#you should also check out my original music while you’re at it

[websitewizard2005]

hey yo i made an unofficial music video for the most mysterious song on the internet/“Like The Wind” because i am obsessed with it. it’s partially inspired by MyHouse.wad. you should check it out.

[partial-prints]

If you love vampires, listen up!

Do you enjoy vampires, 80’s music, a healthy dose of homoeroticism - all with a theatrical flair? Well look no further, for I submit to you Dance of the Vampires.

(More cool pictures at the very bottom)

What is it you may ask? It’s a musical about a vampire who seduces a girl and invites her to his midnight ball - an offer she simply cannot turn down. The whole thing sorta gives Phantom of the Opera vibes, but like, wayyy less creepy (despite it being a literal vampire). I will say now that yes, Tanz der Vampire (the original title of Dance of the Vampires), is in German, but there is a full recording with English subtitles on youtube, so please don’t let that prevent you from watching it. Now if you’re still reading, allow me to elaborate on the 80’s music and homoeroticism that I previously mentioned.

Let’s start with the tragic gay romance, because I’m sure that’s what you want to hear about first. While not a main part of the musical, the main vampire’s son falls in love with - gasp! - the vampire hunter’s apprentice. They dance together, and with stage magic involving a mesh screen and an actor on the other side dressed identically to the apprentice, it appears as though the vampire has no reflection in the “mirror”. Of course, the feeling is not mutual, as the apprentice is only at the castle to rescue the girl, who he is in love with.

Now, onto the 80’s music. Surely you’ve heard of the song Total Eclipse of the Heart, or the singer Meatloaf (even if it was just his role as Eddie in Rocky Horror Picture Show). Well, the man who wrote that song and a majority if not all of Meatloaf’s work, was Jim Steinman, who composed the musical. The soundtrack contains a decent amount of electric guitar, even a bit of synth at parts, and all around just sounds awesome. However, he only had about a month and a half to compose it all, so he reused some stuff he previously wrote, including a couple Meatloaf songs and Total Eclipse of the Heart, a song he originally wrote for a Nosferatu musical that ended up not getting produced. It was actually originally titled “Vampires in Love,” so what better song is there to fill the place of a big love duet between the girl and the Count?

Tanz der Vampire is my favorite musical ever. I’ve loved it ever since Count von Krolock appeared on the screen and first began to sing, and you may love it too. So I implore you. Please do yourself a favor and check it out. I’ll provide a link of a full recording with English subtitles here, but it should also be the first result on youtube when you search “tanz der vampire english subtitles.” (That production also has Drew Sarich as the Count, my personal favorite.) I should add though, do not watch the broadway production because it’s terrible.

If you’re still not sold, I’m not sure what else I could say to convince you, but hopefully you at least found this interesting and learned something new. If you want to know more about Tanz der Vampire or would like to hear about other musicals about vampires, please let me know and I can answer any questions. (If even one person watches it because of this I’ll consider this a success, and if you do watch it please let me know because it would really make my day.)

And now I’ll leave you with some pictures of Tanz der Vampire as a last resort to convince you how awesome it is and that you should watch it. (I also put in the alt text the song each picture is from for anyone interested)

*ooo the set design and costuming have hypnotized you… you want to watch it now… do it for the vampires…*

[cutesyaddy]

From Foes to Forever (part one)

min ho moon x reader

a/n: i’m a very inexperienced writer so please bare with me 😭 

warnings: characters may be ooc (my bad gang 🌝) and im not that great with grammar but i try 🥲

-anything spoke in korean will be written like this, but so will any words being dragged out so i’m just gonna have to hope you’re smart enough to know the difference.

-anything written in bold is gonna be song lyrics

-‘example’ means it’s being thought, while “example” means its being said aloud.

summary: reader meets some of the main characters and makes some impressions. (idk guys just read 😭🙏)

————————————————————

Music blares through my headphones as I was discreetly bobbing my head to my favourite song right now, Lovers by Anna of the North (guys, this is a CLASSIC banger go check it out).

While anticipating the BEST part of the song, my eyes trailed up to a handsome—and I mean really handsome—guy walking towards whatever was behind me.

For a moment, my breath hitched, and I couldn’t help but stare at him while he moved, his stride dripping with confidence. He walked like he had a big ego.

I could swear he started to walk in slow motion when the beat finally dropped.

now i’m in the dark

show a little loving

His sharp features were captivating; I genuinely couldn’t pull my eyes away from him.

shine a little light on me

show a little loving

His eyes met mine for what was probably only like 2 milliseconds, but in that short time, his gaze sent a shock throughout my body.

I was pulled out of my trance when the boy bumped into the arm of a pretty girl sitting beside me.

I pulled off my headphones and let them sit comfortably around my neck as I watched these strangers converse.

I was a sucker for things like this. He was super hot, and she was gorgeous. He bumped into her, and now they’re going to have a little meet-cute and start their love story.

“Excuse me,” she grunted, craning her neck to look back at him. He stopped and turned towards her.

“Wait,” she started; I think she noticed something on his bag. My eyes followed her own, and they landed on a KISS keychain.

“Do you go to KISS? I’m going to KISS." Oh my gosh, it’s happening; they go to the same school! Coincidentally, so do I, but this isn’t about me.

He paused for a second. “no Englishshi” Oh, I guess not then. Before the girl could say anything else, I interrupted,

“Do you speak Korean?” they both spun their heads in my direction. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything; now they know I was listening.

“I think you should apologise man; that was pretty rude.” his position remained unchanged. “What's rude is you not minding your own business. Ugh, I don’t have time for you people."

‘Yet you had enough time to be walking so slowly?’ No, I shouldn’t say that; he’s totally right; I shouldn’t have gotten involved. Not everything is a kdrama.

I defeatedly watched as he took long strides in the opposite direction. “Hey, thanks for defending me, or what I think was defending me? I’m not sure; I don’t understand a word of Korean, haha! Anyway, my name is Kitty Song Covey! It's nice to meet you!”

‘Oh my gosh, what an earful.’ “Don't worry about it! I was just telling him he should apologise; I don't think he took it very well, though.” She stared at me expectingly.

“Oh! Sorry, my name is (y/n) (l/n). It’s nice to meet you, Kitty.” I held out my hand for her to shake out of pure instinct, but I instantly regretted it as it was such an old-fashioned greeting.

Without a beat, she took my hand anyway, which brought a smile to my face. “I couldn’t help but hear you are attending KISS?”

Kitty nodded her head vigorously. “YES! I’m super duper excited to be reunited with my boyfriend, who also attends KISS! He’s one of the reasons I decided to enroll!”

I blinked. “Are you travelling all this way and studying abroad for a boy?” Ok, I misread the situation earlier; maybe this was like a kdrama, just not the one I was originally expecting.

“No, of course not! It’s not all because of him. KISS was the school my mother attended when she was my age. I’m travelling to Korea to learn more about her.

“Oh, so you’re from Korea?” I was pleasantly surprised. “Yes! I’m half Korean.”

————

Lucky me! I made it just in time for the bus that's heading straight for KISS. Jeez, I feel a little bad for the students that didn’t get here in time; I would get lost trying to locate the school in this massive city.

My headphones were at home, snug around my ears, as they played my favourite tunes. Music was the only thing fun about going on drives.

I grinned to myself like a weirdo when my favourite—dare I say the BEST song of all time—played through my headphones for the hundredth time.

you told me i would never see you

walk away

With the familiar melody filling my ears while I stared out of the bus window, my mind wandered back to that boy from earlier.

said you’d never break my heart

never leave me in the dark

He sure was cute; I mean, he was sorta mean, but I'm kinda into it. What can I say? I'm a sucker for a good old enemies-to-lovers story.

i guess there’s just some promises

you shouldn’t make

I’m a sucker for all things romance, matter of fact. Ironically, though, I’ve never been in a relationship. I’m more of a third wheel, the audience, the viewer, the reader.

should’ve know from the start

now i’m in the dark

thoughts full of this nameless douche from the airport, I began to drift off, head bumping against the glass of the bus window.

SORRY IT WAS SO SHORT BUT I HOPE YOU LIKED IT

PART TWO HERE

[x-on-the-calendar-business]

ryan ross iceberg explained (masterpost and tier 1)

tier 2, tier 3, tier 4, tier 5, tier 6, tier 7, tier 8

if somehow you have no idea how icebergs work/what they are, then i’ll give a tldr: it comes from the saying “it’s just the tip of the iceberg,” so basically, the entries at the top of the iceberg are the stuff the average person would know, and as you go deeper, the content becomes more obscure. for example, if you’re a more casual panic! fan, then a lot of the entries in the sky tier are more likely to be things you would know, whereas you’re probably only going to know the stuff at the very bottom if you’re an insane person (me).

i got most of the entries from this iceberg from a couple of others that i found on twitter, here and here [i]. i combined them, shifted some stuff around, and added some things to make this one. of course, a special thanks to the twitter users areyouIlooking and checkyesjuul for making the ones i used to create this one.

i also want to give a special shoutout to the tumblr blogs @pathetic-at-the-disco and @prettyoddfever because i got so much info from them for this iceberg and they are just incredible sources of information for panic! fans.

finally, i'm really hoping everything on this iceberg is correct; of course, i did my research and there was a lot of it i already knew. however, i was not actually there for presplit panic! so i can't speak off of firsthand accounts for a lot of things. with that being said, if something is wrong, or if there is something you think should be added, please feel free to let me know, and i will go back and edit the post.

enough introduction, let’s get started.

the sky (tier 1):

guitarist of panic!:

what he is most well known for. ryan was the original guitarist of panic! and one of the true founding members. he departed the band in 2009 with former bassist jon walker, which we’ll come back to later.

rosevest:

this refers to an iconic piece of clothing that ryan wore while they were touring their debut album, a fever you can’t sweat out. he wears it in live in denver as well.

