#you guys remember episode 1 season 1? Man those were the good old days

[keithkog]

I still don’t know what a fraunhofer line is by the way.

-Keith

[imthepunchlord]

Man, hearing about the season 1 days of miraculous makes remember when we first saw the leaks of the season and first the art for the pearls and stone, Alya with the fox (and how everyone called her Volpina), and Chloe with the bee. Man, those were days. I also remember how everyone was thinking Gabriel had the peacock and Emilie had the butterfly originally. I even remember when we first got that one image of Pixie Girl, and everyone thought she was a teenage Emilie with the butterfly miraculous that was going to appear in a flashback episode 😆. Ah, I miss those days.

Gosh so much is taking me back.

I remember expanded Square chaos. I remember there were theories of Ladybug and "Volpina"/Rena being rivals/antagonists to each other as a reversal of them being best friends + clearly Marinette wouldn't trust the new Fox (which I was never crazy about, especially as you typically didn't see that for Adrien and Nino, felt like turning girls against each other); and QB and LB were going be friendly. And there were speculated shenanigans for QB and RR, I think there was also a small rise of Chloya and the idea that maybe they'd have their own Square going.

Some I didn't see, like the theory that Pixie was teen Emilie, but I did see that she was planned for the NY Special, and there were the plans for the Shanghai Special.

I really did theorize that Marinette and Adrien were going to get their own exclusive Specials to be focused on, with Marinette in Shanghai and Adrien in NY and he for sure was going to work with Pixie.

Another theory I had was where Fu was going to become Marinette's mentor, Gabriel was going to be Adrien's, cause I did like the idea that he had the Peafowl, not Emilie. And I thought this concept art of Duusu was her being furious with Gabriel literally shutting her away.

And something was going to go down and this "Paon" was going to steal the Peafowl from Gabriel.

Or she already did and what Gabriel had was a fake.

And potentially that HM was who Gabriel and Emilie feared and that's why Adrien wasn't allowed out.

Those really were the days. The theories were so fun. And much of it I think was more interesting than what we got.

And it was a time of aus. I don't know how many aus are being done for ML these days, I think most are salt fics now, but that was the time to have fun, do different spins. Doing kwami swaps. Life swaps. Cowboy au.

You could get creative with akumas, like, I remember finding old fics that swapped Marientte with Bridgette and trapped her in a different reality/timeline, and I kinda wish the Paris Special did that. Off topic, but I feel the Paris Special should've gone full comedy and full reversal for characters. And that we actually got to see this different Paris.

Like, could you imagine Marinette and Emonette swapping places, either through akuma or Bunnyx, and Marinette's scrambling trying to figure out how to get back and how to keep going in this topsy turvy world where apparently Ladybug is a villain? "Hawk Moth" is a good guy? Wtf is Chat wearing? Wtf happened to Adrien.

And you got Emonette just needing shades cause this world is so bright and sunny and why do these people keep talking to her? Tf happened to Adrien, was he a poser this whole time? HM's a villain? But of course he's a bad villain just like he's a bad hero. And ooooh she's going to have so much fun with Chloe... and who tf is this Lila and what does she think she's doing picking a fight with Emonette. Oh, she's adding her to her list...

And you could add to it if kwamis were also kinda reversed.

Emonette stuck with canon Tikki trying to get her Marinette back, but also trying to rein in Emonette, try to be that voice of reason and her consciousness, and oh, she's dumping all of Chloe's things down the toilet... she's got her work cut out for her.

Meanwhile Special Tikki is more "pure luck" and is more chaotic and sporadic, she's not outright malicious, but she's just rolling with that neutralness of luck, it having good and bad and it comes down to karma and your own actions. She's just here to sit and watch the consequences play out. Emonette was kinda funny though she was predictable in her karma as her negative actions fed negative consequences. But man, this Marinette is freaking hilarious. Tikki is constantly eating popcorn, enjoying the show cause she never knows what she's going to get with this well meaning if all over the place Marinette.

[queen-of-writing-bad-things]

Henry Danger Reader Insert | Captain Man x Reader: SEASON 1

Episode 19: Man of the House

~Junk-N-Stuff~

Gooch was excited about another piece of junk he'd bought for the store, and as usual, he couldn't wait to show it off to those living downstairs.

"Ray, (y/n). Hurry up!" He called to the slowpokes who were only just coming out of the elevator. The two friends speedily walked to the shop floor, ready to look at whatever he was so eager to show them.

"Yeah, yeah, we're coming." (y/n) yelled back, not being a person of great speed.

"Yeah, what's up, Gooch?" Ray asked, his helper following closely behind him. Gooch was looking happily at some dusty, old chair and the young woman had a gut feeling that it was what he had dragged them all the way upstairs for.

"Look at this antique chair I got." He smiled proudly at his purchase, but Ray and (y/n) weren't so enthralled.

"Okay." Ray studied the chair and didn't understand the hype surrounding the piece of old garbage.

"We're looking at it, now what?" (y/n) looked at Gooch with the same expression.

"It's one of the very first vibrating massage chairs ever made." The Indian man explained to them, but they were still confused. It was a piece of crap, why was he so excited?

"Okay." The larger male said again, not seeing where Gooch was going with this.

"Will you help me fix it up so I can relax my back?" The storekeeper asked the two, mainly (y/n) since she was handy with mechanics and could focus on a job, unlike Ray who was too impatient for a restoration task.

"No!" Predictably, Ray refused, but his helper was much more obliging.

"Yeah, sure. I'll take a look at it tonight." She smiled at Gooch, making the man's cheeks go rosy in jubilation. Their friendly moment was interrupted as Henry walked into Junk-N-Stuff, clearly stressed about something.

"Hey, guys." He said, briskly walking into the store.

"Hello, Henry." Gooch welcomed him warmly, having not expected to see him that day.

"Whoa, I didn't think you were working today," Ray said, slowing the boy down and getting him to explain why he was in a rush.

"Yeah, you look terrible, are you all right?" (y/n) expressed her concern, mentally noting how he had some shallow creases on his forehead and tired eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I know I'm not working today, but I got to go downstairs and check the crime computer. There's been a purse-snatching." He told the adults, piquing their interest.

"Oh, no biggie, just file a police report." The woman brushed off the petty crime, knowing that there had always been and always would be purse-snatching losers in Swellview.

"Who got her purse snatched?" Gooch asked, looking up from his beloved chair.

"My mom," Henry replied, making Ray's eyes light up at the mention of the pretty woman. (y/n) stiffened as she saw him visibly perk up, remembering how the last time they saw her, all he could do was flirt, flirt, flirt with Mrs Hart.

"Your mom? Wait, what happened? Is she okay? Was she hurt? What happened? Is she okay?" Ray asked, suddenly being more than interested in the crime. He put his hands on Henry's shoulders, gradually getting more and more panicked. As if in equilibrium with her best friend, the more stressed he got, the more (y/n)'s heart deflated.

"Why are you interested in his mom?" Gooch asked, feeling sorry for the poor girl in front of him as he watched her eye fill with tears.

"Have you seen his mom?" Ray replied in a high-pitched tone, not seeing how (y/n) started to drift away from him. 

"We got to help her." The man insisted, making (y/n) swallow her jealousy and blink back her tears. 'Get a grip, stupid girl!' She hissed in her mind, feeling like all she ever did was cry over her best friend and his flirting. He wasn't hers to be possessive over, so why was she so distraught?

"Ray, I'm sure Henry's father is taking good care of her." Gooch tried to be the voice of reason as he wanted to shield the young woman next to him from Ray's ignorance.

"Nah, my dad's outta town." Henry, however, didn't see his attempts to shut down the superhero's flirtatious behaviour, and he unintentionally added to the problem.

"He's out of town?!" Ray grabbed the kid's shirt and pulled his body to him in excitement. Mrs Hart would surely be the one to take his mind off his feelings for (y/n) and then his heart would stop aching every time he was near her.

"Yeah, but I can handle things." Henry quickly said, seeing the way Gooch subtly nodded his head at the young woman's dejected figure.

"No, you can't!" Ray let go of his shirt and fumbled for his gum tube in his pocket. (y/n) looked at him with wide eyes, not believing that he was going to go to Henry's house just to see Mrs Hart.

"Why can't he?" The young woman said, her voice uncharacteristically void of emotion. She knew that Henry could handle a petty purse thief, but Ray was just being a dick.

"He's but a boy," Ray replied, not picking up on her cold stare.

"Maybe, but I'm almost fourteen years old, and I've been your sidekick long enough that I can--He's just leaving while I'm talking." Henry gave up trying to lecture Ray, as his boss ran out of the store, intent on seeing his mom. The two males looked at (y/n) sympathetically as she processed the events of the last couple of minutes.

"I--uh, need to g-go to my room, 'cause I think I'm going to pass out." She said in a melancholic, joking tone, but she didn't feel like laughing. Rather, she felt faint at the thought of Ray being alone with Kris Hart and all the things they could get up to whilst Henry's dad was away. The familiar warmth of her bed was the only thing that she craved in that instance as her only other source of comfort was finding a home in someone else's arms.

~Henry's house~

Ray had easily gotten into Henry's house. Piper had answered the door and was only too happy to let the Captain Man into the living room. Henry's beautiful mom was also extremely welcoming to him, feeling flattered that the superhero had come to their house to help her after her attack. If only she knew how he running to her to find salvation for his lonely heart.

"And when this bad man snatched your purse, did he say any words?" Ray placed a gloved hand on the woman's knee, where her own hands were resting. He could feel their shape beneath his fingertips, but he removed them when, to his disappointment, they were too big for his liking, and would never fit in his palm like they were made just for him. 

"Yes, he said 'Give me that purse, woman.'" Mrs Hart imitated the man's voice and Ray wrote down what she said on his PearPad. 

"Captain Man, over here," Piper commented, moving around the superhero and taking pictures for her social media. She would get hundreds, if not thousands of likes from showing off that Captain Man was in her house, talking to her mom.

"Great, now look surprised." She instructed him, Ray being more than happy to sit and bask in the domestic setting. It was something he craved, a family, so he looked for whenever he could, despite his mind only seeing a future with one woman in particular.

"Cool. Now, duck face." The superhero pouted at the camera, much to the chagrin of Piper's mother.

"Piper, will you stop?" The woman told her daughter, wishing to carry on the questions with Captain Man. Henry came in, and to his shock/horror, he saw his boss sitting on his coffee table, getting all friendly with his family.

"Oh, Henry, look who heard about my purse and came to help." Mrs Hart and Ray stood up, as Henry's mouth fell open as he shut the door.

"Wow. Captain Man. In our house...again." His voice became more annoyed when he realised what the older man was up to and boy, he wasn't pleased.

"My son, Henry." His mother introduced them, even though they already knew so much about each other.

"Ah, yes, I remember." Ray pretended to think back to the alien extermination and gestured to Henry as he jogged his memory.

"So, why are you here?" The boy asked, even though he had a pretty good idea why already.

"To protect your mother." The superhero smirked, wrapping an arm around Mrs Hart like he had done so often with (y/n), only this time, it made Henry want to throw up. Firstly, that was his married mother, and secondly, he had way too much loyalty to the depressed young woman back in the Man Cave to like any girl Ray fancied.

"And me," Piper added, even though Ray couldn't care less about her. 

"Yeah, sure." Ray brushed her off.

"Protect her from what?" Henry asked in an annoyed voice.

"Well, whoever snatched her purse also has everything that was inside that purse," Ray explained his thinking.

"I told him about the yoghurt coupon." Mrs Hart butted in, but a yoghurt coupon wouldn't let a thief know where she lived, so the information was pretty much useless.

"Right, and the criminal also has your mom's drivers license and that means he has this address." Captain Man reasoned, his years of experience allowing him to come up with a semi-competent lie.

"And my keys." The woman added.

"So?" Henry didn't see the correlation.

"Captain Man says he might come here to the house and break in." Mrs Hart told him. Of course, Ray would say that he wanted to flirt while he still had the chance.

"That's very true. Can I make you some hot cocoa?" He crooned at the attractive mother, switching into his romantic mode. Henry felt like throwing up.

"Look, we appreciate your help, but if the guy who took her purse does come here, I can handle him." The teen pulled his boss away from his mom, but Ray was too stubborn to give up that easily.

"Really? What if he does this?" Ray grabbed onto a protesting Henry and forced him onto the floor, pinning him down so he couldn't move. To make sure he got the upper hand, the man sat on his sidekick's head, making Piper and Mrs Hart giggle.

"What are you doing?" Henry groaned.

"I'm pretending to be the bad guy who has just broken into this house and is now sitting on your head," Ray smirked with a celebratory voice.

"Ha! Come on, Henry, show us how you'd protect us now." Piper couched down beside her brother, laughing at how helpless he was. To mock him even more, she pressed record on her phone and began to film the whole situation.

"Please, get off my head." The kid pleaded with the superhero, starting to feel weirded out.

"No, I will not get off your head. That's what a bad guy might say in this situation." Ray told the two females, ignoring the boy he was sat on. 

"I don't think this would ever really happen," Henry commented, having never encountered a criminal who sat on people.

"Oh yes, it would. As a superhero, I see this kind of thing every day." Ray lied. He'd encountered some weird shit over the years, but nothing like this. He was only interested in getting Henry to back off.

"No one's going to sit on my head!" The teen snapped.

"I'm sitting on your head." The man replied nonchalantly.

"Well, I wish you'd stop," Henry said, and finally Ray relented, getting up off the boy and smirking at him in triumph.

"Ha! Your hair's all smushed." Piper laughed, finding Henry's messy hair amusing so she snapped a quick pic.

"Mrs Hart, when does your husband get back from Baltimore?" Captain Man turned to the pretty housewife, eager to spend a couple of days with her.

"Not 'til Monday." She replied, making Ray think about the 'predicament'.

"Hmmm. All right, I'll do it." He told the family, causing Henry to feel nervous.

"Do what?" He questioned, hoping that Ray wasn't about to say what he thought he was about to say.

"Stay here until your daddy comes home." He stared, making Henry blanch at his words and Mrs Hart and Piper gasp in excitement.

"No way!" The little girl exclaimed.

"Wow, thanks." Her mom added too, not seeing how flustered her son was.

"Can Kid Danger come to stay with us, too?" Piper asked with a hopeful voice.

"NO! I mean, I mean, no," Henry yelled quickly, the thought of being Kid Danger around his family sounded way too stressful and freaky for him.

"No, no, no." Ray agreed too, not wanting Henry to get in his way more than he already was.

"Why not?" Piper said in a sad voice.

"Because... Kid Danger is starring in a musical." Ray came up with the lie on the spot, which made Henry roll his eyes.

"Really?"

"A play?" The two females asked in surprised voices.

"A musical play." Ray clarified.

"Are you sure? 'Cause I've never heard about Kid Danger being in musicals." Henry looked at Ray with an emotionless face. Of all the things he could've picked, why musicals.

"Oh yeah, he's playing Annie. Oh, how Kid Danger loves to sing songs and dance about." The superhero replied, hinting that his aim was to embarrass Henry.

"Aw, that's adorable." Mrs Hart cooed at the thought of Kid Danger as a theatre kid.

"Yeah." Ray winked at Henry, who was mortified at the situation he found himself in. 

~The next day~

Intent on settling into the family, Captain Man had taken it upon himself to do some shopping for the home he had wormed his way into and was currently unloading the various items onto the table.

"Ah, Henry. I was worried you were gonna sleep the whole day away." Ray smirked at the boy coming down the stairs, who still wasn't happy about his boss inviting himself into his house.

"I just like to sleep late on Saturdays. What's all this junk?" Henry gazed over the crap on the kitchen table.

"I went to the Home Shack and got some stuff." He told his sidekick.

"Why?" The boy asked, confused as to why his boss would buy stuff for a house that wasn't his.

"Because your dad's out of town and so I figured I'd take care of some things around the house. Look! New toilet seats for the whole family." Ray showed him a peach toilet seat, but Henry wasn't impressed. He wanted the man to go back to the Man Cave, back to (y/n), where he really belonged.

"Hey, Henry. Pretty soon you can sit on me." The superhero opened and closed the item in his hands to make it look like it was talking.

"You know, you're a grown man." Henry scolded him.

"Yeah, well..." Ray put down the toilet seat, disappointed that Henry didn't share his sense of humour. '(y/n) would have laughed at that.' He thought to himself bitterly. 

"Anyway, I thought you were just here to protect us in case the purse thief shows up and tries to sit on my head." The boy reminded him.

"Henry, isn't there something else that we should be talking about?" Ray wanted to move on.

"Like?" Henry couldn't think of why he couldn't of anything else worth talking about.

"Like this report card that came in the mail today?" He held up Henry's grades, even though he had no right to bring it up with the boy.

"Ah, geez." Henry sighed, his grades weren't the best right now.

"I notice you got a C-plus in social studies," Ray said in a fatherly manner.

"You know, you're not being very cool right now." The boy said in a sulky voice. Normally, his boss was fun and youthful, but right now, he was being a grownup, and it sucked.

"You know what is very cool? Getting good grades." Ray told him. One day, he'd be a great father, but he wasn't Henry's dad, so he was really getting on the boy's nerves.

"Yeah, great. Thanks for the talk, it really turned me around. Bye." Henry tried to walk away, but Ray stopped him.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, where you going?" The superhero stood up and discarded the report card.

"To see a movie with Jasper and Charlotte." The kid didn't see the big deal.

"What movie? It better be rated G," Ray warned him.

"Dude." Henry looked at him in surprise.

"I mean it. No bad words, no mild violence, and especially no brief nudity." The superhero listed everything he thought was inappropriate, but Henry was a mature teen, he could handle a more adult film.

"Oh my god." The boy looked at him like he was insane. Suddenly, the door burst open, revealing Jasper, who had heard about the famous superhero staying at Henry's house. Charlotte trudged in behind him, annoyed that she had to be the one to keep an eye on the curly-haired kid.

"Don't bother him." She said to Jasper firmly, knowing that Ray found the boy irritating.

"Captain Man!" Jasper couldn't help but cry out at the sight of his idol.

"Ugh." Charlotte, Ray and Henry groaned. They really didn't want to deal with him right now.

"I can't believe you're really here!" Jasper bounded over to Captain Man with a huge grin on his face.

"Why'd you tell Jasper he's at my house?" Henry hissed at Charlotte.

"I didn't. Piper's been posting pics of him all over the web!" The girl protested her innocence. It wasn't her fault that his sister posted anything and everything online.

"Hey, maybe after you're done protecting Henry's mom, you can come over to my house," Jasper suggested, but the older man didn't like the sound of that. He remembered what had happened the last time he had to go to the boy's house.

"Uh...sure. Just text me your address." Ray said in a hesitant voice, scratching his ear as he thought of a way to make sure he never had to hang out with Jasper.

"Okay. What's your phone number?" The curly-haired boy asked, pulling his PearPhone from his pocket.

"Oh, it's, uh...594 triangle slash blue." He made up an impossible number on the spot.

"Got it. Wait." Jasper stopped typing when he realised he couldn't input the number into his phone, but Ray was quickly distracted when Mrs Hart came down the stairs.

"Hey, you guys, what are we doing for lunch?" The pretty woman smiled at the kids and superhero.

"I got plans," Henry told his mom, but it seemed that Ray had other ideas.

"I thought maybe we could go out for lunch." The man suggested to Mrs Hart, hoping he could get some time to flirt with her.

"Ooh, that sounds fun." She replied, thinking that the suggestion was innocent and friendly.

"Doesn't it?" Ray smiled flirtatiously.

"Uh, we're going to be late for the movie." Charlotte interrupted him, feeling creeped out at how touchy he was getting with her friend's mother.

"Yeah, let's go." Henry tried to lead them out of the house, but like last time, Ray stopped him.

"Ho, ho, ho, hold on there, plaid shirt." 

"What?" The sidekick asked, wondering what was wrong now?

"Don't you have a social studies test on Monday?" Ray reminded him.

"No." Henry lied, wanting to get out of the house before the movie ended.

"Yeah, we do." Jasper corrected him, not seeing how his best friend just wanted to leave.

"Jasper." Henry seethed. Now he'd never get out.

"I think your mother and I feel it would be best if you stayed home and studied," Ray told him, standing next to Mrs Hart like he was her husband, much to Henry's annoyance and disgust.

"What? Mom!" The kid looked to his mother for help, but she agreed with Captain Man.

"I don't think we should argue with a superhero." She told her son firmly.

"Come on, I don't want to study on a Saturday," Henry whined, thinking that what they were doing to him was really unfair.

"Am I going to have to sit on someone's head again?" Ray threatened him, but Henry wasn't about to be bullied into submission by a man that shouldn't have even been in his home.

"Hey. You're not the boss of me, okay?" He snapped at the large man.

"Well..."

"Well..." Ray and Charlotte thought about his statement since technically, it was true.

"Whatever. You're not my dad and you're not allowed to sit on my head. So why don't you just go home to your girlfriend and leave me alone?" Henry stood up for himself in a harsh tone, but his words enraged Ray. The mention of the pretty girl back home made Ray and his heart remember why he had left in the first place.

Grabbing Henry's wrist, he forced the boy onto the floor again and took his old position on his head. That would teach him not to pull on his heartstrings. Jasper, Charlotte and Mrs Hart watched the scene with puzzled faces as Henry struggled to get free.

