#you realize these people cant talk to their friends or family at will

[gay-kurapika]

I'm irate enough to talk about shit I hated at the psych ward instead of being scared about it or nice lol. This is such a small thing, but it needs to be understood in context. As patients we have like no rights at all. Most of us are there involuntarily and can't leave even through "against medical advice" means. We have to stay. And we don't have our phones, and we can only contact people whose phone numbers are on an approved list. Even to ask for clothes, which are not provided. I wore the same pair of underwear for three days before my sister could bring me another pair. Asking for things is bad behavior. I was on my period during my stay and I was asked why I needed a tampon more than once a day. I switched to asking for pads to avoid that question, and I could still only ask for them during approved times, if I asked otherwise it was an inconvenience.

The part that bothers me the most was that we were all expected to attend 5 hours of group therapy per day. I attended all of them except during my very last day, when i was frustrated that I had been lied to about when I would get to go home. I skipped one meal and one therapy group during that time. And that was bad behavior, somehow. They overlooked it because I was being released but they had threatened other people who had done similar things literally a day before they were released with longer stays.

I also was an avid reader. They had a small collection of donated books available, and I read 5 of them before I left, including a very long Brandon Sanderson novel and The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck. I did this because reading comforts me during anxiety attacks. I heard a full conversation between two nurses where they were saying how "no one reads these anyways" and they shouldn't have books and it almost made me cry. People in mental health wards have so little, how are you resentful of one of the few things they do have? Why would you want those taken away? It genuinely hurt me. I was there as the clear example of the person who benefits from reading, please don't take that option away.

[astralmarionette]

im currently writing an atsugawa (I hate the name shin soukoku or whatever I'm sorry but I'm actually not. also I cannot pronounce soukoku {this is the real reason I don't use soukoku}) and I don't even ship it lmaoo

[rosicheeks]

🤗

[yelloworangesoda]

maxwell and sammy are all mine and i love them like my children but its pretty hard to divorce them from fnaf enough to make them straight up ocs. sammy especially bc hes technically not my oc, even if i made up every aspect about him except his name and dead twin sister

[wszczebrzyszynie]

In older artworks Ryba seems so much edgier and so angsty and now… he’s like a cute puppy. I would love to know how Ryba has changed over the years, and how he’s different or similar from his older versions. I think you mentioned a few years ago that Ryba (as he is now) was a bad boy when he was younger, and I wanna know if that’s still true. If it is, how does he think of his past self and how did he go from edgelord to ray of sunshine?

Hmmm well i wouldnt exactly call Ryba... hm. I can feel this will be a long one. Hes one of my top 3 favourites so this was fun to elaborate on

Ryba is one of my older characters (7 years old now or so) so he has changed quite significantly and in ways i cant really explain. I probably just got bored with him being the problem child and made him nicer. Well either way yes in retrospective Ryba used to be very edgy and one of my main problem causing characters. He wasnt mean exactly as much as he was just uncaring and extremely selfish. Not worlds most insufferable teenage boy but definitely someone annoying. That problem child persona is still present in current Rybas childhood, which was mostly caused by grief and loss of his family and lack of attention and care that came with it. Ryba lost his parents when he was fairly young and was living with his more estranged family before later moving in with his grandma, with whom he lives since (and who he loves very much), and that period was very hard for him and shaped him as a person going forward. He started acting out durning that time and it progressed so much it just further isolated him from others; he was always a nice child if given the chance and some positive attention, but he did do a lot of stupid things for people to just see him

Ryba now is a very kind and friendly person, but that kindness is rooted somewhat in what other people would consider selfish needs; he needs to be liked, to be a friend and be worthy of others positive attention. Its his main life fuel; Ryba doesnt like dealing with his own problems, and prefers drowning himself in love to escape from them. Hes overly dependent on that feeling of love. Doesnt mean hes less kind or that hes somehow two faced, but that kindness doesnt come from a "morally pure" need to just be kind, and thats a very important aspect of Rybas personality.

Ryba has a lot going on in his head he doesnt know how to succesfully sort out; hes not stupid (even though he does act dumber than he is to make people laugh and appear more safe, friendler), but he has significant problems with sorting out his needs (both physical and emotional) energy and emotions, not helped by his extreme unwillingness to deal with it in a normal way or even just, talk to someone about it. Ryba is both an open and a closed book. Instead his own problem solving skill boils down to occasionally throwing things at the wall to see if they stick and never letting go if they do. Which is why he tends to contradict himself a lot; his tendency to pick fights with other boys is the same outlet for his emotions as being clingy and loving is. Its relatively easy for him to replace one with the other in the short term, as long as hes in the centre of attention and is being physically close to someone, even if in the long term his tendency to fight could be considered a form of self harm; its something that makes him feel awful right after, but he keeps doing it, because it does work for something. On the other hand, clingyness and whatever form of intimacy hes offered, tends to result more in him feeling like a freak (hence the "Ryba wouldnt be able to date someone who isnt as obsessive about him as he is" from one of my recent rybaposts came from; if he knows hes needed the same way he instead leans into the codependency as much as he can, even when he realizes hes getting "addicted" to a person; Ryba is surprisingly perceptive, especially when it comes to other people, he just doesnt want to deal with the baggage). In the similar way, his need to take care of others instead of himself is his way of making himself useful and having something else to focus on that isnt himself. Ryba is a character whose sanity is being held together by wax and spit

As for what he thinks about his younger self; if he had to be honest he just wishes there was someone for him at that time and after. Main theme of DNS is loneliness and while i wouldnt say modern Ryba is lonely, nor does he consider himself so (he may not talk about his issues to his friends, but they are still his friends nonetheless and he loves them a lot), that sudden childhood separation from people he should depend on and a period of loneliness that came with it is something that definitely did shape him in a significant way; kind of like a root of the problem that kept on growing even after the disaster has stopped, becoming something a bit more complex than in its infant state

[spaloonbabooguuscooties]

You could drink your whole life away and still never get that taste out of your mouth.

half commission for @salempie half completely self indulgent dreck pieced together from our insane conversations abt franke and elka. told myself id finally write a big explanation for all of the dum shit between these two for context so Thats Under The Cut.

so I already wrote some stuff about elka and franke's relationship back in whispering rock so feel free to look at that too . it goes over elkas blindness/‘seeing’ with clairvoyance and how her and franke started talking & all that good stuff

SO FOR STARTERS. a lot of thsi wont make sense without a big breakdown of elka herself. because elkas potential as a character is like insane to me. like just the idea of her in the long run of her life reads as something so potentially tragic; a young girl whos plagued with visions of doom and destined to be an outcast even in her own home for things she cant control and clings to the One vision of her wedding that she thinks is 'happy' even despite the fact she doesnt really love the person in it. im choosing to take the li-po doc as canon here because its funny shes the only one with backstory-

but my fucking god even the smallest look into what her parents are like is soo fucked up to me. and i do think elka especially gets a lot of influence from her mother; its funny how easily you can fit mabel doom into a box just from what elka says about her. knees deep in an avon-esque pyramid scheme and leaning into her daughters depressing ass visions & taking her to therapy at age 11 (which would be good if not for the kind of person you can already assume she is & so i doubt the therapist she has really does her any good. i think they share one). she reads as a very I Am My Daughters Best Friend type of mom to me and i can see elka being a centerpiece of the conversation when she has her Amway Girls over for drinks. wine-mom that lets her kid sip from the glass so she can feel like a big girl type deal.

and you can tell that elka is trying to hard to be too mature for her age even in her campster posts. how she writes letters to nils' mom and exchanges baking recipes with her and that feels like she really only interacts with middle aged women and not really many people her own age outside of camp (like her moms friends). which makes sense shed feel the need to ‘grow up’ early when shes probably had to process so many hard things at a young age bc of her visions.

