had that same disappointed frown that you always see on her.

“My deepest apologies, your Majesty.” You clear your throat before painfully looking over to where Korkie sat, his hand resting in his palm and expression down turned.

“Well!” Hugo takes the center of the room. “No use in sitting here in silence, mistakes happen! Right Auntie?” He says to Bo.

“Of course.” She smiles, physically accepting your apology with a reassuring nod.

“Lovely, would anyone like some music?” He asks.

“That would be lovely, Hugo.” Lady Tano says in her ethereal voice. He smiles and walks over to the baby grand piano in the corner of the room, the same baby grand that you played at for your Knight a few weeks ago.

“The Princess plays!” Your mother says, trying to alleviate any tension.

“She does?” Hugo makes direct eye contact with you. “Would you like to play a duet with me?”

“Hugo, she just-“ Ahsoka begins but is interrupted by your mother.

“Oh won’t you play for us Dear?” She asks, smiling.

“Please! I have wanted to hear you play since I was told you could.” Bo-Katan asks. It would be rude to decline a request from the Queen and the Host of the night.

You nod and stand up, that could be just the thing you need to feel better. You walk over to the piano, stopping just before Hugo.

“Bass or Soprano?” He asks, muttering so quietly that only you can hear it.

“Soprano.” You say. He pulls the bench out and sits first since he would be playing the lower part. You then sit next to him, your hands still slightly shaking.

“Do you know the ‘Dathomirian Waltz’?” He asks. You nod. “Lovely, key of D minor then, I’ll follow you.” He pulls his hands up to the keys, and you follow, taking two deep breaths, the first to calm your shaking hands, the second to conduct both of you in at the same time. Together you play a set of intricate chords, Hugo emphasizing on the bass notes, playing a complex scale that brought his left hand over his right several times. You carry the melody, playing just slightly louder than him and allowing yourself to fall into the trance of performing. Your hands finally quit shaking after a few phrases of the music, allowing it to soothe your nerves. Music has always done that for you. All of the nobles in the room smile, the Naboolian Queen sighing at the beauty of the complicated piece. You can’t keep the smile from pulling on your lips. Korkie’s cousin was very talented, much better than you. His hand brushed against yours several times and you couldn’t help yourself from thinking about the Knight when Hugo touches you.

This was something you would never get with him. You would never get to share a memorable moment with others, never get to rub hands against each other in front of three Queens, never get to look one another in the eye without shame or secrecy. The thoughts start to overcome your consciousness, causing you to play a sour note. No one seemed to notice, but you were more aware of it than you should have been.

A beautiful piece, carefully composed and rehearsed, performed with the intent to dazzle, the intent to impress. However there will always be the sour note, an incorrect chord that the audience might not hear but those giving the show will dwell on undoubtedly.

Like the Kingdom of Mandalore.

——————————————

“Rise and Shine your Highness!” A sing-songy voice calls out to you before pulling the long, draping curtains apart and letting the warm Mandalorian sun pour into the room. You groan and flip over onto your side, your body is still exhausted from yesterday evening and you would like to sleep in a little longer.

“Oh, don’t give us that.” A more brash voice groans and you recognize it as Koska’s. You can hear a number of other bodies file into the suite, maybe three or four. The handmaid's pull in the elven dress and a light breakfast. You can still smell the salt water on your forearm as you swing your hand over your eyes. You were not a morning person. Koska walks up to your bed before sitting on the edge of it, placing her tan hand on your shoulder. “We’ve let you sleep in long enough, we have to get you dressed and ready for tea with the Queens.”

“Queens?” You mumble, slurring the ‘s’ out.

“Yup, both Bo-Katan and your mother as well as the Queen of Naboo and Duchess of the Felucian mountain Kingdom are all eager to spend brunch with you in the Garden.” More guests arrived this morning while you were still sleeping, but it wasn’t until Koska explained to you about the women waiting for you that you remembered what day it was. You opened your eyes wide, flopping your arm onto the mattress beside you and looking up at her drowsily.

“The masquerade is today.” You say out of realization. She smirks and slowly nods her head. Soniee budges into your conversation, sitting on the opposite side of the bed.