"Okay, I'll stay home and study!" He groaned. Anything was better than having a man's butt on his face.

"You promise?" Ray looked down at the squirming boy.

"Yes. Now, please get your butt out of my ear." Henry conceded. This was going to be a long weekend.

~The next morning~

Ray was happily flipping pancakes in the kitchen as Mrs Hart sipped her orange juice. The setting was blissfully domestic; fresh fruit on the table, the smell of breakfast wafting through the air, a warm dressing gown around his shoulders. 

This was Ray's perfect family Sunday. Well, it would be if he could look up and see (y/n) waiting for his homemade pancakes. Maybe a little girl on her knee and a boy helping him cook. Perhaps even a golden retriever sniffing around his feet, looking for scraps. That was his dream, but it seemed so out of reach, he deemed it easier to find his heart a substitute, a placebo, even if it was for just a little while.

"Mmm. This orange juice is so good." Mrs Hart said to him, breaking him out of his reverie.

"Of course it is. I squeezed it myself." Ray told her, going the extra mile for his 'family'. Mrs Hart smiled at his kindness.

"Hey, Piper, hurry up! Captain Man is making us breakfast!" The woman called for her daughter. Ray winced inwardly at his official title. It was just a stark reminder that this wasn't his family, this wasn't his dream, he wasn't Ray at that moment, he was just good old Captain Man helping out.

"I'll be down in a few minutes!" Piper yelled from her bedroom.

"So... who's ready for some mancakes?" Ray presented his version of pancakes to Mrs Hart. They were just normal pancakes, but he had printed his Captain Man symbol on them, thus making them "mancakes". 

"Wow, they have the Captain Man logo." Mrs Hart marvelled at them, but even her compliments couldn't fill the hole in his chest. These weren't meant for her, he had come up with them for his imagined wife and children.

"Yeah, that's what puts the man in the mancakes." He told her, trying to get over his pining. He giggled with the woman at his ingenuity as Henry came down the stairs and frowned at his mom and boss cuddling up together in the kitchen.

"Hey, what's going on down here?" He asked, having heard all the commotion from up in his room.

"Oh, Henry, look. Captain Man made breakfast for the whole family." Mrs Hart gestured to the spread on the table, set with four places. 

"Oh." Henry looked at his smirking boss and noticed something peculiar about what he was wearing.

"Uh, isn't that dad's robe?" He asked Ray, recognising the checkered fabric.

"Yeah, found it in the dryer." The man told him, liking how the soft garment made him feel at home.

"It looks like it fits you perfectly." Mrs Hart didn't seem to think that the superhero wearing her husband's robe was weird.

"Well, it's a little small in the biceps, but what can you do?" Ray smirked at her, although he wasn't sure if she meant the robe or the fact that he was slotting into domestic life perfectly.

"Uh, you could wear your own robe and sleep at your own place with your girlfriend who you love very much." Henry knew he was pushing it, but he desperately wanted Ray to get the hint that he was lying to himself and digging the hole even deeper.

"Henry, don't be rude. Captain Man is being nice enough to stay here and protect us in case that purse snatcher comes to the house. And he's gracious enough to leave his girlfriend at home, so we should be grateful." Mrs Hart scolded her son as she cut through her mancakes. 

Ray stiffened at the continuous use of the word 'girlfriend' for (y/n). Each time it was like a stab to his heart that she wasn't at home waiting for him, he was just going home to an empty bed. If only he knew how she was crying for the same reason, his actual robe clasped to her chest.

"Oh yeah, the purse snatcher. So, what have you been doing to catch him?" Henry asked Captain Man, knowing how (y/n) was in the Man Cave sobbing over how Ray was playing happy families with someone else. He'd had girlfriends before, but he'd never dangled a relationship like that under her nose so cruelly. And with Henry's mother of all people.

"I have a lot of good ideas." Ray smiled at Mrs Hart, not wanting her to notice how Henry was rocking the boat with his questions.

"Like what?"Henry pressed. He wasn't going to let the man get away that easily.

"What?" Ray said to waste time as he aggressively flipped the mancakes.

"What ideas do you have to catch the purse snatcher?" Henry enunciated each syllable, making sure that Ray understood what he was saying.

"Well, for starters, you know I have a sidekick, Kid Danger?" Ray gave Henry the side-eye.

"Oh, yeah, I've heard of him." Henry nodded with ignorance.

"Well, since I'm Kid Danger's boss, maybe I'll make him put on a pretty dress and carry a purse through the most dangerous part of town late at night. And maybe the snatcher will take the bait  and attack him." Ray suggested, making Henry go pale.

"I...I don't think that's a very good idea." The kid stuttered.

"Okay, so you want to keep talking about this or do you want to sit down and enjoy some mancakes?" Ray smiled at him with a false nicety.

"Do you want Kid Danger to tell his other boss that Captain Man is in love with her and is too chicken to ask her out?" Henry whispered back in the same fake-happy voice.

"Mancakes, dress or getting fired, those are your options," Ray told him in a low voice, not letting Henry see how nervous his proposition made him.

"Mancakes." Henry quickly stood down and walked obediently to the table. He didn't like the sound of being bait or losing his job.

"Hey, I heard on the radio they're doing family portraits at the mall today for half off." Mrs Hart told the two males, much to Henry's horror. 

"Oooh, maybe we should go get some family photos," Ray suggested as he brought a plate of mancakes to the table. The idea made Henry feel queasy; what would his dad say if he saw them? What would (y/n) do if she saw them?

"I think that is a mantastic idea." Mrs Hart agreed, not seeing anything wrong with the proposal. She and Ray chuckled at her little pun, but Henry wasn't laughing.

"Piper, put on something cute! We're going to take some family photos!" The woman shouted to her daughter, who was still getting ready.

"Okay!" The little girl yelled back.

"Hey. Dad's in Baltimore." Henry told his mother harshly, not believing that she was agreeing to the activity.

"I know, but Captain Man can fill in for your dad." She smiled at Ray, who pretended like that wasn't what he had been doing all weekend.

"Oh no. No, no, no. Okay." The superhero 'gave in', thinking that he was finally getting a taste of family life. He put his hand on Henry's shoulder, making the boy feel very uncomfortable.

~The Man Cave~

(y/n) had been up all night fixing Gooch's stupid chair. It was a laborious job, but she craved mental stimulation to take her mind off of Ray as he galavanted around Henry's house. She hadn't bothered to change out of her pyjamas, despite Charlotte's pleading. The girl hated seeing her older friend in such a state, but at least she had stopped crying and had put down Ray's robe. 

(y/n) poured litres of diesel into the engine on the back of the chair, as the man and girl watched. She looked terrible, a shadow of herself from a few days ago, but she didn't care. How could she function when the man of her dreams was finding a family with another woman?

"Geez, how much gasoline do we have to pour into this thing?" Charlotte asked, trying to maintain her slightly happier state.

"I think that's enough." She said, stepping back with her jerry can.

"Now, let's test it." Gooch shuffled towards his chair, excitement coursing through his veins. (y/n) stood by Charlotte's side, hoping that she'd done everything right. She was no Schwoz, but she was still a decent engineer in her own right, especially when she could tinker away on a simple machine.

"Sit in the chair." Gooch motioned for Charlotte to sit down, but neither she or (y/n) trusted the rickety old thing.

"How about you sit in the chair?" The girl retorted, not wanting to break her back due to the old contraption.

"It's totally safe." He reassured her.

"Glad you think so, I think it's a piece of shit." The young woman complained to the Indian man. 

"I hope so." Charlotte did as she was told and sat down in the vibrating chair. 

"Ready?" Gooch gave her a few seconds to settle down before he pulled the rope start. The motor roared to life and the juddering caused the chair to vibrate, but from the look on Charlotte's face, it wasn't comfortable. Thankfully, she found some relief when Henry came down in the elevator.

The doors opened and the boy stumbled out, only he looked ridiculous since he was wearing a bright yellow, plastic rain poncho, red wellington boots and was carrying an umbrella. 

"Hi, everyone." He said in a dull and irritated tone. Obviously, his outfit was down to one of Ray's schemes with his family.

"We're busy," Gooch said, but his outfit was way more interesting than the dumb chair.

"What are you wearing?" Charlotte asked in confusion.

"A poncho. And rubber boots." He snapped, stomping around in the big shoes.

"Why? It was just barely raining." The girl said, but (y/n) already knew the answer.

"Let me guess, he has something to do with it." The young woman mumbled bitterly. It was then Henry took a moment to rake his eyes from her unbrushed hair to her crumpled pyjamas. He could see how dishevelled and brokenhearted she looked, which only irritated him further. This was Ray's fault.

"Yeah, I know that, but 'Captain Dad' still made me wear all this stuff "so I won't catch a cold"." Henry imitated what Ray had said to him. (y/n) swallowed at the thought of Ray being attentive and parental. She had always hoped that he would do that for their children, but her dream died on the spot at the mention of him being with another.

"And he made me carry this." Henry opened the umbrella, his face telling the two girls that he was annoyed.

"That's bad luck." (y/n) gestured to the open umbrella with a limp hand, so Henry closed it before anything worse could happen to him.

"Hey, I might have some good news for you. Come here." Charlotte said to Henry, making him and (y/n) follow her over to the computer. The young woman had no idea what she was talking about since for the last two days she had been either inconsolable or furiously fixing Gooch's chair.

"I was thinking about your mom's purse, so I went online and look what I found for sale." Charlotte pulled up a web page where a yellow handbag was being sold.

"Whoa, that's my mom's purse," Henry exclaimed, recognising the bag immediately.

"That's what I thought. Here, I'll zoom in." The girl showed them the description, which was pretty telling as to how the seller got hold of it.

"Used Kate Spod purse. Recently stolen." Henry read out in a confused voice.

"What idiot would put that in the ad?" (y/n) commented, wondering how dumb this criminal had to be to write that description.

"Right?" Charlotte agreed with her.

"So, what's our plan?" Henry asked the girls, knowing that they were better at strategy than he was.

"Well..." The dark-haired girl was cut off when Gooch tried to fire up his motorised chair again, irritating the three at the computer.

"We call the phone number on that ad, say we wanna buy the purse, and have the guy who's selling it bring it to your house..." Charlotte explained, but (y/n) beat her to it.

"And then Captain 'Comfortable with someone else's family' can nab him." She carried on for the girl, liking the plan she had come up with. 

"Yeah, and then Captain Man can move out of my house." Henry nodded along with them, glad that he had an opportunity to get Ray back to the woman before they both had a meltdown from being apart for too long.

"Uh-huh," Charlotte said as Gooch pulled the rope starter again and this time, the engine stayed running.

"It's started, quick!" The man dashed into the seat and sat back so he could enjoy the vibrating motions. However, his weight caused the motor to backfire and cut out, much to his disappointment.

"Dang it!" Gooch exclaimed and hit the side of the chest with his fist. To his surprise, the violent action caused the exhaust pipe to fall off and clatter to the floor. Gooch bit his fingernails and looked to (y/n) with hopeful eyes. She'd mend it, right?

"I'm not fixing it again." She told the man, walking off to get herself a pint of ice cream. Looks like Gooch would have to repair his chair alone. 

~Henry's house~

Piper was sitting happily on the couch with Captain Man behind her. As per her request, he was braiding her hair with expert fingers, having had plenty of experience playing with (y/n)'s. It was another situation he found himself in where he pictured another life. Piper wasn't Piper, she was a little girl with (y/c/h) locks, and she'd giggle and squirm when he pressed kisses to her cheeks, before running off to show her mother how pretty Daddy had done her hair. If only that could happen.

"You know, one time my dad tried to braid my hair." Piper suddenly said, snapping him out of another daydream.

"Oh yeah? How'd that turn out?" He asked, focusing on doing her hair. 'She'll never be yours. She's too good for you.' He reprimanded himself. 

"Bad!" The little girl said and they both started laughing, as Mrs Hart finished hanging up the 'family portrait'. Everyone in it was smiling, apart from Henry, who had a scowl on his face.

"Okay, guys, how's it look?" She said, drawing the two's attention.

"That looks fantastic." Ray smiled at her, trying to convince himself that it looked right. 

"I love it!" Piper squealed, ecstatic to have a photo of Captain Man and her family on the wall.

"Hi, everyone!" Henry suddenly burst through the door.

"It's us!" Charlotte followed in behind him, ready to end the weird dynamic that was going on in the Hart household.

"Did a guy named Axel show up here yet?" The boy asked his mom, sister and boss. He was hoping that they hadn't missed their chance.

"Axel?" Piper repeated the name. She didn't know that Henry knew anyone by that name.

"No one's shown up here," Ray told them both, making the kids release a sigh of relief.

"Good," Henry said, his muscles relaxing.

"Who's Axel?" Mrs Hart asked, also having never heard of the guy.

"He's the guy who---What the---" Henry's mouth fell open when he saw the monstrosity on the wall. He couldn't believe Ray had the audacity to go that far.

"Really? Over the fireplace? Really?" He snapped to his boss as Charlotte looked at it in horror too. '(y/n) can never hear about this.' She thought to herself.

"Who's Axel?" Piper raised the question again, as Ray just smiled at his actions. He wasn't overly proud, but he had to admit, he suited the domestic life.

"The guy who stole your mom's purse," Charlotte replied, shocking the three of them

"You found him?" Mrs Hart gasped.

"Yeah, we found him trying to sell it online," Henry explained, but Charlotte wasn't completely happy with how he worded it.

"I found it." She corrected him.

"We found it."

"I found it."

"All right." Henry stopped the argument before it could go any further.

"He's on his way here with the purse," Charlotte revealed, as Ray felt his stomach drop at the notion of having to go back to the superhero life.

"Because he thinks we're going to buy it from him." Henry carried on, wanting his family plus Ray to know what was about to happen.

"Ooh, well, what time is he supposed to---" Mrs Hart was cut off as the doorbell rang. He was here.

Everyone screamed as they sprang into action.

"He's here!" Charlotte stated as Mrs Hart panicked.

"Quick, what's the plan?" She asked, not knowing how to deal with a criminal on her doorstep.

"Uh...we all sneak out the back way and go to the zoo," Ray said, wanting to stay in the Hart household for a little while longer. 

"How does that help his mom get her purse back?" Charlotte hissed at him, hating how difficult he was being. The doorbell sounded again, obviously, this dude was getting impatient.

"Just a sec!" Henry yelled, needing a minute to sort out their plan of action.

"Go hide!" He hissed at Ray. If 'Axel' saw Captain Man in the house, the whole plan would go up in flames.

"All right!" The man growled, running hide behind the sofa.

"Okay. Everyone just sit around and act like everything's normal." Henry told them all. They each sat down and assumed a position that was completely unnatural for anyone just lounging about the house. 

"Wait! What if he recognises me?" Mrs Hart piped up, highlighting the important point. It was a possibility, but the criminal sounded pretty dumb so he probably wouldn't recognise her.

"She's right! Quick, you better come hide here, right by me!" Ray jumped up from his hiding spot and gestured for Mrs Hart to hide with him. 

"Hurry, hurry, hurry!" He said to the woman as she jogged over to where he was. They crouched down together and Ray smirked at having the woman close to him. The doorbell ran again, so with everything in place, Charlotte went to answer the door at last.

"HI, welcome to this house. Won't you come in?" She said to the shifty-looking man, who had the purse in his hand. 

"Yeah, okay." Axel looked around to see if anyone was following him and then stepped into the living room. 

"So...how much for the purse?" Henry asked the man, walking over to him.

"Oh, well, the ad said--" Using all his strength, Henry swiped the bag out of Axel's hands and tucked it under his arm.

"Ha! Now you don't have it!" He said to the startled man.

"Dude--" Axel looked at the scrawny kid and squared up to him a little.

"Captain Man!" Henry called to the hiding superhero. Ray stood up and revealed himself to the criminal, who promptly knew he had been set up.

"Aw, no way! Captain Man lives here?" He whined, showing his stupidity. Ray liked the sound of that, so he smiled and put his arm around Mrs Hart.

"No, he does not." Henry replied firmly, which made Ray lower his arm.

"Whatever, man. I guess I'm busted." Axel sighed, knowing his game was up.

"Yeah, which means you get your purse back and Captain Man doesn't have to stay here anymore." Henry chucked his mom her purse and stared intently at Ray. He wanted his boss to go home after this.

"Now, now, wait, wait, wait a minute. We can't be sure he's the real criminal." Ray stated, not wanting to go back to his loveless life of fighting crime.

"I am. It was all me, man." Axel replied, not getting why Captain Man hadn't arrested him yet. Henry flopped down next to Piper, knowing that Ray's game was up too.

"Can I see that for a second?" The superhero asked Mrs Hart, who just stared coldly at the criminal who stole her purse.

"Come with me," Ray said to Axel, leading him out of the house and shoving him onto the porch. Henry frowned as he got the feeling that his boss was up to something. Outside, Ray threw the purse back at the criminal, intent on letting him go.   

"Now, I want you to hold on to that purse and don't escape. Because if you escape, I might not be able to find you and take you to jail. No one's going to be watching you." He explained plainly, basically just letting Axel off the hook.

"You're gonna leave him out there with the purse?" Charlotte asked him, gobsmacked at the thought of Ray ruining their plan just so he could dodge his true feelings.

"Look, I realise it may seem like this case is solved, but just to be safe, maybe I should stay here for another month or two," Ray suggested, outraging his two employees. On the porch, Axel saw that no one was looking, so he took his chance and ran off with the purse before anyone could stop him.

"Okay, that's it. Captain Man, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but I think you just want to stay here and pretend to be the dad in our family." Henry spoke his mind, knowing that it was the complete truth. Ray paled at his words, and Henry knew that he had rattled him.

"Henry, be nice." Mrs Hart told her son, but deep down, she knew it was true too. She had seen how Captain Man had been so helpful with the family and knew that it was what he was trying to achieve.

"No, no. Ma'am, your boy's right." Ray admitted, his heart breaking as he accepted the truth. Mrs Hart looked at him with kind eyes.

"I love being a superhero, having all these cool devices, wearing this snug suit that makes me look awesome." Ray bragged a little to make his admittance seem less depressing.

"But sometimes I get lonely and over these past few days, I guess I got carried away with how nice it feels to be part of a real family." He looked at the family portrait on the wall and knew that even though Henry's family had been so warm and welcoming (for the most part), this wasn't where he belonged. Charlotte got up and checked the porch and saw that Axel had gotten away.

"Aw, man, the dude ran away." She complained, irritating Ray.

"Well, go get him." He replied, not seeing why he had to be the one who did all the running.

"Me?" Charlotte asked in surprise and everyone else encouraged her to go after the guy, so she opened the door and ran out to see if she could find him.

With the quietness returning, Captain Man smiled at the Harts.

"Henry..." He patted his sidekick on the shoulder.

"Piper..." He smiled down at the girl.

"Mom..." He looked at Mrs Hart fondly.

"I've really enjoyed these last few days of being a family man. Thank you for that" He confessed to her, and the mother could see that it was a lifestyle that suited him, just not with her family.

"Well, you should tell the girl you keep thinking about that you love her, and maybe one day, you'll get married and have a family together." She smiled at the superhero's shocked face, as Henry and Piper smirked at him.

"How do you know about her?" He breathed out. He hadn't mentioned (y/n) once in the few days he'd been there.

"Well, apart from Henry mentioning her, it's obvious that you love someone but are too afraid to tell them. I've seen you think about her a lot." Mrs Hart teased him and watched as his ears turned pink. Ray could see where Henry got his observation skills from.

"She's too good for me." He said in a quiet voice, making Mrs Hart put a comforting hand on his arm.

"I'm sure she doesn't see it like that." She reassured him.

"She's my best friend, I can't lose her." He blinked back a few tears as the thought of (y/n) leaving the Man Cave and his life entered his mind.

"If it's true love, she will never leave." Mrs Hart spoke truthfully, knowing that she felt that way for Mr Hart and as a result of their love, they had two beautiful children and a happy marriage.

The door opened before Ray could say anything else and Mr Hart came stumbling into the house. He was happy to be home but extremely shocked to see Swellview's greatest crime fighter in his house.

"Hey." The father said, slightly out of breath from his long journey. A car honked outside as he shut the door.

"Did I just see Charlotte tackling a grown man in the street?" He asked, but his family were too happy to see him.

"Dad!" Henry said excitedly, glad to have his real father back.

"Honey, you're home." Mrs Hart smiled warmly at her husband as Ray felt a little awkward to be in the reunion.

"Yay," Piper said in a dejected voice, sad that Captain Man was going to leave soon, but deep inside, she was also happy to see her dad again.

"I thought you were gonna pick me up from the airport. What's Captain Man doing here?" He reminded them, confused as to why the superhero was stood in front of him.

"We ran into a little problem when you were out of town." Mrs Hart told him the half-truth. 'Little' was a massive understatement.

"Captain Man wore your robe." Piper giggled to her dad, who didn't get what had happened.

"My robe? Why would he--uh, when was that taken?" Mr Hart turned around and was rendered speechless when he saw the portrait hanging over the fireplace. 

"Uh..." Mrs Hart struggled to come up with an excuse, but she didn't have to, as Charlotte came in with Axel. 

"Well...I caught him. You're welcome." She glared at Ray, feeling all sweaty and achy from chasing the man down. Man, Ray wouldn't live this one down.