(side note: the post i got this pic from is a very interesting look at their outfits from that tour so i would recommend checking it out here!) [ii]

good at makeup:

during the fever era, ryan was really well known for doing makeup looks, some elaborate. i’m inserting some examples here, but i’m also going to link a post that showcases more pics of the makeup looks he did. there are more that he did than just the ones shown in that post or here (like the god awful blue eyeshadow he did on that red carpet), and there were a lot of times he just did the classic black smudged eyeliner.

and the tumblr post as promised: the makeup styles ryan ross wore in summer 2006 [iii]

ryden:

oh boy, where do we even start with this one. there are actually going to be quite a bit of ryden references in this, but at the end i’ll link a masterpost for further reading (although most of it will be covered here). but to be keep it short and simple, ryden is the ship name for ryan ross and brendon urie. it was arguably one of the biggest ships in early 2000s bandom, as evidenced by the litany of fics written with them as a pairing. this ship (unfortunately) still lives on in people’s hearts today even though ryan and brendon don’t speak anymore.

also, i know it would seem to make more sense if their ship name was ryDON not ryDEN because of how brendon’s name is spelled, but the ship name comes from the mashing of their nicknames ryro and bden (which still doesn’t make any sense but i digress).

unfortunately, all of the ryden content on this iceberg will probably be long because i am a former rydennie (yes u can make fun of me for it go ahead) so i have a lot of knowledge on that ship. but trust me i know that ryden was not real.

“creative differences:”

this entry refers to the july 6th, 2009 split where ryan and jon left the band. the most cited reason for the split was musical differences, as stated in these interviews with brendon and spencer [iv]. however, most people believe the band actually split due to personal reasons since they basically all stopped speaking afterwards, and because of some comments jon made [v]. in fact, one MTV interview specifically singled out ryan and brendon as not getting along, but it has since been deleted [vi].

cheez wiz:

this references a clip from the pretty. odd. short-film called american valley [vii]. the video went viral circa 2015/2016 and became a huge meme in the bandom community, especially in the crankthatfrank yeemo fanbase (that sentence wasn’t in the bible). if you were a panic! fan during that time, you know the cheez wiz jokes were inescapable.

milk fic:

“ryan was kneeling in the bathtub…”

this is also unfortunate. to be blunt, this is a ryden fic in which brendon gives ryan an enema with milk. it catalyzed a trend of other shocking fics within the bandom sphere, such as the comb fic. it’s just cringy. sadly, it became so iconic that brendon knows about it and even made a vine referencing it [viii].

i would link it but i’m not going to because the author, druscila, is a pedophile. so there’s that.

onceler jokes:

i’m going to put a picture of the onceler, who is from the lorax, and ryan side by side. and that should explain this.

now let’s move on to the next tier.

tier 2

references:

[i] https://twitter.com/areyouiooking/status/1366887508441718790?s=46&t=srOJ3YueMMsx9_sm96odQQ, https://twitter.com/checkyesjuul/status/1368794897499615233?s=46&t=srOJ3YueMMsx9_sm96odQQ

[ii] https://prettyoddfever.tumblr.com/post/628882839458512896/panic-at-the-discos-2006-summer-tour-costumes

[iii] https://prettyoddfever.tumblr.com/post/629161631117656064/the-makeup-styles-ryan-ross-wore-in-summer-2006

[iv] https://patd.livejournal.com/2943372.html, https://patd.livejournal.com/2928377.html#cutid1

[v] https://oneweekoneband.tumblr.com/post/131968366779/jon-walker-and-ryan-ross-from-a-2009-interview-in

[vi] https://whisperdlullaby.livejournal.com/9051.html

[vii] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBot_X9pquo

[viii] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyWlisnfrm0

[princeblue]

Why you should join ✨my✨ server:

Demon slayer themed, although it’s advertised for Shinazugawa Brother’s fans, everyone is welcome despite who their blorbo may or may not be!

Strict Rules against Bigotry, anyone is welcome regardless of Ethnicity, Orientation, Gender and Pronouns.

Strict Rules against Ship-Hate, everyone is guaranteed to ship what they want to ship without backlash, anyone who breaks these rules is strongly reprimanded if not outright banned.

Any talk of politics is banned within the server, as an individual I encourage everyone to use their voices to uplift others and speak out against what is wrong, but The Blue Corps is a safe space away from reality to get lost in fandom activity and talking with friends.

Sections for all manners of creativity, for writers, cosplayers, Artists, and even crocheting/knitting and cooking.

Rounding back to writers, we have four channels altogether for demon slayer fanfic ideas, you can spout off a random idea and see what people think, and ramble for hours if not days about a single or multiple ideas.

Other areas of writing include: a demon slayer themed RP section and a section for your ocs! They do not have to be demon slayer themed, we are all curious on each others thoughts and creations actively encourage you to ramble and create! As well as a Fanfiction Recommendations channel and a follow up channel to discuss the fanfic you have wrote or read.

For Artists we have the channel “Original Arts” for your own personal creations so they don’t get lost in our “Fanarts” Channel, we want to see what you make and for it to shine on its own!

We also offer game nights! Such as: Cards Against Humanity & Garctic Phone, there are other games, but they are yet to be played :) as well as music streaming channels and channels to hop on vc and chat for as long as you’d like!

We offer Serious channels such as: two vent channels, a debate channel, and a Sensitive Discussion channel. We are a safe space, and while it’s important to forget about reality for a while, it’s also important to get things off your chest and to have a support system, and we will offer it to you with open arms.

An 18+ section to talk about Nsfw Ideas, share Nsfw Art, both original and unoriginal, and share/discuss Nsfw Fanfiction.

And if you’re a fan of my works on Ao3, I send updates in the server for when I post new fanfics! https://discord.gg/FSh9urFVWa

I really hope you all consider joining, I’ve done my best to curate a demon slayer safe space where everyone can be themselves and feel like they can interact without being judged, I’ve made amazing friends from the server and its something I’m extremely proud of. And I’d be even happier and prouder to share it all with you!

[cooliofango]

When You Hold Their Hand Unexpectedly

Linked Universe V. x Gn!Reader

--------

My first little written scenario/imagine for Linked Universe! The idea for this one came from one of @lonelyrosegold ‘s posts ! Go check them out! I did alter it slightly to write these just so I can have more options to change it up a bit, but the general idea is still the same.

To sum it up here should anyone not be able to go see the original idea, the reader’s love language is touch, so when they’re talking with one of the other Link’s, doing something that distracts them, or something has your attention entirely, they grab onto the hand of whoever is beside them without realizing it because it feels so natural to them.

This is part one!

PART 2 HERE!

PART 3 HERE!

This part includes Legend, Time, and Warrior

—————

Legend

He looked as irritated as he felt. It was silly, though, even to him, but as he watched you walk beside Warrior with that bright smile as you two were in deep conversation, he couldn’t help but feel an annoying lump in the back of his throat that he couldn’t swallow down the more he stared.

Legend’s eyes were narrowed at the back of Warriors’s head. The only thing that made it falter was when he would look at you instead. He didn’t know what the two of you were talking about, and frankly he didn’t care, but he wished to have your attention the way the Captain does at the moment. Be the one to make you laugh like that with his own sarcastic quips that you seemed to enjoy quite a lot. The realization of him thinking that way only made him more irritated.

He felt that way any time he would realize he was thinking about something so sappy. Not that it was an entirely bad thing, of course. It just felt so out of place at the moment. Why feel this way now when you’re attention isn’t even on him and he’s not in your company?

You’re company was probably the greatest to have in his opinion— not that he would admit that out loud— so there was no doubt as to why Warrior seemed to enjoy it as much as he did. You were sweet and understanding when it came to interacting with everyone in the group. Yet it was also the strength you had shown while with them that made Legend all the more intrigued by you. A bonus was that you knew how to throw a sarcastic quip back at him whenever he had something snarky to say— even if it embarrassed him in the end.

Warrior clearly felt the same as he easily captured your attention as well with his oh-so charming charisma. Legend was clearly having a tough time doing so. Another laugh to leave your lips left him to bite back another frown. The laugh was like music to his ears. He questions again why he couldn’t be the one to pull it from you.

“So are you going to say something to them or are you just going to burn holes in the back of Captain’s head?” Sky spoke softly to the shorter Link with slight amusement lacing his tone. The sudden appearance of Sky nearly made Legend jump out of his skin and his cheeks burn red from having been caught staring.

“Keep it down, would you…!” Legend whisper yelled Sky’s way. The last thing he wanted either of them to know was how he was completely enraptured in something that didn’t involve him. It would just be more teasing fuel for Warrior, and Hylia knows what you’d think about it.

Sky raised his hands defensively, “Sorry, sorry…!” He whisper yelled back, “You we’re being a bit intense though.” Sky laughed softly as he walked beside Legend now.

Vet looked away with a huff of frustration to leave his lips. Was it that bad? Who else noticed? Did you notice? He hoped not. “My question still stands though,” Sky continued, “You should go talk to them if you want them to notice you.” Legend looked to him with furrowed brows.

Should he was the real question. He didn’t want to be the reason why your mood was dampened if you were having a genuinely good time with Warrior. Despite this, he couldn’t help but be tempted by the thought. At least he could walk by your side, right?

Legend sighed irritably to himself before picking up the pace. “Fine..” Legend grumbled as he waved off Sky from behind. You weren’t far ahead of him, so catching up to you wasn’t difficult. The blonde and pink haired Hylian stopped at your side with a quiet sigh of content to relax his shoulders. This was a bit better, even if the two of you weren’t speaking yet.

Maybe, if he got lucky, you’d notice him and engage in a conversation with him instead— or at least include him to some extent. You tended to blank everything else out when you’re deep in conversation, so he expected it to take a little while for that to happen. All he could do is wait for the time being.

He did his best to cancel out what you and Warrior were saying as you three walked in a trio now. He didn’t want to appear irritated if you were to notice him right then and there. Legend had been looking around the forest area that you all were traveling though when he felt someone grab his hand. His initial reaction was to express irritation at the sudden intrusion of his comfort. It was a feeling that died down quickly once he had realized who held his hand.

Your hand was gently, yet securely, gripping onto his. Your fingers were laced delicately together and your finger tips tensed and relaxed against the back of his hand every now and then as a subconscious way of expressing your emotions while speaking. Legend felt his cheeks grow warm at the sight. He tensed a little, for he wasn’t quite sure what to do. He looked up at your face to see what you may have been thinking in that moment.

To his surprise, you weren’t even looking his way! Your gaze was still on Warriors and the both of you were still chatting merrily away. Legend inwardly groaned. This felt even stupider. Why were you holding his hand?

Legend opened his mouth to speak his concerns, but caught himself before doing so. If you hadn’t noticed that you had company at his side, nor did you seem to notice your own actions, then why should he interrupt the current peace. Not right this second, anyways. Your hand felt nice in his own. They weren’t super soft, but they were definitely softer than his own hands. Not as many scars on them and they weren’t near as calloused.