“We have two dresses for you to wear today! This one,” She pulls forward a gown that isn’t quite as full and round as the dress for the ball, but is still a lovely dress with a pretty skirt and pearls embroidered into the bodice. “And of course the elf dress.” She nods to the pink and gold gown that sat on a sewing-bust, shimmering in the light. “We won’t get you into the ball gown until later tonight.” She hums.

“Now, we have to get you cleaned up, your hair is a mess.” Koska stands up and pulls the heavy down comforter from off of you. The loss of warmth elicits another sleepy groan from your lips and you stare up at the ladies in waiting frustratedly. “Up!” Koska’s serious voice commands and you’re scared enough of her that you jump up out of bed, pulling the nightgown sleeve up that has been slowly slipping down your shoulder and showing more and more skin. “That’s better.” Koska hums, “Let’s get you a bath, yeah?” She walks towards the bath room, opening the golden gilded doors and into the naturally-light room. You will always admire the beauty and effort put into the Mandalorian palace despite the internal battle with living here. You follow her into the room, still sleepy and walking slowly but eventually making it to the tub in the center of the room. The bath has already been drawn, which they must have done in your sleep (they’ve never done that before). You strip out of the cream-colored nightie and dip into the warm water. It smelled of lavender and honey and you allowed your muscles to relax into the bubbles. It was perfect, exactly what you needed to clear your racing and stressful mind. Your muscles were sore from yesterday and the warm water and flowery oils soaked them blissfully. You sigh at the sensation but before you can enjoy it anymore, Koska is dumping the warm water over your head, wetting it completely. It’s unexpected and you gasp from shock, your eyes glued shut to keep the water out of them. Damp hands come up from out of the water to wipe your eyes but then another dump of water is pouring over your head and you’re back at square one. Koska was a much harsher bather than Sonnie was.

All is forgiven however when she starts massaging your scalp, cleaning your hair. You relax back into the tub and enjoy the seawater and wind getting rinsed out. The other ladies come in, one on either side of the tub who files your nails, and Sonnie brings in a towel and silk robe. The other handmaiden works at your calloused feet with a pumice stone and you try not to let it tickle too much. It was true pampering and you loved every second of it. Usually there’s only one maiden to bathe you but five was divine. You assumed this was the treatment the Queen always received.

After you are properly cleaned, your Corellian tea is brought in and you’re left alone for as long as you like. You slowly sip on the purple shaded drink, waking up from it’s comforting properties. You sigh deeply, allowing the fragrant air to fill your lungs while you look out of the tall, narrow window in the center of the outside wall. You could not see the ocean from here, but instead the distant roofs of Keldabe. It was a beautiful summer day, there wasn’t a cloud in the sky and you could hear the birds who have nested in the nooks and crannies of the towers chirping. You knew you had a long day ahead of you, and you wanted to try and enjoy it as much as you could. You never really enjoyed the social aspect of royalty, and that’s all today will be, but you’re ready to brave it head on.

An hour passes before you are finally dressed in the first gown of the day. Your hair is braided back so that it will have a desirable wave for the ball tonight. You are snuggly tied into the pearled bodice of the dress, and you run your hands up and down the beading, allowing it to tickle your soft palms.

Koska pulls open the door, and you’re expecting to see the Knight standing there stoically as always, but he isn’t. The hallway is completely empty, in fact, and you can’t ignore the dreadful feeling that overcomes your body. Where was he?

You clear your throat, and look back at Koska, who was adjusting the skirt of your gown as you walked.

“Where is he?” You ask, your voice hushed almost to a whisper but not quite. There were a million possibilities behind his absence and not a single one of them was ideal. Koska lifts up from her crouched position, smoothing the front pleats of her dress.

“What?” She asks and you sigh out of frustration, there was absolutely no way she didn’t know what you were talking about but you had to be vague because of all the ladies in waiting listening in.

“Who will be accompanying me to the garden?” You say with a forceful tone, trying to prod at a deeper meaning to the question.

Luckily, Lady Reeves picks up on it, and she looks behind you. You felt like she was avoiding eye-contact and it only made you more stressed and confused. “I’ll be escorting you, Highness.” She nodded, moving a step forward and then taking the lead down the corridor. You follow hesitantly, and wait until you are far enough down the hall from the other ladies back in your suite to speak again.