theres a lot of filling the blanks here of course.

elka obsesses over nils to an overbearing degree even despite the fact he treats her like shit ('you promised no talking' and so on) and she treats him bad right back. she leans onto stereotypical heterosexual ideals like taking care of him and overblowing how Manly and Protective JT is and she admires romance stories like pride and prejudice and it feels like she Projects Soooooooo much of what she wants onto boys she barely feels anything for without knowing what its actually supposed to feel like. and clearly she WANTS that ideal future, a happy marriage, an actual romance- but according to nils even when they were dating she ignored him most of the time, which just seems Very Telling

like shes filling a role, overcompensating for emotions and lacktherof she cant digest quite yet, and it only makes more sense when you know shes had visions of their future together. how could that be bad for her? shouldnt it be like the books and movies? but she doesnt really connect the fact that her visions are only for Doomed futures, and if she does she certainly doesnt show it. Doomed relationships. it's been a part of her family for generations and she isn't turning out much different, is she? i dont think she even realizes thats all she ever sees yet, just that its Going to happen. that it's Her future, and it always will be

and like, her only reference for a real marriage so far has been her own parents, and she already Knows they have an affair, and theyre doomed to split, (and i actually like to think they were in rough waters anyway and elka was a child meant to mend a crumbling marriage but thats a whole other thing) and so without a framework for what an actual healthy relationship is supposed to be like she cant really grasp that her relationship with nils Isnt that and isnt ever going to be. she can only cling to this one happy idea of the future, and thats why she keeps chasing him, self fulfilling the actuality of her situation and creating and fostering the unhappy life they will inevitably live together.

and that bleeds into everything else in her life, of course, because as the years go on, as the visions grow in number it just makes sense for her to fall into the predictability of her life. she always knows whats going to happen, her visions are Never wrong- so why try to change things? shes had time to process tragedies days, weeks, months, years before they happen, shes had time to settle into every crack of her life. her parents divorce, her various break ups, her future with the psychonauts.

“and she's already seen so much of a future with [nils] she feels trapped almost. Like she has to be happy in it or else it just means her life is miserable. And it's a mixture of pride and fear of the unknown that keeps her clinging to the One thing she knows. BUT LIKE!!! She knows what's gonna happen! It's easier to grieve when she's been grieving for years... She wants so badly to be happy, But to do that she has to step into the unfamiliar. And that's more terrifying than staying the same miserable person she's always been.”

and thats where franke comes in— and yeah you Do have to take a lot of liberties for frankes character since it’s basically, like, all the info for her is just that shes a Supreme Baby Dyke but thats enough for me. i think she has protective butch itch in her . on campster shes defensive over other women evidenced in the way she keeps watch over the girls cabins for lili when elton is pursuing her . but shes also eager to please and constantly trying to make kitty laugh and also Very naive. but she tries! and i think it only solidifies more as she gets Older and really gets a hold of her feelings & her powers. this is incredibly franke to me

and i think as they grow older together— because i think franke and elka Do stay friends, both because elka is just pathetic and needs that positive connection even if she doesnt realize it and because i think franke is a very Loyal person & annoyingly persistent if you let her be . and i am also a kitty/franke truther. because kittys also important in this web we weave

because i think franke and kitty stay together after camp, to a point— theres a falling out facilitated on kittys end and they break up, but reconnect, and franke kind of... saves kitty from herself a little, from her strict military father whos love only extends thru finances , from her own stifling future , she drives all the way to bakersville in her shitty van handmedowned from her dad and they move in together eventually . they get jobs at the motherlobe , because it’s a pipeline to a decent job, because it’s whats easy, because franke doesn’t really have a future, because she’s never really been good at much, because shes never had much sense, because franke doesnt really care as long as she can live and help, sometimes, if she can, and because kitty’s there, and because elka’s there, and shes so used to being elkas eyes now and shes good at it. shes good at being the muscle of the missions when her colleagues lack it, when hypnosis and predictions arent enough. she likes it that way.

and elka appreciates frankes company. she listens, shes sweet, she does little things for her that no ones ever really put the effort for before; she likes her. franke is strong and bold and makes her laugh and shes always there but god elka cant let go of that future, of that box shes put herself in, that her mothers put her in, of being a Good Wife to a Loving Husband, of getting married normally and falling into unfailing familiarity. thats all shes ever wanted and shes not going to jeopardize that . not for franke, who may not be a boy but is handsome like one, whos always held her after every break up with nils and the men that filled empty days inbetween.

and elka is too stubborn to recognize those feelings anyway. too prideful to accept a way out. too set in her cycle no matter how much she hates it, her little self fulfilling tragedy of her own making, wallowing in her own doom. she struggles for control of her own life when she feels like every choice has been made for her anyway, she puts up her walls and carefully constructs what people see. but franke was always harder to trick, because while empathy isnt a particularly useful psychic power it’s certainly an inconvenient one. all franke has to do is get too close and all those carefully crafted walls fall apart, and elkas control is gone, and thats all she really has. and she tries to distance herself, really she does, but franke is also too persistent. and elka wears gloves, keeps contact that would make her walls crumble from happening as best as she can, but she cant really keep herself from the brief moments where she feels like someone actually fucking cares about her.

and that slightest lack of control, the need to wrestle it back is why she proposes to nils the next time theres a falling out— she knows how it happens, she plans every detail. and he accepts, despite everything. gets her a cheap ring and it feels like lead on her finger and its nothing at all like how shed thought it to be when she was a kid, theres no feather light feeling in her chest, only that dreadful reality that she cant turn this back. BUT WHAT CAN U DO LMAO

elka doesnt tell franke about this engagement until later, on their way back from a mission. late at night when neither of them can sleep, and franke invites elka to smoke in her van, because its been so long since theyve been alone like that, because elkas been so strangely absent lately. and because of everything, because frankes always so damn nice, because elka hates the feel of the ring on her finger, because she let herself get high alone with franke fucking athens whos always been so good at pulling her apart— the truth of it all spills out and its messy and emotional and she hates it, she hates the life shes made for herself, but franke makes it easier to bare and now shes here and shes so close and god she wishes she could see her smile again, she wishes she could see franke, thats all she needs right now and she cant but she can touch her and she can hold her and for tonight, she can be known, she can let those walls crumble, she can be something else just for once here with franke . she can kiss her here in this van, touch that happiness for just a moment, and forget the future that waits for her outside of it. franke begs her to forget the wedding, to just let herself be happy— and god, she wants to, but it means turning her back on everything shes known and everything shes saw to be inevitable, and franke has never been in her future, so if it were supposed to work out why hadnt she seen it and she cant, she cant take that risk but she can have this, even if its temporary, she can have it.

and just as soon as she gets a taste of it, its gone. after that night, after the missions over and theyre back at the motherlobe and have to pretend like nothing happened (franke doesnt, of course she tells kitty about it, she tells kitty about everything.) but that brief moment together haunts elka every time she sees franke, sees herself through frankes eyes, sees herself in her wedding dress because god its all franke can think about! of course it is! she knows how much elkas destroying herself she knows how much misery shes wallowing in that kiss in the van felt like an emotional punch to the teeth and she hasnt ever forgotten it and all she can do is sit and watch while elka throws herself into a loveless marriage. she can come to her wedding and see the way the bride and groom kiss with the emotional weight of a wet towel no matter how hard elka tries to hide it under a pretty dress and bouquets of flowers and meticulous planning.