So, instead of confronting you about the current situation, Legend looked away with a sigh of defeat. May as well enjoy it while it lasts.

————— Time

The campfire crackled lightly into the night. Embers flew into the air as the wind gently blew. It was only the sight and sound of flames that disturbed the peace as Wild finished up making dinner for the group. Everyone else, including yourself, did your own thing to occupy yourself during the wait.

You sat next to Four on the ground, listening intently. He spoke almost aimlessly, yet you were perfectly intrigued. One leg was crossed while the other was propped up, one of your arms coming to rest on top of the propped up knee. Your head was lightly tilted back to rest against the tree behind you and your gaze never left the shortest Link.

“The easiest thing to carry around with you should you ever get split up is a dagger— say about an inch wide and a few inches long,” Four continued on, a hand waving in the air as he spoke. He was in a similar position as you, though both legs were crossed and his other hand kept him upright.

“Cause it’s light weight and practical, right?” Your head lulled a little to the side curiously.

“Yes, but it’s also easy maintenance,” Four points a finger in acknowledgement before dipping his hand into his bag. He began rustling through the many items inside to find what you assumed was the small weapon in question.

You waited patiently with unbroken focus. Not even the delicious smell of Wild’s now finished cooking broke you in that moment. So much so that you hadn’t realized the presence on the other side of you.

Your free hand moved to that side, resting on top of the ground— or so you thought in that moment. Yet no one seemed to notice yet. Not even you.

“The blades are small but strong enough to be sharpened on just your typical stone. The metal used for most of these are easy to clean off too,” Four spoke as he pulled out the dagger he had and showed you the blade. You’ve only seen him use it a few times in battle when things would cut to close. It’s worked out well as far as you know.

“So it’s convenient too!” You smiled to yourself at the self proclamation.

Four smiled along with you, flipping the blade over in his hand, “Precisely.” The handle was out for you to grab now. Your fingers had just brushed over the handle when a familiar voice finally broke the conversation from continuing further.

“Ahem.”

You and Four stop speaking and look up at Wild who held a few bowls of the stew you prepared. “Are you two going to grab one or not? I’m not going to stand here forever,” He rose a brow. He hadn’t been standing there for too long— right?

You fully grabbed the blade with a nervous smile and quickly sat it down at your side. The other hand gripped onto whatever it held a little tighter.

“Sorry, Wild,” both you and Four spoke simultaneously as you each grabbed a bowl from him.

The Champion looked at you with a raised brow for a moment longer before turning to continue serving dinner to the others.

Huh…

“I suppose I can speak, as well, now that your done with your conversation.”

You nearly jumped, looking to the opposite side of yourself to see Time with an amused smile on his face. “O-Oh… Sorry to you, as well,” a now embarrassed chuckle slipped passed your lips, “What was it you needed?”

Time rose a brow and his grin grew just a little more as the situation grew more amusing to him. “Well, for starters, my hand.”

You blinked up at him. “What?”

You looked down at the space between you to see your hands placed gently together. His hand rested against the soft, grassy earth. On top of it was your hand, fingers snug between his like it was the most normal thing in Hyrule.

Your face burned and you practically yanked your hand away. “S-Sorry! Sorry— I didn’t realize I-“

Time’s laugh stopped your frantic apologies. The sound only made your blush deepen, although it wasn’t just out of embarrassment now.

“It’s fine, really!” He finally brought himself to speak as his laughter calmed to mere chuckles, “I didn’t mind it.” He sent a playful wink your way.

You looked away to hide the ever growing blush on your cheeks that began to stretch to your neck and ears. Yet there was a giddy smile tugging to your lips, as well as a fluttering heart to your ribcage.

“If you really want though,” You hear him speak again as you go to start eating in hopes to shrug off the incident. The spoon had just gotten passed your lips as he continued, “You can hold my hand some more once we’re done eating.”

You have to stop yourself from choking up, which you were thankfully successful at. Instead, you nod with a ‘Mmhm’ to slip past your sealed lips. You didn’t want to be rude or gross by speaking with a full mouth, after all.

————— Warrior

The heavy steps shook the ground around with each movement the large monster made. Neither of you knew why, but this Hinox seemed to be a lot larger and a lot stronger than the usual ones. Being that it was just you and Warrior patrolling this side of the forest, you both couldn’t take on the large beast without risking serious injury or death. So you hid.

You hid together behind the cliff side, jagged rocks sticking out from the walls and the ground near the mountain’s base. The forest had gone deathly quiet as the Hinox’s presence continued to boom throughout it. You could feel the ground shake beneath your feet whenever it got near you two. It didn’t seem to know you two were there, thankfully. Not yet.

Trying to find an escape route was difficult— not only because of the fact that the Hinox was still there, but also because they weren’t sure where the beast was looking to tell whether or not it’s safe to make a quiet run for it. Your eyes darted over to Warrior fearfully. There was a plea for help in them. “What are we supposed to do?” Your gaze silently screamed for you.

Warrior’s brows furrowed and glanced past you for a moment. His lack of change in movement and in expression showed how they were still in the clear for the time being. He didn’t make a noise, but he raised a finger to his lips and gave a silent “Shh”.

You swallowed nervously and nodded. Warrior moved to stand opposite of you and peer around the stone. A hand was raised in front of you protectively as he did so. You bit your tongue gently with anticipation. You were worried— you didn’t want to attract the Hinox over here, but you also didn’t want Warrior to get hurt trying to make this risky move.

Which way should the two of you go? You’d definitely would have to take the long way around to get back. The way back to the others was past the Hinox and going directly past him was out of the question. Making a distraction could work but, at the same time, it was risky too. The best option was to go the long way—

Warrior quickly moved back into hiding, his body tense. “Don’t move…” He whispered to you. The thundering footsteps grew louder steadily. The earth trembled under you in response, sending your heart to leap into your throat. You grabbed onto whatever was close by for dear life, looking ahead of you with quiet heavy breaths to huff past your lips.

Don’t move, be quiet. You continued to remind yourself of this as the steps came to a stop. The Hinox breathed and snorted loudly as it looked around near where they were. You felt whatever you grabbed onto tighten around your hand. The feeling mad your breath get caught in your throat. You didn’t have the courage to look down and see what it was just yet. You just hoped that whatever it was, it wouldn’t get you killed.

A loud snap filled the air. The Hinox growled to itself as it carefully back up and away from them. Wherever the snap came from, the Hinox seemed to go in that direction with heavy and quickened footsteps— it was chasing something. Something that went away from you and Warrior as the sound faded gradually.

Warrior peaked out again, and this time you followed. The back of the Hinox disappeared after a large dear that raced off in fear. You released a shaken breath you didn’t realize you still held. Warrior visibly relaxed as well, looking back at you to see if you were alright.

“Let’s head back to the others. We’ll need to warn them,” Warrior’s muttered quietly to you. The Hinox could still be near enough to hear them, so they had to continue be careful. You could only nod at the moment. It was a little difficult to regain your bearings right away, but you were managing so far. The two of you walked quietly yet swiftly back towards camp.

Legend was the first to notice the two of you, along side Four and Hyrule— but he was the first to speak, “What happened to you two to be gone for so long? Having yourselves a little date?”

Warrior’s brows furrowed at the accusation, “What are you talking about?”

“The fact that the two of you came back holding hands may have something to do with it..” Hyrule chuckled with his more kinder spoken words.

“Holding…?” You spoke, thoroughly confused.

Until you both looked down at your linked hands, knuckles nearly white from the tightness of the grip.

—————

Annnnnnd I hope this turned out well! I hope you enjoyed it! ^^

[katarinapaui]

The Beauty of Deviating Norms in Strange Magic

Katrina Pauline M. Samillano

Have you ever stumbled upon a movie you didn’t think you’d enjoy, only to find yourself strangely enchanted? That was me with Strange Magic.

Now before we delve into it deeper, would you believe me if I say that this is the leading man of the movie?

Surprised? Looks like a typical villain of an animated film, but yes. This is the leading man in the actual film.

Before we talk about it, let’s discuss the facts first because, by the end of this blog, I might convince you to watch this movie. Strange Magic is an animated musical film by George Lucas inspired by Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream, released in 2015. The movie takes place in a fantastical world divided into two realms—the light and the dark. It's a story where fairies, goblins, elves, and magical creatures interact in unexpected ways, all set to a soundtrack of iconic pop and rock hits.

I guess I won’t say a lot about the plot anymore because we want a spoiler-free experience in this blog.

Now, let me tell you a backstory when I watched this film for the first time. I was like… ”This movie is absolutely ridiculous! Who casts an ugly leading man and makes him end up with a beautiful young butterfly?”  Another thing, why did the girl choose a rock metalhead over a sweet romantic matinee idol type of guy? Well, I get that the latter has a cheating issue but my 11-year-old self (take note: 11 years old) would rather choose him than an ugly and scary-looking insect with a weird musical taste. (Disclaimer: I was young, okay. Please don’t judge me 😭🙏 it’s all different now, I swear.)

This movie actually received various criticisms in the past. This movie was released after the award-nominated and award-winning animated film, Epic. For some significant number of people, they believe that this movie is a cheaper copy of Epic. Well, plot-wise, the two were entirely different. But I can say that the animated elements are somewhat similar, though, not totally. Some also think that the oddness of the film is refreshing and the deviation of a typical image of a male lead is a bold move to do.

Well, if you’re gonna ask me about my opinion about the movie, personally, I’d say that it’s cute. It was actually the first animated movie I saw as a child that introduced me to the deviation of typical leading actors.

Usually, in the early 2000s, such as the generation I grew up in, leading ladies are depicted as someone soft, very feminine, like a Barbie doll. While leading men look like a handsome knight in shining armor, like a matinee idol.

This movie, however, defied that by representing a not-so-typical depiction of a man and woman. Although I believe that this movie is not for everyone, I still think that this movie is for me. Watching it as an adult makes me giggle because I can’t believe how (for the lack of a term to use) narrow-minded I was as a child.

I also love how the female lead had a strong demeanor in facing her cheater ex. I think she slayed the part where she knew her worth and walked out of the relationship and never looked back when she needed to. 