“Don’t horseshit me.” You mutter behind her. She keeps her chin up high as usual. “He’s in trouble, isn’t he.”

Koska doesn’t answer.

“Koska, you promised me he would be okay.” You try not to let the emotion show through your tone but that was a challenge. You felt guilty for some reason. If he was in trouble, it would be entirely your fault. The words shake in your throat and maybe it’s the tight corset and the fact that you are descending the stairs but you’re out of breath and it’s hot, so hot.

“He’s fine, I swear to the stars.” She whispers, saying it straight forward instead of turning back at you in an attempt to stay calm and unsuspecting to watchful eyes.

“Well then why didn’t you tell me that?” You ask, twiddling your thumbs.

“I couldn’t… there’s more to it but-“

“But what? What could be so secretive that you have to keep it from your future queen?” You say through gritted teeth and immediately after, Koska is spinning around on the staircase and looking up at you with a furrowed brow. You felt like you were being scolded by an impatient tutor despite the fact that you out-ranked her.

“You don’t even want to be the Queen.” She says in a whisper-shout, starting to sound as angry and emotional as you were just moments before.

“You’re right, I don’t-“ You bite back.

“So why are you here, then?”

You aren’t sure how to answer, the obvious answer is for Corellia. You were promised something in return for your ability to produce an heir and look like a porcelain figurine on a high shelf. But you also knew it would make your family happy, and your Kingdom. You would be making them proud by marrying so rich. You made a promise.

But now you think you’re starting to stay for an entirely different and unethical reason. Something that is inherently a trap and you know it, and yet here you are, fussing over it at every change you have.

Koska rolls her eyes and scoffs before continuing down the stairs.

“Who spit in your porridge this morning?” You reply.

“You did.” She groans in response.

“I’m sorry, but what did I ever do to you?” You ask when you complete the steps down and start down another corridor, one section of the massive palace closer to your destination.

Koska is the one not to answer this time.

It infuriates you that everyone is keeping secrets from you, your entire experience in Mandalore feels built on deception and being left-out. And now, the two people who finally seemed to be on your side aren’t with you in one way or another on such a big day. Koska is angry with you for no reason and you have no idea where your knight is.

The rest of the walk to the Gardens is silent, and before you know it, you are plopped down on an uncomfortable wicker chair in the hot sun, sipping on lukewarm lemon tea and wondering how much longer you have to suffer. Your mother and Bo were giggling about something, the rest of the court buzzing with conversation and ignoring you as always. Was it possible that you were the problem? You ask yourself this after another sip of the tea, a lemon slice bumping up against your upper lip a few times. As you think, you hold the dainty cup against your mouth, losing yourself in thought without realization. Your pretty eyes stare down at the green grass of the Garden. The grass never gets green back home.

You start subconsciously bouncing your leg as you thought to yourself. Everyone seemed to ignore expect for Korkie and your Knight— who both want to fuck you. Maybe that was the only desirable thing about you. This wasn’t the first time you felt insecure about the relationship you have developed with the Knight. He’s so quiet, so different from you. Were you falling for a trick?

Was he?

Tea must have gone by fast because just before the pearls of your dress start to burn against your arms from the heat exposure, you’re excusing yourself and wandering back inside.

“Strange girl.” One of the noble ladies says to Bo when you walk away. You don’t hear it, you can’t hear anything except for your deafening thoughts.

“Are you sure she’s the one for your nephew?” Another asks. If you had known your mother was silent for all of this in fear of losing her reputation or even the deal between Corellia and Mandalore, you would have been furious.

“Well his father was an outcast, too.” One chuckles. “I guess you Kyrze’s attract the wallflowers.” A few hummed in amused response.

“Well his father wasn’t just an outcast, he was a downright scandal-“

“My sister loved him, and that is all that matters.” Bo interrupts. The laughter quickly dies out.

“Don’t tell me you believe in love, too.” One laughs.

“You aren’t married, what could you know of love?” The same one bo interrupted says.