~Back at the Man Cave~

"Please fix it." Gooch pleaded with (y/n), who had managed to shower and get dressed that morning, even though she still felt lousy.

"No, you broke the damn thing, so you fix it." She told him, taking a sip of her soda.

"But--" The Indian man was cut off as the elevator came down and the doors opened to reveal Henry, Charlotte and to (y/n)'s surprise, Ray. He shuffled out from behind the kids and gave her a small smile.

"Hey, I'm home." The large man smiled at her and honestly, she was glad to see him, delighted even, but she didn't want him to see that his absence had left her depressed and vulnerable. She had way too much pride for that.

"Did you have fun?" The young woman asked him cheerfully, pretending like the past few days hadn't been hell for her. Ray took her untroubled attitude to mean that she hadn't missed him as he missed her and he felt a heartstring snap.

"Eh, not really." He answered truthfully, which made (y/n)'s insides clench with happiness. She felt selfish for enjoying how his 'family weekend' hadn't turned out well, but she couldn't help it.  She wanted him to know that she could give him everything he wanted and more, but like always, he didn't see it and she couldn't put it into words.

"Is Gooch's crap chair broken again?" He asked, walking over to the man and inspecting the antique. Henry and Charlotte flopped down on the stairs behind where Gooch had put his chair, tired and annoyed that the two adults were dancing around their feelings again.

"Yes and (y/n) won't fix it." Gooch tattle-tailed, making the woman's mouth drop open at how he snitched on her.

"(y/n/n), please fix his stupid vibrating chair thing so he stops annoying me." Ray used his puppy-dog eyes on her, enjoying how right it felt to be with her again. This was what he was missing at Henry's house.

"But he broke it." She whined, throwing a mini tantrum at how she was always the one to solve everything.

"But you're smarter than he is." He replied, buttering her up so she'd agree and predictably, it worked.

"Ughh, fine, but just because I'm nice." She huffed, making Ray smile and pressed a kiss to her hairline.

"That's my girl." The man smiled at her, the kiss not going unnoticed by Gooch or the teens. How could they not see they were perfect for each other? His girl? She definitely was.

~A few moments later~

"Okay, I think I fixed it." (y/n) said, putting her rachet handle onto the table next to her. After about fifteen minutes of fiddly tinkering, she was sure that she had fixed the motor. Well, fixed it to a point where it should have worked, the thing was so old, it practically broke itself every time it was switched on.

"Charlotte, go sit in the chair," Ray instructed the teen girl as (y/n) went to sit next to him on the steps. She leaned against him and flexed her cramped hands, the muscles feeling tight after messing about with all of the mechanics. Sensing that she was in discomfort, Ray took one of her dainty hands into his and began to rub away the soreness. She smiled at the warm contact and let her head fall to his shoulder. 

"No." Charlotte flat out refused. She remembered how terrible and painful the chair was last time she was forced to try it.

"Henry, go sit in the chair." Ray switched kids, not wanting to do it himself. (y/n)'s presence beside him was much more enticing than some stupid old chair.

"All right." The boy agreed, not wanting to break up their cute little moment.

"Okay, get ready to relax and enjoy the ultimate massage," Gooch told him as he sat down, not anticipating how bad the machine was. The Indian man pulled the rope start and Henry frowned as the chair began to shake uncomfortably.

"Oh yes. (y/n), you're a genius!" Normally, the girl would've thanked him for the compliment, but she could barely hear him over the noise as she, Ray and Charlotte all covered their ears. The woman snuggled further into his side as the engine's choked growls sent shockwaves through her bones. 

However, the noise didn't last long as the vibrations from the powerful motor made the old wooden chair shake apart, sending Henry to the floor. Gooch watched as his beloved antique broke into pieces. 

"This is nice," Henry commented, finding the quietness more relaxing than the crummy massage.

"If you think I'm fixing that piece of shit again, you've got another thing coming!" (y/n) pointed her finger at Gooch, stressing that she wasn't going to rebuild the whole thing from a pile of splinters and scrap metal.

"But, but..." Gooch tried to interrupt her, but the woman's firey side had come out to play.

"It's going in the trash!" She said firmly, leaving no room for argument. The man next to her chuckled at her motherly tone, happy that he had seen sense and returned to where his heart belonged.

'Let's hope she doesn't see that damn family portrait in with the garbage.' Henry and Charlotte thought at the same time, knowing that if she did, she would never forgive Ray.

[havin-fun-imagining-twd]

Scary as a sleepy kitten

When - 10 or so minutes after He hasn't been himself, which takes place during the Chupacabra episode of Season 2

What - the finishing touches on Daryl's medical care, how Andrea's handling almost mistakenly killing the guy. You assure her that he's about as scary as a sleepy kitten right then. Then, there's digesting big bro Shane's descent from morality along with Daryl's simultaneous growth in it. Bonus is a hint regarding the Greene's barn. So sad there aren't any barn cats in there anymore, wonder what happened...

Genre - a little angsty, a little fluffy, a little found-family.

Who - You, Mangy Hick (that's Daryl), Patricia, Andrea, Papa Dale and his not good book, and sweet little Beth (who's got the same headcanon from the Fabulously Confident Reader stories about liking choose-your-own-adventure books)

Perspective - 2nd person, and 3rd Daryl

Pronouns - did GN again this time

TWs - some language, otherwise you just have a brief blow-up. The day's been something else, y'all

Length? - 10-15 minutes

References - when Daryl made that funny in Like a traditional Sunday dinner, the incident with Ed as seen in "Deserved" Part 1 but mostly Part 2 and its cooldown in It's not the end of the wo - oh. There's the continuation of big brother Shane's descent, a slow progression in a bulk of the chapters. Be sure to check out Invisible Tugging Strings, Part 1 and Part 2 , then Spell your last name, please. as well as He hasn't been himself

Official Masterlist here (find fabulously confident reader there!) and the Chronological Slowpoke Masterlist here

have fun and happy reading!

Apologies for the lengthy delay, slowpokes, my brain has been on power-saver for about a month, might could be evident in the chapter, too XD

...........................................

“Guess I'll just move this arm like a robot—oh-ho, check it, I can still do the tomahawk chop, y’all!”

And yeah, then his friend proceeds to make barely one and a half chops before wincing. The slight pout that forms afterward makes him want to smile, it’s damn cute.

“Hurt more than I thought it would.”

The twangy blonde lady looks entertained. “Tell me why, Y/N.”

Their pout turns more embarrassed. “…Movin’ the forearm requires these here muscles.”

He liked that their accent revved up more with the blonde lady—sorry, her name’s Patricia, he knows, got it.

“Which affects what?” Patricia asks.

“My shoulder and chest.”

“Which are injured and got irritated something serious today, along with what I’m fairly sure is maybe your C6 and 7, maybe the T1, whenever you first got hurt.”

“Yes, ma’am,” they mumble.

Stop thinking Y/N looks cute. Also, what were those letter-number things?

Sighing, his friend stares at their upper arm.

So, during the, like, he doesn’t know, 5 minutes or whatever it was when the old man helped him slump to the bathroom so he could finally take a piss, Y/N’s upper arm was wrapped to their torso to prevent them from hurting it more. They keep overdoing it, and they keep taking their damn sling off, so Patricia made a compromise, he guesses.

And after doing a modeling-pose type thing with their wrapped arm and asking who was wearing their gauze better, them or him, Y/N immediately tried to do the tomahawk chop and move like a robot and why is he finding that so damn cute right now?.

Patricia winks at Y/N. “Name some of the muscles up there and I won’t put the rest in a sling."

You

“Ooh, bicep, tricep,” basics out of the way. “This, um, one of these over here is the brachialis, this is the deltoid, the teres major’s under here.” You got that muscle wrong on an anatomy midterm back during college and never forgot about it. “This here is the trapezius.” Because the dudes who do the trapeze at the circus got real big ones (or at least that’s how you remember it). “And, well, the clavicle is this bone, so the bone under it is the scapula, which means right about here’s the subscapularis muscle,” that she said you may have hurt, “Oh, duh, then ‘the major one is the pectoralis.’ And—”

“—Okay, no sling.”

Phew. “Thank you!”

“For now, anyway. Meanwhile, Hersh is givin’ me a look, let’s get to cleaning our friend, here.”

Him

The funny part is, as Patricia left, she made a face and said, “I don’t remember most of the muscle or bone names, I just took Y/N's word for it. Now, Daryl, don’t go gettin’ out of bed, stay put.”

Now he’s finally laying down, nothing else to be done to him. He’s so damn tired.

He’s scrubbed up, too. Got a big-ass bandage over his head, wrapped all around. That was a trip; Patricia and Y/N washed his head and neck over a bowl. He counted the seconds til it was over, half-listened to whatever they were chatting about to distract himself.

Once he was bound up like a cartoon character and given instruction to not get it wet, Hershel came back and walked him to the bathroom again, this time to clean everything else off.

There was a little stool thing in the shower, with the shower hose on the ground instead of hanging. “Don’t get your head or the bandage wet. There's a waterproof cover over the dressing on your side that you'll have to remove when you're finished. Now, I imagine you prefer total privacy, but if you need the help, I can assist, or I can get your friend Theodore, if your prefer.”

“M’fine.”

The simple response “I’ll be outside the door, Daryl,” surprised him. Made him feel stupid and ashamed and comforted all at the same time.

And he…he needed the damn help. Ain’t like the old guy hadn’t seen his back already, anyway.

Still, the old man mostly stayed behind the shower curtain at his request, and he didn’t see his junk or nothing, Daryl made sure to keep himself covered.

Part of him felt like some pathetic little cat getting a flea bath.

Today was something else.

So goddamned tired…

You

Not 15 minutes went by since he was escorted to the washroom and now he’s fast asleep under the sheets.

Lori and you stayed inside with Carl (and Daryl), and Carol and Rick brought in plates of food into the house for the four of you.

Carol cooked up some jerky with an egg for Daryl as a special treat with the rest of his meal. Menu for tonight is peanut butter sandwiches (sort of, they’re on saltines), hard-boiled eggs (not soft-boiled, you checked this time), with sauteed field greens.

Your poor friend must be ravenous, but it looks like tiredness won this round. He looks so different asleep. Sweet, even. It's silly, but his light snores almost sound like purring and now you're thinking about kittens.

Another moment in the quiet, and you figure you shouldn’t stand there like a weirdo anymore.

Well, his egg and the peanut butter sandwiches will keep until he wakes up, and the jerky and egg will taste great either way, but his portion of sauteed field greens won’t be nice cold. You’re only a little bummed when you slide your portion of little sandwiches onto his plate and take his portion of greens. He’s earned extra treats, he can have all the peanut butter he wants after what he found today.

You inhale deeply. Exhale slowly. Close your eyes and ask inwardly for help after offering more thanks that he came back alive, and found concrete proof of Sophia.

It’s nice to be in the quiet. It feels safer better to be away from Shane right now, too. You aren’t sure what you’re going to do about the sleeping situation other than tell your brother to set up his own tent.

You also take one of the cracker sandwiches, it’s been a rough day. But when you start to nibble on it…your appetite is gone. Which is so dumb, dude, you’d been stoked at the thought of chowing down when you were high on Daryl being okay and having found Sophia’s doll.

Daryl’s chest rises and falls. You listen to his light snores, and find it, as Amy would’ve said, “interesting,” (but understandable) that your stomach has a few butterflies at seeing him so peaceful and still.

You miss Amy. Which prompts you to consider that you should check on Andrea. Earlier, Dale had come in and asked a bunch of questions for her because she was too ashamed to see people. From wherever she is right now, Amy is probably hoping you’ll help comfort her big sister.

Patricia stops you before you exit the house through the side-door. “Been meanin' to ask, I heard you tell your brother to get out, earlier. Everythin’ okay?”

That question was unexpected, words aren’t working for you. You shake and nod at the same time, which is weird, so, you open your mouth to fix it, but nothing formulates.

After a second try, all you can stumble through is “I don’t know, ma’am,” before ungracefully scooting outside.

After 5 minutes of polite conversation on the steps, mainly between you and Dale regarding Daryl’s status, Andrea is still dumbfounded that she’d almost killed someone.

“He’s really okay?”

“He’s bandaged and resting now. You only winged him, but the falls he took earlier did the most damage, Andy.” You’re trying not to be angry with her, but failing. Which sucks, because you know she was trying to protect the group…

But that she still shot it even though it was against Mr. Greene’s wishes and she knew that indicates an unhealthy variety of pride. One can't be having that kind of attitude with a firearm, it ain't good. And Daryl was almost a casualty because of it.

And like, come on, there were five of you running toward her target, it was dangerous for her to attempt to shoot from that angle! Doesn’t she understand that’s irrespons—ugh, and isn’t Shane supposed to have been doing gun safety shit with her? Isn’t that his whole wannabe jarhead schtick—great, now you’re more upset about Shane!

“I’m glad you’re enjoying those, ” Dale tells you, nodding at your cracker and chuckling. “They’re the part of dinner I rushed to help make, this evening was…something.”

He shrugs, and you remember how Daryl grunted that today was ‘somethin’ else.’

“I suppose having spread the peanut butter on crackers was a small step up from offering it on spoons to everyone,” he muses.

You can’t help but hum, a spoonful of peanut butter sounds scrumptious right now. Makes a good breakfast or snack, too.

“Did Daryl eat enough?” Andrea worries. “Does he need anything?”

“He was asleep when I brought him his supper, but I left my portion of the crackers—minus this one—on his plate.”

“Come to think of it, I’m not sure he’s a fan of peanut butter,” Dale thinks out loud. “I offered him some for breakfast one morning, and now that I recall, he backed away from it.”

Not like peanut butter?

“—Oh my God, what if he’s he allergic?” Andrea breathes.

“Nah, he ate a peanut yesterday. I was havin’ one of the little packets for lunch and he tried one, he can’t be allergic,” you assure them. And surely he doesn’t not like peanuts. That would be so sad!

It gets quiet.

Andrea stares at her feet.

“I can’t believe almost killed him.” She inhales and buries her face in her hands. “I shot someone.”

And Dale is only meaning to ease her discomfort and add some levity—but whether it’s because of the new bond you have with Daryl, or maybe because here’s something of a flashback hitting you from how you’d had to actually shoot a living person a few months ago—when Dale jokes to you, “Like I told her, we’ve all wanted to shoot Daryl,” you become livid.

After two shallow breaths of your inner tea kettle screaming, this sentence: “Guess y’all will want sunshine over here to work on her aim, then,” seethes out as you stand and book it to the fields.

The past several days especially has shown you how wrong your initial conclusions about that man were. He’s a work-in-progress, make no mistake, but shit if he ain’t working on it!

Unlike your brother, who keeps getting worse, who just tried to flirt with Lori by saying he didn’t care about a missing, abused little girl—the same little girl Daryl was willing to almost die to find!

Horrified at Shane and about today; confused, embarrassed, overwhelmed, in pain, overtired, and therefore angry about everything, you walk, hyperventilate, and finally, quietly, start to cry.

Then you accidentally drop the peanut butter cracker and cry harder.

The light swish of your boots in the grass starts to crunch when you reach the sandy part by now-boarded-up well. You walk faster, neither wanting to be near the two-part walker inside nor in the area where apparently, Daryl dumped Merle’s ‘hard stuff,’ as he slurred to you earlier during his trauma assessment.

Soon you’re by the rocks you’d climbed the other night. You step up and sit on a lower one and sniffle another minute or so until the worst of it seems to have spilled out.

When will you get a better handle on your temper?

While you’re busy wallowing in self-pity, you notice Dale’s watch ticking and are reminded that you have to return it.

You stand.

Trudge back with your tail between your legs.

He and Andrea are still on the steps.

“I’m sorry. I let my anger get the better of me,” you tell them softly.

Dale waves you over. “Come back and sit if you like, kiddo. It’s been a long day.”

“It’s been somethin’,” you mumble. “And you aren’t a bad shot, Andrea, I was being snotty.” About an inch to your left and he’d have been a goner, you leave out.

“I’m glad I wasn’t as good a shot as I’d hoped,” she sounds ashamed to say. Her head is still hanging low when she makes a one-sided smile and taps the spot next to her. “Will you be helping with shooting practice tomorrow?”

“If that’s still on, yeah.” Shane was enlisting your help with that, which means you’ll have to act civil…ugh, why worry about tomorrow, tomorrow will worry about itself. You take the watch off, hand it to Dale. “Here you go, Mr. H.”

“Ah, very good. I would hate to start losing track of the days, then we’d really be in for it. Let’s see…an hour until it’s time to wind her up.”

The breeze carries the smell of woodsmoke with it. You lean against Andrea for a moment, she leans back.

Then Shane comes into view.

When you catch his eye, you shake your head in warning in case he’s thinking about coming over and schmoozing with the others as if he didn’t just f—tomorrow will be better. Things will be better in the morning. He’ll apologize and things will be better and you’ll all have a good day and maybe Sophia will be found.

“Y/N, how about we talk later tonight?” Dale murmurs.

Did he see the face you made at Shane?

Best change the subject. “If we do, is it finally my turn to borrow that awful book I’ve heard so much about?”

“The Case of the Missing Man is not an awful book,” he chuckles back, then shrugs. “Maybe Jimmie Herron’s style isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. My Irma didn’t like his work, either.”

“Y/N, it’s really not great,” Andrea drones.

“Glenn said the same.”

“Amy had me read it so we could, um,” her gaze grows teary. She closes her eyes for a moment, then smiles and shakes her head. “‘Share the trauma.’”

You smile and shake your head, too. That sounds like Amy. “She finished it up in my tent while I was knocked out with a migraine, first thing out of her mouth to me when I woke up was how lame it was. Told me you had first dibs.”

“Then I lent it to T-Dog”

Oh, right. On the first half-week of the trek to Fort Benning, his nose was stuck in it. “He plowed on through it, didn’t he?”

“He wanted the torture to be over.”

You and she snort, Dale just chuckles again. “After you finish it, only Rick, and our young Carl—oh, and, uh your br—and Shane, they’ll be the only ones to not have done so.” He points his finger as if an idea just popped into his head. “But both Jacqui and Lori thought it was good.”

“Bless their hearts, they loved watching soaps, though, what does that tell us?” you giggle to them.

Dale lifts his hands in surrender. “See me later, troublemaker, I’ll lend you my ‘awful’ book and we can talk. I’m gonna hold you to it.” He looks at Andrea. “Young lady, will you be alright?”

“Yes. I'm just not ready to face anyone yet.”

“You know where to find me.”

She rests her arms on her knees and slouches again, stare fixed on nothing much. You go to rest your arms on your knees, too, and are immediately reminded that that particular position is a no-go for you right now.

“Y/N, after what happened with Ed, when did the feeling of wanting to hide go away?”

“Mine was an easier situation," you quietly point out. "And it wasn’t just me, Shane was the one who—" you grimace at the memory. "You were there.”

“Mm.”

To answer her question, “But I guess it wasn’t til, y’know, I faced people again that I got I didn’t have to hide. Shane's sense of 'duty' helped, too. But after I talked to Carol, saw Sophia smile at me, when I knew they were on my side, I didn’t mind so much about the rest.”

“Pretty sure everyone was on your side with that,” she mutters. “For what I just did…”

“Pretty sure even Daryl will, um, well th-that you were tryin’ to protect the group.” …oof.

She lifts her eyebrows. “You aren’t good at lying, Y/N.”

It wasn’t a lie, per se. “Objectively, you were tryin’ to protect the group.”

“I wanted to feel in-control and like I could do it.”

Oh.

She admitted that? If only your brain could come up with something heartfelt or whatever the situation called for to convey how much humility from someone so confident and self-assured means, instead of this: “I wanna be on your apocalypse survival team.”

A sigh leaves her, and she simply asks, “Just let me know how furious he is with me. I'm dreading how he’ll be when he’s up. I'm a little scared, while I’m being honest.”

“Hm?”

“Daryl.”

“You’re scared of him?”

She eyes you. “We’ve all seen how he can fly off his handle. He waved that knife at Rick and your brother, the axe at Jenner.”

Oh, right. That didn’t even consider cross your mind, that she’d be scared of his reaction to...being shot in the…head. Man, your brain is not working.

It can’t even configure a response again, now you’re just shaking your head like a confused mute.

“You don’t think I have to worry, Y/N?”

“No,” you answer truthfully. “You might would feel better if you saw him, he's probably up an eatin' dinner by now."

"I think now's too soon."

"Trust me, he’s holed up in bed now, he’s about as scary as a sleepy kitten.”

“Kittens have teeth and sharp claws,” she dryly states.

Your mind immediately hops to the exciting fact that you have yet to meet the Greene’s barn cat(s) as you stand and lead Andrea inside through the side door to get to Daryl’s room, waving to Beth reading her book as you pass.

“Beth, this is Andrea. Andrea this is Beth. She’s the one who made the pudding for Carl. She’s Mr. Greene’s youngest.”

Andrea smiles and goes in for a shake. Beth shyly waves, the returning of the handshake ending up as an awkward afterthought.

Sweet as she is, leaving her in peace is probably what she’s hoping for (the poor teenager’s home and front yard is full of wounded strangers).

And you almost make it through the full sentence before gasping in delight when you see what book she has.“We’re just checkin’ on Dar—is that a choose-your-own-adventure book??”

