#you mean the mother and daughterrr?

[conceived-angel]

i remember seeing someone say they thought sydney was a lesbian because she was "staring longingly at a lesbian couple" in sundae and that was honestly when i stopped taking people's thoughts on the characters, ships and overall show so seriously

[existentialismsucks]

D&D Story UwU (Starring My Bandit King DAd)

Alright so get this. Me and a few other duel enrollment kids have been playing about a week in the library for a few hours while we wait for the courses to start. And literally the best thing happened today during the campaign UwU.

First know that my character is a 4’2” halfling with firey red hair and 10 foot obsession with dogs(She has Teddy Bear (German Shepard) and Articus(pitbull) so far). Like my strategy with her is to get an army of dogs since she’s so weak and I’m crap at rolling her health dice. Her backstory is basically a farmer with a single mother in a village.

Anyway my partner is a 6’6” dragon born and we’re in a foreign country looking for a job. We accept this job from the chief of police or something and we go to this bandits camp to capture the king for the 500 gold reward.

We make it there. Everything’s rad. First wave? No problem. After that the next three bandits come out of the cave. Absolutely no challenge. But wait. Where’s Teddy Bear. The absolute treasure of my life. Where is he¿ wHerE mY bOi gO¿???’

I roll perception. Alright- a Bork comes from inside the cave. We sneak past three guards and make it to the next part to see my precious baby boy inside a cAgE next to the throne of the Bandit King and four bandits in the room.

Alright no biggie. Knock them out of the way no problem- only boss man up there is stoic as a rock. Not caring that the people in front of him are dead now. Great. So like dude can I have my dOg bAcC¿

He’s like na m8 get out before I wipe the floor with you. That’s fair but liKe cOnsidEr this- gimme my besT boi and I come back with puppers and give you some.( I also owe the trader who gave me this rad Gucci collar at another town). King man thinks about it and accepts.

Crew leaves. Only our mission is to catch this guy. Partner is like m8 we got too. I’m like- butT mY doG¿ no more risK plZ¿ he’s already been a single hit from death multiple times and kidnapped so mmmmmmm can we just not?

Partner wants to continue. Alright I turn him invisible. He sneaks in back to kind. Immediately spotted. (And I oop-) well they fight. King boss has ice sword. Partner has fire sword. Neato? We can snatch the sword no biggie. Wrong. Nat 20 for king. Partner is frozen solid and is moved to side of throne like a trophy.

Alright alright alright not good not good. Around 10 health left. Not good. I summon two imps. Turn myself invisible. Try to sneak in. Immediately spotted. Sh*tttttt.

Keep in mind my character has a big boi stats in charisma. Like a +5 in deception and performance, +3 in everything else. I kinda stand back in order to not provoke this gUy and I ask the DM “alrighty I gots a plan... what’s this guys stance on family and stuff?”

No answer. Alright I guess here I go. Accidentally fuCciNg roll in a weird a** way. Hehdhdhwgsjidd hecc I’m going to die. But wAiT! NAT 20!¡!!!! YEs¡

My character squints at the king.

“Are you my dAd¿”

“I mean I’ve been quite adventurous in my earlier years... I didn’t think I would have a daughter.”

I sh*T yOu nOt we my character was allowed to take her partner aNd bOTH her dOgs and lEave. Of course partner still wants but bounty and I’m like nA m8 tHats My dAd we CanT!!

Then I start thinking in the old noggerooni. Let’s just “capture” ‘dad’ and take the bounty. And break him out later. Roll for persuasion. Dads like nope. He busts out four supper trained attack dogs from behind his throne. (((( dOg aRmY??? It reaLLy iS hEr dADd. like fAther liKe dAuGhterrr)))

Partner makes three other guards betray Pa. So now it’s like 9v1. Partner rolls persuasion. Dads like aight les go.

So long story short to lost my best boi and bluffed sO well I ended up with my dogs freed, my parter freed, and convinced both the Bandit King AND myselF that he was my dad in order to escape and get the bounty.