and elka resents nils but she cant really hate him, its not his fault, not really. he feels trapped just like she does and his feelings of misery only cycle back into hers . they fight and gnash and wear away at each other and its a relationship thats crashed and burned a million times before elka even said i do. and its inevitable that she falls into her mothers habits, a sip of wine here and there to loosen up, until it turns to a glass, until it falls into a bottle on nights when whatever work nils does runs late.

but franke’s still there. shes always been there, hasn’t she? always trying to play knight, always trying to save her, dragging her home when shes stumbling over herself because god who else is going to do it but her? who else is left to care? certainly not nils. never nils. because franke knows her. because franke pities her. shes always pitied her. shes always known. and elka hates it, she resents it, but god in the same breath she’s desperate for it, she envies it to her very bones. elka is a mess but after frankes done with her she has someone to go back to that loves her. and god what elka wouldnt do to have that. to take it and keep it for herself because shes never ever got to have that movie romance shes always wanted.

so now comes this.

because elkas particularly miserable and particularly spiteful and she needs to get franke to understand, just for a moment, drink with her and get on her level and she needs her there with her no matter how her pity makes her feel. no matter how much it makes her shake with anger and envy and desperation, but god the way franke looks at her, the way she still tries to salvage what they have, the soft, slurred way she tells her that it’s okay but its not okay, none of this is okay, it never has been and she just wants franke to shut up and see that, and if she cant then she’ll show her, she’ll show her all the raw angry desperation, with too much teeth and hands that claw and grab and she’ll know why everyones always said she’s too much.

and she knows this puts her on nils’ level too. that this makes her a cheater, that shes no better than he is now. no better than her father and his affair. but god, she wants to be selfish. she wants to be in control. just for once. she wants to feel right and she wants to feel happy and she wants to feel loved. thats all shes ever wanted. and franke will let her have that, just for a little while, at the very least.

anyway. sorry. sorry for being crazy . this isnt even getting into the shit after the comic takes place . elkas stupid brainworld thag she has to overcome in order to finally be allowed in the polycule and live happily ever as worlds first lesbian divorceman

sorry for all the shit i make up instead of caring about actual characters with screentime . bye !

[bearshideout]

Ahh hi I saw you are wanting request I just gave a question if you would write a Rhea Ripley x reader [Platonic] Or maybe a judgement Day x reader [Platonic]

(Only asking BCS ik some people only like to write romantic relationships)

(First Request! Thank you <3)

Judgment Day x GN Reader (Platonic)

"Family"

You are a new wrestler who has recently joined the main roster but is struggling to find your own group luckily for you a certain group wants you as a new addition and they cant wait to welcome you in.

Y/n sighed as they packed all their stuff away in the locker room, the sounds off chatter filled their ears. It seemed ever since joining a few weeks back they couldn't find their place, everyone had already made there friends and even though they were all nice they weren't accepting new people into there groups. Y/n had never felt lonelier hearing everyone making plans after the match, they had given up on asking anymore groups if they could join the rejection hurt every time.

As they were leaving the locker room they suddenly bumped into Rhea. "I'm so sorry Rhea I didn't see you there" y/n said panicked the last thing they wanted was to start making enemies especially not with the judgment day. All they got back in return was a laugh "Don't worry about it, actually I was just looking for you" As y/n went through all the possible things she could have done to make this conversation go bad they were interrupted but this time by a male arm being wrapped around their shoulder. They looked up to see Damian who was smiling down at them "Yeah we all wanted to talk to you if you don't mind" Y/n looked at them now realizing Dom and Finn had also stood with Rhea. Dom started walking to the Judgment day's room "Lets talk in there don't want anyone listening in" Finn followed behind him nodding, Rhea grabs Y/n's hand and leads her along with a cheeky grin "your not in trouble" she jokes.

Finn opens the door for them all to go inside "We don't bite... well I don't cant say same bout this lot" he jokes getting a laugh out of y/n. While walking in she can see Dom already sprawled across one of the sofas. "so what did you want to talk about" y/n asked looking at them all, Damian's arm still around their shoulder. "Well we've been talking and we think you'd make a perfect addition to the Judgment Day, we have already talked to Triple H and he thinks its just what we need as long as you agree to it" Damian says giving your shoulder a slight squeeze. Before y/n can even gather their thoughts Rhea grabs y/n's arms desperately "Please say yes I'm begging you I need to talk to someone about [same interest] with" she begs over dramatically to sell her point making Dom shake his head and laugh. "So what do you say y/n are you in" Finn asks with a slight hint of fear.

They all wait with anticipation until finally "Yes!" y/n smiles enthusiastically they had been waiting for this moment since they joined WWE they finally had a group. "Welcome to the family" says Finn giving y/n a hug which they happily gave back. "Not fair y/n is now my new best friend I should be hugging them" said Rhea joining in the hug. "Now I feel left out" Dom piped up jumping into the hug which gained a eye roll from Damian who wrapped his arms lazily around the group hug.

"Now the family is complete" Whispers Rhea with a huge smile.

(First request done I hope this was okay! I had so much fun writing it and hopefully overtime get to do more scenarios with the judgment day)

[linos-luna]

yandere!hyunjin x reader, i seen you did something like this for han and felix where you just described their behavior before and after the reader triggered them/pissed them off to the point they no longer hid their obsessive and aggressive behavior🦅

Yandere!Hyunjin 🔪

♡ ————————————————————— ♡

As a Pisces, Hyunjin takes romance very serious… perhaps too serious. He needs to be the perfect boyfriend and you must be the perfect girlfriend. Simple right? He just needs to steer you in the right direction.

Secretly Obsessive. He doesn’t want to show it too much but he is. He’s desperate for your love and doesn’t understand why you don’t just listen to him.

Possessive. He hates when other people look at you. You may not notice but he constantly gives people the side eye.

- no one can look at his darling

- he must know where you are at all times

- You may not realize that he’s controlling everything around you

- most of your friends don’t talk to you because he got rid of them

- he chased away your family

- he picks what you wear and what you eat

- he wants you to listen to him.

- that’s what a good girlfriend does right?

- but sometimes you resist and he hates that. Why cant you just listen?

- he’ll get angry and leave before doing anything he’ll regret.