Him

There was this loud noise in another room, woke him for a second. Y/N’s laugh stuck out from the other sounds.

While falling back asleep, he remembered how he'd made them laugh really loud when he ripped that $20 bill that night at the CDC. How they’d belly-laughed so hard at his dumb, tipsy-ass joke had felt so damned unexpectedly good.

He’s back asleep before the amount of pain he’s in can really register.

You

“I’ll bring it over after I talk to Mr. Horvath. He’s the older man in our group, I love him to pieces, you probably saw him in his bucket hat?” you tell Beth.

Jimmy apparently has been poking fun at her reading choose-your-own-adventure books to pass the time because they’re ‘for kids,’ so, lending him The Case of the Missing Man was decided to be the best way to get back at him.

You hope y’all didn’t wake Daryl, it’d gotten a little animated for a minute. To make up for it, you tiptoe when you trek down the hall to his room, Andrea and Beth behind you.

Beth left something of hers in there before he was brought in, but she was hesitant to go in there (which you praised, teenage girls and unknown older men don’t mix). Anyway, she was hesitant because she’s a little, um, well, kinda intimidated by him.

Andrea invited her to join you two, citing “Y/N says he’s as scary as a sleepy kitten right now.”

At his door, you knock lightly and call his name. Wait for an answer, try again.

Upon listening more carefully, his snores sound through the door and let you know he’s still asleep. Slowly, slowly, you open it.

As subtly as you can, you step into room and pull the sheet that had fallen down back over his shoulder before the girls see the scarring.

Daryl stirs, then grunts something incoherent as he flinches, blinks, and tries to turn toward you.

“It’s just me,” you hush. “I was fixin’ your sheet, it’d fallen.” You tuck the sheet down over his shoulder, gently and slowly. “You’re safe in the Greene’s house. Go back to sleep, sweetheart.”

His muscles relax and he’s back to snoring before the pet name is finished slipping out of your mouth.

Still standing beside him, you watch his side rise and fall, rise and fall. Reminds you how grateful you are. He really does look so helpless and sweet right now.

You notice Beth peeking back and forth between you and him, but she quickly looks away.

Poor buddy. If the man is this tired, he’ll rest better with closed curtains. He’s big on privacy, besides. Carefully, you start to draw them shut. Andrea joins.

Once they’re all pulled closed and the room is dimmer, she puts her hand on your arm and gently pulls you back into the hall, Beth leading the way. You make sure the door doesn’t make too much noise as it shuts.

“Thanks,” Beth whispers.

“Scary as a sleepy kitten, right?” Oh, that reminds you, “Y’all don’t have a barn cat or two, do you?”

“N-not anymore.”

Aw, that’s sad. “I’m sorry, little one.”

“Oh, um—d-don’t get too close to the big, shuttered barn, okay?” she rushes to add.

Before you can both nod and tell her ‘of course,’ she then stumbles through, “There’s—it’s—the, um—it’s just not real safe!”

She looks so freaked out and nervous that you forget you’re supposed to respond.

Lucky for you, Andrea, smooth as ever, assures her “We’ll let Carl know not play around there,” and starts to chat about how she “steers clear of old barns” ever since she spotted “the biggest rat I’ve ever seen come out of one at a company retreat,” while Patricia comes downstairs hugging to her side what looks like a wedding photo.

Beth scurries away, you make eye contact with Andrea, then Patricia gets your attention.

“Sweet pea, about tonight,” she begins, hands pressed together with her fingertips toward you. “Daryl’s gonna need to be checked on—”

“—Of course. I’ll stay with him. Please do me a list of what to check for and how often?”

“Will do. Try and borrow that big watch again, you’ll need it. Prolly will do well to have somebody else, maybe Carol to help. I'll go find her. You know, there’s an old air mattress in the attic, I’ll have Jimmy fill it up. Just go grab your sleeping bag,” she tells you.

“Thank you!” You’d been hoping for a way to avoid Shane all night. Is this a gift from above or something?

A reminder of, “Don’t use your injured side to carry your sleeping bag in,” from Patricia sends you on your way outdoors to retrieve your stuff.

The air is cooling off as the sun sets. The sky is a hazy orange-pink.

“Y/N, I didn’t realize,” Andrea says, slowly walking beside you.

“Realize what?”

“You two.”

You, too? Is she talking about your shoulder, maybe? “What’d I do? Do you mean my wrapped arm?”

She peers at you, head tilted to the side. “You and Daryl,” she softly clarifies. “It was Dale who wondered first, after you had to excuse yourself.”

Me and Daryl? “What’d we do?” Perhaps she's referring to the search today? Andrea isn’t one to not speak her mind plainly, you wonder why she’s not being more succinct. She doesn't know about you having shot that guy. Dale has an idea, but he's tight-lipped about it.

“So, you and he…?” she trails off.

?

So, you start to fill her in about the search. “Before Daryl found the doll, we’d—”

—OH WAIT, now you get it!

---------------------------

---------------------------

(for those wondering, the tomahawk chop is something Georgia Braves fans do)

> Masterlist link here

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[cutepastelstarsalior]

Clone high living blogging

Episode 2

Oh wow the second hand embarrassment is SO strong when Joan was asleep in class…..

……..Joan knows about Wiccan stuff AND she practices it?? I mean I guess that makes sense seeing as her clone mother was a French saint?

“Women just weren’t friends with each other like that” GIRL what do you mean?????? Like in context Joan is saying she wants friends. I know that the show had a very small character group but ?????? That didn’t mean girls didn’t have girl fiends???

Oh there breaking the 4th wall again…….i feel like this is gonna happen a lot.

Joan really said “im not like other girls”

Harriet and Frida give those vibes of girls who pretend to be friends with the outcast only to betray and bully them…I don’t trust them.

Nooooo jfk don’t have any guy friends because ponce is dead noooooooo :(

Ah hell yeahhhhhh the blue background bathroom are back!!!! :)

Nooooooo Joan had a new foster mom!!!! Cleo’s mom and toots are probably dead :(. Hmmm that makes me wonder, HOW do the clones feel about their family might be dead? Like to them it’s what, been a day? 2? Since they got unfrozen, so it must be so jarring to hear that their family might be dead or something. :(

NOOOOOOOOOO TOOTS IS CANOTICAaly dead :(

Oh no jfk learned out the internet/tiktok

Frida and Harriet murder someone….surprise but not really….

JFK and there getting into an internet battle? :/ ok…do those “correct grammar in arguments” things really happen??? Like in real like?? It feel very specific……

Episode 3

“My boy toy jfk”

Seeing the gang having anxiety is interesting….Lind of gives them characterization…

I feel like this season is very Joan-centric while last was Abe-centric. Mmmm if there is a third season will it be focused on jfk? Or Cleo?

Topher has a emotional support possum :)

It’s neat to see Harriet fear/anxiety of being a “basic wine mom”. I like to think that she just has a fear of motherhood, or like, Amatonormativity.

Them beat the heck out of the monster while saying their fears is so cheesy. Then them saying “oh it’s (insert celebrity name here) from (xyz) is soooo scoops doo like. It’s also cheesy.

Doc….why do your nipple look so gross?

Ooohhh 👀 the clones that got taken are mind controlled 👀

Episode 4

Weird….zombies??? Goblin??? Things

I feel like the reason Joan feels odd this season is because she actually feels very passionate about stuff? Like off the top of my head the only times I remember seeing her very emotional was over Abe, not being allowed to play baseball, anything with Cleo, and the snowflake day. Like, all those time where of anger or yearning so seeing Joan happy/motivated is…..odd.

I still can’t get over Cleo voice. It sound so…high? I’ll why but I keep remembering Cleo old voice as lower?

Oh! I’m right! Her voice WAS lower, (watch a video complicated in Cleo and compare it to her new voice) :/

Ha. Cha cha smooth parody.

Oh sweet! Finally some cool stuff on how the old clones interact with the new one. Aka Joan lie and say the coffe is made from child labor and everyone believes it. Hmm very interesting take on stuff! Like ughhhh media criticism and cancel culture and stuff. Idk man I can’t explain it…

…….. awww we could had have a Joan and Cleo moment were they bond and stuff :(

Did Abe and Cleo ever breakup or are they still a couple?

Hehehe valley girl accent <3

:0 homesteader Cleo!!! Joan did a backflip….neat

:( I just realized I laugh more/chuckled more in season 1 than in season 2. So far the only time I laugh is when slow float about to hit Joan. :(

God I hate Confucius outfit. Dude why are you a triangle??? Why do you’re legs not match you’re top??? Harriet outfit is fine, still an eyesore color wise but fine.

YAY MR B AND JOAN!!!!! Love their friendship :)

YES!!! YES!!!! JOAN AND CLEO FRIENDSHIP???? Or at least no longer enemies!!! Whooo!!!!!!!!

Episode 5

10 years non union internship…..damn. 👀 hmmm would that be a good job? Like if the pay is good and manageable hours then 👀

*looking up clone high Harriet because I was curious why Harriet wants to distrance herself from her clone mom* *see that in season 1 there was already a Harriet* ???????? What….what happened to the original clone? Was she not frozen and she died and Doc was like “yeah likes remake a new Harriet clone lol”

Yay musical episode :)

Oh wow they are good singers, mostly Harriet and Frida

OMG PONCE’s DAD IS BACK yippie!!! :)

I’m like 99% sure that’s not how Footloose works. Wasn’t the dancing ban happen because of a drunk driver or something in the movie?

:( the husbands don’t get along anymore :( Mr b is so catty now

“Abe can’t sing, can’t dance…” i don’t think he even knows karate? I don’t think he’s going make it/lyrics

✨ white guy confidence✨ …………….don’t drink Abe sweat….

Harriet being a pushover/not wanting to speak up against her friend 👀 (also side note it seems like Frida and Harriet stop hang out? Or rather Joan and Harriet are closer friends then with Frida??)

Oh gross they actually drank Abe’s sweat….

Harriet likes her play! It’s different from Joan’s and that fine! Love that Harriet stood up for herself and wants to do her own thing

Oh hey Vincent van go! :) he spoke!!

The said fuck! Literally the first time it happen on the show!! :0

The quiche medphor is nice :)

…..these nerd didn’t try a second time? Also Cleo can dance! She did it with Ashley angel (no pun intended) and she dance at prom????

“Practice makes progress” :) wise words Frida!

Harriet is a good singer

Oh no is jfk and Harriet going to get together???

Ok I think Harriet may be my favorite new clone…

NoOOOOOOOOO NOT THE DINNER !!!!! :0 it’s burning!!!!! Nooooooooooo

[sheepinthebigcity]

rating every cartoon i’ve watched stoned based on how good a stoner show it is

as told by ginger: pretty solid. what starts off as a yuri plot turns into a straight soap opera, which isn’t as good. the appendix scene high is a fucking trip tho 7/10

king of the hill: seasons 1-7 are REALLY good for weed. seasons 8 and onward, not so much, but you can get a bit out of them. makes you understand what those tvtropes guys were on about. 9/10

inanimate insanity invitational: this show was made to be watched while high. it’s not a good show, but every single joke feels hilarious that’s what really matters. 10/10

kim possible: don’t watch kim possible when you’re high the show gets so much worse. you can notice the weird animation a lot easier and you realize how much of the dialogue is proto-marvel. 2/10

penn zero part time hero: i don’t remember anything. 4/10

higglytown heroes: this show while high feels like a guided meditation among b-list celebrities being lead by a five year old. 9/10

teamo supremo: feels like nails are scratching at your brain for some reason. 0/10

hamtaro: kind of annoying. you start to get an inkling that laura’s dad Knows about the ham-hams. 5/10

elena of avalor: it’s good high but it’s also just as good sober. points off for me having to go through the immortality song while high. 8/10

futurama: you’d think this would be a good pick but really the entire time i was coding what voice actor was doing what impressions and who among them could have had gender dysphoria. 6/10

rugrats (2021): one of the babies was racist, grandpa lou was a bisexual man who did shrooms but he’s straight and straightedge now, and stu stepped in chuckie’s piss. 0/10

bluey: if you perceive bluey as a show intended for grown ups disguised as a kid show, you’ll get nothing out of it. if you perceive it as a show for babies and act as though bandit is the prime antagonistic force in bluey’s life, it’ll be fun. 7/10

robot and monster: was a fine weed show until i got to the episode where robot’s brother started abusing him physically and financially. then i felt miserable for days after. 3/10

motorcity: like elena of avalor, it’s already fun sober, but it’s cool to notice how each burner feels like a character from a different show. 8/10

the rocketeer (2019): like king of the hill, very subdued, which means it’s PERFECT for stoners to notice the minute details and act like the characters are stronger than they are. 10/10

xiaolin chronicles: DON’T. -10/10

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Looking for a Place to Happen

Warnings: non-consent sex and rape (series), age gap, general stupidity.

This is dark!biker!Sam Wilson x reader and explicit. 18+ only.  Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Series Synopsis: There’s lots happening in Birch and you find it all too amusing.

Sister series to Smalltown Bringdown, When the Weight Comes Down, Little Bones, and Fully Completely

Note: We’re starting Sam’s installment but this weekend I’ll probably only be catching up on my headcanons and drabbles because I’ve been a lazy bitch and I’m sorry to those who have been waiting.

Thanks to everyone for their patience and feedback. :)

I really hope you enjoy. 💋

<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!

Chapter 1: I've got a job, I explore

💀💀💀

The sleepy town of Birch was awake. 

In those last weeks, the arrival of outsiders had roused the attention of many once passive residents of the timeless territory. Those brick buildings unchanged by the tick of the clock inlaid into the old tower above the library that chimed every hour on the hour. They still stood with only chips in the mortar but the air tasted different. The frost was more bitter and the sky more grim. An omen of something no one could predict.

It was the perfect setting for a screenplay. The isolated town with its unsavoury secrets and the visitors who threatened to bring them to the surface. It was inspiring to you, to imagine what was hidden behind the stern wrinkled faces of the town elders and under the jackets of those men who wore the cut of the local club. The bikers ruled the town covertly but everyone knew that Bucky Barnes’ palm was lined with the map of Birch.

As a bystander, an unnoticed observer, just another ant in the hill, you watched from the side and amused yourself with the drama of others. It was like a soap opera or another HBO hype machine. Those things you aspired to when you could be free of this ho-hum town.

The snows added to the natural gloom of the place. The deep heaps smothered the noise and harkened back to those days of colonial settlement. Forgotten, desolate, fearful. 

You ventured down in your heavy boots that stretched to your knees and pushed your chin down into your scarf. As a child, you ran and jumped in those piles, now you were out of breath just trying to walk past them.

You stopped in the bakery that doubled as the only café, a place where the owner, Babs, tried to to intimidate the last caffeinated trends. She was always a few seasons behind but you didn’t mind so much. 

You ordered the salted caramel mocha and waited patiently as the quiet woman fought with the steaming machines. She was older than you but you’d work with her for one summer during high school, only five years ago. She had the eyes of a child still, but there was something worn in her. As if she’d been exposed to far too much in her three or so decades in that place. She was a harbinger of what you didn’t want to become.

You thanked her for your drink and set out once more into the billowing winds. Birch winters were never kind but this one was crueler than most. Your teeth chattered as you blew the steam away from the lid and hugged it with your mittened hands.

You stopped short as you heard the familiar ding of the diner door across the street. You recognised the mechanic who kept to herself and once growled at you in the grocery store. She stormed across the street, followed closely and quickly by a black-haired man you’d only seen once before. He was one of those outsiders who came to deal with the club men.

You sped up as you sensed chaos brewing and pulled out your phone as you balanced your paper cup in your other hand. You flicked your camera on just as you got to the front of the shop and the man grabbed the mechanic. You let out an ‘oop’ as she turned on him and you aimed the lens at the couple as they fell into the snow, the man’s shoes giving little traction to his steps. 

You moved closer, stunned by the scene, and kept your cell phone rolling as you found a better angle around the snowy walks. As she choked him on the ground he elbowed her and she coughed as she rolled away. She snarled as he clamoured to his feet, slipping and sliding as he marched away.

You killed the recording and watched the man cross the street again, nearly wiping out as he did and when you looked back to the mechanic, she was gone behind the clattering door. You chuckled to yourself and tucked away your cell. It was prime footage for TikTok; with a bit of editing, it would be comedy gold.

💀

You stomped up the steps of your grandmother’s house, this time through the front door as you heard her chair rocking in the front room. You usually took the stairs in the back as you paid her to live on the upper floor of the duplex. You checked in with her daily, she didn’t get out much more than the occasional trip to the grocery store when you couldn’t or you dragged her out to join you for a tea at Babs’.

“You’re late,” she grumbled as you set your cup down and unzipped your coat.

“For what?” you scoffed.

“It’s after noon and you don’t even come down to say hello? A ‘good morning, nan’,” she harrumphed.

You chuckled and hung your coat before shoving your boots over on the mat. You grabbed your mocha and leaned on the doorway as you watched her crocheting in her chair, reruns of some court show playing from the boxy television.

“I was working,” you said, “sent in some stuff for review. Hopefully not much work to be done.”

“I don’t know how you make money on that interweb,” she bemoaned, “I don’t trust it.”

“Maybe you’d trust it more if you used the Netflix subscription I got you,” you crossed your arms, “then you wouldn’t have to watch trash daytime TV.”

She shrugged and muttered under her breath. She could be crotchety but you liked her sense of humour. Your aunts and uncles never came around because they just took it as spite. You were the only one who knew how to handle the jaded old lady.

“Maybe you coulda looked out the window,” you snickered, “quite a show going on in town.”

“Hmm, what’s that?” she stilled her needles and reached for her tea stained cup.

“Just a fight. You wouldn’t believe it, that lady mechanic beat the shit--”

“Language,” she huffed.

“Anyway, she had this guy in a chokehold. It was awesome.”

“What guy?” she squinted at you over her glasses.

“I dunno. Some out of towner. Remember I told you about that burly dude hanging around the library?”

“There’s more?” she sucked on her teeth, “those bikers have never been good news and now they’re bringing in more.”

“Yeah, well, what’re you gonna do?” you sniffed as you took out your phone and rewatched the scuffle with the volume down. You shook your head and opened up your TikTok. 

“I don’t understand why you’re always on your dang phone,” your grandmother pestered.

“I’m not always on my phone,” you smiled at her smugly, “there are those time when I’m listening to you prattle on or you know, making you tea, oh, and cooking you dinner. What was it I did last week? Oh that’s right, I got Pippin out of the crawlspace.”

“I’m too old to be chasin’ that cat all around,” she huffed, “where is he anyway?”

“He’s your cat, I don’t know? Last time I saw him, I sent him back out the window for shredding my charger.”

“He knows you need to give it a rest,” she laughed to herself, “got your nose to that screen too much.”

“And what do you do, old lady? Crocheting doilies to put where exactly?”

She gave you that dry smile, the one that said watch it but carried a hint of humour still. You hit post and put your phone away as you waved off her irritation.

“Well, you know what, I sit all day at my computer, doing who knows what and you know what it got me?” you taunted, “a large mocha!” you sipped as you sat on the sofa and grabbed the remote, “and it’s paying my rent and putting bullet points on my resume.”

“Mhmm,” she scowled, “just remember, real life ain’t online. Those videos you’re always laughing at like hyena, that’s not reality. You forget it and it’ll come back and bit you. ‘Specially with those bikers.”

“Oh, nan, you know too well, don’t you? Didn’t you have a fling with one back in your hippie phase?”

“Two, actually,” she raised her brows, “I was young and stupid. Not like you, but still.”

“I love you too,” you chirped and sipped from your cup, flicking the station to Jerry Springer, “that’s more like it.”

💀

Your usual TikToks were sarcastic and dull complaints about your small town life. The response was less than pleasing but it gave you an outlet to vent. You liked to goof around and document the very specific type of weirdos that resided in Birch. But the video of the fight in the snow blew up your phone and made it difficult to ignore the buzzing as you went back up to your room to eke out the last of your captions for the ad agency.

When at last you could call your day hard-earned, you logged off and sent in your hours to the agency. Social media promotion was easy enough but the working gigs for a thousand different companies was tedious. You hoped you could build your portfolio enough to manage a single corporate page as you continued to chip away at your creative outlets.

You picked up your phone as you waited for Netflix to load on your tiny smart tv and flopped onto your bed, not two feet from your desk. You hit the icon in the upper panel of your phone and scrolled through the notifications, pausing to turn on another episode of the cable sitcom from ten years before. You snorted as you read each comment but the number under the video made your eyes round. The thing was bound to go viral.

As usual, you went down to help with supper. Pippin, the orange tabby, returned to cry at his dish and you fed him too. Your nan peered through her glasses at a crossword as she tasted the tangy pasta sauce. 

“More basil,” she snipped.

“Well, I asked if you wanted to help,” you muttered, “I think it’s good.”

“Hmmp, I need milk,” she jutted her chin out, “for my after-dinner tea.”

“You couldn’t say something like three hours ago?” you blinked.

“I could have but I didn’t,” she snickered. You rolled your eyes and she took another forkful of penne and filled in another line on her puzzle, “ah, no hurry, girlie, you know I’m patient.”

“Patient? You?” you chuckled as you took your plate and shoved it in the microwave to keep it warm. The ancient thing had a dial and the door stuck, “I’ll just go get it over with.”