“I do believe in love, which is why I am not married.” The Queen reiterates. “And I don’t think she’s the right fit for my Nephew, she’s too… outspoken. He needs someone who won’t outshine him.” They chuckle again, all do but your mother, who is still meekly silent.

“Well with the engagement Ball tonight, it is far too late to back out now.” One teases, and the laughter only grows.

Bo-Katan stares in the direction you left.

You huff down the hall, your arms folded and neck sweaty from the heat. You are looking back and forth, studying the layout of the hall in search of something. You’re looking for the smallest idea of where the knight could be but you aren’t very successful.

While all the fully armored guards of the Mandalorian palace are dressed identically, you are almost certain you would be able to spot your boy in a crowd of a thousand of them. You aren’t sure why, but there is something different about him, something that sticks out from the rest. Somehow you two were connected, and it made it so he was always plaguing your mind, even when you are with your literal fiance. Even when you are far away from him and have no clue where he is for the first time in two weeks.

Separation Anxiety.

You aren’t watching where you’re going, which makes you run into a tall, lanky boy. You yelp out in apologetic surprise, looking up at the person blocking your stressed search. A blonde boy flips around to look at you and you’re half expecting to see Korkie but it isn’t.

His Cousin, Hugo, looks down at you with his same charming smirk as always.

“Princess!” He bows.

“My apologies, Hugo!” You exclaim.

“Oh please, you are perfectly fine. You looked distressed? I hope It was not something I did?”

“Of course not!” You reassure, awkwardly smiling. “Uh- may i ask what you were doing in the center of the corridor?”

He chuckles, “Admiring this art.” He nods to an expansive, framed oil painting on the wall. It was of a tall man with a long face and alarming smirk. What stuck out to you, however, was that he held in both hands the same black sword from the royal portraits upstairs by the war room.

“The art is beautiful here.” You smile.

“Yes, my Aunt Satine worked hard to make it culturally rich.”

“Did you know her?”

“Yes, I am a bit older than Korkie, and I knew her for several years before she passed.”

“Are you… second in line?”

“I am.” He says with a classic amused smirk.

“So maybe you can answer a question for me, then.” You ask as you look up at the art. “What in the world is that?” You ask in reference to the blade.

“That, my foreign Princess, is the Dark Sword of Mandalore.”

“The what?” You cluelessly ask.

“A sacred weapon that the rightful ruler possesses, it’s rather powerful.”

“I’ve never seen anything like it before.” You look up at it in awe.

“Hah, yes. It is made of pure obsidian. The white is enchanted quartz veins. It is practically invincible, an elven Mand’alor forged it when he was just a boy.”

“What? There were Mandalorians who were part elf?” You ask, your eyes peeling off of the art and onto your companion.

He looks at you almost confused, “There is much you do not know about my Kingdom?”

“No… I’m afraid not.” You shamefully admit.

“Most don’t,” He shrugs and returns to the conversation unbothered, “It’s history is rather complicated.”

The two of you were quiet for a long time. Your eyes were glued to the stern face of the man in the portrait. You wondered who he was. Hugo is the first to speak up.

“You played beautifully last night.” You doubted he didn’t notice the incorrect notes and mistakes you made several times, maybe he was just being polite by ignoring them. You turn to look at him and smile kindly.

“As did you.” You return the compliment. He looks at you, and you must have been distracted by something other than him because you weren’t aware that his eyes were darting between your eyes and your lips.

Hugo forces a kiss on you.

Just like how Korkie did a few weeks ago in the library. It’s fast because you angrily pull away just as fast as he placed it on you.

“What?” You say like an idiot, looking up at him in shock.

“Oh come on, don’t tell me you don’t feel it?” He gets defensive immediately. The worst part is that it wasn’t even that bad of a kiss, much softer than Korkies, but nowhere as tender as the kisses the Knight would lay on you in the water or behind a closed door. Your entire body seemed to seize up, and you couldn’t get any words out. Not any words that you wanted to say. You just looked up at him, vulnerable and confused. He leans down to do it again but you’re able to turn your head to the side, keeping his lips off of you.

“I am… in love with another man.” You say, clearing your throat.

“You and I both know that isn’t my cousin.”