The thing that interests me most about this movie is the iconic pop and rock hits, reimagined. Walang tapon ang mga music! The artists are so good. All are so worth listening to. In fact, as I write this blog entry, I’m listening to the songs featured in the movie. You can check it out on Spotify, if you want. [Strange Magic (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)]

I’ve said it, but I’ll say it again. I believe that this movie might not be for everyone. But for those who enjoy movies like these—the one that deviates from the norm, you should give Strange Magic a chance. And when you do, let me know—did it enchant you as much as it did me?

[catwingsthespatula]

cactus ⇢ something you’re currently learning (about)?

papyrus ⇢ if you put your ‘on repeat’ playlist on shuffle, what’s the first song that comes up? what do you like about it / associate it with?

💗💗

I'm answering these out of order, for reasons that will be apparent very shortly.

Papyrus: I don't have a specific playlist on repeat right now, but when I put my whole music library on shuffle, the first song that came up was "Gurenge" by LiSA, which I enjoy for its fast and syncopated rhythms and intense musical contrast between harsh instrumentals and ethereal vocals. I primarily associate it with the last section of the novel Dracula, when the crew are split up and racing to catch up to the vampire before he gets back to his castle and/or Mina turns, because at one point I rewrote the lyrics to be about that so I could sing along after a fashion, because I don't speak Japanese (I did look up the translation and use the original lyrics as inspiration for my filk version).

Cactus: oh, boy. You're really gonna ask me that one, Thistle?? Fine. No images, but warning for text below the cut discussing genitals, damage to genitals, maggots, infection, gore, venom, and way too many spiders.

I recently read an anecdote about a man who tried to smuggle roughly a thousand Brazilian wandering spiders back to his home country of Whales by putting them in individual boxes in his luggage... including his carryon. Fortunately, the x-ray scanner foiled his plan, and he did not bring hundreds of minimally secured, highly venomous spiders onto an airplane. Reading this naturally led to me looking up the species on Wikipedia, which led to me checking the references and reading several case reports in medical journals of severe envenomation events, which led, in the way Wikipedia visits generally do, to me clicking probably a few dozen hyperlinks in the article I started with and reading the linked articles in full, clicking any further interesting hyperlinks along the way, at least partially because by this point I had in mind to inflict a similar venomous spider bite on one of her OC's (and still do). However. One of the more unusual symptoms of this particular venom is priapism, which is an erection unrelated to sexual stimulation that lasts for hours or even days. The ischemic variety, where blood is trapped in the penis and can't be circulated out to get more oxygen in, can be very painful and lead to permanent tissue damage--and even, in some extreme cases, penile gangrene. Yeah.

Anyway, I spent quite some time reading about the physiology, potential causes and complications, and medical treatment of priapism. Because I'm a writer. And because spider venom. I also spent a considerable time researching neurotoxins more generally, ion channels, classification of toxins, venom delivery systems in various venomous creatures, and--due to the nastiest of the potential priapism complications and the structure of Wikipedia hyperlink binges--types and classifications of gangrene. That led to reading about necrotizing fasciitis, AKA flesh-eating disease, which led to various other conditions that make your flesh rot off your bones while you're still alive, which led to the page on debridement and the various ways of removing said rotting flesh from a living person, including maggot therapy (which is actually so cool and we should be talking about it more--just maybe not at the dinner table. Unless you're me). At this point, it was well past midnight, and I finally went to bed.

Anyway, to everyone else who's reading this, Thistle knew perfectly well when she sent me this ask what my answer would be, because I was periodically texting her during this process. She sent it anyway, and, because my love for her is considerably stronger than whatever sense of decorum I may possess, I have answered. Sorry everyone 😂

If anybody still wants to send me asks after this, the ask game is here. Best to you all!

[fkitwebhaal]

Dark Urge Fic Recs Part 1

Hello! Do you find the Dark Urge to be super interesting? Would you like to read some fic about said funky little Bhaalist? Maybe even leave a comment or two? Well you can, given the power of my Dark Urge fic rec list!

My criteria for this list is as follows:

explored a part of the Dark Urge narrative in interesting and fun ways

uses said Dark Urge narrative to flesh out other characters and their responses to it

Thse fics are plot based. There can be sex scenes, but the focus is the plot.

There will be a part two to this list (I want to rec stuff for every combo of Durge/Origin, as well as dig up some Gen) but for now, here is what I got. I also write my own Durge stuff, but this isn't about me, so BEHOLD RECS.

Being the Urge is a fucking nightmare: Focus is on the struggle of being a dark urge character in the first place, any romance is really in the background

Anastasis: by Low_ Spaces

Rating: T

Ship: Gale/Durge

Summary:

They had been warned. Orin kidnaps the Dark Urge.

Rec: I love this AU. It has a fantastic depiction of the relationship between Durge and Orin and I highly recommend it. It's also does great work hinting at what is going on outside of our protagonist's POV.

Strong Ensemble: these fics vary in romantic relationships but they all contain a strong focus on the entire party as a unit. If you’re not sold on the main pairing, I still suggest checking them out for the dynamic relationships between the entire cast and a strong understanding of the importance of platonic friendships.

Cardinal. Sunrise, Morning Star: by @edelgarfield

Rating: M

Ship: Durge/Astarion with background ships

Summary:

It's a whole series and you should read it.

Rec: Absolutely fantastic series that shows how much the cast plays off one another. Each character gets a moment to play off Durge and those moments are beautifully written. While it's second person, this fic doesn't have a blank slate for Durge, instead the second person serving as more of a depiction of the Durge's mental state than anything else. I cannot recommend it enough.

Blood and Music Series by agrazza

Rating: T-M depending on installment

Ship: Astarion/Durge

Summary:

Tavran Gregory the half-elf woke up on the nautiloid with an urge to kill boiling in his veins and his fingers twitching to destroy. He drowns out both with his magic and music, but things aren't always that easy.

Rec: This is a wonderful series with a great look at the ramifications of Durge's entire situation and how that might play out. Durge's resurrection after the Bhaal fight isn't a quick fix here and Agrazza plays out the implications of getting stabbed in the head with thoughtful writing. The entire cast plays off Tavran in delightful ways. Where Agrazza shines in particular are their NPCs who show up in their post game long fic "On Darkness." A great read for those who want scenes that slice nicely into canon.

More relationship focused: these fics tend to look more at a relationship as their focus and how it works. Romance ahoy!

From the Jaws of Death: by Verelia

Rating: M

Ship: Astarion/Durge

Summary:

For all the ways he'd seen her carve bloody paths through their enemies, for all the times he'd watched her stand defiant against creatures that would bring most men to their knees - it most disturbed him to see her now, like this, twisted by guilt and self-loathing. It was the closest Astarion had come to looking in a mirror in two centuries.

Rec: As a general rule, I'm not a huge fan of fics that take Astarion's Cazador fight and add his LI as a target for Cazador. It just rubs me the wrong way. This fic is the exception because it understands this is Astarion's fight and doesn't try to redirect his trauma onto his LI: instead the Durge trauma here comes entirely from the Durge and man is it good. 10/10.

In Rapture, Ruin: by RM777

Rating: M

Ship: Shadowheart/Durge

Summary:

Bhaal’s voice rings throughout the temple, the vile and contemptuous thing. He speaks through that awful servant, and demands Vaszyne's loyalty. Shadowheart isn't worried, (and it feels good, for once, to trust someone enough to not be ready for constant betrayal) she knows the lengths her lover has gone to resist the temptations of her father. She will not give in, no matter what—this, Shadowheart knows for certain. Vaszyne challenges him, denies him the satisfaction of creating another monster to run amok Faerûn, another victim to a god’s ascension. "I would rather die." And so she does. or: Vaszyne seems remarkably calm for having died less than a day ago. Shadowheart is decidedly not.

Rec: You love to see a fic that understands the RAMIFICATIONS. This fic digs so well into the fallout from the Bhaal fight, how it would impact not only their LI who had to watch the whole thing happen, but Durge who just got super disinherited in the bloodiest way. I love the dynamic here between Shadowheart and Durge and it's that good mix of angst and hurt/comfort that feels like an excellent missing scene.

Recovery Series by @anxious-scrambles

Rating: M

Ship: Gale/Durge

Summary:

A fic digging into the aftermath of being Durge.

Rec: Have you ever looked at Gale and said "hm, this man needs a middle aged partner, not a 20 something (though the 20 something is fine too)." Anxious-Scrambles understands that assignment and has pulled it off remarkably well with Dreuer, and delves into not only the aftermath of adjusting from being a violent killer to a domestic lifestyle, but also adds the element of lost Bhaal warlock powers. Dreuer and Gale's relationship plays well to help explore parts of their character and this series really understands that "happily ever after" is work, not the ending.

[tessa-quayle]

FanFiction Recommendations

before I disclose my favorite Pedro Pascal character-related fan fiction here, a few caveats and disclosed biases: I’m a woman of a certain age.  I was your average English lit major.  I’m the dork who - upon listening to Jewel’s debut album and hearing the lyric “you can be Henry Miller and I’ll be Anais Nin” in the mid 1990s  - legit hauled my ass to the local public library and looked up Anais Nin - using the Dewey Decimal system - to read her elevated smut.  Right now I’m a content but exhausted, ragey American woman in a mid-life crisis.  I hate bullshit, I have an ok attention span, I scroll/read after the family’s gone to bed.  

if you look at my semi-neglected Tumblr page, you’ll see I’m relatively new to the Pedro fandom. ��What a privilege to dive into really superb writing.  This is clearly not an exhaustive list and reflects my tastes (and to each her/his/their own)!  But if you’re an exhausted parent in a mid-life crisis and have no time, this may be for you! 

in no particular order...

@fuckyeahdindjarin - masterlist - Cee describes herself as a writer who pens romantic comedies - and she does a stellar job with them - but she sells herself short and fails to mention the sex scenes she writes are hot.  especially love the consent series (dieter bravo), the grays 2-part series (frankie morales), and of course, the ongoing joel miller/pin series.  a delightful mix of angst, sweetness, spice.  and a thoughtful writer with an inclusive mindset. 

@absurdthirst - masterlist - if you told me Keri has a few stories published in several “best of erotica” anthologies, I’d believe you.  good smut is fucking hard to write.  this is great smut.  this is smut you read and then take a cold shower afterwards or do whatever it is you like to do to get yourself off.  it’s smut that even as a non-smoker and knowing all the terrible health risks you may think goddamn I need a cigarette.  I'm partial to a few Javier Pena and Agent Whiskey pieces, but you’d be satisfied reading any of her stories.