“Don’t forget your mitts,” she called after you as you tramped into the front room, “it’s cold.”

You pulled on your knitted cap and matching mitts. You zipped up your parka and shoved your feet into the deep boots. You grabbed your wallet and buried it in the spacious pocket. You bounced out the front door and down the steps as the sky sent down another coat of powder for the night.

You went up White Forge Street and through the short path behind the diner that led to the main road. You glanced over at The Asp, the beacon of the dull town, and turned towards the grocer. Like anywhere in Birch, the store was outdated and stuffy. It felt like stepping into another time with the paper bags and chunky tills.

You went down the center aisle and stopped at the fridge to search through the frosted glass. Your nan only drank whole milk and the last time you carelessly grabbed skim, she whined that even Pippin wouldn’t drink it. She was particular but that was just her nature. You couldn’t say you were any less fussy in some instances.

You grabbed a jug and the door slapped closed against the worn rubber seal. You headed up the candy aisle and brushed your woolly thumb over your chin as you considered gummy bears or Reeses’ Pieces.

“Hard choice?” The deep voice jolted you.

You snatched the box of chocolate and looked over at the man in leather, his chin tucked down behind the collar as snow dusted his shoulders.

“Sure,” you said as you brushed past him.

The cut of the leather told you he was better not entertained. While you thought the men amusing, you weren’t stupid enough to engage with them. You rarely listened to your grandmother but she was wise in her own way. 

You knew a girl in highschool, she was fucking around with one of the club men in her junior year, she ended up with a baby and no support. You didn’t think he was into you that way but he could hardly have innocent intentions.

“How’s the old lady?” Clayton asked as he rung in your order at the end of the belt, you moved along with the groceries and pulled out your wallet.

“The usual, you know? She’s tryna quit again. Don’t know how long it’ll last.”

“Oh yeah? I’ll keep a carton aside for her,” he kidded as you felt your phone vibing in your back pocket.

“Don’t encourage her,” you swiped your card and punched in your pin, “although I don’t know what’s worse; the smoke or her sucking on those mints all the time.”

“Oh, it’s not the bitchin’?” he laughed.

“That, too,” you scooped up the paper bag and put your wallet away, “have a good one.”

As you came to the end of the first counter, you were nearly cut off by the club member as he swept around from till two. His own purchase of a car magazine and jerky was tucked under his arm.

“Ah, sorry,” he smiled, a sparkling smile, almost charming.

“No worries,” you continued on and he followed close behind.

“Those mitts look real warm. ‘Specially in this weather,” he said as you pushed open the door.

“Uh huh,” you kept on as your boots crunched out into the snow.

“You know where I can get a pair. Leather isn’t exactly thermal, you know?”

“These? My nan made ‘em. I’m sure Clayton got some hung up back there,” you looked across the street as you stepped up onto the ledge of snow between the sidewalk and the road.

“Am I bothering you?” he asked.

You looked at him dumbly and almost laughed in his face. You glanced back across the street then down towards The Asp.

“Sorta,” you answered.

“Make you a deal. Leave ya alone for your name.”

You eyed him. He was older than you like many of the Commandos. At least a decade, likely more than that. You chewed on your hesitation and cradled the bag more firmly against your side. His eyes strayed as he tried to see through the thick layer of your coat.

“Nah, I’m not s’posed to talk to strangers,” you said and hopped off onto the road.

You heard him behind you as he struggled to follow and as you came up to the other side, he came parallel with you and kept stride with you easily.

“I know you’re young but you’re not a kid,” he intoned, “what’s the harm in a name?”

“It’s a small town,” you stopped short of the end of White Forge, “I think I know enough about you to avoid you.”

“Oh ho, is that it? Well, I’m Sam, I’m not a stranger now, am I?”

“Not interested, Sam. Sure there’s women your own age over at the bar,” you nodded behind him.

“You wanna come see? Maybe have a drink?” he gave a crooked grin.

“You don’t give up, do you?” you shook your head, put off by his forwardness.

“Well?”

“Not tonight, Sam,” you turned around and headed down White Forge.

“Then what night?” he asked but you didn’t answer and he didn’t follow.

You turned down onto your street and refused to look back in case. It would be best not to mention the run-in to your nan, she was paranoid enough as it was. Besides, you’d forget about it by the end of next week.

[bi-bard]

Please Say That You're Joking (Pt.1) - Chuck Shurley Imagine (Supernatural)

Title: Please Say You're Joking (Pt. 1) [You can read part 2 by clicking here!]

Pairing: Chuck Shurley X Winchester!Reader

Requested: Nope

Word Count: 2,930 words

Warning(s): mentions of sex, threats of violence

Summary: (Season 4; Season 11) (Y/n) had a single one-night stand while coping with loss in a not healthy way... if only they had a clue about the weight of their actions.

Author's Note: I was recently going back through some of the "lighter" episodes of Supernatural because I wanted to watch something I could chuckle at. That's where this came from.

This might be the most crackheaded thing I've written in a while.

Also, the amount of things I had to bullshit my way through this is actually ridiculous.

Hey! I did a rewrite of the ending of Supernatural. It took a really long time to complete, so it would mean a lot to me if you check it out. Here’s a link! (it’s on my personal account)

-------------------------------------

Sam, Dean, and I walked into the motel room. We were all confused and slightly scared.

We had gone to a comic book shop to do some work on a case. However, we were then called fans.

Fans of what?

Well, fans of a series of books about our lives.

I was the middle Winchester child. Two years younger than Dean, two years older than Sam. I was beyond confused when I saw some weird, romanticized version of me on the cover of a book.

"This is so weird," I mumbled, plopping onto one of the beds in the room.

Sam jumped onto his laptop and started researching. Dean was holding one of the books, reading through it. I didn't even want to touch it.

"I don't like how he describes (Y/n)," Dean commented. "It's weird. It's like he's in love. Listen to this..."

Dean dramatically clears his throat and starts to read in an even more dramatic voice, "'Even after a hard hunt, (Y/n) could easily be seen as the most beautiful of the siblings. They mimicked the beauty of their mother more than their brothers. There's no bruise or cut that could take the loveliness away from the natural curves of (Y/n)'s face. If only they could see how everyone else would stare-"

"Okay, ew," I muttered, walking to the table. "What'd you find?"

"Well, it seems like Carver Edlund is a pen name," Sam shrugged. "And the fans are intense."

"As in," Dean asked, closing the book and joining the two of us at the table.

"Well," Sam handed me the laptop so Dean and I could look at it, "there's fanfiction. About all of us."

"What's this, 'Sam/Dean'," I asked.

"It's... me and Dean... together."

"They just don't care that we're related," Dean asked. Sam nodded.

"God, this is so weird."

"So, how do we find this guy," I asked.

--time skip--

We managed to find the publisher of the novels and found her house.

"So, you published the 'Supernatural' books," I asked as we walked in.

"Yep," she nodded. "Yeah, gosh. These books... they never really got the attention that they deserved. All anybody wants to read anymore is that romance crap."

"Could not agree with you more," I said. "We're hoping that our article can shine a light on an underappreciated series."

"Yeah, because, you know, if we got a little bit of good press, then maybe we can start publishing again," she replied excitedly.

"No, no, no," Dean immediately shut her down. "I mean, why... why would you want to do that? It's such a complete series with Dean going to hell and all."

"Oh my god, that was one of my favorite ones," she rambled. "Dean was so strong and sad and brave. And Sam... I mean... the best ones are when they cry... like in 'Heart' when Sam had to kill Madison; the first woman since Jessica he'd really loved. When Dean had to call John in 'Home' and ask him for help. Or when (Y/n) went back to the motel room after getting kidnapped and just had to sit in their own head and had to truly process not only the death of their mother but now their father. The mixed feelings were amazing."

"You're a really big fan," I noted. She nodded.

"Gosh, if only real men were that open about their emotions."

"Real men," Dean asked.

"I mean, no offense," she replied. "How often do you cry like that?"

"Well, right now I'm crying on the inside," he muttered.

"Is that supposed to be funny?"

"Lady, this whole thing is funny."

"How am I supposed to know this is legit?"

"Oh, trust me," Dean mumbled. "We're legit."

"Well, I don't want some smart-ass article making fun of my boys," she snapped as she sat in her chair.

"Oh, never," I replied quickly. "We actually are big fans."

"You read the books?"

"Cover to cover," I promised.

"What's the year and model of the car?"

"1967 Chevy Impala," Dean smiled proudly.

"What's May 2nd?"

"That's my- uh... Sam's birthday," Sam replied.

"Sam's score on the LSAT?"

"Umm... 174," Sam said nervously.

"(Y/n)'s first hunt?"

"Vampire in Washington," I answered. "Dean was at the motel sick and (Y/n) almost chopped John's head off when he scared them."

"(Y/n)'s favorite memory that's not related to hunting?"

I smiled, "Helping Sam get ready for a date when he was a teenager because Sam didn't trust what Dean had told him."

"Dean's favorite song?"

"It's a tie," Dean replied. "Between Zep's 'Ramble On' and 'Traveling Riverside Blues.'"

She finally laughed and smiled again, "Okay, okay. What do you wanna know?"

"What's Carver Edlund's real name," Sam asked.

"Oh, no. I can't," she shook her head.

"We just wanna talk to him," Sam continued. "You know, get the 'Supernatural' story in his own words."

"He's very private," she shrugged. "Like Salinger."

"Please," Sam tried again. "Like I said, we're um... big fans."

Sam unbuttoned his shirt enough to show his anti-possession tattoo. Dean pulled his shirt to the side to do the same. I rolled my eyes and yanked the arm of my jacket down and pulled up the sleeve of my t-shirt. I don't wear as many layers as them and I had opted to put the tattoo on my upper arm because I thought it looked nicer.

"Awesome," the lady mumbled before standing up. "Y'know what?"

I looked away as she pulled her pants down.

"I got one too."

"Wow, you are a fan," I slapped Dean's arm. The lady fixed her clothing before grabbing a pen and paper.

"Okay," she said. "His name's Chuck Shurley-"

And I stopped listening after that. I knew that name... why did I know that name... oh... oh no. I'm gonna kill him. We're going to meet this man and I am going to end up killing him.

I followed Sam and Dean as they started walking out of the woman's house.

"Excuse me," she called as we reached the door. We looked back at her. "I'm sorry, but you look exactly like how I picture (Y/n) when I read the books."

I chuckled, "Thanks."

"He describes (Y/n) with so much detail," she smiled. "You could play them in a movie."

"Thank you," I waved as we walked out.

"'You could play them in a movie,'" Dean teased.

"I know who Chuck is," I said, ignoring him.

"What," he asked. I nodded. "How?"

I pointed to get into the car. I got in the back seat and Sam and Dean sat upfront. Dean started driving to the address the lady gave us before I started speaking.

"Okay, when you went to hell, Sam's not the only one who ran off," I explained. "I wasn't gone for four months... just two weeks. In those two weeks, I got involved in a single one-night stand. The name he gave me was Chuck Shurley."

"You screwed the man who wrote books about us," Dean asked, sounding angry.

"Do you think I knew he was writing books based on our lives?"

"He had to have known who you are," Sam added. "This isn't an accident. He has to get visions or something."

"Yeah, I know," I nodded. "He made money off of my name and then screwed me."

"Damn," Dean mumbled. "I missed a hell of a lot."

I rolled my eyes.

--time skip--

I knocked on the door loudly. Sam grabbed my arm, shaking his head at me. The door was opened and I smiled obnoxiously as Chuck. He was in a robe, his boxers, and an old white shirt. He looked tired and like he hadn't had a goodnight's sleep in days.

"Chuck Shurley," Dean asked.

"Chuck Shurley that wrote the Supernatural books," Sam added.

"Nice to meet you," I said. "This is Sam... Dean... and I'm (Y/n)... the ones you've written books about."

Chuck sighed and went to shut the door. I stepped in, stopping it with my foot.

"Listen, I appreciate the enthusiasm, I really do and I remember you," he motioned at me, awkwardly grinning before seeming to shake the memories out of his head. I almost slapped him right then. "But please... go get a life."

"You see," Dean followed me, helping to force our way inside. Sam made sure the door shut behind us. "We have a life... and you're selling books about it."

"Okay, this isn't funny," Chuck mumbled.

"You're right," I said. "We just wanna know how you're doing it?"

"I'm just a writer, I'm not doing anything."

"Then why do you know so much about demons and tulpas and changelings?"

"Is this some kind of 'Misery' thing? Ah, it is, isn't it? It's a 'Misery' thing!"

"No, it's not," I shook my head. "Believe me, we're not fans."

"What do you want then," he asked.

"I'm Sam... and that's Dean and (Y/n)," Sam tried again.

"Those are fictional characters," Chuck yelled. "They aren't real!"

Dean grabbed him and pulled him outside.

"Wait, wait-"

"We aren't kidnapping you, calm down," I rolled my eyes. Dean opened the hidden compartment in the impala's trunk.

"Are those real guns?"

"Yes," I nodded. "And real rock salt, real fake IDs."

Chuck let out a laugh at it, "Well, I gotta hand it to you guys. You really are my number-one fans. That... That's awesome. So, I-I think I've got some poster in the house."

"Chuck, stop," I rolled my eyes, grabbing his arm as he went to walk away.

"Please don't hurt me," he begged.

"How much do you know," Sam asked. "Do you know about the angels? Or Lilith breaking the seals?"

"How do you know about that?"

"Have you not been listening," I asked. "The real question is how do you?"

"Because I wrote it," he explained.

"You kept writing?"

"The books never came out because the publisher went bankrupt," he furrowed his eyebrows.

I stepped back, letting go of his arms.

"Okay, wait a minute," Chuck crossed his arms. "This is some kind of joke, right? Did Phil put you up to this?"

"Oh my god," I muttered, pinching the bridge of my nose. I grabbed his robe. "I'm sorry but I'm really tired. Nice to meet you. I'm (Y/n) Winchester, these are my brothers, Sam and Dean Winchester. You wrote and published books about us, probably knew who I was, and then you still slept with me."

He stared at me in shock.

"What," I asked.

"The last names were never in the books," he mumbled. "I never told anyone about that. I never even wrote that down."

"Then I guess we have a lot to talk about," I let go of his robe.

The three of us followed him inside.

--time skip--

"I got a visit from Cas," Dean explained as he walked in. "I've some important information."

After talking to Chuck and getting a draft of what was supposed to happen, we were all panicking. Dean told us to wait here. Lilith was going to come for Sam and we both thought it'd be harder if there was more than one of us here at all times.

Now, Dean was coming back from seeing Chuck.

"And that important information is...," Sam trailed off.

"He's a prophet of the lord," Dean said, smirking at me.

I shut my eyes, letting my head fall forward.

"Please say you're joking," I mumbled.

"Nope," Dean replied.

Sam looked over at me. He only started chuckling after his brother broke.

Dean was laughing his head off within seconds, "You screwed a prophet!"

"Shut up," I groaned. "I'm gonna kill him!"

"Archangel will kill you."

"I'll happily pay that price," I muttered. "I slept with a prophet."

"At least that means he didn't write himself to sleep with you," Sam tried to comfort me.

"Yeah, God just decided I was supposed to sleep with the guy publishing books about my life," I replied sarcastically. "That makes me feel so much better."

"Come on, it could be worst-"

"Sam, love you, but don't finish that sentence if you even kind of value your life," I muttered.

I was desperate for this conversation to just end.

--time skip--

After all was said and done, and Chuck accidentally helped us chase Lilith away for a while, we gave Chuck a lift back to his place.

I followed him up to his door, offering to look around and make sure that he's safe. He shook his head.

"I have an archangel protecting me," he reminded me. "Can't get any safer than that."

I nodded.

"I'm sorry, by the way," he said. "About us. I didn't recognize you until after... it all... and I didn't say anything because I didn't really know how to explain it. The whole event makes me feel all scummy."

"It's alright," I replied with a chuckle. "It's fine, I promise."

He offered me a nervous smile, "Y'know, in all of my visions, you're the most vivid thing."

With a grin, I leaned over and kissed his cheek gently. I stepped back and headed back toward the impala. I made sure to take note of his nervous and flustered face.

"See you around, Chuck!"

"You... You too," he called after me. I got in the backseat and got comfortable.

"So... screwing the prophet wasn't that bad," Dean asked.

I just rolled my eyes, waving through the window at Chuck as Dean pulled away from the curb. Leave it to a Winchester to end up in a situation like that.

--time skip (season 11)--

Sam and I followed Dean with our guns ready. Dean was following the amulet that he had owned for a long time without even knowing it could show us where God was.

Everyone had been infected by Amara only minutes ago but now it was okay and Dean's amulet was glowing.

"Holy shit," I mumbled, seeing who was walking over to us.

Chuck.

He was supposed to be dead. That's why Kevin's prophet powers had been activated.

"No way," Dean said.

"Hey," Chuck... or God said. "We need to talk."

Despite our understandable hesitation, Chuck reached forward, teleporting all of us back to the bunker. I stepped away from him, slightly overwhelmed.

"(Y/n)," Chuck walked over and tried to grab my arm. I instinctually slapped him. I was nothing but confusion and anger. "I deserved that. Just, please?"

I stepped away again.

From behind Chuck stepped Kevin's ghost. My breath caught in my throat. The poor boy had been through so much shit because of us.

Kevin told us about how we looked stressed and that we should listen to Chuck.

Then, Chuck waved his hand. Kevin turned into a ball of white and blue light before ascending beyond the bunker.

"Where'd he go," I asked.

"Heaven, where he deserves," Chuck promised. I nodded.

I listened to the rant about how Chuck had abandoned us all and how awful things were. Then, the conversation turned to the plan to stop Amara. The boys talked about needing Lucifer and Chuck got incredibly upset. In a fit, he went to leave. I stepped in front of him.

"No," I said bluntly. "Even if you want to avoid the subject of your estranged son, you can't just leave."

"(Y/n)-"

"Sam, Dean," I looked at them. "Give us a minute?"

They both nodded, glaring at Chuck on their way out. I tried to ignore the instincts that were telling me that Chuck was just selfish.

"(Y/n)," Chuck mumbled.

"Just answer my questions," I said. "Then we can discuss what to do with Amara without you storming away recklessly. Okay?"

He nodded.

"Have you been God the whole time," I asked.

He nodded.

"You wrote all of our stories?"

Another nod.

"Did you write that I was going to sleep with you?"

I felt manipulated and angry. I was desperate for an answer. I knew that this could've made me feel like dirt, but I needed to know.

"No," Chuck said. I clenched my jaw, ready to call him a liar. "I told you. I had been pretty much hands-off for a long time. Did I know who were? Absolutely. I'm sorry I lied to you about that. But I didn't plan anything between us. We weren't some divine plan."

I nodded, looking down.

"You know how Dean and Amara are connected," he asked. I nodded, looking back at him. "We're like them."

"And that's not a divine plan-"

"I'm not doing a good job explaining this," Chuck shook his head. "It feels like we're like them. Like there's this bond that just happened as soon as we met."

"You lied to me, for years," I said. "Saying we have some bond isn't gonna fix that."

"I know."

We both fell silent. Slowly, I started laughing. Chuck furrowed his eyebrows, "My only one-night stand... and it was God."

Chuck started laughing with me while I really processed what I had done.

I slowly stopped laughing.

I didn't notice until it was too late that Chuck had slowly gotten closer to me. As soon as his lips brushed mine, I pushed him back. Not hard, but enough to get him to step away.

"No," I mumbled. "Not that, no."

Chuck nodded, "Got it."

"Now," I sighed, "we need to actually plan to stop Amara, and if we need Luci-"

"We don't," he said bluntly. "We can do something else. We don't need him. Okay?"

I nodded. In my gut, I trusted him. Maybe that was me being an idiot but I did trust him. For now at least.

-------------------------------------

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[taki118]

Go Watch the Venture Brothers

So just heard the complete and utter Bullshit news that Adult Swim has cancelled one of (if not the best shows) they have the Venture Bros. This series is one of those shows that for WHATEVER reason never got to the level of fandom Rick and Morty has even though they’ve been at the genre parody game longer and in my opinion better. 

The series is about Rusty Venture former boy adventurer and failing super scientist who in an attempt to keep his head above water in debt goes around with his two boys Hank and Dean, and bodyguard Brock on misadventues while various legal archnemisis go after him, such as the Monarch. 

So if you never watched or never heard of this 7 season series let me give you a break down on why you should, 

1) Art Style & Animation

Venture bros is one of those rare Adult aimed animated series that that really truly tries to utilize their medium to the best of their abilities. Season 1 had like such a small budget and corners had to be cut so it can be a little hard to watch at times. 

But with each passing season they get a little better, a little more fluid, go just a little harder and it truly feels rewarding to watch. Like seeing an artist you follow online improve over the years. Like they COULD have stayed with the choppy and stiff animation from season 1 it fit right in with its fellow adult animated shows but it didn’t. They strove for quality to have something that matched the story they were telling.

2) The Writing 

Venture Bros has some of the tightest and consistently great writing of ANY serialized show I’ve seen, adult, animated or other wise. Wanna know why? Cause it’s all done by TWO people (save for like one ep each season where one other person is allowed to touch their baby). Yeah TWO people and they work their asses off every season to interject, humor, refrences, parody, plot and character development in equal measure. 