- but don’t push him

- or else you will regret it

~~~~~~~~ ♡

Hyunjin doesn’t like you on the phone. And if you are on the phone, you shouldn’t talk to anyone he doesn’t like.

He doesn’t like you talking to certain friends of yours because he knows they can see through his façade.

So his anger wasn’t a surprise when he found you in the bedroom on the phone with a friend.

“Y/n!”

You looked at him for a moment then turned around, going back to your conversation.

“Y/n!” He yelled again before snatching your phone away.

“Hey!”

“What did I tell you about being on the phone without permission?!” He yelled.

“You’re not the boss of me!”

“Excuse me?!” He was surprised at your boldness.

“You always think you can tell me what to do!” You yelled with a frown. “That’s not how relationships work.”

Hyunjin wasn’t sure what to say and threw your phone to the floor. It may not be completely broken but definitely damaged.

“What’s wrong with you?!” You say while getting up only for Hyunjin to leave the room.

You followed after him, tears rolling down your cheeks.

“Why did you do that?!” You said while following him to the kitchen.

“Do what?”

“Break my phone!”

“I didn’t break your phone.” He replied with a smile.

“Hyunjin!”

“Go sit down, sweetheart. It’s time for dinner.” He said this so calm and causally, it was weird.

“Hyunj—!”

“And why don’t you call me something else? Something more loving.” He interrupted, looking around as if he’s thinking about it. “Hm. Maybe jinnie? Honey? Baby? It only fair. You are my darling.”

You were unsettled by his tone shift and left to go sit down.

Your boyfriend came back with soup, setting the bowl in front of you along with a spoon.

“I love you so much, that I cook for you baby.” He said while sitting down, taking a spoonful of soup and holding it up.

“Jinnie, what are you doing?”

“Well I’m feeding you, silly.” He said with a condescending smile. “You’re hungry right?”

“Not really—”

You screamed in pain as poured the hot soup from the spoon to your bare lap.

“Why would you—!”

Hyunjin did it again without saying another word.

“Stop! That hurts!”

“Hm. Are you going to eat it now?” He asked while tilting his head.

“Why are you doing this?!” You cried.

“Why?!” He suddenly stood up, looking over you. “You don’t seem to appreciate all I do for you, baby.”

“Because you’re too controlling!” You yelled back, gaining some confidence as you stood up. “This isn’t how relationships are supposed to—!”

Before you could finish your statement, Hyunjin grabbed you by the hair and pulled you to the bedroom.

“Ow! Stop!” You cried while trying to resist him, but he was too strong.

He threw you to the floor and stood over you with his arms crossed.

“I’m sick of you not listening to me! I love you! Why don’t you love me?!” He said the last sentence as if he was on the brink of crying. “I do it all because I love you, baby!”

“Jinnie, this is a sick form of—”

“Of course you don’t understand!” He interrupted, obviously frustrated. “It’s all those outside influences! But I know you’re a good girl. Your the sweetest girl ever!”

You were both scared and confused. Yeah he’s always been a bit controlling but now it sounded more like an obsession with you… a weird one in an unrealistic fantasy.

“So… my sweet girl. You’re going to stay here:” he said while trying to calm himself.

“Excuse me?”

“You’re not leaving this house— no actually, you can’t even leave this room unless I let you out,” he said with a snarky smile. “Not until you learn to be a good girlfriend.”

“Jinnie, you can’t do this!” You cried with tears rolling down your cheeks.

“Don’t worry baby.” He kneeled down and rubbed your cheek. “I know you love me and will be a better girlfriend soon.”

He helped you up and gave you a kiss on the cheek. “Like right now. We’re going to watch a movie and cuddle. Right baby?”

You only looked at him and nodded, not wanting to make him angry.

“See. It’s easy.” He smiled while getting the remote and turning the tv on that was in the room. He motioned for you to sit next to him and you did.

You quietly did so and he cuddled up against you.

“What should we watch, sweetheart?”

“Anything… a-anything you want, jinnie…” you replied shakily.

“Aw baby. How sweet of you.” He said before kissing your head and looking for some kind of romance movie.

“I love you, y/n… I hope you know that.” Hyunjin said while hugging you a little. “No one will ever tear us apart.”

“… I… I love you too, Jinnie…”

[astropookie]

astro thoughts 🏇🌈✨💫🍳

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH ❤️ even though it’s almost July

disclaimer: I didn’t check my orthography

i hate it but what’s trying to tell me the universe. my friend reminds me of my mom 😭 kill me pls. she have sun 11H, she worries a lot about how others understand what she saids, what others may think of her. she wants to be peaceful but at the same time she have moon in scorpio so she’s struggling and she have a certain opinion about others based on the first impression or what made more impact -negative? idk. now I feel judge -I think it’s my anxiety-. Update: i said what was bothering me to her and everything is said, I’m proud of me, I’m in peace, she responded in a understanding manner. I can breath.

the degree of your ascendant says ALOT, not only about the physical appearance. it could point out even your career, how’s focused your life, how you react…now that I think about it, it’s like an ascendant in your ascendant pc (but if it confused you ignore it).

for example, my friend have gemini degree in his ascendant, he’s doing his major in communication, his family is full of artists and specially musicians, so he grew up knowing how to play every music instrument, it’s like breathing to him, music. he’s used to it and he express himself by composing and being curious, wanting to know about this and that. other example: my other friend has a gemini rising but I was thinking “there’s something that’s missing” 👀 the leo degree of course. he be slayyiing💅 he’s sassy. he knows what he wants and people always be wanting him not the other way around 🙄 he’s like purr stunning gurl 💋

the same friend told me the other day that his first impression of me was or exactly what he thought: “you don’t want to mess with her” “I wouldn’t mess with her ever”. he told me I remembered him of maddy of euphoria -I gave him the idea bc I didn’t understand and he agreed-. Ascendant - Saturn aspects make you look like a bad bitch, like they’ll kick your ass if you don’t do what they tell you, THEY ARE. The structure of their face is also bony. They look like they’re mad, like they’re on their way and if you step there you’re dead: karmic. The jawline, omg, is sharp, it could cut you.

Picture 1 Picture 2 Picture3

Also, bc Capricorn is ruled by Saturn, Capricorn ascendants and saturn-ascendant aspects share characteristics but are not the same? Capricorn risings have this cheekbones that are so sensual and even if they age, the cheekbones are still there, what you notice first is that. What they share is the intimidating aura strangers perceive. In different levels or forms I believe.

Dakota Johnson Gisele Bündchen

TWO QUEENS THAT I CANT FINISH TO DESCRIBE HOW THEIRE SO ETHEREAL BEAUTIFUL STUNNING ICONIC AND INFINITE THINGS MORE

I have Mars in Retrograde. I don’t know what bothers me until I explode or until I go to my psychologist. I minimize what bothers me and save it all in the back, so then my brain will hurt. I don’t figure out or notice when something bothers me bc I don’t think is a big deal or that’s a joke, but even if it’s a joke I can still not like it -a side note-. You’ll find me realizing later what was bothering me and then struggling to tell people how I really felt when they did THAT something.

Picture from Pinterest

when the kid’s mercury is sextile Saturn’s dad (synastry: mercury sextile saturn), it means the dad communicates with their child as a way of teaching, caring about them. through their communication, they share childhood stories, experiences of any type and what they have learned about them, what they have observed. trough their talking they share their wisdom. the father have all the attention of their kid when he opens his mouth. the kid somehow knows something important is about to be said or they admires their dad that much.

Picture from Pinterest

Leo moons 5H + aries degree can be pretty egoist, they could lost themselves in the idea of something, of having it. Also they don’t think, twice letting themselves be carried by the emotion that idea gives them. They’re in their pretty little world of fun but they are not looking what’s happening to others, they’re hungry for their passion. I HAVE TO TELL: not everyone with these placements are like this and blablabla -the same thing I say for precaution- AND I had something, it’s not even something 🙄 I had nothing with these placement k? but it gives you an explanation for my attitude. STILL, I think I gotta mention some of the synastry so it’ll make sense. In another time bc I don’t want to waste my energy in that -and don’t want to-.

Saturn in opposition with Uranus aspect makes the individual stay in the doubt. They’re stanched while they keep analyzing the pro and cons of the situation they want to start/be part. Even if someone extern try to help, they’ll be doubting more.

Virgo moons are just so wholesome ☹️❤️ They want to help. they’re always doing something. they want the best for you. they care of others as if they take care of themselves but better, sadly. they work too much they need a rest but they know they’ll be anxious of doing nothing. they’re just pure souls. they’re so kind. always helping in a ONG/organization that helps needed ones.