No use denying it at this point, “yes, but I am still engaged to him. I cannot just be disloyal to the future Mand’alor.” You mutter, embarrassed but trying to keep your cool. You knew you were lying, because you weren’t staying loyal to Korkie. No, you were outright cheating on him and you were falling in love with the boy you were cheating with. You were falling in love. You were very exposed, after all. Anyone could turn the corner or look through the windows and see you. It was different this time, however. Usually hiding your kisses are exciting, but that was only with the Knight. “Please,” You voice betrays you, and the emotional shake is heard through your clenched jaw, “Excuse me.” You push passed him frustratedly, making sure to shove him over a little with your shoulder. You angrily walk back to your room, finally getting there without help for the first time.

When you turned down the Corridor to your suite, you were hoping to see the beskar-clad boy who held you last night, but he still wasn’t there. You hold back emotional tears, but not seeing the one who brings the most comfort to you makes you break. Two crystal tears roll down your cheeks.

You have been taken advantage of too many times in this forsaken castle.

You pull open the door, the golden afternoon light reflecting warmly off of the gold-leafed furniture and decorations is a stark contrast from the bleak hallway. Your bed has been made, and things have been tidied up since you were in here last. You flop onto the mattress, your arms stretched out from your sides, looking up at the sheer canopy above where you lay.

Two hours pass. You think you fell asleep but you cannot remember. If you did, no dreams were had.

Soniee opens your door with trepidation after two soft knocks, “Princess, It is time to prepare for the ball.” Her voice is so timid. You twist your head to look at her, the other ladies from this morning were behind her. Koska was not with them.

You sit up from the bed, rubbing a crook in your neck from how you were laying...

—

authors note (again): i know this isn’t the best chapter ending but ya know... IT WASNT SUPPOSED TO BE

Anyways..... see you tomorrow? i guess? haha

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—

part twelve

[spasmsofthought]

rituals. (zuko x water tribe!reader)

+This turned out to be far longer than I anticipated it to be, but I couldn’t get this idea out of my head. I’m sorry if Zuko feels out of character; I tried my best to not make him so. I wrote him in my mind to be older than 16 and with, at least, a year of Fire Lord experience with him. All of the things he says in this fic may not be completely on point, but I hope I made sense of his character in this situation and kept an accurate frame of reference for you to hold onto! 

I’ve been thinking: What would it have been like to marry the Fire Lord if you were an outsider, from another nation/element? And where that question led me is what produced this. 

I tried my best to have accurate research, but if something’s off or wrong, please kindly let me know! I’m not an expert about the fandom here. 

Otherwise, I hope you enjoy this mess of fluffy Fire Lord Zuko and a Water Tribe OC just trying to navigate the way between two different cultures. 

Read Part II here! 

Like, comment, reblog! 

--

“Thank you.” You smile softly as some Fire Palace officials make their way out of the giant, ornate room. Their faces are more stoic, but there is one older man who gives you a slight quirk of his lips before they are back in a thin line. He’s been the only one who has been semi-kind to you. The rest of them have just been rigid and downright insufferable. It takes a few moments before their footsteps recede and you are surrounded by silence. 

It turns out that the Fire Lord asking you to become his wife comes with a lot more than you thought it would. 

And of course, you had never been blind to the fact that Zuko is of royal lineage. His family has passed down the title and office of Fire Lord for generations. The people of the Fire Nation have known this family for over a century. 

The blood definitely feels thicker than water here, though Zuko’s own familial situation may testify against that. 

How naïve of you to think any of this would be simple and easy. Nothing about this past century has been.

You press your head to the solid table beneath you, hand-crafted and polished so that it shines like the stars you remember seeing at night back home. Frustration and stress knit your shoulders together, your arms curling in towards your midsection.  

Deep breath in, the voice of your mother reminds you. You can barely remember her face now, lost to time, but her voice still somehow stays clear. You hope it stays that way for a long time. Now let it go, she says, too. 

If you close your eyes, you can almost picture your little family’s home. The sea squid hanging out to dry so that it can be prepared for supper and her bed disheveled but lined with furs that keep you both warm at night and during the coldest days. It’s probably empty now, a home to no one. 