@something-tofightfor - masterlist - Rachael should give a master class on how to write the best slow burn.  Her Joel Miller stories stand out for several reasons including - 1) she thoughtfully incorporates elements of the original canon/game into her fanfic which is uncommon in the PP fandom (from what I’ve seen/read at least), 2) every Joel story/chapter is compelling and well imagined.  Her current series on Tim Rockford has me on the edge of my seat and I'm eagerly awaiting the next installment.  And judging from the titles of her stories, we have similar music tastes (ha!). 

@disgruntledspacedad - this writer hasn’t updated in several months, but their Javier Pena multi-chapter fic (and folks, there are MANY out there) called Better Love is the one that kept me going and going and wanting to read more (see mention of short attention span in a tired mama above).  being in the healthcare field, I also arch my eyebrows out of curiosity when someone weaves medical stuff into their writing and wonder what line of work they do.  (yes I'm a terribly biased nerd, I’m a sucker for when someone puts a f!physician reader into their PP-character related drabble).

@jomiddlemarch - she is a great friend and a gifted, amazing writer who always makes me wonder “how does she do this and how does she do this so well and so quickly while the rest of us plebes are just getting through our day.”  she writes for MULTIPLE fandoms (and judging from the notes on her posts, I think her readership is more into those than Pedro and the Last of Us but it’s ok!), and started writing Joel Miller and an OFC (she created!) named Grace Yang (NOT ME - but maybe there’s a chance she created this OFC to shut me up since I’ve been rambling on and on about how besotted I am with Pedro 😂).  If you’re into OFCs, read her stuff.  Check out the (ongoing) entire series on her AO3 here.  Here’s one story that you can find on her Tumblr.  Two of the five stories are Ted Lasso crossovers - all her stories are written so richly and so layered - she’s the star in your writing workshop who’s showing and not telling - I’m still thinking about how there’s so much to unpack in the latest one. :) 

[quinloki]

I bloody hate Tumblr, I didn't get to send the playlist in the ask so I'll send it again. (Assuming that you didn't get an ask about this one TT but, if I did send it... Just ignore my old ask and pretend you don't know who sent it since it was not an anon ask.)

Anyways, just wanted to say I love your fanfics (I read'em on Wattpad), especially 'Some Direction' and 'Just Like Fire'. At the moment, I'm reading 'Hat Trick' and I got hooked into in the first chapter. I haven't stopped thinking about it since work.

By the way, the playlist I made is quite mixed in terms of genre (K-pop, OPM/Original Pilipino Music, and Classical) and languages (Eng, Korean and Filipino), I hope you don't mind? Though, just in case, I noted down which is K-pop, OPM, and classical, including the language(s) they are sung in.

Sabo

- STARTAFIGHT by Joey Valence & Brae

- Hit and Run by LOLO

- What Do They Know by Mindless Self Indulgence

- I Want To Break Free by Queen

- Keep Myself Alive by Get Scared

Law & Crew

- Mary by Big Thief

- Bad Idea by Dove Cameron

- Bodies by Drowning Pool

- Barracuda by Heart

- In My Prison by IV of Spades [ OPM // ENG ]

Kid & Crew

- What's up Danger (With Black Caviar) by Blackway and Black Caviar

- PUNK! by BVDLVD ft. Lil Darkie

- Paint The Town Red by Doja Cat

- Kill Of The Night by Gin Wigmore

- Bad Reputation by Joan Jett & the Blackhearts

[ NOTE: I haven't finished Wano, I just started out, so I'm mostly basing this on my first impression during the Sabaody Arc. ]

Marco

- Under Pressure by Queen

- There Is A Light That Never Goes Out by The Smiths

- Memories by Thutmose

- It Took Me By Surprise by Maria Mena

- Familia by Nicki Minaj, Anuel AA, Bantu

Shakky

- Welcome To the Jungle by Guns N' Roses

- Captivated by IV of Spades [ OPM // ENG ]

- I Ain't Perfect by IV of Spades [ OPM // ENG ]

- Just A Girl by No Doubt

- One Woman Army by Porcelain Black

Rayleigh

- Smells like Teen Spirit by Nirvana

- Naughty Naughty by Porcelain Black

- Outta Get Me by Guns N' Roses

- Time Of My Life UPSAHL

- Egoistic by MAMAMOO [ K-pop // KOREAN ]

Kaku

- Stupid MF by Mindless Self Indulgence

- Figure It Out by Royal Blood

- Hunter or Prey by NOISEMAKER

- Revenge by (G)I-DLE [ K-pop // KOREAN BUT HAS ENGLISH ]

- Problems by Hayloft

Katakuri

- Violin Sonata in G Minor "Devil" by Giuseppe Tartini [ Classical ]

- Creep by Radiohead

- Glory and Gore by Lorde

- Are You Satisfied? by MARINA

- Misfit Lunatic by MISSIO

So I didn’t reply to this for a while because I needed time to check out the songs xD

Then I did and FORGOT TO BLOODY ANSWER THE ASK.

I liked a lot of these, my apologies for not having more detailed responses than that T-T - I’m pretty sure I added a couple and I know most of these are on my Liked list (so I can hear them again and again and see if they vibe more with time).

Thank you so much for going through and doing this with such focus \o/ it was helpful even if I apparently fever-dreamed replying >.<

Mom glad you’re enjoying the other stories \o/ and it should be obvious but I’ll say so just in case, I love all kinds of music, so there’s no disqualifications based on language ^_^ (also classical is great cause sometimes lyrics are distracting.)

[coulsons-fullmetal-cellist]

Looking Back

(Dieter x horror loving female)

Words: 967

Summary: while at an exhibition with your fiancé, you encounter someone from your past (check out my masterlist to check out the timeline)

Warnings: lost romantic potential, Dieter being Dieter, an underrated pioneer of animation gets a mention so please check them out before or after reading this

Artwork is a sculpture by Spas Kirchev

“I’m so glad you suggested this! Although you should have started with stop motion with shadow puppets.”

“I was getting there but was distracted by all the history stuff. I did get you interested with early German cinema though.”

“That’s true.”

The two of you were having a date night. Your fiancé Dieter had mentioned an exhibition by some animation students presenting their final year project.

The theme was Lotte Reiniger, a pioneer of the animation world who used shadow puppets as her medium. These students were to pick a piece of music and create their own short films inspired by Reiniger. Several clips from her over 40 films were dotted around the exhibition in between a few small alcoves where the students’ films were being presented.

You just came out of one short film based on the legend of Orpheus and Eurydice. The small dark space encouraged much snuggling.

“Look,” Dieter pointed out to a screen on the wall. “The Adventures of Prince Achmed is the oldest surviving feature length animated film. It predates Snow White by a decade. Then Walt went and stole her ideas and never gave her credit, the bastard.”

“I thought you loved Disney.”

“I love the films but the man himself? Don’t get me started on his original idea for Epcot.”

“You are adorable when you’re in history mode.”

“Not sexy?”

“A little bit. But you’re always sexy.”

“You’re always sexy.” You tried to brush off this compliment but stopped dead in your tracks and hid behind his broad back. “What is it honey cakes?”

“I just saw someone from my past.”

“From New Zealand?”

“No, from when I first moved here. I made friends with this guy called Orfi.”

“Orfi?”

“It’s short for something, I never asked though,” he turned around to face so you could continue. “We became fast friends, always having the randomest conversations and hanging out occasionally but then he just dropped out of communication. It was only later I found out from other friends that he got himself a girlfriend. Her name was Dizzy or Dolce, or something.”

“What a dick,” you shrugged. “Wait, did you have romantic type feelings for him?”

“I don’t know. I don’t think I trust myself enough to see if it was going in that direction. When I look back on it, there was a possible maybe but by that time, it was too late.”

“Were you ready by the time we met?”

“We met at the right time,” you looked over at your former friend. “I should really go and say hi to him, but I’ll go alone; you might be too distracting.”

“Because of my devilish good looks?”

“That too, but also you’re an award-winning actor.”

“Is that all anyone focuses on?” you patted his shoulder as you made your way over.

You must have willed yourself over there, the ground feeling like mud under your feet. Your hand felt heavy as you raised it into a wave, catching his attention.

“Oh hey, fancy seeing you here.”

“Well, you know it’s early German cinema so…”

“Yeah, couldn’t help but think of you.”

All those past emotions hit you like a sudden wave in the ocean. You tried to not get caught in the current and be lost in the past and decided to go forward with the conversation.

“How is…sorry, I forgot her name.”

“Disay? Oh no, we’re no longer together.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, it didn’t work out. Looking back, we just weren’t meant to be together. Now I’m single for the first time in a long time,” the laugh was awkward. “Let me guess, you’re still single?”

“No, I’m with someone.”

“Is it serious?”

“We’re getting married so yes, it’s very serious.”

“Oh, uh, congratulations.”

“Thanks,” you looked at the ring on your finger, not noticing the look of sadness on his face which had gone by the time you looked back up. “It was nice seeing you.”

“Yeah, you too.”

“I’ll message you some time.”

Those emotions you thought you had were gone like the tides of the ocean. You waved a small goodbye and tried to not make it look like you were rushing back into the safety of your fiancé’s arms.

“He looked like an Eeyore.”

“Did he?”

“Almost like you were the one that got away.”

“Was I?”

“I think you were. And you know what, fuck him.”

“Yeah, his loss.”

“He was too stupid to realise he had the most amazing, beautiful, caring…”

“Dieter, we don’t need to go through the alphabet.”

“Well, an alphabet list of what makes you, you and he was an idiot to see you.”

“I’m glad I have you, I think I made the better choice. Definitely the most handsome choice.”

Dieter gave a small cursory glance over at the other man. “He has a bit of an Oscar Isaac look about him.”

“He does now that you mention it.”

“Wait, you know who he is?” you nodded. “I thought you only knew actors if they were in a horror film.”

You gave him that look that he knew oh too well.

“Okay, what horror films has he been in?”

“Annihilation, that’s the one with the scary bear,” Dieter shuddered at the thought. “I think Ex Machina is more of a thriller.”

“Those dance moves were thriller,” you looked at him in surprise. “I’ve seen the clips.”

“And you’ve learnt the moves?”

He held you close, almost as if he was about to launch you into a waltz, “Of course I have.”

“You want to show me some other moves, don’t you?” he mumbled something affirmative into your lips.

So he took your hand and led you out.

As you left the exhibition, neither of you looked back. You only had the future to look forward to.