Aquarius mercury always have something to say, they’re always right 🙄 even though they say it’s comprensible and natural that everyone have their own beliefs I don’t believe them. I think they think their mindset is better and everyone should follow it. LIKE GURL WTF I know you think you are wise and shit and you’ve passed through experiences that made you learned and that inspired you to tell them to others BUT let others make mistakes and be wrong, let others don’t be like you, there’s the beauty. I always find them criticizing others for their manners, as if they have lived the same way you did.

I don’t believe/trust? in libras, yeah ok may be that my sun is in libra but not my whole chart. That’s what I’m talking about, with that last sentence I’m gaslighting you 💌 how tf you believe in libras when they don’t tell the truth directly I CANT. With my honesty I gotta mention that my libra sun appear when I don’t want to ruin something that benefits me, when I don’t know the person and I try my best, to my sag/scorpio/aquarius placements to not appear. They always keep something in their minds, they don’t tell you all, they keep to themselves some part, could be to not hurt you, doesn’t benefits them or whatever. a friend with moon in libra degree and another with libra moon: I always want them to say what they want, they can’t. I want to squish the hell out of them bc I can’t too😭🔪

Ceres 3H is a good placement for a psychologist. How they motivate others using their minds, that easily absorbs and process/analyses experiences and knowledge, to finally find a solution depending on the case -of the patient-, so it’ll be suitable. When they help others, their communication keeps improving with time. More experience = better. Still, it’s natural.

—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•

❀ Based on my personal experience.

❀ English is not my first language.

❀ I’m not a profesional astrologer.

Thank youu. baibaiii🫣🫶🏼💋

Do not copy. Please give me credits.

[bloodywickedlips]

Gift or a curse

Summary: Y/N was born with a gift, a gift to see the dead and when one ghost doesn't want to leave her alone she approaches the team with a message but it doesn't go as planned.

Now when you ask me sometimes and by sometimes I actually mean 99% of the time you keep to yourself and don’t speak up if you have the gift that I have.

But let me start from the beginning.

My name is y/n and we have a gift running in our family, neither my mom or my gran got the gift but my great grandmother had it, you see we can see and speak to the dead.

Its misunderstood in the world we live in, so we keep to ourselves and don’t talk about it, I learned my lesson with that one when I opened up to a then boyfriend and he freaked out on me calling me a freak and a lunatic. So after that I kept it to myself and never looked for a boyfriend again, he showed me not to trust any man with my heart.

But everywhere I walked they were there, trying to get a message to a loved on. At age 28 I had mastered the ability to shut them out when I needed to.

And on this morning as I was waiting to get a coffee I saw one of them, I made the mistake to look at her and she noticed. Since then she followed me around, constantly talking to me and trying to get me to respond. I shut my eyes and breathed out slowly as I shut her out. Breathing a sigh of relief I rolled my shoulders and continued with my day.

By the end of my work shift I was ready to let off some steam, and I knew the perfect bar to go to. My job didn’t make it easier as I was a nurse and there tend to be a lot of ghosts roaming around.

I stepped into the bar freshly showered and ready to have some fun but I would soon realize it would come to an end.

On drink number five I heard her voice again as I was dancing. “Please I know you can hear me, I need your help” she said and I rolled my eyes trying to just relax.

“Please help me” she said again and I huffed as I turned to look at her, she was pretty, and young.

“leave me alone, I can’t” I said to her and walked to the bar to order another drink. “You don’t understand, I need to get a message to someone. Please…” she desperately asked me and I stared at her.

“I’m just trying to have fun, and you ruining it” I said and then realized there was a tall black man staring at me strangely. I pointed to my ear which happed to have a earphone in, for cases like this.

“Friend is annoying me when I'm trying to have fun” I explained and saw him nod, not sure if he was buying it.

“You see I cant here” I said as the man walked away. “No please, I just need you to talk to him then I will leave you alone” she explained and I shook my head. “Sometimes its better not talking to them, it makes the grieving worse” I explained to her but she gave me a pointed look and I knew she was not going to leave me alone.

“Fine, who is it?” I asked and she gave me a small smile, turning she pointed to a group of people. And here I was hoping it was someone sitting alone drowning in their sorrows.

I drank my drink quickly and walked over to the table with her right next to me.

“Excuse me? Can I talk to you for a second?” I asked the guy and watched as he turned to face me.

Tall, beautiful brown eyes…no golden eyes with dark circles around them. Brownish hair that looked soft to the touch and a calculating expression on his face.

“Is something wrong?” he asked me and it took me a few seconds to get my head on straight.

“Yes, no I mean no. nothing is wrong, I would just like to speak to you privately” I said and looked around the table to see all of the group was staring at me, including the black guy from the bar.

“No sweetheart that’s not a good idea” the black man said and I arched my eyebrow at him.

“No problem” I said and turned to go back to having fun but the girl was standing in front of me.

“You didn’t even try…please” she said and I hung my head in annoyance. “For fuck sakes” I said to myself and turned back to the group.

“I have a message for you, so please if we could talk alone” I said to the man again and that’s when everyone went stiff and looked at each other.

“Who are you?” the blonde lady asked and I rolled my eyes. “Please I am just trying to enjoy my night, I have a message for him and the quicker he hears it the quicker I can be left alone” I said and gasped as suddenly I was pulled backwards, my hands behind my back.

I was being handcuffed and led out of the bar. “What the fuck, get off of me!” I shouted not understanding. Everyone was silent as I kept screaming and trying to get loose but nothing helped and twenty minutes later I found myself in a private room, handcuffed to the table.

I looked around and saw the girl standing there and glared at her. “You could have told me they are FBI then I would have approached them differently” I hissed at her and saw her look down feeling bad.

“Who are you talking to?” a voice said and I looked up to see an older gentleman walk in with a case file, mine probably.

“Someone who needs to give more information” I replied and watched as he sat down.

“You are something very different, you have a record. You told the police three times where bodies were, without an explanation and each time you were let go cause they couldn’t pin you to any of the murders, so tell me how is that possible?” he asked me with a hard stare and I shook my head.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you” I said and he sat back while crossing his arms. “Try me” he countered and I banged my head on the table not believing this was how I was going to spend my night.

“Just let me talk to the tall one, then you will understand and let me go” I pleaded but he wasn’t giving in.

“I have a message for him and only him, send him in or let me go home” I said to him but he wasn’t doing anything. I got angry and swiped my case file off of the table and gasped as he took hold of my wrists, it sent a shock through me and I groaned in pain. “Stop…stop please” I cried out as I saw the flashes behind my own eyes. He let go and I tried to slow my breathing.

“I just want a peaceful life” I whispered out and felt a tear run down my cheek from the pain I experienced. “Then tell me the message” he said and I looked over to the corner to the girl.

“Thomas merton” I replied what she said and watch hotch frown and a few seconds later the door opened. “What did you say?” he asked and my eyes met the brown ones. “Thomas merton” I said again and saw him go still.

“How, how do you” he trailed off and I closed my eyes for a second and looked at him again. “Because I have a message for you” I said and followed his every move as he walked over and sat down.

“Reid you can’t…” the older man said but he shook his head. “Please I need to hear this” he said and the older man nodded and left the room.

“How do I know this is the truth?” he asked me and I looked to the girl again. “Spencer, you are spencer Reid” I said and he shook his head looking desperate. “That’s easy, google” he replied coldly back to me.

“Thomas…” “I KNOW THAT!” he shouted at me and it made me jump. “Let me finish” I said and started again. “Thomas, she can never take him from the two of you, Diane I mean. Not your mother Diana, you read a lot and your IQ is very high.” I said and he looked bewildered. “What did I never say back over the phone?” he asked and I waited and sighed as I replied. “I love you” I said and saw tears well up in his eyes.