You exhale, forehead still pressed against the table. You repeat the process a few more times, trying to somehow expel the tightness of your shoulders. The weight stays. Despite whatever you may lose,  being with Zuko is the closest to home you will ever feel now. 

You get up from your seated position at the table and move to a window, looking down at the picturesque landscape of a quiet pond garden. You lean against a pillar supporting the ceiling and try to absorb yourself in the peaceful scenery. You close your eyes and try to listen to the sound of the soft breeze rustling the leaves of the tree. You just want it all to go away for a second.

“Have they exhausted you yet?” A gravelly voice behind you asks. 

You turn to see Zuko standing in the open doorway. He’s dressed in all his formal attire, of course, but he seems to carry his own weight on his shoulders today. 

Idiot, you think, of course he looks stressed and weighed down. He’s trying to re-establish peace among four nations after the 100-year war his ancestor started. 

“Yeah, sure.” You mumble and smile softly. 

The moment doesn’t last long before you turn back to the pond, stomach churning now. The grief and the stress mingle together. You miss home, you miss the weather and wearing your furs. You miss your parents, who have been gone for four years; your father to the war and your mother to sickness. The ache never seems to go away, but it dulls when Zuko is able to be around. 

Zuko makes his way to stand beside you, saying nothing as he directs his gaze also to the peaceful pond, undisturbed by people or the noise of the outside world. 

Despite what you had been told about the Fire Nation your whole life growing up, and what you’d been told about Zuko during the War, you’d always appreciated when he did this. Despite his title and the lineage he carries, he’s always treated you like an equal. You are no less to him because you are female, and you are no less to him because you come from the Water Tribe. 

If it had been a few years ago, you wonder if he would have thought differently. Or perhaps he has always been able to understand honor more than most since he was a child, and that was part of the reason he was the one who was destined to be Fire Lord all along. 

You take in the side profile of his face for a moment, trying to gather the strength you’ve always had inside you.  

“I don’t want to worry you,” You begin, turning back to the view of the pond. 

It’s still and quiet and sounds like a great place to escape to in this present moment. 

“I’ll let you know when I can’t handle it,” His sardonic tone answers back. 

You know he means it as a joke, but there’s a stark truth to his words. He’s handled much more than a trivial conversation about what may be bothering you.

You take a moment to organize your thoughts so that you don’t come across as an emotional train wreck. Zuko has always seemed to have infinite patience with you while you express your emotions, but emotional intelligence is new to him as well. You don’t want to burden him with trying to figure out your emotions while he’s trying to cope with and understand his own. 

“I just... I didn’t know how difficult this would be.” 

“What?” He sounds a bit surprised. 

“Adopting your culture as my own,” Zuko opens his mouth but you stop him before he can even begin. “From a shallow frame of reference, I had always known your culture and your people would be different than mine. And the time I spent traveling back and forth from the Water Tribe to here when I was only your girlfriend gave me some exposure, but I didn’t know. Not really. Most of your people have been so indoctrinated by nationalistic propaganda that our union wouldn’t have really even been conceivable a few years ago.” 

There’s another moment of silence as you take a breath and exhale it. In and out. Zuko doesn’t try to interrupt the moment with platitudes or words of comfort, and that’s another thing you’ve grown to love about him. 

He doesn’t say something he doesn’t mean. It’s not in his nature to do so. 

In allowing each of you to struggle with the weight of your words and emotions, he honors your emotions without dismissing them. Sometimes, it leaves you speechless because the practice is so ingrained in him, there are times he doesn’t even notice he does it. 

“I can adapt. That’s not what I’m worried about. My people are strong because we are so willing to adapt to change, just like the ocean: strong and flexible. I can belong here without losing myself. I just don’t have anything to bring with me. There is no recognition of my culture, and since these meetings have started a few days ago, I get shut down every time I try to bring something into what should be the happiest day of my life.” 

You turn to him also and take a step closer. His expression remains neutral and you can tell it’s going to take some time for him to digest all of this. For a moment, you place your hands on his chest, clothed with the finest robes available in the Fire Nation. 

“When I said yes to your proposal, to the reality of a life with you, I meant it with all of my heart. I still do. But I have nothing tying me to my homeland or the place of my birth like you do here.”