3) Character Development

Um yes in case you were wondering that’s right an adult animated show has CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT  that holds as the series goes on. Not to give spoilers but characters will go through changes in alignment, relationships will develop and change, some characters will go through negative arcs where they are straight up unbareable for a season before coming out the other side even better than they were before. There is no end of epsiode or even end of season reset. Characters, settings, and dynamics all change over the course of the show and it feels just so god damn good.

4) Story Development 

Just like the characters the story of the Venture Bros grows and changes each season. Things that are set up even as early as season one are paid off as the series goes on. Like not to be that bitch but you know how RIck and Morty teases an overarching plot ALL THE TIME but like will often just spit in the face of fans hoping for more than like one episode a season addressing it? Yeahhhhhhh that doesnt happen here, fans are consistently rewarded for putting the time in to rewatch and really think about what happened in the series. Characters that are seen in the background or are just referenced by other characters will be brought in to be recurring characters, things that start off as a small detail or gag will be given larger relevance and each time they do this you get that “OH I remember that from last season! So thats what it was!” The writers WANT you to rewatch, they WANT you to analyze and they WANT you to theorize, and they give you a show that gives back the time you put in.

5) Parody & Reference 

This series does a great thing with parody. They make real characters  who are just as enjoyable as the characters they parody, they make story lines that both poke fun at the absurdity of the media but shows the writers love for it. So often parody and references are just used to mock the thing but with Venture Bros you feel the love and care so when you know the thing being parodied you can laugh but feel good about laughing cause they are never laughing at a thing maybe you cared for in your youth but rather laughing with it.

And it’s never just one thing. When they parody a thing its often layered with other things to make it even more unique. Scooby-Doo is overlayed with famous criminals, Laura Croft is mixed Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman, GI Joe is given the look of the Village People and so on. They never go for the easy joke or reference. Hell theres an episode that starts with them reciting the lyrics to David Bowies Space Oddity for really no reason other than they could. They weave these things in naturally with their setting and characters so nothing feels out of place. Like if you dont catch a reference or parody you dont feel like “I think this isa reference to something?” like a LOT of things do not just adult animated shows. You arent taken out of the moment cause it all feels so natural. 

6) The Characters 

God damn these characters, I could go on for hours about these characters. From main to one off these are some of the most likeable characters you can find. I mean it when I say I can’t think of a single character I wish they had cut cause they are all so well created. Even the ones I hate i have fun hating cause they were made to be that way. I’ll be good though I’ll only talk about my absolute top faves.

- The Monarchs

You ever sit and wish villain couples could have functional  healthy relationships? Well look no further than Malcom Fitzcarraldo aka The Monarch and Dr. Shelia Girlfriend (yes that is her last name). The Monarch is a high strung impulsive saturday morning cartoon villain whos tendency to over react is only matched by his unspecified hatred of Dr. Venture. And Dr. G is his nonsense partner in crime who will cut a bitch if they don’t play by their admittedly weird rules. Both characters are great on their own but are better together. Though that doesnt mean they always get along. Like a real couple they have their ups and downs they fight, break up, make-up and grow stronger in their relationship with each season. 

- Shore Leave

Ok ok so I want you to imagine James Bond, mixed with GI Joe simmering in a cocktail of the most flamboyant gay men you have ever seen and you have one of my favorite gay characters/characters in general. Shore Leave is a member of OSI (the shows SHEILD/GI Joe parody organization) he’s loud, brash, flippant, sassy and highly competent at his job loving every second of getting to beat bad guys down within an inch of their life. I love seeing him play off the stoic Brock and the two have this great brotherly dynamic that’s never called into question. He also gets to have a very cute romance with Al the Alchemist (who is also great). I could talk about this man all day.

- Dr. Rusty Venture

They did such a good job with this man. He’s a self serving, sexist, perverted, whinny, self important asshole and yet you feel pity and genuine sympathy for him and want him to succeed. You can see how Dr. V was given a raw deal by his father who seemed to care more about his adventures than his sons well being and how this molded him into the bitter man he is today, but on the flip side you can see where he chose to use that as a crutch for his worst behaviors and impulses. Seeing him slowly grow and change and be an actual good father to his boys while all the while still be a giant dick is actually really great. 

- Dr. Byron Orpheus 

Ahhhhh Dr. Orpheus part Dr. Strange Parody part busybody stay at home dad, he’s just such a delight. Dr. Orpheus is a divorcee, with an unfulfilling job of maintaining order to the cosmos (which isnt as hard as one might think), and uses his magical ablities in ways most of us would (ie menial tasks and home chores). Overly dramatic and affectionate Dr. O is a delight whenever he appears, but he’s at his best around his daughter and old friends The Order of the Triad. 

Again I can go on but all these characters ranging from main to recurring are crafted with the utmost care for you to want to see them succeed or fail, to see them again even if you know it’ll never happen, and want them to cross paths with other characters. 

The Venture Bros is one of those series that I will ALWAYS recommend even to the pickiest of humor tastes. But if you don’t believe its as good as I said or don’t think the concept is to your tastes I’ll recommend a few eps that I think best show off the base idea of the series without giving much away. In terms of plot and spoilers, though somethings wont make a lot of sense. 

- S1 ep10 "Tag Sale – You're It!" - Dr. V is having a yard sale so of course all manner of costumed weirdos show up.  - S2 ep5 "Twenty Years to Midnight" - basically a fetch quest around the world to save the planet with daddy issues - S3 ep2 "The Doctor Is Sin" - Again daddy issues but with one of the best recurring characters and a great showcase of the series deeper emotional plots - S4 ep6 "Self-Medication" - Really embraces the parody as Rusty goes to a former boy adventurer support group.  Anyway the show is 7 seasons with 80 episodes, please go watch it. I will never forgive @adultswim​ for cancelling what was to be their final season. And in closing GO TEAM VENTURE!

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL

April 2021 Part 4 

it’s my birthday week! *raises a glass of pink milk* 

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Second Chance Ep 4 - oh noes my babies are all so sad! Teen angst for the win. Tropes included: crying in shower, a very significant hand hold, & striped shirts. (At this point over half the cast has been in stripes.) 

Love Machine Ep 1 - not gonna lie, I barely made it through the first half, this is a short run LOW budget experimental web series and it’s not good. Dropped.  

Lovely Writer Ep 9 - I like it when LW gets serious because there are fewer dumb sound effects, but oof Aey, poor baby. How many Aeys have I known over the years? Rejected, broken, angry, lonely, and lashing out. On a different note, I haven’t see the “sex drug made us do it” plot device since 1980s Johanna Lindsey. Props to that cocktail rearing its ugly head. (yeh yeh) ZOMBIE TROPE ALERT. (Is this the point where I remind the world at a-play doesn’t have to hurt? Well, it doesn’t! Toys, prep, and lube people. Sheesh.) Anygay, zombie trope is put safely back underground. Please don’t let it rise again? (I KNOW, I’ll stop now.) So this was a rough episode, especially the back end. (Okay now I’ll REALLY stop.)  Seriously tho, BL doesn’t do a massive coming out family drama scene often. I liked LW’s handling of this one. Hard to watch but compelling. 

Close Friend Ep 1 (OhmFluke) - very cute snapshot into a LTR featuring an overworked music producer and his student BF. That’s the chassis for this whole series, each one has to do with the song & is a portrayal of that song’s message. Essentially, the theme of this one was remembering to make time for your partner. I enjoyed that. OhmFluke gave us easy casual familiar affection and a kiss, but no BL tropes, just romance. 

Fish Upon The Sky Ep 3 - Pi is a total spazz & the ghost story bit was... well, it was something wasn’t it? Lots of tropes: fixing his clothes, wound tending, drag baby around, piggyback, head in lap, hand hold, and ending on a drunk kiss. I just noticed Pi uses guu/mueng with Mork, but Mork’s a year older. (So I have a new entry onto the linguistic brats list.)  So rude and presumptuous. Also I gotta say this, don’t wear watches when you’re working on a cadaver, mmky boys? 

Y-Destiny Ep 4 - look MaxNat have great chemistry, this ep had loads of great tropes (e.g. cheek kiss, rooftop, public claiming via phone), it’s not their fault I’m just not wild about these characters. I do like Nuea’s wanna-be idol wardrobe though. And Sun is sporting the red bag version of Tharn’s black bag that I wanted so bad in TT2. (I wonder if I can score a knock off when I’m over there?) Regardless, I basically grinned all the way through this installment, so that’s another thumbs up from me for Y-Destiny. Who knew I’d come around? Man would I love to see these two get their own series. 

Brothers Ep 12 - teacher/student exposed! But the power of boys on phones will overcome all. No KhunKaow for me, so of course I found this ep tragically disappointing. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

HIStory 4: Close To You (Taiwan) Ep 6 - MuRen is officially a yaoi manga character in the flesh. H4′s outright mockery/subversion of tropes “don’t touch him he’s mine,” + “touch my lip & think of kissing” makes the fact that other (way more damaging) tropes are being blithely utilized without critique almost - dare i say it? - insulting. YongJie is trash but I’m the one who feels like trash because I want to forgive him. How aptly abusive & dysfunctional we all are. I don’t know whether to applaud H4 or start drinking. (Maybe this is the show I should invent a cocktail for? Who am I kidding? This is totally a jello shots show.) 

Friend or Lover (Taiwan) Ep 2 - I thought this was only a microfilm but turns out it’s a web series. It’s cute. I’m enjoying it. 

My Lascivious Boss (Vietnam) Ep 3 - subs take a while to drop but it’s still better than average. I like a secret identity trope, I love a grumpy/sunshine pairing, and the side couple is great but this ep was slow. With only 6 total (I assume) they better get the main couple together next ep or the improved quality of this series will be sacrificed on the alter of pacing issues. 

Word of Honor (China) Ep 28-30 - slowed down to focus on bad guys (yawn...ooo Scorpion...yawn again). Then baby gets kidnapped, other baby goes crazy, and old friends turn up. We end on DOOM because mathematically this was an episode 11. All boxes checked.

Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding (Korea) Ep 3-4 - how is this show SO DAMN CUTE & weirdly wholesome at the same time? Another one of those: Will Korea resolve this satisfactorily in 4 short eps? But I seem to say that half way through every Korean BL. These days, I have complete faith. Warm fuzzies for everyone. 

Stand Alones

Color Rush movie is the same as the series. There is a stinger at the VERY end (untranslated) but which I’m assuming has something to do with the missing mother. Is this a possible indication of a 2nd season? Hopefully someone will eng sub the stinger and post it out into the universe. So yeah, Color Rush movie = To My Star style, sadly, not Wish You. That said, I did enjoy watching with different subs. The first version I watched was fan subbed, and they were better on English colloquialisms. Viki’s subs are better on Korean colloquialisms. 

Breaking News 

Bunch of new press on Thailand’s I Told the Sunset About You 2 AKA I Promised You the Moon. Here’s a master post on the subject with all the links you could ever want. It will start airing May 27th 8 pm (Thai time) on LINETV.

New Thai Bl Golden Blood got a teaser trailer. Stars familiar side dish Gun Napat (Techno from LBC) as a rich kid who needs a bodyguard. Yeah, it looks to be the Thai version of Where Your Eyes Linger which is FINE. I love me a bodyguard romance. DO EETTT Thailand. Trailer contains ALL the tropes: dry his hair, piggyback, cooking together, and more, plus good smooches. It looks GREAT. Also cheeper to make then KinPorsche and it might get funded due to of residual enthusiasm. Also GOOD TITLE. 

Close Friend got another teaser trailer this one for Talay & Yoon (no subs). 

Taiwan has a new BL coming out... eventually. Looks to be a new franchise like the HIStory series with different couple(s) each season. It’s the first Taiwanese BL from a major in-country network. The first installment is titled Be Loved in House: I Do (seriously Taiwan, could we talk about your titles?). It stars a familiar face, Aaron Lai from HIStory: My Hero. It’s a grumpy/tsundere boss/employee office-set BL with some forced proximity to push them together. (Nods to Japan.) No release date, but (unlike Thailand) Taiwan usually doesn’t make announcements without content & serious intent. 

Gossip 

Taiwanese BL NOVEL Miracle dropped a trailer, no subs or translation. According to YouTube comments it was supposed to be part of HIStory3 but MODC took on its slot. Still it’s kinda fun to see what might have been.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Some shows may be listed later than actual air date for International accessibility reasons.

Upcoming 2021 BL master post here.

Links to watch are provided when possible, ask in a comment if I missed something. 

[spin-attaxx]

4 8 19 25 29

4. Fav character/subject that’s a bitch to draw

I love Charn, some days I'm surprised I made him, but I won't lie, his elaborate design is why I don't draw him as often as I'd like. Every time I draw him, I question how his lapels should look, or how his eyes would look at varying angles. This isn't to mention the more robotic/mecha-influenced parts of him that I haven't shown off yet.

For subjects, probably action scenes; I admittedly don't draw them a lot, because when I do, I usually find myself dissatisfied for one reason or another. "This pose is too stiff" or "that effect looks bad" or "that background could have been better", etc.

The weapon art for Make a Good Mega Man Level is a bit of both; I try to keep Mega Man accurate to the official Capcom weapon art, but also give each one a distinct pose or angle. Lot of time goes into those, trying to get the lineart, colours etc. just right.

8. What’s an old project idea that you’ve lost interest in

OK this is a bit of a cheat since it's something that was once part of something I very much have not lost interest in, but it's something I still remember even almost 10 years on. Back when I first came up with what would become The Sorceress of the Stars, my overambitious 15 year old self envisioned a game like Sonic 3 & Knuckles, with three different playable characters with their own stories and their own supporting cast. These were a kooky old scientist, a robot he made that would gradually become more humanoid over its story, and his grumpy magic-using granddaughter. That last one was just a funny afterthought.

(Incidentally this is how Charn became what he is; he was supposed to embody each of the trio's main aspects.)

I made some old comics with the three; however, after some time I realised that I was struggling for a title, what I was planning was very much unfeasible for one person, and I cared very much about the magic granddaughter's story, the robot's less so, and the scientist's even less than that. So I decided to cut those two and focus entirely on Jessica instead. Perhaps the robot at least may get revived in the future, as part of TSOTS or their own thing.

19. Favorite inanimate objects to draw (food, nature, etc.)

This is a tricky question; I'm not sure I draw a lot of inanimate objects, and the ones I do tend to be stuff I don't think about much (or outright not like drawing). I guess maybe something like clothing and starry night skies count? Let's go with that.

25. Something your art has been compared to that you were NOT inspired by

Many people both online and IRL have told me my art reminds them of Dragon Ball Z. For the longest time, I didn't actually follow it; the most influence I drew from it was basing Jessica's boots on Android 18's. These days I have an appreciation for Toriyama's art (particularly his style around the Piccolo and Saiyan arcs), but it's still not something I consciously try to imitate.

29. Media you love, but doesn’t inspire you artistically

I think the most prominent example that comes to mind might be Seasons 1 and 2 of Star vs the Forces of Evil. I'm typically not a fan of overly-cartoony movement or expressions etc., but that first season somehow managed to make it work, and it was never dull to watch. It's honestly a crying shame that by the final season, the animation, character design, and backgrounds became so flat, stiff, dully coloured and lifeless (I swear every episode the characters do the same Family Guy-esque "bottom eyelids up, hands outstretched" pose).

[organic-guacamole]

episode 209 spoilers below

I'm so late today but here it is

I love EJ, he's finally learning to be happy. I'm so proud.

Ms Jenn = every boomer during zoom calls, like jeez yes we can hear you stop shouting at me.

LOVE THE SUBTLE JOKE ABOUT QUARANTINE "these dark times" "you mean spring break?"

ah yes, remember when we thought covid was just gonna give us a longer spring break? good times

SEBLOS

damn the passive aggressiveness from Carlos and the absolutely over it tone from seb✋

CASWELL COUSINS!!!!! THEY'RE THE BEST!!!!

we needed more if this kind of goofiness for the first part of season 2 that only such an iconic duo can provide.

old old movies-

is it even that old, or is Nini being a gen alpha rn-

i choose to imagine EJ being scared of the movie and hiding in Ashlyn's shoulder while she keeps a straight face and then EJ pretending to be tough afterwards

aww redlyn are soulmates.... yknow, if gingers had souls

(please ignore me)

y'all saw how EJ's face *lit up* when Gina logged on? how dare you tell me he doesn't like her

ofc she's no damsel in distress, she's Gina porter, she's amazing.

so do we think she'd be the type to just glare at suspicious people? or bark at them

do they not know that Rini broke up? or is Ms Jenn just wanting Nini to suffer through her heartbreak to make her a better actress....

speaking of, why is Nini in the call? she's not in the show anymore. Unless she is, even after the rose and the song got cut, which would be so unfair to all those that auditioned properly before she even came back but whatever, she's the main character I get it 🙄

big red is a hero honestly, Nini better thank him for changing the subject like that

I can't-

i won't work you over the break-

this woman would 100% work her kids 24/7 if it was legal and idk how to feel about it.

YES GINA USE THAT CHARM

QUEEN

FRENCH QUEEN

SHE LEARNT FROM THE BEST (antoine obvi)

smh the airport lady, eavesdropping on Gina's call.

The way she was so happy to answer EJ's call, "eej"

I love them your honour.

EJ WITH PAINTED NAILS YES PLEASE

great now we need to see Gina, Ashlyn and EJ having a complete spa day and EJ getting really into it and Gina and Ashlyn take pictures of him when he's laying down in a robe with a mask and cucumbers on his eyes.

finally we get to see Gina's side of portwell

the way she considered it as flirting, this is the sign she asked for in episode 6 come onnnnn

no is Asher/jack really doing tiktok dances in an airport-

Ricky is me. I am burrito.

oh Lynne, sweetie, I'm sorry but the blonde hair is not it

is that even the same lady or-

THE BEAN

THE CHICAGO BEAN

THE BIG OLD METAL BEAN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CITY 😭

jetlag is my go to excuse for anything... I haven't travelled in 2 years.

"welcome to the Lynne and Mike gossip show. where we talk about our depressed son that we both neglect in certain ways! And now a word from our sponsor, Nord VPN..."

SO MANY CANDLES

WHAT DEMON IS LYNNE TRYING TO SUMMON IN HIS ROOM-

is Nina becoming social media obsessed EJ from season 1? AND SHE LIED ABOUT HAVING SONGS TOO PLEASE WHY ARW THEY RECYCLING THE SAME PLOT-

Gina smiling at the picture of her family on Instagram makes me so happy, idek why.

EJ's nails are so pretty, we needed to see it more (unless he had it on for the rest of the episode and I just.... didn't notice🧍🏽‍♀️)

oh not the tiktok kid✋

yes ma'am end this strange mans whole tiktok career

sir take a hint and leave

GINA NO DONT SAY YOUR LAST NAME HE COULD BE A HUMAN TRAFFICKER

Ricky, walking in style✨

weird kid, ok then Lynne, can't you see he's this close to the edge?

not all your fault baby Ricky, Nini sucks a bit more

RICKY YOU DIDN'T COME DOWN HARD ON THE SONG-

YOU ASKED WHAT IT WAS ABOUT AND SHE SHUT YOU DOWN-

PLEASE DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF

ok but the deleting comment thing was very bad

still don't know if I like Jack honestly

hmmm so Nini's calling herself Nini instead of Nina in her little egg seat, while trying to write a song without inspiration.... Nini, honey, Ricky was your muse, he inspired you to write all those songs, even if it wasn't good for the relationship.

that doesn't mean you gotta get back with him, or that you can't write a song that not about him butttt it'll take some time

the rainbow sticker in her box and her rainbow shirt-

anyways wbk she's not totally straight

Jack are you a criminal?

quick, Gina, check his ankle for a tracker

THE YES AND PRACTICE STRIKES AGAIN

the way Gina wasn't into it in episode 6 but she's used the technique twice now

stole her grandma's Pomeranian-

Jack where the hell did you pull that out from-

the fake crying killed me, that looks like so much fun though

anyone wanna raid a first class lounge with me?

wait so is jack not gonna go in with her?

wouldn't he go in too? help look for the credit card? SO CONFUSED

the first class lounge guy was so into the drama though, watch his face when they start arguing 😭

sorry to break this to you Kourtney, but you haven't even blocked the second act yet soooo...

take that as you will

I love how all of them are totally dissing the dance off

that's the most realistic part of this show tbh

shouldn't Nini have asked how she knew....since the start? why is the fact that her best friend has knowledge of a North high secret now dawning on her...

Howie is sweet honestly, at least he's trying to help. but I stand with Kourtney, don't take him back just because he sang an amazing song, and is giving you a heads up on what's gonna happen...

KOURTNEY IS ME TRYING TO LEAVE AN ONLINE CLASS

I hate school

ooo Nini's writing a song about bad internet connection 🤩🤩🤩

I never lie, except when I do-

son that is the creepiest thing you could say to a stranger that you've been "helping"

2 truths and a lie👀

he's an Ariana fan 100%

called it.

OLDER BROTHER-

WHAT-

free spirit? damn so brother porter was in that horse movie

so has she been kissed or not?????????