“It’s her…” he said and I nodded softly “Maeve yes, she is here” I said and watched as the tears fell down his cheeks.

“She wants me to tell you she is okay, there is no pain and she is worried about you. You bought something recently and she doesn’t want you to relapse. Things didn’t work out but she is always there, watching” I said and sat and watched as spencer broke down into sobs.

“I’m sorry Maeve, I didn’t save you” he said and I shook my head.

“No, you did everything you could. She is proud of you after everything but she doesn’t want you to harm yourself, she wants you to be happy, find your happiness again” I said and looked at Maeve to see her smiling with own tears running down her cheeks. “Tell him I will always watch but I need to go now, if he feels down he should read our book” she said and I took spencer’s hand in my own.

“she is ready to go into the light but she will always watch over you, and if you are sad read your book, the special book” I said and watched as his eyes widened. “No she cant go yet…” he said and I smiled sadly. “It’s time spencer” I said and he nodded sadly. “Tell her that I love her” he said and I smiled. “She can hear you, and she loves you too” I said and shuddered as I felt her cross over into the light. “Is she?” he asked and I nodded softly and watched as more tears run down his cheeks.

“Spencer she had the message for a reason, and she wouldn’t stop until I gave it to you” I said and he wiped his tears knowing I was right. He stood up and unlocked my cuffs. “You can go” he said and I laughed lightly. “I wish I could but I have one more message” I said and he looked over to me curiously. “From Haley, she’s here for Aaron” I said and knew I was in for a long night as I experienced her pain for myself when Aaron touched me.

[musicfranchisetournament]

propaganda under the cut !!

paradox live :

ive seen my friends talk about it and also theres this really pretty girl i thibk her name is anne? i wanna kiss her mwah

The world is set in the future where the hip hop artists have these cool Phantom Metals that produce cool illusions as they perform with the downside of the performers reliving their worst trauma after using it. Every group has their own theme, aesthetic, and music style Every character has canon trauma which perfect for angst Found family It's still going on They do April Fools on the fandom every year (2024 being an ad for a cat game)

charisma house :

genuinely what the fuck. i don't think i've seen a song franchise as bonkers as charisma house and i doubt i ever will. it's so entertaining and the characters are all unhinged in the best way possible. none of them are 100% good people at the end of the day and i think this just makes the whole ordeal even funnier. are you kidding me you have some random 19 yo who invites people to go live in a random house one day and they just go. the songs are so so good (most of the time. stares at my two exceptions) and whenever it's a full group song? they're always parodies of another common popular song which is so funny to me every time i hear them. i love charisma house and will defend it to the days end

It's so silly and entertaining:) the songs are sick and super catchy . The visuals are super unique .. and the concept of these eccentric crazy guys all living in a house together with the power of charisma has some super hilarious interactions.  Also charisma is the power that can save the world.. and if these guys get too overpowered with their charisma they go through yugioh style transformations and break out into song... so there is that little detail<3

they're just ordinary guys. music part aside the story is funny until it gets serious and then it's funny AND heartwrenching. music part?? group songs are based on nursery rhymes and they fucking suck but also go so hard. their solo songs all have their own genres and they're so. Aodhajhfhdhfbd Stream viva la liberation. 

Funny gay people living in a house together and all their songs parody children's songs, and all their music videos are like Cocomelon on crack. They're funny and they have a lovely found family dynamic. Very silly guys, I'm so normal about them.

Never in my life have i seen a piece of media change me this much as a person while doing the bare minimum. Perhaps the fact that it is the bare minimum and i still fell for it regardless says more about its power than any words could ever begin to describe. So utterly ridiculous in the most perfect way possible and so weirdly deep in also the best way possible but without forgetting its still fucking ridiculous. The appeal of Charisma House is that its Charisma House, and that same thing manages to be both its strength and its weakness, but its weakness is so grand it ends up becoming a strength, and perhaps its biggest strength by far. Talking about Charisma House makes me feel insane emotions because you cant describe it as good but you still know fully well its not bad either despite that being the easiest way to describe it. Sooner than later after so many episodes you'll end up realizing you have fell in its trap. Once you start caring. Once you start analyzing the miniscule tid bits of plot. Once all of that starts occurring you will soon come to realize you have been another victim of the mystical power Charisma House has on every single person that watches it. Or perhaps you just dont fucking care after 5 episodes and you leave it at that. This is perhaps the best option for everyone in the world. I wouldn't recommend this to anyone but the fact that i still do from time to time is because i want everyone else in the world to experience the unknown horrors of this media project until each and every one of them realize they have fallen down a hole they will never be able to escape. also Awwwww ohsebso cute i like ohse aaawwwww so cute 😍

[serejae]

I DONT FEEL LONELY WHEN I SEE HER | SEOK.MATTHEW

WHAT ! - matthew bf thoughts for my menda😇

WHEN ! - (warnings) fluff, kissing, petnames

WHO ! - i get you. ill be completely new to a group but THATTTTT one is my man. ANYWAYS I HOPE YOU ENJOY MENDA BOOKIE SNOOKS😇

! - dating matthew is like a breath of fresh air, he isnt too distanct nor suffocating

! - i think thats mainly based on the fact that he took time to study and know you before he asked you out. by the time it was your 1 month he already (been) knew the temperature you like certain drinks, how much milk is too much in your cereal, and if we wanna be normal, when you need space

! - i feel like the trope that most resonates with matthew to me, is bestfriends brother. him and his sister have such a cute bond that i feel like he’ll recognize some of his sisters friend, but when it was you it was different. he couldnt pull himself away, his sister quickly caught on and realized what he was up to (before helping you both out)

! - matthews favorite parts of his day is definitely the morning and nights time. how he’ll wake up with you in his arms taking some time to admire you before carefully sneaking off and getting ready for the gym. he’ll wait for the clock to go off at a certain time that he memorized to start making your breakfast and drink, cause by the time you get ready and freshen up it’ll be the perfect temperature

! - speaking of gym, i see some people describe matthew as friendly, in which yes he is BUT HE DOESNT HAVE EYES ON ANYOJE BUT YOU. in his mind you guys already have a white fenced house with a dog and 3 kids running around. but i digress, he’ll call you and work out while talking to you because there’s nothing that gets him more pumped than you. if any other person tries to talk or hit on him he’ll act like he cant hear them through his headphones as he speaks to you

! - he loves the night time, because after a long day or you both being tired and stressed at least he knows he can come home to you and relax with you in his arms again. he loves how his day begins with you and ends with you

! - if hes away he’ll definitely buy a stuff animal that reminds him of you before the trip and take photos of it doing the most basic things “look were on a breakfast date:)” captioned to a photo of a breakfast platter with the stuff animal sitting infront of it sitting straight up (he adjusted it making sure ur postures always right)

! - his family loves you, they hear all abour you 24/7. his family knows that when matthew cherishes something he means it. mattthew has a big heart that he doesnt take for granted , he’ll try to bring you over to canada as much as he can to bring you to his family, talk about his childhood town, as well as trying his favorite childhood snacks

! - you dont have many arguments with matthew but when you do, he does get rather defensive wanting to defend himself but after a couple arguments with you he learned that being defensive wouldnt get him anywhere, so he tries to keep his composure. on those days he does slip up, he reflects why and what made you two get here. afterwards he’ll try to start a convo so you both can go back to normal and the way he missed

! - sometimes to matthew he gets tired of the basic ways of showing affection. he loves physical touch yes, but he knows you know he basically latches onto anyone he loves. so he decided to make a new system for you, and just for you. he loves you more than the words i love you, i love you isnt enough to describe his love for you so he tweaks it a little. he’ll say phrases that make your heart flutter

“i wanna be with you in every life time”

“you make me believe in love”

“you make me feel safe”

“you look like the in bloom instrumental”