He looks like he has a thousand things to say, but then the words fade away before they even make it out of his mouth. Zuko’s face turns back towards the outside, looking out at the pond as a soft breeze again disturbs the tree by the water. He always gets this look in his eyes when he’s in deep thought. The dilemma is less with him and his position as Fire Lord and more with how to integrate you in his world without making you “fit in” in ways you were never supposed to. 

“If I’ve learned anything over the past few years,” He begins, still standing straight and looking outside. “It’s that nothing in the world is right if there is no balance.” 

He reaches inside his formal robe and pulls out a box. Your brows furrow in confusion, because Zuko is not one to give gifts. 

“I was going to give this to you later, but it seems like the right time now.” He shrugs and hands you the box while a hand goes to rub his neck. 

He always does this when he feels shy or flustered. It’s kind of cute to see the “decisive Fire Lord” act like a teen aged boy. He had rare opportunity to act like one before. 

The box is like a square and a silk ribbon is tied around it. Your fingers work at the knot while you raise your eyebrow at him. You place the ribbon on the windowsill once it’s unraveled and gently pull the lid off the box. It may have looked inexpensive, but you never truly knew in the Fire Nation. 

The thing inside almost takes your breath away. It’s all blue, every single bit of it. 

It’s a betrothal necklace. 

You didn’t even know Zuko knew they existed, let alone what it would have meant in your culture if he gave you one. (Granted, he’s already asked you to marry him, but for the moment you dismiss the thought.) 

It’s true, most marriages are arranged by parents or parental figures in the Water Tribe. Most people at home are not as lucky as you have been to freely choose a partner, whether inside the Tribe or outside of it. Sometimes it seems a more hollowed out gesture when neither party is truly looking to get married for love. But the ones that do always give the necklace its meaning and purpose. 

“I asked Katara for some help,” He began to explain as you stare at the necklace. “I didn’t know what I was doing or where I should go, so she was the one who guided me. She gave me some ideas of what the carving in the stone should represent, but in the end, I came up with the design by myself.” 

Zuko rubs the back of his neck again as you glance between him and the necklace. 

The choker is dark blue as always, but the color gives you some semblance of peace. Blue isn’t a very prominent color displayed in the Fire Nation. Indeed, the stone fastened to the choker has already been carved into. The design is somehow intricate and simple at the same time. It is intimate without being gaudy or overdone. It is all blue and reflective of the culture you grew up in and the one you still carry with you. 

“You carved it yourself?” You whisper, not doubting the answer but still needing to ask it. Zuko just nods and your eyes well up with tears. He doesn’t even know how sacred this necklace is to you in a place where no one else will ever understand its full importance and meaning. 

“Will you put it on for me?” You hand the necklace to him as you also discard the box on the windowsill and turn your back to him. You’re thankful your hair is already tied back (still adorned with various blue beads from your background) as you sweep it to the side so Zuko can clasp the necklace around your neck. 

The weight of it is unfamiliar but grounding. It anchors you to the truth. It reminds you that no matter what marrying Zuko looks like, you carry your culture with you wherever you go. The way you treat others, hold yourself, and what you, hopefully, pass down to your children is far more important than what traditions you do or don’t adhere to in a ceremony. 

“I’ll talk to the officials,” He offers as he clasps the choker together. “You should be able to have all the customs that are important to you when we get married. You have always been my equal, but this time it will be a fact and not just an assumption.” 

You touch the stone with your fingers as you turn back to face him. The tears are already sliding down your cheeks, but you also give him a sweet close-lipped smile. He knows but he doesn’t. And that is what makes him so beautiful. 

You cup his face between your palms and feel him relax a little. Physical affection had never been a priority in his childhood or adolescence, but you can tell he’s starting to understand why you think it’s important to give and receive it. 

“Thank you,” You say, smiling wider. 

You close the distance and bring your mouth towards his. The kiss is steady and soft but also full of unrestrained emotion. Zuko gives you a second one before you both pull apart. He just shakes his head. 

“I think I’m the one who should be thanking you.” He whispers back as he brings you to his chest. 

He is home now, and that is what matters.