I feel like she's moved more than 15 times though so possibly

but then if she's moved so much, and before east high she never opened up to anyone, she's never been kissed then?? damn

same though Gina so let's be besties please

heartbreak president is a great song title idea, give Nini a call rn

but wait

is the no strings attached feeling thing about her telling Ricky she liked him? she thought she was moving away so she thought it'd be no strings attached???

guys I think I figured it out insert the "I've connected two dots" meme

THE DUKE SWEATSHIRT

IS THAT YOUR BOYFRIEND'S

OMG I LOVE I LOVE

NOT THAT I KNOW OF???

ma'am did you just kill me

yes you did

Lynne and Ricky have such a weird relationship

YES IT DID SUCK

TODD SUCKS

LYNNE SUCKS

yeah I get that you wanted Ricky to like Todd BUT THAT WASN'T THE TIME

right so we already know that Ricky was so desperate to keep Nini cuz he didn't want to be like his parents, and now Lynne's talking about this-

Richard needs a long hug

yes Lynne, it is your fault. thank you for finally admitting it.

YES DYE YOUR HAIR

BLOND HIGHLIGHTS RICKY WILL RISE AGAIN

"sometimes the best, last thing you can do for someone you love, is let them go."

gotta admit I teared up at that point

not me thinking big red was calling ms Jenn cupcake for a hot second-

Carlos please omg, you're at the "beach" and they're leaving for the pool?

also, why not just do the call from the hotel room please omg

"don't ask me"

"Carlos"

OMG WHAT HAPPENED

big red wants the tea

O M G

SEB IS JEALOUS

JEALOUS SEBBY IS MY FAVOURITE THING IDC

I'm surprised ms Jenn knew how to give Nini permission to screenshare tbh

So lily's been stalking the East high kids and spending time editing this video while she's supposedly in an immersion trip.... right

EJ and Ashlyn's picture is so chaotic, what even is happening there

"slacking off" bestie its spring break, obviously they're confident enough that they'll get it done in time so why not focus on your own musical.

jealous seb = sassy seb

please what if those guys Carlos is posing with are his cousins or something and that's why he's so confused about Seb

6 YEAR OLD EJ I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM

Nini saying she's obsessed with her ex, that's not weird at all 👍

I can just tell Matt had a blast harassing Julia with those puppets.

Jack please dont be like that, "yet"

chances are you'll never see eachother again ��

(honestly sometimes I really miss those friends I made on trips and stuff when we'd spend the day or week together, only to never see them again....those were the good days though)

Ashlyn and Nini should write more songs..... something better than this one at least

Nini: "im good"

cue the Tia Mowry (please I can't spell) crying gif

oh I forgot Ricky was in the show for a hot second

1. where did Gina get to film this without people being around

2. did she just... randomly change her clothes???

ok but the transition between Carlos and EJ

*chefs kiss*

now everyone shut up, EJ's singing

oh i think I'm pregnant

HIS MUSCLES

YES KOURTNEY

I love how big red and Kourtney went from being "the best friends™" to the couple in season 1, to kinda close themselves and having their own plots

sebby makes me so happy

props to biggies editing skills honestly

PORTWELL BEING SIDE TO SIDE I CANT

AND SEBLOS OMG

big red lives for the drama

"wow" so true Ricky

no he is not cute, stop it

"holding" ok that's kinda cute

yeah EJ's a lucky guy😌

jokes aside, it's not that hard to exchange numbers-

keep in touch if you want

ok I really like Jack now

if he comes back in season 3, maybe have him be LGBTQ+ ?

like the only out characters they have rn are Seb and Carlos and they're like the sterotypes, yk?

I'd love to see jack kinda break the mold

Ricky's breaking my heart

that song just hurts

the only thing

now I don't hate Lynne????????

HOW DARE THEY WRITE IN A PROPER REDEMPTION ARC FOR HER

UGH IM SUPPOSED TO HATE HER FOREVER

I mean I don't live her now but she's good

but honestly

"mom can I show you something"

IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL

THE PICTURE AND EVERYTHING OMG

I'm sobbing please help

Gina saying she's just waiting for the right guy and then EJ coming to the airport to pick her up late at night without her asking, offering to bring her back in the morning so she won't have to Uber, bringing her a granola bar (WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT SHE FORGOT TO PACK) and without expecting anything in return???

ms ma'am you've got a keeper right there

her smile at the end was so heartwarming I really can't.

this episode was great.

it felt really short but I liked it, great character development for Ricky, Lynne and Gina.

Cant wait for next episode to see more of EJ being the ideal boyfriend /hj

[toujoursmiraculous]

Thoughts and Reaction to ROCKETEAR!

It's a long post, but when are these ever really short? xD Seeing Carapace first made me so excited. I've been sad we haven't had much of him in the show. And then I saw that it seemed like Ladynoir was doing pretty good as they only had Carapace helping them this time. More S2 & S3 like. So I was like cool, cool, this is great. But what the heck scientist WHY ARE YOU BRINGING TYRANNOSAURUS REX'S BACK! Obviously she's going to be something big later on, she's too nicely animated not to be back. Not to mention Bob Roth's plans. Anyone else both intrigued but also scared at what that could do later? Big upcoming plot point, I think.

I screamed awwww because this is everything. I've wanted a LB/Carapace and Marinette/Nino friendship bond in this show since season 1. This scene made me incredibly happy! I'm a huge Nino fan, for those that don't know, so you can imagine how much I love this episode. Even though sad Nino.

"Alya, everyone has to believe that you will never use the Miraculous again!" End of episode: So anyway... So what I'm seeing here is, Alya's not fond of the idea of being just a spy, not being in on the action. Even though it's Ladybug's plan. Chat Noir isn't fond of what's going on right now either, where he thinks what's going on is all Ladybug's plans. Alya makes the decision to not do what Ladybug wants and tells Nino she's still Rena Rouge. So what's Chat Noir going to do to go against her? Because that's coming up on the horizon. Despite everything being easier for Marinette since everything's not just on her shoulders now, she's still been unable to play video games with her dad, and we know how much she loves doing that. :c That's really sad she doesn't even have time for her family anymore. DJWifi over here being all adorable. "You don't love me anymore!" Me: *Chat Blanc flashbacks* Alya suggests her new content could be Chat Noir edits and Marinette's like YES DO THOSE. Then those edits helped push Nino into thinking she was into Chat. Big oops. Not gonna lie, the rewind freaked me out for a moment. Last time I saw that was Chat Blanc so I thought something big was up. But nope, it's just like that scene in Puppeteer 2. Ugh poor Nino! He knows something's bothering Alya, but she won't say what it is and her behavior's too off from how she normally is. Poor guy. x.x Grumpy Nino that Carapace doesn't get attention and then they wrote his girlfriend with Chat Noir. I remember when Alya was grumpy for a bit about Rena Rouge not getting a party to celebrate her. Movie Ladybug telling Movie Chat Noir that he's better with Movie Rena Rouge. Is this a reference to the episode in Avatar, The Ember Island Players? Getting strong vibes when Play Aang and Play Katara were like, we're just friends nothing more and it's great! Play Katara was extremely into Play Zuko. I can see why Ladybug dismissed the movie (or was it the previous one since it's been awhile? Maybe?) because Rena Rouge and Chat Noir???? The writers (of the movie) just wanted to be different because everyone can see Ladynoir, unless they're blind. Alya and Nino are Andre's favorite couple. YES THANK YOU. I mean they're not my favorite because Love Square. BUT they're my second favorite next to them. Those kids are super adorable but definitely that kid playing Chat wasn't doing Nino any favors. First picture Alya shows. Chat with a heart tail. Yeah that's not doing her any favors lol. Nino: UGH CHAT NOIR'S COMING IN BETWEEN ME AND MY GIRLFRIEND. I KNOW, I'LL CALL MY BEST FRIEND TO VENT TO ABOUT IT. Best Friend Chat Noir: Best Friend Chat Noir: Welp maybe I should see what's up. Maybe I went a little to hard on the cat charm and she's fallen in love with me. Me: Oh oof here we go. Also can I ask, if anyone knows, who animated this episode? The fluidity is great and it looks really pretty. But it doesn't quite look like SAMG's work either. Whoever did it, I love it. S2 Chat Noir: You're not replacing me with a turtle, are you? :c S4 Nino: Who would want a reckless turtle as a partner? BOYS STOP. But yeah this whole scene had me laughing so hard XD Very dramatic and I love it. Nino's hilarious even when he's worried and sad! I would've absolutely loved to have heard this in English with the old English voice of Nino, but the new one worries me on whether or not he'll do a good job sounding like Nino and less high-pitched and whiny. :/ New York Nino was great but S4 Nino....x.x THE TRANSITION BETWEEN HIS INNER MONOLOGUE AND SPEAKING REGULARLY AGAIN 😂😂😂😂 Brilliant! It doesn't really feel like Miraculous Ladybug this episode, and I love it. Not that I don't love the show as usual but wow this is great. Okay, I want to point out that Chat Noir

probably was more worried about it than he would've been otherwise because of what happened with Marinette in Weredad. It probably made him more cautious about this sort of thing.

LOL Chat's sulking because Alya's laughing at the idea of being interested in him. 😂😂 I know that's a blow to one's ego and all, and he's dealt with this kind of thing a lot so I do feel bad for him, but that is his best friend's girlfriend and he definitely doesn't want her to like him. Alya: With him it's not just ❤️it's *makes massive hand gesture indicating she loves him deeply* SO SO SO CUTE OKAY ALL THIS DJWIFI 😭 Alya: And I don't even know your secret identity! I would never fall in love with someone I don't know. Chat Noir, literally fell in love with Ladybug, whose identity he doesn't know. Well Alya, I wonder if you saying that matters for later somehow.... o.O Nino running away crying is honestly one of the things that hurts me most in the entire show. Ugh. Adrien over here being all, I'm having a good day. I'm happy and smiling and it's great. And then it wasn't. Adrien, if Nino let him and didn't interrupt, would've told him about how Alya really doesn't love Chat Noir, and that would've seriously led up to his identity being exposed since Nino was watching and filmed them. o.o Did you notice how he was going to tell him about it? S4, the basement is where it's at. Adrien: Uhh, when did you arrange all this? Nino: *pounds fist on desk* I ASK THE QUESTIONS! 😂 So like. Why is Nino interrogating Adrien when he's after Chat Noir? He doesn't know they're the same person. XD He's looking at him like Adrien has info he's keeping or something omg.

Also again this animation is so nice. Adrien, feeling uncomfortable and so turns the music off. Nino, wanting his dramatic music on while he interrogates Adrien, turns it back on. Adrien, feeling even more irritated and uncomfortable, wants the music OFF and turns it off. Nino, turns the music back on. This may be a reference to something, I don't know, but lolol it's so funny. This episode is both super hilarious and super angsty! Honestly they've done such a good job in my opinion. Nino: I'm talking about something that I shouldn't tell you! ...but I'm going to tell you anyway! Alya's Rena Rouge and I'm Carapace! Okay but the way Adrien went from shock to utter anger, knocked his chair back and grabbed Nino's shoulders like "Tell me the truth. You two know about each other?" Aw man, my poor sunshine boy. A lot of the stuff bothering Adrien is all circumstantial, none of it is to purposefully keep him in the dark. And yet from his perspective, that's how it looks. "I thought secret identities must be protected at all times! If that was the truth, you would never tell me this!" Alright so three things. If he's referring to him saying that Nino and Alya know about each other, that was situational and important info for him to know now that this is out. It wasn't important to know before this. The time it happened was dire and was really no time to get around it. If he's talking about Nino telling him the secrets, well yeah that's not supposed to happen and Nino broke that trust. But also, I get the feeling pretty strongly at this point Adrien's going to be breaking some rules too and one of which is he's going to tell Nino who he is. Adrien's being too emotional in this scene to not be involved in it all, I'm wondering if that's going to be questioned later by Nino. He's acting like he knows too much to be a random viewer of the heroes like the rest of Paris. Also Adrien's best friend just totally dissed Chat Noir and went off about how he throws himself at Ladybug whenever he sees her with roses and love confessions. 😂😂😂 This is just too funny! "But he's always rejected because Ladybug finds him annoying! And she's completely right!" Omg Nino, that's not the reason anymore, shush! "And then Rena Rouge appears and he goes *tickles under Adrien's chin* hey pretty lady! You look elegant and you have great perfume." OMG does Chat Noir actually say and do stuff like that to Rena Rouge or is he just exaggerating here XD "If I could I would shut his mouth forever!" Yeah Nino, say what you really think about your best friend in the entire world. Yikes poor Adrien though. I never imagined he'd hear all these bad things about himself from his best friend directly like that. :/ That's a major misunderstanding of him. Which kind of pushes me more towards the "he's going to tell Nino" theory. Sad Adrien transformation DDDX Alya: *explained everything about why Chat Noir went over to her house in the middle of the night* Marinette *facepalm* Ugh that Chat Noir... Well at least there will be no misunderstandings there! xD "Chat Noir, you stole Alya from me! I will steal your life from you." Good lord man calm down. You can't just kill a man! Fanon: Chat Noir gets attacked by a guy over Marinette. Canon: Chat Noir gets attacked by a guy over Alya. Time to go back to the basement! lol Nino's music's still playing xD And the video is left with it paused on Chat Noir hugging Alya. Marinette looked a bit sad, but it was probably more about the situation being a mess rather than being sad he'd hug her. Meanwhile, Chat Noir's fighting Nino and would rather get beaten up by him than fight. x.x "I can't believe that I doubted you." "I can't believe I chose to do anything but be with you!" She wiped away akumatized Nino's tear just like how Ladybug wiped away akumatized Chat Noir's. ALL THE PARALLELS 😭😭😭 But that hug is so sweet!! Nino broke off the akumatization just like Alya did :o Dang, I wonder if that means something later too. "Love and secrets do not go well together, Ladybug. And I'm sure you have a lot of

them!" Secrets = from Chat Noir. Love = for Chat Noir. Yeah even Shadow Moth knows at this point. xP Thanks for that foreshadowing. Nino's charm is my favorite charm so far! It's my favorite shade of blue. Chat Noir: Everybody has doubts sometimes...even me." Ladybug: Is everything okay, Chat Noir? Chat: Oh yes...pound it!

So um. The placemet of Adrien's poster in between Chat Noir, Ladybug, and just with this entire situation feels very strange. Very intentional. But no clue exactly what that could mean..... Nino and Alya are happy over there watching those two, like they're waiting for them to figure things out or something. But really, Adrien should've talked to Ladybug when he could still do so calmly and be reasonable. I doubt that's going to be the case later on. And honestly Ladybug doesn't even know what's going on. Every episode we've seen really either has them working together or she's unable to be Ladybug when he's unable to be Chat Noir most of the time. I've said it before but these two really need to communicate. Nino and Alya are like a less adorably romantic version of what they'd be. "But they're a couple and they know their secret identities, so why does that rule exist for us but they can know?" Very simple. Because they were temporary holders and the Miraculous they had, Hawk Moth hasn't made it his life's mission to obtain, unlike them, who are permanent holders and Hawk Moth's been after them fiercely to make a Wish that could destroy everything. But. The fact he's asking this, and Marinette's Chat Blanc nightmare, really points in the direction that he's going to eventually find out that while she's thought about telling him all along, Chat Blanc's kept her from doing so.

Okay, so while it looks like he's staring up at the moon, if you notice, it really is just one of the pink bubbles.

Now, they could be making it seem like it's the moon though to give it a double meaning. But poor Kitty, he's feeling so awful right now over in that dark corner Dx Nino felt bad for only two episodes? and it got resolved, so hopefully this all won't last too much longer for him! Marinette had a few shaky episodes so hopefully he'll have a few before it gets resolved. But somehow I think that may be wishful thinking. This episode was so amazing, honestly. Wonderful writing, made me laugh a lot, aw a lot, and hurt a lot. It focused on the core 4 characters which I've wanted more of for a long time. The animation was beautiful. And it just felt so different in such a good way. Chat Noir's having a hard time right now, and I know there's a lot of anger and hate about it going around. But please, think of this as him hitting a rough spot in the road to a much better and brighter future. He's going to end up okay, he'll understand it all someday. And that day's honestly not that far for him if you think about it.

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh Season Zero: The Yo-Yo Crimes of Jounouchi Pt 1

It’s been a while since I visited the many times Yugi should have gone to jail, AKA season Zero, and I’m excited to visit it again.

If you just got here, this is Season Zero, which is very different vibe and a different direction plotwise than the other seasons and you can read the season zero recaps from the start in chrono order here: https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yuugi%20muto/chrono

So be warned, this is a 90′s anime, and it will do 90′s anime things, and I expect y’all reading this aren’t like 12.

Like I said in an earlier post, I wrote this out fully when I was going through the symptoms from my second dose--which PS, is worth it--but those symptoms knocked me out for 10 days. I was kind of a space cadet, and yo, I made some mistakes. Including writing this post out in full and then not clicking “save” on this post and then not realizing I had done that until several days later.

So long story short, I don’t remember what I originally wrote here, but lets all assume it was weird, and didn’t make sense and wasn’t funny. We’ll just assume this was for the best that it was deleted forever.

So this episode is about 2 things: Yo-yos and Jounouchi. Both get used as a tool for violence, and both need to get just a little bit cursed by Yugi to scale it the hell back. So, understandably, we start off this episode with Jounouchi, who has eagerly identified with this off brand yo-yo he apparently got out of a dumpster for being just a huge ass defect.

(more Yo-Yo crimes under the cut)

I see you dodging copyright infringement, Yugioh. Eireboy.

Also whenever I read “Eireboy” I do it in my mind in the same pacing and vocal tones that Pegasus uses to say “Kaiba boy.” Something about it’s conjunction to Yugioh, I see anything with “boy” at the end of it, and it’s voiced by a weird guy with one eye.

So I wrote these caps under the influence of my second dose, just assuming y’all understand the life I lived, but I realized writing this episode...traveling bands of yo-yo performers that go to your school and shill yo-yos with yo-yo shows in the hopes that it will get you so obsessed with yo-yos that you will not join a gang and do drugs and have sex may be just an American thing.

So when I saw a yo-yo episode I was like “Tight! Clearly, the yo-yo clowns have come to town!” and I assumed everyone in this class would be draped in yo-yos, because I just assumed that at some point at School you will get MAD OBSESSED with yo-yos for about 2 weeks.

But in this episode, everyone was like “Jounouchi, why are you playing with a random yo-yo?” and it didn’t occur to me until typing this out just now: only Jounouchi is doing this. He did this unprompted, without the encouragement of a bunch of middle aged performers doing tricks to techno music.

So instead, I have to think of Jounouchi as Ralphie in this scenario, and he just got a official Red Ryder, carbine action, 200-shot, range model air rifle, with a compass in the stock and this thing that tells time for Christmas, but he’s gonna shoot his eye out.

Because yo-yos in this episode are basically guns.

...Kind of like a duel deck was also just a gun...

...or the wands in Harry Potter...

...which honestly...I’ve probably said this before but where I’m from, we just use straight up guns in these elaborate analogies because we freakin have to make the point crystal clear. The moment Ralphie finally got his hands on a bb-gun, he very nearly shot his eye out and broke his glasses. And that scene will haunt me until my dying day...

...but fine, we can use yo-yos, I guess it works, although to me, yo-yo’s are just teachers hoping you’ll become such a dork that no gang will accept you (and then in this universe, it does the opposite? So freakin weird).

The beginning of this episode is Jounouchi trying do his best to impress with his skills, but in actuality, getting very close to clubbing Anzu with a yo-yo. And, while Anzu is the strongest person in Yugioh in the later seasons, I feel like Season Zero Anzu is another level. It’s a serious tempt of fate that Jounouchi is doing, so Honda wisely cuts him off from doing any more of that so she won’t end up strangling yet another person in broad daylight in the middle of school.

Remember your yo-yo safety, children.

Straight up, Honda’s version of yo-yo safety is to just Never Use a Yo-Yo and that’s the most gun safety thing ever that they’ve slipped into this Yugioh Episode. I almost expected Yuugi to pull a “well, actually, I use a hunting yo-yo to get enough venison to feed my family.” But youknow, he lives in a city, so while Yugioh is pretty weird and Yuugi has to worry about a lot of things--he doesn’t have to worry about that.

This is actually foreshadowing, which I only realized in hind sight, mostly because I just can’t associate a Yo-yo with crime. Joey knowing how to use a yo-yo was foreshadowing that he was absolutely part of this gang in a past life.

Yeah that one went completely over my head the first time and the second time and it really wasn’t until just now that I finally caught it. Hoo boy, sometimes I wonder why y’all let me analyze this show.

Jounouchi decides to confront the yo-yo bandits and everyone else is like “Silly Jounouchi, he’s not gonna do that. That would be stupid.” And...in S0, they don’t know him well enough yet to know that he really is that much of a well meaning dumbass.

I think a S1-5 Yugi would have been sprinting out the door to keep Joey from killing himself (again), but Season Zero Yuugi had hope that Jounouchi would just naturally tucker out and fall asleep or something.

And he was so wrong.

Anzu’s “New Tricks” line was from the dub itself and man that’s a good line. I love Anzu’s sass in Zero.

So, Honda decides to help them find Jounouchi so all of them together could give Jounouchi an intervention for skipping school. This is the same Honda that once skipped school to babysit a tomagachi and said it was because of “Maternity leave,” but don’t worry about the hypocrisy, because from this episode we learned that Jounouchi needs a very short leash.