Lovingly tagging @boliv-jenta @simpingcowboy @ellenmunn @o-sacra-virgo-laudes-tibi @chaithetics @myloveistoolittle @cevans-is-classic @glshmbl @cupcakehp @gswizzsstuff

[obligitory-fma-blog]

I watched the final Netflix adaptation of FMAB. Here’s some of my notes

- “Y’know, I don’t think he has any need for his dad.” Hoenhiem. Uhm you left him he kinda did for a while so idk why you’re being bitter now

- YOOOOO SIG AND IZUMIIIIII

- RAHHHH I LOVE THEM

- Okay the fighting is better this time, less choppy

- Izumi’s actress is ON POINT I LOVE HER

- “I was never much of a proper parent to either of those boys” Ya don’t say. (I’m not a Hoenhiem hater, but I am a Hoenhiem critic.)

- “Maybe you should’ve told them goodbye and talked to them before leaving. Maybe then their grief wouldn’t have taken over.” SAY IT IZUMI

- “I reorganized your insides lol” Hoenhiem you could tell Izumi before you did that?? Creepy man.

- Still didn’t use the music from the original :(

- Okay Ed should be covered in blood after falling into it but he isn’t, just his head bandage. Wtf is up with that??

- GIRLIE I CANT WITH ENVY RN WTF

- WTF IS THE CGI OF THE HUMANS ON HIS MANE (?)

- EW IT GOT WORSE

- Okay how tf did envy knock them onto a stone platform that was LITERALLY NOWHERE TO BE SEEN UNTIL NOW

- Mustang and Riza my beloveddddd

- The actor for General Hakuro is pretty good tho, very weird, but good

- Girlie you walked into some weird shit

- Mustang girlie I luv you so much tho hope you slay this movie

- Oh hi Father

- “Daddy…?” -al “DO I LOOK LIKE YOUR-“ -father

- Also highkey the actor for Envy is really good too

- “How do you know Hoenhiem?” “Technically he’s our father” TECHNICALLY HAHA

- Ed is like “touchy no no, no touchy”

- Girlie you are a creep HANDS OFF THE LITTLE GUY

- Ed’s just like >:/ wtf get off

- WHY ARE YOU PETTING HIM???????

- I feel violated just watching this

- YEAH LING SAVE HIM

- YOOOO WERE GONNA SEE GREEDLING :D

- Ew that’s fuckin goopy (philosophers stone)

- It looks like melted jello ewwww

- Okay idk if seeing greedling is worth it for this shit

- Why is his mind blue???

- Wait did we see greed lose his body in the first one or….

- I don’t think we did???

- Uhhhh idk and I don’t wanna go check because the first one is bad

- Lowkey he’s fine as hell tho

- Mustang looks so damn done lmao

- HE’S SITTINF LIKE THE SHINJI MEME WAIT

- LMAOOO THATS SO GOOD

- okay okay it’s time for me to get my Mustang being a dad moment don’t fail me now movie

- Stfu Bradley no one cares

- WTF WHERES MY MOMENT HELLO

- ARE WE NOT GONNA GET THE 520 CENZ PROMISE??

- I HATE THIS

- Okay Ed, Sig, and Izumi get to interact now :D

- Okay so now we’re getting the scar brother research moment? Outside of Briggs? Cool? I guess?

- Oh hi greedling

- Okay so apparently father killed greed cause he disobeyed him but that’s all we get for that.

- Also this story set up just doesn’t and will never work as well as the first one, so much stuff is intertwined in different events and mixing it all up like this just makes it so confusing and that’s part of the reason why this just doesn’t work

- But I’ll ignore it for the sake of things

- OLIVIER :D

- Mustang and Riza checking in on their kids :D

- I’m so normal about found family

- 5 minutes in Briggs and Ed is already in trouble. In character stuff

- Also we gonna talk about his automail or we just gonna skip over that for plot reasons

- OLIVIER I LOVE YOUUUUUU

- WOMEN ARE HOT

- am I bi

- YESSS ICE QUEEN ICE QUEEN

- “How’s Alex?” “He’s good!” “…shame.”

- Okay sloth looks less weird than I imagine

- OLIVIER WITH THE BOMB :D

- Love her what a Queen

- Still wish they used the original soundtrack I will forever be mad about that

- SLAYYY OLIVIER YASSSSSS

- please marry me

- YEAHHHHHH

- Okay Ed just kicked sloth off of briggs? Girlie even with automail I doubt he could kick him that easy

- So Olivier doesn’t suspect Ed of anything? Out of character, #notmyicequeen

- Also turns out Hakuro and Raven are both the same person in this version??

- Oh Hi Winry

- “If I step out of line, they’ll do something to you.” Awww baby protect your gf

- YEAHHHH OLIVIER AGAIN :D

- “I won’t let anyone do whatever they want in here!” SAY IT GIRLIE YEAHHH

- please I’m begging you marry me

- on my KNEES

- They could not have casted her better

- Bb girl it’s so hard to understand you when you’re so fine I can’t focus

- Okay now Drachama is attacking Briggs

- When Sloth goes back in the hole Raven/Hakuro looks like a grandpa when he’s told he can leave the nursing home for the day to play golf and if that isn’t a summary of the entire us government idk what is

- AWWW WINRY HAS A CHARM ON HER BAG THAT LOOKS LIKE DEN :D

- Sorry Olivier, but it’s so hard to focus on this serious scene with your luscious lips and beautiful face

- She would murder me for saying this all but IDC IF TJAYS HOW I GO THATS HOW I GO

- Alphonse!! :D

- Hoenhiem is like “hUH???”

- He didn’t know about Al’s body????

- Okay bestie :/

- Father of the year fr

- Can’t even keep up with the fact that his son doesn’t have a body smh

- Okay Xerxes time

- ED IS THE SAME ACTOR FOR YOUNG HOENHIEM???

- Okay I get why

- BUT OKAY THEN IG

- Okay cool Xerxes sequence

- “Everybody is dead” lol cringe get good

- Sorry I have the humor of a middle schooler

- Oh hi Greedling

- Am I bi cause THIS MAN

- Okay now it’s Al!Pride time just out of nowhere for no reason?

- “So you’re gonna try and beat me then?” -Pride

- “… nah you’re freaky lol” -Hoenhiem

- Hi again Al

- “Don’t insult my son bitch” okay we love that

- “Okay, let’s all go beat the dwarf in the flask :D” -Hoenhiem

- “NO ONE FUCKING ASKED UGH” -Ed

- MUSTANGGG LOOKIN SPIFFY

- Still mad we don’t get the 520 cenz promise

- AHHHH BLACK HYATE

- LUV HIM

- Also seeing Mustangs team all together is so slay :D

- “Don’t die while we overthrow the government y’all.” -Mustang

- Oh great bad cgi soldier things

- YEAHHH MUSTANG SAVE YOUR SON!!

- Okay good Envy and Mustang will fight :)

- Now it’s time for CRAZY MUSTANG :D

- BURN THE BITCH BURN HIM

- ED LOOKS SO SAD AND CONCERNED :(

- YEAH RIZA STOP HIM STOP HIM

- YEAH ED STOP HIM

- “GIVE IT TO ME FULLMETAL NOW! OR ILL BURN OFF YOUR LEFT ARM!” ANGST ANGST ANGST

- “JUST TRY IT! GO AHEAD! ILL THROW DOWN WITH YOU NOW!” YEAHHHH SAVE YOUR DAD!!

- “YOU PLAN ON STANDING AT THE TOP OF THIS COUNTRY LIKE THAT?!” CRYINF SCREAMINF RAHHHHH

- “YOU KNOW THIS ISNT WHAT YOU WERE STRIVING FOR” PARENTAL!ROY AND ED PEOPLE WE ARE GETTING FED TONIGHT

- YEAH RIZA AND SCAR STOP HIM :D

- The way Ed got ready to fight when Mustang looked like he was going to snap at him I :,)

- “I am a giant fool forcing you all to act this way.” HUG YOUR WIFE AND SON

- “Lieutenant, please lower your gun. I’m so sorry” GONNA CRY NOW

- I still wish we got the 520 cenz promise and I will never not be bitter about that

- I don’t care that it’s not the point of this IM STILL MAD

- OOP BYE ED

- AWWW MUSTANG CALLING FOR ED BEFORE HE GOES :,) WERE GETTING FED GUYSSSS

- Okay I don’t like the fight between Bradley and Fu as much this looks more like stage fighting :/

- That’s the only one so far I didn’t like tho so….

- How tf is Riza gonna survive tho the weird doctor guy isn’t here

- DONT LOOK DIRECTLY AT AN ECLIPSE GUYS WHAT???

- Also those do not go that fast either

- I got to see one and it was really slow but fun ig

- Idk I was like 13 so

- Anyways

- YEAHHH ED HELP YOUR DAD!!!!

- Okay I wish they added colored contacts for this or smth so it’d be similar to the series and make more sense but eh… who knows

- ED YOU GOTTA KEEP HELPING HIM HE CANT SEEEEE

- or get revenge that works too

- Okay cgi for the absorbing god scene is cool

- Alright who’s ready to fight god?

- Am I hallucinating or is the actor for Al also the actor for god!father/Dwarf???

- IM NOT THATS HIM

- OKAY IG

- All the actors for this are really good actually. I can tell they have passion for this. I appreciate that.

- Okay it’s time for Ed to almost die for the 5000th time

- YEAH MUSTANG FUCK HUM UP

- YEAH EVERYONE!!!

- POWER OF FRIENDSHIP YIPPIE

- Also someone get Ed. Or don’t

- Nah cause the creepy guys gonna get him now

- AL

- THIS SCENE WILL NEVER NOT BE SAD TO ME

- DONT TOUCH THE CHILD WEIRDO

- It’s funny cause when I got into this I was younger than Ed and now I’m older than him. Fixation really be lasting a while. It’s the neurodivergence isn’t it.

- YEAHHH NOW WE GET HIM BACK TO HIS BODY :D

- I can’t even tell if it’s good because the series is good or if this is actually a good movie

- Oh hi greed I forgot about you lowkey

- But you’re hot so hiiiiiii <3

- “YOU DARE DISOBEY YOUR FATHER?!”

- “ITS A LATE-STAGE REBELLIOUS PHASE IM GOING THROUGH!”

- Iconic.