! - matthew would love to indulge in your interest, could be as adventurous as rock climbing to as calming as bird watching. he never complains. if you like it , he does too

! - he loves to try new things with you. he wants his first to always be with you, if the members invite him to go to a new amusement park he’ll drag you along or go later with you because he knows he’ll constantly be in a state of mind of “yn wouldve liked that”, “i wish yn couldve seen that”

! - please. before there was rizz king matthew, the amount of tries he took on you. you were his first victim at all his flirting attempts. more of them making him look silly than 🫦🫦 but youd never tell him that. for all he knows he is your rizz king❤️

! - everything always relates back to you somehow. if someone asked him what happiness meant to him the conversation will lead back to you. if someone asked him if he knew the technique of how to make the best slime, its still gonna lead back to you

! - yeah sure you’ll have to fight jiwoong and gunwook every so often for your own boyfriend but hes worth the fight right? or at least thats what he constantly tells you 🤨

! - when matthew loves you you know he does, not because he tells you all the time but its the little things he does that remind you “im right here if you need anything”

[ilyhaitanii]

masked fool ft. marius von hagen

sfw. while out on an nxx mission, marius finds himself reminecsing about the childhood you two spent together. jealousy bubbles in his stomach. as annoying as it sounds, he can be quite cute like this

a/n: im v much a vyn girl, but marius brainrot is so real right now. he's all i can think about these past few days

there’s something so beautiful about how imperfect marius is. a young man born into the spotlight, forced to fit the mold of his older brother when it was far too big for him. a young man of many talents and extraordinary beauty. he has it all: talent, money, fame. what more could he ask for?

to an outsider, marius von hagen has his entire life laid out for him. he has his father’s money to fall back on, he has his good looks and charm to help him out of tricky situations. he quite literally has it all. however, growing up the way marius did, you tend to be very lonely.

he seeks out any sort of relationship, good or bad. whether it was the kids in primary school who used to push him around for pocket money, or now the executives who prod and pick at him for every little mishap. he still cherishes any and all connections he makes.

the one he cherishes the most is your bond. childhood friends— marius’ only friend. sure, he was popular. he was giann’s younger brother, everybody knew his family name. but he was never truly friends with anyone.

he felt like an outsider no matter where he went because he knew people only wanted him for one thing: his family’s influence. but you? you didn’t care about any of that. you always sought him out during lunch when he’d sit up on that oak tree by the west-end of the school courtyard during lunch, you always made sure to actually listen to him. you were always the one person he knew he could rely on.

marius gazes at you from across the hall, swirling the sparkly champagne in his glass. he’s staring at your exposed back, but he’s also silently glaring at the man you’re talking to him. the rosy color on your cheeks makes his blood boil. the way you’re laughing (who is he kidding you’re fucking giggling) and blushing. there’s this indescribable feeling of annoyance, yet so much anxiety is bubbling in his stomach all at once. it makes marius feel ill.

the sound of his code name buzzing in his ear brings him back down to earth. however, he can’t help but take another look at you. he knows this is all for the mission— you have to flirt with this guy for information, but he can’t help but want to wrap his arms around you and tell the guy to fuck off.

marius knows he cant, he would mess everything up. he tries to distract himself with conversations and champaign. it works to some extent, but at some point he can’t take it. he steps outside for some fresh air. as he makes his way out to the garden, he lets out a heavy sigh.

what is wrong with him? marius knows, he’s certian you love him. hell, you’re the girl of his dreams— the love of his life. he knows there’s no one else for him but you. his hand slips into his suit’s inside pocket. he pulls out a pack of cigarettes (a pack he definitely stole from vyn’s estate but he would never admit that.)

as he lights the stick, a puff of smoke leaves the corners of his lips. the smoke suffocates his lungs, making him feel light headed. it makes him feel somewhat better. the inability to think means he doesn’t have to think about you all over some other guy. he doesn’t have to think about how you weren’t allowed to wear your promise ring so nobody knows you’re taken. marius doesn’t even want to think about that guy’s hand touching your bare back.

however, before his irritation can grow into something more intense, a pair of arms circle his waist. he’s taken aback before he looks over his shoulder. he doesn’t fully turn all the way before realizing it’s you. your cheeks pressed against his shoulder blades, fingertips toying with the button’s of his dress shirt.

“since when do you smoke?” you ask marius in a tired tone, eyes fluttering shut. he manages to turn around without your arms letting go of him. he quickly drapes his jacket over your shoulders, shielding you body from the cold. marius stomps on the cigarette, before placing it back into the pack.

“what are you doing here, missy? shouldn’t you be inside, hm?” his lips curl into that signature smirk of his. his hands make their way to your hips— cheeky bastard. “couldn’t leave me alone for one night, huh?” his tall stature allows him to hover over you. he leans down, whispering sweet words into your ears.

you chuckle in that sweet, sugary tone of yours. the bubbles in marius’s stomach dissolves. that’s sweet laughter is reserved for his ears. this side of you was reserved for him as well. he’s an idiot. your hand manages to cup his jaw, thumb rubbing circles into his cheeks (he still has a bit of a babyface.)

“answering a question with a question. you really aren’t doing well,” you frown slightly before marius’ brows fall. he shakes his head, hiding his face into the crook of your neck. he hums, inhaling the sweet vanilla scent of your perfume accompanied by the coconut shampoo you use.

“i missed you,” he says, hugging you even tighter. chest to chest, marius tries to bury himself into you, but that's physically impossible. he whines like a child, trying to curl into you. your arms are around him, your palm patting his head.

"missed you too. we can go now, luke will take over from here. just had to lure him away," you don't move your boday away from him though even has the night air has you breaking out into goosebumps. your hands slide around his waist, cheek presses against his shoulders.

there's a beauty in marius's flaws, his immaturity. a boy forced to grow up so fast, forced to carry the burden of pax's ceo-- a task he was not shaped for. though at times his immaturity and teasing manners can tick you off, you tend to encourage it. it allows marius to truly be the young man he is, rather than the serious ceo mask he wears through out the day.

so for now, you'll kiss his face, cup his cheeks in your hands, and allow him to lay between your legs with his head on your stomach, while you toy with his hair. there's no universe in which would you ever want marius to have to keep that mask on forever. even if his jealousy is stemming from a place of childishness and immaturity, you'll allow it to continue for the sole sake of wanting to see the true marius von hagen. he's much easier to talk to like this anyway.

© ilyhaitanii - do not repost, translate, plagarize or repost it to any other sites

[amalthearespawned]

tbh shifting/respawning kinda saved me.

before i got really into shifting (pre-2023), i believed that everything had a reason, that our lives are predetermined and linear. i believed everything- my health issues and disability, mainly- had a reason for being, that i would understand why it was me who had to go through these things at some point.

but, i never did. i never understood why i would never be able to walk properly or be able to control the most basic of human functions. of course, i was still spiritual and aware of shifting at this time, but i never truly understood how it affects our lives every day or what it meant.

then, in 2023, ATSV came out. i had watched the first movie when i was younger, but i didn’t really understand what was going on, or bothered to remember. now that i’m older, the movie gave me an entirely new perspective to look at.

so, i got into researching about the multiverse. i began studying quantum physics for fun. i wrote a research paper about it, how it can relate to reality shifting, and it’s genuinely a subject i would study further if i was financially able to. i realized that life, in fact, isn’t linear and predetermined. that the phrase “you are constantly shifting” is literal, we are constantly shifting realities.

i (personally) believe that we are constantly shifting. that at any moment, if i truly assume and believe i’m shifting, that i’m not a wheelchair user and can walk. that my nerves aren’t damaged and i can physically do the things any other person can do. and that’s honestly what gives me the motivation to do what i do.