So this episode is a great Jounouchi episode to explain stuff that still hasn’t been explained in 5 seasons of Yugioh. In S1-5, we don’t get much about his home life other than his Mom left and his Sister lives far away and is like sickly as hell. We know nothing else. But this is the episode where we finally get to find out why Yuugi and his Grandfather decided to basically adopt him from S1 onward.

Yugioh is tackling some pretty heavy territory, but I respect the show for not trying to magically change Jounouchi’s parents like they did to Dartz. Instead, the crew decide to reach out and try to find their friend who clearly didn’t go home last night (and won’t be going back for a while), by checking every alleyway in Domino.

Fun fact Yuugi drops this episode, Domino is one of the biggest cities on Earth. This makes the Battle City Tournament even more crazy when you realize Kaiba shut down several blocks but, it also makes a tiny bit more sense how we have so many Millennium items in one place. (Yet...it still doesn’t explain Bakura and Joey’s accent.) And, I guess if your city is just extra large, you get an extra large warehouse district, too.

Speaking of, they eventually find Jounouchi at his new (but also old) crime antics mugging some random stranger next to this Game store that I just realized was cropped so it looks like it says “GANG.”

Say hello to our crime clown. He’s sort of like a discount joker, and that beanie is...man it is green.

I forget this green exists sometimes, but Season Zero has it as one of their prime colors. Good ol’ Retro Kaiba green.

I’m a little tempted to swatch Season Zero a bit and figure out their full color scheme--it’s really saturated, which is interesting when you compare it to the later seasons which are a lot more muted since...the 00′s were like that, they greyed a lot of colors out. But I’ll do it later if I do, maybe another post for another day.

Jounouchi and Honda, before they moved to the school with Yuugi in it, used to go to the same school and up until now I just assumed they were close friends. But apparently they were a lot more distant than that. I’m sure they met up several times as Jounouchi destroyed stuff and Honda came along in his volunteer janitor outfit to put the stuff the hell back, and maybe that’s how they got to know eachother better?

But basically, Jounouchi was the freakin worst, and Jounouchi’s best friend was Hirotani--this 45 year old 15 year old with the blue pony and turquoise fade--and Honda has SO MUCH hot goss to say about it.

I really get the gist that Honda may not have liked anyone else at his old school, like at all. Like maybe Honda likes cleaning up trash so much because his school was just trash top to bottom.

As is tradition, Yuugi got his tar beat in by Hirotani. Another concussion to add to his list of issues to tell his future therapist that lives in that puzzle he wears around his neck.

I still expect him to do a double cross, but it seems they wanted to keep it a relatable and more realistic fall-out, where Jounouchi has just bounced on them without even a goodbye. He and his Dad had a bad fight, and Jounouchi was like “well so long to all of this and everyone that has anything to do with it.”

In later seasons, Joey is the one trying to save other people. He’s saving his Sister, he’s saving Mai, he’s saving Yugi, but in this season Jounouchi’s friends had to save Jounouchi from himself a few times now.

I like this depth to his character, I’ll be honest. I can understand why S1-5 don’t touch on it, and I don’t think it’s because they didn’t want to have an abusive Dad storyline, because they did that several times over with Seto Kaiba (man the Dad situation in Yugioh is DIRE.) Instead they probably just felt like Season Zero already did it, so why do it again?

It’s just a shame that it wasn’t talked about in the other seasons. Joey makes a lot more sense to me now because we get to see why Jounouchi is so hard set on saving people. S4 Mai Valentine, who ditched everyone and joined a gang? That’s basically a Joey move, and that was why Joey Wheeler was all over that.

Really would have added a lot to that particular arc if the show...actually talked about Joey’s history at all rather than assume I would have watched something that was never released in the States. Instead...it just looked a lot like he had only romantic motivations, which may not have been what they were going for.

Speaking of romantic, check out this sunset. Like the sun is exploding for some reason--just a wild sunset you only see for a still frame before a commercial break.

As Joey, youknow, takes on an entire rival gang single-handedly.

Hey guys, I lived near a pretty big city most of my life and I have been on a roof...once. Just the one time when I was doing an internship in SF with a painter and we needed to take a reference photo of his painting for a gallery (and it was hella sketch, and we weren’t exactly allowed up there). Who are all these people giving teens Roof Access? It’s so hard to get! Even if you live in an apartment of a tall building, I can count on zero of my fingers the amount of times I was allowed on that roof. But TV shows and movies--they freakin love roof gardens and roof hangouts and roof fights.

Am I missing out?? How did y’all get on the ROOF? I know I’m on S5 of Yugioh now and I have seen a lot of roof stuff, but like...is this normal for everyone else? I know there’s schools that have roof sport--that’s common in the city everywhere--but that’s like...specialized roofs with 30 ft chainlink fencing and really good supports to your body doesn’t fall straight through it when you jump too much. The hell is using their normal ass roof?

This gang should have their legs swinging halfway into the floor below them, is all I’m saying, if my roof couldn’t handle our solar heating, then a normal ass roof cannot support a gang fight.

But it does look really, really cool.

Anyway, Anzu does some offscreen snooping and finds out where the crime hangs out, and suggests that we step right into crime zone and just yank Jounouchi out of there. Which is something you would only do and say if you were Anzu and cannot fear death.

If it were Jay’s it would be with an ‘s. That’s how you do a plural Jay. But it’s the 90′s, so we put a “z” on the end of everything that should have been an “s” and that’s how you get the...

I mean, thank you, dubbers, for not saying “Jizz” but for reals...that be Jizz.

Please don’t flag me, Tumblr. (which, PS, I think they turned off the flagbot, Tumblr hasn’t flagged me in forever and I’m so thankful. Mods are asleep, we can talk about anime again)

So even though Honda decided that he was fed up with Jounouchi and didn’t want to save his ass, he decided to give it another go but complete with some new sash. He also did this without telling any of the others, who just kinda spectated him for a little while.

Honestly, if they weren’t laughing at him, I wouldn’t have known that this sash was any weirder than any of his other sashes. I don’t know really know what a school uniform should look like. It’s a shame, I feel like this series has a lot of jokes and puns probably soaring right over my head.

A little bit embarrased he was caught being vulnerable, Honda decides to give us a little more context to why he ever decided to give Jounouchi the time of day in the first place.

They had PE class once, and Honda apparently loves the hell out of PE. Jounouchi ran really fast in a straight line that one time, and that is why he’s trustworthy friend material. He just needs to stop joining gangs, and he’ll be solid.

I have no idea if the fandub put that in there or if that was native to the show, but Miho legit stans Honda/Jounouchi and acts as if she’s off to write some fanfiction about it. Honestly if she did, it would make her so much more interesting of a character.

And so, until next time, we shall have to wait and see exactly what Yami Yuugi is going to do with a freakin Yo-yo and I’m sure it’s all sorts of real effed up. Excited to get there, honestly. A shame it had to happen on the part that isn’t dubbed yet, but I’ve done these subbed before, it’ll be fine!

[kaypeace21]

The theme with “time” this season makes me think of the phrase, “wanting to turn back the clock.” And I then think of Will never wanting to grow up and wanting to go back to the old days of playing dnd in Mike’s basement.

And then I think of Will’s (speculated) reality altering bending powers. So could there be a possibility that Will may use those powers to “turn back the clock”?? Maybe rewrite how things happened? Maybe it would be after Mike’s “death” like you speculated earlier. Since he thinks Mike is “dead” he wants to go back, and that’s what he does accidentally.

ALSO, Hopper tells joyce that he was trying to runaway from his "past" trauma with sara- before he says that line in the letter about wanting to turn back the clock and then saying it's not possible to do so . (And that life life hurts you but eventually you get out of that cave and life goes on ). Similar to Will he wants to turn back the clock to better times, but a part of him isn't ready to accept his entire past/ the tra*uma that comes with that- in order to move on and heal for the future .

Like robin said about back to the future "he's stuck in the past .But he needs to get back to his time which is the future!"

HOWEVER- I DON’T THINK THERE’S ANY REAL TIME TRAVEL!!!!

I’ve mentioned  my time-theory many many many times- in relation to my DID theory.  even if my did theory is completely wrong (aka Will has powers so his alters/split personalities/innerworlds come to life)- 

We also see how memories are explored in a supernatural way in st - it’s not literal timetravel just El using her powers to explore tra*matic memories of others (Terry/Billy so far). Like NO TIME TRAVEL PLEASE-THAT’S JUMPING THE SHARK. I really don’t want it lol. XD I think hopper and Robin's lines allude to the theme that will be addressed: confronting the past/times that harmed you but overcoming it for the future because time goes on 'whether you like it or not '.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

In reference to my time-did theory. Look at the st s4 movie inspirations. In ‘what dreams may come”  a guy explores a heaven like world influenced by a painter’s emotions/created via immagination.We also have the movie ‘inside out’ -which involves “memory islands” (distinct worlds based on a child’s memories) which are influenced negatively by the kid being depressed she moved to California. The characters traveling to these memory islands are constructs of  kid’s mind -and 1 of them also has a guide helping them explore the ‘memory islands’.  Welcome to marwen- has an artist (attacked for being perceived as gay) imagining an abstract world based off his art- where the characters he made experience their own adventures (loosely based off the artist’s trauma). ‘The cell ‘ has characters explore the mind of a guy whose father ab*sed him- and the different alternative fantasy-worlds they explore are based off his memories. The cop exploring these memory-worlds, was also implied to be se*ually ab*sed by his dad . Also,in  Inception a guy says he’s a construct of a guy’s mind ( the guy who created the dream worlds that are like alternate dimensions/levels- also hates his dad). And leo’s character says he needs to help him escape the many different levels of the dream world of the mind. Movies like inception, total recall, the cell, enter the void, wizard of oz, Peter Pan, hellraiser 2, dream warriors, bill & ted’s bogus journey, the labyrinth,and welcome to marwen, all allude to this: because they involve entering simulated abstract worlds usually created/based on happy& traumatic memories/fears. While truman show/matrix are more about realizing your reality isn’t real. While in bladerunner 2044/total recall it has the theme of false implanted memories… probably relating to hopper/el realizing they’re alters of Will’s-and their memories were technically created by him.

Something some DiD suffers have are “innerworlds” .When someone has DID there can be multiple “innerworlds” that are separate from one another (and look very different from one another) .And are usually very abstract worlds that are based on the child’s memories (good &bad) . These worlds are usually created at different times and almost act like alternate dimensions (and the inhabitants -npcs/alters of those worlds usually don’t interact with one another) . So they can almost resemble alternate dimensions like how Scott Clarke mentions “Hugh Everett’s many worlds interpretation.” Russia where Hopper is- is probably one of those innerworlds.

HOPPER THEORY: 

tw:ab*se/r*pe. In s2 Nancy asks Steve how his “grandpa’s time in the war is a metaphor for your life?” And steve compares the mf to the germans in the war. Dr owens mentions Will has ptsd like “ (vietnam) soldiers’, Hopper saying he had buddies like Will . “In the 70s there was a study that compared the post-traumatic stress symptoms in Vietnam veterans and adult survivors of childhood s**ual ab*se. The study revealed that childhood s**ual ab*se is traumatizing and can result in symptoms comparable to symptoms from war-related trauma.” Hopper isn’t actually in Russia -but in one of the innerworlds (after he jumped through the rift of the machine- into Will’s mind). We’ll see flashbacks but also present circumstances of his imprisonment echo Will’s past with Lonnie (if the movies indicate anything)- being starved, guards getting payed in order to let other prisoners  r*pe a gay prisoner (than claim incorrectly because of his sexuality he wanted it) , as well as a gang of sadist men who r**e others and a warden using that as a threat to be compliant , being thrown in a dark room of solitary confinement and starved when they didn’t obey the warden, the warden being religious, etc. And the American soldiers (in Vietnam) in the movies aren’t much better and do similarly horrific acts to civilians like r**e and bragging/ happily k*lling women, children, and the elderly. The drill sergant in vietnam calling them homophobic slurs & women, and chocking one of the soldiers with one hand (like the mf/russian), slapping one for not believing in christianity. Tying up a soldier in a bed , gagging him, beating him and saying “remember it’s just a dream.” Only praising them when good in fire arms.(movies : fullmetal jacket, papillon, shawshank redemption, platoon, welcome to marwen, etc ) . My assumption is flashbacks of his life-  hints about him being an alter -the boxes in the basement are “vietnam” ,“dad”, and “ny” (and these are the memories of his we’ll see).or after escaping the prison he’s stuck in diff innerworlds of memories. And some of the bad characters in said stories will also parallel Lonnie . Like how in  the s4 film ‘peterpan’- the young girl Wendy imagines netherland and the villain -captain hook- is based off her father ( in the movie they have the same voice actors/while in all stage productions the 2 characters are always played by the same actor). Similar to the other s4 film- ‘wizard of oz’ where the wicked witch of the west from the mythical land of Oz (is played by Dorothy’s real life mean neighbor in the real world/kansas).Or in ‘the cell’- all the alternate dimensions of the dream world that were created by a guy with a ab*sive h*mophobic dad -had the same actor play the villain in each very different dream dimension. ”Not sure if they’d use Ross Patridge (actor of Lonnie) in this way . But it would be very interesting if (In makeup) Ross played many negative people in Hopper’s life.  

Also, in  s2, Jonathan mentions Indiana writer Vonnegut- In his book ‘slaughterhouse 5′- Vonnegut begins the story of Billy (William) Pilgrim, a man who has “come unstuck in time”. (time ref of Hopper saying he wants to ‘turn back the clock.’ or’ runaway from his memories.‘It accounts of Billy Pilgrim’s capture and incarceration by the Germans during the last years of World War II (Hopper captured by the russians), and scattered throughout the narrative are episodes from Billy’s life with his dad, and his own wife and kids.Billy is forced to be part of the war and similar things against his free will. The moments start from his childhood when his father throws him in the water to teach him how to swim. He was unwillingly drafted into the war. Later, he is kidnapped by Tralfamadorians  (aliens that are implied to be caused by his mental health issues/trauma) against his will. Therefore, he realizes that this concept is just an illusion.in bladerunner 2044/total recall it has the theme of false implanted memories… probably relating to hopper realizing he’s an alter and his memories are technically ‘created’ . Like in total recall- the bad ass spy is told all his memories: his wife/ years of marriage,  his name, are just implanted memories. And she says “you’re life is a dream.” We also have ‘Arrival’ -the parent’s daughter died young cause of terminal cancer- and the mother later realizes time is also just a abstract construct (a thing she can experience differently than others), but she still finds meaning/happiness in those memories/times.

I also talked about how sarah as an alter could come back and the 2 would explore the “innerworlds” of Will’s mind together (you can read the details there). 

El and Will theory 

I’m thinking of the s4 movies and 1 matrix scene comes to mind that could be an obvious hint to Did (and Will’s importance). Mr smith (the suited calm villain/ who is a literal computer program of the matrix world -cough alter/npc of Will’s) kidnaps/ ties up Morpheus to a chair (like Will in s2), injects him with drugs in the neck ( like s3 steve/ will’s arm in s2).  Then Mr smith says as everyone leaves the room “I’m going to be honest with you. I hate this place, this prison, this reality or what you call it.” (grabs Morpheus’ head and glares) “ I need to get out of here! I need to be free! And this mind is the key.”(referring to morpheus).morpheus also translates to ‘god of dreams’. Also Morpheus was wearing head gear similar to El in s1/Will in s2 . or in 12 monkeys the guy sent to psych ward -starts believing he’s just “crazy” and says “i created a world with those people in it.” “It’s not real .I’m just mentally ill, like you said ” when you know- it is all real,cause of the supernatural angle involved. in 12 monkeys a patient even tells him the fictional world he created would dissappear once his mental health was in order.

Then there’s the El stuff.  Hellraiser 2- has a normal psych hospital, but the basement floor has an evil psychiatrist experimenting on teens to open a portal to another reality. assasains creed/dream warriors -  has the psychiatric facility be similar to the s1 lab with sensory deprivation tanks, cameras, solitary confinement in dark rooms.The doctor experiments on them- and forces a character to go into the memories of another individual (we know El has memory powers).The dr reveals how the character’s reality/whole life isn’t what they think it is (and that the memories they saw with their powers-was their past life and they are that person’s reincarnation) . Aka Will is the host- and El is an alter (alters can see memories of other alters/the host irl-aka billy/terry were also alters ).

In assasain’s creed there’s 2 psychiatrists- one bad / one who is good (but influenced by the bad dr). One dr annoyed at the lack of progress, says about the patient “he doesn’t want to remember his father.” While one dr doesn’t want to rush the therapy/ the other dr wants the patient to go back into his memories regardless of how it affects him. (which could be Brenner & maybe Owens referring to Will’s dissociative-amnesia and not remembering all the ab*se Lonnie did. And Owens not wanting to rush it/hurt el by making her go into said memories …but Brenner not caring.

also other hints : Cough s4 using the movie wizard of oz refs “we’re not in Hawkins (kansas) anymore”-hint at russia. David on instagram posting st stuff and captioning it with and quotes, pretending to be dorothy from the film. Hopper in s1 saying hawkins lab was “emerald city” (referencing El- it’s also why they reference El entering our world in ep 1 and the alice in wonderland song plays) . Murray says about the supernatural “no one wants to see behind the curtain” (what was behind the curtain in wizard of oz-was a wizard aka Will). Or you know right before Will sees the mf for the first time -a clock turns rapidly/ he  has goosbumps at the back of his neck. Which he later grabs/states  are from “memories” he can’t remember that are like a “dream”. 

If i’m right-not sure how much of this may happen in s4 vs s5, though. But I think something like this is possible.  For all we know-Will/El being trapped with Brenner while Hopper escapes ‘russia’ could be how the season ends? The timeline i’m a bit iffy about-tbh.

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Unfiltered thoughts on Bonafides and Pandora’s Box:

Prelude: When you air 2 episodes back to back, it’s best if you have them both have a story connection to each other. That’s why the 2 hour Season 3 finale and 2 hour Season 8 premiere and 2 hour Season 9 finale were hits.

Airing 2 random episodes that were both badly written and could’ve easily been watched separately with little issue, not the best way to have an event type of night. Especially if all it does is get you 2 episodes closer to the Season being over and hopefully getting the big episode that you’ve been anticipating all Season!

And also: If the episode is badly written, does it really matter who the director is???? No, it doesn’t. And that makes the so called ‘hype’ for this ‘double header’ stupid. (also, there’s no way I’m about to call someone who has directed 3 Hetty less episodes a ‘legend’. Especially when 2 of those episodes were absolutely terrible.).

Thoughts on Bonafides:

Remember allllll the way back in, Season 1 or 2 when Hetty made a huge deal out of Sam reusing old undercover ID’s? Where was the huge deal now, or has that also been forgotten along with everything else this show did right in the old days?

Just, how many Young Callen’s have we had here, and how many of these flashbacks actually made actual canon sense (other then the ending of Rage)??

Friendly reminder: The reason Callen is alive now is because of Hetty taking him in when he was 15. She took care of him, she taught him how to survive in the real world, and she openly said that he is the closest to a son she’s ever had. That, is, the, TRUTH!!!!!!! 🎉🎉

I’m now personally rooting for Hetty to literally kick Killjoy’s pathetic ass off a really long pier, because this fake ‘good guy’ shit is pure 🤢

They, fucking, changed Rage’s ending. That’s it. This is not NCIS LA, this is officially an imposter with the same fucking name!!! 😡😡😡😡

Thoughts on Pandora’s Box:

Recycling a plot from what I originally thought was the worst Season ever, how lazy.

Before you start celebrating that this show isn’t going down the ‘adopting an illegal alien who doesn’t look a kid at all which would never happen IRL’ path, the actress confirmed that she’ll be back in the future, and I have zero fuck as to why.

No idea what went down in this episode, too busy being furious.

All in all: This isn’t NCIS LA anymore. It’s an imposter show. Makes sense doesn’t it? All the changes? All the retconning? This is clearly an imposter show!

Friendly reminder of how Hetty and Callen met: He was 15, and she was saving him from going to jail. Don’t believe me? Then rewatch Rage!! That is how they met, and that is the literal fucking truth regardless of what these brain dead bitches try to say!!!!!

I may be the most desperate clown alive who wants to see Hetty again at all cost, but I draw a strict line at fucking retcons!! (and yes, I swear a lot more when I’m pissed!!!!! 😡😡😡)

More thoughts:

Here’s a good example of a legend: Someone who....

-Overcomes her lifelong small size to become 1 of the greatest actresses ever

-Becomes the 1st woman to win an Oscar for playing a man

-Gets a Series Regular role in what becomes 1 of the most popular and long running cop shows in America, and turns that role into a masterpiece of toughness and love.

THAT, is a great example of a legend. Not someone whose ‘since day 1′ Series Regular role has been reduced to ‘obsessing over having a family no matter how bent from reality it gets’ and directs 3 average episodes in which 2 are very badly written. (and yeah, with the Oscars airing tonight, that stuff above this paragraph felt appropriate to bring up. 😁).

This Saturday is 1 of the best days to browse the #ncis la tag on Twitter. I’ll be in an amazing mood that day (if I’m not being still being furious), IF a few specific Twitter accounts that I won’t name don’t forget whose birthday that is.