- And get punched idiot

- OKAY TIME TO BRING BACK AL

- YEAHHH HOENHIEM TAKING RESPONSIBILITY

- “Let me at least do something fatherly in the end” AHHHHH

- “STOP BEING A DUMBASS DAD” AWWW ED

- “You finally called me dad 🥹” I CANT VISIBLY REACT I DONT WANNA DISTURB MY ROOMMATES BUT AHWHWIWJEVRI

- “I was always a human to begin with. All is one, one is all. Even if I can’t use alchemy, I have great people in my life. My precious friends and family.” STILL THE BEST QUOTE FOREVER

- YEAHHHH RIZA AND MUSTANG WILL FIND A WAY TO GET HIS EYESIGHT BACK

- AWWW WE GET A TRISHA AND HOENHIEM SCENE

- YEAHHH THE BROS COME BAVKKKDHIHZHW

- AND WE SEE HUMAN AL WITH SHORT HAIR

- AWWWWWIEHJEIEHWHWH

- IM NOT NORMAL ABOUT THIS EVER

Conclusion: yep. This got me in the heart, even if it isn’t the show itself. Still stuff that bothered me. But overall, this series of movies is not so bad. Not so great, at times, but not so bad. Honestly, I think they did the best they could and that’s really all I could ask for. And it was nice seeing them all in live action. For this movie, an 8/10. For the series of movies? 6.5/10. Not remotely comparable to the original series, but still a worthwhile watch and something I’d recommend if you want a recap of the series but don’t have time to watch it all again.

Let me know if you all want notes on the first one! I watched it a long time ago but I’ll do it again for y’all. Much love guys <3

[camplofi]

187 - Testing The Waters

All comments, questions, and general feedback can be sent to radiobsots@gmail.com.  Record a voice message and send it my way or leave one at the Speakpipe page!

You can subscribe to Radio BSOTS via the following options: RSS feed ||| Apple Podcasts ||| Spotify ||| Mixcloud Amazon Music ||| Goodpods ||| TuneIn ||| iHeartRadio

Connect with Camp Lo-Fi via social media: Twitter | Facebook | Instagram

This episode's track list (title / artist / source / license):

1.  Happy Birthday ccMixter by J.Lang featuring Snowflake [ccMixter] (CC-BY) (2024)

2.  Thanks For The Memories (Featuring Belle McNulty) by CM aka Creative [blocSonic] (CC-BY-NC-SA) (2024)

3.  drain the sun by niteffect [Bandcamp] (CC-BY-NC-ND) (2022)

4.  Over by Suhov [Free Music Archive] (CC-BY-NC-ND) (2008)

5.  Whenever You Wanna Call Me by Comfort Fit [Free Music Archive] (CC-BY-NC-ND) (2005)

6.  Out for a Shrink Pink Drink by Apes On Tapes [Free Music Archive] (CC-BY-NC) (2010)

7.  Configurate by Proviant Audio [Free Music Archive] (CC-BY-NC-ND) (2009)

8.  1000 Miles by Bluntspeakers [Bandcamp] (CC-BY-NC-ND) (2010)

9.  Soul Groove! (Patience) by !Mc'Lain! [Jamendo] (CC-BY-NC-ND) (2022)

10. The Holowaka Hides in the Shadow of the Sun by Fields Ohio [Bandcamp] (CC-BY-SA) (2024)

BSOTS BONUS TRACK:

11. Train Rides - In Praise of Black Men by Nikki Giovanni [Free Music Archive] (CC-BY-NC-SA 3.0) (2009)

If you're reading this, it means that you made it out of 2024.  Happy New Year and welcome to Camp Lo-Fi.  I hope and pray that you will be able to experience peaceful moments and great music throughout this year.  I pulled this episode together as 2024 was coming to a close, making this the first sonic statement for Radio BSOTS in 2025.  To kick off a new year of the podcast, this episode and the next episode will focus on my participation in the Netlabel Day Radio live stream marathon that took place in July of last year.  I initially recorded a 30-minute test run for the stream and figured that I should share that with the listeners.  

I gathered together some Creative Commons tunes from indie labels that ended up releasing later works under full copyright as time went on, but are still imprints that I hold in high regard (namely Tokyo Dawn, Budabeats, and Error Broadcast).  All cuts played during the test run can still be found online via Jamendo, Bandcamp, and the Free Music Archive.  This set of music leans heavy on the sounds of international beat culture, particularly that first decade of the early 2000s where the lines between electronic music and hip-hop production got blurry (and for the better, in my opinion).  Selections from Comfort Fit, Suhov, Bluntspeakers, and Apes On Tapes are probably the best examples of this.

Outside of the test run, the show opens with a selection in honor of ccMixter turning 20 years old (featuring the voice of Madam Snowflake - check out this video for a snapshot of her artistic journey) and closes with an addictive head-nodding joint from Fields Ohio.  I also get to share some listener feedback this time around.  As a bonus, I couldn't let the episode end without the words and voice of the late, great Nikki Giovanni.  As always, I welcome your interaction and hope that there are some selections within this installment of the podcast that grab your attention and increase your curiosity about other gems that can be found within the world of Creative Commons licensed music.

Theme music by Cy Tru (edited by Macedonia).  Background music by Techniken Defunkus.  ID drops from Morganics and Jonny Sonic.

Other key info: Macedonia on Mixcloud BSOTS show #178 - Creative Commons Gems From Public Enemy And Nikki Giovanni BSOTS show #181 - Creative Commons Sightings Of Kool Keith And DJ Harrison BSOTS show #186 - Download While You Can Netlabel Archive Funkwhale Castopod Tha Bloc Report

The content of this show has been released under a CC-BY-SA license.  All works within this show retain their original releases.  See the show notes at bsots.com for more information.

Another BSOTS podcast episode for the people...

[dragonologist-writings]

Title: Just Trouble Fandom: Pillars of Eternity Rating: G Status: One-Shot Characters: Original Character (Makali), Captain Aeldys Ships: F!OC/Captain Aeldys Additional Notes: TTRPG Character, OC Backstory, Flirting with Pirates Word Count: 1300 Summary: While at Fort Deadlight, Makali runs into an old flame. Between the rum on her lips and those taunting eyes, she just might give in to the temptation she brings.

read below or here on AO3

It’s already a rowdy night at the Deadlight Court by the time Makali swaggers in through the doors.

Yes, it's true that most nights on Fort Deadlight could easily be called rowdy- the combination of booze and bawdy music and bands of pirates will do that- but tonight, there’s something extra to the revelry in the air, and Makali senses it instantly. Cheerful shouts greet her as she steps inside, and she grins back at the familiar faces in the room as she makes her way to the bar. The music filling the room is familiar as well, and she hums along, her smile growing as she finally recognizes the reason for the raucous atmosphere. She glances to the corner of the tavern and sure enough, Benweth is seated at the harpsichord, belting out a drinking song with his crewmates, all of them already deep in their cups.

How’s that for a stroke of good fortune?

Makali orders herself a rum, then turns to scan the room. Benweth’s presence is a welcome surprise, though not really for his own sake. He does play a good tune, but Makali is far more interested in the company he likely arrived with.

And…ah, there she is, leaning against the wall on the opposite side of the room, her mismatched eyes already fixed on Makali and a coy smile on her lips. Makali returns the smile with one of her own, tosses her long braid over her shoulder, and ambles over to the pirate lass she knows so well.

“Been a while, Sea Wolf.”

Aeldys laughs at the address, loud and brash as always. “You’re one to talk. Can’t even remember the last time you graced Deadlight with your presence.” She raises her own mug of rum and jauntily taps it against Makali’s in greeting. “Where the blazes have you been?”

Makali shrugs and leans against the wall next to Aeldys, smiling down at her as she knocks back her rum. “Where else? You know I can’t stay landlocked for long. Not as if you’re much different.”

“Aye,” Aeldys allows, tipping her head in acknowledgement. Her eyes- one icy blue, the other pitch black, both rich with mischief- flicker up to Makali. “But I still find time to check in at Deadlight every now and again. It’s just decent manners, lovesome.”

Makali barks a laugh and edges closer to nudge Aeldys’s shoulder with her own. “When have either of us ever been decent?”

“Ha! I did miss having you around.” Aeldys chuckles into her drink, her gaze roving over Makali in thoughtful appraisal. “You ever think of joining up with my crew again?”

“Sorry, Sea Wolf, but I’m on the Lady Luck now.”

“Any chance of jumping ship?”

“Aw, you know I can’t just up and leave a girl out in the cold like that,” Makali answers with determined casualty. Maybe she should have expected this question; she and Aeldys do make quite the team whenever their courses cross. They’re both bold, fierce, unpredictable- it’s what makes them both such damn good pirates, after all. It’s also the same thing that leads most of their affairs, fun as they are, to go up in flames. “Besides, the last time we worked together, I don’t remember it ending all that great.”

“Ah, you’re not still salty about that, are you, lovesome?” Aeldys waves a hand in the air with a shrug. “That was nothing. And besides, the things I could promise you this time around are well worth the trouble.”

“Sounds promising,” Makali admits. “Also sounds familiar. Last time, your trouble cost me half a ship and wasn’t worth a handful of gold.”

“But wasn’t it fun?” Aeldys prompts, taking a step closer. For a moment, everything else in the tavern- the shouting pirates, the bellowing music, the smell of rum- is drowned out by the look she gives Makali, a look that sends a thrilling jolt all the way down Makali's spine.

Gods help her, Makali did always love those eyes of hers.

“Yeah,” she says, brushing a hand through Aeldys’s dark hair and letting her fingers linger on the edge of her jaw. “I do remember the fun.”

“And don’t you trust me?”

Not in the slightest, Makali thinks, and she knows Aeldys knows that. But Aeldys’s smirk promises excitement, and Makali is horribly tempted by that prospect. She knows Aeldys knows that, too.

“I got plans, lovesome,” Aeldys says, her voice going low, barely audible over their surroundings. “Can’t spill ‘em all yet, but big things are coming my way. I need people on my side, capable people. I know we’ve had our ups and downs, but you’re capable. It’s a rare fleet that can boast their very own renegade watershaper.”

And there goes the mood. Makali frowns and pulls away slightly. “I’m not a watershaper. You know that.”

“Point is, I could use you. You’d get your own rewards, and it’d be a good time to boot.” Aeldys doesn’t even seem to notice she’s poked a wound; or, more likely, she just doesn’t care. It’s one of the things which makes her so hard to be around, that callousness. But it’s also one of the things that makes her easy- there’s no fussing, no overthinking, just the next thing on the horizon.