respawning was a very hard decision for me. i like my OR, my family and friends. i like where i live currently, how my cat wakes me up in the morning. but it doesn’t matter if i’m not happy, if i don’t feel that this reality is for me. sure, i could surround myself with people who i like and only indulge in the things that make sense to me, but if i’m unhappy with this reality, then does it even matter? respawning was a hard decision because i’m choosing to put myself first before others, i’m actively choosing to be selfish for my own wellbeing. of course, i don’t see other shifters or respawners as selfish, but myself is another story.

without shifting or respawning, i don’t know where i’d be now. i found out about shifting at a very young age, i cant remember much of my life without it. it genuinely saved me in a way, knowing that if things get too hard, if my health issues catch up, i’ll always have something to fall back on. and now, since my health issues are catching up, i’m falling back on respawning. simple as that. who cares if it’s considered selfish to some? if i consider it selfish? as long as i’ll be able to be physically able and happy, who cares?

i don’t know what i’ll consider this. a vent or rant, maybe? just felt like talking, so i’m talking. that’s all.

[neo404]

bsf to lovers with nick hcs!!!

BEST FRIENDS to LOVERS

SLOW burn. SLOWEST of burns.

You have been friends for a LOOOONG time. Like, you were one of the first persons he came out to, you were very supportive and always there for him. When you told him you also like guys (maybe you already knew or you realized it and told him) your bond became stronger.

Even when a lot of people told you guys will look good together you always shake it off.

"No, he is my best friend, Mom. I already told you. BEST friend, not BOY friend. "

He has talked and cried about guys with you and you have talked and cried about people to him. He was sure he didn't liked you in that way, but, why was he trying to convince himself of that lately?

Nick would fall first. His mind filled with thoughts of you and his poor heats aching at the thought of loosimg you. It took him sleeples nights to admit to himself that he had feelings for you.

You feel harder. It was the way Nick laughed at your dumb inside jokes, the way he called you when you told him you had a rough day, the way his hands warmed your shoulder when he hugged you from the side, the way his thigh felt against yours when the car was full. It was everything, it made your heart burn.

Neither of you were gping to confess, EVER. The both of you rather be shot on the leg twice than "ruin" the friendship.

He was going insane, he had told his brothers and mom. He couldn't bare it anymore. It happened on a spring night, the breeze messing up Nicks hair who stood at your door with his pajamas and his wet eyes.

"I like you... Like, a lot. And i cant hide it anymore, I cant. I am so scared to lose you but Im more scared of never telling you what I really feel."

There was no answear from you, just a warm hand on his cheek cleaning his tears and your lips pressing against his.

He spend the night at your place, both of you didn’t sleep that night. It was spend talking, crying in eachothers arms, hugs and kisses.

After a few weeks of akward 'what do we do now?' the both of you got used to doing traditional partner things. Like dates, holding eachothers hands, kissing eachother, cuddling, etc. That doesn't mean you stopped being best friends, in fact, it made the jokes and teasing go to another level.

"I'LL KILL YOU!" You chase Nick all over your house as he runs from you. Your hair blue from the dye he poured into your shampoo.

He is very romantic and open with you. He is used to talking to you about his problems, dreams, wants, icks, hurts and joys, so there isn’t lots of problems with communication.

100% will marry you. He knew it even before falling in love with you. He knew it by the way you held him when he cried and how you made him laugh like no one else.

Everyday he is glad he confessed. He will always say that dating your bestfriend is the best thing that anyone could do.

+His family already loves you. Since you always used to hang out whit them before dating.

"I told you, Nicky. I always told you he would be a greay boyfriend, and now look at you. You are dating."

"Mom, stop. You are embarrasing me..."

Taglist: @freshloveforthefit @shywolfapricotfan @sturnphilia @matty-bear @thenickgirl @stvrniolvsp @paige05 @soursturniolo @miloisdone1 @teenagetrash00 @lovely-calypso @h3arts4harry @malirosee

[youunravelme]

NEW FIC?? RATTHEW???? im SATTTTTTTT do u have any sneak peeks for us 👀👀👀👀 cant wait!!! <33

hmmmmm, well i guess i could give you a sneak peak rn since you're being so nice :)

the fic is split into two different timelines, before and after, so that's why you'll see "before" at the beginning of the sneak peek.

anyway, here's wonderwall

before

you were incredibly aware that you didn’t quite fit in. your mom drove you to school in a beat up 1997 toyota camry which looked incredibly out of place among the bmws and audis. your mom offered to walk you in, but she was wearing her scrubs from her night shift and her face looked tired, so you declined the offer and got out of the car yourself.

it shouldn’t have been as daunting as it was, but your old school wasn’t as prestigious as this one. your previous schools in cedar rapids had been public schools. no one was wearing a uniform, and most of the backpacks worn came from the same walmart in your old neighborhood. 

but your parents had decided they wanted a better education for you, even if neither of them had the money to fork out thousands of dollars for a private school. your mom’s parents, however, were loaded. they were more than willing to fork out a small fortune for your schooling under the conditions of your family uprooting your lives to missouri. you were too young to realize what a sacrifice that was, you didn’t notice the snide comments your grandparents made about your father’s choice of career or your mother’s choice in husband.

you didn’t see your grandparents any more than you usually did since you’d moved to missouri two weeks ago. they’d been out of town on a trip to rome up until three days ago and hadn’t reached out to have dinner or hang out at all.

not that you cared at the age of nine, you were more focused on unpacking your room. but now that you were standing in front of the giant school alone, you felt like you should’ve been more concerned with how nice your school supplies were.

a kind woman greeted you at the entrance of the school. she smiled and introduced herself, though you couldn’t hear her over the roaring in your ears. she stood next to a blond haired blue eyed boy who was your height.

“are your parents here?” you weren’t sure how you heard her over the noise in your head.

you shook your head. “my mom had to go home and my dad is at work.”

the woman blinked. “is today your first day?”

“mom, it’s everyone’s first day of school,” the boy groaned.

“i wasn’t talking to you, matthew,” she said, though her eyes never left your own.

“i just moved here,” was all you said, albeit a bit quietly. 

“well, you can walk in with us.” She placed a warm hand on your back and ushered you inside next to her son.

you took notice of her nicer clothing compared to your mom’s scrubs or your dad’s tattered khakis, though the woman’s clothing wasn’t as ostentatious as other parents’.

“do you know your teacher’s name?” the woman asked.

you nodded and showed her the crumpled paper in your hand. the night before, you were wracked with nerves and wrote your teacher’s on a blank sheet of paper and doodled around it. even at nine years old, you were concerned that you’d somehow forget. you couldn’t be more grateful for it now.

the woman’s face lit up. “oh how lucky! matthew look! you’re in the same class.”

matthew for his part, tried to look happy about it, but his eyes kept wandering to the hallways, like he was looking for people he knew. you felt bad for even being in this situation. you missed your friends from iowa and the light up shoes you used to wear before you were given a uniform.

matthew’s mom pointed out the classroom that was supposed to be yours and walked both you and matthew into the room. unlike her son, who immediately found his friends to do elaborate handshakes with, you stayed by her side. she was a stranger, sure, but she was more comforting that the classroom of fifteen other nine and ten year olds.

the woman sighed and bent down a little to look you in the eyes. “it’s gonna be a good day, sweetheart,” she said. “mr. terry is a great teacher, he’s really kind.” you weren’t sure how she would know that, but you weren’t going to call her a liar. “and if you need anything, ask matthew. he’s been going here since kindergarten, okay?”

you nodded.

mr. terry walked over and introduced himself. he had dark skin and a bright smile, showing you to your seat. your name was on a card with fun stickers on it. next to your seat, you saw matthew’s name. now it wasn’t necessarily an unpopular name, there were three matthews in your third grade class, so you weren’t holding out hope that it was going to be the matthew you walked into class with. but two minutes later, he was plopping down into the seat to your left.

matthew looked almost startled to see you sitting next to him, but when the shock wore off he gave you a crooked smile and stuck his hand out. “i’m matt,” he said, like you two didn’t walk into class together.

you shook his hand anyway and gave him a shy smile and told him your name, just in case he didn’t see it written on your desk.

if it was even possible, his smile widened. “pretty name,” he said.