It’s the only thing that makes Makali relax just a little more and ask, “Just what would this good time involve?”

Aeldys grins wickedly. “I’m sure you could come up with some ideas, lovesome. And in addition to whatever you’re thinking of in that pretty head of yours, I’d be making some real moves in the Council. You could be my right hand, and you’d be raking in some real loot.”

Ah. The Council. Whatever Aeldys promises, there’s no smirk charming enough and no promise enticing enough for Makali to get involved in that mess. “Flattering offer, but you know I didn’t come all the way out here just to get involved in politics.”

Aeldys huffs. “You sure? If you say no, I’ll be stuck with this clown.” She nods her head towards Benweth, still showboating on his harpsichord.

Makali watches him for a short while, humming along to his tune. There’s a part of her that does want to jump in and take his place, though she can’t say whether it’s because she wants the rewards or the challenge or just Aeldys. But Makali has very, very few rules in life, and this is one of them.

“I’m here for adventure and gold,” she says, and takes another swig of rum. “Not a knife in my back in some council room.”

Makali is half-convinced Aeldys will do nothing but pester her about this for the rest of the night, but the other woman seems to accept her answer. She still pouts of course, huffing and reaching out to flick Makali’s braid in a petulant manner. “Pity. We could have really had some fun together.”

Makali raises an eyebrow, and she moves to face Aeldys fully. Aeldys grins and digs her fingers into the front of Makali's vest to tug her closer, leaning herself back against the wall as her eyes roam up Makali’s body. Makali has never regretted that fact that she easily towers over Aeldys’s elven frame, but she always feels especially grateful for her stature when under the pirate’s appreciative gaze.

“Well,” Makali says slowly, “just because I’m not sticking around for long, doesn’t mean we can’t have a bit of fun tonight.”

Aeldys’s smirk grows, and her free hand curls around the back of Makali's neck, pulling her lower until their faces are level. “And here I thought you didn’t trust me.”

Makali tilts her head, an eyebrow raised as she hovers just beyond Aeldys’s lips. “Do I need to?”

“Maybe it’s more fun if you don’t.” Aeldys leans forward and closes the distance between them. Her mouth is rough and warm, and the taste of rum lingers on Makali’s lips after she pulls away. “Gotta keep you on your toes, lovesome.”

[ladylooch]

Choose Me with Trevor Moore

A/N: TREVOR!!!!!!!!!! Love bringing these little, obscure babies to life. Originally from this request, with a separate request for some angst. Also, that GIF is stupid precious. K, sorry this took so many more weekends than I thought it would!

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: Swearing, fighting, smutty if you squint

It’s raining in California this morning while I sip my morning coffee, looking out the deck door of mine and Trevor’s house in Manhattan Beach. The gray rain clouds meet the deeper gray of the Pacific Ocean, making it difficult to know where land and sky separate. It’s all around dreadful out and the forecast calls for more rain through the weekend. I don’t care though. Because after a grind of a NHL season, littered with scary injuries for Trevor, we are heading on a two week vacation to Maui. I am so excited. I’ve never been to the Hawaiian Islands and can barely wait. Two weeks of white beaches, poke, and coconut flavored drinks. Two weeks of reconnecting with my sweet soulmate.

That sweet soulmate is currently behind me, grabbing himself a cup of coffee as well.

“This weather sucks.” He says, groggily rubbing at his tired face. I walk over to him, going on my tip toes to give him a good morning smooch. He softens into my touch, feeling content with our arms wrapped around each other.

When the machine finishes his cup, we walk to the couch to drink our coffee together. We sit close to each other, hands easily resting on one another. Spotify plays soft country music through the house speakers as we spend some quiet time together.

“Do you have any plans for your first hockey free day?” I ask him, raking my fingers through the side of his brown hair. 

“Not much. Going to lift weights at the rink in a bit, then sit here on the couch the rest of the day.” His brown eyes slide closed, relaxing into my touch. I move forward, careful of my cup to trail kisses along his strong jaw. When I get close to his chin, he turns, capturing my lips with his. “Gotta make a decision about Worlds today though. They keep blowing up my phone.” He mutters a bit annoyed. I pause a millimeter away from his face, lips still puckered. Pre-worlds activities and practice begins right when we are supposed to be leaving for Hawaii. 

“Really?” 

“Yeah, USA hockey has called and texted me every day since Saturday.” It’s now Tuesday. “Kinda sucks that I even have to be called about it… for the second year in a row.” I pull back, looking at his side profile. Did he forget?

“Babe, we are going to Hawaii.” I remind him.

“Yeah, I know that was the plan, but we could move our trip around. The tickets and hotel are refundable.” Anger shoots immediately through my whole body.

“Wow, when were you going to ask me my thoughts on this?” He senses the shift as I pull every part of my body away from his. I sit up straight, coffee mug set on the table in front of us.

“I mean… when I decided to go or not?” His tone is cautious and confused, like he isn’t understanding the sudden shift in my behavior.

“Trev, what the hell?”

“If I go, you don’t have to, babe.” He shrugs, reaching out for my thigh. He’s completely missing the point. I shove his hand off of me, standing up to pace in front of him. He’s completely alert now, sensing the fight brewing.

“What about our vacation? The one you told me to plan right after the team was eliminated. I just did all of this work and now you’re like.. well maybe I’ll go to Worlds! Without even asking me if that is okay?” Trevor is immediately put off by my raised voice and his nostrils flare.

“I don’t need to ask permission to go somewhere.” I baulk at him. 

“No, but you probably should check in with your long-term girlfriend, who you’ve been ring shopping with, to see if she’s cool with you moving your vacation.”

“Why is this such a big deal? It’s not like we can’t afford to change plans.”

“That is not the point, Trevor. Why is everything more important than me and what I want?” I wave my hands around in frustration. “I have sat here patiently next to you for three seasons now while you have lived your dream. I’ve cooked, cleaned, shopped, rubbed at your body and held you when you had insomnia because of your concussion. And this is the thanks I get? A moved vacation so you can go do more of what you love while I wait?”

His gaze drops from me. He says nothing. My chest rises and falls rapidly with my heavy breathing. I blink back tears, then look out at the different shades of California gray. I narrow my eyes. Fuck this.

“You know what, go to Worlds. I’ll go to Hawaii by myself. I could use a break from more than just this rain.” My tone is insinuating.

I reach for my coffee cup, walking it back to the kitchen sink and dumping it out. I set it aggressively in the dishwasher then slam the door shut. Trevor sighs heavily then stands, coming to block my path from leaving the room. 

“I’m sorry. You’re right. I should have asked if this was okay. I’ll tell them no if that’s what will make you happy.” I scowl. “What?” He responds.

“Why do I have to tell you to choose me? Why can’t you just do that?” He opens his mouth to respond as I step back from his grasp, holding my hands up. “I’m done with this conversation. I need space from you right now.”

“Okay.” He steps to the side, letting me pass without another touch or word.

I’m absolutely seething as I walk down to our bedroom. How does he not get it? Why do I have to lead him to the answer? How could he just assume this would be fine with me? I need to calm down and I know the answer is a long, hot shower.

I rip my clothes off when I get in the bathroom, still absolutely seething. Why does anything hockey related come before me? It’s like we have a third person in this relationship at all times. I’m asking for two fucking weeks of his time. Is that really too much to ask after sharing him with the world for the last 7 months?

“Asshole.” I mumble as I light my Sweater Weather candle. I grab a lavender shower steamer, tossing it onto the tile to give me some extra calming power. I take my time from there, trying to refocus my anxious energy into self-care. I do a hair mask. I exfoliate my skin. I stand under the scalding water hoping it will relax my neck muscles. I admittedly shed a few tears too.

After I dry off, I do my whole skin care routine with every oil, cream, and moisturizer I have in my drawers. I lather lotion on every inch of my skin and put in air drying hair cream to de-frizz my hair before it has a chance to poof with the rainy weather.

When I open the bathroom door, I see Trevor sitting on the edge of our bed. His doe eyes lifts to me in the doorway, fingers laced together in his lap.

“I asked for space.” I remind him, walking by his sluggish body to our large closet.

“I know. And I’m respecting that as much as I can. I had to physically restrain myself from getting into the shower with you.” I roll my eyes at him. He’s such people pleaser, it kills him when I’m angry with him.

“Should I get you a gold star?” I quip back. His jaw ticks as he grits his teeth together to avoid a similar retort.

I drop the towel, going to my dresser to grab a fresh set of bra and panties. They’re black and Trevor’s eyes watch longingly as they glide into place against my smooth skin. I reach for a pair of jeans folded in a different drawer. The sound of denim against my legs is the only noise in our large closet. Trevor leans against the door frame, arms crossed over his chest. 

As I get dressed, my inner thoughts begin to swirl, telling myself a twisted victim story that brings tears to my eyes. I sniff as they form, turning my back to Trevor as I reach for a t-shirt. I’m so disappointed and hurt. I feel like he would rather go halfway across the world than spend time with me. When I turn back towards the door, two tears slip down my face. Trevor can’t hold back anymore. 

“I’m not going to go. I already told them no.” He wraps his arms around me, kissing my wet hair. His hands rub along my fresh shirt, pressing me as deep as I can go into his body. “And not because you asked me not to, but because I’m choosing you. I want you to know that it really isn’t a choice though. It’s always you, babe.” I collapse further into his body. “And, I’m so sorry I made you feel like just an option.” His words soothe my inner thoughts until the truth of his intentions are clear again.

“Trev, that’s enough.” I whisper, turning my face to catch his lips. “I know you’re choosing me and that’s everything.”

“I love you so much.” He says between kisses. “I appreciate everything you do for us. And me specifically. I’m so lucky. I’d be lost without you.” I smile against his shirt. “Couldn’t even make my morning smoothie.” He jokes. Last week, he almost turned the blender on without the top on.

“It would be a really sad life for you.” I agree “I’d be fine.” I purse my lips against the laugh.

“Thanks, babe.” He chuckles against my hair. “Keeping it real as always.” 

“It’s why you keep me around.” I pat his butt before stepping away from him. He pulls me back into his embrace.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He nips at my mouth. “You put those sexy panties on and think you’re leaving me?” 

“Thought you were going to the rink.” My heart skips a beat at the molten desire in his brown eyes.

This time, his choice is easy and obvious.